#Anyway I got Bibble
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iwasforceedagainstmywill · 1 year ago
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symerr · 9 months ago
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this is definitely not caleb vatore he is my original character do not steal ty
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angelicscribe · 11 months ago
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ok i headcannon that gojo loves the barbie movies
and i don't mean the 2023 live action i mean those old 2000s cgi messes that have no sensible plot
he loves them for the bit okay he is a silly, goofy individual and he commits to that
but his favorite part is watching them with you.
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"oh my god, look at that fucking thing!"
"thing?" you seethe at him. "that is not a thing. that's bibble and he is awesome, i'll have you know." you and satoru were watching barbie fairytopia: rainbow magic after talking about how it used to be your favorite way back when.
"what even is he?" satoru snickers.
"he's..." you falter. "blue?"
"i can see that silly, i mean what kind of animal is that? what species is he?"
"a blue one!" you state confidently. satoru bursts out giggling at your stubbornness. you give him a gentle shove with your sock-covered foot.
"hey, why are you all the way over there?" he whines, giving you his infamous pout. "come snuggle with meeeeeee." he grabs your foot and yanks your whole body towards him.
"jesus toru," you mumble, mostly to yourself. "so needy." you shake your head but look over at him when you hear him giggle, this one much softer than usual.
"you know you love it," he says, slinging his arm around your shoulders to pull your body to rest against him.
"yeah," you remark softly, "i do."
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eeeeek my first fic! or my first one since the year 2013 lol. this was super rushed i wrote this in less than 10 minutes. i got struck with inspiration and i figured at least it's something ya know? anyways i hope u enjoyed! i may or may not have a sugardaddy!satoru piece in the works.... ehehehe
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songbird-oracle · 4 months ago
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I just got a wheelchair. My very own wheelchair, not just a transport chair, and honestly I couldn’t be happier! I can finally move myself around and make my life a bit easier!!
So to certain family who keep saying “the goal is to not use it.” “You don’t want to be stuck in that thing, girl.” “You’re too excited, you don’t want to use that too much” “Your grandmother should use that, not you”
Yes. Yes I do want to be in it, yes I am excited, yes it is for me. Wanna know why? Cause it’s a mobility aid, ya doofuses. It’s supposed to help, and I may not be old but I’m disabled. So yeah, I’m excited to use it, because it gives me back a bit of freedom. It gives me more autonomy over where I go, and it’ll help me be more mindful of my body and its limits now that I actually have something to help.
It’s called a mobility aid for a reason. So if I need to use it, I’m not going to feel bad.
I’m disabled and that’s not a bad thing. It’s nit something to be ashamed of. It’s a part of who I am, and that’s okay.
Anyways, I named my wheelchair Bibble and I’m going to put a bibble sticker on it.
Hail Hephaestus!! If my family ain’t got me, I know he got me 😌💕
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miminmimikyu · 5 months ago
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Prodigy episodes 13-14: I was not prepared
I’m so excited!!!! Rok-Tahk-centric episode!!!!!!! I feel like she's been a little pushed to the side the last few episodes? But I love our science genius, so excited that her groundbreaking work from ep1 is key here! Though Dal saying that Rok prevented a core breach in 10 minutes is a little disingenuous innit, poor girl was in there for... years?
Is this going to turn out to be the origin of the attack Tribbles seen in Picard S3?
For someone who just obtained a very perishable miracle body, Zero really hasn't got their sense of self-preservation down yet.. That really was a sickening crushing noise when the Tribble ran over Zero.
Of all the Klingon designs we’ve seen in Star Trek, I really like Prodigy’s the best. The Bibble really freaks me out though
Rok truly has made it as a scientist now that she has uttered the words “what have I done??” while lit dramatically. S2 is truly a Rok-Tahk unethical science speedrun: she already has created identical(ish) holographic copies of herself and her friends that are seemingly self-aware and may feel existential dread, she proposed to infect an entire population of creatures with an experimental genome editing retrovirus, and unwittingly created a new form of life from a discarded cell culture dish. Also her argument for encouraging Zero to take up some strangers' offer to put them in a physical body was her own scientific curiosity. Girl! But I guess that one's ok because Zero wanted to do it anyway.
Maj'el looking out for the others and opening up is one of my new favourite things
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Chakotay saying: “let’s set a course for home” referring to Voyager-A is justtttttrttttt asggsshshshjajakka
Chakotay reaaaally was holding onto that smelly t-shirt full of holes until he was within range of Janeway. Him being nervous to see Vice Admiral Janeway is unexpectedly so cute! But Dal, really...? "Looks like someone's ready to be sent to the Admiral's ready room?" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
It isnt a true voyager-adjacent series if Janeway doesn’t die at least one time, even if it's offscreen.
Hang on, hold on a second, let’s play a little longer in the universe where Captain Tuvix is leading a ship full of Enderprizians!!!
Shattered Voyager-A is so pretty! Though I don’t really understand in what way the ship is shattered? Going in a turbolift or transporter takes you across a boundary but they were able to walk from sickbay to the transporter room just fine? Or was that a different transporter room on the same deck? Ah well.
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Scdhdbdhsjsjsjka Mirror Universe Janeway is too much <3 is that decoration on her eyebrow a nod to Seven’s ocular implant, or a trophy? I now understand why Voyager never had a proper mirror episode. Living Witness Evil Janeway leaves a powerful impression but she has nothing on Mirror Janeway's theatrics. She would have been too powerful for a live-action late '90s sci-fi show
fssksksksks I love that they’ve gone the Evil Abed route with the facial hair. And then, after spending all that time perfecting his appearance, Chakotay ends up reuniting with Janeway in a skintight catsuit and sporting a fake grease goatee+moustache on his face……….
Dammit it’s impossible to determine what’s going on between Janeway and Chakotay because they were doing shit like this for 7 years when they were on Voyager too!!
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There isn’t a reality where Chakotay can hurt Janeway and there isn’t a reality where Janeway doesn’t get into Chakotay’s personal space like they’re still in a 4:3 aspect ratio <3<3<3
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draxeanlxia · 1 year ago
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Having ADHD is both a blessing and a curse, currently right now it’s a bit of a blessing.
I remembered this art that showed a fake fairy or maybe a mimic fairy? They were called something but I can’t remember. Maybe bibbles?
You know how fairies are little ladies with wings until you’re far away and then they’re balls of light with wings? These fake fairies looked like balls with wings and sharp teeth. The art also showed Legend being chased and bitten by them. If anyone knows what I am talking about, please tell me so I can credit this person.
Anyways, I was thinking about this art, and it got me thinking. I’m pretty sure a lot of us headcanon that Warriors is such a dad to both Mask, Tune, maybe Skull Kid and Tetra, and most definitely to his fairies.
I also headcanon that Warriors is mostly okay with Legend calling him ‘pretty boy’. As long as the boy is joking, the moment he has a serious or hurtful tone then everything changes. Everyone else that knows Warriors on the other hand does not like that nickname.
Warriors’ Epona has kicked him multiple times for saying that nickname within her hearing range. Wind and Time have pranked him so many times that he’s gotten slightly paranoid. Or rather, he’s gotten more paranoid than usual. Ravio tried to lectured him on calling Warriors that name but a portal took him before he could start. Fi has been playing noises that for some reason, only Legend can hear. She doesn’t do it often, just enough that he think he’s going slightly mad.
And to top it all off there are times were, even though they are not in Wild’s or Wind’s time, a heavy durian or a large coconut would land directly on his head.
Now what would happen if he called Warriors ‘pretty boy’ in front of his fairies? 
“Release the bibbles!” A chorus of fairies screamed.
“OUCH! SON OF A BITCH! STOP BITING YOU PIECES OF SHIT!”
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ordinaryschmuck · 8 months ago
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What I Thought About The First Doctor's Run
Salutations, random people on the internet who certainly won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and sometimes draw comics and cartoons.
So, I’ve made a discovery…Almost every episode of Classic Doctor Who is available FOR FREE on Tubi! You know what this means?!
“More people can watch the early beginnings of the most iconic sci-fi series of all time?”
That AND I can finally review Doctor Who as a whole!
I won’t lie, this has been something I’ve wanted to do for a WHILE. Either as a ranking of each Doctor or a ranking of their best episodes, I’ve been wanting to go in depth with this series for SO LONG. And since the odds are I WON’T become a writer for television like I’ve always dreamed, I might as well talk about my favorite TV shows! Starting with the son of a bitch who started it all: The First Doctor.
Here’s what I know about the First Doctor: Next to nothing. My experience with The Doctor as a whole started all the way with Number Nine, with the only taste of One being through that Christmas Special a few years back. He’s definitely more cynical and rude than present Doctors, but this is way back in his early beginnings. NO ONE knew what direction this character would take years later and just focussed on making an interesting character NOW. Er, then? Now? Then?
Eh, bibbly-bobbly.
The point is that I’m going to TRY and not be biased with One, look at him as if I were right there in 1963. Unfortunately, unlike everyone ELSE in the sixties, I don’t have access to all the episodes. During 1968-1978, most tapes that held Doctor Who episodes were reused for new film or deleted completely for space, leaving NINETY-SEVEN episodes erased from time forever and causing twenty-six serials either gone completely or incomplete. It’s basically what streaming services and studios are doing nowadays, but without pirating sites as a safety net to preserve the art from being COMPLETELY lost. Now, there are some audio tracks saved for commercial release that feature still images or commissioned animation, but that’s not the case for every episode, unfortunately. So things are going to get a little…weird for this review. For now, I’ll say that I’m going to stick to what’s on Tubi and improvise with what’s NOT on there. Also, I’m not going to go through every single episode. Just share my thoughts on each serial as a WHOLE, mainly because those practically add up to modern episodes anyway, just an hour or two longer.
Now, with that said, let’s take a step back in time as we discuss the first adventures with our first Doctor.
Decades Old Spoilers Below
THE SERIALS
We’ll begin by going in order of each serial, starting with his first adventure and ending with his last. Helps go through this journey together.
The Unearthly Child: Okay, full disclosure, this one’s NOT on Tubi, so I had to look it up through…other means. But to be fair, it’s not like I could just IGNORE The Doctor’s very first adventure. It’s here we see a sort of formula that still remains constant to this day. The Doctor meets new companions, they become shocked by how the TARDIS is bigger on the inside, they go to a place that’s filled with a temporary cast of disposable characters, and are forced to solve a problem for them or die trying. Of course, some things are different, and not just the inside of the TARDIS. The fact that The Doctor had a granddaughter was mind blowing and left me wondering what happened to her since she never showed up ONCE in the revival. And The Doctor was…surprisingly inactive despite being the titular character. He caused more problems than fixed them, like being the reason everyone was trapped in the Stone Age and later becoming the person who needed to be rescued. Honestly, Ian proved himself more as the leading man than The Doctor did throughout the whole ordeal, calling the shots and even being the one who came up with the plan that got them OUT of danger. Even when taking account that this was just the show starting out, it seems weird that the titular character isn’t the one who leads the group and is instead the whiney bitch that the others just tell themselves to ignore. As for the adventure, it’s pretty dull. Granted, you need to introduce audiences to the concept of time travel by showing them something easy to grasp like going back to the stone age. You gotta save weirder stuff for the future episodes. But the characters getting chased around by cavemen isn’t really that engaging, and it REALLY drags down a lot by part four where the conflict feels stretched out to meet the full twenty-three minutes. Overall, not that great of a first introduction but most of the best series of television rarely start off perfect. The question is if it makes me want to see more, and…it honestly doesn’t. If not for the knowledge of what the series would eventually become, I’m not sure WHY someone would stick around. But the Doctor Who fan in me is strong so I say we keep charging on.
