#Anon you're very valid lmao

[knifearo]

got first "you're not special for not fucking people" anon hate on this blog!!!!! congrats everyone we have made it to the scope of people who have nothing better to do than [ checks notes ] send hatemail to people who are literally not doing anything. HUGE achievement aspecs i'm so proud of you all <33333333

[goldenpinof]

@ anons about Phil and next tour: i'm not airing that, at least now

[lottieurl]

PLEASE do share your thoughts on Jackie's parents 👀

THANK YOU for the encouragement. this might get long

let's start with how a while ago i got an anon implying that jackie was pampered by her parents BASED on the scene with adult shauna and them on jackie's birthday. which was the first time it ever occurred to me that people watched that scene and saw something completely different from what i saw. absolutely incomprehensible TO ME to even imagine that because i remember watching it for the first time and thinking that jackie's parents are straight out of a horror movie. there is something so sinister about how they treat shauna all while essentially replacing jackie WITH shauna. shauna gets jackie's gift and i believe (although i'd have to rewach the scene to make sure) shauna blows the candles on JACKIE'S cake and shauna is there with jackie's high school boyfriend. jackie's mother went to her wedding!! the show is not subtle about them putting shauna in the role of the daughter they lost. so why treat her so horribly? when they have no reason to because they don't know she was sleeping with jeff before plane crash before it's revealed to them in that very scene

so what that tells me and how i interpret it is: that's how they were treating jackie when she was alive. there is this insidious sort of cruelty that's masked by fake kindness? but constantly puts you down in ways that's hard to shake off. and jackie was probably Never good enough no matter how much she tried. she only became the Perfect Daughter after death when they could start treating shauna the way they treated jackie. like WHY is jackie such a deeply deeply insecure character? why does she crave validation sooooo bad? and we know she doesn't have a good relationship with her parents from how she talks about her mother when she gives shauna the pills on the plane (and implies her parents are neglectful) and when she says she has curfew and it's very much implied her parents would react badly vs shauna saying she has curfew too but being so unbothered by it she finds time to fuck jeff on her way home lmao. and to me people who fail to notice that are fooled by the appearances. jackie's parents have money and a big house and AFTER JACKIE IS DEAD idealize her. but what they seem not to notice is that the purpose of talking about how perfect jackie was is to belittle shauna. this isn't grieving parents who miss their daughter to me

and now actually let's talk about how i think that interpretation influences jackie as a character. we see how in moments of insecurity she does say things that are... i suppose a mix of self centered and not INTENTIONALLY mean but still hurtful to shauna. but she does usually backtrack and says sorry and her (many many MANY) moments of kindness always come off as genuine to me like she's starved for approval, she craves being loved. i think she keeps coming back to jeff just because even tho she doesn't want HIM she wants to be wanted and wants to be seen as someone who's wanted. but so much of her kindness sometimes feels. how do i put it. anxious? and so i imagine how living with her parents was for her. you're a kid and your parents keep finding ways to belittle you and to shame you but in ways that aren't very obvious especially to a child. you're a kid! you want their approval! so you learn HOW to be and HOW to act to maybe get it. if i am sweet and compliment them and i become the perfect daughter maybe they'll love me. and then you start applying that behavior to all your relationships and you're not even self aware about it. you're a teenager and you're trying so hard

[yayll]

https://www.tumblr.com/yayll/759326311116308480/havent-slept-yet-but-just-as-i-was-about-to?source=share

Hi, this anon again😅 haven't slept yet again...it's 6 am🙃. I just love the idea that Dazai with all his godlike intelligence is the kind of guy to see immediately what troubles or struggles his significant other has with themselves or in general.

If you have trauma he will immediately catch on, self esteem issues? Immediately caught on, mommy or daddy issues? People pleaser? He knows it, and many other things, he will immediately figure it out as you both date.

He'll probably even do little things that you'd think he doesn't understand how much it means to you, like validating you, making sure you always have a specific comfort of yours at hand, you'd think he just does it because he saw that you liked it, but it was because he knew what it would do for you, what it makes you feel.

Dazai sees you and he doesn't just see your traumas and things you struggle with of course, he first sees someone he loves unconditionally. Dazai knows you love him with all your heart especially after knowing about his past.

Dazai will tell if you're sensitive, if you're uncomfortable with loud noises, if you get emotional about a lot of things, if you're lonely around people, if you're masking your real personality around other people, if you've only heard criticism instead of any praise, if you've been undermined and seen as a second choice, Dazai will know.

And he will show you from the moment he picks up on everything, that you're never gonna feel like that again as long as he's there, and he will always be there. He will validate everything you always wanted to be validated. Dazai from the Port to ADA is very much "gun is love, gun is life" to "what is gun, what is this metal thing that can hurt another human being!?" An exaggeration of course but that's how he probably would be even though he's joking, but the second someone tried to mess with you, suddenly every training he had in the Port comes back and he's immediately shown to be this incredibly intimidating and ruthless man to anyone who tries hurt you.

