#And if it’s warm then I get the thermometer to double check

[domesticgoddess22]

banana creampie

a thanksgiving one shot

pairing: dbf!joel miller x fem!reader summary: Your dad is hosting Thanksgiving this year, and he's invited his closest friends, including Joel Miller, who drives you to get ingredients for your famous banana cream pie. warnings: dbf!joel, age gap (early 20s/mid 40s), car sex, unprotected piv, daddy kink, breeding kink, cowgirl, rough sex, creampie, daddy issues, TLOU AU no outbreak, dubcon, praise kink word count: 3.3k rating: explicit MDNI

Happy Holidays <3 This is a little something I cooked up on Thanksgiving day, so I hope you enjoy it. Sorry it isn't edited yet.

**update: I completely forgot to mention that I got a lot of inspiration from a scene in Macfrog's cowboy like me, when MC and Joel go to the grocery store.

~~~~~~~~

Rays of orange spilled across the living room carpet, the sun peeking through the curtains that ebbed and flowed to the cool Austin breeze. The slivers of the light that dotted the couch warmed your bare legs, still shining from the lotion you lathered yourself up with. You turned the TV volume to blasting to overpower the chaotic sounds of your dad’s cooking. 

“You gonna get dressed and help your old man out here, kiddo?” Your dad’s head poked out from around the archway that led to the kitchen, a greasy spatula in hand and your brow furrowed at the drips that now splattered on the white tile.

“I am dressed,” you contested, eyes rolling into the back of your head. You just came back from college, celebrated your twenty-second birthday even, but your dad would always see you as a kid.

He frowned, eyes closing as he shook his head in disapproval before dipping back into the kitchen. It would take some getting used to, your new attire since coming back from NYU, that is. If there’s one thing your fashion degree taught you, it’s how to dress. You wore a juniper green corset top, laced up from the front and tied together to display your breasts nicely. The top was fashioned with a black, skin tight mini skirt with a slit along the right thigh, leaving little to the imagination.

You groaned, rolling off the couch lazily, but careful enough not to ruin your hair. Big, glossy curls cascaded down your back, bouncing slightly as you stood. There was a bow as red as wine that held your hair together in a half updo, so any cream from the pie you were about to make wouldn’t splash into your hair.

You dragged your feet to the kitchen, cracking open the pantry and digging for the ingredients to make your famous banana cream pie. 

“So whose all comin’ again?” You asked, eyeing the recipe to determine if you should still double the portions. You knew your dad’s friends were comin’, they always did, but you figured you’d check and make sure there wasn’t any changes.

“Donna and Rick, Keith, Rob,” your dad began listing off his friends, cursing when a splash of sausage grease sprayed his arm. “Oh yeah, and Joel and Sarah are comin’.”

Your eyes widened. “Oh?” You tried to come off casual, like your heart wasn’t about to burst in your chest at the sound of your dad’s best friend–the hottest guy on the block. “Thought they were goin’ to Tommy’s this year?” 

“They were, but Tommy and Maria are sick, so there’s been a change of plans,” your dad said, oblivious to how Joel’s name reddened your cheeks.

“That okay?” Your dad finally asked when you didn’t say anything.

“‘Course, why wouldn’t it be?”

“I guess I forgot to tell ya with all the holiday craziness, it must of slipped my mind. Do you have enough ingredients to make your little tart?”

“Pie,” you corrected. “It’s a banana cream pie, dad.” You chewed your cheek, annoyed with his inability to pay any attention to you.

“Right, of course, of course. Do you have everything you need?” He’s half focused on checking the turkey now, the oven door screeching at the hinges as he stabs a thermometer into the near-browning meat.

“Actually, I’m gonna need more cream if I double this recipe.” You frowned, thinking about how you’d need to run to the store on Thanksgiving day and fight traffic and long lines. Not to mention, you haven’t gotten your license yet, there was no need for it in New York with all the subways and taxi cabs. 

“Call Joel ‘n ask him to be a doll and pick some up for you ‘fore he gets here.”

You slipped back into the living room, away from the hiss of sausages cooking, and flipped your phone open. Joel picked up, the sound of his rumbly voice left you forgetting what it was you called for in the first place.

“Hey, darlin’. What do you need?”

“Hey. Was just wonderin’ if you could be a doll and pick up some heavy cream for me before you get here?”

You heard him laugh through his nose. “On Thanksgiving Day?” 

“The stores are open for a half-day,” you said flatly. “But I guess if you don’t want my famous banana cream pie, then don’t bother.” There was a sweet, playful lilt to your tone at the latter, but their was a shuffling sound followed by a car door slamming.

You heard the sound of the front door crank open, as old and rusty as it was, and your head whipped around to see the very man you were on the phone with. He held a case of bears in his other hand. The two of you mirrored each other, flipping your phones shut.

“Look who decided to come back from New York.” Maybe it was wishful thinking or ovulation that was playing tricks on your mind, but you swore that his eyes clung to your hips, your breasts. 

“For now.” You said, ending the conversation right then and there. You didn’t want to entertain questions about what direction your career was going in and all that bullshit that you didn’t have answers to. “So I take it you’re not gettin’ cream then?”

“Didn’t say that. 'Course I want your pie.” He smirked at you right as Sarah came flying in, a giant sack of potatoes in her hand. She nearly jumped out of her boots when she saw you, screaming your name in excitement.

“You’re here, you’re here, you’re here!” Sarah dropped the potatoes on the floor with a thump, rushing to hug you. Your arms tightened around her, breathing in the sweet, citrusy scent of her curls.

“Oh my god, I haven’t seen you in forever! And you’ve gotten so big!” It was true. Last time you saw Sarah was probably a year ago. She had just started middle school, but now she was almost as tall as you. “What, did ya hit a growth spurt or something?!” She beamed at you proudly.

“I’m 5’1” now!”

“Where’s your dad?” Joel asked.

“Kitchen. Makin’ a mess, cooking up a storm.”

“Hey bud,” you hear Joel say casually to your dad. And then you hear him say that he’s going to take you to the store, ordering Sarah to get started on the potatoes while the two of you run out. You feel your face go hot and your palms all sweaty at the thought of being alone with Joel. The two of you have never been alone before.

You rush to the side table, dotting your lips with a subtle, pink gloss. Joel strides back into the living room.

“Alright, let’s go.”

“It takes two people to go pick up some cream?” You taunt, and not quite sure why you do. Your heart was soaring at just the thought of being alone with him, and maybe it was because of that you put on the facade. The mask that you didn’t want to, just so he didn’t somehow find out that you were dying to be around him. 

“Did New York teach you to be this sassy? I liked it better when you were just Texas sassy.” He smirked, grabbing his keys and motioning for you to follow him to the front of the house to his truck parked in the driveway. Still the same old chevy. Still the same old Joel. 

“Aww, are you sayin’ you missed me?” You liked keeping up with his playful, teasing banter.

“We all did.” There was a sweet look in those big brown eyes that, for the first time, locked on yours. “Didn’t think you were gonna come back to this old town.”

“Yeah, I’m still figuring things out I guess. New York… wasn’t everything I had imagined it would be.” The thought seeped in and you felt the pang of disappointment. 

“You’re young. You have plenty of chances to try things, fuck up, and then try som’ new.” 

The engine roars to life, and you realize then that you were freezing. But it was too late to change now, Joel was already halfway down the block by the time you really gave it some thought.

“Those flimsy pieces of fabric not keepin’ you warm?” He gave you a quick side glance. He sounded like a scolding father with the way he said it. Not the same judgement as your dad, but of a similar breath, as if to say ‘I told you you shouldn’t have worn that in this weather.’ 

“I’m fine,” you scowled, but Joel must not have believed you as he cranked up the heater. 

“I have a sweatshirt in the back, you can wear that when we get out.” He jabbed a thumb toward the back of the cab, and then gave you another side glance, this time his eyes were on your thighs. “I know I ain’t your dad but–”

“No, you’re not.”

“You wear som’ like that, on a day like today, Kieth is gonna get drunk and his eyes’ll be all over you,” his face scrunched in disgust.

“I can handle Kieth,” you snorted. Kieth was your dad’s other friend, one that has been blatantly lusting after you every time you’ve come to visit. Your dad never seemed to notice, but it seemed like Joel had.

“Or…” You teased, lips pulling into a cat-like smile. “I can just let him look at me, if he wants to. He’s a decent looking guy, could probably use a little fun since he’s been divorced for what, two years now? Three?” In all honesty, if Kieth hadn’t been standing next to Joel every time he came around, you’d probably think he was the hottest guy on the block.

Joel’s grip around the steering wheel tightened. “You like him?”

“I dunno. I’m young, I don’t know what I want. I have plenty of time to fuck up.”

“My advice to you? Don’t fuck up with Keith. Guy’s a fuckin’ mess. And your dad would probably kill him.”

Your head slams back against the headrest and you let out a roaring laugh. “My dad wouldn’t even notice.” 

“He would.”

“Well, then who should I fuck up with then?”

“That’s for you to decide, darlin’.” Joel’s voice was low, his sweet Texan tang like music to your ears.

“But not really because you said I can’t have Keith, so who does that leave me with? You?” You bit your lip and smiled while Joel continued to look straight ahead at the open road. “I guess it’s only fair. It’s only been three years since Kieth’s divorce, but it’s been nearly a decade for you.”

It was quiet for a minute, and you worried that you pushed to far. Flirted to hard. You waited for him to scold you, say something and make you feel ashamed for your advances and commenting on his failed marriage.

“You’re gonna piss off your old man, sleepin’ with all his friends,” Joel finally said, and it was that comment that gave you the opening to press forward. Joel put the car in park when you pulled up to the country market, the lot nearly empty. Not quite as a packed as you thought it’d be. 

“Not all of them.” Your gaze bore down at his lap and then slowly, slowly let your eyes roam up his chest until you met his, lookin up at his through thick lashes, biting your lip. “Just one.”

He shifted in his seat, cracking open the chevy door. “Let’s get your cream.”

You wore Joel’s sweatshirt, just like he told you to. It smelled like him, a musky, woody scent that made your pulse quicken with each inhale. He trailed behind you as you all but skipped down the aisles, heading straight for the cream. You grabbed another set of bananas too, just in case you needed to top off the pie. Joel was eerily silent the entire time, and you hoped it was because he was horny, not becuase he was mad. Or maybe it was a little bit of both. You smiled devilishly at the thought.

When you dropped the bananas and cream on the belt, you pulled out a few bucks to pay for it all, but Joel’s wallet was already out, handing the cashier a few bills. “Hey, I was gonna pay for it.”

The cashier, a kind old woman, bless her soul, just smiled at the two of you. “Let daddy pay.” Your face dropped and Joel stiffened, grabbing the receipt and storming out. You tail after him, but his footsteps eat the ground, and you’re practically running to keep up.

“Woah, woah, woah! Slowdown their cowboy, I’m not used to running this much.” 

He flung the door open, jumped in the truck and took a long, deep breath. He was silent again. Joel was always a man of few words, and you always wondered what he was thinking. There were times over summer break–when you’d come back to visit, wearing nothing but a string bikini while you splashed around in his pool–you wondered if he thought of you. 

“Is everything okay?” You tore his sweatshirt off, feeling the heat build up on your skin now that something was amiss with Joel.

Joel groaned quietly, letting his elbow rest on the side door and burying his eyes in his left palm. 

“You’re so young. We shouldn’t be… shouldn’t be talkin’ like this. It ain’t right.”

“I thought we were just havin’ fun.” You said, eyebrows stitching inward at the fear of rejection.

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s fun.”

“Then what’s the problem?” An innocent question, and then your eyes trailed back down to his pants and it was then that you realized you didn’t need an answer.

“Seeing you, prancing around in your little fuckin’ skirt and your shirt that barely covers your tits… fuck. I–that’s part of why I gave you my sweatshirt. So I didn’t have to look at you and torture myself anymore.” He starts, slowly turning his gaze to look at you. “But it didn’t make a difference. You… are so fuckin’ gorgeous I can’t hide my desire. Can’t go back to your dad’s like this.” He buried his face in his palm again, wishing away his erection. 

Wetness pooled between your thighs at his confession. You felt your mouth water as you eyed the length of him through his jean, a pulsing throbbing mass that you’d give anything to have a taste of.

“Then let’s not go back like that.”

He turned back to you, slowly. You exchanged a look of mutual agreement, and as he opened his mouth to respond, you slid a leg over him and perched yourself on his lap, straddling him. Feeling the heat of him through the fabric of your panties. He rolled the sit back slowly, and then ground his hips against yours, his mouth hot on your neck, sucking and licking at your sensitive skin. The hair of his beard scraped against your chest and shoulder, but you didn’t care. 

“Baby…” he whispered into your ear, hands groping your mounds, thumbing the sensitive peaks. And then his mouth was back to sucking your neck, pulling soft moans from your lips as he did so. He slid his hand up your shirt, his calloused palm flush against your bare skin. His body heat warmed you in the cold november air.

Your moans became louder and more frequent with every fondling stroke of his hands on your breasts, your hips, and your ass. The wetness of his tongue against your neck. You cried out his name, begging, pleading him for more as your ground your hips on his lap. He groaned in approval.

“This what you want?” He asked, teasinglly pulling your pants to the side and letting his finger feel the wetness there before pulling away. 

“Yes, yes, please, please, please.”

And then he let his fingers slide along your clit before rubbing in a smooth, circular motion. “Fuck, you’re wet…” 

You moaned and begged him to continue, and your sweet cries left him thirsty for your lips. His mouth locked onto yours, tongue exploring you without any reservation. He kissed you roughly, like you belonged to him, and when you moaned at his touch between your legs, the rumbling growl that came from somewhere deep within his chest poured into your mouth. You cried out, spreading your legs as far as you could in the driver’s seat and let yourself fall into the white hot release, body convulsing as he rubbed you through your high. 

As you came too, you heard the sound of his belt unbuckling. His cock was out not even a second later, the massive, swollen head slick with precum. He was huge, both in girth and length, and you almost shied away. Worried he wouldn’t fit. But he didn’t give you time to turn back as he lifted your hips from his lap, lined up at your entrance, and then forced you down on him in one long stroke. 

“Good girl,” he said into your ear.

You screamed, biting his shoulder to hold back any other screams that might tear from your lungs and give you both away. Your hips moved on their own accord, bouncing on his cock, bigger than any dildo you’d ever used. 

“Joel… fuck me! Please, please!”

His hips bucked up, slammed into you, somehow deeper with every thrust. He growled, eyes trained on your bouncing breasts that are now exposed, the corset snug underneath them, propping them up for his pleasure. His hands found a spot on your hips, gripping you hard enough to bruise. 

He slammed into you, filling you to the brim in violent thrusts. You continued to bounce, your movements matching his but his stamina outmatched yours and you let him use your body for his pleasure. He fucked you, the truck bouncing in rhythm to his thrusts, the sound of Pink Floyd’s Shine On You Crazy Diamond playing quietly on the radio. You thanked God for the cold air fogging the windows of the truck, otherwise you’d be on display for the world.

“Come inside me, please daddy.” You begged, and then wrapped our arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

And that’s what undid him. You. Both of you. Joel bucked his hips into you in sloppy, violent thrusts. You screamed, reaching the blissful release again, screaming daddy, daddy, daddy as he took you there, pouring his white hot cream into you in an endless load. You begged him for more and he buried himself into you.

And then your body went limp against his. Once bouncy, boisterous curls now sticking to the sweat on both of your faces.

“Fuck…” Joel groaned, pulling his cock out of you. Both of you pulled yourselves back together. You combed your fingers through your hair and Joel handed you a wipe to clean yourself up. “‘M too old to be this impulsive. Look what you did to me.”

You smirked, wiping the white milk from between your legs. “And I’d do it again.”

When Joel pulled up to the driveway, you noticed more cars parked out front. “Looks like everyone else showed up.”

Keith was in the living room as you and Joel entered the house, a frown plastered on his face when he looked at you, your neck, and then cast a glance at Joel. You looked in the mirror by the door and found a hickey the size of a golfball tattooed on your neck, covering it with your curls as soon as your realized the evidence.

“Hey, look who finally came back!” Your dad strolled over, a smile on his face that you knew would be wiped away the second he found out what you did with his best friend just moments ago. “Did you get what you needed?”

“Yeah, we got the cream.”

More cream than you needed, actually.

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

oh no, i hope you get better soon! you deserve to be in the middle of a sleep token cuddle pile with the boys taking care of you :)

Waiting for antibiotics to kick in and hoping that I can get a free day off work tomorrow. 🫡🫧

But also….

No, but imagine them all finding out that you are unwell. You forbid them from coming to visit you because the tour starts soon and you would never forgive yourself if you were to get them sick too. But then you get woken up from your fever nap by your doorbell ringing. So you’re dragging yourself up, hair all messy, a blanket wrapped around your body. And you open the door to them bickering because iii forgot your keys.

“Not my fucking problem that your key is like hers”, he grunts before turning to you, “oh, hun…” and you’re being dragged into iii’s warm embrace. And it’s so comforting and warm and so exactly what your freezing body needs.

“Yeah, out of the hallway”, Vessel orders, “She will get even more ill, it’s windy here”. And then they are practically push you inside. Palm after palm coming to check your forehead. “Guys…”, you grunt, “I told you to not come”, you try to frown but that only results in your head hurting even more. “And have we ever listened, darling”, ii shrugs, already mid-watching up the dirty dishes in your kitchen.

“You need to shower 'cause this ain’t it”, iv pulls at the strand of your hair. “Thanks huh… kind of been busy being sick”, you grunt. “You look cute regardless”, he’s quick to interject with a wink, “I’m just saying that a bath would make you feel better”, he pulls you into his chest and you once again melt into a warm embrace, feeling your eyes closing.

“Come, I’ll help you wash up”, Vessel gently runs a hand down the back of your neck. “I’m not getting naked in front of you”, you wheeze, hiding your face even further into iv chest. “Nothing I haven’t seen before”, Veseel shrugs making you let out a gasp, “You haven’t seen my ass”. Laugher echoes through the apparent. “Questionable statement if we take last new year’s into consideration”, iii snorts. “Who are you to talk to, your dick was out before midnight”, you shoot him a look, sending everyone into fits of laughter once again. “Okay, bath now”, Vessel practically peals you away from iv before scooping you up in his arms, “Fun later”.

You don’t remember much of the bath time. Just Vessel humming beneath his breath as he washed your hair, running a wet cloth down your arms as you soaked in hot water. Every cough that slipped past your lips made him frown more and more. At some point iv had popped his head in to check on you, double-checking on what meds he needed to go grab. Once you were dried off and drowning in iii hoody, a big mug of tea was placed in your hands.

Your living room was now spotless. Blankets you didn’t even know you had thrown all over the sofa. “Chicken noodle soup should be done soon”, ii walked in a tea towel draped over his shoulder. You only crook your head to the side. “Don’t give me that look”, he flicks your nose, “You would do the same for us”. And where he’s not wrong, you still couldn’t get over the four men fussing over you.

“You are being too sweet”, you sigh, letting your body fall into the blankets. “So are you when you stay up for hours on face time after shit shows”, iii muses, scooting in next to you. You smile at him weakly, resting your head on his shoulder.

“Movies and cuddles?”, iv steps through the door, dangling a bag in his hands. “I call dibs on picking”, Vessel hums, pulling your legs over his lap. “You always pick”, iii rolls his eyes yet tosses the remote to him anyway. “Take two”, iv pops pills into his palm before handing them to you, “Save me a spot while I go look for a thermometer”, he pats your thigh before disappearing into the kitchen. “I swear if you all leave me a corner seat I will beat your ass”, ii shout back, making you all chuckle.

[cyanbugremix]

Sick Vampire - Stories of the Shaw Pack

Characters: Darlin'(Tank)/Sam, Vincent, Marie

CW: None; Fluff

Written August 2023

Summary: Sam gets sick and Darlin' is there to take care of him.

Can be found ✨here on Ao3✨, written by moi (cyan_bug37 on Ao3)

