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everythingsinred · 3 years

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Let's Talk About NatsuMikan: Natsume (pt. 5)

I'm back on my bullshit. I decided I'd post these, once a day, four days a week. Then I'll go on breaks for the weekend to let interested readers catch up while also further writing more entries. At the time I'm posting this, for example, I'm in the process of analyzing Chapter 39. That way, it's easier for everyone to enjoy this essay. Which I hope people do.

Anyway, this can finally truly be called a ship essay, because one of our key players has FINALLY developed feelings! Going forward, Natsume's behavior will heavily feature his growing affections for Mikan. We'll be analyzing Natsume's self-preserving hesitation as well as his immediate instinct to give up any chance he has from the get-go.

Chapter Seventeen

Natsume next shows up to walk into Class B during a commotion of Mikan’s retelling of the Reo incident. The kids all gather around him now too to ask questions and press about his condition. One kid even asks if he should teach Mikan a lesson for bragging about his rescue. Mikan smiles at him, under the assumption that their shared trauma has brought them closer and maybe even made them friends, but Natsume’s response is to simply turn away and ignore her.

He’s still Natsume after all. This is the first girl he’s ever liked, and she used to be somebody he despised, so the change in feelings is probably very strange to him. He’s confused and possibly embarrassed. He doesn’t know what to say or how to act.

Can't have her getting any ideas that he's completely changed his mind about her or anything.

Most of the people that Natsume likes at the school (although that is just Ruka and Youichi… so… you know) know that he likes them. He spends time with them, is gentle with them, does things for them, and can openly say kind things to and about them. Mikan is different. He used to be her number one enemy, so all of a sudden switching gears and becoming her friend would be quite odd.

Over time, Natsume will find ways to be gentle and sweet to Mikan, but for now his crush is brand new and he doesn’t know how to act quite yet. He’d rather avoid her entirely, or pretend like nothing happened, than openly approach his new feelings.

Furthermore his behavior is always and under all circumstances inseparable from his status as Persona’s favorite and as the Black Cat. He may have some loved ones, but he keeps the number low and tries to avoid getting close to people for a reason. Naturally, nobody could ever really understand his experiences so there will always be a divide between him and the rest of his peers, but even more than that is that considering people precious turns them into targets.

Natsume has probably learned the hard way that displaying closeness and affection for his friends can have dangerous effects, so he might now think of showing that kind of affection as selfish or even cruel. Why subject somebody to something like that, merely because he has feelings for them? It’s not fair.

In either case, it’s really not that Natsume is naturally mean and cold. He just doesn’t trust his situation enough to properly act. It’s safer in every way to just pretend like nothing changed. It’s too much to deal with otherwise. But sooner rather than later, the hard thing will be staying away. Eventually, maintaining coldness with her will be almost impossible.

Chapter Eighteen

This chapter further touches on Natsume’s new-found crush and its consequences.

Class B is used to being in an environment where Natsume hates Mikan and is bothered by everything she does. He gives in to her slightly, in small ways, and it shocks his classmates. Now, it’s understandable that, even if he hadn’t developed a crush on her, he might still be softer to a girl who risked her life to save him, but it’s still odd.

Mikan recalls asking Natsume for help training her alice. She needs an offensive alice to nullify, so Iinchou or Hotaru’s would be ineffectual in training. Natsume is really the best person to ask, and, to everyone’s surprise, he actually agrees to help.

Natsume doesn't need any convincing to help her, but what did she think practicing with a fire alice would entail?

And yes it does seem like he’s only doing it to torture her, because his alice is capable of genuine bodily harm and his admirers snicker with amusement at his antics, but I can’t help but assume there’s more to it.

He doesn’t really hesitate to help. He doesn’t need convincing at all. In some ways I think he did genuinely want to help. Her alice helped save his life, after all. Why not repay the favor by using his alice to help her train? To him, there's a lot of value in her alice, so training it is beneficial in his perspective as well.

And later still, Mikan spots Natsume sitting amongst the principal students. He stands out, as an elementary student next to upperclassmen. This moment is a good introduction to the arc. His crush on Mikan only grows stronger as the festival goes on, but there’s something looming over him too--he’s different from the rest of them. He stands out so much during the festival. He’s a dangerous ability type who’s not allowed to participate while also being a principal who has to sit on the stage for the opening ceremony. That's horribly ironic, but also shows just how singled out and under the spotlight he is. It’s a huge part of why he acts the way he does, so cold and mean and distant despite his growing affections. It’s all he can do.

He may see potential for a future, but he’d be foolish to think he should be able to acquire it, because his current circumstances have not changed at all.

The chapter ends with Natsume being asked by Koko if he wants to try out the special ability class event. He’s looking towards the special ability area, and we can tell the next chapter will be fun.

Chapter Nineteen

And how!

Natsume is here to see Ruka, his best friend, but he’s also here to catch a glimpse of the girl he has a crush on.

Sumire is also there, and it’s interesting to see that Natsume hasn’t changed in his attitude around her either, even though she also helped save him. She tries to embrace him and he dodges her.

This catches some people’s attention and they start to whisper about his presence.

In the anime, this moment is a bit more potent, hearing the murmurs and seeing a darkness over the gossiping kids, but the manga still establishes that the people waiting in line are by-and-large unhappy to see him. They whisper amongst themselves, rudely asking why he’d bother to come here, but that gloom only lasts for a moment (one singular panel and then Natsume’s responding bitterness) before Mikan appears jumping over the wall, calling his name and even smiling.

It’s almost like she was waiting for him to show up, running off from her post the second she heard Natsume was there. The dark looming screentones are replaced with flowery ones, and it’s hard not to think of this as his perspective: all is gloomy and then there is Mikan. All of a sudden, after hating her for so long, he thinks of her as bright sunshine, and he must have showed up just to see her and feel nice for a change.

It's Natsume seeing Mikan through floral-filter lenses for me...

Of course, he ruins the mood. It feels almost as if he does it solely because he knows it will upset her. She was so excited to see him, and he manages to completely turn her mood from eager to angry, just the opposite of how she was able to unwittingly turn his mood from gloomy to... as close to content as he can get.

He’s okay now. He doesn’t want her getting any ideas.

Now, in my opinion, his method of bothering her could be anything and the plot would remain the same. What matters is that he wants to piss her off, and this just so happens to be the way he does it, partially because it’s intended to be funny. Mikan has to get angry at him for this chapter to progress the way it does, but his actions could have been replaced by any other irritating action and it could’ve gone the same way.

Tsubasa then appears, drawn to the sound of a loud commotion. He sees Natsume and vaguely wonders why he’s there. Everyone knows Natsume, at all grade levels, because he’s famous. For Tsubasa, whose only real knowledge of Mikan’s relationship with the kid is that he causes trouble in Class B, it would be strange to see him at the RPG.

Natsume, meanwhile, has no idea who Tsubasa is. Seeing Mikan crawl all over her senpai, seeing him easily comfort her, is something that bugs Natsume. He glares at Tsubasa, somebody whose name he doesn’t even know, and then starts leaving with Ruka.

At first, Tsubasa is confused to be treated like this, until he hugs Mikan tighter and sees both Natsume and Ruka turn in jealousy. Tsubasa gets it immediately. Thus begins a strange and tumultuous frenemy relationship between Tsubasa and Natsume, where they both begrudgingly understand each other while also irritating each other beyond belief.

Natsume is not interested in playing the game, insulting it and wondering how anyone could get hooked on it. Ultimately, it’s not even Mikan who convinces him to give it a shot; it’s Tsubasa taunting him, “then you should be able to win, no problem, right?”

Tsubasa will come to regret saying this, because the answer is yes.

The RPG is designed to be tough. Nobody has won the whole game yet. Beating one or two students is one thing, but being able to outsmart or outmaneuver the entire special ability class is a difficult feat.

Natsume agrees to play, and gets a robot cockroach as a weapon.

Tsubasa is hugging Mikan as Natsume is about to enter, and that pisses him off even more. He decides that Tsubasa will be his slave, his motive being get your hands off her. This is silly considering that just a short time ago, Natsume hated Mikan. His feelings really did a 180.

The challenges pick up in difficulty as he goes on. The first one is effortless. He doesn’t even move from where he’s standing. The mirror-alice girl just freaks out about the cockroach and sends him on his way after two seconds.

The next one is trickier, and Natsume will need to put in more effort than just standing and waiting for the cockroach to do its job. But not that much effort. He sits next to Megane, lights a fire, and waits. It’s a scorching flame, and although Megane tries to tough it out, he gives in with two seconds to spare. Natsume, a smartass, quips sarcastically that he’s sorry--he really can’t tell how hot it is. (This is not actually important or anything, it’s just interesting that Natsume is not affected by his own flames and can’t feel the heat of them. I might end up referring to this a couple times.)

With the exception of the first and last challenges, Natsume uses his alice to beat the maze; either by heating Megane up so his soul goes back into his body, or by writing with fire instead of chalk. The next challenge is the one Natsume has been waiting for and he’ll use his alice here too.

Tsubasa is shocked to find Natsume has progressed so quickly, but he proceeds with the challenge: Natsume has to touch him in thirty seconds, but it’ll be tricky ‘cause he’s held in place by his shadows. He toys with Natsume’s shadows a bit, which really pisses Natsume off. Tsubasa even apologizes nervously, even though he’s the one in control. Or he is, until Natsume uses his alice again and gets rid of the shadows.

Natsume’s anger towards Tsubasa all stems from jealousy. It’s not just that Tsubasa was hugging and comforting Mikan, it’s that he can. Natsume needs to distance himself from Mikan in order to keep her safe, and he’s aware of that right from the start, but there’s more to it. He’s busy establishing himself as an enemy to Mikan, doing things to bother her to make her angry with him, but nobody rushes to their bully for comfort, and Natsume knows this. It’s not just that Tsubasa was hugging Mikan; it’s that he feels like he will never get the chance.

And so the next and final challenge is where he gets to be selfish.

Mikan is aggravated to see him, obviously not thrilled that he was able to make it in such a short time. Her task is that he has to get her off the carpet in thirty seconds. He can’t hurt her or force her off the carpet, and because of their alice training together, he can’t use his alice on her either. (They’d apparently practiced so much that she was able to sharpen her skills significantly. Before, her alice was a wildcard and she struggled with using it, but now she’s able to use it with relative ease. That’s a lot of training in a short time, and I’m sure Natsume wasn’t upset at all the time they had to spend together as a result.)

Natsume must feel relief regarding Mikan's nullification alice. She's nullified his alice in pretty big ways already, one time to save his life. The girl he's crushing on is capable of turning off the thing that decreases his lifespan. She really is a breath of fresh air, in more ways than one, and his appreciation for her alice, even if he doesn't voice it, will only grow. This is important, but I'll talk way more about this in the other POV.

He tries the cockroach, but she’s a country girl and unaffected.

Natsume is genuinely stumped by her challenge, admitting to himself that it’s a tough one. He then comes up with a risky idea, no doubt influenced by her rescue of him when they were kidnapped by Reo. He plays sick. This act only works if Mikan falls for it and is concerned enough to jump off the carpet, but he’s a good actor on account of all the sick experience he has and she does fall for it in no time. Her being concerned was a given.

She jumps off, meaning he’s won the game, but that’s not enough of a victory for him. He acts sick until she’s closer, so he can grab her and put his arm around her. Yes, he calls her an idiot, but this is the closest he can get to a hug… for now. It doesn’t matter that she’s annoyed and dismayed that he won. All he cares about is that he got to touch her.

She jumped down. He won already, but it's not enough! (Also sorry about two pictures. If it ruins the format, oh well.)

Natsume was jealous that Tsubasa got to do something he thinks he'll never be able to, and so he got a taste of what he wanted some other, convoluted way. He gets angry that Tsubasa is so touchy, but that's only because he wishes he could be touchy too. Natsume will get bolder and bolder with his physical affection, because he will want more and more to show it. When he starts being honest about this affection, she will be more eager to return it.

Natsume is the first winner, and Tsubasa admits it was never expected for somebody to be able to pass all the challenges. Part of the appeal is that it’s an unbeatable game, but Natsume’s feelings of jealousy and spite were enough to get him over the finish line. Though perhaps knowing it's beatable but only one person could is also appealing. It's possible to pass, but very rare for somebody to be able to, so they can draw in crowds by capitalizing on kids who want to the next person to beat the game.

He gets to choose a lamp, but he has no idea which one is whose. He cheats by asking Koko to tell him which one is the right one, but he ends up picking Mikan’s, because Koko assumed that’s the one he wanted. After all--Natsume was thinking about her. Natsume is lucky that Mikan was too anguished at being a slave to care about Natsume thinking about her, but it’s interesting to know that even when he’s supposed to be angry at Tsubasa, he was only thinking of Mikan.

Chapter Twenty

This chapter’s premise is pretty simple and light: Natsume can’t think of any use for Mikan other than to follow him and Ruka around the festival and carry their stuff. They navigate the technical ability class area and even encounter Hotaru, though only for a short time because she’s quite busy.

Most importantly, their time in the technical area makes Mikan insecure. Everyone in the tech class seems to know what they want to do with their lives, with their alices being perfect for research or creation. I’ll go into more detail with this during Mikan’s essay, but it’s important to note that Mikan asks the people around her if they’re prepared for their future only to see that they all are. Hotaru, Sumire, and even Ruka all have dreams for the future, even if Ruka won’t share his. Natsume has decided to leave the conversation and we don’t hear what his dream is, which makes sense because he doesn’t have one. Natsume doesn’t think he’ll live long enough to graduate, so why even bother wasting his own time and getting his hopes up for something unattainable?

It’s then revealed that Ruka is also a triple, and Mikan can’t tell, but the mood has been soured for Ruka. His triple-star status is a touchy subject that he’s unhappy with. His star rank is representative of Natsume’s suffering and he doesn’t like talking about it. He only says that he didn’t mention it because he didn’t get it on his own talent or effort before Natsume forces Mikan to walk in another direction, claiming to be hungry.

This is literally just a scan of the TokyoPop version, which is better than the other version I see floating around.

He can tell Ruka is uncomfortable and is ready to step in so that his friend can feel better.

As a result, they end up at the cafe where Anna is working (after all, Mikan has been perfecting her puppy-dog eyes routine and I think both Ruka and Natsume are affected, even if the latter would never admit it).

Natsume takes the first bite of Anna’s hell pie, just to see a rot demon (or whatever that thing is) taunt him about the trouble his stomach will be in soon. He really doesn’t have a choice but to throw the tea over the pie. Ruka is grateful, but Mikan is outraged at how rude Natsume is acting, and even angrier when Natsume explains that the pie was horrible. She demands he apologize but Natsume simply walks away, content to be the bad guy because he saved his friends from getting food poisoning while also sparing Anna’s feelings and reputation at her cafe.

"Your stomach will writhe" is such a potent threat. I feel sick just looking at that demon/scoundrel/rot thing.

This scene has more substance than in the anime. In the episode, Natsume sees the rotten scoundrel (or WHATEVER IT IS) before he can take a bite. He tosses the tea for all their sakes and ultimately nobody is hurt. But here, in the manga, Natsume has already taken a bite. We see the missing part of the pie, the residue on the fork. Natsume is already screwed. He's going to have food poisoning from Anna's pie, and he still puts her feelings before his own. He'd rather say that the pie is terrible according to his own tastes than to let everyone around know that she made such a health-risking mistake. He drenches the pie so that Mikan and Ruka don't get food poisoning, even if it's too late for him. Natsume leaves, knowing he will look like an asshole, AND with stomach problems on top of that, but at least he's the only one who will be seriously hurt.

This is a pretty insignificant example of a trait that we have seen before with Natsume but haven't really fully explored. It's going to play a major role for the rest of the manga, because Natsume has something of a martyr complex, where he is quick to sacrifice himself because he sees little to no value in his own happiness. This is a small example, and I'm not saying it's not kind of him, but there are consequences with his line of thinking. He's fine with looking like an asshole to protect people, or giving up things he wants so someone else can have it, or blowing himself up so two girls can escape safely. Whenever there's a chance to sacrifice himself, Natsume will take it every single time.

This may seem noble or romantic or admirable but it's not healthy at all. The way he was raised (no shade to Papa Hyuuga and Kaoru but also.... tentatively side-eyeing them for putting so much responsibility on him) and the way he is now tortured by the school has put him in a position where his self esteem is horribly low. This complex of his results in suicidal tendencies, even after he falls in love with Mikan (and even exacerbated by that love). For Natsume, love is sacrifice. He simply cannot love without feeling like he has to give something up. Ideally, he would grow out of this and maybe start seriously choosing himself sometimes. It's not evil to want yourself to be happy and to choose your own well-being, even if it occasionally makes others sad or upset.

In the context of the actual story though, we have yet another glimpse of a complex that will cause a LOT of trouble down the road for Natsume and Mikan.

Conclusion

Natsume has new feelings for Mikan and is having trouble navigating them. They will cause even more trouble in the next essay. We also touched more on Natsume's self-sacrificing tendencies and how devastating they will turn out to be. These tendencies will be consistent and persistent throughout the manga in regards to NatsuMikan's relationship, and cause more problems. These problems will pop up a bit in the next part, so stay tuned!

Also, small note: I call him Ruka and not Luca because I got used to it after watching the anime and through scans and fanfics. I heard his name pronounced that way and at first thought it was a Japanese name so I simply copied the pronunciation. When I found out it was supposed to be Luca, I'd already been using Ruka for a while. I don't really want to switch to using Luca most of the time because I know people in real life named Luca/Luka and I talk enough about GA on the daily where it might feel strange to me. I use Luca sometimes when I'm talking to others who prefer it, but Ruka is what I'm used to. I hope this isn't frustrating, but understand that I pronounce Killua's name (from HxH) like "Ki-ru-a" as well and in my head "Gakuen Alice" is pronounced "Gakuen Arisu" because I pronounce things based on what I hear when watching the anime ;-; These are things I have no real desire to change because they sound right to me. I'm sorry. (Nobody has said anything or complained, and this is not a vague or anything like that! I just wanted to say that I know it's supposed to be Luca and it's not my intention to be disrespectful when I pronounce/spell it Ruka. I am fucking crazy, but I am free.)