Have a beautiful forever Hun💖🥺 I know you said in the last message you've had a rough time and I genuinely hope you're doing better 🥺💖 a reminder that you're so amazing and you deserve the best, you deserve to be happy and i wish you the uttermost happiness and love and good health, you're still so incredibly young, you have so much time to accomplish everything or anything you want, you're doing well, get some sun, hydrate yourself, sleep the best you can(because I know sometimes we don't always get enough sleep) and eat well💖🥺

I'll leave these emojis for now so you'll know it's me next time😅

- 🥺💖

HELLOOOOO my sweet 🥹💖

i'm so sorry i have such a late reply! i've been working on some writing and also quite literally irl so i'm just trying to catch up. you are amazing and i'm wishing u the best of health and happiness right back :') love is all we rlly have in this world. things are a lot better lately on my end and i hope you've been able to sleep comfortably even if it takes u a while! MWAH.

and also. i just rlly wanted to indulge those lil things you said about dazai because they are sooooooooo true. sooooo fucking valid. GUN IS LOVE GUN IS LIFE TOOK ME OUTTTT LMAO i actually love the way u talk abt dazai's highly intuitive side, it's quite literally what makes him so compelling as is. and in a relationship/partnership? oh it's a goddamn dream. he's like a hawk watching and registering your every mood fluctuation and the cause of it, tryinf to see how he can rectify it immediately. and i also FIRMLY believe he will use any and all past PM training to facilitate ur happiness should he ever need to. he'll be like:

"Hey, take five. You've been at it for hours now and frankly, it's boring watching you work."

"I can't, I'm so behind on reports and I'm helping out with the agency holiday party, I also need to-"

Dazai's eyes narrow, and shakes his head rapidly. Mission accepted, he thinks. He knows what you need, and if you won't cater to your needs, he'll have to just do it himself. He lives to see you at ease, because you deserve the entire world. You will not, under any circumstances, be stressed under his watchful eye... And he also just really wants an excuse to cuddle later without having to hear about dumb things like work. It's a win-win, and you don't have a choice! He sighs, and puts on his little performance.

".. You expect me, the great Osamu Dazai, to simply watch as I witness my favorite detective work themself to the bone?! Absolutely not! I refuse. Come, we're going to the cafe downstairs."

You groan as he pulls you, smiling in reluctance.

"Dazaiiii, i'm serious.. plus, don't you have like, a huge running tab there?"

He flashes you a sly smirk and a wink.

"That's why I have you, silly! Your philanthropic and generous heart is willing to treat me as your penance for being so stubborn. How noble of you. You really shouldn't have."

You roll your eyes, sighing deeply as you zoom out of the agency with him.

"The waitress there wants to kill you, you know."

You mutter under your breath with a playful smile. Dazai gasps dramatically and looks back at you, still holding you by the arm, tighening just a smidge.

"Oh, goodness! I'm quaking. well thank god i'm bringing you, my precious little scapegoat~"

Despite your feigned annoyance, your cheeks redden, and it's hard not to become endeared with how relentless he is in his pursuits to distract you. what a slack off, you want to kiss his stupid face until he shuts up. You might just have to.

"You're the worst, Dazai."

"Mm, what a weird way to say 'I love you.' I'll take it."

this is a silly little thing, but basically overly observant and on the case Dazai he just NEEDS to make you the happiest whether you like it or not!

i love u, mwah :')

-ivy

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

heya!

i'm asexual(afaik, always doubting and debating, as i do) but i get horny, especially at some points in my menstrual cycle. sometimes i find masturbation satisfying, especially before my period, but more often i find it to be uncomfortable and not a solution to being horny, and i find the feeling of being horny itself to be uncomfortable.

i've been considering trying sex toys or something as a solution to the horny issue, but as most of them are an investment and i dont know if they would be a solution (dont know if it would work any better than my own fingers at relieving the issue)

any advice? totally valid if you only have "suffer through" as a solution lmao, i just hate the feeling of being physically aroused.(again, most of the time.)

thank you very much!

hi anon,

if you're interested in a low-investment foray into sex toys, I'd recommend my go-to starter toy: the GAIA Eco Bullet. cheap, cute, and biodegradable!

other than that, I'm afraid there's not much advice I can give. "suffer through" is in fact what the vast majority of people have to do about being horny at least some of the time; very few people have the luxury of being able to drop everything and go masturbate or have sex at the drop of a hat. horny isn't exactly meant to be a comfortable sensation; much like hunger, it's there to signal a desire, with the pleasure coming from seeing that desire fulfilled. and much unlike hunger, nothing bad will actually happen to you if you don't nut, so it's possible to just power through without ever having to do a dang thing about it if you don't want to.

[tujhse-raabta]

hope you're doing well <3

saw your post abt atlantis!percy and I got excited abt it

not anon but I wanna know more abt how amphitrite interacts w/ little percy in this au

doing VERY well, wby???? and OH ILY FOR THIS OK OK OK SO

when Poseidon brings Sally and Percy to Atlantis, she is. furious. fucking furious. you DARE to cheat on me in our open relationship, where you COULD have communicated but didn't, and then 'you bring your bastard whelp and your whore to my home?' this is a quote, forgive me 😭😭

and Sally steps up. yada yada hate me if you want, I deserve it, but Percy didn't ask to be born, and if you call my child one more name I will cut off your tongue before I'm executed for my actions.