~~~~

Sam rarely got sick. Honestly it was a surprise that vampires could even get sick at all. Yet here he was, his head muddy and heavy, his nose making it hard to breathe, and standing up made him dizzy. One of his occasional coughs would ring out in the silent home. He had felt this way for awhile, but he honestly couldn’t remember what day it was.

“Google doesn’t say anything about vampires getting sick,” Darlin’ walked in with a warmed up mug. “Maybe we should call Vincent?”

Sam leaned forehead into his hands, his head too heavy to keep looking up. Darlin’s warm hands settled onto the nape of his neck, and stroked all the way down to his shoulders. Darlin’ was starting to get worried, as this was the third day Sam didn’t seem to be getting any better. They couldn’t tell if he had a fever, his temperature was not accurately reading on the thermometer, and honestly, Darlin’ couldn’t tell if his temperature actually changed.

“Sure,” Sam slurred, the effort of talking felt too difficult to do.

Darlin’ grabbed his hands and carefully placed the mug in them. His hands were shaking. Luckily they had put a straw in there, seeing as lifting the mug was a great effort. Sam took a sip of the drink and closed his eyes.

“I’m gonna be back in a second,” Darlin’ kissed his temple. “Just keep drinking the tea.”

Darlin’ slowly got up and grabbed their phone from the kitchen. Clicking on Vincent’s contact they held the phone up to their ear.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Vincent. This is Tank. Uh, Sam is sick. He’s not doing too hot, and I– I don’t know what to do? I figured I would call you before I tried calling a healer in my pack. Do vampires get sick?”

“Woah. Okay. How sick is he?”

Darlin’ bit their lip before responding, “He’s gotten worse from the first day. He can barely stand up without possibly fainting. And he seems to have a headache and he keeps talking to a minimum. He doesn’t seem very hungry either, I mean, vampires don’t eat much in general, but his appetite is unusual.”

“How long has he been like this?”

“Three days,” Darlin’ replied.

“I remember William saying that vampires can get sick sometimes if they drink bad blood–”

“He could be poisoned?!” Darlin’ panicked.

“Nononono. Not– no. It’s more like picking up a bug from school when you were a kid. Bad blood is a terrible term for this– He’ll be fine. Considering that I haven’t ever seen Sam sick before, this could be his first time exposed to the bug. I got sick like that once. You just have to wait it out.”

Darlin’ exhaled.

“I would suggest the usual when someone is sick, to just let them rest. I’d also call your healer if you want to double check. Make sure he gets something to drink from in a few days, if he’s still sick.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll text you if William suggests anything else. Don’t worry. He’ll be fine,” Vincent replied.

“I appreciate it, Vincent,” Darlin’ said.

“No problem! I hope he feels better soon!” Vincent said his farewell.

Darlin’ decided to call Marie next. Even though they didn’t know if Marie knew how to cure vampires, it still wouldn’t hurt. “Hi, Marie,” Darlin’ said as soon as they heard the phone pick up.

“Hi kiddo, what’s wrong?”

“Sam is sick,” Darlin began, and then proceeded to list off his symptoms that they told Vincent. “Do you know anything to help him feel better?”

“It's quite interesting that a vampire can get sick. I can’t say that I know anything about it though. I never really dealt with vampires much. I could come over today and see if I can do anything about it,” Marie suggested.

“That would be good. Thank you,” Darlin’ agreed.

“Sounds good. I’ll come by this afternoon.”

With that, the calls were done, and Darlin’ took a deep breath.

Then Sam called their name. Darlin’ quickly walked back into the living room. Sam had sat the mug down on the coffee table and was resting on his hand.

“Hey, how are you feeling,” Darlin’ brushed the hair out of his face. They sat down next to him, still with a hand on his forehead.

“Stop. . checkin’. . . for a fev’r, Darlin’,” Sam said, leaning down to place his head on his mate’s shoulder.

“I don’t think you can tell me what to do. You’re the sick one, who can barely even sit up,” Darlin’ retorted. Sam grumbled but stayed flopped over onto his mate.

“M’head hurts,” Sam then said.

“I know, baby,” Darlin’ stroked his hair. “I know.”

Sam harshly inhaled. “M’sorry.”

Darlin’ frowned, “For what?”

“Bein’ sick. I’m supposed to be takin’ care of you.”

Darlin’ couldn’t help but smile. “You’re my mate. I take care of you when you need it. Just like you take care of me, whether I’m upset, or sick, or bleeding out, or even all at once. I'd do the same for you, because I love you.”

They wrapped their arms around Sam, gently rubbing circles on his back. They stayed like that, while Sam heavily breathed and sniffed a couple times. He mumbled a thank you at some point.

“I called Marie,” Darlin’ quietly said. “She’s gonna come over and check you out this afternoon.”

Sam tapped his fingers twice on Darlin’. Ok.

“You should sleep,” Darlin’ added. They patted his back and he moved to lay back down. Except he dragged Darlin’ down onto him as well. “Sam. You have to let me go.”

“No. . . lay with me,” Sam peeked an eye open. Darlin’ looked into his red eyes and noted the dark circles under them.

“Ok.” They laid their head back down and lifted their legs up to lay between Sam’s. “This alright?”

Sam hummed, “Yes.”

Really they should be working on lunch, or dinner. They didn’t really like cooking, but they knew that home made foods were good for fighting colds, and it also gave them incentive to eat, which pleased Sam. Yet they also hadn’t slept with him in awhile, preferring to take naps in the nearby arm chair and then getting up again to make sure he was okay before worrying about taking care of him again. It was nice to finally be in his arms.

"Y'take such good care of me," Sam mumbled. His grip barely tightened around Darlin'.

