#Ah yes go complain on the internet because you need attention or some shit.

[azure-clockwork]

When you’re having a great day and then right at the end something goes wrong and all your happiness pops like a fucking soap bubble.

[softboywriting]

Christmas Together | Shawn Mendes

Summary: When you and Shawn head home for Christmas, you end up stuck in a snowstorm in a small town in the middle of the united states. With all flights grounded until further notice, the two of you will have to spend Christmas together at a bed and breakfast. This blizzard may just be the push that brings the two of you together with the help of a little Christmas magic. [fluff] [Christmas themed] [personal assistant to lovers au] [non au shawn]

Word Count: 6k

|Masterlist In Bio|

Traveling with Shawn for the holidays is never easy. He is possibly the busiest man you've ever worked for but you don’t mind because being with Shawn is just like being with someone you love, because, well, you do love him. Thanksgiving came and went, yours in the states not his, you don't go home for that holiday anyways. It's not a big deal for your family back home. Christmas is though and traveling three days before Christmas is a nightmare.

Things were going smoothly, you had a plan to get home before christmas. Things were going perfectly until the last minute. You had somehow gotten two tickets on a fully booked flight from Brazil to Canada. The plan is for you to fly straight to the Toronto airport, no layovers and from there you'll catch a cab home to New York. You're about an hour into the flight and you can feel some turbulence coming on. No big deal. Until the pilot announced an emergency landing somewhere in Iowa.

"Oh no...no no shit." You look out the window and see nothing but clouds. No doubt about it, you’ve flown directly into a storm system.

"What? It's fine, we're just going to be a little delayed." Shawn rubs your shoulder. "It's no big deal."

"No, it is." You lean your head back against the headrest. "My sister is having a baby today and I promised I'd be there. My whole family is going to be there for Christmas. She's the first of us to have a kid."

"Oh. You didn't tell me that."

You look over and Shawn looks concerned. He always has such a big heart for everyone, it’s one of the many reasons why you love him so much. "I didn't think you needed to know. It's not work related."

"Well yeah but I still care about you. I know I'm your job but like, I'm still a person who cares about you."

"I know...I know I usually tell you everything it's just been...I've been-"

Shawn lays his hand on yours and you look down at it, heart racing. "I've been difficult lately. I know and I'm sorry. Traveling and shows have been hectic the last few weeks. It's totally my fault you’re overwhelmed."

"No, Shawn it's fine. My job is to take care of all that stuff. I'm not- I shouldn't complain about it."

"So what's stressing you out if it's not me?"

"Everything about the christmas season. My sister having a kid, obviously but...mostly it’s that christmas sucks when you're single okay?"

Shawn's eyebrows shoot up. "Why?"

"Because every year I go home and my siblings all have their girlfriends and boyfriends or fiance's and shit and I'm the odd one out. Every year I become the center of attention at dinner, the butt of the joke during gift opening. It's just a pain in the ass being branded as the forever alone child in the family."

"Why is your family so mean?"

"They aren't. They don't mean their comments venmously, it's just little things that bug me. Little indirect jabs that remind everyone I'm single and I have been for a long time."

"Why are you single?"

You give him a blank stare. He couldn't be serious. He doesn't understand that he's the reason you can't be in a relationship? That your job of tailing him everywhere and managing his schedule and life is just as stressful on a relationship with someone for you as it is for him. "Shawn, I'm constantly traveling. When am I supposed to date? When am I supposed to meet someone?"

"Fuck." He groans and scrubs a hand over his face. "You're in the same boat as me. I didn’t even think of it like that."

"Yeah except I can't fly somewhere every time I have a few days off to see someone and make an attempt at one."

He shakes his head. "I've doomed you to be single. I'm putting you through the same stress I put myself through and it's not fair."

"It's not. But it's my job, and you have yours."

Shawn grabs your arm as the plan drops and shakes. "I'll make it up to you, I swear." His voice falters as the plane jerks violently.

You squeeze your eyes shut and he threads his fingers between yours, palm a little sweaty. "I don't see how but okay."

"If we make it through this I will do everything I can to get you a date."

"You're crazy Mendes."

"Yeah but you already knew that."

_____________________

The plane lands in one piece despite feeling like it was going to tear in half at any moment. As soon as you get to the airline club lounge you find out the flight is not just delayed but all flights are grounded for the next forty eight hours at least. Two days. You are definitely going to miss your sister's baby and you're possibly going to miss Christmas. As much as you don't want to deal with your family for the holiday, you're still going to miss them and you’re upset you might not be there.

"What're we going to do?" You ask as you slump into a chair beside Shawn. He looks over from his phone and you raise your eyebrows. "What are you doing?"

"I got a place to stay until we can get another flight."

"What? How? That's my job."

He chuckles and pockets his phone. "I can book a place. I know how to use the internet."

"Well yeah but- how? There was a hotel with rooms free this close to Christmas and during a storm?"

"Kind of. Every hotel I looked at was full but there is a bed and breakfast about half an hour from the airport that had a room."

You stand up and grab your bag and suitcase. "I'll call a car or taxi or something for us and-"

Shawn lays his hand on your shoulder. "I did that too. I got an Uber."

"Oh."

"You do absolutely everything for me. I figured I could return the favor since right now is really stressful for you."

"But it's my job...it's not a favor."

Shawn shakes his head and grabs his bags. "Come on, you need to relax. I read that this b'nb is super nice and the rooms have huge tubs. I know you like baths."

"What? How do you know that?"

"You travel with mini bath bombs in your shower bag and you always seek out the hot tub when we book a really nice hotel on tour." Shawn looks back and you jog to catch up to him. "I guess I’m a little observant?"

"What else have you observed?" You ask nervously, hoping he hasn’t caught on to the fact you have very real feelings for him. You’ve done your best to hide them for a long time.

Shawn holds open the door to the pick up lanes for you as you step out into the icy wind blowing snow everywhere. "Your favorite color is red."

"Why's that?"

"You rarely wear it but when you do, you are always more confident and you seem more comfortable. You always pick red when given a choice of things and your eyes always light up whenever I wear my red button down, so I know you must like the color at least."

"Maybe that's because it looks so good on you."

He smirks. "Oh yeah?"

"Mmhmm."

"Good to know." Shawn steps out into the snow and approaches a black car. "Come on, this is our ride."

_____________________

The bed and breakfast looks like a winter wonderland. It's decked out in decorated trees, wreaths, lights, the whole nine yards when the Uber driver pulls up. It has a little sign in the front that says Dover Inn. How Shawn found this place you have no idea. A short walk up to the front and you and Shawn are pushing your way through a heavy door into a small foyer that's been converted into a check in area.

"Hello!" An older woman with long dark hair says as she comes out of a back area. Her name tag says Judy. "Do you have reservations?"

"Yes, Mendes. We booked online." Shawn shakes snow off his hat by the door. "The first name is Peter."

"Ah, yes, here you are." Judy says, squinting at her laptop on the old wood countertop. "Let me go see that the room is ready. I'll be right back."

"Peter?" You ask, dusting your coat off. "Why'd you use your middle name?"

"I didn't want to draw attention to myself. You know how fans are, they always somehow find out where I'm staying."

"True. Smart, actually. But we're in the middle of nowhere Iowa in a town of probably a few thousand people during a snowstorm. I'm pretty sure that no fans are going to bum rush you out here."

"I wasn't taking the risk." Shawn pulls his hat back on and you shake your head at him.

"Mr. Mendes?" Judy says from the stairs behind the check in desk.

"Yes?"

"You booked a double room correct?"

"Yes."

The woman walks forward to the desk and types something into her laptop, chewing on her lower lip. "There is an error with room numbers on the site, the room you booked is a single room suite with a queen bed. We can refund you if you like. I'm so sorry."

"No," you lay your hand on Shawn's arm before he can say anything. "It's fine. We will take it."

Shawn gives you a look, silently asking if you're sure.

"You're sure?" The host asks, looking between you and Shawn. "I can at least give you a discount for the mistake."

"That will be fine, thank you." Shawn says softly and the host grabs your room keys.

On the way up the stairs you notice how beautiful this place really is. It's old, a historic building if you were to guess. A large manor like house of sorts at some time, but now converted to a bed and breakfast. Everything is decked out in Christmas, literally everything. Judy leads you to your room at the end of the hall and opens the door.

"We have pillows and blankets in the closet. There are heated blankets available on request. Breakfast is served at eight until nine every morning. If you need anything you can call the front desk by dialing star five five. Feel free to explore the inn, we have a large living room and the kitchen open to guests after ten in the morning. Can I get you anything right now?"

"No, thank you." You smile as you look around the gorgeous room. It's huge and spacious. There is a fireplace in the center of the far wall, lounge chairs flanking it with a small tree decorated in the corner. A large queen-size bed with a huge bed frame and two dark wood dressers sit against the opposite wall. There is a door on the left of the entrance for the bathroom and the right for the closet. It's incredible.

Shawn drops his bag on the floor by the closet and pushes his suitcase and guitar case up against it. "You're fine with sharing a bed?"

"Yeah? Should I not be?"

"Well I mean isn’t it a little...intimate?"

You laugh. "Shawn, I've been your assistant for almost two years now. I'm pretty sure that I can survive sharing a bed for two nights with you. It's just like sharing your bed with your best friend when they sleep over." You drop your own bag by the closet. "Don't worry about it." You say this, but honestly you’re not sure how you’re going to fare. Being close to Shawn is one thing, but sharing a bed is a special kind of intimate, whether sexual or not, you worry about how you’ll be able to keep your cool.

Shawn takes off his coat and flops down on the bed. "I'm sorry you're missing your sister's baby."

You hang your own coat and flop down beside him. "There's nothing that can be done now."

"What if we can't get home for Christmas?"

You look over and he turns his head to look at you. "We have each other?"

"Yeah, we do." Shawn smiles softly. "I'm glad I'm stuck here with you."

"I'm glad it's you too."

____________________

Sleeping with Shawn is better than you expected. To start, you thought he would be a bed hog like he is on the tour bus, sprawled out all over his bed at the back of the bus, but he isn't. The two of you put on pajamas and crawled in on your respective sides. It was a little awkward at first, both of you unsure if it was okay to move or curl up or anything really. You decided to break that barrier though, push the button and make a move because the tension was absolutely eating you alive.

You scoot over from the very edge of the bed where you are laying uncomfortably still. You turn on your side and face Shawn who looks uncomfortable as hell too. "Hey, you look like you're petrified."

"I don't know what to do."

"How do you usually sleep with other people in your bed?"

Shawn rolls onto his side and props his head up on his hand. "Well, usually I spoon them because it's someone I'm very interested in and have usually just been intimate with. Other than that I usually sleep alone."

"Uh huh. So is it the lack of intimacy before hand that's stopping you?"

His cheeks turn dark pink in the soft glow of the white lights on the tree in the corner. "I-I don't know. Maybe?"

"If you need to spoon me so you can sleep, you can. I don't mind." You lay on your back and roll so your back is to him. You pat your side, inviting him to cuddle up. It’s the worst idea you’ve ever had and your heart is threatening to burst out of your chest at the sheer thought of Shawn being pressed against you. But how else will you ever get to experience a Shawn cuddle? You would rather know and live with that knowledge for the rest of your life while you pine in silence until you find someone to settle down with, than never know and always wonder just what you may have missed. "I trust you Shawn."

The bed shifts and you can feel the heat from his body as he scoots closer, but not quite touching. "You don't think it's weird?"

"We've been in much more intimate situations I’m sure. I've seen you naked a few dozen times. This isn't a big deal. I sleep better with someone close and you do too it seems. Just cuddle me and stop being so nervous about it."

Shawn's hand rests tentatively on your hip. "You're sure you don’t mind?"

"Shawn. I swear, it's fine." You chew on your lip, voice surprisingly convincing despite your nerves.

Finally Shawn takes the plunge, wrapping his arm around you and pulling you back against his warm body. Instantly you melt, body completely turning to mush. It’s everything you imagined it would be and more. He’s just right, bigger than you, warmer, soft but not too soft. You let out a sigh and he presses his nose to your hair.

"You smell really good,” Shawn says quietly.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome, and thank you for letting me cuddle you. I hope you don't think I'm weird."

You put your hand over his against your chest. "I always think you're weird, but not because of this."

"I miss it."

"Hmm? Miss what?"

"Being affectionate like this." He adjusts himself so he is fully pressed against the length of your body, feet covering yours between the blankets.. "It's been a long time."

You close your eyes, nervous to say what you really want to. Worried he will know you're falling for him. Well...that you’ve already fallen for him. You did that a long time ago. "I don't mind if you want to do this. I mean...like, again?"

Shawn presses his hand against your chest gently, holding you back against him as if giving you a hug. "I just might have to take you up on that offer sometime."

_____________________

Morning finds you warm and cozy. There is a fire in the fireplace when you sit up and look around the otherwise empty room. Shawn isn't there, but the smell of his body wash wafts in from the bathroom that's open but dark. You look to the clock over the fireplace and it's just after eight thirty. You check your phone and you have no signal, of course.  

You stretch as you get up and go to the big windows on the far wall. It's snowing still. You doubt it has ever stopped. You grab the complimentary robe from the dresser on your side of the room and wrap up in it before heading downstairs.

In the dining area that's set up like a small restaurant would be with it's tables and chairs scattered around with families and couples sat in eating, you find Shawn alone by the fireplace sipping coffee and reading something on his phone.

"Morning," you say softly as you take a seat with your back to the fireplace. "How'd you sleep?"

"Like a baby. You?"

"Same."

Shawn puts his phone down and offers you his cup. "Coffee?"

"That's yours though?"

"Yeah but you can have some while we wait for the hostess to come by again." Shawn scoots the mug toward you. "I know you aren't sick or something."

You wrap your hands around the mug and lift it up to take a sip. Straight black coffee with a hint of sweetener. It's strong as hell and you swear you can feel it wake your senses up immediately. "This is horrible. How do you enjoy this?"

He laughs. "It's good?"

"No cream or something? It's like engine oil."

"Nuh uh." Shawn plucks his mug from your hands and takes a drink. "It's great. Oh, here comes the hostess."

You order some eggs, bacon and orange juice. Shawn asks for just some bacon and toast. You look out the window to see the snow reaching the bottom of it, drifted up from the wind no doubt. It has snowed so much you're seriously worried you may not get home for a while.

"What's wrong?"

"The snow. It keeps falling."

"Yep." Shawn turns and looks outside. "I told my parents I would be spending Christmas here. If I'm wrong, it'll be a surprise when I get home. If I'm right, they're not worried about me."

"You have signal?"

"Yeah. You don't?"

"No. Can I call my parents?"

Shawn hands you his phone and you excuse yourself to the living room where it's a little quieter. You dial your dad's cell number and lean against the wall near a tree.

"Dad? Hey it's me."

"Kiddo! Where are you? We thought you were coming home last night?"

"We had to land in Iowa. We're grounded for at least two days, but it might be longer. It's hasn't stopped snowing since last night. Did Penny have her baby?"

