#Also around the table goes:
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samssims · 2 years ago
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Offer. 
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hermitcraftx · 3 months ago
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The problem with a lot of traffic life interpretations in my opinion is they don't understand character foils or don't employ them in their writing. Grian-Martyn and Scar-Ren are genuinely pretty good character foils for a series that is not really scripted or planned out like a book is. I could go on and on about how they parallel each other and the similarities between them. Even the smaller details between the four usually match up
leaving the rant in the tags so I don't have a huge block of text again ueueue
#jamies bad posts#like a simple example grian is an “unwilling” (though we all know thats bs) bodyguard/protector of scar#while martyn is a willing protector of ren#but i was just watching rendogs first episode and he says that his plan is to first go around attempting to trade with everyone#and it just. it STRIKES me how similar scar and ren are#they both have tempers when called for they both go around playing a friend to all and trying to trade#fuck it in the first few minutes of rens episode hes chasing rabbits around the desert#like ren and scar are two sides of the same coin in the context of third life#thats what makes the dogwarts/monopoly mountain arc so INTERESTING#because they both have goals good and bad and when you watch the others povs each side looks so... intimidating. so different#its only when you get really up close you realize theyre the same type of person#like martyn and grian idk just watching them interact is fun. its really fun#the way martyn gave grian a diamond sword in third life to protect him versus grian doing that w etho secret life#i can mostly think of just the little details but like. come ON#GO WATCH THEIR VIDEOS. ITS SO UNCANNY.#ren and scar genuinely drive me insaneee it drives me insaneee#ok like rendog makes a business out of enchanting and do you know what scar goes insane every season afterwards trying to get#the FUCKING enchanting table#if u like watcher lore u also get the yummy fact that grian and martyn were BOTH on evo#like....#the watcher/listener parallels. idk#third life#3rd life#trafficblr#traffic smp#life series#grian#gtws#goodtimeswithscar#gtwscar
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bonefall · 1 year ago
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naruto as a whole is a fucking mess and i say thisas somebody whos read the entireseries 3 times over. “naruto is going to change the system! haha teehee never mind hes not doing anytning about the child soldiers and slave castes and the genocides.” “sasuke can be upset at his brother for committing a genocide but actually genocide against an oppressed bloodline is good if theyre getting uppity and its sanctioned by the government and also have a genetic predisposition to be evil so he should just get over it and be okay with it” “sakura needs to stop obsessing over a guy whos not even interested and become strong for her own sake. actually shes a housewife now”
kishimoto im going to blow you up with my mind
YOU GET IT
For real though I think what they did with Sasuke's arc was one of the most baffling fucking things I've ever seen. "Actually. Your brother who carried out a genocide loved you :( he only put you in the Torment Nexus for several days because uhhh he wanted you to hate him and not find out about the government who ordered it. Everything he ever did was actually to protect you. And Uchihas are actually kinda rotten anyway so it's good an entire GROUP OF PEOPLE died. Don't think about any babies or children who were also slaughtered btw uhh nope all of them were bad."
Sasuke: "Yes I understand. I will now rule the world through fear. Actually nvm Naruto won our fight so, my philosophy is gone now."
Thank goodness that Evil Sasuke killed the three Bad Government Officials before that point, though. We had this whole theme going about toxic structures, cycles of abuse, and how oppressive regimes can propagate themselves even when a leader is well-meaning... but, like, Naruto REALLY wants to be Hokage, so actually if you just kill these Three Bad Governors it's gonna be fine.
