#A LOT has happened in the last couple of years and I'm coming to realize it's not just the Genshin brainrot keeping me away from here

[rcmclachlan]

fanclub dues (bucktommy, tommy & maddie friendship)

Buck's just pulling into the parking lot when the realization that he left his recertification paperwork on Tommy's kitchen counter hits him like another lightning strike, and he drops his head to the steering wheel with a whine. His cert expires today and absolutely has to be postmarked by noon or else Bobby's going to decapitate him, or worse: be really disappointed in him.

His first instinct is to call Tommy, because Tommy's starting a lovely stretch of 72 hours off, and if Buck called him he would absolutely drive the packet over.

Except Tommy's spent the last week reminding Buck to mail the stupid thing before the postmark deadline. If he calls and asks, Tommy won't say I told you so, but he will pause for a second like he's thinking about it before he tells Buck it's no problem. Which is in the exact same pantheon as Bobby's disappointment.

So, he does the next best thing.

"Actually, that works out, because I'm going to be in that area anyway," Maddie says. He can hear the rush of wind and traffic over the line. She must already be driving. "You know how we got on the waitlist for that kindergarten I was telling you about? Looks like a spot is going to open up next year and they asked me to come in for a tour."

Buck frowns. "You're already talking about kindergarten?"

"Jee's four, Buck," Maddie says long-sufferingly. "Kindergarten starts next year."

"That's insane, and also illegal. Tell that girl to stop growing or else she's getting arrested. I know a cop who would absolutely do it, no questions asked."

Maddie laughs, which makes him grin at his reflection in the rearview like an idiot. It always feels like he's won something when he manages to make her at least crack a smile, even when they were kids.

He thanks her profusely, texts her Tommy's address, and then rides that wave of joy right into the station, which continues to carry him through the first couple of hours of his shift.

Around 10:00, his phone chimes with a message. Just pulled up! Front of the house looks great! :-) :-) :-)

Buck smiles down at his phone. He helped plant the flower beds last weekend, and even though he's still finding bits of mulch in weird places because Tommy had pressed him back into the dirt and kissed him filthy in broad daylight in full view of his street, until their smiles got in the way, he can't argue with the end result. They do look good.

This little handoff probably will only take five minutes. Tommy still feels a little awkward around Maddie for reasons Buck cannot fathom for the life of him. Maddie is the kindest, coolest person on the planet, and she's so happy that Buck is happy and Buck is happy because of Tommy, so there shouldn't be any sort of weird vibe. But this is the first time Tommy's ever been in a relationship that made it to the stage where he gets to meet the family and he's so terrified of leaving a bad impression that it's translated into him acting like a robot whenever she's around.

It's maybe a little mean of him to send Maddie to Tommy's literal doorstep. He can just picture the deer-in-headlights look on Tommy's face when he opens the door, but Buck figures exposure therapy can only help. The more Tommy sees Maddie, the more he'll hopefully relax. Small moves.

Maddie will probably send a text in another few minutes about her ETA, but then the bells go off and Buck doesn't give it another thought until a few hours later when they're climbing into the truck to head back to the station.

Unearthing his phone, Buck is expecting a Looks like you're out on a call. I left your stuff on Bobby's desk. See you later!

He's not expecting a video.

Blinking, he checks the timestamp of the message—not twenty minutes ago—and feels the first nibbles of worry in his gut.

What if something happened at the station? What if Gerrard made an unexpected appearance, hoping to, like, challenge Bobby to fisticuffs to get his job back but found Maddie there instead? What if he says something to her, or tries to burn the building down while she's still inside? Maybe she took a video as proof before the ceiling caved in—

He nearly drops the phone trying to press play, and Chim slides in next to him just in time to see Maddie fill his screen.

But instead of evidence of their bitter ex-captain committing arson, it's a selfie video of her in a pair of sunglasses and a cap dancing and singing along to a song Buck doesn't recognize. He does recognize the kitchen behind her, though, because he'd eaten breakfast in it just this morning. There are two bottles of wine on the counter, one empty.

And after a moment, Buck realizes the sunglasses are Tommy's aviators and the pilot cap is the same one Buck accidentally stumbled upon in one of the upstairs closets and made Tommy wear a few nights ago.

But before he can process any of that, Tommy cha-chas his way into the background holding a plate of what looks like sandwiches. He's singing along too. Maddie turns around to look and starts laughing hysterically, the entire screen shaking like they're in the middle of a 9.1 earthquake, when Tommy starts hip thrusting.

Buck's jaw drops. "He said those dorky-ass dance moves were for my eyes only!"

"Wow, I never realized there was a patron saint of FOMO, but here I am sitting next to him. What an honor," Chim says with a laugh, but something in the video must click because his grin is suddenly swallowed by sheer outrage. "Wait, are they having a George Michael dance party without me? Maddie knows how much I love George!"

"What's your definition of dirty, baby, what do you consider pornography!" Maddie and Tommy shout gleefully at the camera.

Chim gasps. "Oh, divorce!"

"What was that about FOMO, Chim?" Hen asks sweetly, but she's grinning so wide at the video—even from her upside down vantage point—that the dig doesn't stick the landing.

Buck looks over at Eddie, who is watching the video serenely, like he's not shocked to see his cool friend full-on shimmying his chest while shoving a grilled cheese into his face.

"Are you not surprised by this at all?" Buck demands.

Eddie shrugs. "If you ever came to karaoke like we keep asking you to, you wouldn't be either. I don't know what you want me to say, Buck. Your man's a dweeb."

He's so annoyed that this is something Eddie's seen so many times before that it doesn't even warrant a reaction that Buck almost forgets to be upset about Maddie and the aforementioned dweeb day drinking and bonding without him. He's oh so glad to see Tommy got over his fear of impressing Maddie enough that he thinks he's allowed to do the fucking running man while in the same room with her.

"C-c-c-c-c-come on!" Tommy howls. Off screen, Maddie cackles and whoops like she's at a rodeo show.

Buck turns to Chimney and says grimly, "After this? You totally get me in the divorce."

Chim makes a face. "Can I contest that?"

"No," Buck says, swiping out of the video before he throws his phone into the street. Almost immediately it chimes with a new text. In a new group chat.

Faxed ur stuff bc ur bf still has a FAX MACHINE and CONNECTIONS at the dir!

Yes and arent uoy glad???1? EVan youre all set baby

BABY lmao gross Going to Jees school now tell u how it goes

When Bobby hauls himself into the front seat, he looks back at them and pauses. Buck doesn't know what his face is doing, but by the dubious expression on Bobby's face, it's nothing good.

"Everything... okay?"

Buck shrugs. "Other than my niece being destined for a career of slinging burgers at In n' Out because my drunk sister and boyfriend are about to get her blackballed from the Los Angeles public school system? We're copasetic, Cap."

'Copasetic,' Eddie mouths, then starts snickering. Buck kicks his foot.

"Hey." Chim smacks him in the chest. "Don't diss fast food workers, they're the backbone of our society. You're just mad you're not cheating Jee out of an education with said sister and boyfriend."

"Aren't you?"

"Well, yeah, but I'm well-actualized enough to simply rise above the betrayal," Chimney says easily.

Hen rolls her eyes. "He's not. Between the two of you, we're going to be hearing about this for the next four years."

"Sorry, Maddie and Tommy are doing what?" Bobby asks slowly.

The corners of Chim's mouth twitch downward. "Dancing to I Want Your Sex. Without me, might I add."

Buck's head turns so fast he hears something pop in his neck. "It's called what?"

"Oh god," Hen mutters. Eddie looks like he's ready to start dozing off.

Buck's gearing up for a really good rant when his phone goes off again, and when he opens the message, it's a selfie of Maddie and Tommy pressed together in someone's backseat—hopefully an Uber's—and grinning so hard it almost looks a little painful.

Jealousy starts to rear its head like a snake, but before it has a chance to strike he clocks the name of the group chat.

The Official Evan Buckley Fan Club.

Be safe out htere! We love you!

"I'm just saying," Chim gripes to a visibly unsympathetic Hen, "Maddie wasn't even a George Michael fan until I made her listen to Hard Day!"

Buck turns to Eddie and kicks his foot again. "Want to join The Evan Buckley Fan Club?"

"Dude, I've been treasurer for like seven years," Eddie says without opening his eyes. "And I cast the deciding vote when Tommy ran for president at the end of last year."

Once upon a time a there lived boy in Hershey, Pennsylvania who never dared to conceive the idea that multiple people might someday love him enough to start a fan club over it.

"You over it yet?" Eddie asks.

Something warm and sweet wells inside him and he ducks his head around a pleased laugh. "Yeah, for now."

He does make a mental note to have a serious talk with Tommy about the proprietary nature of those hip thrusts, though.

[pomshine]

Not that this is any too surprising after my few months of unintentional silence, I'm sure-

Like mentioned in my last post here back in January, I have been trying to get back into using this blog, tidying up my muse list and trying to work things out to make it more comfortable to actually return in full, but this process has only made me realize one huge problem: I've either fallen out of love/interest with most of what I had going on with the muses here, or the muses have just grown so much elsewhere, like Sera, that returning here feels like setting them back more than I'm comfortable with. Adding in the fact this year hasn't been kind to me, including losing a pet two months ago, and I just, at the moment, can't figure out what to do with this blog.

I'd still love to come back and use this blog at some point! However, I have to admit even to myself right now is not the time, no matter how much I keep trying to force it to be. As it is, I've done a muse shuffle so much that the only remaining muses here are Seun and Maika - And I've come to realize Seun is best suited for more slice of life style things while Maika may eventually have something lined up, I'm not sure.

So for the time being, Pomshine is on an indef hiatus, with the intention to come back once I figure out what to do with it - At some point in the future, just not right now. I do know, though, that Sera won't be returning to this blog as anything more than a 'once in a blue moon and by request' muse when I do, and even that is solely for established partners already interested in her, for a lot of reasons - One of which being she has her own blog, now.

If anyone is at all interested in following where I am more active, health and offline stuff permitting, Sera has been fully moved to her own blog, @sakurarisen, and I have a Genshin Impact multimuse over at @thundertide, as well. I'm also in the process of setting up a Honkai: Star Rail OC as a side to Thundertide, and have been getting into doing far more completely original content, so if any of that is your thing, that's where I'll be! <3

Sending all the love~

~Pom

[trillscienceofficer]

from Sci-Fi Universe magazine, October 1996

KISS ME DEADLY: In REJOINED, one of the season's finest episodes, a kiss proved to be more than just a kiss

Maybe it's another sign of format maturity, but the modern Trek era has never seen anything like the controversy that erupted over the airing of DS9's Rejoined, which takes the science fiction story opportunity made possible by Dax's Trill host/symbiont race and twists it into a social comment on sexual orientation Gene Roddenberry would have been proud to call his own.

"Last July," begins Terry Farrell, whose Dax character is at the heart of the story, "Rick Berman called and asked me if I would kiss a woman, and at that point I guess I didn't take it that seriously. I said, 'Yeah, as long as she's beautiful I don't care!'

"And then it spurred me to thinking about it before it actually happened, and I felt bad I had been so flip, because I didn't realize how serious a love story it would be—and how nervous I would be about it, really want to be sure I'm honest and I'm doing the story justice, and I really want people to talk about it and think about it afterward. It really meant a lot to me.

"I think it's really important to love people for who they are, and spiritually it was a great show for me too, because it just reinforces that all of us—whether we want to admit it or not—can really be judgmental at times. That was a really important show to say, to the smallest degree, you've got to remember that people's lives are always so much more complicated than you think they are."

"We had a lot of advance buzz, but we also sat on that show a bit,' adds producer Steve Oster, who recalled the flap in 1969 when Kirk and Uhura made history with television's interracial kiss in Plato's Stepchildren. In fact, the show didn't go looking for attention.

"Because it had a kiss in it, and because of the Roseanne hoopla a few years ago (concerning the high-profile star's on-screen lesbian kiss), our publicity people wanted to have them come over and take pictures of 'the famous kiss scene,' have a news crew like Entertainment Tonight there—and we opted not to do that for a couple of reasons.

"For one thing, because we didn't want to become the Roseanne issue where stations were deciding not to air it, and secondly, to Rick's credit, he did not want to make that what the episode was about. It was not about two characters kissing—it was not about making that a tantalizing factor of the episode."

As directed by Avery Brooks, the episode maintained a remarkably naturalistic feel through the acting of all concerned, including Farrell and guest star Susanna Thompson.

"They chose to play it as real, as we would any other scene with those emotions going on: not 'Okay, a girl is going to kiss a girl,' but it was 'This is someone you were in love with before and you still are,' and that's the arc of the scene. It was not about the kiss," says Oster.