"Not yet. They said it could be any day now, I guess she wasn't ready."

"That's great! Well, not for Penny but I didn't miss it. Is she worried about me? Did she think I forgot?"

"No no, we figured you might have been delayed. Whose number are you calling from by the way? I didn't recognize it."

"It's Sh- the hotel's number. I'm using a landline."

"It's an out of country number? I thought you were in Iowa?"

You scrub a hand over your face and mentally kick yourself. You don't want to tell your dad it's Shawn's cell number but your lie doesn't make sense. "It's Shawn's phone. Promise me you won't give this number out."

"Shawn? You're traveling home with him?"

"Yeah, well, no."

"Honey!" You dad calls for your mom and you hear her respond in the background. "Our daughter is bringing home a guest for Christmas!"

"Dad! No! We aren't going to make it!"

"What's that dear? You're breaking up, I can barely make out your voice."

"Dad, we probably aren't going to make it for Christmas and I'm not bringing Shawn home. Dad, can you hear me?"

"You're bringing Shawn? That's okay! We'll see you soon!"

"Dad no! We aren't-" The line goes dead and you pull the phone away from your ear. The signal bars drop from three to none and you groan. Perfect...just perfect.

______________________

After breakfast you find Shawn in the living room with his guitar sitting with a little girl who has a cat piano that meows instead of playing regular piano notes. The girl is maybe five or six and you're pretty sure her grandma is the woman sitting a few feet away on her iPad. You lean against the archway that leads to the dining area and smile as Shawn let's the girl pluck a few strings on the guitar.

"You like music huh? What's your favorite?"

"I like the music from Frozen and Moana." The girl says and presses a key on her piano that makes a deep cat meowing sound. "I like Moana the best."

"Me too." Shawn smiles, playing a few chords. "I know the song How Far I’ll Go pretty well."

You shake your head as he smiles to himself. Of course he knows the song, it's one of Alessia's. Shawn looks up and sees you. He says something to the girl really quick and gets up, leaving his guitar on the floor.

"Hey, did you get to call your parents back after it dropped?"

"No, the signal keeps fading. I sent a few texts, hopefully they'll get them."

"Ah. Well...did you know you're standing under the mistletoe?"

"Huh?" You look up and sure enough there is a little sprig of green with holly berries attached to the archway. "No, I think you're under the mistletoe."

"No, it's definitely you and you know what that means."

"You're gonna kiss me?"

"Yep." Shawn leans in and kisses your cheek gently as you back up. "You're free to go now."

You roll your eyes and giggle as he steps forward and leans against the archway. "Oh no, looks like you're definitely under it now."

"Ah crap."

You stand on your tiptoes and kiss his cheek. "Looks like I was right all along."

Shawn laughs and turns away to go back into the living room. "I'll get you back for that, you lured me in."

"Uh huh. Sure you will." You head upstairs to find a movie on tv to kill time. May as well get used to it. You're going to be here a while longer.

_____________________

A little after noon Shawn finds you in the room curled up on the bed watching TV. You just got a text back from your dad saying that Penny had her baby. A boy named Lucas, eight pounds. You couldn't help but cry, disappointed you weren't there but happy that Penny had her baby okay. It sucks.

"What's wrong?" Shawn asks, sitting beside you on the bed. "Your eyes are red like you were upset."

"Penny had her baby."

"Oh! That's great, is she okay? Is the baby okay?"

You nod. "I'm just sad I couldn't be there for her. She's the first of my siblings and I to have a kid and I guess...I guess I sort of live vicariously through her."

"Oh."

"It's fine." You wipe your eyes. "Everyone is healthy. I'll get to meet the baby a little later. It's alright."

Shawn opens his arms and motions for you to come to him. You do, leaning forward until you're crawling into his arms. He holds you tight, rubbing up and down your back with his big soft hands. "Its okay to be upset. I understand if you're emotional about missing something clearly important to you."

You rub your nose on his shoulder. "Thank you. I'm sorry I'm crying so much."

"No, shh, you don't have to be sorry."

"But-"

Shawn squeezes you. "No buts, let it all out. You're always there for me on my bad days, I'm gonna be here for you."

_____________________

"Can I take you to dinner?"

You look up from your laptop. The inn has WiFi but it's not the best. You've just been updating schedules and trying to get any flight out of Iowa. So far everything is still grounded until the storms blow over. "Dinner?"

"Yeah. I was talking with some people in the living room earlier and they said that there is a place not too far from here that serves dinner through Christmas Eve. I thought maybe it'd get your mind off of everything."

"Sure." You close your laptop and get up to put on your coat. "Are we walking?"

"Yes. Wear your boots."

"Mmm and what are you going to wear?" You glance at his well loved chelsea boots in the corner. They're the only shoes he has with him aside from some tennis shoes made of breathable mesh.

Shawn grabs his boots and looks down at his feet, wiggling his toes in his socks. "I'll wear extra socks?"

"Mmhmm." You sit down and pull on your black leather boots that are possibly the best shoes you own. "Y'know you're a millionaire right? You can afford new boots just like those that aren't worn thin."

"I know. But these are comfortable, they're my boots."

"Right."

He groans as he sinks into the bed beside you to put on an extra pair of socks. "I promise I'll get new boots okay? But I won't get rid of these."

"Shawn, they're old."

"They're my favorite." He zips the side and stomps his foot down to adjust to the extra socks bulk. "Don't judge me."

"Alright, alright," you giggle. "I'll stop bullying you into getting new shoes. If they make you happy, that's what matters."

"They do." Shawn gets up and grabs his coat, tossing you his sweater he wore yesterday. "You might want that."

"I have a sweater?"

"The thin one that you wore yesterday? That's hardly a sweater."

"I didn't plan on being trapped in a snowglobe after leaving Brazil, a very non sweater climate. So sorry I didn't pack for a blizzard."

Shawn narrows his eyes and you narrow yours back. "I'm not going to take a human popsicle to dinner."

"Oh whatever." You snatch his sweater off the bed laughing as you pull it on. It's a little big and it smells like cinnamon and his cologne. So basically, Shawn. You used to wonder why he smelled like cinnamon, then you found out one of his primary vitamin supplements has cinnamon in it. It's supposed to help with metabolism or something. All you know is it makes him smell slightly spicy when he gets warm.

The walk to the restaurant is fairly short. It's just two blocks up from the inn. The snow is a pain to walk through and it's easier to walk in the street than it is to try and use the sidewalk. There are absolutely no cars out and about so you're pretty safe. There are a few other people in the restaurant when you step in, grateful to get out of the cold wind. You're glad you wore Shawn's sweater.

"So, if we are stuck here for Christmas, what do you want to do?" Shawn asks as soon as you're seated by the waitress.

"We're going to find a way home."

"I know you're trying but-"

You shake your head. "No, I'm going to find a way home. I missed Penny's baby. I'm not missing Christmas."

Shawn sighs softly. "Alright. We're going to find a way home. I'll get you home one way or another."

"We'll get us both home."

"Right. Enough about that though, we're supposed to be enjoying dinner and not thinking about all that." Shawn says, lifting his menu. "Look, they have a Christmas dinner option. Ham, potatoes and all the fixings. Sounds good."

You nod and try to focus on the menu. It's hard. You can't help but feel nervous as the day comes to a close. One day until Christmas. At least you're not alone.

_____________________

Just after two in the morning you wake up to a severe weather alert on your phone. The signal must have connected enough for you to get one. Shawn's phone goes off too, loudly buzzing on his dresser.

"What's going on?" Shawn asks sleepily, arm falling to your waist as you sit up.

"It's a severe weather alert." You read the message on your phone. "Blizzard warning. High winds may cause power outages across the state. Below freezing temperatures are in effect, be advised if going outdoors."

"Shit." Shawn mumbles.

"Shit is right. We're not leaving this place."

He pushes you back down and you curl up facing the windows away from him. "We'll be alright."

"This sucks."

"Mmm. I promise I'll make it up to you. It's my fault we're out here because I didn't want to leave Brazil until the last minute. I ruined Christmas." He sighs.

"Shawn, stop. You didn't ruin anything."

He cuddles you against him and presses his nose into your hair. "I'm sorry."

"You didn't do anything."

"I still feel guilty."

You grab his hand and he threads his fingers between yours. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything, but I'm not very awake."

"Do you think we were meant to be here, together for Christmas?"

"Hmm?"

"Like...never mind."

Shawn yawns and doesn't press the subject. He relaxes into you, his weight comfortable against your back. You close your eyes, really enjoying this moment despite the impending knowledge of being stuck here for the holiday. You and Shawn fit together perfectly, maybe a little too perfectly.

_____________________

Shawn is gone again when you wake up in the morning. It's after eight and you know you should get up and go get breakfast, but you aren't hungry. It's Christmas Eve. You don't want to get up.

The bedroom door opens and Shawn walks in, bundled up and carrying a bag full of wrapped gifts. "Good morning."

"Morning. What's that?" You point to the gifts and Shawn grins sheepishly.

"Presents."

"For?"

"You?"

You raise your eyebrows. "Why do you have presents for me?"

Shawn sets the bag down by the tree and unwraps his scarf from around his face. "Everyone deserves gifts on Christmas day. And since we're going to be stuck here, I figured we should make our own Christmas."

"You're not sad you can't get home?"

"I was, but I talked to my dad this morning. He said that Christmas is what you make it, whether that be with family, friends or your pets. He said that they will miss me, but he doesn't want me to fret over it. We can do Christmas whenever I get home." Shawn hangs his coat and kicks off his boots. "I'm lucky, because I have you and I'm not alone."

"I guess you're right. We are together in the same boat."

"Yep. So let's make the best of it."

"I suppose I should get up and go shop for you now huh?"

"You could. But let's have some breakfast first." Shawn holds his hand out for you. "Come on, there is cinnamon roll pancakes with your name on them."

"There is?"

"Mmm. I talked to the kitchen staff this morning. They said they would make them special since we're some of the few guests left at the inn." Shawn bites his lip. "I know they're your favorite."

"You're sweet." You curl your fingers around his hand and he lifts you up out of bed. "Too sweet."

Shawn hugs you tight. "You deserve it."

_____________________

Breakfast is amazing. The kitchen crew out did themselves with the cinnamon pancakes with sweet icing for you. Shawn ordered just eggs and bacon but they're also super good. Even the coffee is better than before.

Shawn reaches out and swipes some icing off your lip with his thumb. "Do you like me?"

"What? Of course." Your heart sinks, stomach churning. You know he doesn’t mean in a general way. "Why?"

"I mean, as more than your friend or job...whatever. I've just been thinking. The last few days have been some of the best I've had and-" He looks away, flushed. "And you and I have been kind of flirting a lot? Unless I've been reading this completely wrong."

"You like me?"

"Of course I like you." He looks back and fidgets with his fork. "You and I have had a vibe since you joined the team. I think I've been too nervous to admit it before now. I was too scared to shoot my shot."

You grab Shawn's hand and make him stop tapping his fork on the table. "Calm down. I like you a lot. A whole lot."

"Yeah?" He grins, chewing on his lip.

"Yes."

"Good, because I don't want to stop sharing a bed with you any time soon. You’ve spoiled me the last few days. I don't think I've slept this well since before the tour started." He chuckles to himself. "Remember when I promised you on the plane that as soon as we landed I'd find you a date?"

You giggle and he lines his hand up with yours on the table, palms together, his fingers curling over the top of yours slightly. "Yes?"

"Do you want to go out with me tonight?"

"But there is a blizzard warning."

Shawn looks around the dining room. "We can stay here, I can get hot cocoa and cookies from the kitchen. We can watch a movie or something." His fingers slot between yours and you squeeze his hand. "We can stay up until midnight like kids on Christmas."

"Alright." You smile softly and he looks back just as soft. "Let's do it."

_____________________

At midnight you and Shawn exchange gifts, not all of them, just one each. You had gone out and shopped at a small store in town that had all sorts of things for the holidays. You picked out a few things for Shawn, just little memorable trinkets. One is a keychain so you never forget this holiday and it says first Christmas, Iowa. It's cheesy but you don't care. The next gift you grabbed was a paracord bracelet the store had by the registers. It's black with a red stripe down the middle. You couldn't pass it up. Shawn loves his accessories and especially if they mean something or are a gift.

Shawn hands you a small box wrapped in brown paper first. "Merry Christmas."

You turn it over and give him a look. "What is this?"

"Open it and see."

You tear off the brown paper and open up the box. Inside is a little sparkly rose charm on a gold chain. "This is so cute." You lift it out and it is so ornate and delicate. "Where did you get this?"

"It's a secret." He smirks.

"Mmhmm. You did not buy this here.”

“You can’t prove that.”

“Oh yeah? I have access to your bank account remember? I swore I wouldn’t use it for ill intent but...and you told me you’d never lie to me when we first met.”

“Fine, I did promise you that. I got it before we left Brazil. I was going to give it to you at the airport.”

“Thank you.” You curl your hand around it and smile. “Your turn." You hand him a tiny bag with the bracelet in it.

Shawn opens it and slips it on. "I love it."

"I thought you might. I didn’t get you something cool in Brazil....and I know it's not much but-"

Shawn leans forward and kisses you, hand resting against your neck. Your eyes go wide and he pulls back.

"W-what was that about?"

"Look up."

You tilt your head back and see there is mistletoe hanging over the area in front of the fireplace where you're sat with Shawn. It was definitely not there earlier. "When did that happen?"

"I told you I'd get you back." He smirks and it dawns on you. The other day in the living room, the mistletoe.  

"You put that there." You laugh and he cups your cheek. "You...you put that there?"

"I did." He leans in and you take a deep breath. "And I did it because I needed some Christmas magic to give me the courage to do this." He presses his lips to yours once more and you slide your hand into his hair.

"Merry Christmas Shawn."

"Merry Christmas."

End

______________________

Thank you for reading! Please reblog if you enjoyed this and reblog to support and encourage myself and fellow writers. - A

*****Note: none of my works should be posted anywhere outside of my linked accounts. I do not give permission to repost with or without credit to my accounts. Please notify me of any reposted fics.*****

[cybernightwanderer]

“ My Reiki and Yoga New Free Soul Brother - Once an abuser manipulative thieve , money driven leach “

Well thats a big tittle to describe one person entirely. So my ( midle ) brother across my kid years and then teenager developing to adult, my brother was an interesting person. For example, in school my brother would pretend he didnt know me , and if i even dared to aproach him he would shame me in front of everyone, even thought they already knew i was his sister, i was bullied a lot in school so at the start i tried a few times reaching out to him , specially because i didnt have any friends and id always be alone. This motherfucker who was already a teenager completly dismissed me , BUT would actually seek me out or talk to me when he needed lunch money because he already “ spent his”, funny enough hed get mine to eat coz he didnt wanna use his, and if i didnt gave him even though i hadnt eaten , he would guilty me badly , and being the kid that i was , my brother was everything to me , even tho he didnt gave a shit about me.