Between Sam’s sighs and breathing— no matter how harsh they sounded— and the lack of sleep they accumulated, Darlin’ closed their eyes, sleep eventually taking over them as they comfortably laid in their lover’s arms.

~~~~

As always, I have no ownership or rights to these characters, stories, or franchises. I write this to appreciate the content Redacted ASMR/audio makes. Anything I write is not official in their stories, other than using moments from the original story line. I make no profit from this.

Please don't steal.

[sonic-adventure-3]

made “seven rings in hand”, amy’s yeasted donuts from the sonic cookbook! these are fucking delicious. i love donuts. i haven’t made donuts before so i have no point of reference for if this is a particularly exemplary or easy to follow recipe (Though For Some Reason I Doubt It), but these are some really fucking tasty donuts. they taste almost exactly like old-fashioned timbits, if not even better than.

as for gripes though, i need to tell a little story.

this recipe has you add the active dry yeast into a mixture of warm milk and melted butter, then wait 5 minutes, or “until the yeast begins to froth up”. i waited 5 minutes. then 10. then 15. my yeast did not froth up. at all. like it’s truly difficult to stress how much my yeast did not froth. tap water is frothier. given this, and the fact that my packets were like 4 months out date, i was very very scared that my yeast was dead as fuck, and i was sitting there with all my other ingredients mixed and ready to go.

so, to check if it’s a problem with my yeast or a problem with the steps i took, i bloomed another packet from the same batch in warm water and sugar, as directed on the back. and wouldn’t you know, it froths the fuck up.

so if it’s not an issue of the yeast being 4 months out of date, what else could i have fucked up? there’s a non-zero chance that my milk was too hot, as i don’t have a thermometer with which to accurately check it’s temperature, and i stirred the mixture periodically instead of letting it sit untouched. my milk was maybe hot but definitely wasn’t scalding, and i really doubted that stirring too much would be that lethal, so it seemed likely that my first mixture was still alive after all. but what if i’m wrong, and i really did kill it? i continue on, put a bunch of effort into kneading that dough, use up all these ingredients, just to make some nigh-inedible dogshit that doesn’t rise? i’d end up donutless. a fate worse than death or wasting another cup of milk and packet of yeast to make absolutely certain.

so i waste another cup of milk and packet of yeast to make absolutely certain. the milk is warm but definitely not too hot, i don’t add the butter until later in case the way it likes to sit on top was suppressing any bubbles, and i stir the yeast in just to combine and then i fuck off completely for 10 minutes. i do everything that could reasonably be expected of me. if it doesn’t froth now, it can’t be user error.

it doesn’t froth.

okay so this recipe is just stupid. something is wrong here. i put yeast into two different warm liquids, it bloomed in one, but not the other. why? my understanding is that yeast eats sugar with the help of water, turning it into carbon dioxide, and warmth ensures that it can do this effectively. milk has sugar in it. i know this. i haven’t thought to question not adding any extra like you do with water, because milk already has sugar in it. if anything, i thought it was smart; two birds with one stone. i also know that the sugar in milk is lactose. and that table sugar, on the other hand, is sucrose.

oh my fucking god.

yeast cannot ferment lactose. provided that you’re using normal milk, it’s like actually impossibile for the yeast in this recipe to froth up in just milk and butter. this recipe has sugar in it, but the sugar is in with the dry stuff. it all gets mixed together in the next step, so the yeast still does it’s job just fine. I THINK THIS RECIPE IN A COOKBOOK I PAID MONEY FOR AND SHOULD HAVE BEEN DOUBLE CHECKED BEFORE PUBLICATION SHOULD NOT HAVE INSTRUCTIONS THAT DESCRIBE A CHEMICAL IMPOSSIBILITY, THOUGH!!! JUST A THOUGHT!!!!!

these are really tasty though. and goddamn they better well should be after all that. i froze the dough after shaping and now i have fresh donuts basically on command, which is awesome.

[idolish7imagines]

Hiii could I request imagines for Tenn and Momo x Reader and what they’d do if they were stuck in the rain? Thank you🤍

Tenn and Momo with an s\o stuck in the rain

A\N: I hope you enjoy these! Sorry it took a while

.::.

Kujo Tenn

"Agh, you're definitely going to get sick. Let me take your temperature."

Your boyfriend heads to the bathroom cabinet with a sigh, looking over the shelves to see where the thermometer was.

Since you'd been slightly shaking (though you'd been trying to hide it so he wouldn't get even more concerned) there was a pink blanket thoughtfully draped over your shoulders by him so you could warm up.

That morning you'd nearly been running late for work, so you headed out without checking the forecast, which turning out to be to you dismay prompting the absence of an umbrella you desperately needed as it almost violently started to pour down right before you got off work.

Fortunately Tenn spotted you as he was walking home from the store, your job was conveniently nearby and you were standing under a roof at the entrance of your job's building praying that the rain would at least let up soon. To make matters worse you were even wearing short sleeves.

After your temperature is taken, he looks at the number on the thermometer, shaking his head.

"..is it bad?" You attempt to lean over to look.

"Not as bad as I expected it to be, but still." He frowns. "You should take an umbrella with you whether you're sure its going to rain or not." He scolds you.

You could only hold your head down and nod. There wasn't much you could say back to that, he had a point.

There a pause for a moment, and he leaves the room again.

Because of you being too cold and wet to think, you hadn't yet thanked him for walking you back to his house. Letting out a small hum while glancing around his room while you sat in his chair, you decide you'd do so once you got more settled. It was still pouring outside after all, so you weren't in a rush to leave.

Tenn returns with a small portable heater and a towel. Running water was heard from the bathroom.

"I'm going to wash your clothes while you take a bath, and then you can lie down next to this heater." He places it on the nightstand next to his bed.

You blink, looking at it and then into his pink eyes in slight surprise.

"Oh Tenn you really don't have to do all this, I'm fine right here." A fond smile crept onto your face.

"I don't mind. Besides, if your clothes are wet, not only will you be more likely to get sick from wearing it for a long time but you'll get my chair and blanket wet." He reasons with a stoic expression.

You have half a mind to give a half lidded stare back at him, but either way he had a point. Getting up from the chair, you neatly fold the blanket before heading to the bathroom.

"Thank you for everything tonight Tenn." You finally get a chance to say before walking in.

"Of course." You couldn't see it, but there was a small smile on his face.

Momo

Unfortunately you only have your work briefcase to hold over your head to shield you from the harsh rain as you began your commute home. It didn't help much, as the freezing droplets still hit the rest of your skin and clothes, but it was something. Your ride cancelled at the last minute and there were no taxis nearby.

You had barely noticed someone holding an umbrella walking past you, who soon stopped and did a double take in your direction, turning around.

"D−Darling?" A familiar voice is heard from them, and you finally look up from your downcast gaze you'd had since beginning this walk.

The rain stopped piercing your skin as there was now an umbrella held over your head.

"..Momo?" You blink a few times in shock.

"Where's your umbrella?" His tone is more concerned and worried than scolding, as he puts a hand on your back and continues walking with you to your house.

Once you're home, Momo walks inside with you, closing his umbrella and taking off his jacket.

"...Sorry, I should've asked first, but its too rough out there to just trudge through it all over again." He lets out a short chuckle. "Do you mind if I rest here for a minute?"

"Sure, go ahead. I owe you for walking me home." You begin taking off your own incredibly damp jacket, going to put both his and yours on the coat rack.

Thankfully his clothes weren't nearly as wet as yours, so you wouldn't complain when he sat on your couch.

"This is a little romantic, we're rained in together!" Momo jokes.

"I think the trope is being snowed in." You correct, letting out a small laugh while you made a hot drink for both of you to have to warm up.

"Still, its a good excuse to cuddle." He pauses, before dramatically gasping. "Do you think we were meant to conveniently be heading the same way?"

"Either way, its better than being rained on. And you saved me. So a win win." You smile at him. "Now go get the blanket off my bed so we can cuddle like you want."

[fledgedragonfox]

Three and One pt. 4

Black leaves the medical wing.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/58037422/chapters/158718385

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7

“Remember, two pills in the morning and two pills before bed. They’ll help with lingering pain and to prevent infection.” White informed him yet again as she continued to pack up a small bag of medication. Cyan and Purple had been dodging her as the head of medical prepared to release her patient. Black simply nodded amicably as she rambled. He had already heard the instructions on his medication and bedrest several times. He also knew that she’d included written instructions in the bag. In Black’s opinion, White was being paranoid. 

Though, without the extra guidance from the malfunctioning medical equipment, he supposed he could put up with it. Nine times out of ten, whenever a medical scanner or electric thermometer was brought over they would glitch out and refuse to work. Black was starting to get suspicious, but really there were no grounds for it. He could think of no reason at all that the medical staff would pretend that their equipment was on the fritz. Besides, with how White was still double checking everything, it was simply an asinine notion. They’d even insisted on Black using a wheelchair for the time being to help him get back to normal. 

“White, I think I’ve got it.” Black finally sighed as she began her checks again. “Besides, Blue and Rose already said they’d check in on me. And Pink is going to be bringing me meals when I can’t get to the cafeteria.” Black reasoned. White nodded in response, possibly more to herself than Black. She seemed to be going over everything in her head. Black wheeled himself over to pat her knee, before swiping the bag and attempting to race out of medical and to freedom. Sadly, he was stopped by a wall of dark red and muscle. 

“Oof! Black? What are you doing?” Maroon questioned, steding the smaller man and himself as they collided. 

“Trying to escape!” Cyan choked out through his cackles. Black looked back to see him doubled over with his helmet off. Purple looked on disapprovingly as White approached. 

She was angry.

“Seriously? One hour into having permission to leave medical and you can’t even wait for an escort before zooming away?” She began her lecture. Black groaned, letting his head fall against the back of the chair. 

“Whiiiiite, please!” Black moaned, “I just want to go back to my room.” White paused, took a breath, and levelled Black with a glare that could wither flowers. Black didn’t drop his puppy dog eyes, earning more giggles from Cyan. After a few minutes, white sighed in defeat. 

“Fine, fine. But Maroon and Gray will be escorting you back.” She said with finality. Black glanced back up at maroon and the now present Gray standing behind him. 

C̵̸̵̶̵̶̸̶̵̸̶̨̠͗̀͑́̊͝Ö̵̷̶̶̷̶̶̶̵̵̡́̌̏̌͜͝N̵̷̵̸̵̶̵̷̹͑͂̚͠c̸̵̶̵̸̴̶̸̴̷̴̵̷͎̯̣̖̐̌̓͛̐̈Ḙ̵̷̶̷̵̶̴̵̴̻̰́��͠r̶̸̸̸̴̵̵̸̴̴̼͕͙̆̍̀͜N̵̵̵̴̷̫̉ ̸̶̵̷̴̸̴̶̵̶̸̸̣̜͕̍̒̆̒̓̓a̷̵̵̴̸̵̵̷̸̷͈̝̤͙̘̋̊m̸̵̴̴̵̸̴̶̸̴̶̴̴̵̡̬̣̗̳̹̈́̄̅́̌ų̴̶̵̷̶̸̸̸̶̸̴̷̥̪̺͉̯̂͒͝S̷̷̷̷̵̵̷̴̵̵̯̻̲̦͋͊̋E̷̴̶̸̵̶̶̸̷̸̷̷̷̵̷̟̜̖̘̬̿͂̐͌̈́͠ͅm̵̷̷̸̴̸̵̷̸̶͍̮̗̍̌͒̚È̷̷̸̸̸̵̶̦͊̔N̴̵̶̷̶̶̝͒̇T̸̸̸̸̵̷̸̴̸̶̷̷̷̴̵̨͔̹̙͚͎͂͌́͋̄͝ ̷̵̷̶̵̵̷̴̵̷̴̩̯͔͐̂̈́̽̾Ằ̶̶̴̴̴̷̶̬̚d̶̵̴̵̶̵̴̪̱͕͝O̸̴̴̸̸̷̷̸͈̗͌̅̓R̵̶̶̷̴̷̵̵̡̛̯͒͘ā̷̵̶̷̴̵̸̶̷̸̠͍̫̤͓̇T̵̶̷̷̷̷̷̵̷͓̮͇̼͋̅ȉ̴̵̷̸̸̵̸̴͓̗̄͊o̴̸̸̷̸̷̶̴̴̴̢̦̞̦̝̫͊ṉ̸̴̸̵̵̵̷̵̸̵̴̴̷̸̤̺̲̜̀̌̓̽͐͆

Another micro headache made Black wince slightly, but he was getting better at handling them. Though the presence of them certainly gave him pause. He nodded his consent to White, allowing Maroon to step around him and grab hold of the handlebars of his chair. 

“Good, and make sure to follow my instructions.” White said, just as the door to medical closed behind the trio. Gray chuckled, brushing a hand against Black’s shoulder. 

“How many times did she grill ya?” He asked. Black grimaced. 

“Maybe nineteen?” He shrugged. Gray snorted behind his visor. Maroon simply sighed. 

“She’s just worried. We all were.” His warm voice somehow calmed Gray down and sent waves of comfort through Black. The trio settled into a comfortable silence as they entered the cafeteria and headed to the elevator up to crew quarters. Black’s room was blissfully close to the elevator. The door opened to reveal it just as he’d left it. Bed eclipsed by plushies from every stop in the galaxy they’d been to. Dinky string lights that barely worked hung from the ceiling. Gray cleared a spot on the bed for Black while Maroon wheeled him into the room. 

“Now, I know you’re eager to be out of Medical.” Maroon began as he assisted Black in transferring to his heavenly soft bed. “However, I and Red expect you to rest as much as you possibly can.” Blankets, freshly washed, were draped over the smaller man by Gray as Black settled back into the pillows. “Your duties will be restricted and monitored until we can be certain that you’re improving.” He finished. Black nodded, grimacing as Gray ruffled his hair.He sent a glance back at the smaller man as he left.

c̸̴̷̸̷̸̵̸̵̵̴̸̶̣̓Ō̷̷̴̶̷̴̷̴̷̷̸̵̷̵̴̴̶̸̸̖̠̑ṅ̸̸̶̵̸̵̸̷̶̶̵̸̷̷̶̵͇̭C̸̶̷̸̸̷̵̸̸̷̸̴̵̷̴̸̱̗̓e̶̶̵̶̵̶̵̴̸̶̶̶̶̵̷̵̵̴̸̢̥��̅R̵̵̷̷̷̵̷̷̸̷̵̴̷̸̸̷̻̓̎N̸̶̷̴̶̵̷̴̶̷̷̴̶̸̵̴̴̵̸̟̲͒̄ ̸̸̴̸̸̸̵̶̵̷̵̵̵̵̷̵͉̬͌G̸̶̶̷̴̴̷̷̷̷̶̴̶̵̷̵̵̷̶̹͔̑̈u̴̶̸̸̷̶̷̴̴̶̸̸̶̴̴̷̷̸̸̖̺̅͑ī̴̸̶̸̵̸̵̵̸̸̶̴̴̶̷̴̸̶̴̝̻̽l̴̵̶̸̸̶̴̸̶̸̴̵̸̊ͅt̴̸̸̵̸̶̸̵̷̷̵̶̸̬̀ ̸̷̷̸̷̶̷̸̷̶̵̷̸̸̷̴̱͌͋C̷̸̸̵̴̸̵̶̸̴̴̴̶̆ͅO̶̵̷̶̸̶̶̸̸̶̷̴̸̵̵̴̶̵̵̲̜͆͛n̵̵̸̶̶̶̶̷̸̴̷̶̸̵̸̶̫̝̓C̶̷̴̵̴̵̸̵̷̵̷̶̶̵̵̴̝̥͗e̸̶̸̴̸̷̷̶̶̶̶̴̵̵̸̷̦̓̓Ŕ̵̴̵̶̸̸̴̶̶̶̶̵̸̡Ǹ̸̶̵̷̷̸̷̶̶̶̸̵̸̷̷̸̶̷̴̻̭͛ ̶̶̸̵̴̸̷̸̷̶̴̷̸̣͘ğ̷̸̷̶̷̷̸̵̶̷̸̸̸̘Ų̸̷̸̵̷̷̶̵̸̸̵̵̴̸̵̴̵̸̶̞́̔ì̷̸̷̸̵̷̷̶̷̵̴̵̶̤l̵̴̴̴̸̵̷̵̵̶̷̶̴̶̶̴̮͎͛T̸̵̵̸̴̸̴̴̷̶̸̴̶̵̷̵͕̆̊ ̴̷̵̴̷̷̷̵̴̴̷̵̶̶̴̶̭͐͝g̵̷̶̵̵̷̵̶̴̶̶̶̷̷̶̸̷̸̷̬̱͑̕Ű̵̴̴̶̷̷̴̵̴̸̶̴̴̷̸̴̷̴̵̻̗͗I̶̷̴̶̸̷̸̴̵̸̴̶̷̶̴̷̳̐̈́L̴̵̶̷̶̸̷̵̶̸̴̶̸̴̷̵͕̈̊T̶̸̷̶̸̴̸̴̷̵̸̸̵̴̷̷̶̶̶̤̱͆͋ ̸̵̶̸̶̴̸̶̴̷̵̴̵̵̷̷͇̭̄G̴̴̶̸̸̶̴̵̶̸̴̸̸̵̴̴͈͎̍Ṵ̴̵̸̷̶̷̷̶̵̸̶̴̷̷̸̶̶̷̸̟͛̈́i̶̵̷̶̶̴̶̶̶̸̴̴̶̵̷̷̶̷̴͔͉͊̂l̴̷̶̷̷̴̶̵̸̷̴̶̸̴̶̸̶̷̶͎̤̓͑t̵̷̷̷̶̶̴̵̶̸̵̷̵̴̷̶̼̰̎ g̵u̶I̷L̷T̸

Black winced again as the sudden headache raced through him. Pain seared behind his eyes like hot pokers. Black’s hand flew up to cover his eyes as Maroon steadied him. 

“Another micro headache?” He questioned. Black nodded as the pain began to fade. “Get some rest.” Maroon rumbled. He too slipped out just behind Gray. Black was alone, for the first time in weeks he was completely alone. The fairy lights flickered above him. Black suddenly wished he’d thought to ask one of his escorts to shut them off. They’d make it hard to fall asleep. As he glared at them annoyed, their flickering became erratic. A dull throbbing made itself known in Black’s temples. 

Black reeled back in shock as suddenly the lights wined and went out. He was plunged into absolute darkness. His eyes slowly adjusted to the dim blinking of his personal console, and the buttons by his bedside. Labels for the window shutters  and ac stood out starkly against the blackness. Now he needed to make sure that there wasn’t an issue with the fuse. Lovely. Black cursed quietly, now wishing for more light to see. He felt around blindly for his chair when the throbbing returned. 

