#ALSO THE CHESS SCENE THOSE SCENES WERE SO GOOD MY GOD

[genericpuff]

I know LO has been over for a while but something that's always confused me is the 10 year punishment thing. (I dropped the comic before the judgment so correct me if im wrong)

apparently Persephone was sentenced to 10 years in the mortal realm. Yet she complains that Zeus keeps extending her punishment but the timeskip only ends up being 10 years? (From 20 yrs old to 30). that makes it sound like she had a shorter sentence that was extended to 10 yrs (what a fuckin slap on the wrist if it was).

Either her punishment was 10 yrs and Perse was just banking on early parole release or she always had a short sentence which ended up being a measly 10 yrs anyway.

But then that would mean Demeter's punishment period was either tied directly to Persephone's or (for some reason) she had a full 10 yr sentence while Persephone got an initial shorter period

If it's not either of those then shouldn't her punishment be longer? 11, 12, 15, 20 yrs instead? Would make more sense that she was mad if she had to serve at least twice as long as she was told to

Ah so actually she wasn't sentenced to 10 years, she was basically sentenced to a perpetual punishment until Zeus felt certain conditions were met, such as her filling all of the responsibilities of Demeter and turning Minthe back to normal.

So the reason it wound up being 10 years was because Zeus kept finding reasons to extend the sentencing, clearly in an attempt to keep her away from Apollo as he was already suspecting that he might use Persephone's fertility goddess powers to overthrow him.

(joke's on Zeus though, he was overthrown with a poison cupcake lmaooo)

That said, Persephone was... really dumb when she failed her 10th inspection. Primarily because she broke one of the rules Zeus put in place for her before he did the inspection-

Like it's really funny in hindsight to read this scene because at the time the narrative was definitely trying to make us believe that Zeus was the bad guy here, and to a point he's definitely fucking around and not actually planning on letting her out of confinement while also doing jack shit to get to the bottom of his own suspicions regarding his son... but also girl, if your plan was to prove to Zeus that you had filled your end of the bargain, then why try and give him the letter prior to your once-a-year inspection? Either you're failed again over some arbitrary made-up bullshit reason so you can use the guilt-trip method after he's already screwed you over, or best case, you pass and you can deliver the letter to Hades yourself! It was a really dumb move on her part to immediately jump to asking him to bend the rules he made for her when she should know Zeus isn't gonna feel obligated to 'owe' her anything, and is completely contrary to her being as "smart and cunning" as the narrative tries to make us believe (remember when she hustled Hades at chess and lied to him about having a driver's license? where's that Persephone?)

And yeah Zeus really isn't wrong when it comes to how Persephone herself is such a "uwu look at me I'm a smol widdle baby girl, please break the terms of my punishment for me because I asked with tented eyebrows bats eyelashes" , this is honestly why so many people like Zeus as a character in LO contrary to how much the narrative tries to make us hate him, because while he's absolutely an asshole who deserves to be knocked down a peg, at least the narrative doesn't try to gaslight us into thinking he's a good person like it does with H x P. Zeus is a shithead but unapologetically authentic; Persephone and Hades both pretend like they're saints on earth (and the narrative tries to sell them to us as such) meanwhile they're constantly picking on lower class people and using their power and influence to get their way even when they haven't earned it.

But also yeah, it's funny how the fans will say "age doesn't matter when you're a god, time doesn't mean anything when you're immortal" to dismiss the massive age gap between Hades and Persephone, but then cry foul over Zeus keeping her in confinement for 10 years which is a pretty bare ass minimum sentence when you really think about it. Like, if the passage of time really is that inconsequential to a god, then how is 10 years even a punishment? It's only suddenly seen as a massively unfair punishment when it's Persephone who's suffering it.

[when-you-die-you-will-rot]

Last night me and ADAM (@.patchwork-and-paisley) listened to the new episode!! I'm gonna start posting my thoughts on the new ch&t episodes as they come out!!

Spoilers for the new episode ofc

First off, I love how the opening scene of season 2 mirrors the ending scene of season 1, with a chess game, and Lucille even says some of the same lines ("But don’t let it distract you from our game", "Don’t be distracted", etc)

Also, I think it was pretty funny when Lucille asked how they were and Jedidiah got so flustered and said "But we're, um, uh, nf6" Idk, that was just funny to me

Speaking of Jedidiah, something's been nagging at me for quite a while-- His new voice sounds familiar to me, but I can't figure out from where. And then it hit me: IS THIS A KIN MEMORY KIND OF THING????????

Also, this description made me go HDIHFISDOFHEWKLHRWK

Aaaanyway! I LOOOOVE all the callbacks to season 1 so far. "Yes, I must address the elephant in the room – not that one!", and "Let’s show some camp spirit, not… whatever the opposite of spirit is. Camp murder?", specifically.

When the flag of Camp Over Where was described, I immediately said, "Natsume drew that." And I kid you not, A SECOND LATER, Sydney said "I’m guessing Natsume drew this"! AND THIS ISNT THE FIRST TIME SOMETHING LIKE THIS HAS HAPPENED EITHER LOL. (Ask me about the time it happened with Gravity Falls if you wanna know more.)

When Sydney said that Jedidiah's great with hearts, I immediately went "No he's not." But when he clarified "anatomically", my JAW DROPPED. But what REALLY broke me was the line "He’s a pretty good guy to call if your heart ever stops." AND THE WAY THAT LINE WAS DELIVERED. THE TONE OF HIS VOICE. HEARTBREAKING. (pun not intended.)

SALMON INFEsTATION??? God, these salmon sound terrifying. CLAWS?? TUSKS?? WINGS?? FLUFFY TAILS?? ANTLERS?? I can see why "salmon" was put in quotes in the episode description. Those are NOT normal fish.

Also! "Beaks the size of centipedes" -- I guess we can check "centipede mention" off the bingo card haha. Right off the bat!

As soon as Sydney mentioned they were calling in extermination, I KNEW that the Super Slaughter Bros were gonna be the Tonies.

When Sydney said "when we die...................we rot" I went HE SAID IT HE SAID THE THING (I think I started bouncing around the room, too, haha.)

I can't help but notice that the Super Slaughter Bros were described as "copper-smelling"....... Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

NOT THE VOICE LEECHES

WHAT ARE SALMON PLIERS AND GOAT SWORDS?????

This is an incredibly trivial, very small detail, but the fact that Sydney's Joshua-imitating voice has changed ever so slightly is BOTHERING me for some reason

And no, pretty sure there are NOT any adults working at Camp Over Where.

HIGHLIGHTER SOUP SOUNDS DISGUSTING! Also, "Can't beat blue"... Blue Wolfe, I see you not-so-subtly calling yourself the best in your own podcast. (But in all seriousness, this got a good laugh out of me.)

AHA!!!! I KNEW it was the Tonies. ADAM can tell you that I totally called it. Also, I'm wondering if Tony 2 was affected by the voice leech spitballs that Camp Over Where unleashed upon the campsite... Maybe that's how they'll explain his voice change, too.

I think we all know who that letter is really from.... (ADAM got VERY excited listening to this part!)

While I think it's entirely possible that Adam lied about being the Camp Over Where director, wouldn't it be funny if he actually was? If anyone could find an actual demon to run their camp, it'd be Natsume. I wouldn't put it past him!

WHAT IS THE NEFARIOUS SHADOW SKULL?????

I am very concerned by Delightful Mystery Pudding Cup. Kids, I advise against eating Delightful Mystery Pudding Cup.

JEDDIE MAKES ME GO UUUUE😢😢🥺UE😭💧💧UEUE😢

I feel so bad for him but at the same time WHY IS HE LIKE THAT

It feels a liiiiiittle rude to me how he kinda yelled at Sydney. And I hate to say it, but I think I understand what Sydney said in the ghost recorder segment. Hopefully he'll get better though, right....?

.....right?????

Well, I guess all I can do is hope for the best.

That guy by the lake? Sounds suspiciously like..... micheal distortion from tma......

okay, but jokes aside, I think that's probably Adam. The way Sydney said "It felt kind of like a dream I had once" kind of confirms this suspicion, because the two of them originally met in dreams.

I decided to listen all the way to the end, since I am a patron and I wanted to see if my name made it into the credits.

When I heard "callmetroy" I actually freaked out because I KNOW THAT PERSON!!!! Well, I'm not sure if I'd say I know troy personally, but I've seen him around.

And then! I HEARD MY NAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UNFORTUNATELY SYDNEY IN ALMOST EVERY WAY IS ME!!!!!! THATS ME!!!!!!!!!!! When I heard that I REALLY freaked out, like, actually bouncing and flopping around the room. I did NOT know how to react!! It felt VERY special to hear myself thanked in the credits of this show that I love so dearly.

Also SHITNEY??? I don't know who that is but hearing that made me laugh (same with Juniper's Weirdly Long Neck)

AAAAANd I think that's all!!!! Now for the bingo card....

If you guys have any thoughts on this episode that you wanna share with me I'd love to hear them ^^ Thanks for listening to me ramble!

[blueberryarchive]

The Evergreen Game

The white pawn moves to E4.

"Pawn. E4." Jungkook swallows, sweat pooling on his temples and Cupid's bow.

"Pawn to E5." You murmur in a hiss, your legs trying to move, but Jungkook leans forward to move your chess piece. Your nails grab the hair at the back of his neck as you reposition yourself in his lap.

Jeon grabs your waist with his forearm so you won't fall, although he also feels that his body is going to betray him at any moment.

"Knight F3." Jungkook played after taking a breath, his cock feeling hot and completely covered in the viscous, milky liquid. He hadn't taken his cock out in an hour, and his dress pants, boots, and the floor were covered in his cum. Nasty, cold, and drying with the fall breeze. The scene was indecent.

"Knight to C6." You responded, holding your boyfriend's sweaty head so you could stand up.

"No, I'm not done yet. I have to win."

"It hurts, Kook. I can't anymore." As you moved further the liquid fell thickly onto the floor, making an obscene sound as you moaned. Your puffy lips were swollen from fucking too much, your insides reddened. But every time you moved ever-so-lightly it felt like scratching an itch, painful pleasure. "Let's play again later-"

"Bishop to C4." He interrupted, lifting your listless and tired body. You put your feet on tiptoe and moved on top of him again, the hair on his thighs sweating under your ass and your nipples gnawing at Jungkook's cashmere sweater.

You thought about your next move while he used you as a simple glove or toy.

"Hurry up or I'll go harder."

"You don't need to win."

"I do. Hurry up or I'll go harder." He repeated firmly.

Jungkook's mind wanted to focus on this round, he had an important game tomorrow; he could earn good money to pay for the apartment. But you offered him some gummies to which he just opened his mouth to chew them without thinking much.

Bad decision. In the first fifteen minutes, he felt his body warm up. Fifteen minutes later, you appeared completely naked in front of him.

An hour and a half and you no longer know how to count the times he has filled you until you were dripping wet and overflowing.

Half an hour ago, you asked for mercy, like a hypocrite. The fact that you thought it was going to end without your pussy being abused was just foolish.

"Bishop to C4?"

Jungkook left his painted hand on your right asscheek. You purred, biting your lips with delight, and curling your toes. 

"Think, pet. I need you to concentrate."

"C5, I- C5" You begged, moving with a little more energy, the cum lubricating your pain, pure bliss.

"Mhm. Keep moving like that. I'll let you go after this round.." Liar, you said to yourself while you hugged his neck. He held you tighter while he moved your black bishop.

"Pawn B4."

This game sounded familiar.

"Bishop to B4." You said, lifting your body even higher. The white pawn out.

"Pawn C3."

Jungkook didn't resist and kissed your neck for the umpteenth time that autumn afternoon. Your sweaty back under his hand moved, trembled, rose, and fell in short moans.

"Bishop A5."

"Bishop D4."

"Pawn to D4." Jungkook's index finger pushes the pawn to its new position, with that, you begin to groan as you shake the pieces with your hand on the table.

"Are we playing the Evergreen game?" You laughed breathlessly when you noticed how fast the game was going.

"Looks like we are." He smiled, revealing his dark eyes beneath the wet strands of his forehead. "You know what that means."

"You win at the end."

Jungkook growled before lifting you up and completely destroying the board until he placed your body on the table. Your breasts bounced with every hit and crash of him inside you.

"Koo, please, slow down. It hurts."

But he just couldn't. God, he wished he could because it hurt him too. But those pretty little cries that came out of your drooled and swollen lips didn't want him to stop filling you up.

"One more time."

"It'll burst out."

"I don't care, love. My floor and boots are already a fucking mess because of you."

You laughed through your tears. You loved seeing him so desperate.

Jungkook grabbed the queen and bishop between his fists before feeling how he filled you to abounding again.

And yet, after feeling himself almost faint and his legs spasming, he felt like he could win another round.

[t0ast-ghost]

I will not shut up about Star Trek TOS yet and you’ve decided to listen in on that. So welcome to my thoughts on the 11th episode (The Corbomite Maneuver):

- starting off strong with these camera angles and movements

- *sees a spinning colourful cube in space* just go a bit to the left (he is not up for shenanigans today)

- can’t wait for Checkov to be introduced, I hear he gets a gun or smt

- WHAT IS THAT PHYSICAL CHECK??? Why does he have to lie on his back?? And why does he have to have his shirt off?

- if I were Spock trying to call the captain and he picks up and all I’d see was his tits… all I’m saying is he keeps a really good straight face

- OMG we got a “what am I a moon shuttle conductor or a doctor?”

- Sulu laughing at Spock’s sense of humour

- the close up on Kirk’s ass as he leaves the room is so intentional

- Bones sitting on the railing…

- how many surfaces can I sit on competition but my opponent is Leonard Bones McCoy

- just to prove my point the next scene starts with him sitting on a table

- god I feel bad for Scotty having to sit between McCoy and Spock in some of those meetings

- Sulu was cool as a cucumber

- “do you ever tire of questioning me on things you’ve already made your mind up about?” “it gives me emotional security” they are each others emotional support guy (Spock & Kirk)

- Kirk saying“navigation, you’re timing was lousy. Same with engineering, Helmsman” then Bones immediately after “you’re timing was lousy”

- how can you sit in a chair like that even (bones)

- Alexa play tik tok by Kesha

- (okay now I’m just imagining Spock dancing like one of those spider-man memes but completely straight faced (also Spock now listens to Kesha canonically but like in my head))

- THE FUCK IS THAT FUCKING THING??? THAT IS A PUPPET!

- Bones is so caring, he has so much fucking compassion I won’t shut up about him

- “you now have seven minutes left” but there’s 23 minutes left in the episode. Guess a lot of it’s just gonna be dead air… er space I mean (yeah I can come up with a better line than this later (edit: no I can’t I’m tired))

- SPOCK IS SO SAD. He truly thinks this is a hopeless situation.

- Bones is about to die in four minutes and he’s threatening Kirk because of the fact that he put Bailey’s health at risk… I love this man

- “Anytime you can bluff me, doctor” I can’t legally say what I thought was said but maybe the ancient archaeologists will know from context clues

- I don’t think Uhura has spoken to most of the bridge crew up to this point, she barely has had plot or even dialogue, I can’t wait till they give her an episode or just even make her more central

- Spock going to Kirk’s side after the bluff for emotional support

- Spock is so proud when talking about his mom :)))

- Your science and medical officers usually shouldn’t stand so close to your chair and clutch at it while leaning over you. It’s not normal behaviour.

- Okay I’d like to mention how calm Sulu has been and how much I love him, can we please get more of him in future episodes?

- wait so Bones is just gonna let Bailey go back to work? Like I get they apologized to each other but that doesn’t change that it’s still a bad idea to have him there

- Spock, Kirk, and McCoy immediately after the death threat is gone: guess it’s time to start flirting again

[Video description: Spock stands on the bridge, he says, “A very interesting game, this poker.” Kirk sitting in his captains chair replies, “It does have advantages over chess.” McCoy smiling at Spock adds, “Love to teach it to you.” Spock smiles back at him. End description]

- he’s got a twinkle in his eye

- The shake on the bridge as the tractor beam tows them is so funny if you watch Spock and McCoy (it continues to be funny for the next couple minutes)

- "Captain request to-" "Denied. If it's a trap.. If I'm wrong, I want you here" awwe he wants him safe (idc that this is not what the writers are trying to say, HE WANTS SPOCK SAFE)

- they all have to bend over on the transporter pad but when they get transported Bones isn't even bent he's just standing at his normal height slightly hunched

- HOLY CRAP I HATE THAT THING... I'm so glad it's a puppet

- nope okay I don't know what's happening, I can't. I'm. What.

- that is apple cider, they are sitting around this guy trying to drink apple cider

- McCoy doesn't know what the fuck to do right now and neither do I

Now imagine, if you will, Spock dancing

Thank you, and have a good day.

Master post of past/future episodes

[goldentlme]

i’m searching for you in my fading memories .

alternate versions .

whooh . WHOOH !!!!! good GOD !!!!

listen to the song linked while looking I think it really adds . look up a translation too if you want ! listen to the entire lies of p ost in fact . its fucking fantastic .

NOTES .

in april 2022 , i drew a fanmade book cover for the danganronpa x reader fic Sleep Awake . in december of 2023 i redesigned my reader for that story for the third time and thought it appropriate to redraw that old cover with their new design . and yesterday , january 13th 2024 , i finished that bitch . View the fruits of my labour .

in my last Notes section i talked about nerfing the lighting . well um . i nerfed it again . i dont know if it was fate or if i just . idk . didnt want to but i axed both original concepts - the yellow overhead light ( mostly) , and the light blue under light - and just Winged the fuck outta it . that ' mostly ' means that the light source is Still overhead but i just took the colour out to make it more neutral .

another thing i brought up were the shelves and how i wanted to add more items to them . I did it this time , but not to the extent that i really wanted to . i'd hoped for more Clutter and ultimately couldnt think of anymore than a few items . SAID ITEMS BEING !!!!

the pills . self explanatory , since they haunted the majority of cases 2 and 3 .

chess pieces . cute little reference to the chess scene ! even if the scene itself didnt feature real chess pieces , the imagery wouldnt work if i didnt use real pieces .

the letter opener . dont need to explain this one . but i Did originally plan to have it in shin's hand ( explaining why that one is balled like that , because there was originally a Thing in there ) but i couldnt figure out how to draw it and make it look Good . i only added it back when i was colouring the trinkets on the shelves and realised that i Forgot to put it back into the drawing .

the joker card in the bottom corner . also shouldnt have to explain this one .