So in consequence i started drawing a distance line between me and him, at home id start to distance myself and ignore him. And he started getting like a really attention whore, hed always annoye me , and force me to hangout, and i didnt he would threaten me or do some shit at the house and blame me for it , because my mother at the tinniest shit at home would beat the crap out of me , so me being the little kid that i was tired of getting beatings for no random reason , id play along. My brother would literally antagonzie me and scare the shit out of me while so. Everytime my family went anywhere , for example the beach, id try to go to the water alone for some peace this motherfucker would sneak behind me and try to drown me as a joke , like every 5 minutes, id yell in panic and my mom wouldnt do shit, eventually id end up actually chocking on water and  hit my head on the sand and cry the rest of the time. So yeah FUN ! Did my mom do anything ? ofc no , “ hes just playing around “. I had BD collections that id buy with my lunch money that sometimes id save up, disney movie cassettes and so on. Sometimes id have snacks in my room to eat when studying or something. My brother, being a full grown ass teenager that he was , would steal everything without me even catching a glimpse of it. My brother would “ borrow “ things without asking then hide them because he wanted. I had two final fantasy collectible caracters that i spent my leftover bday money on, and my brother would take it as his own. Yes because whatever birthday money i got wether it be 50 euros or even 20 from my grandma or aunt, my mom would take it “ borrowed” for herself with no justification, shed always say “ Ah lend me i need it  / or / I always buy you clothes and everythings, i buy you food , you owe me this , thats the minimum you could do / “ or / she would just take it without me knowing , she would inspect my bday gifts and take it before hand , the problem is that my grandma or aunt would always after if i was gonna save it up and id ask what and they would question what i did with the money and i would ask what money and blah blah , you get where this is going.

OH and if i didnt give my money the money she would beat me up ! wich is funny asf. My brother literally sold all my things behind my back, my original BDS, MY FUCKING POISON IVY STORYLINE BD, my disney cassetes , my collectibles, and my snacks he would steal and eat. If i had saved up money hidden, first he would try to borrow it and guilty me with the “ im such a good brother to you , you cant even lend me money ? i will pay you back, trust me “ ... ofc he never payed me back , but every two weeks he woul do this shit. And if i by any chance didnt gave him , hed just steal, or sell my things, wich regardless of me lending him , he would do it anyway. Fast forward to my early teenage years, i had to start working , i quit school because we entered that internet deth with my moms company, wich my brother also contributed to but let the blame to me ofc, i was already the punch bag of the family what is one more thing. My brothers were always my moms “ babies “ even tho one was already a full grown ass man and the other was already on his way. My brother did nothing at home , didnt take the dog outside, didnt take out the trash, didnt make food, didnt wash the dishes, didnt clean the house, basicly sit on his ass all day playing video games and eating, and selling my shit for money. My brother was unemployed for 3/4 years in between those i studied and worked at the same time , and did all the house chores, even if i had to walk the dog as 2/3 am after work i would have to, even tho my brother was in bed all day. My mom would literally yell at me and make my life a living hell and threaten to hit me if i didnt do it or even dared to complain. I would get home trying to study , trying to recorver at school ,and she would yell non stop until i didn every house chore, wich i would only manage to finish at midnight or later, and then id be too tired and unmotivated to do anything so id just sleep, and id always get late to class thanks to that. When my brothers started working, it was at my dads wearehouse, where i was forced to work too. Id work 8 to 10 hours , sometimes more, because we got payed by publicity stock packs, each pack was worth 1 euro, wich also 1 pack took 1 hour and 15/20 minutes to make. So if i wanted to make the day worth anything i had to rush , no eating breaks or pee breakes. My hands at the end of the day would literally be filled with newspaper and printed paper ink and dirk, and tons of cuts and sores , that would be leeched in paper ink, wich make it hurt even more at the end of the day, and was really hard to take it out. My brother would take breaks every 30 minutes to smoke , be on his phone or even go to bathroom or eat randomly, i wouldnt stop the 8 hours straight, and when i actually had to go to the bathroom or eat something because id get sick, my brother literally stole packs from me, or try to “ negociate my help for X “, the thing about my brother is that hed always try to negociate something , ofc it was always entangled for his own benefit and not both.

So it was like this my brother came up to me all excited and say “ oh if you do this to help me , ill split the profit that way we will make more and will be less exausting “ stupid like i was id always give in, specially because if i didnt  hed steal anyway.... Hed always change his methods and works, and guilty me if i didnt do it, so id always have to do so. If i didnt hed just change the pack registration list either way, without me even seeing it, and fake my signature, i only found out we had to sign an official paper a few months later when my dad asked, before that my brother would always tell me to note them on my phone then send the numbers by the end of the week, and since he was the bosses son , every one backed up that story ofc.  Eventually when i started to get older , i cut ties with my brothers and dad. And my ( midle ) brother was constantly trying to reach out and play nice and shit , also he was still working at the wearhouse . Anyway , fast forward when i got unemployed after the 5 star hotel due to rape attent and shit like that, i was unemplyoyed for 4 moths?! My brother tried to reach out , and even came home before my mother to try and persuade me to enter one of his schemes, i explained to my brother that i didnt have any money and that i wouldnt believe anymore of his stupid schemes and blah blah. He swore he was only trying to make up to me , and the plan was , i would pretend to work at my dads  wearehouse, but i would just be there 2 times a week and he would give me a cut of the protfit, coz if he didnt want my dad to hire some random slow guy, so he set up to do a two persons work, and give me 30 % of the monthy rate and all i had to do is show up a few times for my dad to see i was there, and then go home. That motherfucker insisted for 3 days straight promissing it wasnt a scheme and that he was serious this time. OBVIOUSLY THAT DIDNT HAPPEN OBVIOUSLY- with the last 10 euros i had, i bought train tickers to the wearhouse, the first week he actually stick to his word, a few days later the shit started, he actualy forced me to deliver shit and stuff. Wich for me was really difficult because its when i started to develop hernias, and the pain was too overwhealming, and that fucker didnt care and still forced me to, eventually i told him i was out , and found out he still used my name in his shit plan  and pretended i was still working there to my dad for two whole months , and then begged me to lie to my dad on the phone, hed literally call me before my dad trying to get me to lie, and promissing the money, and hed ask my mom to pressure my to help him. What could i do??!! what happend after you may ask? did my brother gave me the money? OFC NO ! NO! He gave me 115 euros of the cut , and he made 996 euros to himself. And told me it was only for the days “ i actually worked “  NEVER IN MY LIFE  I VERBALLY EVER SAID TO ANYONE , FAMILY OR NOT  “ I hope you die, you are shit , you are nothing to me , seriously i hope you die “ and acually meant it and wished it. For the first time in my life i actually wished so hard for my brother to just die. I was done, i was officialy done , i had never been so done with someone. I was officialy done with my family. I blocked my dad on everything, i told my dad to fuck off. I told my older brother to fuck off. I told my middle brother to go die. And the last person was my dying grandma who was a snob ass piece of shit who only gave a shit about me when i was a little girl ( because its only cute when they r kids  ), to stop trying to call me and told her to just go and die. She literally sent me a voice message of 5 minutes crying beggin me to see her, and i just told her to go and die, its not because she is dying that is gonna erase the fact that she didnt gave a shit about me after i actually grown. And the fact that i did this apparently scared the shit out my dad and brothes, specially because i did it so naturally. AND TO THIS DAY I DONT REGRET WHAT I SAID AND I STILL DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT HER. OH AND PLOT TWIST SHES NOT DEAD NOR WAS SHE DYING, LAST YEAR SHE TRIED TO SCHEME MONEY OUT OF MY MOM, AND BEFORE THAT SHE WOULD ALWAYS TREAT MY MOM LIKE SHIT AN CALL HER NAMES, FUNNY ! Now they try to sneak into my life really AGAIN ... ffs Since the end of last year, apparently my brother turned into reiki and yoga and shit and is now driving a motivational fuck page for people who wanna “ grow spiritually and open the third eye “ and is trying to reconnect with me again, obviously i cut him off before he could even talk to me. So he spent 3 months or so , coming here and trying, and since he didnt get anything since january and february hes trying to manipulate me behind my mother, my mother is venting to my brother about me being closed off to them , and my brother is DIAGNOSING ME AS A PROBLEM, BECAUSE HE IS SO WISE AND ENLIGHTED... WTF??? diagnosing me??? ur not a fucking therapist you asshole ! The other day i heard him tell my mother in the living room , that “ SHE CANT LIVE LIKE THIS ITS VERY TOXIC FOR HER, SHE HAS TO TALK TO YOU AND BE A BETTER SISTER AND DAUGHTER SHE NEEDS TO BLAH BLAH YOU NEED TO KICK HER OUT IF SHE IS LIVING OFF YOU  “ WHAT THE FUCK?? im living off my mother?? the woman that forced me to give her more than half of my paycheck, thats doesnt give me privacy or respect and that literally threatned me if i ever tried to leave that she would chase me down???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR SEND ME TO A MENTAL HOSPITAL????!!!! ... My older brother is doing the same, keeps trying to get me to go visit his kid, and to meet his kid, keeps trying to get my mother to see pictures of the kid or to call them. They keep trying to guilty me “ oh you cant take it out on the kid, its not the kids fault , he needs to know his aunt, you are his family “ BITCH FAMILY?????? FAMILY??? family doesnt mean shit. Yesterday even sent photos of his kid trought a new number LOL. I actually did went to the kids birthday, first time a few months ago, and guess what , my brother still the NO ONE ASKED- OPINIONATED asshole he was about my whole life, he literally takes one glimpse of me and judges my whole life and starts yelling shit at me ...ofc thats not gonna happend again. People dont change. People. dont. change. PEOPLE DONT CHANGE ! BITCH ?? WHAT? WHO THE FCK?? HOW THE FUCK??? In conclusion my brother is still the same piece of shit he was , and now even more narcisistic, and manipulative, he cant get what he wants from me , so now hes resourting to my mother again. I NEED TO LEAVE THIS HOUSE, I NEED TO LEAVE THIS FAMILY OMFG. Funny enough he does this shit then tries to get me to go to his house to celebrate his birthday because he “ MISSES ME AND THE OLD DAYS” ???? OLD DAYS OF YOU MENTALY ABUSING ME ? NOT TO MENTION THAT YOU ALMOST BROKE MY ARM BECAUSE I WOULDNT LEND YOU MY COMPUTER 3 YEARS AGO????? my mom literally told him we were gonna go there without even asking me if i wanted or even if i was gonna go. LOL, shes trying to emotionally manipulate me with older pictures of me and him , and games we would play together LOL. OMFG PLEASE SOME ONE, I DONT EVEN KNOW I NEED TO DIE OMFG... I CANT TAKE THIS FAMILY ANYMORE.

[anntar-radix]

Chapter 1 (cause I’m bad at naming conventions)

“You complete and utter jackass”

“Yea, I know, I know.”

It doesn’t help that a 15.7 gigawatt arc of electric energy moving towards us at an increasing rate.

I really need to stop attracting attention from these assholes. Oh well.

“… hope this works…”

Engage defensive protocols.

Engaged.

Caster plates in position.

WARNING : SUPPLIER ARMS IN COMPROMISED STATE.

Great. Just great. The one time I can’t fix them.

“You sure this will work?!”

“Probably.”

“WHAT DO YO-”

Cast Nullify(type : Electric)

Supplying myst to caster plates.

Casting.

The plates started to dissipate the myst. Not even a tenth of a second later, the arc hit the electrical barrier that I cast up.

I smirked “Make that a yes.”

“Not. Funny. You jackass.”

“Oh get a new insulting name would ya?”

The barrier started to strain. That can’t be good.

“Once you make sure that wall of yours won’t fail on us.”

“Fair ‘nough.”

Return MystReservoir

5020326

Return MystConsumptionRate

-53.6

Not bad for a few gigawatts hitting this.

Override Nullify.Usage(100)

Overriding.

The bluish barrier solidified.

“That should hold.”

Quidel glared at me.

“What do you mean ‘should’?!”

“Oh, lay off it. You know I never deal in definitives.”

He just pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head.

“You jackass.”

“I know. That’s the third time you called me that in the past thirty seconds.”

And for good reason on his part. I keep dragging him into this shit that I find myself in. And yes, I know that I’m a bad friend. I’ve heard that comment too many damn times. Half of them from Quidel. Yet here he is.

“Do you know the quickest way to the top?” I asked, mainly cause the last time I tried to lead us anywhere, we ended up halfway across the continental U.P.. That was an interesting ride home to say the least.

“I’m trying to get my bearings, but it’s quite hard when you have several billion watts being thrown at your head.”

“Welp. Could ya hurry up?”

“Not helping, jackass.”

“Four times now.”

“Still not helping.” Quidel sprinted towards the rocky wall behind us. One dull thud later, the wall fell to reveal a small, steep tunnel going up towards the surface.

“Going up?” he said with a smirk on his face.

“About time”

And we both took a mad dash up the tunnel.

“You going to disable that barrier?”

“Let it run for a few minutes. It’ll slow ‘em down.”

“I’d still love to know why the hell they’re after you.”

“Do you want that in a list form or an MLA format essay?”

“When can I get that essay?”

“How good is your internet speed?”

He shook his head. “Really?”

“You think I’m joking.”

“And you wonder why I worry whenever you attempt to do anything.”

“First of all-”

“Don’t even start that spiel and look ahead.”

Light. That’s a good sign. Or a very bad sign.

The tunnel let out to a grassy field. Another good sign.

And then I saw ten humanoid figures marching towards us. Okay.

With weapons. Less okay

Pointed straight at us. Well shit.

-----

Well now that I got your damned attention, hello, bonjour, hola, guten tag, jambo, any number of other greetings.

If you found this, I probably destroyed the world at some point in the past. Probably. I make no guarantees or promises as you could recall. This transcript was made in an attempt to preserve some amount of the history of this place. Earth, the rock orbiting the star we call Sol, the stone we call home, was in quite the strange situation. You see, this planet, inhabited with all sorts of wildlife and the such, had a sentient type of animal called Humans that discovered – or rediscovered, one of several times, if you want to get into semantics – magic. Magic lead them to great things. Great things that improved life as a whole, or destroyed it all the same. Depended if the human was an asshole or not. Oh, and just to clarify, I’m one of these. I guess I just called myself an asshole, but, to be fair, I probably deserve all of the horrible names you could throw at me. Though the name that most called me by is Amadeus, meaning “love of god” – yes, I know its translation is ironic to what I probably did to the world.

-----

“Deus, what shit-pile did you drag me into?” It sounded surprisingly calm and low-voiced.

“All of them, knowing this damned organization.”

“I still would enjoy knowing what the damned organization is called.”

50 meters away currently.

“Ask ‘em then.” I said, pointing towards the merry band coming at us. Their weapons aren’t drawn at least. Maybe I could’ve had them wear ugly Christmas sweaters, then they could’ve be considered merrier.