"I think we were trying to be as realistic as possible," Farrell agrees. "Really, the only scene I remember going way out and pulling back was the last scene were I give her the ultimatum—where Avery let me basically go all out and cry my eyes out and then pull me back. So that was the only time I remember going from one extreme to the other, trying a range; otherwise it was pretty natural."

In fact, the scene with Sisko was one of the easiest to play, she revealed, because of the natural affinity she feels tor Brooks, the actor. "He was so supportive of me during the first year of DS9 when it was really difficult for me, he was the only one who reached out and really made me feel comfortable, and tried to help me build my self-confidence and self-esteem in really healthy way," she says. "So I felt like I didn't need to do a lot of homework."

Farrell reveals that, in fact, the hardest scene for her as an actress was the moment in which Dax and Lenara Kahn realize at dinner, without voicing it directly, that they are still in love. Aside from the new situation of seeing Dax giddy like that, Farrell recalled it was the first day of shooting on the episode. "I felt a little uncomfortable and was feeling nervous about the whole thing," she says, "and I remember trying to make her comfortable at the same time."

The chemistry that sparked between Farrell and Thompson—finally out from under the makeup as a Romulan and Tilonian, both on TNG [on The Next Phase and Frame of Mind respectively]—came as no accident, since the producers had taken pains to have Farrell read with those who came in during casting for the role.

"We auditioned and auditioned and auditioned," Oster reports. "We needed to find that chemistry, someone who can play that role as a human being, not as someone who's wondering about kissing another woman. And if someone has delivered for us, we'll bring them back if they've been in makeup before because that can change."

"And," agrees Farrell, "we made sure we had a meeting before we started the show—Susanna and Avery and I—to discuss the show. Usually we don't have time for those kinds of things to happen on our show, but they just made the time. And it really made a difference, I think."

Before the show aired, executive producer Rick Berman said he hoped it would be "received with some controversy."

"I think it does deal metaphorically with homosexuality in the sense of how society puts taboos on certain sexual orientation," Berman said. "It deals with it from both sides, I believe. And I'm sure there are those in the gay community who will probably feel that, again, we haven't gone far enough. But our objective in this story was very specific and very related to the big points that are exhibited in the story—it was never designed to be 'how far can we push this?' It's another step in our attempts to supposedly open stories that deal with a variety of sexual orientation [sic]."

The low-key strategy seemed to have worked: among the affiliates who knew what was coming, Oster reports, none ever dropped the show completely. All ran the episode on first airing—with a parental advisory added by the Atlanta station—and "two or three" others cut the scene out when repeated.

"The studio was very supportive of it; it was one of those things that when Roseanne became the cutting edge and it passed by, it suddenly became not much of an issue."

—Larry Nemecek

"Negative callers couldn't make the leap between seeing this kiss and the famous one between Uhura and Kirk in 1969 as both being a matter of prejudice."

—Producer Steve Oster

[sweetnans]

I'm Still Your Boy

Pairing: f.reader/bakugo katsuki. tw: mention of break up, mention of violence but not described because bakugo isn't a bad boy, soft and persistent bakugo. a/n: a three part sequence between you and this boy who's sorry about letting you go.

You've been gone for a year. Bakugo tried to stay focused on his career and succeeded. He was the number one hero, after all. But you, you never left his mind.

He knows that he made a mistake. He scared the shit out of you the last time he saw you when you decided that the best for the both of you was leaving. And you did.

You made a career in another country, live the life that you never had the chance to live because of him. You were his best friend since you were kids, and then with the hormones, the changes, and the lack of reasoning, you became his girlfriend and that lasted for a few years, stealing all of your firsts.

You didn't blame him at all for taking away all the things that you loved because he was above them. And you didn't mind at all. He started his hero career after UA, trying in agencies, and after a couple of them, he made his own. You were happy for him. You wanted him to find the things that passionate him. But in the process, you lost yourself.

It happened one night, he was exhausted and the two of you started a fight. You said things that you regretted right after, and he became violent, not at you, but at everything that you made together. He had anger issues when you met him, but he never showed them when he was with you. That night, he was tired, and you were emotionally unstable because you had realized days prior that you were stuck and you didn't want your life to be someone's ornament.

So you left him and didn't look back.

Until today.

He knew from the moment that you gave your friends in common the news of you getting back to the landing of your plane. Kirishima wasn't so subtle when he was excited, and neither was Mina. They missed you too.

He has been pacing all day in his office thinking what he could do and how he could approach you without being so flagrant about it. He just needed to grow a pair and make a decision fast. He wanted you back, but he knew that it wouldn't be that easy. He knew that he fucked everything up, but never did anything to compensate his mistakes. He never called.

He, in fact, made a reckless decision that led him to the frontis of your house on a rainy night. The light on the first floor was lit, and he could see the shape of your figure through the blinds.

He could knock and sink in the ground when he sees you again.

You were in your kitchen, rearranging the food in the fridge that you bought earlier that day. You've made the cleaning and your laundry, so you were almost done for the day. The only task lingering in your list was putting the food in the fridge and in the pantry. You also bought some fast food to gain time. Once you were done, you'll go upstairs, cast some netflix, and enjoy it while eating french fries and a huge burger.

You were delusional. You didn't know what was coming.

A noise at the door startled you, making you drop the grapes in the kitchen counter. You could feel the presence of someone else in the house but when you turned around you didn't expect to be him.

"Bakugo," you said, looking at him half disconcerted and half scared.

Not by him, only by the fact that he was inside your house.

"Jeez, still hurts when you call me like that," he tried to dismiss the hurt in his voice by laughing a little. A sad laugh.

"How did you-"

You wanted to know a lot of things. How and why mostly.

"I taught you better than hide your spare key under the mat"

Yeah, that one was totally on you.

"I'll leave it in the flower pot next time." You tried to joke, but the atmosphere wasn't giving.

"And I taught you better than to eat that crap," he said, glancing at your food.

You tried to look offended, but he was right. The truth was that you never got the need to learn how to cook because he did the job just fine, and when he made up his mind about teaching you one thing or two about cooking, you were just used to his food so you never tried to even lit up the stove. When you left, you thanked Bakugo in your mind for teaching you how to cook, but it was a painful thing to do every day. You missed the bastard and hated him for getting you so used to him.

"It's late, what are you doing here?" You said grabbing your kitchen table to feel stable in your feet.

You thought about this moment. A thousand times, but you never imagined to be living it actually.

"I-" he stuttered. It wasn't easy for him either. "I wanted to see you"

"You better have an excuse better than that. You are dripping all over my floor, and I just moped it"

He looked at his boots. You were right. The rain was heavy outside, and he thought about knocking for about thirty minutes before he came with the great idea to home invade you.

"You're right," he said, determined to end his suffer and lift the permanent rock off his chest. "I missed you a lot. I was a fucking douchebag with you before you left. I know that you have made up your mind, but I made it worse. You could've left with me, I should have supported you like you did with me when I started this, " he pointed at his suit. "I was a shitty excuse of a boyfriend when you were everything to me" he sighed. His eyes started to get glossy before he noticed, yours as well.

You dreamed for the firsts months when you were outside the country that Bakugo would show up at your apartment and tell you that he fucked up and how much he missed having you around. You wanted this to happen, but right now, you could feel the turmoil in your head. You didn't know if him saying sorry after a year would change anything.

"I can't go back to what I made you feel, and I know that I fucked everything that we had, including our friendship, but I wouldn't be here if I wasn't sure that you are what I want and that I can make things right again, after all this time" he said after a long silence filled with your sobs.

Your silence made him uncomfortable. In a way that he, for the first time, felt scared. Scared of losing you forever.

"I-" you grabbed your head with your hands while he made his way to you, crossing the kitchen and closing the distance to put one of his fingers under your chin.

You lifted your head to look at him. Everything was happening in those crimson eyes. Every emotion, sadness, fear, expectation, and the most important of all, hope.

"I can't be without you," He needed you. He needed to be yours.

You weren't sure. You were scared, too. You didn't want to get hurt again.

You grabbed his hand, joining his fingers with yours. And made your decision.

"I'm sorry"

He felt his heart sink. It was a possibility, but in his mind, you've missed him the same that he missed you.

He wasn't a man that would accept a no from anyone, but with you, it was different. He told you everything that he needed to tell you, he exposed his heart to you and he was convinced that everything he was feeling, you felt it too.

It wasn't a rotund, no.

That night, after he discarded his damp clothes and laid in bed looking at the ceiling, he remembered the first time that he knew that he had feelings for you. He gave you a shitty speech about his feelings. He was only seventeen, and he was rough, didn't have any tact to tell people mundane things, much less speaking about his feelings. He remembered your face, pretty disconcerted at the beginning, but in the end, you were trying to contain your tears from falling. That time, he didn't tease you for crying. He remembered what cracked you up, the last part of his speech of how much he wanted to be with you.

"Brat, I know nothing about love, but I better be yours."

Part 2

Do not edit or reupload my works elsewhere! All rights reserved.

[averydayss]

Every Summertime𓇼

>>contents: in which you try to make Jay jealous by persuading his bestfriend, Sunghoon

>>warnings: fluff, angst

>>now playing: Every Summertime - NIKI

You and Jay are inseparable, the both of you always had been together since the earliest of moments. This started when both of your moms are close friends, which means you two often meet during their hangout.

Jay's mom has a vacation house that they use every summer, and every year your invited to stay during the summer break. And of course you did, so y/n and jay would stay in the vacation house together

At the age of 10, you started to realize that you had developed some feelings for jay. The reason being obvious, Jay was anything a girl could ever wish for. Handsome, kind, smart, sporty, rich, he is a heartthrob in school

Jay didn't liked you that way though, in his eyes you were a little sister to him since he was an only child. Although both did had a situationship for a couple of months, nothing happened though

That didn't really bother you though, after all you both still spent time almost everyday together.

Jay had his fair share of crushes, you did too. But they never really went as far as being more than that, until at the age of 16 Jay had his first real girlfriend, Yujin.

Yujin and Jay met at one of his basketball games and eventually their relationship bloomed into something romantic

"y/n i have some good news for you" Jay said excitedly. "Really? What is it?" Y/n asked curiously.

"Me and Yujin are officially dating" Jay said

Y/ns heart shattered at the new couple. At first Jay and y/n still was close and Jay even told y/n a lot of stories and things he liked about yujin, which you didn't really want to hear but you did anyway for Jay

One day, you were with Danielle. You both were shopping for clothes and bags, and you suddenly saw Yujin kissing a stranger who doesn't look like Jay at all

Isn't that Yujin?" asked Winter. "Yes i think so"

"You should take a picture so you have proof to tell Jay" said winter. You listened to her and took a picture at the sight

After you were done shopping, you went straight to Jay's house. "Jay, i need to tell you something" said y/n while pulling out her phone and showing the picture. "Your lying, its edited. Yujin would never do that, just be happy for me y/n" said Jay

As time went on though, you noticed that Jay was starting to act quite differently. When you would tag along ur mom to go to his house, he would usually invite you to his room to watch movies and play games. But now he would lock himself in his room until you left.

You wanted to confront him at school, but he would always be with yujin. Yujin always had this evil smirk everytime she sees you. You can tell she didn't want you to be close with Jay anymore

Finally, the chance came when both you and Jay's mom decided to have a small gathering at your place, and Jay was forced to tag along. You took this opertunity to approach him and try to strike up a conversation

"Hey we haven't talked much lately, are you good?" Y/n said. "I'm fine" Jay said shortly, not even looking at you but his phone.

"it's going to be summer break soon you know, are you excited to go to your vacation house together?" You emphasized the last word

"Of course, but this year Yujin asked to come along with us. Is that good with you? You can bring someone too if you want" Jay asked. You were shocked, you wanted to refuse. But after all this is Jay's vacation house. "Why not" you said and excused yourself to find someone else to talk to

By the end of the day when the party is over you rushed to your room to call your friends about it. You told them the problem

"Really? That's so inconsiderate of him" said Chaewon on the phone while painting her nails

"If i were you i wouldn't let that slide" Said Danielle. "I know right!, you should bring some man to make him jealous or smth" said Hanni. "You think i should do that?" Y/n asked. "Yeah, if only you 3 would be in the vacation house then you would obviously be the 3rd wheeler" said Danielle

At first you were against the idea, but the more you think about it the more you started to feel like it would work. But a problem is that who would you pick?

