#Best DID Provider

[ratatatastic]

If you could be anyone of your teammates who would it be and why? Panthers Cut.

[maharellasa]

me selecting a lavellan inquisitor who romanced solas and promised to save him during the story selection mode in cc

[dykedvonte]

Honestly I see Jimmy's refusal to put Curly out of his misery less about his weird feelings of envy or his delusions but the fact Curly is all but stated to be a shield to Jimmy from his actions and people seeing the worst in him.

The only characters that Jimmy really interacts with one on one before the crash are Curly and Anya, two individuals he has wildly different relationships with. It's likely that Curly really did most of the talking between them as the pilots and the rest of the crew as staff. They didn't know of Jimmy's more reprehensible behaviors cause they never really had the chance to and Jimmy is subconsciously aware. If they had disliked him more than Anya would have told Swansea earlier or even Daisuke when things got really bad.

It's why he takes the immediate opportunity to blame Curly; He's the shield. He's saved Jimmy's ass more times than he can count and more times than Jimmy would ever admit. Even when he can't really do it anymore, he mentally shields himself from his own faults by putting Curly between them. Letting Curly die puts too much on him because he doesn't know how to function without a safety net.

In the end Curly only lives because Jimmy needs the idea that Curly will inevitably make things better to stay alive, meaning Curly has to live, no matter how much it pains him to do so.

[xamaxenta]

@jaditestuff ty for your commission request, i swear to god i tried so many iterations of adding in yoru and i really couldn’t figure it out im super gomenasorry i hope shanks looking handsome and holding hawky is enough to distract you from this error of ways 🥺🙏🏽

[rottenteeth]

Science time with Rottenteeth!

To preface, DID is a trauma disorder just as PTSD is a trauma disorder, there is just heavier compartmentalization. Also there is nothing wrong morally with not wanting to, not having the resources to, or not being stable enough to recover. That isn't what this is about, its about the harm some people are causing to themselves unknowingly. My goal is education and harm reduction.

(Long post but many resources at the bottom)

Every system is different because everyone's trauma is different. This however, does not and will never apply to the treatment of dissociative identity disorder. There are 2 options if you want to recover and process trauma to the fullest extent. Being a functional integrated system and final fusion. These require the same treatment; stabilization, processing trauma, and the breaking down of dissociative barriers.

This means alter separation and the encouragement of treating them like genuine people, is counterintuitive to said path. Using people based language is not wrong, but genuinely believing you are multiple people will make your life much less functional. If you treat alters like separate people even with this knowledge, that is your decision and may be the safest option for your current situation. But it can and will make the future much harder.

Telling people with DID- a disorder that makes you disconnected from reality and fantasy prone- that a fully functional life and stable mental state is possible while "being multiple people" is not okay. Me and these other misinfo blogs aim to show people the true reality of this disorder and its treatment.

You wouldn't tell someone with PTSD that if processing trauma makes them feel bad then they don't have to process it to have a healthy life. You wouldn't tell someone with schizophrenia that they should embrace their hallucinations and treat them like they're real just because they feel real. Nor would you tell someone with depression that doing nothing and withdrawing from social interaction is helpful and a healthy path just because it feels the least taxing.

So why is it okay to endorse alter separation when we know that more alter separation=more dissociative barriers=less trauma processing? Why do we want people to not properly process their trauma?

Just because someone is more comfortable with the idea of being separate people (which occurs so that one can disown their trauma and emotions) does not mean it is a healthy recovery path. This disorder makes it so that "being multiple" is the most comfortable because that's what made life somewhat livable. That doesn't mean it's good, recovery will never be a happy comfortable process, it is a challenging and grueling process, it always has been.

It is okay to not be ready to accept alters as part of a whole, it is okay to feel scared when acknowledging that those things happened to all of you. Sometimes treating parts like people is a stage in the stabilization and trauma processing parts of treatment.

What isn't okay is making people think that treating yourself like you are multiple people in one body is a healthy thing long term. You are allowed to do so and my aim is to only educate these people about the long term harm they are doing so that they are informed in their decisions.

I think the confusion comes in because when we say alters are not separate people, it gets taken as us saying they shouldn't be treated with kindness and respect like a human. This is not and never has been what any of these accounts mean. Alters have individuality and may feel like different people and it is okay to acknowledge that, and they still deserve respect and compassion. But this does not mean they are people. No matter how severe your barriers are.

This disorder is not alter disorder but they are a manifestation of trauma and unmet needs. This doesn't diminish the fact that accepting this idea of being a fractured whole is incredibly hard and should be done with the help of a therapist during stabilization.