The Daleks: The first encounter with The Daleks, the Doctor’s WORST enemies, and the serial is much better because of it. It’s actually interesting to see how these villains began with how simple they are to fight, the fact that they don’t INSTANTLY kill others they attack, and how they actually keep PRISONERS. And the serial does a great job at showing how they’re definite menaces to be feared, but not impossible to defeat, creating decent tension as the characters try to fight back literal killing machines. I also love how every character throughout the serial does something important, especially The Doctor who manages to do much more this time than whine and complain as he actually uses his intelligence to help his companions out of this troublesome situation. Although, he’s still the jackass that got them all trapped in this situation all for the sake of exploring a town that they know NOTHING about. There’s definite improvements to his character this time, but The Doctor being the cause for their current conflict is not one of them. And while we’re on complaints, this serial STILL feels like it stretches its adventure out for the sake of making the serial longer than it should be. There’s some definite excitement in the first half with our core four characters trying to escape the Daleks, but this serial still didn’t need to be seven gosh dang episodes long. I feel like there’s some meat to be cut out with making the Thals stand up for themselves, conceiving a plan of attack, and invading the Daleks’ base. Other than that, this is still a pretty decent serial filled with great tension from the Daleks and strong chemistry and dynamics between our core four. It’s definitely stronger than the last serial and a MUCH better introduction to the series. No wonder it’s the one that Tubi has.
The Edge of Destruction: A nice, short mystery where the first half does really well in making you feel as disoriented as the rest of the cast. There’s this solid unease where you’re not sure what’s going on and you’re left to pick up the pieces, bit by bit, to figure out what happened and if there’s anyone or anything responsible for this mess. Although, part two tends to fall a tad short because most of the clues we got were then explained to the audience and then given this big explanation that came out of left field because the biggest clue wasn’t revealed yet. So as a mystery, it definitely isn’t strong. Though, I do like how The Doctor is the one to figure things out and save the day in this serial. Sure, him being antagonistic towards the others wasn’t great but I enjoy how The Doctor has finally warmed up to his companions and that it’s implied that he no longer chooses to be suspicious of them. So while the mystery fell short, I can’t complain when it improves The Doctor’s character.
Marco Polo: Unavailable on Tubi due to the BBC deleting episodes. Yeah, unfortunately, this is our FIRST serial that can’t be seen in its entirety through official means…Though, no one said anything about using transcripts.
HAHA! Loophole! Because while I’m not going to steal audio-only episodes for the sake of reviews, who’s going to stop me from READING. It’s not stealing episodes if I’m just reading what happens! Although, unfortunately, it only gives me a PART of the picture. I won’t understand performances or fully grasp how characters look, but it’s no different from strictly LISTENING. There’s a lot that unfortunately goes missing when a visual media loses its visuals, and for a case like this it’s best to work with what we have. And what I have is the story pretty much described to me by someone else. It’s not preferable, but it IS what I can do for these times. Remember this every time a studio deletes episodes or entire shows off its platforms.
With that said, based on what I’ve read…Yeah, this one DRAGS. It’s The Doctor and company being forced to move from place to place and dealing with Marco Polo as they do. Doesn’t sound too bad, but each place they go to follows a specific formula: Someone does something Polo doesn’t like, he voices displeasure about it, The Doctor and others argue their case, Tegana points out how they’re actually evil, and Marco Polo, who flips from being reasonably cautious and unreasonably stupid, constantly tells them to get out of his face while still dragging them off to the next location. This goes on for SEVEN EPISODES, each one making the whole serial feel way too long and way too repetitive. I kept hoping this would be the end of the serial and we could move on to the next, only for it to KEEP. F**KING. GOING! It’s so dull that I needed TWO DAYS to read through the damn thing. But maybe that’s the problem: I had to READ it. There might be subtleties in the VISUAL performance that better conveys Marco’s personality, even if it DOES seem to flip/flop on paper. Plus, there are some things like the set designs and special effects that a transcript could gloss over and not properly convey. And there are SOME nice bits like The Doctor trying (and failing) to win the TARDIS back in a game of backgammon, which is all kinds of fun. And Susan made an endearing friendship with Ping-Cho. Those two are surprisingly adorable together and it’s nice to see Susan make a connection with someone her own age. Other than that, though, if this wasn’t that great of a story on paper, the original serial better have some MIND BLOWING execution to make it great. Otherwise, maybe fans aren’t losing much if this serial is lost to time.
The Keys of Marinus: A pretty clever idea with this one. The story for this serial is that The Doctor and his companions are out searching for the titular Keys of Marinus, presenting a story that’s a fetch-quest, with each episode dedicated to the characters finding one key. It’s smart because instead of stretching out one adventure to make the serial longer, it connects four adventures through this loose thread, keeping audience interest up as everyone tries to get out of the danger of the week. It’s fairly effective, filled with great moments like Barbara trying to save the core four from being brainwashed into mindless zombies, the entirety of “The Snows of Terror,” and The Doctor solving a murder. It’s all good fun, but not without some problems. An episode like “The Screaming Jungle” feels like it needs more time as there’s a lot of ideas that don't live up to its full potential or come out of nowhere. Like, a living jungle SOUNDS cool, but it only really comes into fruition until the end. There’s also the fact that the search for the last key feels stretched out because the writers didn’t realize soon enough that the finale for this serial was too short so they made the final hunt longer to compensate. But what bothers me the most is that The Doctor just…leaves the hunt just to spend time in a more civilized society. It works out for the murder mystery, but it also feels weird that the titular character bows out for two whole episodes, leaving his companions to do all of the work he neglects. Honestly, at this point, I’d say Ian should be the one the show is named after with how well he leads the party and even comes up with a clever plan to stop the big bads. And I know I keep harping on it, but why name the show Doctor Who when that same doctor hardly helps? Still, “The Keys of Marinus” is a fun serial that leads to solid short tales, even if there were some rough steps along the way.
The Aztecs: Oh, this one’s racist, isn’t it…? You know what? I’m as white as a ping-pong ball and have the patience of a goldfish to do proper research myself to make any judgments to decide something that I have no official standing on. So I won’t be the one to say what is and isn’t racist…Aside from the fact that those are obviously WHITE people playing the Aztecs.
But possible racism aside, this serial is more on the dull side. I do like this conflict between The Doctor and Barbara, where Barbara tries to change history for what she thinks is for the better (Which means changing the history and culture of Aztecs–Let’s not get into it) where The Doctor tries to convince her that there’s no way to change history. Future episodes continue to dive deep into the idea that history cannot be altered no matter what the characters want, and it’s interesting to see one of the first instances where the characters learn this the hard way. I also love how it ends on this idea that while they couldn’t change what happened, they still touched the lives of those they’ve made relationships with, meaning that it ALL wasn’t a loss. It’s a shining light of optimism within the tragedy that becomes a reoccuring theme through a lot of future episodes, and I love it each time. But other than that, this serial is another one that DRAGS. It’s just The Doctor and his companions screwing around with Aztecs for two hours while this boring subgroup conspired against them. It makes the whole serial feel like it’s running in place for too long, and I feel like if it cut out ONE episode or maybe shorten it down to two, the serial could be stronger for it. It’s also weird how Barbara is, like, a different person in this. Like, I get it, she’s acting like a goddess, but she seems TOO good at her performance, almost as if the writers wrote her as an ACTUAL goddess and not a character PRETENDING to be one. It feels off a lot of the time, and it’s just one more thing that makes this serial weak. Even though I like the idea of characters trying to fight hard to change history, that’s something done MUCH better in the future. It’s a charming first attempt, but not one I’m willing to revisit.
The Sensorites: A pretty…substandard serial. The titular Sensorites start off pretty scary and intimidating, being unlike anything the show has produced so far in this run. It presents a bit of uncanny horror for a good while…But then the serial reveals that they’re mostly peaceful creatures, aside from a few devious outliers, who actually need help. It’s a decent twist that also leads to The Doctor being the most active he’s ever been. The way he goes about finding a cure for this mysterious illness and taking charge in dealing with any dangerous Sensorite made it feel like, for the first time, he deserves to have the show named after him. I like it…but it doesn’t stop the serial feeling like it’s a little aimless at times, almost as if it’s drifting by for six episodes. We get some good stuff from it, but storywise it feels like we’re just bouncing from scene to scene as if the writers are making stuff up as they go and presenting coincidences that foil some villains’ plans. And then there’s this out of nowhere idea that this subgroup of humans lived under the Sensorites for so long, but there was never any indication of this and it’s presented in the VERY LAST episode, making it an almost pointless idea that went nowhere. I’m glad to see The Doctor become more  of a leading man, but I would have preferred it in a better, more coherent serial.
The Reign of Terror: MOST of the serial is intact…aside from two episodes. Meaning that it’s incomplete and not available on Tubi, so…ONTO THE TRANSCRIPT!
On paper, this whole thing seems like a drag. It starts interestingly enough with The Doctor being separated from his companions as they’re taken prisoner during the French Revolution. It leads to Ian, Barbara, and Susan trying to escape while The Doctor tries to reunite with them (instead of pissing off for half the serial), creating this situation where everyone’s putting in the work as they share the same goal. The problem is that, like the REST of the serials before, the characters fart around for too long just to stretch the story out to reach a goal. They will escape and then get recaptured for the sake of forced tension, and by the time Susan and Barbara were in prison again I just wanted the serial to come close to an end. Thankfully, by then, there were two episodes left, but it doesn’t change how it’s all two episodes too long. The only thing to catch my intrigue later was Barbara wishing they could help Robespierre from getting killed and The Doctor reminding her that they can’t change history. I still love an idea like that, but here, it happens near the very end and there’s barely enough time to appreciate it or dive deep into it. In fact, this could have been a great “Can’t mess with the past” episode, but it’s just…the characters trying to escape a situation and spending too long on it. The worst part is that this is the Season One finale, the time to go for broke, and it’s just…the same old thing with the same old problems as previous serials. Maybe it worked better visually or even through audio, but on paper it’s just as slow and boring as ever. Hopefully the next season starts big.
Planet of Giants: Huh. Guess it did. Just…literally.
Jokes aside, I am impressed with the set design in this serial. I can tell everyone worked so hard to set the scale, making you feel how small these characters are. Sure, you can tell exactly HOW it was done, but for the sixties this all must have been mind blowing work, especially for a TV show. As for the story, it’s…adequate. The characters are trying to prevent these two men from making an insecticide that could do more harm than good while also trying to find their way back to the TARDIS to reverse their size. It’s not the BIGGEST (ha) danger in the world and it’s something they could have stopped easily at normal size. If they focussed on growing again, they could have stopped the main evil prick within seconds, so the majority of the serial is just them messing around by trying to stop him while they’re an inch tall. And there’s also the fact that Barabara held the idiot ball throughout the serial, touching something in a lab when she shouldn’t have and keeping that information to herself for far too long. Like, WHY didn’t she tell the others she was infected with the insecticide? We never got an answer for that and it’s kind of frustrating as it adds unnecessary tension to a serial that doesn’t really need it. The characters trying to get big again is more than enough, we don’t need a nefarious plot about an insecticide gone wrong or one of the characters getting sick from it. But while the story definitely could use some improvements, the set design really does carry it, being an impressive visual display even if it’s for an inferior serial.