There is no need for systemic change. Slave castes and child soldiers are fine. It's ok as long as the president is blonde :)
#It also bothers me unreasonably. And HAS bothered me since I was like 15. That in the final--#--scene where sasuke finally lets Naruto Into His Heart he goes off about how they were both just Lonely Children Looking for Love#Like... no!! No actually! Sasuke's WHOLE THING was that EVERYONE was praising him as a prodigy#But that he was pushing away everyone around him because his brother put him in the fucjing torment nexus#It would have been more appropriate to talk about how THEYVE BOTH BEEN MADE INTO WEAPONS#For Naruto to realize (now that he is Useful to his war-obsessed society) that Sasuke was also undergoing a sort of dehumanization#It should be through THEIR GROWTH AS PEOPLE that they finally have a deeper understanding of each other#THEY DID NOT HAVE A COMMON ORIGIN#THATS THE POINT. THEY BECAME FRIENDS IN SPITE OF IT#iM FLIPPING TABLES#They had the opposite problem as each other but through self-imposed ostracization and proving one's 'worth' *NOW* THEY GET IT#But we cant do that bc you'd have to admit that Sasuke hada fucking point and wasnt just wrong the whole time#And that this system is ROTTEN and that Naruto shouldn't become Hokage but DESTROY THE POSITION#because dictators choosing dictators IS BAD.#They should have changed the government to democracy and then Sakura wins the first free election#Because she's actually deeply connected with the people of the fire nation especially outside of the capital city#For like her humanitarian work during the timeskip#And for being the disciple of Tsunade who was a respected leader#And then have a cute moment where Naruto and her banter about it. That she fulfilled HIS dream lmaoo#And also let the three of them be friends im beggign OTL#She gets over her crush on him and theyre just friends#Animeposting#I shouldn't have mentioned sakura now im yelling about naruto on the cat blog
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palaceoftears · 2 months ago
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Magnificent Century Rewatch: One Picspam per Episode
Episode 17: The Double Joy
-My dear mother used to say "walk barefoot on earth and it shall take away all your troubles and sorrows, earth shall give you happiness and joy"
-Your mother spoke well, one can only find peace in earth. But I'm not sure if it is on earth or in it.
#the quote is a little bit silly but it adquires seriousness when you know everything that comes later#especially because it's hurrem's mother's quote from when she lived in ruthenia. when peace was possible. when she was going to marry leo#and had her future all planned. and there was stability#but the joke is suleyman's. after all becoming part of his family is what brings that ambiguity to the quote for hurrem's story#as it could be argued she never found true peace. at least for the most of her life#but also suleyman speaks in general terms here. so the quote can be extended to all the characters and in this episode of double joy it's#even more significant. because peace it's going to go sooner than later. and the signals of future ibratice problems are already there#and just as the birds are partly symbolic of that temporal peace and joy in love for hurrem the gifts the marriage gets are very important#as well#this episode is just gifts gifts gifts all around#suleyman's necklace for hatice has the tulips of the dynasty and it's something ibrahim himself recognizes could never give her#she says she's always going to have it w her. tho i don't remember seeing it too much in her tbh sdfy#in the other side ibrahim gets a lot of gifts. but the one that reminds him of his origin is his father's ofc. and he says he will always#have it with him as well. and later he gets suleyman's ring [i'm w haticehurrem. this totally looks like a subrahim wedding asfg]#which goes to remind us that he's now officially part of his family as well. he returned but he converted again. and THEN there's the table!#and taking away the politic alliance it could signify. it is venetian. his mother's heritage is there. in all the palace. and in the same#episode hurrem mentioned her mother's saying. the dynasty [or at least the most conservative side represented by ayse] it's unconfortable#the converts are not only winning more power and getting closer to the family. but they're also bringing their cultures & traditions to the#*ba dum tss* table#there's more to the whole return/convert and how it shows in the ibratice palace especially later w the statues but if i ever write about it#it deserves a post of its own ofc [and prolly someone that knows what they're talking about more than me lmao]#noo why did i write so much 😭 i should've done a separate post this is a mess to be under an already long picspam#anyways there's other significant gifts as the clock that musti likes or mahi's lucky charm for selim. and also the ones we already knew:#the ibratice gifts together 💝. and these contrast a lot with the rest because it's something of their own. when the couple was separated#from dynastic or even ibro's family. will they ever find peace again? we'll see it in the next episode [i'm lying]#maybe i should organize this in a post of its own#magnificent century#muhtesem yuzyil#mc1picspam4episode
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waywardsalt · 6 months ago
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with my phantom hourglass replay, there are two things i noticed;
a possible theme you could glean from the game is action vs inaction, and i think it's especially prevalent before you even leave mercay the first time, with oshus frequently urging link to not go after the ghost ship, then to just wait until the broken bridge is fixed, and seems reluctant at every turn while link and ciela are more than eager to go and do something about this problem, and the people of mercay in general talking about things and their problems but never seeming to act on their fears or desires, as well as the mention that due to the ghost ship, very very few people are still sailing around, while linebeck is one of the only people we see in the game actively going after the ghost ship and still sailing around. i might make a longer post just talking more about the action vs inaction in phantom hourglass but i just noticed it a bit and thought it was a bit of an interesting sort of theme you could find in the game.
