#ANYWAY yet again I have NO idea what proper anatomy is and I did not use a reference for Merlin and only glanced at one for Gwen so

[merlins-strawberriesandroses]

POV you’ve informed the Queen and the Court’s Sorcerer of something and they very clearly know something that they’re not letting on

[of-birds-and-men]

Kass gave Link a warm smile, the early morning sun dipping him in honey and making his smile glow even more. “Well, this is quite out of the blue. Not even a ‘hello?’ Much less a ‘please?’”

Link’s lips snapped into a flustered frown. “I’m sorry,” he frantically signed. “Please, could you teach me?”

After throwing his head back to bellow a laugh, Kass chuckled, “I am only messing with you, my friend. Do not worry.” He patted the spot next to him on the landing where he sat, signaling Link to sit by him. “I’m curious about what song you want to play. Which is it?”

Accepting the invitation to sit next to Kass, Link kept his head down as he shuffled over. His eyes flicked around and his cheeks started to redden the slightest bit. Why the answer embarrassed him so much, he wasn’t so sure, but it was hard to get his reply out.

“Ah,” Kass said with his smile still prominent on his beak as he set his accordion down next to him. “Do you mean to learn the other Champions’ songs as well?”

Link breathed in through his teeth and shrugged. “Maybe. But I want to learn Revali’s right now if I can...”

Kass looked down at him with raised eyebrows, as if gently urging him to elaborate. 

With that, Link rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged again. “Well...I don’t know. I had some memories come to me, but they’re foggy and I can barely understand them. But, something is telling me today is Revali’s…” His hand dropped and his brow furrowed in thought. He knew the sign for the Hylian term but didn’t know it for the Rito if there even was one for it. Opting to fingerspell, Link spelled it out with his fingers as Kass read it closely.

When he was finished, Kass’s beak hung open a little in interest. “Oh, so today is Champion Revali’s Hatchday? I had no idea.”

“Yeah, I…”

“...I think so.”

“You mean to play his song in his memory today?”

Link’s cheeks burned brighter. “Is that stupid?”

“Oh, no. Not in the slightest,” Kass assured, waving his hand. “In fact, I think it’s a lovely idea.”

“...Thanks. I don’t know what else I would do anyway. If there was something, I don’t remember it,” Link said, his hands moving slowly. His mind drifted; not that there was anywhere for it to go after his century-long sleep practically wiped it clean. 

He brought himself back to where he was with a sigh. “I don’t know. I would do something or leave him a gift, but I remember next to nothing about him. I don’t remember what he liked or even what he hated. Nothing...”

It was true. There were only a couple of clear memories of Revali that Link remembered now. Only a few moments where Link could see his face and hear his voice clearly. And then there were even more blurry, foggy images of him that were slowly trickling in and left Link with more questions than answers. Leaving him feeling like there was so much more that he was missing. Almost like he was missing an important part of himself; of what his life had been before Calamity Ganon struck.

Really, it was the same thing with everyone; with Zelda, Mipha, Urbosa, and Daruk. Brief memories, some clear and some so hazy they were beyond recognition.

But with Revali, it was somehow different. It hurt more. It was severely more painful. It made both his heart and head ache. And he had no idea why it was the case for Revali out of all of them. Why the one who seemed to like him the least, or even hated him, made Link feel this longing...No, this need...to remember and know him like he used to. However it had been.

Still, even though his mind was riddled by all sorts of questions he couldn’t answer after forgetting everything but his own name…

Something within him couldn’t quite let itself completely forget.

“But I know that I have to do something for him and this is all I can think of,” Link finished, taking his time with every hand motion as he stared down at the lake below them; the surface of the water was almost black with the light of the morning sun not having reached it yet.

Noticing the gloom that was beginning to dawn on Link again, Kass leaned over and spoke up in a chipper voice. “It is more than a generous gift. Do not sell yourself short. I’m sure that if he is still there to listen, he will be grateful.” 

Link forced a small smile to give to Kass. “Thank you. I hope you’re right.”

Kass let the corners of his beak curl all the way up to try and settle whatever troubles he thought Link had. “I must say though, I did not take you for the musical type,” he began. “What does a man like you play?”

Letting out a short hum, Link fumbled around in the small bag on his belt to show the instrument in question. Once he fished it out, he held it out for Kass to see.

It was an ocarina he had come across in his travels. His curiosity had driven him to buy it with the extra rupees he had on hand when he saw it amongst Beedle’s wares. Though, it wasn’t until he actually held it and felt the cool ceramic touch on his skin and the shape in his hands, did he realize it was not so much curiosity as it was familiarity. Or something close to it.

And again, it was proven to Link that while his head was clear of what made him himself in the past, there were many things that his body seemed to remember. Muscle memory helped him ride horses like a pro straight away, and instinct along with that allowed him to fight the way he had before without needing to relearn much of anything. It was the same sort of thing for the ocarina; as soon as he brought the mouthpiece to his lips, his fingers knew exactly where to go to play notes he didn’t remember and songs he couldn’t recall. It all came to him naturally as if playing it was once something that was ingrained in him. And he found himself occasionally fiddling with it until now. Too busy to really sit down and learn anything new, but playing what his lips and fingers remembered when he had a moment to himself.

If Link couldn’t leave Revali a proper gift on his Hatchday, then at least he could play his song, one of the last things the world had left to remember him by. Whether it was for Revali himself, if he was still there, or if it was in his memory on his day.

Or, even if it was just for Link; a way to remember Revali with what little he had left.

Hopefully, it would be enough. But it definitely didn’t feel like it, even if it was all he could really do.

“An ocarina certainly does suit you,” Kass said, looking at the instrument in Link’s hands before peering at him and pointing at it. “Ah, may I?”

Link nodded, allowing Kass to take the ocarina in his hands and examine it himself.

“Can you play it, too?” Link asked.

Tittering, Kass replied, “Well, Rito aren’t exactly equipped to play wind instruments, considering our anatomy.” He tapped his beak. “Though, I think once I found a way around it to make it work with this blasted thing on my face. Would you mind if I tried?”

Link’s lips tightly creased together to keep him from smirking as he shook his head and motioned toward the ocarina. He watched as Kass brought it to his beak, which clacked against the ceramic as he tried to find the best position.

Kass’ feathers ruffled; clearly, he was flustered, but he tried his best to get past it by laughing it off. “Well, this is certainly humbling. This proves that no matter how esteemed of a bard I may be, I simply cannot master everything...What with my pesky beak and less than graceful fingers.” He rubbed the mouthpiece of the ocarina on his scarf before handing it back to Link.

With how much spit he saw flying from Kass when he was trying the ocarina, Link decided to rub it again on his clothes for good measure. 

Kass let out another embarrassed chuckle and twisted around to grab his accordion. “I might not be able to give you direction, but I can teach you the notes.”

Link nodded. “That works,” he said, his last words before readying his hands to focus on his ocarina rather than on speaking.

Smiling while he slid his hands through his instrument’s straps, Kass said, “Well, let’s begin then.”

~

Link opened his mouth to say something, finding himself gaping at Vah Medoh, but clamped it shut again. He attached the ocarina to his belt for a moment to speak with his hands.

Whether he was really alone or if there was still someone there to see him, he was not sure at all. After the defeat of Ganon, he was never sure what happened to Revali or the others.

Even so...he had the feeling he wasn’t quite alone.

But maybe that was just him being hopeful. Hopeful that he wasn’t just making a fool of himself. Grasping at straws for nothing.

“Hi.” Instantly, he cringed at himself and hissed through his teeth. Now he really felt stupid. Nonetheless, he made himself go on. “I’m not sure if you’re even here right now or if I’m talking to myself. But, either way-“ Link took a second to swallow and fix his eyes back down to the ground beneath him. “I wish I could say I remember you. There are only little things I remember, but something is telling me there’s so much more to you...to us...that I’m still missing.”

Link licked his lips. He hoped that he was, in fact, alone, so Revali wouldn’t be seeing him rambling on to himself.

“But I know that we were close somehow. I feel that, once, you were the most important thing to me, but that’s all I know. I’m sorry.” He bit his lip that was still wet from when he licked them. “That’s why when I remembered it was your birthday-“ Link froze, then corrected, “Sorry, hatchday...I knew I had to do something for you, because, in a way, you still matter to me now as much as you did before. But you’re still a mystery to me; I know nothing about you further than you being a Champion and being the pride of your people.” He laughed a little to himself. “And that you didn’t like me at all. At first, at least. I’m not sure.”

Finally, he racked up the courage to look back up at Vah Medoh. “I do know your song though, which I’m sure you’d like to know is played by bards to keep your memory alive. I’m not one of those at all, but I can just barely remember how to play this thing and Kass taught me how to play your song. One of the things of yours that’s still here- Even if these are all the memories I can ever have of you, at least I can have this. And your bow, too.”

Nervously, he started to chuckle to himself. “I don’t know what I’m saying. Maybe I never should’ve said anything. Anyway, the point is...I know it’s a crummy present and I don’t know if you’re even still here to listen, but I learned how to play your song for you.”

Done with his monologue, Link anxiously took the ocarina off of his belt. For a moment, he stared at it and focused on the cool touch of it in his hand before slowly bringing it up to his mouth. He took in a deep breath while his fingers went to their places and he played what he learned for Revali.

Dormant, Vah Medoh said nothing in reply, leaving Revali alone to revel in both Link’s appearance and song. That was fine. He honestly hadn’t expected her to reply anyway.

Even when he couldn’t even remember him, Link was still annoyingly sentimental. It brought bittersweet comfort that, even with everything that had happened, it was still the same Link before him. His Link.

He had the same golden hair he used to run his fingers through. The same lustrous, sapphire eyes he used to stare into. The same quiet laugh that warmed Revali’s heart. The same strength that Revali both envied and once fell in love with. The same kindness. The same courage. The same everything. Every little thing Revali loved and even hated about him was still there, down below, playing a song for someone he didn’t even know anymore.

Still, it hurt knowing Link didn’t know him. Seeing no recollection on his face when Link first came to Vah Medoh...Seeing Link looking at him as if he was a stranger…

Well, it nearly broke his heart. To be eventually forgotten by his people was worse enough, but then to have the one he loved come back to him only to forget him, too…

Revali sniffed, resting his hand under his chin to watch Link far down below. 

Link was right. This was a crummy present. His finger clumsily fumbled around and he kept blowing into the ocarina’s mouthpiece too hard or too soft. Even from here, he could see his spit flying. Funny how, even over a hundred years later, he never did get better with that thing.