The Dalek Invasion of Earth: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH, so THAT’S what happened to Susan…Anyways, the best way I could describe this serial is two steps forward and one step back. The cinematography is impressive, looking like a feature film at times with dynamic shots and cool ways that the camera follows the characters. BUT the direction seems to be all over the place. Most of the time, it’s fine, but then you get stuff like actors interrupting or talking over each other or moments where peripheral view is…not a thing. There’s even a part where a Dalek is looking RIGHT AT THE DOCTOR as it’s moving away…and it just continues moving onward as if nothing happened. It’s actually kind of hilarious at times. And speaking of the Daleks, this serial did a great job showcasing how threatening and evil they can really be. The twisted way they used humans as slaves to destroy a planet is sick and seeing how that broke the human mind and ruined their families proved that the Daleks are nothing to be messed with. The problem is that the serial shows how easily they can be messed with. Like, even if they doubt the intelligence of normal Earth people, it’s not a smart plan to have a way for them to escape their prison cell WITHIN THE CELL ITSELF! And how is it that they can blast away people no problem but struggle with the robot slaves they made? I don’t know how it’s possible, but this serial manages to make these tin salt shakers MORE and LESS terrifying. On the upside, our heroes are at least competent in this adventure. Much like the last encounter with the Daleks, everyone does something of value, only this time they’re all split up to accomplish their own task that actually helps the others in a way they wouldn’t expect. It DOES feel like some plot lines are a little aimless with some of our cast waffling about a little longer than they should, but it all leads to a great ending when they reunite once more. 
And, of course, there’s the sad departure of Susan. It’s performed well and does a decent job of making me FEEL a little sad when The Doctor allows Susan to leave so she can live a life of her own without being forced to travel everywhere with him. I liked it…though I do have issues with how the reason that she wants to leave is because she fell in love with a man she’s known for a few days. It’s part of the writing of the sixties, I know that, but it doesn’t change how WEIRD it feels that Susan is willing to give up everything she knows for someone she recently met. So while I enjoyed the scene, it felt very flawed, which is the same for the whole serial. I enjoyed it a lot, but there were a few imperfections here and there that made “The Dalek Invasion of Earth” a messy, albeit fun, serial.
The Rescue: This was a blessedly short serial. The big twist was fairly easy to figure out after Part One, and if this serial was stretched out for more than two parts it would hurt it significantly. We don’t need four parts of the characters farting around, picking up little clues, and then solving the big crisis within minutes. So having the story last for about two episodes leaves for a brief adventure that works well on its own while also introducing the audience to Vicki. And I’ll admit…I’m not too sure about Vicki in this serial. She comes across as a less competent Susan who cries more and doesn’t have the same intrigue Susan did as being The Doctor’s granddaughter. It’s obvious that she’s there as a replacement for the “The Young One” in the group and it doesn’t work for me. What DOES work is how The Doctor is presented, as he acts much more like The Doctor I know now. He’s active towards figuring out what’s going on, caring towards Vicki and consoling her when she needs it, and is the one to confront Bennett in the climax of the serial. I do like how it’s sort of a slow burn with The First Doctor, showing him eventually grow from the bitter old man who couldn’t care less about anyone else to a more kind and proactive character due to the adventures he went on with his companions and the people that they meet. I still say it was off to name the show after the guy who didn’t do much, but The Doctor’s slowly earning his role as the leading man and I enjoyed that this is one of the earlier starts of them becoming the hero we know now. So while this is a standard serial, it does give us one of the better presentations of The First Doctor.
The Romans: *INSERT DATED ROMAN EMPIRE JOKE HERE*
Anywho, this one’s pretty entertaining. There’s basically two sides of this serial’s story: The Doctor and Vicki hanging out with Nero and his hysterical nonsense and Ian and Barbara being stuck in the slave trade…Yeah, probably sounds like the tones would heavily clash with this one, but it surprisingly flows well. You laugh at the hijinks of The Doctor acting as a close friend towards Nero while feeling empathy for Barbara and Ian as they’re forced into the worst possible position in Rome. There’s even equal attention to both plotlines, making them balance each other out fairly well that leads to the serial feeling fast but fun. The only thing that drags it down is how it begins and ends. The cut between the TARDIS falling and The Doctor and Ian chilling out in Roman attire felt jarring. Same goes for the reveal that they willingly stayed in Rome for a whole month instead of focussing all attention on fixing the TARDIS. I suppose it would come across as a pleasant holiday, but then they say they’ve been hanging out in someone else’s house while they were away and that’s…odd. It’s odd that it worked out like that for a whole month. Same goes with the ending, where The Doctor feels giddy at causing the fire of Rome. Even for the First Doctor, it doesn’t seem right that they would take joy in causing such destruction and mayhem. But aside from the problems in the beginning and the end, everything in the middle of the serial offered great entertainment for a pleasant viewing for me.
The Web Planet: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! MY EARS! For whatever bizarre reason or another, SOMEONE decided to give these giant ants the most ear-piercingly irritating sound for how they communicate. It was already grating by the first episode, yet they still thought it was a good idea to use the same sound, continuously, FOR SIX EPISODES! Halfway through the third, I genuinely considered skipping the rest of the serial entirely because I couldn’t STAND those f**king ants! Thankfully, I remembered that subtitles were a thing, so I just played the rest of the serial on mute and just read the subtitles. Trust me when I say that is the only way to make the damn thing watchable. And even then, it’s not that great of a serial anyways. It’s the characters helping these anthropomorphic bugs with slightly less annoying (but still pretty annoying) voices in a rebellion against the ants. I’m all about it, because screw those things, but it’s still a bog-standard adventure with some admittedly impressive costumes and effects for the time. I don’t know, maybe it’s because I couldn’t stand LISTENING to this episode, but I would have been completely fine if this was one of the few serials lost to time.
The Crusade: Speaking of which, HALF of this serial is missing and not on Tubi either. So ONTO THE TRANSCRIPTS (Gosh dang it…)
I think the problem with this serial is made clear with how it begins. We have new characters talking about political nonsense as if we, the audience, should already know the context of what they’re saying. Then when we’re introduced to the core four, they’re thrown into the middle of a battle with no proper set-up that their conflict of Barbara getting kidnapped happened so fast that it barely registers. This slow pace of boring politics with characters we don’t know and fast paced attempts of Barbara trying to escape her kidnappers remains throughout this whole serial. MAYBE it was handled better visually, but the way the serial constantly introduces new characters to discuss politics while The Doctor and his companions are barely there makes the whole thing feel like its priorities are disjointed. There should be more focus on Barbara trying to escape while the others go out to save her, but there’s so much attention on the politics and trying so hard to be historically accurate or whatever and it…doesn’t keep my interest. Not to mention that the constant new characters to keep track of as they steal attention is not all that entertaining and causes the whole serial to seem like it forgets who the show’s really about. I just wanted it all to end, as I feel like this is one of those serials that aren’t better on paper nor through execution.
The Space Museum: This one starts off pretty confusing, first intentionally and then unintentionally. I’m just as lost as the characters are, wondering what happened to them and what’s to come of it. It effectively puts me in the mindset the serial wants me to have, but then they give this explanation that just makes my brain hurt when I try to think about it too long and hard. Thankfully, the premise that the serial tries to sell is simple enough to shrug off the nonsense of time and relative dimension or whatever the hell. Basically, The Doctor and his companions saw a vision of what COULD BE their future, and the whole serial is them trying to make sure that never comes to be. It’s a solid premise that’s effectively tense in a lot of scenes as the characters seemingly get closer to what could be an inevitable future. Added with some fun moments of The Doctor being a giggly old goof as he screws with his enemies and it’s a fun time. The only weak part is this subplot involving the most ineffective rebellion I’ve ever seen, where it’s a miracle that they survived this long until they received help from Vicki of all characters. Though, even then, the subplot does well to show how independent Vicki can be in a situation AND adds to the theme that a person’s future can be changed if they changed the lives of others. It’s a decent message that helps make the serial a surprisingly good time. And yeah, that ending sting made me excited for the next one. Speaking of…
The Chase: This was…not what I was expecting. In the last two encounters with The Daleks, it was a big, tense adventure with the characters struggling to find a way to beat them. Here, it’s more like “The Keys of Marinus,” a collection of small adventures as the characters are chased through space and time as they try to escape The Daleks. It’s less of an epic adventure and more of a mixed bag of fun escapades and…awkward distractions. For example, watching the characters get stuck in a haunted house or fighting a robotic Doctor can be entertaining, but them interacting with this weird, underground civilization or this man from Alabama just drag it to a halt. Thankfully, the worst of it is only in the first half, making it a serial that starts slow but picks up momentum as things go on. There’s also some decent money put into this, having some impressive sets that change each episode, some crazy special effects for the sixties (the part where there’s two Doctors still looks good), and some creative camera angles that give a more cinematic feel. I dare say that this would be an impressively put together serial that is mostly fun despite some awkwardness.
But the real meat of this is that “The Chase” ends with the departure of Ian and Barbara. I will admit, the pacing upon their exit felt a bit too fast, with their decision to leave coming out of nowhere and their return home not giving us enough time to appreciate them appreciating Earth. Although, as weird as the pacing is, The Doctor’s heartbreak to see them go is well-acted and believable. You can tell that he’s less upset about the risk that comes with using The Daleks’ time machine and more upset about the idea that they want to leave in the first place. It’s odd that he feels more upset over two humans than his granddaughter, but this is still a moment that introduces the tragedy of The Doctor. They’re a character that’s always on the move, going from one part of the universe to the next and having to say goodbye to every friend and companion they ever make. They WANT to keep company, but know that their companion’s departure is always inevitable. Yet it breaks their heart just the same. I FEEL that tragedy here way more than with Susan, where The Doctor seemed more than willing to let her live her life. But with Ian and Barbara, these two humans who left an impact on him, they’ll stick with The Doctor’s heart for a long time.
The Time Meddler: The premise of this one is great. A time-traveler disguised as a monk is screwing with time to make himself the most important person in the universe. And The Doctor, being the biggest defender of time and space, tries to stop him. It’s a perfect idea that fits perfectly with who The Doctor is while giving him a true foil that he won’t have again until meeting The Master. It’s actually a ton of fun watching what’s basically the Beta Master trying to mess with history just for the pure selfish reasons of self-importance. And I do say that the serial perfectly captures that idea…by Part Four. Yeah, the majority of the first three parts are about hinting at what The Monk has been doing and padding out the runtime with characters screwing around in the woods or the monastery. By the time we get to Part Four, it does work well with the premise, having The Doctor and The Monk try and outsmart each other for victory with The Doctor, of course,  coming out on top. And I’ll admit that it was great seeing The Doctor take charge without someone else stealing the show as the leading man. What, do you think that the new guy STEVEN is going to take Ian’s place as the take-charge companion? Get the hell out of here…
But, yeah, while the first three parts DRAG, “The Time Meddler” at least ends on a high enough note where I say it was worth the watch. I’ll likely only return to that final episode instead of watching the whole thing, but what are you gonna do?