LITTLE DETAILS I THINK YOU SHOULD LOOK AT .

THE HANDS !!!!!!!!! i decided at the very last second to make them vaguely see through . and theyre all a persons ! amami and shinguji are the obvious ones , but the two holding at the top are supposed to be ouma ( on the scarf ) and akamatsu ( on the rope ) . i would have included tojo's as well but i couldnt fit it in the composition without it looking awkward and out of place and i thought there were already enough references to case 3 as is .

and you literally cant even see it but if you look REALLY closely at oumas hand . his skin is a little grey and you can see the veins through the skin . wonder what happened there . Guess we'll never know !

THE BOOKS !! did the same thing as last time with a Little More . purple books are ouma , green are both amami and tojo , blue is both kiibo and chabashira , pink is akamatsu , and red is phys themselves . i know phys's canonical colour association is olive green but consider : shin is red . look at him . hes Red . that ones for me specifically .

with that . i did all of those books by hand . i drew about 9 variations of books and copy pasted them sure but i Shaded and Coloured them all individually . youll never guess how fucking LONG that took . so yeah . no one book has the exact same shading . goodie !

THE JOKER !!! yes i know i talked about it in the previous section but i WILL talk about the card itself . because i unironically am so in love with how that drawing came out . the little guy featured there is my Lies of P oc scaramouche or scaramuccia ( i use them interchangeably ) . hes a silly jester :3 . the depiction on the card is of him in his prime , before . All Of That Happened . story-wise he's a super famous circus performer known as " The One Man Show " because all of his acts are done alone and are absolutely insane . hes very good at what he does which is Why he doesnt have a crew . and the only reason hes so good is because he't not even human , just pretending to be !

additionally , i originally planned for that joker card to be a Real Life Joker . because a little known fun fact about me is that i collect playing card decks ! but i looked and literally NONE of the ones i currently own would have fit the piece . so . yeah . i just ended up drawing darling scaramuccia . heres the full image im so chuffed

i think thats all i got for the drawing itself . i initially started this back in early december but got stuck and picked it back up a couple days ago , so its been marinating for a bit . hope we all like it ! i think its Better than the original . THE SERIOUS STUFF .

its so fucking insane to think that its been almost 2 years . not only have i truly rediscovered my love of reader insert fanfiction after so many years unable to even think about it without feeling a little sick to my stomach , but ive made so many good friends and core memories through this fic . i even got back into writing . literally never thought id write again after my 11th grade english class and my 10th grade creative writing class . and im having FUN with it . wild .

anyways , this one goes out to vee @chihirolovebot for writing one of The Fics of all time , putting up with my insane ramblings about idol these past months ( READ SWINGING RIGHT NEOWWWW ) , and for letting me help design their dnd characters . godspeed .

it goes out to nex @nexuswrites for beating better genshin character builds into me , giving great fic recommendations , creating thief of detectives quandary fame . READ DQ ( THREAT ) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! , and being a fellow p5 and pokemon lover . i miss the coordinator and justice

and of COURSE !!!! rei @berry-creates . the gay the myth the legend . a fellow oc haver and lover , a fantastic writer , and an overall lovely person . this one goes out to u for sharing oc playlists , playing splatoon with me , and for creating maddie . theyre a little freak and i want to study them . i love seeing u go insane over them its like enrichment for me bc i too am also a little mentally ill about them im just really good at hiding it .

theres a whole lot more i could say and more people i could talk about but this is long enough , isnt it ?

thanks for a beautiful 2 years of physouma yaoi . heres to the upcoming sleep awake case 6 , epilogue , all the future additions to the one shot book , the entire rest of dq , tfp , and sams , and more blorbos to put in the smoothie maker . this took a whole two hours to write .

cheers , boys .

song of the post .

[here-for-the-vibe]

don't have to answer but i was just curious: i was wondering what you thought abt ron's portrayal in the hp movies? cuz i read your intro and i know i have opinions as someone who's not a big fan, so i'm assuming you DEFINITELY have some lmao

Many many MANY thanks for this ask because I have been waiting for someone to ask me this!!

Firstly, I’d like to preface both by saying that the movies weren’t that bad and that I barely remember them. Secondly I’d like to say that they could’ve been a HELL of a lot better in MANY areas. This is a Ron post so I’ll try to stay on topic but I have thoughts on the (several) other things the movies did wrong as well so that may bleed in.

Book One: not a whole lot stands out in my memory here in terms of “ways they fucked Ron over,” but imo there were little things, like his skill at chess or his compassion, that were downplayed quite a bit. That one scene where he destroys Harry in chess being deleted pissed me off.

Book Two: things start to get more interesting here, he was the one who knew what Parseltongue was while the other two didn’t, but in the movies, while he does know what it is, it’s made Hermione’s moment, which is something they love doing from here on out. Also the books made sure to point out how upset Hermione’s petrification made him, how it made him brave enough to follow the spiders. Not to mention his fierce defense of Harry during the Heir of Slytherin debacle. And was that made apparent in the movies? Nope, downplayed to hell once again.

Book Three: And so the bullshit increases, and so does my blood pressure. I literally don’t remember any of this movie but still imma need to pull out a list for this one:

The scene where Snape is the DADA sub… OH my god. In the books, when Snape is making fun of Hermione, he responds with something like “She asked you a question! Why ask if you don’t want an answer?” And in the movies….. he…… agrees with Snape….

The ENTIRE Shack scene, fucking WHY?

He spends literally the entire book being the only one to notice when Hermione randomly appears and disappears, yet in the movies he’s oblivious nearly the entire time? Really?

For some reason I can’t recall anything related to the Crookshanks and Firebolt situations, though I do remember that they removed the whole “Crookshanks trying to kill Scabbers as soon as they meet” thing even though it’s a. essential foreshadowing and b. literally justified why Ron was such an asshole about it afterwards. Can you blame him when that was the FIRST interaction?

Books 4-7: I fear all of my thoughts will blend together in one big ball of insurmountable outrage if I I try to explain these one by one so we’re tackling some major issues at once:

His good scenes ALL GET DELETED. The ones where he’s checking up on Harry? Off they go. The ones where he’s being genuinely knowledgeable? Say goodbye! They removed all of his good moments and wonder why everyone believes him to be a clueless asshole

The fight in the tent: are you kidding me? The movies made it look like he left out of some fit of romantic jealousy and being a broody asshole! There was an actual reason!!! He’d just found out from Phineas Nigellus that Ginny (and Neville and Luna) had been given detention in the Forest for stealing the sword and Ron thought the other two were being way too lax about it. The argument started because he was scared for his sister’s safety!!!!

There are a million other instances of him having genuine reasons for feeling or acting a certain way, but the movies will include those odd behaviors and not the reasons

revisiting the “his good moments get removed” thing to ask a quick question: did his being a prefect ever get mentioned? Ever?

There are So Many Other Things I could’ve said here but I’m out of energy so, once again thanks for the ask! I’ll fight the movies they fucked up my boy.

[thegeminisage]

oh IT'S fucking star trek update time. last night we watched "improbable cause" and "the die is cast" and MWAH CHEFS KISS WHAT AN EVENING.

improbable cause:

GOING INTO THIS. i knew odo got tortured by garak. so as you can imagine i was quite beside myself because i like both of them so much. but whatever direction i was expecting that to go this was not it

firstly i love the idea that julian and garak get into these heated literature conversations and julian values it so much he has to have obrien replace garak when he's gone. i don't think obrien did a very good job...considering all the racketball julian has doggedly put in while keiko was away he should have stepped up!!

secondly please don't say caesar. it was a good setup for garak's dramatic irony later though.

delavian chocolate gift and giftback. girl what on earth was that. GAY PEOPLE.

from garak and odo's first scene together i was like damn...they're both so good at picking up on tiny cues and analyzing people...they're both so smart...this is crazy...i had no idea. side bar i love that in that scene odo was like if kira wanted you dead you would fucking be dead. so true. support your woman

cry wolf story. "never tell the same lie twice." AAAGHGHGHGH IT'S ALL TRUE ESPECIALLY THE LIES

THE FACT THAT. ODO PUT TOGETHER GARAK BOMBING HIS OWN SHOP. like i NEVER would have figured that out he is SO smart. AND him knowing for sure garak had no idea why the romulans were trying to kill him!! god garak and odo really are unstoppable force immovable object. it's like L and light except better. i can't believe i didn't see the potential of trapping them in a room together until now

the parallel of garak insisting on going with odo and then odo insisting going with garak...except the first time it turned out to be nothing and the second time they both regretted it

odo's shot at the romulan uniforms lol. he didn't like those 80s shoulderpads

odo's SHADY dealings with that cardassian...odo has such a checkered history considering his circumstances. also, the next person who mentions that cardassian neck thing i am going to jump thru my computer and kill them in real life

i cant believe also that tain was gonna kill his fucking housekeeper...justice for housekeepers. also, justice for garak, who looked like he hade that promise at gunpoint but alsmot died trying to keep it

GARAK TELLING JULIAN TO EAT THE ROD. really really really funny. i kind of wish there HAD been a rod back there specifically so we COULD see julian eat it.

ODO AND GARAK PSYCHOANALYZING EACH OTHER NO HOLDS BARRED TOTAL BEATDOWN

hi good morning hello hi. hello. they were playing verbal chess. defensive and offensive moves. odo is at a slight disadvantage here because he's incredibly frank and garak has 100 layers minimum to everything he's ever said but their skills at reading one another are perfectly parallel and their hesitation to rip each other apart is 0. there was bloodshed. it was delicious

AND YOU KNOW WHAT. MAYBE THIS EPISODE WAS A LITTLE BIT ABOUT KIRA

"is there one person just one in this whole universe that you care for" and if a telepath had been in the room the name KIRA would have been shouted in flashing lights and all capital letters at 100db. it was on his face. you could SEE IT

and i MAINTAIN that if garak saw them speak even two words to each other about something besides work he would figure it out instantly. he's just not around kira that much because of how forcefully she projects her incredibly intimidating disapproval.

the bit about the racial slur for the romulans. firstly, it WAS smart, secondly, it was also funny, because right before tain pointed it out i was like damn that's a slur

garak already smiling when odo is trying to talk him out of rejoining the order. most terrifying way ever to end an episode when i know he's getting tortured later

the die is cast:

and in literally the FIRST SCENE after the switch what is garak doing? panicking. tain is like, yeah i'm gonna kill that housekeeper you love and garak immediately wants to protest and then he immediately freaks out about wanting to protest. i can't believe you can see it all on his face under all that makeup...

sisko LITERALLY choosing to disobey orders to go get One Guy. picard would have let his ass die. and it means so much to me because 1. he got a message and wryly told kira to disregard it 2. if he AHDN'T been there odo and garak would have died. like, he got there in JUST the nick of time 3. him stopping obrien from knocking out the traitor but warning that guy "i'd stay away from o'brien if i was you" lmaooo 4. "we're gonna get singed at that range" "not as singed as they're gonna get, ENGAGE" nobody has ever served like sisko serves. he's so FUCKING cool, dude, i can't get over how great he is

the torture scenes were just like the psychoanalyzing scenes except this time there was actual violence involved, even though they never touched each other. "the only common enemy we share is tain the difference is you don't know it" caesarcore unfortunately. garak trying to wiggle out of it and then realizing this is the price of admission if he wants back in. knowing odo is hiding something because it's what HE would do and they are BASICALLY THE SAME GUY. odo's sarcasm ("oh nooo mister garak pleeease don't torture me have mercy 🙄") turning to annoyance to fear to RAGE. AUGHGHGHG

like, it's exactly like that one scene in atla where zuko is talking to iroh in prison but the bars are only visible around zuko's face. odo is spitting such venom at garak that HE IS ALSO BEING TORTURED. garak didn't realize until tain talked about killing his housekeeper that he didn't have the stomach for it anymore but odo knew from the very beginning. odo never asked garak to make it stop GARAK BEGGED ODO TO MAKE IT STOP. LIKE ARE YOU KIDDING ME

"tell me something anything lie if you have to but say it PLEASE" like ARE. YOU. KIDDING ME

only odo could walk into a torture chamber and have the torturer begging for it to stop and only garak could start torturing someone and then beg them to break. SAME GUY. it was PERFECT. whatever way i imagined this was bad and wrong and less stellar than what they actually did, which was FUCKING insane

and then after all that the secret just being a personal one. not useful at all. "i hope it was worth it" and odo slides into the bucket and garak puts his head in his fucking hands. MWAH

AND THEN LATER. SAYING ODO NEVER BROKE. and it's kind of a lie but it's also kind of true because odo didn't break FIRST. garak did. you could imagine odo broke because garak begged him or because he couldn't take anymore but in every sense that matters he outlasted his torturer.

garak almost dying to save the world's worst guy <3 like he really promised that housekeeper. he definitely deserved the black eye odo gave him in the sense that he deserved some pain back but in another way didn't deserve the compassion behind it because anyone else in odo's position would be tempted to let him die. so much for "odo doesn't have feelings" ie garak's earlier hypothesis. like the way in the shuttle he says later you know i get it i too want to go home (and unsaid: but i can't stomach the people who live there and what they do and what they stand for even though i miss them horribly). THEY ARE THE SAME GUY. i loved their little last-minute goodbye int he shuttle and then sisko's unexpected rescue. WOW what a sequence!

the changelings would take odo in a heartbeat and STILL he says no because he loves the people he's surrounded himself with :( <3 ESPECIALLY KIRAAA

loved the plot twist of the romulan changeling btw. "no changeling has ever harmed another" i really really really hope odo is the first. ik it would make him sad but it would make ME so happy

and then. of course. the final scene. tng would never do this. tng would have them rescued, they'd nod at one another, the credits would roll. but the mirror scene...

like, i expected garak to look at himself, you know? like damn who am i what have i become i was miserable when i went back and i'm miserable here

BUT IN THE REFLECTION WAS ODO. SAME GUY

the sheer amount of nerve it took not to show odo's face for this...to have odo a blurred silhouetted refection and to keep the camera on garak...nobody's pussy pops like ds9's does.

AND ODO JUST. 1. INVITES HIM TO REBUILD 2. INVITES HIM TO BREAKFAST???

CONSTABLE I THOUGHT YOU DIDN'T EAT I DON'T

HE DOESN'T EAT. BUT HE WANTS TO GET BREAKFAST.

these two men literally saw each other break and realized they're the same guy and now they're gonna get BREAKFAST. i'm gonna kerm

i was forseeing odo hating garak for the rest of the series. lifelong enemies. etcetc. i was NOT predicting garak breaking first and odo forgiving him because he understands and then they start a fucking BRUNCH CLUB??? where they don't talk about kira

10/10 episodes and experiences. like, hit me with that holodeck shit next time, who cares. i am fucking invincible.

TONIGHT: voy's "faces" and ds9's "explorers," though i sadly realized just a little while ago that the source i used for my airdates for this spreadsheet was not good...possibly we have been watching them ever so slightly out of order for some time...i'll have to check the true extent of the damage later tonight.

[yurisorcerer]

pbptptpbptptptpbpbpbptptptptptpppppbpbpbhph.

Okay.

So! Code Geass: Lelouch of the Re;surrection, huh? Took me five years to get to it. I do not know what I expected. This was not nearly as bad as I feared but also not as good as I hoped. I guess I'd say it's good as a movie for huge Code Geass fans, but it also kind of walks back some of the core ideas of Code Geass as a series, so Hm.

Like, ok, let's just start with the premise. The very idea of Lelouch coming back to life after the end of the series (or rather the alternate continuity to the series as presented by the Lelouch of the Rebellion compilation movies), is already a bit wonky. If Code Geass works on any level *thematically,* it's because Lelouch, as the 99th Emperor Britannia, dies. He dies not because it's necessarily the right thing to happen to him *morally,* but because he knows he has so much blood on his hands that he can't live with himself. It's suicide-by-Suzaku. That's how the original series ends.

Here, of course, he is just back. In of itself, that would be fine, but everyone is SO accepting of it SO quickly. There's a couple quick scenes of Kallen crying over him and Suzaku beating the ever-loving shit out of him (he deserves worse honestly), but for the most part everyone is completely happy to start taking orders from History's Greatest Monster again. With some of these people, like Cornelia and even his own sister Nunally, this kind of strains credulity. Especially with how the latter goes out of her way to exonerate Lelouch of any wrongdoing and blames herself for not truly understanding her brother's motives. I'm sorry, like, I've seen the show. That's just kind of bullshit. Lelouch's motives were *extremely* selfish and the fact that he never told Nunnally what he was up to was kind of the whole point, he didn't respect her as an equal, and just thought of her as someone he needed to protect. Due to, you know, pick one; misogyny, a generally privileged upbringing that may have rubbed some concept of noblesse oblige into him, ableism, the fact that he's a smug bastard who assumes he knows better than everyone, etc.

The unfortunate thing about the movie, though, is that Lelouch Lamperouge is cool as shit and it's really fun to watch him do anything.

Where it gets brought back, at least for me, in spite of all these flaws, is that I do just pop when Lelouch is on-screen Doing His Thing. C.C. has a fantastic little exchange with him when he gets discouraged late in the film where she talks about how she wants to see the arrogant, unwavering Lelouch. That's a good moment and it's pretty in keeping with their relationship, but it's also a sly nod toward the fourth wall I'm pretty sure. Unfortunately, to some extent, I will just watch this fucking bastard with his fucking hair and his fucking cloak and mask and his fucking violet shoujo manga-ass eyes and his fucking fruity little hand gestures whenever he talks, play everyone like a fiddle yet again while making grand pronouncements and saying "checkmate" unironically when he's got someone cornered even though no one has ever played a game of chess on-screen in Code Geass that made a lick of sense.

