#BASICALLY i should take notes. this is only the intro but it has good material

[bitterpngs]

the curse of having to write things down to better process them / understand them but also. being significantly slowed down when writing things down / taking notes

[writing-with-olive]

How to write essays fast

I've been writing a lot of papers, so that's what's on my mind.

So this mostly applies to your standard 5-paragraph paper, though it's fairly straightforward to adapt it to longer (or sometimes shorter) assignments.

One of the main things to note is that essays are VERY formulaic, so knowing the formula and being able to write down your ideas in a way that fit into the formula is probably the number one way to get stuff done fast. Because of that, most of what I’m covering is breaking down the formulas so they’re more accessable.

Also this got very long. If there’s anything you want me to expand on just let me know in the comments or send me an ask/DM and I’ll make another post that goes more in-depth about it.

Structure (I hate this step, so I’ve figured out how to do it very fast becuase it’s still important)

The first thing to consider is prewriting and structure. To start, there are two major paper structures I usually consider. The first goes

Introduction

Main point #1

Main point #2

Main point #3

Conclusion

This is good if you have a lot to say on the topic, or if it's something closer to a summary essay where there's not really an opposing side. In something where there are distinct sides, (or if you have less to say to support your own side), you may want something that looks like

Introduction

Main point #1

Main point #2

Why the other side is wrong

Conclusion

The "why the other side is wrong" side is involves thinking through the MOST credible arguments the other side might make, and methodically breaking them down to show how they don't work. The stronger the argument you choose, the more effective this is.

Since I personally hate prewriting with a passion, I usually do this step very fast and end up with an outline that looks like

Intro [insert thesis statement]

P1: [three word summary]

P2: [three word summary]

P3: [three word summary]

Conclusion

(thesis statement, introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion tips are all below the cut)

Usually, this is enough so when I look at my outline, I can see what I'm trying to focus on for each paragraph - and do so without straying from my main point.

For the prewriting, the main things to do are identify with basic structure of the two will serve your purposes better, and write a thesis statement that solidly supports your argument.

Thesis Statement

There are so many guides about creating thesis statements that are powerful, but I'm just going to quickly go over how to be fast about it.

The first thing to know is that a thesis statement is usually a complex sentence: it's your entire essay distilled down to a single line. The general formula I follow goes something like this:

"In their [media type] [name of specific piece], [creator's full name] explored/demonstrated/other verb [theme you're going to be arguing about] demonstrated/using/as evidenced/as shown by [example 1], [example 2], and [optional example 3]."

For example, a thesis statement that follows this format might go

“In his short film Job at Place, David Davidson explored the manifestations of human stupidity through the absurdity of the main character’s home, school, and office.”

Or, if you're writing a historical piece, it might look something like this:

"In [place/time period], [thing you're arguing was happening]: they had to/the conditions were such that/other thing to set up a list [example 1], [example 2], and [example 3]."

For example, a thesis statement that follows this format might go

“During the Tusken Invasion of 32nd century Tatooine, it was the lives of the children that were most affected, from their social development and connections with others to more personal struggles they didn’t yet have the tools to overcome.”

The examples you give are going to correlate to your paragraphs - example 1 is for body paragraph 1, and so on. 

Introduction

I like to think of the introduction as a funnel that gets more and more specific.

First, write a broad statement that touches on whatever theme you’re referencing. 

Job at Place is about human stupidity, so something like “while great minds have flourished throughout the ages, so have the not-so-great.”

Tatooine is about war, and about child development, so something like “children’s development has always been impacted by the state of the world around them.” or “war has many effects, many of which impact those not directly involved with the conflict.”

The idea is that it’s a broad statement that can almost be looked at like a universal truth.

Next, you’re going to go deeper - two sentences that narrow down the time and place you’re talking about specifically, and how that time and place fit into your universal statement. 

The fourth sentence gets even more specific - introducing how the thesis sentence fits into your first three sentences.

Then the last line is your thesis statements. 

Body Paragraphs

Your three main body paragraphs all follow the same formula. (I’ll get to the “why the other side is wrong” paragraph in a minute)

The first sentence you’re going to want is a topic sentence. For this, you’re going to want to look at the example you gave in your thesis statement that corresponds to this paragraph, and see how it relates to your central claim. 

If we’re going with the Job at Place example from above, for the second paragraph, you might open with a line like:

“A striking characteristic of Davidson’s short film was the abnormality of the main character’s school, used to showcase exactly what happens when poor decisions get taken too far.”

Everything within the paragraph will then back up the claim you’re making in the topic sentence (which in turn is backing up your thesis). 

For each paragraph, you’re probably going to want about three pieces of evidence, either in the form of direct quotes (plucking words directly from the source) or paraphrased quotes (summarizing what happened in your own words). The quote should be used to directly support your argument.

After each piece of evidence, you’re going to want about... twoish lines of analysis (this number can change as you need it to, but two lines is something solid to fall back to). 

While analysis can take all kinds of forms, one pattern you can use if you’re stuck is

evidence sentence 

what it means

how that meaning ties back into your main point

Following this pattern, a piece of analysis of Job at Place might look like:

“One of the first images of the private school is that it’s a tall spire with creaking stairs and loose floorboards. Despite this, the principal has eight personal cars parked outside on full display. While the first glimpse of the school might indicate that there is little money to care for the structural integrity, the notion is directly negated by the principal’s actions. By using these two images, Davidson demonstrates what can happen to the youth when those in power let greed carry them away.”

After you write your analysis, include some kind of transition phrase, and go onto the next piece of evidence.

The last line of your paragraph is going to transition into the next paragraph while also summing up the main point of what you talked about in the current one. (This line can also get moved down and tacked onto the beginning of the next paragraph, before the topic sentence, but I have found it tends to look less cohesive that way).

You might choose something like:

“While the school was a disaster in its own right, it wasn’t the only example of human folly.”

If you’re writing a “this is why the other side is wrong” you’re going to want to think about the MOST compelling arguments the other side could make. Take the top one (or two), and figure out ways to crack them apart using evidence from your source material.

In this case, your topic sentence might start off with something like

“While opponents might say [insert compelling counterargument], their reasoning breaks down when one takes into account the evidence.”

At this point, you’re going to follow the same formula as above. The main thing to keep in mind is that for the duration of this paragraph, your point is that the other side’s claim of X is wrong.

Conclusion!

If you know what you’re doing, this is actually the easiest part.

(wait, what??????)

The thing is, you NEVER want to introduce new ideas into your conclusion. Instead, you’re summarizing your main points.

The formula I follow per sentence is:

Thesis statement but reworded (you can change the sentence structure too)

Topic sentence for paragraph 2 or 3, but reworded (I’ll explain why you shouldn’t do the sentence for P1 in just a sec)

Topic sentence for paragraph 1 or 3 but reworded

Topic sentence for paragraph 1 or 2 but reworded

Wow sentence or question (i’ll get to this too)

The idea for the middle three sentences is you don’t want them to read as repetitive, so you’re going to mix up the order so it doesn’t match the order of the rest of the essay. This will help to keep it fresh.

The wow sentence is basically the last impression you get to make. I find it’s usually a good idea to go just a tad dramatic (it sounds dumb, but it has never failed me). If I can’t think of anything, a declarative statement on whatever major theme was being discussed throughout the essay usually does the trick.

Examples:

All of this shows that in the absence of friendships and platonic love, humanity will falter.

Fiction may seem far fetched now, but if the world falls into those same mistakes, it’s only a matter of time until it becomes a reality.

Art has existed for as long as humans have populated the earth; it’s not going away any time soon.

A lesson everyone must understand is the most powerful weapon isn’t anything physical or tangeable: it’s the ideas that exist in the minds of those who care.

(I told you they were going to be dramatic) A way I look at it is if you can’t imagine dropping the mic on the last line, it needs to be stronger (yes I found that plagiarized with not even a whisper of credit on Pinterest, but it works).

If you wrote a SOLID essay, consider ending with a question aimed at the reader (this will push your essay in the direction of either the positive or negative extreme: a strong essay will become stronger, a weak essay will become weaker). Questions can be a call to action or rhetorical as a means to drive home your final point. Becuase they’re more nuanced to the content of the essay, I don’t really have great examples to give you though (sorry).

Hopefully this is useful to at least some of you - good luck!

++++

Tagging:@candlemouse

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[artificialqueens]

A Series Of Mutual Feelings, 1/3 (Scarjah) - Pazinae

chapter 1: i hate u (and the feelings mutual)

Chapter Summary: Ra'jah is determined to have a fresh start and be a better person, now enrolled as a first year fashion school student- but Scarlet has a way of always making her newfound plans falter. With a rocky high school history, the (not so) fortuitous pair endure some mutual hatred

A/N: enemies 2 luvers scarjah everyone xoxo meant to be a oneshot, but got a little carried away n my doc for this is currently 19 pages long ahaha so to be more palatable it will be a 4 chapter story (its says 3, but you'll see). this one is mainly the intro for the story to understand where they're at emotionally in the present, and is mostly ra'jah centric on her growth + kylie friendship fluff bc theyre the cutest, and a bit of scarlet pov. feedback super super welcome, enjoy !!! 

***

Scarlet strode down the hall with a sway in her hips, her heels clacking on the laminate floor. What kind of tacky ass bitch wears heels to school anyways? Ra'jah scoffed internally, watched the girl saunter like she's on a tightrope, each tantalizing step brought her foot exactly in front of the other. Her body fell into a rhythm, stomping the fucking campus like a lion stalking the jungle for the sheer fun of watching it’s prey scamper. Scarlet's bouncing skirt, her signature grin and luscious ginger curls sprouting out her scalp made her gag. And not in the stunning way. Just as quickly as she came she was gone, and, to be fair, she was just another girl sandwiched in the masses just getting to where she’s going. But she could pluck that arrogant little redhead bitch out of any crowd. Not a conscious choice of course, hell, being reminded of her sheer presence causes a battle of trying not to roll her eyes behind her skull. She can't help that she sees her. Not when Scarlet's lips are painted the same shade of bold crimson as the tight, sleeveless top she's wearing, like a fresh drop of blood in a sea of grey clad bodies swimming around in their hoodies.

This isn't high school anymore Ra'jah. A repetitive reminder that needs to be said evermore until it's understood at her core. Because It's different now, she knows that- it has to be. No fucking way are her dreams going to get caught up in everything again, they're too big to be put at stake. She can't live just to be like that again, and this time she's too grown to waste her time on useless people. High school was a bubble, a 4 year trance that she's left and is more than ready to forget about. 

"Hey, Ra'jah!" That southern, velvety voice could only belong to one stunning woman. She turned around to spot her speed walking to catch up. 

"Aye! Kylie!" Ra'jah stopped and gave a little wave as Kylie approached, her highlight shining even in the shitty indoor light. The two moved over to the side of the hall, and leaned against the wall. "If it isn't Miss Kylie Sonique Love," With such a pleasing name, Ra'jah doesn't think she will, or, really can ever get tired of saying the other girl's name. "What's up?"

"Nothin', just tired as fuck," It's kinda cute, the way her accent gets stronger when she's grumpy. "I'mma pass out at some point, I did not get enough sleep." Even as a grumble her voice is so soft and angelic, Ra'jah could probably fall asleep to the blonde reading true crime murder stories. 

"Goddamn, it sure as hell doesn't show!" Which is true, Kylie was as effervescent as always, any visible messy hair from under her beanie looked intentional. Even in her oversized t-shirt and shorts, there was an undeniable, captivating charm about her that made it impossible for her to look bad "You look gorgeous girl" 

"Awh, thanks honey," She smiles a soft, hazy smile. "You don't look too bad yourself." She hums, eyeing her up with a grin. Before she could even argue a response, the country girl quickly perks up and slaps her hand on Ra'jah's shoulder in excitement. "Oh also! I want your opinion- I'm thinking about dying my hair pink." She can see the visible sparkle in the pair of eyes looking at hers. "Thoughts?" She asks, voice becoming giddy "Oooh bitch! You better, that'd be so fierce!" The (mostly) purple haired girl exclaimed, delight evident in her voice "For real, you'd look so good. And you know, ba-BY" she claps her hands together just for added emphasis, "I support ALL the impulsive hair decisions".

"Yess, obviously I want input only from bad bitches with the best hair"

"I told you I did these myself right?" she asked, running her shoulder length hair through her twirling fingers. "I've been really into doing hair recently"

"Wait, really? It looks so pretty, the fade to purple is so good"

"What'd you mean 'wait really' hoe, what you implying 'bout my hair skills?" 

"Just that a talented woman like you should share your expertise!" Even when she was loud her voice was just as comforting, the tone reminiscent of a silk blanket on her skin

"All it took for me was bleach, a bottle of violet Arctic Fox dye, and the holy spirit of Brad Mondo"

"First of all I'm not trusting no mans named Brad," Ra'jah cackled a little because, yeah that's fair. "And secondly, if you're free, come an' help a girl out then!

"You're inviting me over? Wow we're moving kinda fast Kylie" 

"Oh shut up bitch" but the undying twinkle in her eye confirmed the unsaid agreement that Ra'jah would be doing Kylie's hair, at some point.

"I'm free on Thursday, can I visit then?"

"Yea that works" She smiled, and the closeness between the two wasn't something the taller girl ever planned, or really felt before. But she had it now, a friend she really cares about, and she never wanted to lose it.

"Shit what time is it?" Even in her Shitty Human era she was still a timely gal, her mother didn't raise no late hoe. "Don't stress it Raj, we have like 15 minutes. Introduction to drafting and sewing, right?"

"Yes ma'am. Wanna start going?" "Sure thing" This year is for a new start, making new friends, and getting a chance to create new first impressions. Rebrand herself y'know, and the hindrance that is Scarlet's existence, wrapped in all the ancient things she'd rather not think about, won't stop her.

The walk to class was a pleasant blur. With Kylie yawning and walking essentially shoulder to shoulder with Ra'jah had they been the same height, they slipped into both  comfortable conversation, and silence. With all the noise around them, their presence brought an ease without any awkwardness. 

 A trek opted through the outdoor route that was albeit a tad longer, provided some well needed greenery and fresh air.

"You excited for class?" Ra'jah asked, only half aware of where she was walking to. Her body was on autopilot, and Kylie knows the way, probably.  

"You're amazing if you can get excited by class"

"It's fun!"

"Only 'cause you're good at it"

"You're good at it"

"You know what I mean. Isn't this one your favorite?" 

"It's not my favorite" 

"Uh huh"

"I just like it a lot. Maybee essentially jus' cause I don't hafta try" It was a mandatory course, but Ra'jah's not complaining. Perhaps it's a little vain to enjoy something just to remind everyone you can do it, but it was an easy break from the rest of the courses. And a nice little egoboost.

"So I'm right!" 

"C'mon it's October and we're still on basic techniques"

"It's called introductory," She remarked. "Do you even pay attention half the time?"

"No but bitch neither do you"

"True" Kylie grinned in agreement.

"The way you're coming for me but it's easy for you too!" She hasn't been sewing as long as Ra'jah, but she has great taste so it really balanced out. "And let it be known that I use that class time to think about incredibly productive things"

"Oh that's her name?"

"What?" She didn't mean for her tone to drop. Didn't mean for her legs to stop walking, planting themselves into the cement. Didn't mean for the smile on her face to plummet at the implication. Her visceral reaction was louder than the cluelessness she gave off.  

"Calm down" She giggled, as if Ra'jah's reaction woke her up from her grogginess, her breathlessness equivalent to a shot of espresso for Kylie. "You just seem really occupied sometimes is what I meant"

"Me? No I'm not" She couldn't convince herself.

"Okay babe. The models of your fashion sketches just look a little reminiscent"  

"You know Scarlet isn't the only person with ginger hair right?" Ra'jah bites back, the condescending tone not her intention, but not exactly unwanted in the moment. Scarlet is insufferable, she doesn't want her own name slandered is all, being associated with the arrogant shit.

"Baby, I ain't mention Scarlet. That's all you.'' She had a shit eating smirk and maybe Ra'jah takes everything back about how nice friends are. IF there was inspiration, Scarlet is objectively nice looking so it's not a big deal there might be similarities if you squint.  

"She was implied" 

"If you want her to be"

They get inside and take a seat at one of the large tables, divided into stations with a sewing machine and some material at each one. Ra'jah takes a spot at the edge, with Kylie seated to her right. 

 On paper, it's all been planned out for Ra'jah; during her strolls between classes she'll take in all her surroundings and actively look for inspiration, pondering all the natural shapes and patterns of the world in a way she can manipulate into clothing. On paper, she'll make the most out of the introductory class, sketching designs between the minimal notes and sewing practices. On paper, she'll finish the mornings class with ease and have extra time to practice some new things. 

In reality? Paper is flimsy, especially when its accountability is held by a fleeting mind. It's hard to bask in the world when unwanted questions plague her head. Mostly revolving around a certain redhead. God, fuck her. Fuck her pretty eyes and fuck her sculpted face and fuck her euphonious voice. Does everyone who sees Ra'jah see her patheticness? How she allowed some cunt to infiltrate her mind, set up home in her head and take up all the space? Let her infect every cell in the brain like a parasite until her skull is nothing but an infiltrated shell for an infestation caught up with infatuation?

"Ra'jah, you good?"  The girl sat across from her, Trinity, piped up, and Ra'jah had to bite back a smile. The icy, timid girl she met just a few weeks ago was starting the conversation.

"Yeah, I'm fine, why?"

"You just looked a little spaced out" 

"Nah, it's just that this class is a breeze an' I'm just thinking about a project for another class" 

"Mmm"

"Plus it's hard to just think of designs when there's no inspiration"

"I mean, we're supposed to practice gathering and making ruffles right now"

"Oh shit! We are?"

"Yeah girl!" Ra'jah, shaking her head at herself, finally picked up some of the fabric around her and got to work. "You'll be alright?"

"Oh don't worry about me! I'm all good"

"Okayyy if you need anything just yell" Ra'jah replied with a hum and a nod. Watching the girl running the fabric under the machine, memories of the first time they'd talked flashed, days of the nearly silent girl feeling so distant.

  "I really like your earrings" The girl raised her head, looking left and right a little as if making sure it was directed at her. 

"Thanks." She mumbled, vaguely looking at Ra'jah's direction. 

"If you don't mind, where'd you get them?"

"Uh, I thrifted it."

"Oh, cool" Ra'jah smiled, before quickly adding "Thanks". The raven haired girl didn't reply. The start of the intriguing game of 'does she hate me, is she shy, or both?' 

   After all the awkward attempts made for the quiet girl to be comfortable and maybe make a friend, a sense of pride rang through her. She met Kylie and Trinity here a mere month ago, and yeah, maybe she could be nice. She could walk the fineline of warm socialization without being annoying. The new Ra'jah doesn't do unnecessary mean quips just for the sake of a little power rush. She can be authentically her while being polite. New Ra'jah makes friends- not enemies. 

"Oh by the way" Ra'jah snapped her head up at Trinity's voice 

"Yeah, what's up?"

"I know it's a little random but do you know what you're gonna be for Halloween?"

"Huh. Well, I haven't really thought about it" Ra'jah remarked, "I just don't care for Halloween and all that"

"Really? Girl, you're not gonna do anything, dress up, go out, nothing?"

"Baby all that work and money for some costume I'll wear once? No ma'am- and the fuck will I do, I barely have ideas for school!"

"Hey, you could wear anything and it's a costume. Wear a black dress, you're a cat"

"You think I'm that basic?"

"Yeah?"