Galaxy 4: Unfortunately, this is another that’s been deleted from history. HOWEVER, it’s still on Tubi…Sort of. Because the audio logs are still intact, they had the whole serial reanimated by Digitoonz Media & Entertainment. And it’s…distracting. Not because the animation is bad. I mean, yeah, it’s not GREAT, but what’s distracting about it is that the animators tried their hardest to give this serial a cinematic feel, having grandiose backgrounds and doing things the actors and set designers wouldn’t be capable of doing. It’s entertaining to see, but leaves me questioning what the original episodes would have looked like. Because there is NO WAY this animation is an EXACT reenactment of what happens. But I’m not really complaining because there are some good stuff that comes from making this serial animated, like having all of Maaga’s forces exact copies of one another or actually seeing the destruction of the planet as Maaga is forced to watch it fall apart around her. I like a lot of this stuff, despite the distractions. As for the story, it feels blessedly quick, albeit simple. I saw the twist of Maaga and her weird ass clones being the real evil a mile away, but this WAS likely one of the first instances when a story presents the nice looking creatures as evil where the ugly looking ones are good. I can give it a little leeway for that, especially since “Galaxy 4” makes it clear that it’s MAAGA who’s the real villain whereas her clones are more or less drones following orders to appease their crooked master. There’s actually a bit of tragedy to the clones where they don’t get a chance to think on their own and do what their master says because it’s all they know. It effectively makes you feel bad for them as you also feel grateful that Maaga dies knowing it was all for nothing. And, again, it all goes by fairly quickly, making a serial that feels short and to the point. I couldn’t ask for better and I REALLY wish there were more lost episodes that were animated. Would have at least made for a more unique experience than reading transcripts to ones that are lost.
Mission to the Unknown: Speak of the devil! At least it’s only ONE episode…And a pretty decent one at that.
This is the first time where we don’t follow The Doctor or any of their companions, but instead some one-off characters. This would happen on occasion, with one of the most popular examples being the episode “Blink,” showing great tension as we watch these characters try to survive without a Doctor to save them. It’s no different here, as “Mission to the Unknown” features two men trying to warn the galaxy of a master plan of the Daleks, setting up a future serial while also standing well on its own for a quick adventure that ends in unfortunate death. It doesn’t give us enough time to really CARE about them, but that might have something to do with me reading it too fast. It’s still a solid episode that leaves one fearing for what’s to come later.
The Myth Makers: And another for the transcripts. Son of a bitch…
It’s not easy to tell strictly through text, but I think this is meant to be a more comedic adventure. In past serials like “Marco Polo” and “The Crusade,” they bore me by forcing in politics and dull characters, likely for the sake of “Historical accuracy.” Here, it’s The Doctor and his companions dealing with idiots on both sides of the Trojan War, with historical accuracy most definitely thrown out the window as people are more familiar with the version in Homer’s Odyssey. It is much more entertaining to see The Doctor try to appeal to the whims of a meathead like Odysseus and watching Priam and his family bicker about Cassandra and the legitimacy of her visions, rather than getting lost in the politics. It’s fun, but I’m curious if it’s meant to be. You have obvious comedic moments like Steven’s quickly failed rescue attempt and Menelaus wanting a drink after hearing The Doctor’s Trojan Horse plan, but the majority of the lines also don’t strike me as TOO humorous. That’s largely because the way an actor delivers a line versus how it’s written can give two different reactions, and it’s why READING the lines doesn’t leave as big of a comedic punch as hearing an actor say it in a funny way.
“Well, then listen to the audio versions.”
I’VE READ SO MANY TRANSCRIPTS AT THIS POINT! I’M IN TOO DEEP NOW!
But I will say that if the point WAS to make this adventure more comedic, then it makes the inevitable fall of Troy feel all the more tragic. I didn’t want the Trojans to die! They were FUNNY! And because they made me laugh a little, it hurt seeing them killed, even if I should have expected from the beginning.
One thing I didn’t expect, though, was that this was Vicki’s departure. Which I wouldn’t have minded if not for how it’s weirdly unceremoniously done. There’s no final goodbye and it feels like it breezes past The Doctor saying he’ll miss her. And her reasoning is just…dull. She leaves because she liked a boy, much like how SUSAN left. I guess there WAS a bit of foreshadowing given how Priam changes Vicki’s name to Cressida, a female character in retellings of the Trojan War who famously falls for Troilus. But even then, it still feels weak and even strange that Vicki would willingly choose to stay in a time she doesn’t live in for Troilus, a boy she knew for about two days. I know it’s something that just…happens back then in 60s fiction, but makes for an off addition to an already entertaining serial.
The Daleks’ Master Plan: SWEET MOTHER OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, this is the LONGEST serial yet! Possibly the longest serial in the show’s history! And the weirdest part is that only three episodes of it still exist, which is crazy not only because of the length but also because it features The Daleks. Even back then, it’s pretty clear that The Daleks are the fan favorite villains of the series, with the writers inserting them in when they can. And you would think that major characters such as them would be more valuable to protect, but no. All we have are mostly audio logs…And transcripts for yours truly.
Which is a shame too, because…this is a frickin’ GOOD one! Quite possibly the best serial I’ve ever read yet! The plot is basically characters playing keep away from each other, chasing after this insanely impressive element that The Daleks want to use for another doomsday weapon. And I just loved that the second The Doctor saw The Daleks, he knew that they needed to be stopped. He wasn’t forced into it or was trying to survive The Daleks attacking first. After three whole adventures of dealing with them, The Doctor finally put two and two together to realize that The Daleks just existing is enough to know that nothing good can come from it. So he takes charge on an adventure that’s definitely a little too long but reads as incredibly grand. It’s sort of a repeat of “The Chase,” where The Doctor and company go from place to place, planet to planet, so they can avoid The Dalek’s capture, but there’s some things that make this serial stronger. For one, the stakes feel real this time, with characters who assist The Doctor and Steven on their journey getting killed unceremoniously or tragically. You’re given enough time with Bret, Katarina, and Sara that when they meet their end for the sake of saving the group, it makes you feel a little something. The whole serial comes to a close with this idea that while victory was met in the end, The Doctor and Steven still take a moment to reflect on the lives they lost to win. It really sets how grim and deadly this adventure was, showing characters could die whether they’re ones you care about or even enemies to The Doctor. Speaking of, this serial also works in giving more unique foes outside of STRICTLY The Daleks. You have Chen, an arrogant and egotistical dilweed who’s maniac drive to be ruler of the Universe and doing anything to get it makes you enjoy his untimely demise all the more. There’s even a surprise return of The Monk, who sets himself more as this pathetic failure of a villain as he stumbles constantly to one-up The Doctor only to be outsmarted every turn. Both mix things up well while also making it clear that The Daleks are the real threats as Chen and The Monk follow every command due to fearing for their safety. It helps make the serial feel like a more unique adventure compared to past ones with The Daleks, adding more life, energy, and intensity to it. The only time I was taken out of the whole thing was this random Christmas special that got inserted halfway through. It distracted from the plot way too long and was filled with jokes that were probably funny VISUALLY and maybe AUDIBLY, but not so much when you’re reading it…like I did. Still, that’s ONE episode in a twelve episode long serial. Being entertained with eleven out of twelve episodes is still a great feat that makes “The Daleks’ Master Plan” a masterclass serial. Now can we go back to actually WATCHING these episodes again?
The Massacre: Guess not…
And this one’s one of the worst, if not THE worst. “The Massacre” has the same problems as “The Crusade.” So much of this serial is focussing on the politics of the historical event taking place, watching these characters you barely give a shit about with the main cast you love getting pushed to the sidelines. Except that while “The Crusade” had the charming cast of THE DOCTOR, Ian, Barbara, and even Vicki, “The Massacre” focuses on Steven. And I’ll get into the specifics in a moment, but I do NOT care for Steven. So to have four episodes focusing on boring historical politics and a character I do not like, it’s pretty easy to pick up why I dislike this serial the most out of all of them. I’m not kidding when I say that the best part about it is the moment where it seemed like Steven was leaving. Before you say anything, it’s not because it gave me hope that Steven was gone for good…Okay, it’s partially because of that, but it’s mostly because of this moment where The Doctor reflects on the people in his life and how he misses them. He even corrects HIMSELF when getting Ian’s last name wrong, showing us that he cares enough to get it right now because he misses his friend. It’s a bittersweet moment that proves how much The Doctor loves each companion they’ve made, even the first few people they’ve met in this first life. It was beautiful…and then it got undercut immediately to introduce Dodo and shove Steven back in as he changed his mind. The one thing I liked about this serial, and it’s ruined by itself. Yeah, this one’s definitely the worst, and I’m not missing it.
The Ark: FINALLY, something I don’t have to READ!
“The Ark” surprised me for a second. I knew going in that it was a four-part-long serial, but by the time Part Two met its end I was confused. It seemed like the story was wrapping up as The Doctor and company cured a ship of the common cold and went off to a new adventure. Only for the TARDIS to appear in the same exact spot many years later with a new problem caused by their actions in the past. Already, I love this premise. We almost never return to the same place twice with The Doctor, where after they save people from this great threat they always head off, assuming everything is fine. This is the first time we actually see what happened to the people that The Doctor saved, only to find out something worse happened to them. It’s a solid premise with good enough execution. I like that this whole thing started with an accident. Dodo just happened to have a cold and didn’t expect the consequences that could come to a species that never experienced it. It puts The Doctor and company in a situation where you don’t BLAME them for what happened but you understand that they have to clean up this mess they caused. I also find it brilliant that the first half of the serial has The Doctor and his companions dealing with rouge Guardians and the second is rouge Monoids, giving this message that both parties aren’t innocent creatures and that peace can only be made when they learn to live together instead of treating one species as slaves. It’s a bit muddled as we don’t really see much of the extent that the Guardians treat the Monoids and how disrespected they are. It gives the idea that the creepy-looking creatures who look different are more at fault, especially since the human Guardians are the ones who assist The Doctor in both halves. There’s never any assistance from the Monoids, which makes it feel like peace might not be the best option. I wouldn’t harp on it if not for the fact that several serials back in “Galaxy 4,” we had the same message of “The ugly ones aren’t evil” with decent results. Still, the idea and meaning is clear as no one’s really, wholly good. Just could have used some cleaning up on showing the good side of the Monoids, making “The Ark” having a strong story ARC.
HAHAHA–Kill me. Next one!
The Celestial Toymaker: All but the last part of this serial is missing, so…onto the transcripts.
I mean it, kill me.