There are certain characters that just have such unreal amounts of charisma that watching them do basically anything is fun. (The voice acting in this thing is magnificent, of course, and helps sell that. I'd listen to Fukuyama Jun read a phone book.) Lelouch is one of those. If I'm any Code Geass character in spirit, it's Tamaki. Any time Lelouch puts on the Zero mask I scream and point at the screen and go "that's my man right there!!" like we're close personal friends or something. It's a disease, and I have to live with it. God forbid I ever get super into UC Gundam, I don't know WHAT I'd do if I ended up being like this about Char.

Everyone else returning from Code Geass proper has at least one really good moment, too. Kallen, Suzaku, and C.C. predictably get the best of them and the new characters that are introduced as their antagonists are, at least, very strong. The way the middle east is portrayed in this movie is WILD problematic, but a side effect of how Code Geass tends to write its antagonists is that at the very least the antagonist characters here have actual, like, human motives, and Lelouch's opposite number Shamna is a worthy foe; he does of course beat her but it's really down to the wire. Lot of good mecha fights in here, too, with Kallen and Suzaku both getting a lot of good screentime doing what they do best. There's more CGI than I'd like (CGI can work very well in a mecha anime IF the mecha are designed for it, but Code Geass' largely were not and you can tell), but not enough that it saps the movie of its dynamism, so, full marks there.

And then there's the ending of the movie which, hmmm. Basically, indirectly, the film makes C.C. x Lelouch canon, and in the postscript they seem to have formed a Geass Master power couple (complete with a very sharp gothic lolita look for C.C. that is absolutely fabulous. Lelouch's new outfit in that sequence is pretty snazzy too). I know Suzululu was always the more popular pairing (at least I've always gotten that impression), but I think this actually mostly makes sense, and I think they look good together. OTOH, Lelouch---sorry, he's going by L.L. now---seems like the sort of person who has a lot of different people in his life without necessarily being *totally* bound to any one of them. Maybe that's my own polyamory coloring the text, but it didn't feel exclusionary to me.

Anyway, yeah. Kind of betrays the spirit of the original a little bit but as far as being essentially a fun fanservice movie it was pretty good. They're making more, I'll probably watch those, too, especially if Lelouch continues to be cunty in them.

[e-adlirez]

Seen your answer about your favorite moments for each of the thea sisters in the special editions, so how about your favorites thea sisters moments in the main series? And also which one is your favorite book from the main series?

MMMNNNHHHH

Okay so uhhh hmmm the last six books in the old artstyle are the ones I say where Thea Stilton peaked in adventure content (those being Old Castle, Blue Scarab Hunt, Prince's Emerald, Dancing Shadows, Orient Express, and Legend of the Fireflowers). Personally, I often flip back and forth between Old Castle, Blue Scarab Hunt, and Orient Express being my favorites because I have a soft spot for the first two (they were the first books I read in the series) and Orient Express is just goated in general

Orient Express is my current favorite, but expect it to change

OKAY FAVORITE MOMENTS, once again splitting it with lighthearted/dialogue moments, and important key moments in the plot

Lighthearted/dialogue moments:

Colette - Her literally becoming the embodiment of those cartoon characters yeeting their entire wardrobe over their head because they can't figure out what to wear for the occasion (Great Tulip Heist)

Nicky - That one time she made a dig at Violet because she slept in so hard that it made the girls late to their tournament day 1 (Roman Holiday)

Pam - When she called Ashvin the kid-friendly version of "a hot f#$kin' mess" (Ice Treasure)

Paulina - Her having to take a lotta copium from not having her phone or tablet with her in the jungle (Madagascar Madness)(I felt so called out ;w;)

Violet - Tie between the time she dunked on Enrico Mousetti's classist ass (Dancing Shadows) and "Well, in that case, we'd like to visit the castle while it's still standing." (Secret of the Old Castle)

Plot moments:

Colette - The time she did the classic "hot woman walks into the hallway" thing in Mystery in Paris

Nicky - THAT ONE TIME SHE CLIMBED ON TOP OF AND JUMPED OFF A SPEEDING FIRETRUCK (Big Trouble in the Big Apple)(I know she scaled a train in Orient Express, but this scene felt more badass)

Pam - Any and all chase scenes where she was driving ngl, woman carried (off the top of my head I can remember Blue Scarab Hunt and Prince's Emerald)

Paulina - Prince's Emerald, woman carried that book on her back and we love it, I hope she got a long, hot shower after that

Violet - Either the moment she figured out the giant boulder riddle in Blue Scarab Hunt, the time she big-brained the crap out of the mystery and told the girls that Fadhili was the traitor in Lion's Den, or uh the belowdeck scene in Ghost of the Shipwreck (I'm convinced that that was the moment that cemented Violet as my blorbo for second grade me), honorable mention goes to Violet tying a chess metaphor into the villain's strategy in Orient Express, said metaphor becoming the key to realizing what the villain was up to

Notice how the last six books appeared semi-frequently in my rankings? That's how goated they are :]

Honorable mention for a uh a scene in general is a scene between Vi and Paulina in Orient Express:

"Ohmygodohmygodohmygod it's Zelda Mitoff :DDDDD"

"Yeah but good god her secretary's an idiot, he forgot one whole trunk in the luggage count"

".... bish you just saw the ballerina equivalent of Whitney Houston pass by and all you could think about was b o x e s ?"

I dunno if the Whitney Houston analogy makes sense but you get what I mean, that's peak fangirl right there, you love to see it

Anyway hope that answers your question, now I'm gonna wait cutely for ya'll to read the Treasure Seekers because it's really good (besides the power of friendship stuff), okay byeeeeeeee

[summercourtship]

Damn…. favorite scene???? That’s such a hard question! Honestly… I love all scenes with each individual character, there were definitely some more iconic than others but an all time favorite is SO hard to pick (bcs you write them so well is hard to “pick” one ““better”” then other) but here are some off my “favorites”:

Edward: Chess scene, when he said: “I noticed you” and the reader “hugs” him and he is like: “Omg i can’t believe this is happening!! a woman is touching me”, when he gets sad when she didn’t want a cigarette bcs he wanted to indirectly kiss her lol, and the breakout in arkham that was a fun chapter!

Jonathan: This is underrated but… I loved their first kiss! Her continuing to talk while they kiss and him just telling her to shut up is so funny, THE GALA OMG!!!! I am going to say that this hole chapter was TOP TIER!!! them making out in the corridor (btw what did she hear that night?) HIS HAND ON HER THIGH????!!! Omg!!! all of those were SO GOOD!!! And when she came back from the halloween party and he was in her apartment. (we all know what i mean from that, the smut, i’m talking about the smut) ALSO!!!! When he confronted her in the basement!!! that scene was SO SCARY!!

Bruce/Batman: They dancing in the gala, specifically when Bruce says: “enjoying the scenery” (GOD! i could SEE his “Bruce Wayne” smirk creeping up his face), literally any time that they rode a motorcycle, i’m not even joking, i live for things like that, when they are at the beach just enjoying the view, Him letting the reader look at his childhood photos, their first “real” kiss at the bat signal!!!! aaaaaanddd every time Bruce said a variation of: “we’re in this together” (you got me giggling and kicking my feet, no joke)

Thanks for reading kyra! so sorry if some frases seem hard to read or just wrong! english isn’t my first language!!! Keep uo the good work girl!!! you can don this!!!

thank you!! and don't worry about your english, it's good!

Edward: I have to say- I think that Edward's scenes are some of my favorite in the fic, just in general. Which is crazy because I certainly hadn't intended on that being the case when I started writing. I just ended up really liking writing him. All of his part in Ch. 12 is probably near the top of my list for my favorite scenes....

Jonathan: I LOVE THEIR FIRST KISS SCENE!!!!! I remember being kinda sad when I first uploaded that chapter because NO ONE commented on that scene (and even a year after it was originally uploaded, it's a scene I'm very surprised people haven't talked to me about more- but then again, a lot of the earlier Jonathan scenes don't get brought up as much) and I was so scared I had disappointed people somehow.... glad to hear it stuck around in someone's mind!!

Bruce: To the anon who sent me the original biker bruce message: thank you so much for your contribution to STBOTDI canon. also I love their first (real) kiss scene so much (I think I'm just a sucker for dramatic first kisses..... hmm.) Kissing in the rain >>>

ALSO OKAY, this was gonna be revealed in an alternate POV but I have no idea when I'll get started on those again SOOO during the Sponsorship Gala, what the reader heard was actually Bruce. I imagine he was kinda keeping tabs on her (and Jonathan) the entire night because the only reason he attended at all was to scope out Jonathan in the first place. How much he saw.... well, you can decide for yourselves that.

[concealeddarkness13]

OC In Fifteen

Content warning for mention of rape and some suggestive themes. I was tagged by @drabbleitout (also, I'd like to re-tag you to do this for Ives)! Thanks so much! I'm tagging @ratracechronicler, @maple-writes, @pen-of-roses, and @grailfish if you'd like to do this!

Rules: Share 15 or fewer lines of dialogue from an OC, ideally lines that capture the character/personality/vibe of the OC. Bonus points for just using the dialogue without other details about the scene, but you're free to include those as well!

You know who I'm gonna do this for. My girl, Chess! The first four are from the canon story, and the rest are from AUs!

“I’m supposed to be recovering. I think you getting close to me with your creepy doctor instruments is the opposite of that.”

“This is bullshit, and even if it was true, I couldn’t care less because I don’t want to know about my past. I might be similar to who I was before, and I might even have the same personality, but no one from my past fucking knows me anymore, and if you want to try to pretend that you do, you can leave my room right now. I’m not interested.”

"I’m willing to learn more about you, but I can’t afford to trust people, so don’t go expecting me to fall at your feet and beg you to fuck me.”

“I don’t need your damn pity. What, does it make you feel better to give me your fucking pity, like I’m a starved animal and you just hand me damn plastic to eat?”

“I can assure you, I’m no sign from the gods. They don’t like me either.”

“I am not a monster. I am not less than human. You ruined my life, so now I’m going to ruin yours.”

“Oh, hun, I’m sure you both wish to have a good time with me tonight, but I couldn’t be more turned off by this. And if you insist, I’ll make sure to let everyone know how needy you two are.”

“Don’t you fucking dare pity me! I’m not a weak and fragile thing that needs protecting! I will grow strong so I can protect myself! You won’t be able to take advantage of me!”

“I can’t imagine going back to how it was before. Please. I don’t want you to leave.”

“I’m a monster, you can now see that yourself. I don’t deserve kind touch. I deserve pain and possessiveness and anger. I’ve hurt you. Hurt me back.”

“Please don’t promise you’ll protect me. I’d much rather you promise you won’t leave me. At least not without giving me a chance to fix myself and become better.”

“And if not…if you aren’t going to leave, if you don’t want to hurt me, where the fuck were you for all these years? Where were you when I got experimented on? Or raped? Or called a monster? Where the fuck were you? Why do you show up now, when it’s already too late? When I’m already too broken, too fucking used to being discarded to trust this now? Why the fuck weren’t you there sooner?”

“I’m not impressed. 0/10. You’re too much of a gloater. I’ve seen scarier villains than you.”

"...I know where I’m gonna shove that patience. Without lube too.”

“Fuck you!”

[galindatopland]

ok a few episodes at once now:

17 Proteus:

finch casually mentioning a pilot’s license and having plausible meteorology equipment. on brand.

i liked the deputy lady who could not be bothered to help finch and reese. felt like when you have a job and you need to get it done right so you call a lesbian.

this among us ass episode….

the dialogue between finch and the killer about living as other people was really interesting. “I do those identities justice” and “one day I’ll find the right identity and keep it” were crazy quotes

18 All In

leon again?????

“you plan to kill me?” “probably” was a good exchange

i love how many different bird themed last names harold has locked and loaded

tbh i was not very into this episode. also i get that carter is having her own story arc but i miss seeing her in action

19 Trojan Horse

SHAW IS BACK 😍😍😍

i do enjoy watching finch get to use his computer knowledge when undercover and spout jargon at people

also a fan of the elias chess scenes

so shaw is going to go find root? 👀 i am looking.

i’m sad that cal died (mostly bc carter deserves something to go right for her) but i wish we got more characterization on him other than “oh he’s mixed up in hr stuff and is shady despite seeming to be a nice guy”

mmmmmm i agree. not much more i can say about those eps either tbh except YOU THINK I NEED A HOBBY HAROLD? I THINK I JUST FOUND ONE. god what a scene. can't even think of it rly why is shaw so unbearably attractive in absolutely everything she does. anyways. "a friend once told me in our line of work we walk in the dark. doesn't mean we have to walk in it alone" is like. in my top 10 fave poi quotes i think of it so often. also top 10 might not sound impressive but in my defense there are a lot of poi quotes i love

[zepskies]

Me seeing your gif choice:

His eyes might’ve been on the pool game, but he was playing chess in his mind.

What a line. Like, holy shit.

Ooh thank you, lovely! Daniel's a player. He's seeing all the moves in his mind.

That exchange was ominous as hell, and also intriguing...

🤐 All I can say is, you'll see next Friday. lol

Eileen! So happy to have her in this chapter. I loved that she and the reader were bonding. ("So too old" was hilarious, by the way.) And Eileen and Dean's relationship is super-sweet. Her offering him a cookie, and him signing "thank you" in response? Staaaahp. <3

Thank you so much for calling the moments with Eileen (and her little moment with Dean), because I really enjoyed including more of her in this chapter. 💕

Hot biscuits, he put on a leather jacket. Okay...

Everything about her new car felt so right. Her being incredibly grateful, but also refusing to accept it without partially paying Dean back. Dean's dedication to the project and his glee--his "dancing" eyes!!--while presenting it to her. Bobby being a big, ol' softie and making sure Dean got a good deal, along with all the parts he needed. [Chef's kiss]

Aww I'm so glad you enjoyed that scene as well. 🥹 Dean's been doing a lot for her, and she's so independent, I thought it was only right that she try to pay for at least half of it.

I was so glad she got to hear everyone praise her cooking/baking skills at Christmas dinner. She deserved that. It was a nice little nudge for a brighter future for her. <3 I liked that Dean, once again, gently, but pointedly commented about her opening a place of her own. And Sam jumping in to help her with a loan warmed me.

Yesss I'm happy you liked this tidbit; I'm leading to something with that, believe me. 💗

John seeing that she is good for his son was such an important inclusion. And being the "anchor tethering [Dean] to dry land"? What an honor that'd, honestly. <3

I really liked getting into John's head a little bit in that moment. I think he needed to be humanized a bit lol, but also for us to see how he sees his sons, and how he sees the women in their lives. 💕

↪️Especially important after he sees how the reader holds her ground against him.

Her having a Plan™ for Dean. Hoooo, boy.

...you were also a caring person, who tried to take care of him. Dean hadn’t really had that…from anyone before.

The mix of comfort and pain here--it really was Christmas for me. xD&lt;3

This was the chapter where I realized I had created a reader who actually shared a lot of similar character traits with Dean: stubborn, loyal, caretaking, independent to the point of character flaw at times, etc. 😂 And yet those are traits that they still appreciate in each other.

You encouraged him to lie on his stomach in the middle of the bed, so you could start on his back. Your hands glided down planes of muscle and smooth slopes while you straddled his thighs.

jesus christ

Lmfaoo writing the massage scene was fun for me. 😏

“I love you, you know?” you said. He smiled. “I’ve got some idea, yeah.”

Okay. All right. This is some of the best romantic shit (complimentary) I have ever heard. Like, a rom-com could never. Elite.

UGHHHH you don't know how much that warms me, God. 🥰🥰 When it comes to romance, I try very hard not to create "Hallmark" cheesy moments or cliches, but something that might stick in your mind, like the truly classic rom-coms often do. They leave you with a line that becomes iconic.

A la:

You've Got Mail: "I wanted it to be you. I wanted it to be you so badly."

He's Just Not That Into You: "You are my exception."

As Good As It Gets: "You make me want to be a better man."

Bridgett Jones's Diary: "I like you very much, just as you are."

Love Actually: "To me, you are perfect."

And while I am not as domestic as these two's future is looking, their discussion was adorable. <3

Haha I was going canon season 3-6 Dean-esque on this one. He wanted a family so damn bad, and I'll never forgive the show writers for not giving that to him. 🥲

Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with me, as always, hun!! I so appreciate you. 💕

Smoke Eater - Part 15

Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader 

Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but he’s also known to break a few hearts. He’s starting to crave something he’s never had, though. Something stable. Something real. 

That’s when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.   

AN: Thank you as always for the lovely responses on the previous chapter! It was a long one, so thank you for sticking through with me. We're about to lighten up a little with some Christmas spirit! ❄️🎁

**Also, if you're a fan of The Boys (and Soldier Boy), there's an awesome book you can check out, called Supes Ain’t Always Heroes: Inside the Complex Characters and Twisted Psychology of The Boys.

If you want to learn more about the book (including cast interviews and a character study on Soldier Boy), I wrote a review about it here!

Otherwise, on to some more firefighter!Dean!

🔥Series Masterlist

Word Count: 5,800 Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! Smut, fluff, tinge of angst, hurt/comfort, lots of feels.

Part 15: “The Good Part”

“How many damn arrests does that make?” Daniel asked. He gripped his pool cue with both hands while he leaned on it.

His son stood at the other end of the pool table, lining up his shot. He paused to think.

“Six,” Nick replied. His cue released, and it knocked two of his balls into the pocket.

“Six,” Daniel repeated, while Nick came his way to find an angle for his next turn.

Daniel shook his head. His lips were angrily pursed. His eyes might’ve been on the pool game, but he was playing chess in his mind. He had underestimated John Winchester’s for far too long, it seemed.

The man was stubborn as all hell. And he’d been busy lately, getting “Azazel’s” men busted for all manners of bullshit.