(their situation is complex. i will not have anyone bash ANY of them. yes, there's gonna be conflict. yes, it's a horrible situation with nuanced people and faults. but they're gonna work through it.)

amphitrite just sneers and walks away, though she does call off triton - who looks FURIOUS - from hurting them.

she's actually the last person to get used to percy and Sally being around from the royal family, which is VALID.

it comes to a head when there's an 'attack' and Percy MIGHT have been hurt, and there is NO ONE WHO RUNS FASTER THAN HER TO HIS ROOM. TO PROTECT THIS CHILD. FROM HER OWN CHILD. when she realises this, that she's grown fond of the kid in the threeish months (and more than fond of his mother) she consciously gives them both a chance. and then PERCY GETS A NEW MAMA!!!!!!!

yeah he calls her mama, Sally mom, Poseidon dad and triton twi. Triton is included bcs TRITON. THAT GOD IS LESS A BROTHER AND MORE ANOTHER DAD. he never stops calling him twi btw, even once the lisp goes

SORRY BACK TO TOPIC AMPHI AND PERCY

SHE'S the one who works hardest to integrate percy into the political scenario of atlantis. she's the one who plays the court, and the citizens, to come to accept percy and, gods, she makes him BELOVED. she knows how much danger her kid is in, so she ENSURES that the entirety of the sea would go to war for him.

percy never, ever thinks of her as anything less than a mother. ever. he is hers as he is Sally's, as he is Poseidon's.

she's also the rational one in his family. Poseidon, Sally, triton, they're all irrational in their care for him - understandably - that they never see him as more than a defenseless baby who needs protection. she helps percy discover who he is outside of atlantis' gates and guards, and she trusts him and his capability. she's the first to do that, and that means so much to twelve year old percy. that there's someone out there who isn't just freaking out over him (she's doing that too lmao) but TRUSTS that he has the ability to do his quest well. self esteem boost!

[purpurussy]

I feel like the "dan is bi" anon is trolling but just in case they're genuinely confused: yes dan said in BIG that he loved and felt attracted to his high school gf (although he also made it pretty clear that they did not have sex so idk where anon is getting the idea that he has slept with "multiple women" 💀), and he alluded to his attraction not being confined to a specific gender in the part where he talked about labels, but you're completely taking all of that wildly out of context and missing the point of the whole video by calling him bi. I feel like this is probably the part that's frying their brain:

(shoutout to the legend @goldenpinof for this transcript!)

But firstly, imo it was very clear from BIG, as well as other stuff he's said over the years, that he just doesn't like labels. Which I find very valid, it took me a long time to figure out how to label myself. I still don't know what my gender is lmao but I started saying "bi" for my sexuality because it's a widely-used term that gets the point across. And I think that's the thing here: he came to the conclusion that the labels "gay" and "queer" are the best descriptors of his identity, which do the most accurate job of approximating something extremely psychologically complex and multilayered and nuanced in a simple everyday term that gets the point across to other people.

Obviously words mean things and it doesn't make sense to just pick a label at random (like for example it wouldn't make sense for me to identify as a lesbian, since I definitely feel attraction to men as well as women and everything outside the binary, and am interested in acting on that attraction at times, so I wouldn't be conveying accurate information to other people if I used the label lesbian for myself) but a label is just supposed to serve the task of conveying relevant information to other people (if a lesbian feels some kind of abstract attraction to dan and phil, that doesn't mean that the alphabet council needs to immediately revoke their lesbian card!! Since the word "lesbian" still does a perfectly good job of conveying relevant information to other people. Likewise if a straight dude has a fun little gay dalliance with his college roommate, but has absolutely 0 interest in men beyond that incident, it wouldn't be remotely necessary for him to start calling himself bi if he didn't want to, because what would be the point in that if he's only interested in women? Like if he told a gay dude who found him attractive that he's bi, only to backtrack... Do you see what I'm saying here?). It's perfectly valid for Dan to use "gay" and "queer" as umbrella terms that in his opinion do the best job of describing him, out of the language that's available. If he's like essentially a kinsey >5 and decided to just round it off to a 6 at this point, who are you to tell him he can't lmao

(shoutout to the legend @goldenpinof for this transcript!

Human sexuality is often way too complicated to boil it down to a single label in a way that doesn't erase any of its nuance, and I feel like this is something he's struggled with in the past, especially with him being a public figure. He's mentioned multiple times that feeling like he had to choose a label was a factor that prolonged his decision to come out.

And this is not even getting into the impact that his trauma from his childhood and also from spending a chunk of his formative years in the public eye probably had on the way he identifies or the way he chooses to label himself. It clearly took so much courage and strength for him to finally be able to call himself gay/queer please have some respect for our brave troops

Ultimately the point is that he uses the labels "gay" and "queer", not "bi", and it really shouldn't be difficult to respect that. It's also not biphobic for him to choose not use the label "bi" (again speaking as someone who uses that label). It's just that he feels "gay"/"queer" are better descriptors for him and nobody gets to determine that except him!! :) He wants people to know he's gay so he calls himself gay and that's that on that.

There are definitely people on here who are way smarter and more well-educated than me who would've done a much better job eloquently discussing this topic without rambling all over the place but that's my take (if anyone would like to add to this please do so, I'm always open to learn more about topics like this. And I'm also not saying that the way I see it is the only objectively correct opinion, but anon is definitely wrong so 💀). Thank you for coming to my ted talk

[atopvisenyashill]

aegon executing essie and sylvenna is worse than anything rhaenyra has done.

im joking but im also not. that part made me ridiculously upset, even after all the atrocities that happened during the dance and you're one of the 5 people who might understand lmao.

aksjd YOU’RE VALID ANON!!