 "Fuck you" She snorted, and Trinity had a goofy smile, looking at Ra'jah with a sense of familiar fondness. "And thanks, really, but I don't care for all that spooky shit anyways"

"Damn, alright!" Teeth out and all, she laughed. The blonde on the right leaned in a little, a pleasant opposition of Trinity's hesitation is Kylie's eagerness

"Jesus Ra'jah, what did Halloween do to you?" The southern girl butts in. "You could dress as the grinch of Halloween, steal children's candy" 

"You know what, yeah, I'll be a sluttified grinch"

"You're kinda built the same already" Trinity joins with a grin

"Hey!"

"Sluttified? Are you implying the grinch isn't sexy enough?" Ra'jah choked a little at that, found herself smiling with some dopey content, at what exactly she's not sure. 

"Do ya'll think being the grinch would count as like, being a furry?" Trinity asked, voice dripping in an odd amount of seriousness. 

"What? Baby no" Kylie jumped in. "Yes! absolutely, how would it NOT?" Trinity argues, and maybe it's the easiness of everything.  Of how nice it is to just fall into banter when you let people in. Bouncing off the two girls, she doesn't need to think of how to be funny, how to one up herself, remind everyone of why she's worthy. She can just, be. And that warrants a smile. 

With Ra'jah's elbow propped on the table, she rested her cheek against her palm to face forward, before turning a little to face Trinity

"But why do ya ask Trin? About Halloween"

"Oh, kinda last minute but I just want some ideas to figure mine out" She shrugs, and Kylie leans over once more. It's a little heartwarming, how physically close she always instinctively wants to be. 

"Oh! Are you going to the Halloween party this weekend?"

"Nah parties aren't really my thing"

"Awh, but it'll be fun!"

"Yeah standing in a mass of people I won't talk to will be so fun"

"Fine- Ra'jah, are you goin'?" Rajah turns her head to follow the voices like a cat keeping up with a beam of light. 

"Uh..."

"RIGHT, forgot, Halloween's not your thing". A party where she can have a disguise, let loose and have fun. It feels almost embarrassing to admit to her newfound friends that she's never been to a party, and the thought of a Halloween party didn't even cross her mind. Maybe Halloween isn't not her thing, it's just not something she'd indulge in. For reasons. Like, schoolwork. 

"Welllllll…" Ra'jah hummed, dragging on with a small grin

"OH the prospect of partying changes things huh?" 

"You know, me an' Halloween, we complicated okay!" They laugh, but Ra'jah's left thinking. New or old Ra'jah both, spends a little too much time in the internal realm of the brain. 

The class falls silent except the murmurs of the buzzing machines, and the three chatter in whispers. Although usually it's mostly her and Kylie with occasional injections of confirmation from Trinity

"You're insane if you think spaghettini is better than fettuccine" Kylie protested "Spaghettini is literally the objective worst"

"Says who?!" Ra'jah paused sewing to look up at Kylie in defiance

"Me!"

"Trinity which is better" 

"Huh? Ya'll It's too early for this." Trinity complained.

"Oh, says the bitch who asked if the grinch was a furry" Ra'jah retorted, but Trinity brushed her off to look at Kylie "Oh wait! Also, Kylie, what're you gonna be for Halloween?" She gave a little snicker before answering 

"Don't come for me but honestly? Was thinking about being a cat" 

"AAAAAH!" Ra'jah and Trinity erupted laughing.

"But like, a hot one okay!" Ra'jah quickly tried to redeem herself.

"You'll be the hottest ass cat around" Plus, worse comes to worst, Ra'jah will be a witch or something, and they can be hot and basic together. 

When the class ended, they packed their things, and exchanged their goodbyes

"I'll see y'all around!"

"See you! Good luck on your textile project Trin" 

"Thanks!" She waved, yelling a final "Bye!" 

"Bye!" The three part, and Ra'jah makes her way to her second class. History of costume and design was next, and quickly weighing it out, she decided to take a quicker path through the halls. Suddenly, the weight of a body knocked at her side, the two stumbling around for a few seconds. A gust of papers had fallen from both parties' arms, and landed on the floor.

"Oh shit! I'm so-" Scarlet cuts herself off when she looks up at whom she's bumped into.

"Maybe watch where you're going" Ra'jah snorts out of sheer instinct, squatting down to gather her papers where Scarlet follows suit, just a little too close. The vague, sweet scent of strawberries she gives off is suffocating.

"Maybe if you weren't such a stuck up cunt taking up half the hallway I wouldn't hit you" The attention sends a masochistic jolt down her spine

"Uh oh someone's in a bad mood. Stuck up cunt that's a new one! Love the creativity. You should drop out of this school and be a writer" As much as she screamed internally to just shut the fuck up and get your things, it was so easy to slip back to this.

"Thanks but I'm good! When you fail out this year you can give it a try"

"Baby, me? Fail out?" Please don't imply that. Please don't make me doubt that I can and deserve to be here. I don't want to seek approval from others, but I can't help but be hurt at disapproval. Of course, her thoughts don't verbalize as the words that come out of her mouth. "That's a lot of talk for a girl who probably spends more hours getting fucked than studying" Before she can think it through, process the flash of hurt on her face and the way her fingers tense around the last piece of paper, before Ra'jah can really understand the weight of her own words she continues. "But I guess that's how you get yo' A's right?"

Their exchanges were in aggressive whispers, hushed to anyone above them. To most people, they'd find a sight of two girls muttering to one another while they pick up some things they've dropped.

"You're so much prettier when you're quiet" Scarlet huffed, standing up in one swift motion. Those words aren't a compliment. Like, at all. So why does Ra'jah's dumb, twisted heart stop for a second? The implied connection of herself and 'pretty' slows her body and slurs her mind until she's pushing herself up off the ground in slow motion. It's been so many months of mundanity, the small interaction felt all so familiar and foreign and exciting at the same time.But the haziness of her words and their little games makes her forget for a second of what the fuck just happened, and a wave of patheticness washed over her as she started to walk, eyes focused at the cream walls. For all her hemming and hawing, Ra'jah hasn't. Fucking. Changed. 

A rush of everything dives into her guts, a sick adrenaline coated in dread, self loathing and the slight urge to cry, nestling in her stomach like a bird claiming a branch as it's home. Her skin was electric, and she hated to admit she loved it, the thrill of interacting with her, cattiness and all. Imagine feeling this much from fucking bumping into someone? Fingers clenched, nails digging in her own palms at how much she hates her. Intense emotions are a high of their own, and Ra'jah can't help but indulge. The piercing sting of her flesh being pressed in with her nails is intensified as she listens for the faint voice of that lanky girl always accompanying Scarlet. 

"You good Scarlet?"

"Yeah, thanks" She can't look back, but she can't help but wonder- are they hugging? Holding hands? It doesn't- it shouldn't matter to her. The fun amusement pales in comparison to the misery settling in. The realization that she's fighting with Scarlet like they're 16 at the back of English class.

Of all the schools, why'd that girl have to come here? Of all the things to pursue, why the same as herself? Of all the people, why'd it have to be her? Ra'jah didn't have the audacity to explore the last question. What she means, she's not too sure. The only thing in the world she's sure of is that she can't be both New Ra'jah™ and Old Ra'jah™ to different people. The line between the two existences isn't so bold anymore, and painting over the bumps isn't as effective as she'd hoped. 

  ***

  Truth be told, watching herself move around in skirts was one of her favorite things- just about tied with watching others watch her. Maybe that's why she joined cheer in highschool. Especially with the support from (or, lack of thereof) a certain grimacing purple haired girl, a runaway model from a fashion show who wound up wandering this school. She never needed to turn and look, didn't need sight to know there's a burn at her back, nor who it's radiating from. Scarlet always walked with just a bit of a straighter back, just a bit more purpose, and just a bit more stride in her step when her favorite pair of wandering eyes were around. A small part of her always wants to turn around, catch her gaze and watch her frantically look away and pretend she's talking to someone. Or maybe she'll hold it, stare back with just as much intensity. But her wistful attention is enough of an ego boost. The scowl ridden bitch, smile washed away just for her, and yet that's where her attention lied. It made her bite back a smile. 

Scarlet is a pretty thing, and she didn't need constant confirmation to remind her that she's beautiful. She's hot, she knows it, Ra'jah knows it, and Scarlet knows that's all she is to her. A pretty thing. Whatever. She's not important. 

In fear of her brain melting, and/or being fried to a crisp, Scarlet doesn't bother having two classes back to back. Her mental capacity is full, and a nice salad will probably help with that. She's on her way to meet with Yvie for lunch, thinking about their weekend plans, when she takes a misstep and stumbles, all her weight focused in her shoulder which slams against someone else's side.

"Oh shit! I'm so-" the universe is an asshole. May the odds never be in my favor. 

"Maybe watch where you're going" Her sneer is venomous, and the universe has suddenly become just the second biggest asshole. 

"Maybe if you weren't such a stuck up cunt taking up half the hallway I wouldn't hit you" Ra'jah didn't do anything, a rational voice lectures, but she ignores it the way she's ignoring the taller girls face. Scarlet's grabbing at her papers, avoiding eye contact because that selfish pile of shit on her right takes up enough space as is, and if she looks into her eyes, sees that stupid fucking face this close she might do something bad. Like, in the sense of, punching her. Yeah, she can't look at her or she'll beat her up. Because that's a fight she'd win.  

"Uh oh someone's in a bad mood. Stuck up cunt that's a new one! Love the creativity. You should drop out of this school and be a writer" Ra'jah snides, and she needs to drop out before Scarlet gets grey hair from her. 

"Thanks but I'm good! When you fail out this year you can give it a try" Her words are about as empty as her own stomach, because she hasn't eaten since last night, and Ra'jah will quit fashion school and become a science engineer before she fails out. 

"Baby, me? Fail out?" Yeah, with the flawless outfit you're wearing that you sure as hell made just because you were bored one night. Your pants could literally be sold as a luxury brand. The girl who started sewing when she a embryo in the womb, you'll fucking fail out.  "That's a lot of talk for a girl who probably spends more hours getting fucked than studying- But I guess that's how you get yo' A's right?" Scarlet looks up, not at Ra'jah but away from the ground, and the urge to yell, hit her, and cry come up at the same time. She wants to scream, get everyone in hearing range to know that Ra'jah is a loser who will amount to nothing. She wants to reach out and choke her. But articulating her anger into words is too much, and she ends up just whispering whatever words are willing to come out as she gets up, not caring if she left any papers behind. 

"You're so much prettier when you're quiet" And that's the closest thing to honest Scarlet's said all day. 

In the distance, she sees Yvie walking towards her, so she waits until the freshly dyed green haired girl is caught up beside her. 

"You good Scarlet?" 

"Yeah, thanks" The two walk together, side by side, and Scarlet loops her arm through Yvie's, linking the pair. 

"You know, Scarlie, you should stop wearing heels before you break your ankles"

"Hey!" She giggled, slapping the taller girl's arm in response. "I never fall, people just get in my way" Yvie scoffs, unable to stop the corners of her lips turning up and giving her away, forever endeared by the shorter girl. Scarlet's affection makes her forget that they've only known each other for a month. They reach a set of blue doors, and Yvie opens it, holding it for Scarlet to come through. Her face seems puzzled 

"Are you down to go to Mika's Cafe? I want to get some coffee" 

"Sure, they have nice breakfast sandwiches and omelettes, I'm down" It's only a few minutes away from campus 

"What's on your mind"

"Just like, school stuff. I have to make a dress for creative fashion design, and I'm just thinking about it, and what I wanna do" Would it be tmi to blurt that Ra'jah is insufferable? 

"Cool," Yvie hummed, and spiteful words cycled through Scarlet's head, deciding on what exactly to say, before Yvie beats her to it, whipping her head in some seeming urgency

 "OH by the way, I know you're busy with your project and you're determined on getting in the top 5 and all," 

"Uh huh" 

"Buuuuut, there's a Halloween party this weekend, and I was gonna go with Brooke and her friends but they're not going anymore," Scarlet knows how Yvie feels about Brooke, and to be fair she's only met her a few times in passing, but how someone like Yvie could fall for someone as uptight as the boring blonde is beyond her. She doesn't dare bring up another possibility of why her dorm mate would be avoiding the stoic girl, a possibility involving a particularly hot headed latina glued to the Canadians side. "They decided clubbing downtown would be more fun or whatever," They're outside on the pavement now, and the afternoon breeze graces their skin. It's a welcome environment, and Scarlet slows down her pace to enjoy the air, with Yvie quickly matching her pace. 

"Wouldn't you rather go clubbing though? Like not with Brooke and them but with others," Scarlet is friendly and all, but she swears Yvie is somehow friends with half the school. She sure as hell can find a group to go with.

"I guess, but I want to go to the party," she quiets a little as she continues, "There are some people I want to see there, for fun and stuff"

"Mmmm!" Scarlet widens her eyes, looking at the taller girl with a knowing glare, sprinkled with a teeny bit of judgement. 

"It's kinda lame to go there alone!" 

"No it's not!" 

"Scarls, yeah it is"

"Why do you even care? Wanna impress some girls?" In response, Yvie rolled her eyes so hard Scarlet could practically feel it. 

"'Cause you want me to go to a fun Halloween party by myself? 

"Yes! You could walk up to anyone and there's like an 80% chance you already know them, and a 100% chance you'll become friends anyways" The quirky girl's charm is undeniable, she'll be fine without Scarlet. Yvie gives a defeated sigh

"Seems kinda homophobic" 

"Ugh you know what's actually homophobic? The fact that more people aren't madly in love with me. I'm LITERALLY perfect" The prospect of love feels like it's been dangled infront of her, her whole life. Imagine looking like Scarlet, and never dated before?

"You're right girl, you are" Yvie laughed her deep, hearty cackle and Scarlet wanted to melt a little. 

"Thank you, finally someone with taste" Looking at her outfit, she remembers that the tall girl's taste is kind of debatable, and Scarlet almost wants to say she takes it back

"You think Ra'jah has good taste then?" 

"What?" 

"Also a party seems like the best way to meet more people y'know?" She brushes over her last question, and it's much better that way.

"You know what, whatever 'll go with you" Scarlet agrees so she'll shut up. If she hears her roommate bring up she-who-shall-not-be-named-because-shes-a-stick-in-the-ass anymore she might lose her mind. And, she really doesn't have any other plans for the night so might as well.

 ***

AN: going to be a while for the next chapter bc im busy so here's a lil thing lol xo

***

They weren't supposed to meet here. Weren't supposed to see each other. At least, that's what Scarlet tries to tell herself.

"You are such a fucking pain, oh my god" Scarlet seethed because everything is hazy except the impassive girl standing before her and she can't think straight. Her cold eyes are apathetic and Scarlet wants to implode, like a glass thermostat engulfed in a burning heat where it's not a question of if, but an inevitable when? "Maybe I am arrogant" Her voice was coated in a sickly sweet frustration. She pushed further into Ra'jah's space, the taller girl stiffening at the ever decreasing space between the two. How can she be so still, so unreactive? This is all so amusing to her? Is she having fun, so fucking detached from everything and watching Scarlet crumble? Pretending like she cares about Scarlet past her pretty face? Enjoying her sadistic game? Fuck her, fuck her, fuck her. 

"Maybe I am narcissistic" Their faces were inches apart, and Ra'jah could feel the angry womans hot breathe on her cheek, the pungent smell of alcohol intruding her nose.

"But I'd rather be a confident, arrogant narcissist than whatever kind of sad fuck you are" 

Scarlet growled, and she wanted to breathe fire, burn Ra'jah's existence out of her mind and scream at everything she felt because of her. Except that she sees her, and wants her, wants to hurt her and touch her and without thinking her hands are digging around Ra'jah's waist.

"You are such-" Scarlet was interrupted as the other girl leaned in, framed the shorter girl's face with both her hands, and pressed her lips against Scarlets. Any thoughts or mental functionality she had were put to an abrupt stop. This wasn't supposed to happen. It's been so long, but no time has passed since they were last like this. The plug to her brain was pulled, and it's all static and her bodys done a full 180. Ra'jah's piercing lips are numbing, and her overheated body feels like it's been dunked in ice where all her nerves are all in shock. They weren't supposed to do this anymore, it's the only thing they've ever been able to agree on. She was frozen, unable to move, or think, far too busy being hyper focused on the familiar sugary lips on hers, sending waves of nostalgia through her body. Time has only heighted the intoxication. She gains some composure and surges forward, but Ra'jah's pulling away, opening her mouth to finally say something.

"You're so much prettier when you're quiet"

[solastia]

Day Five: Corset - Namjoon & Jungkook

Notes: So yeah, it’s basically Corsetry + Namtiddies kink *shrug* Also, this is sorta...soft smut? They don’t actually fuck, but it’s about the lead to the kink itself, I guess. 

****

It had started out simple enough. He’d been looking at the photos from the last event and had noticed a trend with the fan’s point of focus - Namjoon’s chest. And honestly, he’d noticed the changes in his boyfriend’s body and had even helped by pulling him into workout sessions with him, but the size of his chest had never really been something he’d specifically focused on before. 

However, the pictures made them impossible to ignore. The way they puffed out when he was particularly proud of something, the way they got pushed up and together when he crossed his arms, the way they were big enough to jiggle a bit when he shook someone’s hand. 

So Jungkook had gotten lost in an internet spiral of pictures leading to his current predicament. 

See, they had a rule. Don’t look at fanart. 

The ones that they were specifically tagged in or even handed during fansigns were fine. They were usually just one of their faces. But he knew that fanart could be...explicit. And the thought of even seeing Jin hyung’s dick anywhere near him - even as a drawing - was enough to make him want to lose his breakfast. 

So he should have known better when he clicked the Namtiddies tag on twitter. 

He’d worked his way through the tag though, trying to ignore the ones that depicted his man with the other members and peeking guiltily at the “Namkook” ones. And then...he saw it. 

It was rather tame compared to some of the art he’d seen and featured Namjoon alone. The art itself was absolutely stunning and showed a massive amount of talent. The colors were rich jewel tones with a muted lighting to give the impression of seduction. Namjoon hyung lay sprawled across a heap of black satin with his arms above his head as he stared at the viewer like he was daring them to look away. 

But the focus of the piece had obviously been the purple corset strapped to his torso, pushing his chest up to where they looked like a pair of plump tits. It was also more than that for Jungkook. He liked the way the corset flared over his hyung’s hips, the way it accentuated his already tiny waist which only seemed to make the rest of him look so strong and thick. 

In short, that picture had fucked him up. It had been all he could think of for weeks. Every time he’d hug his boyfriend he’d wonder what it would be like to feel the fabric under his fingers. He’d chub up every time he had to tie his damn shoes. So it was inevitable really that his dick would go shopping for him and he’d end up where he was today. 

Jungkook sat in his room, spinning on his desk chair as he held the precious item in one hand and scrolled through his phone idly with the other. He’d hardly been able to stop rubbing his thumb all over it since the moment he’d opened the package. 

He’d spent hours on the internet looking for the perfect one, but had gotten so overwhelmed that he just picked something that he thought would be pretty. It was simple enough in design based on all the others he saw. It was an underbust with a double steel boned waist, with lacing all the way down the back. The material was an amethyst-toned satin that he thought would look amazing on his boyfriend. 

He’d spent days watching videos and teaching himself how to tie it up and how to get out of it safely and what to watch for. He’d even - in a burst of brilliance - stolen Jimin’s full-length mirror and set it up across from his bed. 

He now had everything set up - except for the model. He gulped, wondering again how to bring it up with Namjoon without sounding like some weirdo perv. It wasn’t even that big a deal, he thought. Just trying on some clothes. 