You'd pick Soobin, but he already has a girlfriend. You simply can't do that to someones man. A bright idea came into danielles mind though, Sunghoon. He was a perfect candidate

To start off, he was Jay's best friend, he was also single. But you two never really talked to eachother, sure Jay introduced you both a couple of times but you weren't close to him. Still you wanted to try

Y/n: Hey sunghoon! can we meet up? I want to talk to you about something xx

Sunghoon: Sure, why not

Y/n: Lets meet tomorrow at EnCafe at 2pm?

Sunghoon: of course, see you there

You were surprised on how quickly the man agreed, but this was a good thing,

The next day came by, and when you entered the cafe you found Sunghoon. "Hey, how have you been?" Sunghoon had always liked of y/n since they first met. But he never approached y/n since she was always with Jay

"Hey sunghoon, I've been good what about you?" Y/n asked. "Ive been good, what is it that you wanted to talk about?" Asked Sunghoon

"Well Jay has a girlfriend and you know how me and him usually go to his vacation house every summer? Well he is bringing his girlfriend too this year, i was wondering if you'd come along with me this year so i don't feel like a third wheeler?" Y/n asked with pleadingly

"Sure, are you sure Jay is good with this though?" Sunghoon asked excitedly. "He told me i can bring someone so im sure he is good with you invited, besides you two are close" said y/n. "Well then see you soon" Sunghoon asked while trying to contain his smile wider. And with that you found someone

And with that, summer break came in a flash. Now you were currently packing your suitcase to stay at Jay's vacation house for the summer. You were glad that sunghoon came along so you would still have fun after all.

Sunghoons contact name appeared on your phone, he texted you that he would be picking you up with his new car. You smiled at the message and answered.

When the two of you arrived at the vacation house, Jay was cooking beef at the kitchen while Yujin was busy taking photos to post on her socials.

You and Sunghoon went to unpack. The vacation has about 4 bedrooms, perfect for all 4 of you. Jay texted you that he planned a pool party at his vacation house tonight and told you to join.

When u appeared outside of your room, you saw that Yujin's friends are also staying at the vacation house. Great. You were about to ask Jay about it, of course you were. Jay didn't say anything prior to this

Though the first thing you saw was Jay and Yujin making out by the pool. Gross, you thought. You didn't want to admit it but a part did break in you.

At the same time, Sunghoon saw the commotion and saw your helpless face and decided to approach you

"the others are having a bbq grill thingy, care to join" asked Sunghoon

"No im good, ill just go back to my room"

"U like him right?" Asked Sunghoon suspiciously. Y/n was shocked but tried to keep a straight face. "What makes you think that?" Asked y/n

"Its obvious, you always give Jay love eyes everytime you see him" shrugged sunghoon. "I really dont think its any of your concern" said y/n

"Are you kidding me? Ofcouse it is. First you invited me to the stupid vacation house and now your completely distracted with Jay and his GIRLFRIEND" said Sunghoon angrily

"I didn't mean it that way, i just have a lot on my mind right now" said y/n while massaging her temple

"of course you don't" said Sunghoon sarcastically while storming off

The next day you both avoided eachother, you wanted to apologize but you didn't know how to

"So, you and Sunghoon? That's certainly a surprise" asked Jay while leaning on to the fridge after taking his sprite. "Yeah, i guess so"

"Sunghoon has been kinda off these past few days, did anything happen?" Asked Jay. "We just got in a little fight, nothing serious" said y/n

"do you like him?" Asked Jay. "Why does it matter? I don't think its ur business" asked y/n rudely

"Calm down, i was just curious. Why are you so angry?" Said jay. "Of course i am, i wasn't informed that your girlfriend and her minions will be staying at the vacation house" said y/n angrily

"Princess you know i would have informed you, i was just busy with school" you winced at the old nickname. "Sure you are, im gonna find sunghoon" said y/n

Y/n walked through the hallways and approached sunghoon who was busy reading a book. Sunghoon saw y/n at the door frame and raised one of his eyebrow.

"I wanted to apologize for the things i said a few days ago, im sorry I didn't mean it that way" y/n apologized. "You know I've always liked you, but you were to focused on a guy that already had a girlfriend

"I know, i can't help it that i love him Sunghoon" said y/n bitterly. "You know i can help you with that right? Just be with me and ill make your time worth" said Sunghoon

"Sunghoon, i really don't want to make you a rebound" said y/n. "Just give me a month to prove your time worth it" said Sunghoon pleadingly

"Its fine, you don't have too" said y/n trying to hide her smile. Sunghoon smiled and kissed her temple

A few months went by and Sunghoon kept his promise, he was the best boyfriend you could ever asked for. Caring, sweet, and much more. You couldn't have asked for anything more.

During that one month you weren't as close to Jay than before, he tried to contact you but you would always make excuses

Then one day Jay asked to meet at a cafe, you wanted to refuse but he kept begging until you said yes

"Its been a while" Jay said while sipping his coffee. "What do you want to talk about Jay?" Asked y/n

"Me and Yujin broke up, i found out her real intentions of dating me. Im sorry" said Jay. "You didn't do anything wrong, you don't have to apologize" said y/n while fidgeting her fingers

"I was wondering if you want to be my partner for prom? I've known you for so long and if im gonna be honest you looked prettier than you've ever been this past months

"Thanks Jay, but i already said yes to sunghoon's invitation to prom" said y/n

"I don't get it? I thought you liked me? Why are you now close to sunghoon?"

"Sunghoon's nice, incase you didn't know we are dating" said y/n and stood up from her seat and left the cafe

Since that day y/n blocked Jay and lived a happy life with Sunghoon

💳: divider: @snoozebin Other pictures are from pinterest, credits to all the owners

A/N: Send an ask to be moots

[staarb0y]

Tattoo

request: Can u do one where Nick and male top! Reader fuck because male top! Reader kept teasing him and getting Nick worked up while giving him a tattoo. Oh yea also male top! Reader is a tattoo artist and that’s his job.

pairings: nick x male reader

warnings: praise, public if you squint

summary: You tease Nick while giving him a tattoo and then take him to the back and fuck him.

word count: 1,725

a/n: Yay this is the first request I've written and I have two more to do!! I saw Nicks new ig photo which kinda inspired this aswell.

Your day so far had been pretty quiet. You had a couple people call and book appointments for later in the week but that was it. It was just after your lunch break and still no one had come in, that was until one of the finest guys you had ever laid your eyes on walked in.

"Hey, I'm Nick."

"I'm y/n."

He explained what tattoo he wanted and you two discussed placement. He decided on his thigh and your mind instantly went to how you would get to be on your knees in front of him.

You sat him down on one of the chairs, and got your supplies ready. When you start tattooing normally your brain kind of just goes on autopilot, you kind of just zone out. With your years of experience you don't even need to think about what you're doing it just happens. But not this time, this time you can't help but getting repeatedly distracted by the man infront of you. You keep pretending that instead of looking down at his phone he's looking down at you. 'No, I need to focus.' His legs are so hot though. He's so hot. He was wearing these fucking pink shorts. They rode pretty high up his legs and you could see a lot.

You're about halfway through the tattoo when you realize your resting hand has moved up his thigh without you even noticing. But Nick did. Nick looking down at you, suddenly not on his phone anymore did. He puts one of his hands on yours, and just leaves it there, going back on his phone.

You try to drift back into your focused state but you can't. All you can think about is how his hand is on your hand. You continue with the tattoo when you decide to move your hand. You shift it up his leg, so it's resting pretty high up on his inner thigh, close to his dick. You rub your thumb back and forth on his leg when you look up at him, your eyes immediately meet his.

You look back down and see the bulge in his shorts, noticing he's not wearing any boxers. "You need some help with that, Nick?" You ask, looking at him and then back down to his bulge. He just nods at you turning bright red. You spit into your hand, reaching into his shorts and grabbing his dick, slowly rubbing his tip while you continue the tattoo. He's letting out soft pants and swears under his breath while you try to finish your work.

"Almost done Nick, just hold on for me ok?" He's locking eyes with you and you can tell he's worked up. "If you want, after I'm done here I can close up early and we can go to the back?" You look at him while your fingers wrap around his tip, slowly jerking him off. "Yes, please" He says. "Ok, just let me finish." You can feel his dick throbbing in your hand, and by the sounds of his little whimpers you know you're making him feel good.

You go a little faster on his tip, and you can hear him moaning over the sound of the tattoo gun. "That feel good baby?" You look up at him again, and he's looking down at your hand in his shorts, moaning as you tease him. "Please more, actually jerk me off please," he whimpers. "But I like seeing you all worked up when I tease you, it's cute" You look back down and continue with the tattoo, Nick's whimpers filling your ears. "Fuck y/n mmh." You're on the last part of the tattoo when you start thumbing at his slit, slowly rubbing in circles.

"Ah fuck" He moans out. "Yeah I know baby, almost done ok?" "Mh fuck ok." His head is leaned back against the chair, hands gripping the armrest loving every moment of it. "I'm done. Just let me clean you up and we can go to the back ok?" You wipe off the excess ink on his fresh tattoo, before quickly pulling his length out of his shorts. You lick the drops of precum off the tip of his dick, making sure to go slow, teasing him as you wrap your tongue around his tip. "Mh fuck that feels so good."

You stand up, tucking his dick back into his shorts. You grab your supplies to go put away, "Told you I'd clean you up," you say, turning around and walking away to go put your stuff away. You go to the door, flipping the open/closed sign to closed, and turning off the lights.

"Come with me Nick." He quickly gets up and follows you into the back room. You shut the door behind him and pull him into a kiss. "I know we just met but you're so hot and I really wanna fuck you," you say. He looks into your eyes "Then do it," he says before swiftly pulling you back into the kiss. He's grabbing your hair and you're holding his waist, pressing him against you. You can feel his hard dick against yours and it's so hot.

He pulls away from the kiss and gets down onto his knees infront of you. "Can I give you head before you fuck me?" He says looking up at you. "Fuck yes." He reaches for the waistband of your sweatpants pulling them down quickly. "No boxers huh? Not very professional." He says sarcastically before taking your dick into his mouth. He sucks you down harder and faster than anyone has before, taking you down to the base, nose deep in your pubes before bobbing up and down fast.

"Ah fuck Nick your mouth feels so fucking good."

He looks up at you seeing how much you're enjoying him. "Mmh fuck you should stop before I cum Nick." He doesn't. If anything your words make him work harder on your dick trying to make you cum. You moan his name as you reach for his hair, pulling it gently. "You can fuck my mouth if you want," he says, muffled by your dick in his throat. You pull his hair a little harder and start to move his head for him. He grabs your bare thighs for support as you thrust into his mouth. You can feel his tongue sliding up your length and the way his mouth is tightening around you. You look down at his lips around your dick, the way his eyes are half lidded and mostly shut, the tears forming in them from your dick being in his throat. You speed up the movement on his head, going faster making you feel that familiar feeling in your stomach. You can't think as you cum in his mouth, him moaning around your dick trying to swallow every last drop. He sucks you through your high as your grip on his hair loosens. He pulls off, standing up infront of you.

You waste no time flipping him around and pushing him up against the wall, pulling down those hot pink shorts he was wearing. You reach your hand up to his mouth, putting two fingers infront of his lips, "suck." He quickly opens his mouth and you rest your fingers on his tongue. He closes his lips around you and sucks on your fingers leaving plenty of spit on them. You bring them down to his hole and slowly slide them in, curling them at just the right angle, hitting his sweet spot. "Mm fuck right there y/n please," he moans out. You rub quickly with your fingers, trying to simultaneously stretch him so you can fuck him.

He whimpers at the feeling of being empty when you slide your fingers out, but thats quickly replaced with the feeling of being filled and stretched way more than before when you're pushing your dick into him. He moans softly as you thrust all the way into him. You slowly slide out to your tip, and then roughly fuck back into him. You groan as you fuck him, your thrusts speeding up a bit. He's moaning your name and you're groaning softly into his ear, your thrusts maintaining a quick momentum.

"Yes fuck y/n please harder, fuck me hard"

"Oh is that what you want Nick?" You ask as you fulfill his request, thrusting harder than before, going deep inside him. "Fuck Nick you feel so good, such a good boy taking me so well." You reach infront of him for his dick, grabbing it and jerking him off. "Ah fuck please I'm gonna cum."

he says in between moans and heavy breaths. "Yeah Nick be a good boy and cum with me ok?" "Mhm" he replies back in a half moan. You thrust as fast as you can, grabbing his waist with one hand and his dick with the other. You go as fast as you can on his dick, making him cum all over the wall. You cum into him, riding out your high as you fuck your cum deeper into him. You slow down your pace on his dick, letting him thrust into your hand while he whimpers.