(I don’t actually mean it. Just…been doing this for a while)
This serial introduces The Toymaker, a character that would only reappear once more…fifty-seven years later with the incomparable Niel Patrick Harris playing the role. And speaking as someone who got introduced to this character through NPH doing random accents and a random ass dance sequence to “Spice Up Your Life,” I wasn’t sure what to expect from the version in the sixties. Turns out, while he’s not as bombastic and jovial as Niel Patrick Harris, The Toymaker is still the most unique villain that The Doctor and others have come across so far. The Doctor isn’t kidding when he says that The Toymaker loves using people as his playthings, sending out dolls, board games, playing cards, and all sorts of other traps to entertain himself with The Doctor and his companions. And while Steven and Dodo aren’t the best duo in the world,, they’re at least paired up with despicable and hilariously incompetent antagonists as The Toymaker sends out his toys against them. You’re entertained by them, but at the same time you feel bad for them when they fail because they’re all trapped souls captured by The Toymaker. Or are they? The serial cleverly keeps you guessing whether or not these toys were once people, leaving it up to interpretation on if it’s all a part of a trick he’s playing. It adds a bit of tragedy to the goofs and gags, which I certainly appreciate. Then you have The Doctor’s game with The Toymaker that adds intensity, as he’s trying his best to stall to win the game until Steven and Dodo find the TARDIS. And, sure, I would have loved MORE to actually SEE The Doctor beat The Toymaker in a battle of wits as opposed to watching Steven and Dodo going through a goofy, silly adventure, I’m not complaining too much for the end result. “The Celestial Toymaker” is still an incredibly entertaining serial that has every character working well together to survive and being competent as they win their own game. Although, I do have to call nonsense towards Fourteen in “The Giggle.” Saying that cheating is the last thing The Toymaker would do when that’s all he does in this serial…Nonsense.
The Gunfighters: This serial finds the characters in a wild, wild west adventure, and this one’s definitely meant to be a more entertaining ride rather than an epic adventure with huge stakes. You’ve got fun stuff like Steven being forced to sing at gunpoint, an outlaw playing dentist as he rips out The Doctor’s tooth, Dodo fainting as she attempts to hold a man at gunpoint, and British people trying to do western accents. It’s definitely a good time, but it also feels like the writers leaned too hard into this being a western. All the tropes and cliches seem present and it’s definitely enjoyable, but it doesn’t feel like a Doctor Who story. The characters are pretty much in the background as we follow the narrative threads of these outlaws and a sheriff. Sure, they’re entertaining as well and don’t make the serial drag like “The Crusade” and “The Massacre” did, but at the cost of abandoning who we really follow this series for: The Doctor and his companions. What’s crazy is that ten (eleven?) regenerations later, The Doctor would go on another wild west adventure, facing down a space robot playing bounty hunter as The Doctor protects a town that’s inexperienced with this kind of threat. Not only does that episode have a concept that works perfectly for this show but it makes the story revolve around The Doctor and his companions trying to save this town. In “The Gunfighters,” The Doctor and company are pretty much absent for most of the story, either being dragged along by characters with more narrative importance, or stepping out of the entire climax. And yes, there are instances when the show follows random characters for the entirety of a story, but that’s still done in a way that it feels like it matches the show. Like how in “Mission of the Unknown,” where we follow characters trying desperately to stop The Daleks. Goofy or intense sci-fi nonsense and seeing The Doctor and co. reacting to history is what makes Doctor Who one of the most engaging science fiction shows ever made. While a western can be entertaining, something like “The Gunfighters” tends to make you forget what show you’re watching.
The Savages: Deleted. And a shame too, because this is another good one. The concept of this civilized society using living people as an energy source is already chilling, and the serial does well in showing how messed up it is for the supposed Savages. Though, if this was written in Modern Doctor Who, I feel like  the results of this power draining would be MUCH darker. Especially if Steven Moffat wrote the episode (The sick bastard). As is, it’s still great with how they made the power draining as dark as it could be for the sixties, all while adding a classist message that still manages to work NOW with its themes of the high and mighty sucking the life of what they think is savage. I love it and I also adore how The Doctor quickly picked up on how sick this whole idea is, wanting to shut the whole thing down immediately. THAT’S The Doctor I know, and it’s pretty fun that what saved the day is their leader taking some of The Doctor’s essence. Even when temporarily beaten, The Doctor still wins.
It’s all pretty great, but do you wanna know what’s better? STEVEN! IS! GONE!
Again, I’ll get to WHY later, but I am so glad to see Steven go. He wasn’t really the best companion out there and it is pretty nice that in his last adventure with The Doctor it’s all about Steven finally learning how to be useful. It’s to better sell that he’d be a capable leader to these people and…under his leadership, they’d probably die, but I can take it. Seeing Steven gone makes me willing to accept any nonsense of making him a leader and it’s nice that the show lets him leave with dignity. Even with the worst companions, it’s great the show at least treats them as people and lets ones like Steven leave happy enough instead of injecting him out the airlock or something. His departure is very welcomed and makes this serial stand out a little higher.
The War Machines: The final serial available on Tubi, and it’s…alright? Yeah, I honestly have no strong feelings one way or the other towards this one. The premise itself is what I love to see in Doctor Who, as this machine meant to help humanity ends up wanting to conquer it, with The Doctor being a key factor in securing the victory only to become the machine’s downfall. It’s all decent enough, with actors doing well at portraying these disturbingly obedient human puppets and there being some impressive puppetry on display with WANTON’s war machines. But as decent as it all is, none of it really WOWED me. The techno babble that The Doctor used to explain how he outsmarted and bested the war machines lost me due to how convoluted it was. Same goes for how WANTON was able to hypnotize human beings. I don’t even know if it was ever explained because of how much non-scientific science was thrown in this entire serial. It’s the central part of this entire premise, and it makes little sense how a computer was able to hypnotize anyone, even if it was supposedly advanced.
Another thing that bothers me about this serial is that this is supposed to be Dodo’s exit. She’s out for half the adventure and doesn’t even get to say goodbye in person. She just takes a nap, lets her replacements do most of the work, and then she’s gone for good. It feels cheap and gives her the weakest exit out of any companion in this run. Possibly the weakest exit ever. It’s another little aspect that makes the serial not BAD but not outstanding, either.
The Smugglers: Not much to say about this one. Just a fast romp as The Doctor and his companions fend off pirates in their hunt for a legendary treasure. It drags a little bit and there’s a lot of flip-flopping in terms of certain characters’ loyalty, but it has some fun moments, like The Doctor outsmarting opponents and Ben and Polly proving their worth as companions fairly quickly. Not a spectacular adventure, but entertaining enough.
The Tenth Planet: Here it is. The final serial in the First Doctor’s run…And it’s incomplete.
Yeah, the final adventure with William Hartnell’s Doctor, and you can’t see it in its entirety. You can watch the first three parts, but the fourth? Not a chance. It’s quite disappointing and, you know what? If I could cheat with his first adventure, I can cheat with his last. Let’s use “other means” than Tubi to watch those first three episodes and read what happens next.
And I’ll just say…it’s ALMOST perfect. It has a STRONG premise, introducing the Cybermen, a longtime enemy of The Doctor. It was so fascinating to see how humanlike these monsters began, moving and speaking like everyday men just with a slight robotic lean to it. It actually makes the more robotic, emotionless Cybermen more chilling in the modern age as it now becomes clear that the Cybermen perfected their goal to be more robot than human. The serial also cleverly makes it where the Cybermen aren’t the ONLY threat. I truly love that the bitter and impulsive General Cutler is just as much of an antagonist as the Cybermen are, with his desire to kill them before they kill Earth being potentially more damaging if he ever got away with his plans. It goes along with a recurring theme of this show in the modern age where those who try to be the victor in an unnecessary war tend to destroy themselves. Cutler dies because he attracted Cybermen attention with the warhead and the Cybermen die because their planet burned up when they could have asked for assistance with their problem instead of destroying the Earth for survival. It’s handled really well, with Polly and Ben still continuing to be useful additions to the cast as they do all they can to stop both Cutler and the Cybermen. Mainly because they have to with The Doctor checking out for when things get their most deadly.
Speaking of, the one thing that holds the serial back is The First Doctor’s exit. This was his final adventure, and he doesn’t do much aside from telling people what to do and taking a nap. By the time his regeneration begins, it all goes by so fast that it feels like he’s being rushed out the door. In a way…he kind of is. Due to age catching up with him, William Hartnell was forced to leave the show because his memory problems and exhaustion were getting difficult to film around. So now they had to get him out of the show for his own good, all while making one last serial as a final goodbye to this actor. However, it doesn’t change how…off his farewell feels. He’s not the triumphant hero who stopped The Cybermen and he didn’t get any final words to make his goodbye feel haunting or bittersweet. Future Doctors got this chance, even ones who decided to leave on their own accord like David Tennant or Matt Smith. It’s actually kind of sad that William Hartnel didn’t get the same treatment and that the writers would only learn their lesson for FUTURE generations. His flawed departure is the one thing that holds back what is admittedly a well-made serial.
And that’s it. That’s the last adventure with The First Doctor. But before I talk about my overall thoughts with this man, I should first discuss some other characters. Characters who are important to any Doctor no matter WHO (haha) they are…
THE COMPANIONS
Doctor Who would not be the show that it is without the companions. They’re frequently the audience surrogates, experiencing new adventures alongside The Doctor while assisting them across space and time. One thing that Chris Chibnall did correctly is point out that the companions are the true power of The Doctor and are worth talking about within the same breath. However, it DOES get a little tricky on who’s considered a companion or not. And trust me when I say it’ll get trickier as time goes on. So, for the sake of sanity, I’ll say that a companion is a recurring character who travels with The Doctor in the TARDIS and is there for more than one episode (Or serial, in this case). With those rules that I’ll probably break in the future out of the way, let’s begin with each companion as they left us.
Susan: I have…complicated feelings towards Susan. She had great chemistry within the group, did well as the wide-eyed, naive child who was excited for everything, and I was truly sad to see her go…But while my heart was sad, my ears were eternally grateful.
Yeah, as sweet a character as Susan is, she wouldn’t. Stop. F**KING. SCREAMING. Every time danger happened, she would always go, “AH! AH! GRANDFATHER! IAN! BARBARA! AH-AH!” Everytime. And when Susan was part of the group, having fun with them, being just as silly as the others, THAT’S when Susan worked. She was “The Young One,” acting as someone who the others would look after but still treat with respect as they knew Susan was capable of so much more than SCREAMING. As a member of the group, Susan worked great. As someone who could face danger…Let’s just say that my ears will be bleeding less now that she’s gone.
Ian: It’s weird that a college professor has more of a hero’s heart than the titular character of our show, but I’m not entirely complaining. Ian was a solid companion, willing to take charge for the sake of the group and having some great interactions with The Doctor. You could tell he wanted to strangle the old man, but also enjoyed The Doctor’s company as they shared a similar spirit. They both consider themselves leaders of the party and find conflict when one has an idea they believe is better than the other’s. After a while, they learn to work together and you feel that trust they have thanks to them realizing they’re basically the same kind of men who want the same kind of things. It DOES tend to feel that Ian steals the show at times, but it doesn’t change how much of an entertaining and perhaps even inspiring character Ian can be. He went through so much for The Doctor and the others, being the hero that they need and being charming as hell when doing it.
