#Baby deidara

[takhidk]

sleeeeep...

[atoriv-art]

doodles

[mixelation]

i got up to do a chore and then was like "no, i should write down this sentence first" and then wrote a 700 word intro to "deidara is minato's oops baby" i guess

Our story, dear reader, starts like many do: with tragedy. 

At the height of the Third Shinobi War, Namikaze Minato and Uzumaki Kushina come to an agreement. Whenever Minato is out of the village on a long-term mission, they are both free to have sex with whomever they please. 

They refine this agreement multiple times over the years, to keep the both of them comfortable and happy. They make rules to prevent emotional attachments. They both commit to their due diligence in screening for STIs and preventing pregnancies. 

There is no rule against having sex with enemy ninja. Six months out from his marriage, Minato sleeps with an Iwa missing-nin. Her name is Juri, but Minato never learns this. She’s the one who makes the proposition, and he thinks it’s a bit sexy, to sleep with the enemy. Juri enjoys the thrill of fucking the man that her former village, now her most hated enemy, is most afraid of. 

The condom breaks. Juri insists she knows the contraceptive jutsu, and she definitely doesn’t want to be pregnant, on account of currently being on the run from her home village. Minato hedges and asks her to do the jutsu in front of him just to be sure, and she acquiesces. They part on good terms and do not give the other any way to contact each other. 

Minato goes home and reports the broken condom to his fiancée, but neither of them give the incident much worry. The contraceptive jutsu is easy, and Minato saw her do it, and also what are the chances that this random woman would get pregnant from this one hook up?

Kushina also thinks sleeping with the enemy is kind of sexy. They roleplay it a few times and otherwise never think of Juri again. 

What neither of them know is that Juri has a bloodline limit which affects her chakra. What Juri herself doesn’t even know, is that she needs specific adjustments to the contraceptive jutsu to accommodate her bloodline limit. It’s never come up before. She’s never had a condom break. 

Half a year later, Minato and Kushina are married, and Juri is recaptured by Iwa. 

“You can’t execute me,” she insists. “I’m pregnant. Don’t you want more explosion release babies?”

She does not reveal the identity of the father. This seems like it could get her special treatment, or it might get both her and her baby killed. She decides not to risk it. 

For the first few years of his life, little Deidara has an average upbringing. Juri is under constant surveillance, but the war has been costly and Iwa does need more babies. That Deidara is healthy and demonstrates a strong aptitude for shinobi skills is a boon to Iwa and a boon to Juri. 

The Yellow Flash becomes Hokage, and Deidara begins ninja training years early. Iwa insists Juri have more children. They pick out men for her. 

To breed me like a dog, Juri thinks, grinding her teeth. No thanks!

She leaves the village again. She does give some thought into bringing Deidara with her, but ultimately concludes her chances of survival will be higher without him. 

Fuck Iwa, she thinks, and on her first day as a free woman, she sends a message to Konoha. 

Juri does not survive the week. Uzumaki Kushina and her newborn baby Naruto, in an unrelated incident you may know something about, also do not survive the week. Konoha is plunged into chaos, and the message from Juri ends up buried in a report that the grieving Yellow Flash doesn’t read. 

The start to this story, as you can see, dear reader, is very sad. We are left with three of our named characters dead. One of our survivors is overwhelmed with grief and survivor’s guilt for years to come, unable to forsake his duties to the village to properly process his loss. The other survivor is suddenly plunged into a confusing, chaotic world without a parental figure to support him and no way for such a young mind to comprehend why this is happening to him. 

But don’t worry, dear reader.  Ten years later, while shuffling through old documents in order to prepare for renegotiating a peace treaty, Namikaze Minato will find the note from Iwa no Juri, and everything will change.

[everyneji]

NARUTO CHARACTER POPULARITY POLL #6 (2006)

[x-emeraldsky-x]

TobiDei Week 2024: Day 1 - Fanboy

// @tobideiweek

[hellcifrogs]

What about ships within the akatsuki? Do you have any?

Hmm Akatsuki ships are a little bittersweet for me - my heart says yes, but my mind says no lol

That is mostly for KisaIta and KakuHida, because I really like both ships, but only if they're outside of the plot. I guess never saw the appeal in SasoDei, I think they're super cute as master/student art nerds tho.

I guess Sasuke x Deidara and Yahiko x Konan if you consider Sasuke and Yahiko part of it ; u;)

And NOW that I think about it, Sasori x Orochimaru would be really really funny

[blessed-days]

Baby Akatsukis :3c

[everytobito]

[yacchannanamin]

✬First time watching Naruto Shippuden - Gifset per episode✬

Episode 29 - Kakashi Enlightened!