You pull out of him and grab some paper towel, cleaning him and the wall off. You clean yourself off while you watch Nick pull up those cute pink shorts. "Wanna clean up the mess you left on my hand?" You say, looking down at him. "Sorry" He says. He licks his cum off your fingers, and then off your palm. "Fuck you're so hot." You pull him into another kiss, this time lightly pressing your tongue against his open mouth. He seems to accept, wrapping his arms around you, lightly sucking on your tongue as it explores the inside of his mouth. You pull off him and look down into his eyes. He's looking back at you, arms around you hugging you before he says, "I should probably go" "Yeah," you say, walking him out. Before he leaves he grabs a pen off the front desk, grabbing your arm and writing a number on your wrist. "Call me, maybe next time you can take me out for dinner before you fuck me." He says with a smirk before walking out of the tattoo shop.

[mythunderstorm]

We‘ll be okay | DR3

Daniel Ricciardo x reader

summary: It’s normal to argue. You know that. But that doesn’t mean it hurts any less, even tho you know you and Daniel will work it out in the end.

warnings: bit angsty, actually not sure what else to say. Soft ending tho

a/n: i‘m so sorry for not posting a lot atm. I have so many drafts but I can’t seem to finish them. Whenever I try to write it’s like my brain shuts off completely. Not even sure if this is any good but it’s the only thing I was able to complete, so enjoy ig haha

masterlist

Arguments. They‘re normal, every couple has to face them at one point. Some argue more, some less. But it’s normal. They happen, you talk it out, you make up. Normal.

You and Daniel argue. Normal. It doesn’t happen often, but it happens. Normal. What wasn’t normal, is that you had to leave the apartment. It wasn’t normal for him to yell at you like this, both of you throwing words at each other you didn’t actually mean. Not normal.

You had to get out, leave for a bit. Before anyone of you says something you can’t take back at the end.

You wander around, aimlessly. It‘s raining, hard. You didn’t bring an umbrella with you, but you didn’t care. The water droplets on your skin felt kind of refreshing.

Your phone beeped, your boyfriend worries about you being alone, out in this weather at night. He sent multiple messages, telling you to come home.

The feeling of relieve fills your chest, glad that he’s still caring about you, even after the fight. But you ignore his messages, at least for now, needing some space to clear your head a bit. He was really mean tonight, something that basically never happened, not like this. You understand that he’s frustrated, not being able to race this season, but that’s not your fault.

Just because you said that you’re glad to spend some more time with him now, happy to have him to yourself for a while, doesn’t mean you don’t support his dreams and career. You’re proud of him, always have been, always will. But being away from him so much is hard and you really really missed him over the last year.

After a while you stop at a little café that was open late. Exactly what you needed right now. You sat by the window, ordering a cup of tea while watching the rain pour.

Your phone beeps once again.

„I'm really worried about you, the weather forecast said that there will be thunder too, you should really come back home.“

Your thoughts and emotions whirle around your head as you stare out the window.

With a sign, you type back a quick message to let him know you’re safe and not outside in this horrible weather. You may be mad at him but you’re not so cruel to let him suffer and worry about your well-being for the rest of the night.

But a part of you still doesn’t want go back home.

You look around the café, noticing that it is completely empty except for you and the barista. It is quiet, calm, peaceful. No one would be yelling at you here. No one would be blaming you for everything.

At first you just needed a break, now... now you needed an escape.

You look out of the window again, watching the raindrops sliding down the glass. It’s like they’re racing against each other. Even something small like rain on a window reminds you of him. It keeps your mind occupied for a while, watching the water glide around the surface but you’re still thinking about him. You’re always thinking about him.

It’s like the weather mirrors your exact feelings at the moment, like it’s trying to tell you that you’re not alone.

You put your phone aside, not responding to the rest of Daniel‘s texts. His mind was always full with thoughts about racing, training and other things related to his profession. And you understand, he loves his job. And you don’t blame him for that.

But you have feelings too, you have feelings that you want him to acknowledge sometimes. You need him to realize that. To recognize how upset you are and how hurt you feel.

Your thoughts spiraled down deeper and deeper as you watch the rain outside. The water droplets, they look like tears.

You sign again, squeezing your eyes shut for a moment. You know you and Daniel will work it out, like you always do. You love him and you know he loves you. Arguments happen and you understand he’s frustrated, even though it’s not okay for him to put the blame on you. You both need some space, time to calm down before you can face each other to actually talk about it. But you‘ll be okay. Everything will be okay in the end.

The rain starts hitting the window harder than before, making it difficult to see the world outside.

Taking a sip of your tea, you look at the clock. It’s already 1 in the morning. You feel a bit guilty. It's late, really late.

You pick up your phone, hesitating as you look at Daniel's last message. He was panicking about the storm and kept telling you that he was worried. You know him, he's usually not the hysterical kind.

„I‘m inside a Café, don’t worry. I‘ll wait a bit until the storm calms before I come home.“

You think for a moment, not sure if you should send the next text. You want to but.. fuck it.

„I love you.“ you type and hit send quickly, before you can change your mind. But you mean it, because you do. You love him.

A notification appears instantly on your phone. It's a message from Daniel. It reads „I love you too."

Your heart skips a beat. Of course, your love still means the world to him.

You close your eyes and picture his face. When Daniel smiles at you, his eyes sparkle in a way that no one else's eyes could. He's so good at showing his emotions through his eyes…

Ding. Another message.

„Please come home honey, I can't take it another second."

You smile softly at the nickname. You look out of the window again, the storm seems to get only worse. You want to go home, right now. But you know it wouldn’t be the best idea, not in this weather. But you don’t care. You pay your tea, tipping the barista generously, before making an exit to finally get home. To the person you love most.

As soon as you enter your apartment you see Daniel standing there, waiting for you. You lock eyes for a moment, neither of you saying anything... It's quiet. The only sound you hear, is from the rain outside.

Daniel is smiling at you, and he starts walking towards you. He softly puts his arms around your drenched body, pulling you close and kissing your forehead gently. Your heart is pounding in your chest, your face is turning red.

„Sorry“ you whisper into his chest, hiding your face in his sweater. You’re tearing up again, breathing in his scent.

"I should be the one to say sorry." You hear Daniel's voice whispering into your hair as he holds you tight. "I was cruel, I should never speak to you like that. Never." His words are soothing to your ears.

Even though you were fighting badly only hours prior, you felt safe. It has been a long time since you felt this safe. Since you felt this protected.

Just then Daniel takes a step back to look at you, as if he was admiring your face. Then he leans in to kiss you, needing to feel that you’re real. That you’re here, that you came home. The kiss only last a few seconds but it’s soft, gentle and full of love.

Yes. You‘ll be okay.

Daniel's lips on your face feel like heaven and you close your eyes, not wanting to let the situation end just yet... but before you could do anything, his hands reach for your face, gently moving you away. For a second, you were scared to look at him but he's just fixing your wet hair.

"Let's get you warm," he smiles as he guides you into the kitchen, the warm light from the lit oven illuminating your face. You enjoy the warmth for a moment while Daniel was already boiling water for some tea.

„I- I‘ll go change into some dry clothes real quick“ you whisper into the quiet kitchen, watching him move around the room to prepare the tea.

Your boyfriend nods and smiles at you, putting his hand on your thigh and giving it a gentle squeeze. "Go ahead, let me make you some tea" he smiles as he pushes your hair away from your face again.

The kettle whistles, it's boiling. Daniel picks it up and pours the hot water into two cups, putting lemon in both of them. The scent of lemon fills the room, mixed with Daniel's cologne.

You disappear into your shared bedroom, quickly getting rid of your wet clothes, throwing them into the hamper. Grabbing one of Daniels Hoodies, you pull it over your head and instantly hold the collar up to your nose, taking in his scent. Wiping your tear stained face with the sleeves, you take a deep breath before returning back to the kitchen where Daniel‘s waiting for you.

He is leaning against the kitchen counter, watching you slowly while the tea waits for you on the table. Two hot cups of tea, steaming up the kitchen.

Looking at his face, you find him smiling at you when he notices you’re wearing his hoodie. He wraps his free arm around you, pulling you close.

He kisses your head softly and whispers in your ear. "Drink it, it will warm you up."

Daniel's arms encircle you, squeezing you like he never wants to let you go.

You didn’t want to ruin the mood but you had to ask. You and Daniel were always good at communicating in the past and you didn’t want to stop now by pushing this argument away, you had to talk about it for the problem to be completely solved.

„We still need to talk. Not now, but.. we need to talk.“ You whisper, leaning closer into Daniels arms, hiding your face in the crook of his neck.

„You're right, we will talk." His voice is soft. „Not now though. For now, let's enjoy this tea. And... let's just be together." Daniel said as he kisses you again on the cheek and your still damp hair brushes against his face.

He was right. You need some rest. It's late, after all. And what happened shouldn't be discussed when you're both tired. Let alone now, when you're so peaceful.

„We‘ll be okay“ you whisper, a short promise. To him and yourself, that your love is stronger than an argument like that. You‘ll work it out. And it‘ll be okay. Like always.

[b0r3dtod3ath]

Hiay so read the one you did for sebastian vettel the one where they break up??

What if xoz did a part two??

Where maybe it is rumoured that reader has started dating mark or jenson? But not really casue he did to show that seb still loves her

Shenanigans happens and in the end seb and reader are back together?

Thank you ❤️❤️

a/n: Thank you for requesting! Part two takes place around five years later. Sebastian drives for Ferrari. 

Part 1

Couple of years have passed since your breakup. You thought you moved on but you couldn’t bring yourself to get in a relationship with anyone other than Sebastian. You had no idea how he was doing. Anything you knew came from a tabloid or scant information provided by your mutual friends. He seemed more mature and calm than before which made your heart ache as the lack in those aspects caused your splitting. 

Sebastian leaned back in his chair, the hum of the paddock a distant murmur as he scrolled through his phone. His eyes widened as he stumbled upon the latest headline: "Mark Webber's New Flame: Sebastian Vettel's Ex?" He clicked on the article, his heart pounding as he saw pictures of you and his now ex-coworker at a charity event, laughing and appearing close. The rumors spread like wildfire, and his mind raced with a mix of jealousy and sadness.

He tossed his phone onto the table, frustration bubbling up inside him. The thought of you with Mark stirred something deep within - a realization of how much he still cared about you. The memory of your breakup, the harsh words exchanged, and the lingering pain of your absence came rushing back. He had been trying to move on, he changed a lot during the last couple of years, but seeing you with someone else, especially Mark, made it impossible to ignore his true feelings.

A few days later, after a practice session, Sebastian found himself pacing in his hotel room. His mind was a cluster of thoughts, and he couldn't shake the image of you and Mark together. He knew he had to talk to you, to clear the air. He couldn’t believe it was true. You two hadn’t spoken for a long time but dating Mark was unlike you. 

He picked up his phone and hesitated for a moment before typing a message: "Can we meet? I need to talk to you”. He still had your number saved on his phone, hoping for a moment like this one where with a rush of adrenaline he would text you.

The reply came quicker than he expected: "What happened to “hi, how are you”? Sure. How about that cafe near the circuit tomorrow at 3?"

The next afternoon, Sebastian arrived at the cafe, his heart pounding with nerves. He spotted you sitting at a corner table, looking even more beautiful than the day you two broke up and certainly more beautiful than in the pictures alongside Mark. As he approached, you glanced up, your eyes meeting his with a mixture of surprise and anxiety.

"Hi, Seb," you greeted him softly, a hesitant smile on your lips.

"Hi," he replied, taking a seat across from you. For a moment, there was an awkward silence as you both gathered your thoughts.

"I saw the article," he finally said, breaking the tension. "About you and Mark".

You sighed, shaking your head and smirking. "It's not what you think. Mark and I are just friends. The media blew it out of proportion, as usual. You know I wouldn’t break up with you and just go date your enemy”.

Relief washed over him, but he still felt the need to explain. "When I saw those pictures, it hit me hard. Not because I don't trust you or I'm not a fan of his, but because it made me realize how much I still care about you. Even after all those years".

You looked at him, your eyes searching his face. He took a deep breath, gathering his courage. "I never stopped thinking about you. I know I messed up, and I've spent every day regretting it. The partying, the distractions - I let them come between us, and it was the worst mistake of my life."

"Seb..." you started, but he cut you off gently. "Please, let me finish. I've changed. I’ve had to face some hard truths about myself, and I realize now what I lost. Seeing those rumors made me confront the fact that I still love you. I never stopped loving you. I have changed a lot, you know it".

You were silent for a moment, processing his words. Then, you reached out and took his hand, your touch sending a jolt of warmth through him. "I never stopped loving you either, Seb. But things can't just go back to the way they were. We have both evolved".

