#Best case scenario is my parents are on vacation

[dhwty-writes]

today i realised something I already knew that frightened me nonetheless: whenever I actually get my tiddies yeeted I absolutely cannot ask my parents to care for me if I don't want to traumatise my mother. And I genuinely do not know who else to ask

[throwawaytumble]

I have a large amount of asks with much of the same comments and questions, so rather than bombard everyone, I'm going to answer them here.

1. I have had consistent therapy since I decided to be a pediatric oncologist. Considering it is a very intensive field with a (predictably and understandly) high burnout rate, it is highly, highly recommended to do so, and even if it hadn't been, I would have done so anyway.

2. I have spoken about the farm incident with a few select people - my boyfriend chiefly, one professor, an ex boyfriend of mine, and my two earliest therapists. My first therapist insisted that I only wanted to be an oncologist as an attempt to rebel against my family. He insisted I not go through with it. After a year he recused himself as my therapist, and I wasn't going to argue as I personally found him misogynistic. The second therapist did focus on our obligation to society and the familial structure as a whole, as well as western individualism being inherently selfish. It was her idea for me to call my family when I graduated, and did tell me that while I do have an obligation to apologize, I am not owed forgiveness. My ex boyfriend and current boyfriend were both fully on my side, and the professor said he saw both sides.

3. Over the past few years my brother has not once raised his voice to me or become passive aggressive or argumentative. That is why him shouting and dragging this out through text gave me pause. He has been very helpful in other ways as well over the past two years. What concerns me is not that he has had a temper this whole time - what concerns me is that despite the times I have talked about vacations and my boyfriend with him, he did not ask me for clarification or in any way confront me about the possibility of me lying. Given that in person he has always given the impression of believing me, has never said anything rude, passive aggressive, or anything approaching insulting, I was surprised he called me a liar when I was not there to defend myself. I understand thst this means best case scenario he didn't want to hurt my feelings whilst attempting to reconcile, and worst case scenario is setting me up to be disbelieved by his children (or others).

4. While the focus has been on the farm, and rightly so, I do want to point out my parents had severe issues with my interest in horror, goth, and true crime culture. (Yes, I even wore corpse paint.) So did the schools. There were rumors I was going to be the next school shooter. I was forced into school counseling with all the troubled kids. It was very dramatic. Honestly I'm adding this because it's silly to consider now, how dramatic this all was. Also my current style is very much not that way anymore so I do sometimes laugh at my past self and her sense of style. Also my very graphic artwork and comics didn't help.

5. My brother's ex wife will be here soon to meet my boyfriend. My brother will also be there. I plan on having a discussion with him about this with witnesses.

Not necessarily important but I want to explain that I am not a novelist and the majority, if not all, of my writing experience has been clinical or essayist in nature so if I sound detached or brusque that is not my intention. I am emotionally affected by this. Thank you all, once again.

[jiya21]

HOW I INTOXICATED MY LIFE FROM TOXIC PEOPLE AND HOW YOU CAN DO IT!

Toxic people are people who makes your life worse and hard, these toxic relationships can lead to too much overthinking, anxiety and in worse cases depression.

well i had a toxic friend and because of her actions i had depression for more than an year in my second high school year and i even lost trust with people who i really wanted in my life. i met her after the vacations in school i wanted a friend and she wanted someone to help her with the assignments she wasn't able to do and being a kind helpful child my parents raised me as, i decided to help her and that was the worst decision i ever made. well, everything was going well till first two weeks when she just started with the thing she called 'emotional manipulation' and not only i was included we were 5 people and her biggest goal was to make me feel down whatsoever, she started talking rash about her parents to us, okay i do agree, if your parents don't really care about you, you tell your friends and that's what i thought earlier. after that every single day she talked about her parents being really strict and making rules that did not make any sense. it seemed sensible but the moment i heard the reason she got scoldings it was just... well i didn't get it. her mom scolded her cause she wasn't having her lunch in school and her mom did not wanted her to starve. i just want to know, this is normal for a parent to scold their kids if they are not eating properly right? then why was she getting scolded for this and the terror on her face i saw when she was speaking to me. she was creating normal parents conversations into serious matters like my parents are fighting they will get divorced and stuff and just sat in class and acted like a victim and i was freaking falling for that.

when i used to get home from school i used to had fights with my my and it felt like this is happening to me too this is not normal my parents don't want em and stuff like that and used to cry too much and when my mom used to come just to comfort me i used to think she'll act all good and then it will all be normal again. during my final semester exams i got a chance to meet her parents and honestly if there was a definition of perfect parents then her parents where the one even my parents really liked her parents they were cool people and before my final exam in evening she called but i was not there at that moment so my mom picked up the phone and she started talking shit about her parents to my mom... okay now that was something new to me and when my mom declined her call and my looked at me and said just try to be safe from her and the scenarios she used to create just to prove everyone was even worse. this every day mind and emotional manipulation was just breaking me apart i used to top all my classes but that year i was gonna fail in one of my classes and the pressure just got bigger and i was devastated.

after all this i kinda started to understand what was actually happening my best friend really helped me with this she just taught me to say no and be a bit confident she used to teach me night before exam and the one who created this mess just said you should work hard next time and when it didn't happened i gave up on my goal and just was isolated i didn't even talked to my mom and shared anything to her. after all this and when my exams where finally over i just had a bit time for me and that is what is the most important thing to heal from emotional wounds. i just sat back and had a talk with my inner self, just asked is it good for my, is everything going alright, what is holding me back, do i have a goal, what i really want to do. and my conclusion was whatever was happening was not good for me and the second step i did was just found a reason to start a fight with her and most importantly just between me and her and after thinking hundreds of times i just said what i actually felt and i suggest you to say it right there if you don't feel right. and honestly after that fight she tried talking to me but i didn't, it was way harder than it looks honestly and the whole process took me at least 4-5 months. i wanted to move on but i was feeling guilty and so tried surrounding myself with people and most importantly positive people the ones who really need you. i didn't really had many friends so i stared sharing things with my mom then slowly i started making friends.

healing is a time consuming process and it will take time to move on, be confident and to start saying no. but trust me if i can do it you can too i know it is easy to say to really hard to stand and fight for yourself but I've been through so much more than this that i didn't even mention i was just in trouble for the most of my high school life.

i did it and you can too just have faith in yourself self love is also really important just trust yourself and get out of that black hole you are stepping your feet into.

hope my story gave you a bit motivation to start the healing process and move on. hope it helps you and others in need.

peace~

[bisluthq]

So while I agree that 2 income parents and also 1 income parents hire help and everything else you said there I just want to object to your statement that daycare/aftercare is not the goal. It has absolutely been mine and other working parents first choice and in my opinion the assertion that it is not as good is stigmatizing to using that resource and implies that stay at home parent is the ultimate best case scenario. Group childcare benefits (in my opinion, for my family and my particular kids) include that the care is regulated and licensed, it's reliable ie you dont get stuck by your one caregiver being sick, on vacation or having a conflict, your kids have a lot of social interaction and outside time and you don't have to deal with being someone's boss.

fair enough! Sorry if that came off judgy!! I don’t think you’re a bad parent for sending your child to aftercare. If it works best for you, that’s dope! I also agree with your benefits in terms of extra socialization and also it being more reliable than if you’ve got an au pair. Honestly, there’s no one size fits all I think for a lot of this stuff. Homeschooling for instance works great for some families and is a total disaster for other people. Boarding school works great for some families and is a total disaster for other people. Even like public v private works depending on the setup - one isn’t necessarily better than the other. Fwiw families that live in multigenerational setups might have grandparents as the “free childcare” but that works in those kinds of setups because everyone’s living together and it works best. Like there definitely isn’t one way to do parenting/childcare and I’m sorry if it came off mom shamey at all (wasn’t my intention).

But also like if you can afford shit there’s nothing wrong with doing it was my ultimate point. Having a cleaning service or an au pair or using a garden service doesn’t make you a bad or lazy person. My issue is celebs acting like they don’t have help lol when they… absolutely do. Fwiw if a celeb said “we don’t have a nanny because our kids go to aftercare because we think that’s a better fit” like you just said, I’d also not have a second thought. But they always say they don’t really have help because they’re “so involved” which implies people who have an au pair (or send their kid to aftercare) aren’t? Which is just silly.

anyway, you’re right and I’m glad it’s working for you guys!

[ms-demeanor]

Also nobody who hasn't spent forever being treated for insomnia or who hasn't done extensive reading on circadian rhythm disorders or who isn't someone who actually studies sleep is ever impressed enough by this:

I added two hours of sleep to my average night by making one simple intervention that didn't require medication or an enforced zone of darkness and quiet for everyone in the house and that can't be disrupted by a vacation or staying up on New Year's.

Sometimes I feel a little crazy with how badly I want people to understand *THAT IS A HUGE FUCK OFF DEAL*, that is a life-changing improvement with a minimal intervention and that intervention is "feel free to hang out in bed and be ready to fall asleep whenever you start feeling sleepy at bedtime, whether that's on the couch or in your bed or on the floor because if you have to *get up* to put yourself to bed you are going to delay when you are actually able to fall asleep and if you're bad at reading your body signals that might push your sleep back by several hours."

Two hours is, like, the best case scenario goal for a lot of sleep improvement plans, over and above what is typical for most people under the supervision of a doctor. And I managed to pull that off because I stopped hanging out with my laptop in a chair in my garage and started hanging out with my phone in bed.

So yeah if you're, like, the parent of a chronically under-slept teen with ADHD or whatever please for the love of fuck just let them start sleeping on the couch if that's where they fall asleep instead of making them get up and go to bed. Just try it. See what happens. For a lark.

I think the eight alarms thing is usually a maladaptation. You've trained your brain to ignore the eight alarms because you kept avoiding the training of willpower following the first alarm would require. I think some sleep therapy might help?

Hey so first of all fuck you, thanks.

Second: I love it when you read literature on sleep disorders, especially if it's on sleep disorders among folks with ADHD, and you see time and time again "when allowed to sleep on their preferred schedule subjects maintained healthy, normal, restorative sleep cycles" and "effects were not lasting without ongoing intervention; resetting the sleep schedule is a permanent effort."

Like, if I sleep *great* from 6am to 2pm and I wake up feeling rested and alert with no special help but I need to turn off the lights in my house and shut down all electronics at 8pm and beam a spotlight into my face starting at 5am to wake up at seven and feel exhausted all day, I think perhaps it is not actually my sleep cycle that is wrong it is perhaps society that is wrong.

BELIEVE ME, when I find the job that pays well and has decent insurance that lets me exist as a cheerful nighttime ghoul I am jumping on that with both feet. But until then I literally feel better getting six hours of sleep and occasionally sleeping so hard that i can't hear my alarms because of chronic sleep deprivation than I do turning off all the lights in my house and ceasing all activity two and a half hours after I get off of work.

Also: the eight alarms aren't all there to wake me up, it's just that sometimes I *also* sleep through the ones that are supposed to remind me to go sit at my desk and start work. One of the first three usually gets me up, but on a day when I sleep through all three of those I will be sleeping through all eight of them and usually a phone call and someone trying to shake me awake to.

ANYWAY after being treated with melatonin and light therapy and staring listlessly at the ceiling in the dark bored out of my skull with racing thoughts for sleep disorders that I didn't have for like twenty years the single most effective intervention that allowed me to get more sleep as someone with both ADHD and DSPD was to start hanging out and being active in places where it would be easy to fall asleep if the sleep caught me there instead of turning my bedroom into a dark, silent shrine of snoozing. Giving myself permission to fall asleep late instead of laying awake chewing myself up with guilt for not being asleep helped too.

Actually here's some tips for the sleepy bitches in the crowd:

1 - If you're laying down and not falling asleep in half an hour, you're not actually sleepy; read something or get up and do something because you're more likely to get sleepy faster that way than you are staring at the clock going "if I fall asleep now I'll have three hours and forty five minutes of rest when I have to go to work; If I fall asleep now I'll have three hours and twenty minutes of sleep when I have to get up, etc. etc."

2 - Allow yourself to be ambushed by sleep. Fall asleep on your cozy couch. Fall asleep in the comfy chair. Let yourself sleep where you fall asleep instead of dragging yourself to where you're 'supposed' to sleep if doing so will wake you up.

3 - The mythbusters thing. If you just lay down and close your eyes and pretend to rest you will feel more rested when you get up than when you laid down. Laying down to rest is better than nothing, it literally causes cognitive improvements similar to sleep in tests, and knowing that can help take off some of the pressure of not being able to fall asleep and can thus help you fall asleep.

4 - It's okay to "hang out" in the area where you're going to sleep. Read in bed. Play games on your cellphone in bed. If you want to go to sleep put on comfy clothes and bring a chill activity and hang out in your bed to do it so that all you have to do when you start getting sleepy is close your eyes.

5 - It's better to get some sleep than no sleep. Sometimes you look at the clock and it's six AM and whoops, fuck it. Okay, time for bed, don't stress that you're only going to get a few hours, a few hours is better than nothing. Lay down to pretend to rest at least and you'll probably feel okay.

6 - This one sounds silly and might not work for a bunch of people for a bunch of reasons but apparently there's some research suggesting that "well-rested" is a state of mind? I've had a reasonable amount of success with just telling myself "Yeah, I actually feel pretty good," and pushing through the day on a couple of hours of sleep. I don't *recommend* that and you should try to get as much sleep as possible, but yeah the next time you're low on sleep see what happens if you just try to decide to not be tired. It sounded like bullshit to me when I first heard it but I've found some success with it.

7 - This shit is cumulative. If you're doing a couple nights a week on low sleep that's not ideal but you're probably going to be pretty functional and you can work on it. If you overbook and overextend yourself for too long - I'm looking at you college students and new parents - it's going to add up. Try as much as possible to at least keep your sleep deficit nights spread out. (This message brought to you by writing 60k words of fiction in october and completely frying my brain because i wasn't getting enough sleep).