“Kook? Everything good?” 

Jungkook jumped when the deep voice finally registered, squeaking (manfully) as he tried to hide what was in his hands. 

“Hyung, what are you doing here?” 

Namjoon raised an eyebrow as he closed the door behind him and lifted his phone. “You texted me. Thought you wanted to show me something. Isn’t that what a key smash means?” 

Jungkook glanced at the phone and groaned internally at the string of letters that certainly looked like they were from him. 

“Sorry, I was lost in thought, must have done that accidentally.” 

“Anything I can help with?” 

Jungkook grabbed that perfect intro instantly. 

“Would you mind trying something on for me?” he blurts, his cheeks flaming. 

Namjoon’s lips tilt up in a smirk. “Oh? Is that what this was about? Let me see.” 

Namjoon reaches out and Jungkook reluctantly hands him the piece. 

“Kook,” Namjoon chuckles lowly as he inspects it. “You know this isn’t my first time wearing a corset. Remember that singles shoot years ago?” 

“Yeah,” he answers shyly (of course he did - he’d just jerked it to that picture two days ago), “But this is a different kind. And umm, I just really think you’d look beautiful.” 

Namjoon glances over at him, his gaze calculating. “Yeah? Hmm,” he hums, holding it away from him to look it over. “It looks pretty hardcore.” 

“Um, it’s steel-bone and free lacing in the back. It’s meant to be...tight. Like, it can cut off a lot of breathing. BUT, I watched a lot of stuff and we’ll have a knife nearby to cut the laces if you need it.” 

“You’ve really put a lot of thought into this,” Namjoon murmurs affectionately, smirking at his boyfriend. 

He nods briskly, just the sight of Namjoon holding that purple silk doing something to him already. 

“Yeah, I’ve been thinking about you in it a lot,” he admits. 

Namjoon studies him for a moment and then shrugs, setting the corset on the bed. The he tears off his shirt without another word. Jungkook’s breath hitches, much as it usually when he’s first faced with his boyfriend’s beautiful body. 

“Pants too?” Namjoon asks softly with a coy smile. 

Jungkook swallows and nods, his eyes following the path of the pants until they puddled on the ground. His boyfriend decided to have mercy on him and kick off his boxers too without teasing him first. 

He was still soft, but as Jungkook’s appreciative stare caressed his body, it gave a few interested twitches. 

“Alright, is this thing a set or by itself?” 

“Just the corset,” Jungkook answered quietly. “Is that okay?” 

“It’s your fantasy, baby.” 

Jungkook grins and stands up, grabbing the corset. “In front of the mirror, hyung.” 

“Ohhhh, I heard Jimin bitching about it being missing earlier. Kinky.” 

Jungkook chuckles mischievously and follows Namjoon to the mirror. He peeks over his shoulder as he drapes the front of the corset over Namjoon’s chest. Just the vision of the silk over his skin and the way the cups settled over his chest was exciting. 

“Okay, hyung. Hold onto that for my while I lace you.” 

Namjoon nods and settles his hands onto the silk to hold it in place while Jungkook puts the laces through the first holes. 

“How tight can I do this?” 

“Uh,” Namjoon mumbles thoughtfully, “ not too tight, since I’ve never had a real one on before. But...I want to feel it.” 

The way that Namjoon said that made Jungkook’s eyes fly to the mirror where he observes with awe the way Namjoon is staring at himself in the mirror. He looks more fascinated than indulgent now, his eyes following the way the corset settled on himself. 

Jungkook licks his lips and focuses back on the lacing. “This one,” he notices his voice is strangely deep. “Is just for fun. For trying things out. If you end up liking it, we can get you a waist trainer. It has to be fitted to you.” 

“Yeah? Maybe,” Namjoon answers distractedly, eyes focused on the corset tightening as Jungkook works his fingers up. 

“Mmmhmm. I mean, you already have a small waist, so you don’t really need to change it. But it certainly looks pretty,” Jungkook mumbles. “How does it feel? Too tight?” 

“I can...I can do a little more, I think?” 

“You think, or do you know? Don’t push yourself, hyung.” 

“A little tighter.” 

Jungkook peeks over his boyfriend’s shoulder to get a look, loving the way the corset is starting to pull at his hips and cinch in his waist. He also loves the way Namjoon’s cock is aimed high, pulsing with excitement. 

He grins and goes back to lacing, groaning out loud at how hot it is that he has to really tug hard once he gets closer to his chest. 

Finally done, he pulls back and sits on the bed as he stares at his beautiful boyfriend. The final image is everything he thought it would be. Namjoon stands stall in front of the mirror, the corset caressing his hips and making them stand out. The way it flared even made his ass look generous, something that even he - a thoroughly whipped boyfriend - had to admit was an achievement.

But his fucking chest...

The corset had pushed his meaty pecs up to the point that Jungkook could easily grab full handfuls. He stared as they jiggled from the way Namjoon had to adjust his breathing. 

“How does it look?” 

Jungkook pulled his eyes to Namjoon’s in the mirror, the other looking at him almost shyly. 

“Amazing. You look...so fucking good. Like, look at your hips. And your chest is so fucking juicy.” 

“Who uses juicy for chests, weirdo.” 

“I dunno, hyung. They look juicy to me. Wanna bite them.” 

Namjoon smirks. “I bet.” 

“How do you feel?” Jungkook asks. 

“I feel...sexy. Powerful,” he answers slowly, looking at himself. He flattens a hand against his stomach. “And yet...I like the way it makes me feel...constrained. Like, I’m...I don’t know. It’s kinda like the feeling I get when I ask you to choke me, you know?” 

“Really? So, you wanna do this again sometime?” Jungkook asks breathlessly, imagining his hyung in more beautiful corsets, all the colors of the rainbow. 

Maybe with matching ropes. 

Namjoon’s hand flies to his groin as he stares silently, kneading absently. “Yeah. I really like it.” 

“Good. Let me take some pictures and then I’m taking that off of you so I can fuck you. I am not getting spunk on fucking silk, hyung.” 

Namjoon chuckles, turning to Jungkook and kissing him roughly. “Okay, baby.” 

[blackjack-15]

Are You Poe-ndering What I’m Poe-ndering? — Thoughts on: Warnings at Waverly Academy (WAC)

Previous Metas: SCK/SCK2, STFD, MHM, TRT, FIN, SSH, DOG, CAR, DDI, SHA, CUR, CLK, TRN, DAN, CRE, ICE, CRY, VEN, HAU, RAN

Hello and welcome to a Nancy Drew meta series! 30 metas, 30 Nancy Drew Games that I’m comfortable with doing meta about. Hot takes, cold takes, and just Takes will abound, but one thing’s for sure: they’ll all be longer than I mean them to be.

Each meta will have different distinct sections: an Introduction, an exploration of the Title, an explanation of the Mystery, a run-through of the Suspects. Then, I’ll tackle some of my favorite and least favorite things about the game, and finish it off with ideas on how to improve it.

If any game requires an extra section or two, they’ll be listed in the paragraph above, along with links to previous metas (or not links, as tumblr is freaking out with links).

These metas are not spoiler free, though I’ll list any games/media that they might spoil here: WAC, mention of Sabrina the Teenage Witch (the OG live-action show not the horrible CW monstrosity); discussion of the Poe short stories “The Imp of the Perverse” and “The Black Cat”.

The Intro:

It’s time to go to school, y’all — and not just any school; a rich, elite, all-girls school. Welcome to the jungle.

Warnings at Waverly Academy is one of two games that I don’t sort into a category (like “Expanded” “Jetsetting” or “Odd”), the other being the game that follows it (TOT). There are a few reasons for this — the next category really doesn’t apply, but neither does the previous category, WAC and TOT both feature a gradual shift in tone and approach to the games, etc. If I really had to pick a designation, I’d say that these are the “Growing Pains” games, where the world gets a little bit more open — but not all at once, the characters get a little more fleshed out — but not by much, and a few new things are tried with our character rolls — to varying degrees of success.

On the whole, WAC tackles its efforts far better than TOT does, but it does make for a slightly less interesting meta if one was just to focus on what WAC does wrong and what it does right. Instead, we’re going to take a look at how brilliant WAC is tonally and thematically, and how its source material — not kept secret in the game — builds it up and makes it better and better upon replays.

Before I begin, it’s fair to warn you all that my thesis was done on Poe and adaptation theory (and its relevance towards detective novels but I won’t touch much on that part of it), so I might get a bit nerdy. Hopefully it’s still exciting and relatable enough to the game that it’ll make for interesting, rather than academic, reading.

WAC uses Poe’s stories — specifically “The Black Cat” (obviously) and “The Imp of the Perverse” (in my slightly expert opinion) — as thematic (what the game means) and tonal (how the game feels) touchstones, not to mention their inclusion for some of the events in the plot. A brief summary of both is probably important when looking at how they relate to WAC.

“The Imp of the Perverse” is an essay-like short story by Poe that basically states that inside of every person is the desire to do something wrong or incorrect simply because it is wrong or incorrect (not morally, but in terms of self-interest).

In the story, a man commits a clever murder and gets away with it, receiving the inheritance that he wanted from the dead man. The man cannot be caught — there is no evidence of any wrongdoing, let alone any that points to him — unless he confesses. The idea of confessing — not out of guilt, but just because it would be the wrong thing to do — plays on his mind until, driven half-mad with his preoccupation, he confesses and is imprisoned and executed. The titular “imp” is basically a devil on the shoulder who wants what would be worst for our own self-interest, simply because it is the worst.

MENTIONS OF ANIMAL CRUELTY FOR THE STORY OF THE BLACK CAT. PLEASE SKIP IF THIS BOTHERS YOU.

“The Black Cat” on the other hand is pretty much a proto-“Tell-Tale Heart” — an alcoholic man becomes emotionally distant from his cat (a rare sentence, I know) because he things the cat is judging him for being a drunk; one night in a drunken rage, he cuts out its eye and kills it. A fire catches his home, leaving an imprint of the hanged cat upon the only standing wall.

END OF DIRECT MENTIONS OF ANIMAL CRUELTY.

The man and his wife move, and he, after a period of guilt, makes friends with another cat — a cat nigh-identical to the first one, even missing an eye. When he (drunk, as per usual) and his wife are walking down the cellar stairs, however, he nearly trips over the cat and becomes enraged, trying to kill the cat, only to be stopped by his wife. He instead kills his wife, burying her behind the wall of the cellar and bricking up the hole.

When the police come by they find nothing, and the cat has disappeared, so the man feels safe. The police come back to investigate the cellar, the man taps on the wall to boast of how well the house is made — only to have horrific screeching start up behind the wall. The police break the wall down and find not only his wife’s body, but the black cat sitting on it as well. The man breaks down, overwhelmed by his own guilt, and the story ends.

END OF BLACK CAT STORY SYNOPSIS.

It’s pretty clear what influence “The Black Cat” had on WAC — not only does the villain name herself after the titular cat, but WAC is also a story of guilt, hidden crimes, and personal weaknesses that manifest in rage towards other innocents.

It’s actually really interesting that Corine takes the mantle of “The Black Cat” up when she begins targeting other valedictorian candidates; the black cat in the story is sort of a symbol of the man’s sin — a reaction to his sins and misdeeds, and sort of a catalyst of justice. This ties into how Corine sees herself — someone rejected and mistreated by those who are “filthy” themselves, and who must then show others the things they hate about themselves.

It’s Corine’s self-identification as a victim that starts all this, and it causes her to victimize others in potentially fatal ways. The black cat stands for guilt, for the sins of others, and yet it leads Corine further and further away from any justness herself.

The story of “The Imp of the Perverse” has a little bit of a more subtle tie-in to the game; in a way, each suspect does exactly what they know they shouldn’t.

Rachel and Kim are obvious — they really shouldn’t switch back and forth so regularly, nor should they be so sloppy at informing the other as to what they did and who they met that day. Leela, who should be studying if she wants to keep her spot in the race, instead passes the time by playing sports. Mel knows that the cloak-and-dagger meetings are to be an absolute secret, yet wears hair bows that she constantly loses to one. Izzy has her future meticulously planned out, yet refuses to back up an incredibly important paper (and also relies on being popular, yet pursues other girls’ boyfriends).

Even Corine falls under this; by targeting Nancy, she’s ensuring that suspicion will fall on her, as 2/3rds of the victims would then be her roommates. She’s also cutting her chances of being valedictorian by not working hard for it and instead relying on other, riskier methods. Every move she makes leads to it being more and more obvious that she’s behind them — and yet, she continues anyway, just like the man in “The Imp of the Perverse” — leading from a few small incidents to attempted murder.

Ignoring WAC’s ties to Poe renders it as a good, solid mystery without anything remarkable about it (other than the pendulum, of course). Exploring its ties to Poe not only helps set up exactly who the villain is, but also sets the tone for the mystery. This isn’t a mystery of Nancy foiling a villain through her smarts; instead, it’s a story about how guilt and a perverse desire for self-destruction leads a once-promising valedictorian candidate to more and more severe crimes, culminating in the exact opposite of what she was working for.

The Title:

It’s pretty awesome, full stop.

Warnings at Waverly Academy is honestly a great title for a Nancy Drew mystery; it gives us location, a sense of the world we’re in (scholastic), and a vague yet not too vague sense of what’s going on. The alliteration is good, the abbreviation amuses me — it’s just solid all the way around.

There’s not much else to say; sure, you could strengthen it by finding a punchier “w” word to begin with, but that’s just quibbling. It’s great, I love it, let’s move on to the Happenings at Waverly Academy (which, by the way, would have been a terrible name for the game).

The Mystery:

Called in as a professional undercover detective, Nancy’s just young enough to hide in plain sight at Waverly Academy, an upper-crust private school for those girls fortunate enough to be both rich and smart (aside from a few scholarship students, who are simply smart). Nancy’s called in due to a few near-death experiences by students, punctuated always by notes simply signed “The Black Cat”. It’s only a few days until break ends, so Nancy must work quickly to stop the sabotage, find the Black Cat, and solve the mystery before anyone dies.

Nancy, as always, finds quickly that not everything is so cut-and-dried. Each valedictorian candidate has the motive, means, and opportunity to get the other girls out of their way, and all have something to lose. Add in a secret society, the threat of demerits from an overly zealous RA, and the sneaking feeling that there might be a greater mystery behind all of these incidents, and you get a case mostly unlike any that Nancy’s had to crack before.

Oh, and Ned is on the phone, serving the player up with the single punch of testosterone in the game (aside from the hunky Mr. Harris, of course).

As a mystery, WAC is honestly super solid. Lots of characters, lots of clues, lots of red herrings, lots of mini-mysteries going on inside of the larger mystery…it’s everything you want from a Nancy Drew game, and it doesn’t really drop any of the balls it juggles. Sure, the pendulum might be a bit much for you if you’re not up on your Poe, but I think it’s a lot of fun, and for sure a very different type of ending puzzle — not drowning or running out of air or any other ending that Nancy Drew games likes to do.

Let’s go to the movers and shakers behind this mystery, then, shall we?

The Suspects:

Mel Corbalis is the fan-favorite character, so let’s start with her in this huge, estrogen-laden cast. Distinctly of the goth persuasion, Mel is a fantastically talented cello player and a Waverly Legacy, despite the fact that no one at school wants to be caught dead near her. She’s not an outcast the way that Corine is, however, because of her simple insistence on being exactly who she is, and not trying to hide or apologize for it.

Go Mel.

As a suspect, Mel is slightly more suspicious than most other girls, on account of Megan being her roommate, but otherwise sits on fairly equal standing with them all. She’s by far the most outwardly aggressive, but also comes across as simply no-nonsense (a welcome thing in any girl’s academy, believe me). She also has the least of Poe about her, despite her taste in fashion, and is in general a breath of fresh wind.

Next up is Leela Yadav, athlete extraordinaire. She sure can bounce that ball, at least. Izzy’s roommate and just as much a social climber (though in less in-your-face ways), Leela wants it all — popular, athletic, and valedictorian. It’s a lot for any girl to handle, much less one who can’t seem to keep it all together.

As a suspect, Leela’s not bad — she’s as even as (most) anyone else throughout the first half of the game, but falls off a bit when Izzy isn’t specifically targeted by the Black Cat (as most of her gripes are against Izzy, particularly). Leela’s more there to increase the number of students and throw suspicion around, but she does a darn fine job of it, and is well-rounded enough to be genuinely enjoyable.

We’d be remiss not to mention the queen bee (and my personal favorite suspect) at Waverly Academy, Izzy Romero. Snobbish, arrogant, and with apparently the smarts and people skills to back it up, Izzy is the first Waverly girl that Nancy (as Becca) meets, and boy does she set the player up for what Waverly is really like. Izzy’s smart enough to know when she should put in the effort and clever enough to delegate it when she can, and that alone endears her to me, even leaving aside her hilarious dialogue and general vibes.

As a suspect, Izzy is the sole girl who really isn’t set up to be much other than what she is — a girl with more than enough smarts to get power, and enough power to pretty much do what she wants to do. Sure, Nancy can catch Izzy doing stuff she shouldn’t do, but she’s never really a heavy-hitter when it comes to the Black Cat stuff. I love her for that, too. She’s a lot like Libby from the original Sabrina the Teenage Witch show; a bit nasty, but hilarious and effectively harmless — and I’ve always liked Libby-style characters.

And her stint in the Blackwood Society is aces too. Man, this girl does not quit.

Rachel Hubbard, is, of course, actually Rachel and Kim Hubbard, and they are the plot point that WAC is most known for. They actually have marginally separate personalities too, with one being far snappier than the other, and having strengths in different subjects.

Part of the reason I love the Hubbard twins so much is that their presence is so...Poeian. Poe was all about duplicity and mirrors, and the Hubbard twins show off both themes. It’s just a wonderful little bit of a nod to the source material (thematically speaking) of the game, and I adore it.

As suspects, the Hubbards aren’t bad at all; they’re lying, sneaking around, and blatantly “forget” what they’ve said to people, all of which adds up to be very untrustworthy. Were it not for Nancy (and Corine) sneaking around, they might have gotten through their Waverly experience without anyone figuring it out — and that’s something to respect, even if it does make them prime targets for blackmail. And speaking of blackmail…

Corine Meyers is both Nancy’s roommate and 100% our villain this time around. Obsessed with becoming valedictorian and knowing she probably won’t get it, Corine basically puts out self-assigned hits on each of her fellow candidates, attempting to get the title by violence rather than by being worthy. She’s even cunning enough to blackmail the Hubbard twins into doing some of her dirty work, throwing people off her scent. Sure, Corine is a rather pathetic (in the non-sympathetic sense) person who I have little respect for, but she does make a good villain in a Poe-ish story.

As a suspect, the game actually makes a pretty good go at not assigning the blame too quickly to anyone, so Corine does manage to hide out in the shadows. Sure, one of the girls who went home was her roommate, but the other was Mel’s, so suspicion isn’t centered right on her. I also love that she’s actually punished for what she does — no amount of sad pictures at the end of the game changes that. Corine actually has the cleverness that CUR tries (but doesn’t succeed) to give Jane, and I think it’s wonderful.

I’m not going to give Megan Vargas or Danielle Hayes their individual chunks, but they are present here as well, standing in as victims so we know that this teenaged effery very nearly had a body count. They really help to give a sense of…well, purposeful disconnection to the game, where the setting and the snow and the fact that these are high school girls doesn’t stop the crimes from being deadly.