The young monarch, who had celebrated his fifth nameday only two days previous, was carried back to the Red Keep slung over the back of a horse, chained and weeping. His mother walked behind him, clutching the hand of the Dornishwoman Sylvenna Sand…

His mother, Essie, who had presumed to style herself Lady Esselyn during her son's brief reign, confessed under torture that Gaemon's father was not the king, as she had previously claimed, but rather a silver-haired oarsman off a trading galley from Lys. Being lowborn and unworthy of the sword, Essie and the Dornish whore Sylvenna Sand were hanged from the battlements of the Red Keep, together…

It’s just as bad as Blood & Cheese for me because the cruelty here is the point, just like B&C. Chaining a sobbing five year old up to death march him and his moms to be tortured, and then hanging them instead of beheading them because they’re “unworthy” of the sword so they get a slow death choking to death in front of each other. It’s meant to bring them low, to put them in their place, to build a wall between Essie & Sylvie and the noble class. It’s unsettling I think in part because of the focus on the trio as a family unit, and the “queerness” of it. We get several comments in TWOIAF and F&B bringing focus to how weird they are, how radical, and to have that little spark so brutally snuffed out. It really hurts!!

It’s a wildly unnecessary move too - I whack Jaehaerys constantly but when given the choice to take revenge or heal the kingdom after maegor’s reign, he explicitly chooses healing! he only executes those who tortured his brother, tyanna, and the kingsguard who refused to take the black! he very specifically reconciles with the faith & the warrior’s son by asking them to join him because their crime was attempting to take power in a power vacuum left by the failings of the crown. that’s exactly what sylvie & essie do! but aegon retakes the capital and refuses to heal the damage he and rhaenyra did - instead he makes it worse, turning the violence that had been used on him onto the people who stepped up where he failed AND all this after it was the greens who initially started locking the population of KL into the city like cattle to a slaughter. No way out, no king or queen around, and no blood on Sylvie or Essie’s hands but it doesn’t matter; because they’re lowborn, they deserve to die. To choke to death in front of each other, their weeping wailing son ripped away and made to serve the family who murdered his mothers. To remind him always that he is worth less, that his mothers are lower than shit in the sewer. Unendingly tragic, and so completely avoidable, but again - the evil of it is the reason it’s done.

[lesbiancolumbo]

I do wanna hear ur Phil Marlowe opinions lay them on me (also I was the anon who asked for recs on lady detective noir films and they’ve rocked - blue gardenia has been my fave so far)

this is so validating..... like five of you all messaged me at once for it. very well. here we go. my marlowe opinions, in no real order:

i don't like the big sleep adaptation (the 40s one, haven't bothered with the mitchum ones). it's an almost impossible book to adapt in the era they adapted it, which results in a completely incomprehensible storyline due to Censorship, and i get part of the noir appeal is "it doesn't make sense!!!" sure ok but there's a difference in the studio like removing a couple pages from a story to keep it at length (out of the past the most famous example of this) but what they did to the big sleep like rendered it fundamentally a nothing burger. every other noir that got tampered with in this way still has the crux of its story! like what even are we doing here. and can i be even more honest. it REEKS of "we had a mega-hit with bogie and bacall and hawks and now bogie and bacall are in love and we must capitalize on this and let's reunite them with hawks and this is conveniently just whatever he's doing next, have it done in 3 months so we can release it as soon after to have and have not as we can". like, it feels incomprehensible and RUSHED. bogart is basically doing sam spade again. #NotMyMarlowe

my favorite marlowe performance is dick powell (even though his movie is like. good but not Great) because he understands his assignment, and there's an interesting subtext to him as a matinee musical idol turned postwar noirguy that i think translates well to his performance. he FEELS so rugged and lived in in a way i don't get from bogie.

the long goodbye is trash altman is trash i hate elliott gould i want it gone i hate it all that's my favorite of the books and they openly just didn't even try to respect it when adapting it

my most controversial opinion........... i love lady in the lake lmao. now is it the best adaptation of the book? no, they change a lot. but the gimmick kind of rules, i love audrey totter, and montgomery isn't my favorite marlowe but i like him better than bogie lol.

editing this post bc i remembered another one. one of the books that didn't get adapted that i enjoyed is the high window. let's go back in time and make that fucking movie with dick powell.

anyway people love cranking it to the big sleep and the long goodbye and like whatever, you live your life. but those movies really do not do it for me and i just needed to voice that.

MOST IMPORTANTLY. i'm so thrilled you're loving those recs! blue gardenia is great, i love 'em all, pop by anytime you wanna talk lady detective!

[tizeline]

I want sep au raph and cass to kiss ngl

i am very normal abt raphcass(lie)

LMAO you're valid for that, Anon XD But you should know, I'm a Capril shipper first and foremost, so if Casey would get with anyone in the AU it'd be April, but you still free to ship it of course!

[bravo4iscool]

girl, I’m not gonna lie to you, I have some free time, and sometimes I really like to use it uselessly. and I found your ig account, then I did some other research and I found a lot about you and your family, so I could really rate you. And yes, I can say properly: you’re ugly.

now, you're kinda right, I give you that. some fit guys do like fat women, maybe one guy out of ten. but these are REALLY PRETTY WOMEN, 'cause I don’t deny that there are beautiful fat women, but they are usually rare, and that’s definitely not you.