He nodded, squeezing your hand. "I understand. I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I just want a chance to make things right”.

A small smile spread across your lips. "Then let's take it slow, one step at a time. We'll see where this goes".

Sebastian's heart swelled with hope. "I'd like that. More than anything. So, how have you been? What were you up to for those past years?”.

As you both sat there, hand in hand, the world outside the cafe seemed to fade away. For the first time in a long while, Sebastian felt a sense of peace and excitement thinking about your relationship. You spent hours catching up, getting to know each other and rebuilding broken bridges between you. 

Not even half a year later the two of you were spotted walking hand in hand and giggling. This time the headlines weren’t lying. 

June 9, 2024

[moonydustx]

Katakuri x reader! It can anything but my big boy needs love

wow, it took me a long time to answer you, I'm sorry. I hope it's still around and of course, I hope you like it too!

Breaking Deals

Katakuri x F!Reader

warnings: arranged marriage, Reader has some daddy issues. Katakuri and Reader are dealing with their own feelings. Reader drinks a lot of wine in this one. (Kata it's a sweetheart in this one)

"You love him, you just haven't realized it yet."

Brûléé's words combined with the taste of alcohol on your lips. After a party, the two of you took the remaining time of the night to drink and share your frustrations - yours related to being married to her brother for three years, but that was just a business arrangement.

The big problem is that Katakuri was the sweetest human being you could ever meet and it was hard not to fall in love with him. That's why you failed, you fell, and you fell hard for the magenta-haired man.

This led you to vent to your sister-in-law and amidst conversations over good wine, she made something clear to you that not even you had realized: you love Katakuri, as your husband and not just as a business transaction from your shit father. .

The steps back to your room seemed to be dragged and your deplorable state indicated that the alcohol levels had already been exceeded. The bedroom door felt even heavier, not as heavy as the atmosphere that had formed.

"You finally showed up, I was worried." you found Katakuri sitting on the huge bed the two of you shared, even though most nights he didn't stay there.

"Sorry - hiccup- I g-got distracted talking to Brûlée."

"Just talking?" he approached, seeing you enter with your heels dangling from your fingers and an empty bottle of wine in one hand.

"You know the answer big guy." With a small jump, you sat on the bed, under his attentive gaze. "I'm a mess, aren't I?"

"Just a little mess." He tried to appear soft, not wanting your drunk state to judge it as an offense.

"No need to lie, really." You let your shoes fall to the floor and placed the empty bottle next to you. "I'm a complete mess!" Your voice was almost tearful, which caught the attention of the man next to you.

"What happened?" he could easily find out, but he preferred to hear it come out of your mouth and not go beyond the limits imposed between the two of you.

"What happened?" your voice came out in a fake laugh, almost forced and indignant. "There was a party, beautiful. All couples gathered, including the two of us except we are not a couple."

"We are a couple."

"Only in the documents!" you support yourself on your knees, trying to be at his face level. "I know we have an agreement, which was just business between my father and your mother, but you are incredible Katakuri. These three years I have lived the best of my life by your side and it is impossible not to fall in love. I know that before that my options were either my father kill me or I kill myself, but you changed all that." You started to list his qualities, you interrupted yourself with a laugh. "Damn! I'm ruining our entire deal, my father is going to kill me." you let yourself fall into a sitting position again. "I'm sorry Kata."

"First of all, he's not going to kill you, I would never let him." his words spoken with a calmness and normality that still impressed you. "And second, we should have this conversation another time."

"I really won't have the courage for that another time." you pointed out and saw him let out a light laugh. "Unless we have more stock of that wine."

"We do, but that's why we need to talk later. You're drunk." he stated and saw you cross your arms and form a pout. "Besides this conversation, is there anything I can do for you?"

"You never would." You sulked even more.

"What would I never do?"

"Kiss me. The last and only time was at our wedding."

"Sweetheart, that doesn't feel right." he pointed out, but what the words said suggested going against his thoughts, as his hand automatically went to the cloth that hid him from the world around him.

"Please."

Katakuri let the cloth slide down his neck and it only took seconds for his lips to meet yours. Contrary to what his body asked - practically begged - Katakuri opted for a calmer path and kissed you slowly, delicately, hoping that those few seconds would take much longer.

As he walked away from you, you insisted on keeping your face close to his, your request coming out as a brief whisper from your lips.

"Sleep with me?"

"You know I…"

"Just hold me, please, like I'm yours, really yours."

Not having the strength to deny you something, your night ended lying on his lap, your little face nestled in Katakuri's chest while sleep took you somewhere far away.

Regret and guilt came together into one big headache as soon as you opened your eyes. What had you done the night before?

Focusing on the sensations around your body, you could feel that Katakuri was no longer there. The only thing you were sure of was that you had ruined the well-arranged marriage between the two of you. Your father would hate you even more than he already did, your mother-in-law would suck your soul and end you, Katakuri should be laughing at your expense along with one of his brothers. You had ruined everything.

Still gnawing at the guilt, you gathered strength and got out of bed heading towards the bathroom. The shower lasted much longer than you expected, as did your clothing store. Unconsciously you seemed to be trying to face reality. In the distance you heard Katakuri's voice calling you and, not feeling so firm on your own legs, you returned towards the room.

Sweets, breads, drinks, all of this came together on a breakfast tray placed on your bed, next to which Katakuri sat.

"There you are." his voice sounded too soft for someone angry. "I thought it might be a good idea to bring you something to eat."

And it was true, at least partially.

After everything that happened the night before, with you still immersed in his arms, Katakuri allowed himself to appreciate the moment and feel what the two of you could really be. That pleased him, it pleased him a lot and he would strive to make it a reality.

"Thank you for worrying." your voice was low, as you sat on the opposite side of the tray placed on the bed and therefore, on the opposite side to Katakuri. "Look delicious!"

"I tried making them with chocolate frosting, your favorite, but the decoration left something to be desired." he justified himself. For someone of his strength, Katakuri found the hesitation in his voice strange.

You reached the donut he had mentioned and took a piece, tasting the delicious dough. The agreement of not keeping a secret between the two of you included you knowing that he had great culinary skills and you would always love to try the food that Katakuri made.

"About last night…" you started, trying to rip off the band-aid, you just didn't expect him to say the same thing at the same time.

"Sorry, you can start." he tried to be a gentleman.

"About last night, I believe I went overboard and broke our agreement." your hands were sweating cold with every word that came out of your mouth. "I know I drank too much, I said and did things I shouldn't have…"

"Did you lie about something?"

"What do you mean?" You found his interruption strange. By now, breakfast was already forgotten between the two of you.

"About everything you said yesterday, did you lie about any of it?" Without the strength to get the words out, you just shook your head. "That's good, actually that's great. I like you too, the same way you like me because of what you told me. I like it when you just call me Kata or big guy, only you do that. Or when you keep insisting on picking up things that are always higher than you and in the end, you end up asking for my help…" realizing that he was talking too much, Katakuri stopped for a few seconds, seeing you look at him with bright eyes. "I really like you."

"Even though I snored on you last night?"

"Even you snoring." he insisted.

"And even though I always knock things over?"

"That I think is adorable." once again, he insisted, seeing you hide your smile with one hand, still surprised by everything. "It's hard to say all that."

"That's why I was drunk yesterday." the two of you laughed in unison, the tension that was previously hanging there dissipating with the echo of your laugh. "What do we do now?"

"You decide, you rule." he pointed out, seeing you stop smiling and look serious. "It's always been you, since the day I met you."

Not finding words to express your real desire, you just extended one of your hands towards him. Without any effort, Katakuri pulled you to lift your body and place you on his lap. Your fingers, previously intertwined with his as he pulled you, went to the scarf around his neck and one look from him was enough for you to have your permission.

His lips were sweet and soft, anyone who saw his fangs from the outside would never imagine that and you were happy to be the only one who could taste it. Just like the night before, he kissed you delicately, as if you were his little porcelain, the thing he would take the most care of in his entire life - and yes, he really saw you like that.

Just like the night before, you stopped kissing and just spent a few seconds looking at you.

"Can I ask you something?" he spoke, a hushed, calm tone that suited him.

"Whatever you want."

"I can hold you today as if you were always mine."

"Of course, I'll always be yours."

[effy-writes]

HIIIII!!! SO I HAVE A REQ FOR A FIZZ X READER (you can add asmodeus too if you want) WHERE IN EP 6 READER GETS KIDNAPPED WITH BLITZ AND FIZZ :3

HIII SORRY THIS WAS PUBLISHED LATE IVE BEEN SUPER BUSY THE PAST COUPLE OF DAYS. and i didn’t know if you wanted the reader already be dating fizz or platonic or smth so i made it where fizz and the reader are best friends and they ended up confessing their feelings bc they thought they were gonna die at the end

and thank you for requesting! hope you enjoyed <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fizz x GN! Reader: Confessed

Ozzie knows that you and Fizz has been best friends since childhood, so he called you to go with Fizz to run some errands because he doesn’t want Fizz to go alone. Of course you said yes because you wanted to protect him, so you and Fizz were currently at the Greed ring.

“Fizz, you sure you wanna do that clown tryout thing? You know how Mammon is.”

“Ugh not you too. Did Ozzie tell you to come talk to me about it?”

“Well, maybe. But still, you look so stressed whenever you’re working with Mammon.”

“Don’t worry about me-”

He got interrupted by running into Blitz, like literally running into him. Since childhood you obviously hung out with Fizz way more than Blitz, (so of course, Blitz doesn’t like you as much. Well more like he doesn’t hate you as much as he hates Fizz).

“Oh, wow. Lookee who it is.” Fizz crossed his arms.

“Oh, fuck... You again...Y/n? You’re still hanging out with him?”

“I didn’t abandon him like the way you did.”

“I didn’t- you know what fuck it never mind.”

“Stalkin' me now, huh?” Fizz replied to Blitz.

“Oh, don't fuckin' flatter yourself, clown. I have my own life, y'know, without YOU in it.”

“Uh huh, sure! Blitzo.”

“The "O" is silent now, bitch! And gee whiz, we've been in each other's relative vicinity TWICE, in the last FIFTEEN YEARS! That would make me, THE SHITTIEST STALKER IN HISTORY!”

“Twice... IS ALREADY WAY TOO MUCH.”

You watched as the two bicker at each other. You were about to say something to cut this interaction off but all of a sudden the three of you were touching bodies. And in a blink of an eye immediately got slammed against the wall. The wall slamming knocked the wind out of you.

“Funny to run into ya again, "Blitzy!"” Striker laughed as he pulls out his knife and slides toward Fizzarolli, pointing it under the chin. “And with a famous friend...” Striker looked at you and tilted his head, “Who the fuck are you?”

“Who the fuck are you?”

“I asked you first!”

“I asked you second!”

“Oh, fuck me.” Blitz groaned.

“For the record, we are not friends.” Fizz announced.

One thing led to another. Crimson tied up the 3 of you, and put duct tape on Fizz’s mouth. You tried to break out of the ropes to protect Fizz but it was no use. Since you kept making a lot of noise Striker put duct tape over your mouth while Crimson was leaving a prerecorded message.

You realized that Crimson was going to send the video to Ozzie. Does Ozzie know that I’m here with him? Fuck..he’s going to be so pissed that I let this happened.

After the message, Striker ripped off the duct tape of your mouths and threw the three of you into a cage. Fizz stammers in fear while Blitz scoots back. You got closer to Fizz, trying to calm him down since he’s a little claustrophobic.

“Oh, chill out, jester. Christ on a stick, it's like you've never been tied up before!”

“Sure, but not by a bunch of psychos! And a piece of shit!”

“Am I...? Okay, am I the psycho or the piece of shit?”

“Both!”

“Yeah, that checks.”

“Instead of yelling at each other we need to find a way to break out!” You whispered.

“Y/n why are you with him anyway?” Blitz jabbed.

“We’re best friends.” You shrugged.

“And Fizz still didnt ask you out?

Fizz gulped, completely discarding this topic, “Ohh, playin' that card, huh? Ok... What about you? Seems your tastes have gotten more... "regal", lately. Heheh...”

“Yeah, well unlike you, I fuck who I want, when I want. I'm not gonna be tied down to some big blue-blood asshole.”

“You could've fooled me the way Princey was cozying up to you at Ozzie's.”

“Wait, you were at Ozzie’s? And on a date with the prince?” You interjected.

“Hey! Stolas only cares about having a rugged peasant raw-dog him into his mattress, it's nothing... y'know...It's nothing else...”

“Then why were you even there?” Fizz questioned.