[flashlight-smallknife]

New Jersey setting up rec sales was really best case scenario bc visiting my parents used to be a nightmare and now it’s just like “ok we’re gonna get flavor blasted and get gelatis from Rita’s or Wawa hoagies and head to the mall or into Philly or down the shore to go people watching.” Like now it’s a vacation where I can pick out my little treats from the dispo and chill without a care in the world.

Plus like…it’s kinda scary just existing as a queer person in the Bible Belt. I’m definitely offered a lot of protections living in a college town but leaving town can be scary. Nobody is quite as pressed to kill me for existing in Jersey. I can hold my wife’s hand in public without being afraid.

Like. I am by no means ready to come back. I will probably always feel most at home in the mountains. But damn, this is kinda nice.

[yoursleepingbaby]

Top Sleep Tips for Traveling with Young Kids | Sleep Training

Summer is right around the corner and many of you are going to be packing up your family and taking a vacation. You’re looking forward to a break from your routine and some much-needed R&R. I’ll give you my best tips for how to actually have a “relaxing” vacation WITH kids along.

My BEST advice is don’t go on a vacation with a baby or toddler who isn’t already sleeping well if you can help it! Traveling in and of itself is exhausting. Reach out for help if your little ones’ sleep needs some troubleshooting before you leave!

Now let’s talk about some of my favorite tips and products for sleep when traveling. While relaxing the schedule and being more “go with the flow” is a necessary part of traveling with kids, we all know that rested kiddos (and parents!) are going to make for a better vacation for everyone!

Here are my top tips for making sure that everyone comes home from vacation feeling rested and rejuvenated!

Make sure that you have a plan for setting up an environment that is conducive to sleep for everyone in your family. Ideally, if you can sleep in separate rooms from your kids that is the best-case scenario. If not, then here’s what you need to do to ensure that sleep happens for everyone when sleeping in the same room together. You will need to be able to control the light first and foremost. These are some of my favorite black-out curtains for traveling — https://bit.ly/3yLXNQX and these ( https://amzn.to/3wqQEE4)

Bring familiar nursery items so the sleep space is as much like home as possible. Crib sheets, toddler pillow, favorite blanket, lovey, sleep sack/swaddle or favorite stuffed animal. A White noise machine is also a must when traveling as it blocks out unfamiliar sounds and allows everyone to function if all are sleeping in the same room. (Here is my favorite travel sound machine: https://amzn.to/38FjJ5l) It is re-chargeable in case you don’t have a plug nearby and can clip onto a stroller or car seat for naps on the go.

If you have a baby or toddler still in a crib and will be room sharing then setting up a “room within a room” is a necessity. If your baby or toddler can see you from the crib your sleep plan is going to be doomed! My favorite portable sleep space is the slumber pod. It’s like a little cave and babies and toddlers both love it and sleep amazingly well in it! I’ve had parents set it up at home once they return, because their kiddos slept so well while on vacation! (Here is the link https://bit.ly/3LrOdFm)

If you have a toddler you can make up a floor bed if space is tight and use this inflatable bed ( https://amzn.to/3Npbl92) If you’re going to be using a pack n play or similar, my best advice is to bring a king-size sheet or get one wherever you’re staying, and bring some thumbtacks with you. You can either put the pack-n-play in the closet and drape a sheet over the rod to create a “tent” or put the crib up against a wall and use the tacks to secure the sheet to the wall and drape over the crib.

This will create a “room” for your baby or toddler and keep them from being able to see you. This will keep them from being overly anxious about being in a new sleeping environment and because they won’t be able to see around the room it keeps stimulation to a minimum. This is SUPER helpful when sleeping in an unfamiliar environment. Pop your white noise machine under the crib and you’ve got yourself a perfect sleep space for your little one!

BUILD REST and MARGIN into your vacation. There is nothing worse for kids than being overbooked! It creates STRESS for everyone and will leave everyone feeling frustrated and anxious. Allow for downtime/playtime throughout your day. Plan for at least one crib nap a day and depending on where you are, maybe even two if your schedule allows. This will help keep your baby or toddler rested and make for a better vacation for everyone. If stroller or car naps have to happen that’s ok too. I’m a big believer in adaptability and predictability so do the best you can, but don’t let it stress you out! The schedule is not going to be perfect when traveling. For babies, keeping feeds on track will help tremendously in keeping sleep on track or mostly on track. When feeds start going awry so does sleep!

If you’re at a hotel and can get a room that has an outdoor patio or space for you to relax while your baby or toddler naps this is also very convenient! It gives you some downtime, right outside your room while your baby is sleeping. Oh! And don’t forget the monitor. You may need it!

One of my favorite “relaxing” vacations with kids is the BEACH! Kids will play for HOURS in the sand and water. If you have a baby along they can sit on a blanket and play under an umbrella. Many babies will even nap on the beach. The sound of the water lulls them right to sleep! That means you can sit and relax while your kids play, pick up seashells and run up and down the beach. This also wears them out! This was by far our FAVORITE family vacation when our kids were little. We would go to Coronado, CA every summer and stay for 10 days, and aside from the beach prep AND clean-up, ( which was A LOT of work, I’m not gonna lie) the rest of the day was very relaxing for EVERYONE! The more kids can be outdoors in the fresh air the happier they will be.

This can be a HUGE hassle when traveling with young kids or babies. If you’re going to be gone for less than two weeks, do your best to stay in your home time zone. Your kids may start to gravitate to the new time zone after week one and that’s ok. Just get back on track when you get home by waking them at their normal time. Don’t let vacation habits linger once you’re back. Get back into your normal routine right away. It may take 2–3 days for everyone to adjust to being home and back into their routine. Expect some struggle as your kids transition back into their sleep and activity routines.

Try to maintain the same or similar bedtime routine while on vacation. This helps your baby or toddler to feel safe and secure as it is a predictable part of their routine and cues their brain that it’s time for sleep.

I hope these tips have been helpful and you are feeling more prepared for traveling and making memories with your young kiddos. Reach out to me for more tips and sleep help if you’re feeling anxious or unprepared. I’m always here to help!

Learn more at https://yoursleepingbaby.com 

[sweetsbfreex]

a styles vacation to Hawaii

Summary: a little continuation of this family. The styles take a vacation to Hawaii with mild bumps in the road. 

a/n: no warnings, but harry is not famous in this. I’ve never been to Hawaii and do not much of the hawaiian attire/culture, i just did research and put what i found. If there’s any misconceptions or if i’ve offended anyone by accident pls lmk!

Pairings: Dad, Husband!Harry

“Honey, you have to let go so we’re not late for the plane” Harry grunts, trying to stealthily pull Ava away from her hold on Milo. 

“No! We can’t leave Mimi” she cries out, cuddling her face into the pup’s fur even more. 

“Mimi has to stay with nan, honey” From his tone you can tell he’s losing patience.

It’s a definite eyesore. The whole situation takes place on your mother's porch. You were all meant to say your goodbyes before the three of you–– no Milo–– go off on a small vacation to Hawaii. 

Ava is holding on to the australian shepherd, not letting up one bit. You would think she glued herself onto him without anyone knowing, with how she latched on.

Milo in front of your mother's feet, enjoying what he thinks is a hug it seems. Only letting out long whines when Ava's sobs get out of control.

Harry is standing behind Ava, bent at the wait trying to pry her off her best friend.

You're crouched beside her, a hand on her back, trying to convince her to let go.

Ava's poor grandmother stands in the doorway. A look of agony on her face as she watches it all go down.

The–– now three year old–– has been throwing a hissy fit in the car, holding onto Milo's paw. Ever since Harry informed her how they were going to her nan's house to drop off Milo and then hurry to the plane. She saw the news like a terrible taste in her mouth, while she stared at you both in the rearview mirror eyes widened. 

You know how much the two love each other, but you didn't expect her to throw a fit like this.

“Ava I know you’re upset but, you gotta let go honey so Mimi can have fun with grandma. Don’t you want to go on the airplane, hm? Weren’t you excited about it?” You ask her, beginning to unclasp one hand and go for the other, trying to bring into your arms.

But with quickness, she remembered the only way she would be able to go on this vacation. Without Milo, she wraps her arms around Milo again. 

“Baby, Milo has to stay. Dog’s aren’t allowed in Hawaii” At this moment, Harry is willing to try anything.

“They’re not?” she asks, tilting her head back a little to see her father’s face. 

“Nope, Milo won’t have fun there. He’ll have more fun with Nana” he tells her, bringing his thumbs down to wipe away the tears. 

“...I wanna stay with Mimi!” 

Milo doesn’t eject this idea, letting his chin rest on her small shoulder. You and Harry huff in frustration, glancing at each other. Your mother...well she’s had enough of whatever foolishness you and H are pulling right now. 

“Okay enough of this” your mother starts, gaining everyone’s attention. “Ava, honeybee, Tell Milo and your grandma see you later and let go of him so you can have fun on your trip with your parents.” She says this with a stern, yet loving tone. Down to business and nothing else. 

“Yes nana” she mumbles, placing a few kisses to Milo’s cheek and glides to your mom. 

You and Harry look at each other in an instant, eyes wide at the way your mother fixed the problem in less than a minute. A mutual look of what the fuck, as in the what the fuck were you possibly doing wrong. 

“Thanks mum.” Harry says sheepish, looking at the calming little one swaying in your mother’s arms.  

“Yeah thanks mom” you say, standing up straight.

“No problem, Now get going, before she fusses again”

You all exchange your see you laters. Ava has yet another sweet moment with Milo. While Harry tells her she won't be staying in Hawaii forever and Milo won't stay with Nana forever. As you're driving away you all wave at the two, Ava yelling to Milo.

“Bye Mimi! See you soon! Don’t chase a squirrel when I’m gone!” She yells out the window, her arm waving in the wind. 

You and Harry share a chuckle. Despite what she may think, Milo has never chased a squirrel in his life. She's watched it once on a cartoon and it somehow filled her heard with the imaginary scenario. 

When both her grandmother and bestfriend are out of sight, she turns her head to the other window. A solemn look on her face, looking out the window like the Kermit the Frog meme. 

You play the Frozen 2 soundtrack for the less pouty girl behind you. But when you don't hear the shrill sound of her singing, you look behind you to see an upset look upon her cherub face. 

Her bottom lip is juts out, her hands fisted and arms crossed. 

“You okay?” you ask her, turning in your seat to cradle her knee. 

She’s dressed cutesy in a matching sweat set and a cute beanie rested over her plaits. 

“No. I’m upset and I wanna yell” she looks at you, resting her case, before she turns her head back to its original spot. 

Harry peeks at the interaction through the rear view mirror; an eyebrow quirked. One hand on the wheel while the other takes its natural spot in your lap, your fingers tangled with his. 

“Why are you upset?” you ask. 

“Because…” she groans, trying to figure out her ‘big feelings’. “You left Mimi and now he’ll hate me” 

“He won’t hate you, you’re his favorite person” 

“You guys don’t love me either!” She whines, glaring out the window. Wigging in her spot, causing your hand to fall from her knee. 

“That’s not true! We love you” you exclaim, in a loving manner. 

“Then get Mimi” 

“Mimi is staying with grandma Ava, enough.” Harry’s voice catches her attention immediately. “ It's okay to be upset but Hawaii doesn’t accept dogs, remember?” 

She only huffs, dropping her hands from her chest. 

“Can you play the when I am older song, please mommy?” she almost whispers.

You accept her request, turning so you’re seated right. Playing the song and hearing her sing eases your glazed stare a bit. Releasing a breath and closing your eyes as you rest your head against the window adds a bit to your release. 

Harry raises the entangled hands away from your lap, placing an adored kiss to the back of your hand. Sending a quick questioning look your way. 

“I’m fine” you send back, in a smile. No mother wants to hear those words.

He can’t do much with him driving and with Ava in the car. So he places a kiss to the back of your hand once more, and extends his hand so he caresses the back of your neck. 

“You’re doing a great job, stop being so hard on yourself” he encourages.

If your mom was here she’d give you a tip or two on how you and Harry are too soft on Ava. You couldn’t help leaving all the disciplining to Harry, you probably were definitely too soft on her at times.  

-

Through all the pouting, belting of kid songs, and Harry's annoying jokes and teasing. Five hours later you've made it to the resort. 

At the moment, Harry was checking you both in while you and Ava looked around the gift shop. When you feel someone’s arm come around your shoulder, you jump. But the feeling of his cold rings and brings you down. 

“Scared me, don’t do that” a breath of relief follows as you tilt your head back onto his shoulder. He gets the memo immediately, leaning down for a peck to the lips. 

“Made a friend in the lobby.” He tells you like nothing. Eyes shifting at his little girl looking through the stuffed animals and keychains.  

“Are you okay?” you ask in disbelief. 

“What?” he laughs, one eyebrow perched.

“Like in the head”

“I’m not following…”

“Why are you so good at making friends with strangers this easily? Seriously.” 

He laughs you off like it’s nothing, but it’s uncomic. You wish you could blame it on being shy, but compared to Harry it was not that easy for you to chat up strangers enough that you become acquaintances. 

Your husband could make friends with a duck if he wanted to. Everywhere you went. Whether in the ice cream shop a few miles away at home or the park where you took Ava all the time .He was always chatting with someone, in the end pulling you in. 

He only laughs it off, beyond doubt enjoying the look on your face. “We agreed to save each other a seat at the Luau tonight, for whoever gets there first. Talked to the husband actually, but you’ll see”

“You’re insane” you tease him.

“Can I have this?” A teal, stuffed sea turtle is thrusts in the direction of you and Harry. 

“How do we ask nicely” you say. 

“Can I get this?” she smiles, a smile so sweet, your tooth hurts from looking at it. She’s the most adorable thing and knows exactly how to use it to her advantage. 

“My sweet little baby.” Harry crooned, advancing to her, lifting her into his tattooed arms. Placing a series of kisses to her plump cheeks. She giggles, never wanting the affection to stop. “You can have it,” he tells her. “Let’s go to the till.”

“Harry you didn’t even check the price” you chimed in. 