Barbara: Barbara’s sort of the character that has a well-defined relationship with everyone in the TARDIS. She’s a supportive, motherly figure to Susan and Vicki, treating them with respect while calming them down during intense times. With Ian, she’s a good friend and ONLY a friend. I’m actually glad that she was never forced into a love-interest role with him. There were so many moments where that could have been a possibility with how often those two are paired together, but it’s nice that they remained as close friends who can rely and help one another when the time comes. Not every man and woman needs to end up dating in the end. As for how Barbara is with The Doctor, where Ian and The Doctor are the same in a goal-driven level, The Doctor and Barbara are the same through an INTELLECTUAL one. They often share the same kind of thoughts and curiosity for each adventure they go on, and when they argue, you can tell it’s between two people who are of the same mind but with different opinions. It’s done well and I appreciate seeing these two interact the most. I also appreciate that Barbara stood strong in the face of danger, being just as valuable of a helping hand as the others are and not being a damsel in distress. Sure, she was like that SOMETIMES, but for the sixties this was likely the most independent a woman could get on television. Barbara was a strong character, and likely my favorite amongst the original companions.
Vicki: I was very worried that Vicki was going to turn out to be Susan 2.0, and in a lot of ways, she is. She was very much the young one who was commonly paired up with The Doctor or Barbara as she oozed with childish naivety. Even her exit was nearly identical to Susan’s, except that Susan’s was handled better because The Doctor at least said goodbye. Still, while very similar to Susan, there were some things that I did like a little more with Vicki. For one, she didn’t scream as much…thank FRICK! And two, she was a bit more proactive. Instead of screaming for Ian, Barabara, and The Doctor, Vicki found solutions herself and was frequently the one who helped save the day. I appreciate that, as it helps set her apart more from Susan and gives fans a different kind of naive character that’s endearing in her OWN way. I will say that it feels weird that The Doctor treats Vicki with more respect than his actual GRANDDAUGHTER at times, but this one isn’t screaming too often, so I don’t blame him. Vicki’s a little too much the same, but in some ways, I’d definitely say she’s a bit of an improvement, as mean as it is to admit.
Katarina: Does she count? She doesn’t really go past a single serial…Aw, screw it. She traveled in the TARDIS and helped the group for some time. I’ll say she counts.
And there’s not much to say about Katarina. She was along for the ride for such a short time, not really given a chance to stand out between the young characters like Susan or Vicki. There is this bit of naivety due to her seeing technology for the first time and mistaking The Doctor as a god, but there’s not enough time to develop that idea further and show her capabilities. I will say, though, that she gets the DARKEST exit of any companion I’ve seen. It’s sudden and unceremonious, dying because of some stupid maniac trying to escape his personal Hell. What’s worse is that it’s left to interpretation as to whether or not her death was an accident. Because she was from the distant past and had no knowledge of technology or buttons, it’s unknown if she sacrificed herself to stop the others from going back to The Daleks or because she didn’t know what button opened the door. A character that got to see the universe for the first time, thinking she was a part of something perfect, only to die in an unpredictable circumstance. She had a short amount of time, but I’m with The Doctor. I hope she found that perfection.
Steven: I. Do. NOT care for Steven. It feels like the writers were trying to make him Ian’s replacement as the heroic figure that was often at odds with The Doctor. Except that Steven is very much NOT that. He’s more like this bumbling buffoon who caused more problems as he constantly needed to be rescued by The Doctor and even Vicki at times. The very SECOND that proves how useless he could be was during his introduction when he ran to get back his teddy bear during a grueling escape from The Daleks. You COULD make the argument that the writers wanted to slowly develop Steven into a more heroic character, but there was barely any progression with him constantly being the butt of every joke. The only time he felt useful was during his last appearance, which I can appreciate. Again, they let him leave with some dignity intact and I’m grateful that he and The Doctor left on good terms. The two of them had a lot of one-on-one times with Steven having a great amount of trust towards The Doctor despite the constant jabs The Doctor gave. The Doctor admires every companion he lets tag along, and I love that it’s no different with Steven, even if I was more glad to see him gone.
Dodo: I…am incredibly indifferent towards Dodo. I don’t HATE her, I guess I could say that. She never really made my ears bleed like Susan did, but, at the same time, she wasn’t really the most useful companion. Dodo was either a damsel for The Doctor to save or someone that CAUSED a problem instead of leading to a solution. In a way, she’s more of what I expected Vicki to be: A downgrade rather than an upgrade who never really got a chance to shine as a worthy member of the group. Even Steven seemed more proactive than her, and that is a crime. And I’m pretty sure even the writers weren’t sure what to do with her either, given how they just…kicked Dodo out of the series without any proper exit. If Steven could get a proper ending, then so could Dodo. Regardless, I wouldn’t exactly say I’m going to miss her. Not too much, anyway. I didn’t mind her existence in the show, but I won’t lose sleep with her being gone. Sorry.
Ben and Polly: Yeah, might as well lump these two together. They weren’t on this run for long, and I assume they’ll be more dynamic characters when we talk about Number Two. For now, I’ll say that they’re fairly useful, saving the day with cunning and bravery. I wish Ben was a LITTLE less whiny and Polly a lot less of a damsel, but who knows? Maybe they’ll improve with The Second Doctor.
But that’s enough with the companions. Let’s finally talk about the man who started it all…
THE DOCTOR
The Doctor, no matter the iteration, is one of my favorite fictional characters. I ADORE a character who solves problems through wit, prefers not to use violence but will if pushed to their limits, and is the kindest being in the universe who will also destroy you if you hurt anyone they love. The Doctor is a being of many contradictions, who’s personality may fluctuate throughout the generations but still, at their core, is a caring being who won’t let ANYTHING stop them from doing what’s right.
…So to see The Doctor start off as this old fart who constantly complains while everyone does everything, causes problems for others, and sometimes cowardly bends to the will of enemies was a definite SHOCK to the system. The Doctor did NOT start out as the nobel hero I know them now as. It was actually kind of frustrating to see him stand off to the side while Ian took charge of everything. THIS would be the person who defeated countless enemies all over the universe? The person who sets out to save lives and regrets the ones they lost? That all started with someone who purposely trapped him and his companions on a distant planet just so they could explore? I couldn’t believe it, but thankfully the writers knew this neat little trick to storytelling: Character development.
Slowly but surely, The First Doctor does become more and more like the character I now adore. He fought Daleks after knowing how dangerous they are, weeped for the friends he had to let go, and outsmarted enemies rather than overpower them. He even gained The Doctor’s silliness and sense of humor. Just look at his grin as he scared enemies off after pretending to be a Dalek. The man relished in the chaos he brought, and it was fun to see…Except when he got giddy for being the one who caused Rome to burn down to the ground. Still have no idea what that was about.
Now, things weren’t always perfect. The First Doctor, while improved over time, still never became the heroic badass I know him NOW as, relying on his companions to do most of the work while he’s off having his own fun. Still, that’s where him being the FIRST comes into play. I can absolutely buy that it would take a few regenerations before he became The Doctor I know and love. As is, I’ll say that The First Doctor is an interesting, albeit off-putting, look into what The Doctor USED to be. It wasn’t always good, but I had my fun and I’ll miss this goofy old man.
And with that, we close off The First Doctor’s run. Most of it was fun, a lot was more dull than I expected it to be, and there were both good and bad surprises given to me through this journey into The First Doctor's adventures. It was great to finally see how this show I love started out, and it’s only the beginning from here. Tune in next time when it’s out with the old and in with the…significantly less old as we talk about The Second Doctor’s run.
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chandajaan · 3 months ago
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Chiming in with my wish list!!
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A needlessly fancy OUB toothbrush, a rabbit night light, le labo jasmin 17 (thé noir is actually my favourite le labo but it's a close friend's signature scent, perhaps why I like it so much), and a jellycat lamb!! I also just crossed off this tortoise shell headband from the list today
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Ohhhh I think we're kinda familiar because, I also really want the jasmine lelabo scent and tortoise pattern is so in for me rn! That toothbrush is veryy nice 👌 and I just got the bibbly bobbly sheep jellycat so we are twinnssss
Anyway here's Barnabas and this plate set I was considering getting a while back,
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yandere-daydreams · 1 year ago
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ask a pretty girl disaster homo disaster what their fave Barbie movie is and they’re definitely saying Barbie mariposa and the fairy princess/princess charm school. It’s me. I’m the disaster pretty girl homo.
admittedly i haven't gotten to princess charm school yet, but i am such a barbie mariposa defender in a way that is so deeply humiliatingly. her character design holds a special place in my heart just because she's still barbie, but they do make an effort to just,,, differentiate her a little with her cute streaked hair and dimples and stuff,,, plus the redemption arc and the hot gay villain are things that were made to appeal to me personally. they do sorta soften her up in the second movie and dampen her whole 'reserved loner who is socially isolated in a healthy way' thing (AND THEY GOT RID OF ZINZIE AND REPLACED HER WITH THOSE BOOTLEG BIBBLES,,, THE NERVE OF IT ALL), but i love the audacity it takes to make a whole ass movie about racism staring two of the blondest women i've ever seen. my only complaint is that they didn't pull a mermaidia at the end and reveal that the prince had fallen for willow while they were doing cute library things together, but, y'know, i'm willing to recognize that's a sentence that literally only makes sense to me and live with it i guess.
anyway long live the queen.
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merlin-wolfgang-trades-hale · 10 months ago
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Something that's always fascinated me and sometimes really fucking frustrates me were the translations of names or where some names come from other names.
A lot of us know that funny bit of "How the fuck do you get Dick from Richard?!" "You ask him nicely."
I personally, still don't fucking get how Peggy comes from Margaret or Ned comes from Edward. I honestly just thought Ned was its own name.
You have other examples of like how from English to Spanish Michael becomes Miguel. There's some logic that I've just accepted.
But! Adam in Spanish becomes Adan. First few times I heard a Spanish relative say that name, it was speaking about Adam and Eve from the Bibble, but I shrugged it off because...I don't really know. But then when visiting my Catholic family I saw it spelled out! Idk why Adam become Adan trips me up more than Eve becoming Eva does, because her name changes too.
Anyway, names are weird. Translation rules are a trip.
[[This isn't even tapping into Mexican nickname culture. I have a cousin who all of my life have heard him be referred to as Chetos, cos they were his fave snack as a wee child and you'd always see him with his flamin' hots. When we got to that school portion where I was a junior and he was a freshman at the same school, I heard a coach call out to him and I was like, "WHOM THE FUCKETH IS HE TALKING TO?????" and that's when I learned my cousin's government name.]]
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expfcultragreen · 9 months ago
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Wait theres actually dragons in the bibble?
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Hahahaha ok why did i think thomas harris came up with red dragon as a like "this guys crazy so this is what he calls satan as a nickname" kind of thing.... this is so DnD.....
I think bibblical dragons are probably like, modern dragons; large pet lizards. They probs had some cool ones....
Like on the basis of someone having wanted to talk in my head about "brass dragon" while i was fullblown and me assuming it was just a riff on thomas harris's red dragon, and me only recently finding out thats from dnd (which, i assumed the dragon stuff was defo just masonic millennials [or their future ghosts; nice deniability factor there] playing with me) im thinking............damn yknow, its too bad i was right all along, thats less cool. Anyway MY dragon lore slaps, dont @ me about it
This is because of the dragonberry bushes in the story. Someone got hung up on the dragon issue. Im looking at YOU marty
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toytulini · 1 year ago
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I saw Barbie last night, I dont think i have a long film review of it for yall but idk I'll put some thoughts under a readmore I guess?