“Something tells me they aren’t very sociable.”

“You have a better idea then smashing them to base elements?”

“Redirecting that pestering tank’s firepower.”

“I doubt we’d be able to trick them with that.”

A sharp crack of gunfire hit my ears and a sharp pain erupted from my leg. Well at least I know they have some people with good aim.

Pain Siphon Activated.

Still hurts like hell. Upgrade from bloody hell, but nonetheless.

“You good?”

“What do you think?!” My voice basically dripping with venom. I hate when Quidel starts this crap.

He just smirked “Well then it’s time for some fun.”

And just as quick as the smirk appeared, a blade, about 15 centimeters in length, came into his right hand. He raised the blade with a deathly glint in his eye.

“Step any closer and you’ll all be dead before the foot hits the grass.” His voice echoed around the field.

And of course a single soldier decided to take him up on his offer. Quidel’s blade sliced over his own arm quicker than the blink of an eye. The bodies that remained dropped to the ground with a nice thud.

“Did you really have to do that? You could’ve tried to talk to them.”

“Talking doesn’t require weapons and I also gave them a warning that they just straight up ignored!”

Before I could protest, he put a finger over my lips.

“No. You know that line is a straight up lie you like to tell yourself.” We both heard a gunshot in the distance. “Come on,” he said lifting me up “let’s get you home before you complain more about me killing people.”

-----

Ah, Quidel. My one longest lasting friend. I still don’t know how we came to be in the same group of friends, but life seems to baffle me in every single aspect of it. Including the fact that it needs to end. I suppose I should tell you what I know about him, though I think he does a better job at explaining himself. If not, I’ll try to tell you about it.

-----

Well… It isn’t home but at least he tried to get me in someplace that isn’t on an unending cycle of attempts on my life. The poor girl at the desk must have been terrified when she saw two random idiots walk in, one of which has a bullet in the leg, the other with a slice across the arm. As Quidel walked towards the rooms, I gave her a bit of a tip for the inconvenience of dealing with Quidel. And to a lesser extent, me and my bloodied leg. Hopefully the bleeding will stop before I have to sleep.

*****

“Son of a -”

A spark cut me off. It seems the universe is having fun cutting me off from talking today.

What sparked this time.

“Oh… great. Just great.”

That’s going to be at least a couple hundred to repair.

“What broke this time?” Quidel asked while watching the TV. Something along the lines of a house-building show by the looks of it.

“The bloody supplier arms.” With a side of incoherent muttering.

“Aren’t they made of some custom forged osmium-iridium alloy that you bragged about?”

“It’s a carbon-titanium alloy and because it’s a custom blend, it’s gonna cost a ton to repair. And it just fucking shattered.”

He glanced over. “Doesn’t look shattered to me.”

“The joint is, asshole.”

“How much?”

I took one of my several magnifiers to get a closer look at the damage.

Cracks everywhere along the spherical joint. Structural damage to the internal supply system. Large chunk of the joint is flat out missing.

“5, maybe 6 hundred.”

Quidel nearly choked on his cup of coffee. “Holy fuck. Do they want your liver to go with that?”

“Knowing my suppliers, they’d rather have more cash.”

“Don’t you think you could use something else less pricey? It seems like a chance to get a new and improved material out there.”

“As tempting as that sounds, I’d rather have my gauntlet made from my current alloy.”

“Still. You don’t have unlimited funds”

“I know, but you aren’t the one footing the bill. I know how to be thrifty, you know!”

“If only you would be willing to protect yourself then you wouldn’t have to repair the gauntlet as often.”

“I am.” I grumbled

“You really aren’t. You try to be but your refusal to let any blood be on your hands is preventing it.”

I glared at him and he just glared straight back. I knew he was right. The fact I refused to allow anyone to die at my hands was a hindrance to any attempt at self-defense I made. I just can’t bring myself to kill someone. To take someone’s life, it’s just… not mine to take.

“Says the one with a healing focus.” I finally managed to speak up.

“And I’ve taken my Hippocratic Oath and lived by it.”

“Then why do you kill the innocent?!”

“Those people aren’t innocent!”

“How would you know?!”

He just got up and huffed out the room, slamming the door behind him.

The silence in the air just reminded me of how different we could be. Me, the pacifist. Him, the military supportive healer. Both valid stances on the topic. One day, one of us will be proven wrong. But today was not that day.

[layla256]

Key to Her Heart Chapter 3/52: Wants and Needs

A/N: Chapter 3! I was actually really excited to write this episode because I wanted to talk more about the different characters besides just Spike and Buffy, who were pretty much the main focuses of the last two chapters.

For reference, in the universe, Giles never becomes a Watcher because of his dark past. Instead he continues to study magicks while assisting the Council on a consulting basis only. We also get to see a bit more of SoleSlayer!Faith in this one.

I know a lot of people really like Faith, and I know she gets redeemed in season 7 and some in Angel, but funny story . . .

So I got to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer on rented DVDs from Hollywood Rentals, and yes, I type this knowing I’ve dated myself in the process. We didn’t have any kind of streaming subscription because my mom was scared of entering her card number on the internet, and the episodes only aired while I had dance class, so I only had access to the first four seasons of Buffy for years, and none of the seasons of Angel. Meaning that, from middle school until college, I never saw any indication of a redemption for Faith.

Now that I have seen everything, I don’t hate her nearly as much, but she still sets off a lot of red flags for me as a character, and I know I’ll never really get over those several years of thinking of her as the girl who took over Buffy’s body and slept with Riley using it. Then again, after watching seasons 6 and 7, I just generally don’t like anyone past season 5. They kind of become assholes.

The prompt this time was:

“You really think this is a smart idea?”

“Nope.”

“Good. I’d be concerned if you did.”

And that, to me, just reeked of the Angel-Plan. I should be posting the fourth chapter tomorrow at the latest!

. . .

Giles was totally wigging, and Buffy was worried. It’s not that Giles never wigs. He’s in a constant state of wigging, but there was something different about this panic-fest.

And Buffy wasn’t just saying that because he went to Faith instead of her. Either way, that seemed like a problem/conversation for after Giles was being hunted by the demon of the week.

“Look, B,” Faith said, brushing off Willow and Buffy’s concern with a wave of her fingers, “We’ve got this, all right? We’ve got a whole plan and everything. Once we get the big bad demon out of Ms. Calendar, it’ll jump to Angel who can fight it off with his own demon. Then it’ll be dead, your would-be watcher can play his Get Out of Hell Free card, and everything’s five by five.”

For a solid ten seconds, Buffy considered bashing Faith’s head in with a four by four. It probably wouldn’t stick (Slayer healing and all), but it would certainly make her feel better about the situation overall.

“And Angel’s sure he can fight Eyghon off?” Xander questioned, raising a disbelieving brow. “Doesn’t he have a big ‘I can’t fight my demon without curse-y help’ problem?”

This was apparently the worst thing Xander could have said because Faith was immediately in his face. “Angel’s more man than you can manage to be Harris,” she growled. “Way more. So just shut your breakable face and stay out of our way.”

“Not gonna happen,” Buffy declared, drawing their attention to her. “If it was just Rayne, I’d say go ahead, but it’s not. If Giles is involved, we’re all involved.” Stepping between the Slayer and her best friend, Buffy made sure her voice was firm and clear, almost mimicking her mother when she threatened a grounding. “There’s no version of this where we don’t get involved. Got it?”

Faith looked like she wanted to argue, but Amy cut her off. “Let them tag along Faith,” she sneered, looking down at Willow and Buffy over her nose. “See how actually protecting the Hellmouth looks for once.”

Big talk for a girl who got possessed by her own mother the year before, but Buffy wasn’t enough of a bitch to throw that in the other girl’s face. Just barely.

“They don’t need to,” Jesse complained, glaring daggers at Buffy. She held back a scoff. Frankly, she much preferred him glaring daggers than staring at her tits.

“I don’t care what you think,” Buffy growled. “That ‘would-be-watcher’ is our friend, and we’re not turning our backs on him and just hoping you three aren’t gonna toss him to the wolves to save your own asses.”

Faith scowled at Buffy, chest puffing up in aggressive arrogance. “Fine. Just remember this: your ‘friend’ got himself into this mess, and he came to me to get out of it.”

“Only because he didn’t want us in danger!” Willow protested, looking just as annoyed as Buffy felt, but Buffy put a hand on her shoulder to calm her down. They needed each other.

In the end, everyone agreed to run home, lie to Mommy and Daddy, and make it back to the library for the main event.

Except Buffy didn’t go home.

. . .

 “Have you lost your bloody mind you stupid bint?” Spike growled, prowling carefully in the shadows of the refinery with a furious look on his face. “This close to fucking sunset an’ you walk to a demon nest like you own the bloody place!”

“Giles is in danger,” Buffy said quickly, pulling Spike out of his wrath. “Some Emo-thingie demon is chasing him and they’re main plan hinges on Angel beating it.”

Spike stood for a moment, blinked twice, and sighed heavily. Something he seemed to be doing often in Buffy’s presence. He held no malice for her pseudo-Watcher, but he was getting a little tired of this white hat that kept getting dropped on his head.

Still, it seemed the man cared for Buffy at least.

. . .

 Spike had been enjoying luring some idiot blonde named . . . Melody? Something like that. Name didn’t matter, just that she was stupid and full of delicious human blood. Suddenly though, his meal was out of his arms and a crossbow was pointed at his chest.

He looked up, expected the Slayer or one of her annoying little shit friends, but instead looked at the face of a furious Would-Be-Watcher. Rupert Giles looked like a bloody demon hunter the way he was decked out, not a hint of tweed in sight. Yes, he looked every bit the man willing to fight his own battles.

Odd for a Watcher.

“What the fuck are you planning with Buffy?” Watcher growled, tightening his grip on the crossbow.

Spike was honestly surprised. From his own experience with Watchers, he assumed that they weren’t even allowed to know a curse any worse than damn. More and more, this man was moving up in Spike’s esteem.

It didn’t mean Spike wasn’t going to kill him, but he’d at least do it in a respectful way.

“Ain’t got a problem with the girl Watcher,” Spike finally said, putting his hands in the air. “She an’ Red are fine by me. Know better than to piss off a couple of witches.”

Watcher obviously wasn’t buying it. “Ah, yes. That would be why you murdered the entire Frat house they partied at last night then. Angry you missed your intended dinner perhaps?”

Now that was a line crossed. Spike moved faster than the other man could see, knocking the crossbow out of his hands before slamming him into the nearby brick wall.

“Now you listen ‘ere,” Spike snarled, face deformed into his usual demonic visage. “Now, I like me a good slaughter. Screams every which way, blood soakin’ the soil. Get’s me all touch-y feel-y with the Brit deep down in me.” His mocking smirk turned into a frown, “But I don’ touch girls like that. Any bint comes to my bed comes willin’ or not at all. That’d be your boy Angelus’s schtick.”

The Watcher’s face, now red from a lack of air as opposed to anger twisted in disgust. “Not . . . my . . .” He didn’t finish, but he didn’t have to; the point was made clear enough.

“Ah, you don’ like the lad either then. Good, then you’ll understand.” He lessened his grip. The human wouldn’t be able to escape, but he’d at least be able to breathe. “I don’ do the ‘rape’ bit Angelus was so keen on back in the days. Don’t let my boys do it either. They know better.” He looked down, focusing on the water puddles at his feet. “Those bastards at the Frat should ‘ave as well.”

Suddenly, he released the Watcher, pacing in front of his gasping form. Spike’s hands clenched and unclenched while his fangs pricked at his lips. His demon howled angrily, demanding blood and retribution. More than had already been taken.

“Buffy an’ Red, they’re good chits, yea?” he asked, turning to stare at a shocked Giles. “Genuine good ones. Ya don’ see that shit often. Girls that strong or kind. Showed some kindness to a soulless shit like me. An’ what’d they get for it? Bunch of arrogant fuckin’ shits slippin’ ‘em roofies and—and—”

Spike couldn’t finish. Much like Buffy the night before, he couldn’t seem to get the words out of his mouth, seeming to find them caught behind his fangs. He kicked at the wall opposite the Watcher, watching the bricks breaking under the force.

It didn’t make him feel better.

Not like their blood had.

“They—” it seemed Giles couldn’t handle it either, staring at his knees in disbelief as he knelt on the filthy ground of the alley. “Those repugnant little cunts,” he finally ground out, knuckles white as he gripped his hands tight. “I’ll—”

“Whatever you wanna do Watcher, I promise I did it already,” Spike said, face fading back to his human image as he came back to himself, shoulder slumped and heart still heavy. “Every damn thing I could think of.”

Giles nodded, standing up and brushing his knees as that good, old British upper lip kicked in. “I’d best check on them then,” he said. Though his stance and face were neutral, the shaking in his voice belayed his true emotions. It seemed the git genuinely cared for the girls, unlike the actual Watchers of Spike’s past.

The two began walking away, Spike not feeling like a meal after having his stomach turn the way it did. “Thank you.”

The words stopped him. Spike turned around, shock on his face as he stared at the still neutral Watcher. “Wha?” he said, not understanding.

“I said ‘Thank you,’” Giles repeated, picking up his crossbow, but not pointing it at Spike. “You defended my . . . charges when I could not. I may not approve of your methods, but . . .” the words were left hanging in the air.

Watcher may not approve, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t grateful in the end.

 …

“How’s Peaches ‘sposed to help you lot then?” Spike asked, taking out a fag to pull on so Buffy couldn’t see his worried face. “He’s killed plenty o’ demons ‘fore. Sure even a poofter like him’ll be alright in the end.”

Buffy shook her head, not looking convinced. “Faith and her merry band of muck ups think it’ll be a great idea to have him get possessed by the demon and fight it back with his demon. You know, like a shitty WWE match that no one wants to see.”

Spike almost choked on the puff of smoke he pulled in, saved only by the fact that he didn’t need to breathe in the first place. “You really think this is a smart idea?”

“Nope.”

“Good. I’d be concerned if you did.” He threw his finished fag into a puddle nearby, biting the inside of his lip in thought. She was right to be concerned. Angelus couldn’t control his own demon, let alone another. Either he’d keep his own demon too far at bay and lose to the interloper, or he’d let it loose far too much, and Spike doubted that good ol’ Angelus was all there after a hundred years trapped with a soul.

“I’ll let them try, though,” Buffy admitted, folding her arms over her chest. “Faith is the actual Slayer. Even if she doesn’t act like it half the time.”

Spike snorted. The Slayer acted it often enough to get on his last bloody nerve.

“But I want you there, in case something goes wrong.”

He stopped and stared at her for a moment. Want. It was an odd word to focus on, one he rarely heard in reference to himself. Drusilla had needed him. Needed her Dark Prince to shield her from all the dark monsters that prowled their world, but she had never wanted him. No, she only wanted her precious Daddy. Anything she said differently, he knew, was either a momentary delusion or an attempt to placate him.

Buffy though—Buffy meant it.

“I’ll be there.”