“Alastair’s mole says Winchester’s been calling in favors from his old friends in Narcotics, trying to bust our small fries,” Nick reported. “Getting them on everything from petty theft to drug possession, with intent to sell. But it’s nothing we can’t pull ‘em out of.”

“Time, money, added risk,” Daniel cited on his fingers all the reasons why John Winchester was a pain in his ass. “It’s only a matter of time before they get a warrant to rip apart Savage & Co., sweep the whole damn building. For forensic evidence, our files, all the jazz.”

Daniel’s fingers drummed thoughtfully against his chin. “A damn cop thinks he’s being cute.”

Nick missed his second turn. His hand fell against his thigh in annoyance, but he looked up.

“Dad, it’s your move.”

Daniel rubbed at his chin. His eyes were no longer seeing the board in front of him. Eventually, they slid up and met his son’s gaze.

“We’re going to start from the beginning,” he said.

Nick’s face gave away his confusion. “What? What do you mean?”

Daniel just smiled.

It was Christmas Day, and John was late. Sam and Dean were used to that drill, so they weren’t expecting him until dinnertime.

Meanwhile, it gave you a chance to find your footing as you got to know Eileen. She had helped you bake the pies that were now cooling on the counter (pumpkin and berry crumble), and a few of the side dishes for dinner. Sam had covered cleaning up the rest of the house, while Dean tackled his favorites: the ham and the mac and cheese.

Now the guys were in the living room watching football while you and Eileen were still in the kitchen, decorating some gingerbread cookies you two had made. She enjoyed it; doing holiday crafts with her students had been bringing out her artistic side, she told you. You were happy for the help and the conversation.

You later tried to cover up your snort of laughter as she finished telling you the story of how Dean once dared Sam to wear women’s underwear for a whole week.

If he managed it, Dean had promised to do all the household chores for three months. If Sam couldn’t make it the whole week, then he would face the consequences: Dean would tell their dad about the bet.

“How old were they?” you asked.

Eileen scoffed. “Sam was a senior in college.”

You burst out laughing again. “So too old, is the answer… Did he win?”

Eileen gave you a mischievous smile.

“He did,” Dean said, as he appeared in the kitchen doorway with a familiar smirk. “I’ve got photographic evidence. It was a cheetah print thong, in case you were wondering.”

Your eyes widened on a laugh. “Oh my God.”

Cheetahlicious, you couldn’t help joking in your mind. Even if you’d rather not think of Sam wearing a pair of Victoria Secret’s best.  

Eileen giggled with you. Dean’s amusement gave way to curiosity as he eyed the little gingerbread men you two were icing. You warned him off with your eyes, but it took Eileen batting his hand when he tried to steal a cookie.

“Hey! Wait ‘til after dinner,” she said.

Dean pouted. “Come on, don’t be stingy.”

Rolling her eyes, Eileen sighed.

“You’re like one of my kids,” she said, while signing with her hands. But she caved and handed him a cookie. “Here. To tide you over.”

Dean smiled and signed back to her in ASL, Thank you.

“That’s why you’re my favorite,” he said. He leaned down to kiss her cheek in a brotherly gesture.

He shot you a wink before taking a bite of his prize. You shook your head at him, even though you were smiling. He came around to your side of the table. His hand rested on your back and he bent down towards your ear.  

“I actually came over for you,” he said. “Got a minute?”

Your brows rose, but you turned to Eileen in askance. “I’ll be right back. Is that okay?”

She nodded and made an “OK” gesture. “Of course.”

You smiled and let Dean lead you out of your chair, and even out of the apartment. He made sure you both grabbed your coats by the front door.

“Where are we going?” you asked. While you put on your coat over your sweater and jeans, you didn’t notice him grabbing two sets of keys.

“Just downstairs. No big deal,” he said, hefting on his own leather jacket.

You eyed him with some suspicion, but you walked with him down to the elevators and let him keep you close to his side. He smelled like the cologne you bought him for Christmas, and he was already wearing the new watch as well.

You’d struggled to find him the right gift. Nothing felt quite enough after everything he’d done for you the last few months. He’d assured you that he was grateful for both gifts, and had even tried to say the watch looked too expensive. (You’d shut him up with a kiss.)

Now, you had to wonder what he was up to as he led you into the parking lot, but not toward Baby. Instead, you two stopped in front of a shiny silver Chevy parked in a guest spot.

“Dean, what’d you do?” you asked, both excited and worried. He shot you a grin and dangled the keys in front of you.

“You like her?” he asked. His eyes were dancing. “You could keep her, if you ask nicely.”

Your face slackened. You looked between him and the sleek looking car.

“What?” You covered your mouth with both hands. Even after a few moments, your brain was still having a hard time computing. “No…what? Oh my God!”

You grabbed onto his jacket, just in case your legs failed you. Dean laughed and gathered you up in his arms. By the time you peeled your eyes away from the silver beauty to look up at your boyfriend, there were tears already swimming in your eyes.

“Dean, this is really too much. Where’d you find—”

“Bobby had it sitting in his garage for years,” he explained. His hand came up to brush your cheek, and the tears there. “I cleaned her up, dropped in a new engine, safe-proofed with new tires, new airbags, the works. Got her purring like a kitten.”

Your eyes grew a little wider with every admission. Then you softened, gripping the edges of his jacket while you bit your lip to keep it from wobbling.

“How much did he sell it to you for?” you asked. Dean dropped his head back with a sigh.

“Don’t you wanna take a test ride before we start hagglin’?”

You lightly smacked his chest. “Hey. How much?”

He let out another heavy sigh, but you eventually got it out of him. While the price wasn’t as bad as you might’ve expected, you still shook your head.

“I still have a decent chunk of insurance money left. I’m giving you at least half,” you said.

Dean shook his head. “This is my gift to you.”

Your lips pursed, despite the smile that wanted to peek through.

“Nice try,” you said wryly. “You already got me perfume.”

“That was just the decoy.” He grinned, and held you a bit tighter against him. He nodded towards the car. “She’s the main event.”

You wanted to sigh, but this conversation wasn’t over. You were definitely not letting him buy you a whole new…old car. You turned to look at it again.

“What model is this?” you asked.

“2002 Camaro Z28,” Dean rattled off. It sounded impressive, but you didn’t know much about cars.

He let go of you so you could get a closer look. Your hand passed over the hood, but didn’t touch, as if you were afraid of staining the paint with your fingerprints. He had to admit, he’d waxed it up good and managed to get rid of a lot of superficial nicks and scratches.

What he said was true though; Bobby had given him a frankly ridiculous deal. Because when Dean had told him what you’d been through after the car accident, dealing with your grandfather’s passing, and now your ever-mounting expenses, Bobby hadn’t let him walk away from Singer Salvage with anything else but this car. He’d even helped Dean get the new parts he needed to fix it up.

“Is it automatic or manual?” you asked, trying to peer through the driver’s window. “I haven’t driven stick in a hell of a long time.”

Dean came up from behind you and his warm hand found your hip. You let him draw you back into his arms, leaning against his chest.

His lips were close to your ear when he said, “I think you’re damn good at driving stick.”

It took you a second, but the heavily laden innuendo in his deep voice was hard to miss. You uttered a laugh and swatted his arm.

“You’re ridiculous,” you said. You were still smiling when you turned and twined your arms around his neck. Then you leaned up for a kiss—one that kept getting deeper with the full force of your gratefulness, and your love for this man.

“It’s an automatic,” he answered, between kisses. You giggled against his lips.

You barely felt the chill on the air. Your heart was beating fast, even when you pulled away from him. Your eyes slowly opened and met his. He smiled down at you and curled an errant strand of hair behind your ear. As usual, you had most of it clipped up.

“Merry Christmas, sweetheart,” he said. His voice was quiet, but steady.

You let out a shaky breath. Emotion was clogging your throat, making your tears burn anew.

“This is a bit more than a Christmas present,” you said. He gave a more self-deprecating smile.

“Well, it’s also kind of an apology,” he said. “For getting you mixed up in my ‘family business.’”

He still felt guilt beyond belief for putting you in danger. For your life being threatened. For being the reason you couldn’t go home.

You just shook your head. Your hand raised to press against his cheek. Your thumb drew tenderly along his chin.

“I thought you said you were part of my family now?” you said. “We’ll figure this out together, like everything else.”

Dean’s eventual smile lightened you, and his kiss warmed you down to your toes. 

“If you want, let’s go for a ride after dinner,” he said.

It was your turn to smirk. Your hands migrated under his jacket and teased at his belt.

“Well, I’m certainly down for a ride,” you said.

Dean laughed and squeezed your hips. “All right. I’m puttin’ you on my naughty list.”

When John finally arrived, the brothers welcomed him in first with big man hugs and good-natured ribbing for him being so damn late.

In Sam’s words, Upholding a Winchester family tradition.

John had taken that with a chuckle. “Smells damn good in here.”

“Yeah, food’s been done for an hour,” Dean prodded at him again. His grin betrayed his teasing, however. His welcoming hand stayed on his dad’s shoulder until they reached the living room, where Sam had set up a longer fold out table and chairs to function as the makeshift dining room, since the table near the kitchen only seated three.

There you were opening a bottle of Jack Daniels. You smiled up at John.

“Figured you were more of a whiskey than wine kind of guy,” you said. You were a bit nervous to see him again, no doubt with flour in your hair and frosting staining your hands. He clasped your shoulder with a hint of a smile.

“You’d be right. Good to see you, darlin’,” he said.

“You too,” you replied. Despite the fact that the first and last time you two had met, it had been in front of your house as the police rifled through your life, looking for more explosives. He graciously didn’t bring that up as he greeted Eileen next.

Once dinner was on the table, there was a lot of catching up between the brothers and their father while you and Eileen continued talking, even through dessert.

“This really is amazing,” she told you, pointing her fork at her slice of berry crumble. “I can see why you went to culinary school.”

You blushed as Sam, Dean, and even John echoed her praise. All three men had generous slices of both pies. 

“Well, thank you. I’m glad you guys enjoy it,” you said, and your smile was genuine.

You loved making good food, but you loved feeding people even more. Whether it was a simple hearty soup or a rich dessert, you liked putting smiles on their faces and giving them a good experience; one they could share with their family and friends. Even better if it was your family.

Or as Dean would say, Your people. 

To you, that was life.

“I’m tellin’ you, if you opened up a bakery you’d make a killing in this town,” Dean said. He nudged your hand with the one that held his fork; it held a precarious piece of pumpkin pie.

You shot him an amused look.

“Don’t you look at me sideways, I’m serious,” he said, laughing a little, but his gaze was steady.

Your cheeks warmed against your will. He believed in your dream, even when you couldn’t quite let yourself.

“Hey, if you ever want to look into applying for a loan, I could help,” Sam said, earning your attention. “I have a friend who works at a bank.”

Your brows raised. “Really?”

He nodded. “Yeah, we were pre-law together back in college, but he figured he was better with numbers.”

You smiled. “Well, it would make it easier knowing I was dealing with your friend.”

“Yeah, his name’s Brady. Let me know if you want me to call him,” he said.

You bit your lip, but you nodded. “Thanks. I’ll let you know.”

Maybe they were right. Maybe you should start to believe in yourself, just a little bit more.

“This was all real delicious,” John said to you, when you came back from bringing the leftovers to the kitchen.

Sam and Dean were already arguing about who was doing the dishes and who was drying them. Meanwhile, Eileen was putting away the food (and probably rolling her eyes).

“Yeah, it was a team effort for sure,” you replied. “Dean’s actually a really good cook.”

John chuckled. “Yeah, well, he didn’t get that from me. I can barely boil a damn egg.”

You smiled to yourself; you could imagine Dean got it from his mother then.

Meanwhile, John was watching you stack the empty plates as he grew more contemplative. He’d always been proud of his sons. They were good men, with strong heads on their shoulders.

He often looked at Sam and saw that he seemed happy. Despite the demands of his job, he was learning to balance that with the life he led with Eileen. As a father, John looked forward to the day when they made a firm foundation, taking the next step towards building a life together.

But Dean had seemed to him, a little unstable. John was still proud of his eldest, but while he’d seen a glimpse of it that day at your house, he saw it even more today. Like his son finally had an anchor, tethering him to dry land.

Even so, he couldn’t help heaving a sigh. And he asked you something he knew he shouldn’t.

“Have you given any more thought to filing a report on Nick Savage?” he asked.

You paused in your plate and cup stacking. You looked up at him with a frown, but you thought about your words before you said something rude.

“Yes, I did,” you replied. “I decided my life and my peace were more important.”

He let out a short sigh. “I understand—”

“I’m sorry, John, but I don’t think you do,” you said. Your words were matter-of-fact, if a tad more sharp than you meant them to be. Your hands were starting to tremble.

You crossed your arms to try and steady yourself, but Dean ended up doing just that, by joining your side and resting a hand at the small of your back. He was frowning, glancing between you and his father.

“Tell me you’re not talking about what I think you are,” Dean said, addressing John in particular. “Not on damn Christmas.”

“Like you said, it’s her decision,” John replied. His gaze once again focused on you.

You let out a breath, mostly of exasperation.

“I’m going to bottom-line it for you. If I report that man, and you can’t guarantee me a job and safety until it’s all over, then I’m not poking the bear,” you said. “I plan to keep my head down until I can find another job. Until then, you can have at him all you want. Just leave me out of it.”

Part of you felt selfish. You knew what John was trying to accomplish, and you knew how personal this fight was for him, and for Sam and Dean for that matter. You just couldn’t shake your gut instincts here. You knew Nick far too well by now, and you didn’t want to underestimate him again.

“I agree,” said Dean. You gave him a grateful look.

John conceded with a nod, but all of you knew he wasn’t satisfied. It became a bitter ending to an otherwise brilliant day after he left for the night.

In your mind, it wasn’t quite over yet though. You had a plan up your sleeve for one Dean Winchester.

Sam and Eileen had their own time together while you and Dean went for a drive in your new car. You’d have to transfer your plate and registration and insurance, so it was technically an “illegal” drive, but it was already late and traffic was scarce.

By the time you pulled back into the parking lot, you were smiling from ear to ear, and Dean was giving you that smug grin that said, Aw yeah, I did good.

You couldn’t even fault him for it, because he did exactly that.

Even when you and Dean were getting ready for bed, it didn’t quite feel real. You were living with your boyfriend of just a few months, you now had a new car, and a crime lord had threatened your life.

You chose to focus on the new car. And on your boyfriend, who sat on the edge of his side of the bed, rubbing his right shoulder through his shirt. You knew it must still be sore, though he likely wouldn’t admit it.

Hence, you were about to enact Phase 1 of your plan…

You hadn’t undressed yet from your jeans and sweater, but you crawled across the bed to come up behind him and drop a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“How’s your slugging arm?” you asked.

Dean quirked a smile at you over his shoulder. “Just fine.”

“Dean,” you said. Your tone was gentle, but warning. No downplaying.

You pressed your lips against the side of his head and soothed your hand along his shoulder and down his arm. Still, he was resistant.

“I’m fine, sweetheart,” he said.

You hummed. “Okay. I guess you don’t need a massage then.”

He paused. His head tilted just so, once again turning to you over his shoulder. You spied the edge of his piqued interest, his grin.

“Well, if you’re offering…”

You withdrew your hand from his arm, but you spoke close to his ear.

“Are you asking?”

He let out a small sigh, despite his lingering smile.

“All right. Will you please give me a lil’ massage?” he asked.

He couldn’t see your triumphant smile, but you happily kissed his cheek.

“I sure can,” you replied. You laid gentle hands on his shoulders, however briefly. “Stay right here. Don’t move, but take off your shirt.”

“All right, Miss Bossy,” he grumbled. You knew he was teasing by the amused look he threw your way.

“I thought you liked that,” you teased back.

You climbed off the bed before he could playfully grab you, and you giggled all the way to the bathroom. There you began Phase 2 of your plan. 

First, you collected a few different bottles from your designated drawer under the sink. Then, you made a quick wardrobe change, after popping back into the bedroom to grab something from your nightstand.

You also connected your phone to the speaker on his nightstand and put some music on a low volume. It was a playlist he’d made and shared with you a while ago, with songs he thought you’d like. The Eagles’ “Take It to the Limit” was definitely on the list.

By the time you returned to Dean, he was indeed shirtless, still in his sweatpants, and checking his watch.  

“I’m here, I’m here,” you said. You climbed across the bed with your small haul—a difficult feat with your hands full, but you managed.

Dean turned to look at the bottles of moisturizer you dropped next to him on the bed. He rose a brow.

“Twilight Woods. Japanese Cherry Blossom. Appletini. Are these my only options?” he asked. His face was half bemused, half reluctant.

You almost burst out laughing. “Which one strikes your fancy?”

He scratched the back of his head. You opened the second bottle first (your personal favorite), so he could smell.

“Not bad actually,” he muttered. You bit your lip so you wouldn’t giggle, but you managed to open the other two for him to get a whiff.

“Eh, the first one I guess,” he said.

Japanese Cherry Blossom. AKA: a classic from Bath & Body Works.

You finally had to laugh. “Just kidding. I’ve got this.”

You held up a jar you’d been hiding behind him. Its logo said: Massage Oil.

“I just wanted to see which girly moisturizer you secretly wanna slather all over yourself,” you said.

Dean shot you a wry look, but only then did he see what you were wearing.

“Oh, hold up,” he uttered.

Your hair was let loose, how you knew he liked, and you’d teased it out a little. You’d had to give away the red lingerie you’d bought, to rid both of you of its lingering memories of your work Christmas party. Instead, you’d found something in a vibrant emerald green: satin and lace.

Dean’s hand reached for your waist, probably to bring you closer. But you playfully slapped his hand.

“Eh-eh! Not yet,” you said to his surprised face. You smiled. “I have a plan for you tonight.”

Slowly, he smirked. His eyes still dipped to take in the rest of you, from your pretty face, to exposed skin and cleavage, to shiny satin that clung to your curves and draped down to mid-thigh. 