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#gakuen alice #alice academy #hyuuga natsume #natsume hyuuga #natsumikan #sakura mikan #mikan sakura #my meta #ga #mine #ga meta #ga meta: nm #ga meta: manga #ga meta: manga nm #let's talk about natsumikan #let's talk about natsumikan: natsume #because of how jam-packed the alice festival is with nm content this might take two more parts to complete #stay patient with me please i am trying my best ;-;#i couldnt go into the haunted house knowing id only have two pics to work with. it would kill me.#theres just too much #the ten image limit is genuinely such an obstacle so if u wish there was more then blame tumblr and maybe theyll raise the limit to fifteen #they wont. tumblr is a disgusting landfill of a website.#edit for song: stupid by brendan maclean #theres some jealousy and tsundere behavior. love that for early love natsume

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queen-scribbles · 3 years

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Playing Favorites

39. holding hands in a museum to pull them to the next exhibition [AJ/Nate]

also: combo birthday fic! Late for his(Nov 4), early for hers (Nov 13)

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After a few centuries, it got hard to plan birthday dates they hadn’t done to death. It helped, a little, that they’d starting celebrating together a decade or two in. Their interests were similar, their birthdays only a week and a half apart. It was easier this way. Still, even that measure could only help so much, and it was roughly around the first century mark Abigail and Nate simply put all their favorite options on rotation. Problem solved, for the most part.

She didn’t mind; whether it was the first time or the five hundredth, spending more time with Nate was always enough for her. And, somehow, he always made it feel special. Despite that, and despite how much they both genuinely loved all the activities in the rotation, Abigail would be lying to say she didn’t have favorites. Years she looked forward to just a little more than the others.

This year was one of them. Abigail bit her lip and intertwined her fingers with Nate’s as they made their way up the museum steps in a vain effort to contain her excitement.

Nate chuckled and squeezed her hand. “Looking forward to this?”

She smiled sheepishly. “Y’ can tell?”

“You’re all but vibrating with it, ya rouhi,” he said warmly.

“You know I love museums almost as much as you do,” she said, practically skipping across the lobby, voice dropping near a whisper once inside. “B’sides, it’s been awhile since we visited this one, I’m curious what’s changed, yeah?”

“Awhile” in this case being about eighty six years.

“A lot, I imagine,” Nate said, looking around, “if not everything.”

“It’ll be like tryin’ somethin’ new while also bein’ an old favorite,” Abigail said cheerily, already excited for the new arrangement of the first room she could see into.

Nate pulled her to a stop and bent to kiss her. “That remains one of my favorite things about you, AJ,” he murmured against her lips.

“What?” she whispered back, more than a little pleasantly dizzy from the kiss.

“The way you find joy in everything.”

“So do you,” she pointed out, sliding her arms around his waist.

“I find good,” he corrected. “Or try to. You find joy.”

“Easy to do when I have you, yeah?” Abigail murmured, pushing up on her toes for another kiss. “Let’s go see what there is to see, hm?”

Nate drew in a slow breath and nodded. “Let’s.”

He left his arm draped around her shoulders as they resumed course into the nearest gallery, and Abigail smiled and leaned into him in response.

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Nate’s guess proved correct; darn near everything was new. The only exhibit still the same was the tiny alcove on local history and supernatural legend. They shared a private laugh at the touch of irony before taking a break for scones and hot drinks in the attached café.

“Y’ lookin’ forward to th’ second floor?” Abigail asked, finishing the last dregs of her coffee. “Sounds like it’s mostly one big exhibit coverin’ most of the level.”

“Mm.” Nate nodded and took another sip of his tea--he was, as usual, half a drink behind her. “I must admit, a gallery on ‘Love Everlasting’ does seem an apropos way for us to spend the day,” he said with a smile.

“It does, doesn’t it?” Abigail spun her empty cup against the table, “Interestin’ they’re doin’ an exhibit like that now. Y’d think that’s the sort of thing t’ open in February.”

“You would think.” Nate took a long drink of his tea. “Perhaps it’s tied to when they could get permission to host some of the pieces?”

“Probably.”

They sat in silence a few more minutes, enjoying each others’ company and watching the people passing by while Nate finished his tea. Once he was done, they stood, disposed of their cups, and headed up the stairs hand in hand.

The gallery entrance was just off to the left, with a small placard explaining the exhibit as a mixed media expression of loves through the ages.

“Oh, this will be fun,” Abigail murmured.

“For us, yes.” There was a smile in Nate’s voice and he squeezed her hand.

She giggled and nodded agreement. The rest of Bravo wouldn’t find it nearly as enjoyable, she was sure. “C’mon.” She tugged his hand to step into the first room of the exhibit.

This one was mostly sculptures and small tokens that had been given as signs of affection hundreds of years ago. They took their time, Nate waxing eloquent about a few that were older than Abigail but younger than him.

The next area transitioned to paintings from the sixteenth to eighteenth centuries, interspersed with large empty swaths of wall decorated by projected passages from love letters. Abigail caught the fleeting look of nostalgia on Nate’s face, even if it was there and gone in a blink. She made sure to really drag her feet through that room and Nate squeezed her hand again in silent thanks.

There were several more rooms; love through different eras, romantic traditions and courting rituals in different countries, but Abigail’s favorite was the last one.

Absolutely huge--larger than the entire building that housed the Wayhaven police department--with the walls covered in artfully arranged paintings, photographs, and the projected images of romantic couples from what looked like the 1600s all the way up to roughly present day. Some famous, some posed and professional, others amateur, candids and personal. In this one room, they drifted apart, drawn to different sections of the long walls, though the knowledge the other was somewhere nearby remained ever-present.

Abigail couldn’t help smiling when she stole a glance at Nate; he was studying the photos with relaxed enjoyment, hands slipped in his pockets and contentedness all but rolling off him. Or maybe that was something only she saw. She bit her lip and twirled a lock of hair around her finger as she turned back to the wall.

Only a little further down, she found herself pressing a hand over her mouth to hold back a laugh, then weaving her way across the room between other patrons. “Nate!” Her enthusiasm carried, even with her sotto voce tone. “Y’ hafta see this one.” She grabbed his hand and tugged him back with her, pointing out the photograph once she located it again. “There.”

Nate’s already-warm smile stretched even further and he gave a quiet chuckle. “Ah.”

The photo, dated roughly a century and a half ago on the placard, depicted a man and woman sharing a kiss under a Parisian streetlight, misty atmosphere casting them mostly in silhouette. Two dark figures, over a spray of almost ethereal foggy white, then a similarly dark background, the Paris street only dimly visible. The glint of the streetlight showed just hints of color on the two figures; dark hair and a leather jacket on the man, curly deep red hair on the woman. Any other features were obscured by shadow, anonymity lending a touch of mystery to the romantic scene.

At least, it would for other viewers. Abigail and Nate shared amused, knowing looks and linked their hands tighter.

That’s us.

I know.

“This one’s m’ favorite,” Abigail said blithely, leaning her head against his shoulder.

“I can see why it would appeal,” Nate murmured in reply, brushing a kiss against her hair. They didn’t say another word as they finished in the gallery, but Abigail couldn’t entirely wipe the amused smile from her lips. She wondered if Nate was also musing on the irony of that photo being the one in a darn museum.

A stolen moment after a mission where they almost lost two teammates and the supernaturals they were trying to save, and that’s what got captured by some random--but admittedly skilled--photographer and was hanging in a museum a hundred and fifty years later.

It was only after they’d exited the museum Nate finally spoke, his voice quiet. “That was after...”

“The Arena case,” Abigail finished. She rubbed her thumb over the back of his hand.

“Where Adam and Felix...” He grimaced and squeezed her hand. “Not my favorite case.”

“Mine, neither,” she said. “But everyone came out fine, so cheerier thoughts, birthday boy, yeah?” She leaned her head against his arm. “What was your fav’rite, then?”

Nate chuckled, pulled her to a stop by a bench so they weren’t blocking foot traffic. “You know the answer to that one, Abigail.”

She grinned and wrapped her arms around his waist, hands under his jacket for the warmth as she interlocked her fingers. “Murphy?”

He nodded, tucking her hair behind her ear. “There were parts I did not enjoy,” he acknowledged, leaning closer, “but the overall result” --he stole a tender kiss-- “is more than worth it.”

Abigail chuckled, pushing up on her toes to kiss him back. “Ditto.” Another kiss. “T’ both.”

Nate smiled and cradled the side of her face with one hand. “Happy birthday, AJ.”

“Happy birthday, Nate.”

And she kissed him again, because it was one of her favorite things to do.

#queens fic #abigail jenings #nate sewell #aj/nate #twc #otp: smiling always #ugh they're so smitten it's ridiculous #i hope felix still teases them about it daily xD #centuries down the road and they still act like the other hung the moon stars and all the planets in the darn sky #i love them

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bishreview · 3 years

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Track by Track Review - Hottest 100 2020

Wrote this article a little bit ago just for fun. Decided to post it on here with the thought of maybe getting back to the Bish Review. Also, put an asterix next to my votes (songs that made my top 10). Anyway, here we go:

100. Kool - BENEE

One of the many gems from ‘Hey u x’. Unlucky to hear her biggest hit so early on.

99. Itch - Hockey Dad

I thought ‘Brain Candy’ was a little bit of a disappointment, but Itch was one of the strongest tracks they duo have released.

98. Your Man - Joji

Surprised to hear this track in the countdown. Pretty solid tune though

97. Audacity (feat. Headie One) - Stormzy

He’s still one of the best from the UK rap scene and this track shows why.

96. Germaphobe - Hockey Dad

One of the weaker tracks, I thought, off Brain Candy, but not surprised a lot of Hockey Dad fans liked this one. Definitely plays into their audience’s taste.

95. Loose Ends (feat. G Flip) - Illy

I do not like Aussie Hip Pop. This track is not an exception.

94. Rain (feat. Tay Keith) - Aitch and AJ Tracey

The piano in this is very ‘Humble’ - Kendrick Lamar. Still a banger though.

93. Lemonade (feat. Gunna, Don Toliver and NAV) - Internet Money

Bit of a forgettable track. It’s okay, but feels like there’s a lot better like this out there.

92. These Days - Thelma Plum

First cover of the countdown. Still one of the best Hottest 100 number ones, and Thelma does it justice.

91. Charlie - Bugs

Second cover of the countdown. I do like this but I feel it doesn’t reach the same heights as the original.

90. No Time To Die - Billie Eilish

A little expected from Eilish but still a solid Bond song (the second in history to make it).

89. In Her Eyes - The Jungle Giants

I cannot wait for the new Jungle Giants album. They’ve gotten better and better with each release.

88. Heart Attack (feat. lau.ra) - BRONSON*

I fell deeply in love with this song the second I heard it. It just has this quiet yet strong emotion behind it. The production on it is something else as well.

87. Three Leaf Clover - Teenage Joans

A really solid debut single by the Unearthed High winners. Can’t wait to hear more from them.

86. Laugh Now Cry Now (feat. Lil Durk) - Drake

I still don’t get the hype for Drake. The falsetto “baby” in the chorus also never ceases to make me laugh.

85. Too Tough Terry - Dune Rats

Dunies slow descent from mature stoner pop to edgy tracks for teens has been hard to watch. This song just seems like a parody of the band.

84. Chicken Tenders - Dominic Fike

Has to be the sexiest song about the best thing in the frozen food section at the supermarket. Pity the album didn’t live up to the hype.

83. Down For You - Cosmo’s Midnight and Ruel

I was really keen for this once I heard about the collaboration between the two. Unfortunately it felt a little too much like a Ruel song and it doesn’t really feel like Cosmo’s Midnight had much of a touch on it.

82. The Clap - The Chats

It’s a bit generic for The Chats but I just like hearing them get more popular. Just hilarious dudes.

81. Weightless - Spacey Jane

One of the stronger and more unique tracks on Sunlight. The synth touches really suit the band.

80. Freaks - FISHER

Cannot wait for FISHER to just slowly fade away. His tracks all sound the same and are so basic.

79. my future - Billie Eilish

One of the best tracks Eilish has released. Love how this just turns halfway through from a really soft ballad to a bit of an electro pop song.

78. Lady Marmalade - G Flip

It’s a nice cover. The video of G Flip performing it though is really fun.

77. House Arrest - Sofi Tukker and Gorgon City

This song bangs pretty hard. I like a lot of Sofi Tukker have really been putting out some solid stuff.

76. Baby It’s You - London Grammar

This is a great track, that synth in the chorus is heavenly.

75. Photo ID - Remi Wolf

I do like this song but it reminds me of a track from the 80s or 90s and I can’t put my finger on what that track is.

74. Scream Drive Faster - LAUREL

When I first heard this I thought Ladyhawke was back in the mainstream. Little disappointed it wasn’t, but this slaps.

73. Don’t Need You - Genesis Owusu*

Possibly the best chorus of the year. Owusu has stepped up massively in the Australian Hip Hop scene.

72. Way Down - Ocean Alley

Ocean Alley have plateaued. ‘Lonely Diamond’ just felt like the band had become comfortable.

71. Obey - Bring Me The Horizon and YUNGBLUD

I just can’t take BMTH seriously anymore. They’re music has become so comically edgy.

70. Low - Chet Faker

Hey look, Nick Murphy has become Chet Faker again. Don’t know why he changes between the two when one is just slightly more soulful than the other, but he does release nice tunes.

69. Second - Hope D

I do like this female, Aussie version of Jamie T. It’s a really nice track. Also the number 69 is claimed by Hope D. haha.

68. Lie to Me - Vera Blue

I don’t know what it is exactly, but there’s something about Vera which just puts her on a different level than her counterparts. She’s just that consistently good.

67. Boss Bitch - Doja Cat

This track doesn’t get old for me. It’s so much fun, and Doja Cat owns it. Love it.

66. Fantasising - Skegss

This track really does have a very “Three Leaf Clover” vibe. I have enjoyed Skegss in the past but their new stuff hasn’t captured my attention really. Seems a bit run of the mill.

65. C’MON (feat. Travis Barker) - Amy Shark

I actually don’t mind this song, but why does it feature Travis Barker. It’s a piano ballad featuring a punk drummer, and he really doesn’t do that much. I’m confused, was he jealous of Mark Hoppus?

64. Soak Me In Bleach - The Amity Affliction

The song title reflects my thoughts when I hear that The Amity Affliction have released a new one. There are so many better Aussie metal bands out there.

63. Day & Age - Ball Park Music

BPM have a knack for writing amazing ballads. I wasn’t huge on their latest album, but tracks like this continue me having them in my good books.

62. Run - Joji

One of the best tracks Joji has released. A really mature song for the artist and a step in the right direction for him.

61. Pretty Grim - Ruby Fields

Ruby is good, but I feel she’s starting to release the same song over and over. Need something fresh.

60. Go (feat. Juice WRLD) - The Kid LAROI

Probably the strongest track by The Kid LAROI, but Juice WRLD outshines him just due to his vocal tone. He just sounds better.

59. Gimme Love - Joji

And that’s three for Joji. I really like how this song has two distinct sections and both are solid without overshadowing the other.

58. Fly Away - Tones and I

I still don’t get why Tones and I puts on that fake accent in her songs. It just detracts from what could be a nice pop song.

57. Sobercoaster - Beddy Rays

Really didn’t expect this to get so high. I’m happy though because it’s a really fun song.

56. On The Line - San Cisco

Tracks like this keep me invested in San Cisco. They can really release some brilliant stuff.

55. I Think You’re Great - Alex The Astronaut

The fine line between overly chessy and adorably optimistic is what Alex walks on with every track. I think this falls on the former side sadly.

54. Blue - Eiffel 65 (Flume Remix)

The fact that Flume puts so much of his identity into this remix is why Flume has been one of the most successful Aussie acts this past decade.

53. In Your Eyes - The Weeknd

If The Weeknd release ‘Blinding Lights’ a month later I’d believe that he would take out this countdown. He didn’t though and instead we are left with this solid track in the bottom 50.

52. The Glow - DMA’s

Why? Why did DMA’s have to get so poppy and generic. I loved their first two album, but I struggled to get through the third.

51. Your Love (Déjà Vu) - Glass Animals

Out of the three big hits the band had in 2020, this is the most underrated. There is so much going on here, yet it never feels muddled. Wavey Davey on fire here.

50. Nothing To Love About Love - Peking Duk and The Wombats

Although this is a nice song, there’s been so many 80s electro pop throwbacks recently that have been done better that this collab just fades into the background.

49. Wishing Well - Juice WRLD

This song is so beautiful and heart-breaking. Really shows why Juice WRLD became such a beloved artist so quickly.

48. Ain’t It Different (feat. AJ Tracey and Stormzy) - Headie One

This is a really cool collab. They use the Red Hot Chili Peppers sample so well and really flow so well with it that it feels almost effortless.

47. Animals - Architects

I like a lot about this track, but the chorus really hits another level. Feels cathartic to scream along to.

46. Pretty Lady - Tash Sultana

Was hoping Tash would move into a more psychedelic direction with their newer stuff, but this is still a fine track.

45. as long as you care - Ruel

A pretty by the books Ruel song, but he really does this style so well.

44. You & I - G Flip

Probably G Flips strongest release this year. The chorus has a lot of flavour.