He really was still his Link. Just how he remembered him. Just how he loved him. How he would, unfortunately, always love him. Even if it meant being unrequited for the rest of time.

~~~

GASPS OUT OF BREATH,,,,,, WOW OKAY,, umm LOL here is le @revalinkexchange gift for @mars-janka ??? I. hm. certainly took some liberties and for some reason with my srs lack of expertise ..I was like “HEY I KNOW HOW TO MAKE THIS INFINITELY HARDER ON MYSELF!!! WRITE AND ALSO DRAW A BILLION PICTURES WHICH IS SOMETHING I BARELY KNOW HOW 2 DO.” 

//sobs// i was so drained of my life juices by the end that the quality DROPPED and im genuinely so sorry pls forgive me wwwwwwwwwwww- i even redrew the last link panels to try and make it better if u can believe it LOL i also was considering making a prose only version of this to make up for it but i honestly don’t know how to translate some bits to that...SO- ah

anyway...yaaaaaaaahhh happy valentine’s day!! hope u still like it despite my clear depletion of life juices dskjghkjag

also teehee ty @udog​ for helping me w vah medoh u smell

[traumendesmadchen]

Chronotopia September Update: The missing third

I’m afraid our current progress on Chronotopia: Second Skin are not exactly exciting to share this month.

Thanks to the new build I generated in August, I was able to give it to a small group of testers (mainly Patrons) and I’m only now receiving their extensive feedback. Unsurprisingly, there are many typos and bugs for me to fix so I’m diligently browsing through them, rectifying each issue one at a time. The only thing of note is that I had way underestimated the average length of a playthrough when I wrote the build’s specifications: it’s already about 30h…which was my estimation for the whole game. I’ll mention the proper playtime from now on!

Other than that, I’m still in the process of porting Chronotopia to the latest version of Ren'Py. As I've said in the previous Kickstarter update: this is going to take a while.

Given how boring development is turning out to be, I thought now would actually be the perfect opportunity to bring up Wounded by Words again.

I don’t know if you remember but, years ago, I stated my wish to publish the short games Träumendes Mädchen had made as a hobbyist team on Steam before Chronotopia’s release. People seemed pretty receptive of the idea and we proceeded. Since then, both Ambre and Garden of Oblivion have been available there for free…but the third visual novel was still missing. My original goal was to release one former hobbyist project per year yet Chronotopia’s development took so long that, after a while, I just wanted to give it priority and focus all my attention on it. As a result, I had to put Wounded by Words aside.

BEFORE / AFTER

But now that Chronotopia: Second Skin has hit an important milestone and things are going to be calm development-wise for a little while anyway, I might as well try to release Wounded by Words on Steam before the end of the year. At least, you’ll have something to help ease the wait!

Fittingly, the Steam Edition of Wounded by Words might be the most interesting one to talk about. We did a complete overhaul of the assets for Ambre’s whereas, for Garden of Oblivion’s, we mostly made adjustments here and there. This time around, there will be a complete presentation overhaul again…but with no new assets involved. Basically, we will be making the most of what we already have to offer a new experience.

It actually makes a lot of sense considering the game jam origins of the project. Back then, I had purposefully restricted myself so that coding would be as quick as possible so there’s a fair amount of hidden potential I could tap into. Take the sprites, for example. With a few minor anatomy adjustments and the addition of some texture, the heroine already looks much better than she previously did. I only need to re-export the layers and I have a bigger resolution with more expression combinations already. Honestly, I think a remake of this specific game will be interesting to see.

And, who knows, maybe new players can enjoy the story in the future~

[solangelover]

AUctober: Day 2 - Pirates

Mermaid/Pirate AU

For @solangeloweek AUctober and to continue my AU!

Ch 1 | Ch 2 | --

Read on AO3 or FF.Net

A/N: You all loved this fic so much (and tbh I read it back and impressed myself lol), so I’ve been wanting to continue for a while! I had like half of this in MerMay, so I finally finished lol. I have a rough chaptered plan buuuut we’ll see!

Will could practically feel the nervous energy of his fellow shipmates right outside the infirmary door. They all tried looking casual, but he saw many people try to peek in through the tiny door window to get a glimpse of what was going on inside.

After all, no one ever thought they’d meet a mermaid.

Well, merman was the proper term (merboy?), but still. Merpeople existed. They’d seen a lot of crazy things out at sea, but they never actively sought out mythical creatures—those things usually came to them anyway. So, no one was surprised, per say, but everyone was definitely curious.

“Grover, Will,” Captain Percy began as he entered the room. “Talk to me.”

Will was finishing his preliminary check of the merboy—Nico, Will reminded himself—though his limited knowledge of merpeople anatomy and physiology was not enough to fully assess Nico’s condition. Grover had come to help at the captain’s request. He had a way with all kinds of creatures, animal or mythical, though usually the non-humanoid kind. He had not done much so far besides smile, but Nico seemed to be more at ease with significantly less people crowding around him.

“Captain,” Will began, still looking at his clipboard as he finished writing notes down. “I’ve just completed assessing Nico’s condition. I don’t know much about his kind, but Nico agreed to receiving more assistance and that he could help fill in knowledge gaps.”

“Oh!” Percy was pleasantly surprised at the merboy’s cooperation. He looked past Will toward the boy on the cot, no longer cooped up in a cage. He smiled at him, earning him a scowl in return.

Nothing fazed the fearless captain, however, as he addressed the merboy. “That’s great news! I hope our doctor here can heal most of your wounds. He’s pretty good at it.” Percy smirked as he cast his eyes toward his best friend. “I also hope Grover did something helpful. He’s probably the nicest person aboard this ship.”

Grover sputtered at the compliment, spitting out, “I didn’t do anything! I mean—I just—I’m just, here to help.” He rubbed his neck, slightly embarrassed as he smiled bashfully at Nico.

Nico nodded at the human. He did seem kind, in a different way from the golden-haired boy that was helping him. The first boy had darker-colored eyes, though not as dark as Nico’s own. But the second boy, the “doctor,” apparently, had bright eyes—the color of the ocean as light filtered in from above. They seemed to sparkle in the same way, too. That actually comforted Nico the most. Before, he would have lashed out and quickly made his escape back into the sea, just as he’d imagined doing on the other ship. But here, the boy with ocean-blue eyes made him feel… not safe, not yet, but safer than he’s felt in a while.

And, now that Nico was looking at the captain of this new ship, he noticed that his eyes were similar. If the doctor, Will, had eyes blue like the deeper parts of the ocean, the captain’s eyes were the color of shallower areas, with green hues mixed in with the blue. Again, it made him feel safe in a way that the cruel, pale blue eyes of his captor had not.

Still, Nico didn’t plan on staying for long. He believed these humans had good intentions, at least as far as healing him went. But beyond that… Nico wouldn’t stick around to find out what they planned to do with him.

Will was going on to say some things about Nico’s condition that Nico himself didn’t fully understand. While he had always been curious about the human language and hung around ships to understand some things, his vocabulary was limited.

“… Anyway, I think I should keep him here for a few days to be sure he heals up okay.” Nico’s head whipped up to stare at the back of Will’s head. A few days was… more than he had anticipated.

Percy nodded, glancing up when he saw Nico move. The bandages on Will’s arm were noticeable, especially considering that Will himself didn’t get hurt very often. Percy was wary of leaving him alone with the merboy. Though the scumbag they rescued him from was vile and cowardly, he might have had the creature locked up for a reason. But after his initial strike, Nico hadn’t moved to hurt anyone outside of scowling and glaring viciously. Plus, he trusted Will’s judgement.

Percy took a step toward the cot, not venturing too close but showing that he wasn’t afraid of the kid. “Nico, right?” The merboy nodded once. “Nico, I’m truly sorry that you were captured and hurt on that other ship, but on my ship, we’re all friendly. I’m sure you don’t trust us yet, and that’s totally fine and understandable. But please know that we will do whatever we can to help you out. After Will gives the ‘okay’ on your health, we’ll take you where you need to go. Got me?” Percy had no idea if Nico was fluent in their language or not, but he hoped his message got across properly.

Nico sat there for a moment, both surprised and suspicious at the man’s words. He stared into those sea-green eyes, coming to the conclusion that, at least for now, his words were genuine. Nico nodded once more, then cleared his throat. “Thank you,” he sounded out carefully, hoping that was the proper usage.

Percy smiled immediately, big and bright. “Okay!” He turned and clapped Grover and Will on the shoulder. “Will, I’m trusting you to fix up our friend, alright?”

“Aye, captain.”

“Grover, I could use your help relaying our situation to the rest of the crew. Tell Kayla and Austin to come in and give Will a hand as needed.”

“Aye Aye, captain.”

“And Nico,” Percy glanced back over his shoulder before heading out, locking eyes with the merboy once more. “Please be nice to the good doctor. He’s the best we’ve got.” And with that, the two friends stepped out and shut the door behind them.

Will swallowed nervously, glancing at Nico, who was still staring at the closed door. Though Grover had not done much, his presence did ease Will’s nerves and allowed him to focus on assessing Nico’s condition. Now that they were alone, however, Will really had time to process the fact that he was here, with a mermaid, acting as his healer. He just shook his head. What a life I have, is all he could think.

He cleared his throat, effectively gaining Nico’s attention as he whipped back towards him, dark eyes boring into Will’s own. “Um, so, your condition is… not great,” he began oh so eloquently. Nico nodded seriously anyway. “You appear to be malnourished, physically injured though not critically, and sleep-deprived. Um,” he glanced nervously at the merboy’s tail. “I also think you’re probably dehydrated if merpeople need more water than humans to survive. The overall condition of your tail doesn’t seem good, though obviously I don’t exactly have a frame of reference for that.”

Will waited as Nico processed his words. His understanding of English was pretty amazing since it obviously was not his native language, but he probably didn’t get to practice it much.

Nico spoke up, voice a bit rough due to disuse and dehydration. “I understand,” he said. “You are correct. My tail should be… lighter? Less… dark.” His face twisted in confusion, and maybe a bit of frustration, at his limited vocabulary.

The doctor hummed as he tried to understand what Nico meant. “Do you mean shiny? Like,” he tapped his chin in thought. “Kind of how the ocean looks when sunlight hits it?”

“Yes!” Nico exclaimed. He wasn’t quite smiling yet, but his eyes lit up at learning a new word. “Shiny,” he said experimentally, tasting the word on his tongue. Will did his best to tamp down his own grin at how pleased Nico looked in this moment.

“Okay,” Will said, making a note on his clipboard. “So, with all of that, I think it’s best if you stay with us for at least three days. There’s a lot of healing that needs to be done for me to feel comfortable sending you home. Octavian really did a number on you.” He frowned down at his notes, upset at how awfully his cousin treated this poor merboy. It was almost amazing that he could become even more disgraceful in Will’s eyes than he already was.

Nico took note of the way Will looked angry when discussing his treatment on the other ship. He did not think the anger was directed at him since Will had been nothing but helpful the entire time he had been here. But he couldn’t quite grasp why Will seemed so upset on Nico’s behalf. They didn’t even know each other—they weren’t even of the same species! Yet, somehow, the way that both the captain and doctor of this ship seemed to care for Nico’s wellbeing brought him a bit of comfort. Not that he trusted them—yet—but he knew genuine actions when he saw them.

Even with all of that, though…

“Three days?” Will’s head snapped up at Nico’s voice, like he had been lost in thought previously. “Is that needed? I can heal on my own.”

The blonde took in the stubborn pout that graced his patient’s face. On the other crew members, Will would have been annoyed. But with Nico… well, he couldn’t help but think it was kind of cute. “Three days is the minimum.” Cute or no, Will always drew the line at someone’s health. “Really, I’d rather keep you for longer, just in terms of your wellbeing. However,” his eyes softened, “I also want to be able to get you home as soon as possible. I’m not sure how long you’ve been away, but I’m sure you must at least miss being in the water.”

Nico glanced away from the kind eyes of the healer. He had not been home in some time, not just due to his capture. But that wasn’t for this human to know.

The merboy didn’t know what to say, but luckily, Will continued on. “So, if it’s okay with you, I would like to keep watch over you for three days to monitor your health so that you can make a full recovery. Is this acceptable?” He desperately hoped that Nico could trust him enough for that to happen. Honestly, the fact that Nico hadn’t put up much of a fight aside from the very beginning shocked Will completely. Perhaps Nico had had good experiences with humans prior to Octavian. That would explain his knowledge of the English language.

Will was also bursting with questions about Nico’s species, which he hoped to get answered over the course of the three days. Because how could he not?

After what felt like an hour of silence, Nico finally seemed to find what he was looking for in Will’s eyes. He nodded, more to himself than the doctor, and said, “Okay, I agree. One condition.” Nico pointed to the door without taking his eyes off Will. “Keep this door locked.”

“What?” Will cocked his head to the side in confusion. That’s probably the opposite of what he would have expected the merboy to want.

“Locked,” he said again, like Will didn’t understand. “I do not think you will harm me. But I do not know the other humans.”

Ah, that makes sense and is actually pretty smart thinking, Will thought as he nodded in understanding. “Understood. I’ll clear that with Percy and make sure it is always locked. I can leave a key in here as well, if that makes you more comfortable. I don’t want you to feel,” caged, he nearly said, “held against your will.”

This earned Will a tiny smile and a nod, which he counted as a major win for the day. “Okay then. That’s settled, so let’s continue on…”

 A/N: I’m going to cut this here. Next chapter will be the next day, or day one of the three days. (Who knows when that’ll be up—)

[rosenmarille]

First of all: that One Day bit is quality content. Second of all I read "3.5 for Holly" and am Highly Interested

HI yes! i will explain, however i first have to correct myself. its actually a part 2.5, not 3.5. like i mentioned in the other post, the part is called “heart unbound”, this is about 25 years after battle tendency, when holly is in her early 20s!!

the rest of this im gonna put under the cut

so the setting. joseph (43), suzie, and holly (21) live in new york, smokey is in georgia, lisa lisa (75) is Somewhere in the states, erina and speedwagon have passed away (sad). its 1963! the speedwagon foundation has continued expanding, with joseph and lisa lisa closely involved after speedwagons death. they’ve mostly moved their attention into new territory, but still have all their old research kept. stands aren't a thing yeeet, but its been long enough that the pillarmen have faded into unpleasant memory.

until one night the power at the swf hq goes out for just a moment too long, and santana manages to escape.

joseph and lisa lisa are contacted asap, and they decide to travel down to texas and find him (preferably take him out for good this time). holly, who has grown up hearing about jojo’s wild escapades, really wants to come along. she knows some hamon! she can defend herself! come on!! (yes i said it, holly learned hamon, do you think having lisa lisa for a grandmother would result in anything less?) anyway, joseph and lisa lisa Really don't want her to come since it could be really dangerous and they'd rather not put her in harm’s way.

so holly (rich, unsupervised) books a plane and goes after them.

we skip to texas!! joseph and lisa lisa investigate at hq and the surrounding area and find practically no trace of santana or where he might have gone. when holly arrives, she decides that since she can't look into hq without getting caught, she’ll ask around with locals, and manages to hear rumours about a new sort of cryptid (only appears at night, weird anatomy etc), both cattle and people have been disappearing, but on a very small scale. she looks into similar stories and realizes that santana must be moving south, though what he's planning, she doesn't know. but she will follow!! (and leave breadcrumbs for her family to pick up on this pattern too, she guesses. not so helpless now, huh?)

so this goes for a while, taking her down into mexico, until she is pretty sure that she can triangulate the missing people reports accurately enough to actually Find him. holly isnt stupid, she doesnt think she can win in a battle against a pillarman. what she’s hoping to do is prove herself to joseph and lisa lisa by prepping and helping out enough for them to then take care of the problem. she's an adult now and she doesnt appreciate being treated like a child. (you may say this contradicts how she behaved towards joseph in part 3, but to that i counter: she's in her 40s in that one, and her being an adult is established enough that she knows she can act a lil silli without that being put in question)

but hey!! she does find him!! she decides to stalk him for a bit, see what he does. so she happens to be there when santana attacks a young woman (midnight snack), who pulls a KNIFE instead of running away, so Holly rushes in and deflects an attack with a quick hamon swipe. santana has learned from his previous hamon encounter and instead of sticking around, he decides it isn't worth it and absconds instead (smart). (at this point you might notice this is the first fight of the part. yeah it be like that in this one. call it battle untendency) 

holly and the woman (who later introduces herself as Maria (no last name yet; but named after Maria Maria by Santana (lol)) also get out of dodge and hide out in an alley, where maria decides that she needs to know what the fuck that Thing was, yesterday. magic?? sparkling?? hello??? and hollys like uhh hah yes so. that's an ancient semi immortal vampire creature? and this is sunlight breathing magic, which he's allergic to. yea. and maria is like ................yeah okay i buy it. teach me sunlight breathing magic, i wanna come.

maria side paragraph! she's our oc and we love her. remember that awful scene from the santana arc with all those prisoners and the one kid who doesn't get sacrificed? that's her older brother. he was “let go” but “let go” basically did just mean “free to wander the desert and find civilisation maybe”, so when he did eventually find his way back home, he'd been severely traumatized, plus on death's door. other prisoners had been turned into vampires to test on the pillarman discovery, so the word “vampire” is something he'd have heard and conveyed to his family, who didn’t. really believe him. he also hasn't really recovered from that experience :( then the war happened and maria's dad served in it, and afterwards decided that his other child needed to know how to defend herself, and maria learned how to handle a knife, as well as how to physically fight. their family managed to avoid post war financial problems for the most part, and maria was able to finish her studies! she's a pilot :)  she is, however, harbouring very deep anger and resentment for what happened to her brother, and has not really had a face to direct that anger towards, so it's been on a relatively low burner for the most part, but now there’s talk of vampires and a person she can blame for her family’s trauma.

they exchange notes and she realizes that yeahh, that is pretty much exactly what her brother had told them, so it was true. hah :) yes actually, i would like to learn vampire killing magic please holly. and holly, who didn't really want to bring someone with her, but kind of does believe in accidents not being a thing, decides that yeah, she probably should bring maria along. and sure!! if they have to deal with sanata again, why not teach her hamon!! they share stories and continue to follow the trail while they train together, and become really close friends! jobro time.

we've now reached the first third of the story.

we travel further south!! soon, holly begins to realize......... ohh..... the temple they found santana in.. that's south of here, isn't it? oh huh. what could he want there?? the masks have been destroyed as far as she knows?? she doesn't know enough first hand to know what significance there could be, but the girls prepare for anything. maybe a big weapon the researchers had not been able to identify?? MOre pillarmen, secretly living underneath the temple??? 

(there are gonna be some scenes that involve lisa lisa and joseph figuring out where they need to go, and maybe also realizing who set that trail, maybe they have smth else going on, who knows) 

holly and maria follow santana and eventually do find the temple, and prepare to stake it out, hopefully hopefully not alerting him to their presence, because that would be.........bad. (tho tbh marias kinda itching to try out vampire begone magic. wouldn't You want to if you suddenly learned how?) neither of them have ever been here so they're honestly pretty floored by the temple interior, the tunnel that leads into the main chamber dark and uninviting, with who knows what hidden dangers are lurking about. 

and then they see him. santana is investigating the place where the pillar had been cut out of the structure, the stone masks crushed and broken, strewn around the floor, running his hands over the broken stone. Then he walks to one of the murals carved into the wall, a large one, similar to the one speedwagon had been investigating, with the 4 faces representing the pillarmen, and he lingers there. dips his head, then walks back to the empty space of the pillar and sits down where it was, crosslegged, and closes his eyes. and then he stays still. what does That mean?? 