 …

 Spike was almost disappointed to see his Grand-Sire manage his feat, pouting at the thought of a lost fight. Still, he figured this was for the best. Watcher was safe and sound, Buffy had been appeased by his mere presence, and the Slayerettes had no idea about Buffy’s “special friend”, meaning they wouldn’t be giving her any kind of hell.

Catching her eye as she carried a harried Watcher between herself and the Whelp, he gave her his signature smirk before sinking into the shadows, glad to see her smile in return before he disappeared from sight.

She hadn’t needed him tonight, and, deep down, he was sure both of them knew that when they’d come up with their little “Plan B”.

But she had wanted him there, and that was the important part.

...

The part about want vs need was added in completely last minute, but I loved it so I kept it. I recently had a talk with a friend about relationships and how some people prefer to be wanted over needed and vice versa and how that can say a lot about a person. 

Spike always seemed, to me, like the kind of person who would prefer to be wanted. In my headcanons, going to those awful parties was a requirement for both him and the hosts out of polite obligation. No one but his mother ever really wanted him around, meaning she was the only one who ever gave him positive affection. As a result, I think he spends the rest of his life and unlife chasing that dragon; wanting to  be wanted.

[ixiethepixiewrites]

Synesthesia

Rating: G

Warnings: Some existential shit in the beginning, no real warnings, pre-relationship usukus

Summary: The colors had left him, so what would it take to bring them back? Rockstar AU

A/N: I was reading an interview with the lead singer of Panic! At The Disco and his words really resonated with me and pushed this out of my brain shjbjdhsj it started as just me writing my feelings but turned into a fic. Hope you enjoy. A little piece of my soul is in this one.

Colors, words, shapes. Alfred could see them all, and it was beautiful. When a song ended and changed to the next track, new colors appeared, the shapes melted into other forms, and words twisted to become something entirely different. That was how he had always seen the world when he listened to his favorite bands, when he wrote songs on napkins at coffee shops, or when he rode on a bus with headphones in. The music always took him somewhere new, a burst of colors that followed him wherever he went. When he had tried to explain this to his friends, they had looked at him like he was crazy, and he had to laugh it off. Pretending it was a joke hurt him, his insides twisting uncomfortably. No one would be able to understand.

Those long years in high school had turned his colors gray, the shapes vanished, and words no longer came to him. He’d lost all interest in his music, choosing to focus on things that his friends would like better. His guitar sat in his closet, untouched. The drum set he used to bang on? In the garage, gathering dust. Every year, the colors faded even more, and had all but vanished by the time he was graduated. Life had become a chore, nothing brought that same feeling back to him, but at least his friends and family were satisfied. His parents were proud of him for giving up his dreams and going for the dreams they’d picked for him. His friends enjoyed the sports they played together, urging him to play professionally. Naturally, he did as he was told, but all the joy on his face had become fake. His smile was forced, the laughs were hollow, yet no one seemed to notice.

Laying in bed, watching the ceiling fan rotate slowly, Alfred reflected on his life. What was good about it? Others would say he had it all, but was that really true? Did he really have it all if it all felt so empty? The tears started small at first, but as the weeks turned to months, more came out, spilling forth in tidal waves of blue. He wrote the first song in years, a testament to the pain that stabbed at his heart, gut wrenching feelings that awoke within him after so many years of being crushed and put to the side. He tore that paper in half, leaving it in the bottom of his closet with the other remnants of his old joys. It was too painful to look at them anymore, to see that reminder of happier times, when his joy had been real.

TV flickering to life at his command, he numbly watched the news, wanting noise to drown out the words in his mind. Oh but it never worked, they would always be there to haunt him when he went to sleep, stealing the rest from his body and leaving him drained by the time he had to wake up in the morning. The weather rolled by in a blur before something caught his eye. A man in a torn up punk rock style shirt who was flipping off the cameras. Arthur Kirkland, the name scrolled along the bottom of the newscast. Then a miracle happened.

Music played on the TV, video of this man’s concert, and something caught in the corner of Alfred’s vision. There was another flash to the side, and he’d seen it for sure that time! It had been green, he was sure of it! The video clip ended and he desperately waited, hoping that the music would play again, or perhaps the name of the band would be shown. When he had no such luck, Alfred turned to the internet, the saviour of his ignorance. Typing in the name Arthur Kirkland had led to a plethora of interview pages, but one particular name stood out. “Black Rose Tea...”

The name echoed in Alfred’s mind as he typed it into a video site, praying for results to show up. Blessedly, the band did pop up, album after album showing under the search results. He chose a song at random, listening to it while he lay on his bed. The colors graced him with their presence, shapes and words joining in and nearly making him cry from the feelings they evoked. He’d found them again, after so many years, his words and colored shapes had returned to him. The feelings within him were overwhelming, but he just kept playing songs, listening to each and every album, desperate to get more of that beautiful imagery flowing before his eyes. At around four in the morning, he ran out of songs to listen to, but that didn’t matter anymore. He had what he needed, and he was ready to give up everything he had to keep a hold of it.

The weeks rolled by as normal, but he now saw the world in a different light. Everything seemed brighter, happier, or maybe that was just him? The colors radiated so strongly, music filling his very soul and making his smiles feel less and less empty. When the news was announced that Black Rose Tea was coming on tour in the USA, Alfred had stayed up for 48 hours straight just to buy VIP tickets for the venue closest to him. He spent all the days before the concert preparing, unable to hold back his excitement, no matter how many odd looks he got from teammates and friends alike.

The night of the show, he was eagerly bouncing on his heels backstage, ready to see the band walk by and to their dressing rooms. What he saw soon after nearly broke his heart. The drummer of the band had walked out, leaving a fuming Arthur and a shell shocked Kiku Honda behind. Did they have a backup? From the looks they were giving each other, and their hushed tones, he figured that it was a no. Biting his lip, Alfred glanced warily at the large bodyguards, before he inched closer to the rope that kept the fans back. When he figured he was close enough, he realized he had no way to get their attention. That was when he remembered what he had brought for Arthur to sign.

Hurriedly, he pulled out the sheet of paper, the one that had the song of his sorrows on it, then scribbled a message on the back and balled it up. With a quick prayer to any diety that would listen, he threw the paper, hitting the singer on the back of the head. Surprised by the sudden hit, Alfred could soon see the glare he received from the rocker. Thankfully, the band’s other member, Kiku, had chosen to pick the paper up and unfolded it carefully. In black ink, the note read: ‘If you need a temporary drummer, I know how to play all your songs.’

Arthur took the note and read it, then he eyed Alfred warily before calling for security to bring him forward, all while the other fans nearby whined. Clearly they had not seen that fight as Alfred had, because they chose instead to complain about the concert being late to start and cutting into their autograph time. Holding up the note, Arthur raised an eyebrow at Alfred skeptically.

“Do you really know them all? Even the most recent release? It’s only been out for a month--”

Alfred nodded his head quickly. “If you give me sticks, I can prove it. I just... I just wanna help. I saw what happened right here and I know all these guys will definitely be upset if you had to cancel just because Francis is being a drama queen.”

That comment earned a snort from Arthur, who was now smirking. “I like you already. Follow me, we’ll see if you have what it takes to handle this job for one night. Can you sing?”

“Uh, I mean, I’m nowhere near as awesome as you, but I think-”

“Flattery gets you nowhere kid, can you sing?”

Alfred felt his cheeks redden in embarrassment. “Dude, you’re only a year and a half older than me, I’m not a kid... and yeah, I can sing.”

As they stepped into a closed off rehearsal room, Kiku politely handed the paper back to Alfred. “You write well. Is this a song?”

“A songwriter, hm?” Arthur snatched the paper before Alfred could, and read it over.

That was it, Alfred’s life was complete, Arthur Kirkland was actually reading his song, oh sweet jeebus have mercy was it hot in here? Face as red as Kiku’s base, Alfred couldn’t help but fiddle with his jacket sleeves. What would Arthur think of his music? Surely it would look amateurish compared to any real singer, but Alfred figured that it at least had feelings to it.

When he was done reading, Arthur’s eyes met Alfred’s, a startling green staring at his own blue with surprise. The words that left his lips caught Alfred off guard.

“You see them too?”

That very same green that filled Alfred’s soul with every song of Arthur’s he’d listened to, it was in his eyes right now. The world had come to a stand still, and Alfred could only numbly nod his head in affirmation. Yes, he did see them, he had for the longest time. “Your music brought them back to me. My whole world had lost color, but when i heard you, I- I could see again.”

A small, genuine smile was the response, and Alfred swore his heart had stopped in that very moment. Those beautiful eyes stared into his own and he felt a whole new type of color flow through him. It was one of the most glorious feelings Alfred had ever been lucky enough to experience. It may have been only infatuation, but it was a start.

“Come on, lad, we have a concert to perform. What’s your name?”

“Ah-uh, Alfred Jones.”

“Alfred, hm? Welcome to the band.”

Arthur handed the paper back after writing something on the top. It was a single word, one that Alfred had never heard before, and yet he knew what it meant already. A word for the things he saw when he was in the music, feeling it, breathing it, living it. Loving it.

Synesthesia.

Synesthesia is a neurological condition in which a person experiences "crossed" responses to stimuli. It occurs when stimulation of one sensory or cognitive pathway (e.g., hearing) leads to automatic, involuntary experiences in a second sensory or cognitive pathway (e.g., vision).

[finn-nelson-for-the-win]

Changing Priority- Chapter 14

So I meant to post this yesterday, that way I would spread posting 3 new chapters over the span of 3 days…but after work and whatnot yesterday, I was way too tired to edit and post this. So yeah…I hope you enjoy this chapter and as always, thanks for reading/reblogging/liking/following/etc. and just basically boosting my ego and inspiring me to keep writing and posting for you all.

Chapters 1-13 can all be found right here!

Unfamiliar Territory

 Rae had spent all of Friday after she got off work trying to recover from her hangover and catch up on sleep, cleaning, and Netflix binge watching that she had been neglecting for the past week; however, this left Saturday as Rae’s only free day to run some necessary errands prior to the new semester of Uni beginning on Monday.

 After spending a couple hours tending to the plants in her garden on campus, Rae walked to the Campus Bookstore to purchase all of the necessary textbooks that she needed for the upcoming semester, at least according to her professors.

 Nine books…nine FUCKING BOOKS!?! ALL FOR ONE CLASS?

 “Ugh, you have to be shitting me…” Rae mumbled, earning a chuckle from one of the student workers at the bookstore that was restocking the books on a shelf a short distance from Rae.

 “Do you need help finding any of your books? I see you’ve amassed quite a collection already…” asked the short, lanky boy as he took a short break from placing books on the nearby shelf.

 “Uhm, yes, actually! This book right here, ‘Art Across Time: Volume B’…I know you guys have it brand new to purchase or rent, but do you have any used copies to purchase or rent? This one book costs more than I was planning to spend an all my books this semester, combined!” Rae replied incredulously.

 “Yikes, yeah, that book is a pricey one…unfortunately, if it isn’t on the shelves, we don’t have it. If you don’t wanna pay this much you might be able to find it online for cheaper, but I wouldn’t bet on it…”

 “Ah, I see…well, thank you anyways.” Rae said politely as she debated purchasing the book now or taking the risk of being unable to find it online.

 “Sorry I couldn’t really help, but let me know if you need any further help…”

 “Don’t worry about it and yeah, okay. Thank you!” Rae added, giving the worker a friendly smile, before deciding it best to get the textbook now regardless of the price.

 Rae walked out of the aisle of alphabetized books sorted by course titles AIS through ART and found an unattended counter to set down the growing pile of books she had been carrying to give her arms a rest before pulling her cell phone from her purse.

 Rae opened up her mobile banking app to ensure that she had enough money in her account to purchase all the textbooks she would be needing and gasped audibly when she noticed her account balance.

 Holy shit! It looks like the direct deposit from my tuition refund finally hit my account!

 Rae breathed a sigh of relief because her hard work the previous semester had paid off and she had not only received a high enough GPA to maintain her academic scholarship, but also to qualify for the tuition assistance her job offered. Between the two scholarships, Rae had more than enough money to cover all her expenses for this semester while still having a decent amount of money left over.

 Rae knew that it was already getting late and the bookstore would be closing soon, so she sighed and picked up the stack of books she was going to be purchasing before walking to the opposite side of the store.

 Well…so much for that tuition refund I got…

 Rae waited in line for the next available cashier to ring up her purchase and tried to mentally prepare herself to spend roughly three paychecks worth of money on a total of twelve textbooks.

 ***

 Rae had been putting off thinking about the current situation between her and Finn with some success over the past day and a half, but as she began the nearly hour long walk back to her apartment with her recently purchased textbooks, her thoughts began to wander.

 In a much more sober state of mind, Rae was not nearly as affected by what she had discovered while browsing Finn’s Instagram as she had been Thursday evening on the floor of Izzie’s kitchen, but she was still confused.

 As much as I love Izz and Archie, they’re too emotionally invested in Finn and me becoming a thing to give me a straight answer about all of the questions holding me back from making the first move with Finn.

 I need an unbiased opinion in the matter…

 As the sun continued setting, the chilly January evening air began to set in and Rae found that she was less than halfway to her apartment and her fingertips and the tip of her nose had nearly lost all feeling.

 I suppose I have nowhere else to be tonight, so I have some time to spare…

 Rae crossed the street a short distance up the road and walked towards the café that she had been frequenting for the past couple months. When she walked inside, she skipped the line that she would normally stand in and decided to grab a table and warm up a bit more before putting in her order.

 Shit! What if I see Eric the Barista today…will it be awkward?

 Rae pushed the thought to the back of her mind after a quick look toward the counter where the only employees she could see were a number of girls around Rae’s age and the man in his mid-forties that Rae has always assumed to be the owner or manager of the café.

 The warmth was slowly returning to Rae’s fingertips and rosy cheeks as she skimmed through the various required readings she had purchased or rented for all her classes. When Rae began to feel bad about loitering at the small table in the far corner of the café as she people-watched and took advantage of the coffee-scented warm atmosphere that had a vague familiarity to Rae, she decided that if she wanted to stay any longer, she needed to order something.

 Rae stood from the table and left all of her belongings behind to save her spot as she walked up to the counter with her credit card and cellphone in-hand.

 “Hello! Can I have a hot chai latte with soy milk?” Rae said to one of the female baristas behind the counter that she often saw when she came in before work most days.

 “Sure thing! For here, I’m assuming, since you have all your stuff over there, huh?” Rae chuckled and nodded as the barista entered Rae’s order into the machine in front of her, “And your name is…wait, I know it…don’t tell me…”

 “Rae!”

 “Seriously, Eric? I was just about to guess that!” the Barista jokingly complained as she wrote Rae’s name on the order.

 “Hey, Jessie, this drink is on me today…” Eric said to the barista that had taken Rae’s order as he walked up to the counter and gave Rae a toothy smile that made his simple steel lip ring stand out against his impossibly perfect, white teeth.