“Shh. We’re having a moment” he acknowledged. He outstretches his arm, so his palm meets your face gently. You laugh into it, before you smack his wrist away, then placing a light kiss to his wrist when he whines.  

-

It’s some hours later. You’re all getting ready for the hotel’s hosted dinner/Luau tonight. The three of you took a two and a half hour nap. 

You were touching up your light makeup while Harry got Ava ready. He lost two rounds of rock-paper-scissors and now must deal with the havoc that is dressing Ava. 

“Baby, get the trousers mommy picked out for you” you Harey him tell Ava. 

“Trousers?” She says the word with confusion, “Don’t have trousers babe? That’s a silly word.” 

Then you hear the raspy laugh of Harry. 

“Your pants, get your pants and your top too” 

Not even a minute later do you hear Harry asking her to stop wiggling around. 

Harry walks in the bathroom, a giggling Ava sat on his hip. 

Harry adores a very laid back...dad look you could say. The back of the white wife beater he’s wearing get’s covered by a black button up shirt with flamingos patterned all over it. He’s also wearing  a pair of shorts and his favorite vans. 

Ava’s tucked into a set. a cami top with matching flared pants and sunflowers ornamented the black fabric. 

“Oooh look at mumma, beautiful huh?” he asks Ava, extending one hand towards you, once you clasp your hands in his, he spins you letting his eyes sink in.

“Yeah!”

“Thank you both” you smile as Harry tugs you in for a swift kiss. 

You had picked out an angelic, ivory crochet set. The top you’re wearing shows off your midriff and the long, flowy skirt matches with beautiful lace detailing. 

You turn to Ava to give her a kiss on her cheek. “You look so handsome.” you tell Harry, letting your hand run through his hair. “And you look so adorable, you like your outfit?” taking her from Harry’s hands. 

“Yeah, I like the flowers–– Can I have some too?” she points to the plethora of makeup products spread over the bathroom counter. 

Looking over at Harry for his confirmation, he nods. You take the brush running it over the blush, before brushing it over her chubby cheeks and her nose.

“Tickles,” she laughs, pushing your hand away. 

“Are you ladies ready to go?” 

-

“Wow! Look the fires!” She points at the lines of tiki torches submerged into the sand, jumping as she sits on your hip. 

The layout is stunning. There’s a stage for the performance, round tables spread out everywhere across the beach, and a buffet in the back. 

Most of the tables are already filled, albeit the show was to start in like twenty minutes. 

“There they are, over there” Harry indicated, his hand waving back at a family of four. 

With Harry’s hand settled on your back, he weaved the three of you to the table. 

“Hey Shawn.” Harry greeted, their hands clasped together as they brought each other in, clapping each other on the back. 

Shawn was a tall man, a few inches taller than Harry, and very built. He had amazing brown skin, clear like a mirror, and was bald––which he pulled off effortlessly. 

“This is my wife, y/n and my daughter Ava” he smiled at the two of you, while you shook hands with Shawn and asked Ava to say a hello. Which she did, like bursting a ball of energy as put her hands out for a handshake like she watched her parents do. It caused a laugh out of everyone. She didn’t know why they were laughing at her, but she enjoyed the attention. 

“This is my wife Avni” you hugged, as close as you could, with a petite, expecting Indian woman. She was radiant as she smiled at you and Harry. “These are my kids Grey and Aster” you shook hands with them both. 

Grey looked about Ava’s age, bouncy coils moving as he bobbed up and down in his seat. His sister, who looked in her tweens, sported the same hair texture. Aster more silent of the two sent her greetings kindly. 

“And the third is still cooking in here” he laughed, setting his hands down on Avni’s early protruding belly. 

With that joke, you understand exactly how the two of them got to know each other, as Harry joined in with his laugh. The wives chuckled amongst themselves. 

“How far along are you?” you solicited.

“Three and a half months” Avni smiled proudly, rubbing both hands around her belly. 

You cooed, “It’s amazing, you’re literally glowing. You're making me miss being pregnant” you joke. 

“Okay! Enough of that. One little devil is enough.” Harry tickles your side, as a result you jab his side with your elbow gently, as he grins down at you. “We’re gonna go get some food,” he informs the couple.

-

Now everyone’s sitting around the table anticipating for the show to start. Conversation running pretty smoothly. The four of you were even able to make a few plans for the week you are here for. You had gotten a high chair for Ava to sit and eat in, but she wasn’t having it. Failing around while reaching for you.

 In result, she’s now sitting in your lap, bouncing side to side. Munching on her French fries, chicken, and sipping on her pineapple juice. 

“Taste good?” Harry asks his toddler. 

“Mhm” she hums, shoving her thumb into his face. 

“I can tell” he chuckles, extending a napkin to wipe her face clean. 

You tilt your head down closer to hers, to see sauce around her mouth, some of it on her cheek even. 

“Daddy.”

“Hm, baby?”

“Mimi would like this, he loves the chicken mommy gives me” 

“You give Mimi your chicken?”

“No”

You both laugh it off, not seeing the point in correcting her. 

“Who’s Mimi”

“Mimi is our dog, he's big and he can talk!” Ava answered, her voice ringing with excitement. 

“Dog’s can’t talk!” The high-pitched voice of Grey argued, eye brows pitched together. 

“That’s a fib, Mimi talks to me all the time!” she defended. 

Thankfully,  the show was beginning, two young women and four young men came out on stage. Dressed in their traditional Hula attire. 

You and Avni shared a grateful smile, knowing neither of you would know how to suppress their little spiff. 

The dance is mesmerizing and it was nice with the sun almost setting as a background. Light hues of orange shaded the sea as the night took over the rest.  Everyone watched in awh, clapping when it was appropriate. The women’s skirt flowed amongst the air like water.  

Harry’s arm propps on the back of your chair. During the performance you feel his fingers run against the back of your neck. 

You turn your head towards, trying not to disturb the entranced little girl on your lap. “What?” you mouth. 

“It’s beautiful” he whispers to you. 

“I know” you tell him, smiling when he rolls his eyes at you. 

At some point in the show, the original dancers plus a few more stepped off the stage. An array of Lei’s on their arms, watching as they put Leis around their chosen person’s neck. During this time a woman walks behind Harry, setting one around his neck. 

You laugh at the shocked look on his face and the way he fixes his posture. She places a grip onto his arm, making him stand up so she could guide her to the rest of the others. Avni gets chosen too. 

The smile on your face makes your face hurt as you watch Harry “dance” up there. The man definitely didn’t have the bet rhythm but he’s having fun and you loved that. 

“Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!...” Ava cheered on her father, clapping her hands. Harry looks towards her, waving. She gets even more excited chanting his title louder. 

She's Not interrupting anything, you’re surprised he heard her in the first place. But also not, she always knew how to project her voice when needed. 

A little over a minute goes by when Ava raises her hand and keeps it up there until you’re able to flag down someone for a lei, which you both get. The both of you walk up to Harry and you set Ava on the ground. 

A slight circle forms as you three hold hands together. Just swaying. Sometimes letting go because Harry wanted to spin the two of you. It’s a beautiful image, you're sure. All the glee you could hold in your body transpires in the way you danced with them. 

When you’re walking back to your hotel room, your arms are hooked with Harry’s and your head rests on his shoulder. An almost asleep Ava in his arm. He stops to bring his free hand around your neck, pulling you in for a kiss.

“Thank you for giving me this, I love you” he whispers against your lips. 

-

Last night, after the dinner and the Hula, Ava had facetimed Nana. To be honest, she had wanted to say a goodnight to Milo, but talking to her grandmother was always a plus. She was still dressed in her outfit, you and Harry getting ready for the night, so you could then focus on her. 

She sat up against the headboard, Your giant phone–– compared to her hands–– held in her tiny ones.  You were looking through her duffle bag for her pyjamas when you heard…

“Look Mimi, I saved you chicken”, her small teeth bared, holding up a piece of her chicken from dinner. Your phone is now being propped up against a pillow. 

You looked up to watch her pull a piece of chicken from her...pant pocket. 

That was the point you reavulated yourself as a parent and had to think about what kind of kid you and Harry were possibly raising. 

“Harry!” you called for him.

He walked out, an eyebrow quirked.

“Look.” you hiss, voice low.

‘God…’ Harry thinks. “Where’d she get that chicken from?” he asks, running his towel over his hair. 

“Her pocket! Why are you so casual about this?”

“Angel...you had a baby with me, what’d you expect?” he questions, seriously questions you this.

“You’re fixing it then, Mr. mini-me”

-

Presently, you’re all at the beach. Three towels and three umbrellas lay in/on the sand. You’ve rubbed sunscreen on Ava twice now and have had to remind Harry three times. After last time there was no way you’d be rubbing aloe vera on him all night. 

“Baby you’re dripping it.” You sigh, reaching over to wipe her chin of the chocolate ice cream she was eating, from a cup you might add. “Do you want me to feed it to you?”

“No, thank you” she replies, kicking her feet out. 

You’ve all swam a bit, but now are on a mini break from the water and saw they were selling ice cream close by. 

It’s pretty quiet between the three of you, too busy enjoying your treat. 

She gasps, “Daddy you’re a fibber” Ava says indifferently, slurping even more of her ice cream from her spoon.

He guffaws, caught off guard from her statement. He shifts towards the two of you. The way the wind blows his hair and the sun makes the green in his eyes even brighter catches you off guard–– the sight of his abs doesn’t hurt either. 

You also knew it wouldn’t be long until his hair gained some highlights and his freckles would be more prompt. You couldn’t wait.

“How’m I a fibber, messy?” squinting down at her.

“Look!”she points, “There’s a puppy right there” 

There is, you turn your eyes to where her fingers point to see a woman walking a black Dachshund.

Harry turns his head towards him, a sad look on his face. “You’re right baby. I’m a fibber. I’m sorry”

Ava hurls from her seat to latch her arms around his neck, “It’s okay daddy, now Mimi can come next time” she tells him.

If there’s one thing about Ava, it’s how much she hates sadness. Unless it’s from her. Then it’s perfectly okay. She hates sadness so much, she particularly had a dislike for the character from Inside out. Until you had to explain to her how sadness is something that is okay and needed from time to time, Like in the movie.

After her round of affection towards Harry, she emplaces herself into his lap.

“Daddy. Mommy.”

You both hum an answer. 

“It looks like a hot dog” she eyes the dog while it trots down the sand. 

“It does huh?” Harry answers, brushing her flyaways back. All while you laugh into your palm.

Your hands feel tingly when you wrap it around Harry’s neck, pulling him into you. His head lays against your shoulder. 

Definitely a vacation to remember and cherish.

-

if you enjoyed pls don’t forget to reblog or give feedback if ur up to it <3

[yandereloversblog]

FNAF: Security Breach↴

͟͟͞͞➳ＭＡＳＴＥＲＬＩＳＴˏˋ°*

•I know all I write is yandere but sometimes that topic is less focused when I write about certain themes

•Just so you know: You will NOT take Bonnie and Foxy away from me- I have versions of them both in this for self indulgence-

[Gregory scenarios are purely platonic because so help me if anyone requests otherwise 🔫 😀]

╰─▸ ❝ 𝙺𝚎𝚢 ❝ ↷

💛 -> 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜: Non romantic relationship with character. Can be family or friend oriented.

💚 -> 𝐇𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭: I can not write angst so this is the best you'll get from me. Not specifically yandere focused.

💖 -> 𝐅𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐲 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐑𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜: Focused less on yandere themes, and more on the fluffy part, but the dark love is there just not that evident, I need to write some healthy romance from time to time.

❤ -> 𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬: Not full on NSFW but definitely something that alludes to it or hot make out sessions

💜 -> 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐆𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐇𝐮𝐫𝐭: [Y/N] or your self insert getting hurt or in worst cases, dying. Mostly for when it's actually written out and not just mentioned. I rarely like writing this but it will be included in most cases. Some may not like fics where the darling gets hurt so this is a warning.

🖤 -> 𝐆𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐕𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞: When you can't write fucking but you can describe a body being mauled and how the organs slip out. This is a warning for anyone who doesn't want that.

↳ ˗ˏˋ 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 ˊˎ˗ ↴

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐞

-> Romantic Headcanons

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩/𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩

-> Quiet and affectionate Darling 💖

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐃𝐉 𝐌𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐜 𝐌𝐚𝐧

-> Running into scrapped Animatronic Darling

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐨𝐫𝐲

-> Reader who's his best friend and parental figure 💛

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝐘𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐀𝐥𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐭 |

-> Glamrock Freddy

-> Glamrock Chica

-> Roxanne Wolf

-> Montgomery Gator

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝙶𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚙 |

-> Darling on her period 💖

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝙶𝚕𝚊𝚖𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚔 𝙱𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚒𝚎, 𝙶𝚕𝚊𝚖𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚔 𝙵𝚘𝚡𝚢 |

-> Treating their Darling differently while she's on her period

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝙶𝚕𝚊𝚖𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚔 𝙵𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚍𝚢, 𝙳𝚊𝚢𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝙰𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 |

-> Darling with a son

-> Darling offers that they stay with them

-> Detective Darling

↳ ˗ˏˋ 𝐎𝐧𝐞-𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬 ˊˎ˗ ↴

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝙶𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚙 |

-> Story - Spoilers

↳ ˗ˏˋ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐬 ˊˎ˗ ↴

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐠𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐆𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫

-> Suitor ➤ “No fucking way. There can’t be another person after them.”

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩/𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩

-> Secret Admirer ➤ “It’s been so hard to watch you from afar, and know that you’re completely blind to my love. But now I’m brave enough to kiss you, to touch you, to love you.”