I’m not seeking validation wtfff has nothing to do with anything, girl… you seem stupid. I just really found your behavior hilarious. like, how the false illusion of the new age got you, making you really believe in fairy tales. I mean, you're clearly so insecure, trying to pass as “I’m fine with my weight” while really trying to convince yourself that you’re desirable. and like, you’re not 😭 and it’s so fun when you talk about validation, because, you see, I may be petty or bitter or mean, or whatever it is. but, if you really felt confident, pretty, and good about yourself, you would just turn off the anon or ignore me. but no, you’re here, writing answers so you can post and be consoled. that’s how I know you feel pathetic and horrible about yourself, and need these other weirdos to help you fool yourself. you can ignore me, or reply me, it won’t make difference. you too fucking transparent, so easy to read.

or you wouldn’t be doing headcanons of really fit men attracted to you, because if you were desirable and if you really felt that way, you would just know, and not try to reaffirm yourself along with other equally UGLY FAT GIRLS. the main thing here is how out of touch you are with reality. close the tumblr, go to a nice spot in your town, where you KNOW there are hot guys, and please record yourself being chosen by them. if you're so sure of yourself. and open your instagram account, since you have nothing to hide and being ashamed. I mean, you’re pretty right? lol

y’know i’m not doing this cuz i’m insecure💀 also, i never said those hc’s were about me LMAO. i’m very aware that he and every other cod character is fucking fictional💀. this is just my hobby😗✌🏼.

also, why are you so keen about finding out about my personal life? wtf do i have to do with you? it’s fucking creepy to stalk my ig and all that💀. who tf do you think you are?

the only one being pathetic here is you, because you’re out here insulting me via anon haha. at least grow the balls to confront me correctly lol.

but yk, your stupidity and insecurity is pretty hard to ignore. you can have your opinion about me but let me be. i didn’t ask you for it lmao. also, i couldn’t care less about your opinion. you can think i’m ugly, idgaf, but stop annoying me with it.

and idk if you know but talking down on other people has to do with one’s insecurities, so maybe you’re the insecure one here😘.

and yes, i’m fine with my weight. i’ve come to terms with it, since i can’t change it without a medical intervention. is it so hard to believe that someone overweight actually accepts that fact or what? it says that says a lot about you actually.

also, i’m posting this so people can see that there are, unfortunately, still people with the iq of a fucking brick out there. i couldn’t care less about what they tell me. as i said, i’m perfectly fine on my own.

i’m actually laughing writing this because i won’t ignore you. people like you should rethink their life choices ngl.

you’re going crazy over a tumblr post and start to insult me as fat and ugly and you started to fucking stalk me. you’re being the prime example for insecurity rn💀.

your messages can get as long as you want them to be, i will respond to them because it’s sad people still think like you.

there are people out there saying all things about cod or ghost or whoever. if i don’t like them, i scroll, but i don’t start insulting and stalking the author of that post/headcanon/fic or whatever.

grow tf up and get a helmet💀.

[thaenad]

Hey. I love your work so much on your other blog (and have even sent anons there) but since this one is more feedism-related than fat lib related I figured I’d send it here, I hope that’s okay.

Do you have any recommendations for people with this kink who are so deeply ashamed by it that they haven’t been able to tell anyone about it their entire lives? I’m alloace and never had a partner partially because the only sense of sexuality I have is this kink and I have always felt like that makes it almost impossible to truly connect with a partner without knowing 100% they’re into it beforehand. And yet, I have so much social anxiety that I hardly meet people period and given the shame surrounding this kink I kind of assume anyone who I’d really click with would never tell me they were also interested in this and wanted me to feed them unless we’re already in a relationship. I can’t even be open and honest with friends about it because I’m terrified of their judgement especially because I AM so pro-fat lib and have been so vocally around them and I dunno. U saw all those anons u got lol.

I dunno I’ve just resigned myself to never having that kind of intimacy but it’s hard sometimes when I know deep down that it’s what I want. Do you have any recommendations for what I can do to start being more open and honest about my sexuality and hopefully feel a lot less ashamed? (For the record I am very sex-positive, for everyone but me if that makes sense. Lmao.)

Hey there anon, it's absolutely okay! I'd love to have more of these conversations with fellow feedists on this blog, especially since it's a much safer space for all of us.

Oof. I just wanna reach through the screen and give you a great big hug. I can completely relate to what you're going through right now (also as an alloace). I struggled with the exact same fears before coming out to anyone 5-ish years ago. It's so hard to feel like you have to hide or deny such a big part of who you are, and I hope you're doing okay. Just sending me this ask is a great step towards self acceptance, because connecting with other people who get it can help so much. If you need to talk, my inbox and dms are always open. ❤️

I will say the most monumental step for me was talking about it out loud with someone. Although the shame may cause paranoia, I promise that you can tell your best friend and they will still love you. Yes, the backlash from fat libbers on the internet is scary, but they don't know us, we're just a concept to them. The people who know you already know that you are not a predator. The people who know you know your intentions are good, they love you, and they want to support you. If they listen to you with compassion when you express yourself other times, they will listen with compassion when you talk about this.

The fact that you are passionate about fat liberation means you have already crossed the biggest obstacle when it comes to self acceptance for feedists: knowing that there is nothing wrong with fatness. Most people take their entire lives to discover that fact (or never do), and you are already there. And from what it sounds like, you are surrounding yourself with fat positive friends. That's huge. Take a minute to celebrate yourself for that.

If you decide to open up about being a feedist to anyone, be selective. Fat positive people are safer because they already understand the basics. They already know you're passionate about fat lib, being a feedist won't negate that, it will make sense. Most people actually have no idea what feedism is, so you might have the chance to explain it for the first time in a way that is positive, and that can be incredibly validating and empowering.