The Favorite:

The first thing that I have to say is that I love how the tone and crimes of this game contrast so well with a lot of the games (especially, sorry, CUR). This takes place at a school, your suspects are all teenaged girls…and yet the game doesn’t shy away from how horrific things really are to get Nancy called in. Two girls have nearly died in quick succession from one another, and the girls are going on chasing acclaim. It’s a messed up situation, and the game doesn’t shy away from pointing that out.

These crimes are treated with severity, and the culprit, despite things that might have softened her ending under lesser writers, is punished with total removal. WAC in some ways is a spiritual successor to SCK, in that it takes place at a school, lives are endangered, Nancy is (mostly) undercover, and the culprit is not above killing Nancy messily solely for personal gain. The difference, of course, is that SCK is not done well, and WAC, on the whole, is.

As mentioned above, I have a soft spot for Poeian detective stories, and so I enjoy WAC probably more than I would had they modeled it after, say, Holmesian detective stories instead. The ideas of duplicity, mirrors, guilt, the Imp of the Perverse — the self-destructive tendency to do what we should not simply because we should not do it — these are all present and accounted for in WAC from different girls and facets of the plot (Corine and the secret society both represent duplicity, the Hubbard girls are mirrors, Waverly’s own guilt towards the students it failed, etc.).

My favorite puzzle has to be WAC’s resident cooking minigame, where Nancy prepares hot lettuce sandwiches and definitely underdone cookies to the delight of the gossiping horde. It’s like TRN’s cheeseburger minigame writ large, and every second of it is wonderful — the gossip, the food-making, the unexpected panic of a teacher order — everything. It also helps Nancy keep her head above water, should she be caught sneaking around after hours, and I think that’s great as well.

My favorite moment of the game is when Nancy comes out of the wall in Mel’s room and Mel isn’t having even one iota of her excuses to cut and run. It’s not often that a non-villain will press Nancy so intently when Nancy does something Inherently Untrustworthy, and I think it’s great that a 17 year old girl behaves exactly as one would, demanding an explanation and not letting Nancy wiggle her way out of it. Sheer perfection and the moment, I would guess, that Mel became a lot of people’s favorite WAC character.

I also love everything to do with the Blackwood Society. Nancy goes so…metal there and we really don’t get enough of Metal Nancy. It features one of the few moments of absolutely, unequivocally brilliant voice acting that Lani stumbles upon (the conversation about the bow), and it’s a wonder to behold.

The Un-Favorite:

While WAC certainly has great things about it, it’s not by any means a perfect game. It wouldn’t sit in my top 10, and possibly not even in my top 15, though it would depend on the day. The reasons for this?

A big one is my least favorite puzzle: taking the pictures. It’s a good idea — a gofer quest to help Nancy get to meet each student, talk to them, etc. and make sure no one gets lost in the shuffle (like with what usually happens with Guadalupe in ICE, for example) — and is also great for acquainting Nancy with the Hubbard(s). However, in practice, the interface makes it incredibly obnoxious to do, what with having to retake pictures because the pan or zoom is slightly off, and having to jump around from place to place. It’s a good idea, but could have been implemented far, far more smoothly than it actually was.

My least favorite moment in the game is actually the whole deal with Izzy’s paper being deleted. It’s a dick move — and I have no problem with that, honestly, but the fact that she has no backup is just like…girl, what on earth are you doing where you don’t back up your work.

Adding to that is the fact that even in the far-off yesteryear of 2009, Word autosaves (as did many, if not all, word processors) and a copy definitely would have still been retrievable on her computer, and that the teacher would almost definitely have a previous rough draft or at least outline…it’s a pretty shaky thing to have happen (the not-having, not the deleting), and it does break the game down a bit. I know it’s not that big a deal to most people, but it seriously hampers my ability to stay within the world of WAC and to take the mystery seriously.

The Fix:

So how would I fix Warnings at Waverly Academy?

There’s honestly not too much to do; while not a perfect game, WAC is perfectly solid, accomplishing what it needs to do properly and well, without too many little flaws to mar its reputation.

In other words, it’s a bit like an unsuccessful valedictorian candidate; well-rounded, but not a standout when compared to others that burn a little brighter.

I would, however, re-work the picture task; I’m not sure how you could make it less clunky, mechanically speaking, but it definitely needs it, along with a way to know if it’s a good picture or not before you go through all the effort of going to the library and plugging in the camera. I love the idea — just make the idea work better.

I’d also change the “deleted paper” storyline and go a little more destructive — give the computer an awful virus instead. Sure, her paper is backed up (in 2009, probably on a USB drive, or saved to her email or something), and she has her stuff, but that locks away all personalized notes, study sheets, etc. It’s something that would be pretty damning for a Valedictorian candidate, while also still being firmly in the realm of believability.

And on a smaller note, remove the ability to call Bess in this game. It always goes to voicemail and serves no purpose. Why even include it?

Where WAC really shines is its individualistic approach to each girl and in its permeation of Poeian themes; that’s what makes it special as a game, rather than any of its individual parts. Sometimes, you need to take a break from haunted mansions and carousels and museum thefts and marriage troubles and friends who are always in need of help – and you just need to play a game with gossip galore, hot lettuce bagels, and an actual death-bringing pendulum to round it out.

[whentherewerebicycles]

i have to wonder if there's an implication that can be drawn the other way around wrt playfulness and stress - not that un-playful individuals experience stress more acutely, but that people who experience stress more acutely become less and less playful. i have intense, disproportionate shame/fear reactions due to Childhood Trauma(tm) and it's inhibiting as fuck - my work with my singing teacher to relax and (though i've never framed it this way) play(!) w/out embarrassment has been (1/3)

one of the most healing things for me... so i think there's this nexus of inhibition & confidence/security & perspective/scale & playfulness & resilience. to be playful you have to be a bit silly and vulnerable and willing to take a risk on doing something "wrong" i.e. not take yourself too seriously, but if you feel chronically unsafe you'll take yourself & everything else too seriously and want to do it "right" so you minimize the perceived risk of harm. going back to my singing teacher (2/3)

the most important thing she did for me was create an explicitly safe, non-judgmental environment where it's not only ok but even desirable to "fuck up" and "look/sound stupid" and to reinforce that message multiple times. so anyway that quote just made me think that "don't take things/yourself too seriously" sits at this interesting intersection between increasing playfulness & coping strategies for emotional damage. sorry to ramble about it in your ask box lol! (3/3)

*

yes I think this is so so true!! all of this, lol, but especially the part about how acute stress can make it increasingly difficult to be playful. i have written a lot about working through internalized shame here in the past, and especially about the ways that shame causes you to both physically and emotionally shut down parts of yourself. (i actually gave a talk about this subject recently! it was like, a layman’s intro to the neuroscience of shame, with a specific focus on how shame responses affect people’s ability to learn & to connect socially with others in learning spaces.) 

i do just want to clarify that the excerpt i posted was from a study that was very narrowly focused on answering the question: “is there a link between playfulness levels and positive/adaptive coping mechanisms in responding to stress?” the study wasn’t designed to answer larger questions about what kinds of life experiences might produce higher levels of playfulness vs. make it difficult to be playful (such as past trauma, not having one’s basic needs for security met, etc.). in the conclusion the authors note that their findings (i.e., that playful people seem to be more able to readily access and use positive coping mechanisms) means that we should be doing more research on how to cultivate playfulness and how to help people unlearn maladaptive coping mechanisms like self-blame. so the point of the study was not to blame individuals or place the responsibility on individual people (“if you could just lighten up, you wouldn’t be so stressed / unhappy / bad at coping!”). it was more like, an attempt to establish that playfulness (as a way of engaging with the world) seems to be associated with all of these positive ways of coping and managing stress, and so we might want to research playfulness more deeply and/or focus on cultivating it in college students.

so i think you are absolutely right that when we talk about playfulness it’s important not to think of it as something that something people just “have” or don’t have (detached from any consideration of people’s backgrounds, lived experiences, etc.). and we also want to avoid pathologizing its absence (“if you don’t have a playful attitude then there’s something wrong/flawed/messed up about you that needs to be fixed”). my research is focused on understanding how we can better create learning environments like the one your singing teacher has created for you -- i.e., spaces where people feel more secure and less vulnerable to scathing or hypercritical judgment; where failures and mistakes are encouraged & normalized as a natural, healthy part of the learning experience; where instructors are modeling self-compassion and deliberately not using shame-based methods; and just in general, where students are getting the kind of gentle, compassionate, consistent messaging you describe receiving from your teacher. basically I’m interested in creating classrooms that provide the stability and consistency people need in order to learn adaptive coping mechanisms that will serve them well outside of those learning spaces.

i think these questions are so important because most college instructors are VERY aware that our students come into our classrooms carrying many different kinds of trauma—whether it’s the more extreme forms that we tend to think of when we think about trauma (childhood abuse, sexual assault, trauma experienced by combat veterans or refugees from warzones), or the forms of pervasive lowgrade trauma associated with financial precarity, racialized stress, etc., or even just the “lighter” or harder-to-classify forms of trauma that rachel naomi remen calls “the cultural shadow” (i.e., the toxic dominant culture that many of us grow up immersed in). and anyone who has taught at the college level (or taught any age level) knows that as a teacher you often have to at least temporarily play aspects of counselor / social worker / person adept at navigating university bureaucracy to help keep students in crisis from slipping through the cracks. (that is obviously NOT ideal, as those roles should be filled by trained professionals! but we have all been in those situations, where you are the first line of support for a student in crisis, or sometimes the last line of support because they have slipped through the giant holes in our country’s social safety nets.)

i think there’s been a shift in recent years towards “trauma-informed pedagogy,” but the slightly watered-down version of this approach many instructors receive tends to be very focused on mitigating harm in the classroom (ie, avoiding certain things or framing material in certain ways so as to avoid re-traumatizing students). this work is obviously HUGELY important (and my own research project is v much informed by it!). but i sometimes feel like these approaches are very damage-centered, ie very focused on understanding how students are “damaged” by their experiences and how we can “prevent further damage” in the classroom space. again, wanting to adopt teaching practices that avoid retraumatizing students is a good thing!!! but i think what i am hoping my work can do is suggest that we can and should strive for more than just limiting damage. to put this another way: i’m looking for ways to go beyond asking “how can we avoid re-traumatizing students in our classrooms?” to thinking more broadly about how we (as teachers, mentors, etc) can design learning environments and learning experiences that help students grow into healthier, happier, more emotionally resilient versions of themselves—and hopefully help build a foundation of social-emotional skills that they will take with them into their adult lives.

play is not the sole "answer” or solution! but i think that for me, it’s been one useful way to think about things like trauma-informed teaching, restorative practices, and social-emotional mentoring strategies, in ways that center a more positive, joyful understanding of what happy and emotionally well-adjusted adulthood can look/feel like. does that make sense?? i think about cultivating playfulness as just one angle onto answering these questions, or as one approach or set of strategies that people could have in their toolkits as they think about how we design learning environments. it won’t work for all students or all teachers or all learning environments, and it won’t solve all of the problems in higher ed (or in a culture where traumatic experiences are so prevalent and yet are so often left unacknowledged and untreated). but i think for me at least it’s been one generative way to reimagine some of the common structures and norms that structure higher ed learning environments.

anyway sorry to use your ask as a springboard into a long “thinking aloud” post!! but i really enjoyed reading your thoughts and i feel like it’s prompted me to articulate some thoughts that have just been sort of murkily floating around in my mind for the last couple weeks. i am also so glad for you that you have a space in your own life (and a trusted teacher figure) where you feel secure & can practice and explore being vulnerable, making mistakes, being silly/playful, etc. it sounds like she is a really wonderful teacher, and it’s so cool too that you are able to describe the ways in which that learning space has felt healing or healthy for you.

[betweenthetimeandsound]

Three Minutes to Eternity: My ESC 250 (#220-211)

#220: Yiannis Dimitras -- Feggari Kalokerino (Greece 1981)

"Κοίτα τον έρημο γυαλό Σου ψιθυρίζω σ’ αγαπώ Τώρα θα χτίσω εκκλησιά Για της αγάπης τα τρελά παιδιά" "Look at the desolate seashore I whisper you “I love you” Now I’ll build a church For the crazy children of love" The opening shot, the rose on the piano, set the stage for such a romantic journey under the summer moon. And the soundscape created through the piano and instrumental throw us into this endearing scene, one which is also tinged with melancholy. Feggari Kalokerino is not only an ode to this beauty, but also an admission of craziness for falling in love. With such pretty lyrics, one can't help but get enveloped in this pretty world, where everything is so beautiful. The combination of Yiannis' singing and the woman's piano playing is also quite cute, albeit with some...interesting undertones to it. Either way, it's classical yet timeless.

Personal ranking: 3rd/20 Actual ranking: 8th/20 in Dublin

#219: Liliane Saint-Pierre -- Soldiers of Love (Belgium 1987)

“Neem elkaars handen Smeed nou die banden toe Hoor je die verre kreet? Geen mens vraagt dat leed” “Take each other’s hands Come on, weld those bonds Do you hear that distant scream? Nobody asks for that suffering” Top ten opening themes of anime, haha. It also helps that "Soldiers of Love" is the English translation for the song "Ai no Senshi" from Sailor Moon (which I've listened to many times but haven't gotten that far into the anime...). That said, Soldiers of Love packs a punch with the instrumentation and the high intensity of the melody. The lyrics are a powerful battle cry, albeit one which advocates for peace amongst people. There’s so much energy and determination in Belgium’s host entry, one would prepare themselves for battle for a good cause. Liliane really delivers this earnestly and with determination, though sometimes the military-style get-up stands out to me the most when I watch it again. Though those two guitarists turning their ends as if they were firing guns is a cool thing to behold.

It's one of the host entries that is better than the song which one it for the country, which is something because J'aime la vie is considered a fan favorite.

Personal ranking: 6th/22 Actual ranking: 11th/22 in Brussels

#218: Beth -- Dime (Spain 2003)

"Cuántas veces te llamé en la noche Cuántas veces te busqué Por mis recuerdos yo vuelvo Y no pierdo la fe" "How many times did I call you in the night? How many times did I look for you? I return for my memories And I don’t lose faith" For some reason, Dime reminds me of "Die for You" from two years earlier--both feature modern pop bops with ethnic influences, both imploring about the state of a relationship (while they both want to make it wor. And they're both in the same key! At the same time, Dime holds its own as one of the strongest 2000s entries from Spain. They had similar flamenco/Latin inspired entries in 2001 and 2004, which were highlights in rather mediocre years because of their uniqueness overall. But the guitar flourishes here work well with the dance beat, and it provides its own fun.

Personal ranking: 3rd/26 Actual ranking: 8th/26 in Riga

#217: Svala -- Paper (Iceland 2017)

“Drawing every bit of my truth Colour me in with your blue” I didn’t actually pay attention to this song in the follow-up to the 2017 contest. I also didn’t watch the semi-finals, which could’ve led to me neglecting the song entirely otherwise, especially I've heard a lot about Blackbird during that time. However, the summer after the contest, I discovered the song and listened to it. And I liked it! (And then I got hooked with Svala's other songs through her different groups) I was interested particularly in the lyrics, which discussed a fight between one’s mental demons and anxiety. I like the English version more than the Icelandic one; the latter is a bit more optimistic on winning against the battle whereas the former really takes the issue seriously. The production, while a bit staid, added to the feeling of helplessness with its electronic coldness. The staging also tries to incorporate this, though it didn't work in making it stand out. (I did like Svala's cape and makeup, though!) While I do love "Hear them Calling" a lot, I had a more interesting journey with Paper--it grew until it became something I highly enjoyed. Personal ranking: 6th/42 Actual ranking: DNQ -- 15th in the first semi-final in Kyiv

#216: Live Report -- Why Do I Always Get it Wrong? (United Kingdom 1989)

“You can do what you want to do now...” Honestly, this has to be one of my favorite British entries ever. While "Go" from the previous year gets a lot of acclaim because of its songwriting and Scott's performance (along with how it ended up second in the end), "Why Do I Always Get it Wrong?" is better on how it envelops a mood and could actually be found from this era (though it sadly didn't do too well commercially afterwards, sigh)

Whenever I do something wrong, or self-hate, this is the song I turn to a lot. The synthesizers drew me in—it fit well with the late 1980s-early 1990s sound elsewhere. It's also helped that Celine performed "Where Does My Heart Beat Now" earlier in the contest, which piqued my interest. And while Ray’s ponytail was a choice, it didn’t distract from how he delivered the song.

Despite getting more 12-points, it ended up losing to Yugoslavia by just six points that year. While not my favorite that year, I think it was the better one of the top three; it equally reflects the times and holds up!

Personal and actual ranking: 2nd/22 in Lausanne

#215: Tommy Nilsson -- En Dag (Sweden 1989)

“En dag vi alla förstår, En dag, när stillheten rår, En dag jag finner din hand, När vägarna möts förstår vi varann,” “One day, we all understand, One day, when silence rules One day, I find your hand When our roads meet, we will understand each other” My two favorites from 1989 are sonically different, diverging between despair and hope. I listen to "Why Do I Always Get it Wrong" a bit more, but "En Dag' would stand out for me in a few different ways, more from being just the optimistic song of the two.

The intro features really good brass, which leads way to the fun instrumental. I like how it builds, and Tommy’s interplay with the backing vocalists is incredibly strong. You get a sense of energy from the both of them as they send the song to new heights.

Basically, it's just glorious!

Personal ranking: 1st/22 Actual ranking: 4th/22 in Lausanne

Final Impressions of 1989: It's a pretty fine year, both in songs in production. There are a number of good songs there, though not many classics which hold out in the long-term (except for Vi maler byen rød, which became famous in Denmark and even became the premise of a musical!). Highlights include an overactive conductor from Turkey, two children, and an awesome interval act involving a crossbow!

#214: Bang -- Stop (Greece 1987)

“Ότι κάνεις για δόξα και λεφτά Δες τι χάνεις, αλλού είναι η χαρά”

“Whatever you do is for fame and money See what you are missing, joy is somewhere else”

I’ve heard this song compared to Wham’s output, especially with its vintage rock-n-roll sound (wake me up before you go go). This doesn’t make it any less bad, with its charming tone and thoughtful lyrics about how a girl who only wants material goods should stop chasing them.

(This is another reason why sometimes, the original-language version is better that any other one--the English version to this song has goes on a completely different tangent)

The performance also falls into vintage aesthetics, with the suits for both Thanos and Vassilis and sock-hop style dresses for the backing vocalists. It's really cute, and the way they dance fits the scene.

On another note, apparently Greeks saw this as a favorite at the time, can someone verify that?

Personal ranking: 5th/22 Actual ranking: 10th/22 in Brussels

#213: Guy Bonnet -- Marie-Blanche (France 1970)

“Nous sommes là dans une douce quiétude Nous avons mis fin à notre solitude Nos corps apprennent de tendres habitudes Et Marie-Blanche est à moi”

“We’re there in a soft stillness We’ve put an end to our loneliness Our bodies learn tender habits And Marie-Blanche is mine”

By 1970, chanson was on its way out; in its place was folk, rock-n-roll (spearheaded in France by Johnny Halladay, who has a great French version of "House of the Rising Sun"), and psychadelia. Within France itself, some of the #1 singles from that year include Comme j'ai toujours envie d'aimer, Let It Be, and Bridge over Troubled Water (a total masterpiece, I tell you).

So, what does one make of Marie-Blanche, in this case?

It's a really sweet love poem, in which Guy declares his love for the girl. and conveys a particularly cute scene. Whenever I listen to this, I envision two lovers cuddling inside while watching the snow fall during the winter. There's a sense of magic and serenity in all this, and the lyrics match the pretty piano melody.