-Right off the bat, I enjoyed it, it was fun. It was a fun pink poppy romp. Thats about what I expected of it, and thats pretty much what I got
-Its not particularly radical in its gender/feminism takes, its very basic, which, I saw a number of ppl mention that before I saw it so I wasnt expecting anything radical. It couldve done better. it was. fine. im shrug about it i guess.
-My mom enjoyed it and was apparently not expecting any sort of emotional depth or story at all so it caught her off guard. I heard her crying. she cries easy at movies. I'm glad my mom liked it. Maybe she'll absorb some of the very basic feminism it drops idk.
-I knew the Kens adopted patriarchy and introduced it to Barbieland but it felt lile that happened very fast, idk.
-The ending....I. is her going to a gynecologist supposed to be like. shes gotten a vagina by deciding to be human?? or is she trying to schedule a surgery or something? that felt pretty weird to me if im honest, i thought it was gonna be a job interview or smth... Especially with how everyone was like "Barbie is ace (heheeh i agree) cos she has no genitals! (sorry what. excuse me. wanna run that by me again?)" like okay that makes that headcanon reasoning even more dewply uncomfortable that it already was?
-I enjoyed weird Barbie. i wish theyd cast someone else cos iirc ka/te mckin/non was a transmisogynist? unless she apologized or said she changed her mind on the topic since like 2017?? but i havent seen anything? idk. just. annoying to keep platforming these ppl. i guess theres probably other actors involved that have shit views of trans ppl. whatever i guess.
-I did dress up a little. i feel like my outfit had Weird Barbie Vibes. maybe ill post a pic.
-I did enjoy it and it had a number of shots and or transitions i liked, i think the one with the disco ball to the moon or whatever was enjoyable.
-god we really are so weird about barbie
-it just feels factually incorrect that all dolls pre barbie were baby dolls? idk. im sure it was the most common kind. but idk. not to be weird about The History Of Dolls but like. the porcelain dolls from the Victorian era. idk if those count as baby dolls. iirc those were to help young girls practice prepping dead bodies of loved ones for funerals or smth??? but i guess porcelain dolls have a sort of babyish look about them. and are fragile so you cant play rough with them.
-Like i Know its a 2hr long toy commercial for mattel but also god that cant be right. even if they werent filling the same niche as barbie as idk basically a fashion doll? there had to be other dolls right?
-I know the flat foot thing is Supposed to be over the top and silly for them all to get upset about but also tbh. as a bitch with falling arches the way some of yall make jokes about flat feet still is uh. well. rude. but also lmao man. the day my arches started hurting for no reason while i was barefoot did sorta feel emotionally like her feet falling to the ground lol.
-i want to introduce barbie to margot robbie's harley quinn owo. i think that would be Fun :3
-i want Ken's job. how do i do Beach as an occupation.
-I actually liked how they handled Ken and Barbie's rship til the end. i feel weird about that ending overall and also it feels weak wrt her dynamic as Ken. they make him grapple w her not reciprocating his feelings the same way but then she just leaves barbieland anyway?? and ig they dont get to explore a friendship or qpr dynamic. ok. its fine i guess.
-her saying she has no genitalia felt so transgender in a way im not sure it was intended to. ken saying he has all of the genitalia felt even more transgender. headcanoning them both as extremely transgender in fun weird new ways and no one can stop me.
-Allan is my favorite character i think. bro me too
-bibbleless movie. add bibble.
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#toy txt post#barbie spoilers#barbie movie#everyone kept trying to get my dad to come see it and like.i get it.but genuinely he would hate it even if not for his conservative bullshit#he hates goofy fun movies. OR. he wouldve actually enjoyed it a little bit and been REALLY ANNOYING ABOUT IT bc he would never admit it#and insist he hated it#and hed enjoy the ken patriarchy thing too much#basically im very glad we didnt drag my dad along cos i have to live with him and i think he would be insufferable about it#he has no appreciation for any kind of whimsy or fun! he would hate this silly movie#also this was the first time id been in a movie theater since pre2020.#i enjoyed dressing up in a silly little outfit. but i think i wouldve been happier to wait for it to be out of theaters tbh. theaters teste#tested my patience even before covid like oh im gonna sit uncomfortably in this chair and crane my neck up at this screen and i cant pause#it and theres no captions and people are Eating all around me and now i go and its all the same but im the only one wearing a mask so i dont#get to have a lil snack either and i still have to hear ppl eating around me and part way thru the movie someone across the aisle was making#some kind of horrible very wet and loud gulping noise with their drink or Something?? and i did feel violent about it#i would never be violent about it but my god do i feel like biting. you know. anyway. not sure if ill bother seeing any more movies#in theater now. i just would like them at home. idk#i will give props to barbie. it was like kovie theater loud but at least it wasnt giant major booms and inaudible ass dialogue
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bibblex1 · 1 year ago
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#1 Introduction
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Hi my name is a Bibble, I am a femme enby 17 year old who lives in Australia but was born in New Zealand. My life overall isn't that interesting but I'd consider it relatable and very random which in some cases I think it's the simplest things in life that people should take notice of. I mean why does everyone have to blog about there fun and exhilarating vacations or there passionate fitness life? not saying that's every blog but it's those that seem to get very popular. I'm not what you'd consider super exciting but I do have a few things in my life going on such as recently I got a tongue piercing. It's been 5 days since I initially got it and overall it's not too painful I barely notice it really besides the fact I now have a horrible lisps. I do hate that, it's almost impossible to say anything without slurring on my words when I'm geeking out which truly sucks but this is only temporary. I could've had an infection by now or chipped my teeth horribly so I guess it's not the end of the world.
Anyways, l happen to make a few dumb decisions and have alot of thoughts and rambles like currently I haven't been going to school. I'm in my last senior year or Grade 12 and it's been hell. It really makes me consider whether I want to go on and do college at all. I mean I'm actually quiet smart but it's my inability to focus and actually get shit done that holds me back. Of course that's the case for most teenagers, it's not like I'm an outlier or anything and yet it's these next six months that will apparently decide my future. I don't like to let that get to me, schools not the most important thing. it's truly not the end of the world if I fail or even if I pass and do amazingly well, does it really matter? I say this and have to wonder if that's exactly what someone who is doing not so great would say and if I'm perhaps lying too myself but again I simply just don't care enough to give it any deeper thought. Highschool will come through and be over its not forever. I guess that's why I look towards the future opportunities and how my life will play out and how the decisions Ive made have led me to this point.
As I continue to ramble I remember back to what made me begin blogging in the first place. 'Solitaire' by Alice Oseman, finding out Tori Springs blogs made me feel some what comforted. I have always been partial to keeping a diary but I was never consistent enough to stay on track with it. I thought that a blog is essentially like a diary right? Maybe and maybe not but either way I like typing out my little word vomits for people to read about and put there own opinions on and even if this blog doesn't get that popular that's okay. Having a healthy outlet to clear your mind is always super important and as you could guess I'm not using a template or anything to format these blogs. Now to get a deeper look into who I am as a person. I enjoy music, art, video games and reading. I used to be super into anime and fandoms but I guess maturing has changed me. I'll never forget those points of my life but I'm alot happier now, but that's only due to the fact I've moved onto new obsessions. Lately I've been super into the game Monster Hunter World. Ive always been into the Monster Hunter franchise, ever since I had a 3DS Ive played the games. the release of MHW was mind blowing to me. Id never seen a Monster Hunter game so extravagant and lush with the amazing visuals and storyline. this was the first ever story game that got me truly invested and I remember spending hours and hours constantly playing and grinding. I'm not going to say it's an indie game or anything but it's not very active anymore, many people who play it are either extreme try hards or beginners speeding running with the defender set. No matter how you play though, the game will always be interesting, something about the way it fully immerses me is just so captivating. I find myself returning back to it at least every once and a month and it's times like those that make me happy. So much so I started to fall off the face of the earth for alittle bit, and yet I love it. I love those little moments in life where you truly have to do nothing. Maybe that's a bad mindset to have but I'm only human.
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craftymakerland · 3 months ago
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This is my new account after 2 years, I still have the stories from there, I just need to prove Reed them since it's been so long, my old account is "Luisa's Wife" poor choice of words, BUT it cought peoples attention which I'm going for, I hope you like it and lmk how it is!!! There will be more Chapters to come!!
( PART ONE!!!! )
Alexandra’s inferno
By: Tianna White
( Chapter 1 )
“ALEXANDRA!”
I heard my mother calling me from downstairs. I was just reading my book in peace, hoping not to deal with a person this early in the morning. I didn't really want to say anything but I went down anyway. To my surprise I saw nothing unusual. Just my father passed out drunk on the pool table and my mother on the lover seat with a box of cigarettes with only two left inside. They never really need me only if they want money or for me to make a quick stop to get something for them.
“What did you need?” I said in a slight rush.
I Just didn't want to be near her at the moment. She gave me a look up and down.
“You know you look like a man.” My mother said to me,
There was nothing I could do but just take in what she threw at me.
“A woman isn't supposed to grow a beard…your fucking hideouse.” My mom said with a glare.
“You're disgusting as a person, well your looks are what I hate most…You're really disappointing to look at.”
“Get out of my face.”
Just like that, I took it all in. Why did she always have to bother me when all she was gonna do was say such horrible things to me.I couldn't help that I was born with such conditions, but it's my fault. I left without hesitation and went back upstairs to my room, hoping that I wouldn't see them for the rest of the remaining day.
I made it to my room, closed the door quickly and locked it. I went to my bathroom, turned the light on and looked in the mirror. Maybe she was right, I was ugly as sin, the tooth gap, the beard and the afro of hair, I looked like a clown. I don't even know where I even got these genes from, but god forbid I start accusing my parents that they're not really mine. That would be another story that I would not like to get into.
I hated shaving my face, it was not normal for a woman to do as such. To speed up the process some, I just decided to grab the wax strip, bite on a cloth and start to strip the wax off. Besides, it wouldn't grow back as fast if I waxed it instead of shaving it. I counted to three and ripped it off as fast as I could, it was a horrible feeling. I hated it so much and to think that I have to do it six more times. When it came to the last strip I was already in tears. I really wanted someone to pull it for me but we all know that wasn’t gonna happen. So without hesitation I ripped it off and hurried to place my hand on the side of my face, biting the cloth even harder. It took me a little bit to recover but I managed to get up and clean up the mess. It was about time that I did something with my hair. I just threw it in a bonnet and left it as is.
I was more than ready to go to bed. Even though it was still early in the morning, I had blackout curtains so it didn’t matter to me. I just wanted to make it to the next day, then the day after that, and then the day after that. I really didn’t want to be here…
“Bibble…Bibble…BIBBLE!”
I snapped out of my train of thought and looked up.
“Who called my name?” I asked
“Baby are you okay? You’ve been deep in thought for the past hour.” She said worryingly
She didn’t know anything about my childhood and I plan to keep it that way until it is the right time. I really didn’t want to say anything to her but I had to say something. I was tired of answering questions of what I had on my mind. The thing is I wasn’t mad at her, I was just thinking the worst. I'm an overthinker, and it's not something to be proud of. I just got up from my seat and looked at her, trying to fix my facial expression.