linebeck moves so fucking much. i think he moves more than any npc in the rest of the game. not just in his intro cutscene where he is very animated, just in how much he moves when just standing in his little idle post, it's damn near distracting when the camera is focused on him, he moves a lot. i don't think i've really acknowledged how much he moves, and it really gives the impression that he's antsy or eager to get going, both of which fit him pretty well with how he acts.
#phantom hourglass#linebeck#loz#legend of zelda#salty talks#imo the action vs inaction thing feels esp interesting to me when looking at oshus specifically. he and his world are in grave danger#and he knows it and he actively does nothing and even seems reluctant to let ciela and link go ahead and do something.#of course he comes around on it but it's very interesting. has he given up at that point? thats what it suggests to me#that hes like. joined the people of mercay in just lying down and waiting for other people to fix their problems or just. not do anything#otherwise on mercay you have that old guy in the bar who spends the whole game not leaving bc he doesnt want to face his wife#and she never goes to the bar to actually look for him and just talks about it if anything#the guy with the blue tunic talks a lot about linebeck and his ship and almost gives the impression that he really wants to talk to him#but yknow. doesnt. theres the women that tells you about docks being shut down and how linebeck is the only person who's showed up#the woman you see at the broken bridge who's just like oh well! time to wait til someone fixes it.#even the guy fixing the bridge iirc is like well fuck i gotta do it or else oshus is going to bitch at me abt it#everyone seems reluctant to act which makes for an interesting way in how our main crew stands out#it is less so oh theyve been chosen specifically for this its moreso they're the ones who are fucking doing something about this#for their own various reasons some of which are more selfish but theyre still doing something#will likely have more stuff to say when im done but ofc we have other characters in the game who have to do with this#anyways. linebeck is so animated all of the fucking time it's great i dont think theres any other character that moves as much as him#when he's just standing around to talking to link it's great. he's so ready to get going.#it works with him being an anxious mess and also with like. oh he's probably understimulated. you know he's got a nasty case of wanderlust#i can put it with the idea that he's understimulated and afraid to stim in public so he's just constantly moving#he probably drums his fingers on tables bounces his leg when sitting paces around switches the way he sits or lays down often#tbh this kinda fits in with him being one of the main characters who takes action moreso than a lot of other characters#his arc culminates in him taking action he's going after the ghost ship he's moving around the world the only issue is that one of the#actions he takes is running away from his problems literally n metaphorically (tho idk if facing the jolene problem is a good idea for him)
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marlowethelibrarian · 7 months ago
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I need you to tell me all about Project Cannibalism actually
Okay! So I have like 10 pages of worldbuilding just for this project, so if you wanna know something more specific, feel free to send me another ask!
Project Cannibalism is currently still in the planning stages.
The story takes place in Suya, a theocracy dedicated to cult of Suyo, a cthonic earth goddess, ruled by hereditary priestesses. Suyo was founded by exiles from the lowlands, banished to the steppe where most of them were killed by the harsher conditions at higher elevations, or by the nomads that lived on the steppe.
All living creatures have some kind of magic inside of them. Life itself is an energy that can be bent towards magical working. Usually this is expressed through alchemy- creating effects by brewing potions and later, by runesmithing. It can be a labor intensive process and biomes with more biodiversity have more options when it comes to alchemy. It is a useful technology that underpins most the engineering accomplishments on the peninsula.
The exiles discovered a way to use the magic of human life, amplifying another's energy through their own bodies to do bigger magic, bypassing the need for the process of alchemy. Other creatures can serve as batteries, but the closer the battery is to human, the more efficient the process. It is with this magic that they created arable land out of the rocky steppe and drove away the nomads.