↳ ˗ˏˋ 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬/𝐈𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 ˊˎ˗ ↴

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝐑𝐨𝐱𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐞 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐟, 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐠𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐆𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫 |

-> Singer Snake!Animatronic Darling joining their team

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩/𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩

-> Darling being perused by another yandere

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐲, 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐨𝐫𝐲 |

-> Yandere duo after Darling 💛 [Because Gregory is included]

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝙶𝚕𝚊𝚖𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚔 𝙵𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚍𝚢, 𝙳𝚊𝚢𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝙰𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 |

-> Darling coming back after they die 💜

↳ ˗ˏˋ 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 ˊˎ˗ ↴

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐲

-> Engaged Darling

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐑𝐨𝐱𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐞 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐟

-> Masochist Darling 💜

-> Egotistical Darling

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐠𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐆𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫

-> Masochist Darling 💜

╰┈➤ . . . 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩/𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐩

-> Engaged and Pregnant Darling 💜

-> Darling is in love with them

-> Oblivious Darling comes back from vacation

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝙶𝚕𝚊𝚖𝚛𝚘𝚌𝚔 𝙵𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚍𝚢, 𝙳𝚊𝚢𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝙰𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 |

-> Darling suddenly quits 💜

-> Sweet Darling with a cult

-> Darling adjusts to their new life

-> Humanoid!Robot Darling who's a nurse

-> Meeting their Darling's boyfriend

↳ ˗ˏˋ 𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 ˊˎ˗ ↴

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐞, 𝐆𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐅𝐨𝐱𝐲 |

-> Their dynamic

╰┈➤ . . . | 𝐆𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐩𝐬 |

-> Best and worst yanderes

-> Their Darling wearing red lipstick

-> Who would want a pacifist Darling

-> Who would like a motherly Darling who spoils them?

[hopeyallenjoy]

First time

Tell me the truth Severus. Don't you want me?

Pairing : Young Severus Snape x Fem!Reader 

Warnings : slights smut ; severus switch and reader switch ; dom/sub kink ; little bit of swearing ; alone at house ; bathroom teasing 

Wordcount : 3,504 words

Request : Marauder era Severus x reader’s first time 

Resume : That’s the same request as “An eventful birthday” but I did it with a more bold reader and only Severus' first time. Hope you’ll enjoy it just as much ! 

Y/l/n = Your last name Y/n = Your name 

"She asked you what?" said Lucius as he and Severus headed to their common room.

"She invited me to come spend the weekend at her house over the vacations," Severus repeated, rolling his eyes to the sky.

"Tell me mate, you've been dating Y/l/n for how long now?" Lucius as he opened the door to their dormitory.

"9 months." he replied.

"And you've already gone beyond a simple kiss? You know, despite what they say about young wizards, it's the young women who are the most hormone-driven. Think about it, Severus! That's why they're all so obsessed with love. They need a man and they need him to be their own to calm their ardor. And it's even truer for the veela.”

Severus shook his head negatively, setting his things down on his bed. Lucius couldn't help but smile mischievously at his friend.

"What are you getting at?" he asked when Malfoy didn't continue.

"My point is that she didn't invite you to chat. She wants you, Severus Snape, the dark male, to take over and make her your bitch.” Severus widened his eyes, not expecting such a revelation.

Was this really the case? You were a former student of Durmstrang Institute who had arrived at Hogwarts at the beginning of seventh year even though you were already of age. Because of the reputation of your former school, rumors about you had spread within a week of school, claiming that you were an accomplished black mage or a monster from the darkness, a cross between a veela and a vampire. You ended up in Slytherin, which wasn't entirely in your favor. You even had to deal with the most popular students in the school who were self-appointed protectors of Hogwarts and wanted to check the rumors.  Luckily for you, you were persuasive. You weren't a dark mage or a monster, but you had learned enough from Durmstrang to stand up for yourself and stop anyone from stepping on your toes.

After your little show of strength, girls started coming to you when a boy bothered them and guys who thought they were irresistible, like Lucius Malfoy or Sirius Black, came to try their luck with you. You'd packed them all, one by one. None of these boys were interesting for you, you only had eyes for your Potions and DADA partner, Severus Snape, the only one who didn't ogle your form even when he thought you didn't see him, the only one who shared your curiosity about dark magic, and especially the only one who didn't seem to be interested in you. That's what you liked about him, he really wasn't interested in you, or at least not more than in friendship, until you spent more and more time with him and finally confessed your love. 

In fact, you didn't really do that, you two just kissed on a full moon night in the astronomy tower and it was so natural between you that you just started acting like a couple. Holding hands during Hogsmeade outings or during classes, kissing for hours in your common room while all the other students were watching Quidditch matches, taking turns reading  poetry under the moonlight every night or so. In short, everything was done in a natural way, without the need for embarrassing confessions or the obligation to call each other ridiculous names. No, you had no obligation to each other, you just saw other as you pleased, doing the things you liked and it was just... perfect. 

The more Severus thought about it, the more he thought how stupid it would be to change that.

Add sex to such a perfect relationship? No way. It wasn't that he didn't find you attractive, on the contrary, he simply found you breath taking and sometimes wondered what such a beauty was doing by his side but he wasn’t sure that sex was for him. Sex was always something you grow tired of, and there was so much about it that he didn't know, he was sure he would disappoint you if you ever introduced sex to your relationship. Everything Severus Snape knew about sex, Lucius had told him, and if there was one thing he had learned from his friend's stories, it was that sex was complicated. 

Then when he presented himself in front of the door of the manor Y/l/n, he was well decided to keep his pants on. He knocked and expected to see one of your parents open the door for him, but he came face to face with your little face when the big door was fully opened. His eyes didn't leave your face but his peripheral vision allowed him to see that you were dressed a little lightly for the season, a simple t-shirt pulled over your tantalizing curves. He swallowed hardly. Keeping his pants on seemed much more difficult now. 

"Hello, Sev'. I see you're still on time. You'll excuse me, this time it's me who's a little late." you gave him your best smile and invited him to come in "My parents aren’t here so I took the opportunity to sleep in a little longer.”

Well, that wasn't entirely true, but he didn't need to know that, did he? You'd been up for a while and had spent the morning getting ready for the special weekend ahead. Despite the blasé expression you wore, inside you, your hormones and your heart were racing. Your little Severus was just beautiful and you were even more aware of it now that you saw him without his school uniform.

“Do you mind if I go put something on quickly?“ you asked without noticing the gleam of desire in the eyes of your companion. 

He shook his head negatively too happy that you propose of yourself to remove this angelic vision of which he had difficulty to get out. Merlin what you could be beautiful. You left to change your clothes after taking him into the great hall. Severus was trying to calm his imagination as he gazed out at the garden of your house that could be seen from the living room window. He was still standing there when you returned from your room, looking so absorbed that you had to pull him by the sleeve to get his attention. When he turned around he was breathless again. You had changed but your new outfit didn't help his case at all. You were now wearing a flowing black knee-length dress with a white corset that showed off your slim waist and gently carried your swaying breasts. If he was to believe what he saw, you weren't wearing a bra and he hoped... no panties either. 

"Severus...are you okay?" you questioned as he said nothing.

Severus quickly pulled himself together, serving you one of his grinning smiles that only he had the secret to. What was he talking about? Wasn't he the one who wanted to keep your relationship simple and natural? As recently as thirty minutes ago? And now he was the one who imagined you fucking on the floor, after having torn off your little black dress. This weekend was getting more and more complicated for him. He nodded nevertheless seeing the worried look that you threw to him, the back of your hand put on his forehead as if to see if he had a fever.

"Are you sure? You're all red?" he took your hand, squeezing it gently.

"Yes, yes. It's just your beauty that bewitches me," he said, placing a light kiss on your hand.

It was your turn to blush. Severus' compliments were rare and always came when you least expected them, so when he complimented you, you took full advantage. You kissed him tenderly.

"Idiot. You scared me."

He savored her words in turn, still not used to someone worrying about him and showing it.

"I should scare you more often if you kiss me like that every time" he murmured a sneer stretching his lips.

"You know very well that I would kiss you every day like that even if I wasn't worried. You just have to ask me or... do it on your own.”

At the fiery look you gave him, Severus stiffened and looked away a little.

"Do you have a chess set? It's been a long time since I've played against the grand queen of chess," he said in an attempt to divert your attention.

This worked in part, you nodded and went to get your chess set and then you sat down at the small table near the window. It was a hectic late afternoon of battles and verbal jousting, all of it friendly and good-natured. Even if your thoughts were turned to the particular behavior of your boyfriend. You wanted to wait for him to come and explain to you on his own what was the problem but you were sure he wouldn't. You didn't embarrass him with a serious discussion though, not wanting to spoil the wonderful weekend ahead. And you were right. Severus, on the other hand, was having a hard time concentrating, with hot scenarios taking up all his attention. If you had always been a bit daring, he had never noticed before, too busy admiring your little face or your knowledge of dark magic. And now he was biting his fingers, having the impression to rediscover the wild beauty that you were.

Laughing loudly, arm in arm, you entered the kitchen, your bellies rumbling. You brought in the leftovers from the night before and you gobbled them up in a few seconds, neither you nor he being picky in terms of food and it wasn't as if you had eaten mud, quite the contrary. 

It was your father who had made the food the day before. He had deliberately prepared more food than he needed, not wanting to leave his princess without food during the long weekend he was going to spend away from you.Because yes, you had fought for your parents, especially your father, to leave you at the mansion alone. Yet they knew you could handle yourself, after six consecutive years at Durmstrang, it was rare not to know how to handle yourself. 

The meal was just as nerve-wracking for Severus as he couldn't help but make you laugh which made your breasts jiggle under the thin fabric of your dress. You even bent down to grab the pepper on the table which allowed him to see that you were indeed not wearing a bra. He almost choked, his imagination and hormones still running wild. By the end of the meal, Severus was convinced that he was going to lose his mind before the end of the weekend if it continued like this.

"Y /n, could I know where the bathroom is? I'd like to take a shower before I go to sleep, if that's possible," Severus asked, convinced that a nice cold shower would put his mind at ease.

"Oh, of course. The bathroom is upstairs. It's the first door on the left. Do you need me to lend you something? Slippers, a nightgown?” you asked as a particularly Machiavellian idea appeared in your mind.

At this point of the evening, you had understood that your boyfriend, who you thought was so innocent, had started to understand that you were no longer a child and that your body was indeed the one of a young adult. Seeing him almost choke at each movement you made and that revealed a little more of your forms, was, it had to be said, a most amusing spectacle. So you let him go up the stairs to the bathroom and slowly followed him once the plates were washed and put away.

Meanwhile, Severus had slipped out of his black clothes and into the bathtub, which was filled to the brim. It wasn't every day that he could afford a nice hot bath and he was sure you wouldn't mind if he took a few drops of the Muggle lotions that adorned the rim of the big tub. He slipped all the way into the water, after a deep breath, desperate to calm his ardor. If Severus Snape was so determined not to give in to temptation it was mainly due to the bad treatment he had received from the Marauders, humiliating him to the point where his body was dripping and he was unable to touch himself, even alone. So how could he have succeeded in maintaining a carnal relationship with anyone? Love, love was different, he felt it and managed to express it, but sex? Very little for him. Finally, this afternoon spent by your side had shown him that even if the thing seemed inconceivable to him, he was still capable of desiring someone. And to want you, he wanted you really bad. He opened his eyes, his head still immersed in the bathtub, and saw through the water a figure towering over him. He emerged from the water recognizing your little face. 

There you were, standing in front of him, you had left your corset behind and were now wearing only your black dress. Your face was still impassive.

"Y/n? What the..." he began.

"Sev', do you love me?" you didn't let him finish, starting your Machiavellian plan. "Because I'm starting to doubt it, you know? You've been acting weird ever since you got here. So tell me the truth, Severus. Don't you want me?" as you spoke his words, you let your robe slip off at your feet showing yourself completely naked to him. 

Severus could not believe his eyes. In that moment, he couldn't stop his eyes from devouring you, his cheeks from turning red, and his sex from growing. The fire that swept over him was so sudden that it took his breath away. You were satisfied with your little effect, but when Severus didn't move, just clung to the edge of the tub, you slid as sensually as possible into the bath without taking your eyes off him. Severus watched you, holding his breath. Yes, you were definitely going to drive him crazy. 

"-Severus, how do I look?" you asked again as he still hadn't said anything.

"Y/n... You don't know what you're saying. I... I want you so much, you can't even imagine how much but..." Severus was short of breath, "I've never done anything, never even t-touched myself. I wouldn't know how to... I wouldn't know how to do it and I could only..." you cut him off, kissing him gently as tears of frustration flooded down his face.

 You felt a little bad now that you knew the truth. You had never wanted to made him cry but you understood that he needed to cry so you let him, kissing his cheeks, his nose, his eyes, in fact, everything that was within your reach, wanting to reassure him a maximum.

"Shhhhh Sev'... It's okay, don't worry. I'm here.  Shhhhhh... Oh boy ! I could never be disappointed in you, Sev' I assure you. So please don't cry anymore. I hate seeing you like this. I love you so much, you know." you continued to kiss him with your arms around his neck.

"I-i love you so much t-too ," he replied between sobs. 

Severus was drowning in your affection, his whole body burning. He felt so good in your arms, covered in your kisses. You covered him with tender kisses for another moment, telling him how beautiful he was in your eyes between two kisses. Once the sadness passed, he wanted to return your affection, covering the zebra skin of your breasts with soft kisses which felt like butterfly wings. Then the butterflies became more urgent as your hand clung to his ebony hair and your lips let out sighs of pleasure. You pulled your lover's face up to steal a passionate kiss, your two foreheads finally pressed together, your body slightly elevated as Severus had his arms around your waist.

"Do you... do you want to go all the way Sev'? I certainly don't want to force you to do anything you don’t want, love."

How? Weren't you supposed to not give him ridiculous nicknames? I don't remember saying that. Severus nodded, pulling you tighter against him.

"Guide me, Y/n," he breathed.

His voice was infused with desire, as was his entire body. He was overflowing and tense with desire beyond your touch. You placed his hands in the places you knew were your pleasure points, guiding him to know what to do. His lips came to rest on your neck as you told him to, as your hands slid gently through the cool bath water to land on his crotch. It may have been hard to believe but Severus Snape was very well built, his sex was moderate in size but not all the way down, his base and glans were wider than the rest. It was also slightly curved towards the glans. If you hadn't already had other relationships you wouldn't have realized just by touching him, that Severus was just perfect for you. Your fingers began to do him good, drawing grunts from him that made your skin tingle as he didn't stop his attentions. When you felt him grow a little larger in your hands you stopped your stroking, spreading your own legs just enough for him to enter.