The person you share this with will know how hard it is for you. The first time I opened up to my best friend about it, I wept on her shoulder. Nothing changed between us except I felt seen and supported, and now she sends me posts with food and teases me about fat guys, and we laugh about it, like she would with any friend. It's made me feel so much more close to normal.

If that feels impossible right now, that's okay. Keep talking to feedists online, keep seeking community. I had to make friendships with feedists years before I could even imagine telling my own friends. The more normal you feel, the less scarier it gets.

It can be really, really hard. I ended up seeking therapy because I was struggling so much with shame. I knew I needed it, but for years I put it off because I didn't know if I could trust a therapist, I thought they might diagnose me with a sexual disorder and try to give me conversion therapy! Needless to say, that was the shame talking. Fear can cause our minds to heighten things out of proportion. It also took years of conversations out loud with a friend or two to finally be able to talk about it in a therapy setting. This shit takes time. After I discovered fat liberation, flung myself into the research and dissolved some of my own fatphobia (the BIGGEST step of all!) I ended up searching for a fat-positive, kink-conscious therapist, and guess what? They exist! They are 100% sex positive, understand the principle of bodily autonomy and that health does not determine a person's worth, and will remind you of those things over and over. I still see my therapist, they've always been in my corner cheering me on. They've helped me through the shame and fear, and they've helped me navigate my sexual & romantic relationships as a feedist. It's one of the best decisions I have ever made for myself.

Here's a post I made on how to find feedist-friendly therapists.

"I have always felt like that makes it almost impossible to truly connect with a partner without knowing 100% they’re into it beforehand."

I feel the exact same way. It was so isolating and horrifying before I realized that I don't have to date non-feedists. I know this is something that will likely take a LOT of healing first, but I want to share my experience just so that you can see what a potential future looks like. First I tried dating on feabie, got into my first relationship, but it ended very badly for me. Again, it took a long time, but eventually, once I knew my self worth, knew that there are lots of people out there who will be into what I'm into, and could spot red flags, I was able to disclose my preference for feedism on regular dating apps. I didn't care what strangers thought. Some people asked me what it was all about, politely expressed that it wasn't for them, and we parted ways. It is such a relief to have potential partners know I'm a feedist up front. I eventually met my current partner and the love of my life on Hinge. I had feedism in my profile and he sent me a message saying, "hey! I'm into that too." If a feedist relationship is something you feel like you can't live without, I want you to know that it's possible for you. If you tell people what you're looking for, they will come. You'd be so, so suprised. But it takes a while to get there. The fact that you want it for yourself is huge, and I am so proud of you for reaching out for support.

Take it from someone who lied awake every night in agony, crying and worrying and wishing I just had someone out there to tell me that it was going to be okay.

Please know this, dear heart:

It's going to be okay. ❤️

[factcheckingmclennon]

Can you fact check This One being about John? It's an interpretation that really annoys me because I think it just comes from one rambling answer about relationships in general where he vaguely connects John and George's relationship to the song and not one where he's saying anything meaningful about his and John's relationship. I love the song and it's so outside of my interaction with it that I find the way it's accepted as McLennon fact really hard. But maybe there's a source out there I'm not aware of

oh i can answer this one immediately bc i am one of those believers (sorry anon, sob) & probably one of the folks who has annoyed you w this over on my main

but my answer is the same as it will be with pretty much Any lyric interpretation (unless it's a song that's like obviously and blatantly and said a million times to be about the other, like "here today" or "how do you sleep?") which is...

bc ultimately, as fans, we are all going to have our own interpretations of songs and that's fine! i mean, people shouldn't be repeating it as hard fact, but at the same time sometimes u just gotta breathe out & let people interpret how they will. (like i, for one, don't think "dear boy" is about john, but it's not my business if someone thinks it is)

so i will say now (& it is in my pinned, a bit), unless there's some definitive answer on a lyrics based fact-check (like, again, "here today" or "how do you sleep?"), my answer is pretty much Always gonna be neutral. but i will do on any of these types of questions is try & find both sides of the interpretation as well as any quotes from john/paul/others on the song.

so let's get into it ! i'll present both sides & try to remain as unbiased as possible but do know i Am one of the people that thinks it's about john and it's okay that you're not and it's fine that i am. we are all living in peace and harmony and mclennon here lmao

so here's the quote in question (which i'm sure you know, but for everyone else):

Interviewer: Let me ask you about one of your new songs, ‘This One’. About a marriage? Paul: A relationship, yeah. Interviewer: And about not expressing emotions and feelings.  Paul: You get those moments where you always think; "I’m saving it up. I’ll tell him one day." And you know what happens. A lot of people, John for instance, getting back to that subject. He died. Um.. I was lucky. The last few we- months that he was alive we’d managed to get our relationship back on track. We were talking, having real good conversations. Real, nice and friendly. George, actually, didn’t get get his relationship right. I think they were arguing ‘till the end, which I’m sure is a source of great sadness to him. And I’m sure in the feeling of this song that George was always planning to tell John he loved him, but time ran out. That’s what the song’s about. Like, there could never be a better moment than this one. Y’ know now. Take this moment to say… "I love you."