[velvetgoldminecherry]

15 year old Deidara when he arrived to the Akatsuki: Hey leader, I wanted to ask you if I could eat ice cream before dinner

Pain: Did you ask Konan alredy?

Deidara: Yes

Pain: And what did she say?

Deidara: She said no

Pain: Then why are you asking me if Konan alredy said no?

Deidara: Beause she is not the boss of you

Pain: ...

Nagato trying (and failing) not to panic: It’s a trap, it’s a trap, it’s a trap, it’s a trap, it’s a trap, it’s a trap

[ladykissingfish]

Deidara: It's so cold, hm. Sasori: So put on a sweater. Deidara: Sweaters are boring. Can't you think of a better way to warm me up, hm ~ ? Sasori: Gloves? More socks? A coat? Wool pants? Hot cocoa, tea or coffee? A roaring fire? Deidara: C'mon, Danna ... *wraps his arms around Sasori* How about you lend me some of that body heat and we make our own fire? Sasori: Oh brat ... you're a big boy, aren't you? I'll give you some matches and lighting papers but surely you're smart enough to build your own fire? Deidara: Sometimes I wonder if you really are as dense as you act, OR if you're just messing with me. Sasori: Dense? You think I'm dense? Sasori: *suddenly pins Deidara against the wall, both hands on either side of his head* Sasori: Well, baby, did it ever occur to you that I know exactly what you're talking about? That all of your innuendo and your clumsy attempts at flirting are far from lost on me? Sasori: *leans extremely close to Deidara* I can hear your heart pounding, brat. I can feel the blood racing through your veins. My nearness is overwhelming to you, isn't it? You want nothing more than for me to rip your clothes off and make you my puppet in the most carnal of ways, right? You want me to take you, to make you mine, in every sense of the word, don't you? Mm? Deidara: Deidara: *faints* Sasori: *leans down and puts a hand on Deidara's face* Sasori: You're plenty warm now, brat. You're welcome.

[queercodedvillains]

I firmly believe kishimoto made deidara say "I'm not into S&M" because he KNEW everyone clocked his bratty bottom vibe off the bat and he needed to make a canon occurrence to point at to disprove it but the thing is he doesn't know Deidara like I do!! he has noooo idea he accidentally created a queer icon. But I do. And no posthumous editorialization will ever overshadow that.

[geckkkoonthewall]

Baby day 🧑‍🍼💕

[mixelation]

i hate that my brain made an itadei femslash au because now i'm acutely aware of how much better they both are as disaster women. imagine the deidara as minato's long lost love child au i just reblogged but deidara is minato's specialest princess (who is actually a screaming feral missing-nin) and itachi is the nice girl next door she Makes Worse

[yowyowyaoi]

*a few hours after an argument, Deidara goes into the bedroom to find Obito quietly reading a book*

Deidara: Hey, Obi … come out to the living room, please. 

Obito: I’m really not up to fighting anymore, Dei. If you want to belittle me some more can you at least wait until I’ve recharged a bit?

Deidara: Obito, please? Just come out here!

*Obito sighs and gets to his feet. He shuffles into the living room and is surprised; there are orange and purple lights hung up everywhere, fake cobwebs strung over the tables and chairs, and a variety of foods by the couch*

Obito: W-what is all this?

Deidara: I’m … sorry, hm. I didn’t realize how selfish I sounded before. Even if I don’t like Halloween, YOU do, hm. I had no right to call your favorite holiday “stupid”. You do everything for me. So I’m going to make you the best spooky celebration ever!

Deidara: *takes his hand and pulls him to the couch*

Deidara: I bought your favorite candy, and soda, and I made those popcorn balls you said your mom made at Halloween when you were a kid, hm. I’ve got a couple of scary movies set up for us to watch. And when those are over, it’ll be about time for trick or treating to start. I figure we can leave a bowl of candy on the porch and we can go out in costumes, walk around and stuff. 

Obito:

Obito: *hugs Deidara to him hard* I love you.

Deidara: *smiles* You’d better, Uchiha. 

Obito: *picks up a popcorn ball* These look great! Er … before I bite into one … you didn’t set any of these up to explode, did you?

Deidara: Explode? Me? You think I’d do that to your food? *kisses his cheek* You’re a funny man, hm.

Obito: So you promise I’m okay to eat these?

Deidara: Yep!

Obito: *takes a caution nibble of a popcorn ball; it’s fine*

Deidara: But the bowl of candy I’m planning on leaving out for the trick or treaters … let’s just say I think this will be the last year this house gets egged, hm! *laughs crazily*

Obito:

Deidara: Now … which scary movie do you want to watch first?

Obito:

Obito: I … I think I’m already watching one …

[edai-crplpnk]

Do you ever think about the fact that Deidara is a teenager who was without a village by 13 year-old and committed suicide at 19?

Anyway