Basically, hits are important to keep the contest alive. But songs like Marie Blanche can pull on the feels in the right ways.

Personal ranking: 2nd/12 Actual ranking: =4th/12 in Amsterdam

#212: Justyna -- Sama (Poland 1995)

“I czuła się tak marnie Poczuła się tak marnie Jakby Bóg, dobry Bóg Nie lubił pcheł..”

“And I feel poor Feeling so poor As if God, the good God Didn’t love little fleas...”

If 1994’s To nie ja represented something classic and hopeful, 1995’s Sama takes it and reverses it. (And in the grand Eurovision timeline, they're only separated by the last song of 1994, Je suis un vrai garcon from France) Instead of a young woman filled with life and singing a decent ballad, we have another one pondering herself, all alone, with nobody to help her.

Also, this is more of an acquired taste with its out-of-tune recordings and Justyna’s scream. But it doesn’t feel out of place within the 1990s, with its alternative influences and production, and I like Sama a lot for that!

Unfortunately, it also caused it to do substantially worse, which is simultaneously explainable and baffling. A good result would've made waves for future Eurovision entries; the 1990s are my favorite decade, but they did misalign quite a bit from the mainstream.

Personal ranking: 7th/23 Actual ranking: 18th/23 in Dublin

#211: The Shadows -- Let Me Be the One (United Kingdom 1975)

"You and I could have an affair/make sweet music, go anywhere"

Isn't this lyric really charming? I couldn't help but have a little giggle because of it; there's a sense of naughtiness (especially with choosing "affair"; are they trying to something illicit?) underneath it.

That said, The Shadows are mainly known for their instrumental rock, but Let Me Be the One has a neat melody line. The rock-n-roll vibe, which could be released within that decade, is light but lovely, and added a jolt of uniqueness to the otherwise poppy contest up to that point. The flubbed line in the beginning ("let me be the one who literally holds you tight", haha) adds to the whole thing, but they were able to carry on, nevertheless.

And while I like all the 1970s winners to some extent, I would switch out "Ding-a-Dong" for Let Me Be the One in terms of winners vs. runners-up; like with Sama, it could've changed the contest in a positive way.

Personal ranking: =3rd/19 Actual ranking: 2nd/19 in Stockholm

[goodtimingz]

dreaming you would come true

intro. pt1. pt2. pt3. pt4. pt5.

AN: check the intro out^, as usual, if jae ever hunts for fic again i’ll cry. btw stream zombie!!!!!! sorry if it’s boring ;-; i have mundane relationship goals and i want to ask my future bf about psychology so if u study psych hmu lol

tags: studentlife, jae day6, fluff, college!au

: the one where you meet jae in your second year of college and it’s basically love at first sight. just little excerpts of what i think a relationship w jae would be like c: 

1.4k words

What can I do? I just like being with you.

Studying Psychology was great, when you were stressed you just pulled out your notes and cried into them. Which is exactly what you felt like doing at that moment, 10pm in the corner of the library. The library was reasonably packed, as it always was during finals. Just a bunch of students trying to cram a semesters worth of knowledge, some successful and others crying in the corner. You weren’t sure which group you fit into, but you were definitely questioning your existence in that moment.

The lanky boy from last week had been meeting you every night since you first met, an unspoken commitment but a consistent one nevertheless. Infact, he should be arriving about… now.

His ruffled hair and tired eyes met yours almost immediately. It had been only a few days but you were smiling at him like he already owned your heart, the smile he sent back making it harder to breathe.

“Yo y/n, what’s with the raccoon eyes, next time I see you are you gonna be in the trash?” No hello, just Jae as usual. You breathed out a sarcastic laugh wondering how he managed to look so casual? His grey hoodie had to be made from a very special material… boyfriend material.

“Ha. Ha, I actually might be though if I drop out and become homeless. Would you still hang out with me if I was a raccoon?” Jae rests his chin in his hands pretending to think it over.

“Well, raccoon’s are cute. I think having a raccoon friend would be pretty fun.” 

“Of course your logic is spot on, good to know I have a home if I really do drop out.”

,

Jae laughs, he wants to reach out and touch your face, brush his hands through your hair and jab you in your sides until you can’t stop laughing. He would do a lot to keep that smile on your face. 

The past few days you two had formed a routine without words, it kind of just happened. Bonding over your love for food, deep conversations and jokes, you two hit it off harder than Brian hitting Wonpil’s cup over in Music class.  Even though Jae had felt like a total simp at first, going to the library with the sole purpose of meeting you the day after the phone drop, he was pleasantly surprised when you swiped half of your stuff to one side of the desk and waved him over.

Every time you smiled at him, he reminded himself to breathe. He had to be alive if he wanted to take you out, so breathing was important even when you made it so damn hard. He wasn’t super affectionate romantically but boy did he want to be now. You plagued his thoughts, at night he craved the feeling of you in his arms, in the day he wondered what it would be like to walk around with your hand in his. At lunch his thoughts drew back to you. One week had been the best torture ever.

“Jae, what are your thoughts on labels?” You perked up from his side, interrupting his thoughts of you as he pretended to scroll through his Ebook.

“Labels? Like boyfriend and girlfriend?” He asked, turning to face you with a teasing grin.

,

“Hmm... similar concept!” You couldn’t help but smile in his direction. I mean… if you would be my boyfriend? You had to physically shake the thought out as Jae watched you with amusement in his eyes. “I mean, for my exam we have to discuss labelling in society, how would you label me?”

“I would label you a panda. You’re cute, you’re clumsy and you’re tired.”

“Jae, I am not clumsy, you can’t say that when you literally tripped up the stairs yesterday!” You pointed, laughing at the image. Had Jae called you cute just then? You tried to overlook it. Cute was something people called pets and small things, maybe he just seen you as small.

“How can you forget that you literally dropped your phone 8 times since we’ve met, and we only hang at night time in one place. You have butter fingers!” He had a point but you shot him a childish glare. So your phone had gone through some hard times, but Jae had literally dropped his when you first met so who was the real butter fingers?

“Don’t you think it’s time for a boba run?” Changing the topic was the only way you’d escape, or it’d be a roast about who was clumsier which would end in you both laughing until everyone around you hated your souls.

“Definitely what I needed to hear.”

And just like that you both packed up your stuff and exited the warm building. With Jae things were exciting even when life felt mundane. You’d catch yourself smiling through your day just thinking about him, and the frequency of that happening just kept increasing.

The night was cold, but you refused to shiver. If you did Jae would probably tease you and say, “I ain’t giving you my hood, equal rights!”. You would then shove him and then he’d shove you. Gosh, he was so childish sometimes and yet you loved it. He knew how to act, he carried himself as this chill guy who never let life get to him, but you knew it did. Sometimes you would hear a groan, a sigh, and you knew life just wasn’t going how he wanted it to. Whenever you asked him questions he would think them over thoroughly, even if his initial response was a joke.

An idle thought crossed your mind. “Jae, what time does the boba shop close?”  You both glanced  as he pulled out his phone, his eyes widening as it read 10:45pm. 

“11pm.” 15minutes till closing and a 20 minute walk? You watched as he tucked his phone away, but you did not expect him to grab your wrist and run. This meant you were literally being dragged along with him, and by the time you arrived at the store (receiving weird glances from the owner), you two were laughing your asses off out of sheer adrenaline. It felt good to run in the cold night together and despite you being out of breath, you managed to squeeze in a few chicken running jokes on the way.

“You’re so short it’s like watching a baby pig run.” Jae teased, poking your cheek and heading to the counter to order.

“Sorry we aren’t all lanky giraffes, Jae.”

“Don’t hate the player hate the game Y/n!” Jae held his hands up in defence with the cutest grin. “What game! Life?” You shoved him gently with a smile, leaning around him to pay for your drink. His hand quickly pushed yours away, tapping his card to pay.

“Hey! We’re both broke what are you doing?” You had no idea what he was thinking. Last time you heard he was complaining about having only $3.20 in his account.

Jae simply smiled in an sickly sweet way, shrugging his shoulders and walking to a seat.

,

He was broke. But he felt rich in soul. Okay, that was extremely cheesy. It’s just the way you laughed while running beside him, it made him feel so alive.

 He cared about you now, no take backs!

You planted a tiny seed in his heart and he was watering it everyday, it grew so fast and he knew it would be hard to get out. You sat across from him gazing around at the decorations of the store mindlessly and he couldn’t stop thinking about how he didn’t want to lose the image of you.

Life had been plain, last week he couldn’t even remember. It all felt the same. Study, play, sleep, eat and repeat. Everyday he was one step closer to stepping out of college, and he really tried hard to enjoy the mundane times of his life. But after a whole year of playing catch up with college work and performing, he thoroughly enjoyed the idea of finally having someone to share it with.

“Jae, you should let me dye your hair.” You looked genuinely excited and slightly evil, hands reaching over to touch Jae’s hair. “It’s kind of dead. That definitely means pink next.” Jae feigned annoyance but he won’t admit he leaned into your touch a liiiiittle.

“What in the world is going through your head to think I would trust you with such a special job. My hair is my image!” He could feel the tips of his ears giving away his chill image.

“Do we need to talk Jae? You know you’re more than your hair. You have a great personality too. I can book you in tomorrow at 9pm.” Your teasing made him reach over and scruff up your hair sending you into giggles.

“We get it Y/N, you’re gonna be a crazy psychologist though.” He laughed, hoping he could be there to see the day you graduate. 

BRO.

Jae needed a good slap. He’d fallen too hard in such a short time, maybe he was just stressed.

(It definitely wasn’t that.)

[ranxiaolong]

Biological Basis of Love

Summary: (Y/N) sighed. Biology. Arguably her least favorite class. Why did she have to take it to graduate? She wanted to be a comp sci major, so why did she have to sit through this class? Just as the dreaded first class of the semester is starting, in stumbles a cute bespectacled blonde. Maybe biology won't be quite as bad as she anticipated.

Hey y'all! I'm back after a rather long break with a new fic! I hope you guys enjoy it!

.

(Y/N) breathed in deeply, the warm air and blue sky soothing. Jeans that were slightly too warm for the weather, some professors notorious for cranking the climate control to arctic blast and she didn’t want to be caught wearing shorts in that unfortunate situation. (Y/N)’s index finger and thumb gripped the collar of her shirt as she trudged along the courtyard, fanning air across her chest with the front of her white t-shirt.

The last days of summer hung upon (Y/N)’s head as she walked over the grassy patch between large brick buildings. The final days of summer, and (Y/N)’s classes had started up again. How she wished she could just lay down on the grass and nap. First week of classes and she already wanted to pass out on the grass.

‘What a fantastic start to the semester.’ (Y/N) thought grimly.

(Y/N) shifted the backpack on her shoulders as she unlocked her phone, checking her class schedule once again.

“Crap, I’m gonna be late!”

(Y/N) picked up her pace, nearly sprinting across campus.

“Why does the bioscience building have to be so far away from my literature class? Why do I need biology? I want to be a software engineer, not stare at cells all day.” (Y/N) grit out as she rounded the corner, nearly tripping as she ran inside of a large white marble building with large letters carved into a slab reading “THE LIFE SCIENCES” above the grandiose mahogany doors.

(Y/N) ran through the halls, eventually making their way to a door, a small plaque reading “LS-145” next to the doorframe. (Y/N) nearly slams the doors as she throws them open, skidding into the lecture hall. It was half empty.

(Y/N)’s eyes raked over the rows of semi filled benches, eventually landing on a frizzy-haired woman writing in a notebook. (Y/N)’s eyes narrowed as she marched through the isles towards the woman tapping the end of her pen against her chin. The woman wore a top with rainbow stripes running down horizontally beneath a faded jean jacket. A pair of sky blue sneakers adorned her feet and a pair of black jeans covered her legs.

The woman glanced upward, realizing (Y/N) was stopped next to her.

“(Y/N)! You made it!” A wide smile plastered itself to the woman’s lips.

(Y/N) glared murderously at the woman who was sitting quite contently.

“Why did you tell me I was late, Bill? I ran halfway across campus for nothing.”

Bill raised an eyebrow, amused. “You are horrible at keeping your schedule. Lucky for you I changed all the class times on that note you have to be early by ten minutes.”

(Y/N) groaned, sliding down onto the bench next to Bill, laying her face on the desk. “But I ran across campus. I don’t run. That was torture. It’s too hot for running.” (Y/N) whined.

A chuckle escaped Bill’s lips. “Well, maybe you’ll find that this class was worth running for.”

(Y/N) scoffed. “Biology is never worth running for. There is no part of the field I want to go into that has to deal with mitochondria or mitosis.”

Bill rolled her eyes. “Well regardless, this is supposed to be the best intro to bio classes. I think even you will manage to enjoy it. I’ve had this professor before and he’s amazing.”

(Y/N)’s eyes narrowed as she faced her friend, “Didn’t you have him for some real obscure class that was, like, not biology in any capacity?”

Bill shrugged, an elbow supporting her arm on the wooden desk as she placed her chin in her palm, “He was still a good professor. Besides, even if you don’t like it, it’s only for your GE requirements. You don’t need to take any more bio classes after this one as long as you pass.”

A soft grunt leaves (Y/N). “I’m not taking this blasted class again. I’m going to barely be able to sit through this semester.”

“Come on, be a little more optimistic. Maybe you’ll like this class.”

“I haven’t liked a bio class since middle school.” (Y/N) closed her eyes, breathing deeply.

Bill ran a few fingers through (Y/N)’s loose hair lazily.

“Must you harass me?” (Y/N) slowly opened an eye, mirth dancing in her iris, contradicting her harsh words.

“Until someone better comes along.” Bill teased back.

(Y/N) closed her eyes again, a soft smile edging on her lips, “You’re impossible.”

As Bill ran her fingers over (Y/N)’s nape, (Y/N) listened to the sound of students slowly shuffling into the large lecture hall. She could identify a few groups of loud groups—a set of boisterous men, a gaggle of giggling freshmen girls, a batch of hooting sports junkies—and was immensely glad when the echo of their voices traveled away from the spot from where she sat.

A sudden slam of the doors opening and a sweeping silence across the room prompted one of your eyes to open. Unable to see from the angle you were at, you let out a long-suffering sigh and sat up, opening your other eye to see down the rows of benches.

Old.

That was the first thing (Y/N) noticed about the man placing a bag on the lectern at the side of the room. First thing she noticed about him after his eyebrows, anyway. He had curly grey hair, but he was tall and lanky. He wore well-fitting clothes, a dark jacket with a red silky material on the inside that stood out against his black vest and pants, the white collar and visible ‘V’ of his shirt starkly contrasting the black as well. Well-polished shoes occasionally clicked across the wooden floor of the stage.

“Morning.” An accent laced his words as he spoke.

So he was Scottish.

“I’m your professor for Introduction to Biology, Malcolm Caecilius.”

(Y/N) leaned over to Bill, whispering, “I was expecting something a bit different from that. Not something that sounds and looks like some bloke they dug up from Pompeii.”

Bill lightly hit (Y/N)’s shoulder.

“Ow.” 

“This course will mostly be run by an assistant professor.”

Bill sat up, her eyebrows furrowed. “That’s new. He generally doesn’t like having other people teach his class.”

You pulled out a notebook and a pen, flipping it open to the first blank page to start notes.

A sudden thump at the door and it having been thrown open in haste caught the attention of nearly the entire room. Professor Caecilius didn’t look up from his bag. A blonde woman stumbled into the room, a yelp on her lips as she barely caught her balance.

(Y/N)’s breath caught in her throat.

The mystery woman’s hair was short, slightly curling in at the ends towards her face. A pair of rounded square glasses sat on the bridge of her nose, the wide black frames slowly slipping down her face. As she stumbled across the stage, a few loose papers flew from the large stack in her arms. She wore a pair of jeans and a dark navy button-up shirt.

She set the stack of papers down on the desk before rushing back to pick up the papers that had fallen in her hurry.

(Y/N) heard a low whistle.

“She’s your type.”

(Y/N) nearly choked, barely covering a cough, “Bill!” She hissed out.

“I’m not wrong. Ditzy, airhead.” As Bill added to the list she counted them off on her fingers.

“Hey!” (Y/N) hissed.

Bill snickered. “You gonna have trouble paying attention?”

“What?”

Bill grinned. “I mean, you’re definitely going to be paying attention to her, but I meant the content of the class.”

A flush spread across (Y/N)’s cheeks. “I—”

“Should I make arrangements for you? Help you get a hot date with the TA?”

(Y/N) managed to huff defiantly, the impact substantially subdued due to her red face. “Oh shut up.”

Professor Caecilius finished rooting through his bag, writing his name across the wide black chalkboard in white chalk, ‘Biology 101’ written beneath. “Due to last-minute reshuffling of staff, you’ll be receiving lecture from Jane Smith. I will be ultimately in charge of the course, but she will be lecturing a sizable portion of it.”

The woman seemed to nearly jump as her name was mentioned while picking up the flyaway papers from the floor. She quickly stood up, facing the students whose attention all shifted to her. Her eyes seemed to dart back to Professor Caecilius before she cleared her throat. “Hello, I’m Jane Smith. I’ll be your lecturer for this semester. I do hope we get on.”

(Y/N) clicked her tongue. The universe must be conspiring against her. There were far too many good qualities about this woman. Cute looks, cute accent, cute demeanor. (Y/N) suppressed a sigh. The least the universe could have done was give her a tolerable professor who was decent at teaching. She didn’t need any more trouble passing bio than she knew she was going to have. 

Well, maybe she’d be an asshole when grading. There was always hope for that.

Jane picked up a much smaller stack of paper, significantly more manageable than the entirety of the stack she barged into the room with, and started towards the end of the first row of seats. “Uhmm, I’ll be passing the syllabus out at the end of each row, so please pass it down the rest of the way. Please tell me if there aren’t enough.”

As the stack of papers reached (Y/N), she took one from the stack, passing it along to Bill. (Y/N) flipped through the packet, further deflating. The grading system didn’t seem too unfairly skewed towards exams. Good for her in the sense that she wouldn’t fail and need to retake it if the section wasn’t purely exam-based, but not so great in that it didn’t make the lecturer any less appealing.

(Y/N) slouched in her seat.

“We’ll be going over the syllabus today. I know you’ve received this speech all week, so I’ll make quick work of the basics...”

(Y/N) flipped through the packet occasionally zoning out. At the end of the day, syllabuses were pretty much the same. Go over grading, no eating in class, if you cheat you fail the class and it’s put on your file. Nearly a full hour of the hour and a half lecture time was eaten up by the professor going over the syllabus and answering questions pertaining to it. (Y/N) was slightly surprised that Professor Caecilius managed to wrap up all syllabus related content before the end of the class session. Many other previous professors made no issue of extending deep dives of their syllabus to fill the length of their two or three-hour lecture. Honestly, they could just say use a pen on all assignments in one place instead of reiterating it in every single section of the syllabus.

“Right. Now if there are no more questions, I’m going to have you all turn to your neighbor and introduce yourselves. You will benefit greatly from having connections in this class if you need help when neither I nor Dr. Smith is available.”

As introductory chatter began to break out (Y/N) turned towards Bill, wiggling her eyebrows. “Nice to meet you, beautiful.” 

Bill promptly pinched (Y/N)’s nose.

“I camp breeb.”

“You could try not being annoying. That might help your situation.”

“Bub ‘ou lub me anyway.”

“Hmmm. Not totally sure about that.” 

Bill let go of her grasp on (Y/N)’s nose and (Y/N) took in an exaggerated breath of air. “I have been freed.”