Black groaned and collapsed back into bed, the throbbing blinding his vision. Or was it lights? Or the darkness? Then there were the sounds surrounding him. Suffocating him in beeps, groans, hums, and buzzes. The noises slowly muffled back to their normal volumes. His eyes fluttered against the fading pain before coming into focus again. The lights were simply too bright to look at and…

The lights. They were on. 

Not just his fairy lights, but every light in the room, down to his desk lamp. His console had powered up and left idle on the startup screen. The window shutter had opened to reveal the stars. The air conditioning was on full blast, humming loudly and cooling the room. A glance at his bedside revealed his uncharged tablet on and glitching wildly. Black gaped, breathing ragged. 

“No way…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sorry for the short chapter, but I promise I'll update soon. I have some commissions to work on and a few other projects I want to update as well.

If you'd like to support me and get some sneak peaks, check out my patreon! https://patreon.com/A_M_W_Harris?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLink

[cleverhottubmiracle]

We independently evaluate all recommended products and services. Any products or services put forward appear in no particular order. if you click on links we provide, we may receive compensation. The Iron Snail The Big Question: Why Ditch the Pea Coat? The lining on the coat we’re talking about today is 50% wool and 50% alpaca. So riddle me this: why does the world’s largest and most powerful navy during the world’s largest and deadliest war switch to this little guy from their woolen fortress of a coat that we all know and love – the pea coat? What gives? This fabric is pretty sick, and it sucks that we don’t really use it anymore in the 21st century, but it had a very weird job. One of the jobs obviously was to protect you, keep the wind out, and stuff like that, but the other job was to make sure that you didn’t get trapped inside your jacket if you were covered with freezing salt water all day. The Iron Snail I made a rudimentary thermal testing system so we can check just how warm this museum-grade replica of a World War II Navy deck jacket actually is. What was the US Navy outfitting their Navy Personnel in the wettest, wildest, coldest, craziest conditions out there? I’m curious. The true question is: how good was the N1 deck jacket actually? People goo-goo gaga about this in modern days – everybody who wears big heavy boots and heavy jeans has one of these jackets. I have three now, so I’m no better, but how good are they actually? The Iron Snail And I want to compare it to what we’re seeing today, which is luxury versions of the same jacket. I have a $1,500 jacket – I didn’t pay that much for it, well it’s at $1,300. I’m wearing it right now, which is probably considered to be the greatest interpretation of the N1 deck jacket in history. It is by Dehen 1920, and it is a legendary jacket. I got it for an insane deal on eBay. Thank you, Patrick. It’s like taking candy from a baby. This is kind of the king until I got a message from a brand called Heat Strap, and they said, “Hey, you have to try ours out.” It weighs 7 lb, probably double the weight of the Dehen jacket, and I just got it. It can honestly stand on its own, and I didn’t precariously place it on anything. It’s just that big of a jacket. How warm is it, actually?   The Iron Snail Back to Maine: Let’s Talk Real McCoy’s The Iron Snail What’s poppin’ everybody? It’s young Mikey back with another article. I am still in Maine, and I live here. I hope everybody’s doing well. Quickly, I have the Real McCoy’s N1 deck jacket, which was loaned to me by Standard and Strange – a very cool shop selling peculiar and oddity clothing. The reason we needed this specific N1 deck jacket, which could have been probably Buzz Rickson as well, is because The Real McCoy’s and Buzz Rickson make some of the most period-accurate pieces that you can possibly get. The Iron Snail We’re looking for that pile because it’s a very specialty pile – it is 50% alpaca, 50% wool, and it’s supposed to have magical wearing properties. The pile on the Dehen jacket is mutton, and it’s three times higher than what we’re seeing on The Real McCoy’s and the Buzz Rickson’s jacket. So, is it still the same warmth because of the alpaca? The Science Behind My Sketchy Testing Method The Iron Snail So, you already know about my rudimentary thermal testing station, but let me explain the actual methodology behind it. And know that it’s – don’t take these numbers to heart. There is a huge margin for error, and hopefully, it’s not huge enough to totally throw out the results here, but still, there is. Either way, the rudimentary thermal testing kit is as follows: The Iron Snail The first thing you need is an infrared thermometer. The second thing you’ll need is a reptile heating pad. My girlfriend Taylor kept trying to steal it and put her feet on top of it. I placed a heating pad on the ground and put a little temperature gauge on it to let a machine know how hot it should be heated up to. That temperature was 98.6 degrees. Then I placed a jacket on top of it and saw how long it took to heat to 98.6 degrees, and then took the temperature of the outside of the jacket after 5 minutes, 10 minutes, and 15 minutes and took the averages and got some numbers. The Iron Snail The jacket temperature without the heating pad that I tested a few times in a few different locations was 66°. After the heating pad was placed under it for 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 20 minutes, and so on and so forth, the average temperature was 81°, meaning there was a change of 15° on the outside. The lower that number, the better insulator the jacket is. Temperature Change Comparison Table Product Key Features Material Warmth Performance Unique Details Dehen 1920 N1 Deck Jacket Legendary design, well-balanced warmth Alpaca-wool blend, fleece lining Third place in warmth test (11° change) Highly durable, luxury interpretation Heat Strap N1 Deck Jacket Double-lined pockets, quilted wool batting 24 oz canvas, wool insulation Warmest in the test (10° change) 2.5x heavier outer material than Dehen 1920 The Real McCoy’s N1 Deck Jacket Authentic WWII design, long storm cuffs 50% alpaca, 50% wool pile Change of 13° in warmth test Period-accurate craftsmanship Levi’s Sherpa Jacket (1990s) Classic sherpa lining, denim outer Denim with sherpa lining Second to last in warmth test (13° change) Simple design, nostalgic piece Pt 1. How And Why The N1 Replaced Everything The Iron Snail So the huge question that everybody’s been asking me constantly – they won’t leave me alone, people coming up to my door: “Excuse me, sir, why did they switch from the pea coat to the N1 deck jacket?” The pea coat is very beautiful, but it’s incredibly heavy, and it’s hard to maneuver compared to something like the N1 deck jacket. It’s hard to put on, it’s hard to take off, and it’s just stiff – although you do look like a million bucks in it. The Iron Snail So, the US Navy bids adieu to their pea coat. Instead, they made the deck zip jacket. It was based on the US Army’s combat winter jacket (I might be getting the name not perfect), but it was based on that because people in the Army really liked their jackets – they were nice and warm, and they basically had a pea coat fabric inside of them. But when you were on the cold seas, the jacket didn’t really make the cut because it had a lot of issues. One of the biggest issues that Navy personnel were facing was that they were either getting trapped inside of their jacket or trapped outside of their jacket – both of those not good. The immediate problem was that if you’re getting covered with salt spray, the salt spray freezes in your zipper, and you can’t zip it up, or you can’t unzip it afterward if you need to take it off if you’re overheating. The Iron Snail The second thing is the base of World War II zippers was brass, and they corroded in salt water, and when they were getting sprayed, they broke, which obviously sucks for the person that is wearing the jacket and wants to be warm or take the jacket off ’cause they’re too warm. But at the same time, if you’re the US military, you’re thinking, “Wow, this is very expensive – we have a lot of jackets that need to be repaired constantly because they’re all breaking.” The Iron Snail So, the main thing that the Navy tackled first was the zipper. So they said, “Okay, who, what profession wears big gloves, has a big coat, and needs to put it on and take it off very quickly?” Accountants! Weirdly enough, accountants in the 1940s wore huge accounting jackets and also leather accounting gloves while they did your taxes, and on the side of them, so they could take them off quickly and easily when they were done with your taxes, they put hooks on the side. The Iron Snail So the US Navy said, “Hey accountants, can we borrow that technology?” and they said, “Absolutely!” So, the US Navy made the deck hook jacket, which is an interesting system because typically, you have a jacket and two pieces of fabric, both sides of the jacket secured by a zipper. The deck jacket worked like this: you had fabric on this side in a C-shape and fabric on this side that was just kind of a flat shape, and they came together so your jacket could resist the elements. They secured all of that with those accounting hooks up on the side. This version of the jacket was good but still not 100% perfect. It’s just because there’s still metal on the outside, so you still have the same base issue. Also, there were some other problems with the jacket. One of them was the exposed storm cuffs, which were getting caught on things that sailors were trying to move and stuff, so that would also rip the jacket, be inconvenient, and be very dangerous as well. Also, did I do that thing where I say accountant again instead of firefighter? It happens all the time – you would not believe who I called when my fire alarm went off! Pt. 2 Breaking Down The N1 The Iron Snail So the US Navy looked at the zip jacket, the hook jacket, and they said, “Okay, got it. We know what works now.” So, the first thing that we need to focus on is the fabric of the N1 deck jacket. Grosgrain is the category Bedford cord falls into. There’s also jungle cloth because jungle cloth is a type of Bedford cord – they’re all kind of like classification systems, they’re all kind of cousins, I guess I should say that’s a little bit better way of putting it. The Iron Snail Essentially, what you can do is think of a plain weave – it’s just very boring, it’s very plain, that’s why it’s called that, just up and down, very easy-going, chill. Think of the Grosgrain family as basically a plain weave (it depends on the specific fabric we’re talking about, of course), but instead of both yarns being the same size, one is a big beefy daddy one. So when it goes over, it creates an actual rib, and sometimes you could add more yarns to make it thicker and stuff like that, but that thicker yarn is what gives us a lot of texture and a lot more durability. And by having a lot of those yarns very close together, we get a very tough, beefy fabric. Pt. 3 Armoring Up The Jacket The Iron Snail So there are two main things that we need to fix: number one, storm cuffs are still getting caught on everything. It’s also great along the hem – we have all of this knit fabric that will keep the cold air from coming in, but it’s kind of getting destroyed at all times. The Iron Snail So the first thing we can do with the storm cuffs is simply pull the fabric over the storm cuffs and extend that fabric so they’re protected, but they’re still there keeping the cold out. The second thing, though, was the closure system. The answer was never a one-system closure system. What I really like about this update again is that you could see how the designers were thinking. The first two times, they were thinking, “What is that one solution that will fix it?” but the third time, they thought to themselves, “Perhaps instead of there being one fix-all solution, we need to break the solution up.” The Iron Snail So we have the zipper that closes the jacket, but then we need to protect the zipper with a placket on the outside, and that placket cannot be secured with metal, or else it will corrode, and it’s harder to repair. It can be secured with a button, and if a button pops off, we can sew it back on – easy peasy, it’s gone, it’s done, it’s fixed. The zip jacket and the deck jacket basically had a pea coat fabric inside of them. But not really. It’s not pea coat fabric because it’s very heavily brushed by these big metal hooks that pull the fabric out, and they make it fluffy because when it’s fluffy, you have better insulation properties. The Iron Snail A big encompassing thing of all of this is the loft. So you can brush a woven fabric and get some decent loft – think of like a flannel. Or you can do what you see on sweatshirts a lot is you have a terry, you burst all of those loops, and it fluffs up and makes a fleece. Or you can use an animal skin that has fur on it, AKA mutton, and you have a fleece there. And finally, you can do what they’re doing on the Real McCoy’s deck jacket, which is sliver knitting. The Iron Snail With sliver knitting, essentially picture someone knitting like a very, very tight fabric, like a t-shirt fabric, for example, and as those loops are being formed and pulled, someone is on the side shoving little fibers into them – sliver, shoving them in there. As the loop tightens, it grabs around that sliver, and when you put that all together, and you do that a lot, that t-shirt fabric has all these things coming out of it, and bing bang boom, that is a pile. That’s what you’re seeing on the Real McCoy’s, and you can see there’s usually mesh backing that stabilizes everything. The Iron Snail You may have noticed that alpaca is getting, I feel like, more and more popular every day. It’s in t-shirts, it’s in pants, it’s in jackets, it’s everywhere for a bunch of different reasons, but the big reason that we’re focusing on today and the main reason is that it’s an incredible insulator. There are two things you really need to focus on with fibers when we’re talking about pure insulation properties: one, how fine is the fiber, and two, is it hollow? Alpaca is fine and hollow, so it’s very, very warm, which means that your coat, your jacket, or whatever it may be can be warmer without a lot of added weight. Pt. 4 The Monster N1 The Iron Snail I think it’s time we transition to the big mama – the Heat Strap’s N1 deck jacket (their interpretation of it). The big thing that you need to know is that the pockets are double-lined – there is lining inside of the pockets and on the jacket. I can feel the heat; it’s a classic Heat Strap build. I look like I could tackle a truck right now! This is a 24 oz canvas, so that is 2 and a half times heavier canvas on the outer than the Dehen. The Iron Snail I will say it feels a lot warmer, and I think that’s because the inside, instead of being just the fleece fabric that’s inside Dehen (nothing wrong with that; I was very warm all day), is a quilted wool batting. So we have a little bit more loft, and it’s a slightly different build. Okay, so this final section is really just a bunch of cool little rapid-fire fun facts that I think you would like because I really like them: The Iron Snail The first one is that I think Iron Heart might be the only brand that does this intentionally – some brands may do it by accident with fusing or something – but they have an interliner on their jacket, a very tightly woven fabric between the outer body fabric and the actual insulation layer on the inside to further stop the wind. That’s what we (The Iron Snail) are doing with The Mammoth – they were using another layer of wool in between so you get more warmth. The Iron Snail As I was saying before, the N1 was an entire system. The deck jacket is just what got really popular, but there were big pants that had suspenders on them and everything like that. I think there was also a bib as well. Those loops were placed on your shoulders and at your hips so you could secure the suspenders to your jacket so they wouldn’t fall down as you were running around. Also, your pants had little flaps that you could wrap around the inside loops. From my research, that