 “Ah, you’re too late, buddy!” Jessie replied as she handed Rae the receipt and her credit card back, “You’re all set, Rae. We’ll call your name at the other counter when your order is ready!”

 Rae thanked Jessie and gave Eric a small smile before walking back to her table in the far corner of the café.

 Almost as soon as Rae had sat back down and put her card back into her purse, she heard her phone buzz a few times against the table where she had set it down and she pressed the home button to unlock her phone.

Chloe: So guess who I just finished FaceTiming that is apparently much more up-to-date on the situation with your sexy coworker than me, your best friend for nearly a decade…

Chloe: No guesses?

Chloe: Abbie! I feel so out of the loop…is this punishment because my family went to Italy for Christmas and I couldn’t come visit you like we had considered back in August?

Rae: No, that’s not it at all. It’s just a lot to tell you about via text and I’ve been really busy with work lately. Plus, last I heard, you didn’t have internet access, so I didn’t know that FaceTiming or video chatting was an option for you.

Chloe: I was dying without internet and I felt so dead to the world, so I caved and paid a fucking insane amount of money to get wi-fi at our hotel for the rest of the week.

Chloe: We leave tomorrow, but maybe we can FaceTime tomorrow? Or once I’m back home if there’s a day we are both free? I want to know everything!

Rae: Yeah, I don’t know when I’ll be free since my classes start on Monday, but I’ll let you know.

Rae locked her phone and dropped it into her purse before sighing and covering her face with her hands.

 Chloe is probably the last person I want to discuss the whole situation with Finn with until I figure a few more things out.

 Rae was brought back from her thoughts by the sound of someone politely clearing their throat to get Rae’s attention. She lifted her head from where she had been resting on her hands to see Eric the Barista standing behind the chair opposite of her with her latte on a small plate in one hand and a small platter of various pastries in the other.

 “Oh! Were you calling my name? I didn’t even hear you, I’m so sorry…” Rae replied with an embarrassed smile as she removed her elbows from the small table to allow Eric to set down her drink.

 “Don’t worry about it! When I finished making your drink I saw that you were busy on your phone and I had a spare moment, so I decided to just bring your drink directly to you and greet you properly,” he replied with a shrug after setting her latte down before continuing, “I also wanted to drop these off for you…”

 Eric placed the small rectangular platter down on the table as well and Rae soon realized that the platter had a small slice of coffee cake, banana nut bread, and lemon poppy seed cake.

 “Oh, I didn’t order those…” Rae mumbled.

 Though they DO look really good…

 “I know, but I thought you seemed a little out of it today and thought you might like a little snack if you plan to stick around here sipping your latte for a while. I didn’t know what you liked, hence the variety, but they’re all fresh and I can assure you that they’re halfway decent!”

 “Thank you, Eric. That was really nice of you…completely unnecessary, but still nice,” Rae replied as she turned the plate to examine the different pastries, earning a chuckle and smile from Eric.

 “Eric, wait…” Rae found herself calling as Eric slowly turned to walk away from her table.

 What the fuck are you about to do, Rae…?

 Is this a good idea? Probably not. Will it make things any worse than they already are? Probably not…

 “Yes, Rae? Do you need anything else?” Eric asked, slipping back into customer service mode so fluidly it was clear to Rae that he had a lot of practice with this.

 “You mentioned that you had a spare moment…I don’t know if you had something else you needed to do or whatever, but uh…I could use the company, if you want to that is…these pastries are best when shared with a friend, right?”

 “I suppose I could stay and chat for a few minutes…” Eric said with a wide grin as he untied his apron and hung it over the back of the chair opposite Rae before taking a seat.

 “So Rae…if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were keeping tabs on me to ‘accidentally’ cross paths with me while I’m at work, since Saturday evenings aren’t your usual time for coffee…”

 “My ‘usual time’? Who is keeping tabs on who, now?” Eric laughed at how Rae had turned the tables on him, but she quickly continued, “I honestly didn’t even see you when I came in and then you just show up out of nowhere…”

 “Yeah, I actually spend most of my shifts in the back where the kitchen is. All these fresh baked pastries don’t bake themselves, you know!” Eric replied as he tore off a small piece of banana nut bread that Rae offered him on the plate and popped it into his mouth.

 “Huh, I never would have taken you for the baking type…they’re quite good though, so my compliments to the chef,” Rae added as she used a fork to cut off a small piece of the coffee cake and brought it into her mouth.

 “So how are you, Rae? Like I said earlier, you seem a little off…unless you frequently visit small coffee shops at night and sit with your head in your hands like you’re in the middle of a mental breakdown or an existential crisis..? Which if you do, that’s fine…I’ll only judge you a little bit…” Rae chuckled dryly because Eric was not far off from the truth, but his friendly tone seemed to be all the encouragement Rae needed to open up a bit more about what was on her mind.

 “Well I was walking past here and was really cold, so I came in to warm up. But you’re kind of right, I am a bit off, I suppose. I just have a lot on my mind and I’m trying to process everything but I’m not really making any progress.”

 “Would you care to elaborate at all, Rae? I’m a great listener, or so I’ve been told…”

 Rae looked up from her latte that she had been staring at for some time and saw Eric turned around slightly in his chair and having a silent conversation with Jessie from where she stood behind the counter.

 Less than a minute later, Jessie approached their shared table with a smug smile and placed a cup down in front of Eric before walking away.

 “I could feel a story coming on and I thought a cup of tea would pair nicely with whatever story you were about to tell me…” Eric relied when he noticed Rae’s look of confusion as he dropped the teabag into the cup of hot water to steep.

 “Ah, I see…well almost immediately before coming here I spent nearly a month’s rent on textbooks for the semester that starts on Monday at my Uni’s campus bookstore …which I’m not too thrilled about…”

 Eric nodded to show that he was still paying attention as he removed the teabag from his cup and took a cautious sip to avoid burning himself.

 “But mostly I’m just sort of…confused and maybe a bit…uhm, conflicted about something…”

 “About what?”

“Uh, about a boy…that I work with…”

“Ah, I see,” Eric replied as he took another sip of tea and tore off another small piece of banana nut break, “what is there to be confused or conflicted about?”

“Well I’ve been working with this guy for a few months now and I thought he was a total jerk at first, but slowly we became friends and I got to know him a bit…well long story short, I had a few friends insisting that he was flirting with me for a while before I even grew to like him and see him as more than just a coworker, but now I do like him…a lot��and I don’t know what to make of his feelings, since his actions have more or less remained unchanged and I am always getting mixed signals from this guy…”

 Rae had not intended to go into this much detail when telling Eric about everything that was on her mind, but as she sipped her chai latte and he drank his tea and they both nibbled on the pastries he had brought, the words kept coming and she told him almost every minute detail about the situation as Eric sat listening and reacting quietly when appropriate.

 “And so now there’s my childhood best mate, Chloe, the one I mentioned earlier…well, she wants to chat with me so I can fill her in on everything that is going on with my coworker and I don’t know what to say, you know? I obviously can’t say ‘oh he still flirts with me at work, but after I got shitfaced the other night I found him and his ex on Instagram and gave myself a panic attack because it seems like if he really liked me he would have made a move by now, since he’s had like two months to move on from his ex-girlfriend’ but I mean, that’s the truth…”

 Rae had run out of things to say and she sat in silence for a moment and took another sip of her drink that had cooled down a bit too much and was barely even warm at this point, but Rae was too distracted to notice or care.

 Eric sat in silence, nodding slightly as he drank the last bit of tea in his cup, processing everything that Rae had said and trying to gather his thoughts to say something.

 “Hmm…that’s quite a predicament you’re in, Rae…do you know what you’re planning to do or to tell her? Because it seems to me that before you can tell her what’s going on, it may be best for you to figure it out with yourself.”

 “I have no fucking clue what I should do at this point. This is all unfamiliar territory for me, Eric. I don’t really find myself being the object of men’s affections very often—if that’s even what this whole situation really is—so I’m still struggling to navigate my way through what everyone is telling me and how I feel.”

 “I find that very hard to believe, Rae, but okay…do you mind if I give you my input? A little bit of insight into the mind of a guy from the perspective of a guy…”

 “Not at all! Please, I’d greatly appreciate it actually, since I already know what everyone else I would talk to has to say about this whole thing.”

 “Well, I can’t speak for all guys, of course, but it seems to me like if he is stalling to avoid making the first move, it’s because he’s nervous that he’s going to screw it up. Based on everything you told me, I don’t doubt that this bloke is interested in you. But if he has been interested in you for a couple months now and it has mostly just been flirting, he’s probably in a similar position as you are and he’s trying to decide the best way to go about this that won’t backfire on him if you do not reciprocate his feelings…This coworker of yours seems kind of shy, so as a shy guy myself, I can tell you that it’s fucking nerve wracking when you finally decide to be more obvious with your flirting if you aren’t even sure that the person you’re flirting with will react well…” Eric looked away from Rae and began nervously examining his fingernails as he gently bit the inside of his bottom lip which made his lip ring wiggle in place slightly.

 “I suppose you could be right…it’s kind of reassuring to hear that someone like you who has never met my coworker and is not particularly biased is coming to the same conclusions as all my closest mates and coworkers. So clearly I’m not reading too much into things with him, right?”

 “Right! So if that is the case, he might need a little bit more confirmation from you that you are interested in him…I’m not saying that you need to make the first move or let him, uh, ‘whack it in you’ or, uhm, ‘explore your secret garden’ as some of your friends have suggested,” Eric began with an embarrassed chuckled before continuing, “but I think it could do both of you some good if you can both be more forward with your flirting just so you are both confident that the feelings are mutual.”

 “I think you’re right, Eric. Thank you for letting me vent and complain about the woes of my pathetic excuse of a love life to you.”

 “It’s been my pleasure, really. I really hope all this works out for you, Rae! I know it’s not my place to say this, but I just don’t want you to rush into anything you’re not ready for and I don’t want you to regret not doing anything, so I’d say just take your time figuring things out but let the pieces fall as they will and try not to force anything…If it’s meant to be, then it will be.” Eric gave Rae a smile and stood from his chair before putting his apron back on.

 Rae suddenly realized how long they had been talking for when she saw that the majority of the patrons who had filled the café before had left and they were down to a very small crew of employees who were mostly just talking behind the counter, since there were no new to customers to attend to at the moment.

 “I’m so sorry for keeping you so long! I hope you don’t get in trouble for taking such a long break instead of working!” Rae said with concern as Eric stacked the plates and cups they were now finished with for him to take away from the table.

 “In all honesty, I wasn’t even scheduled to work today, so I can’t imagine I’ll be in any trouble.”

 “If you aren’t supposed to be working, why are you here then?” Rae asked in confusion.

 “It’s kind of hard to say ‘no’ when your family owns the café…” Eric replied with a dramatic eye roll as he started walking away.

 Eric was a short distance from Rae’s table when he slowed to a stop and turned around, a look of hesitation and inner conflict obvious on his face before it was replaced with the toothy smile Rae was used to seeing on his face when he was taking customers’ orders.

 “I’m really glad I got to see you today, Rae. I hope everything works out how you want it to with your coworker, because I could tell how heavily the stress of all of that was weighing on you when you first got here. Be sure to come in and see me again sometime soon, okay Rae?” Eric gave Rae a quick wave with one hand before continuing his path towards the kitchen and disappearing behind a door.

 ***

 Sunday morning Rae had woken up in an unexpectedly good mood that she decided had to be attributed to her conversation with Eric the Barista the prior evening. Their discussion had given Rae a lot to consider, but more than anything, it had given her a new sense of clarity that certainly did not go unnoticed by her coworkers during her shift at work.

 “You certainly seem excited today, Rae. You do realize that the semester starts tomorrow, so what reason do you possibly have to be as happy as you are?” Archie asked with a joking scoff as he took a seat at the table Rae was sitting at in the break room.

 “Ugh, don’t remind me about classes starting. As it is, my bank account is still trying to recover from buying all the textbooks I’m going to need,” Rae said with a cringe.

 “If you truly must know, Archie, I am quite happy today I suppose…I just feel so at-ease with, well, everything.”

 Archie furrowed his eyebrows and gestured with his hand for Rae to continue, so she took a deep breath before continuing the conversation that she had known would be brought up at some point today.

 “So do you remember what I told you Friday at work about me drunk crying on Izzie’s kitchen floor on Thursday evening? Well, I basically gave myself a panic attack because I was overthinking the whole situation with…‘Alphonzo’…after I sort of stalked him and his ex-girlfriends’ Instagram pages…” Rae replied, trying to ignore Archie’s noticeable surprise as she casually told him more about her recent drunken antics.

 “So there’s that…and do you remember the guy from the café across the street that I mentioned had paid for my coffee and was flirting with me a bit…?”

 “Yes, I remember that too. I also remember the look of jealousy on Fi—Alphonzo’s face when you were talking about that, so if your goal was to make him jealous: mission accomplished! Seriously, he did not stop glancing over his shoulder at you for the rest of his shift on Friday and then—ugh, I really shouldn’t be telling you this, so you have to swear that you never heard it from me, okay?—and then yesterday he was asking me a bunch of questions about you and the barista you were talking about…”

 “Are you serious, right now? How did the even come up in conversation!? What kind of questions was he asking?” Rae asked slightly embarrassed that she had been a topic of conversation when she was not even at work.

 “Well someone else came in with a cup from the café and Peter and Melissa were chatting about what you had said and were wondering if ‘Rae’s not-so-secret admirer’ had been working or not and so he was asking me if I had ever seen the barista you were talking about, if I had ever gone to the café with you and seen you interact with this barista…If I thought you were interested in this barista more than you were letting on when you told the story…and he was asking me about whether or not I thought you liked how forward the barista was in terms of giving you free coffee and leaving a note on your coffee…stuff like that mostly. He was trying to be casual about it all, but I know him too well.” Archie replied with a self-satisfied smirk.

 “Wow…that’s kind of a great and crazy coincidence because yesterday evening I went to the café and I ended up talking to that barista, his name is Eric by the way, for like two hours…about Finn…”

 “Wait, so let me get this straight, Rae. You spent two hours last night talking and getting relationship advice about the bloke you like from a guy who two days prior gave you free coffee and flirted with you and professed his love for you in the form of a note on the side of your coffee cup…?”

 “Well, uh, sort of? I mean, he didn’t profess his love to me on my cup on Thursday! He just complimented me and told me how much his day is improved when he sees me come into the café…and…holy shit, I fucking friend-zoned this poor lad, didn’t I!?!”

 “It sort of seems like it, Rae. I mean this guy, Eric, clearly likes you enough that he wanted to give you free coffee and make sure that you knew how much he appreciates you coming into the café when he’s working…and then you pour your heart out to him about another guy…”

 “Aw, now I just feel like a terrible person, Arch! Eric was so supportive and he seemed happy for me because I was happy after talking it all through with him, but like, I’m pretty sure I would react the same way if I just got hardcore friend-zoned and wanted to play it cool…” Archie reached out a hand to pat Rae on the back to help soothe her as she continued, “Eric is like…really attractive, too! And he was so nice about everything and he didn’t even make the situation too weird or anything!”