(source) (again, an archived blog, but it's audio so i'm using it as a legit source)

argument for it being about john

well, to start with, paul immediately answers with "i'll tell him one day" which, regardless of if it's about john, is a very blatantly queer answer. maybe a slip of the tongue, who knows, but there's not much question at the least that this song is romantic. so paul saying it's about a "him" is very interesting, even if it's not john. (edit: given the youtube video linked below, it can also be heard as "them". i still don't hear "them" or think it's continuous, but that is one interpretation & hearing of this interview and it's a valid one!)

second, he does connect it to george and john's relationship, but he does it in a way that's just again connecting the song to him and john. he says "i'm sure in the feeling of this song that george (...etc)" which is just him saying he thinks george can relate to the feeling of the song.

and ofc back to the beginning of the quote, right after saying "i'll tell him one day" he says "a lot of people, john for instance (...)" which is just connecting that sentence to john. he goes on to say they got their relationship right, but then at the end loops back around to saying the song is about regretting not saying "i love you", which we know from "here today" and other paul quotes he does deeply regret not saying to john. so an Entire Song about that regret is not like. unfeasible to be about john.

i will say, i at least think this song is about more than one thing. he says here it's about that type of relationship he had with john (or the nebulous "him" who i mean. who else would that be? tara?) and then he does also talk about how he had fun w the storytelling w the word play on "this swan" and the hindu imagery. (edit: also with the full context of the youtube video below, this is even more relevant, because paul also talks about family and a "her". imo, it's more than likely a song about many people/relationships. some people think that one of those is john, myself included!)

argument for it not being about john

like you said, it is a bit of a rambling answer! and saying it's about john IS just an interpretation. paul saying "him" could've been a slip of the tongue, or maybe he had some other romantic relationship with a man we're not privy to, or maybe he did completely mean all those lines platonically and it's about various men he's been friends with or even john in a platonic way.

he does also connect the song to george and john, so it could be about that. i've also seen someone posit that here he is trying to reach out to george in his own way- thinking george must have the same regrets as him with john & thus this is his attempt to repair that relationship before they have those regrets with each other too.

and ofc, it could just be a totally hypothetical song. he never says it's about his own life, and he does include a lot of fictional imagery about a swan in this song. he could just be telling a story he doesn't necessarily relate to.

edit: there is also a full youtube video (time mark for part of this interview comes at 59:51). in the video, paul also mentions parents as someone you might regret not telling how you feel. following another edited clip, he says the "I’m saving it up. I’ll tell him/them one day," line, which can also be read as a "them" referring to parents rather than a "him". he also mentions a "her" in this interview as well, which adds credence to the fact that this song is about many types of relationships/people and this doesn't necessarily mean it's about john at all. or that if it is, it's romantic, since he mentions parents as well.

[desi-girll]

trigger warning (mentions of violent anonymous asks. please don't read if you're triggered by mentions of self harm)

hi! so let's get straight to the point. if you're reading this, you might be thinking "okay just delete these asks. what's the big deal?" but that will not address the issue someone apparently has with me, right? so, as much as i hate this negativity (and this is going to be a one time thing only because this blog is my safe space), if you're the person who sent these to me, let's just talk, okay?

look, I'll be blunt, these asks are very triggering. as someone (here we go again lmao) who has struggled with self harm in the past, you could've easily triggered me into doing it again had i not been in a better place mentally. i don't know you, neither do i know why are you are sending out these hate asks. but if it's just a prank and you've been sending these out randomly, please stop. you could really cause some serious harm with your words.

if it's something i've done that made you angry, dm me and we'll talk, i promise. if it's not, if it's something else, then let's talk too. maybe you're hurting and that's why you're lashing out? i get the feeling. whatever it is, please understand that it isn't fair for others to have to suffer in whichever way (emotionally, mentally, physically) because of you. i swear your feelings of hurt are valid too, but that doesn't give you the right to hurt others, okay?

i sincerely hope your emotions won't get the best of you next time, and that you'll think multiple times before saying stuff like this to someone else in the future because remember, words cut deeper than knives.

ps: this is the first and last time I'll be addressing issues of such kind. in order to protect my own mental health, as well as maintain the positive energy in this blog, I'll be switching off anon asks both here as well as on my sideblog (@neet-aspirant ) for sometime. i hope yall understand. dms are always open tho <3

[antiyourwokehomophobia2]

I have such a huge fear that homophobia will become socially acceptable again but this time it won’t just be from Christian right-wing people but from “progressive” leftists too all thanks to the gender cult doing everything they can to make homosexuality bigoted.

“Oh you’re a lesbian and you’re only attracted to vaginas? You’re a gay man and you’re only attracted to penises? Ummmmm that’s pretty transphobic of you :/“

I fear for the next generation of young gays and lesbians.

Someone in my discord said something that has really stuck with me. She said "the majority of the world doesn't like gay people" and I realized that she's completely right. The truth is, homophobia is very normalized by the left and right wing lmao. I don't mean to be a doomer anon. I am an optimistic person at heart, but your fears are extremely valid. I've come across multiple YouTube videos of people tearing down gay flags and being homophobic and the comments are FILLED with support. It's wild. If I'm being completely transparent, I try to hide being gay now. I didn't care before but now I do. I just can't stand being associated with any of what's going on lmao. I'm just a woman who happens to be gay. It's not particularly interesting. I dunno, anon I could go on forever. Like I said, I'm an optimist at heart, so I'll say this. You're not alone. I'm in your corner and so many other people are, too. If worse comes to absolute worst, we are never alone ❤️

[sleepey-demon-liker]

Omg I love seeing new obey me blogs!!! Welcome ♡♡♡♡♡ Could you do the bros with a genderfluid s/o?