is the best I could find. It was very hard to find an exact answer to that. Okay, so bing bang boom, put everything together, and the birth of an icon is here – the N1 deck jacket! Everybody loves it, and nylon gets really popular, and the US Navy is like, “Oh, we’ll just use that!” Pt. 5 The Warmth Championship! The Iron Snail And finally, the warmth championship! What is the warmest jacket that I have worn today? Obviously, it’s one from Fjallraven. We have an even bigger jacket from Fjallraven, but the change in temperature outside of the jacket when I put the reptile heater in (this is why I need a water bottle) was basically nothing. It basically didn’t change at all. The Iron Snail In second place, oh no, sorry, second to last place – I wanted to test something that wasn’t an N1 deck jacket just in case you wanted different suggestions, so I tested a ’90s Levi’s Sherpa jacket that I gave to Taylor when I first met her in college, and I wrote her a little love note on the inside which she still has – how cute is that? Either way, the Levi’s denim Sherpa jacket was actually warmer than The Real McCoy’s jacket by just two degrees, so again, it’s still within the margin of error. The Iron Snail That being said, there is something we need to touch on at the end, but before that, Dehen 1920 comes in third to last. Dehen’s change in temperature was 11°, and then finally, the warmest jacket that we tested today was Heat Strap’s – they came in with 10°. In reality, the big thing that matters is the actual design of the jacket with the materials being used, so The Real McCoy’s is warmer than the Levi’s Sherpa jacket just because of the storm cuffs alone – it’s longer, it seals out the wind, there’s a bunch of different factors. Watch This Review Wrapping It Up (Got Hot Chocolate Waiting) Okie dokie, that is just about my time, so I’m going to go home and have a big cup of hot chocolate. Either way, ta ta! This article was adapted from Michael Kristy’s video on The Iron Snail, with edits from FashionBeans, and was reviewed by Michael to ensure the integrity of his original content. Watch the full video here. The Iron Snail is a men’s fashion vlog (and now article series!) starring a young man named Michael and featuring a snail no bigger than a quarter. The two are set on taking over the world of fashion by creating a clothing line to end all clothing lines. Until then, we’re here to tell you EVERYTHING you need to know about the best clothing out there, from the highest quality raw denim jeans to the warmest jackets to the sturdiest boots…the Iron Snail has got you covered. Source link

[norajworld]

We independently evaluate all recommended products and services. Any products or services put forward appear in no particular order. if you click on links we provide, we may receive compensation. The Iron Snail The Big Question: Why Ditch the Pea Coat? The lining on the coat we’re talking about today is 50% wool and 50% alpaca. So riddle me this: why does the world’s largest and most powerful navy during the world’s largest and deadliest war switch to this little guy from their woolen fortress of a coat that we all know and love – the pea coat? What gives? This fabric is pretty sick, and it sucks that we don’t really use it anymore in the 21st century, but it had a very weird job. One of the jobs obviously was to protect you, keep the wind out, and stuff like that, but the other job was to make sure that you didn’t get trapped inside your jacket if you were covered with freezing salt water all day. The Iron Snail I made a rudimentary thermal testing system so we can check just how warm this museum-grade replica of a World War II Navy deck jacket actually is. What was the US Navy outfitting their Navy Personnel in the wettest, wildest, coldest, craziest conditions out there? I’m curious. The true question is: how good was the N1 deck jacket actually? People goo-goo gaga about this in modern days – everybody who wears big heavy boots and heavy jeans has one of these jackets. I have three now, so I’m no better, but how good are they actually? The Iron Snail And I want to compare it to what we’re seeing today, which is luxury versions of the same jacket. I have a $1,500 jacket – I didn’t pay that much for it, well it’s at $1,300. I’m wearing it right now, which is probably considered to be the greatest interpretation of the N1 deck jacket in history. It is by Dehen 1920, and it is a legendary jacket. I got it for an insane deal on eBay. Thank you, Patrick. It’s like taking candy from a baby. This is kind of the king until I got a message from a brand called Heat Strap, and they said, “Hey, you have to try ours out.” It weighs 7 lb, probably double the weight of the Dehen jacket, and I just got it. It can honestly stand on its own, and I didn’t precariously place it on anything. It’s just that big of a jacket. How warm is it, actually?   The Iron Snail Back to Maine: Let’s Talk Real McCoy’s The Iron Snail What’s poppin’ everybody? It’s young Mikey back with another article. I am still in Maine, and I live here. I hope everybody’s doing well. Quickly, I have the Real McCoy’s N1 deck jacket, which was loaned to me by Standard and Strange – a very cool shop selling peculiar and oddity clothing. The reason we needed this specific N1 deck jacket, which could have been probably Buzz Rickson as well, is because The Real McCoy’s and Buzz Rickson make some of the most period-accurate pieces that you can possibly get. The Iron Snail We’re looking for that pile because it’s a very specialty pile – it is 50% alpaca, 50% wool, and it’s supposed to have magical wearing properties. The pile on the Dehen jacket is mutton, and it’s three times higher than what we’re seeing on The Real McCoy’s and the Buzz Rickson’s jacket. So, is it still the same warmth because of the alpaca? The Science Behind My Sketchy Testing Method The Iron Snail So, you already know about my rudimentary thermal testing station, but let me explain the actual methodology behind it. And know that it’s – don’t take these numbers to heart. There is a huge margin for error, and hopefully, it’s not huge enough to totally throw out the results here, but still, there is. Either way, the rudimentary thermal testing kit is as follows: The Iron Snail The first thing you need is an infrared thermometer. The second thing you’ll need is a reptile heating pad. My girlfriend Taylor kept trying to steal it and put her feet on top of it. I placed a heating pad on the ground and put a little temperature gauge on it to let a machine know how hot it should be heated up to. That temperature was 98.6 degrees. Then I placed a jacket on top of it and saw how long it took to heat to 98.6 degrees, and then took the temperature of the outside of the jacket after 5 minutes, 10 minutes, and 15 minutes and took the averages and got some numbers. The Iron Snail The jacket temperature without the heating pad that I tested a few times in a few different locations was 66°. After the heating pad was placed under it for 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 20 minutes, and so on and so forth, the average temperature was 81°, meaning there was a change of 15° on the outside. The lower that number, the better insulator the jacket is. Temperature Change Comparison Table Product Key Features Material Warmth Performance Unique Details Dehen 1920 N1 Deck Jacket Legendary design, well-balanced warmth Alpaca-wool blend, fleece lining Third place in warmth test (11° change) Highly durable, luxury interpretation Heat Strap N1 Deck Jacket Double-lined pockets, quilted wool batting 24 oz canvas, wool insulation Warmest in the test (10° change) 2.5x heavier outer material than Dehen 1920 The Real McCoy’s N1 Deck Jacket Authentic WWII design, long storm cuffs 50% alpaca, 50% wool pile Change of 13° in warmth test Period-accurate craftsmanship Levi’s Sherpa Jacket (1990s) Classic sherpa lining, denim outer Denim with sherpa lining Second to last in warmth test (13° change) Simple design, nostalgic piece Pt 1. How And Why The N1 Replaced Everything The Iron Snail So the huge question that everybody’s been asking me constantly – they won’t leave me alone, people coming up to my door: “Excuse me, sir, why did they switch from the pea coat to the N1 deck jacket?” The pea coat is very beautiful, but it’s incredibly heavy, and it’s hard to maneuver compared to something like the N1 deck jacket. It’s hard to put on, it’s hard to take off, and it’s just stiff – although you do look like a million bucks in it. The Iron Snail So, the US Navy bids adieu to their pea coat. Instead, they made the deck zip jacket. It was based on the US Army’s combat winter jacket (I might be getting the name not perfect), but it was based on that because people in the Army really liked their jackets – they were nice and warm, and they basically had a pea coat fabric inside of them. But when you were on the cold seas, the jacket didn’t really make the cut because it had a lot of issues. One of the biggest issues that Navy personnel were facing was that they were either getting trapped inside of their jacket or trapped outside of their jacket – both of those not good. The immediate problem was that if you’re getting covered with salt spray, the salt spray freezes in your zipper, and you can’t zip it up, or you can’t unzip it afterward if you need to take it off if you’re overheating. The Iron Snail The second thing is the base of World War II zippers was brass, and they corroded in salt water, and when they were getting sprayed, they broke, which obviously sucks for the person that is wearing the jacket and wants to be warm or take the jacket off ’cause they’re too warm. But at the same time, if you’re the US military, you’re thinking, “Wow, this is very expensive – we have a lot of jackets that need to be repaired constantly because they’re all breaking.” The Iron Snail So, the main thing that the Navy tackled first was the zipper. So they said, “Okay, who, what profession wears big gloves, has a big coat, and needs to put it on and take it off very quickly?” Accountants! Weirdly enough, accountants in the 1940s wore huge accounting jackets and also leather accounting gloves while they did your taxes, and on the side of them, so they could take them off quickly and easily when they were done with your taxes, they put hooks on the side. The Iron Snail So the US Navy said, “Hey accountants, can we borrow that technology?” and they said, “Absolutely!” So, the US Navy made the deck hook jacket, which is an interesting system because typically, you have a jacket and two pieces of fabric, both sides of the jacket secured by a zipper. The deck jacket worked like this: you had fabric on this side in a C-shape and fabric on this side that was just kind of a flat shape, and they came together so your jacket could resist the elements. They secured all of that with those accounting hooks up on the side. This version of the jacket was good but still not 100% perfect. It’s just because there’s still metal on the outside, so you still have the same base issue. Also, there were some other problems with the jacket. One of them was the exposed storm cuffs, which were getting caught on things that sailors were trying to move and stuff, so that would also rip the jacket, be inconvenient, and be very dangerous as well. Also, did I do that thing where I say accountant again instead of firefighter? It happens all the time – you would not believe who I called when my fire alarm went off! Pt. 2 Breaking Down The N1 The Iron Snail So the US Navy looked at the zip jacket, the hook jacket, and they said, “Okay, got it. We know what works now.” So, the first thing that we need to focus on is the fabric of the N1 deck jacket. Grosgrain is the category Bedford cord falls into. There’s also jungle cloth because jungle cloth is a type of Bedford cord – they’re all kind of like classification systems, they’re all kind of cousins, I guess I should say that’s a little bit better way of putting it. The Iron Snail Essentially, what you can do is think of a plain weave – it’s just very boring, it’s very plain, that’s why it’s called that, just up and down, very easy-going, chill. Think of the Grosgrain family as basically a plain weave (it depends on the specific fabric we’re talking about, of course), but instead of both yarns being the same size, one is a big beefy daddy one. So when it goes over, it creates an actual rib, and sometimes you could add more yarns to make it thicker and stuff like that, but that thicker yarn is what gives us a lot of texture and a lot more durability. And by having a lot of those yarns very close together, we get a very tough, beefy fabric. Pt. 3 Armoring Up The Jacket The Iron Snail So there are two main things that we need to fix: number one, storm cuffs are still getting caught on everything. It’s also great along the hem – we have all of this knit fabric that will keep the cold air from coming in, but it’s kind of getting destroyed at all times. The Iron Snail So the first thing we can do with the storm cuffs is simply pull the fabric over the storm cuffs and extend that fabric so they’re protected, but they’re still there keeping the cold out. The second thing, though, was the closure system. The answer was never a one-system closure system. What I really like about this update again is that you could see how the designers were thinking. The first two times, they were thinking, “What is that one solution that will fix it?” but the third time, they thought to themselves, “Perhaps instead of there being one fix-all solution, we need to break the solution up.” The Iron Snail So we have the zipper that closes the jacket, but then we need to protect the zipper with a placket on the outside, and that placket cannot be secured with metal, or else it will corrode, and it’s harder to repair. It can be secured with a button, and if a button pops off, we can sew it back on – easy peasy, it’s gone, it’s done, it’s fixed. The zip jacket and the deck jacket basically had a pea coat fabric inside of them. But not really. It’s not pea coat fabric because it’s very heavily brushed by these big metal hooks that pull the fabric out, and they make it fluffy because when it’s fluffy, you have better insulation properties. The Iron Snail A big encompassing thing of all of this is the loft. So you can brush a woven fabric and get some decent loft – think of like a flannel. Or you can do what you see on sweatshirts a lot is you have a terry, you burst all of those loops, and it fluffs up and makes a fleece. Or you can use an animal skin that has fur on it, AKA mutton, and you have a fleece there. And finally, you can do what they’re doing on the Real McCoy’s deck jacket, which is sliver knitting. The Iron Snail With sliver knitting, essentially picture someone knitting like a very, very tight fabric, like a t-shirt fabric, for example, and as those loops are being formed and pulled, someone is on the side shoving little fibers into them – sliver, shoving them in there. As the loop tightens, it grabs around that sliver, and when you put that all together, and you do that a lot, that t-shirt fabric has all these things coming out of it, and bing bang boom, that is a pile. That’s what you’re seeing on the Real McCoy’s, and you can see there’s usually mesh backing that stabilizes everything. The Iron Snail You may have noticed that alpaca is getting, I feel like, more and more popular every day. It’s in t-shirts, it’s in pants, it’s in jackets, it’s everywhere for a bunch of different reasons, but the big reason that we’re focusing on today and the main reason is that it’s an incredible insulator. There are two things you really need to focus on with fibers when we’re talking about pure insulation properties: one, how fine is the fiber, and two, is it hollow? Alpaca is fine and hollow, so it’s very, very warm, which means that your coat, your jacket, or whatever it may be can be warmer without a lot of added weight. Pt. 4 The Monster N1 The Iron Snail I think it’s time we transition to the big mama – the Heat Strap’s N1 deck jacket (their interpretation of it). The big thing that you need to know is that the pockets are double-lined – there is lining inside of the pockets and on the jacket. I can feel the heat; it’s a classic Heat Strap build. I look