43. together - Ziggy Alberts

Generic acoustic track by generic Byron Bay artist. He really took the cake this year for dumbest comparison, when he compared wearing a face mask to the holocaust. Thought he’d suffer a bit for it, but apparently his fanbase grew stronger.

42. WHATS POPPIN - Jack Harlow

Jack Harlow is just so much fun. He’s killing it, and WHATS POPPIN is proof of that. Keep the bangers coming Harlow.

41. I Still Dream About You - The Smith Street Band

I felt I was growing out of The Smith Street Band, their newer music just not resonating to me. Then they drop this and make me a big fan again.

40. Come & Go (with Marshmello) - Juice WRLD

Just that chorus. It is so enjoyable. He really was going places.

39. Righteous - Juice WRLD

A back to back, and from one of the more exciting songs on the album we get to one of the more sombre tracks. Everything from the guitar, the vocals, those synth notes. . . this track is just a perfect send off for the artist. R.I.P. Juice.

38. Parasite Eve - Bring Me The Horizon

This song is so unironically cringe and edgy that it somehow becomes ironically fun. It does the full circle.

37. SO DONE - The Kid LAROI

I do like The Kid LAROI, but his vocals on this, combined with the lyrics, just make him sound like a child chucking a temper tantrum. It does make me laugh though.

36. forget me too (feat. Halsey) - Machine Gun Kelly

If this song was released in the early 00s (where it belongs), it would’ve faded into oblivion. At least Halsey sounds pretty solid on her verse though.

35. Running Red Lights (feat. Rivers Cuomo & Pink Siifu) - The Avalanches*

My personal number one for the year. This song has that melancholic, nostalgic feel to it that just hits home every time. Also one of Cuomo’s strongest vocal performances.

34. Everybody Rise - Amy Shark

This song is fine. I wouldn’t go out of my way to listen to it, but it’s fun to sing-a-long to.

33. Breathe Deeper - Tame Impala

One of the best tracks from The Slow Rush. I love that piano motif throughout, and the bass is so funky. That weird bridge section towards the end is also pretty slick.

32. Criminals - DMA’s

The real criminals are the ones who told DMA’s this was a good idea. I just can’t get around their new stuff. I miss ‘Hill’s End’ and ‘For Now’.

31. Reasons - San Cisco

Tracks like this keep me from becoming a full time fan of San Cisco. They can really release some average stuff.

30. Bagi-la-m Bargan (feat. Fred Leone) - Birdz

Powerful. Birdz really took it to another level here.

29. Dribble - Sycco

Although I find there’s a lot of similar stuff out there, I think Sycco does sound like an original voice in the Australian music scene. She’s killing it.

28. Straightfaced - Spacey Jane

Although there was a lot of good stuff on Spacey Jane’s debut album, I found it to be quite repetitive. This track was one of the ones that I found to fade into the background instead of standing out.

27. Under the Thunder - Skegss

I really want to like Skegss, they’ve released some great tunes in the past. But this just doesn’t do it for me. It’s just boring.

26. No Plans To Make Plans - Lime Cordiale

Everything that makes new The Rubens tracks so average is presented here on a Lime Cordiale track. Obnoxiously quirky.

25. Reality Check Please - Lime Cordiale

Hey back to back Lime Cordiale tracks. And another one of their weaker ones. ‘Addicted to the Sunshine’ did this chorus better.

24. Blue World - Mac Miller

Didn’t expect this to make it so high but so well deserved. This song slaps hard but still continues the tragic story that is presented on his posthumous album ‘Circles’.

23. Good News - Mac Miller*

Back to back Mac! To be honest, I am close to tears every time this track plays. If only the lyrics “there's a whole lot more for me waiting/I know maybe I'm too late, I could make it there some other time/Then I'll finally discover/That it ain't that bad” were told to Mac before his passing, because he did have so much more to offer. R.I.P. Mac.

22. Complicated - Eves Karydas

This song is so good. I’ve heard it that many times but it still hasn’t lost its shine. So damn good.

21. Energy - KLP and Stace Cadet

I was really hoping this would crack top 20. Probably the best Dance track of the year. Such a jam.

20. Addicted To The Sunshine - Lime Cordiale

Despite thinking that ‘14 Steps To A Better Living’ didn’t have many new tracks that were that good on it, this one is nice. It’s just a pleasantly nice song.

19. You Should Be Sad - Halsey

I really don’t like Pop Country music but I also find it hilarious that the genre cracked the top 20. ‘09 Taylor Swift would be proud.

18. Tangerine - Glass Animals

With Tik Tok exploding in 2020 I don’t get how this didn’t get adopted by someone on it. It’s so primed to get hyped on it.

17. Is It True - Tame Impala

I think Kevin Parker’s vocals on this are underwhelming, but that might just be because the instrumental slaps that hard. The rhythm section is so tight.

16. Screw Loose - Lime Cordiale

This sound is what Lime Cordiale do best. We need more dub influence and less elevator pop influence.

15. Skin - Spacey Jane

No matter what you think about Spacey Jane, they sure do make some emotional tracks. One of the most powerful songs on Sunlight.

14. Tombstone - Ocean Alley

The verses are average and pretty bland but the chorus is amazing. Just don’t think the album resonated with me too much, and Tombstone is another mixed track off it.

13. Rockstar - Mallrat

Possibly Mallrat’s best song yet. Her laid back, relaxed style mixed with the low-fi production really meshes well.

12. Get on the Beers (feat. Dan Andrews) - Mashd N Kutcher

I’m not going to pretend this is my style, but the way this has resonated with Australians during lockdown last year makes the track way smarter than it deserves to be. It’s both ironically and unironically good.

11. On Our Own - Lime Cordiale

I’m happy the three best new tracks of Lime Cordiale’s debut were the highest placing in this countdown. This really is a nice song.

10. Therefore I Am - Billie Eilish

Not my favourite songs from Billie but she continues to be consistently good. The production on this is immense as well.

9. I’m Good? - Hilltop Hoods

I wish old school Hilltop could hear this so could prevent themselves every going this direction. Aussie Hip Pop is not a good genre. This is one of their worst tracks yet.

8. Sending Me Ur Loving - The Jungle Giants*

This song has so much flavour too it. It’s so funky and fun and the production is so tight. Also the guitar work is underrated here, not doing much but adding that icing on the cake.

7. Hyperfine - G Flip

Every time I hear this track (and I’ve heard it a lot) I completely forget about it a couple minutes later. G Flip is good, but this is forgettable.

6. WAP (feat. Megan Thee Stallion) - Cardi B

I understand if this isn’t your style, but I love it. I don’t think there’s ever been a song with so many quotable moments. Every line makes a statement that will get in your head. My personal favourite? “ I let him taste it, now he diabetic”.

5. Lost In Yesterday - Tame Impala

There’s a lot of songs on ‘The Slow Rush’ I like, but Lost In Yesterday I’ve always found kinda boring. It feels a little uninspired. Surprised that this was the album’s big hit.

4. Cherub - Ball Park Music*

BPM have released some great music over the decade but I think this is their best yet. It’s beautiful, emotional and has a fantastic, cathartic breakdown at the end. I love a good build up.

3. The Difference (feat. Toro y Moi) - Flume*

Everything about this track is why Flume has been so great for so long. This track is great for any situation. If I’m partying, I play it. If I’m relaxing, I play it. If I’m getting pumped up, I play it. If I’m sad, I play it. Flexibility matters.

2. Booster Seat - Spacey Jane

OHHH-OH-OHHHHHHHH AND IT FEELS LIKE THAT AGAIN! One of the best sing-a-long tracks of the year, yet massively emotional. Like damn this song is rough.

1. Heat Waves - Glass Animals*

If I had one word to express how I feel about this winning I would say “deserved”. Not many tracks were as perfect for 2020 as this one. Glass Animals love writing absolute bangers with emotional cores and this one is one of their strongest tracks. Glass Animals just continue to outdo themselves.

That’s it for now, gonna maybe start posting again. I dunno. See how I feel. Ta-ta.

#triple j #triple j hottest 100 #2020 #triple j hottest 100 2020 #Glass Animals #spacey jane #flume #Ball Park Music #tame impala #cardi b #g flip #the jungle giants #hilltop hoods #billie eilish

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bestintheparsec · 4 years

Note

For your requests, how about from the 100 ways to say “I love you” list—39. Don’t cry. and 89. Stay there. I’m coming to get you. for Javi? Maybe when Reader goes alone after a suspicious suspect and ends up in a tricky situation, and something bad’s happened or she’s afraid something bad WILL happen so she calls Javi in a panic and he’s got to comfort her. I love you angel!🤍

“Stay there. I’m coming to get you” + “Don’t cry”

Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader

Warnings: mild violence

Words: 1.4k

- I had to throw in a (completely unnecessary) little rain scene in there; only for you, Molly🥰 This got longer than a drabble, but it was fun to write and I hope you like it! I love you lots, thank you for sending this in🥺

Requests | Masterlist

Javi taps his foot in frustration while he sits at his desk. What would it take for these people to take potential hits seriously? He lights a cigarette and shakes his head. He looks across his desk at Murphy’s empty chair. You and Murphy had stumbled upon information that revealed where a key sicario would be tonight. As usual, the higher-ups doubted the credibility—and legality—of your source. After a bit of bickering, the three of you were sent off with a warning and specific directions against pursuing this lead.

It’s been hours now, and without much to do here, Murphy headed home early. You had left even before then, muttering something about never being able to get anything done.

Javier’s not expecting it to be anything interesting when he answers the phone.

“Javi?” you breathe. Your voice shakes.

He can immediately sense something is off. “What’s wrong?” He puts the papers he’s holding down on the desk. He hears a mix of static and the loud background music of the bar on your end.

“I—I’m sorry,” you mutter.

“For what—” he starts, before it clicks in his head. “Fuck. Did you go against Messina’s orders?” He sits up straighter and rubs his eyebrows. “Did you go alone?”

“I had to,” you answer hurriedly. You try to keep your voice low. “I found him. The informant wasn’t lying.”

“Then what’s the problem?” he asks, impatiently. More static.

“I…I think he knows something’s up. I think he’s got backup. I can’t tell.” Javier hears a small gasp on your end, followed by some loud voices in the background.

“Do not go back inside,” Javi instructs, but there’s static and he can’t hear your response. “Stay there. I’m coming to get you.”

“Did you hear what I just said?” Javier repeats when you don’t answer and the noises get louder.

“Javi, I wanted to say—” you start, but you’re interrupted by something.

“I have to go,” you whisper before the line goes dead. Javier swears under his breath. He pictures you scared, and he doesn’t like it. He’s only seen that look a handful of times, and he hates that he’s not there with you now. Only because you’re his partner. He would worry just as much about Murphy, Javi reasons with himself.

Fuck, he whispers. Why hadn’t you called Murphy first? He was the one who found the informant. He quickly punches in Murphy’s number and fills him in, telling him to meet at the bar. He can’t tell anyone else—all of your jobs would be on the line if they found out you went against orders. Javier puts out his cigarette and pulls his gun from the drawer, slamming it shut before hurrying out.

You’re on the grimy floor in the hallway by the bathroom. You force yourself to sit up; your head throbs when you do. Your lip is split and you can taste the metallic blood every time you speak. The sicario stands in front of you, hovering. As suspected, he did have backup, who was now standing guard in front of the hall.

He’d disarmed you before you had the chance to run. The bystanders in the bar had known better than to interfere. You thought he was going to kill you right there in front of those people—for some reason, he didn’t. You want to believe it’s because he saw the DEA badge; but you don’t expect these bastards to be afraid of much. Which means he wants something from you, and he’s going to take it at whatever cost.

He squats down to your level, quiet for a second before he grins and grabs you by the neck, slamming you into the wall.

“I asked you a question, puta,” he enunciates slowly, “who told you I’d be here?” He snarls, his disgusting breath in your face.

You look him in the eyes, noting all the scratch marks you’d left on his face.

You’re still fully conscious, and blink a few times before you spit in his face. “I’m not telling you anything,”you attempt to growl. But these men know the look of fear like the back of their hands, and he can sense it on you.

“Have it your way,” he remarks calmly. He stands up, pulling you by the shoulders. He smiles again before his fist pounds across your face and you fall to the ground again. He kicks you hard in the stomach and you let out a gasp. You try to sit up once again and watch him reach for his gun, pointing it at you. You don’t have time to process your thoughts, when abruptly, you hear a gun shot ring out. Then a few more. You wince, keeping your eyes shut.

You let out a cry and flinch when something touches you, but when you open your eyes all you see is Javi, Steve, and the sicario’s body next to you on the floor, blood spilling onto the tile. Despite the scene, Javier’s expression is all concern. Steve runs his hands through his hair and exhales.

Javi kneels down in front of you and takes in your appearance; blood from your nose is starting to dry and your lip is also bleeding, but you’re otherwise unharmed. He closes his eyes and sighs in relief.

“Are you alright?” he asks. “Is anything broken?” Unexpectedly, he reaches out and touches your arm, his fingers lingering on your skin for a few moments. The tender gesture takes you by surprise.

“No,” you sputter. “Just a few hits, some ice will be enough.” You look over toward the guard’s body on the floor next to Steve. “You got here just in time.”

Javi chuckles without humor and looks at Steve, then back at you. “Are you sure we don’t need to take you to the hospital?”

“Yeah. I’ll be fine.”

He tells Steve to go get the car. He gives you another once-over, his brows furrowed. Without a word, he scoops you up in his arms and stands.

“I think I can walk, Javier,” you say, your lips curling into a tiny smile.

“Yeah, well, you also thought you should come here alone, cariño.” He uses the term jokingly, but your heart still flutters. “Please don’t try to bust a sicario on your own again. At least tell me before,” he teases.

He looks at you questioningly when he sees you frown.

“I’m sorry,” you say for the second time tonight. “For putting you in danger. And thank you, really.” Out of nowhere, you feel your eyes start to water as you process the events. You’d foolishly risked their jobs as well as your own; on top of that, you’d put them in harm’s way, too.

“Don’t cry,” he says, his voice gentle. “I’m surprised we didn’t all do the same, honestly. Since when do we follow the rules?” he smirks.

You suddenly become very aware of the fact that Javi hasn’t moved anywhere, and you’re still just casually in his arms. You blush at how ridiculous you must look and break eye contact, much to his amusement.

“Let’s get you home,” he says, and walks out to the exit past the police who’ve just arrived. It’s dark and drizzling outside, the droplets washing some of the salty taste of blood off your lips.

He spots Murphy’s car and heads towards it. “I hope you know I’m going to come next door and check in on you for a while,” he comments. You look up at him. His hair is weighed down by the rain, and the expression in his eyes when he looks at you is…soft.

“It’s a busted lip and some bruising, Peña,” you answer. “Not a concussion.”

He knows this, of course. But he’s afraid to say something he regrets, so he doesn’t say anything else.

He opens the car door, and you lean into him before he puts you down.

“Javi? I wanted to tell you—”

“Shh,” he interrupts, carefully setting you down in the backseat. He pushes a rain-plastered section of your hair behind your ears. For a split second, there’s a sign of hurt in his eyes. “You…don’t need to. You’re not on your death bed.” He wipes away at the droplets on his face and closes the door before walking to the other side.

He’s right, you think. Maybe some other time.

Perm tags: @immundusspiritu @aeryntheofficial @i-like-those-odds @heyy-honeyy @haildoodles-writing @hiscyarika @taman-a @electricprincess888 @jensfolly @spacegayofficial @myrin1234 @aloneontheoutside @pascalisthepunkest @ah-callie @fleurdemiel145 @katialvi @murdermewithbooks @pisss-offf-ghostt @kayebede @lamnothome @fan-g0rl @lokiaddicted @mrsdaamneron @poedaneron @wolfshifter4life @rociomz @opheliaelysia @dyn-djarin @randomness501

#Javier Peña #Javier Peña x reader #narcos #my ff #man I'm really straying from my usual brand of Angst lol #drabbles

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bird-in-a-cage · 4 years

Note

Found the ones with the horniest vibes for me! 39, 62, 103, 114, 127, 149. You know e x a c t l y what I want bby 😌😏 -CockAsInTheBird

Hi bby!

As one of my biggest supporters, and with how many prompts you gave me, you’re getting two fills. For the first one, well, you’ll see. Hope you enjoy!

Also a quick thank you to everyone who has sent in a little request so far. It means the world to me. I’m slowly making my way through them all and will get to each one in time. Having a full time job really does take up vaulable writing hours let me tell you. There’s still plenty of prompts available from the list here, or if you wanna just spin me your own ideas that’s totally okay too. My ask box is always open.

#62 - It’s okay, they’re he’s gone now. #149 I just want to look at you

2k | dead dove do not eat | murder ahoy.

Part I is here

Serial Killer AU Part II

“If you could kill anyone, who would it be?” Steve asked casually, passing back the shared cigarette, smoke filling the air between them like barely there fog. Billy was laying down, plaid sheets bunched around his middle, looking up at a popcorn ceiling, shaggy brunette hair and dangerously calm amber eyes. Billy took what was left of the cigarette and inhaled slowly, but he didn’t have to think of an answer. He knew. Had known for years, if given the chance, who he would kill without a second thought. Had spent nights thinking about it over and over again.

“My dad.”

Those dangerous eyes twinkled in the dark, the only light coming from a lamp sitting on the nightstand, casting the room in a too bright orange glow. A smirk started to grow on Steve’s face, half hidden by shadows, the wheels starting to turn. He shifted, sank more under the sheets from his sitting position up against the headboard until he was on his side, propped up by an elbow, reached across the small space and thumbed Billy’s jaw tenderly like a lover would. It was little touches that pulled Billy more under his spell, little soft words here and there. Affirmations he was doing something good for the first time in his life.

He was good. After all this time.