"Severus... I want to cum with you..." he understood the invitation taking his sex in his hands and positioning it facing the entrance to your pussy. 

He didn't really know what to do once he entered so it was you who guided him again, initiating back and forth, impaling yourself a little more each time, your hands resting on his shoulders. Severus moaned with each return, feeling your insides react to his member. You weren't especially tight, but he was still able to fill you up completely. You guided him for a moment and then he felt confident enough to take over. Slowly but surely, he varied the strength of his thrusts. Then he added his lips in your neck making you plant your nails in his shoulders when a so good and... unexpected pleasure. Instinctively, he squeezed you tighter as the last thrust inside you came accompanied by waves of immeasurable pleasure. He had finished before you but you were so close to cumming that you couldn't stop a groan of frustration from coming out of your mouth.

"This one is different from the others. Did I hurt you?" Severus fretted as he came to stop, causing you to let out another frustrated moan.

"No, no, no ! I... Can you go on a little longer, please? I'm not far..." you whispered in his ear. 

He undulated his pelvis gently under you, a sneer coming to perch on his lips.

 "What exactly do you want, Y/n? I need you to explain it to me precisely, please. I don't think I'm experienced enough yet to understand your demands without you finishing your sentences," he said, kissing your temple. 

He knew perfectly well what he was doing now. You wanted to protest by realizing it but it had started again to undulate under you, letting out of your mouth only words drowned between your moans. He ended up kissing your temple again, letting you breathe and waiting for your answer. 

"I want you to fuck me until... Until I cum Severus, please!" you finally managed to articulate making Severus' smile grew wider and wider.

"Gladly, love," he replied as he began to pound you again. 

[godlytransurfer]

HOW I MANIFESTED MY FIRST SP AND FOUND THE POWER OF IMAGINING AND PRAYER - PART 2

(PART 1 HERE)

At this point I was cackling in my head. All the good feelings and scenarios I had visualized were so factually, objectively true. Reminding you, I was a kid, I had no idea of what this would mean about my power later in life, but I knew God had amazing ways, and I was interested in learning them all.

I did date my main SP for two weeks or a bit more, but after a while I did start to think as a person, although he was very dedicated and sweet, absolutely obsessed with me, he wasn’t exactly what I wanted in certain aspects. It wasn’t anything he did that was inherently bad, just what me and my friends assumed of some ways in his personality that weren’t so in flow with mine. As for his other friend, we were friends and bonded over drawing and so on.

I unfortunately decided to break up with my SP, as I also decided to induce new changes in my life, aka my parents moving to another place. As soon as this happen, I didn’t exactly have the assumption that he would take it well, so he didn’t. He was angry but I understood it was because he was very heart broken, as I realized this was how you could completely consume someone’s mind. I always assumed I was the best, so that was the inevitable truth. As soon as this happened, his friend decided it was a good idea to try to hang out with me more often. I was flattered because I was so loved, but for some reason something in me told me it wasn’t worth it to insert myself in this any longer. I had gotten to understand the ways of god Anyways and I got to meet them. It was good enough for me, specially as someone who was soon moving. The next school year, he ended up failing a subject so he was put in the same class as I was supposed to be. He became friends with one of my guy friends, and my poor friend was always going back and forth to deliver me his messages because he was STILL obsessed with me. I then later realized this was a very strong thing we could create with our imagination, even though it felt so weird to feel the end of bonds with people. In a way, I could sort of feel the pain others felt when I left them over the years I learned to do this. I also realized the reason he even probably ended up in my class was something my subconscious did for me, in case I had stayed in that town. After that, I still occasionally went there for vacation to hang out with friends, but I was scared he was gonna find me irl and say some wild stuff, I was feeling bad and embarrassed, because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. Because I focused on that so much, he did actually pass the same street as us one day. But because I told myself we would both normally move on and that he was going to be okay, he didn’t even have the guts to look at me and kept on walking. As a socially anxious person at the time I was very relieved neither of us went crazy.

Now you might ask me, why are you telling us a story of literal middle school times, what about now? What about 3P situations? Well here’s the thing people... it’s not as different as we like to think it is.

As I grew up and kept living my life, although I am extremely picky, I quickly assumed this was a thing that would always work, and that no matter who I saw or what was going on, as I asked god and swore he heard me, something always happened throughout those situations where my targets got their way completely cleared and became absolutely obsessed with me. It was like being a star, it felt amazing, specially at an age where so many people feel self conscious. I’m not gonna lie, I was always a stubborn person for the things I wanted. I had a lot of “audacity”. I quickly decided to celebrate myself, tell myself I was gorgeous, smart, the most interesting, and I would dress myself up as my own dream girl and do my hair, color it, whatever made me feel like I was THAT GIRL. That was basically kept the same for all my life. If there was someone else in the way, I always told myself I was better and that no one could compete with me. If I was insecure, I would tell myself I was loved, and that no matter who showed up as perhaps almost being “better” than me, I told myself: IT DOESNT MATTER. Because if I desire it, it means it desires ME. It means it’s FOR ME. AND NO ONE ELSE IS ME. So the funny thing is that we use beauty and hobbies to feel good, we use many things perhaps. But it’s not even that that makes us special and interesting, although it can seem like in in this material world. It’s because you believe you are what you want to be. That’s how you convince yourself, and how you convince others. I always still thought I had a few flaws but that despite them, I was still the one and only.

As I am now a young adult, I never really had many problems with SPs because I’ve learned this very young. However, I am a perfectionist, even if I learned to develop compassion for myself. Because of that, the few times it didn’t work for me, it was most likely because I was dissatisfied with myself even when I saw them completely head over heels with me. Or when I started to get dissatisfied about sharing my interests or lack of them, or thought about my success in jobs or school. Also I then started to realize just because I could get most of the people I wanted, it didn’t mean they were all people I would admire to have as a partner. Then I became more “closed off” until I found individuals with characteristics that rang a bell to me. This was obviously before I literally realized what law of assumption concretely was, or who Neville Goddard was. I just believed in god and had huge faith. I believed in a good happy ending for me. Now after the law I have 2 main SPs. I have many guy friends just because I’ve always felt comfortable with them, and it allows me to get to know them properly before I decide on anything, besides the assumption world. If I don’t want them as lovers, they are still amazing friends to me. My first SP I created from scratch, and although I don’t put him on a pedestal I love him to pieces because he just hits so precisely on everything. He even knows of the law. So everyone, if you think creating people from scratch is a lie, remember: for me that became one of the easiest things to do. You can even watch movies like Ruby Sparks if you doubt it. I can make people even remember me from things that literally “never happened” and prioritize a bond with me just because of it. I assume it’s burned in their minds. It is that easy. As for my second SP, I have been involved with him. Usually I wouldn’t have 100% gone for him, as there were some boxes that weren’t initially ticked, but I will be honest here, I did it because I found out you can revise and change certain aspects of individuals and I was eager to test it out. Please if you are doing something like this, make sure you have the persons feelings into account and that you will treat them well. Remember that although they were generated by you, they are still human beings. Don’t fall into the trap of disassociation with that one. I had to fight some resistance and change the old story, but I know regardless, that god hears me and he hears you. Things will always work out if you allow them to. The point of telling you this extensive story of my experiences, is the following: Believe God, yourself, your subconscious has heard you, no matter what. It will clear the path and make a way out of no way. Even if there’s no void methods involved. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to be chosen. It will never matter what’s out there that seems to intimidate you, because you are it baby. It is for you, and NO ONE ELSE WILL EVER BE YOU, AS THE HUMAN YOU ARE CURRENTLY.

[hihopelessromantics]

This is EXACTLY the part I was referring to but OMG I forgot it looked like THAT. his FACE. NOOOOOOOOO.

Why previous human friends!! How could you treat our boy this badly?

He asked for help at one time and did not receive even an Attempt to reassure him that he was worthy to receive the time and effort that he puts into his friendships??? WTF. Do they not subscribe to the BASIC laws of friendship??? Did our boy Meliodas not have any REAL friends for 3,000 years until he met the sins 😭 Your average middle schooler on level 3 friendship knows better SMH.

NOT ME RELATING ON A PERSONAL LEVEL TO THE SINS.

I would have fought friend’s parents at 12 years old upon request even tho they loved me. Apparently they always asked my mom if I was gonna be there when she wanted to hang out with our friend squad because ? they didn’t trust the others? Bastards put waaaaay too much pressure on her… gonna cry because you only got a 96 and your parents will ‘kill you’? gonna tell me they said you ruined their vacation and that they yanked on your hair??? Constant comparisons to family, calling you fat and ugly, yelling over the smallest things? Well I’m gonna care about it. How do you NOT care about that? I was writing passionate persuasive letters to them for years. Legit trying to convince them to idk??? Be better to their child?? My bestie absolutely did NOT deliver them lol. My dumbass did not know how to best support her but HELL IF I DIDN’T TRY! Even asked my school counselor about it at one point. That little visit ended up causing a misunderstanding that contributed to her pretending I didn’t exist for the next three years (god damn do things happen in high school…) but that’s what can happen when you’ve been basically emotionally abused and you can’t trust anyone and some shit you won’t explain just went down.

In my case I didn’t have any magic shenanigans I could use to show how much I loved her and help her deal with whatever hell she was going through in her personal life. I couldn’t do anything.

The sins felt like they COULD do something for Meliodas. So OF COURSE they wanted to do that thing. Meliodas went “so hey (fucked up scenario) happened and I’m gonna deal with it alone. Cut you outta my life in the process. Gonna become the Demon King. I know I said I was terrified of doing that and it was the last thing I wanted (and I hate myself so much) but you’re overreacting. I’m totally fine with this course of action.”

And the sins responded, “no. no that’s not fine. I would NOT want to put up with that if I were in your shoes. I’m horrified and concerned. Maybe, maybe you’re being logical about all this and we’re not. But HELL. We love you too much to just stand on the sidelines. You may have hurt us but that won’t stop us from, at the very least, trying to understand the choices you’re making now. We are not going to switch to hating you. And we are not going to stop trying to be there for you.” As a young teen I would have said with full confidence that THAT IS JUST WHAT FRIENDS DO. That is what people who love each other so much, despite all their differences, will do. Try to help in their own messy, imperfect way.

But apparently a lot of people just. Don’t naturally think like that, or try to, when it comes to their friends? ☹️ sad sad for everyone involved. *concern for strangers intensifies*

This is why “power of friendship” stories are so good. It’s sappy but friends really are all that. And it’s SO real and complicated. In real life sometimes all you have is that love in your heart, the desire to see them happy, but you don’t actually have the ability to fight whatever’s actively causing them pain. All you can do is try to be there for them but you wish you could DO something more, be a better friend to them, anything to combat the sense of hopelessness you feel when you know the world isn’t as kind to the people you love as it should be. And you don’t know how to make them happy. You just want them to be happy. And you’re thinking, isn’t love action?

10/10 would do what the sins did. In real life you never get a chance to just. tackle a source of a loved one’s pain head on by beating it into the ground with the strength of your feelings and your resolve. Your friend genuinely seeming to not understand how much they matter, how loved they are? One of the worst person to person experiences ever.

“It would be better for you if you didn’t care so much” - an ex best friend. A throwaway line about our friendship in the school hallway, the gist of which haunted me for years. I hope she’s going to be okay.

seven deadly sins chapter 242

[anlian-aishang]

Listen, okay, I know this sounds weird and it probably is but HEAR ME OUT. I am on a vacation with my boyfriend and his family right now and the mind is wannnnnnndering. I can’t help myself okay so here we go.

Summary: It can’t be delayed any longer: the time has come to introduce Levi to your parents. You have no idea how it will go, but still, the truth remains: It can’t be delayed any longer.

Word count: 4000 Tags: levi x reader, fluff turned smut, modern AU, fem!reader

Time on the dashboard read 4:45 PM. Taking in the sights of your hometown, it seemed you would arrive right on time - as always - in the most important of moments.

After many months of dating, you were finally introducing your boyfriend to your parents. You would have liked to delay it even longer, but there always came a point when your parents’ suggestions implicitly became demands. Until recently, you had put off their introduction again and again, but with their increasingly frequent calls and texts, your autonomy was being put to the test. Besides, the last thing you wanted to do was make them think you were hiding something - that there was a reason you did not want them to meet.

In fact, it was completely the opposite. Levi Ackerman, your new boyfriend, you thought him the best around. To show him off to anyone and everyone was an easy sell. Sure, you were still in the first-year honeymoon period, but both of you would have been lying if you said you did not feel very serious about the other. You had not yet admitted it to each other, but the thought of marriage had crossed both of your minds, was dwelling in his. That said, of course, being married - or even engaged - without this parental milestone, you were sure your mother would send you to an early grave. Before your relationship could reach its goal, it had to take the steps to get there. Even if it meant dragging your introvert to your hometown for a weekend at your parents’ makeshift bed and breakfast, well, he always said he would do anything for you. In more ways than one, your relationship was being put to the test.

Even up till now in the car ride there, you had not asked him how he felt about the excursion. It was not that you had not thought to do it, but rather, a combination of many reasons not to. You could already imagine the conversation:

Are you nervous? No, why would I be? I mean, they’re my parents. … And? Well, what if they don’t like you? So? … What are you gonna do? Break up with me or something?

It was then that you stopped yourself. Not only did these thoughts do no good, but they were especially harmful this close to the destination. Turning onto your block, things looked both so different and so familiar all at once. It was time to orient your headspace and that meant shoving out the imagination of the worst-case scenario.

As the sun continued its journey from east to west, you drifted your gaze to the driver likewise. A dark sweater overtop and a light ironed dress shirt underneath. Cotton neckband peeked out of the cashmere collar. Charcoal sleeves, rolled up at the elbows, revealed pastel cuffs curled over. Black jeans, cuffed at the bottom, made his legs look longer, showing one inch of matching patterned socks. For this occasion, you had not told him how to dress, but as with so many other things, he just knew.