Bill rolled her eyes, “Maybe go introduce yourself to somebody new. You need more friends anyway.”

(Y/N) blew a raspberry at her so-called friend before turning to her right, the brown woman seated next to (Y/N) wrapping up her conversation with the lanky man seated on her other side. The stranger turned her torso to face (Y/N), chocolate eyes flicking across (Y/N)’s face quickly before extending her hand.

“Hello, I’m Yasmin Khan.”

(Y/N) took her hand in a firm grasp, “I’m (Y/N). Nice to meet you, Yasmin.” (Y/N) shook Yasmin’s hand, “So what are you here for? Major?”

Yasmin scratched the back of her head. “I’m mostly trying to get bio out of the way. I have to take quite a few of these to be a police officer.”

(Y/N)'s eyes lit up in interest, a wide grin on her lips, “A police officer, huh? Well, I think you’d make a fine cop miss Khan.”

She smiled gratefully at the grinning student. “Thanks. How about you?”

(Y/N) chuckled, “Computer science. Hoping to be a software engineer if I make it out of here alive.”

A soft snort left Yasmin. “I feel the two of us are in a similar boat, then. Want to exchange contacts for the semester? I’ve heard good things about this professor, but always a good idea to have a classmate to contact just in case.”

“And here I was thinking I’d have to ask first.”

Yaz just shook her head and smiled as she pulled out her phone, “Oh, actually. While we’re at it, this bloke next to me,” Yasmin lightly batted at the arm of the man next to her, “this is Ryan. He’s mostly here ‘cause I dragged him along.”

(Y/N) waved, “Nice to meet you.”

The man turned from his conversation with the person seated behind him to face (Y/N) briefly, “Nice to meet you, too. Have Yaz give you my contact.” Ryan turned back to his conversation with the brunette man.

Yasmin rolled her eyes, “I’ll give you his number.”

(Y/N) pulled out her phone, reciting the digits for Yasmin to type in. She quickly entered the number, typed a quick message, then sent it to (Y/N)’s phone which pinged lightly as soon as it received the message. As (Y/N) was attaching Yasmin’s name to the phone number, Professor Caecilius drew attention to the front of the room.

“Now wrap up your conversations, I have a few last announcements before I let you all go. I’ve taken the time to gather some campus resources and are in the back of the syllabus packet, but I would highly recommend finding additional resources.” Professor Caecilius approached a podium near the door, a stack of papers sitting atop, “Your first assignment is to fill out a small packet that I have at the front of the room, so take one on your way out. I will be in my office if you have any individual questions. Class dismissed.”

Yasmin turned to (Y/N) “Well, see you next class, yeah?”

(Y/N) grinned loosely, “Yep, see you next class, Yasmin.”

The woman stood up and waved a quick farewell, turning to exit. She joined up with her friend, Ryan already at the end of the row chatting with another man, before leaving the lecture hall. 

Students quickly emptied out of the lecture hall, quite a few flocking to Professor Caecilius before he left, taking a copy of the homework packet as they exited the room. The professor announced he would be taking the rest of the questions back at his office, and the small pack of remaining students followed him eagerly out the door. (Y/N) slowly descended the stairs with Bill, in no rush to get to their next classes.

“See, it wasn’t that bad.” Bill raised an eyebrow at her companion,

(Y/N) rolled her eyes, “It was syllabus day, the worst offense syllabus day usually has is being boring as all heck.”

Bill sighed as both women reached the bottom of the stairs. She glanced across the stage, lightly nudging (Y/N) with her shoulder. “Gonna shoot your shot?”

“Huh?” (Y/N)’s eyebrows drew together in confusion, turning her head when Bill nodded in a direction across the room. A soft groan followed by a withering glance was aimed at Bill. “You can’t be serious?”

Bill only grinned in return, “I’ll grab you a packet. If nothing else at least introduce yourself. It’s good practice to get in the lecturer’s good books anyways.”

(Y/N) blew a soft raspberry at Bill, a sigh leaving her lips as she trudged towards the woman organizing papers on a wide podium. (Y/N) hesitated before stepping onto the stage, unsure if she should clear her throat or offer some sort of signal that she was going to initiate conversation. She pursed her lips and stepped onto the stage, light, carefully placed steps until she stood approximately two meters away from the assistant professor.

(Y/N) hesitated once more, shook her head, and stepped forward, clearing her throat from behind Jane, “Excuse me?”

A small squeak and a slight jump of Jane’s shoulders followed, “Oh, yes, hold on just a moment.”

Jane tapped the bottom of the stack of papers in her hand against the flat of the desk before turning around. Her eyes seemed to widen as she turned around, fumbling slightly with the papers in her hands. 

Easily startled, (Y/N) presumed.

The lecturer seemed to stop, a sort of lost expression painted across her features, eyebrows drawn together. Her gaze flickered back to (Y/N), seemingly lost in thought. Jane quickly snapped out of whatever internal musing she was going through, quickly nodding her head slightly, hand flying up to adjust the temples of her glasses, “I’m Jane.”

“I know,” (Y/N) immediately winced as the words left her mouth. Smooth, (L/N). “You introduced yourself at the beginning of class. Sorry, not good with words.” (Y/N) clarified, “I’m (Y/N).”

Jane chuckled nervously, brushing her hair behind her ear. (Y/N) noticed star-shaped earrings adorning Jane’s ear, the chain connected to a cuff glinting slightly. 

Cute.

“Err, well I look forward to the semester.” Unsure what to say, (Y/N) rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly. “Admittedly bio isn’t my strongest subject so I may be coming to office hours quite a bit.”

Jane fiddled with her glasses, eyes darting from the undergrad to the wall, uncertain what to say. Before she had time to process her words mentally, they spilled from her lips, “Well, be like 8.5 percent of the human population’s blood type and B positive.”

(Y/N) blinked. She had no response.

“You know because B positive is—”

“Yeah, I got it.”

(Y/N) bit her lip, trying hard to suppress a smile and a groan. The joke was just so bad. 

Jane was back to fiddling with her plastic frames.

Silence.

“Right, I just wanted to introduce myself. I look forward to this semester!” (Y/N) practically shouted before dashing out of the room. (Y/N) caught Jane’s eyes widening in alarm at her sudden exclamation as she rushed out of the room, grabbing Bill’s arm and dragging her along in the process. As soon as (Y/N) made her way into the hall and far enough away from the double doors she groaned.

Bill barely managed to suppress a yelp as (Y/N) grabbed her arm in her rush out the door. As (Y/N)’s brisk pace steadily slowed she loosened her grip on Bill’s arm. Bill raised an eyebrow at (Y/N) as her arm was released, able to walk properly and not being half dragged down the hallway. She matched her steps with her friend.

Bill’s elbow lightly jabbed against (Y/N)’s side. “Smooth.”

“Shut up!” (Y/N) hissed, the burning in her cheeks still not subsided.

How she was going to survive the rest of the semester, (Y/N) had no idea.

.

Thank you fo reading!!

[gzteacher]

Overworked [TL;DR]

[TL;DR Version]: Finally worked up the courage to tell my supervisor that my workload was too much. We’ll see if anything can be worked out. I’m all-or-nothing at this point.

[Full Version - it’s very very very long]

I’m at a school that’s only been around for going on two years now, and most teachers teach 1 to 3 courses distributed through 12 to 14 classes per week.

And then there’s MY schedule...

I teach 8 courese; 18 classes a week.  - Grade 7 Reading Essentials: For kids who can’t read at all, as in this is class were we learn how to sound out words, break down compound words, recognize prefixes and suffixes, and course read material designed for American 8~9 year olds. I’m not mentioning this to be facetious but to be informative. The school originally wanted me to teacher them AP Literature. Yeah. A bunch of 12year-old non-native English speaking, never-been-immersed-in-WesternEuropean-culture 12 year olds suddenly analyzing the structure and language of Maupassant’s The Necklace. Anyway.

- Grade 9 Intro to Literature: I’ll explain why there’s no Grade 8 here later. If you’re up for a long ass read, of course) Intro to Literature (This is of course, after they’ve learned how to do basic comprehension. This course works on recognizing figures of speech and rhetorical devices, plus it looks at easy-to-read works - yes they exist... it took some digging, but indeed they exist - placed against historical, cultural and thematic backgrounds

- Grade 8+9 IGCSE English Language A: I asked my British friends about this and they all agree that Grade 8+9 (age 13~14) is way too young to be signing up for Pearson Edexcel IGCSE especially with them speaking a language that has very little if any similarity to English, unless the students have lived extensively in a Western country, which these students have not.

- Grade 10 ALevel Literature: I only have this class once a week yet am expected to prepare them for ALevel Lit. This once-a-week class versus their more prominent ALevel Chemistry and Physics. *sigh*

- Grade 10 PreAP Literature and Composition: Only because this is my first year teaching and these student’s have no background with literature. It’s basically a faster moving Grade 9 course, but it focuses on FRQ section of the exam wherein you have to have read an actual novel. Novels in this class are actually just short stories in which I have to make vocabulary lists of because the students won’t make it through a page unless they translate every other word.

- Grade 11 AP Literature and Composition: I actually managed to talk the students OUT of signing up for this exam unless they’ve really enjoy reading and can think and question things as they read. Their TOEFL Reading classes do a great job of teaching them reading comprehension. Unfortunately, AP Lit does not test your ability to search for answers directly within text, so that’s where this class comes in. The learning curve been Grade 10 and 11 here is such that the stories and poems we look at in Grade 10 are too easy for Grade 11 and the Grade 11 works are often too difficult for Grade 10. There is very little, if any, overlap.

- Grade 11 AP Psychology: One 3 hour course every Monday afternoon. It’s a nightmare especially considering how the worksheets assigned throughout the week to help them review things more often then not don’t get done. The extra materials, video links, online notes, cheat sheets, etc go ignored because apparently the stuff only makes sense when I’m standing in front of them modelling everything for them. The school expects all the students to take the exam and for me to analyze their scores once CollegeBoard releases them.

- Drama: We meet once a week, assuming students haven’t been pulled out to do tutoring sessions for Calculus. The school expects a drama performance at the end of the term.

It was becoming more and more difficult to manage these classes until I finally realized I was burning out. (I’m terrible at recognizing burnout.) The moment I would shift my attention to one course, the performance of another course would suffer. Students from whatever class would complain that they aren’t “doing enough” or that they haven’t gotten their homework or exams back yet. (There’s still a large pile of ungraded papers on my desk as we speak... I could be grading them, but yeah. That.)

Now.

Originally, this list was all just “AP Literature, plus IGCSE, Psychology and Drama” with addition to U.S. and World History. After some arguing, I managed to get the history courese removed from my schedule as well as Grade 8 “Literature” (the classes that I didn’t want ended up begin given to the teacher the school was planning of firing BECAUSE the principal - who knows me from a previous school - found out I would be teaching there).

I did try teaching every Literature class the exact same way to save time, printing, planning, etc. I knew it would be challenging, but it was either they double up and put forth the effort to master difficult material, or I split myself into multiple parts and water Western Lit down into something approachable and digestible. They all started out with recognizing the basic forms of Literature: peotry, prose and drama. Yes, I made a worksheet to let them practice identifying which description fit which type of literature, just to make sure they were following me because you can never know when the students are dead silent before, during and after classes.

Then we moved on to Robert Frost and Emily Dickinson - easy reads with a couple vocabularly cheat sheets and translation references. Then the struggling happened and as predicted, the lower the grade, the more the struggle. I decided then to re-up the entire “Literature” course and instead create a course that was appropriate for the students’ level.

I will say the one good thing that comes out of the being the only teacher who has to see EVERY. SINGLE. STUDENT through the span of a week is that as a significantly unique-looking FOREIGNER from a particularly diverse cultural background, generally socially aware, and is fluent in Chinese, it has become useful in whipping these kids in to shape in terms of their cultural awareness and mannerisms. If you’re a foreigner in China worried about local kids picking at you, making snarky remarks around you, flat out insulting you in Chinese or just being “weird” around you, you won’t have to worry about that at all with these kids. The principal knows that, I’m sure this was one of the reasons she brought me around. The school is one of those internationalized jawns where the students get offers from Western universities come their Grade11/Grade12 year. It helps to not end up overseas still making dumb comments about someone’s nose and then looking crazy when they call you out on it. Go figure.

The school is mad shy with admitting they have me teacher 8 courses. They won’t admit it right away because in their minds, I teach “Literature, Psychology, and Drama... 3 courses” but then they wonder how I manage to go through so many copies, and they pretend they don’t notice the eight stacks of exam papers that all have my name on them during midterms and finals. It’s contract renewal time, and I basically told the powers that be that they either need to pay extra, hire more staff to distribute these courses more sensibly or it’s boots for me. I’m losing hair and self-care time being the only one at this school who would need 3 or 4 people to replace me should I leave. 

[adcres]

         howdy hey , pardnerrrs :> i’m rox ( she / her ) ‘n i’ll be playing yr residential sullen broodin’ boy , nico . i didn’t have the time to write out a whole new intro , given that i have back to back classes again today :-’( , so please forgive me for recycling his old intro akawodkgrsd ; . that being said , i did tweak around some tingz and i updated his wcs for him , so if yr down to clown around just hmu on my discord :   𝔰𝔴𝔢𝔢𝔱 𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔪𝔫𝔦𝔞#2854 !  okie okie , i’ll shut da eff up now ♡ 

BASICS.

༉‧₊˚✧ kim taehyung , cis man , he / him / his — did you see that nicholas “nico” yoon was trending last night ? the twenty three year old street artist has been getting a lot of press lately . i think it’s due to them being so + quixotic & + free-spirited , but i always thought they seemed - withdrawn & - sybaritic . their fans always say they remind them of soft smoke rings spun in a dreamy haze , silver-ringed fingers rapping against polished oak , and waning light refracting against broken glass though . i wonder if they’ve found out about REDACTED yet … i guess we’ll have to wait and see . [ rox , 22 , pst , she / her , none ]

PINTEREST & PLAYLIST .

01 and 02 .

PERSONALITY .

at first glance , nico reads as this aloof , arrogant type that doesn’t like to associate w the common public . always keeping the majority of people at a comfortable distance , nico moves almost exclusively within his own social network , and doesn’t like to deviate from what he knows best .  

not so much pretentious as he is lazy , making an effort to socialize with complete strangers is simply something that nico would never do . hehe ... he’s kind of shy like that .... ♡ though he’d literally never admit it ♡

despite giving the impression that he’s some intimidating and chronically indifferent kind of guy , nico is genuinely a sweet boy — ‏‏‎ one who’s in a constant state of confusion as to why people seem to be so scared of him . it always comes as a shock when close friends of his admit that they thought he absolutely hated their guts when they first met him .

b/c tho he’s p smart , nico is very oblivious at times , and he’s 100% the kind of guy who’ll walk away from a conversation thinking he did a rly rly good job trying to make a friend ... when in reality he prob said four words in the span of thirty minutes smh .

overall , nico’s a private person , especially with what he’s thinking ... and it’s really hard to get a clear read on what’s on his mind . sharing his feelings has never been one of nico’s interests b/c he just genuinely doesn’t think whatever he has to say is rly worth mentioning . so he usually just shuts da fuck up n lets other ppl talk so he can mentally gain the strength to continue socializing .

push nico’s buttons enough tho ‘n you’ll catch this mf speaking in full sentences .

lastly , it should b noted that nico is a romantic through n through ... this mf probably d*ed in the victorian era ‘n got reincarnated b/c he’s got that ‘ lets share furtive glances across the room but never say a thing to each other  ‘ thing on lock . mr. darcy headass

and while nico might play the role of long-suffering , ever pining lover to a T , he’s more in love w / the idea of love than he is w / any single person . and he literally cannot hold down a relationship w/o fucking it up for himself in some shape or form .

kind of sarcastic ... v much the teasing type .... 

can b very impulsive at times , loves to go on solo adventures at night , prefers his own company tbh ...

overview : melancholic , reticent , noncommittal , humble , mild-mannered , romantic .

a mix of : josh from clueless and j.d. from heathers

more here .

MORE AESTHETICS.

the chill of silver jewelry against flushed skin , forgotten graffiti on porcelain sinks , flickering motel lights , kisses sticky with vodka , eyes ringed with lavender , sleepless nights surrendered to the dull buzz of television , obscure art house films , sun-kissed cheeks , the surprise of summer rain , chest aching with lost loves , scattered baby’s breath and rosemary , and a shared smile between perfect strangers .

CHARACTER DISSERTATION.

nico was born on a brisk wintry morning in the fashion district of los angeles ( january 21st , 1997 ) to a family of six .

as the second youngest child , and the only male son to boot , nico grew up with his only inheritance being a generational kind of hunger , one that demanded for more than what his struggling parents could offer

the arts stole nico at an early age ... ushering him into a world of creation and freedom beyond the four bleak walls he daily occupied . from spending lonely summers tucked away in some forgotten corner in the library to practicing on a borrowed violin from dawn to dusk , nico knew that even with nothing at his disposal , there was always something to be made w/ the tools he’d been given  

despite not having the money for private tutors to hone their son’s growing artistic talents , his parents did whatever they could to support his dreams , whether that meant working double shifts back to back or scrounging for loose change underneath the sofa cushions to pay for whatever materials nico needed .

it was in this strange way that nico grew up p spoiled . somehow having nothing while also having absolutely everything at the same time .

very much a family man , the first big purchase nico made once he broke out in hollywood was a house in beverly hills for his parents . now that he’s finally at a place where he can take care of his family , nico makes sure that his parents and sisters want for nothing

while he showers everyone else with generous gifts and obscene amounts of money , nico doesn’t particularly feel comfortable doing the same for himself . he’s a simple man through n through . one who’s content to spend his time walking his dog late at night , listening to a podcast on his airpods , instead of going out to a club w/ other well-known socialites .

a true artist at heart , nico refuses to conform to the current trends of hollywood , instead insisting on wearing thrifted clothes to important galas — ‏‏‎much to the frustration of his PR team and the chagrin of his stylists . but none of the choices nico makes seems to surprise anyone anymore . driving flashy cars and wearing designer clothes has never really been his style , after all . and it’s important to him that he remain authentically himself despite everything .

WANTED CONNECTS.

pr relationship ( open ) : someone that nico is contractually obligated to date ... i could totally see there being drama ‘n tension from having to pretend to actually like each other ... would b better if they rly did not like each other at all ... 

fwb ( open ) : buddies who bump uglies sometimes ... they both agreed they’d never catch feelings for each other but we’ll see ... 

frenemies ( open ) : someone that grinds nico’s gears but they’re a friend of his friend ... so they’re forced to keep it civil . i can see them exchanging hateful comments in the back of their friend’s car while simultaneously posting pics of each other on ig to keep up the rouse . 

unrequited crush ( open ) : likely nico would not realize if yr muse had a crush on them ... but it’d be fun to play it out like a kdrama anyway heh heh

a close friend group ( open / any ) : i thought it’d b so cute if there was like a small group of friends , maybe 3-4 ppl , that do stupid shit like ditch going to celebrity after-parties to break into abandoned buildings , get real high , ask stupid ‘ would u rather ‘ questions , and do sum main character type shit ... yk what im puttin down ... ‘n nico is def the type to open up in the presence of extroverts so i think having a group of wild outsiders of diff bgs would b v inch resting ..

enemies / rivals ( open / any ) : tbh nico prob rubs ppl the wrong way since he has resting bitch face ‘n never wants to talk to anyone .. so im sure there r ppl who just do not like this mf ... and rest assured that the feeling is mutual ...

bad / good influence ( open / any ) : nico’s known to mount his high horse often ... mr morality over here ... so i just know he prob would butt heads w/ the residential troublemaker . tho nico’s artwork can be controversial and out of the box at times , his art style and his personality are at constant odds , and it’d b interesting to have that bad influence / good influence dynamic w/ someone .

family friend ( open ) : someone who grew up w/ nico in dtla ... couldve gone to the same public school as him ... or their families couldve gone to the same church ...

ok my intro post has become a fucking behemoth so im going to stop here ‘n just say i have so many more wcs in mind so if u wanna plot lets just talk hehe :>

[how-to-portuguese]

Review of Practice Portuguese Paid Content

The Practice Portuguese team produce a lot of amazing free content on YouTube, their podcast, and their website. But is their paid platform good value for money?