You couldn't light a candle with the life of a cockroach, but with a another human, you can break up boulders, divert rivers, raise shelters, and only take a few years off of their lifespan.
The story for Project Cannibalism centers on a pair of identical twins, separated by birth. One raised in the temple of Suyo as a talented priestess, the other a genius alchemist that has run out of luck and time and realizes they have an uncanny resemblance to the up and coming priestess.... However, they find themself with more than they can chew, as the aging queen priestess and her heir are at odds with each other, and their twin is being groomed to possibly replace the crown priestess.
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loverboybrightsideghost · 18 days ago
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i guess i'm an adult now
#or at least a pretend adult allowed to sit at the big people table#studio party people talking about taxes and gas prices and explaining the electoral system and i'm like damn adult moment i guess#one guy really said with his whole chest SO WHO DID EVERYONE VOTE FOR#and everyone was like WOAH RULE NUMBER ONE OF THANKSGIVING (he's not american idk how long he's been here) NO TALKING ABT POLITICS#and so we just sorta talked around it but it was funny and interesting#people explained gerrymandering and the electoral college to him#funny cuz THAT conversation started cu someone else (also not american) goes 'wait there's one thing i still don't understand#about the united states' and all the americans went ONLY ONE?????#lmao#bluebird.txt#i literally played in front of them an hour ago and our studio is like mostly grad students#so it's quite easy to feel indimidated when i've been here for like two years and overall maybe eight years#while everyone else has like at least ten Real Career Years#but it was a nice little dinner party#its nice to be with people who are musicians and be people with them. if that makes sense.#being a musician around musicians is scary and intimidating. being a person who is a musician among people who are musicians#is nice#having friends who are musicians who are not your friends BECAUSE you are a musician is the best#so i guess just. knowing and feeling truly that people like to spend time with you#or in the very VERY least will have an innocuous pleasant conversation with you#regardless of your Arbitrary Goodness is nice#people can be nice and it's nice to know people like you ! and you like them!
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candyriku · 8 months ago
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finally getting a chance to work on chapter 15 today :-)
#shout out AS ALWAYS to people leaving comments!!!! you are keeping me motivated you are keeping the dream alive#for some behind the scenes: in the last few weeks i've been barely sleeping and it makes it very hard to write or even be in a good mood#i usually need 11+ hours to function and so like. 2-3 hours a night is putting me in a bad place both mentally and physically#and yes i realize 11 or more hours is like a silly amount of sleep but idk. it's just how i am. i go to bed early AND sleep in ahaha.#i've been falling behind in all my classes due to the sleep thing so writing for fun has totally been off the table lol#ANYWAYS#typing typing typing (this chapter will be a lighthearted one)#we all need some fluff and levity i think (and i need to give time for Riku to care for Sora even more and be like. wow. i love you)#I was struggling earlier bc i wanted to write both about how Sora has been hiding darkness from loved ones and needs to let them in#but also with the idea of sora feeling that he needs friends to have strength or value. and i kind of realized i needed to pick one#like maybe a better writer than me could have both of those things be addressed at once but for me i was like... I want Riku to comfort him#which goes against him learning that he's fine on his own. we can address that in a different fic. rn he is just sad and needs to know#that he can share that with the people around him. and that he's still loveable despite it all#also shout out to my gf for teaching me “love isn't something you deserve that's not what love is” like. i did not know that b4 her#so I asked her lots of questions for chapter 14 actually cause I was like. i want Riku to support Sora in the way you'd support me#cuz IDK SHIT ABOUT THAT i have always felt unworthy of love and like i had to beg people to stay with me until i got into this relationship#so i was like. judy. what is your wisdom. how do you care for me when i feel like my pain makes me unloveable. what would you say#So yeah shout out to her! I am off on a tangent now hehe sorry. thanks for reading if you read this at all!! have a good day :)#jtsys fic#updates
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sawvhs · 1 year ago
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loool hi you dont have to respond to this but i just wanted to answer ur questions in ur tags ^_^ i like to think its a small world and daniel and adam have bumped into each other kinda like amanda and he promoted wotg to daniel. so he checks it out but he kinda just goes for adam cuz i think they kinda become buddies after that. he was prob forced into getting merch by one of scotts bandmates tbh LOL. just fun to think about and then it makes it possible to think of apprentice adam and daniel interactions <delusionalism. but yeah loool i love making shit up about daniel hes so fun(heart hands emoji)
AH yeah thats totally the train of thought i was going down thinking daniel must have found out about them from a flier or soemthing.. Daniel being an honorary ‘sorry we killed your bastard cop dad’ member of the jigsaw squad is so fun to me esp in silly adam lives scenarios so i love that..