Maybe it would be fine. No, you corrected yourself, it’ll be great.

// // //

Thanks to your dad working in the garage, eye contact was first made through the glass windshield as you pulled in the driveway. You could not remember the last time you felt so nervous to see him, not since you brought home that one report card or knocked over the inherited vase. In a last-second frenzy, your mind raced over ways to get out of this. A fake stomach ache, forgetting your toothbrush, maybe you could just jut the car in reverse yourself.

Instead, your guest made a swift exit. Turning the key, unbuckling his seatbelt, he let himself out and pivoted to your side. One firm hand on the handle and one on top of the frame, he tugged your door open and took your hand in his. For a second, your eyes widened and jaw hinged, but you quickly snapped them shut. You did not want to give it away, but this gentlemanly gesture was a rare luxury. Looking up to meet his gaze, you caught a glimpse of something more. Don’t be so nervous. I know what I’m doing. A relieved grin, you pulled yourself up from the passenger seat and - with a new skip in your step - made a brisk carefree pace to your dad.

Your greeting was typical, but with a tinge of mutual excitement. “And this is - “ you opened up to your side, but your guest was not yet there. Back at the car, the trunk was propped open as he unloaded all the luggage. Whoops. You had forgotten about it but maybe that was for the better. His backpack around his shoulders, your bags tucked under his arms and in his hand. Fingers turning white were his only sign of struggle, his step remained steady and his expression relaxed. Watching him carry your luggage, your father gave a series of subtle nods. Unbeknownst to you, your mother gleamed from inside the house and through the kitchen window. Dressing up for dinner, holding the door for you, now bringing in your belongings - your parents had already been impressed even before “hello.”

The way that your dad towered over him had you feeling slightly nervous - as if you were introducing your high school boyfriend or prom date. Levi, on the other hand, showed no signs of intimidation. A firm handshake, modest smile, and “nice to meet you” all made the model first impression. Beneath the shadow of your hair, you smiled to yourself, That’s not quite how ours went.

Brief pleasantries and talk of the weather - you deliberately saved the real getting-to-know for the dinner table - afterward, your dad took a few strides towards the car, eyes scanning carefully. Even though Levi had only just met him, it was obvious to more than just his daughter: he was in admiration of the ride. Taking in its pristine reflection, he asked, “You wash it yourself or take it in?”

“Myself.” Levi affirmed, “I don’t trust anyone else to do it right.”

Though he had simply spoken the truth, it had already earned that hearty chuckle from your father - one you had not heard since the last time you were home. He pointed a finger towards your date and nodded, “I like that, Levi.”

Just as Levi has read his body language, it seemed like your dad understood his as well. Sparing him the hand clamp on the shoulder, giving you a sigh of relief, he instead gave one keen grin before turning around and leading the way inside. “Let’s head in. Dinner should be just about ready.”

The second his back turned, you snuck Levi a quick glance, It’s going well already.

Curved smile and a tilt of his head, I know.

// // //

At the front door, opening to the kitchen, you met your mother’s attention. In a split second exchange that only a mother and daughter could have, you conveyed your love for him, she conveyed her approval of him. All throughout your life, she had never let you forget how wonderful you were, how smart you were, how beautiful you were, how you deserved the best man on earth. With that one look, you both spoke silently, He could be the one.

Not as subtle, though, was her greeting. Skipping past you and to the new guest, she called, “Levi!” If the smile on your mother’s face was not wide enough, her volume was an indicator of her enthusiasm - loud and clear. “It’s so great to meet you!”

Without a thud, Levi set down just enough luggage to meet another handshake. Two oven mitts made a sandwich with his hand. If he was clammy, she would have no clue, but with his composure, it was clear he was in smooth sailing. A smile wider than the one he had greeted your father with, he chimed his reciprocation, “It’s great to finally meet you, too.”

Their smiles were contagious. Watching your two worlds combine so seamlessly, you never imagined it would go this well. You could not have made it go so well, even if you tried.

But that was the thing: while he was being so prim, proper, polite, it was also evident - he had not faked a single part. He may have had a dirty mouth and sense of sarcasm when you were in private, but today came as a pleasant reminder - he was truly a gentleman through and through. Sure, your parents had their quirks - you had complained about them plenty of times - but the fact was that if not for them, he would not have you. The least he could do was be a good guest which, for him, came effortlessly. Like most things, you smirked.

“Well, Levi, I hope you’ll enjoy dinner tonight. I figured, ‘what better than the family recipe when to get to know the family?’” Your mother’s glee was without bounds. You flickered your gaze and twitched your lips, a nervous neutralizer to her naivety.

“Smells great, I can’t wait to try it.” That kindred tinge to his voice, you thought to gape over your shoulder. Instead, you ground yourself, furthering the facade that he was always this warm.

“Well, Levi, that means a lot coming from you!” You swore, you had never seen your mother cook with such tempo. “My daughter tells me you’re quite the chef!”

A single breath chuckle made your heart skip, “Really? She’s never told me that.” An elbow perched on the counter supported his slight lean, “No matter what I make, she always says, ‘my mom makes it better’.”

Two unison laughs from your parents, you bit your lip, This is going so well. Your dad noogied your head as he joked, “She’s a handful, isn’t she?”

Still angled against the countertop, Levi divided his attention carefully. His words spoke to your parents, his wink to you, “A handful indeed.”

// // //

Setting the table, refilling the drinks, even insisting on doing the dishes, Levi had gone above and beyond throughout the whole night. With eyebrow raises and plenty of thanks, through both body and spoken language, your parents’ approval was spelled out for both of you. Of course, you had been on pins and needles the entire time, but Levi’s innate courtesy took the edge off, to say the least.

Sweet dessert and candy wine wound you down along with the time. From the first eye contact to small talk, from 5 PM to midnight, this had all gone better than anyone could have planned. As they discussed his line of work, congratulated him on status, your gaze drifted from your empty glass around the room. All was sound except... Eyes widened at your baggage still flattening the doormat. You choked on your own breath, Of all the first impressions they could have of him…. being a slob? No one - not you, not them, least of all him - could live with that takeaway.

Clearing your throat, “Ahem - Levi, darling...” your princessy tone was a deliberate choice, implying that you always lived like one, “would you put those in my -” you corrected yourself, “in our room?”

Since you moved out, your childhood bedroom had been turned into a guestroom. When your parents phoned you and asked - once again, one of those suggestions turned demands - you gave a reluctant yes. Now that your significant other was spending the night, though, you were thankful that they had taken the initiative: exchanging your twin bed for a queen and your teenage posters for floral paintings. Sometimes, you shook your head, parents really do know best.

“Oh my gosh! Look at the time!” Your mom exclaimed, “You two must be exhausted after all that driving.”

“Yeah, of course!” Even your dad’s voice began to boom, “Get some sleep. Hot breakfast and coffee first thing in the morning! Wouldn’t want to miss that, right?”

With a turn of his head, Levi exchanged a quick glance with you, an unspoken, What do you say?

As smoothly as it had gone, the night was ending likewise. You would have to do it all again tomorrow, but it seemed neither you nor him had any qualms about that. In fact, you sparkled, knowing that each second spent together was one more that they would get to know and love him - one more step towards So, when is the engagement? The wedding? The house? The kids?

As you had shooed away the spiraling thoughts earlier, you did so again now. The last display of composure was merely this walk to the bedroom. The end in sight.

Signing off on the first night, Levi followed your lead as you stood from the table, “Yeah, we are pretty tired. We probably should head to bed.”

“Thanks so much for coming over!” You giggled at your mother’s giddiness, never having once left throughout the whole night, “We’ll be better hosts tomorrow and actually show you the house, huh?”

“Please.” Through combed bangs, his steel eyes shined, “The pleasure was ours.”

// // //

Behind closed doors, you at last had full reprieve to be yourself - no longer an audience to impress, you finally felt at home. Without shame, deviant eyes drank up the dark sights. A stupid smile on your face, a long-lost sense of teenage rebellion revived as you ate up the eye candy. By a grip at the middle of his back, Levi tugged his sweater off and over his head, forcing his hair to fray, coercing a few tired shakes of his head back and forth. Slender fingers worked his buttons, slowly revealing his chest, rising and falling with tired sighs. Unbuckling his belt, stepping out of his pants, you admired every inch of him that you had not yet already.  

As he threw his arms into the grey cotton long sleeve, he took a moment before putting it on. A smug, “Can I help you?”

You smirked, nibbling on your fingertip, “I’m just fine, thanks,” you sauntered closer, pressing one hand to his pecs, an elbow hooking around the back of his undercut, “and so is my boyfriend.”

A blend of mocking and appreciation you only heard from him. Sneering, “You embarrass me, you know that?”

Nail outlined his muscles, happy that he still had not yet donned the garment, “You did good out there today.”

Placing his hand atop yours, he pulled your touch up, off, away from his chest. “Let’s do even better.” Keeping hold of your hand, he dragged you both onto the mattress and underneath the sheets. Tugging the loose strands from your face, he gave a light kiss on your forehead and spoke against your skin, teasing through a whisper, “Be a good girl and get some sleep.”

// // //

At your side, his breathing slowed as he strayed off towards sleep. For you, the opposite. Heart racing. Sweat forming. Ache throbbing.

You could not put a finger on what it was. Whether it was how perfectly he dressed, how perfectly he had conducted himself, how perfect he was today and every day, you could not tell the primary source of your infatuation. Perhaps all of his ingredients had comprised one dire cocktail. As much as he charmed your parents, he did you even more. The same bedroom where you dreamed of finding your Prince Charming, you were now in that same bedroom with him. All of it had set you off, hormones raging just like they had back in their heyday. Your body moved - both as if not your own, but also in the purest form of yourself. Palms pushed yourself up from the mattress, legs swung to his sides, hips found his and ground against them as you buried your face in his neck.

Of course, he already knew what you were doing. And of course, he should have known, you would do it at a time like this.

“Really, brat?” He scoffed. In the dark of night, his exhale on your lips tickled even more than usual. “Tonight? Of all nights?”

You lowered yourself even further, pressing your bodies together from chests to calves. Fingers dove into his hair, lazily tugging his ear to your mouth as you whispered, “I can’t help myself, Levi.”

That much was obvious. Clearly, you had turned a blind eye to such a stupid risk. Objectively, your hosts were just a few dangerous stretches away. However, your vision was clouded by an increasingly unignorable lust, obstructing your sight to only the dark black gap under the door and the handsome man beneath you, tainted in obsidian by your hovering shadow. You could see only those two things, and in your short-circuited mind, they told only two things: you had privacy and passion both in arms reach.

You let your desire speak for you, telling both yourself and him, “It - It’ll be fine.”

// // //

Such an empty lie, such a possessive thirst, they were the only things that could bring you to the scene you had set for yourself now: grinding against your boyfriend during your weekend back home.

Dragging your hips back and forth, you were thankful for the uncharacteristic choice to pack a nightgown. Rather than the thick cotton flannel of pajama pants, underneath your skirt, thin silk panties made direct and demanding friction with his hardening member. Hands cupped around his shoulders - fingers clenching, nails digging - as you strove for any source of support through each and every building wave.

He would never instigate at a time like this, but at the same time, he would never hold back when faced with his sex kitten. Hands snaked from their hold in your hair and caress at your nape - down past your waist, hips, and lower back - until finding the peak of your cheeks and squeezing them tightly. His knuckles turned pale as he savored your feel. Your mouth agape as you submit to his vice.

That hold on your ass, he never let up. Instead, he tightened even more, garnering leverage to encourage your oscillation up and down his length. Was he increasing his pleasure? Yours? Both? In this darkness, you could not see that far ahead. Taking up all your thoughts now, was only the fun you were having at the one time you were supposed to refrain from it.

He had the same thought. To get off at a time like this, your drive must have been unbelieveable. Certainly, in your typical frame of mind, you never would have chosen to do this here and now. His mind began to wander, just how madly you must have been in love with him, sending his libido skyhigh with yours.

Wafting against your neck, a breathlessly amused and enamored sigh, “You like that, huh?” Levi reached a hand down to your sex, pulling your panties and his underwear down to your ankles. Without any layers between you, your pleasure amplified immensely, along with it, your cries.

“Ah ah ah,” He warned, his whisper impossibly light. Perhaps you had forgotten about the danger lurking outside, but neither his awareness nor his control ever wavered, not even in the hottest of heats. In one swift motion, Levi stretched his forearm in alignment with your spine and cradled the back of your head in his hand. Thanks to his muscle, even as he rolled you both over, the crunch of the mattress and sifting of sheets were barely audible. With the role reversal, you instinctively clutched his back and whimpered.

Levi pressed his lips hard and fast against yours, effectively silencing you. Tongue swiped at your lips, demanding his entrance. Teeth grazed your tongue in guidance, preventing those troublesome sounds. His muscle reached just above the back of your throat - the perfect location to block those noises without the threat of your choking. Steady palm caressed your cheek, relaxing. Careful thumb rubbed your face, settling. Slowly, he pulled from the kiss to a distance just close enough - you could hear even the faintest intrigue from his depths, “Can you be a good girl?”

With your saturated gaze and vulnerable tone, you promised your best and begged, “Y-Yes, Levi…” You moaned, “I will be a good girl for you.”

It was as if you had signed a contract. Only with the promise of your best kept silence would he provide the pleasure that made you scream. A half-hover over you, Levi placed himself perfectly between your legs. Arms at your sides. Hands beneath your back. His leaking tip lined up to your dripping arousal - both just like and unlike it had so many times before. A few preliminary thrusts, he knew he already had your consent, but he could not help but ask once more. A bite on your ear, smooth lips soothed it with a purr, “You ready, princess?” 

If his goal was to keep you quiet, he should have known better. Not only did you nod - and nearly squeal - but you wrapped your legs around him, beckoning for that specific proximity and angle. Within the short stretch that your eyes could see, you easily made out that trademark stare of his. One brow arched, half-shut eyes peeked to you, barely parted lips revealed a smirk that checked, You sure you want to do that?