Demon bros with a genderfluid s/o!

A/N: Thanks so much for requesting anon! I'll totally make an anon list if you or anyone else wants to join 👀 I think it's a fun way to be familiar but still remain anonymous! I hope you enjoy!!! <33

P.s. if I got anything wrong I'm really really sorry!!! I'm not genderfluid myself but I do ofc know it and I even have friends that are, so I tried to be as inclusive and broad as possible, I hope I did okay :')

Lucifer:

• I could see this one of two ways:

• One, he is actually very understanding!

• Will use all of your pronouns in a cycle when speaking of or about you

• Or if your the type to wake up and have specific pronouns and style each day he can usually tell, and will use them accordingly!

• So thoughtful and sweet of him <3

• Or.... there's the Lucifer that is old... and may not understand as well... lol

• You will have to explain to him, and although he may be confused, he is respectful, and catches on really quickly!

• Mans is trying his best WHABJSBWNDN

• Overall, very aware and respectful of you and your identity, would never judge you for such a thing

• If anyone DOES judge you, they are sure to hear from him and Diavolo later~ <3

Mammon:

• Also gives off the vibes that he wouldn't really know what being genderfluid is HSGSHSBS

• Of course, once you explain it to him, he is also quick to correct himself and learn if there's certain names or pronouns you would prefer, given the day or anything like that

• Doesn't think much of it afterwards. If that's what you are, he's cool with it, that's what you're comfortable with and loves you all the same <3

• It's easier for him if you use your pronouns in a cycle, because he rarely pays attention or cares what you look like (you're hot in anything so like???) so he may not notice if that's your style of the day

• If you guys ever went clothes shopping together he would lowkey try to buy you the whole store WHAHAHSHSBS

• "I found some clothes I thought ya' would like. Whadya mean this is too many!?"

• Very happy with you, and he will fight anyone who wrongs you~

Leviathan:

• The first of this list who actually knows what genderfluid is :D

• Bro is chronically online he knows all the identities and sexualities out there istg /hj

• Is so happy that you felt comfortable enough to tell him!! Like omg MC you trusted me with this I'm so proud of you and so in love with you you're so valid

• Literally what goes on in his mind but is too shy to say LMAO tsundere Levi real

• Can catch on to what you prefer day by day or just uses a cycle, both come easy to him

• (Will actually ask which of those you are/prefer)

• Would probably make a corny ass joke like "Omg the weather is getting colder MC, make sure you don't turn into a gendersolid! lololol"

• Goes without saying but never judges you! Will also call anyone who does a stupid normie and may deal with them later when you're not around hehe

Satan:

• Also one who knows about it

• He reads so many books you can't tell me he hasn't read books about humans and human psychology and involved with that is gender identity

• Of course he is very respectful and sweet. When you tell him, he immediately starts to use all your pronouns/preferred ones!

• Will call you all sorts of petnames. Beautiful/handsome/gorgeous as examples bc he's an eccentric ass demon lmaoooo

• Loves you for you and doesn't care about your identity, as long as you're comfortable, and he will always be sure of that

• You have no bullies or harassment at RAD bc Satan has, well... dealt... with them <3

Asmodeus:

• Melts into a puddle when you tell him bc he knows how much courage that takes and it shows that you Love and trust him that much, he's just so moved, he may cry!

• Thinks you're attractive no matter what, and is another to call you petnames. So. Many. Petnames. Just when you think you've heard them all, there's 10 more falling from his beautiful lips

• Will totally go on a shopping spree with you, buying you dresses/suits/whatever you want in whatever style you desire

• Will also totally paint your nails and do your hair however you want if you're feeling a certain way

• Corrects everyone and/or constantly reminds everyone to respect you

• (If that makes you uncomfortable he will totally turn it down but he is not about to let people get away with disrespecting his MC!!)

Beelzebub:

• I doubt he knows what it is before you arrive, but once you explain it to him he's just like oh. okay

• Not because he doesn't care! Well, he doesn't care in the sense that it doesn't bother him! He has just already committed your identity and pronouns to memory and will not make a big deal of it!!

• Pays very close attention to you though. Can and will notice your change of mood and immediately ask if someone's bothering you, or if you're doing okay (this goes for style too)

• Understands dysphoria and always shares his food with you in hopes that it may make you feel better <3

• Boy is such a sweetheart to you and so aware of your feelings and does everything he can to show how much he loves and appreciates you ^^

Belphegor:

• I can also see this going one of two ways, but this is just for if he knows of it or not

• I can see how he may know about it because he did have a love for humans back in the Celestial Realm so he could have known about it

• But part of me thinks it may have been way too uncommon back them for him to know about it so idk, either way this is his reaction

• "Okay."

• LMAO- Like Beel, he doesn't care because he loves you either way and as long as you're happy and comfortable, that's none of his business what you are

• Is easier for him if you just cycle your pronouns as well because it requires less thought and awareness on his end

• When he actually thinks about it and realizes it probably took you a lot of courage and trust for you to tell him, he appreciates it a lot more and is more mindful as well. Would never tell you that though lol-

• Will definitely scare off any bullies at RAD. No one messes with his MC and gets away with it <3

Kyaaaaa first post and first request done! I had a lot of fun writing these, and again I hope I did okay!! Thank you anon for requesting and again I hope you enjoyed!!

See you lovelies next time~ ☆