(sorry about the tag dump oops)
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puppy-the-mask · 2 years ago
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I tried drawing the ladies in the lmk style! Kinda, I just used my imagination instead of references tbh so it's more a mix of my style and lego. I also finally drew a human disguise for Connie! It's really leaning into the 'Little Sister' role with this form, they're so cute <3 The alt version includes Connie with Greener skin because I couldn't decide exactly how green I wanted them, I also hid the eye-shines to show off their eyes better. I want them to look normal at first glance but something about them is off, Like the inverse of the Mayor- they look a bit off but their personality and behavior is fine enough to keep suspicions down. Fiddle also has her shackles in the alt version besides being purple
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dbphantom · 2 years ago
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Hmmm lungs and throat pain. Don't like that.
#I stg if my mom actually has covid and gave it to me I'm going to be so fucking pissed#She's like oooohhh no it's just a sinus infection well girl I did not want that either!!!!#Grumble grumble I'm really annoyed I wanted to sleep in today and I woke up bc of the pain#Cruddy rambles#I wear a mask every time I go outside but EVERY TIME one of my parents gets sick guess who also gets sick!!!!#And guess who don't wear masks!! That's right... My parents!#I have not brought a single sickness into this house since I started masking. Meanwhile whenever either of them gets sick I'm always the#One who catches it a couple days after. It's miserable#I also go outside Very Rarely. My dad works in an office and my mom goes to the gym every single day except the weekends#And neither of them mask anymore. They genuinely don't give a fuck.#And it pisses me the hell off. Not only am I getting sick bc of it (and ofc usually worse than them) but that's a blatant disregard for#Literally everyone around them. And my mom had BEEN immunocompromised before. She just doesn't care about other ppl ig#Meanwhile at dinner last night my dad is like 'oyeah my coworker has had the flu for *ninety days* they dunno what's wrong with him'#And it doesn't click in his tiny fucking pea brain that hey. Dont fucking risk taking that here (bc he caught it from his niece apparently)#Granted my dad's probably lying bc that's what he Does TM but like. If he's not? Way to be a dumbass. Idiot.#And my mom is like 'oh yeah the gym owners bring their kid to the gym whenever he gets out of daycare for being sick and I love kids so I'm#Always going up to him like hi!!' and I'm sitting at the table like 'so. Let me get this straight. You knew you were probably gonna catch#His cold/whatever and you still went up to him without a mask or anything on' fucking brilliant aren't these two#YES I'm annoyed I'm sick I had Shit To Do this week. Fucks sake. I limit the amount I go out for leisure to like 1x a month and always mask#Meanwhile these assholes are going out and spreading disease like its NBD#Like what is the point of me even bothering when I live with these two. I still will but like. It feels so bleak#Eventually one of them is gonna catch covid and bring it here. They don't care about quarantining. Is it just going to be an endless cycle#Until eventually one of us finally gets unlucky and is hospitalized or dies? Like I genuinely don't know what it would take to get them to#Actually give a shit anymore. It's infuriating#I try to talk to them and they just laugh at me and shake their heads when I mask and tell me I look stupid and paranoid now#Maybe you should be fucking paranoid!!! FUCK!!#Why do I have to be sick because of your fucking negligence it's not *fair*.#I close my eyes and because I just slept the background radiation of my consciousness won't dissipate enough for me to fall back to sleep#Screams
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thattoxicshipper · 2 years ago
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Consider.