like I could tackle a truck right now! This is a 24 oz canvas, so that is 2 and a half times heavier canvas on the outer than the Dehen. The Iron Snail I will say it feels a lot warmer, and I think that’s because the inside, instead of being just the fleece fabric that’s inside Dehen (nothing wrong with that; I was very warm all day), is a quilted wool batting. So we have a little bit more loft, and it’s a slightly different build. Okay, so this final section is really just a bunch of cool little rapid-fire fun facts that I think you would like because I really like them: The Iron Snail The first one is that I think Iron Heart might be the only brand that does this intentionally – some brands may do it by accident with fusing or something – but they have an interliner on their jacket, a very tightly woven fabric between the outer body fabric and the actual insulation layer on the inside to further stop the wind. That’s what we (The Iron Snail) are doing with The Mammoth – they were using another layer of wool in between so you get more warmth. The Iron Snail As I was saying before, the N1 was an entire system. The deck jacket is just what got really popular, but there were big pants that had suspenders on them and everything like that. I think there was also a bib as well. Those loops were placed on your shoulders and at your hips so you could secure the suspenders to your jacket so they wouldn’t fall down as you were running around. Also, your pants had little flaps that you could wrap around the inside loops. From my research, that is the best I could find. It was very hard to find an exact answer to that. Okay, so bing bang boom, put everything together, and the birth of an icon is here – the N1 deck jacket! Everybody loves it, and nylon gets really popular, and the US Navy is like, “Oh, we’ll just use that!” Pt. 5 The Warmth Championship! The Iron Snail And finally, the warmth championship! What is the warmest jacket that I have worn today? Obviously, it’s one from Fjallraven. We have an even bigger jacket from Fjallraven, but the change in temperature outside of the jacket when I put the reptile heater in (this is why I need a water bottle) was basically nothing. It basically didn’t change at all. The Iron Snail In second place, oh no, sorry, second to last place – I wanted to test something that wasn’t an N1 deck jacket just in case you wanted different suggestions, so I tested a ’90s Levi’s Sherpa jacket that I gave to Taylor when I first met her in college, and I wrote her a little love note on the inside which she still has – how cute is that? Either way, the Levi’s denim Sherpa jacket was actually warmer than The Real McCoy’s jacket by just two degrees, so again, it’s still within the margin of error. The Iron Snail That being said, there is something we need to touch on at the end, but before that, Dehen 1920 comes in third to last. Dehen’s change in temperature was 11°, and then finally, the warmest jacket that we tested today was Heat Strap’s – they came in with 10°. In reality, the big thing that matters is the actual design of the jacket with the materials being used, so The Real McCoy’s is warmer than the Levi’s Sherpa jacket just because of the storm cuffs alone – it’s longer, it seals out the wind, there’s a bunch of different factors. Watch This Review Wrapping It Up (Got Hot Chocolate Waiting) Okie dokie, that is just about my time, so I’m going to go home and have a big cup of hot chocolate. Either way, ta ta! This article was adapted from Michael Kristy’s video on The Iron Snail, with edits from FashionBeans, and was reviewed by Michael to ensure the integrity of his original content. Watch the full video here. The Iron Snail is a men’s fashion vlog (and now article series!) starring a young man named Michael and featuring a snail no bigger than a quarter. The two are set on taking over the world of fashion by creating a clothing line to end all clothing lines. Until then, we’re here to tell you EVERYTHING you need to know about the best clothing out there, from the highest quality raw denim jeans to the warmest jackets to the sturdiest boots…the Iron Snail has got you covered. Source link

[chilimili212]

We independently evaluate all recommended products and services. Any products or services put forward appear in no particular order. if you click on links we provide, we may receive compensation. The Iron Snail The Big Question: Why Ditch the Pea Coat? The lining on the coat we’re talking about today is 50% wool and 50% alpaca. So riddle me this: why does the world’s largest and most powerful navy during the world’s largest and deadliest war switch to this little guy from their woolen fortress of a coat that we all know and love – the pea coat? What gives? This fabric is pretty sick, and it sucks that we don’t really use it anymore in the 21st century, but it had a very weird job. One of the jobs obviously was to protect you, keep the wind out, and stuff like that, but the other job was to make sure that you didn’t get trapped inside your jacket if you were covered with freezing salt water all day. The Iron Snail I made a rudimentary thermal testing system so we can check just how warm this museum-grade replica of a World War II Navy deck jacket actually is. What was the US Navy outfitting their Navy Personnel in the wettest, wildest, coldest, craziest conditions out there? I’m curious. The true question is: how good was the N1 deck jacket actually? People goo-goo gaga about this in modern days – everybody who wears big heavy boots and heavy jeans has one of these jackets. I have three now, so I’m no better, but how good are they actually? The Iron Snail And I want to compare it to what we’re seeing today, which is luxury versions of the same jacket. I have a $1,500 jacket – I didn’t pay that much for it, well it’s at $1,300. I’m wearing it right now, which is probably considered to be the greatest interpretation of the N1 deck jacket in history. It is by Dehen 1920, and it is a legendary jacket. I got it for an insane deal on eBay. Thank you, Patrick. It’s like taking candy from a baby. This is kind of the king until I got a message from a brand called Heat Strap, and they said, “Hey, you have to try ours out.” It weighs 7 lb, probably double the weight of the Dehen jacket, and I just got it. It can honestly stand on its own, and I didn’t precariously place it on anything. It’s just that big of a jacket. How warm is it, actually?   The Iron Snail Back to Maine: Let’s Talk Real McCoy’s The Iron Snail What’s poppin’ everybody? It’s young Mikey back with another article. I am still in Maine, and I live here. I hope everybody’s doing well. Quickly, I have the Real McCoy’s N1 deck jacket, which was loaned to me by Standard and Strange – a very cool shop selling peculiar and oddity clothing. The reason we needed this specific N1 deck jacket, which could have been probably Buzz Rickson as well, is because The Real McCoy’s and Buzz Rickson make some of the most period-accurate pieces that you can possibly get. The Iron Snail We’re looking for that pile because it’s a very specialty pile – it is 50% alpaca, 50% wool, and it’s supposed to have magical wearing properties. The pile on the Dehen jacket is mutton, and it’s three times higher than what we’re seeing on The Real McCoy’s and the Buzz Rickson’s jacket. So, is it still the same warmth because of the alpaca? The Science Behind My Sketchy Testing Method The Iron Snail So, you already know about my rudimentary thermal testing station, but let me explain the actual methodology behind it. And know that it’s – don’t take these numbers to heart. There is a huge margin for error, and hopefully, it’s not huge enough to totally throw out the results here, but still, there is. Either way, the rudimentary thermal testing kit is as follows: The Iron Snail The first thing you need is an infrared thermometer. The second thing you’ll need is a reptile heating pad. My girlfriend Taylor kept trying to steal it and put her feet on top of it. I placed a heating pad on the ground and put a little temperature gauge on it to let a machine know how hot it should be heated up to. That temperature was 98.6 degrees. Then I placed a jacket on top of it and saw how long it took to heat to 98.6 degrees, and then took the temperature of the outside of the jacket after 5 minutes, 10 minutes, and 15 minutes and took the averages and got some numbers. The Iron Snail The jacket temperature without the heating pad that I tested a few times in a few different locations was 66°. After the heating pad was placed under it for 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 20 minutes, and so on and so forth, the average temperature was 81°, meaning there was a change of 15° on the outside. The lower that number, the better insulator the jacket is. Temperature Change Comparison Table Product Key Features Material Warmth Performance Unique Details Dehen 1920 N1 Deck Jacket Legendary design, well-balanced warmth Alpaca-wool blend, fleece lining Third place in warmth test (11° change) Highly durable, luxury interpretation Heat Strap N1 Deck Jacket Double-lined pockets, quilted wool batting 24 oz canvas, wool insulation Warmest in the test (10° change) 2.5x heavier outer material than Dehen 1920 The Real McCoy’s N1 Deck Jacket Authentic WWII design, long storm cuffs 50% alpaca, 50% wool pile Change of 13° in warmth test Period-accurate craftsmanship Levi’s Sherpa Jacket (1990s) Classic sherpa lining, denim outer Denim with sherpa lining Second to last in warmth test (13° change) Simple design, nostalgic piece Pt 1. How And Why The N1 Replaced Everything The Iron Snail So the huge question that everybody’s been asking me constantly – they won’t leave me alone, people coming up to my door: “Excuse me, sir, why did they switch from the pea coat to the N1 deck jacket?” The pea coat is very beautiful, but it’s incredibly heavy, and it’s hard to maneuver compared to something like the N1 deck jacket. It’s hard to put on, it’s hard to take off, and it’s just stiff – although you do look like a million bucks in it. The Iron Snail So, the US Navy bids adieu to their pea coat. Instead, they made the deck zip jacket. It was based on the US Army’s combat winter jacket (I might be getting the name not perfect), but it was based on that because people in the Army really liked their jackets – they were nice and warm, and they basically had a pea coat fabric inside of them. But when you were on the cold seas, the jacket didn’t really make the cut because it had a lot of issues. One of the biggest issues that Navy personnel were facing was that they were either getting trapped inside of their jacket or trapped outside of their jacket – both of those not good. The immediate problem was that if you’re getting covered with salt spray, the salt spray freezes in your zipper, and you can’t zip it up, or you can’t unzip it afterward if you need to take it off if you’re overheating. The Iron Snail The second thing is the base of World War II zippers was brass, and they corroded in salt water, and when they were getting sprayed, they broke, which obviously sucks for the person that is wearing the jacket and wants to be warm or take the jacket off ’cause they’re too warm. But at the same time, if you’re the US military, you’re thinking, “Wow, this is very expensive – we have a lot of jackets that need to be repaired constantly because they’re all breaking.” The Iron Snail So, the main thing that the Navy tackled first was the zipper. So they said, “Okay, who, what profession wears big gloves, has a big coat, and needs to put it on and take it off very quickly?” Accountants! Weirdly enough, accountants in the 1940s wore huge accounting jackets and also leather accounting gloves while they did your taxes, and on the side of them, so they could take them off quickly and easily when they were done with your taxes, they put hooks on the side. The Iron Snail So the US Navy said, “Hey accountants, can we borrow that technology?” and they said, “Absolutely!” So, the US Navy made the deck hook jacket, which is an interesting system because typically, you have a jacket and two pieces of fabric, both sides of the jacket secured by a zipper. The deck jacket worked like this: you had fabric on this side in a C-shape and fabric on this side that was just kind of a flat shape, and they came together so your jacket could resist the elements. They secured all of that with those accounting hooks up on the side. This version of the jacket was good but still not 100% perfect. It’s just because there’s still metal on the outside, so you still have the same base issue. Also, there were some other problems with the jacket. One of them was the exposed storm cuffs, which were getting caught on things that sailors were trying to move and stuff, so that would also rip the jacket, be inconvenient, and be very dangerous as well. Also, did I do that thing where I say accountant again instead of firefighter? It happens all the time – you would not believe who I called when my fire alarm went off! Pt. 2 Breaking Down The N1 The Iron Snail So the US Navy looked at the zip jacket, the hook jacket, and they said, “Okay, got it. We know what works now.” So, the first thing that we need to focus on is the fabric of the N1 deck jacket. Grosgrain is the category Bedford cord falls into. There’s also jungle cloth because jungle cloth is a type of Bedford cord – they’re all kind of like classification systems, they’re all kind of cousins, I guess I should say that’s a little bit better way of putting it. The Iron Snail Essentially, what you can do is think of a plain weave – it’s just very boring, it’s very plain, that’s why it’s called that, just up and down, very easy-going, chill. Think of the Grosgrain family as basically a plain weave (it depends on the specific fabric we’re talking about, of course), but instead of both yarns being the same size, one is a big beefy daddy one. So when it goes over, it creates an actual rib, and sometimes you could add more yarns to make it thicker and stuff like that, but that thicker yarn is what gives us a lot of texture and a lot more durability. And by having a lot of those yarns very close together, we get a very tough, beefy fabric. Pt. 3 Armoring Up The Jacket The Iron Snail So there are two main things that we need to fix: number one, storm cuffs are still getting caught on everything. It’s also great along the hem – we have all of this knit fabric that will keep the cold air from coming in, but it’s kind of getting destroyed at all times. The Iron Snail So the first thing we can do with the storm cuffs is simply pull the fabric over the storm cuffs and extend that fabric so they’re protected, but they’re still there keeping the cold out. The second thing, though, was the closure system. The answer was never a one-system closure system. What I really like about this update again is that you could see how the designers were thinking. The first two times, they were thinking, “What is that one solution that will fix it?” but the third time, they thought to themselves, “Perhaps instead of there being one fix-all solution, we need to break the solution up.” The Iron Snail So we have the zipper that closes the jacket, but then we need to protect the zipper with a placket on the outside, and that placket cannot be secured with metal, or else it will corrode, and it’s harder to repair. It can be secured with a button, and if a button pops off, we can sew it back on – easy peasy, it’s gone, it’s done, it’s fixed. The zip jacket and the deck jacket basically had a pea coat fabric inside of them. But not really. It’s not pea coat fabric because it’s very heavily brushed by these big metal hooks that pull the fabric out, and they make it fluffy because when it’s fluffy, you have better insulation properties. The Iron Snail A big encompassing thing of all of this is the loft. So you can brush a woven fabric and get some decent loft – think of like a flannel. Or you can do what you see on sweatshirts a lot is you have a terry, you burst all of those loops, and it fluffs up and makes a fleece. Or you can use an animal skin that has fur on it, AKA mutton, and you have a fleece there. And finally, you can do what they’re doing on the Real McCoy’s deck jacket, which is sliver knitting. The Iron Snail