Here are some good resources:

[skeletalheartattack]

Subtitles below the keep reading:

Hey you, shut your mouth and look at my paw! DON'T FORGET!! [Incomprehensible sped up gibberish] This... Journey... Money... Loads of coins. [Incomprehensible sped up gibberish] What-about-her? What-about-her? ... What-about-her? 'She still like me? [Quiet but mostly incomprehensible gibberish about subtitles] O P S O P N O-1 1. Here's the spell: Love the mermaid, for sure! The mermaid is HAPPY! Okay! It's pretty normal for a fish, right? Guuuyyyssss, beeeee caaarefuuulll wiiiiith theeee GIIIIIRRRRLSSS!!! [Incomprehensible] Oh! Silly! Oh yes! Lamb chop boy! [Incomprehensible] [Very quietly, while white noise is playing over it] Goood eevening, aand weeelcome too the shoooowww... [In the background] Ohhh, mooney!

[mewguca]

20 for ask game?👀

I tried

[kirby-the-gorb]

[theaxolotlkween]

lol au where Rex and Noah were friends during the Nanite Project.

[roughentumble]

ok wait lets think of some actual things yandere!logan would do since that post failed so badly while also being shoved in my face. like, for example, yandere are incredibly obsessive about the object of their affections, while logan has enhanced senses from his mutation, so it wouldnt be unreasonable to assume he'd obsessively steal articles of clothing and other personal effects that carry a scent, and smell them almost religiously until the scent faded, desperate for a little piece of his beloved that soothes his animal hindbrain

[spotaus]

Late Night quick thing (New Age Sillies)

Bad news: That joke post about including Reset + Orchid is definitely not canon. (I legit got sad thinking about Reset being in a universe where Orchid isn't- because their stories are so so intertwined- but Nightmare 100% would NOT risk the whole twins exploding Error's soul thing.)

Good news: This means I COULD include Kane (Reset's older brother who usually dies in timelines where Reset is born) and use it to develope his character a bit more! Also! Perhaps a Blue × Dream kiddo is finally in the stars for me to design?

[fictionadventurer]

"If the structure of your world ever evaporates, I will still be here."

I think The Q might contain one of the greatest declarations of friendship/love ever.

[gabrielisdead]

and they were roommates

[uncanny-tranny]

In discussions about mental health, I am so tired of the only voices mattering being other people or other people who do not deal with a condition/disorder or a specific situation.

"Here's how I deal with loved ones with [x] condition!"

"If you do [y] because of [x mental health reason], you're selfish and everybody who loves you is having their lives made harder by you!"

"If your symptoms are [z], you're gross, and you deserve no sympathy for struggling"

I understand to an extent why people do this, but holy hell, as somebody who struggles and struggles often, the last thing any of us need to be told is that we're a burden that others have to carry. And it's terrible how everybody else's feelings but ours matter - even if we are the ones most affected by our condition or situation.

If you are dealing with issues surrounding your mental health and well-being, know that everything above isn't true; you are worthy of patience, understanding, kindness, and love. You are worthy of being listened to without judgment. You don't have to apologize or "make up" for who you are or what you struggle with.

[mari-lair]

Sure! Hanako have too much to work with, since he is the main character, so I’ll focus on the thing I love the most about him: His inexperience when it comes to caring about others.

Hanako put up thick walls between himself and his peers, rarely connecting to others, be they humans or supernaturals.

Helping students and keeping them safe is his duty, his punishment to atone, not something he personally wants, his own personal view is far more ‘cold’, Amane’s empathy was destroyed after he became a supernatural, beaten down after sixty years of being dead.

What he tells Kou here is true.

He has shown time and time again, people’s life isn’t particularly important to him,  he’ll exchange one life for another without guilt for the person he doomed because of personal preference, and had destroyed yorishiros since the start of the manga, knowing of the danger of doing so, for his own gains.

Before the manga story starts, Hanako is alone.

He plays with the other mysteries but he doesn’t consider anyone his friend. He keeps a distance even from Tsuchigamori, unaware Amane’s moon rock is his old teacher’s yorishiro and seemingly not talking to him much, only looking for Tsuchigomori when he needs him for something.

He is apathetic to practically everything, drowning in his own misery: Tsukasa is the only one that can break him out of his apathetic state, and he terrifies Hanako. Even though he is the titular character, we never see Hanako’s boundary because he doesn’t want to face his yorishiro, finding it much easier to hide and spend his afterlife in the bathroom instead.