After a while, he gets bored of doing these things on his own, or with just him and Dani.
So…
He brings in all his other friends!
Tucker is Pharaoh, an expert hacker that hacks and codes circles around Oracle and Cyborg. He’s also an the avatar for the Egyptian Gods and a reincarnated Egyptian demigod who can cast magic on par with Dr.Fate and Klarion.
His evil deeds include computer viruses that absolutely bug out systems but only destroy truly malicious information and minor luck curses on people who he feels deserve good or bad things!
Sam is Nightshade, a vocal activist and slight eco terrorist. I’m a sucker for Sam getting plant powers from Undergrowth. Maybe Danny dropped her off with Poison Ivy when he first brought her with him, and she learned a couple new things, like growing plants that are extinct in their dimension.
Her villainous behavior is destroying slaughter houses and freeing animals from cruelty and captivity. She also viciously tears into organizations that purposely ruin environmental health. This often has her branded as the second most dangerous. She also makes community gardens for the lower class and the homeless and creates little shelters out of bushes or trees.
Valerie (because Val knows in this universe, because I’m also a sucker for that) either took a page out of Danny’s book and goes by Gray, or maybe goes by Rage or something. Either way, she’s a combatist and martial artist on level with the Bats, and she lets people know it. She’s considered the most dangerous.
Val’s misdemeanors are generally beating the shit out of people, like criminals, abusers of children, abusers of power, and the occasional rapist she can get her hands on. She steals great sums of money from rich assholes to donate to charities and organizations that support a good cause. She finds jobs for struggling families and gets them interviews.
I like the idea of Dani working with Danny. They can be Fenton and Fenton, or maybe Fenton and Nightingale, because Danny’s family’s full last name is FentonNightingale.
Dani’s record is just light thieving of things rich assholes don’t need that she can give to people, or things that can be returned to their original owners for a reward, and she gives them to the homeless. Donates a lot of money and supplies to homeless shelters, too. Where she got those last things is not something she’s going to tell you!
(she stole them from Vlad)
Maybe Jazz, maybe as Bo (like Bo-staff), or Dr.Fenton, or Analysis, comes through sometimes. The first time was to yell at everyone else for running off without telling her and making her worry. Maybe she fires a bazooka to get people’s attention. This is probably where the heroes realize the crazy/ gremlin/imp like behavior is a family thing.
From there though, she occasionally comes through to aid in Danny and Dani’s escapades. She likes to Psychoanalyze heroes and villains alike, the Gotham Rouges and vigilantes are her favorite. She doesn’t do the Red Hood, though, because she likes to flirt with him and make him flustered. She steals his helmet for the singular purpose of seeing him blush when she flirts. She also tells him she knows who he is out of costume. Like, she followed him home once because she was interested in talking to him. And just saw. And maybe he likes her too, but can’t communicate this with words or actions outside of seeking her out and staying around her when he could leave, because he’s a Bat, The Bat’s don’t do communication.
Clockwork sees how stressed Danny is from trying to be the goodest boy and never do anything remotely bad that could turn him evil and thinks he may have overdone it. At this rate his panic over never doing anything evil is going to force him to emotionally burn out and stop caring. Then he'll turn evil anyway.
So Clocky does something that sounds completely ridiculous in theory. He scoops Danny up and drops him into a universe full of superheros and villains and tells him to "Do whatever you want. There will be no consequences for you." Then he leaves.
And just like that, Danny goes apeshit. He decides to do the one thing he always wanted to do but was too afraid to because he didn't want to be judged, or worse, forced to join his parents.
He becomes a supervillian. Not as Phantom, no. But as Fenton! He goes full super genius mad scientist and terrorizes whatever city he's in. The local superhero is being driven insane as Danny builds death rays, shrink rays, his own modified version of the GAV, ect.
The best part if that the local heros can never catch him for long and when he is caught he always escapes before he is transported to whatever facility they wanted him in. He always ends up back in his home dimension where he goes back to acting normal and no one from either human dimension or the Infinite Realms knows what he's up to (except the stop watch of course)
After a particularly fun day in which Danny highjacks all broadcasting services to teach everyone in the world how to make insulin at home so you didn't have to pay a ridiculous amount for necessary medication, the Justice League was now on his tail.