But clearly, you knew what you wanted and would do anything to get it. It would be wrong to deny you for a single moment further, for each second was one more that your passion yearned so much that it hurt, one more that you could be walked in on, one more that the risk increased.

In case your using him as a toy, your vehement asking, fuck - even your phermones, were not enough, the feeling of your sex showed your hand. The warm and wet of your walls coated him entirely on only the first thrust, such that he could fuck deeper and deeper, faster and faster right from the start. Now, you were not the only one who could not contain yourself. In fact, you wondered, maybe you were handling it better than him.

His abdomen flexed, chest heaved, veins protruded, “Fuck…. F��Fuck me….!”

In missionary, he liked to spice things up - hair pulling, nipple pinching, neck sucking, ear biting. Tonight, though, he was utterly incapacitated. Maybe it was heightened sensitivity in the pitch black night. Maybe it was the feeling of your sex. Maybe it was even the release of those ropes and reins. After being tied up and restrained all night, he was finally set free. Not only that, but you had been the one to both link those chains in the first place and also the one to cut them off at the end of the night. The change had him riled, and after such a trying day, there was not much more he could take.

Who would have thought, the day he met your parents, that you would be the one keeping him on his toes? His pace became erratic, and thus, so did your screams. In that instant, you forgot where you were entirely. But even in the throes of it, he did not. Your instinct was as it always was - to tell him when you were close. But as your back arched, lips parted, scream brewed, his instinct was just as alert. Even as his own orgasm began to take control from him, he first took care of you. Hot hand clamped around your mouth, muffling your helpless blend of gasps, moans, and shrieks.

Pulsating pleasure interrupted his sentiment, but with his hand silencing you, it was conveyed all the same - if not better. “Shh’hh!” His breaths were cut off in rhythm with each filling shot you felt within. In a debate for what to say - shut up, keep it down, be quiet, and many more - his sentences were instead an incoherent mix of syllables, all of which felt kind on your ears regardless. Even for someone so perfect like him, his mind could become clouded every once in a while, especially around you.

Finally, you had found the man you deserved.

// masterlist //

[sero-pairo]

While We're Young

by Forgotten_Words44

Dabi agrees to join Shoto and his friends on their gap year as a 'parental figure' on the condition that he can also bring some of his friends along. Three hundred and sixty-five days of watching out for freshly graduated, hormone-ridden teenagers may be harder than Dabi realised, but with his boyfriend and best friend by his side he's sure most of the shitheads will be alive by the time the year is over; worst-case scenario they're missing a limb or two.

* Multiple POVs, only one in each chapter.

Words: 1661, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: F/F, F/M, M/M

Characters: Dabi | Todoroki Touya, Takami Keigo | Hawks, Midoriya Izuku, Todoroki Shouto, Bakugou Katsuki, Kirishima Eijirou, Ashido Mina, Sero Hanta, Kaminari Denki, Shinsou Hitoshi, Toga Himiko, Uraraka Ochako

Relationships: Dabi | Todoroki Touya & Takami Keigo | Hawks, Eventual>, Midoriya Izuku & Todoroki Shouto, Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijirou, Ashido Mina/Sero Hanta, Kaminari Denki/Shinsou Hitoshi, Toga Himiko/Uraraka Ochako

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Road Trip, gap year, Hot Springs, Flirting, Angst, Fluff, relationships, Aged-Up Character(s), tododeku - Freeform, POV Multiple, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Quirks (My Hero Academia), dabihawks - Freeform, Travelling America, Teenage Drama, Flings, One Night Stands, kiribaku, Summer Vacation, Summer Romance, Pet Names, Crushes, Eventual Smut, Rough Kissing, Neck Kissing, Making Out, Truth or Dare, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

from AO3 works tagged 'Ashido Mina/Sero Hanta' https://ift.tt/GWXNrUs via https://ift.tt/rKFSdM5

[brywrites]

Focus II

[Part I] If you’re looking for something to distract you from the looming anxiety of election results, here’s something else to focus on for a few minutes. ;) This was definitely longer than I thought it would be! CW for mentions of triggers/flashbacks, mild smut!

Summary: Reid faces unexpected challenges returning to the field after his reinstatement, but the Reader remains the one person who can help ease his mind when it all gets to be too much.

----------

For once, the world has chosen to be gentle with them. Following Scratch’s demise, the Bureau mandates that the BAU takes six weeks of leave. It comes as a relief to all of them after living in a constant state of anxiety for the last year. Rossi disappears on a vacation that includes visiting Ringo Starr, who he reminds everyone is “a close personal friend.” JJ stays at home with her boys, happy to be nothing but “mom” for a little while. Tara fits in research, Luke goes camping with Lisa and Roxy, and Garcia divides her time between MMORPGs, her grief group, and babysitting Hank Morgan.

Y/N spends a good amount of the time on Emily’s couch, watching old seasons The Bachelorette and whatever 2000s rom-coms they can find. But when she’s not at her best friend’s apartment and she isn’t at home attempting complicated recipes in her kitchen, she’s with him.

Spencer is spending a large portion of his break attending mandatory therapy sessions and redoing fitness courses in Hogan’s Alley in order to meet his reinstatement requirements. But whenever he gets the chance, he’s by her side. They get coffee and wander through museums and parks, they go for long drives and make out on his couch. They talk about everything and nothing and all at once it’s wonderful. There is a strange giddy feeling that takes her over every time his hand finds her in a crowded place or he goes out of his way to do something nice for her or he can’t help but smile while kissing her. He’s so gentle with her, leaving sweet notes around her apartment and burying his face in the crook of her neck as he holds her close.

There are no cases. There are no monsters. There are no press conferences. There are only warm days and wine and the sound of Spencer’s laugh echoing in her living room.

With two weeks to go, she realizes the world might not be quite so gentle. She swings by the BAU to help Matt move case files out of her office, and as she’s on her way out she spots Spencer at the end of the corridor, rubbing at his eyes the way she’s only seen him do the night Scratch stole Emily.

He doesn’t even seem to register her approach until she says his name. And when he turns to her, he’s miles away. “What is it?” she asks. “Spencer, what’s wrong?”

“The scenario I was running in the Alley… there were multiple unsubs in the laundromat and it was just – it was too much like – it was…” He presses his palm into his eye.

Too much like Luis. He’s told her that story already. “What do you need?” she asks. She reaches out to grab his hand, lacing her fingers through hers.

She feels him tense for just a second before, squeezing her hand tighter, he starts down the hall with her. The door to Garcia’s office is open and he pulls her inside, shutting it behind him. Before she can ask what he’s doing, her back is against the door and his mouth is on hers.

He kisses her fiercely and when he slips his tongue past her lips, she wraps a hand around the back of his neck to pull him closer to her. He’s still holding her hand, his grip tight as he rolls his hips against her and though it’s caught her completely off-guard, the feeling of his body against her is exquisite.

She winds her fingers in his curly hair, eliciting a moan from him that rumbles through his chest. His free hand slips down the curve of her back until he can cup her ass. He catches her bottom lip between his teeth. Every action is hungry, desperate. Her skin feels hot everywhere he touches her.

He stops suddenly and wraps her in a hug. His sweater is soft against her cheek and he smells like ivory soap and coffee and his embrace is so secure. This is a different kind of passion – less frantic, but just as strong, as he rests his head on her shoulder and attempts to steady his breathing.

“It still works,” he sighs.

“Hmm?”

Spencer releases her from his arms. “When it gets bad, and my mind goes… there, your touch helps keep me here. Everything else just disappears. I can’t explain it, but it still works.”

“So… kissing me is a like a grounding technique?” she asks, trying to surprise a giggle.

He chuckles in spite of himself, and the distance in his eyes is gone. He is himself once more. “Something like that, yeah. It’s pretty amazing actually. Even just holding your hand helps. But um, kissing you is…” He clears his throat. “A little more effective, it seems.”

“Well,” she says, “I’m certainly happy to be of assistance.” She gives him a quick peck.

“What am I supposed to do in the field?” he asks. “I’m still having flashbacks and even a basic training exercise triggered a trauma response today.”

“Love, you’re a genius. You know that PTSS is like an injury. And that means it’s gonna take time to heal. But you’ll find a way to cope and stay grounded while you heal.” She caresses his cheek, the stubble he’s continued to grow rough against her hand when he leans into her touch. “Even if that means sneaking off to a back room with me,” she teases.

Their time of rest is coming to a close, the hours ticking by until the day they’ll return to work and Spencer will face his reinstatement evaluation. She savors the quiet while she can, the ability to go to bed early and sleep in, the simple joy of waking up in her own bed, or sometimes in his. She can tell he’s anxious though – scared that he’ll be denied reinstatement and scared that the trauma will continue to hang heavy over him.

When it gets bad and his mind steals him somewhere far away, he reaches for her and she always welcomes him. She’s grateful for any reason to be close to him, and if it helps to keep him here in the moment, that’s even better. She can always tell when he needs her to clear his mind by the way he kisses her. When he’s not himself, he pins her against the wall, gropes at her ass, holds her face still as he bites her lip. He’s impulsive and needy. But when his firm grasp fades to soft caresses, when he places kisses on her cheek, her forehead, when it becomes a sweeter sort of passion, she knows he’s come back to her.

So when Emily announces his reinstatement to the team and she kisses him quickly and his hand squeezes hers just a little tighter than she expects, she knows there’s something bothering him. They grab their go-bags from the bullpen and she asks him about it, but he just kisses her forehead and promises that they’ll talk later.

Emily goes over the case on the plane, women in caregiving roles stuffed into suitcases. The team goes over victimology and she tries to take notes, already thinking of questions to ask the families and directions to take with local media. It’s easy to get lost in the work when it demands her full attention.

.

Upon landing, there is already a couple waiting for her in the interview room. Laura Westin is their latest victim, and her parents are devastated. They paint a picture for her with their words of their daughter – a bright, beautiful, generous woman who was mourning the death of her own friend. The grief has traveled in waves.

“Who would do this to her?” Mrs. Westin sobs. Her husband places a hand on her shoulder. “She’s such a good girl, she is – she was… Oh, god!”

“She was,” Y/N repeats. “And she is always going to be your daughter. And the people who love her will remember all of the good she did.” They cry and she listens and she assures them that they’re doing everything right and while she knows not to make promises she can’t keep, she does promise that they’ll do their best.

When they’ve shared everything they know and settled back into a state of relative calm, she walks the Westins to the door of the station and returns to conference room, where the team is working on the profile.

“Welcome back,” Rossi says. She sits down next Spencer. It’s clear to her that he’s lost in his own thoughts. Out of the corner of her eye she sees his fingers form a fist and he begins to bounce his leg under the table. Their chairs are close together already, making it incredibly difficult for anyone else to notice that she reaches across beneath the table to rest her hand on his thigh. The moment she does, he stills. He inhales sharply and clenches his fist a little bit tighter for just a moment �� but then relaxes. She strokes steady circles with her thumb while she tells the team about Laura Westin.

They team files out of the room for a quick break and she stays behind with Reid. He’s relaxed enough to give her a smile. “How was interviewing the family?” he asks, lacing his fingers through her own.

She sighs. “It never gets any easier. But I know it’s important for them to get a chance to talk to someone about her. Someone who won’t tell them it all happened for a reason and she’s in a better place now.”

“You’re so good at that,” he says. “You always make the people around you feel better.”

“What about you? What’s going on in your head?”

He stares down at his coffee cup. “There was a… condition for my reinstatement. For every one hundred days I’m in the field, I have to take thirty days off.”

“Like a sabbatical? Does Emily know?”

“Yeah. She thinks it’s a good idea.” He aimlessly strokes patterns on the back of her hand.

“I know I’m not an expert, but I think she might be right,” she says. “Spencer, what you went through – you’re going to struggle. And you’re going to need to rest.”

“I know,” he says. “But Y/N, I’m worried that–”

“Y/L/N!” Alvez’s entrance startles them both. “There’s a reporter for the Daily News out here. Sorry,” he adds, noticing Spencer’s hand still holding hers. “He’s, uh, trying to call this guy ‘The Baggage Claim Killer.’”

“Of course he is,” she sighs, rolling her eyes. “Thanks, Luke. I’ll go talk him down. And we’ll talk later, okay?” she tells Spencer. Though the man in the lobby is annoying, wrangling a reporter is far easier than talking to a grieving family. It doesn’t hurt her heart to lay into someone trying to profit from another person’s pain, and she’s always been good at using her kindness to guilt trip them.

.

That evening at the hotel, there’s a knock at her door. She knows who it is even before answering it and his face is a welcome sight.

“I missed you today,” Spencer says, closing the door behind him.

“I missed you, too. I like you much better than those reporters,” she says. She takes a seat on her bed, patting the spot beside her. “But we didn’t get to finish talking earlier. What’s got you worried?”

Spencer plops onto the mattress, heaving a sigh. “I’m worried that maybe I’m not ready to be back in the field.”

“Do you not want to be?”

“I do! I do, I just…” He runs his hands through his hair. “I wanted to kill Scratch. You know that. And I would have if Emily hadn’t stopped me. Just like I would have killed Cat and just like I almost killed the guys at Milburn…” His hands are shaking so she reaches out to hold them. “What if this is who I am now? What if the next time I’m face to face with an unsub I just…”

“You won’t.”

“You don’t know what I did in there… what I had to do…”

He screws his eyes shut and she knows she’s losing him. She kisses his cheek, because she wants him here and she wants to be close to him and she hasn’t been able to hold him all day. It’s a mutually beneficial situation, she figures, when his mouth finds hers, and he kisses her so deep she thinks she might drown in the feeling. His hands slip under the hem of her sweater and his fingers are so warm against her skin. She tangles her hands in his deliciously unruly hair and tugs, needing him closer, wanting to keep him grounded.