Tsukasa was important to Amane, and while he is important to Hanako as well, Tsukasa is rarely perceived as his brother, his presence is mostly treated as the personification of Hanako’s guilt. Hanako hasn’t tried to understand Tsukasa’s feelings or expressed worry about his well-being: out of all his comflicting emotions, his priority is usually to look away.

Hanako has spent his afterlife in this limbo of running away and not connecting with anyone, but eventually, he met two people he got very attached to: Kou and Nene.

He loves them a lot, much more than he loves himself.

He will try his very best to face Tsukasa, the embodiment of the trauma he has been running away from, to keep them safe.

Most of the time, Hanako fails: he is too terrified to act, he panics.

He can’t help when Tsukasa is his oponent.

Even outside his past, there are still things Hanako can’t help with.

The guilt and panic and pain of having no use for someone he wants to help hurt, but Hanako doesn’t run away from this pain.

He tries to help anyways, to reach out as best he can.

And Kou’s trouble linger in his mind, when the kid gets depressed again, Hanako try to help him again.

He want Kou to feel better.

He may have said “He is kind of like you, isn’t he, No.2?” but he doesn’t care about Yako or her attachment to Misaki, his attention is on Kou the second he finish his request: interested in his reaction, not her feelings.

He is selfish though, he cares about their feelings, but he mostly listens to his own, which is most obvious to see with Nene.

In the clock keepers arc he mentioned he kept Nene’s lifespan secret because he wants her to live her best life in blissful ignorance, but he doesn’t make her the priority, he makes himself: He is aware she hates toilet duty, no one enjoys being forced to waste their evenings cleaning a bathroom, but he likes it.

He rarely enjoys things, so he can’t let go of it. He can’t sacrifice this hint of joy for the sake of Nene living “her best life”.

He adores spending time with her, and since he has very little self-worth, he is convinced she would never spend time with him by her own volition, he needs to use the cleaning duty to keep her close.

Is why he gets so happy when she calls him a friend.

This love, this care, is something Hanako really wants from her.

But is also something Hanako doesn’t think he deserves.

He can get frustrated by how much they love him, by how distorted their view is, as if he is a ‘good ghost’. He loves their kindness but he feel greedy for it, he loves their optimist but he is constantly looking down at them for it.

He loves them but he hates himself. So he sabotage himself.

He tells Kou and Nene point blank his bad traits “I am dead already. I don’t care if someone dies or not.” “I killed someone and you shouldn’t excuse it” “I am selfish, I care about you Nene, and not your best friend.” are things he only tell Nene and Kou, as if he was screaming. “I am not a good ghost!” even if he will never  tell them “Leave me alone, stop visiting me.”

Hanako is constantly fighting between clinging to what he loves, regardless of how much his behavior hurt them, and telling himself he should want them away from him.

Both of his attempts to save Nene involved being away from her, either trapping her in picture-perfect until she forgot about him, or exchanging Aoi’s lifespan with Nene’s, saving her but making it so he can’t see her again, and she would eventually forget about him.

The more Hanako's love for Nene grow the bigger the lengths he is willing to go for her, even if at it core, his love remains selfish, he knew Nene wouldn’t be happy with his solutions, but he doesn’t care, cause she will live, and she will live by his own hands.

He acts like doesn’t know why he does this a lot of times:

And to some degree, he truly doesn’t know.

Hanako has many mental blocks when it comes to admitting vulnerability, even to himself. He looks anguished when he confesses to Nene that he wants her to live.

Hanako never had a wish, not outside his “wish” to atone, which he constantly refears to as punishment, not something he personally want, just something he deserves.

 Even as Amane he had given up on his wish.

So wishing for Nene to live is a very new feeling.

This wish makes him go against his duties as No.7 and his quest to ‘repent’, but he can’t even care because he really wants her to live. And is not like going against “god’s will” is what trouble him, since he destroys yorishiros the second he got the chance.

He just want her to not die that much. He can no longer deny he is smitten with her.

We can see this all consuming care with Kou too, even if it is more subtle it’s still very present, and just as impactful in his afterlife.

Nene is someone he loves but very rarely rely on, she is his special someone, he’ll go above and beyond to do what he believe is best for her, ask anyone and even if they disapprove of his actions, they can’t deny he cling to her, always ready to rescue her.

His view on Kou is different, he is someone he ask to fight and help. Is not that he doesn’t trust Nene, not exactly, but he had the “I’ll keep you in the dark mentality” from the second they met, while he never planed to treasure Kou, he just saw enough potential, or use, in this exorcist kid to occasionally rely on him.

Hanako plans for Kou only involved a vague “he can exorcise me later” idea, but he ends up genuinely caring about Kou after he stand up for him agaist Teru in the young exorcist arc. 