the girls decide this is enough, they should fall back and formulate a proper plan, maybe wait for joseph and lisa lisa to catch up. buuuut we can't have that be the end of it, and so something happens, maybe one of them trips? steps on rubble that falls loose? they make a noise. and get noticed. 

change of plans! fight now! except there isn't an attack? they stay still but “i know you're there.” damn it. battle formation, stances ready, they make their way into the chamber, where santana hasn't moved at all. he's still sitting there, but he's looking at them now. holly asks what he's doing here, he asks the same back. she says not to play dumb, hes been killing people this whole time, he has to answer for that! and to that, santana honestly looks a bit confused because. has he? in his defense, he's not human, his prey is humans. pillarboy has to eat.

marias like “well? aren't you going to attack us?” and he's like “not unless you bother me.” and closes his eyes again. the girls aren't sure what to make of this.

santana side paragraph: first of all, this is a santana stan account. name one (1) thing he's done wrong, canonically. woke up in a strange place. captured?? got his bearings, tried to Leave and was accosted! shot some nazis (go king), and finally only snapped when joseph got mad he didn't laugh at his clownery. anyone would get murderous as a result. tried to escape further, ultimately was stopped and detained Again! morally, he's above joseph. 

so they're just standing now. since their earlier encounter where holly used hamon, santana refuses to talk more at first, but holly has the bright idea to get his trust by having maria restrain her and then stand back with her weapon -- a show of putting herself in a helpless position and promise she wont attack. that’s enough for santana to agree to come closer and have a proper conversation.

holly asks again why he's here exactly? what's here? and he tells her that if she Must know, he's waiting. waiting for what, she asks. and maria looks back at the carvings and realizes “oh. there should be 4 of them.” now santana looks mildly uncomfortable, and holly rememebers that “oh fuck, dad killed all of them.” and then “wait they were evil tho??” and then again “wait fuuck, didn't the leader guy say they left this one behind in mexico on purpose? oh man does he Know?” holly finds herself in the position of “not only do i have to tell this guy his friends aren't coming because they're Dead, they also kinda abandoned him.” yikes.

meanwhile maria is kinda pissed that her one chance at revenge might have just been taken from her. she still blames santana for what happened to her brother, and she refuses to let that go. she’s too stubborn and proud for that. and now, especally since holly seems to be focused on creating a bond, it feels like a slap in the face. so she kinda… snaps, ruining their chance at resolving this peacefully and causing santana to run off again. she and holly have a fight. it sucks.

soon after that joseph does find holly and he Does send her home. maria, after explaining her intentions, stays with them. holly is heartbroken :( after shes gone, joseph and lisa lisa make a plan to trap santana, aimed to go off in a few days prep, and during this, maria is starting to realize that that... really isnt the right thing to do... shes now had some time to sit alone with her guilt and regret about how she handled the situation, ssso she gets an idea on how to make up for it...

meanwhile holly is sitting at home and is sad, until suzie drives her somewhere in guise of going to a fancy lunch with smokey (whos in town), but really she drives her to the joestars airpad where her friend marua(!!) is already waiting in front of joseph’s plane, which, turns out, she hijacked in the south and flew all the way up here, and suzie tosses holly a bag with clothes and stuff and tells her to hurry up and get going :3

and hollys all "but what about lunch with mr smokey? :o" and suzie winks at her and says "don't worry, he's waiting for me to tell him everything went well at the restaurant ;)" and then holly gives her a big hug, runs to her friend and hugs Her, and they are off to fly back south to save some lives. on the way, maria apologizes and explains -- how she had harboured this resentment for so long that the sudden target for her blame put in front of her, plus the immediate removal of it were so jarring that she acted impulsively... she knows santana isnt at fault for what happened with her brother... and now she just hopes they make it in time.

as luck would have it, they catch up with joseph and lisa lisa just in time to jump between them and santana (maria accidentally cuts off joseph’s prosthetic hand in the process and freaks the fuck out before realizing it’s fine) and try to talk it out. it’s a tense few minutes, but holly is determined and stubborn, and she manages to get her dad and grandma to see her side of things and santana is saved! they find something for him to eat, giving him the energy to heal his wounds. pillarmen absorbing shit never gets old.

And from there it’s mostly just everything getting settled down and smoothed out. they get back in touch with the swf and tell them the problem is handled. santana turns out to be a relatively peaceful dude when his life isn’t being threatened, and he becomes a good friend with all four of them, but especially holly and maria. they help teach him about the modern world and he decides that he’s going to do some travelling and learn about the history of his culture and other ancient mesoamerican cultures he interacted with in his youth, and he shares the things he learns with the swf so they can get the info about where theyre needed etc.  maria gets hooked up with one of the many therapists we decided work at the swf that has experience with the supernatural things she and her brother have gone through. holly, maria, and santana stay in touch and go on regular trips together. holly receives many post cards.

it’s all really good and happy :) thats heart unbound baybee!! <33

[atlas-of-a-human-soul]

Fix Me (doctor/soulmate AU) {7}

Summary: Dealing with the truth isn’t easy, especially when there’s a soulmate bond involved.

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing

Word count: 4000+

Fix Me (doctor/soulmate AU) series Masterlist

A/N - heavily inspired by Grey’s anatomy, my own experiences and thoughts, but also by songs: Birdy - Not about angels, Bear’s den - Fortress, Matthew and the atlas - Out of the darkness, Harry Styles - Falling, Kodaline - Wherever you are, Isak Danielson - Love me Wrong, Dove Cameron - Remember me, Tom Odell - Can’t pretend, The XX - Angels, Coldplay - Fix you, Coldplay - The scientist, Elvis Presley - Can’t help falling in love.

I really hope you guys like it! Feedback is always wanted and appreciated, no matter how small or big it is!

If you want to be tagged for future parts, reply down below.

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Ikari (noun) -  anger/strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility

Very few moments in our lives are time-stamped, just frozen in one particular second of an achingly long minute of a horribly long hour. That's when time stands still and we're left with a choice - to be the force that makes it move or be a victim of the one who does and Ethan wasn't sure what to choose.

Taking her quivering lips and trembling chin into account, those beautiful eyes of hers clouded with doubt and hurt but not hate...even then she couldn't hate him. Love and hate are the same train, only in forwards or reverse gear.  Her chest rose quickly with each breath, her exhales coming out as huffs instead of proper airflow and her hands laid at her side as defenseless as she must feel. She has blood in her eyes while blood drains from his face.

He doesn't feel like he deserves to be the one to end the silence. It's not as if he wouldn't be happy to be a father now or many times after as well, but it's the way it's come to be and it's the deceit that had forced this moment of reckoning.

"Nothing to say? Because I have plenty. To. Say." She spat the words out like they're poison collecting on the tip of her tongue, her eyes narrowing as tears begin to spill and Ethan really has no words to say because what the hell could he ever say that would make it better? And she’s fighting for the good memories of them to remain unaltered, to remember the reasons to be kind. She’s fighting to keep herself empathic even as every terrible thing she had predicted is coming true in this instant. For Y/N, that's the betrayal, Ethan’s lack of willingness to fight the negative thoughts and think the best of her, to recall her soul as it was when they first met instead of loving the soul that evolved by his side.

"You kept this from me for six months, Ethan! You watched me squirm whenever I asked about your soulmate and you said NOTHING!" Her hands bawl into fists and the veins in her neck become prominent and while he swallows thickly, Ethan prepares for the worst of it. She's just starting and she has every right to get it off her chest and onto him. He deserves it all.

"I've been haunted by a soulmate that doesn't exist! God, Ethan, do you even have any idea how fucking distraught I've been over that?! And then this!" Pointing at the positive test at his feet, Ethan can tell her hands are shaky but so is her entire body. Her emotions are completely in control, her rage at its peak, but he can't help the tiny bit of joy inside him at the fact that she's still there. She may be screaming at him, but she's there, not running away like she would have done months ago but staying long enough to at least argue.

"I've mourned our children, Ethan!" Her voice is raspy and devastatingly painful, his heart desperately flailing inside his chest as her grief overcomes her and he can't touch her, he can't make it go away. This time, he's the cause instead of being her cure.  In her pain she thought he’s the bad guy, yet in truth he’s drowning in a sea of uncried tears too.

"I've mourned the children I thought we couldn't have! I've let that go, given up on it entirely because I wanted you more than -", her voice breaks and a sob fills the pause that wrecks Ethan from inside out and his own tears fall uncontrollably and while he knew it would be better if he stays on the other side of the room, he had taken a step closer and she didn't take one back.

Swallowing a lump inside her throat, she shakes her head at him and speaks again, no longer screaming but her quiet tone is making it worse. It hit him hard. Her words are like nails and hammers breaking his heart apart.

"I would have given it all up for you. I didn’t give a fuck about the soulmate I might have, because you're all I can see. I would have given up having children of my own, for you. I would have forgiven you for lying to me all this time, Ethan, I would have. I was going to." Wiping her tears off, she rubbed her nose absentmindedly before her gaze fell on that test again, her own heart aching.

Did she want kids? Yes.

Did she want Ethan's kids? Definitely.

But like this? It wasn't quite the way she imagined it at all and not at a time where she's finishing her intern year. There were far too many things she wanted to do differently, to make it special. Who even gets pregnant by accident in this world anyway? She felt like a cosmic joke.

"I didn't even fucking care that you lied, I was just happy you were finally mine and then I remember the times you insisted on condoms and I though why not fuck with him a little?” Chuckling in disbelief, she actually smiled through the tears but it was far from happiness on her face.

“Just to relieve some the tension and I don't even know why I took the test, probably because of what Grayson asked today, but no matter how badly I wanted kids with you, this isn't the way or time I wanted it to happen." Moving to the bed, Y/N let herself sit on the edge, folding her hands in her lap as she lets out a long, heavy sigh. Her sigh was of a softly deflating, it was as if a tension had lifted yet left her with a melancholy instead of relief.

"I love you. I really fucking do. I just don't like you right now."

Moira - a person’s fate or destiny

Ethan couldn't stay away any longer after finally hearing her say those words and mean them, no shooter with a gun to her head, no nothing. In fact, she said it after he royally fucked up, that's got to mean something, right? Moving toward her as if gravity itself demands it of him, Ethan knows this might end badly for him, but it's a risk he has to take. For her, he has to.

Kneeling down, he got in her line of sight and while she rolled her eyes at him at first, she fixed her gaze on him after.

"I was scared you'd leave me. That you'd run and I'd never see you again. And I fucked up, I should have told you and I just...the longer it went on, the harder it was to...justify it all. But none of it was justified, because I never stopped being afraid." Daring to lay his palm on her thigh, Ethan nearly smiles when she doesn't tense up or move away, allowing him a mercy he didn't feel worthy of. Fear is an incredibly powerful influence, it is also a disguised demon. But Y/N? She’s always been too kind, too patient and he never really knew why up until now – she loves him just as much he loves her.

"I understand why you didn't tell me. I do. I just wish you had more faith in what we share...in me. You were everything and I don't know how to go back to that? Was I ever just a girl you love or was I always the soulmate you felt the obligation to love?" And that hurt him. That insecurity, the doubt, the unwillingness to believe she is without a doubt the only woman he would ever love, it broke him.

"With or without it, I'd have lived a thousand years if it meant you'd be waiting for me in the end. There is no one, past or present, I would put before you. I love you, with everything I am - heart and twenty one grams of soul." Sniffling, Ethan laid his other palm on her leg as well, holding onto her as if she's his sole anchor to the world.

"And I fucked up, big time, and I'd love nothing more than to make it up to you and it's not how I planned it either, but I think we have a chance to make something beautiful here. If you’ll have me, I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you", leaning toward his nightstand, Ethan opened the drawer and pulled out a tiny black box. Never in his life had he felt like he couldn't breathe, as if his lungs are burning for their dying breath, but when her eyes widen as he adjusts his position, making sure he's on one knee as he should be, Ethan forgot how to breathe.

"Marry me." Mustering the words with the last of his strength he watched her in hope, aware this is yet another thing he didn't want to do quite like this but it felt right. If she needed to know how much he loves her, he would go the extra mile.

Most soulmates don't get married because why would they when fate had sealed their fates together anyway. But he wanted to do that. He wanted to show her his love is stronger than anything and that she isn't just his soulmate, but the love of his life - his best friend and lover and his favorite person. Without her, he didn't see a future at all.

“You want me to”, she paused, trying to say the next words calmly instead of freaking out as openly as her heart is, “marry you?”

Seeing him nod had only fueled the last bit of anguish inside her, but then he smiles so nervously, revealing just how scared he truly is and she doesn’t want to make it worse because she doesn’t even know what she wants to do with everything that had been revealed. It’s always been impossible to truly resist him, feeling as if it might kill her, but this time she didn’t want to resist. Y/N didn’t want to fight anymore. What she needed is Ethan, even if he’s the last person she should care for right now.

Reaching for the box, she takes it from him gently. Taking a moment to look at the beautiful ring, she swallows thickly before closing the box altogether. His lips part open as a quiet gasp leaves him, his eyes forming more tears as she sets the box back on the bed and turns to him.

“I don’t think we need to make major decisions right now. If it’s alright with you, I’d rather just go to bed – no talking, just you and me.” And he can hear just how defeated, how drained she is and he can’t even imagine what it is for her and how heavily the baby must be affecting her, so he doesn’t challenge her. Swallowing every word he wants to say, biting back his tongue, Ethan just nods as he sits up, next to her.

Wrapping an arm around her, Ethan pulls her into his side, holding tightly as her arms circle around him and hold him closer. He doesn’t wait, moving them back onto the bed, not leaving her for a single second. It might as well be the last time she allows him to hold her so close, so intimately that he can feel her heart beating against his chest and he won’t waste the chance. He didn’t care about anything but her love - he’d have her love him wrong if she can’t love him right. Anything, but to be away from her - this night or any other. 

Instead of creating space, he kisses her forehead and while she tried her best not to, a fleeting smile appeared on her lips. Draping a leg over his, she hides her head just under his chin, resting it on his chest as his fingers thread through her hair at the back of her neck. And just like that, in their silence, Ethan and Y/N laid together until emotions settled and their eyes closed for the night – too in love to let each other go.

Metanoia (n.) - the journey of changing one’s mind, heart, way of life

When morning came, Y/N was surprised to find herself alone in bed. She figured Ethan must have been paged and while a pang of hurt, jealousy even, followed, she couldn’t be mad at him for that. After all, she understands it comes with the job and while she hoped he’d take the day off to figure things out and make a definite choice on what they will do moving forward, she sighed. He’s got her devotion, but she really hates him sometimes.

She doesn’t want to fight him, nor sleep alone ever again, but this isn’t just like any other fight – this is a big deal, possibly the biggest of them all. How can she forgive him? Is it fair to crave him like the very air she breathes at the same time as her heart is wide open, bleeding because of his actions? But then her hand lingers on her stomach and she almost smiles with the thought of a small part of him being with her now, even when he’s not really there.

Flinging an arm to the empty place beside her, she finds herself wishing his beautiful smile was there to make the day lighter. Even now, she wished for his arms around her, to hear him say he loves her most ardently.

Groaning, she shakes her head at her own stupid self. Perhaps now when she had experienced soulmate love, a part of her forgave her parents for the way they acted – not with her but each other. Her mother forgave his father for the worst of sins, something Y/N couldn’t fathom at the time, but she’s now in a similar situation and it’s exhausting being angry with him…especially when new life is growing inside her and it’s a part of the person she loves most in the world. And no matter how sudden and unexpected it all is, she would never be like her parents. Her child would never feel unwanted or abandoned, she swore it. Even if it’s probably just a clump of cells, she fell in love with the baby. Ethan fucked up, but this baby isn’t guilty of any sin. The baby is a gift, she decided. And she’ll make him suffer, but Ethan is a gift as well and eventually she’ll forgive him. She’ll be graceful, forgiving, become his warmth in the cold of his long, lonely life. People think that forgiveness is weakness, but it's absolutely not; it takes a very strong person to forgive and if anything, Y/N had become a strong individual with so much love to give and she’d give it to him…and their baby.

Yawning, she stretched before sitting up, a little woozy but in need of food. She had barely had anything to eat yesterday and her growling stomach wasn’t shy about reminding her of that fact. However, as she put his shirt on, she found herself missing him dearly. Resting her cheek on her own shoulder just to feel his scent better, she realized just how ridiculous she is, yet she enjoyed it anyway.

Tiptoeing to the kitchen, she quickly realized she was sorely mistake. Ethan didn’t abandon her this morning at all, he was just trying to be… for the lack of a better word, Ethan.

The table is set, her favorite flowers in the middle, stacks of pancakes already prepared. She tilts her head to the opened fridge and a man’s ass being the only visible thing at this point and she’d know his ass anywhere. As the fridge closes, she’s met with a peculiar sight – his hands are full with different dressings, he’s even got a pack of cream in his mouth and she can’t help but shake her head at him fondly, gracing him with a small smile.

“Ey”, he manages something resembling a greeting, his eyes wider as if he got caught doing something he shouldn’t be doing. She’s fast by his side, grabbing the pack from his mouth before she says “Hey” too. He can’t help but notice his shirt on her, but he thought it would be safer not to comment on it.

“Since eggs make you sick, I thought you might like pancakes.” Ethan shrugged with an innocent, but hopeful smile. Exhaling through her nose, Y/N raises an eyebrow.

“I’m fine with eggs, E. It was part of the…joke. But I won’t argue, I love pancakes.”

And so they ate, glancing at each other awkwardly and while it’s completely unacceptable, Ethan wished he’d let him touch her stomach. The baby’s merely a blob at this point, but he really wanted to feel her stomach, to feel connected to both of them.

“Do you think Grayson is free today?” Y/N breaks his inner monologue. Blinking fast, Ethan nods, wiping his mouth with a napkin.

“Yeah. Why?”

“Because I want to do a checkup. I want to know everything is in order.” And that’s when Ethan stopped blinking altogether. In fact, he barely swallowed the last piece without choking.

“You want my brother to”, he stopped before he made things worse but Y/N picked up on what he means easily, rolling her eyes at him in irritation.

“I want him to do the ultrasound if it’s possible, a few labs, not a vaginal examination. I’ll ask Addy for that.” She explains, making it very, very clear she had no intention of letting Grayson anywhere near her lady parts.

Nodding, Ethan texted Grayson immediately, making it clear he’s to clear his schedule if he needs to and right when breakfast was over, the pair got ready and went into the clinic.

“Can I be happy for you?” Grayson whisper shouted in excitement as he lead them inside the room, all but clapping like a little kid, trying his best to ignore the glare Ethan is trying to kill him with.

“I’m still very angry with you. What you can do for me is do an ultrasound.” Y/N sent him a glare of her own, definitely more dangerous than Ethan’s, enough to make Grayson pipe down and press his lips together to hide any possible excitement as Y/N laid down and bared her stomach for him. Ethan settled on the chair beside the bed, his hand taking hers, interlocking their fingers and while she did glance at him in surprise, she didn’t fight his touch, rather tightened her hold on his hand in response.