“Don’t worry sweetheart, I’m okay, I've just been in my own little world lately.”
I could tell that she knew something was wrong, but I was trying to make it look like everything was fine. I didn’t want her to interrogate me for it.
I watched her come behind me and rest her head on my neck, wrapping her arms around my waist.
“You know that I'm always gonna worry about you, and if anything starts to become harder for you, I'll always be here for you.” She looked at me with a gentle smile and kissed me on the cheek.
With that, she left to go do her daily duties. I was left in the room in silence, I started to walk around the temple, trying to calm myself from my thoughts. While tracing my steps over and over again, I happened to come across a big portrait of me and my wife. I couldn't help but just stand there for a while and think to myself of how I made it this far, how I ended up with a happy life, how I managed to escape all the bad things in my life and how I became so big in life. Come to think of it, it took one little thing to make all this happen. Usually you would think such a tragic event would be a regrettable one, but looking at where it got me. I've never been so happy to make such a decision.
I took another good look at the portrait and walked off. Keeping a smile on my face, I went past my wife's personal assistant, her name was Debrah I'm pretty sure. She was nice and not to mention has known her many years before I did. She was kinda like her kid. They had more of a daughter and mother kind of relationship. I didn't know too much about Debra, but Tempora always talks about her to me from time to time. What I do know is that Debra lost her mom at a very young age due to a huge unnecessary war between her parents and the W.S.B clan. She watched her mother be beheaded by the everlasting sword of life. Her mother was Lucifer's wife, so this wasn't just any sword that was able to kill her, they were on the hunt for it before even starting the war. Now we have it in me and Temporas possession, held in a very private place in the temple where only me and her can have access to it and there's at least thirty guards guarding it. From time to time me or her would go down there and see if it had been tampered with or not. God forbids that someone would make their way into the room without catching the guards attention. Even though the room is fully secure. The people around this area can be quite questionable and I like to keep my eye out for things like this.
Speaking of, I don’t think that either one of us has done our daily check on it. I went to the main hall to see if Tempora was there and I was right, she was sitting on her throne and looking over some papers that I didn’t finish a while ago. I went next to her and placed my hand on her shoulder.
“Hey, when was the last time that you checked the chambers?” I spoke out of curiosity.
Looking at her papers, she slowly put the down to remember the last time thats shes
Checked them.
“I don’t think that I checked them today at all.”
“Gotcha, I wanted to check and see if you did before I went to look for myself.”
“You do know that there are over a dozen guards protecting it right?” She looks at me.
“ I know, but you know how people are here, and the last thing I need is for someone to get a hold of it.”
“I guess you're right, by all means you can check it.” she gave me a smile while looking back at her papers.
“Besides, it hasn't been touched in over twenty-five thousand years, so there's one in a million chances that someone will take it.”
“I know, and in all that time I've still checked it, making sure that it didn't get tempered with.” I gave her a slight smirk.
“You're so lucky I love you dearly.”
“I'm more than lucky.” I moved my hand under her chin and pulled it gently towards me and kissed her on the lips.
“If I were you I would hurry up and check.” she said after parting from the kiss.
I gave her a smile back and started to walk away. I was gonna make this trip to the chambers as fast as possible.
Making my way down the hall, into the kitchen and through the trap doors underneath the cart, there was a set of stairs that would lead you into another hallway. All you had to do was keep going straight and take a couple of turns then you see four guards in front of the doors. They let me pass, and as soon as you go through those doors you have to keep going into a labyrinth maze. I don't need to make myself go through when I could easily walk through them, but you are only able to walk through if you live in the temple as one of the gods. After the maze you would go through another set of doors that contained all of the remaining guards, positioned to attack when threatened or if you're not supposed to be down there. When they saw me, immediately they straightened up.
“Has anyone else been down here besides me.” I gave the main guard a death stare.
“ No, your majesty, no one but you has been down here.” the guard replied.
I looked at them with one more glare to try and sense if they were lying or not.
“Very well, please open the door.”
“Yes, your majesty.”
The guards opened the door, allowing me to pass through. Everything seemed like nothing was wrong. Nothing was tampered with and everything was in place. With that I left the room and let the guards go back to what they were supposed to do.
I finally made my way back up and I intensely remember why I hurried to get back up here. I made my way into the main hall to see if she was on her throne still, to my surprise she was. I walked over to her. She looked like she was really into what she was doing.
“Hey baby, how's the papers going?”
“Oh hi, yeah no, im almost done with making the next meeting with apollo.”
“I see no point in even having one with him.”
“Yeah I know, but I still have to put a reminder out, cuz if I didn't and he actually decides to show up, Zeus would never let me hear the end of it.”
“I guess you do have a point, but he never shows up-”
“Could you both shut up, I've been hearing yall yap all day PLEASE shut up!”
She has a mouth on her neck, one in the middle of her chest, one on each breast and a huge one on her stomach. The one on her stomach is the one that has a huge problem with us talking, they all have a mind of their own but the one on her stomach has a smart mouth and no matter what someone says. It gets annoyed very easily.
“You know what I'm really getting tired of you, you are more than lucky that you're attached to my wife or I would rip you out from the skin.” I threatened
'WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE MOUTH IS LUCKY, I'M THE LUCKY ONE.” Tempora interrupted.
“Yeah that's what I said.” I replied
“Well im stopping this right now haha, I do NOT want to hear you both fight again, and you know how weird that looks? You are arguing with my stomach.”
“Fair enough, and if it says anything here in a few minutes I will cover it with a piece of cloth.” I looked at her with a smirk.
“You know, they feel whatever I feel.” She looked at me as she got up from her throne using her spider-like legs to lift herself up. She grabbed me by the waist and got inches closer to my face.
“You are just so pretty.”
Lifting her hand and placing it on the side of my face, I was gonna kiss her once again. It always sounds like a new experience, considering that we have been married for over thirty thousand years, but being a god gets really busy. So I cherish every moment that I spend with her. I placed my hand on her cheek looking directly into her eyes and my lips touched hers once again. There was nothing that could ruin this moment, nothing…
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wtf-tfw · 5 months ago
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THE BIBBLE PART 1
On the first day, God made zest. From that zest he was able to bless. From those bless he did his best to create the chest of the best of the best. And on the second day, God decided to stop rhyming because he wasn't very good at that. From there his productivity skyrocketed, what with all the free time generated from not having to come up with rhymes, his sister was right, it was a stupud gimmick anyways. Next he invented the tree, the bouncy ball, flowers and rabbits, cookies and cream, eggs and telephones, unmanned machine guns, rapid growth boyfriend capsules, and classical music. His army of little gay sky babies worked day in and day out to fabricate the Things for the world. It was God's world and he was going to decorate it however he wanted. On the third day, God had hot girl artist burnout and was like "UGHHHH I really already exhausted all my best ideas this suckkssss" so he phoned his sister and she said "Well why don't you make people?"
"People?" God said.
"Yeah, you know, people! Three legs, little genital things, weird skin, all 'bleaghh i have to go to work!' and all that" said God's sister.
And God thanked his sister for the idea and hung up, only to shortly thereafter roll his eyes because three legs?? What was she thinking, that was clearly overkill. But he got to work anyways cauze his sister was prety cool overall she knew what she was talking about.
---
in the GARDEN of PEEDEN,
Peeve, the woman-type and Tinkle-Adam the man-bug. They explored the GARDEN and found it to be full of swag. They said "I love this- thanks God, its just like America should be: one man and one woman!"
God tutted at this and set down his shrimp poke bowl. Why were they already being weird little conservatives instead of freaking that shit nasty style. Its like he got this party goin for nothign?! And he begged and begged for them to eat the fruit of the Freak Tree so that theyd eat the Freak Fruit and become nasty little freaks who like sloppy style makeouts and smoking clove cigarettes in caves but they were always like "No. No God, we aren't into that kind of thing" And God was so disappointed. So he called his sister and she was like "You have to assert your dominance man, you can't let those little tightasses control you okay. Let them know who's boss." And God said okay.
Peeve shouted and cried as God took her rib from her. Tinkle-Adam screeched in pain as a testicle was taken from him (now he only had two) Using the rib and the testicle, God made the third Human, Gobbler. Gobbler was going to fix everything, so the punishment of pain and the blessing of Gobbler was really a two in one. Gobbler was a nasty little freak who liked beer and humping things and God thought he was Awesome with a capital A.
Gobbler was releaseed into the Garden of Peeden. And immediately he was like "OH this is the releast, Bruv!" (He called God 'Bruv' because he was made that way) Gobbler taught Tinkle-Adam the joys of beef-eating and Peeve the joys of rump-roasting. The three enjoyed a number of beef-related hobbies together. Take that as you will.
But one day, the Regular Devil from a book known as the Bible became real in the world and said "No, no no! You are doing this so very wrong! You are raising a bunch of imbecilic hoodlums! Stop this nonsense immediately!" And the Regular Devil blasted the creatures with Shame and suddenly they all became aware of their weird penises.
God used his Authority though, and shooed the Regular Devil out of his work of fiction. What a prick! But it was too late, the humans had already noticed their weird penises and they no longer could enjoy the beautiful snails and shrimps and sailboats and mosquitoes and acoustic guitars and bonfires and magic erasers and tattoo parlors and hamburger patties of the Garden of Peeden anymore. They were just too ashamed of their weird penises.
And God was like "I'm--I'm so sorry about that you guys. Tinkle-Adam, Peeve, Gobbler, are you guys like...good?" And Tinkle-Adam scratched his neck and looked to the side. Peeve wouldn't make eye contact with him anymore. These two were back to their old stick-up-their-ass-but-not-in-the-fun-way ways again. "S-Surely not you too, Gobbler!" But Gobbler did not look at God. He simply looked at his weird penis. He sat down, and was absorbed into the Earth, never to be seen again.
It was so over. It was so astronomically over. God's sister wasn't answering his calls. He was so fucked, dude. Peeve made the big decision to leave the Garden of Peeden, and Tinkle-Adam followed with her. Hoping that maybe the rest of the crazy world God had created would help to reunite that spark of joy they had time with Gobbler in the Garden.
Eventually they found it in themselves to get freaky again a couple more times....but that's a story for part TWO!
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macwantspeace · 8 months ago
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mixed image - what's her face, ron filipkowski on xitter, posted on reddit/whitepeopletwitter The setup: "Truth is not truth" - Rudy The punchline: "Science is not science" - Empty Greene I guess the joke is that the almighty god figured billions of years ago that all y'all would be fuckups on April 8 so he sends signs and portents. This could have been an email !! [anyway it's going to be cloudy, then rain. I'm so confused.] Just for giggles, here's the bibble: "54 He said to the crowd: “When you see a cloud rising in the west, immediately you say, ‘It’s going to rain,’ and it does. 55 And when the south wind blows, you say, ‘It’s going to be hot,’ and it is. 56 Hypocrites! You know how to interpret the appearance of the earth and the sky. How is it that you don’t know how to interpret this present time?" I think what we have here is a metafour. Luke could have mentioned pouring water into a cup, then said you know how to pour water into a cup. That does not mean that every time water pours into a cup that it indicates evil in the world. [I got eclipse glasses made in china and I doubt they are legit. It's all Marge's fault.]
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