“OTHER very important reasons, of course!”

You tried to wiggle yourself out of the ropes while in the midst of Blitz and Fizz arguing yet again. Hearing the way Fizz spoke about Ozzie made you have a pain in your gut.

Striker interrupted the discourse that was happening, and then proceeded to say all of the things wrong with the taboo relationships that Fizz and Blitz had with royal blue bloods. Obviously Fizz got defensive, which made Striker threaten him.

“Leave him alone!” You yelled out.

Striker glared at you and let go of Fizz, “Looks like you want him, don’t you?”

“Excuse me?”

“I see the way your face changed from pissed off to sadness once jester over here started talking about his boy toy.” Striker grinned sinisterly.

You glanced over at Fizz who had wide eyes, “No, I’m just sad because I have to be locked up in a cage with people who won’t stop fighting.” You said as a matter of fact.

Striker shook the cage before jumping down from it. You looked back at Fizz and softly smiled, not knowing on what to say without expressing your feelings for him.

You stayed silent as Blitz was finally able to get you and Fizz out of the cage, but once you guys all fell out and was met face to face with mafia members things got serious.

You and Fizz made a run for it while Blitz was fighting them off. “We have to help him.”

“What? No!”

“Fizz please. If we don’t we might die.”

Fizz didn’t want to help the person that stabbed him in the back, but he did wanted you to live. “Fine.”

And with that you and Fizz tried to kill off as many members as possible. Fizz doesn’t know how to fight, but you do know some fighting moves.

“What the fuck, Fizz?! How is someone this flexible, this useless in combat?! At least Y/n knows how to fight.”

“I’m a performer! I don’t do danger!”

With a few of the demons out for the count, Blitz, Fizz and you made a run for it.

“Well good to know you're still a wimpy circus puss that needs Y/n to protect you, sounds like you’re using them!”

“Where did you get that from!” Fizz yelled.

“Because ever since we were little they had to protect you! Especially after that accident!”

“AN ACCIDENT?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!”

“Guys we seriously need to stop arguing we HAVE to focus getting out of here!” You yelled.

“You didnt even sound grateful that Y/n was with you! And you were the one who wanted them and not me!” Blitz shot the mafia number that was coming from behind.

“I DIDNT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT ME NOT WANTING YOU TO SEE ME! I WANTED YOU TO.” Fizz huffed, “I wanted my best friends to see me.”

All three of you guys had a look of realization. “Ohhhh.”

“Look, Misunderstanding or no, it's hard to just forgive you. It's been fifteen years and... That's so much time... But! I guess you didn't really ruin my life.”

“What, you're telling me getting blown up didn't ruin your life?”

“It was painful... and challenging, and y'know FUCK YOU STILL, BUT... It's not like I'm broken. And I now have someone who understands me and...” Fizz looks at you and softly smiled.

Blitz looked at you too, “Where were you in the fire?”

“I was with Fizz. He uh…pushed me out the way and he got blown up instead of me.“

Striker snuck up on you guys and got a hold of you three, “You been a pain in my ass long enough, Blitz. NOW, I'm gon' break you like a FUCKIN' HORSE!”

“Ohh don’t you dare talk sexy to me!”

“You're still on the horse thing?!” The two of you said.

Striker and the goons cornered you guys even more. “Fizz! Remember how you used to distract my dad so I could steal his booze?”

“I mean, yeah? Why?”

“Yeah well, I need to get up to that window there to bust us out.”

“Ohohooo! One distraction, comin' up!”

The moment Fizz started to perform you helped Blitz break out.

“Since when did you become a personal body guard for Fizz?”

“Since he saved me from that fire. I feel like I owe it to him.” You replied as you and Blitz created a tower of boxes to get to the window.

“I didn’t mean to blow him up, Y/n. I’m sorry that I did and it WAS an accident!”

“I know, I believe you. Don’t worry about it, okay? He’s doing good.”

Blitz used a blow torch to open the window. “I’m sorry I didn’t even try to contact you either. I was just..I don’t know.”

“Dude it’s okay. Stop apologizing- You just fucking dropped the blow torched.” You deadpanned.

“Fuck! Okay uh..give me those extremely convenient bombs.”

You turned around and saw them. “Oh, would you look at that.”

You guys set them around the window and took some steps back before pushing the trigger, making the window explode into a massive hole.

Fizz stretches up and allowed Blitz on his back while using his other mechanic arm to hold you and swung you guys out of the warehouse.

The whole building caved in as you three made a run for it while laughing. Your hand was still in Fizz’s, and since he can’t feel you assume he doesn’t know you guys are holding hands.

In the midst of you guys talking Striker grabbed the two of you. You stomped on his foot, but instead of him letting go you and Fizz, he only let go of you, making you drop and before you could get up and stepped on your neck, cutting off air flow.

“Y/n!” Fizz shouted.

“I'm THROUGH losin' these fights! This worthless little pet REEKS of his over-bloated master... I'll at least enjoy gettin' rid of 'im.”

Blitz sweats a little, then finally shooting the gas tanks, making them explode. Striker scurries away and the moment he did Fizz helped you up while you gasp for air.

“Are you okay!?”

You looked at your surrounding areas, flames all around you two. “Fizz! We’re going to catch on fire!” You screamed out.

Fizz tried using his mechanical hand to reach out to get you two away but it malfunction. “Fuck!”

“Fizz, I always had feelings for you since we were little and I really wished I said something before we die.”

Fizz saw Blitz hop onto a crane and hold his hand out to grab you guys. “We’re not going to die I promise, here hold on to me.”

You held onto Fizz as blitz swung you guys out of the fire and onto a safe area.

“YOU BLEW US UP AGAIN YOU PRICK!” Fizz yelled.

“I know. But this time I stuck around.” Blitz saw that you guys were still holding hands, “And I overheard Y/n express their feelings for you because they thought you guys were gonna die. So uh, congratulations! If I didn’t try to blow you guys up then Y/n wouldn’t have confessed SO, yall welcome.”

“Fuck you.” You and Fizz said in unison.

~~

Before you and Fizz met face to face with Ozzie, he wanted to talk to you. “I-”

You interrupted, “It’s okay if you don’t have feelings for me. I understand and it was very impulsive for me to say that. I know you and Ozzie-”

“We’re polyamorous. I want you in our relationship.”

“But what about Ozzie?”

“He won’t mind, in fact he’s always been telling me to invite you joining us because he knows I’ve had feelings for you since we were little.”

You smile out of relief and wrapped your arms around him to pull him into a kiss. “What are we going to say to Ozzie?”

“We’ll walk up in there and just tell him we’re in a relationship.”

“Are you sure he won’t mind?”

“Y/n,” Fizz placed his forehead onto yours so he could feel you, “Today he told me to ask you out. Everytime we hang out one on one he’s always telling me this. I’m just glad you were the one to say it first because I do NOT have the guts.”

“In my defense I thought we were gonna die, so if it wasn’t for Blitz we wouldn’t be having this conversation.” You kissed Fizz, “I love you Fizz, I really do.”

“I love you too.”

[city-tickles]

Two Tickle Sessions In One Day!

Hi!

It's been a while but I hope you are doing well. I am still on break from posting clips or requests but I wanted to let you know about my recent sessions.

A month ago I was in one of those bad tickle moods. One of those moods where it was all you could think about and the rush of getting tickled or tickling someone was intense. I don't get these moods often and usually when I do, I don't like it because the last couple of times that has happened, I've received bad news about someone I care about, so it also makes me a little anxious when I get that way. Thankfully, it did not happen this time.

I needed to get the mood out but there was no one in the area to session with. Since no one was available, I decided to check out two parties that I have not been to in years. One M/M party and one Female Foot Party.

When it comes to M/M, I am 100% lee and it is something that does not give me much if any arousal. It's just tickling, and I can appreciate it. I'm sure I'd appreciate it more if it could "get me there" but I've seen enough clips and done sessions, and it usually doesn't. I also rarely do M/M because I have to be in a mood for it. This time, I was in a big mood for it, so I decided to go.

I've spoken about the M/M party in the past. Last time I went about 8 years ago, I just wasn't comfortable or ready to be there and it seemed like the owner took umbrage with that when I tried to leave. I figured a lot of time has passed and I have gained more experience, so hopefully things would be fine. I explain why I wanted to go to the party, and I was allowed to go.

I entered the party, and as a cis-identifying male, it's a little overwhelming at first. Action (Everyone is clothed) is everywhere right in front of you, but everyone is also very nice and doing their thing. I like to give people space, but there was no space to go, so I was just watching everything go down lol.

While waiting, I was introduced to a guy, who had grey hair and , who was also into tickling and we began talking. At first, the convo was small talk, but then we realized we knew each other from a previous meeting, which made things easier. After some talking, he asked what I was here for and when it comes to males, I am strictly a lee, so I told him I wanted to be tickled. Luckily, a massage table opened up and was cleaned off and ready to be used. We asked the table owner, who was a tall, slender man with grey hair and facial hair, if we could use it. Lucky or not lucky for me, we were allowed but the table owner was also into tickling. They asked me if he could join in and I figured why not?

I laid on the table and decided not to be bound because sometimes I stay still anyway. And before I know it, I have two lers all over me, testing out my spots and trying to find where I am most ticklish. They would glide their fingers all over my sides, under my arms, my tummy, my thighs and of course, my feet while I laughed and didn't move around too much. It was extra sensitive because 1. With the massage chair, I'm mostly looking upwards and can only see the ceiling. And 2. I'm getting teasing from all angles! The two very skilled lers keep saying things like, "Oh, he's real ticklish!" "I think he likes it!" While others at the party are watching and saying things like, "I think he doesn't want it to stop" and "He's having a lot of fun now"

With two lers on me, I never had time to have one spot make me off the wall ticklish because it was always changing. Sometimes it was their fingers lightly tickling my stomach that was the most intense. Other times, it was harder touches on my feet by one of the lers. Sometimes it was an attack under my arms. There were a lot of different moments during the 20-30 minutes of tickling that just kept making me laugh hysterically. I do know at one point, a hairbrush was used because I felt it and that always felt more surprising than ticklish. The other interesting part about having two lers on your feet were both styles were different. One was lighter and the other was harder, but both were effective!

(I couldn't find a MM/M gif)

After my time was done, I thanked them for the session and decided to wrap up since the party was coming to an end anyway. It was time to go to the next party.

This party, which I also had low hopes for, runs all the time in NYC and it is pay-to-play. I was that down bad, that I was willing to do it this evening lol. I went in with very low expectations and the reminder that if the first few moments are bad, I can just leave.

When I got there, it took forever for them to let me in, which already set my expectations to low. Despite this, I walked in and heard laughter already. Someone was getting tickled under the sheets, so I knew I wasn't the only tickler in the area. The girls that I saw in there were nice and chill to talk to for the most part. Some were more personable, while others just wanted to make their money, which I am not upset about. They're not there to be my friend.

The first lee was a tiny girl with red hair, and was ticklish but not that reactionary. I don't think she was ticklish on her feet at all, but I would always ask if it's okay to tickle elsewhere. Thankfully it was, and her upperbody, especially her arms, were her weakspot. She did not seem into it in the slightest, so I tried not to overdo it.

The second lee was this tall, black girl, with long hair and very nice to talk to. She wasn't sure how ticklish she could be, so I would tested some of her spots. Her feet were tolerable, her knees were very sensitive, and under her arms, she was almost unable to do!

I brought some tools that I didn't bring out at the M/M party (my bag at that party was all the way on the other side I just didn't want to bother with it) I ran an ostrich feather up and down her soles and her legs, which felt more relaxing to her. Then, I brought out TicklingDuck's device vibrating device.

As the device touched her soles, she would laugh hard, squirm around, cover her mouth, and was genuinely shocked at something being so ticklish on her. I asked if I could use the device on her knees and she went "Oh no!" and let me do it anyway, which I didn't do for long because she couldn't handle it.

The third lee was another redhead, who was also a nice person to talk to and wearing boots and long socks. I tickled her through the socks first, which made her giggle a bit, before taking them off and scribbling on her toes and soles so more. Her feet were also moderately ticklish, so I asked if I could tickle other parts of her body. Her weakspot was the ribcage and made any other spot look like a 1 compared to them! I spent most of my time on her feet since the ribcage was so intense, but we did play a few games. I would tell her if she could let me tickle there for 10 seconds, she would get a reward, which would be a foot massage or other foot worship. She agreed and barely opened up her arms until I scribbled in there and teased her further, saying "You gotta let me get in there or I'm gonna increase the time" She opened up her ribs and it was the longest 10 seconds of her life. Afterwards, I would congratulate her for making it through and doing such a good job.