“You’re here,” she murmurs. “You’re right here.” His hand is on her breast and his lips are on her neck and she tries so hard not to moan. The last thing she needs is for a team member to walk past her room and overhear them. He sucks hard enough at the skin of her collarbone that she knows it’ll leave a mark. She captures his mouth once more, and he pulls her down onto the bed so she’s lying on top of him. When she’s kissing him, she can forget too. She can erase, for a brief moment, the fear that she’ll let those parents down. That she’ll say the wrong thing or overlook a rogue reporter. She can stop worrying that she’s not doing enough to get justice for those women for just a minute, because when he holds her she doesn’t have to be a perfect liaison or have all the right words. All she has to be is in this moment with the man that she loves. It’s all he needs from her and he is everything she needs right now.

She swipes her tongue over his lower lip before pressing kisses down his jaw. Her hands work away at the buttons of his shirt as she goes, carving a path with her lips down his chest, the soft skin of his belly. He bites back a groan but she can feel how tense he is still, his breathing shallow. It occurs to her that being back in the field might be making things worse than usual. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to take things a step further. He needs her, and god does she want him.

She shrugs out of her sweater before flicking open his belt buckle and undoing the zipper of his pants, pulling them down his legs. His cock is already straining against the fabric of his boxers, and when she drags a finger over the length of him he presses his hips into her hands. They haven’t gone this far before. Her heart beats out a staccato rhythm of anticipation as she reaches for the waistband of boxers.

But this his hand grabs hers, his grip soft but firm.

“Y/N.” He’s not looking past her anymore. Spencer’s hazel eyes are completely focused on her, shining in the dim hotel lamplight. “I don’t want my first time with you to be like this.”

“I don’t mind,” she assures him.

“But I do,” he says. He sits up on the bed, holding her in his lap. He brushes her hair back from her face, letting his touch trail down the side her face to caress her cheek. “I want this, but I – I don’t want you to think for a second that I’m using you. I want to do it right. You’re not just another pretty girl or a way for me to clear my mind or a distraction. You’re my favorite person. You’re the one I love. And Y/N, I want to love you the way you deserve to be loved.”

“You do,” she says. How can he possibly think he doesn’t when he sends her pictures of things he finds that will make or smile or reads her favorite books just to memorize the words she loves or holds her as though nothing so precious has ever been within his grasp before?

“I need to prove it to myself though.” And though she doesn’t quite understand, she relents. But when she asks if he wants to be alone, he says, “Can I just stay here? With you?”

“Of course.” She trades her slacks for a pair of pajama shorts and asks, “So you do think I’m a pretty girl though?”

He laughs. “The prettiest. But you know that already.” She curls up under the covers with him and watches him fall asleep with his arms around her. His breathing steadies and in sleep he looks more peaceful than he has his days. His body relaxes. A small smile graces his face. Like this, she can almost pretend that Mexico never happened and nothing ever hurt him. She loves him in all ways and all parts, even when he’s hurting, but she wishes she could take that pain away from him.

.

By the time she arrives at the unsub’s house with Rossi, Luke is leading William Lynch away in handcuffs and Spencer is walking the survivor to the meet the medics. Once she’s in the ambulance, Y/N meets him on the sidewalk.

“I didn’t hurt him,” he says.

“I knew you wouldn’t.” He pulls her into a hug, and to her surprise, there is no tension in his touch. He’s not far away. He doesn’t need her to keep him in this moment. He just wants to hold her. She rests her head against his chest, relishing that simple fact.

That week, she can see a lightness in his step at work. His smile comes easier and stays a little longer. He seems to be finding his footing in the office and with the team once again, and he’s even excited about the prospect of the seminars he’ll be teaching. The weekend is welcomed with a Friday night dinner at Rossi’s, after which Spencer drives the both of them back to his apartment. When she steps inside, she finds the living room lit up with string lights and her favorite flowers sitting on the kitchen table.

“What’s all this?” she asks.

“For you, Pretty Girl,” he says. “I told you I wanted to do this right. Flowers have been a symbol of romantic love for centuries, particularly when given as a gift, so that was obvious. And dimmed lights are typically used as a way to set a romantic mood, although also have a skill for lighting up the life of everyone you meet, so there’s that too. Maybe that doesn’t make much sense,” he says, laughing at himself. “But I wanted to make it clear that I was thinking of you and I wanted to make tonight special. Not that anything has to happen tonight, of course, but if you still wanted to I just thought that maybe, well–”

“It’s perfect,” she assures him. “More than perfect. I love it. I love you. And this is exactly what I want.” She stands on her toes to kiss him before he can start rambling once more. Spencer leads her to the bedroom and unlike the rush of movement and need in Florida, he knows exactly he wants. Every kiss is languid and longing, every touch so precise and electric. He helps her out of her dress and places kisses between the valley of her breasts, the curves of her hips. He lets her guide him to where she wants him most and responds to every cue she gives him. Every inch of her body is given careful attention. As if he needs nothing from her at all but to love her.

It’s so much more than sex. As much as she hates the term making love she doesn’t know what else to call it. Because in every gesture, every kiss, he tells her without words that he loves her. And with every touch she tries to tell him the same. He devotes himself to ensuring she comes first, and makes good on that promise with ease, but when he finally reaches his release the sound of him crying her name is the holiest benediction she’s ever heard.

It takes him several minutes after to regain the ability to form words, during which she lies there in contended bliss, stroking his hair. “I love you,” is the first thing he says. “I love you, Pretty Girl.”

She smiles to herself, delighted to be not just a pretty girl who steals his train of thought, but his pretty girl. The one who gets to stay by his side and take his breath away and push the nightmares back. “I love you, too.”

“I’m so glad you kissed me that day.”

“I’m glad Emily gave me such an outrageous idea,” she giggles.

“Thank you for being patient with me all this time. I know I say that you help me forget, but it’s more than that. You’re the one who helps me remember who I am and what matters. But I love you for so many more reasons than that. I’ve asked a lot of you lately and I want to make sure I make you feel as loved as you make me feel.”

“Spencer, you asked me to kiss you. That’s hardly a burden. And I like listening to you. I like being with you – because you make me feel so loved, all the time.” She snuggles closer to him. “I like you like this, when you’re sweet and gentle and you. But it’s, um, it’s not a bad thing when you lose control a little bit. It’s sort of hot – to feel like you just can’t help yourself.”

He raises his eyebrows. “Well, I will absolutely need to remember that. You know, it scares me sometimes, how much I want you. How much I love you. But I’d much rather be scared by that than by the person I am without you.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” she says. Because they’re both better when they’re together.

He makes her brave. She gives him strength. They change each other for the better, and as the days pass, the world feels a little lighter again. The sabbatical proves to be a good idea. With rest, with time, with therapy, she watches him heal. He doesn’t need to run off to kiss her hard against a wall to keep himself grounded (though when she’s in a certain mood, he’s more than happy to). He can focus in the field without her by his side. But when he’s having a hard time, his hand will still find hers. He’ll stand a little closer to her, and look at her, letting the rest of the world fade away, and feel better, every time. And there’s nowhere else she’d rather be.

[tarteausuga]

The Bubble Tea Chronicles - Yuta

CW: fluff. Yuta x she/her reader

WC: 1561

Summary: in which Yuta works at a bubble tea cafe and develops a crush on one of his regulars.

A/N: this was actually adapted from a WIP I have for Johnny but the scenario I had for Yuta is basically the same.

"Jasmine milk tea with grass jelly please." A familiar voice said, accompanied by the usual reusable cup and straw. Yuta looked up and confirmed who it was, her voice was like music to him after an image lunch rush.

"Half sweet, less ice?" He asked.

"Always." She smiled.

"This one's my treat." Yuta smiled

"Thanks Yuta." She grabs her drink and leaves to return to work.

"Have a good day." He smiled at her with sparkling eyes.

It was the same thing everyday at the same time. She always had headphones hanging around her neck that she removed from her ears the moment she entered the shop. She always ordered the same drink in her own reusable cup. During the winter, she would get it hot. She was always wearing all black but in ways that made her seem classy and elegant.

"Are you going to ask her out any time soon?" Winwin pokes at Yuta as they clean up from the lunch rush.

"She's dating someone." Yuta sighs.

"Of course she is. You always fall for the ones you can't have." Winwin chuckles as Yuta lands a punch on his arm. "Hey that's harassment!"

"Is it actually if you're my best friend of 10 years?" Yuta smirks.

He wasn't wrong though. Yuta has the tendency to become infatuated with the idea of someone long before he actually has a chance to get to know them on a deep level. He would say that he knew y/n for about a year now but in reality, he knew nothing about her.

---

The next day, Yuta was on his own for the lunch rush. Winwin called in sick and no one else was available to take his shift. By the time y/n walked in, Yuta was ready to collapse.

"Hey, is everything okay?" She peered up at him with her dark eyes.

"Yeah, Winwin called in sick and no one else could cover." Yuta sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. "The usual?"

"You don't have to today if you're tired." She insisted.

"No, no. It's on the house today." He takes her mug and starts to make her drink.

"Yuta you don't-"

"Please, you're the nicest person that's spoken to me today and you're honestly the highlight of my day." Yuta admitted in his tired state before realizing what he was saying.

"Sorry, I didn't catch that last part." She stood on her toes to look at him over the espresso machine.

"Oh I just said uh my day wouldn't be complete if I didn't make your drink." Yuta choked on his words.

"You're the best, Yuta." She said after sipping her bubble tea.

"Have a good day, y/n." He said to her as she walked out the door with a chime.

He was ready to collapse but he felt lighter after seeing her smile. He always smiled when she did but it quickly faded when he realized he couldn't do more for her than make her drink. As he was about to sit down for a break, the door chimed again and he saw y/n back again.

"Did I make it wrong?" He panicked.

"No, never." She assured him. "I just got you some juice and bread though I realize now this is redundant because you have this stuff here…" she trails off.

Yuta smiles, thinking how cute she was before taking the offerings and thanking her. "It's the thought that counts, thanks."

"I just wanted to pay you back for the free drinks over the past few months. You also give me my toppings for free and I don't know how you know I like pudding but it's a nice surprise and… Ugh I'm rambling. Thanks." She quickly smiled and left again.

---

"No bro, I'm glad you didn't come in. It was awful and I wanted to pass out but then she came in and oh man she's surprisingly cute." Yuta said to Winwin over the phone.

"Can I stay home tomorrow then?" Winwin joked.

"I will end you." Yuta responded seriously.

"Aww man I thought y/n softened you up so much." Winwin laughed.

"I will come to your house and drag you out if you're not at work tomorrow." Yuta hung up.

The door chimed and Yuta looked up to see a red-eyed y/n. "Hey Yuta." She forced a smile. "Mind if I just hang out here for a bit?" She retreated to a table in the corner.

"Is everything okay?" Yuta brought a glass of water to her.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks." She smiled again while sipping the water.

"Let me know if you need anything." He put a hand on her shoulder which caused her to burst into tears. "Oh my god I'm so sorry, did I hurt you?" He kneels down to try and look at her face.

"No. No, I'm fine." She says between sobs, "I'm just having a bad day." She tries to laugh.

"You don't have to keep pretending like you're okay. Not with me." He says quietly to her. Looking around, he noticed most of his regular patrons had vacated the cafe out of respect. "I'm going to close up for the day. Do you want to help me? Keep your mind occupied for a little bit? No pressure, just get up when you're ready."

"Don't close, I'll just leave." She tries to get up but she's unsteady.

"It's been a long day. I want to go home anyway." He said as he eases her back into the chair. "Take your time."

The closing duties usually don't take him that long but today he wanted to stretch them out as long as possible. He counted everything multiple times, peering up to look at y/n every time. Slowly, he noticed that the more he counted, the more she started to perk up. Before, she was hiding her face in her hands or in her arms as they laid on the table but she progressively moved to looking out the window with her head perched on her hand. Finally, he looked up and saw her starting longer staring at him, startling him.

"You know for a scary looking guy, you're not that scary." She said.

"Look who finally stopped crying." He smirked at her.

"Do you want me to start crying again?" She pouted.

"No, you can help me wipe down the tables though." He tossed a towel at her.

"Are you going to pay me?" She caught it and took the spray bottle from the counter.

"Yes, you can have anything and everything you want from my display case. Take them or Winwin will take them home for his roommates." Yuta motioned to the treats behind glass.

"I accept." She smiles and begins to clean the tables.

Yuta watches for a moment, admiring her with her sleeves rolled up and hair pulled up into a ponytail.

"You're experienced. Way out of my pay scale." He laughs.

"I worked in a restaurant all through university. They even asked me to be manager but I wasn't interested." Yuta wasn't surprised. She had a natural sense of leadership to her. No matter where she went, there was a light that seemed to follow her.

"You could be the manager here so I can get a day off once in a while." He joked.

"I wouldn't mind, you deserve a break." Yuta gaped at her for a moment before she added "I'm serious! As long as I get to take home the cakes at the end of the day."

They continued to clean in silence for a few moments before she broke the silence. "How long have you worked at this place?" She leaned over the counter and watched him.

"Just over 4 years." He said with furrowed brows as he carefully wiped his baby down.

"That's quite a long time."

"I started working here as soon as my parents let me. I've been saving for my own cafe since then. The owner was retiring and had already finished paying the place off so he offered it to me for really cheap. When I turned 21, I signed the papers and here we are." He exhaled.

"What did you go to school for?" She asked.

"You ask a lot of questions." Yuta leaned across from her.

"It's my job." She shrugged.

"What do you do? Why do you wear all black?" He raised his eyebrow.

"I'm a recruiter. And I just like wearing black to work. It looks clean, put together."

"And are you going to tell me what made you so upset today?" Yuta attempted.

"Can I just have my cake and bubble tea?" She pouted.

"Yeah, you can." He didn't pry any further, "you don't have to smile all of the time."

"Thanks Yuta." She said, her usual bright smile fading to reveal a small glimpse into her soul.

Silence fell back over them as she watched Yuta pack up her wage for her work before they stepped out. "Do you want me to walk you home?" He offered as he locked down the shop.

"I'll be okay. Thank you for the offer though." She stood on her toes to give him a quick peck on the cheek, "and thanks for the food." She smiled before walking away, leaving Yuta to wonder what had happened that day.