“I think that sounds like a fun date night, don’t you?” Steve’s hand crept up to hold Billy’s cheek, cupping it softly, brushing his fingers over the bone underneath, tracing his skull like that’s all Steve could see. Was all he was interested in. “And you were so helpful with my little Hagan problem, I think you deserve it.”

Tommy had been three days ago. Billy drove. That’s what he did now. Drove Steve around wherever he wanted to go. Helped whenever he needed it. Mostly loading and unloading. Holding people down. Being the muscle. Keeping people quiet. Making sure their eyes were open. Steve liked that. Liked people watching him work. Liked to see the will to fight turn limp and tearful upon realisation.

Tommy never locked his door. Never had apparently. Steve had been in his house many times. Knew exactly where to find him, knew his mom was working out of town for a week after a little reconnaissance. Steve was still the town’s darling after all. Tommy put up more of a fight than most. Almost got away if Billy didn’t stop him at the door. Because he did that now too. Kept watch. Kept watch for cops and onlookers. Nosey neighbours. Made sure no one got away. No possible loose ends that would need to be tied up.

He'd looked up at Billy so betrayed.

Steve stabbed Tommy fourteen times in the kitchen of the Hagan house. One for every year they had been friends. The last one was in the heart, so powerful Billy heard a rib crack from the other side of the room.

Disobeying the King had broken Steve’s heart. So he had to break Tommy's in return.

Blood was everywhere. Steve was covered in it as he panted over Tommy’s body, choking and gurgling on the last few moments of life. Looking up at them both helplessly, like maybe this was just a nightmare and he'd wake up soon. Steve waited until all was silent, got to his feet and set the knife on the kitchen table, regained his composure and swept his hair back with a bloody hand and a deep sigh. During the act he looked manic. Possessed by pure evil. Eyes wild and crazy. Unblinking. Not missing a single moment of his own handiwork.

“I don’t want Mrs Hagan to find this, she was always nice to me," he said calmly, eyes never leaving Tommy’s body. It was an order without the words.

Clean this up.

So Billy did, without question. Grabbed rubber marigolds and bleach from under the sink and scrubbed and scrubbed until the kitchen was sparkling again. Tommy was rolled up into a bedsheet and dumped like old luggage in the trunk of the BMW. Billy drove them out to the outskirts of town when it was nearly dawn, a little side road Steve had picked out especially. He liked to display. What he was doing was art at the most carnal level.

"We used to come here when he was wanting to experiment," he explained calmly, like he wasn't propping up the body of his former friend against a rock for a hiker to stumble across on their morning trail. "Wasn't gay if it was out of town. It's not gay if you don't take it Stevie."

Billy had just smoked. Kept the engine running for the headlights and watched. He could have ended everything right there. Crushed the maniac under the wheels and ran. Someone would surely believe his story. He was innocent. But he didn't. He just stood and smoked. Waited.

Internally, he'd been trying to convince himself this was all for self preservation. Billy knew he was on Steve's imaginary list. He had to have been. Everyone else had been picked off and there wasn't a single hope he wasn't next. But Steve never said a word about it. Never gave off a look or an attitude that he was even contemplating it. He gave Billy smiles and compliments, reassurances that everything was okay, Billy was good at this, that he needed Billy's help, couldn’t do it without him. And something deep deep down clung to those kind, blood soaked words.

Billy had never been told he was good before. Always a bad kid, a troublemaker, only fit for a chain gang. Even in elementary school. Good grades but a poor attitude. Constantly in the way of everyone's good time, fit for nothing. So many times he'd heard his father's rage towards him, both in front of and behind his back. Cruel words snarled like Billy was nothing but an old dog that just wouldn't die. Didn’t fit in with the new family. A ghost from the past.

Steve told him he was good. Almost constantly. And he’d never really liked Tommy that much anyway.

With how those dark eyes glittered in the dark of Steve's room, looking directly into Billy's very soul, calling to him like a siren in the middle of a storm, a date night sounded like a great idea.

***

Max and Susan were away for the weekend. Billy remembered it being on the family calendar pinned to the wall by the door the last time he was home. The day of Nancy. Written in bold black ink and circled three times. They were visiting some aunt or cousin or whatever. Billy hadn't really been paying attention to the conversation other than when the phrase 'boy's weekend' innocently left Susan's lips and Billy's very core turned the ice at the thought of there being absolutely no barrier between him and his father’s rage for three whole days.

A lot had changed since then.

For as much as Billy detested his father, he knew his routine. An ex military man. Always kept impeccable timing. It had gotten Billy in trouble more than once. Being a minute late for curfew and having to spend the night freezing in his car, shivering under a leather jacket and not much else.

He could feel Steve practically vibrating with excitement in the passenger seat as Billy cut the engine pulling up to Cherry Lane. He squeezed Billy's thigh firm but tender. Reassuring but serious.

Don’t back out now.

"You ready for this stud?"

Billy could only nod looking up at the house and what he knew what inside. It was late and a Saturday night. Neil would be passed out on the couch in front of whatever movie was on tv, half drunk on warm beer if Billy wasn’t there to be the punching bag.

He wasn't scared. Wasn't really thinking about the consequences of all of this. This was revenge now. Payback. For years of abuse both mental and physical. For being beaten down and made to feel lower than dirt. For every foul word and sharp backhand. For every dinnerless evening and night alone willing himself not to sob into a pillow because boys don't cry William. For being made and twisted into a creature that was now beyond human, beyond all control, but Steve understood.

They shared the same soul, the same creature. It rattled around them deep inside. Jerked and pulled and warped and swelled and became unstoppable. Billy just needed someone to unlock the cage. Steve had the key that fit perfectly.

Billy squeezed Steve's hand before they left the car. Billy still had keys even though he hadn't been home in close to a month. No one came looking for him. He didn't expect them to. He very well could have been dead in a ditch the way the body count was growing and the cops were being incompetent. But it all just added fuel to the fire.

The entire time Steve's grin was delicious. That same manic look back in his eyes that was always there when they did this. Like a shark when there was blood in the water. It made Billy’s heart flutter. For this one they swapped places. Managed to get the surprise swoop and have Neil pinned with a hand over his mouth before he could properly register what was happening. Before he could spit one last drop of venom in Billy's direction.

Steve had given him back his switchblade. A present for being so loyal and helpful. A sign of trust that it would never be used on himself. Billy twisted it into his father's neck with no remorse. Buried the blade so deep it hit bone. The gush and waterfall of blood was warm on them both. Billy stepped back from it to watch realisation and anger and then abject hopelessness wash through steely eyes that had been nothing but cruel his whole life. Steve laughed. Cackled towards the ceiling, biting his lip like a schoolgirl. Made sure to get blood on his hands like he was washing them under a wild spring. Billy felt some drip off his cheek, stain his shirt as he just panted, heart hammering in his chest and thrumming through his bones as Neil was let go to twitch and die on the carpet. Finally gone.

Steve took Billy's head in his hands gently, cupping his jaw and thumbing up to his cheeks. Everything was slick and warm. Spreading blood everywhere that had been clean. Marking his teritory.

"Oh baby, I just wanna look at you, I'm so proud of you!" Steve spoke comfortingly. Like a mother would after their kid won a third grade spelling bee. His eyes sparkled like diamonds. He was genuinely proud of what Billy had done. And that made Billy warm inside. Emotions mixed and twisted as it sunk in what Billy had done. He was crying a few solitary tears before he knew it, but they were gently brushed away by caressing thumbs.

"Hey, hey its okay, he’s gone now" Steve cooed. "The first is always the hardest. Especially if it's family."

That had been Steve's first. His own father. He'd confessed one night in bed, both of them sweaty and hard. Like talking about this kind of thing was a turn on. It certainly was for Steve. Made him hard as a rock. He muttered his sins into the back of Billy's neck as he fucked into his protege so vigorously the headboard slammed off the wall and threatened to snap. Scraping his teeth over tanned skin as he let memories fly. About how he'd poisoned his father and just watched him convulce on the hallway floor. Just watched as the man begged for help but received nothing but the cold eyes of his own sixteen year old son.

He always came hard to that story, knuckles white, fingers digging into Billy’s hips and leaving bruises for days.

Billy tucked his head into Steve's neck, wrapped his arms around the thinner waist and let himself be held in return. Let himself be kissed. Let himself taste copper pennies and iron and smoke and spearmint gum from an hour before. And excitement. Let himself be pushed up against the wall of the hallway he'd walked through countless times and feel his partner hard against his hip. Let thighs slot together and bodies start rutting. Both running on adrenaline and excitement as a slain monster lay defeated on the floor. No longer part of the story. Groans being eaten. Hair being pulled. Bodies running tighter and tighter until the inevitable conclusion and cum soaked denim aftermath.

Steve panted warm against Billy’s temple, lips stained and swollen. Before this would have never been allowed. Never ever. Now Billy was free. Unchained. Knew deep in his heart and his head he would follow Steve to the ends of the earth as thanks for this wonderful gift. Words would never be able to describe how grateful he was.

It was the best day of his life.

#harringrove #my writing #serial killer au #billy x steve #dead dove do not eat #tw: murder #tw: blood #tw: horror #tw: gore

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kayliemusing · 3 years

Text

1: Name - Kaylie

2: Age - 23

3: 3 Fears - Spiders, failure, loss

4: 3 things I love - Reading, writing, Taylor Swift

5: 4 turns on - Kindness, nice hands, humor, someone who has a really warm heart.

6: 4 turns off - Arrogance, moustaches lmao, narcissism, basket ball shorts *shudders*

7: My best friend - Her name is Megan (but also my mom lmao)

8: Sexual orientation - Heterosexual

9: My best first date - I have never been on a date.

10: How tall am I - 5'2

11: What do I miss - My childhood mostly

12: What time were I born - 2:45 pm

13: Favorite color - Red, but sometimes a nice summery, pastel yellow

14: Do I have a crush - no

15: Favorite quote - I have so many that I can't say my utmost favourite, but one that I always think about is from Richard Siken "He was pointing at the moon but I was looking at his hand." I'm not even sure how this is supposed to be interpreted, but I just love the detail of this. Of someone looking at the moon and pointing at it, but you're looking at their hand because you're that consumed by them and also they're like your moon. anyway-

16: Favorite place - My house lol

17: Favorite food - Cheesecake

18: Do I use sarcasm - Yes, but very dryly

19: What am I listening to right now - Nothing actually. I'm just sitting in the quiet.

20: First thing I notice in new person - I used to think it was physical, like eyes or their smile, but I think it's actually their demeanor. i.e., confidence, if they're laid back, talkative or quiet, etc. Or even just how they handle things. Like when I'm at work and I meet a new co-worker I'm always noticing how they are with people.

21: Shoe size - 6.5 US but I can manage a 7 US too.

22: Eye color - Grey

23: Hair color - Ashy blonde, but I usually get it highlighted to be a brighter blonde

24: Favorite style of clothing - I'm super into the French girl vibe right now (elegany, classy, ribbed sweaters tucked into high waisted jeans or dress pants, a blazer thrown over and a nice gold necklace) but I'm also really into a summery boho look (flowy maxi dresses and skirts)

25: Ever done a prank call? No

27: Meaning behind my URL - On this account, it's just my name and then 'muses' because this account is just me talking to myself tbh. My main account is called autumnsletters which is just a combo of my fav things: autumn and handwritten love letters, and finally, my embarrassing taylor swift account is called sixteenavenue which is a lyric from her song I Think He Knows where she mentions her heart skipping down sixteenth avenue.

28: Favorite movie - I feel like i don't have one answer bc I always have a different answer to this question lmao. I think it's called A Christmas Carol (the 2009 version w/ Jim Carrey). It just makes me feel cozy and warm inside. Also: Clueless.

29: Favorite song - All Too Well by Taylor Swift I think.

30: Favorite band - Of Monsters and Men

31: How I feel right now - I actually feel really happy today, which is a change lol. I had an awful week last week, but over the last couple of days I've just felt more creative and happier.

32: Someone I love - My mom

33: My current relationship status - Single

34: My relationship with my parents - Excellent.

35: Favorite holiday - Christmas

36: Tattoos and piercing i have -0 :'(

37: Tattoos and piercing i want - I want to get my ears pierced again bc the holes grew over. Low key want a nose piericing and low key want a tattoo on my collarbone (or somewhere around there)

38: The reason I joined Tumblr - Because everyone else had it and I felt left out LOL

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? - I don't have an ex

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? - No

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? - No i've never been kissed rip

42: When did I last hold hands? - never but it's ok bc i can hold my own hand

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? - Depending on what I'm doing. If I showered the night before and I'm just doing a very low-maintenance look, roughly 15-20 mins. On a normal day in which I shower in the morning and am trying to actually be presentable, roughly an hour.

44: Have I shaved your legs in the past three days? - Have YOU shaved MY legs? No. Have I shaved my own? Yes

45: Where am I right now? - My room

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? - Most likely I'm not drunk, but IF I WAS, it would be my friend, my mom, or my sister (my sister would probs make fun of me and film me tho tbh)

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? - Loud if I'm jamming with nothing else to do but sing along. If I'm trying to do something, I'll turn it down bc I can't focus with loud music (especially if I'm trying to write something/talk to someone/text someone)

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? - My mom bc my dads dead

49: Am I excited for anything? - My sister and I are going to Banff in about three weeks so I'm excited for a getaway.

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? - No

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? - I work in retail so

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? - I don't know. I think I hugged my mom at some point this week lol

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? - Bye bye babyyyy

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? - my cat

55: What is something I disliked about today? - I had to go to work

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? - Taylor Alison Swift baby

57: What do I think about most? - Probably Taylor Swift.

58: What’s my strangest talent? - I can make stomach gurgling noises with my mouth closed.

59: Do I have any strange phobias? - Nah, pretty generic ones

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? - Behind the camera

61: What was the last lie I told? - Some lady asked if a product was good and I said yes so I wouldn't have to help her find another one

62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? - Neither what the hell

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? - Neither

64: Do I believe in magic? - No

65: Do I believe in luck? - No

66: What's the weather like right now? - It's calm, but a little cloudy. It was really warm and sunny earlier, but it's gotten a little grey.

67: What was the last book I've read? - I just finished this series called The Winner's Curse by Marie Rutkoski and it was so good but so stressful omg. Still 5/5 stars.

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? - Yes

69: Do I have any nicknames? - Not really, but sometimes my coworkers call my Kayls

70: What was the worst injury I've ever had? - Oh my god when I was like 10 I fell during grounders and the bar hit me right on the cooch. Most painful event of my entire life.

71: Do I spend money or save it? - Spend it bitch

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue? - No

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me? - yes!! my blanket!!

74: Favorite animal? - I love hippos and I don't know why.

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? - Reading on my phone to avoid sleeping so I could prolong not going to work

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? - Devil. Kind of like Satan The Devil is his full name

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? - Shake It Off

78: How can you win my heart? - Learning Taylor Swift's entire discography for my sake

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? - tbh I really don't know

80: What is my favorite word? - Wonderstruck

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr - n/a

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? - stream fearless taylor's version

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? - no

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? - Healing

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? - N/A

86: What is my current desktop picture? - it's a misty forest

87: Had sex? - no

88: Bought condoms? - no

89: Gotten pregnant? - no

90: Failed a class? - yes

91: Kissed a boy? - no

92: Kissed a girl? - no

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? - no but it's a dream

94: Had a job? - I've had two so far

95: Left the house without my wallet? - Yes, sometimes I do it on purpose so I can make my mom pay for something lmao (chill i'm talking something small like candy)

96: Bullied someone on the internet? - no

97: Had sex in public? - no

98: Played on a sports team? - no

99: Smoked weed? - no

100: Did drugs? - no

101: Smoked cigarettes? - no

102: Drank alcohol? - yes

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? - no

104: Been overweight? - I feel overweight, but technically no

105: Been underweight? - No

106: Been to a wedding? - Yes

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? - Yes, but not since I was younger. I'm mostly on my phone now.

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? - Oh yeah lmao

109: Been outside my home country? - No

110: Gotten my heart broken? - Yes

111: Been to a professional sports game? - No

112: Broken a bone? - No

113: Cut myself? - Yes

114: Been to prom? - Sort of. I'm Canadian so I had grad.

115: Been in airplane? - No

116: Fly by helicopter? - No

117: What concerts have I been to? - Jonas Brothers when I was about 10 lmao and Marianas Trench when I was 15

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? - No

119: Learned another language? - Tried to

120: Wore make up? - Yes. I do work at a makeup store.

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? - no

122: Had oral sex? - no

123: Dyed my hair? - not a funky color, no

124: Voted in a presidential election? - Sort of; I voted for a prime minister

125: Rode in an ambulance? - Yes

126: Had a surgery? - No

127: Met someone famous? - No

128: Stalked someone on a social network? - No

129: Peed outside? - No

130: Been fishing? - No

131: Helped with charity? - Yes

132: Been rejected by a crush? - No bc I never fessed up to any crush lol

133: Broken a mirror? - No

134: What do I want for birthday? - A jewelry box

#survey

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jean----ralphio · 4 years

Text

BoB liveblog ep 3

Feelings. I’m having them.

Episode 3: Carentan, but I’m renaming it my heart hurts because this ep is so heavy but also I’m happy cos the best thing possible happens AKA the return of Rich

00:01 THE MUSIC. UGH. WHISKEY STAT.

03:02 These men, I can’t, stop doing this to me Tom Hanks, I feel personally attacked by the pain

03:18 My husband has just informed me I shouldn’t drink while doing these liveblogs because it’s “unhealthy” and “dangerous” and “please stop drinking my whiskey and crying about Gabriel from Supernatural.” First of all, he’s fucking lucky I’m not filing for divorce. Secondly, I need to cope SOMEHOW! “Yes, but I really don’t think alcohol is the best choice as a coping mechanism.” WRONG ALCOHOL IS THE ONLY CHOICE.