“Did you draw blood?” Grayson questions as he starts the examination, trying to ease the tension that suffocated him. It’s evident she isn’t happy with either of the twins, but he didn’t expect to take so much heat for this. They’ve been friends this entire time, he thought it would have eased her anger but it seems that’s exactly what fueled it. He should have pushed Ethan to tell her sooner rather than later, maybe then they’d be laughing as they’re doing something so significant, something he’s dreaming of. He can’t wait to meet his soulmate, to fall in love and have kids and be more than what he is now. It’s nice to have more time to travel the world and find yourself, but the past fifty years have been too much. He’s been ready for a while now, he just can’t wait for her to be ready too.

“Yes. It will be back in a few. They did me a favor and put it first for testing.”

“I know you’re mad at me, princess, but this is the first baby Dolan and I’m still excited to be an uncle.” Grayson points out, only making Y/N confused.

“Didn’t you say your sister found her soulmate and is happy in Australia?”

“She did. But she isn’t romantic with her soulmate. They live across the street, but she’s married to someone else. They adopted three kids though. But it’s been a while since she died. Cameron found her soulmate when she was thirty and they had fifty two years together. We see her grandkids though.” Ethan responded, somber as he remembers the sister he loved dearly even if they didn’t always get along. She was always closer to Grayson and he struggled most when she passed even though they watched her grow old and she was very, very happy. That’s the curse of living so long – you see those you care for find their happiness and die while you’re frozen at twenty. It’s what Grayson fears the most – watching his brother grow old and die while he’s stuck as he is now.

Grayson nods, confirming Ethan’s words before licking his lips and his eyes narrow, making Y/N frown. Something doesn’t feel right. Grayson is never quiet, even if he’s trying not to get himself killed by her and maybe it has something to do with remembering his sister, but he’s too focused on the screen and his forehead is starting to glisten from sweat. The guy didn’t shut up the whole time as he did a breast ultrasound, so why did he quiet down now?

“You’re quiet. I don’t like it.” She spoke up, craning her neck to try and see the monitor and Ethan did the same.

Clearing his throat, Grayson turned to her with a small smile.

“Just need more gel.” Adding more of the cool gel on her stomach, Grayson emerges himself further into the ultrasound just as a knock on the door makes Y/N gasp.

“It’s Addy, I have the labs.” It’s time for Ethan to sweat because while Y/N may be perceptive and see that his brother is acting weird, he’s been with him for over a hundred years and he knows when something is off right from the start. Ethan sighs as the doctor enters. The sigh that came was a signal, not of his resolve leaving but of the level his tension had reached. Doctors aren’t usually ones picking up results, especially not experienced ones like Abby. Perhaps it’s special treatment because it’s Y/N and well, him, but he couldn’t help the odd feeling inside his chest that something’s amiss.

“Hello, dear. I got the call from the laboratory, so I thought I’d pick these up for you.” She smiles sweetly at Y/N and only then notices how serious everyone is. Seeing Ethan’s hand in Y/N’s only makes her smile wider, showing just how happy she is for Ethan to have found someone like Y/N. Addy wouldn’t comment on it, but she was wishing them a bright future.

“Thank you, Addison.” Grayson nods at the iPad, gesturing for her to hand it over and she’s quick to do so before excusing herself, leaving them alone.

“I swear to God if you don’t start speaking, I will start breaking things.” Y/N’s voice is low and threatening and her eyes are hard, but it doesn’t make it easier for Grayson at all.

“Your blood-work shows higher levels of Beta HCG, something that would show in a pregnancy.” Grayson starts, only to get interrupted with a very relieved chuckle from Ethan who was getting worse at hiding his joy over the pregnancy with each passing moment.

“You scared me. I thought there was something wrong.” But Ethan’s smile died down when he noticed Grayson’s gloomy face. There was no hints of joy on his face at all, just confusion and worry.

“There is something wrong, isn’t it?” Y/N forced herself to say it, to hear herself admit it. She wants this baby so bad, even if it isn’t the right timing nor way, but she does want the baby. Just this morning she felt…lucky for being able to get pregnant after thinking it wasn’t in the cards for her. She felt hopeful, and she didn’t feel lonely anymore. With Ethan and a tiny Ethan around, she saw her future filled with smiles and now? She couldn’t grasp it. It felt like she lost everything.

“Say it.” She insisted, because she needed to hear it. She needed to know. And though he knew he shouldn’t, Grayson said it.

“I can’t find the heartbeat.”

*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *

Tags: @beinscorpio​​​​ @peacedolantwins​​​​ @heyits-claire​​​​ @dolandolll​​​​ @godlydolans​​​​ @dolanstwintuesday​​​​ @ethanhes​​​​ @iwastornsincethestart @graydolan12​​​​  @zeusgrayson​​​​ @libradolan​​​​ @justordinaryjen​​​​ @pineappledolan​​​​ @graysavant​​​​ @voguekristens @imayoutubere @livexdolan​​​​  @shadowsndaisies​​​​ @maybgrayson​​​​​ @dolans4lyfe​​​​​ @mendesficsxbombay​​​​​ @fxkthatdairy @sharpdolan​​​ @hollietee1​

Anyone crossed out wasn’t able to be tagged, probably an issue on Tumblr’s side, sorry.

[bts-story]

I just read your last reaction and could you do a oneshot for virgin jungkook, namjoon or jimin (whichever you prefer) it's sounds so adorable

First Things Comes First — Jungkook 

Characters: Jungkook X ReaderRated: I for I’m back bitcheeees

There were always a few things Jungkook did when nervous, particularly divided in three obnoxious steps.

First of all, when he came across Seokjin, knowing he did something he shouldn’t have or hinted of something wrong to anyone, his heart would start beating faster. Quickly, his vital organ would start pumping blood with more fervour with each second passing, so much Jungkook could literally hear it ringing in his ears. His hands would water a little bit, clammy and uncomfortable hanging against his sides like a middle-school boy ready to get scolded.

Before an important exam, before any competition or any event whatsoever that meant a lot to him, Jungkook would start biting his nails. He would eat the flesh around his fingers, teeth digging through his skin like a mad piranha. He would dance on the sole of his feet, balancing his weight back and forth to try and occupy himself, trying not to gnaw at his brain too much.

The worst stage of Jungkook’s nervousness was this. When the boy would develop some difficulties to inhale air down to his lungs, when he would stutter on his words without so much of success in aligning two words after another, when his mouth would run dry and get irritated with what anyone would say to him was things only hinting anyone of much nervousness the boy was feeling at the time.

However, right here, right then, Jungkook’s nervousness reached a high he never thought was possible before. On a scale of one to ten, ten being the epitome of nervous, Jungkook was probably feeling a thousand points, fair and square. He would probably develop a tachycardia much very soon, probably even went into cardiac arrest if he kept staring.

She’s there. Naked.

The glory of a goddess sculpted by the hands of Michelangelo himself. An angel fallen off the sky and God must be crying ever since for losing such beauty. Her breasts are full and plump, not very big but so smooth and delicate it has Jungkook’s mind running blank at the sight. His eyes travelled down however, her belly isn’t flat, it isn’t big either but there’s enough skin for Jungkook to grab and caress if ever he dared to. And then, down, down, down was that forbidden fruit men could start wars for.

Jungkook’s cheeks are flushed red, and he should look away. He should because being a witness to such beauty should be punished by the laws of the universe, a worthless mortal like him shouldn’t have the possibility, the rightto let his eyes wander around a body like this. But there isn’t any dark angel appearing out of nowhere to drag him to face a justice, there aren’t policemen knocking on the door to punish him of any crime.

They are here. Alone. Just the two of them.

“Don’t you just stand there, Jeon Jungkook. Your turn.” Her voice is like honey, but Jungkook must be mistaken because all he hears are doves singing the most floristics of music. He shakes his head painfully, forcefully trying to pull himself out of his trance because, somehow, this should start getting a little bit creepy.

Jungkook clears his throat, tares his eyes away from her because suddenly, it’s too much. His heart rose up to stuck on his throat but it anywise it keeps beating faster with each second passing. It must be at least fifty thousand degrees in the room, and Jungkook has trouble breathing. He needs to work on his inspirations for a moment, breathing in and out, in and out because he’s sure he’s going to pass out very soon if he doesn’t.

Jungkook reaches behind his head, tucks out his own shirt to reveal a toned chest, one he worked over and over again at the gym before and his effort might have pulled off because the sound she makes when she takes a glimpse of his torso is enough to make a smile curl up Jungkook’s lips. He tried not to think too much when he unzips his denim jeans, pulling down his boxers right at the same time and it’s unfair.

Anatomy is fucked up, it’s something unfair and unwise because there isn’t any reason for a man to show so easily how riled up and excited he is in front of anybody so beautiful. There isn’t one single and proper purpose for a manhood to rise and grow fully in all its glory while a woman’s anatomy only hides anything but lets the imagination running. The excitation could be there, but hidden beneath the surface of her skin, boiling inside and if Jungkook never paid really much attention to his science’s classes, he could have felt conscious of the oblivious boner reaching his lower tummy.

She bit his lips. And she soon closes the gap between them to catch a prize in Jungkook’s mouth. Their lips crash together, their tongues meet and Jungkook can’t hold himself much longer, his hands find her hips, her back, her butt – anything in his reach, really.

It’s the first time. There hasn’t been one moment during the twenty-one years of Jungkook’s life where he found himself in this very situation. There hasn’t been anything in his life that could compare to this right moment, and he may have waited for it his entire life, everything just seems surreal now. No matter how long he dreamt of this scenario, no matter how many times he pictures the scene in his head during boring classes or joked about it with close friends, nothingcould have prepared him for this.

“You have no idea what you do to me,” and it’s probably a lie coming from her lips because sheis the one to do things to Jungkook’s body and brain. It has him burn neurons thinking too much of what to with his hands or how to move his tongue inside her mouth. In all, it doesn’t change the fact that the way she’s feeling too.

“Youhave no idea what you do to me,” Jungkook echoes playfully and he tries so hard to look composed, as if he knew what he was doing even though he clearly doesn’t have one single clue whatsoever.

She chuckles, something Jungkook fell in love with the very first time he heard it. “I think I have a pretty good idea, actually.” The thing he felt when she took a fistful of his length, grabbing his skin to pump up and down with more wit than not, Jungkook thinks there might have been one or two curses flowing out his mouth that would’ve surely own him at least two slaps at the back of his head coming from any of his elders in any other situation but this very one.

His mind is blank. He doesn’t understand anything happening, couldn’t bring himself into believing this isn’t one of his many fantasies because, it all happens so fast. There is this time gap where he suddenly finds himself on top of her down on the bed, kissing her body wherever he can reach with his lips. Her nails are digging inside the flesh of his biceps and shoulders, but it doesn’t hurt much, not really.

There this moment when she goes down on him that he’s not quite able to describe, that he wouldn’t even be able to tell-tale to anyone even to save his own life. It’s a secret he’ll keep all to himself, something that belongs to him and him alone. However, the moment when his tip brushes against her entrance, a promise of wet and hot owned by her body, Jungkook thinks this is probably the brightest moment of his life.

It’s true to say the boy excels in many fields of activity, anyone could be witness of his dancing skills along the sides of his singing that probably equals highly to the words he spits while rapping. Good grades, many friends, he pretty much succeeds in more or less every sport. But this is new, he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know how to move, or where to aim or what to do with his hands.

He saw movies. Of course, he can’t deny his teenage self, can’t deny his hormones messing with his head, obliging him to search on the internet and take a relief of himself because the pain is sometimes too much, and in the end, he’s entitled to the phrase boys will be boys.

It’s something else. It’s nothing Jungkook ever felt before. When the tip of his length finally crosses the threshold of her womanhood, it’s tight and hot and wet and it’s all he ever expected, yet the sensation brings stars to his head. It makes him dizzy, and if he was in a cartoon show, there would be stars circling around his head to testify of his feelings right now.

He needs directions, words flowing out of her mouth which doesn’t necessarily makes him feel stupid or think he’s dumb, on the contrary, he’s leading to do things that would make her reach a high. One that was so anticipated and awaited like the next superstar. Jungkook thinks it’s not entirely that difficult, that he always panics over stupid things – or maybe over things that shouldn’t really deserve a reaction like this one anyway.

But as he keeps bucking his hips back and forth, trying so hard to keep a pace where he doesn’t get to stop, she whispers things in his ears which send butterflies to fly all around his stomach. It’s a weird sensation to describe, but it’s there and it’s real and Jungkook might feel nervous, he thinks it’ll be alright.

Because she’s here, and she’s his. And his hers.

—– 

Guyyyyyyyyys, hello again!!! 

It’s so good to be back omg; I honestly didn’t though I’d take this blog again, but I missed you SO MUCH actually. Anyways, coronavirus sucks. Stay safe guys, stay home and don’t get sick! 

See you SO SOON!! I’m so EXCITED!! 

- Nageoire 

[omega-deku]

So I would love to progress on my art and try comics any tips? ÙwÚ

Hi! I’m so sorry about the late reply. D: I hope you don’t mind if I take this opportunity to address all the anon messages about how we can improve as artists. 

I have a tough time answering this question because there is so much I need to learn. I’m super flattered that some of you feel that my art is good enough to ask me for tips, first of all!! So thank you, guys. <3

It’s a struggle because I only recently started taking up art again. So I’ve forgotten a lot of the things. So I’m probably not the best person to ask about this.

I used to draw all the time as a kid, but after high school, I stopped drawing. I stopped drawing for almost a decade, pretty much. I really regret it. I feel like I could have come such a long way if I did keep going. My parents really discouraged me from pursuing art, even just as a hobby, too. Even when I left home (I’m back now tho), my ex-spouse, greatly discouraged me from doing art too. I mean, “proper” art. They told me my art wasn’t “real art” because it’s not studio art, it’s “sellout” art, like anime/cartoons/fanart. I had even worse self-esteem as I do now, and I listened to them and gave up. I convinced myself I hated drawing. 

Please don’t deny yourself things that make you feel engaged and connected. If drawing makes you feel good, if it makes you not realize how much time has passed and makes you feel like you’re accomplishing things, even little by little, please don’t stop. Even if you suffer from depression and feel like things like this are pointless, remember that just doing things in general will help you. Drawing is an awesome way to get into the flow state. To me personally, it’s almost like a meditative state and I find it helpful in dealing with chronic pain and mental health issues. 

Anyways, I’ll try to compile some advice sort of things.

ART IN GENERAL

1. Draw what you enjoy! I think the most important thing is to draw what you like. It’s okay if it’s “dumb stuff”. Draw your favorite characters or pairings from your favorite tv shows if that tickles your fancy! You’re much more likely to be spending more time drawing if you’re drawing stuff you like. And as long as you’re drawing, you’re improving. (But still, challenge yourself and get out of your comfort zone!)

Especially for those of you who are planning to pursue art as a career, it’s essential that you don’t view practicing art as a chore. 

2. Draw from life. If you really want to take your art to the next level, drawing from life is vital! I think many of us have come across artists who are just amazing, but there are things that look a little “off”. For example, the anatomy doesn’t look quite right, or the perspective is a little wonky. Things like that can be a tell that they’ve learned to draw from other people’s art rather than from life. Or just haven’t practiced the basics enough. (My art isn’t amazing or anything close to that lmao, but it definitely suffers from this. I need lots of life drawing practice.)

There is nothing wrong with learning from your favorite artists, but to really train your “artist’s eye”, you need to strip away all the stylistic choices and go back to the basics. Training that Eye is one of the most crucial things you could do as an artist. 

Just take a piece of paper, a pencil and start drawing what you see. If you can, take figure drawing classes at your local community college, or draw the animals you see at the zoo. Sit on a bench and draw the scenery in front of you. Over time, you’ll start to recognize common patterns, simplify/think of things in terms of lines and shapes.

If you can’t afford a class or have the ability to go outside easily, drawing from photographs can be the next best thing. (See the Resources below for an online figure drawing tool.) I’m not experienced enough to definitively say why this isn’t the #1 idea, but from what I hear, there are things that you’ll miss out on, such as subtle shifts in shadows, colors, and other things that will happen from small movements in pose changes, a cloud moving, or whatever else. A different “feel”, if you will.

With the digital art boom, a lot of artists are learning how to do cool digital effects and fancy things, but forgoing basic anatomy, perspective, shading, etc. Which is all fine if you’re just having fun, but isn’t the best idea if you’re really serious about improving. Practice the fundamentals!

(If you have been dreaming about CalArts at one point like I did when I was in high school, one advice I came across from everyone who went there was to draw from life. All the time. It’s not an answer I expected from people who draw funny looking characters all day. You mean all these people who draw such simplified cartoon people and animals can actually draw like masters? Perfectly rendered bowls of fruit? I didn’t realize how much work goes into animating simple characters.)

3. Put in the time. 

It’s really easy to get suckered into just watching “how to improve” videos all day and thinking about improving. Watching how other artists work is an important learning tool, but you’ll never actually make progress if you aren’t practicing. 

Sometimes, the best thing to do is to not think about it. Just do it. 

It’s like when I’m spending a whole lotta time thinking about getting physically fit than just, you know.. just doing it. “Tomorrow for sure.” 

It may seem like it’s worthless, but doing those lame 5 push-ups a day instead of the 20-minute workout you wanted to put in, is better than nothing at all. You are making progress, no matter how small it may seem.  

Make it a habit to practice every day. That way, you don’t even hesitate. It’s as automatic as brushing your teeth.

All the artists you see who have fantastic, awe-inspiring art may seem like Unreachable Gods sometimes, but those artists didn’t just pull that out of their ass one day. They put in hours and hours and hours of work. Let’s not disrespect other artists by ignoring that and chalking it up to “talent”. No one is born with an innate ability to draw. WE can get there too if we practice!

I want to get good enough to draw the things I have in my head one day!

Some resources that may be helpful:

Draw a Box - This is a site for free lessons for absolute beginners. Look under “Lessons” to learn. The creator of the site is the mod for r/ArtFundamentals. You can post your work there to get critiqued.

Check out Proko’s videos on gesture drawing, art fundamentals, etc. Daily routines of successful artists.

Use this site to practice figure drawing, gesture drawing - Set aside some time to practice drawing people and animals every day. Start trying to see things as lines, shapes, and go big. Don’t get too caught up in the details, and tiny drawings. Learning to draw fast (not draw FAST as in speed, but as in capture the gesture in a post, the “feel” of the movement) will force you to do this more, and with more experience, make your figures less stiff looking. 

And it’s okay if you’re aren’t good at it. You’ll make loads and loads of shit drawings until you can get decent. 

I’m most definitely in this stage right now, trying to train my Artist’s Eye. As in, I can’t just draw a figure from memory. I don’t really know what goes where without a reference, or how they move, etc. You can tell by how stiff my drawings look.

Lulusketches How to Improve video - She has similar advice, but her point about looking at “Art of” books something I have come across from multiple professional artists; Her advice on worrying about finding your own “style” is really good too. Do challenges like she said!

Her playlist of art tutorials & advice is great. They’re short and sweet. Her beginner digital art tutorial got me started on digital art (the one with Ginny Weasley). 

Not free ($30 a month), but these online Schoolism classes look helpful. It’s run by Bobbie Chiu. I saw some great reviews and I want to try them someday. They’re taught by artists in the animation/film industry. But you gotta have a basic grasp on digital art/photoshop for many of the classes, I think? I’m not 100% sure. They’re pre-recorded video lessons. 

You can pay more for feedback from the teachers, but you can also just use it as a self-learning guide. 