With sliver knitting, essentially picture someone knitting like a very, very tight fabric, like a t-shirt fabric, for example, and as those loops are being formed and pulled, someone is on the side shoving little fibers into them – sliver, shoving them in there. As the loop tightens, it grabs around that sliver, and when you put that all together, and you do that a lot, that t-shirt fabric has all these things coming out of it, and bing bang boom, that is a pile. That’s what you’re seeing on the Real McCoy’s, and you can see there’s usually mesh backing that stabilizes everything. The Iron Snail You may have noticed that alpaca is getting, I feel like, more and more popular every day. It’s in t-shirts, it’s in pants, it’s in jackets, it’s everywhere for a bunch of different reasons, but the big reason that we’re focusing on today and the main reason is that it’s an incredible insulator. There are two things you really need to focus on with fibers when we’re talking about pure insulation properties: one, how fine is the fiber, and two, is it hollow? Alpaca is fine and hollow, so it’s very, very warm, which means that your coat, your jacket, or whatever it may be can be warmer without a lot of added weight. Pt. 4 The Monster N1 The Iron Snail I think it’s time we transition to the big mama – the Heat Strap’s N1 deck jacket (their interpretation of it). The big thing that you need to know is that the pockets are double-lined – there is lining inside of the pockets and on the jacket. I can feel the heat; it’s a classic Heat Strap build. I look like I could tackle a truck right now! This is a 24 oz canvas, so that is 2 and a half times heavier canvas on the outer than the Dehen. The Iron Snail I will say it feels a lot warmer, and I think that’s because the inside, instead of being just the fleece fabric that’s inside Dehen (nothing wrong with that; I was very warm all day), is a quilted wool batting. So we have a little bit more loft, and it’s a slightly different build. Okay, so this final section is really just a bunch of cool little rapid-fire fun facts that I think you would like because I really like them: The Iron Snail The first one is that I think Iron Heart might be the only brand that does this intentionally – some brands may do it by accident with fusing or something – but they have an interliner on their jacket, a very tightly woven fabric between the outer body fabric and the actual insulation layer on the inside to further stop the wind. That’s what we (The Iron Snail) are doing with The Mammoth – they were using another layer of wool in between so you get more warmth. The Iron Snail As I was saying before, the N1 was an entire system. The deck jacket is just what got really popular, but there were big pants that had suspenders on them and everything like that. I think there was also a bib as well. Those loops were placed on your shoulders and at your hips so you could secure the suspenders to your jacket so they wouldn’t fall down as you were running around. Also, your pants had little flaps that you could wrap around the inside loops. From my research, that is the best I could find. It was very hard to find an exact answer to that. Okay, so bing bang boom, put everything together, and the birth of an icon is here – the N1 deck jacket! Everybody loves it, and nylon gets really popular, and the US Navy is like, “Oh, we’ll just use that!” Pt. 5 The Warmth Championship! The Iron Snail And finally, the warmth championship! What is the warmest jacket that I have worn today? Obviously, it’s one from Fjallraven. We have an even bigger jacket from Fjallraven, but the change in temperature outside of the jacket when I put the reptile heater in (this is why I need a water bottle) was basically nothing. It basically didn’t change at all. The Iron Snail In second place, oh no, sorry, second to last place – I wanted to test something that wasn’t an N1 deck jacket just in case you wanted different suggestions, so I tested a ’90s Levi’s Sherpa jacket that I gave to Taylor when I first met her in college, and I wrote her a little love note on the inside which she still has – how cute is that? Either way, the Levi’s denim Sherpa jacket was actually warmer than The Real McCoy’s jacket by just two degrees, so again, it’s still within the margin of error. The Iron Snail That being said, there is something we need to touch on at the end, but before that, Dehen 1920 comes in third to last. Dehen’s change in temperature was 11°, and then finally, the warmest jacket that we tested today was Heat Strap’s – they came in with 10°. In reality, the big thing that matters is the actual design of the jacket with the materials being used, so The Real McCoy’s is warmer than the Levi’s Sherpa jacket just because of the storm cuffs alone – it’s longer, it seals out the wind, there’s a bunch of different factors. Watch This Review Wrapping It Up (Got Hot Chocolate Waiting) Okie dokie, that is just about my time, so I’m going to go home and have a big cup of hot chocolate. Either way, ta ta! This article was adapted from Michael Kristy’s video on The Iron Snail, with edits from FashionBeans, and was reviewed by Michael to ensure the integrity of his original content. Watch the full video here. The Iron Snail is a men’s fashion vlog (and now article series!) starring a young man named Michael and featuring a snail no bigger than a quarter. The two are set on taking over the world of fashion by creating a clothing line to end all clothing lines. Until then, we’re here to tell you EVERYTHING you need to know about the best clothing out there, from the highest quality raw denim jeans to the warmest jackets to the sturdiest boots…the Iron Snail has got you covered. Source link

[thinkingabout-girls]

Dumb poll cause I’m bored

[feverhalo]

ANYWAY i went and watched a  movie in theatres rather than doing my homework, proceeded to get back and fix some junky dollarstore thown together decor I fucked up like 2 days into having it, and now im super tired and still havent done my homework

i thought I’d be better this semester but uuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[running2reanimation]

Illness

Caring comes in many forms.

King scrunched his face up as he felt the light hit it, rolling over to waking. But the the soft whine that followed had his eyes shooting open.

Gold was standing in his bedroom door, clutching his blanket. Now that King was awake, he could smell it before Gold even said it, “I threw up.”

King looked at the clock; he’d only been asleep for two hours. Oh well, time to get moving now.

First order of business, stripping Gold’s bed and pyjamas and putting them in the wash and cleaning Gold’s floor while convincing the feverish Gold to rest on the couch.

Once that was cleaned up, it was time to take his son’s temperature. Gold whined about it, curling away from the thermometer, “Come on now, under your tongue, there you go sunshine.”

Well, that was definitely high, but not dangerously so. Not rush him to the hospital high. King shuffled his way to the medicine cabinet and pulled out the fever suppressant and something to settle Gold’s stomach.

He read and double checked both bottles before measuring out the doses, two tablets and a glass of water.

“Here you go, yes both of them, no not at the same time if you don’t want to, down the hatch,” King steadied Gold’s shaking hand and helped him tilt the glass to his lips.

“There we go, good job,” King soothed, settling Gold back onto the couch, “Try and get some more rest, alright?”

And he could hear the washer come to a stop, so off he went to move the laundry along while his son slipped in and out of fevered dreams.

At least it was first thing in the morning and not midday, making calls and getting the day off wouldn’t be too much of a hassle. Of course he’d do what he could at home, so the day wouldn’t be a total waste.

Not that taking care of his sick son was a wasted day.

He still hadn’t had a cup of coffee yet. At least that explained the growing headache.

By the time the sun was up, Gold’s bedding was dry and King remade the bed and scooped up the now deeply asleep child - who was soon to be too big to pick up - and tucked him in.

King placed a bucket next to the bed and a glass of water on the nightstand, just in case.

Gold slept most of the morning, crawling out of bed to sit at the kitchen table, “‘M hungry and out of water.”

“Okay, well, I want to check your temperature again, but you’re looking a lot better than earlier,” King got the thermometer again, and Gold was a lot better about taking it this time.

Definitely going down, but still a little warm, “How’s your stomach doing? You said you were hungry, how about some toast and a banana?”

Gold nodded and King went to work toasting up two slices of bread and cutting up a banana, “Don’t force yourself to eat it all.”

He managed to finish one slice of toast and few bites of banana, to which King nodded in approval before giving Gold another dose of medicine and sending him back to bed.

King ate the remaining toast and banana and considered that his lunch.

When King went to check up on Gold later, he found his son sitting up in bed, playing one of his video games, eyes bright and alert, “You look like you’re feeling better.”

“A lot,” Gold nodded as King laid a hand on his forehead. No longer felt feverish, that was good.

“How does supper sound, nothing big, maybe some fried rice?”

“Sounds good!”

“Good,” King let out a breath and felt himself finally start to relax from where he’d been tense all day.

——

King arched an eyebrow as Purple marched from his room, bedding in arms, to the laundry room, “Purple?”

“Just a minute,” Came the all too quiet response; once the washer was going Purple joined him in the kitchen, “Sorry, I was just a little bit sick this morning, don’t worry I’ve got it cleaned up-”

“Have you checked your temperature yet?” King chided, already getting up to fetch the thermometer from the cupboard.

“C’mon Baba, do I have to? It’s just a normal stomach bug…”

“Humour me, please?” With a whine, Purple stuck the thermometer under his tongue.

“Okay, so it’s a little high, but it’s not dangerous ‘rush me to the hospital’ high. Don’t worry about it Baba, I’ve got this. I’ve been sick like this before, I know how to take care of myself,” Purple reassured, swaying as he stood up on trembling legs.

“Okay. I’ll try, but worried is one of my default states these days. I do have some medicine if you would like to take some.”

“I… yeah, think I would. Up in the medicine cupboard, yeah?” Purple asked swinging the cupboard door open.

“Let me get that for you, I think you’re too short to reach,” King reached up and grabbed the two bottles of medicine.

“You’ve got to stop being so tall.”

“Unfortunately, it’s a curse I must bear for the rest of my life.”

Purple measured out the pills, swallowing them dry and making King cringe, “You should probably have some water.”

“Once the medicine starts kicking in and I’m sure it’ll stay down,” Purple nodded, moving to go back to the laundry room since the washer stopped.

“I’ve got it, you go lay down in my bed for now and get some more rest.”

“But-”

“Purple, go rest. Please.”

“Fine, but only because you said please.”

—

King hadn’t really been in Purple’s room before, he wasn’t expecting it to be so sparse as he made the teen’s bed. A few purple things and a cherry blossom bonsai, no books or anything.

He’d have to get Purple some more things to help make his room more homey.

And now that the bed was made he scooped up up Purple - who was definitely too big for him to carry like that - and tucked him in with a bucket and a glass of water for the bedside.

Purple woke up not too long afterwards and headed to the kitchen, “Making some toast and applesauce, if you want some.”

“No thanks, do you want any help?”

“I got it, thanks,” Purple’s tone was a little snippy, but he caught himself pretty quick, “Sorry.”

“It’s alright, you’re not feeling well.”

“I am not,” Purple agreed, munching on his single piece of toast, “Gonna take some more medicine and head back to bed to ride this out.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

[thefanficmonster]

Hi!:D Can I request Connor Walsh and Wes Gibbins taking care of there’s gf/s/o when she/they has a really bad fever?

Hi dear! Sure thing! Enjoy the headcanons 💕 (PS: Reader is gender neutral because I wrote it in second POV)

Connor Walsh

He knew something was wrong when he came home to find you there, lying on the couch and 'watching' some cheesy rom-com

Yeah, not exactly 'watching' considering you were in no state to keep your eyes open for too long, leaving you half-asleep

The hot and cold flashes knocked you down a few notches in class, but when the weakness in your limbs also kicked in, you had to excuse yourself and return home several hour early

You foolishly thought it would pass without any need for a doctor visit or medication but were quickly proven wrong when you felt nothing except worse

Hell, you barely heard Connor entering the apartment but still wanted to go greet him with a hug like he would greet you

Problem is, you couldn't even sit up without a cold shiver running up your spine

And he, of course, wasn't blind to any of these details of your oncoming flu

He'd be such a mother about it though

A thermometer's in your mouth because you know it and he's already preparing a cold tower for your forehead

All done while he scolds you for not dressing for the weather and kicking the blankets off yourself in the middle of the night

Some time during his rant, you even had the audacity to say, 'Jeez, ok, mom.' Which only prompted him to get more irritated

But you knew it was a side effect of his mother hen personality - he was so worried about you he couldn't even pick a single way to express it

Further proof of this is that once he made sure you took a fever defusing pill, had enough liquid in your system and were comfortable, he finally let out a sigh of relief and kneeled down by the bed to finally ask you what you wanted

Although he already knew

"Cuddles, angel?"

"Yes, please"

Now you were both 'watching' the rom-com for approximately ten minutes before you both drifted off to sleep

Wes Gibbins

Wes had called you on his way out of Annalise's office to double check if you wanted to meet up at his place or yours for your movie date that Friday night

You'd told him that you had to cancel because you didn't want him exposing himself to whatever bug you had

Surprisingly enough, he was agreeing on the phone and didn't try to argue with you about it like you had thought he would but instead you agreed on a time to reschedule the date once you got better

What you didn't know is that, after the two of you hung up the call, he hopped on his bike and rode off straight to a pharmacy then a store to buy the typical 'get better soon' starter pack with some extra items

He heard how out of it you sounded over the phone, drowsy and tired and unlike your usual self one bit

He would've been damned if he didn't stop by to see you, probably wouldn't have been able to sleep that night either

But then again, he's come to realize that he's gotten so used to sleeping with you in his arms, he has trouble sleeping alone

So, truth be told, you weren't all that surprised to find him knocking on your door barely twenty minutes after the two of you spoke on the phone

The date still took place but with a twist to it which turned Wes into a nurse and you a patient who wasn't allowed to complain about any of the treatments without sounding like a hypocrite, for every time he has been sick you've been hella bossy with him

But you'd be lying if you said you did want to complain

It felt like a little vacation if you could overlook the medication and the symptoms of your fever

But what really made it perfect was when he slipped under the covers with you, despite your protests and warnings that he too would get sick

"So what? If I do we'll be stuck home together. Doesn't that sound just wonderful?" He asked, kissing your cheek as his arms engulfed you in a safe, warm embrace

"Guess it wouldn't be bad..." You mused, stealing another kiss from him before you could slip into some much needed slumber

[ahmementos]

Hazards of The Job