03:46 Blithe! Whatcha doing baby?

03:55 Shifty! My angel son is here!

04:21 Real talk, the first thing I ever saw Marc Warren in was this hot as fuck movie with Lee Williams, I’ll google it hang on. OK it’s called ‘No night is too long’, its based off a book. Marc Warren plays this hot professor and Lee Williams is a uni student and the sex scene montage is seared in my memory forever, and there’s a kiss in elevator and it is something else. That’s all I remember when I see Marc. His character in it was super intense and kinda scary, so it’s funny to see him playing Blithe, who is baby.

05:17 Aw Shift, my little angel baby son

05:32 Perco! <3

05:41 Lieb I’ve missed you <3 Luz <3

06:11 Oh Blithe, sweetie.

06:38 Like. He’s functioning. But he’s also not functioning. Same tbh

06:58 Harrrrryyyy <3

07:18 “No talking, no smoking, and no playing grab-fanny with the guy in front of you, Luz!” Iconic.

08:01 “And another thing to remember, boys, flies spread disease! So keep yours closed!” Oh Luz, never change

08:15 Love these few seconds, the fire and the water and the silhouettes

09:11 What do you mean again! How many times have you lost them, Harry?!

09:44 Yay the husbands are here. I’ve missed them. BUT YOU KNOW WHO I MISS THE MOST? RICH. WHERE IS HE?

10:40 You’re the yokel, sweetie

10:50 It’s OK, baby Blithe!

11:02 Look, Dad and his husband are here, you’re safe

11:27 Ugh that scene

12:00 I don’t like this, Dick

12:35 “WHERE DID EVERYBODY GO!”

“I HAVE NO IDEA!”

Iconic.

12:45 Move, boys! Listen to Dad!

13:11 BABY NO DON’T TAKE YOUR HELMET OFF!

13:31 Angel son, be careful

13:45 God how do they even know where to shoot?

14:08 Shifty! I said be careful!

14:09 God he’s good

14:23 No baby!

14:40 That was boss, random dude. Tipper?

14:50 Angel son

15:01 Boys. God.

15:40 Was that necessary?

15:41 Well, it led to that boss scene for one, I guess. Iconic.

15:57 Naw, Luz had a feeling <3 And he was right!

16:08 Leave them, baby

16:46 Buck lmao

16:57 Sweetie it’s OK! Oh no, baby ☹

17:10 Roe <3

17:18 Me too, babe

17:38 Ah, Lip! Speirs, come save him!

17:53 Lol poor Lip! Oh no, not the goods!

18:01 I’m happy for you, and Speirs, lmao

18:39 Yeah, you show that outhouse, Tip. It was looking shady as fuck to be fair

18:48 Oh fuck.

18:56 This bit though, the distorted sound… fuck

19:25 Oh Lieb <3

19:35 Lieb, you always try to pretend you don’t care and that you’re badass but you’re not fooling me <3

19:44 Baby, no, wtf are you doing?

19:53 IT’S RICH! OH THANK FUCK! I’VE BEEN SO FUCKING WORRIED. I’M SO PHYSICALLY RELEIEVED LMAO

20:02 My heart

20:27 God

20:34 Where tf did you find that horse?!

20:50 You named him fat boy??

21:02 Oh, honey. I can’t make jokes. It’s a stressful time for us all, me especially, due to the lack of Rich.

21:06 Nix. No.

21:10 Husbands <3

21:14 Baby! Nix go back and help.

21:23 He’s like ugh tf I don’t have time for this! Mood

21:34 This is the first time we hear Roe speak <3

21:43 Listen to him, Dick!

21:45 Hey Buck

22:22 Lord, thank you for Shane’s face.

22:31 Roe’s like wtf you gonna do?

22:55 Baby don’t cry!

23:32 You didn’t let anyone down! It’s OK!

23:43 Oh Dick called him son, I can’t

23:57 Dad healing vibes.

24:11 Dick is legit a Dad now. Is this how the adoption process works?

24:41 Roe is like tf just happened

24:53 RICH! RICH!!!! <3

24:59 Ew

25:05 Don’t touch it, Rich, yucky.

25:21 Oh God. Terrifying.

25:22 Riiiiich, I’ve missed you so much

25:30 Speirs just wants to get back to killing ASAP

25:37 Terrifying. Pretty. But terrifying.

25:41 Mood, Penk

25:56 Riiiich <3 He looks so golden in the sunlight <3

25:58 Paused here a while. His face is beneficial to my health and well-being, OK? Also, third whiskey

26:04 RIIICCH <3 He’s such a wind up. He’s so pretty and golden! Look at his eyes and his little lock of hair and his stubble, I can’t even.

26:17 I can’t. His eyes. Even in the shade you can see they’re so pretty <3

26:36 So much Rich content. I’m so happy.

26:59 Lord. I love Rich. But Matthew is a freaking fox.

27:10 *happy sigh*

27:20 Rich’s hair is so blonde here

27:28 Rich stop throwing things at people!

27:37 Blithe is still a wee bit batshit, but he’s still the only voice of reason in this little party, which is concerning.

28:19 LMAO LUZ “Oh Jesus Christ, Frank, I don’t know, until they tell us to stop.” He’s always such a mood.

28:38 Hoob looks like he needs a bath.

29:02 Move, babies, move

29:38 That day-night transition tho

29:52 Hey Johnny

30:02 Mood

30:07 Harry. Stop. Cute.

30:30 Johnny, I’m not sure I appreciate your little “You can count on ME sir” as if Harry can’t count on Blithe! Don’t be rude.

30:33 Harry! Fucking fall on him why don’t you!

31:06 Tell that to Ross

31:34 Dad’s here

32:37 Oh Harry

32:38 “War is hell” You little shit! Iconic

33:08 Oh God

33:21 Roe <3 He got there quick! I feel like he doesn’t sleep, that he just hangs around in the back waiting to run in and save people <3

33:27 Oh, baby ☹

33:32 Blithe, it’s OK. He looks so scared!

33:55 Johnny, I have several things to say to you. Number 1, how dare you look so hot in this lighting. Number 2, don’t be so freaking lazy! Number 3, leave poor Blithe alone! He is having a Difficult Time. God Johnny is so unimpressed with him tho.

34:35 I would be more scared to run into Speirs, rather than the enemy. He is more terrifying tbh.

34:46 So. Intimidating.

34:54 Nervous? Yes, case in point.

35:01 Oh Christ here we go. Welcome to the Speirs is batshit and murder-hungry show.

35:27 Lol at Johnny suddenly waking up cos he heard gossip

35:40 Goodnight Johnny ‘Unimpressed’ Martin ILY

36:06 Don’t kill him, please

36:33 GDI Speirs

36:53 Literally no one else wants to be like that, Speirs, just you.

37:58 God

38:33 I need to see Rich. I feel like he was back in that field with Malark but I couldn’t make him out properly and I am now Upset.

38:52 Dick is so boss.

39:18 Oh, baby, oh dear

39:42 Ugh, oh no

40:02 Noooo don’t abandon Easy

40:22 Dad’s here, it’s OK

40:57 Dick get down from up there, you’ll get hit

42:08 Lol at Harry

43:18 RICH

43:48 Nix just chillin with his binoculars on his hill the whole time

44:20 Naw Rich just got back with the ammo and now the party is over

45:05 Oh

45:29 I got chills, the way he just disappears

48:11 So touching

48:46 Harry’s not happy

48:57 lol they’re all like nope, don’t make eye contact

48:58 Aw Blithe levelled up, plus 1 courage

49:00 No, not my angel son, you leave him back where it’s safe Harry

49:28 Aw, Harry’s smile <3

49:59 Nix don’t be so crass

51:00 ROE <3

51:28 Aw Harry, it’s not your fault

51:52 I love this. Harry and Dick in the shade, the boys all chillin in the sun. It feels peaceful and like they’re getting some rest, but like it’s not comfortable. Both legit because they’re lying about on rocks and rubble, and like the general mood and tension. It’s not safe yet, and the environment reflects that and this show, I can��t with this fucking masterpiece of a show sometimes I swear

52:25 “That’s why I came to France. To please General Taylor.” Another zinger from Harry! Give me one line of his that is not iconic and I will give you my firstborn

53:34 Oh Blithe <3

53:56 Aw Malark <3

54:15 Dorks

54:53 RICH

55:14 Lol at Malark stealing Rich’s cigarette

55:19 Oh Lord, the way Dick’s face falls. God, that look. Also do you two husbands need to be that close? No, but please continue.

55:27 Babe <3

55:37 Aw the Dad club assembling is never good. Fun’s over.

55:44 Laughing Rich is all I need in this world

56:00 Bill stop groping him, that’s Roe’s job

56:04 Rich <3

56:13 Aw Babe has a new friend

56:16 Rich in the background <3

56:28 Oh Lip

56:31 That’s sweet of you Smokey

56:49 Lip <3

57:02 RICH’S FACE OMG

57:25 Poor Lip, having to do this.

57:29 RICH

57:36 OMG it’s an actual woman

57:48 Good on you Malark

58:07 Cute

58:17 So sweet

58:32 Oh God, this scene. It’s actually a little surprising she’s not figuring it out on her own

58:37 Oh, his face

58:57 Scott does such a beautiful job in this scene, portraying the emotion without much dialogue, not quite meeting her eyes when he should because he’s trying to hide his shock and sadness

59:40 Oh Blithe.

In conclusion I am happy and sad. It’s a very confusing time.

#band of brothers #liveblog #rsj #this one hits right in the feels

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disgruntledkittenface · 4 years

Text

digging deeper meme

I was tagged by @homosociallyyours @runaway-train-works and @evilovesyou, thank you!! I really enjoyed reading your answers. I’ll tag @crinkle-eyed-boo @hazzabeeforlou and @uhohmorshedios!

1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or blue pen? Definitely black. My husband brings home the complimentary pens they give out at his work because they’re really good pens, and I have a whole bag of black after he accidentally got some blue ones for me.

2. Would you prefer to live in the country or city? I like living in the suburbs of a city so it’s quiet but you have access to events etc in the city.

3. If you could learn a new skill what would it be? I don’t knowwwww, I feel like right now I have tunnel vision getting better at skills I already have

4. Do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? I don’t with coffee, but I do put splenda in green tea.

5. What was your favourite book as a child? Anne of Green Gables and The Baby-Sitters Club

6. Do you prefer baths or showers? Showers to get clean, baths for fun

7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would it be? Definitely a mermaid

8. Paper or electronic books? Paper books, but fic on my phone or laptop

9. What is your favourite item of clothing? I really love my Little Mix hoodie, I’m ready for summer (and this never-ending heatwave) to be over so I can wear it again

10. Do you like your name or would you like to change it? I do like my name. I used to think it was really common because through eighth grade, there were three Maggies in my grade of 30 kids, but I don’t meet a lot of Maggies nowadays and I like being the only one. Last year someone told me it was old school and then got nervous they offended me, but I’ll totally take it. I don’t think it goes well with my married name, but that’s okay. (Side note, I’m totally un Google able with both my maiden and married names, which I kind of like.)

the rest under the cut!

11. Who is a mentor to you? I don’t think I let people mentor me, to my own detriment.

12. Would you like to be famous and if so, what for? Here’s what I would like: to be interviewed for a documentary as an expert or a witness. That is the level of fame I would like to achieve someday.

13. Are you a restless sleeper? No, I’m usually a heavy sleeper and I don’t move around much. I didn’t sleep well a few years ago when my dad got sick and for a few months after he died, and it was torture.

14. Do you consider yourself a romantic person? Yeah, I’m definitely the Charlotte in the friend group.

15. Which element best represents you? I’ll say water because I’m a double scorpio.

16. Who do you want to be closer to? If we mean like physically, my mom. It’s only half an hour, but it’s too far when she needs help at a moment’s notice. If we mean like relationship wise, I always kind of crave being closer to everyone (again, double scorpio) even though I have trouble opening up, especially at first.

17. Do you miss someone at the moment? yes.

18. Tell us about an early childhood memory. I have this vivid memory of my grandma teaching me how to spell the street name in my uncle’s address when I was really little. She always had to look it up because it had two e’s and two i’s and was hard to remember.

19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten? I’m a picky eater so I’ve probably said no to everything strange offered to me.

20. What are you most thankful for? Harry Styles

21. Do you like spicy food? No, not at allllllll

22. Have you ever met someone famous? When I went to Communicon, I met Yvette Nicole Brown (who is LOVELY) and knocked a sharpie out of Dan Harmon’s hand. I feel like he’s kind of the worst, but he was really nice about the sharpie.

23. Do you keep a diary or journal? I bullet journal, it’s about half lists and organization and half feelings.

24. Do you prefer to use a pen or a pencil? pen!

25. What is your star sign? Both my star and rising sign are scorpio and my moon is sagittarius

26. Do you like your cereal soggy or crunchy? medium

27. What would you want your legacy to be? I’m going to be gross and copy and paste from one of my fics: Connection, telling the people who you love that you do, being as honest and kind as you can, that’s what life – or at least, Harry’s life – is about. And the most that Harry can ask for is to feel ready for it when it’s his time to go, so he’s going to make the fucking most of it while he’s here.

28. Do you like reading, what was the last book you read? yes! I reread The Royal We before starting the sequel The Heir Affair. The last book-length fic I read was Wait For It by dimpled-halo which was amazing and made me nostalgic for HIMYM, which is a real feat because the finale burned that bridge good.

29. How do you show someone you love them? I feel like my love language is acts of service

30. Do you like ice in your drinks? Nooooooo I have sensitive teeth and it bothers me

31. What are you afraid of? Dying. (*Harry voice* that got dark. Also spiders.)

32. What is your favourite scent? coffee

33. Do you address older people by their name or surname? It wildly depends

34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? I think I would live similarly to the way I do now, but I would buy Chanel purses.

35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? I think pools, just because I rarely get to the ocean.

36. What would you do if you found £50 on the ground? Spend it at Target

37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? Probably, but I don’t really remember

38. What is the one thing you would want to teach your children? I really try to pay attention to stuff like if my nephews don’t feel like hugging, they don’t have to

39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? I would probably get more hearts in Harry’s handwriting tbh

40. What can you hear now? The air conditioning kicking on

41. Where do you feel the safest? When my husband reaches out to touch me after noticing that I’m upset or stressed

42. What is the one thing you want to overcome/conquer? depression

43. If you could travel back to any era, what would it be? 1940s

44. What is your most used emoji? Any of the heart ones, I use them a lot

45. Describe yourself using one word. sensitive

46. What do you regret the most? It’s tricky because for me, my regret is not talking about it with my dad when he got sick, but he didn’t want to have those talks and I wanted to let him go the way he wanted to.

47. Last movie you saw? Palm Springs

48. Last tv show you watched? Ladies of London

49. Invent a word and its meaning. My sister and I always say bizhausted to mean like extra exhausted so I’m going with that!

#digging deeper meme #i chickened out of tagging more people #if you do this #say i tagged you!

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nilim · 5 years

Text

Shoin Institute Dungeon Crawl

What is the status of the party after episode 147?

Stats! Stats! Stats! After finishing the synopses for all the episodes of season 4, I’ve done some number crunching and here are some certified Fun Facts(TM) about the dungeon crawl the party is currently on, including amount of spells cast, spell slots left, damage taken, damage dealt, HP left and everyone’s kill counts!

Spellcasting notes:

I counted every individual spell cast that is mentioned out loud on the podcast. Sometimes spells get cut from the episode, as is the case with some healing spells that were used at the end of episode 137 - for this reason, some of the counts might be slightly off because I cannot track what I cannot hear. Additionally, I only count cantrips when it is mentioned they were cast, but I do not count their repeat castings in the same timeframe (e.g., Hamid repeatedly casting ‘Acid Splash’ for 10 minutes only counts as casting it once).

Healing notes:

Like mentioned above, not all healing people have received is actually mentioned in the podcast, I therefore sometimes have to extrapolate how much healing someone has received through other info (like players mentioning the health they have left after receiving damage). I’ve tried my best to make it as accurate as possible, even though the math does not work if you count up all the damage and healing that’s actually mentioned in the show.

Without further ado:

(Updated for episode 147)

Zolf

Zolf has cast spells 11 times for a total of 10 unique spells. We do not have confirmation of how many spell slots he has, so the slots below are based on the assumption his wisdom is 18 (+4). Additionally, Zolf has 1 domain spell slot available for each spell level he can cast. He has used the following spells:

Level 0 (slots: 1/unlimited)

Detect Magic (1)

Level 1 (Slots: 3/5 + 0/1 domain)

Inflict Wounds (1)

Bless (1)

Doom (1)

Level 2 (Slots: 2/4 + 0/1 domain)

Bull’s Strength (2)

Level 3: (Slots: 3/4 + 1/1 Domain)

Prayer (1) (This is potentially a Domain Spell)

Protection from Energy (1)

Searing Light (1)

Cure Serious Wounds (1)

Level 4: (Slots: 1/3 + 0/1 domain)

Heal Critical Wounds (1) (Converted from an Inflict Critical Wounds)

It is possible Zolf has cast additional spells to heal himself, as some healing was cut from the end of episode 137, and somewhere before episode 147. However, because it’s not in the episode, I cannot account for any spell slots that have been used in this way. Therefore, Zolf probably has the following spell slots left:

Level 1: 2 (+1 domain)

Level 2: 2 (+1 domain)

Level 3: 1

Level 4: 2 (+1 domain)

Additionally, he has used Channel Positive Energy 4 times. He probably also cast Channel Positive Energy 2 times in episode 145, although we cannot be sure as Ben doesn’t mention the spell he uses. If he did, he would have cast it a total of 6 times. Channel Positive Energy can be cast 3 + charisma times per day. Zolf’s charisma was 8 (-1) at level 1 (which would mean he’d only have 2 slots). We don’t know what his charisma is at level 8, but barring a dramatic increase in his charisma stat, I will assume he’s currently out of Channel Positive Energy.