After we were finished, I was ready to go since I had an obligation to get to later in the evening, but another taller woman approached me and asked me if I like tickling. She mentioned that she liked tickling to and wanted to know if I wanted to session. I was skeptical at first, because it felt like a money-grab, but I figured I'm already here so why not?

Best decision I made at that party. I started by spider tickling all the way up from her feet to legs, to her sides, across her tummy, back to her ribs, and of course under her arms. This woman was genuinely ticklish everywhere and was a lot of fun to play with. I would caress her thighs and tease like I'm about to tickle there, only to sneak attack and tickle her tummy. I brought out the TicklingDuck device again and we played another counting game to see how long she could last without moving, and I made sure to count the longest 30 seconds I could, running my fingers all across her tummy and under hear arms while she laughed her head off underneath the covers. The last thing I did to her, was bring out the pair of stocks that just arrived. I was itching to try them on someone and she was so excited to see stocks. We locked her bare feet and the stocks and I ran my fingers all across her soles and under her toes, while she was unable to get away or pull them out. While these sessions lasted 10 minutes, this one was definitely longer and we both knew it. After she was done, she complimented my ler skills, saying most male lers are rough, but I was very gentle with her, but also devastating, which I took as a big compliment.

Before I left, I had one request for her. I had a hard time locking the stocks on myself at my home, but when I did, they were not very comfortable. I asked if she could test the stocks out on me to see how good they were. She obliged and got my feet in the stocks. Once I was locked in, she began running her nails across my soles, which was one of the more intense tickles I got all night! I laughed hard and and was unable to do anything else, my feet were trapped and that definitely made the tickling worse! She would tease me and say things like "Aww! Is someone ticklish?" And "Now who's ticklish" until I had to stop her because I really had to get going. I thanked her for the fun time and planned to come back in the future.

Overall, it was a great day of tickles and satisfied my ler and lee moods!

[animeficsworld]

Your Monster and You

Garou x Reader

Warning: Smut

Summary: Every night he crawled into your bed, and every morning he left.

Your relationship with Garou had been nothing but complicated.

From the moment you invited him over after a night at a bar, you knew exactly what he was doing.

He was looking for a place to crash and you became the perfect fool he can take advantage of.

But you didn’t care much.

Months ago, when he first came over he fucked you so good, you could barely walk the next day.

Then you met him a couple weeks later, and the same happened. You invited him over, you two had sex in the shower, you fell asleep next to him, but he was gone the next morning. 

However, that time, he left his phone number.

After this, he texted you almost every day, asking if he can come over. 

You always said yes.

You had nothing to lose, you lived alone and he was an amazing fuck.

He always gave you the best time either with his fingers, tongue or cock.

It was a simple exchange. 

But of course, you had to ruin it.

You fell in love. 

Truly a mistake on your part.

Who falls in love with a monster?

But you kept your feelings hidden.

Or at least, tried to.

But one day, he came to your home unannounced, bruised and bloody.

"What the fuck?" you asked as he fainted.

You knew he was bad. But this was another level. 

You dragged him to your couch and cleaned his wounds. You decide to cook some food for when he wakes up.

He woke up when you were already in bed.

It was late, but he decided to eat, you heard the clanking of the plates as he ate the food you made, and then, he joined you in bed.

Like he always did, pulling you close to his chest as he slowly fell asleep.

---

The next morning you were more than shocked to find him still in your bed.

That never happened before for the last year he has been coming over.

But you weren't complaining, you stayed in his arms. Not moving. You were scared that if you moved, he would just bolt out the door and never come back.

You ended up falling back to sleep. 

You woke up a couple of hours later to a certain feeling between your legs.

It took you a couple moments to realise what was going on  Garou was in between your legs eating you out. 

“Garou.” you said with a moan. “What are you-“ but he just decided to add a finger making your job to stop him a lot more difficult.

You tried to object, but his tongue found your clin just perfectly as he continued.

Your legs started to shake as you came.

No warning or anything.

Just a loud moan.

"Garou." you called his name in your moment of bliss.

Just as you came back to your senses you realized that he was standing up and ready to leave.

"Where are you going?" you asked as he got ready to open your door.

"I'll be back later." he said without looking at you and the door closed behind him.

You spent the entire day at home.

And you made up your mind. You will break this... whatever this is between you and Garou and you.

You were over the anger, the worry and the heartbreak. You never knew if he would come back or not, you never knew if he would die out there or not. 

You couldn't live like that anymore.

As much as it hurt, you wanted it all to end.

Garou arrived back later that afternoon. You were sitting on your couch watching a movie when he arrived.

You knew you needed to talk, but you were still scared to do it.

You loved him.

You loved his attitude, you loved his eyes and his wicked smile. You loved his obsession with monsters.

"We can't keep doing this." you ended up saying as you looked up at him. "This is ruining me, I feel so deeply for you, even though you told me not to get attached... I did. And this is killing me. Seeing you leave when I would need you the most. I simply can't continue like this, not for the sex, not for anything. It is not worth it, I'm sorry. I want a relationship, a man who I can lean on, who doesn't leave to fight heroes on a daily without telling me."

"What if I tell you? Would you be with a man like that, who hunts and kills heroes?"

"I would be with you. I would love to love you freely, without any hesitation. But you are not that, Garou and we both know."

"You deserve better. But at the same time, I would kill anyone who dares to touch you. So, what should we do?"

"What do you mean? Why are you saying that?" you asked, confused.

"I want to be the best for you, but the best of me, not an idea of a man. I want to be a monster, the strongest monster, but... I want to be yours and for you to be mine.”

You didn’t want to believe his words. He must be lying. But his eyes were on yours and you could see the truth in them. 

He was telling the truth. 

And suddenly, you became aware of everything around you.

It was a warm summer evening, as the sun dipped below the horizon and painted the sky in hues of pink and gold, surrounded by the heady scent of blooming roses, you didn't even notice that he had roses in his hand.

As he stood there, gazing into your eyes, a spark ignited between you, a flame of desire that burned brightly in the gathering darkness as the sun began to set. 

Garou took a few steps as you stood up, allowing him to reach out to caress your cheek, his touch sending shivers down your spine. 

You leaned into his embrace, your lips seeking his in a passionate kiss that spoke of longing and love and a promise.

A promise of forever.

Your bodies pressed together, hearts beating as one, you lost yourself in the moment, in his arms, yet again. 

The world around you fading into insignificance. 

In that small apartment, you were the only two souls in reality, your love a force of nature that could not be restricted.

As the moon rose high in the sky, casting a silvery glow over your entwined bodies, you and Garou knew that you were bound together by a love that was as timeless as the stars above. 

Even if this all started because of convenience. He needed a place to sleep, and you needed a man to fuck away your problems.

In that passionate moment, you found comfort and joy.

Your hearts overflowing with the beauty of their shared bond, something that was so unspoken before, not it was reality.

And as you lay there, lost in his arms, you knew that your love would endure, a beacon of light in a world filled with darkness.

Just your monster and you. 

[yoongihan]

We're Friends - Jeongin/I.N

for the blossoming love event by @skzwritingcafe

pairing: jeongin x femreader

genre: angst, fluff, light smut, friends to lovers

rating: M

word count: ~11k (don't ask)

warnings: light smut (heavy making out, mention of erection, wanting to have sex, etc.), language (f word mostly), underage drinking, reader is a year and a month older than jeongin (so 'noona' is used, she calls him 'agi'), he is taller than reader, actual romantic things happen between them when he's 17 and she's 18, as well as when she's just turned 20 and he's days away from 19 (if you have any issue with that, please ignore my story and move on), school is a weird mix of American and Korean education, mentions of Seungmin & Changbin, Jisung and Hyunjin make one major appearance, this is hella self-indulgent so you've been warned.

a/n: to my jeongin anon, this is so long in coming...I'm sorry. It took ages and it's ridiculously long. i hope you like it! to @jl-micasea-fics who told me it wasn't terrible, thank you. to any reader out there, it's a bunch of vignettes chronicling when they met to when feelings are finally realized, so about five years. this occurs in the same universe as I Adore You (though timeline-wise, this is earlier than Jisung's story) and A Big Neon Sign. you do not have to have read either of those though.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In truth, the only thing you and Jeongin had in common was an older, athletic brother.

His brother was on the high school baseball team and so was yours. 

While your brother, Changbin was a senior, mentoring all the younger teammates, Jeongin’s brother Seungmin was your age, a sophomore; making Jeongin a freshman when you met him.

It sucks to be the younger sibling, stuck in the same high school as your older, much more appreciated sibling. 

You had your driver’s permit, but your brother was loathed to let you ever use the car, even when you promised that you’d just run home and come to pick him back up when practice was over. It was a clear and vehement ‘no.’ 

Illegal too, but still. 

You had Seungmin in a few classes. Not only was he good at hitting a ball with a stick, but he also kicked ass at Chemistry. Which was only good for you as he had gotten stuck as your lab partner for the year. You two worked well enough together (he did the hard stuff and you just listened to his instructions because none of Chemistry made sense to you; it was your parents’ stubborn insistence that had you in Honors), but you wouldn’t say you and Seungmin were close, or even friends. 

Just amiable classmates. 

Baseball pre-season started once basketball was in playoffs, and you were relegated to attempting to study while planted on a set of bleachers in the still-chilly weather. 

Unlike last year though, this time you have company.

In the late winter sun, his dark hair has an auburn tinge as he rests his chin on his hand, making his lips purse in pout. When your footsteps are audible above the last cars leaving the school parking lot, his head turns toward you so fast, you worry about his neck. 

You give a twist of your hand to say hi.

He sits up, eyes big behind his black-rimmed glasses and you can see him swallow as he waves back.

“Hi.” 

He has braces. 

You point toward the baseball field. “You have a brother out there, too?”

He relaxes slightly in the shoulders but tenses up again when you plop down on the same bleacher. 

“Yeah. Seungmin.”

“Oh.” You vaguely remember Seungmin saying he had a brother. “I have a couple classes with him.”

The younger boy blinks at you. “Yeah?”

You introduce yourself and gesture toward the field again, naming your brother. 

“Jeongin. I mean, I’m Jeongin.”

He seems jumpy, his hands gripping his knees. It’s surprising because you don’t think you look the least bit intimidating

You stare at the outfield, the hazy silhouettes in white and red before turning to Jeongin.

“I keep telling myself I can’t wait until I can drive myself, but then I remember I have to share a car with my brother which really isn’t  the freedom I was hoping for.”

He blinks a few times as though he needs a moment or two to process your words then he smiles. 

Okay, for a little freshman with braces, he’s cute. 

“I just got my permit, but Min-hyung barely lets me practice.”

You roll your eyes in solidarity. “Older brothers are the worst.”

He nods then shakes his head. “I mean, he’s not all bad.”

You laugh. “You can’t go back now, Jeongin. Older brothers, even when they are nice, are the worst. Especially athletes.”

The smile appears again. “A little.” 

“So, you don’t play?” You gesture back to the field.

He shakes his head adamantly. “Not my thing.”

“What is your thing?”

He shrugs again.

“Still figuring it out?”

He meets your eyes and you don’t know why you’ve spoken this much to a freshman boy, but you have and you think he seems nice. But when your eyes meet, you realize that it’s more than that.

You want to be friends. It’s a weird, deep-in-your-gut feeling that honestly terrifies you a little bit. 

“Yeah,” he says softly, “still figuring it out.”

—

It continues like that. Four days a week after school. You and Jeongin stuck together while waiting for your more impressive siblings to finish their impressive voluntary physical exertion. Sometimes you wave to him at the games, when he’s stuck between his parents, looking miserable. You stopped doing that when he told you his parents wanted to know if you were his girlfriend.

“I didn’t know how to explain that we were just friends.” He’s pouting at his science textbook.

“Just saying ‘we’re friends’ seems to be plenty explanatory.”

He snorts. “You’d think.”

You smile at him before looking over at his textbook. “Need help?”

By the time you can drive without supervision and baseball season is over you (his parents and your parents’ approval given eventually) give him rides home as Seungmin transitions into travel ball and private lessons. Jeongin doesn’t seem to mind having you as a chauffeur. You still have to get the car back to Changbin as he now does Track & Field (discus throwing, of course), so sometimes you just study with Jeongin; at his house, or the closest coffeehouse or diner. 

Your classmates (kinda friends if you think that just hanging out at lunch and sharing notes in class makes a friendship) ask you the same thing his parents do.

You iterate that you and Jeongin are friends. 

No one believes you, but you can’t be bothered with the suppositions. It’s nice to have a guy friend who is unrelated to any other part of your school life. 