“I can see,” he said. His voice was a notch deeper. “Merry Christmas to me.”

Despite your blush and growing smile, you turned him back around by his shoulders.

“Just relax.”

You let your hands drifts up the back of his neck to slide your fingers through his hair. There you began with a slow, gentle massage of his head. You felt him take a deep breath.

You couldn’t see it, but Dean’s eyes had closed at your ministrations. He secretly really liked the feeling of your fingers running through his hair. It made his shoulders loosen; with tension he didn’t know he had releasing from the neck down.

Aside from the rigors of his job, he also had to work out and condition his body to keep up his stamina. He probably didn’t spend as much time as he should on this aspect of things, making sure he wasn’t overtaxing himself.

He appreciated what you were doing though. He knew you cared about him, that you loved him. But he liked like you were also a caring person, who tried to take care of him. Dean hadn’t really had that…from anyone before. Sometimes, it was hard for him to let you.

…Damn, we really got too much in common, he realized.

When you migrated back down his neck, your hands left for a moment to gather up some oil. It was warm against his skin when you started between his shoulders, digging with the heel of your hands.

He groaned deep, surprising even himself.

Behind him, your brows were furrowed. “You’re really knotted up here. When was the last time you had a massage?”

Dean chuckled. “Never.”

You frowned. “Hmm. Okay, we’re definitely doing this more often.”

“No complaints from me,” he said with a grin.

Of course, you gave special attention to his right shoulder. You were gentler there, asking what was tender and what felt good, or too much. By then you had an easier time getting the truth out of Dean. He let you know when the pressure was too much, and you even helped him stretch out that arm until the muscles and joints were warmed up and the pain was gone.

You encouraged him to lie on his stomach in the middle of the bed, so you could start on his back. Your hands glided down planes of muscle and smooth slopes while you straddled his thighs. The only sounds you heard from him were occasional moans and rumbling, pleased sounds. That was also what let you know that he hadn’t fallen asleep.

“Okay, turn over,” you said, smiling when he groaned in protest. “I haven’t even gotten to the good part.”

“What the hell’s the good part then?” he asked. His voice was muffled in the mattress, but when he turned around, flopping onto his back, his eyes once again took in the green satin and seemed to remember what your real intentions were.

“Oh, yeah,” he said. His grin was lazy, now that he was beyond relaxed, but his hands found purchase on your hips. You smiled down at him.

You let the remaining oil on your hands glide up his chest, until you lowered down for a kiss. It was unhurried and sweet.

“I love you, you know?” you said.

Dean swept his fingers through your hair, tucking a few strands behind your ear.

He smiled. “I’ve got some idea, yeah.”

You both laughed, soft and true. Your hand rested against his cheek as you pressed your lips to his, soft and slow at first, but soon gaining in both passion and urgency. You felt his grip on your hips tighten, grinding your center against his growing length.

He groaned. No goddamn panties on. Good.

You kissed your way from his lips to his neck. Your teeth grazed his ear while you rolled your hips into his. It was a tease for both of you, but not for long, as Dean grew impatient enough to slide his sweatpants down, followed by his hands slipping under the satin covering your thighs. They traveled further still, squeezing your breasts and rolling hardened nipples under the pads of his thumbs.

Your breath hitched, and your pleased hum was music to his ears. By now you were bracing yourself against the mattress, but you used his shoulders as leverage to raise yourself up.

You took his hands and encouraged them to bunch up the satin and pull it over your head. Dean sat up with you still in his lap, and once his strong arm wrapped around your waist, it was skin to flushed skin.

You held his face and brought him down to you for another fierce kiss. He held you tightly against him, hands played across your back and tangling in your hair. His arms were a cage you never wanted to escape.

But you did press away from him, just for a moment, so you could reach down between your bodies to take a firm hold of his cock. You guided it to your entrance. There was already a small flood between your legs, and your core ached for him.

There was almost no resistance when you slowly sunk your hips down and down, until he was buried deep inside you.

You both made sounds of pleasure, with labored breaths as Dean’s hand cradled your cheek. He laid open-mouthed kisses to your jaw, teeth grazing down your neck.

You clung to his shoulders and began to move, slow in the way you let almost the full length of his cock escape you, before you slid back down. Dean moaned into your skin, and you let out a shuddering sigh.

You pushed at Dean’s chest until he was lying back, and you continued rolling your hips against his. He helped you create a steady rhythm on top of him, but he was being treated to a feast of the eyes as well as the pleasure rocking through his body. He watched the way you swept your hair back. The way your eyes closed and brows furrowed in concentration as you bit your lip.

But he couldn’t stay still for long; he knew he was close enough to practically taste his end, but you had some miles to go. He gripped your thigh with one hand while the other glided up between them, to further part your folds. His fingers found your clit, circling insistently like it was a button. It had your hips stuttering.

“Oh, God,” you uttered. “Dean—”

He managed to smirk through panting breaths. “Right there, right baby?”

You nodded, unable to speak. You continued to move as steadily as you could, but the feeling of him deep inside combined with his talented fingers playing you like a five-string guitar—it finally made you tighten on him, shuddering deep inside. Tingles broke across your skin, zipping up your spine as you gasped.

Dean helped you with the last few hard thrusts that brought him along with you, and you felt his warmth spilling inside you.

It wasn’t the first time that had happened, since you were on birth control. But after you slid off his lap and practically rolled into his side, him welcoming you with an arm wrapping around your waist, it did make you think, as you caught your breath.

It made you think about the first time you and Dean slept together. It had been the first and last time you’d asked him to wear a condom. The next morning, he’d made a remark that still hung in the back of your mind…

“You like kids, huh?”

The thought still rattled through your mind now, after you and Dean shared a quick shower, ridding you both of the oil clinging to your skin. The thought remained when you slid into bed, under fresh sheets and thick covers, and close to your man. He cupped your cheek and pressed a kiss to your forehead. You closed your eyes at the feeling.

Contrary to what this night had been, the whole “moving in together” thing hadn’t been all that easy. You two had bickered about the way he often left drawers and cabinets open and dirty clothes on the floor.

He had made remarks about your hair products taking up too much space in his drawers. Not to mention how morning routines needed to adjust because Dean liked to shower in the morning, but you needed the mirror not fogged up in order to do your makeup.

Right now, however, you had peace. You felt safe here, and you weren’t alone in a huge house filled with far too many memories.

“Can I ask you something?” you said.

Dean’s lips lingered on your forehead. “Hmm?”

“I know this situation is sort of temporary, me living here,” you said. “So much has happened that we haven’t really talked about…what we both want, down the line.”

He pulled back enough from you to see your face. His face betrayed a thread of confusion.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“I mean like…” you hesitated, but you realized you were probably going to have to be direct. “Are you a marriage and kids kind of guy? Is that even something you’ve thought about?”

Dean met your gaze. It took him a moment, but he let out a short sigh.

“You wanna know what made me want to start dating, for real?” he asked.

You blinked; you hadn’t expected that, but you nodded.

“I started thinking about what would happen if something happened to me on the job,” he said. You frowned, but before you could say anything, he raised a placating hand.

“I thought about what I’d leave behind,” said Dean. He quirked a wry smile. “It’s not much, besides my car.”

You frowned in earnest. Your hand flattened against his bare chest.

“That’s not true,” you said. “You have your brother, your father, and your friends. That’s plenty, Dean.”

He conceded that with a nod. “You’re right. But I just started thinking, maybe I want more. Like uh…like what my parents had, when they were happy. The house, each other, me and Sammy…a family.”

You couldn’t be certain in the near total darkness of the room, with only the moonlight filtering through the blinds and casting a glow behind him, but you thought you saw a shine in his eyes. Your hand crept up from beneath the covers to find his cheek. It was rough with stubble, yet you tenderly swept a thumb back and forth.

“I think that’s beautiful,” you replied.

Dean paused. He then huffed in amusement. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you smiled, hoping he could see it. 

“Then uh, is that something you’d be into?” he asked. You were amused by his tentative approach. 

“With you?” You pretended to think. Your fingers slipped into his hair. “Yeah, I think I’m into that.”

He chuckled. “Okay, then. Good to know.”

He grasped your wrist and turned his head to press a kiss into your palm.

And he spoke into the dark. “I love you too, you know.”

Your smile deepened as you rested your head against his arm. You whispered into the small space between your faces.

“Yeah, I’ve got some idea.”

AN: 🥹 All righty, how'd you like that fluff overload?

...Ready for some more drama? 😏

Next Time:

But the more you thought about what you’d heard, and Nick’s ominous threat about a cop, you found yourself scrolling lower in your contacts. You called John Winchester.

It rang a few times, and all the while you made silent, fervent prayers. Pick up, damn it! You could hear your own heartbeat in your ears.

“Winchester,” he answered.

“John, it’s me,” you whispered. “Azazel’s here. Or, he’s not here, here, but I know who he is. Well, I mean kind of—”

“Okay, wait. Slow down,” he said. “What about Azazel? You know who he is?”

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Series Tag List (Part 1):

@hobby27 @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer @iamsapphine @simpforbuckyb

@vanillawhiskeyflavoredkisses @roseblue373 @this-is-me19 @emily-winchester @spnexploration @deans-spinster-witch @deans-baby-momma @iprobablyshipit91

@melancholictearz @nic-kolas @katherineann814 @sleepyqueerenergy @wayward-lost-and-never-found @thewritersaddictions @just-levyy @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @deanwanddamons @antisocialcorrupt @lacilou @adoringanakin @theonlymaninthesky @teehxk @midnightmadwoman @brianochka @branj19

@agalliasi @venicesem @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @solariklees @xsophianicolex @deansbbyx @candy-coated-misery0731 @curlycarley @sarahgracej @bagpussjocken @ultrahviolentart @chernayawidow @beskarfilms @mimaria420

[the-valiant-valkyrie]

okay you know what. i joked about it before, but i'm actually kind of tired of the automatic response to maxwell's actions in encore being "he has a plan" or "he's playing double agent" or something along those lines. he might be, he might not be- currently we don't know. but the point of the matter is in the grand scheme of things that doesn't really matter.

it feels as though people aren't really paying attention to the fact that charlie is. you know. manipulating him? that she's playing max like a god damned fiddle? that the entirety of encore was seemingly planned from the very start?

lets go through the short again piece by piece:

maxwell starts off alone. considering that- at the end of the short, the others eventually found him- they couldn't have been too far away from him. this implies that charlie was waiting for a proper moment to strike, rather than simply coming in at any random time.

not only did the rose vines actively trip him, and not ONLY did he fall directly in front of a newly overgrown statue of him, but he ALSO fell in the direct line of sight of a rook. this is not only a presumable act of emotional manipulation (she pretty much picked him up and dropped him right in front of a big sign with "Fuck You Idiot" written on it), but she also purposefully endangered him! do you really think its just coincidence that this animation completely dominated by chess metaphors begins with an attack from a rook? if it was just there from happenstance, it would have gored maxwell alive after he fell unconscious. its presence was entirely pre-planned. she wounded him completely on purpose.

i really don't even NEED to talk about all the flashback scenes. if you don't understand how that's manipulation i'm sorry but you're a little bit too far gone. seeing charlie as he knew her before- seeing the good memories he had with her, seeing the success he had, and seeing how he ruined it all with his obsession over the codex. pre-encore update he couldn't even LOOK at the codex without thinking about her. she could be about to kill him and he STILL tried reaching out to her. he's been waiting his entire LIFE for this conversation- to apologize, to speak with her. and when he finally gets it, it's charlie who dominates the conversation. who twists it so he can't even get the words out.

"if only you had let me in". accompanied with the previous flashbacks, that line alone is horribly insidious. and the worst part is, it isn't incorrect. he should have done that- back when he had a chance to fix his mistakes. but that isn't what charlie is referring to. the past can't be altered- they both know that. the only reason charlie is saying this at all is to goad him into siding with her. to picking the choice she's pointing him in the direction of. "you didn't let me in before. it ruined your life- my life. our life. obviously you're going to make the same mistake now."

whether its a hallucination or dream or not, being haunted by and in the clutches of shadow creatures is bound to take a toll on his sanity. even with the benefits from his suit. the terrorbeaks, the watchers, the flashbacks, the presence of the woman he hasn't seen in decades. if you don't think that's taking a toll on his mind you're lying to yourself. when charlie phantoms up the chess board, you can see it squeezing him, and him wincing in response. even after it lets him go, he can't do anything but pant on the floor. vision or not, it is having a tangible effect on him

after everything charlie does, she cleans him up. but the thing is, everything wrong with him (aside from his hair, pretty much) was her fault. tripping down the hill, the bruises from the rook, his mental disarray from her shadow creatures. she's undoing what she willingly plagued him with- but in a way that gains his favor, despite the fact she was the catalyst

the use of the rose- the same thing that linked the two of them when times were less troublesome- again plays into that insidiousness of linking the past and the present. if it was the correct course of action back then, it must be now, right? she's using not only his emotional attachment to her, but his remorse for the wrong course of action to make him think this one is the right one.

NOT TO MENTION, CHARLIE'S KIND OF LIKE? GOD? I DON'T THINK HE COULD SAY NO TO HER EVEN IF HE WANTED TO? SHE'S GOD?

in conclusion, if the nightmare conglomerate that used to be your ex waited until you were alone, jumped you on the street (which hurts), sicked one of her goons on you (which hurts), uses her nightmare creatures to psychically and physically torment you, brought up the parts of your past that you- to this day- are horribly scarred by, tells you that she'll forgive you "but only if you make the right decision this time", cleans you up and fixes your wounds from the jumping and the gooner attack and the psychic torment (all her fault), then "gives [you] a chance to right [your] wrongs", AND she's also god? sorry. you're not going to say no.

sure, he could feel regretful about it. he could be planning to go against her. he could have figured out her game from the very beginning. but everyone who's clutching their pearls over maxwell's 'betrayal' is acting like charlie just shot him a business card or something. i would NOT blame him if he thought- in that moment- he was doing the right thing.

[whitleyschn33]

RWBY Volume 9 Episode 3 Liveblog Thoughts

I know I didn’t do episode 2, but there wasn’t really anything about it that caught my attention enough to make a post about - save 2 things, but those are better left to their own posts.

I’ve just finally gotten home from work, had dinner, and washed up, so I’m feeling very sleepy. If I miss something you think is worth being commented on or further discussed, let me know!

- “The Red King helped Alyx” I saw KitKat say this earlier, and it’s something that’s been in the back of my mind for a while as well - I wish we knew the story of The Girl Who Fell Through the World ourselves rather than having elements of it introduced basically right before they happen. I know working in another campfire storytime without being boring would be difficult (actually, side note, notice that we haven’t seen night here yet? No moon...), but I feel like something could have been worked out. A scene where the girls talk about the versions of the story that they grew up with (since myths and fairy tales often have multiple versions), arguing about the details and giving us as the audience a clearer understand of how the full story goes and how each kingdom/family of RWBY interprets and tells the story. Would have been nice to know this story from more than a couple lines in volume 8 (that I had to be reminded of existing) before we start living it.

-I got to give props to the sound design on the Prince so far, I really like the clinking noises as he moves, really helping sell that he’s a living puppet.

-Uhhhh, insulting the guy you’re expecting to help you probably isn’t a great idea, even if he is a brat.

- “The king would still be here if it wasn’t for your kind” - so the guards do recognize human beings. Did Alyx kill the Red King? (Insert Wreck it Ralph “Things are finally getting interesting around here” screencap)

-Weiss being this overly expressive in her poses still isn’t funny, please stop.

-I’m really digging the score, very fun and bouncy.

-”How could you” best voice work I’ve heard from Lindsey in a while, very nice~ Also, uh, kinda to be expected, Ruby. If someone’s entire gimmick is the color red, makes sense green isn’t their thing.

-Well uh... that’s kinda dark, but... they’re toys. Can they even die like that? I was half expecting their heads to roll out and still be talking to each other.

-Not sure I’d be too eager to play games with someone that just said they found beheadings fun.

-I feel like the butterfly must be connected to either Alyx or the shadow boy in the painting.

-Soldier coughing up sawdust - not funny, but a nice touch

-Ruby, do not play a game you don’t know how to play, you are going to lose bad

-Okay, really liking the score, I’m very glad that it’s back after a noticeable abscene.

-Also, was this just... not in the story? Did Alyx not play checkers/chess with the King? Chess is a pretty big deal in Through the Looking Glass, so I would’ve assumed it would be part of Alyx’s story as well. Guess the Red Prince is more sadistic.

-Okay, this is Risk, not Checkers.

-Uhhh, the rules were to move a pawn one space each turn - why does Weiss charge ahead multiple spaces? Also, what constitutes a turn if Ruby is allowed to move 5 pawns in a row?

-Annnnnd Weiss hasn’t moved from her starting spot on the board.

-So “turns” are just whenever the Prince thinks the turns are. Fair enough, this is Not-Wonderland.

-Ruby, I wouldn’t be so cavalier about your species. We don’t know Alyx’s story that well, but we do know she started a war and “lied and cheated her way” through Ever After, so it’s not likely that the people would have a good impression of her or anyone like her.

- “You’re humans! You must have cheated!” Yep, something tells me if Alyx played a game, she cheated her way through it.

- And there’s our cat

- I like the cracks. Nothing else, just a sucker for it.

- Also, really digging the song. I’m going to actually look forward to hearing the full version.

- OH MY GOD, SOMEONE FINALLY RUN OUT OF AMMUNITION. Have we ever seen this happen in RWBY before? 

- It’s nice to finally get some action. Not the best choreography, and some of the stunts have me cringing, but I appreciate the show of actually teamwork in the fights, combining semblances.

- I like the cat’s voice - still don’t like his design, even if I can appreciate it as meant to resemble a “texture not found” effect (I hope that’s what they were going for anyway, cause otherwise yikes), but I appreciate the smooth talking, soothing the prince to get his way. 

- “The one thing you were put on this acre to do” Oh?

- “They might not come back” - implying that the soldiers do.