This drawing faces from any angle video was pretty helpful for me. The artist has loads of other tutorials.

COMICS

I don’t feel qualified enough to give much advice on comics. I mean, I don’t even draw the lines for the boxes, haha.. However, these comic books are basically required reading for some courses:

Scott McCloud’s Understanding Comics & Making Comics.

I can’t remember which one it is that I read, I think it was Making Comics? But wow, if I remember correctly, it was FULL of really useful things about how to make effective comics. I lost the book while moving years ago, but it was FANTASTIC learning material. I loved every panel of it. 

He talks about everything from perspective, placement of characters, speech bubbles, how big panels should be, etc. 

If you can afford it, get a used one and start reading! Even if you don’t want to make comics just yet, it’s super interesting. 

[fancoloredglasses]

Dungeons & Dragons episode review Module 1-13: P-R-E-S-T-O Spells Disaster

[Show-related images are owned by Wizards of the Coast and Marvel Entertainment. Please don’t sue]

It’s never a good sign when the title of the adventure includes one of the party members...

We have another adventure without Venger getting involved, and is the final adventure for the first part of the campaign (i.e. the last episode of season 1) We also have the DM once again borrowing heavily from folklore. As always, Watch cartoons Online for your viewing pleasure

Where the PCs are: Bobby is the only party member still at 5th level, while Diana and Sheila are 7th level; the rest are 6th. I’ll guess Presto and maybe Bobby will level up.

We open with the party already in deep trouble as they’re running away from something. What are they running from?

You know, Stegosauruses are herbivores, so they really must have pissed it (or the DM) off bad. Just watch out for the Thagomizer

(Thanks to TIL Destiny Edition)

[BTW, I love that the scientific community adopted Gary Larson’s joke name of that part of a stegosaurus anatomy as its official name]

Hank wants to stand and fight, but for once everyone listens to Eric and keeps running. They eventually run into a cave too small for the dinosaur to follow. Unfortunately, it’s occupied by Orcs.

Hank immediately fires, scattering the group. Unfortunately, the party is quickly overwhelmed...

...except Presto (we’ll get to him in a minute) The leader threatens to toss the party into a crater filled with lava (with 6 more Orcs, so that’s 16 Orcs (there are 10 in the above image) We need to keep a proper tally just in case the party doesn’t flee or an NPC doesn’t show up to save the day)

Eric pleads with Presto (who managed to hide while everyone else was being gathered) to cast something. You know, Eric is easily Presto’s biggest critic of his abilities (not that it isn’t warranted; I mean, Presto is a horrible wizard...) but is almost always the first to tell Presto to cast something. Anyway, Presto conjures up a windstorm that drives off the Orcs. Unfortunately, it pulls a Dorothy on the rest of the party, leaving Presto and Uni alone. So...net win? As has been previously logged, Orcs are 10XP each, so 160XP total. Not sure how Presto’s gonna get past the Stegosaurus...maybe it ate the Orcs and left?

And what of the rest of the party? They appear in a clearing (what is it with this DM and splitting the party?) Surprisingly, Eric is the first to realize Presto is missing (not surprisingly, he does so after insulting Presto) and Bobby realizes Uni’s gone too.

Then the party realizes something ferocious and/or hungry is heading their way (is the Stegaraurus looking for another snack?) so they run...into some sort of clear barrier...

On that note, let’s check in with Presto (ERIC: WHAT?! HANK: Calm down. You know the DM loves drama...) The cave mouth is clear, (so maybe the Stegosaurus really did eat the Orcs) so Presto and Uni exit. At that time, Dungeon Master appears and tells Presto that his spell teleported the party to a “far off land” where they’re facing “great danger” (So...pretty much anywhere in the realm?) and the in order to help them he must “climb to new heights of courage” and he must “meet three strangers and lose something very important to him” (so...his virginity? I mean, look at him! Unless he was in Band Camp, there’s no way he’s gotten laid) Then, of course, Dungeon Master pulls his vanishing act.

Back to the party, they face a rather familiar monster...

...and I still have no clue what the hell it is.

Diana comments that the barrier is like glass, so Bobby gets the bright idea to smash it with his club. Miraculously, this works and the party escapes the whatever-that-is yet again so I don’t have to figure out how to assign XP. The party then takes a look at their new surroundings. They are on a table inside a room where everything is at least ten times larger than it should be. Then it all makes sense when they meet the owner of the room (and I’m sure the building it’s attached to)...

...so now the DM is ripping off Jack and the Beanstalk? Well, if they encounter the magic goose then at least they won’t have to worry about paying for provisions...

The giant (let’s call him a Storm Giant, as they’re the largest variety, unless I see otherwise) grabs the party. Eric immediately starts throwing insults, which causes the Giant to want to give him a lesson in manners. Hank manages to get a shot off, which misses by a mile (which is impressive, given this guy is probably a mile high) The giant accuses the party of trying to steal his golden egg (I KNEW IT!) He then introduces the party to Willy, his pet Slime Beast

So THAT’S what it is! A Slime Beast! Ummm...so what the fuck is a Slime Beast?

The Giant proposes a game of Hide & Eat (if Willy finds them, he eats them!) The party runs and slides under the crack in a door that Willy can’t get through.

Meanwhile, Presto and Uni wander into a town (only the second we’ve seen in the entire campaign so far) Presto is looking for the three strangers, but to no avail. For whatever reason, Uni wanders into a tavern (this feels like the setup for a joke) and gets grabbed by a three-headed Ogre

[FUN FACT: In the 80s, Ral Partha Miniatures actually made a 3 Headed Ogre figure. However, it doesn’t look anything like the Ogre in the tavern...

(Thanks to Reaper Miniatures)

...probably because the production company didn’t wanna be sued by the estate of the Stooges]

The Ogre wants to trade three “magic marbles” for Uni. Presto refuses (probably because Bobby would kill him if he did), so the Ogre “insists” they play the “skull game” (really just the shell game with skulls), which goes as you’d expect...

(Thanks to Doc Dixon)

...but at least the Ogre gave him the marbles as a consolation prize.

Later, Presto is feeling sorry for himself (for good reason) and throws away the marbles. They sink into the ground and a beanstalk petrified tree shoots out of the ground and grows into the sky. Conveniently, there appears to be a staircase at the base...

“I guess that’s what Dungeon Master meant by ‘climb to new heights of courage’...“

Presto refuses to enter the tree...until Uni appears, followed by Larry, Moe, and Curly! As the pair retreat into the tree, the door slams shut.

After climbing the stairs for an indeterminate amount of time, Presto thinks he should turn back, but the tree has other ideas...

Presto takes the hint and continues climbing with Uni.

Meanwhile, at the Giant’s castle, (because of course it’s a castle) the party is hiding inside a broom. Eric gloats about his hiding skills, only to spy Willy on the handle of the broom, lying in wait. Hank leads the party to climb to a nearby window, but Willy swoops in and grabs Bobby! Diana tosses her staff at Willy, making him drop Bobby. Hank then fires a bolt at a nearby mop bucket, making it slide under Bobby so he doesn’t become a Barbarian Pancake on the floor below. He then fires a second bolt that catches Bobby’s club, carrying him up to the windowsill.

But Willy isn’t so easily thwarted as he tries to swoop in for another grab, but Diana throws her staff again, knocking the shade off of a nearby wall lamp. It falls on Willy, then to the floor, trapping him. Fuck, now I gotta figure out XP for a monster that doesn’t exist in any D&D book! I’m gonna say...*consulting DMG for what I know about Willy...give him enough strength to be a challenge to a party of adventurers that average level 6...4 attacks (because 4 arms)...* 1350XP

Eric breathes a sigh of relief, until...

The Giant challenges the party to a fight. The guy really should pick on someone his own size (or at least a group that could be his size if they stood on each others’ shoulders) Actually, he just threatens to.

He then notes that a golden egg has been laid and sends Willy to get it. He then decides to use the party to play Rock ‘em Sock ‘em Dragons.

Bobby has enough of the Giant’s antics and smashes the game. The party then runs, but not before Hank fires a bolt that tears a nearby curtain, making it fall on the Giant’s head. The Giant gives chase once he’s able to see again (you’d think it would be a short chase, but...)

Meanwhile, Presto and Uni are still climbing the stairs. Presto then hears a cry of anguish, he runs to a nearby window (in a tree?) and sees...

...a baby dragon holding on for dear life. Judging by the color, I’m gonna say either a Brass or Copper Dragon (it may make a difference if combat occurs) Presto comes out to help the baby, but slips and barely catches himself on the branch. Uni then rushes out and grabs Presto’s hat, whipping up a flying carpet (maybe she should be the party wizard) that floats them safely inside. Everyone is happy, until...

...Mama shows up, and she looks pissed that her precious Junior would soil itself with a filthy human! Presto tries to get Junior to go to Mama, but Junior doesn’t wanna go. Finally, Presto tosses Junior to Mama and high-tails it out of there, but not before Mama gets in a parting shot (of flame. Given Copper and Brass Dragons breathe gas, I guess it wasn’t either...but what kind was it? Why does the DM have to keep making up monsters?)

Finally, Presto and Uni reach the top of the tree, (where there’s yet another door) followed closely by Mama. Just as Presto’s about to become Dragon Chow...

...Willy shows up and steals an egg from Mama’s nest (”golden” egg? Hang on...*flip flip* Oh, it’s a GOLD Dragon!) Suddenly, Presto isn’t so interesting. Presto spies the castle, then hears the familiar girlish scream of Eric. He realizes the others are in trouble (so what else is new?) and runs in.

Speaking of the screamer, he and the rest of the party are still somehow outrunning the Giant (my guess would be they keep doubling back and through his legs and he can’t quickly turn around) Then Willy shows up with the egg, so the Giant gives him the party as a treat (and the game of hide and eat begins anew)

And this is where Presto rejoins the party (well, is in the same area, anyway) Presto tries his magic and somehow conjures a cage that captures Willy for another 1350XP (this time with Presto involved)

We have a happy reunion until the Giant shows up again. They start heading fior the exit, but then Presto remembers the Giant has Mama’s egg. Fortunately, the Giant has his hand low enough for Presto to grab it and off they run (with Eric holding the egg. Who wants to bet Mama’s gonna be pissed at Eric?) Unfortunately, the egg hatches. Now Eric needs to carry a baby Gold Dragon.

The party runs out of the castle and into the tree. Naturally the Giant climbs down the tree after them ($5 says Bobby chops it down with his club...which means I’ll need to figure out how many XP a Storm Giant is worth)

Aaaaaaaand then Mama shows up.

Mama immediately snatches up Baby and Eric, but instead of completely obliterating Eric...

...He’s her hero! (much to Eric’s chagrin)

Suddenly, Hank remembers they have a Giant chasing them (who must be the slowest Giant ever and he still hasn’t caught up with them, despite the fact that they’re running in a slope around the inside and he’s going straight down) and start running again, accompanied by Mama, Junior, and Baby.

When they reach the bottom, the door is still closed, so Bobby makes his own door. And here comes the Giant. Presto decides to try magic again. Given the Law of Averages, this shouldn’t end well. However, he manages to get a spell off that destroys the tree and makes the Giant vanish. So a Storm Giant is worth...*flip flip* 8450XP

Mama and family make a nest in the remains of the tree and Mama wants to adopt Eric as a pet

(I hope he’s nestbroken)

The party receives 9960XP, or 1660 Each. That would be Presto’s share, as the rest receive an additional 1350XP, or 270XP each for a total of 1930XP, which is not enough for anyone to level up

[edelwary]

when you were first getting into art, what and how did you draw? (like did you just doodle ur masterpieces on pieces of paper and posted-notes or did you have a proper sketchbook) how did you find motivation? bc ive been trying to draw but I always get unmotivated and stop while still wanting to get better just by doing nothing.

REALLY LONG, LOTS OF ADVICES FOR ARTISTS : 

TL;DR ; skip to the HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW part bc i have a megaton of shit to say lol + The MOTIVATION part 

mmh… I’ll get into details with this one tbh bc it’s a long ass process ahah : 

I live by the sea ; when i was youung i used to draw TONS of boat, but like, dollhouse boats, you could see the insides and stuff ; i loved to add tiny details and stuff, and imbricate everything together !

around 8 or 9 yo, i went to the public library with school and discovered the wonderful world of mangas ! I basically… Copy pasted an entire Mermaid Melody tome x) 

For about 2 years i alternated between reading mangas and trying to copy them ! Then i just kept drawing in the margins of my schoolwork for about… 5 years ! I have a Fuck Ton of sketchbooks of that time, it was… The start. Lol. Never say it’s bad because it’s never bad, just not there yet !!

Around my 13 yo, i went every saturday, for two years, under a bookstore ; there was a cave, and drawing classes ; that teacher was mean and harsh and stuff, but like… Not really. He would take away my eraser for the class, force me to use pencil, to draw something else (bulky boys instead of magical girls). 

I’ve learned a lot, more in terms of How To LEARN to draw than to draw itself, but i still progressed a LOT !! 

Then i kept drawing by myself for a year and i really worked hard on it ; about hours a day, trying watercolors and stuff ; i have a real problem with colors in traditionnal art, but i’m much better with lines (i should scan some RAD stuff i made in the weekend, yall ive never done anything this good i stg i dont know why i always forget im so much better on paper) 

This gets us to my sweet 16 ; i have to year of advance, bc i got ‘’’promoted’’’ idk how to say it ; anyways, i entered my (current) animation school for the first year at 16; vERY IMPRESSIVE AND TERRIFYING. 

And i learned. A fuckmegaton. Of shit there. 

Now i’m going for my third year there and i can make photorealistic marmora blades and cyberkpunk decors if i want to and that’s rad, but here is

 HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW : 

I have one HYPER important advice, and i’m keeping it to heart since i’m like, 11 : Have. Sketchbooks. Please !!! It’s very important. Here’s why : 

You keep everything with you in one place. You have 1 sketchbook, it’s basically easy to take every where (a A5, or A4 are pretty easy to carry, i have like, 12 of those, and around 8 of A3) 

You keep track of what you’ve done. It’s super important, bc first you can cry of laughter at your old stuff bc its cute but not so good, and second, you can just be like ‘holy mama’ and see how much you’ve improved

It’s very important to be organized. I WORK in art, and trust me, if there’s something that i’ve learned this year through tears and missing files and bugs : Be. Impeccable. Now if it’s for fun, go a little loose, and just have a folder for art on your computer, and a sketchbook, no need to stress, but the better you try to keep a record of where is what, the better you’ll see whats wrong

Notebooks are friends !! You can draw, write, glue stuff, make notes, lists, everything !!! I have my life in those. It’s more important to me than any of my phones. 

Be proud of it. Like, not everything, duh ! But try to tell yourself than it’s like a RPG ; even if it’s only 2 xp here and there, one day you’ll beat level 40, and that’s super important : art is. Fuckin. Long.

I cant stress it enough. It’s soooo long !!! SO LONG !! it’s years. It’s like karate and fishing and ANYTHING. To be good at it, it takes time, but it WILL COME if you keep trying. There’s no secret passage. 

You’re gonna me it, believe in me who believes in you. 

Use. References. 

Coming from a little shit who’s got a really good visual memory, that can sound like bs, but i stg everything is always AT LEAST twice as good if you’ve used a visual support. 

I’m not saying COPY EVRYTHING (even though thats a good training) I’m saying, if you really want to do that asian tiger, please have at least two or three pictures of it nearby. Take photos of your hands, and stuff ! 

Make it harder. 

No eraser. 

Paint. 

I draw all my backgrounds on my sketchbook with INDIAN INK; no returns, no refunds. 

Ink, Ink, INK !! Don’t allow mistakes.

And if you make mistakes :

New page, restart

It’s okay

It’s for you

I once started back again a whole EXAM bc it was bad, i got one of my best grades 

You’ll improve and be more assured if you know you just have to DO IT. Trust me. It’s VISIBLE; if you can erase, you fidget and hesitate and ‘’kbeujebez hahhaaa idkkidsd’’ ; stop ; do it, and if you don’t like it ? Try again, there’s no time limit

Draw as large as you can 

There’s no interesting story here, it just helps. Bigger movement of the hand, more place for details, breathing lines

Thin lineart helps

Thinner. Make it even thinner

Break the rules, but not the ones that structure your art 

Big lineart ? Why not

Unfinished lines, vaporeous colors ? Pretty

Cubism is actually based on extensive and intense practice of classical art, it’s not wibbly wooblly ; the anatomy is more correct than you think 

Structure and composition are important, but so is movement and life ; choose your fighter ; mine is fluidity and fun, i’m like, a rogue/archer in drawing. Some people are dwarf fighter. That’s amazing and great. 

Don’t be afraid to do nothing

Pages and pages of my sketchbooks are actually just lance facing right and smiling, you know… 

Sometimes it just doesnt work : two ways :

Take a break, Kiki’s delivery service style

Keep trying, break your art until it obeys and comes back

Take breaks. Breath. 

Don’t compare. I do it, it doesn’t help at all. You’ll make it ; and if you compare, keep in mind that everyone’s different

I’m not gonna lie, it’s NOT easy, it’s even hard 

But I really, really think it’s worth it 

MOTIVATION :

My main bitch 

I’m always pumped for art because i can LITTERALLY NOT do anything else ; i love reading and writing and stuff but at the end of the day i just want !!! to draw !!!! aaaaaa-

Fall in love with it, and with the possibilities ; i have stories to tell, tell me yours ! Do your best, one day it WILL work

Actual advices : 

I have an inspiration blog where i just reblogs stuff i like to draw them later

Find a picture, copy it. Do it again. Change the characters (i have 2 ocs and Lance and Keith as default characters) in the pic. 

Like an artstyle ? Break it to its very core, analyse it, copy it, redo it, trace it and ABSORB it. Don’t copy/past, LEARN from your heroes.

Do what you like. I have 86578 pieces of voltron, this is not a coincidence. I have ENDLESS ideas for this show, wtf. 

Try new things. Buy indian ink im begging you. It’s so cool. 

Have a game with yourself, or a challenge. STICK TO IT. 

Study. When you’re bored, usually it’s because you’re stagnating. Make it harder or do hands until you cry. 

Love your backgrounds; make backgrounds, study trees, and tokyo streets, and venice’s bridges. Decor is just as cool as characters, if not more

Mess a little with everything. My roomate more than one found me stained from head to toes trying to DO STUFF 

Draw outfits. Draw what you want but can’t afford 

MAKE YOUR LIFE A COMIC. Remember those sketchbooks ? Make a comic a week/month/every full moon, whatever, and draw your life (mine’s the roomates au lol) 

Prompts blogs are cool too 

Make fanart of a fic you liked ; you have the characters and the pose already, you just have to illustrate ; double bonus, you probably will make a writer’s day, if not year !

That little movie that plays when you listen to your favorite song ? DRAW IT

Your favorite scene in your favorite movie ? Redraw each shot. On post it. Plus it looks awesome afterwards to have the infamous TREX scene of Jurassic Parks in post it

Get bored. That’s inevitable. Dance, scream, get back to it. Walk, draw everything you see. 

Make a paper google map street view : Take a walk : every 50 meters, draw what is in front of you. 

Snapchats your friends. Draw their snapchats when they answer 

Draw maps. Invent places. Invent bikes, and hovercrafts, and monsters. Make your everyday inventory. Make your life a video game, and do the concept arts of it. 

FETCH your inspiration. I have approx. 20 artbooks, full of drawings and concept arts of my fave movies/games ; take what you like and add it to the story you have since you’re 8. We all have one. 

Ask for it ; your sis, your mom, me even ! If you dont have ideas, someone will have them. 

WELL i’m gonna stop there, even though i got like, 9864567 more to say, but with this you should be fine ! Anon, i’m rooting for you ! we all start somewhere, just hold on!!!! 

[home-working]

Let There Be Sunlight

Holy shit it’s 2019! What did you get up to in 2018? What were your achievements, your successes? (Tumblr, I see that you have quasi-upgraded your blogging platform so I can have proper post titles AND photo layouts, congrats! Except they don’t really work!!)

One thing I did was upgrade my workspace, cause holy fuck it was starting to get depressing having my desk in a dark corner.

Welcome to Homeworking HQ (Ditmas Park) 2.0! Now I get to push pixels beside my big, bright, plant-adorned window, which allows me to bathe in all the reflected sunlight I can take and more easily spy on the people across the street at all hours of the day. In addition to relocating my desk, I got rid of another shitty table I didn’t like/need and replaced it with something useful: colour-coordinated S-T-O-R-A-G-E!

Behold!

Since apparently I don’t know how to purchase anything that isn’t red, yellow or blue, I found this not-Bisley™ wheeled filing cabinet online and then filled it with shit to organize other-shit-that-was-cluttering-up-my-apartment. There is nothing quite as satisfying as hidden things unnecessarily matching other things that are also hidden!

The only other surface I now have to eat off/do anything at is this IKEA “kitchen island” which I mostly end up standing at if I have a guest over like some awkward personal bartender because I currently only have one tall stool:

December: back on the holiday caramel-making bullshit.