Domain Powers

Zolf has the Freedom’s Call ability and the Unity ability, both of which he has used on this dungeon crawl. We therefore know Zolf’s current clerical domains are Liberation and Community. Zolf probably cast Prayer as a potential domain spell and has cast Calming Touch 5 times to cure everyone’s fatigue during the lift shaft descend. Zolf has chosen the Freedom subdomain for his Liberation domain, which grants him Liberty’s Blessing.

Therefore he has left:

Channel Positive Energy: 0

Unity: 0

Calming Touch: 2 out of 7 left

Liberty’s Blessing: 7

Freedom’s Call: 6 out of 8 rounds left

Damage Dealt

Zolfs had dealt a total of 124 damage to 6 unique creatures, and he has 3 kills.

If we count objects/robots, Zolf has destroyed 2 eye-robots, 1 alarm trap, 4 power crystals, and 1 lightning rod.

Damage Taken

Zolf has taken a staggering 269 damage, going unconscious once. (Note: Here I have counted the damage Zolf receives during episode 144 as 9 HP of damage, even though Ben says “8″ out loud when he’s calculating half of 19 points of damage. I do not condone bad maths.).

He has healed a total of 226 HP (some of which is assumed to have taken place behind the scenes after the end of episode 137 and therefore the total healing amount is extrapolated from the fact he was at -3 HP after getting hit by the spike trap, and the fact he was at 39 HP at the end of ep 147).

Zolf is currently at 39 HP.

----

Hamid

Hamid has been a very busy boy. He’s cast 51 spells while on the island (not counting repeat castings of cantrips), using a total of 13 unique spells. His favourite spells are:

Cantrips (Slots: 29/unlimited)

Dancing Lights (12)

Acid Splash (9)

Detect Magic (6)

Mage Hand (2)

Level 1 (Slots: 7/7)

Magic Missile (6)

Mage Armour (1)

Level 2 (Slots: 5/7)

Scorching Ray (3)

Detect Thoughts (1)

Resist Energy (1)

Level 3 (Slots: 9/6)

Fireball (4)

Fly (4)

Hold Person (1)

Level 4 (Slots: 1/4)

Rainbow Pattern (1)

As you can see, Hamid has cast 9 level 3 spells even though he only has 6 level 3 spell slots. Therefore I will assume he has cast at least three of those spells using a level 4 spell slot, so he has the following spell slots left:

Level 1: 0

Level 2: 2

Level 3: 0

Level 4: 0

Damage dealt

Hamid’s damage dealt is considerably higher than the rest of the party due to the nature of Fireball, which deals a large amount of damage to each creature in its radius. Hamid has dealt a total of 1913 damage to 54 different creatures. He has killed 50 creatures (21 kobolds, 3 humans, 6 oozes, 19 blobs, and 1 giant pipe organ machine).

Note: If we do not multiply the fireball damage by the amount of creatures in its radius, Hamid still managed to deal a total of 329 damage, which remains the highest of the party.

If we count objects/robots, Hamid has destroyed 3 eye-robots through the use of magic missile.

Damage taken

Hamid has taken a total of 38 fire damage, but due to his fire resistance he’s only taken 11 damage in total. He’s been healed for a total of 57 HP, meaning he’s currently at his max of 45 HP.

---

Cel

Cel has used 9 different extracts with 6 unique spell effects. They’ve also used 14 bombs. There is a lot of info that we do not yet know about Cel, such as their ability modifiers, which makes it hard to extrapolate some of the data we need to know how much juice they have left. Therefore most of what we know about Cel is based on assumptions which I will try to justify.

Cel’s current max HP is 43, which means they probably have a -1 constitution modifier (Note: Lydia says in episode 146 that Cel’s constitution is 10, and their modifier is +0, this would mean their actual max HP should be 50 and not 43). Cel has used 14 bombs during this dungeon crawl, and they’re currently out. Bombs are based on the alchemist’s level + intelligence modifier, which means that Cel’s intelligence modifier must be a very high +6. Based on this int modifier, Cel is able to manufacture a significant amount of extra extracts per day.

I do not know which spell the ‘turn into a dolphin’ extract is. It could be Beast Shape 1, but this is a level 3 spell, and Lydia mentions at the end of episode 132 that Cel can become a dolphin ‘12 more times’, which would make it an unknown level 1 spell. (Edit: It appears Lydia might have misspoken, and that this spell is indeed Beast Shape 1 and not an unknown level 1 extract.)

The ‘12 more times’ comment is very interesting, because it hints that Cel only has 13 extracts available to them per day - which would mean their intelligence modifier is not +6 but +4. Let us therefore assume that their modifier is +4. Based on these assumptions, Cel has used the following extracts:

Level 1 (Slots: 2/5)

Cure Light Wounds (1)

Shield (1)

Level 2 (Slots: 5/5)

Focused Scrutiny (2)

Turn Invisible (1)

Vomit Swarm (2)

Level 3 (Slots: 2/3)

Beast Shape 1 (2)

In addition, Cel as a level 8 alchemist has 1 mutagen available, and they have used up all 14 of their bombs. In episode 145 Cel used a beastmorph mutagen. Therefore, they have the following extracts, bombs and mutagens left:

Level 1: 3

Level 2: 0

Level 3: 1

Mutagen: 0

Bombs: 0

Damage dealt

Cel has dealt 254 damage to 13 different creatures. This does not include the damage dealt to the phalanx of kobolds on the stairs with the spider swarm, because Alex did not reveal how many kobolds there were nor how much damage they took from the swarm. Cel has probably killed 11-12 creatures (Confirmed: 1 big ooze, 3 kobolds, 5 blobs. Unconfirmed: 2-3 kobolds that were pushed over the railing of the stairwell due to the panic caused by the spider swarm).

Damage taken

Cel has taken a total of 104 damage, most of it from the pipe organ machine. They have received a total of 114 HP, and are currently at their max of 22 HP.

---

Azu

Azu’s spellcasting is based on her charisma, which is +3. Due to her high charisma, she has 1 extra spell slot available to her for each spell level. Azu has cast the following spells:

Level 1 (Slots: 1/2)

Ironbeard (1)

Level 2 (Slots: 0/2)

(none)

In addition, she has a number of Lay on Hands equal to half her class level + her charisma, which means she currently has 7. She has used a total of 6 Lay on Hands to heal Zolf and Cel and herself. However, it is possible she has used more to heal Zolf after the end of episode 137 as some healing was cut from the episode, so this number might be incorrect.

Additionally, Azu has the ability to convert two Lay on Hands into one Channel Positive Energy if she so desires. Furthermore, her divine bond allows her to summon Topaz once per day. She therefore has the following left:

Level 1: 1

Level 2: 2

Divine Bond: 1

Lay on Hands: 1

Channel Positive Energy: 0 (Note: this would consume 2 uses of Lay on Hands, therefore Azu is unable to cast it right now)

Damage dealt

Azu has dealt a total of 265 damage to 8 different creatures (note: when damage is not mentioned, such as with fighting the blobs, I counted the minimum damage she would be able to do to kill a creature). She has killed 7 creatures (1 Goolem, 1 kobold, 5 blobs), all of which exploded due to the force of her attack.

Damage taken

Azu has taken a total of 176 damage. She has been healed for a total of 123 HP, which means she’s currently at 5 HP.

---

Skraak

I don’t know a single thing about Skraak, but based on the stats of the other kobolds I’m going to assume they have about 6-ish HP. They have taken no damage, and they are currently using a syringe spear as a weapon.

Damage dealt

So far Skraak has not had the chance to fight anything besides Hamid, and they failed to hit Hamid. They have therefore dealt a total of 0 damage.

Damage taken

So far Skraak has avoided taking any damage, but they did get healed for 14 HP by Zolf’s Channel Positive Energy, and they are currently at their max of around ~6 HP.

Party Summary

‘Spells’ Cast

Azu: 1 + 6 Lay on Hands

Cel: 9 + 1 mutagen

Hamid: 51 (29 cantrips, 22 spell slots)

Zolf: 12 + 6 Channel Positive Energy + 5 Calming Touch

‘Spells’ left (not counting cantrips)

Azu: 3 + 1 Lay on Hands

Cel: 4 + 0 mutagens

Hamid: 2

Zolf: 10 + 0 Channel Positive Energy + 2 Calming Touch

Azu: 5/70

Cel: 22/59 (normally: 43/43, but maybe should be 50?)

Hamid: 45/45

Zolf: 39/? (Max 82? Maybe 88? 90? Who even knows at this point)

Skraak: 6?

Damage Taken

Azu: 176

Cel: 104

Hamid: 11

Zolf: 269

Skraak: 0

Damage Dealt

Azu: 265

Cel: 254

Hamid: 1913

Zolf: 124

Skraak: 0

Kill Counts:

Azu: 7

Cel: 11 or 12

Hamid: 50

Zolf: 3

Skraak: 0

Healing Produced

Azu: 78 + ? (+ 29 in healing potions)

Cel: 7

Hamid: 0

Zolf: 102 + ?

Skraak: 0

Healing Received

Azu: 123

Cel: 114

Hamid: 57

Zolf: 226

Skraak: 14

Status/effects:

Azu: Water Breathing active, Ironbeard (+1 to AC), Potion of Giant Strength (+4 strength; current strength is 21, +5 bonus)

Cel: Water Breathing active, beast morph mutagen Active (HP up to 59, can fly 30 feet, darkvision, terrifying visage)

Hamid: Greater Invisibility

Zolf: Bless Active (+1 to attack rolls and saving throws against fear effects)

Skraak: None

Items received:

Azu: Potions: Mega Juice (many), Run Away (many), Water Walk (1), Water Breathing (1; Azu drank this potion in 144), Giant Strength (1; Azu drank this potion in 145) - Items: Adamantine Axe

Cel: Potions: Mega Juice (many), Run Away (many), Antidote (1), Water Walk (1), Water Breathing (2; Cel drank 1 of these potions in 144), Cure Serious Wounds (1) - Items: Golden Watch, Piece of paper with the number ‘5′ on it, Utility wrench, Dungeoneering kit

Hamid: Potions: Mega Juice (many), Run away (many), Greater Invisibility (1; Hamid drank this potion in 147) - Items: Fancy set of Halfling Clothes, Rack of 6 unlabeled test tubes, Utility Wrench, Stalking Dagger, Cloak of Elvenkind - Unclear if taken: Small wooden locked box with piece of paper, Dungeoneering kit

Zolf: Potions: Mega Juice (many), Run Away (many), Antidote (2), Water Walk (1), Water Breathing (1) - Items: Metal punch card (3)

Unclear who has it: Fire Axe (2), Utility Wrench (1), Utility boxes with solvent and glue (2)

Skraak: Potions: Unknown healing potion (1, received from Hamid)

#rqg #rusty quill gaming #rqg spoilers #rqgstats

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andrewdz · 5 years

Text

Favorite Albums of 2019

2019 was a big year for me in music. According to my Last.FM stats, it’s the most music I’ve listened to in one year. That played a big role in why I have a top 50 albums list for the year. There was a lot of stuff I really enjoyed.

I tried to find new bands this year because I’m over 30 now which they say is around the time you stop seeking new music and I want to prove that wrong. 14 out of my top 50 were brand new artists to me, which I wish was higher, but that’s a goal for next year now.

I also reignited my love for some bands. I got really into the Go-Betweens in 2019. I bought a documentary about them, a book about the two founders of the band, and got a box set of their last three albums that is now one of most prized music possessions. I also found some Deerhunter records in Nashville that I listened to quite a bit. I also got to see them live this year which was a real treat. Other artists I got really into this year was Townes Van Zandt, Guy Clark, Bombay Bicycle Club, Chris Isaak, Hightide Hotel, The Brave Little Abacus and Titus Andronicus (who I was already into, but got almost all of their albums on vinyl now).

It was another terrific year for live shows as well, as I got to see a lot of artists I loved as well as ones on my bucket list. Kacey Musgraves, Sharon Van Etten, Priests, mewithoutyou (2nd time), Tigers Jaw, Titus Andronicus (2nd Time), Angel Olsen (3rd Time), Deerhunter, Trampled by Turtles, and Miami Horror. The best month was late April to late May when I got to go to five amazing but very different shows. It was one of the most fun months of my life. I got to see the Drums (2nd Time), PUP, Ratboys, Doomsquad, Operators, Desire, Chromatics, and Passion Pit! All of them were some of the best shows I’ve ever been to.

Now enough about my music year, let’s get to the list. I only wrote things about the top 30 but wanted to highlight some other ones so expanded the list to 50. Like I mentioned earlier, it was a really great year of music. Not sure if I will release a list of favorite songs this year, but we’ll see. I’ve lately become more of an album fan instead of singles. Let me know what you checked out this year!

50. Chromatics – Closer to Grey

49. Hatchie – Keepsake

48. Nilufer Yana – Miss Universe

47. Denzel Curry - ZUU

46. Pedro the Lion - Phoenix

45. Proper. - I Spent the Winter Writing Songs About Getting Better

44. Turnover – Altogether

43. Jay Som – Anak Ko

42. Big Thief – Two Hands

41. Jimmy Eat World - Surviving

40. Titus Andronicus – An Obelisk

39. The National – I Am Easy to Find

38. Priests – Seduction of Kansas

37. DIIV – Deceiver

36. Mildura - Mildura

35. Jamila Woods – LEGACY! LEGACY!

34. Doomsquad – Let Yourself Be Seen

33. Charly Bliss – Young Enough

32. Operators – Radiant Dawn

31. Black Marble – Bigger Than Life

30. The Get Up Kids – Problems

I was late on the Get Up Kids (I know, I know, I’ll turn in my emo card after this article), and I’ve been trying to catch-up these past couple years. And what perfect timing because it’s the first album in eight years (They also had a terrific EP in 2018). It’s a really good return album from them. They can still write amazing pop punk anthems, and few bands leave songs stuck in my head as often as the Get Up Kids do. It’s interesting that the early wave of emo are now elder statesmen of the scene and they touch on that a little in this album. Reflecting on the past and what it means to be a band in 2019. It’s always good to see a band not only not just rely on nostalgia to tour on, but still release relevant music that stands up with some of their best material.

Favorite Track: Satellite

29. Bon Iver – i,i

It’s interesting where Bon Iver has gone in the past decade. First bursting on the scene with the perfect story of going to a cabin and recording a heartbreaking breakup album. Since then he’s won some Grammys, been featured on Kanye West songs, and embraced the synthesizer. For some reason, however, this album reminds me more of “For Emma, Forever Go” than his previous couple albums despite still using the more electronic approach. It has that same raw honesty that his debut had. He’s not alone in the woods anymore. He’s commanding a large group of musicians now, creating this huge sound without losing any of his heart. He also sounds more assured in himself. It’s seems like the beginning of a new era for Justin Vernon and the last song “RABi” sounds like his “riding off into the sunset” moment. Awaiting the next adventure.

Favorite Track: Faith

28. Yola – Walk Through Fire

A really strong debut album from singer/songwriter Yola. It’s really soothing with a nice wall of sound production that just sweeps you away. It also helps that she has such an amazing voice. Songs like “Faraway Look” & “Lonely the Night” feel like songs I’ve known my entire life, but was just waiting for Yola to record them. Really excited to see what she does next.

Favorite Track: Lonely the Night

27. Prince Daddy & the Hyena – Cosmic Thrill Seekers

“Cosmic Thrill Seekers” is an ambitious album, like “The Monitor” level of ambitious. It’s written almost entirely by Kory Gregory about his cycles of struggling with mental health with allusions to Wizard of Oz. They take you on a journey on this album. The feelings of self-destruction, to wanting to escape from people who aren’t even your friends, and not quite fitting in with rest of the world while also playing the most anthemic guitar riffs and crashing cymbals. I can only imaging what the experience is like seeing this album performed live. It would have to feel like a sonic tornado, and you would wonder what just happened after you’re walking away on the street. This album didn’t make it number one on any charts, but this album is going to mean so much to so many people. Also, the last track goes right back into the first one to begin the cycle again.

Favorite Track: Lauren (Track 2)

26. Strange Ranger – Remembering the Rockets

It’s amazing how much this album reminds me of 90’s indie rock. It is so easy to picture Strange Ranger playing this album in between sets of Mazzy Star and Teenage Fanclub. I had not really clicked with Strange Ranger’s earlier stuff, but this album just seemed to make sense to me. It sounds like a fully formed album with a band that is confident enough to be more adventurous. There are some incredibly poppy hooks, but also some interesting synth beat choices. Also the switch of singing songs about the end of the world to being excited to go on a date gives the album a little extra something. A good mixture of despair and hope.

Favorite Track: Leona

25. Lost Under Heaven – Love Hates What You’ve Become

I love when a band just says “F*** It! Let’s make songs meant to be heard in a stadium,” even though they will never get a chance to. This is one of those albums that is meant to be turned all the way up with you screaming along to every chorus in your car. They are definitely wearing their hearts on their sleeve on this one, encouraging you be the best version of ourselves so by the time the album reaches it’s colossal closer “For the Wild,” you are ready to take on the world. It’s fun when a band decides to be super sincere on an album. You actually feel like rock and roll will save us, just like you did when you were a teenager and first found music for yourself.