- Ohhhh, slick line from the cat~

- “We’re in it’s stupid sequel” - Weiss is honestly a mood. I would enjoy her attitude towards this a lot more without the attempts at comedy, as this is the first time I’ve smiled at one of these lines.

- I, uh, really hate these “Blake exposits the plot of TGWFTTW (i got tired of typing it out) to the team”, because this is something the girls *should* know. Even people that haven’t read or watched any adaptations of Alice in Wonderland know the Cheshire Cat, and I know they’ve mentioned him in the last episode, so all four of the girls should instantly realize who this must be, and anyone watching the show would know what this is meant to parallel. Otherwise, what was the point of making TGWFTTW a story that all the girls knew? If you were going to have Blake explain everything anyway, why not make it a more obscure story? Maybe even a fairy tale among the Faunus specifically?

-And there’s our dear Neo. Odd that she fell so long after the others when we saw her falling with Ruby, but whatever, they’ve already lampshaded that.

-A one woman army now. Not sure how this is a progression of her semblance, but it does make me think that all the figures we see behind her in the opening are just clones she’s made, which I am far happier with than the idea of even more characters to keep track of and worry about this volume.

Overall? I actually enjoyed this episode - some fun action, good music and score. While some of the lines are cringe and none of the comedy really lands like it’s supposed to (I have no idea why they’re writing Weiss as though she’s RWBY Chibi Weiss, but it’s annoying, please stop), but I’ll take it. Definitely the most I’ve enjoyed an episode since Dark.

[leverage-commentary]

Leverage Season 3, Episode 12, The King George Job, Audio Commentary Transcript

John: Hey I'm John Rogers, executive producer.

Christine: Hello I'm Christine Boylan, writer of this episode.

John: And unfortunately the fantastic director, Millicent Shelton, of this- of this episode could not join us.

Christine: Because she's working all the time!

John: She's working all the time.

Christine: She's amazing!

John: Christine, how did this show come about?

Christine: I am obsessed with- [Laughs] a lot of things that are in this episode. And I begged you to let me do them.

John: The only thing missing from this is bustles and parasols, really.

Christine: It's true! It's true, we had everything but bustles and parasols.

John: James Frain.

Christine: James Frain! Obsession. [Laughs]

John: Great actor, yes, that wasn't creepy at all on set.

Christine: He became one.

John: Yeah, there you go. No, it was- we had been- we wanted to do a Sophie backstory episode for a while.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: We had been wanting to talk about- since we had been addressing - all year - everyone's reason for being on the show.

Christine: Obsession.

John: Obsession?

Christine: Eliot in a pilot outfit.

John: Eliot in a pilot outfit? Really? I did not know that.

Christine: [Laughs] Look guys, hot guys in pilot outfit? That's hot.

John: I was not aware.

Christine: I'm just saying.

John: And, you know, as you'll see in the finale, you know, we really get into why Eliot is trying to redeem himself. And in this was our chance to kinda see- to have Sophie realize what a lot of grifters sorta push off, is that it's not a victimless crime.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: You know, that you rip off institutions and you rip off insurance companies, so it's all kind of a chess match with giant corporations and you know, that there is some human fallout. Which is something shes not dumb enough not to realize before, but she’s always emotionally quashed.

Christine: She's been able to turn a blind eye to it before now.

John: Exactly, because she’s evolving. She's actually- that's something we talk about in the Sophie/Nate relationship all the time is part of the problem is, Sohpie’s actually becoming a better human being faster than Nate is.

Christine: Hmm.

John: And that's one of the reasons they can't actually ever quite make it work.

Christine: Mhhm, mhmm.

John: She's farther along her sort of, you know, decency evolution.

Christine: This, look- this was, all day this large choreographed scene where they said, “You may as well have written The Music Man.”

[Laughter]

Christine: It's a lot of moving parts, a lot of people doing a lot of simultaneous things, and it had to play out almost like a little play, which was a lot of fun for me.

John: Yes. You love little plays.

Christine: I do love little plays.

John: Camera people when you have three or four cameras in there at the same time, not so much.

Christine: No likey. Camera people no likey.

John: Big thing for the fans, kids- people dig Eliot Spencer helping adorable war orphans.

Christine: I know, yeah, they really do. And how cute is this kid, she's so cute.

John: She was adorable, she was really great.

Christine: She was wonderful. She was wonderful.

John: And this was also- it was interesting we were breaking this episode, it was so plotty that it was one of those things where we realized we just have to jump in the middle.

Christine: Just- I love starting in the middle. Oh my god, great, staring.

John: Just immediate - we’re up, we’re running.

Christine: We’re up and running.

John: The audience knows the show by now, we’re well into third season, you'll figure it out!

Christine: I mean yeah, look it’s James Frain, do you think he's the good guy? No!

[John Laughs]

Christine: No, he's not the good guy!

John: He's a sinister Brit in a suit! Come on!

Christine: He's a vampire sometimes, sometimes he's a, you know, renaissance villain.

John: We did do the take where James kissed Aldis like in True Blood, and that's on the servers somewhere.

Christine: That's on my reel at home. That's a private reel.

John: By the way, having just flown through, this looks distressingly like the actual customs arrival at Logan.

[Laughter]

Christine: Yay!

John: Yeah, it’s actually pretty close, it’s actually-

Christine: Did you get caught with some contraband?

John: I did not get caught with some contraband.

Christine: Illegal lion statues?

John: No. 

Christine: Tiger statues?

John: No, I- all my illegal stuff is virtual.

Christine: I am also obsessed with antiquities trafficking. Because it is something that drug lords do to make money to move drugs, which is a lot fun! 

[Christine Laughs]

John: And we've mentioned on a couple of the commentaries, we spend a lot of time- and this is one of those weird things, you know, people that write shows are human and they get into their little sort of obsessions. And we got really deeply into money laundering and the ways in which you launder money this year. And it just so happens that some of them are very glamorous.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: Like antiquities smuggling.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: Yeah, it's not just for giant nations pillaging other giant nations.

Christine: It’s true.

John: Antiquities. It's for individuals too.

Christine: That was-

John: We gave her a bear! A little bear of peace to hug!

Christine: Come on, how cute is she?

John: She's adorable.

Christine: Adorable.

John: Adorable. An accessory after the fact, I'm sorry she's going to jail. 

[Christine Laughs]

John: That was another thing, too, by the way. I love watching the arc of audience research on the boards and forums.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: Cause I do go and watch, and as people know I’ve got the blog and ask questions. And this was one of those things where it's like, ‘Well I love the episode, but I don't know about- can they really take kids and keep them in custody? Can ICE really do that?’ And then about a day later- it's the same on all of them, a day later it's like, ‘Well, I'm doing some research,' and then about a day later, ‘Oh god, this is horrible!’

[Laughter]

Christine: Oh it's real!

John: ‘It's real and horrible!’

Christine: It's real!

John: Yeah. We do a lot of research into horrible things so you don't have to.

Christine: Mhmm.

John: And bang, we’re into the credits.

Christine: And here we are. That was very wonderfully cut together, wonderfully directed, vital kind of- they did a great job.

John: Truly difficult. That whole teaser, that happens in one scene.

Christine: They gave me so much shit on set. Paul Bernard just looked at me with the eyes of death like, ‘Come on lady! Nine pages, huh?’

[Christine Laughs]

John: Nine pages. You do write big scenes.

Christine: Look at this!

John: I adore you, but you do- you don't write television scenes.

Christine: Look at this shot!

John: Keep talking about the shot.

[Laughter]

Christine: This is Shanga Parker, he’s a great actor.

John: How long was the first act you ever gave me in the first script?

Christine: Twenty pages!

John: Twenty page act.

Christine: Twenty pages in The Miracle Job, act one.

[Laughter]

Christine: First draft.

John: There were some beautiful speeches, they’re lovely.

Christine: Some beautiful speeches, they moved to like act three mostly, so.

John: Now I'm sorry, what was I talking about?

Christine: This was Shanga Parker, he is a fantastic local actor who we worked with.

John: Where were we by the way? We are at the convention center?

Christine: Also a professor. This is the convention center.

John: In Portland. This is great.

Christine: Yeah, not overrun by comic book fans, which is usually how I see a convention center. So this was, you know-

[Laughter]

Christine: This was nice.

John: It's like, ‘Oh, this is what it looks like when normal humans walk through?’

Christine: Yeah! It's what- they look like airports!

John: Yeah theres no chunky transgendered Wonder Woman in here, it looks like an airport.

Christine: No. Oddly enough there was, actually.

John: That was odd, actually on the set.

Christine: I brought her with me, she was my assistant.

John: Really? There you go. Doing a lovely job, just- you know there's a lot of good people in the system, and doing their best to help people out. And, you know, it's one of the things we talk about the morality of the show. It's like, are we good guys, are we bad guys? Well, you know, sometimes the system needs a little kick in the ass, cause there are good people who are too good to kick it in the ass.

Christine: Absolutely. Immigration advocates, these guys work really hard.

John: That's a nice bit of staging, by the way, having the couple passed out on the couch.

Christine: Yeah.

John: That's a beautiful little bit of airport detail.

Christine: It was tough, we had to kinda cheat a little bit to make sure they weren’t distracting, but I learned a lot about what to put in background and what's already in the shot and- Millicent’s a great teacher, and she didn't mind me- my shadowing her like a little duckling for most of the shoot. It was really helpful.

John: That is also one of our first sort of great- we got in fast, and now we're doing a lot of backstory to reconnect this episode with the season arc.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: It's one of those weird things- and this is how it falls out. We had planned to salt the Moreau plotline about every third episode, but due to actor scheduling issues and a rewrite it just wound up being on either end of the season.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: So, you know, this really had- this episode had a lot of heavy lifting to do, which was kinda reintroduce this entire plotline. And Derek Frederickson of course doing great work on the graphics in order to make it clear.

Christine: Fantastic. And not only is he incredibly prepared and does a lot of research and does great work, you know, before, in prep. But when you show up on the day and you want something different, he can whip- he’s magician! He's a magician.

John: Yes, he's actually sitting there with a laptop and I said, you know, “Give me something that looks entirely different.” Five minutes later, “This?” “Oh my god!”

Christine: I have not bought him enough cocktails, that’s the- [Laughs]

John: I think- that has to be a digital shot. Because- yeah.

Christine: Yes.

John: We were shooting through the TVs at that point, and I don't think we’re capable of doing that.

Christine: No.

John: This was also very cunning of Millicent, to break our five up into twos in a way I don't think we'd done before by shooting straight at them.

Christine: Yes, yeah.

John: Usually we rake. Claridges, real? Made up?

Christine: Claridges is made up. A lot of the stuff in here is real in the Leverage world.

John: Yeah.

Christine: Some of the royal stuff, we wanted to- I love the royals. Don't you, John?

John: I hate the royals.

[Christine Laughs]

John: I hate the royals. It’s-

Christine: It’s class warfare.

John: It’s absolutely class- 

Christine: Class warfare.

John: If I could watch that castle burn to the ground… Anyway.

[Christine Laughs]

John: No, it was.

Christine: See I’d like to, you know, get them out and live in the castle.

John: Yeah, no.

Christine: It’s two different approaches, same result.

John: I am personally- level that ground and build a school on it.

Christine: More of an opportunist myself.

John: This was actually fun, was giving her the, “Can I brood here, too?”

Christine: Oh, yeah.

John: It's, you know, people are not unaware of the fact that Nate is a moody bastard. 

Christine: Mhm.

[Laughter]

John: And this is one of the- another great things in the third season where they are pairs, they are partners, they're, you know, they're equals here. This is, again, not a scene that would have happened in the first two. And part of the fun of doing television, you can develop relationships over a long periods of time.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: You can't do this in a movie.

Christine: No, you absolutely cannot. That's why movies will always be the inferior.

John: Really? Wow.

[Christine Laughs]

John: There's a reason you're my favorite!

Christine: Ohhh, that's right!

John: Nicely done!

[Christine Laughs]

John: There you go.

Christine: This was a lot of fun to shoot; this was rewritten. Like- I try to rewrite everything on the day, that's the- [Laughs]

John: Really, make it easier for yourself, Boylan.

Christine: Yeah, except for those big Music Man sequences. But this, you know, Gina and Tim know their characters, they wanna play and we can- this scene always gets ten times better when you sit down and just read it with them, you know?

John: It's always fun, too, because I remember the first time I was on set and they came up and they're like “John, we think we're rewriting this scene”. It was- I think it was in the military one first season, oh my god we made enough of these- Homecoming. Where we want to change the nature of this conversation, and I was bracing myself for the giant actor thing of a total rewrite but they just [unintelligible] two sentences later. ‘That's it?’

Christine: O-ok?

John: Alright, fine!

Christine: Sure!

John: And, you know, they- yeah.

Christine: There's a respect that goes both ways, and I think the writer needs to be present for the actor and vice versa. And it really-

John: That's what the writer’s on set for.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: You know-

Christine: And to learn directing secretly!

[Laughter]

John: Don't get seduced by directing. 

[Christine Laughs]

John: A monkey could direct. [Monkey noise] “Ahhh ahhh!” Pointing at- there are the actors! What else are you supposed to point the camera at? It's not hard, people!

Christine: But here is another one of these- this was- we shot it at a college?

John: Yeah.

Christine: Beautiful location.

John: Lovely establishing. Wow, her in that dress is kinda amazing.

Christine: She’s amazing. Oh my goodness, and this- this office. I mean we turned it into an auction house, everybody did such a good job just dressing it, and already a beautiful location.

John: Dressing on this was great. Yeah, Becca and the whole production design team doing an amazing job.

Christine: Becca's another one who’s just, you know, a magician.

John: Yeah.

Christine: [Laughs] like pulling it out of a hat, I don't know how she does that.

John: I love that you've got a picture of Queen Victoria there, cause that really establishes exactly the tone and the style of the auction we’re gonna be doing.

Christine: I think so, it certainly made me feel comfortable.

[Laughter]

Christine: Loyalist that I am.

John: I know. You understand that blood isn't special. You understand that, right?

[Christine Laughs]

John: And Frain with the ascot! How perfect is that!

Christine: Look at Frain! Nadine really had to sell me on the ascot, but once she did- once he walked in she looked at me and she said, “Right? Am I right?” And I said, “So right, Nadine.”

John: So right.

Christine: So right as always. That's- playing the thug there, Ollie Trevena. Hilarious, and-

John: Really great.

Christine: Good with the stunts.

John: And it's tricky too, cause we had to have one of the funnier thugs we've ever had in this one. He really had to be able

Christine: He got a little speechify later on.

John: That bang over from there to there, that’s- this what I really like about this episode in- you know, it's great - this is the first episode Millicent’s directed for us, and so she brought a subtly different style to the show.

Christine: Mhhm

John: And watching it, it made- I really enjoyed it, because we’re in London, it feels like our ‘we went to London’ episode. 

Christine: Yeah.

John: It has a tonal difference, and part of the fun of doing the show is it's a different movie every week.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: And this is one of the ones where it really feels like it's a different movie. You know, now we're doing our Thomas Crown.

Christine: Yes, absolutely.

John: You know, the other one you did, it's our Friends of Eddie Coyle, you know.

Christine: Mhhm. And once again, Portland did provide.

John: Yes. Absolutely. 

Christine: Portland gave us London, so thank you, Portland.

John: White gloves.

Christine: Just put gloves on this guy, we’re in London! There you go!

John: Now wouldn't you take the gloves off in order to-

Christine: Absolutely not, he would not.

John: Oh this was great, this may be the single sexiest scene in the entire show.

Christine: Oh, she’s like, ‘could this be longer?’ But she was great.

John: Yeah.

[Laughter]

John: Actors- they all want monologues, and then the monologues are too long.

Christine: Oh I know, Gina said the same thing.

John: You can tell I'm in the second Guinness cause I'm starting to bitch about them.

Christine: No, I love them.

John: No, this- I love this scene. 

Christine: She’s amazing.

John: Because, again, this is how Parker sees the world. Inanimate objects and people are both- you're capable of relating to both of them on exactly the same way.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: No. 

Christine: She's manipulating them as well.

[Christine Laughs]

John: Wow, I don't know where that came from.

Christine: John!

[Laughter]

John: This was a ton of fun, doing the auction research, and figuring out how that worked. All these- also the antiquities research, although you had a lot of that from your previous stuff.

Christine: I had brought a lot of that with me, but it was fun to kind of- I had mostly looked at, you know, older stuff. Really just stuff from antiquity. But looking at the kind of newer things in the King George stuff, and the, you know, the signet rings.

John: Yeah, and we have to give- and as part of the whole we use all the parts of the buffalo, we have to give a shout out to the wonder twins.

Christine: Oh, yeah.

John: Cause the wonder twins had originally come up with the idea of a treasure hunt episode.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And they put it in Boston, which naturally put it in revolutionary times.

Christine: Right.

John: That led us to King George, but then we shelved that episode-

Christine: Right.

John: So years later when we came into the antiquities, you jumped on that, and it was-

Christine: Let us do King George, yeah.

John: It was great.

Christine: See, they would go for the revolutionary side of things, and I went for the the-

John: I know.

Christine: Red coat side.

John: Really?

[Christine Laughs]

John: Really.

Christine: That's why we’re a good team!

John: Go live in Acadia.

Christine: We’re a great team!

John: We are a great team.

Christine: Look at that statue, statue of Ra. 

John: I love that you can just ask Eric Bates: we need a statue of Ra, and he's like “I've got one on the truck.”

Christine: Yup, patted me on the shoulder, “Alright, Boylan.” With that look of ‘You're crazy, but alright. Let's do it.’

John: No, well it's not quite as bad as when he walked in the first season finale and went, ‘how many tiny statues of David?’

[Laughter]

John: ‘You realize these don't exist, actually, anywhere?’

Christine: Oh, man.

John: It's never boring on Leverage.

Christine: Having Sophie figure out, you know, Frain’s character's heart desire on the fly.

John: Yeah.

Christine: That is- that was fun.