It’s no longer just “this boy is so funny! I can both make fun of him and use him”, now Kou is his friend.

Just compare how he treats Kou when he is in Yako’s boundary, and in Hell of Mirrors.

He has gotten the habit to be more honest with Kou, he is always counting on him on little things when they are together, and it hurts so bad when Kou fail, because Hanako trusts him, and he hasn’t trusted someone in such a personal way in 60 years.

Hanako is more comfortable hating himself them his friends, so he usually doesn’t let his dissapointment in Kou linger. Focusing most of his negative thoughts on himself.

Kou isn’t infallible, but he is the one Hanako trusts the most. Hanako used to trust Kou almost blindly, holding on to the feeling, but once he was let down, he gets so hurt, he resents the feeling.

He is a contradictory character. It feels like he hate Kou at times and is frustrated by Nene, but he can’t stop caring about them. He only got attached to two people, he can try, and he will, but he can’t pretend they aren’t important to him.].

We know Hanako lingered in Mei's fake world because his deepest wish is to be human with Nene. So even though it is a big red flag for Nene to see “Amane” in her class, the supernatural couldn’t resist playing pretend.

Just for a bit, just for a taste of a normal life with her.

He is consistently selfish and irrational when it comes to Nene. He can’t let go.

His view on Kou is less frenzy but he can’t be discarded either, the kid is the other half of his reason to want to be alive after years of just accepting his death.

He have made up his mind about not going anywhere, he still refuse to follow the crew to Mei's exit, to the moon, but he wants Kou and Nene to always come to him.

Cause even thought Yashiro was his focus, and Mitsuba took most of Kou’s time, Hanako does make it very clear he want Kou there. He even try to knock Kou out like he did with Nene the second he notices Mitsuba failed to distract him.

He risked Kou being in this world, indulged Mitsuba in his dream to be human and live a normal school life by the side of friends, which is a wish Hanako has shown to actively disapprove of in hell of mirrors (and is the very same wish that Hanako have expressed to have in this arc), because Kou is part of it.

His motives for wanting to trap Kou until he lose his memories are unclear but his anger towards Kou for giving him hope after years of nothing only to realize he can’t back up his promises to make Nene live is all over picture perfect.

And Hanako is a coward, he get angry kou want to stop him, discount his anger on Mitsuba, doesn’t explain anything, take Nene, and leave Kou confused.

Hanako only loses his patience and tell how he feels when Kou is in his way, and Hanako needs to beat him if he wants Nene to stay.

The one thing that he’ll always prioritize above all else is Nene after all.

There is a certain determination to only focus on Nene after picture-perfect, not take Kou as seriously.

And what kills me is that Hanako’s attempts to distance himself are very half-hearted.

It fails.

No matter how real his anger and dissapointment, his care is just as real, if not more so. He is still eager to play fight with Kou and spend time with him. Their overall trio dynamic isn't affected.

Is always “Nene” and “Kou” and “everyone else”. Even when Kou isn’t in the scene, Hanako thinks of him.

There is this idea Kou is important, an implied “If I can’t save Nene, Kou will be the one to save her”, even with all the reasons and proof he has that Kou can’t do something as big as alter her fate, part of him still believe Kou can do it. Is a part of him that is illogical and Hanako hates it, and doesn’t want to deal with it.

So he focus on Nene's lifespan, he became obsessed with it.

He has always been possessive of Nene. In any chapter they are together he is touchy and flirty and so openly attached to her, it’s insane!

He knows he is in love.

He also knows he is the ghost of a dead killed and feels like Nene deserves better than what he has to offer, but he can’t let her go.

Even when he is determined to grant her wish, to make a ‘no turn back’ decision, his determination crumbles the second they are face to face, his logic dies and he is just... Happy to see her again.

Even if he knows his plans failed, even if he knows she will die, he just... like seeing her.

His love is openly selfish and doomed to not last, which is something he understands and doesn’t know how to deal with, but just like he can’t force himself to truly hate Kou and stop believing in him, he also can’t force himself to stop loving Nene and desperately trying to find ways to make her live.

He is a mess.

[stcries]

well that was certainly odd, she'd had sworn this tree was knocked down just a few days ago. normally it wouldn't be a problem, with all the crazy happenings in this town, honestly this pales in comparison to some of the stuff she's seen. but no, she had to get tangled up in this since her father was throwing a hissy fit over it. well, he certainly was passionate about his craft, that's for sure. oh well, it'll be a big hassle to cut it down again, but hey, that's what the corduroy's were for!

↳  starter call. @riiese