I finally decided to pay for a one-month subscription to access the Practice Portuguese paid content. I give my initial thoughts on the pros and cons below.

(Disclaimer: this post was originally written in Jan 2021, but was added to my queue to post at a later date. The current prices and content may differ.)

What the platform offers

Pros

The scope of the content

The platform has very solid A1-B1 content and is expanding their B2+ content. It currently gives at least an introduction to every verb conjugation, which will get you through B1 and started with B2. Their introductory and elementary material is definitely more developed than their intermediate and advanced material, but they are also expanding their content as their community grows. They seem receptive to suggestions and the needs of their users, so it might be a good time to get involved in their online community to help shape the way that the platform evolves.

Quality of the content

The website has very clear and extremely detailed explanations. The learning notes are WAY more detailed than grammar explanations on DuoLingo. In particular, I think they have very good lessons on clitic and tonic pronouns, including rules of when to include the clitic pronoun before, after, and in the middle of the verb. They also have great lessons and learning notes on pronunciation, including a whole lesson dedicated to open vs closed vowels with examples of minimal pairs and homophones (with audio recordings).

Plenty of audio content

Every word or phrase in Portuguese has an audio recording. Simply hover above the word or phrase, and you will see a speaker icon to play the recording and a turtle icon to slow down the recording. They use a variety of native speakers in their lessons, so you will hear multiple accents of Portugal. They also have a mix of clear recordings and recordings with background noise (e.g., in a café or train station). There is always an additional clear recording is always available when they have audio content with background noise. This is all in addition to their free audio content on YouTube, their podcast, and their social media accounts. With the combination of paid and free content, it is definitely possible to develop solid listening skills.

Verb conjugation practice

There is a section of the website where you can practice verb conjugations. You can practice each tense individually, a combination of indicative (past, present, future), a combination of conjunctive and imperative, or a combination of all verb tenses. It provides all the benefits of flashcard apps without having to make the content yourself.

Multiple ways of reviewing material

You can revisit each lesson as many times as you need, the platform automatically creates flashcards as you start more lessons, and you can review in quiz mode if you prefer this to flashcards. They have a smart review feature that adapts to how well you have mastered a word or phrase. You can also manually manage the words and phrase that you review by moving them between "short term memory", "long term memory", "mastered" the lists and you can remove them from all lists. The app is focused on mastery and not gamification, so you won’t get constant notifications or lose progress on basic content just because the app wants to keep your level of engagement high.

Full access to all the content

Once you purchase access to the platform, you can click through all content and do lessons out of order. You don't have to unlock levels or master a concept before moving on to the next. This allows you to focus material you need to know and learn at your own pace. This is a nice experience for those who already have some knowledge of portuguese and don't want to go through another set of introductory lessons just to get to the elementary and intermediate content.

Tailored for expats, not tourists

A lot of online introductory material is tailored for tourists, who only need very superficial knowledge of Portugal. This platform includes grammar and vocabulary lessons tailored for immigrants (e.g., immigration office, getting residency, renting an apartment, buying a house, etc.) AND lots of lessons around culture, which is good for those who are interested in studying or living in Portugal. The platform includes so many idiomatic expressions and interjections!

Building a community, not just a platform

There is a pretty active forum for paid members. Members can ask questions and comment on individual lessons. Overall, this is similar to the DuoLingo forum. However, when I tried to ask questions or comment on EP vs BP differences on the DuoLingo forum, it was not well received. Some people were quite hostile, with at least one person saying that all the best American universities teach Brazilian Portuguese so there’s no point trying to learn European Portuguese. This was really disheartening, so I quickly stopped posting and it set me back at an early stage of my studies. I think it would have been really valuable to have a supportive community specifically dedicated to EP, so new language learners would really benefit from this.

No ads, no gamification

In my experience, gamification doesn’t make something more fun. It just feels like a poor attempt to generate more advertising revenue or incentivise you to buy add-ons or purchase a paid version. I like having a sense of completing something to mastery, so gamification that results in constantly losing lives, losing progress on lower levels, having to redo an entire tree five times, and being sent constant notifications to practice actually makes me want to use the app less.

The Practice Portuguese platform doesn’t have any of this. No gamification. No ads. Just mastery of topics you want to study, at your own pace, with no added pressure. It is much more affordable than a lot of other paid language-learning software. I am working full-time now, so I am in a position where I am able to pay for this. And I definitely appreciate the ad-free environment that focuses on learning and not getting users to spend more money.

Good value for money

Can get you from A0-B1 (with some intro to B2 content) for €15 a month or €153 if you buy an annual subscription (15% discount). This is far cheaper than any classes or private lessons I have paid for myself or seen elsewhere, and it is much cheaper than most other paid language-learning software. For basically the price of a monthly streaming service, you get unlimited access to the platform with no limit on the number of devices you can use.

Cons

Note: Not all of these are inherently cons or things that I think Practice Portuguese should change. This post is more of a discussion of what is and is not available on the platform. The platform does have cons if you are looking for specific tools or features that are not offered.

Content is paid with no free trial

The paid content does not come with a free trial. Practice Portuguese is a small company with a small team AND they produce a ton of free content, so I get it. They need some source of revenue to support content production and web hosting.

But, some people may be hesistant to commit to a subscription without knowing what they will be getting first. Honestly, one of the main reasons I didn't sign up sooner is that I wasn't sure if they would have lessons dedicated to learners at the B2 (or higher) level. I was also somewhat concerned about the quality of the content, given the poor quality of so many of the other European Portuguese apps. After seeing the Practice Portuguese team consistently produce high-quality free content, I decided to give the paid platform a try.

They offer a €15 one-month subscription that automatically renews each month. This is what I went for just to get an overview of the content. The website says that they will refund you within the first 30 days if you want to cancel, but I can't say anything about how smooth this process is yet. They also allow you to cancel the monthly subscription at any time.

If I decide to keep using this tool (which is highly likely at this point), then I plan to cancel the one-month subscription and will then purchase the annual subscription to take advantage of the 15% discount. Hopefully, they will have a more elegant and cost effective way to transition from a trial to a full membership in the future.

Elementary lessons may contain some advanced content

At times, more advanced content is sometimes included in elementary lessons. For example, all of the rules on clitic pronouns are included in one lesson, which is placed just after the lesson on the past continuous tense. This is fine for simple clitics, but you need to know future indicative and conditional verbs for some of the clitic pronoun uses in the lesson. Users don't learn about these verb tenses until after the lesson on clitic pronouns.

I think this is something that the Practice Portuguese team could change that would improve the learning experience. Learning about clitic pronouns in general can be quite overwhelming, and this lesson could be very overwhelming for those who are learning entirely through the Practice Portuguese platform.

You can always go through the easier parts of the lesson and then come back at a later stage, but I know that I like the feeling of completing a lesson in its entirely and feel frustrated or disappointed when I am not able to do so. Users might benefit from two separate lessons on clitics placed at different learning stages.

Limited speaking practice

Like DuoLingo, each lesson has a section that ask you read a phrase out loud. You can compare your recording to a recodring by a native speaker. The system also evaluates your pronunciation and gives you a score from 0-100%. I always wonder how good these are systems are at actually detecting the accuracy of the pronunciation. Are they merely the aural equivalent to Just Dance and Sing Party? OR do they actually work?

These types of lessons also don't work as well for those with speech impediments. I have a bit of a lisp, and I always do poorly on exercises when there are a lot of S and Z sounds. I know my S and Z sounds aren’t correct. I’m more concerned with whether my open and closed vowels, lh's, etc. need to be improved. The 0-100% scale simply isn't going to convey this information in the same way an interaction with a native speaker would.

These kinds of exercises are also not going to prepare for you an actual conversation. Being able to compare your recording to the official recording very useful when you are getting started with a language. But, it is possible to have excellent pronunciation but terrible conversational skills. If you mostly just want to improve your conversation skills, this particular platform isn't right for you.

No option for a private tutor

The Practice Portuguese platform does not offer private tutors or private lessons. I don't think this options would fit well with the current aim of their platform, so I also wouldn't expect the Practice Portuguese team to change this. But, if you are looking for private lessons or having access to a private tutor, then this isn't this tool for you.

The Practice Portuguese team do engage the users in their YouTube videos and podcasts, and they occasionally post to the forum. But, don't expect them to be heavily involved in your day-to-day study. The platform is designed to develop a strong community base. Users can post questions and comments on each lesson (similar to DuoLingo's desktop site) and there is a discussion forum, so you will probably get your questions answered by community members at some point.

No CEFR levels, No test prep

The Practice Portuguese platform is not designed to be test prep for any of the exams certifying proficiency in Standard European Portuguese as a second language. If this is what you're looking for, then the Practice Portuguese platform may not be what you need. It is probably a good tool to supplement your test prep, but the platform is not designed around the language exams.

Unless you are very familiar with the content of the exams themselves, you will probably not know the CEFR level you are at. The content is designed to be continuous, and the site doesn't have any numeric measure of progress or proficiency (no crowns, no arbitrary scores, no CEFR levels, etc.). However, I can see why some people prefer having a levels system or may want to know the exact CEFR level they are working towards.

It seems like most apps use these measures of progress as ways to gamify the app in order to increase the monetisation. For me, it is a relief to be able to learn casually without feeling the pressure of leveling up or facing the threat of moving down a level or losing progress if I don't use the app enough. So, while not having levels or test prep may be a con, there is also the trade-off of not having excessive monetisation / gamification.

Limited B2+ content

The content for advanced learners (CEFR B2 and higher) is pretty limited at the moment. The team is continually expanding the content, so this is likely to change in the future. For example, they added lessons on the o modo conjuntivo in July 2020. These are pretty basic lessons, and they could add more content on various uses of the conjunctive form so their users can build more solid B2 skills (e.g. conjunctions + conjunctive). There are also no lessons on pretérito mais-que-perfeito, which is necessary for C1 and C2 learners.

I am trying to reach a more solid B2 level, and so I think the platform will be a good way to solidify my grammar skills while also providing a refresher for grammar skills that might have forgotten. I am also happy to see the section with verb conjugation practice. I have exposure to all of the conjugations, but I definitely need more practice to be able to use them more fluently in practice.

But, I don't think I could use the Practice Portuguese platform alone to pass a B2 (or higher) language exam. There would definitely need to be more advanced content.

[murasaki-murasame]

Thoughts on Fruits Basket 2019 2nd Season Ep6: “Are You Stupid?”

In an extremely shocking turn of events, this episode adapts THREE chapters of the manga, instead of two!

Oh and also the beach arc started I guess lol

Thoughts under the cut.

I really have to stop trying to guess exactly how this show is going to translate things from the manga to the anime, but that’s not going to stop me, lol.

Anyway this episode adapted chapters 53, 54, and 55, and it ended up working way better than I expected. I think this is either the first or second time the show’s adapted more than two chapters in a single episode, so I was worried about if it’d feel rsuhed, but it really didn’t, since they cut out a lot of the more minor scenes, and rearranged the timeline of events to tie it all together more. 

Basically, to start with, they got rid of the aspect of chapter 53 where Rin breaks Tohru’s window to distract everyone while she talks to Shigure, and everyone has to deal with fixing the window, and they replaced it with Rin just showing up to talk to Shigure right after Tohru and co leave for the beach, which I think was a really good change. I feel like everything to do with the window getting smashed would have felt really jarring with how the whole scene was paced, and it makes more sense that Rin would just wait until Shigure’s alone to talk to him, instead of doing something really dumb and reckless to try and make a distraction.

And on the note of that scene with her and Shigure, I think manga readers should remember that this is exactly how the scene plays out in the manga, and we don’t get a proper flashback to how their conversation went until a bit later in the story. So they didn’t cut anything out there.

They also rearranged the flow of events with the start of the beach arc itself to make it go by quicker, mainly by having Kisa and Hiro be there with everyone immediately, which helps condense a lot of scenes together. They also cut a whole scene related to everyone picking out their rooms once Kisa and Hiro showed up, and I think it was probably worth removing in order to make the episode go by faster.

As a consequence of bringing Kisa and Hiro into things earlier, the drama with Hiro being rude to Tohru and stirring up her deeply repressed trauma happens a bit earlier than it did in the manga.

They also spread out some of the content with Yuki across the episode to build up toward the episode’s climax being the scene with him and Tohru. Which included them holding back on the reveal of him being the boy Tohru got the hat from until the end of the episode, which I think was a good choice.

It’s kinda funny seeing so many anime-only people talking about how they don’t really get how this whole plot point could be that important in the long run, even after what this episode told us about it. I can’t really blame anyone for thinking that, since the anime hasn’t really gotten into it at all yet, but it’s definitely way more important than people would think, and for different reasons than they might expect. I think a lot of people will be surprised that it doesn’t actually have a whole lot to do with Tohru’s relationships with Yuki and Kyo, and is instead more about Yuki and Kyo’s backstories and their conflict with each other.

I can see why people might still think this episode is fast-paced, and it kinda was, but they cut out enough material that it didn’t end up feeling like they were fitting three whole chapters of content into one episode.

Anyway, this is where the beach arc officially kicks off, and it’s becoming pretty clear to everyone why this arc is a big deal, lol. There’s all sorts of relationship development going on, and everyone’s getting forced to acknowledge all the emotional baggage they’ve been repressing. And now Akito’s gonna come around just to stir shit up.

In particular it feels really exciting to see the anime finally get to the point where the story officially begins to really dig into Tohru’s backstory and her own emotional baggage. It’s been hinted at before, especially in this second season, but this is where the story spells out in bright neon letters that she has her own trauma she’s dealing with, and other characters are starting to notice.

In a lot of ways I really relate to the specific kind of trauma and baggage that Tohru’s dealing with in regards to both of her parents, and I really like the extremely slow-burn way the story builds it up. The scene with her sitting alone on the balcony and quietly reassuring herself that she’s fine and that she’ll always be with her mother is just really emotional, especially when you know her backstory.

But I won’t bother getting into that until the story decides to delve into it more later on.

We of course also got all sorts of stuff with Yuki in this episode that reinforces and continues to build up his own trauma that he’s still dealing with, and that’s definitely gonna come to a head sooner rather than later, lol. Everything with Tohru is sorta left on the backburner until much later in the story, but this arc really digs into Yuki and Kyo’s issues. Kyo hasn’t gotten a whole lot of focus yet in this arc, aside from him being super cute and us getting even more examples of how he’s slowly becoming more understanding and perceptive toward Tohru, but his time to shine will definitely come before this arc ends.

Also, one thing I wanna mention is that the bit where Momiji lists off all the people he invited to the beach trip seems to be anime original, which is interesting. For one thing it was there so they could include the scene with Kisa and Hiro getting their invitations earlier than the manga did, but more than that it sticks out to me that he included Ritsu in the list of people he invited. Which is interesting because in the manga Ritsu isn’t even mentioned in this arc at all. So I’m wondering if they might be planning to include him in this arc in the anime, though the fact that he wasn’t in this episode outside of that one line makes me unsure.

It’d be really nice if they included him, though. It’d at least help mitigate the fact that he gets like literally zero screen-time in the manga between his intro arc and the final volume or two. I’m pretty sure that Takaya’s said before that it wasn’t exactly an intentional choice on her part, and was more a mix of her just forgetting he existed, and her not really knowing how to fit him into the story. So it’d be nice if the anime could come up with it’s own ways to give him more screen-time instead of him just vanishing off the face of the earth, but we’ll see. I think Takaya would be on board with it, at least, since she seems to regret how little screen-time he got in the manga.

Anyway, the next episode title seems to imply that [for now] we’re skipping the chapters focused on Hatori and Mayu, and jumping straight to chapters 58 and 59. Which I’m happy with, since I’ve honestly been hoping they’d push that arc to later on, so it wouldn’t be a jarring diversion from the beach arc. After how much this episode set up, I think anime only people would have really disliked it if the next episode took a hard left turn into focusing 100% on Hatori and Mayu. I feel like the beach arc is where the manga really finds it’s groove in terms of pacing and things feel less erratic and episodic, but that whole arc always felt like it was awkwardly placed in the story. And honestly since it has barely anything to do with the beach arc aside from taking place in summer, I think it’d be really easy to just change the timing for it and have it happen later on. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if they push it all the way to season 3, lol. But we’ll see. At the very least if they’re not gonna adapt it in the next episode, I think it’s at least getting pushed back to after the beach arc’s done.

[foresthearth]

Review: “Witch”, by Lisa Lister

Coming in three years after publication, ‘cause that’s how I roll.

Okay, I have to mention, I HATE these matte covers that pick up fingerprints like you wouldn’t believe. Ugh. Why do this to me and my greasy little hands?!

Moving on.

TL;DR: If you are a cisgender, AFAB woman with a fully functioning reproductive system, who finds this fact to be intrinsic to your parsing of femininity and spirituality, this book will probs be great for you.

Everyone else? This book is bad. Yes, there is some nuance to this and the WHY of its badness (and all reviews are subject to reviewer bias), but overall, in summation? It’s bad.

To start off, the kinda dubious but overall not so bad: it doesn’t really tell you anything. It bills itself as sort of a cultural studies text crossed with an intro to witchcraft; however, for me, it fails at both. As a textbook, it does not cite sources, though there is a “Bookshelf” section at the end – the text itself, however, really just serves as a place for Lister to talk about her perceptions of the female and feminine power throughout history. Which in and of itself is FINE, but don’t say you’re going to explain “the history behind witchcraft” (literally in the back cover blurb) and not actually back that history up with sources. You can talk all you want about persecution of women, but when putting it in a specific context such as the age of witch trials, or referring to societies that used to venerate women before the patriarchy took hold, it really helps to have some primary or secondary source to back up what you’re saying. You may think that we’re all drawing from a common knowledge, but not everyone has access to that knowledge pool, nor has the same background and learning. Just back up what you’re saying, or even just reference further reading that people can do if they want to learn more about what you’re pulling from. (I compare this to one of my books on Queer Magic – it also doesn’t have a bibliography, but that is due to the fact that it IS primary source material, essays from queer folks on *their magic*. Witch is not trying to be a primary source, therefore Lister should really acknowledge where she’s found her information.)

Now, the intro to witchcraft bit. Personally, none of the spells resonated with me – except for the Ostara honeycakes recipe because they are delicious – but that has more to do with how I practise magic. Lister’s practise and mine are very different, and her formalised spells/rituals do absolutely nothing for me. BUT if you are new to witchcraft, and looking for step-by-step guidance for certain issues, or rituals for a sabbat, these could be helpful, or at least give a jumping off point. However, it’s useful to keep in mind that this is not following any specific path within witchcraft – so if you are starting out and want to learn something formalised, this isn’t the book for it. Which is why I say it fails as being an intro to witchcraft: it’s showing you a few spells with no background into the wherefore, no reasoning as to what gives these things the power for this spell. And I feel like that’s because Lister isn’t trying for a tradition-based book, in that she herself works intuitively. So the spellcraft doesn’t really work for me, and I feel like it doesn’t give a firm enough foundation to be considered an introductory book. That being said, it does give just enough information to pique curiosity, so that you may have an idea of where to start further research.