John: That was- this episode, interestingly, really benefits, because it's not a particularly action filled episode. It benefits from the density of the investigation.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: Because a lot of these- a lot of these scenes, a lot of these acts, and this is why you rewrite and stuff. Really in the outlining and the breaking we’re like “OK, this is gonna wind up being two episodes.”

Christine: Mhhm.

John: You know, and just crunching it and churching it and crunching it, really gave you exactly what everyone's job is at all times, and really made you understand why Sophie is a crucial part of this team. Sophie is a genius in her own way, as much as Nate is.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: No one else could pull this off.

Christine: And this is her area of expertise. I do like going into, you know, each of their areas of expertise in different episodes. It's nice to kind of- Parker's role for a while as we did in yours and Geoffs.

John: That was kinda fun in Gone Fishing, you're in Eliot's world. 

Christine: Absolutely.

John: Eliot- if you're gonna be running around the woods with people trying to kill you-

Christine: You wanna be with Eliot.

John: Yeah, exactly.

Christine: It's true, if you were gonna be in an auction house, you wanna be with Sophie.

John: Exactly. This was fun, this was-

Christine: Tim, looking dapper.

John: Exactly. And interesting- I had actually pitched this originally, when you were breaking this, but actually happening in the mens room.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And then- 

Christine: We couldn't find a good location, so we had the mens room lounge. This is like the right outside of the toilet.

John: As one does!

Christine: As one does.

[Laughter]

John: Absolutely. Also you can rough a man up in a lounge and people won’t pay attention, in the mens room, it’s expected? I don't know-

Christine: It's England, you expect Michael Caine to walk in and gut punch somebody, come on.

[Laughter]

Christine: Come on.

John: Michael Caine, great in an interview, the best advice about playing a villain I ever heard, which is the scarier the guy is, the softer he talks.

Christine: Oh I love that. Well Frain’s definitely got that down.

John: Yeah, Frain’s playing that. It's really is- he has no need to threaten someone because he is, himself, threatening.

Christine: And by the way, there's no nicer person in the world.

[Laughter]

John: Than James Frain?

Christine: Nicest guy in the world. And completely menacing.

John: Yeah, I love the way he picks up the physical cues. Coming up with the physical cues was fun.

Christine: That was fun. Ok, so this is where we went off and we worked on two different scenes.

John: Yes.

Christine: That had to connect, and we basically wrote exactly the same thing.

John: The same scene, yeah exactly.

Christine: Which was- made me feel like I learned something. I feel pretty good, you know.

John: It was- you know, the writers know this show by now. 

Christine: Yeah.

John: You know, and also I would say, temperamentally, you and I are probably the most similar- 

Christine: Mhhm.

John: Style-wise.

Christine: Yes. We’re both haptic, we like, you know, we like using all the senses, but having the object in your hand?

John: Yeah.

Christine: That's what this episode is about.

John: Exactly. And the- also that was kinda fun was coming up with, when we were first breaking it, trying to figure out what Hardison's job was.

Christine: Yeah.

John: And coming up with Hardison- that Hardison became- hacked history. That was-

Christine: That was-

John: That's my favorite part of the episode.

Christine: That's your most shining moment right there, by the way. That he hacked history.

[Laughter]

John: Thank you. That’s- we just, it- we’re kinda talking inside here, because of the nature of scheduling, Boylan and I wound up working on this one a little bit more cause I'd come back from directing-

Christine: Absolutely.

John: The other episode, and so I was out of the loop on another episode so I ended up jumping in on this one.

Christine: It was not a huge [unintelligible] with this one.

John: And also, you did back to backs.

Christine: I did, I did.

John: You were actually producing-

Christine: Yeah.

John: And being on set for-

Christine: Three-Card Monte.

John: Three-Card Monte. So I actually wound up hanging out and doing a little bit of the research before you came back, and you came back, I'd crunched a little bit of this.

Christine: Yeah. And it helped that it was this one, because at least I had done all that work, like, prior to going to Portland.

John: No, that's the thing - you had broken the plot, and just left me with the all the little research-y bullshit to come up with. Which I love doing.

Christine: You do.

John: I love- part of the fun for me in the show is finding everything out that's true that we can put on the air that people don't believe. She's amazing in this scene.

Christine: She's amazing. The two of them? Wow.

John: Yeah. Look at that kinda- she's a totally different human being here - that kinda bored, looking off a little to the left, the little head tilt.

Christine: And the genius of Gina, which some people are going to sort of recognize here and some people are not, but the way she slightly alters her accent. Just slightly goes for a more refined, different class.

John: Yeah, just the way she carries herself, the way she's thrown on the little sweater around the- she's wearing a knockout dress and by putting the little wrap on-

Christine: Changes everything.

John: Changes everything.

Christine: And again-

John: And look at that! She looks imperious there.

Christine: Oh, god.

John: You know. And meanwhile, in real life she's a really sweet, kinda goofy, you know-

Christine: Absolutely. ”Ooh Christine, another monologue!” That she had perfectly memorized and performed brilliantly. 

John: Yes, you know.

Christine: Of course.

John: They have to complain.

Christine: Of course. 

John: And again- I will say again, Nate in a chair getting beat up while Sophie runs a con, I have no problem saying this is one of my favorite recurring themes of the show.

Christine: I told Tim it was a dream of mine.

[Laughter]

Christine: Tim really enjoyed this episode, I have to say - he had a lot of fun on set.

John: Now, it's- well, you know, he looks great, by the way. That's a great look with the little- and he's hooked, and he's back in.

Christine: Yeah. And yeah the two of them had a lot of fun with this. Yeah, the hook- I love the walk away and then coming back.

John: Yeah, and also, again, one of the things you can do in third season, but also one of the things we try to reinforce now that she's his peer, when she says, “You know what I'm running here”, and he goes, “Yeah, but it's dangerous.” 

Christine: Right.

John: We don't wanna- don’t need to explain it to you, all you need to know is these two people know each other well enough to know what they're playing-

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And what the risks are. And it's a shorthand between peers.

Christine: Yeah.

John: Does she throw that- was she wearing that necklace in the other scene?

Christine: She was.

John: She was.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: It's amazing.

Christine: It looks different against the black than it does against the- yeah.

John: Amazing how different it looks.

Christine: And that's a fantastic sweater.

John: And Nadine throwing together a great little ensemble.

Christine: Oh, Nadine's amazing.

John: And the evil look there, and this is a bad idea.

Christine: Oh no.

[Christine Laughs]

John: This is a bad idea is one of our- now here's a question. Everyone else is dressed for the weather. Was it hot in that office?

[Laughter]

John: Is there- did he nearly pass out from the heat?

Christine: It sure was! Really hot in there.

John: Was it hot because they were trying to put on the lamps to make sure the gun show was bright enough?

[Laughter]

Christine: It was!

John: I remember-

Christine: I promise certain things!

John: Coming into the writing room, and on the wall it's like, it was you know, the priorities-

Christine: Strip Aldis down to his underwear.

John: The priorities for the episode, and one of them was Hardison in the t-shirt for the fans.

Christine: Yes.

John: Like alright, there you go.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: Aldis not complaining.

Christine: This is my favorite scene ever. [Laughs]

John: Ever?

Christine: Until now.

John: Yeah, there you go. No this is-

Christine: Until the one we’re performing right now.

John: This one right now?

Christine: This one we’re doing right here.

John: This is a great roundy round. This is interesting, this- we don't usually go around the circle on this type of-

Christine: Mhhm.

John: On this type of scene. But we were not in our usual set.

Christine: Yes.

John: So this table kinda demanded this geography.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And giving- again, Sophie, this is competence porn. This is pure competence porn.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: Giving Sophie the ability to instruct everyone else, ‘You’re in my world, these are the rules.’ And yeah, and then coming up with the physical aspect of exactly why the, you know, why the statue was unfakeable.

Christine: Right.

John: Absolutely lovely.

Christine: Why had we failed, how can we succeed, basically.

John: And now- and then, I think it originally started with a knighthood.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And then when we were doing the research we had no idea knighthoods were so cheap.

Christine: [Laughs] Knighthoods are pretty cheap.

John: Knighthoods - twenty six hundred. We actually used the line in the show. And it was just deep in the guts of doing the research we spent some time on the royal boards, and there are actually forums and websites of people dedicated to watching royalty. And not just famous royalty, but keeping track of the second cousins, and the third cousins.

Christine: Oh yeah.

John: And the people who are, you know, dukes four times removed. And that was fascinating!

Christine: Mhhm.

John: The idea that like, for example in New York, there are- there's royalty walking around that you would not recognize in any way shape or form.

Christine: Oh yeah. They have jobs, they live on the upper east side, they're, you know, wherever.

John: Yeah and they're, you know, seventh in line to succession someone.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And that was- and that led us to the lost baronies.

Christine: Yes.

John: The lost- and-

Christine: And there are so many we thought about planting some of our-

John: Yes, exactly. 

[Laughter]

John: It didn't really look all that hard to tell you the truth.

Christine: Just don't tell them we’re Irish. It’s fine.

John: Yeah.

[Laughter]

John: Don't tell them they're Irish. They don’t understand the horror of what's going on.

Christine: Smelling the statue.

John: Smelling the statue. And it was also a very nice beat you did here by giving each person- separate person a clue, so it wasn’t static.

Christine: Mhhm, yes.

John: And again, one of the things that the third season, discovering stuff during the scenes, makes exposition part of the conflict more. And I'll say this- no one comes to a show the best writer they are. You know, we definitely- the first season and second season were great, but I look back at them now and realize they gave us tools to do, you know, some great stuff in third season.

Christine: Completely.

John: Yeah. 

Christine: I'm constantly- I just learn on the job. I don't know what I'm doing on any given day.

[Laughter]

John: Well that's you. I'm talking about other professional writers.

Christine: Oh other professional writers.

John: You are-

Christine: Well I-

John: I'm basically stunned you're working.

Christine: I just walk in saying like, “Hey, look at this great statue. Let's do a-” [Laughs]

John: Yeah, exactly.

Christine: I mean, you know, all joking aside, having the audience as involved as possible is one of my constant goals. I want the audience to be a little- not even a little bit ahead, a little bit behind, but there.

John: Yeah.

Christine: Present, you know?

John: You like a lean forward episode.

Christine: I do like a lean forward episode, you know, there's nothing worse than being spoon fed information.

John: Yeah. I'm going to give a giant shout out to the greatest antiquities crime show of all time, Ian McShane in Love Story.

Christine: Oh, yeah.

John: For giving us some of the ingredients on that list.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: Because I'm pretty sure when we were breaking this it was like, “And here's the Love Story moment.”

Christine: Absolutely, yeah,

John: I remember being boggled when I was a kid watching that show like, ‘You can do this? Really?’ And, you know, we talk a lot about the influences on the show but Love Story is not not in the canon. It’s-

Christine: No, it's not.

John: It's in there, it's a big part of it.

Christine: Well I was also thinking because, you know, we had watched Three-Card Monte, and I'd written a little more investigative stuff this year, and I think it's because you made me watch Jonathan Creek.

John: Yes!

Christine: There was a lot of Jonathan Creek going on when I wrote this one, so.

John: Yeah. You know what, there's a lot of good stuff up there.

Christine: Yes, a lot of good stuff out there.

John: It’s people.

Christine: Most of it coming from Britain.

[Laughter]

John: No, well no. No, I mean it’s- we’re about to go on a giant side thing. Every country makes great television.

Christine: It's true.

John: They just don't export the bad stuff.

Christine: You know, well said. Well said.

John: Yeah, no, Jonathan Creek, created by David Renwick - great show. If you have a chance to get our DVD, and then get your friends to get our DVD, but then go get Jonathan Creek.

Christine: Go check that out.

John: Yeah.

Christine: Also a great show.

John: Also Millicent, great job here making a very static scene be fraught with parallel.

Christine: She's not afraid of the long scenes, John.

John: Yes. Long scenes are death in television, Christine.

Christine: Long scenes can be amazing as long as they have, you know, breaths and moments in fits and starts.

John: We actually talked about this one one of the other commentaries where the wonder twins were saying to Marc, “God, this scene is so long.” And he went, “No, directors love this! Gives us a chance to park the camera and work with the actors.”

Christine: There's an arc in the scene.

John: There is an arc in the scene. And that's the trick is writing is fractal. We get very geeky when it's just you and me.

Christine: I know, I kinda miss this, we haven't done this in a while, it’s fun.

John: Yeah, writing is fractal. Every show has a three act structure, every act is a three act structure, every scene has a three act structure.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: And, you know, if there's not a goal-

Christine: Whether it’s three lines or no lines or-

John: Exactly. If there's not a goal and not opposition, then you shouldn't be watching it happen.

Christine: Absolutely. And these two really dug in and it was magic to watch. I mean some of the best times were just sitting there watching them.

John: And I also love when Gina gets to do this, when she gets to do the lean forward hook.

Christine: Oh, man.

John: Because a lot of times she's playing slightly bitter characters, so she can't play the physical intimacy.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: I remember when we did the pilot, and she did the similar thing to Saul Rubinek.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: Who of course has been acting for ages. Saul is one of the best actors I've ever seen in my life.

Christine: Absolutely.

John: And we broke and walked over and Saul was leaning against the railing. I said, “You ok?” He went, “You have no idea what it's like to have the full force of that woman's attention.”

[Laughter]

John: “I just- I need a moment.”

Christine: Mhhm.

John: She's great in this.

Christine: You know, we know why she's the greatest grifter, this is why. And these two. Hilarious.

John: Always hilarious. You cannot go wrong with a Hardison/Eliot scene. Oh and the little throwaway- by the way, this is nice, too, because it's not bickering.

Christine: Right.

John: You know.

Christine: They are working together, and-

John: If you go back and look at the season, you can see that to a great degree, their relationship has evolved.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And when they’re arguing, it’s because Hardison, quite frankly, is doing something stupid or dangerous.

Christine: Right.

John: All Eliot wants to do-

Christine: Well Eliot cares about him!

John: Eliot has wanted to have one job: keep all of these idiots alive.

Christine: Right.

John: That's it. It's just- keep them alive until they get- you know, until they are finished with the con.

Christine: He is the rational center.

[Laughter]

John: Eliot has the best sense of judgment on the crew. I say this constantly. Nate Ford is not good at escape plans.

Christine: No.

John: No. Eliot has the hardest job on the crew.

Christine: Parker can escape, but you know, by herself.

John: This is why I know, by the way, it’s you and I doing this because we're such writer geeks, we’re not really talking about the actors as much as we do on the other ones.

Christine: I know! We really should be!

[Laughter]

John: It's like right now in the internal life of the character.

Christine: Right! So. No, but I will say the Hardison/Eliot stuff- it was nice to have Millicent there. She's directed so many different, you know, various things, but she's also directed a lot of 30 Rock. That helped.

John: Yeah.

Christine: The kinda comic pacing and timing, It worked with the boys’ sensibilities. We had a nice fun set, and stuff moved along at a nice clip. Which is good considering it was a breakneck schedule.

[Laughter]

John: Yeah it's always a break- yeah, it's always horrible.

Christine: As usual, it's a breakneck schedule.

John: No, if you were to play this whole scene back to back it'd be- it’s an act!

Christine: Yeah.

John: It's almost an entire act, isn't it?

Christine: You look at me like I should be surprised at that.

John: Yeah, it's like a ten page scene.

Christine: I am not surprised at all! [Laughs]

John: And now the we think things have gone horribly wrong.

Christine: Janet Penner, she's lovely! Lovely local actress

John: Who's that? I'm sorry?

Christine: Janet Penner, local actress who was wonderful, and imperious in ways. Just, you know, yeah, she scared me.

John: Where do we come up with this twist, that she knew her? I'm trying to remember-

Christine: Well, we had talked about- it’s coming off of the Jimmy Papodakalis thing we'd been talking about earlier that, you know, they've got these personas. 

John: Yeah.

Christine: And to get that deep into a grift-

John: Yeah.

Christine: You know, she'd been running this-

John: Sophie was the long con.

Christine: For a long time. Yeah.

John: Exactly.

Christine: This is a long con.

John: And this is also something that- this is some backstory Gina had given me first year.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: Gina has an entire Sophie backstory in her head. And we talked about how actors prepare, you know, Gina had the backstory. Beth has a little bit, Eliot has a very- Christain has a very detailed backstory. Hardison has a little bit. Tim, it’s very organic, he kinda plays it every year.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And fills in the backstory as he wants to evolve the character. Again, t-shirt really? That warm in that hotel room?

Christine: Uhh, look at all the work he's doing. 

John: Yeah? Really?

Christine: Yes.

John: Good to know. 

Christine: It's England. The AC doesn't work there. Also it’s winter.

John: I didn't know that. Huh.

[Laughter]

Christine: This hotel because it's very old, and it's hot.

John: Oh wow, good way to fill it in.

Christine: It’s not wired for that.

John: I'm just saying.

Christine: You know.

John: If I put Beth in an outfit like that, I’d-

Christine: I would like- exhibit A, Beth's outfit.

John: Oh, there you go.

[Laughter]

John: What's always also fun is we don't often play a Parker and Eliot versus Hardison scene.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: It's usually the other way around.

Christine: That was fun.

John: Yeah, it was a lot of fun just realizing he's a little overinvested. And the big thumbs up! I love the big thumbs up.

Christine: Oh man, hilarious. The IV pole with ink made me laugh so hard.

[Laughter]

Christine: That was a lot of fun to put together.

John: That was great set dec, that was really nice.

Christine: Oh man, they're great.

John: And now a big giant bombshell about Sophie's past; this was a lot of fun.

Christine: In a big giant hat as well. You had to have some big giant hats, or else this whole episode wouldn’t work.

John: Seriously, it's just- this thing is one long-

[Laughter]

John: Working at your subconscious in one long thing in this episode. And now we mention that we both plant the Moreau, remind people about Moreau, also I plant San Lorenzo.

Christine: Yes.

John: Which is important.

Christine: All leading up to the explosive finale.