 “That’s a good thing though, right? That Eric was able to put aside whatever feelings he may or may not have for you and give you genuine advice because he wants the best for you…”

 “Yeah, it was so nice getting the opinion of a guy on the whole situation with Finn…”

 “Uhm, excuse me? What am I if not a guy? A potato!”

 “That’s not what I meant, Arch, and you know it. I just meant a guy that wasn’t wrapped up in the whole situation and a close mutual friend of both people involved…”

 “I guess you have a fair point…” Archie said with a chuckle before realizing how much their conversation had veered off-topic, “Oh, so the reason you’re so happy today is…because you talked to your Barista Buddy and…?”

 “Oh, yeah! I talked to him about the whole situation and I feel like I have a good idea of what I need to do and how I can show ‘Alphonzo’ that I’m interested without putting myself out there too much and then at some point one of us will have to take the chance and make the first move, but I’m not as freaked out about all of this as I was up to that point.”

 By this point, Rae and Archie’s break had already ended, but they had simply continued their conversation back at their desks in hushed whispers to avoid being overheard.

 “So what now?”

 “Well, I guess I just sit back, relax, and wait for—“

 “Finn! Hi, how’s it going?” Archie called in greeting before sharing a nervous smile with Rae.

 “Hey, Archie. How are you this morning, Rae? You look really nice…are you dressed up today for something, or someone, special?” Finn asked as he took a seat at the empty desk on Rae’s left side, opposite of Archie.

 “Hiya Finn! And thank you, but do I really seem like the kind of girl that would dress up and alter my appearance for the benefit of another person?” Rae scoffed, feigning that she was offended at his implications but smiled as she continued, “I’m just giving you a hard time, Finn…I dressed up for myself today, mostly. It just feels nice to get dressed up and look pretty from time to time, I guess!”

 Rae looked down at her outfit as she adjusted the sleeves of her cardigan and plucked off imaginary bits of fluff and debris. Rae had paired one of her favorite dresses that had a very short multi-toned blue flowy skirt and a pale denim bustier top with navy blue tights, a long gray cardigan that was nearly longer than the dress itself, and neutral taupe ankle boots with a small, chunky heel. Rae’s hair, which she had straightened earlier that morning, was beginning to re-curl itself because of the humidity of the chilly January air, but it appeared to be done intentionally leaving Rae’s hair in bouncy, gentle purple waves opposed to her usual mess of ringlets and spiraling waves. She completed her look with very simple makeup, focusing mainly on drawing attention to her eyes and naturally long eyelashes and completing the look with subtle berry-toned lipstick.

 Rae seldom looked in the mirror and felt completely happy with the image staring back; however, Rae felt happy and she could see a uniquely happy glow in her appearance that made her feel truly beautiful today and it felt nice to know that others were beginning to take notice of the change as well.

 ***

Monday morning Rae awoke earlier than she would have liked and began reluctantly getting ready before beginning her hour-long walk from her apartment to campus.

 After taking her first Computer Programming course last semester, Rae’s interest in programming and design had been piqued; however, after sitting through an hour long class this morning in which the professor introduced the Programming for Media Arts course Rae was enrolled in this semester, she had a sinking suspicion that she would likely grow to love or hate this course, but it was entirely too early to tell which.

 Rae walked out of the building and had to stop to allow her eyes to adjust to the bright gray light of this overcast January morning after sitting in almost complete darkness during her programming class.

 When the brightness was more bearable, Rae pulled her phone from her pocket and began to check the time when she could vaguely hear someone calling her name.

 “Rae! Rae-Rae!”

 She looked up to see someone on a bicycle riding towards her that was waving with both hands to get her attention from some ways away. It was not until this person on their bike got much closer and Rae could make out the tattoos on their arms that were peeking out from the sleeves of their jacket and the messy brown hair tousled by the wind that she realized who had been trying to get her attention.

 “Good morning, Finn!” She called when he was only a short distance away from her.

 “Hey Rae! I’m running late but I’ll talk to you later…” Finn replied without slowing his speed, calling over his shoulder and trailing off as he rode his bike further out of earshot of Rae.

 What time is it?   10:09 AM…

 This is great…Finn is already nearly 10 minutes late for his shift to work and yet he still makes a point to say “hi” when he sees me.

 Rae did not even try to wipe the smile off her face as she walked to grab a chai latte from a coffee shop on campus before walking to work.

 Since it was Monday, Rae’s scheduled shift did not begin until noon, but as she walked into the office building that she worked on and it was still a quarter to eleven, Rae decided that it was better for her to be early to work and take the extra time to work on assignments for one of her online courses using the Wi-Fi at work rather than risk being late to work if she went back to her apartment or remained on campus.

 As Rae sat in the break room at work, scrolling through social media on her phone after figuring out which of her online classes would require more immediate attention, Rae began regretting her decision not to grab something to eat before walking to work. Between work and the three hour long Business Marketing class Rae had later that afternoon, she quickly realized that she likely would not have a chance to eat until after she was done with her class that evening.

 Rae was debating buying a snack from the vending machine in the break room when she heard the quiet scraping of a chair next to her being pulled out from under the table where she sat.

 “Hey there, Chop!”

 “How’s it going, Raemundo?” Chop replied as he used a fork he had grabbed from the drawer in the break room to stir the Cup of Noodles he had just pulled from the microwave.

 “It’s going,” Rae said, chuckling as a rogue noodle dangled from Chop’s mouth as he took the first bite of his noodle soup, “how are you today? Did you have any classes yet?”

 “I’m good, thanks!” Chops said before stopping to get another mouthful of noodles, “And nope, no classes today, but I’ve been at work since 8am! Do you have classes today?”

 “Yeah, I had class earlier this morning. And I have a two hour shift at work starting at noon and then class again after that…This semester has me constantly running back and forth between classes and work,” Rae explained with an annoyed eye roll.

 “That’s awful, Rae! I’m so sorry!”

 “It is what it is…”

 “It looks pretty cloudy outside today, I wonder if it’s going to rain,” Chop mused when there was a lull in the conversation as he looked out the window to the parking lot for their office.

 “I hope not! I’m walking back to campus after work,” Rae replied with a small frown after she looked outside the window as well and was fairly certain that it would begin raining within the hour.

 “Well, I can give you a ride! You said you’re working a two hour shift? We get off work at the same time!”

 “Thank you, Chop, but no thank you. You’re done for the day after this and I’d hate to put you out and make you go out of your way just to give me a ride to campus. I don’t think it’ll rain, or if it does, I’m sure it won’t be so much that I can’t walk the twenty minutes or so back to campus.”

 As if right on cue, mere moments after Rae decline Chop’s offer, a sudden boom of thunder followed by a downpour of rain began, making both Rae and Chop jump slightly out of surprise before chuckling at the irony of it all.

 “Uh, I’m sure the rain will stop soon…” Rae mumbled, not even fully believing her own words.

 “It’s no trouble, really. Finn and I live less than a mile from campus, so it’s not even going out of my way, honestly! Just let me know, okay? But if it is still raining after work, I will not take ‘no’ for an answer, Rae! I will be driving you to your next class because I simply cannot have my Raemundo walking in the rain!” Chop said as he pointed a finger at Rae, adding emphasis to the point he was trying to make.

 “Fine, but I’ll let you know if anything changes.” Rae replied as Chop threw away the empty Cup of Noodles container and waved goodbye to Rae before exiting the break room to get back to work.

Rae was still looking out the window at the rain pouring down and collecting in puddles that would undoubtedly flood the parking lot by the time the rain began to let up—if it let up—when she felt a pair of arms wrap around her from behind in a surprise hug.

 “Guess who…” Rae heard this person sing-song and Rae instantly smiled when she realized who it was.

 “Hmm…whoever could it be?” Rae replied with a chuckle as she turned her torso slightly to return the hug Rebecca was giving her.

“Are you on break or are you just coming in at noon?” Rebecca asked as she pulled out the chair Chop previous occupied and took a seat beside Rae.

 “I start at noon, but I’m only working for a couple hours”

 “Yay, we get off work at the same time! That’s perfect!” Rebecca exclaimed, nearly bouncing out of her chair with excitement.

 “Uh, what’s perfect?” Rae asked as she quirked an eye brow up in confusion.

 “I was just realizing how hungry I am and I don’t know if you have class immediately after work or not, but if you don’t…Will you do me the honor of being my lunch date today?”

 “I’d love to!” Rae said with a smile.

 “Splendid! I have to get back to work right now, but I’ll be waiting for you out here in the break room after work and we can go from here!”

 Rae waved goodbye to Rebecca and continued scrolling through social media on her phone until it was close enough to noon that she could justify logging into her computer and getting to work.

 Rae switched her cell phone to silent and walked into the main office area. After scanning her badge at the small machine on the wall, Rae began walking towards the closest open desk when she was very nearly knocked to the ground by someone who had hurriedly stood from their chair and began walking without watching where they were going.

 “Oh shit, my bad, girl! Are you alright?” Finn asked as he placed a hand on each of Rae’s shoulders to steady her after he had inadvertently collided with her.

 “Yeah, all good, Finn!” Rae replied with an embarrassed chuckle.

 “Phew, that’s a relief…I saw you today when I was riding my bike through the middle of campus on my way to work!”

 “I know. I saw you too,” Rae began with a small chuckle, “and said I ‘hi’…and then you said ‘hi’ and that you were running late and would talk to me later”

“Yeah, you didn’t seem to recognize me when I was first trying to catch your attention, so I was almost afraid that you weren’t really you or something!”

 “Nope, it was me, I was just distracted and when you were riding you bike I didn’t recognize you until you got a bit closer,” Rae chuckled nervously as Finn dropped his hands—which she just realized had been resting on her shoulders during their entire conversation—and gave her a quick smile before side-stepping to walk past her.

 Rae noticed that the desk beside Chop was empty, so she set her badge down on the desk and pulled out the chair to take a seat.

 “Long time no see, baby girl!” Chop called, giving Rae a wink as she began logging into her computer and Finn returned to his desk on the opposite side of Chop.

 “I know! I haven’t seen you in so long…how are you?” Rae replied catching on to the joke immediately.

 “I’m good thanks…not much has changed in the last, oh, twenty minutes,” Chop replied with a laugh.

 During this short exchange, Finn kept looking from Chop to Rae in confusion as he waited for them to explain what inside joke he was being left out of before finally Chop clarified.

 “Our Raemundo here was sitting in the break room before her shift and so I sat with her during my break and we were chatting a bit,”

 “Ah, I see.” Finn replied with a nod as he returned to work, only slightly averting his attention away from Chop and Rae’s conversation.

 “Which reminds me! While I appreciate the offer, Chop,” Rae began after quickly glancing over at Chop as she continued checking her email, “I made plans for lunch as soon as I get off work and they can give me a ride back to campus when we’re done. So I won’t be needing a ride after work. Thank you for offering though, Chop. That was really considerate of you!”

 “You, uh, you offered to give Rae a ride home from work today?” Finn asked unable to hide that he had been tuned into their conversation.

 “Well not home, because she has a class after her shift, but yeah! It started to rain really hard during my break and she and I get off work at the same so I just figured…”

 “Oh, no, that makes sense. That was nice of you Chop…The offer stands for me too, Girl. If you ever want me to give you a ride somewhere after work, just let me know!” Finn replied after quickly regaining his composure and shooting her a crooked grin.

 “Uhm, a ride on your bicycle?” Rae asked, raising her eye brows and unsuccessfully containing a smile.

 “No, of course not,” Finn mumbled as a blush spread across his cheeks, “I do have a car…I just didn’t want to drive my car and have to find parking if I only worked for a couple hours today…”

 “No need to justify yourself to me, Finn. I was just having a little fun with you,” Rae replied with a smirk which only caused Finn to blush a deeper shade of red and seem more embarrassed as he nervously bit his lower lip, “I appreciate the offer nonetheless and I’ll be sure to keep it in mind, thanks!”

 The clocks on the wall chimed, signaling that it was officially noon, and Finn stood from his desk chair and began walking toward the exit, turning back to give Chop a nod and Rae a wave and small smile before walking out of the building.

@eveerez @tinakegg @hey1tskat1e @bitchesbecrazy89 @kneekeyta @milllott @protectfinnnelson @arathewallflower @jackiewalsh2013 @pink-royaute @i-dream-of-emus @lurkernolonger @bitchy-broken @nutinanutshell @mallyallyandra @borntosik

A/N: Hello, my darlings! Okay, forreal though: what did you all think of how savagely Rae *accidentally* friend-zoned Eric the Barista by venting about all her boy troubles? (This was certainly not my proudest moment, I must admit...) 😅😬😅 Do you still think Eric poses any threat to Finn's chances with Rae after reading this chapter? 🤔 I know some of you were probably worried about that possibility after I introduced him into the story in Chapter 12...

The end is nigh (just kidding...sort of...) and there's only one more chapter to be posted this week, probably late tonight or early tomorrow morning. Big things are in the works and there's a lot of stuff happening both in this story line and in my real life, but yeah...this should be fun. 😅

I look forward to hearing what you all think of this chapter and the next one to come...14 chapters down, and 1 more to go (for now)...let's do this shit! 😁

[bubbleteascenarios]

Quit Playin’ (Daehyun)

You rub your eyes, the bright computer screen was starting to make your eyes sting. One hand still on your controller and both eyes still locked on the screen, you reach into your desk drawer for your eye drops. It was now Saturday night or was it morning? You’d already lost track of time. You always came home on Friday, after classes, and would lose yourself in a weekend of gaming. Daehyun rarely came home on the weekends so you used it to fuel your gaming needs. You could hear your teammates shouting at you for help as your eyes watered from the drops. 

“Hold on!” You shout back into the headset. 

“Hey... You’re a girl?” One teammate asks. 

“That’s not important, you’re getting your ass kicked! Pay attention!” You rub your eyes again to clear them of the artificial tears and resume your raging. The front door starts to rattle and Daehyun makes his way inside. 

“Babe?” No answer. He makes his way to the bedroom, completely exhausted from the week. When he enters he sees your special blackout curtains drawn and the harsh light from the computer harshly lighting your face. “I’m home.” He sees your eyes glance over at him, you flash him a quick smile, then return to your game. 

You scream, “to the left!” You sigh angrily when your team loses, throwing your headset on the desk and leaning back in your seat. Daehyun takes this as an green-light to come hug you. “What are you doing home on a Saturday night?” 

“It’s Saturday afternoon...” 

“No, it’s definitely...” He moves to the curtain and pulls it open in one motion. The bright light floods the room and your have to shut your eyes because it hurt so badly. “Close it!” You whine, covering your face with your hands. “I didn’t expect you to be home,” you pout as Daehyun closes the curtains.  

“So you want me to leave?” 