Anyways, so far, it’s been a success sitting 10 feet closer to a natural light source, measurable by the fact that I really actually enjoy sitting at my desk again.

Wow, I’m sitting beside a window! Ok!

But how else does one define success? Purchasing objects to improve your quality of life is one thing, but measuring success in your career and personal life is trickier.

Warning: the rest of this post is basically me practicing long winded/unfunny/unresearched existential thought diarrhea so feel free to maybe skip it!

When I was younger and still unsure of what direction my life would take post-art school, I knew that at least no matter what I ended up doing, I wanted to be successful at it, and loosely defined that “success” as being able to make a living from it (growing up in a financially unstable household, self-sustained monetary security was of high importance). I was very lucky that I fell into a creative line of work that I not only found enjoyable and challenging, but was able to turn into a relatively fruitful career.

But the thing with a low threshold of success is that as soon as you achieve it, you need to begin rescaling your definition of it to keep moving forward: you need to embrace AMBITION.

O, ambition! What highs! I remember in my late 20s working a full-time advertising job then coming home and joyfully working a number of assorted freelance jobs. I loved it! (My then-boyfriend hated it!) I was productive! I was building a portfolio! The future! and! amount! of! work! was! limitless!

But now I’m TIRED. Thinking about work makes me TIRED. Just seeing my phone display “January” made me TIRED. Last year when I had a temporary full-time gig, with a 1.5-hour daily commute, I got home and ate take-out sushi with 13 seasons of Grey’s Anatomy and ignored my freelance work and fell the fuck ASLEEP.

And still, despite a lack of energy (vitamin B and heme iron be damned), I feel guilty every minute of the day before 10pm that I’m not working on something. Even if all my client jobs are complete, I still feel like I should be taking advantage of that rare “free time” and work on a personal project (this post itself is a direct result of the joy/guilt from staying in on New Year’s Eve).

There’s the concept of a healthy work/life balance, but who has time for that? No minute can ever be wasted, because ambition is always perched on your shoulder whispering: you need to produce MORE THINGS; you need to work HERE, or teach THERE; you need to be on THIS WEBSITE, or THIS LIST, or in THIS GALLERY, or work with THIS STUDIO, and have THIS TITLE, or give THIS TALK… or you’re not really achieving success. Even if to outside eyes it might look like you’re doing pretty damn good, when you measure yourself next to your industry peers, you’re ultimately a smidgen above average, at best.

What’s sadly comforting is that achievement insecurity pervades almost everyone. A friend that I consider to be extremely successful (owning companies, property) once confided that their own family doesn’t see their achievements to be very worthwhile. Another friend, who puts so much work into running their own small business, is realizing the energy they’re pouring in is not resulting in a sustainable existence. Yet another friend, who seemed to have achieved the whole perfect job/house/marriage/dog combo, felt inadequate for having trouble conceiving.

So what if you’re not reaching the level of success you think you should have by now? Does yearning for more keep you moving forward, or just make you feel shitty? When do you abandon ambition? As my friend Amil Niazi recently commented on the Sheryl Sandberg concept of “leaning in”, when can we just give up and “lean out”?

What I’m realising is that what possibly makes the idea of abandoning success so difficult is that I, a single woman, don’t know what I’d replace it with. As 20-somethings unburdened with families to raise or households to maintain as earlier generations were, we were instead burdened by the freedom and expectation to become who we wanted as early as we could. And if we millennial women are not trying to live our most ambitiously fulfilling lives [on social media], do we even have an identity?!

If a woman chooses to forego ambition, there seems to be only one acceptable reason for that: motherhood. (She can have it all as well, but god forbid she have neither!) But I’m not sure I want that either, and so giving up success without starting a family means I will have to decide if I not only want to let myself but also society-at-large down.

Your 30s (ironically the decade that I’ve decided is about learning to not give a shit) seems to be the ultimate reality check; either you’ve already “made it”, or you need to embrace that you haven’t, probably aren’t going to, and are too damn tired to keep trying. Do we just need to give ourselves a break at this point? Re-evaluate our definition of success yet again, instead of abandoning it altogether? Maybe the better question is WHY I feel the need to measure my own success in the first place, when everyone’s definition is different anyways... someone’s definition might be having a baby and a white picket fence; mine should be managing to survive in New York without health insurance while self-employed.

Me, exemplifying the self-satisfaction that comes with writing about yourself on social media while simultaneously exhibiting how my apartment has been reorganized.

I was recently told by an older friend that your 40s is about learning to love yourself. So I guess I’ve got 4 more years of trying to “make it” before I can officially give up and force myself to be happy with (or at least acknowledge) what I’ve achieved thus far, and worry about nothing more. Looking forward to that menial office job and craft room in the sky!

Colophon sweater & socks: UNIQLO; toque: Army & Navy; sweatpants: Alternative Apparel; mug: some print-on-demand company; glasses: Steven Alan clearance; plants: IKEA & Home Depot; couchy thing & kitchen island: IKEA; stool: Target; status candle: Diptyque; filing cabinet: Walmart.com; wall poster: Grilli Type; everything nice: probably MoMA Design Store deep discount; caramel recipe: David Lebovitz; optional subtitle: “Or, How I Never Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Hustle”; most horrifying thing I remember from a dream last night: Kylie Jenner; most stupefying thing to waste time image searching: Kylie Jenner’s teenage face transformation; best thing to snog as the clock strikes midnight when home alone on NYE: duty-free booze

[berriestart--lilacsweet]

Once Bitten, Twice Shy Part 1.5

NEW CHAPTER!  

Regis and Evangeline get to know one another better as they travel. Eva reveals details about her past and how she longs for a family. Regis comforts her after she become bitter and takes her anger out on him. Adorable fluff and bonding.

AN: This take place while Regis and Eva are on the road. An inbetween bit. Instead of messying up what I already have posted by rearranging things I'll just put this here and it can serve as a flashback I guess. Anyways hope you all enjoy! I had alot of fun writing this one.

BY FIRELIGHT AND STARLIGHT

PART: 1.5

Evangeline and Regis rode hard and traveled fast, only stopping long enough to eat and get a few hours rest when need be. Every night, as more time past, they became better acquainted with one another. Regis spent a majority of the time finding various herbs and flowers then passed the night time hours sketching their likeness into a leather-bound journal. To pass the time during the day they would quiz one another on the medicinal properties of various plants. Occasionally, Evangeline would surprise Regis with unique uses of certain herbs or mushrooms and what roles they played in Witcher decoctions, potions and oils.

He sketched most evenings by the fire; twirling stems, leaves, and petals in his slender fingers. His renditions were impeccable; the empty space around his drawings were slowly, over time, filled in with his delicate scrawl.  

His herbaria included specimens of phytology (flora), mycology (Fungi), and phycology (Algae). He was particularly interested in ethnobotany (the study of flora and their individual uses according to the region’s people). His herbarium was divided into sections using standard taxonomy with binomial nomenclature (a standard system of identifying species of living things using two-part Latin names). He studied every specimen’s preferred ecology, and their anatomy; dutifully dissecting everything and drawing its likeness on the smooth paper in his book.  

Regis was very thorough with his work; ensuring that every page was legible and every spare section of space used as to what could aesthetically be allowed. The leather-bound journal was large; over three inches deep by sixteen inches tall and eleven inches wide. It took up the entirety of his lap while he worked.

One night in particular they were sitting around their campfire when Regis beckoned the Witcheress over.

“Tell me what you think.”

“About what?”  

“Come, come.” he motioned for her to take a seat beside him. He had his legs splayed out before him and his back to a moss-covered log. She gave him a puzzled look, hesitant to sit so close to the mysterious, yet interesting and attractive stranger. “I’d like you to look over these last few entries to ensure I haven't forgotten or omitted anything.”  

She nodded slowly, still contemplating whether or not she wanted to sit so near to him.  

“I don’t bite.” he jest, sensing her hesitation. She rolled her eyes and took a seat beside him. He let his arm rest behind her on the log and handed her the journal with his other hand. She settled the book into her lap and thumbed through its pages, lightly running her fingertips over the graphite lines.  

“These are beautiful. You’re a talented artist, Regis.” she mumbled as she continued to look over his work.  

He chuckled lightly. “Thank you. It’s... taken me a very long time to get his far.”  

“I couldn’t draw like this to save my life. But...” she ran her fingers over a drawing of a bleeding heart. “I used to paint watercolors... a very long time ago.”  

“Really now? Since when are witchers taught the fine arts?” he asked genuinely surprised.  

“... Before... I became a witcher... I was the daughter of a merchant. My father was rather wealthy; I was taught many things befit a proper lady... like painting.” Evangeline sighed, moving on to another drawing in his book.

“You were a merchant’s daughter, I never would have guessed that. What... If I may ask, happened for you to want to become a witcher?”

“That... is a very long story.” she sighed leaning back against the fallen tree with him.

“I don’t' have any place to be.” he shrugged.

She sighed and glanced up at him. He gave her a soft smile of encouragement; something she was discovering was very endearing about him. “Well, this story begins a long time ago, longer than I care to admit, actually.” she sighed again. “When I was sixteen my mother passed away. My father had a hard time coping with her death. So, we decided to travel for a while; go to some distant lands and bring back wonderous things to sell. So, we did, only on our return journey our caravan contracted a mysterious illness. One by one our party fell ill and died... My father and I were the only ones to survive. We were traveling thought the upper range of the blue mountains... Winter came early that year. We wandered thought the wilderness for weeks, abandoning our possessions and treasures along the way.  Meanwhile, my father contracted the illness... Finally, we came across a small path. It was hard to track but I managed it somehow; it led to the Witcher keep, Kaer Morhen.”

She sighed again and brushed hair from her face. She felt his gaze on her, so she avoided him staring down at the pages of his herberia instead of making eye contact.

“That's when I met the Witchers: Geralt and Vesemir; I'm sure you’ve heard tale of them. They were kind enough to help me with my father... They convinced the others to take us in. My father got worse though, there was nothing to do. He didn’t last the first week... I was alone, the only woman in a strong hold of about a hundred men. The elders wanted to toss me out, but Vesemir convinced them to let me stay until spring when they could escort me to Novigrad. So, I pitched in to earn my keep; cooked cleaned, did the laundry... It kept me busy but... I couldn’t resist the library.” she smiled at the memory. “I read a lot. Vesemir brought me new books often. I kept to myself, but still managed to draw the attention of some...” she sighed and shrugged. She felt Regis’ eyes boring into her, she grimaced and kept ignoring him, not wanting him to see her face as she spoke the rest of her tale.

“He tried to force himself on me, luckily for me though, Geralt was paying attention as well. He saved me. And offered to teach me how to defend myself. The next few months I learned all I could. I trained with Geralt as often as we could.” She chuckled before continuing. “He said I had a natural aptitude...” she swallowed hard before recommencing her story. “And he taught me fighting techniques only witchers use. One day, while training by the lake, we were attacked by a kraken. I... My body was broken.” She looked down at the palms of her hands and flexed them as she sighed. “Luckily, again, we were being watched. Vesemir and some of the trainees counter attacked and Geralt swam out and killed the creature; a few were injured in the battle, but … I was dying. Geralt and Vesemir decided they would put me through the trials of the grasses in an attempt to save my life. The Elders refused, but somehow Geralt convinced them, he’s rather good at that I suppose.” she laughed with a crooked grin. “He told them it’s what I would have wanted and they gave in. Surprisingly it worked. I lived, it affected me slightly different that the others.” she twirled her hair in her fingers as she spoke. “And... that's how I became... this.” she shrugged with a sigh.

Regis wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her to him. “I had no idea you’d been through so much, Dear. You’re certainly the strongest woman I've her had the pleasure to have known... Thank you for sharing your life with me. I... I’ve a newfound respect for you.”  

She shook her head against his chest. “Doesn’t change anything. Still me.”

“Well, yes, but most people couldn’t even imagine going thought what you have. Let alone live through it. And, well, you’re one of the most famous witchers of our time. I’d day you adapted well.”

“I had to... I’ll admit it was hard at first... I had issues accepting the changes to my body... and lifestyle, but I was thankful to even be alive... I had to be.”  

Regis nodded and continued to hold her, running his hand through her hair. She let him. It was nice to have someone who wanted to listen to her; someone who held her as though they cared.  

“I think the hardest thing... Is growing older and knowing what all I missed out on... A family... Never being able to bare a child still hurts... Even after all the training and mutations... It's still a base instinct, want, need for a woman... Something that even witcher life couldn’t take away.”

He kissed the top of her head. “I know it's not the same... But you could always settle down and adopt. There's plenty of orphans in need of loving families after the war.”

Evangeline shook her head and sat upright. “Who would want a barren wife? Let alone a monster slayer... a murderer... for a wife?” she scoffed. “No, that'll never happen.” she muttered trying to stand up only to be pulled back down by Regis.  

“You might be surprised by what some men want, what some are open to, what some are willing understand and look past...” he said gazing into her eyes.

“Or men who feign those emotions and intentions only to use me as their mistress, because I can’t bare a child. I’ve been down that path before. I’m done trying to be normal Regis. Witchers aren’t meant to have families.” she said a bit harsher than she meant, pushing him away and rising to her feet.  

“That’s not true. Geralt has his family, surely you’ve heard of Ciri and Yennifer.”

She paused a moment. “Yes, I’ve heard of Geralt’s love of the sorceress Yennifer and their adoptive daughter, Crillia. Geralt’s situation is... unique. Beside women find witchers attractive; they’re mysterious and women can’t become pregnant from them. It’s the exact opposite of my situation. Men fear me. They fear those stronger than themselves, while most women welcome witchers to their beds... I’ve yet to find a man with similar intentions, normally they shun me, run me out as soon as the job’s done.”

“I assure you-”

“I don’t want to talk about it anymore, Regis. I shouldn’t have said anything to begin with.” she growled sliding into her bedroll, her back to him. “This is why I don’t keep company.”  

“But Eva-”

“Just drop it, Regis. Go to sleep, we still have a long journey ahead.” she sighed, angry with him for pressing the topic and angry with herself for even opening up to him.  

“You can go on to sleep...” he said flatly. “I’m going for a stroll. You’re welcome to join me if you wish.” he stated as he walked away into the woods. Evangeline grunted and pulled the blanket up further around her shoulders.  

“Suit yourself.” she grumbled. He shook his head and ran a hand though the hair at the base of his neck.

“Why do witchers have to be so damn stubborn?” he thought out loud as he disappeared into the darkness of the forest.  Eva tossed and turned cursing herself for opening up to him, then for being so harsh with him. She ground her teeth. The cold earth beneath her penetrated her body as she forced herself to lay there trying her best to calm herself. She adjusted herself, moving some missed twigs out from under her and settled back down. Some time went by as she waited for his return, internally hoping he would come back sooner rather than later, hoping that he wouldn’t stay cross with her.  

“Damnit.” she muttered climbing out of her bedroll. “I won't be able to sleep until I apologize to him. She muttered as she grabbed her swords and followed his tracks into the woods. She traveled about half a mile before she spotted him in a small clearing. He sat on a large tree trunk looking up into the night sky.  

“I wondered how long it would take you.” he said not taking his eyes off the starry sky. He motioned for her to sit beside him. She smiled slightly and sighed before taking the vacant space beside him. “Sometimes I forget how lovely my surroundings can be. It’s beneficial to get a new perspective at times.”  

Evangeline nodded and gazed up at the stars with her companion. The sky was pitch black but littered with millions of little white, blue and red tinted specks. She didn’t remember the last time she had stopped to take in the beauty of the constellations. She felt at ease beside him; her anger having subsided she accepted the simple happiness of just sharing this experience with him.

“Eva... I’m quite sorry for earlier. I didn't mean to upset you.”  he muttered, turning to face her, breaking the silence between them.

She shook her head. “You have nothing to apologize for Regis. I’m the one who should be asking for your forgiveness. I over reacted.”  

He smiled softly down at her and wrapped his arm around her pulling her to his side again. “I shouldn’t have pushed the subject. I... I understand why you feel how you do... I’m not exactly welcome by most people either. It took you a while to warm up to me as well.”

“I’m sorry Regis. I’ve been an inconsiderate ass.” she said pulling away to look him in the eye as she apologized.

“I think we both are equally guilty. Call it even?” he asked. She nodded her head and allowed him to pull her to his chest again. She closed her eyes and savored the moment. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had been so kind to her. They sat there in silence simply enjoying one another’s company. Slowly he slipped his hand down to rest on her hip, she welcomed it.

“Regis?”

“Hmm?” he hummed lazily as his head rested atop hers.  

“Do you... Nevermind.”

“No, do I what?” he asked pulling back to look her in the face.

“I... I don’t know... Am I...” she shook her head and looked away suddenly afraid to ask her question; afraid of what his answer might be.

“I see.” he sighed pulling her back to him. He kissed the top of her head. “You don’t scare me.” he chuckled. “I think you're perfect the way you are. Don’t let any man make you feel otherwise.”

She closed her eyes and nodded. She took in his herby scent and hugged him. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it Dear.” he mumbled into her hair, as he ran his fingers through her long locks. They sat there in one another's arms for what felt like an eternity to Evangeline. She didn’t want to move from him, she wanted to stay wrapped in his strong arms entranced by his delightful scent until she fell asleep.  

“Come on.” he sighed stretching his arms above his head. “We’d best get a little sleep.” he said pulling her to her feet and walking back towards their camp. “Thank you for being open with me, about your life.” he said slipping his arm around her waist with a smirk and resting his head against hers. “Perhaps tomorrow I’ll tell you more about myself...”

“I’d like that.” she replied with a smile. Turning her face up to his. He caressed her cheek with his fingertips as he tucked her hair behind her ear.  

“I would as well.” He leaned forward and kissed her gently on the cheek. “Goodnight Eva. Get some rest.”

[tenecity]

from haters to lovers; zhu zhengting

from haters to lovers—a series where nine percent and you have the cliche, typical love story

warning: mentions of gender discrimnation

sosososososososo after much procrastination, crying and cracking my head, i finally got someth to possibly hate abt zzt hell yes god

also! taking into consideration tt china is still a v much conservative society, gender discrimnation is everywhere and rlly, as of yet, cant b helped

so which is why, imagine ure a chinese woman you found it weird, almost distasteful that a boy would be in yr dance class

i mean, guys are suppose to be strong people, doing more physical stuff like wushu or smth, and then there’s this boy here, doing pointe and perfect turns

“zhu zhengting is here!!!! oml doesn’t he look like a fairy?” your best friend tugs your sleeve as she discreetly point to the said boy. you roll your eyes. youre tired of this whole rave about him. literally, the entire class fangirls abt him; and apparently, it is not just for his looks, for also for his dance

spsjssjnsnsbs hE IS SO ELEGANT

you wld nvr admit it, but ok i guess ure borderline jealous.

i mean, his lines r clean, force controlled in his movements, perfect timing for rushed movements and then he slows down with such grace that you will never have 

but its still irks you, that a boy should dance so softly and gracefully. doesn’t seem to sit well with your traditional thinking 

so anyway, sidenote! you suck at turns wowww so coincidental

and every lesson, you usually would stay back just to practice it and you always end up with bruises and what nots as you fall repeatedly, no one there to catch you when you fall 

somehow, zhengting stays back today as well, rehearsing his main role in the upcoming performance, “swan lake” 

and you can’t keep your eyes off his figure 