I'm not sure if I'll manage all the prompts as real life kinda went wild, but I'll still write some for the rest of the month on a pick and choose basis.

Febuwhump Day 11 : Fever

Happy Ending On Ao3

You didn’t just have a fever, not in Leon’s line of work.  It was worse than a typical person googling their symptoms on WebMD.  You had to figure out when the last time you had a dangerous mission was.  You had to double and triple check your body for cuts or abrasions that looked infected in the worst way possible the doctors might have missed.  If you had a fever, you had to report it to work so their doctors could run a multitude of tests.  

When you already had a prior infection inside you, it sent you down a never ending spiral of dread and anxiety.  Your mind plays tricks on you.  You start to remember every pain you had when infected.  You cross reference the aches and pains you currently have with the ones you had over a decade ago that were as fresh as remembering what you did or didn’t have for breakfast.  

When you hear the front door to the apartment open up, you dread giving Chris that key.  “It’s a fever,” Leon groaned, too weak to do much else from his position on the bed.  “Get the fuck out.”

“You have been at a desk doing paperwork for a week and before that it was training at the on-site range.”  Chris brought in two bags of food that contained what looked to be soup containers.  “It is probably the flu that’s going around at work.”

“Got my flu shot,” Leon mumbled against his pillow.

“And we both know that shit doesn’t always stop it from happening.”  Chris grabbed the thermometer from the nightstand.  “Open up.”  

Leon didn’t fight the order.

“Don’t let that fall,” Chris added as he pulled out what was very clearly soup from one of the bags.  “If you turn into a zombie, I’ll shoot you, okay?”

Leon rolled his eyes; obviously taking his temperature was a tactic to shut him up, not that he had the energy to really sass him back anyway.

The electronic beep told Chris the temp was taken and he pulled the thermometer away and stared at the numbers.  “What was it earlier?”

“102.”

Chris nodded.  “It’s 100.9 now.  Our lines of infection to worry about run upwards to 104.”  He sat down on the bed and smoothed his hand against Leon’s warm skin.  “Unfortunately for you and your death wish, you just might live.”

“Fuck you,” he mumbled but allowed Chris to help him sit up against pillows.  “I feel like shit.”

“It’s a pretty bad flu this year.”  He dipped the spoon into the container and moved the soup closer to Leon’s mouth.  “You have to eat.”

Leon stared at the soup and the moving contents slithering in and out of the broth.  “It’s moving.”  He looked up at the drooling monstrosity that was definitely not Chris and was too weak to move.  “Jesus fucking Christ…”

*

“Leon, wake up!”  

The feeling of Chris’ hands on his shoulders jolted him back to consciousness.  “Fuck,” was all he could get out before he had to lean away from Chris and vomit.  Black liquid splashed against the broken cement he’d been sitting down on.  It may have been blood but the darkness of the abandoned sewer entrance made it all seem black.  Knowing his luck, it was black, which meant the infection had progressed to a dangerous point.

“Are you still you?”  Chris gestured to his side at the soldier who had a gun trained on Leon’s forehead to make him stand down.  

“Just kill me.”  It was jarring to be in one place then suddenly meet the glaring reminder that you were actually infected while on duty and waiting on an antivirus that might not even work.  They’d vacated the lab and found a sewer tunnel entrance just beyond the facility to keep Leon secure while a cure was located.  

Second time in a row, too, and Leon wasn’t sure his luck was going to hold for a second miracle.  Did he want to die?  No, but he also didn’t want to become the job, either.

The soldier lowered the weapon.  “Yeah, that’s Kennedy.”

Chris might have growled under his breath before he started removing enough of Leon’s jacket to have access to his shoulder.  “I told you,” he said softly.  “You aren’t dying today, damn it.”

Leon was sure he looked amazing, black liquid already drying against his lips and his hair plastered from sweat against his forehead.  “I was looking forward to it.”  He didn’t wince when the injection burned through his body; the fever cooking him from the inside out decided the antivirus just felt like a slight tickle.  

“Now we wait.”  Chris gestured for the soldier to guard outside the perimeter.  “I told you if it doesn’t work, I’ll handle it.  Go guard the entrance.”

“Yes sir.”  

Leon didn’t watch the soldier leave but the heavy boots signaled his departure.  Gravel shuffled in cadence with footfalls retreating outside the broken down sewer entrance they’d bunkered down in.  It left the suffocating presence of Chris Redfield’s overwhelming guilt and possible looming loss.  “I’m sorry.”

“Shut up, Leon.”  Chris had his handgun out but his other hand was holding Leon’s.  “You’re going to be fine.”

“I don’t want to be another loss you shut down over.”  Leon couldn’t bring himself to look at him.  He couldn’t stand to see those puppy dog eyes.  He didn’t want to recognize that impending dread lining Chris’ face.  “I can do it myself.”

“No one is doing anything right now.”  Chris didn’t outright sound defeated, but he sounded uncharacteristically quiet.

Leon’s fingers attempted to grip Chris’ hand tighter but he could only manage a light squeeze.  “This isn’t your fault, Chris.”  

They both knew he was going to blame himself, regardless of the outcome.  

“Just put a barricade up and go finish the mission.”  Leon tried to sit up and fell against the bricks for his efforts.  “I’ll either be recovering when you get done or I’ll need to be put down when you get back.”

“Mission is being handled.”  Chris tried to reach out and help him sit up but Leon shook his head.  

“Without the commanding officer.”  Leon swallowed down bile; he refused to vomit a second time with Chris sitting there.

Chris nodded.  “They can handle it.”

“You can’t handle this though.”  Leon managed to turn his head and finally looked at Chris.  “I don’t know if I can handle having to look you in the eyes if you have to put me down.”

“I can’t handle leaving you here, worrying out there if you are even going to be you when I get back.”

Leon forced his other hand to rest on top of Chris’.  “You’re an idiot.”

Chris almost seemed to relax at the insult.  “I love you, too, asshole.”

[ethereousdelirious]

Sicktember 2022: Day 14

Prompt: "I might be a teeny tiny bit sick, but it's fine"

Fandom: The G.reat G.atsby

Wordcount: 1,284

Summary: J.ay stresses himself into an illness the day he's supposed to have tea with Da.isy.

Comments: Somebody asked for this prompt with N.ick but @clear-preformance sent me a GOLDEN prompt with G.atsby, so I ended up going with that. If you notice any slips into first person, please look past them 😅😅 That's my secret to getting into Fitzgerald voice and sometimes I miss words when I swap it to third person

CW: None

Gatsby looked like a wraith among the varicolored flowers imposing upon Nick's living room, his face a beacon of white in a sea of pinks and yellows. The rain had scarcely had a chance to touch him on the short trek from his car to the doorstep, but still he shivered like he'd been soaked to the bone. Nick tried not to stare at him, fearing his expression would betray some of the pity he couldn't help feeling, but the constant motion of Jay's shuddering fluttered in Nick's peripheral vision and engaged some nervous, animal part of his brain. In fact, Gatsby's nerves seemed to be contagious, for when a barking sneeze bent him nearly double at the waist, Nick jumped and clutched his chest like a housewife confronted by a sudden mouse.

"Jay!" he said, forgetting any well-wishes in his astonishment. "You're ill!" In truth, he hadn't believed such a thing could happen. Gatsby, cool and untouchable in his pressed suits, seemed so far above such petty inconveniences as all that.

Nick bent to touch his forehead and Jay waved him away with a billowing handkerchief he'd produced from somewhere about his person. "Perhaps a bit," he admitted, sniffling, "but it's quite alright, I assure you."

"A bit!" Nick repeated incredulously. For he saw it now: no nervous tremors wracked Jay's frame, but the persistent chill of a fever that tricked brain and body alike into believing that the minor inconvenience of a warm summer rain was as brutal and serious as a sleet-storm.

He colored, or perhaps his cheeks had been that pink since his arrival and Nick had only just noticed. "It's fine," he said with conviction, and sneezed again. Rather than wait for Jay to resurface and gain another opportunity to shoo him away, Nick pressed his palm to the back of Jay's neck. He jumped and shot Nick a reproachful look, though thankfully did not seem put off by the over-familiarity.

The over-warmth of his skin jumped up to meet Nick's hand, though admittedly, he did not have much experience in nursing. "I think I ought to take your temperature," he said, casting his mind back. He was sure he had seen an old mercury thermometer about, though he had not yet had cause to use it.

Absent of permission, his fingers found their way to Gatsby's neck and felt for a pulse. He found the vein and the gentle, rapid throb. He refrained from checking it against his watch, however, fearful of what Jay might do following a reminder of Daisy's imminent presence.

Jay shivered, displacing Nick's fingers, and drew his arms around himself. "If you must," he said with dignity.

Nick poured him a glass of scotch and, by some miracle, found the thermometer sitting innocuously by his razor as though it had always been there, and the Finn conspicuously absent.

Jay had crossed his legs in Nick's absence, and drawn himself so far back in the armchair he stood a real chance of disappearing among the flowers. Pushing aside a blossom-laden branch with his arm, Nick nearly slipped the thermometer into his mouth before realizing what an overstep that would be. He handed it to Jay instead, and turned his face away to hide the flush that warmed his cheeks.

"I really am fine," Jay assured him before slipping the thermometer under his tongue.

"Thank you for humoring me," Nick said, taking a page out of his book.

They sat in silence after that, Jay rendered mute by the thermometer in his mouth, and Nick unable to find a topic upon which he might chatter to fill the space.

The knock on the door startled them both, though Jay managed to contain his reaction to a widening of the eyes that was nonetheless as expressive than Nick's whispered oath.

"Don't move," Nick told him, and spread a throw blanket over his lap on his way out.

After seeing off Daisy's chauffeur, Nick escorted her to the door but paused on the step, his back jammed hard against the knob to keep them both out of the persistent drip off the awning. She smiled at him, seemingly delighted by the strange behavior. "Well, shall we go in through the window?"

"Sorry," he said awkwardly, "it's just that my neighbor dropped by unexpectedly and he seems to have caught a chill."

"Oh?" she said coolly.

"I just didn't want to take you off-guard."

She threw her head back and laughed melodiously, exposing a flash of white teeth. "Oh, Nicky, any friend of yours is a friend of mine."

He swallowed down his reply and opened the door for her. Once inside he said loudly, for Jay's benefit, "Yes, I'd told him to come over sometime this week so we could get better acquainted. I should have mentioned that I'd have company today."

Daisy laughed again and touched his arm. "How he frets! I'm sure we'll have a lovely time."

She took his arm and Nick led her into the sitting room, relaxing a little when he saw that Jay was still there, thermometer fixed under his tongue. He'd gone glassy-eyed in Nick's absence and took a moment too long to react to the re-entry. His eyes darted to Nick, then to Daisy's, and his expression took on such a shape of longing that Nick's own heart wrenched.

"Oh!" said Daisy, not moving. "It's you!" Then she rushed over and knelt beside him, already pulling off her long gloves. "No, don't get up. Poor dear." She pressed a bare hand to his forehead and smoothed his hair back.

Nick stood with his back against the mantle, hands clasped between his body and the wall. Gatsby was no longer his charge, but he couldn't bring himself to step away. So he stood, the paralyzed voyeur, and watched Daisy flit around Jay like a dark, elegant butterfly, murmuring to him all the while. The melody of her voice was so enchanting that he hardly registered the words until the meaning touched down in gentle retrospect and he blushed to have overheard something so sweet.

"It's alright, my dear," she cooed, her long white fingers moving over his face and body. "How funny; I can't believe you're here. Like this. You planned it all, didn't you, you clever thing? I've missed you, you know. How lovely, how lovely."

Nick couldn't help but wince when Jay waved her off and sneezed, but she only laughed and blessed him."What a brute!"

"Do excuse me," Gatsby said, and the clarity of his voice was somewhat marred by congestion. "I may have overexerted myself these past few days."

"A big, strong man like you." Daisy shot Nick a look and grinned in girlish delight at this novelty. "Don't you think he ought to lie down?"

"I suppose," Nick said, considering the logistics of this. "I'll need to change my linens—"

"Heavens no, old sport," Gatsby cut him off.

"The sofa?" Daisy said diplomatically.

Nick swept a few throw pillows aside and watched Daisy hover about Gatsby's side while he transferred himself to the sofa. Spying the thermometer on the end table, Nick looked sharply at Jay, who was occupied, allowing Daisy to strip off his suit jacket and loosen his tie.

"Do you have a fever?" Nick asked.

"It's bad," Daisy said with faux-solemnity. For a moment, Nick was fooled and his heart sank, but then she smiled and cupped the back of Jay's neck with her hand.

"101," he said, "but I'm really alright."

Nick turned away so Daisy could kiss his forehead and murmur in his ear.

Embarrassed now, Nick muttered some excuse and slipped off to the kitchen to wait it out.

[zaviyar]

Vegan Mozzarella 🍕💚

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INGREDIENTS

Dough

3 cups flour (360g)

1 packet of yeast

1 tbsp sugar

1 1/2 tbsp olive oil

1 cup warm water

1/2 tsp salt

Vegan Cheese

1/2 cauliflower (375g)

3.5 tbsp tapioca flour

1 tbsp nutritional yeast

2 tsp salt

1/2-1 cup non-dairy milk, unsweetened and no flavor (I used 3/4 cup)

Pizza Sauce

3/4 cup tomato sauce

1/4 tsp garlic powder

1/4 tsp parsley

1/4 oregano

A pinch red pepper flakes

METHOD

Warm the water up to 110-115F (43-46C). I usually put it in the microwave for about 30 seconds and that is good. You can use a thermometer to check or I test it with my finger for the temperature of a very hot bath.

Pour the sugar and yeast packet into the water and set it aside for 10 minutes. The yeast will get foamy and start to smell.

Sift in 1/2 the flour and salt into a big bowl. I like to add the flour in halves so I do not add too much. Some days you may need more or less flour.

Add the olive oil and activated yeast in. Begin to gently mix. Continuously adding in the rest of the flour and mixing. The dough should look somewhat sticky.

With clean hands and a clean, floured surface begin to knead the dough. You will only knead it for about a minute. If you find the dough is too sticky add a little extra flour. If it seems too dry add a little extra water. Dough should be smooth and soft.

Form the dough into a ball. Place into an oiled bowl. Cover with a dish towel and set it aside for at least 30 minutes or until it has doubled in size.

While the dough rises, cut the cauliflower into small chunks. Boil on the stove until fork tender.

Drain the cooked cauliflower and the rest of the cheese ingredients to a high speed blender. Start with 1/2 cup of non-dairy milk and add more as needed. The less non-dairy milk you can use the better.

Blend until the mixture is extremely smooth. It should be thin but not complete liquid.

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