Danny just laughs, thinking there's no way they'd ever be able to arrest him. Little does he know some guy calling himself Batman is leading the mission and he has no intention of arresting him. Danny, much to his horror, becomes far to familiar with adoption papers. As in he keeps having to set them on fire.
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starlit-mansion · 19 days ago
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i don't mind being killed first in commander, i don't mind having my goodies blown up or being seen as the threat when i'm not or anything
i do mind when i target something on someone else's board and they immediately start whining that they're not the threat :(((( that other person's the threat :(((((((((((( come onnnn no one's allowed to touch my stuff :(((((((((((((((((((
bro grow UP.
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asexualjedi · 25 days ago
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Wait shit tomorrow is thanks giving can’t a bitch get a god damn break huh.
#my aunt invited herself and her family over also different aunt then the one who broke in#and. like we were like we only want us here it’s going to be too hard on my mom#and then she was like well it’s okay it’ll just be me my husband and my daughter like girl#and then today after my mom fell and it was a whole ordea#she’s fine she keeps trying to sit on tables or where there’s nothing to sit on so like I had to catch her in my arms and she sat in my arms#like I was a chair and wouldn’t get up when I asked so I had to slowly lower her to the ground#more upset bc it was just me in the house and I can’t pick her up from the ground by myself like I can help her up from a sitting hit but no#not the floor#and it took like 10 m for my dad to get here#also my grandma is on the phone during all this im trying to like keep my mom from falling then im trying to like gently put her down then#im trying to stop her from hurting her self in her attempts to get up#and she’s on the phone with my aunt#I can hear my aunt#and im yelling#we are in the same room right she’s on a chair on the other side of the couch from where this is happening#and im yelling grandma#ask aunts name for help pls pls pls ask her if she can come help#and my grandma just keeps chitchatting and im like then I just go aunts name can you hear me hello#and im pretty sure like tm grandma told my aunt shout what happened but was like yeah it’s fine (my dads name)#is on the way he’ll be here idk mayeb thirty#and it’s like grandma I haven’t been able to call my dad yet#that’s like when he estimated he’d be back from his errand#then she’s like yeah we’re fine here (my moms name) just fell it’s ok#and then I finally go grandma hang up ps bc my mom couldn’t here me through all of my grandma talking and me talking and my mom crying#and then my aunt texts me liek you good and I call her and say can you pls come here I need help pls#anyways she was closer then my dad but still ended up arriving after him which is just classic her#she was late to her own second marriage which was incredible bc#she sang while walking herself down the isle you can’t be late if you do something bonkers like that#anyways after all thsi I go like we need to not have many people around they say only 1-2 people and my aunt goes yeah I know but it’s okay#it’s just going to be the three of us coming and it’s like girl the 1-2 includes my and my brothers and her husband can you count dog like
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29121996 · 2 months ago
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i prefer posting my thoughts on here i rlly get lost in some void n also i rlly .
#also all of u are just as weird or insane as mw on Some Level 💜#u dont survive on this hellsite qithout being a fuckijg OddBall .#anyway. met a guy wgi knew t1975 tn. he commented on my dhirt and asked my fav sonf#ACTUALLY he asked if my fav song was xhocolate#so i absolutely pulled out a deepcut (this must be my dream - IT is my top 5 so im not wrong#but being out knctje spot like that had me panixking#fav is avtually roadkill#but anyway his was cohoclatw but also guys whixb is Classic taste#he was so cool loved ralkibg tk him#sucked to not get his socials#also im not even . idc what it looks like w me leavinf not long after he does#to be fair i was starting to get bored bc i wasnt drinkijg + pool tables werent Free n it was gettibg Crowded#so i ended up leavinf like 10mins after he left . but i was overstimulatwd at that point#i knew my rwasoning for going up#i wasnt dissappointed . i canbadmit that to myawlf#embracing all the yuxkiness that i feel abt . this like the obessiveness and .#u I now what its doing some good for me in a weird way .#i am ashamed how deeo this well goes ill admit but . shame is a useless emotjon or wtv kurt said#god this show is fucmibg . its damaged my pysche but if ut hasnt . rlly made me take a look at some thibgs sometimes 🤺🤺#but antway . at a point where i can deal with this#and not be too bothered by his appearance or ppls opinions vc it Doesnt Matter. none of it rly fucking matters#its all fucking talk know oje knows SHIT Bt me ans even then i dont xare bc i know myself#well enough and i know . what i can do abd what im aiming for and all of this is just Muck i have to wash off#bc i know what haopenes and i know this inside out better than anyone (i literallt experienced it First Hand)#none of these bitches were even around when it was haopening too like thats whar has me kixking my feet some way#like . i Know these people. i Met them Several times over the last 3yrs. but to them??? i wasnt as Prominent#ubtil like . the last 8 months . maybe 9 .#and same goes w that fucker. not a lot of these ppl Met him until After we split last year lol#minus like . 2 i think? maybe 3 ?#anyway . wild.