“No! It’s just that I entered this tournament since I thought you’d be gone. I can’t just bail on my team...”

“It’s fine. You can just finish up and we’ll have the rest of the weekend.” 

“If our team keeps advancing we’ll be at it until Sunday night.” He nods. “Sorry...” 

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll just wait for you to finish.” He kisses you and escapes to the bathroom. You smile apologetically, but return to your game which was generating new brackets. 

“Sorry, guys. My boyfriend just came home.”

“Your boyfriend? Quit kidding around. Gamers don’t have romantic relationships,” one snorts.

“Well, not with your attitude.” You retort. 

“Send a picture! There’s no way you have a boyfriend.” You roll your eyes and quickly send a picture of you and Daehyun on your last anniversary. “Damn, you’re cute. How about you be my girlfriend? He doesn’t seem like the gamer type.” 

“How about you stop being a pig?”

“Wait... Isn’t that Daehyun from B.A.P?” The other boy asks. "You photoshopped this, didn’t you?” 

“Get on your webcams, assholes.” You pull up video chat on your second monitor and the two boys are there staring at you. “Oppa! Come here.” Daehyun exits the bathroom, patting his hair dry with a towel. He tosses the towel on the bed and crouches over to look at the screen.

“Oh, shit! That’s really him!” The second boy gasps, “I’m a huge fan!” He waves and Daehyun waves back awkwardly. 

“Why are you video chatting with strangers?” He turns to face you, “why don’t you ever video chat with me when I’m on tour?” He’s clearly jealous, especially when he realizes you’re in your semi-revealing nightie. He quickly moves in front of the webcam, obstructing the other boys’ view. 

“Hey! Get him to move!” The first boy’s screams are deafening, even Daehyun can hear them despite your headset being securely on your head. 

“I told you. It’s probably your pig personality that you’re still single.” Daehyun’s jaw is clenched tightly when he pulls his shirt off and puts it on you. You complain about it being warm and damp from his shower, but accept. “Ah! Oppa, move! The game is starting.” He picks you up and has you sit in his lap. You don’t complain, already focused back on the screen. At some point, you complain about his shirt and take it off. He responds by draping his arms around your shoulders so he could cover your cleavage from the two boys. 

The two boys are distracted by Daehyun glaring at them and when he starts to place light kisses along the back of your neck. After a while, he chooses to rest his chin on your shoulder, asking you random questions to distract you. Who’s that? What’s that? When are you going to finish? I’m bored. A couple of times he actually bumped your hand, causing you to miss the target and die once. You whined at him, but he thought it was cute how you reacted. Even your team was surprised. You were usually swearing like a sailor by now, but they figured you didn’t do that because Daehyun was with you. That continued for the next 5 hours.

“Tell your boyfriend to get out of the screen! He’s distracting us!”

You laugh, “even I’m not distracted, what’s your excuse?”

“Oh? You’re not distracted?” Daehyun mumbles, taking your headset off. 

“Hey! I need that!” You try to reach for it with one hand, but Daehyun unplugs it. “If you’re going to be annoying then you shouldn’t have come home.” You weren’t really thinking when you said it, but immediately after, you gasp. You throw the controller down on the desk and get up from his lap to face him. “I’m so sorry...” You could hear your teammates yelling for you to get back because they were losing without you. 

“Forget it,” Daehyun huffs. Getting up from the chair and heads to the living room. He flops down onto the sofa and turns the TV on. You chase after him and kneel beside him on the floor. 

“I wasn’t thinking. You know how I get when I play games. Please forgive me. I didn’t mean it--” 

“You’re blocking the TV. Move.” You move enough so that he can see the TV. You take his hand in both of yours. 

“Please forgive me...” 

“If your games are more important right now then go play them.”

“They’re not! You’re the most important to me.”

“Just forget it.” You bite your lip, trying to stop yourself from crying. “I barely get a chance to come home and, when I do, you’d actually prioritize a game with some random guys on the internet. It’s fine. Just forget it. You can have your games without me,” He shakes your hands off his and goes to grab a hoodie from the bedroom. You’re still sitting on the floor, blankly staring at the couch. You don’t even realize that your welled up tears were rolling down your face. He walks past you towards the front door. 

“I said I was sorry... You know I didn’t mean it when I said you shouldn’t come home.” The emotions finally break free and you’re sobbing. “You don’t know how many nights I cried myself to sleep because you weren’t here! I’m happy you’re home! I just-- It’s my hobby! It’s the only thing I have to do when you’re not here. I already said I was sorry, but you’d actually go as far as to say you want to break up?” You’re furiously wiping the tears from your face when you feel Daehyun’s arms around you. 

“Oh my God, I’m sorry. I didn’t know I’d make you cry... I was just messing with you! I thought you’d get angry, not cry! Shh... Shh,” he gently pats your head with one hand and rubs your back with the other. You bury your face in chest and continue to cry. 

“That’s not funny! I really thought you were going to leave. Don’t do that ever again!” He laughs, earning a punch in the gut from you. 

“I’m sorry. I just wanted you to pay attention to me.” Your crying subsides and you look up at him with puffy eyes. “Aw~ Don’t cry anymore.” 

“Are you happy now?” 

“Kind of... I got you away from those weirdos online. I didn’t like the way they were looking at you. How dense are you to hop on webcam with strangers when you’re dressed like this?” He holds your hands and admires you in your silk and lace ensemble. “This is for my eyes only, you understand?” You nod fervently and throw yourself back into his arms. He picks you up and carries you back to the bedroom. Your team lost the game, obviously. They were sitting there with their arms crossed. Daehyun sets you on the bed and goes to the computer. He plugs your headset back in and your teammates curse at him. 

“Fuck you. This is why we don’t game with girls. They’re so emotional.” 

“Well, she doesn’t need you either,” Daehyun smiles as he flips them off and shuts your computer down. 

“Yah~ What if they screenshotted that and it ends up all over the internet tomorrow?” He lies down beside you in bed and holds you close. 

“I’ll deal with it when it happens,” he exhales. “Let’s just go to sleep now. I’m tired and you’re going to have dark circle to hell and back.” 

“I’m really sorry. I really didn’t mean it. I like having you at home. I get lonely sleeping by myself.”

“You won’t have to feel that way for a while.” 

“Huh? Are you really--” 

“Do you think you can quit playing games for the next month?” 

Without hesitation, “yes!” You snuggle closely to Daehyun and fall asleep quickly in his arms. You’d give up games for him any day.

✰——————————

Wasn’t really sure how to make it angsty, but hopefully it’s what you wanted! ^0^ Random scenarios keep getting longer and longer, wasn’t sure if I needed the keep reading break of not... orz

[rollertoasteroflife]

These Things Are Fun Lets Give It a Go

Tagged by @katyaton heyyyyyyy!

RULES: answer all questions, add one question of your own and tag as many people as there are questions. (…yeah I don’t know that many people...)

tagging: @deaded123 @showmethestarlight and if anyone that follows me wants to please do but you two are the only ones that actually reply to these things and I can’t be arsed to go through all of my followers when no one does them anyway :D

1.      coke or pepsi: coke definitely

2.      disney or dreamworks:  oh god ummm i love disney cos that was my childhood but dreamworks have done some truly amazing films and they gave me how to train your dragon which i love far more than is probably normal...

3.      coffee or tea: *whispers* both definitely both...I drink so much coffee and tea and currently green tea I’m probably 70% hot beverage at this point

4.      books or movies: ah fuck. um I have to say finding a favourite book feels so much better than a favourite film but like I literally work in the film industry so I honestly love them too but yeah imma have to say books (that was really difficult D:)

5.      windows or mac: windows cos it’s what i know

6.      dc or marvel: um I’ve seen more marvel so I’ll say marvel but I’m not particular opinionated on the matter

7.      xbox or playstation: I am abysmal at playing games so again not really my question. however i have finally worked out how to use my housemates xbox as a dvd player so woo

8.      dragon age or mass effect: I don’t play them

9.      night owl or early riser: Permanently tired pigeon here but more of a night owl.

10.  cards or chess: Oh god um  actually can’t choose because i grew up playing card games and i really love them but i have a massive sentimental personal thing about chess so yeah i can’t choose here

11.  chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate what am I? dumb?!

12.  vans or converse: Converse 

13.  lavellan, trevelyan, cadash, or adaar: I do not understand

14.  fluff or angst: um in like fic reading or my life?? because my favourite fan fics are often angsty ones but I get wayyyyyyyyyy too emotional about them and yet still tend to read them over fluffy ones. Yet in actual life my life has enough problems please cover me fluffy things i’m tired

15.  beach or forest: beach because there’s sea but i fucking love forests so much!!

16.  dogs or cats: Cats!! but puppers are great too!!!

17.  clear skies or rain: Fucking rain I love rain!!

18.  cooking or eating out: I really like cooking it’s what I resort to when I’m having issues with life not working out.

19. Spicy food or mild food: I don’t like massively spicy food but I will fight you over bland food so like somewhere between the two??

20.  halloween/samhain or solstice/yule/christmas: I only really started doing halloween like a couple of years ago but i do enjoy it (woo for fancy dress) but i do really love christmas!

21.  would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: cold definitely i hate the heat. It was 15 degrees c today (59 fahrenheit thanks google) and i was dying and complaining most of the day

22.  if you could have a superpower, what would it be: Shapeshifting!!!! 

23.  animation or live action: Again with the whole job thing, live action but i love animated films too!!

24.  paragon or renegade: eh?

25.  baths or showers: i shower more often but my house doesn’t have a bath and i really miss it. also currently with my leg injuries i would love a bath because they ache so bad D:  

26.  team cap or team ironman:  umm i don’t know?? I’m not gonna choose sorry

27.  fantasy or sci-fi: Fantasy but scifi is awesome!

28. do you have three or four  favourite quotes? if so what are they: Presume not that I am the thing I was - Shakespeare Henry V

The planets and heavens will move for you. - this is a quote from a poem @deaded123/ @breathingtheworldinwords wrote for me which is my favourite poem

I am constantly coming across quotes i want ot remember but i never write them down so yeah...

29.  youtube or netflix: netflix

30.  harry potter or percy jackson: Harry potter but am currently working my way through the percy jacksons series which i do enjoy and rick riordan is an awesome human!

31.  when you feel accomplished: when i remember how far i’ve come from what i was and how hard i’ve fought to be where i am now. Also I once forgot what happened in a battle on an history exam so proceeded to talk about the battle of helms deep and cut the orcs and elves. I got 100% on that paper. ;)

32.  star wars or star trek: star wars......it was my childhood and i love it so much

33.  paperback books or hardback books: i do love me a good hardback but my paperbacks have kept me company for a long time

34. horror or rom-com: ummm i’m not great at horror but it depends so i’d probs watch the rom com and just be cynically sarcastic throughout...(the fact that i enjoy rom coms when i’m not great and actual romance annoys myself)

35.  to live in a world without literature or music: that is just mean :P but i’d have to chose literature as my life is based around stories

36.  pastel colours or dark colours: dark definitely!! other people look aweosme in pastels but i don’t like wearing them and honeslty just feel kind of suspicious of them as a colour group (i have no idea why i have such storng opinions on pastels or why i am suspicious...)

37.  tv shows or movies: Tv shows as you go through so much more. Also it suits my attention span better

38.  city or countryside: can i have like a town?? i love the countryside but i also need to be around other people or i get very morbid

39.  if any other zodiac sign could describe you, what would it be: i don’t understand??i’m a leo and honeslty haven’t looked at the others enough to know the traits!

40.  if you could only listen to one album for the rest of your life what would it be: i would currently choose one of sia’s albums as just yes

41.  cinema or theatre: cinema because i love films but i do enjoy theatre

42.  if you could be any fictional character’s best friend, who’d you be: hmmmmmmmm i honeslty don’t know as my favs are people like me but being around someone like me as a best friend is kind of an odd thought...pass?

43.  smiling or smirking: smiling to me means just being free and comfortable to be happy and smirking in my mind is the silly little in jokes that tyou have with friends in the middle of a conversation or when you’ve thought of something inappropriately funny both of which i do a lot.

44.  are you an ‘all or nothing’ type or are you more consistent: all or nothing probably

45.  playlists or your whole library on shuffle: shuffle because i’m too lazy to make playlists

46.  travelling or staying at home: Travelling,but i like to have a base somewhere. but yeah i get bored of places easily and am not attached to anywhere as a ‘home’ as a concept i’ve never really got that feeling about anywhere? um it’s hard to explain so i’m just gonna stop cos i don’t know what my point is

47.  books or fanfiction: both are literature and they’re both stories and i fucking love stories in all forms! right now i’m reading more fanfiction because when i need to work lets get lost in emotions about fictional characters right?! but seriously i have a bunch of favourite fanfics which i keep rereading and most are novel length so like not much of  a difference!

48.  If you could live in a fantasy world, what world would it be: the chronicles of ixia world probably but like god there are so many that i’d want to be in!!

49. your favorite cartoon: um i don’t really watch that many cartoons... cacn i claim the Dragons tv series that accompanies httyd? it’s animated......

50.  name the weirdest five songs on your itunes, current or past: um ok so i have a bit of  a weird thing about my music in that i don’t like talking about it too much...i’m getting better but yeah i don’t want to answer this :)

51. mountains or plains: Mountains!!!!!!! they give me liiiiiiiiiife

52. favorite anime (or tv show if you don’t watch anime): Yuri on ice is the first anime i’ve watched and honeslty have fallen in love with it and it has ruined my world right now (it’s what my anxieties are currently directed out instead of at my work which i’m cool with) and the only other one i’ve seen is ouran high school host club which i actually watched half of yesterday whilst working as a friend loves it, it’s amusing :)

53. which social media platform are you most like yourself on: err i don’t really do social media much. i have facebook to talk to uni people, a couple of group chats with home people and it’s the only contact i have with my dad’s side of the fam as most don’t live in england but i don’t actually post anything except about work i’ve got donea dn funny photos of my friends. obvs i have tumblr which i overshare about myself way too much but this is probs a very accurate summary of my shit sense of humour, tv shows, and everything else in my head! though i do sometimes get concerned about my oversharing on here cos y’know internet safetyand all D: oh i have snapchat too but i mainly use it to talk to 2 friends one is in germany so i can’t ring her like i used to and the other we pretty much just send each other selfies with a lot of heart emojis! i’ve been debating getting instagram but haven’t decided yet...

54. What are some of your passions:anyone that knows me or reads my frequent oversharing will know i work in costume stuff so yeah i can literally talk about costuming and historic fashions for days and not get bored so yeha don’t ask about that unless you ready to learn!! ;) um i’m also an archery instructor, really love drawing, and just yeah the various tv, film and book obsessions that i go through (currently it’s yoi but i do try and keep my obsession from fully taking ove rthis blog-80% of it is still my shit sense of humour

55. Favourite food: I will fight everyone to get a proper roast dinner with yorkshire puddings and also chocolate.....and pomegranates.....and sugar snap peas......

This was fun!!!