Favorite Track: For the Wild

24. Mark Ronson – Late Night Feelings

I think my favorite thing about a Mark Ronson record is how much they seem like an awesome compilation album, and this one lives up to its name and is a perfect soundtrack for late night out on the town. He’s got a great ear for collaborators creating the perfect songs to best suit their voices. Lykke Li, Angel Olsen, Alicia Keys, and even Miley Cyrus have some terrific showings on this record. There’s no super hit like “Uptown Funk” on this album, but it is a fun listening experience, and I cannot get enough of Angel Olsen’s “True Blue” on here (Which really should have ended the album. It’s a perfect end credits song).

Favorite Track: True Blue

23. The Drums – Brutalism

The Drums are a group that has had quite a decade. They’ve released four albums, and every member but Johnny has left the group. “Brutalism,” however, is still a strong album in one of the best indie rock discographies of the past 20 years. There are some throwback songs to the early Drums days (Body Chemistry), a rare acoustic ballad (Nervous), and one of the catchiest songs they’ve ever written (626 Bedford Ave). The Drums get overlooked, but they’ve quietly created an impressive catalogue that is just begging to be reevaluated with “Brutalism“ adding a lot to that conversation. Not many indie rock bands make it to five albums, let alone having songs on that fifth album that fit along their biggest hits.

Favorite Track: 626 Bedford Ave.

22. Brittany Howard – Jaime

When I first heard this album was coming out, I thought it meant that Alabama Shakes were done as a band and Brittany was going to be an exclusively solo artist now. However, after listening to this album, I understand why it was not an Alabama Shakes record. This is a very personal record that just wouldn’t sound right as a band collaboration. This is Brittany’s story. She’s singing about life on the road, her faith, first crushes, family, and making sense of what it’s like growing up in the south. This solo record also gave her a chance to explore some different sounds than she would have on an Alabama Shakes record. You can hear some Prince influence, especially on the final track “Run to Me.” Not sure if she plans to release more solo records, but I hope this isn’t the last.

Favorite Track: History Repeats

21. (Sandy) Alex G – House of Sugar

“House of Sugar” has probably got my favorite Side A of any record this year. It just gives a chance to showcase what I love about (Sandy) Alex G so much. You’ve got the psychedelic drone style and that fast almost folk-punk style. It’s just filled with this fun eclectic sound and his voice, while probably viewed as limited in sense of range, just captures so much emotion in the music. I found this record to be one that rewards you the most the more you listen to it. I feel like I’m always discovering something new with each listen. I always enjoy checking out the latest (Sandy) Alex G record because his albums are always adventurous, and “House of Sugar” is definitely that. I would have a tough time describing this album. It’s like when you’re in a dream and there are those moments that completely change the scenario and location, but for some reason it makes sense to you in a way you can’t explain. That’s what this album is like for me.

Favorite Track: Gretal

20. Angel Olsen – All Mirrors

If I had to describe this album, I would say it’s Angel Olsen’s “Nebraska” if she had Bauhaus as her backing band. This is a big sounding record, and it’s easy to let the emotional crescendos take you away. You feel every emotion she’s putting on this record, and it is a wild ride. It’s a breakup record, and this album does a good job of capturing that feeling fresh off a breakup that just feels like a tornado of feelings. It’s a storm of emotions, but sometimes there’s a beauty in a storm as well. She said there’s an acoustic version of this album that will come out next year, but I’m glad we got to hear this version first. We get to feel the real raw emotion on this, and then when more time has passed a chance to be softer with a more reflective look back.

Favorite track: All Mirrors

19. billy woods + kenny segal – Hiding Places

It really sounds like Woods is letting it all out on this album; frustrations with music, other people, the current state of things, and his intensity is only amplified by the beats from Kenny Segal. The samples on this album are not catchy, and they shouldn’t be. This is an album that wants you to reckon with what Woods is saying. That’s what makes the final album so impressive. It’s a perfect blend between Wood’s lyrics and Segal’s beats. Complimenting each other in frustration and uneasiness. I was not familiar with either artists before this album, but I’m definitely a fan now, and I hope they will collaborate again in the near future.

Favorite Track: Red Dust

18. Truth Club – Not an Exit

There is something very old school about Truth Club. They’ve got this post-punk nasty guitar riff energy that just make this an album a delight to hear. They sound like a band with something to prove, delivering exactly what you want from a post-punk record. Sweet riffs, monotone vocals, and done in less than a half-hour. Love it.

Favorite Track: Student Housing

17. Helado Negro – This is How You Smile

Sometimes records just feel like a dream as if you can just see the music and travel in it. That’s how I feel every time I listen to “This is How you Smile.” The mixture of electronic and folk makes such beautiful music and Roberto Carlos Lange’s voice is perfect on top of these amazing collections of sound. Apparently he invited a lot of different musicians to play on this record and it really sounds like a group of friends got together and had the perfect jam with Lange’s artistic vision taking the lead. Some songs tackle today’s issues with even some field recordings from an Abolish ICE March in Brooklyn and singing about being proud of being Latinx, but not being confrontational about it. It’s beautiful music with a message.

Favorite Track: Please Won’t Please

16. Deerhunter - Why Hasn't Everything Already Disappeared?

You’ve got to give credit to Deerhunter for continuing to make really interesting albums throughout all of the 2010s, and this one seems like a good one to end the decade with. When so many of their contemporaries have disbanded or walked away from music, Deerhunter has kept going. Not resting on their past success, but creating new sounds and challenging their audience to go somewhere new with them. They can still write an amazing hook and the lyrics are as sharp as any previous album. It’s an ode to a world that seems to be on the brink of destruction by its own design.

Favorite Track: Plains

15. Anderson Paak – Ventura

Anderson Paak is on quite a creative streak with this being his fourth album in five years and I think this one may be my favorite. He’s got some amazing guests singers on this album including Andre 3000, Brandy, and the legendary Smokey Robinson. It just sounds terrific too. The 70’s soul-funk inspiration makes for some of the best grooves I’ve heard this year, and it’s a perfect album for a night drive.

Favorite Track: Jet Black

14. PUP – Morbid Stuff

Few bands do “ANGER” as good as PUP, but Morbid Stuff is not the typical angry record either. It’s like “I’m angry. You’re angry. Let’s be angry together” kind of record which is perfect for the general attitude of 2019. PUP inspires a real passionate fan base, and on this record it’s easy to see why. They packed it with cathartic anthems for the disenfranchised. Not getting along with your family? Not quite over your ex? Feel like you missed that turn you were supposed to take in life about four years ago? Get over here and let all that anger out by singing along with us. This album is community even though you can’t be with this group in person. It also helps that this is a band that can PLAY. The musicianship is just fantastic which is probably helped because this is a band. These four guys have been PUP since the beginning and they sound better and better on each album. So let’s get angry!

Favorite Track: Kids

13. Raphael Saadiq – Jimmy Lee

It’s been eight years since the last Raphael Saadiq album, and it’s understandable because this album is dealing with a lot of heavy issues; addiction, incarceration, faith, and losing family. It’s also an album that Raphael Saadiq could have only made after being a bit older with some life wisdom to look back at. Sometimes it can be uncomfortable to listen to, but also necessary. It feels like a very personal album, and you can tell how much work must have been put into producing it. The album sounds terrific, which makes sense for how much experience he’s had producing other projects in-between albums. I also forget how talented of a singer he is. This album is a real showcase of his vocal skills. Some songs sound like he’s pouring his soul into it, and just somehow keeping his voice from breaking. You get swept up in that anger he feels. This album will make you really think about where the world has been, where it’s at today, and where it’s going. A powerful and necessary album for 2019.

Favorite Track: Rearview

12. Orville Peck – Pony

Orville Peck’s music is the kind of music that would sound just as perfect being performed on stage at the Grand Ole Opry as it would hearing it off a jukebox in a dive bar in the middle of nowhere. Peck’s really tapped into that timeless country sound that just seems to sounds good anywhere in any situation. Feeling sad? Perfect. Feeling that freedom you get from just hitting the road alone? Perfect. That baritone voice is so beautiful to listen to as well. It’s a new generations Roy Orbison or Chris Isaak. Beautiful but haunting, and it wouldn’t sound out of place in a David Lynch film. The storytelling in the lyrics are also astounding. I can picture the desert riding while listening to “Dead of Night.” It’s fascinating to know that this is Peck’s first album because it’s so well formed in terms of lyrics, vocals, and hooks. Makes me even more excited for what the next album will sound like.

Favorite Track: Dead of Night

11. Great Grandpa – Four of Arrows

“Four of Arrows” sounds like a level up album from Great Grandpa after their terrific debut “Plastic Cough.” It’s a great example of a band expanding their sound without losing the identity that made their first album special. The band sounds tighter, richer (especially with the addition of strings and synths on some songs), and more ambitious. It also helps to have the amazing Alex Menne vocals. She really conveys an energy that escalates these songs’ emotional payoffs. Especially on a song like “Digger” where she sings (almost screams) “That’s why I hate you,” “That’s why I love you” with almost the same energy. You may not know what each song is about, but you certainly know how it feels.

Favorite Track: Treat Jar

10. Holy Ghost! – Work

Sometimes all you need is great dance album in your life, and Holy Ghost! provided that for me this year. They have a kind of style of dance music that has fallen out of critical favor by the end of this decade, but I still love to hear it. They continued the tradition of Daft Punk’s “Random Access Memories” of applying their flavor to 70’s dance music, and it’s terrific fun. This album is super catchy, has wonderfully danceable grooves, and features a 7-minute plus dance closer. A perfect dance record.

Favorite track: Do This

9. American Football - American Football (LP3)

With emo revival being a big topic of conversation this past decade in certain music critics’ world, it’s only fair that one of the greatest emo bands ends the decade with a terrific album. After reuniting a couple years ago for an okay album, I’m glad they went back to studio to create an album worthy of comparison to their first album that influenced so many amazing artists. The musicianship on this album is just stunning, with a rich tapestry of melancholy permeating throughout. They also happened to create possibly the best duet of the decade by having fellow emo legend Haley Williams join them for “Uncomfortably Numb.” Just beautiful. #defendemo

Favorite Track: Uncomfortably Numb

8. oso oso – Basking in the Glow

To be honest, I feel invested in oso oso. I remember a few years back he released “the yunahon mixtape” as a pay what you want on Bandcamp and planning to walk away from music. I checked it out, and loved it on first listen. Then the album got some nice shout-outs from critics and other artists and eventually found an audience. So to see not only oso oso stick with music, but to release this terrific follow up record as well, feels like a win for everyone. There is a common misconception that emo=sad music, but this album shows that is not the case. There’s a joy on this album that is super infectious. He wants you to feel a part of his joy. It’s an album of positivity that we needed in 2019, and it helps that so many of these songs are very catchy. This is the “dance around your bedroom” kind of album, and just let yourself go for a half-hour. I’m so happy that this album is getting recognized on so many year-end lists. It feels like a win for the entire emo scene that usually gets ignored. The fact that it happened to oso oso makes it all the better.

Favorite track: The View

7. Big Thief - U.F.O.F.

I always thought of Big Thief as a perfect band for fall. Something about their music feels like the end of something before dealing with something that will be tough but necessary. That they’re the ferryman taking us into the next stage in life, and the cost is you’re going to feel a little sad listening to some heartbreaking tales. U.F.O.F., their first album of 2019, can break you down. In the first track “Contact” we hear lead singer Adrianne Lenker let out these howling screams. Giving ua permission to let yourself go. Be your most pure self as this album takes you on a journey. I don’t mean to make this album sound depressing, because even though there’re numerous allusions to death it is quite hopeful. You get to LIVE because one day you will die. It makes life more important because it has an ending. This album doesn’t have a lot of hooks on it, but it just makes it more important to listen to it as an album. It’s one big piece that feels so right together. It’s hard to imagine anyone having as creatively successful year as Big Thief did in 2019. Kind of apt they got it in right before the end of a decade. A necessary end, I think.

Favorite Track: Cattails

6. Mini Dresses – Heaven Sent

Listening to Mini Dresses’ “Heaven Sent” feels like I found some hidden album demo from the early 2000s that was secretly a masterpiece. I truly do not know why hardly anyone seems to be talking about this album. If it came out in 2008 it feels like it would have been huge on indie blogs. This album is so catchy and a style of indie rock that doesn’t seem to be big anymore, which is a shame because it’s too good to miss. This album reminds me of Blondie if they would have been part of the indie wave of the mid-2000s, which if that sounds cool to you, please check this album out.

Favorite Track: Rank and File

5. Better Oblivion Community Center – Better Oblivion Community Center

After hearing “Would You Rather” on Phoebe Bridgers’ phenomenal debut album “Stranger in the Alps,” I suppose we were all secretly hoping for more songs from Conor Oberst and Phoebe. There are few songwriters that can capture the feeling of loneliness and emptiness, but still have that sense of hope that it can somehow get better like these two can. “If you’re not feeling ready, there’s always tomorrow” on their last song “Dominos” really hits that point home. Their voices sound great together and the production on this album is fantastic. They’ve got the hooks, they’ve got the ballads, and they’re ready to make you cry, but they will be the first ones to help pick you back up. This album feels like an old friend that knows you get sad sometimes, but is always there for you when you need them.

Favorite Track: Dylan Thomas

4. glass beach – the first glass beach album

There’s nothing better than when a band just goes for it on an album. I haven’t listened to an album that has made me think of emo, Disney, Hellogoodbye, and Playstation video game soundtracks all before I’ve even made it to track 5. It’s like they threw everything on the wall and everything stuck. I would not be surprised to find out that this band is around my age. It sounds like an album that only someone who grew up in the 90’s and early 2000’s could make. Just picking sounds from everything in that era and making an album out of it. It’s pure chaos, but somehow completely makes sense. This album is not for everybody, but if it clicks with you, it’s like it’s looking into your soul.

Favorite track: cold weather

3. Slaughter Beach Dog – Safe and Also No Fear

I was a big fan of Modern Baseball, like all good emo revival fans should be, and was super sad to hear they were going on indefinite hiatus. When I heard Jake Ewald was starting a new project as Slaughter Beach Dog, I checked out some songs from his album “Birdie” but didn’t really connect with it. Probably because I wanted something more like Modern Baseball. Then when this album came out, it had some buzz from critics whose opinions on music closely line up with mine, and I checked out this album. Whatever opinion I had on the first album, this one was the exact opposite. I really connected with. Listening to it feels like those times where you visit your old hometown, driving around the old spots you used to hang out. Then you realize these spots don’t mean what they did to you anymore, and they never could. No matter how much old friends want you to be that old person again, you can’t go backwards and you’re fine with that. This is also a beautiful sounding record. It sounds like Jake let the other musicians have a bit more say in the sound, and it does sound like a band collaboration. It’s a sweet indie/folk/alternative sound that just pierces my soul. If we don’t get another Modern Baseball reunion, that’s fine. It sounds like Jake has moved on, and I’m ready to follow wherever his new music takes him.

Favorite Track: Black Oak

2. Sharon Van Etten – Remind Me Tomorrow

It’s always exciting to witness an artist make the album they were always meant to. All of her work has lead up to her masterpiece. You feel her soul on this record. Not one moment feels faked. She’s not hiding anything from the listener. Talking about letting go of your past self (I Told You Everything), making a new version of yourself (Comeback Kid), letting yourself love again (Jupiter 4), and what it’s like to be a mother (Stay). Also, on this record she embraces the synth and it makes for some tremendous production. The anthems have an extra kick to them. Not only is this a terrific album for 2019, but one of the standouts of the decade from an artist who already had an impressive discography these past ten years. I’m not sure where she will go next, but I’m hoping this is a sign of what to expect from her in the 2020s.

Favorite Track: Seventeen

1. Purple Mountains – Purple Mountains

This is my favorite album of 2019, and it’s not even close. I was not familiar with David Berman until I heard the first couple singles before the album came out. His name was one that I heard critics tweet about or referenced by other artists, but had never really checked out his music. However, after hearing “All My Happiness is Gone” and “Darkness and Cold” I could not get enough of this music. The melodies were incredibly catchy, I thought the lyrics were super memorable, and they just felt like they really connected with me. He sounded like a natural storyteller, and I was hooked on every word he said. I’m not usually a lyrics person, but I paid attention when I heard these songs. Then when the album came out, it was a treasure trove of an album that I could really dive into. This heartland country sound with a terrific backing band, Woods, complimenting David Berman’s unique voice. I loved it immediately. Then when the tragic news came out of David Berman’s passing, it hit me hard. It’s difficult to talk about this album without acknowledging David committed suicide shortly after it was released. However, I don’t think of this album as a suicide note. This really felt like an album about life. There are struggles, but there are the good moments too. Find the happiness where you can. Margaritas at the mall, that lovely connection of a child with their parent, and if the snow is falling and it’s looking bad, enjoy how warm it will be inside. Berman’s legacy will be everything he contributed to culture; his poetry, his wit, his dark humor, and especially the music. Every once in awhile now when I hear “All My Happiness is Gone” on the radio or if it comes up on a shuffled playlist, my eyes start to well up. Not because I’m sad, but because I’m happy David shared a piece of his soul with us. That’s the real power of music.

Favorite Track: All My Happiness is Gone

41 notes · View notes

lasercruz · 4 years

Text

@quarterdollar fuck you and im sorry that i took so long to answer and i hope that im mostly coherent because i am. very tired as im typing this

1: Full name Nicky Jackie Marie Cruz !!