it is mesmerising, how he can convey emotions, feelings, an entire story, through mere movements of the arms and legs. you observe how his every move is calculated, strength justttt the right amount that it looks elegant instead of overly powerful. 

and then you stare at the mirror and you sigh. probably why you only got a minor role in the performance. 

shaking your head, trying to push all those nonsensical thoughts out of your brain, you continue trying to turn, but you just can’t find the balance

yixing: balance baLanCe bALANCE

once again, your arms aren’t fully stretched out and it creates an imbalance, causing you to once again, fall backwards, out of turn 

you shut your eyes, bracing yourself for the impact

but it doesn’t come 

surprise surprise

eyelids fluttering open slowly, you realise just how close your are to zhengting, his ragged breath from his exhausting rehearsal fan across your face, inevitably making them the colour of cherries.

“you ok?” he softly asks, as he lowers you down.

“...yea im fine.” you mumble, head bowed.

“....do you need help with the turns?” 

“....”

“you know, you’re almost there. its just the part at the 180 degree mark, where you have to pull in your hands. your arms don’t always cross, or are pulled in too fast, which breaks your flow and speed and causes you to fall out of turn.” 

how does he know? bc he has been looking at you, dumbass

also i hve no idea how accurate this is i suck at body anatomy

you nod slowly. he makes sense. and its true, you always fall when you are just about to spin to the opposite side.

getting up, your arms are poised, ready to try again. 

andddd they become frigid as hands land on your middle, firm and supportive.

“look, its not even straight here. you need it to be 90 degrees here, before you can even start turning.” he adjusts you accordingly.

“im going to spin you slowly, and we try to perfect each section, ok?” 

he spins you slowly, your arms closing in in slow motion. he corrects you at certain parts, one hand leaving your waist as he repositions yr arm.

and now, ure facing him, head bowed as a flush colours your cheeks when u realise how close the two of u r. a slight movement will just allow yr lips to brush against his.

but of course his hand is steady as hell and he just turns you slowly and you face the other direction

which, makes ur stomach churn and disappointment flows thru u????

so skipskip next scene

its after class and ure packing up when u hear some commotion at the corridor

n u follow ur busybody classmates

u can barely see who is shouting bc u a cute shortie :)

but u recognise the voice

"NO i'm staying dad. this is what i want to do."

"No, no, no. teacher, im v sorry, but i will like to pull my son out of this dance class now. i will pay the rest of the fees, but he will not be performing that stupid recital-” 

“i am performing, dad.” the voice is calm and collected and you try to tiptoe, just barely catching sight of the brown locks

“no u r not. zhu zhengting, u r a boy, u cannot do this kind of girly things! it makes u look v 娘* do you know that? a disgrace, an utter disgrace!”

the voice rings as everyone falls silent, heads turning towards zhengting, waiting for his response to the harsh comment. 

“i will prove to you that there is nothing to be ashamed of.” he quietly says, bowing and turning his heel, head held high, with no sign of regret or disappointment 

as you watch the figure go, everything falls together like pieces of a puzzle

why he works so hard 

why when it already seems perfect enuf, he still practices, saying there is still space for improvement 

why he was so desperate to get the main role 

he wanted to b in the spotlight and give a flawless performance bc he wanted to prove to his father, that boys dont have to b restrained to a singular activity and stereotype. they can do whatever they want, so long as they like it 

guilt washes over u as u watch his father storm after his son, realising that this man is a reflection of you

new found respect is the word u will use on zhengting. 

everyone applauds him. an art form shld never be restricted to a gender.

ur heart opens up to him more, and admiration for him blooms as u watch him place high expectations on himself, doing a particular move over and over again, even tho in your eyes, it alr seems perfect enuf

just like how he is to you; perfect and flawless

its addicting to watch him. his pale arms, his clean movements, his strong legs, his silky brown locks, the way his eyes sparkle when he talks about dance, the way the edges crinkle when he laughs, the way he is so bubbly about everything.

and he starts to take notice of you too, helping you to readjust properly, telling you tricks and tips on how to keep perfect balance, how to put the correct about of strength into a movement. 

for the next few weeks, you end up gg hme later than usual, staying bck with more than an hour just to spend time with him, and not gg to lie, you r falling for him 

but... you kinda don’t rlly knw i mean 

he’s nice to everyone

what makes you so special?

anywayyyyyyy

FINALLY RECITAL DAY WOOHOO

everyone’s pretty hyped about it

but u knw the main dancers will be extremely nervous and u decide to go find zhengting in his dressing room, just to give him assurance, if he needs any.

“zhengting?”

“hmmm?” he says (???) as he turns around and oMLORD JESUS CHRIST IS HE A BEAUT

the eyeshadow makes him look sultry, the foundation emphasising how his skin is flawless and hydrated, his eyebrows strong and dark, a true prince indeed

he snaps his fingers, pulling u out of yr trance. “did you want to say anything?” u hear a hint of hope and u almost smirk 

“uh...you look good? and good luck.” you mumble, tripping over your words, unused to a god-like creature looking at u with such intensity in his dark eyes

“what did you say?” he teases, cheekiness flowing through his words

“i said,” you clear your throat. “you look good and good luck for your performance

how you wish to wipe that smirk off that face, if not for the fact that u secretly find it EXTREMELY HOT and your cheeks are flaring red at the sight of it.

“if u want to wish me good luck,” he leans forward. flirtatious. “how about a kiss on the cheek?” 

you roll your eyes and try to push him away but he is quick to grab your hands and stop them midway, intertwining your cold, clammy ones with his own.

“please?” 

“fine,” you try to sound nonchalant but the nervousness is so evident that u see the smirk creeping up his face again.

lips barely brush over the smooth skin and you pull away, blood surging upwards into the blood vessels of your face.

“bye,” you want nothing more than to dig a hole and hide your burning face 

“see you afterwards?” 

but u’ve already rushed out and he chuckles to himself, warmth oozing thru his being, and his cheeks flush as he thinks about the kiss you give him. 

he will definitely have to find you later to give you a proper one ;)

you guys wld b cute buBS UWU

my endings suck dbhasdjbfhjdbkjf

[my-hero-aaron]

Provisional Licenses, Part 4

Well, everyone else did, anyway. I was the last one in, and I didn’t really get any prep time like anyone else. Instead, I stood still, reaching out with my senses to see if there was any cold for me to hold onto. Thankfully, there was someone dashing by in what looked like a full suit of armor, and that much metal, even in this heat, had plenty of cold for me to pull in.

My hand thrust outward toward the stranger, and the cold had the air shimmering slightly before it slipped into the bracer on my arm, and from there into my chestplate. By the time I had taken all that was safe to pull, the chestplate had enough of a store that there was at least some slushiness occuring in the liquid within. It’d have to do, I mused, rushing to catch up with K, who was staring contemplatively at a tower of rubble. A cursory glance with my thermal vision made it clear there was someone ensconced in the rock. The solution looked pretty simple to me. “K, I’m just gonna shatter the rubble, that’ll make for a simple path!” My arms crossed slightly, one steadying the other as my fingers splayed in a familiar gesture. The residual cold in my hand from the harvesting I’d pulled earlier blasted forward, but before the ring of superchilled air could slam into the rock, Kailey had reacted with an outstretched hand of her own. A little waver materialized in the air, and the next thing I knew, the blast that was headed away from me mere moments before was now sticking pieces of frost in my hair.

“kAILEY WHAT WAS THAT FO-”

Kailey’s outstretched finger begged me to shush, or at least wait with my outburst.

“Aaron, if you had broken that piece of rock, the whole pile would have come down on that guy in there. Look a little closer, there’s no other support for the biggest piece on the right. We need to lever them apart, not break them up.”

I cast a little more critical eye at the pile, and, surprising nobody, she was right. The whole thing was essentially a precariously balanced henge with no keystone, and I definitely would have, at best, endangered the guy, and at worst, required some incredible intervention from K to save him. Taking a deep breath, I stepped in closer, this time pressing my hand against the rock on the right. This would take finesse, but I was pretty sure I could manage a small pillar of ice to widen the opening in the rubble. I could feel my pulse, well, pulsing, in my hands as the passage of time seemed to slow. For all I knew, K was lending me a helping hand, and it was. The thought had my breath pick up a bit, but soon enough the rhythm stabilized as my focus shrunk to the rock in front of me. The rock could only take so much before getting fragile, and it was pretty clear any decrease in what was required to break the rock would go poorly. With a bit of coaxing, the pool of cold started to form in just the right spot, and soon enough with a bit more pushing the rubble started to creak and rumble, ice expanding between the two largest pieces.

“Alright, it should be stable enough. Can you move to get out?” I called into the darkness, the heat of the victim’s outline sharp against the chill I’d been putting into the concrete. The guy had hardly gotten the negative reply out of his mouth before K set to work crawling in to save the dude. Once she’d pulled him out, I squinted, focusing on seeing just where the most heat signatures were. That was, odds are, where my fellow heroes had set up triage. Well, that, or a group of schoolkids had gotten trapped. Either way, it’d be best for us to head that way. Judging by the noticeable limp the actor was effecting, there was no way I could make him walk all that distance at any kind of speed.

“Sir, I’m going to lift you, okay? K-I mean... Stellaria, grab onto my cape, we’re gonna need to get places fast, as usual. Hang on tight.” With a bit of effort, I swept the victim off his feet, and nodded back at K, skates forming on our feet. I really should talk to support about getting some actual skates built into my boots. Would save some time. I mused as we started to sail over to the (now a bit more clearly marked) triage area.

We carried on saving folks like that for a bit, digging them out of the rubble with great precision thanks to Kailey’s analysis and my leverage. Most of the time was spent skating them over to triage as fast as possible. However, it wasn’t long before another large blast rung around the arena, and feedback slammed the speakers above our heads once again.

“The villain’s attack is not over yet! You now have to deal with their onslaught on top of the rescue efforts, good luck!”

Somewhat unceremoniously, the victim overdramatically slumped in my arms was dropped into the outstretched arms of Kailey. As interesting as it was to play the rescue role, my place was in opposition to the villains, and I knew it.

“Stellaria, get this person safe. I’ll handle the attack.” I hurriedly said, taking the cold from K’s skates as I set a hand on hers for a moment. The spin I pulled to get moving toward the now-smoking hole in the wall wouldn’t have looked out of place at a figure skating arena, but that wasn’t the only move I had borrowed from ice-sports. A hapless looking minion had rushed ahead of his peers, and, unfortunately for him, slipped onto my incoming path of ice. A well-placed shoulder check that was clearly borrowed from the hockey playbook had him slam, butt first, onto the ice. A simple thought was all it took to bind his hands and feet to the ice as I skated around him. One down, a whole lot to go. I mused, my skates dissolving mid stride to transform my gait into a jog. I was one of the first ones to arrive, and it showed, the large crowd of nondescript, black jumpsuited villains still spreading out to cause mayhem. As I stalled, trying to come up with something clever to distract the villains, a familiar face strolled up next to me, his stride remarkably confident for the ice coating the ground. I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes at Zanshin’s analytical expression, and instead turned to him, my gaze slipping up to his face. Had he gotten taller since I’d seen him before the test?

“Zanshin, any ideas? There’s a lot of them, and I’ve got a few options for crowd control.”

“As far as I can tell, they’re going to be spreading out quick. I can give you a few places to build walls to hamstring them, if that’s what you need.” Zanshin intoned, cool as a cucumber despite the strain of the situation. I did my best to not squint at the noticable increase he’d had in muscle mass since we’d last actually spoke as well, shaking my head a bit to clear it of the clutter. What the heck am I doing? This is a CRISIS, not an episode of Grey’s Anatomy.

“I was thinking a few small snowstorms, but I’d need either some wind pulses or someone with a water quirk to pull that off. Walls would be a good start.” The pace of my breath picked up a bit, and to aid in my focus, I started stomping my feet a bit, the rhythm of my steps synchronizing with the pulses of cold I was putting out. Out of the corner of my eye, Zanshin was giving me what could most easily be described as a bemused look. Unfortunately, that was just enough to throw me off, and only one of the three walls I was planning on making had materialized before I stumbled, face planting with a great deal of force in front of the tall, dark, and handsome young man at my side. Doubly unfortunately, the one wall I had made now funneled the villains in the direction of the triage area, rather than into the second wall, then into us. Thankfully, that was still a long way off, but we had to get moving quick if we wanted to cut them off. I rolled over with a groan, my hand finding Zanshin’s outstretched one like it was fate.

“On your feet, twinkle toes, we’ve gotta get recalculating.”

I grit my teeth, heaving a sigh to let go of my anger. It wasn’t worth making a fuss right now, and more important things were at hand anyway. I sprung to my feet, and nodded, glancing forward to see a group of the minions hopping the obstacle I’d tossed in front of them, rushing at us.

“Well you can know what they’re doing, Zanshin, let’s see how well you take advantage of that.” I quipped at my compatriot, dashing forward into the fray. Feeling dramatic, I let a little fog slip from the palms of my hands, and a little frost creep onto my face to give me a bit of a harsher edge. As I ran into the midst of the group of the ski-masked dudes, it was clear that those little touches were absolutely having an effect on them. They seemed, at the least, a bit rattled. Almost reflexively, I snapped a set of finger guns at them, and my abilities responded in kind, blasts of cold slamming into each person’s chest as I pointed, leaving them stumbling backwards, winded. Once they had all gotten a taste of what I was giving them, I slammed a hand, palm down, into the ground, restraints blooming out of the dirt and concrete around us to keep them neutralized.

“Huh. I wasn’t expecting that to work, honestly.” I mumbled, flicking my hands a bit to keep them from freezing up completely.

“Gonna be honest with you, Frigius, I’m shocked you pulled that off too.”

“Oh you shush, I totally meant to do that.”

“Did you, Mr. I didn’t expect that to work?”

“So much for me getting away with mumbling anything.” I mumbled, Zanshin simply responding with a chuckle this time.

As we geared up to rush into the fray proper, where a noticeable number of our fellow testees were embroiled in a fight with some dude who had a, if I was honest, a pretty gross looking bug-head, a final screech of interference blasted out of the speakers above our heads.

“Alright, everyone! The victims have all been handled, and thus, the test is over! Head to the medical office if you’ve got wounds to be treated, or the gathering area if you don’t! Additionally, you’ll have to remove your costumes now. I’ll be seeing you in a little while to present the results of the test!”

Thankfully, I didn’t have any damage that I could notice, other than maybe a little stiffness in my fingers, so after getting out of my costume, I eagerly awaited the arrival of the results, fidgeting a bit in my energy. A little bit of waiting later, K wandered into the room, a small bandage marking a little scratch on her head. She was otherwise unharmed, thank goodness. Oliver wasn’t far behind her, and he was no worse for wear. With my pals beside me, the wait for the results flew by. Before we knew it, the list of 80 names had scrolled onto the screen. They were in alphabetical order, so first I spotted my name, then K’s, then finally Oliver’s. We’d managed to pass, and I couldn’t help but let out a whoop of glee, moving to sweep K into a deep dip, kissing her. I had felt that I’d barely gotten started before K placed a gentle hand on my chest, pushing us apart.

“O-okay Aaron, we can... celebrate more later.” K’s little moment of sensibility didn’t do a thing to dampen my mood, however. We now all had our provisional licenses, and this was a huge step forward! Looking a bit closer at the list, I saw every one of our classmate’s names. Well, everybody but one: Neito. That was going to be atrocious to deal with later, he’s always so dreadfully overdramatic. Thankfully, Zanshin’s efforts had put him on the list as well, so his efforts, valiant as they were, weren’t in vain. However, before I could really get to stewing on Zanshin’s performance, the more detailed results sheets were being handed out, and I got mine. Unsurprisingly, I got docked points for how I handled the arrival of the villains, but to my shock, I got just enough points back to pass for my work with Zanshin. The fact that I was working with someone outside my own group, even despite my major fumbling, reflected well for my cooperative efforts in the future, or at least, that was what the comments on the page said. Regardless, I’d take it. A pass was a pass, no matter how strange. I could tell a new page was turning in our lives at this point. We now had the authority of full heroes, at least in certain circumstances, and the adventures coming for us because of that were going to be simply remarkable.

[thejilyship]

Wishing you all a Good Evening - Part Seven

AN: Alright so here is the last part. It’s much shorter than the last few parts and completely fluff and not necessary to the plot but I never write this part of the fic and wanted to give it a go. So enjoy Sirius teasing Lily and Lily teasing James and James being too blissful to give a damn. 

WC: 2.3K

PART ONE | PART TWO | PART THREE | PART FOUR | PART FIVE | PART SIX | PART SEVEN |ff.net

It didn’t take long for things to between James and Lily to turn into more than one date after a weekday show. And while her nerves didn’t just evaporate, as she worried about everything normally, she never felt like hiding from James or shrugging him off or giving him polite smiles as means of a deterrence. Quite the opposite really. She found herself far more inclined to hide with James and snog him.

And they did quite a bit of hiding, because she wasn’t too keen on anyone posting any photos of the two of them and giving actual credibility to the whole, #jily nonsense. Of course, after a few weeks, it wasn’t nonsense so much as it was true, but still, she didn’t want anyone to know that they were right. At least not yet. And James, keen as he had been about posting that first picture of the two of them, was in agreement. He didn’t seem to want to walk their new relationship into the spotlight now that it was actually a relationship.

After a couple of months though, it became just unreasonable to hide, and while there was a certain minority that freaked out, most people seemed to have already assumed that they were dating and weren’t surprised at all.

Sirius was another person who hadn’t been surprised at all by the change in James and Lily’s relationship. Though he did love to give her a hard time about it whenever he could. Including this morning.

“Looking good, red.” He said, walking into the kitchen of the house he shared with James. Lily was clad in one of James’ t-shirts and a pair of leggings, and she was frying up some eggs while making coffee and toast.

She looked over her shoulder at him and scoffed. “At least I’m wearing more than you are.”

“I actually live here,” He reminded her, grabbing a mug from the shelf and going to wait by the coffee pot. “Unlike some interlopers I know.” He gave her a pointed look and she returned the favor.

“You know, you’re awfully ornery in the morning.”

“Well maybe it’s because I couldn’t get to sleep last night. Seems like some kind of ghost has moved in above my room. Always moaning about and causing a ruckus.”

Lily felt her cheeks heat up at the thought of Sirius having heard anything of the sort, but she shook her head. “We didn’t even- we were studying last night.” She muttered, turning back to the stove.

Sirius let out a bark of laughter and then picked up the coffee pot, helping himself. “What is it that you were studying? Anatomy?”

“Shut up,” She muttered, wishing that James hadn’t decided to take a shower just then so that he would be down here to properly tell off his mate. Or apologize, she wasn’t sure which was appropriate here. Probably both.

“I mean don’t get me wrong, I’m all for Prongs getting some, and he’s been much more tolerable since you’ve come round to the idea of-“

“Letting him woo me?” She interrupted, not wanting to know what it was that he had been about to say.

He laughed again and then there was a mug of coffee on the counter next to the stove and Sirius was leaning against the counter next to her. “Yeah. Thank goodness for that,” He said, winking at her, adding just a slight emphasis to the word ‘goodness.’

She and Sirius were friends now, good friends she liked to think. “I’ll have to agree with you there.”

“Agree with him about what?” James walked into the kitchen and Lily looked over at him and shrugged at the same moment that Sirius did. “You two aren’t allowed to keep secrets from me you know.”

“I can do whatever the hell I want to.” Sirius said with more bite than was necessary, pushing himself off the counter and walking over to the table, coffee in hand.

“And what’s your argument?” James took Sirius’s vacated spot against the counter and Lily looked up at him.

“Oh no, his argument works for me too. I can also do whatever I want.”