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ame-to-ame · 4 months ago
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Rereading ayaka is in love with Hiroko senpai!!! Last time I read it I don't think it was finished/I didn't finish it but ack. Now I also want to be in love 😭😭😭
#i want to say i want to be someone like ayaka but in reality im probably more like hiroko#i used to be someone like ayaka. i was really tunnel visioned and i didn't consider much aside from the person i was interested in#but it's been years now and there's a lot more to consider and it's. hard and im even more scared now.#i think there's someone who im currently talking with who's trying to figure out if im into women or not and if im available or not#but it's that sort of thing where there's just. a lot in my shoulders and a lot to consider. i want a relationship eventually but.#there's just so much to consider right now. in the past i thought that as long as i could make my partner happy a rx is just btwn 2 of us#but when i did actually get into a serious long term relationship i realized that most people. do expect getting to have in laws.#people for the most part want to be loved proudly and not have to hide it. and i do too. but at the same time. i just. there's so much on me#i almost came out to my dad the other day while trying to console him. but maybe that news would just be the last straw for him. idk.#i just can't really afford to have my life be shaken up much more right now when i just rebuilt some stability.#especially when my parents are having a midlife crisis and both of them are leaning on me. my health worsening also stressed them out too.#i really thought I'd be braver and have less to worry about the older i got and the more independent i became but. ig not.#in my teens i told myself once i reached adulthood I'd be free to be myself and pursue happiness. in my 20s i tell myself after med school.#maybe once I'm finally out of med school and etc I'll have the opportunity to live my life. or maybe by then there will be another reason.#it's a real concern. i mean. sure I've never wanted kids I've always been ace and I've always liked women but. the societal pressure.#to other queer people the gaydar goes off easily but to the cishet audience i've mostly. been able to go unnoticed.#and when you're younger not having a bf or ppl you're interested in and being focused on your studies is a thing your parents are proud of#but as i get older. it's just been harder. i don't know how much longer i have before i have to conform or have the cat out of the bag.#i don't even get it sometimes. i really don't. the expectation of family and marriage is wanting happiness for your child right? but somehow#idk. idk. i really don't know. sometimes maintaining an image. might be more important than your child's feelings.#and i really can't be certain that between ego and saving face compared to me that. I'll come out on top. i really don't know.#idk. idk. i know there are ppl interested in dating me. but idk. i really need some time to process things through.#sometimes i ask myself how i would feel abt it and i really can't figure out how i feel at all.#it's ok to date someone u don't love ig. i mean. I've done it before. you can make yourself like someone after a while. but idk if i.#idk i just. i think im just really scared. and I'll need at least another month or so before anything is back on the table.#it's honestly just me running away from having to deal with sorting out thoughts and feelings 👍👍👍 which i eventually will have to face ig#but if i do fall in love ik i have it in me to sort those things out quickly i think. if im not too scared to let myself fall.#ig i just have to get more used to ppl being interested in me again ack 😭 it's easy to ignore it when dating someone but. now.#and it was fine in the summer bc i wasn't really around too many ppl my age. but. ugh. unfortunately. i do have. a face and a personality.#delete later
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