2: Age 21

3: 3 Fears Mold, tall heights if I’m not secured (like, I’m not scared of rollercoaster heights but I’m scared of like, cliffs), and balloons esp balloon animals

4: 3 things I love I love so many things uhh hh h. Jjba, adventure zone, and my friendssss 💞

I know turn ons/offs aren’t inherently sexual but i never know what to say for them so im skipping them :0

7: My best friend you 🥺🥺

8: Sexual orientation bi

9: My best first date ive never really been on a actual date :0

10: How tall am I 5′3

11: What do I miss being with my friends physically and just watching stuff or goofing around on the floor 😭

12: What time were I born 11:02pm

13: Favourite color Dark blues

14: Do I have a crush yes shh

15: Favourite quote there so much sappy quotes that are on uquizzes a lot that i like a lot the first that comes to mind is “ You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you.” and so on and also “if i loved you less i might be able to talk about it more”

16: Favourite place As far as just physically and not like people or other stuff that comes with with a place, I miss VT campus a lot tbh more than I thought I would. To pick a more specific place, the gazebo at the duck pond cause its where I’d go if I wanted to be alone or like if my roommate was sleeping or working and i didnt want to worry about being quite and it was always super peaceful

17: Favourite food I dont really have One favorite food it just depends what I’m in the mood for but my go to answer for favorite food category wise is either chinese or seafood

18: Do I use sarcasm Depends who I’m with ?? Generally no not often but if im close with someone and just goofin yeah

19: What am I listening to right now My love song playlist. its my go to thing to listen to cause my playlist with all my music has so much on it that i end up skipping half the songs until i find something im in the mood for and this one has a lot less that i end up skipping. the current song its on is day without you by keep for cheap

20: First thing I notice in new person It depends on the person like if they have something that stands out about them, thats what I tend to notice but like. How they carry themself i guess ? cause i feel like thats a easy way to get a read on somebody before talking to them

21: Shoe size 5 mens / 7 womans

22: Eye color Brown

23: Hair color Naturally dark brown but currently dyed black with rainbow bangs

24: Favourite style of clothing this question is on so many ask games and quizzes and I never know how to answer it cause i feel like i dont really have one specific style,, I like colorful and fun stuff i guess ?

25: Ever done a prank call? No and if you prank call a place of business youre annoying. i used to answer phones at work and we didn’t get them super often but GOD i hate prank callers

27: Meaning behind my URL emu is an old nickname and what i mainly went by until i settled on Nicky and this. is my blog.

28: Favourite movie Baby driver !!

29: Favourite song my go to answer for this is community gardens by the scary jokes

30: Favourite band THE SCARY JOKES

31: How I feel right now sleeby,,,,

32: Someone I love i love , my friendz ,, 🥺🥰

33: My current relationship status single ✌️

34: My relationship with my parents im close to my mom but i dont really get along with my dad ,

35: Favourite holiday Christmas !

36: Tattoos and piercing i have no tattoos, 3 piercings in each ear (2 on each earlobe and 1 on the top on each side)

37: Tattoos and piercing i want I want a interrobang on my wrist and an Aquarius symbol on my ankle and MAYBE the joestar birthmark, i wouldn’t mind more ear piercings and i want a septum piercing but ive seen videos of them getting done and they make me squirm i dont know if id go through with it

38: The reason I joined Tumblr sdklgkjgh i had a my little pony roleplay blog before i made my personal account

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? no we’re good friends !!

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? no not regularly at least

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? no

42: When did I last hold hands? my mom tried to hold my hand when i was half asleep on the couch the other day but like i was so out of it so like it was more our fingers together and the rest of my hand just loosely dangling so if that doesnt count, you

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? i give myself about 2 hours if im doing full makeup but thats purposefully longer than i need so i dont have to worry about rushing and i can relax and take my time

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? no i only shave them if they’re gonna be showing or if the Urge to be Smooth comes over me

45: Where am I right now? my room at home on my bed

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? probably Kaylie cause she doesn’t drink and i assume if im drunk with other friends there she’d be the only sober one

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? Reasonable, if i have it too loud i cant think so the only time i have my music loud is if im doing nothing and want to Not Think

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? Ye

49: Am I excited for anything? short term im excited for the ai crushes all banks stream tonight and long term im excited to move into our apartment

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? no im not a tell everything to someone type of person .

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? i smile most of the time like, at work (before we wore masks) id always be smiling to look nice and like. just in general if i want to Not Look Unhappy or whatever

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? my mom probably like, yesterday

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? ive never kissed any1 .

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? nope i don’t think i really trust easily so like this doesnt rlly happen,

55: What is something I disliked about today? i woke up late cause i was up late last night so ive been tired all day I dont like the feeling

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? language barriers aside itd be super cool to meet hirohiko araki

57: What do I think about most? Whatever media im currently most into so right now adventure zone and magnus archives

58: What’s my strangest talent? umm i dunno im kinda flexable i guess ? not like ~contortionist~ level but like enough that i can freak people out sometimes

59: Do I have any strange phobias? i mentioned balloons as a fear in an eariler question so yeah that but im a lot better about it than i used to be

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? in front tbh

61: What was the last lie I told? i was on phones for the last hour and a half of my shift on friday and like. when people call and ask if an item is in stock and i can’t confirm it i, just tell them its not. like, someone asked if we had a specific kayak and i usually just search the walmart app or run over to where itd be to check but the kayaks are to far for me to run to and the app said limited stock which usually means little to none so , i just put it on hold for a bit then tell him we’re out.

62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? i like video chatting in theory cause its nice to see people visibly react to stuff but i tend to get too self conscious about how i look so i just do audio only

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? yes to both !! i am both

64: Do I believe in magic? yes in some ways i suppose

65: Do I believe in luck? yes im v superstitious

66: What’s the weather like right now? its a pretty good day its sunny but not too hot :oo

67: What was the last book I’ve read? its been ages since i last read a book in full 😔 i honestly dont knwo what the last one would of been 😔 😔

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? yes !!! love it

69: Do I have any nicknames? not anything i get consistently called no

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? ive never gotten super hurt that i can think of ??

71: Do I spend money or save it? save it

72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge? no

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me? doppio bean plush ,,,,

74: Favourite animal? hedgehogs!!!!

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? on my phone probably on tiktok or something waiting for jojo to come on toonami

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? I? dont think he has one i guess ??

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? butterflies by samsa but it makes me happy in the “im crying now” kinda way itss cute

78: How can you win my heart? just by being nice and respectful tbh ,

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? idk i dont really want anything fancy just my name (chosen name please god im so scared of dying and geting my birth name on my tombstone if that happens i WILL come back as a vengeful ghost) and my birth and death dates

80: What is my favorite word? saccharine

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr by my tumblr crushes (which its been YEARS since i looked at) ; frostios, 27names4tears, smollpurrito, happynaru, and warpedlamp

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? if we being real id just get so scared dsjkfsldjglg theres so much i could say i dont know :((

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? not ? that i know of

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? why are all the questions worded super basic except this one skdlskdjfj. Shape shifting

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? i can really think of anything really as long as a friend is asking i tend to answer truthfully ?

86: What is my current desktop picture? Sobble BUT this reminded me that i wanted to change it to a xenoblade pic so its this now :

90: Failed a class? no

91: Kissed a boy? no

92: Kissed a girl? no

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? no but oh god just thinking about that im 🥺🥺🥺🥺 id die id melt 🥺🥺

94: Had job? ye i was a cashier for a year in highschool and then i work in wamlart apparel in the summers

95: Left the house without my wallet? not when I know ill need it no, but ive left it home if im just going to a friend or family member’s house or i have my mom’s card or some cash in my pocket

96: Bullied someone on the internet? no !!

98: Played on a sports team? no lmao i dont do sports

99: Smoked weed? no

100: Did drugs? i had a weed brownie like once but it was such a small piece i didnt really feel anything

101: Smoked cigarettes? no

102: Drank alcohol? Ye

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? not currently i was vegan for a little bit to encourage a friend that was doing it though

104: Been overweight? no

105: Been underweight? no

106: Been to a wedding? yes three, my grandma’s when she got remarried, and both my brothers

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? probably yes lmao often

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? not TV TV but if netflix and the like count then yes

109: Been outside my home country? no :(

110: Gotten my heart broken? not ? really no

111: Been to a professional sports game? ive been to a handful of Yankee games

112: Broken a bone? no

114: Been to prom? yes i went to my highschool’s and a friend’s highschool’s my senior year

115: Been in airplane? no

116: Fly by helicopter? no

117: What concerts have I been to? none :((((

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? ye

119: Learned another language? i took 3 years of Spanish in high school but i wasn’t any good at it and dont really remember much of what i did learn

120: Wore make up? yes i do often :0

123: Dyed my hair? ye a lot

124: Voted in a presidential election? yes ever since iv been old enough to i vote

125: Rode in an ambulance? no

126: Had a surgery? dental surgery yes

127: Met someone famous? Not anyone i’d count no

128: Stalked someone on a social network? depends on what you count as stalking i guess but like not ever in a creepy way like ive been on people’s social media to find out stuff about them like. if theyre in a relationship or especially after highschool ill wonder about someone i havent talked to in awhile and ill see what theyve been up to and what theyre doing with their life and stuff

129: Peed outside? no

130: Been fishing? yes like once

131: Helped with charity? donation wise yes

132: Been rejected by a crush? ive never confessed to anyone and been rejected but once a friend told my crush i liked them and they confronted me about it and rejected me but it made me more mad at the friend that told them than it made me sad about being rejected because i knew it’d probably go like that and it justmade thing awkward between us for awhile 😔

133: Broken a mirror? ive broken the little mirrors inside eyeshadow pallets but i havent broken full ones

134: What do I want for birthday? usually just money lol or something thoughtful and cute

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names? i aggresivly do NOT want kids BUT hypohetically Elliot or Xander for a boy and idk what i’d nam a girl

136: Was I named after anyone? no

137: Do I like my handwriting? its messy so no not really but if im writing something for myself like a not or whatever i dont mind as long as i can read it

138: What was my favourite toy as a child? even as a little kid i always played computer games but other than that, this guy :

139: Favourite Tv Show? Jojo

140: Where do I want to live when older? New york or japan

141: Play any musical instrument? i can kind of play harmonica

142: One of my scars, how did I get it? i burnt my thumb kinda bad on the oven a while ago its still kinda healing but right now it looks like its gonna stay a scar

143: Favourite pizza toping? i like everything/suprieme pizza but if i have to pick one single topping pepperoni

144: Am I afraid of the dark? yes :((

145: Am I afraid of heights? mentioned it earlier but yes if im not strapped in or secured etc

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? no im so scared of being caught doing something bad that i just. dont

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? i mean yes but thats life babey

149: What my greatest achievments are ive gotten awards for grades and stuff but that boring BUT i got the english department award or whatever that was called im very proud of that

151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery i donate some and save the rest tbh

152: What do I like about myself i can be pretty sometimes 👉👈 im cute or whateva ,,,

153: My closest Tumblr friend i dont really havent “tumblr friends” aside from friends i know irl and also tey have tumblrs ,,

154: Something I fantasise about just. growing up and having my own place maybe with someone and. being comfortable and okay and not having to worry ,,

155: Any question you’d like? dkfjhdskhf japan :000

#ask #mine

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satoshi-mochida · 5 years

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Atlus debuted the first gameplay footage and new details for the Omega Force-developed action RPG Persona 5 Scramble: The Phantom Strikers during the game’s first official live stream today.

Here are the details:

General

Development is 90 percent complete. Fine-tuning is the focus from here on.

Many Persona fans in Omega Force are working on the game, who are bringing the game to quite the high quality level.

Persona negotiation is being naturally and strategically incorporated into the action.

Rather than simply being an action game where you rush about wildly, there will be a proper story with character growth and the like.

Some character models have been borrowed from Persona 5, while some have been newly created.

The game is being made to be received as one of the games in the Persona 5 series.

Whether Confidant or story characters make an appearance is still a secret.

You can unleash various actions through a combination of the Square and Triangle buttons.

There is also shooting.

When you summon a Persona, you can choose a skill with the up and down buttons. Also, the protagonist can change Personas with the left and right buttons.

When you summon a Persona, time will come to a halt. Since information about the enemy will be displayed, you can carefully choose the Persona and skill to match the enemy.

A Persona’s attack range differs depending on the skill.

SP is important. Strategies like striking the enemy’s weakness, or swallowing up a wide scope of enemies are essential.

When you shoot your gun, time will come to a halt. There is also charge shooting. Each character will have their own gun.

Depending on the battle, you can also escape.

With the “Phantom Move” ability, nimble movement and attack actions using background objects such as traffic lights and street lights are possible.

You can go from shooting to pursuing the enemy.

The concept of buffs and debuffs are also in the game.

By striking the enemy’s weakness, it will become a Technical hit and deal greater damage.

By lowering the enemy’s shield gauge, which is right next to their HP gauge, you can unleash One More and general attacks.

You can also summon a Persona while in mid-air.

You can attack by exploding a patrol car. It is a flame attribute attack.

“Show Time” is in the game. Since Joker can switch his Personas, he has different Show Times for each.

You can befriend Personas. Persona fusion is also in the game.

Story and New Characters

As the characters travel to the various cities of Japan, Atlus hopes to bring out aspects to the characters not shown in Persona 5.

They want to depict Phantom Thieves as teenagers having fun. There is a notion of wanting to reward the Phantom Thieves that worked so hard in Persona 5.

The setting consists of more than just the five cities that have been previously announced.

Sophia (voiced by Misaki Kuno) is a girl the Phantom Thieves meet in a different world. She cooperates with the Phantom Thieves in hopes of being a good neighbor to humans. Her codename is Sophie, and her weapons are a yo-yo and blaster. She specializes in recovery skills. She controls a being similar to a Persona called “Pithos.”

Zenkichi Hasegawa (voiced by Shinichiro Miki) is a public safety police officer. At this point it is currently unknown whether he will become an ally or not. Both Zenkichi and Sophia are heavily involved in the main story.

Game System

A “Baton Pass” system for changing characters is included. Change characters in real-time while striking the enemies weaknesses.

All-Out Attacks can be activated without stopping the flow of action.

Each character has different parameters, weapons, and play style.

Each character has their own HP, so switch up characters when you are in a pinch.

Character growth also affects strategy.

Enemies appear as enemy symbols on the map, and when you touch them, battle will begin. You can also encounter enemies by shooting them. Also, by successfully sneak-encountering enemies from behind the back or overhead, you can start the battle at an advantage as a chance encounter.

Sophie is a good character to use for beginners. She has a technical element that advanced players can also enjoy, where by connecting attacks with good timing, she can expand her power and range. She can charge her power with the Triangle button. Her charged shot can possibly paralyze the enemy.

Panther uses a whip. She fights with magic more so than power. Among her attacks is a fire attack unleashed by Carmen. By pressing the Triangle button, she can enchant her whip with fire to deal fire attribute damage and attacks. She can also enchant while attacking. She can also lower the enemy’s attack power with the “Tarunda” skill.

All of Skull’s special attacks can be charged. By charging, “Zio” can become “Mazio.” While it takes some time to charge, Skull can activate super armor to take hits without recoil (the damage is slightly reduced).

Strategy is an important element of battle, and it can be very difficult to win with power alone.

By lowering the down gauge in mid-boss battles, a special All-Out Attack can be activated.

Analysis allows you to check enemy weaknesses and parameter status. For example, when an enemy’s defense is lowered by “Rakunda,” you can check this information via analysis.

Boss battles can be made easier through debuffing.

During battle, a party member may suggest an attack at particular timing where they can unleash an effective attack. By following through on their suggestion, you will switch to that character as soon as the attack begins.

There is also an easy mode for users who only want to enjoy the story. Difficulty can be changed at any time during the game.

Atlus has also started a Persona 5 Scramble: The Phantom Strikers edition of “Morgana’s Report” monthly information drops. Here is the first:

A Completely New Story Set After Persona 5

About half a year since parting from each other upon resolving the mysterious incident that bustled society, the Phantom Thieves gathered again at Cafe Leblanc. While they were planning to enjoy summer vacation together, they wind up lost in an unknown world following an unexpected event. It was a terrible world where shadows snatched away human “desires,” ruled by the command of someone called King.

Mysterious “Conversion Events” sprung forth all over Japan. To pursue these incidents, the Phantom Thieves set out on an RV journey of societal reformation.

New characters that are key to the story will also appear, including Sophia (voiced by Misaki Kuno), a girl who lost her memory, and Zenkichi Hasegawa (voiced by Shinichiro Miki), a skilled public safety police officer.

Introducing Shibuya, a Place of Pop Culture

Shibuya, a place brimming with fashion and sub-culture, and where young men and women gather. At the fashion building Shibuya 705, an event will be held for popular artist Alice Hiiragi (voiced by Ayane Sakura), who is known for her unique fashion and music.

However, there is another side to the bustling city of Shibuya… In the heart of a Shibuya that has become a different world, a Shibuya 705 transformed to look like a castle stands tall, and the appearance of the city has changed significantly. Slip through traps and mechanisms made to obstruct intruders, mow down the shadows, and set your sights on Shibuya 705.

Super Stylish and Exhilarating Action

In Persona 5 Scramble: The Phantom Strikers, the members of the Phantom Thieves are playable. In addition to Joker, you can also fight as your favorite member of the group (except for the navigator).

There are various tactics, including summoning Personas and pursuing the enemy.

You can also dominate the battlefield in style with “Show Time” and “All-Out Attacks.”

Atlus also announced that if you have Persona 5 or Persona 5 Royal save data on PlayStation 4, or Super Smash Bros. Ultimate save data on Switch, you will receive the “Persona 5 Sound Set,” which includes the Persona 5 battle song “Last Surprise” and Persona 5 Royal preemptive battle song “Take Over,” which can be used as the standard battle music for Persona 5 Scramble: The Phantom Strikers.

A character trailer for Persona 5 protagonist Joker will be released on YouTube on November 5 at 18:00 JST.

Persona 5 Scramble: The Phantom Strikers is due out for PlayStation 4 and Switch on February 20, 2020 in Japan. Read more about the game here.

Watch the footage below. View a new set of screenshots at the gallery.

Live Stream Archive

31:32 to 40:09 – Gameplay #1

1:29:39 to 1:42:24 – Gameplay #2