James didn’t seem to mind that they didn’t tell him what they’d been talking about, because he seemed to like the fact that they were friends. He’d seemed nervous the first couple of times that Lily had hung around with him and Sirius. He’d told her that it was because Sirius had never liked any of his girlfriends before, and her response was that he’d apparently been dating terrible people if absolutely no one liked them.

She hadn’t been worried though. She knew that she and Sirius would get along. She’d never had a problem making friends, and Sirius had seemed to have made up his mind about her after their first meeting in the library anyway.

Remus wasn’t hard to get along with either. It turned out that the two of them actually did have quite a bit in common, and he wasn’t as rough around the edges as James or Sirius. And Peter, who had forgiven her for saying that he wasn’t a real person while she’d been drunk, came round to her as well.

And the fact that she got along with his mates was good, because she’d been spending an awful lot of time at his house during the last few months. A lot of time.

She flipped the eggs in the pan and then pulled out a couple plates, getting it all fixed up before walking over to the table and sitting in the chair that she usually sat in.

“You two leaving soon?” Sirius asked as James walked over with their drinks and sat down as well.

“Not real soon, why?”

“Because I want you to leave.” He shrugged, taking a piece of James’ toast and stuffing it into his mouth. James rolled his eyes.

“You know, you don’t have to pretend that you don’t love us,” Lily said, picking up her fork so she could eat her eggs.

“I’m not pretending that I don’t love you, don’t be ridiculous. I just want a quiet house to myself for a bit. Remus is at the library with Emmeline and Peter is working at the shop.”

“Lily and I won’t bother you.” Lily could feel her face heating up prematurely as she was a bit worried about what Sirius would say to that, given what he’d said to her earlier. He laughed, and she looked up seeing that he’d been looking at her.

“Your girlfriend knows that’s a lie.”

“I know no such thing.” She said determinedly and shoveled more food into her mouth.

James looked back and forth between the two of them and then sighed, “I’m not going to ask.”

“That’s for the best.” Sirius said, still smirking at Lily’s expense. Then he picked up his coffee and now a piece of Lily’s toast and headed for the door. “Thanks for breakfast.”

“You’re most welcome.” Lily replied sarcastically.

“You know he’s just messing around, right?”

“Sweet heart, it’s been a few months, of course I know he’s just messing around.”

“Right.” He nodded. “I’ve been apologizing for him most of my life. It’s just habit.”

“I’m sure it’s one I’ll pick up,” She grinned, reaching for her coffee and taking a sip. She didn’t realize that James was staring at her until after she put it down and he hadn’t said anything in response. “What?” She asked, narrowing her brow slightly.

He shrugged one of his shoulders and smirked, turning back to his meal. “Nothing. I just like it when you casually mention that you’re going to be hanging around for a while.”

She rolled her eyes, because even though she definitely did plan on sticking with James as long as she could, she didn’t like him having turned her slight at Sirius into something sappy. She wasn’t a sappy person. “A habit only takes thirty days to form, James.” She huffed out dramatically.

He laughed, “Well alright then, I’ve got at least thirty more days with you. I’ll take it.” She waited a moment before looking at him, wanting to make sure that he was looking at his food first so that she didn’t get caught. She got caught quite a bit, but she didn’t get caught slightly more. She was almost always watching him it seemed. And the small smirk on his lips let her know that he knew she was looking, but she didn’t really mind so long as he was willing to play along.

“So what should we do today?” Lily asked, “We don’t have to be at the studio until four.”

He shrugged. “I don’t know, but I guess Sirius wants us out of the house. We could go get you a proper jersey for the next game you come to. You can support me in more than just spirt.” She rolled her eyes.

“We don’t need to buy one,” She said, pushing her plate away and pulling her coffee forward. “I can just wear one of your old ones or something.”

He looked over at her and ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know if you’re being cute or if you just genuinely don’t want to spend money on a football jersey.”

She pursed her lips and looked at him. “Clearly it’s the later.”

“Right because you don’t like being cute.” He rolled his eyes to mock her and she shoved his shoulder.

“I’m cute all the time thanks, I just don’t want you to live under false assumptions.” She took a sip of her coffee and then leaned over and rested her head on his shoulder. “You know I like you though, that’s enough.”

“You don’t just like me,” He grinned, turning his head and pressing a kiss to her forehead. “You told me just the other day that you love me.” She hummed quietly and then nodded.

“I did say that, and I suppose I do.”

“Always so reluctant.”

“I’m not reluctant.” Lily argued, “I’m just a bit difficult at times.” James laughed at that.

“You were difficult for about twelve hours three months ago and that’s it.” She rolled her eyes again.

“Fine. But I’m not reluctant. I’m just not a sap.”

“But you love me.”

“That’s starting to be questionable.” She warned him, turning her head and putting her chin on his shoulder now. She didn’t remember falling in love with him, she just realized one day that she did so of course she was just giving him a hard time now.

“Nah,” He shook his head, kissing her cheek now.

“Nah,” She agreed, reaching up her hand to tangle into his hair. “I love you.” She said quietly, turning his head so he could kiss him.

“I love you too,” He said, cupping her cheek and pulling her close. She still got a rush every time he pulled her close.

However, their kiss didn’t last for too long before they were interrupted.

“Honestly you two,” Sirius���s voice came from the other side of the kitchen and James chuckled as he pulled away. Lily slouched back in her chair and tried not to feel disappointed. James would probably be able to tell and then he’d tease her about it.

“Sorry mate.” He stood up to clean up their dishes. “I can’t keep her off me.” He ended up teasing her anyway.

Lily clicked her tongue. “Bastard.” She muttered and then got up herself. “Keep that up and see where it gets you.” She warned him.

“You’ve told him that you love him,” Sirius said and Lily looked over at him. At least he was wearing a shirt this time. “He’s going to be insufferable now.”

“How long were you listening?” Lily narrowed her eyes at him.

“Not long, Red. You think James didn’t come running to tell me the moment he got the chance?” James whipped the dishrag at him, but Sirius didn’t seem to mind. He just laughed and tossed it at Lily.

“Of course he did,” She grinned. “He’s completely smitten with me.”

“I am.” He nodded. “Glad to be so too.”

“Okay, I’m gonna stop you right there,” Sirius held up a finger and shook his head slowly.

“You came back down here.” Lily shrugged. “If he wasn’t to be sweet on me, I’m not going to stop him.”

“But you won’t return the favor.” James teased, and Lily shrugged.

“I’m plenty sweet, just not sappy.”

“Thank god,” Sirius said. He looked over at James. “You know, I might end up liking her more if you keep this up.” Lily smirked and then looked at Sirius.

“Careful, he gets sappier if you mention the fact that I’ll be sticking around for long enough for that to happen.”

“I don’t even mind you two ganging up on me, I’m in love and I don’t care what you two say.” He grinned at the both of them and then frowned. “Which is a weird thing to say to your girlfriend I’m realizing.” Lily shrugged and Sirius laughed.

“Alright, come on boys, I’ve decided that we’re all going to the library to study with Remus and Em. I’ve done very little of my homework all weekend.”

“You told me that you were studying last night,” Sirius said, feigning innocence.

“Oh hush up,” Lily snapped. “Go and get your books.” She pointed in the direction of the room. “Both of you,” She looked at James as well. He sighed and then left the kitchen to do as he was told.

Things had changed quickly, and while Lily normally wasn’t good at adjusting to change, this was a good change and she was too excited and hopeful to think that it wasn’t worth the adjustment. She smiled as she thought about what her daily life had turned into and then left the kitchen as well to get dressed and collect her books.

[quietpagan]

TH Under Sunlight, ch 5

Barbara did not keep wine or any alcohol that wasn’t for medical purposes in the house after her one regrettable binge four years ago, when James first left. She wasn’t a heavy drinker in any way – she hardly even drank socially – but when everything became overwhelming the temptation to just let all her worries float down a river of wine was mighty strong.

And hot damn was it powerful now.

Trolls.

So trolls were a thing.

Her son had twenty stitches in his leg because of trolls and they all wanted him and her to visit them in their magical troll-land with swords and trolls and it already sounded like an alcohol-induced dream, except that she was distinctly and distressingly sober.

It had taken a long time to get Jim to go to bed, even though he was tired after a long night and day being poked and prodded at the hospital. But Barbara needed to speak with her three visitors, and she wanted to do it without her young son listening.

The three trolls were quietly murmuring to themselves when she came back downstairs, some of her furniture shifted and the curtains drawn over every window. The biggest one noticed her, but didn’t give away that she was watching them, and she observed for a minute, taking in their differing physiologies and personalities.

Kanjigar, it was clear, did not want any part of this, but he looked like he was duty-bound to go along anyway. Barbara wasn’t sure what his part was – was he a bodyguard? A soldier? Who else would parade around in a glowing suit of armor? He deferred to Blinky at the moment but Barbara had the notion that he was only doing so out of respect for the other troll, especially since Blinky had introduced him as ‘Master’ Kanjigar.

The big one, the behemoth AAARRRGGHH, was the one who put Barbara the most at ease, once they had finally all simmered down enough to give him a proper introduction. He’d knocked into the bookshelf and hit his head against the ceiling more than once, but his huge hand was gentle on Blinky’s shoulder and he smiled with his whole face. Barbara wasn’t sure about his unusual speech – possibly a head injury, possibly just difficulty with a second language. He’d had the least to say, but he gave off the warmest presence.

But Blinky, now.

Blinky seemed the most concerned about Jim’s wellbeing, but he had also chosen to take her son in secret into a dangerous troll population without thinking about the possible consequences. Jim clearly adored the troll, but for someone with so many eyes he was a bit of a blind idiot.

But he had taken responsibility for his actions, and seemed relieved at not having to keep himself and his companions a secret from Barbara. She knew that he had put himself in danger of punishment in keeping his friendship with Jim, and he had been prepared to accept her conditions as well as respect the possibly of her banishing him forever from visiting Jim. Out of the three trolls, Barbara felt that her son was safest around Blinky.

But that didn’t mean that she actually trusted any of them with her son.

Barbara marched up to the group, which separated when she approached. She ignored Kanjigar and AAARRRGGHH’s huge mass, and stopped mere inches away from Blinky, who leaned back to avoid the finger she stabbed at his face.

“If my son ever gets hurt on your watch again, you can be sure that I will learn everything about troll anatomy and use it against you. I’ve already identified four easy targets on your body and I will hit every one of them.”

Barbara had to stalk forward as Blinky stepped backward.

“I assure you, you vicious harpy, violence is unnecessary! I wish no more for any harm to come to young Jim than you do!”

“And I would appreciate it if you would stop threatening my trolls,” said Kanjigar dryly. “Their safety is my duty, and I will protect them from you if I have to.”

I’ve got two possible targets on you, Barbara thought viciously, picking out his exposed eyes and unarmored groin, though she was reluctant to say it out loud. He did, after all, have a sword strapped to his back, and she was only beginning her krav maga classes.

She turned away from him, unable to think of anything civil to say. His protective abilities were seriously overestimated if he thought that putting a nine-year-old in an armory was a solid idea.

“Your restraint and understanding, as it is, is admirable,” murmured Blinky when she looked back at him. “After what you have discovered this evening, I am admittedly surprised that you have not, as you humans say, ‘given us the boot’.”

Barbara smiled ruefully and gently squeezed between him and Blinky.

“Let me make you a cup of tea,” she said. “Make yourselves comfortable, because we need to talk.”

As she puttered around the kitchen she watched the trolls from under her lashes. AAARRRGGHH pushed her table and chairs out of the way so that he could settle comfortably on the floor, while Blinky sat down in the armchair. Given that he had apparently spent the whole day in the house, Barbara wasn’t surprised that he was the most comfortable.

Kanjigar didn’t sit, but stood near the wall, occasionally walking around the room, looking at her books and the photographs in the hallway.

She put four cups of tea on a tray and marched into the living room, passing the cups to everyone before sitting down on the couch, closest to Blinky. Kanjigar looked like he wasn’t sure what to do with the miniscule teacup in his gigantic gloves, while AAARRRGGHH promptly ate his, saucer and all. Blinky sipped on his like a normal person, and she gestured for him to begin negotiations.

Of all the things Barbara imagined she’d go through in her divorce, she never thought she’d be arranging visitation rights for a troll.

There was a sudden BUMP against the floor above them, and Barbara stamped her foot.

“James Lake Jr, go back to bed this instant!” A quick, one-legged hop echoed through the ceiling, and Jim’s bedroom door shut. Kanjigar chuckled quietly.

“I can see why you like the boy, Blinkous.” The six-eyed troll grinned.

“He does grow on a person. After even a day, I would consider him a good friend.”

 It was difficult to say whether or not the human woman thought that that was a good thing. Her face was surprisingly difficult to read at times, although Kanjigar admittedly had not spent enough time in the company of humans so as to learn how to read them.

He knew that she was distrustful and he could not blame her. He could imagine what the situation looked like under her eyes: three enormous monsters, leading her son into danger. If the roles were reversed, and Draal were the one in danger, he would…

…do nothing, as he had sworn to do. His son could not rely on him, and he had made it that way deliberately. Sooner or later, Bular would end up killing him, and he couldn’t risk Draal coming to the same end because of his father’s duty.

But Jim was a small child, son to a human woman who did not bear the responsibility of protecting her entire people.

…Or did she?

Kanjigar realized suddenly that having a human acquaintance could be incredibly useful; she could go where he could not. She could keep an eye out for Changeling activity. She could be the key to getting a leg up on Bular.

Suddenly the idea of making friends with this human wasn’t nearly as bad.

This could also make her and her son’s introduction to Trollmarket significantly less difficult, if they spun it to Vendel that she was his new contact. But one thing had to be done first.

Kanjigar drew another gaggletack out of his pocket, to Blinky’s indignant cry.

“Lady Barabara, would you mind holding onto this for a moment – “

“Master Kanjigar!”

The gaggletack did nothing, but it was his job to check. He hadn’t told anyone about the Changelings in Arcadia yet, to avoid a panic, but it was a constant concern for him. He wasn’t sure who exactly to trust anymore, and he couldn’t just smack every troll in the Heartstone with a gaggletack, not if he wanted to keep everyone calm for now.

But it did ease his mind to make sure that Jim and his mother were completely human.

The human woman waved the gaggletack around for a moment, and Kanjigar was suddenly very aware that he had just handed a violent woman a heavy piece of iron. He took it back before she felt the urge to use it.

“What was that for?” Blinky chuckled nervously.

“Oh, heh, that. Is. Just a simple troll custom,” he said quickly, “a left-over from the tenth century, where trolls would hand a horseshoe to a new acquaintance as a gesture of sharing the luck of the household – “ “Forgot that bit,” AAARRRGGHH muttered with a grin, earning a thrown glare from Blinky.

“It is a totem,” Kanjigar said. “It ensures that you are not a Changeling, the specifics of which I will go into on another night. For now, I believe we are overdue in Trollmarket.”

It couldn’t be past midnight, but he was eager to go on patrol and the longer they stayed out, the harder it would be to get AAARRRGGHH and Blinky back into Trollmarket without drawing the attention of Bular.

“Well, you’re welcome to leave,” said Barbara, standing impatiently. “But I’m not finished with Blinky.”

The troll in question looked rather unhappy at the notion of being the singular point of the woman’s attention, and Kanjigar wasn’t happy himself with her continued control of the conversation. But he wasn’t ready to reveal to Barbara why the night was dangerous, not yet. She needed time to process, and to simmer her temper. He would visit her another evening, and tell her his proposition.

“I am unsure what else to say,” Blinky admit. “Our continued friendship with Jim is at your prerogative. But may I suggest: we do not limit the relationship to just the whelp? Though my face still hurts from your previous assault, you have proven to not just be swift of arm but of wit as well. Our friendship with Jim does not have to come with the exclusion of his mother.” Barbara smiled softly, and Kanjigar knew that she was struck. Blinky’s gentle manner and quiet sincerity had charmed many a violent heart, as evidenced by the behemoth sitting beside him.

“Both of us care about Jim,” he continued gently. “He is all the better for our cooperation and friendship.” Just on the edge of hearing, there was another muffled thud on the floor above, followed by a quiet ‘ow’.

Both Barbara and Blinky were up in an instant. Blinky was closest to the stairs but Barbara’s long legs overstepped him, and he was forced to stomp after her. Kanjigar didn’t follow for a moment, but looked over at AAARRRGGHH, who happily munched on Barbara’s wooden tray now that she couldn’t see.

“What are your thoughts on this, old friend?”

AAARRRGGHH examined the dwelling with practiced eyes, his ears pricked to the concerned conversation upstairs. “Blinky never wanted kids,” he said. Kanjigar narrowed his eyes. Even after centuries of knowing the two, he still wasn’t quite sure what exactly their relationship entailed. They were unusually close, even for the closest of friends, but he had never seen anything that definitely indicated something other. Certainly nothing that would have precluded the desire to raise a child together, although – if either troll were to do so, Kanjigar could never envision one doing so without the other.

“Likes Jim. If Blinky wants family, Jim family.”

He struggled for a moment, and then gave up on English. “I’ve never seen him act parental before, but he cares about the whelp. I’ll support him. Jim is a good kid.”

Kanjigar nodded, bending an ear to the muted words of said troll on the floor above, chastising the child for sneaking out of bed at the detriment of his own health. Both Blinky and Barbara were assuring the boy that no friendships had been dissolved and no trolls had been banished from the house. The boy uttered a ‘goodnight’ to both adults.

Having one of his trolls proclaim himself in all but words the father of a human whelp was a complication and situation that Kanjigar had never anticipated on experiencing. Much less from Blinky.

As long as nobody got hit with a crutch again, he would be happy.

Stepping carefully up the stairs, he witnessed what seemed to be the peaceful closing of negotiations.

“It is past time for us to return,” Blinky was saying. Kanjigar was extremely bemused to see Barbara put her hand upon his arm.

“Thank you,” she said softly. “I guess tomorrow night will be okay?”

“Quite agreeable,” the troll replied. They both noticed Kanjigar watching them from halfway up the stairs. “Shall we, Master Kanjigar?” AAARRRGGHH did not seem surprised to see Blinky and Barbara chatting amiably, and Kanjigar respected his lead, falling once more to the shadows as they left the house with the promise to return. Barbara waved them out, the light from the house illuminating the open doorway, but just as the door closed he saw the remains of conflict in her eyes.

“Please tell me I haven’t made a huge mistake,” he heard her mutter, just as darkness once more reigned the night.

 A/N: Barbara was surprisingly gung-ho about Jim hanging around with Strickler and inviting his ‘guidance counselor’ into his house, for such a protective parent. From personal experience I’m a little nervous about teachers taking such special interest in their students, but perhaps Arcadia is a relatively safe and trusting town. Poor Barbara, having to mediate an agreement to give a strange troll the self-chosen role of ‘new dad’.

Also, there are two people you don’t want to piss off: the people who serve you food, and the people who serve you medicine. Doctors and nurses know where everything hurts the most and what exactly will trigger it in just the right way.

Very tiny nod to the book at first, if you can spot it. Book!AAARRRGGHH!!! had a rock embedded into her head by Gunmar the Asshole, causing her not-so-eloquent speech.

I am so prepared for Barbara and Blinky to be besties, but Barbara’s got a little distrust to get through first. She’s also very difficult to write. Little tip: when you’re stuck, make something unexpected happen or change the POV. That’s why we heard Jim sneaking around upstairs, the change to Kanjigar’s POV, and Jim falling and hurting himself. If you can’t think of a way to continue what you wrote, don’t. Interrupt your writing and go on from there.

Personally, Kanjigar is not my favorite. I know that he deeply loves his son, but I don’t agree with his decision to cut Draal out of his life, and we – and Barbara – will definitely be exploring that. As for his decision to make Barbara a contact, we’ve seen him be very resourceful and willing to use people when he thought it necessary.

I told you the BLAAARRRGGHHY ship would be up to interpretation, and it still is. Two bros can raise a kid together, you don’t know their life.

Also can be found on ffn and AO3