 There is one aspect of Witch that I do find pretty good, which is the constant reiteration of finding your own power and believing yourself and trusting your intuition. This is what I think is the strong point of the book overall – Lister says it’s to help women “reclaim the word ‘witch’”, but witchcraft aside, I definitely feel it’s got some good points about not letting yourself be silenced, and moving into trusting yourself and your ways of knowing.

 BUT.

There is a MAJOR issue that I have with this book, and that is the transphobia and gender essentialism. And this is what, for me, makes it a bad book.

Let me quote a bit for you, from right near the beginning:

“Yet, as I was pulling my pages and pages of handwritten notes… I felt an overwhelming need to apologize for writing a book specifically about women as witches… I’ll piss off the transgender community for not addressing them… That thought? That need to apologize? That’s the very reason why I HAVE to write this book. What I share is NOT intended to exclude others. But trying to be all-inclusive would totally miss the point.” (Witch, pp. xvii-xviii)

Sigh. If you’re going into something with the feeling that you’re being exclusive and need to apologize, maybe that’s a sign to take a step back and look at who you’re excluding and why. If, to you, “the essence of a witch is someone who trusts their inner authority and uses their own personal magic to navigate and negotiate the environment they currently find themselves in” (ibid. p. xix), then why the need to specifically mention that witches power comes from their womb? Why keep bringing it back to “pussy power” and tying everything back to menstrual cycles? Why? And maybe – MAYBE – if there had only been this passing reference in the intro, it could be overlooked. But the references to pussy power, to wombs, tying power to biology, is constant throughout the book:

“Blessed be my womb for being the holy grail, cauldron and keeper of the mysteries.” (p. xxii)

“One sister is chanting the various names given to the Mother God: ‘Isis, Astarte, Diana, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Innana’ over and over, from deep down in her womb. (p. xxiii)

“There were no fanfares, marching bands or big applause: just pussy-deep truth.” (p. 3)

“You can only find your power when you plug yourself back into the motherboard. When your feet touch Mumma Earth, and your womb and heart connect with her.” (p. 16)

“Generations of women have been disconnected from the power that lies between their thighs – their lady landscape, their womb and their menstrual cycle. They’ve lost connection with their ability to create life (and everything else) in their wombs, which means their minds can be easily manipulated and indoctrinated by Patriarchy.” (p. 75)

I could go on, but believe me when I say this is pervasive throughout the entire book.

You can’t have it both ways. You cannot give an inclusive definition of what you think a witch is, and then go on to say ‘oh, but you’re only a witch if you have this biological aspect’ and venerate that biological aspect in an exclusionary way. This book is either only for AFAB, cis women with fully working parts, or it’s for everyone.

I am a queer, cisgender woman with pretty severe endocrine issues which have basically fucked my reproductive system. The amount of time that Lister spends in this book, talking about how our feminine power comes from this same reproductive system is absolutely distasteful, as well as being reductive and exclusionary. I’ve spent enough of my life feeling useless and not enough, due to my physical issues, that I really don’t need a book about reclaiming my feminine power to ALSO say that my feminine power is rooted in a fundamentally broken part of my body. Yes, the menstrual cycle/organs are powerful and have strong magic, but they are NOT what makes someone a woman. To say that it is not only excludes those who either don’t have or have ill-functioning systems, as well as reducing women to nothing more than their reproductive systems… And isn’t that what Lister’s trying to get away from, what with reclaiming feminine power and blasting the patriarchy?

And if I feel this way? I cannot even imagine what my trans family would feel like, expecting a book on witchcraft and the feminine, only to be told mid-text, that they’re not valid or wanted.

I’m not saying that you can’t write a book about the power inherent in the reproductive systems. But just be sure to make it very clear that that’s what you’re doing. Don’t play coy and hide your TERF views in the text, put them on the cover so we don’t pay money for exclusionary bullshit.

And for further reading:

https://www.oxfordreference.com/view/10.1093/oi/authority.20110803095846595

https://medium.com/@pennyred/terf-wars-why-transphobia-has-no-place-in-feminism-60d3156ad06e

https://www.patheos.com/blogs/pantheon/2011/03/transgender-issues-in-pagan-religions/

https://godsandradicals.org/2016/02/10/its-all-about-sex-feminism-paganism-and-trans-exclusion/

https://www.hercampus.com/school/york-u/women-wicca-transphobia-and-other-issues

[what-even-is-thiss]

What do you do as an english major? I might major in english so I want to know what's kinda gonna happen, I think I have a good view but I'm still learning new things from friends who majored in english (if you dont have time I understand)

That depends on whether you wanna be a standard English major or an English Education major. English Education majors are going on to be middle school or high school teachers. That’s it. They probably go on to a one or two year teaching credential program and a student teacher assistantship after they get their bachelor’s.

Plain old English majors are there for a variety of reasons. To have a college degree and make it easier to get a job later, to become college level professors, to go into publishing, because they wanna become writers and their school doesn’t have a creative writing major, to become archivists at libraries and museums, because they wanna be librarians, or because they want to go to law school afterwards. More pre-law students are English majors or minors than Political Science these days.

Regular English majors (that’s what I am) have to take literature courses. A lot of people seem to assume we take classes in grammar. That’s not the case. This is an English Literature degree. Not an English Language degree. Every school has different requirements but basically there will be categories and you need to take a certain number of classes in that category to graduate. Except for a few main core classes you can pick and choose which classes you want to take.

My school requires an intro to American literature class, an intro to British literature class (Brit Lit), a Shakespeare course, and a literary analysis training course (introduction to literary criticism).

In intro to lit crit students learn about the major schools of literary criticism (psychological, marxist, queer, etc.) and usually find themselves a focus, although you should be expected to know how to use any form of criticism if it is asked of you. This class is generally more activity heavy then any other class and involves a lot of hands on stuff. Or about as hands on as English can get. (its not that exciting in my opinion) You go through poetry analysis, book analysis, play analysis, history of lit crit, and short story analysis and are taught how to write a professional level academic paper that could potentially be published in a journal. (some undergrads even get published. It’s true!)

Most of the other classes will be about the same. You will be assigned readings relevant to the class and be expected to have notes on them when you come in. Classes usually consist of a combination of group discussion and lecture. Lectures are normally part common analysis of the text and part history lesson. Lectures are where you usually get most of your literary history info, so pay attention and take a lot of notes. Grading usually involves a series of tests and essays. The professor will assign an essay or two (or four if they’re pure evil) and you will follow their instructions. Tests are usually about the history lectures and the contents of the readings. Sometimes you will be expected to write a short timed essay during a final exam but not usually. Often times there will be class discussions or small group discussions and the teacher will ask you to come up with some kind of analysis together. Lectures can be very interactive as well. Professors will often ask for questions and opinions from the class and students regularly ask questions and are encouraged to do so. English classes are usually pretty small too (30 students or less. Sometimes as little as 12 students) so the professor generally knows everyone and will know when someone isn’t engaging with the material. Class participation is usually a part of the final grade.

Normal categories of classes you have to take are world lit, American lit, Brit lit, ancient lit, and lit of diversity. These can have a lot of different classes in them. Mythology, British Medieval, Chaucer, Ancient World lit, Chicano, African American, Women Authors, Asian American, pop fiction, the list goes on.

English Education majors have to do all of this too, but they have to take less classes in the different literature categories. While I have to take two Brit lit classes, an English Ed major only has to take one. In addition to these they have to branch out, taking public speaking classes, drama classes, linguistics classes, etc. To make them a more well rounded teacher, you know.

English Ed majors at my university also have to put together a portfolio of work that they’ve done. I don’t have to do that, but I do have to take a senior seminar class, which is a small intensive class with a really narrow focus and a lot of paper writing. I’m probably gonna have to do that next semester. Ugh.

Oh, and both have a foreign language requirement. You have to do it for two semesters in a row usually.

In addition to all this you have to take general education courses. Those are all really different though so I can’t tell you about them.

[vegetacide]

Cloak and Dagger

Veg●notable: Okay, I had a little fun with this and took a few liberties with one of the boys… It worked for I wanted but I am not sure how it will be received... ::ducks behind a Tracy so she doesn’t get hit with anything...::

Also I am kinda being a pantser with this chapter.. I have a general idea of where I want it to go but I didn’t suss it out like I have in other chapters so please excuse if the pacing if off. I kinda let the Boys tell me where they wanted to go and what sort of interactions they wanted to have….and they may have gone a bit off course..

As per the norm.. All errors and such are my own.

Read, review, like, reblog.. Whatever the platform, it is very, very much appreciated and it all acts as my motivational fuel.

Previous Chapters

Intro  | One  |  Two 

Chapter 3: Games 

Enjoy!

o0o

Scott drummed his fingers along the careworn surface of his father’s desk, his gaze lost to the middle distance as he thought over the information that had just been brought to him. Not that there was much, which was the problem in and of itself.

Kayo and Lady Penelope had had very little to tell him. After Fuse’s botched attempt at the old, disused power plant to obtain nuclear material he’d just up and disappeared. Their security expert and London agent had been traipsing around the globe trying to track down leads for weeks now but there was no sign of the Chaos member, his sister or for that matter the Hood… anywhere..at all.

For the Hood on his own, it wasn’t that unusual. The criminal would go quiet for a spell and not resurface for months. Now that he was with the Crew, that was an entirely different story.

Normal some tidbit of information would crop up of a sighting in some far corner of the world, or a rumour of some heist or another would drift about on the dark web. Either Lady P would poke at it to figure out if it was worth further effort or Kayo would get a call from the GDF to check with some contacts but everything had gone silent. There was nothing, no where.

Scott looked up at the muted holo-cast. A variation of the same headline scrolled along under the chrome anchors’ desk and something in the pit of his stomach tightened. This eerie feeling of foreboding had been dogging him since the plant and he just knew this wasn’t going to end well.

Picking up an old school stylus that for some reason his father had kept even with the advent of modern computer interfaces, Scott examined its length. His father had owned it for as long as he could remember. He’d once asked Jeff why he insisted on keeping it and his father had smiled in that way he did and had said that ‘somethings were just worth keeping.’ He hadn’t elaborated in any other way or given any other hint to his reasoning after that. It left Scott scratching his head in confusion.

Even now all these years later he still didn’t understand though as he looked at the smooth finish and felt the weight of it between his fingers, he could understand its appeal. It provided something tangible to hold on to, tactile.

In his case not only physically but it also provided him with a psychologically connection to the man they all missed so much. A man he truly wished was with them right now.

Maybe the great Jeff Tracy would be able to wrap his head around all this, come out with a master plan so at the end of the day the world was a better, safer place. Scott certainly didn’t think he had the chops to do it himself. Self doubt was a bitch especially when there was no supporting hand to guide you.

His father was going to come home, Scott knew that for sure. WIth Brains basically locked away working on the zero-x engine it was only a matter of time. Scott just hoped that when they got their father back…. Why was he even thinking about this? Setting the stylus back down, he rubbed at the back of his head in hopes of dispelling the direction of his thoughts. This was not helping.

Snagging his forgotten cup of coffee, he took a swig and grimaced. Cold and it was the good stuff from Virgil’s hidden stash behind the lima bean in the pantry. Eyeballing the drink with its thin layer of cream film on top, he sighed and tossed the rest back. It was too much effort to haul his ass downstairs for a fresh cup, besides his brother would kick his butt if he were to find out he knew of the existence of the rich, smoky ground beans and had wasted it. Better to just suck it up and deal with the cold brew then risk the engineer’s wrath.

“Thunderbird 5 to base.”

“Hey John,” Scott greeted with the raise of his now empty coffee mug. “What’s up?”

“Just letting you know Grandma is on approach. Will be there in t-minus 5”

“Thanks for the heads up.”

John nodded in return and they sat in silence for a moment. By the controlled look on John’s face Scott could tell that the monitor was working up to say something more. Leaning back in his chair, he cocked a foot over one knee and steepled his fingers as his brother processed whatever it was that was on his mind.

Scott didn’t want to push but time was ticking. “Johnny….?” He knew the use of his brother’s childhood nickname would get the ball rolling.

John’s eyes narrowed in annoyance at the moniker but the redhead let it slide. “How’s it going down there?”

Scott dropped his hands, pushed up to his feet and walked the short distance to the sunken seating area. “As well as can be expected.” Taking the steps down he parked on his usually couch with a heavy sigh. Sinking into the cushions with a slouch and tossing an arm up and over the back.

“That sounds...” John paused as he searched for the appropriate word, “to steal a phrase from Alan.. craptastic.”

One shoulder went up in a shrug and Scott dragged in a deep breathe. “Ya, well. Shitty situation but you know how these things go. Time and space and all that.”

“Time and space?” A smirk settled on John’s face. “This coming from you. Eos mark down the time and date. Scott is being reasonable”

“Time and date noted, John.” Came the young voice of the A.I. “I have also taken the liberty of recording this interaction for posterity in the likelihood that you want to revisit the momentous occasion.”

John chuckled as the light ring came into the view field of the camera. The array of little lights flashing in what Scott could only conclude as amusement at his cost. The A.I was learning and learning fast and Scott didn’t know how to feel about that.

“Hardy har.” A dry sound, accompanied by an eye roll. “Am I really that bad?”

The stare and awestruck look he received by way of answer should have been enough.”Aw, come on…”

“If smother hen was in the dictionary, Scott. You would be the picture beside it.” It was said rather frankly and that irked Scott into yet another eyeroll. “Matter of fact, it might actually already be in Urban Dictionary..”

“Okay. Okay..I get it. Enough already.” Scott’s boredom and disdain at the direction of the conversation wasn’t hard to miss. “I can’t help it. I worry about all of you.”

John took pity on his elder brother, the smile leaving his face. “I know you do, Scott. Especially when it’s Virgil.”

Scott sagged further into the couch.

“We all need to fall apart every now and again. The same applies to Virgil.” John spoke, his voice carrying across the distance. “As much as we rely on him to be the family rock, even a rock wears down over time when enough stress is applied.”

“Ya, I know. You’re right.” Scott leaned forward, his elbows coming to rest on his knees as he looked at the floor. “I just wish…” He didn’t finish his train of thought.

“Scott, he’ll be fine. Just give him the room to breath and in a day or two he will be right as rain again. He needs to stew this over a bit.” John shifted his gaze away from the cam, his projected hand skimming over something off screen.

“Well from what Brain’s has told me, Virgil has him doing system checks on all the wash-bays. Maybe an answer will be there for him.”

“You talked to Brain?”

“Yes, just before calling you. He wanted me to look at some computations. Double check his math and he didn’t want to bother Virgil with it” Floating about the space station some 22,000 kilomitres above them, John glaced backup a moment. “Why? Haven’t you talked to him?”

Scott sat up a bit straighter, sheepishly ashamed that the yelling the night before had sent the mousy genus into hiding in the bowels of the island. “Not since we got back..”

“Oh,” John failed to hide the nonplussed expression that flashed across the screen. “Glad I was off world last night than..:”

“Jay, you’re always off world”

John couldn’t say anything to counter that and Scott knew it. The star obsessed Tracy rarely made landfall and Scott tried to think back on how long it had been since the astronaut had been forced to submit to some down time.

“Scott, you’re getting that look in your eyes again.”

“What look?”

“The ‘I need to smother’ look that comes with the forehead wrinkles of the elderly.. Don’t you dare set your sights on me. I am needed up here with full access to all of 5’s systems and you know it.”

Scott put his hands up in surrender, not wanting to have another sibling forcibly shutting him out. “Message received and watched the old person jokes. They are laugh lines not stress.. The hair though, that’s all from you guys.”

John looked off camera again and his expression changed from brotherly bemusement to curious. “Aunt Val is reaching out. I’ll patch her though.”

Scott cursed under his breath and ignored the admonishing glare from space. Seemed he hadn’t sworn as quietly as he thought, good thing Gran….

“Scott Bartholomew Carpenter Tracy!”

Scott flinched at the sudden loud bark of reproach directed his way as his Grandmother marched into the room, fire and brimstone in her wake. “You were not raised in a barn, young man.” Crap, his diminutive elder was not impressed, especially if she broke out the little known and seldom used ‘Bartholomew.’

He was the only brother out of the five to be graced with the additionally middle name, gifted to him as the first born from his great, great Grandfather. A Tribute to a war vet that his father had been blessed with as well and one that made Scott shudder every time he heard it.

“Well technically… “John piped up earning him a warning glare from Scott.

“Gee John, thanks for the warning.. “ Scott grumbled with little enthusiasm and dripping with sarcastic annoyance.

“I did,” John blinked.

Scott contemplated several ways to seek revenge over the tirade of the fierce and feisty Sally Tracy and most of them involved airlocks and a module full of moldy bagels.

John did his level best to hide his smile at the misfortune of the eldest. “I told you she was on approach and you know she has the ears of a bat, Scooter.”

Scott glared at the space nut but all he got in return was a very large grin before the monitor disappeared and the 3D rendition of his Godmother materialized.

“Colonel Casey” Scott acknowledges, his Grandmother patted his knee in greeting and settled down on the couch beside him, the vexed look still sparking in her cerulean gaze.

“Valerie,” His Grandma piped up. “You’re a sight for sore eyes”

“Scott. Sally.” A crisp, formal acknowledgement. Definitely a business call.

The tone made Scott straighten his spine, posture ramrodding as his years of military training kicked in. Pushing to his feet, the Commander of International Rescue took up the forefront of his mind. The dilemma of the current Tracy drama brushed aside as the call to arms; so to speak, was issued by his honorary Aunt’s projected persona.

“What can I do for you, Colonel Casey?”

“Orders come down the pipe, Scott. General Abner informed me this afternoon that World Council has declared Kazakhstan a no fly zone. All personnel, both combative and civilian are on evac orders effective immediately. As of 23:00, anything in or outbound found crossing restrictive airspace will be termed hostile and dealt with accordingly.”

“And as our liaison..?” Scott asked, bracing for the answer that he feared.

“I’ve been advised to inform you that the restriction extends to International Rescue as well. Under no circumstance is International; Rescue to enter that airspace. Any action will be seen as an act of aggression against the WC and those perpetrating said act are to be shot down.”

“Noted.”

“Scott, you need to abide by this ruling. This is from way up the food chain. There will be nothing I can do to help you if these orders are disregarded. “ Casey stressed. “You will be on your own.I’ve also been instructed that anyone aiding and abetting is to be brought in and prosecuted under the full force of the law.”

Meaning, the whole family would be under threat and the whole might of the GDF would be pointed in their direction. Even though they claimed no allegiance to any known entity, International Rescue and by turn the Tracy’s would be marked as traitors “I understand Colonel.”

Essentially the country has been walled off and Scott wasn’t sure how he felt about that. He just hoped that there would be no call out for iR in the vicinity of the damned country but he knew from experience hopes and wishes were very seldom taken into consideration.

-o-o-

Some 6,500km away, tucked under a remote mountain village on the furthest edge of Kazakhstan a display monitor beeped to life with the flow of garish, green text. Servos hummed, fans ticked on and a smile crept across the harshly angled face with amber eyes.

Piece by piece plans that had taken months to arrange were finally starting to come together. Money had passed hands, people had been bought, information exchanged and like pawns on a chessboard, the players were shifting into their places.

Looking at the board, the queen slipped into place and unbeknownst to all but one, the king now sat vulnerable. The end was in sight.

Let the games begin.

TBC