John: The explos- wow. That- you really sounded like an announcer.

Christine: [Laughs] I can do a sound bite, I can do it.

John: There you go. I love how Tim’s playing this revelation. He's not being judgemental-

Christine: No.

John: But he's finally- he's got a giant chess set in his head of trying to put together Sophie's life, and this falls in.

Christine: Oh, yeah.

John: You know. It was tricky to figure out how to make sure it wasn't her name. And it was actually Gina who gave us the answer.

Christine: Yes, absolutely. And this is why you have to have intelligent actors to work with, who can participate.

John: Because we had this great bit and it was all “How do we write around her never saying her real name?”

Christine: Right.

John: And it was all this sort of dancing, and then Gina said, “Well it’s my stage name.”

Christine: Mhhm.

John: You know, she met me when I was an actress, and-

Christine: It's perfect.

John: Thank you so much.

Christine: And there was a lot of discussion about the lines of succession, and the royal houses, and yes, ours are a little bit- these are the royal houses in the Leverage-verse.

[Laughter]

John: Yes. There was a slight- there was a slight hiccup in the Edwardian succession that really- 

[Laughter]

John: It changed the Leverage-verse history slightly. Also zeppelins. Which you don't usually see cause we don't shoot the sky.

Christine: Yes. Also steampowered things.

John: This is- Leverage-verse is a little steampunk.

Christine: It is a little steampunk-y.

John: You hear- you see the great thing I heard the other day I put it on the- steampunk is what happens when goths discover brown.

Christine: Ohhh, wow.

[Laughter]

Christine: That's fantastic. 

John: Great- is that another white scarf? That is gorgeous.

Christine: Yeah, look how nice.

John: That is a great outfit.

Christine: Look how nice. He really, you know, he just looked great. [Laughs] Between takes I'm like, “Tim, beautiful.”

John: I know.

Christine: Beautiful. He enjoyed wearing nice clothes.

John: And then we had the full- this one, again, could be two episodes crammed into one.

Christine: I don't know what youre talking about. [Laughs]

John: We do a thing at the airport, and then we do a blown con, and then we do a hook-

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And we forge an antiquity, and now we steal an auction.

Christine: Right.

John: And we’re in act three.

Christine: Yes. I mean we bury the real bait inside the thing.

[Laughter]

John: Yes, exactly. No, and it was a lot of fun too, was coming up with the way that fourth act paid off.

Christine: Yes, brilliant.

John: That was nice.

Christine: That was- that was-

John: We’ve been wanting to do that for a while- well we'd been wanting to do that for a while, because Russian icons always kinda fascinate me.

Christine: Yes.

John: The idea of art that doesn't look like art.

Christine: Oh, is this something you're obsessed with?

[Laughter]

John: No not obsessed, just I have a big-

Christine: Super interested in.

John: Chris Downey calls it my big doctor's bag of bullshit.

[Laughter]

John: I have a giant doctor's bag of just random stuff that I've picked up from being odd. I also love that- just the- him drying it.

Christine: Oh man, manicure dryer.

John: The manicure dryer. Great bit.

Christine: They- the props, oh my god it's just- oh my god. Props and set dec working together to create genius in that whole sequence.

John: And that's great, all you have to do is pan across one- just one car with the steering wheel on the wrong side and you're in London.

Christine: That’s all you need, you're in London, look at these toughs.

John: And having been to London, by the way, yeah that's pretty much what it looks like.

Christine: I mean, Portland giveth.

John: Portland giveth. I also love the- this is kind of a callback to the overly loquacious villain in The Future Job.

Christine: Little bit.

John: A little bit.

Christine: Little bit. [Laughs] A little bit.

John: This may be related to, occasionally, when I drink the room I go into the villain speeches.

Christine: Yes, and they're long!

[Laughter]

John: They're long. They're long villain speeches. I think villains have rich internal lives.

Christine: Also, we like British thug movies. We like these kind of, you know-

John: Yes, exactly, this is where the show becomes snatched. Just for like-

Christine: A little bit.

John: This side of it.

Christine: Kinda love that.

John: Also we got the ‘very distinctive’ joke back.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: Which I always love. 

Christine: Yeah, that worked out really well. And Ollie and Christain had a good time with those-

John: Yeah.

Christine: With all those takes and- hilarious for us.

[Laughter]

John: And now the stall. It's tricky, it's one of those things where the audience- television is tricky in that shows really are- the fates of shows- you generally know what's gonna happen in a show. And so trying to figure out how to create obstacles without them being schmut bait.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: You know, is it a stall? Is it really something going wrong?

Christine: And there are moments that just rest entirely on Sophie's ability to charm the pants off of him.

John: Yes.

Christine: And it works!

John: It works, absolutely. Yeah, and then she drops back into the other character. No, it's lovely.

Christine: Just so easily.

[Silence]

John: We’re doing that thing where we just watch the episode.

Christine: Yeah, it's really good, right?

[Laughter]

John: I hate when that happens.

Christine: Ah, I love that angle, and this.

John: Yeah and this.

[Laughter]

Christine: Also fun.

John: Honing door rule by the way - if we can avoid it, we never show Parker arriving in a scene.

Christine: Right, she appears like a sprite.

John: Ye- like a sprite? Really? I was gonna say ghost or wraith-

Christine: Sprite! Sprite’s are terrifying.

John: This was fantastic!

Christine: Oh.

John: We had like a whole mini con set up, and- how did we- how did that happen?

Christine: Ok, that was a joke- you know what? That's my husband's joke.

[Laughter]

Christine: That's weird! Yeah, it was a joke that Eric and I-

John: We should say Chrisitne got married, like, three days ago.

Christine: I got married a couple days ago, yeah. It's a joke Eric and I had thrown back and forth, and I believe he had made to you. We were having dinner with Wil Wheaton one night, and he made that joke in the parking lot.

John: That's right.

Christine: And we had been bantering it back and forth and then I'm going over the script and I thought, “Ooh, right here!” And he said, “Yeah, use it! Do it!” I said, “Wait, is that somebody else's?” He said, “No, I think that's ours! Or mine! Or somebody’s!”

John: All good things come from Wil Wheaton.

Christine: So there you go, yeah.

John: There you go. So if you wanna write, Wil Wheaton.

Christine: Go have dinner with Wil Wheaton, and he will inspire you to great jokes.

John: And if he says he's busy, just don't listen to him. Just break into his house and have dinner with him and good things will happen.

[Laughter]

Christine: He’ll love- he’ll respond to that.

John: This was a ton of fun.

Christine: Oh man [Laughs]

John: This came out of the original scene where she said, “Ooh, the last time I saw you was in The Louvre.”

Christine: Right!

John: The idea of Parker doing an auction of stuff that she at some point had her hands on? Lovely.

Christine: And it comes back to, you know, the theme of these are objects you can touch. These are objects that she has touched and moved at some point.

John: Well, it- also we had talked about the idea, we had had to create Parker's living space for episode five, and the idea that just in the darkness past that, there's just piles of this stuff!

[Laughter]

Christine: Yeah!

John: She has priceless artifacts sitting in a warehouse in Boston.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: Because she likes having them.

Christine: That's right, why not?

John: And then we wound up paying it off in Ho Ho Ho when that's the stuff she hangs on the Christmas tree.

Christine: They do pay off the storage units.

John: We do, the storage units-

Christine: Full payoffs.

John: I have a storage unit, so I know how-

Christine: So do I.

John: Oh you have a storage unit now?

Christine: I do. I'm a married woman now; I have a storage unit.

John: Exactly, had to move all your stuff.

Christine: How else to lure the young unsuspecting-

John: No, don't! Don't go there!

[Laughter]

Christine: Boxes of comic books! Into your storage unit!

John: Oh, I was thinking of another one.

Christine: Oh.

John: And I love- you know what? We talk about the different moods of the actors, Aldis’s ability to make Hardison convey that no one appreciates he's a genius is just great.

Christine: Ohh.

John: It's my favorite recurring bit on the show. That's a great shot, by the way.

Christine: Ooh, ooh, great shot.

John: That's a gorgeous shot. 

Christine: Sexy. Wow.

John: I wouldn't have thought of that shot in a million years, that's really nice that light coming through.

Christine: She really uses the room, and she and Dave Connell worked really well together to design these shots.

John: Also a good reminder that Hardison is not necessarily the most athletic guy in the world.

Christine: Right.

[Laughter]

Christine: He looks really good, but he's not out there running all day long like Eliot is.

John: He's not- yeah. 

Christine: Finding the right pair of glasses, that was a lot of fun..

John: Yeah.

Christine: Some were too insanely comic, some were too serious, these were perfect.

John: And his frustration- just take the damn thing! I'm sick of your toying!

Christine: Yeah.

[Laughter]

John: Yeah, and that's, you know, one of the reasons I think he wants to- that character wants to run his own crew is he’s sick of, you know, he's sick of being unappreciated.

Christine: Mhhm absolutely. Well it's- when you're the youngest person in a group, it can be- it can be difficult.

John: Yeah. And the little tap, the little little push, yeah paying off the NLP and the other stuff. This was great.

Christine: Oh, he's lovely.

John: Casting- how is he referred to in the script?

Christine: [Laughs] What did we call him? Pretentious…something?

John: Yes, he's like eurotrash.

Christine: I- he said, “How do I play it?” I said, “Like a Whit Stillman character.” And not a lot of people knew who I was talking about.

[Laughter]

Christine: Cause he's quite young, this actor.

John: The pink shirt really lands it.

Christine: The pink shirt really, yeah. And he was lovely.

John: And then again, the same thing, trying to create an obstacle in order to-

Christine: American fop?

John: American fop! I think it was that.

Christine: I think it was American fop.

John: And this was interesting, too, one of those things where we were trying to figure out- we had to have a problem during the auction, and so why would there be a problem? Well, we had to create one, we had to create an obstacle for the other character, which meant we had to create parameters. Parameters gave us the $250,000. 

Christine: Mhhm.

John: It's amazing how much you work backwards.

Christine: Yeah.

John: You know, you work backwards from the conflict, and come up with the rules for the conflict and around the most interesting version.

Christine: And then it feels like the most natural thing in the world. 

John: Yeah.

Christine: Which is a great moment. Many scotches later.

[Laughter]

John: Many scotches.

Christine: Oh the storage unit!

John: Mostly Irish whiskey this year. Ah, the storage unit. And again, this was fun because really trying to figure out- we had originally broken this to be on the docks.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And then when budgetary constraints said perhaps we could not go and fake up the docks of London, we went back to the ending of the season one finale, where we established that she had the storage unit and that she was- it was one of many.

Christine: Yeah, why wouldn't she have many all over the place?

John: Yeah.

Christine: Smells the book.

John: We use all the parts of the buffalo.

[Laughter]

John: And the little bit of joy there. The little- the victory lap, yeah.

Christine: He made that from nothing!

[Laughter]

Christine: It is one of my favorite things I've ever written if I do say so, was the “I have gone from apprentice to journeyman to master.” And he did such a good job [Laughs] on that!

John: He really did.

Christine: Cause it was the- it felt very analogous to the writer's career.

John: Well, it was very- he really dug in on the mania of it.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And then Sophie being left behind. Now-

Christine: Yeah.

John: I always wondered, did we- was an integral part of the con? No, he bailed on her.

Christine: No, he bails on her. Cause, I mean, you know, scorpion’s a scorpion.

John: Yeah. Exactly.

Christine: [Laughs] Always count on a scorpion to be a scorpion.

John: Also, I remember we had a long discussion about exactly what- how she would feel about this moment. I mean, on one hand, it's getting her off the hook, on the other hand, it's kinda a painful reminder exactly why she became a grifter.

Christine: Absolutely. And that's the part I wanted to deal with, was the latter. Because this persona’s taken a lot of beatings.

John: Yeah.

Christine: She had a hard time with this. With this long con, and revisiting it is not something I think she thought she would ever do.

John: Yeah. And that's the mistake you make, you get too close to Eliot with a gun.

Christine: Mhhm. Oh, oh sad.

John: And the out. You can never go wrong on an act out with a guy drawing a gun.

Christine: Take the gun out!

John: Now, he's drawing on Eliot so we all know how this is gonna end. But the fun was coming up with a creative way to beat the hell out of three guys.

Christine: Oh, yes.

John: Belt fu! First time we've done belt fu.

[Laughter]

Christine: Belt fu!

John: First time we've done that. That was-

Christine: But he does try to explain first. [Laughs]

John: Yes it's like he’s- actually grown to like this guy-

Christine: Yeah!

John: And would prefer not to beat the hell out of him.

Christine: They have a professional respect, but you know, the job’s gotta be done. There you go.

John: Yeah. And the belt!

Christine: Mhhm.

John: This came out of, I think, the big bag of old Jackie Chan writing.

Christine: This was- yeah. Mhhm

John: This- I think we use this on a Jackie Chan animated episode.

[Laughter]

John: I think I went in there. No, this is a great fight actually. And the snap! That's gotta hurt.

Christine: Oh man. And it's funny. I do say that action’s not my strong suit, but fights I love.

John: You do love a good fight. 

Christine: I love fights.

John: Well, you know, what if they had swords, you'd be the happiest girl in the world.

Christine: Absolutely! Well ‘cause fights are about character.

John: Yes.

Christine: Fights are all about character.

John: How someone fights, how they handle the geography, the choices they make-

Christine: Absolutely.

John: How they escalate violence. It's one of the things we talk about with Eliot, we never try to give him just a fight scene, he always has an attitude on the fight scene.

Christine: Mhhm.

John: And hoisted by your own petard, sir.

Christine: Ohhh

John: Hoisted by your own petard.

Christine: Basil Harris, local actor, nice guy.

John: Oh yeah, no really- nice guy, nice performance.

Christine: Yeah, he's really good, right? But he's really-

John: And this looks sufficiently different from the other airport.

Christine: Look at that! This was late at night. [Laughs]

John: How late?

Christine: Very late.

John: Yeah. We tend to go a little late.

Christine: Those were late days.

John: No, coming up with- it’s interesting, it's one of the recurring themes of the show- that's me rubbing my face, by the way, cause my voice went weird cause lord, I'm tired of doing this.

[Christine Laughs]

John: Is how you move stuff.

Christine: Yeah.

John: How you move stuff- when we did Rashomon Job, at one point we had four little paper cups with different things simulating the object moving around.

Christine: Oh yeah.

John: You know, it's a lot like- it is- you know what? That's why, I suppose you watched Jonathan Creek, it’s like a magic trick.

Christine: It's a magic trick, yeah.

John: It’s a magic trick. And no, it's a lot like designing a magic trick from the ground up.

Christine: Yeah. 

John: And-

Christine: And again, it's the physical object of it all.

John: Yeah. And we talk about this actually on another commentary when we did Scheherazade Job, it’s like when you do a high concept episode, you need- when you do a heisty episode, you need something you can hold.

Christine: Oh yeah.

John: Like it was diamonds for that one. You need very clean simple goals.

Christine: Mhhm. The audience can track.

John: Alright, this actually- you wrote this.

[Laughter]

John: At a ridiculous time of night. At a ridiculous time, and you wrote the whole, “What's all this, then?”

Christine: “What's all this, then?” Come on, I did that on purpose!

John: Which- on purpose. And you gave me the draft and I laughed my ass off. I'm like, “Now you're screwed, cause it's staying in.”

Christine: Of course!

John: And is the classic Monty Python- that is the classic 1930s stage show arrival of the cops.

Christine: Of course!

John: Really mandatory.

Christine: Absolutely mandatory.

John: For the arrival of the police.

Christine: I write to make you laugh, sir.

John: Thank you.

Christine: I write to entertain you. Look! Look, she's ok!

John: She's being reunited with this lovely- her aunt and uncle.

Christine: She's gonna go live in New jersey!

John: Oh that's great.

Christine: It's fine!

John: She's got an education, maybe go to Stanford.

Christine: Aww, that's great!

John: She's got a beautiful future because-

Christine: She's gonna go fight for women's rights in the middle east, it's gonna be wonderful!

John: Exactly, because of our horribly immoral, immoral, crew.

[Laughter]

Christine: Yay bad guys! Who are good guys! Yay!

John: Yay!

Christine: Also-

John: It gets a little fuzzy at the end of the season this year.

Christine: Having Eliot speak Arabic, super hot. On a list of hot things.

John: It's interesting-

Christine: Languages you didn't know they knew, but you assume they knew.

John: Always interesting doing the commentaries with a female writer. 

[Laughter]

John: There's a lot of stuff I didn't know we did just cause it was hot.

Christine: The ladies do things that are super hot.

John: No, no, I'm very scrupulous.

Christine: Everything Gina does in this episode is hot.

John: Yes, but that's because she's hot. That just happens.

Christine: Yes, correct.

John: No, this is a great walk away and a great acknowledgement of- and the great ‘Screw you that you don't really know my name.’

Christine: Mhhm. Millicent came into, you know, she was- it was her first episode, she directed the hell out of this.

John: Oh I could not be happier. This feels- and there's- yeah, she's actually handling the dog tags!

Christine: Mhhm. yes.

John: There, which are- which do not- which are blank. And we wound up- although the audience doesn't know they are blank, the crew does. It's interesting she was actually playing to the cast at that moment, not the characters. We wound up writing it into the Ho Ho Ho Job, because Gina came up with the idea that she wears blank dog tags so we wrote it into an episode.

Christine: That's great.

John: Great. This is the only time I think ever, other than the two part season finale, we hint at the next episode.

Christine: Mhhm. That was fun hinging-

John: Yeah. There was a lot of- there’s advantages to serialization, you're always tempted, it just carries momentum forward. I love Parker's smile at the end of that. That’s-

Christine: That was a lot of fun!

John: That was your last episode for this season.

Christine: That was my last episode for the season.

John: You did a great job.

Christine: It was a fun season.

John: I hope you enjoyed that. This is John Rogers.

Christine: This is Christine Boylan!

John: And stay tuned to put another DVD in, because it is a lot more, including explosions.

Christine: A lot more.