Changbin’s graduation is around the corner, and you wonder if perhaps that’s the end of your brief, but nice thing with Jeongin. 

So, you ask him.

“I won’t be forced to stay after school next year,” you begin.

Jeongin looks up from his history textbook, his eyes glazed over behind his glasses. 

“No older brother.”

“Exactly,” you point at him with your milkshake straw. A little drips onto the plastic table, but you ignore it. “However, you are not so lucky. And won’t have your license till February, right?”

He nods then blinks a few times as he puts it all together. “Wait…would you…I mean, do you still want to hang out?”

You don’t know how to feel about his expression. It’s more shock than anything else. Is he unaware that he’s your friend? Is this something you have to explain clearly and overtly to boys? 

Changbin did tell you once that guys were idiots (it had been a ‘don’t ever date’ kind of convo, but you suppose it still applies). 

“Yes.” You refrain from saying ‘obviously’ at the end of it.

He smiles (and you will never tell a soul how much you like his smile, braces and all). “Okay.”

“However, once you can drive too…you have to drive me around sometimes, agi”

He nods emphatically after making a face at the nickname (you’ll always call him that). “Of course, yes, absolutely.” He takes a fry from the plate of them you have in between you on the table. “Good.”

“Good?” 

You see his face turn pink, and he quickly busies himself with history again. You let it go, but that moment still lodges itself in your brain; ready to be pondered over much much later down the road. 

–

High school is a drudgery, and you get through it with little to no permanent damage. You date once during your junior year, and your time with Jeongin decreases. It’s logistics, but you find you miss him. 

When you break up with him, you even mention that.

“Huh?” Jeongin is this time indulging in a milkshake.

“I didn’t have as much time to hang out with you. Since we don’t have classes together, it’s like maybe I saw you once or twice a month. For six months of dating him.” You make a face. “Didn’t like it.”

When he doesn’t say anything, you look up from your notebook to see that ever-familiar blush warming his cheeks. 

“What?” you say.

“Missed you too, noona.”

You graduate somewhere in the middle of your class and start the ever-exciting process of prepping for dorm life in the city two hours away, Jeongin comes along to help you pick out bedding and various other items.

“No.”

You raise your eyebrows at him. “No?”

He shakes his head. “You cannot continue to only wear guys’ jeans in college.”

“And why not?”

“Just…trust me?” He drags you toward the women’s section, and starts picking out jeans, and tops; piling them into your arms. “They actually have ‘boyfriend fit’ for girls, you know.”

“That seems stupid.”

He looks at you. “Don’t you want to up your fashion game a bit?”

“Jeongin, just cause you care about it, doesn’t mean I do.”

He says your name in a very disappointed way, his bright expression turning toward pouting. 

He knows you’re a pushover.

“Fine, fine. You get free rein for now. But know I’ll just end up in pajamas for most of college anyway. That’s the brilliance of college.”

He lights up immediately. “So we can get you some cute pjs too.”

You have created a monster.

–

When you say goodbye to him the day before you leave to move into the dorms, you realize something. As you hug him (which surprises you both because he’s not real physically affectionate, and you tend to respect that), you feel his hands at your back and the brief contact of his cheek on top of your head (when did he get taller than you?). He’s grown up a lot.

Which makes you feel a little weird.

You two break apart awkwardly and you have to force yourself to look at him. He’s glancing at the ground.

“I won’t be far.”

“I know, noona.” 

You swallow, feeling dumb for feeling as much as you do. 

“Don’t get too cool as a senior to talk to me.”

He meets your eyes then, making a face. “I don’t expect to be cool, ever.”

Maybe it’s the fact that you’re a little older, or maybe because you like to observe your peers almost like a zoologist in the wilds of high school, but you think that Jeongin very easily could be cool by current standards. 

He’s pretty enough. And interesting enough though that might be why he can’t be. High schoolers don’t seem to appreciate actually interesting humans. 

What if he gets popular and doesn’t need you anymore?

“Noona…” he begins, his hands deep in his jeans pockets. “Thanks.”

You feel your forehead furrow in confusion. “For?”

There’s the blush that he wears all too often. “Just…high school was better cause we were friends.”

Oh jeez. You better get back home or you might hug him again. 

“Yeah. Same.” You nod and take a step back. “I’ll text you when I’m unpacked okay? You want to visit the school anyway, right?”

“Yeah.” He also walks backward. “I’ll see you?”

Why do you kind of want to cry, too?

“Absolutely.”

When you get into your car, you linger before driving away, watching him walk back to his house. 

– 

Freshman year in college is a lot. Not with studies because you’ve always been pretty decent at that, but everything else. There’s so much more time available and that overwhelms you a bit. Classes take only a percentage of your day and then there’s new people, living-on-your-own assimilation, and well…parties.

You never went to parties in high school. You weren’t invited (no big deal) because your brother was Changbin and he was invited, but not the little sister. Again, it wasn’t a big deal as you didn’t know that you wanted to go.

But now, you could. Changbin’s at a different university entirely and no one (well, maybe one or two former classmates) knows who you are and there’s a lot of freedom in that.

So when you get invited to one, you decide to go.

But you ask Jeongin to come with. 

You both lie to his parents (you’re pretty sure you’re going to hell for lying to the Yangs because they’ve never been anything but nice to you) that he’s doing a college visit overnight. And yes, he’s visiting, but there’s no class you’ll be going to, even if the party is a Thursday night and technically you could have class on Friday (you usually do, but your Everyday Biology professor canceled class for something he won’t reveal (you suspect a convention for other science nerds), neither you nor Jeongin will be attending.

Your roommate spends 90% of her sleeping hours at her boyfriend’s place, so you know that Jeongin can crash with you. 

Though he seems a little nervous about it. 

“I washed and changed her sheets, okay?” you say. “I even asked her if it’s fine.”

Jeongin is staring at the bed (there are a lot of pillows for one person to be sure). “And she said it was okay?”

“She hasn’t technically answered, but it’s been two days. If she had a major issue, I would have received a text.” You walk over to him, take his overnight bag, and toss it on the bed. “See, you’re good.” 

Between his arrival and party time, you guys camp out in your room, catching up on everything and nothing. His senior year and he’s taking four advanced placement classes (he’s just as smart as his brother, though far more subtle about it), a girl he’s thinking about dating, but feels a bit unsure.

“Why?” You give up on the behemoth of Paradise Lost for your literature class in favor of this discussion. You know he’s gone on dates, but he doesn’t talk about it. Occasionally he asks ‘hypothetical’ questions about girls, but Jeongin’s always been pretty private about romance. 

“She’s not…” Jeongin presses his lips together, thinking. “We don’t have much in common. Like she’s a cheerleader.”

You know not all cheerleaders are the stereotype, but it’s hard not to make a face at that reveal of information. 

“It’s not like it’s a lifetime commitment, agi.”

He lets out a sigh. “I know. And it’s our last year, so it can’t go anywhere, so should I even start it?”

You shrug. “I’m not gonna tell you yes or no, but I think seeing the potential end before even beginning is on a level of cynicism not even I have.”

He laughs. “Fair.” He’s quiet again and you look back at the stupid epic poem you have to read and understand. “I’m nervous about kissing her.”

It’s mumbled, his words, but for whatever reason, you hear it clearly.

“Wait, what? Why?” You scoot to the edge of your bed. “You’ve kissed before…?” Again, not an oft-discussed topic for you both, but still, you’re pretty sure he has. 

This is definitely new territory for your friendship.

You also realize that you’ve missed seeing his blush.

“Yeah, but not like…kissing.” He emphasizes the last word, face pink. 

“No tongue?”

“Jeez, noona.”

“You brought it up,” you say quickly so you don’t blush in embarrassment.

He covers his face with his hands. “I know. And no. I haven’t. And it’s dumb and everyone has and I should be an expert at my age and–”

“Hey…there’s not ‘should be,’ okay?” you interrupt and move to sit next to him on your roommate’s bed. You pat his knee. “Your path is your path. Whatever speed you move is fine.” 

He turns to look at you and even a month apart has changed him. His face seems so much sharper; cheekbones, nose, and jawline. Even his eyes seem more mature. 

Your cute friend has become handsome. 

“If she likes you, she’s not gonna care about whether you kiss perfectly or not.” You pause, wondering if you should share, but you decide might as well. “Less tongue is always better, especially when kissing someone new.”

“Yeah?”

You nod, knowing you didn’t avoid your face heating from the convo, but he’s your friend. He should benefit from your experiences. 

“Hey, find someone to kiss tonight at the party,” you suggest even as your stomach twists oddly. “Risk-free, you know? Unlikely you’ll ever see them again and you can get the first-time nerves out of the way.”

He stares at you for a few seconds, almost long enough for you to call him on it, but then drops his gaze to his lap. “Yeah, maybe.” 

You lose Jeongin about a half hour after showing up to the party. You don’t mean to; in fact, you worry a lot when you can’t find him immediately. You work through the crowd (you had no idea your school had this many people honestly), searching for him (he’s decently tall, you should be able to spot him). He’s not in the kitchen with the drinks, nor, on the patio with the stoners, nor in the living area with the dancers…did he go upstairs?

Your heart is thumping so hard right now as you imagine someone drugging your dearest friend and harvesting his kidneys (which you can fix because he can just have yours) when you squeeze behind some couple making out by the stairs. You grab the rail to steady yourself (you had two shots, but you are very much a lightweight) before you run right into him.

“Noona!”

You don’t hear that all that well (wow parties are loud), but you see his mouth form the word and everything in you just calms down. You grab him by the sleeve of his very nice pullover and drag him away from the stairs and main crowd, toward a mostly isolated corner. 

“Fuck sakes, Jeongin, I nearly had a heart attack when I couldn’t find you,” you begin before stopping to turn toward him. As you tilt your head up to meet his eyes, you sort of lose your train of thought. 

He’s looking at you differently. 

“Are you…are you okay?” you manage to get out. Maybe it’s the dim lighting, or the alcohol, or even the pulse of the music that seems to sound all the same, but your heart isn’t returning to normal rate despite finding him. 

His eyes are so dark. 

He moves into your personal space, which is hella unusual because the boy loves his own space, his head dropping just a touch. You back up a few steps, but there’s a wall that stops you. You watch, wide-eyed, as he rests his arm on the wall just above you, bracing himself.

Oh god, he’s leaning.

“Noona…” he says and now you can hear it, even though it’s mostly just breath. He’s a lot closer than he was a second ago. “Didn’t mean to worry you.”

You should reassure him, but you don’t think you can speak. Not when his mouth is inches away. 

He has a really nice mouth.

“So…did you find someone to kiss?” you squeak. You’d reminded him of that right before entering the fraternity house. He’d still looked nervous but had agreed.

He nods before cupping your cheek in his hand. 

“Oh yeah?” you might start babbling in a second. “Point ‘em out to me and maybe I–”

It’s quiet all of a sudden. All the noise mutes when his lips touch yours, soft and seeking. You haven’t kissed anyone since your boyfriend of six months in your junior year, and it’s like you forgot how nice that simple pressure can be. 

For a second or two, his mouth is still, but then you feel his tongue graze your lips and you let him in without a single thought (pretty sure your brain no longer works) and he sweeps in. 

He’s had a few drinks himself. You can taste the sweet and bitter, and it’s intoxicating. His hand wanders from your face down your neck. Light touches that make you shiver and reach out to pull him close. Your hands catch him by the hips and you pull until he’s pressed against you. 

You had forgotten how good this can feel. And he feels especially good when he breaks away to press kisses to the corner of your lips. 

“Okay?” he murmurs. “Not too much tongue?”

Your body tightens at the low timbre of his voice. God, you want all his weight heavy on you, to feel every slant, plane, curve, and angle of his body. 

“Noona?” he prompts, already pulling away when you don’t answer. Your eyes open in panic and you slide your hands into his hair and don’t let him get too far. You can see he looks surprised, but you barely think about it, returning his mouth to yours. This time it’s your tongue that gains entrance, stroking his. You feel his moan, his hands sliding down your torso to your hips and behind. His grip pushes you against him so both of you can feel exactly how hard he is.

You wiggle, trying to find the friction that might release some of the tension that has taken you over. He gasps, his breath short; he turns his head to get oxygen, but you continue to taste him, your mouth along his jawline to his neck. You tug at the collar of his pullover to you can nip around his collarbone. His fingers dig into your ass when you bite a little hard. 

Fuck, you actually want to fuck your friend.

He whimpers your name and that’s when your brain starts to work again.

Fuck, you want to fuck your friend. 

You jerk back so hard that your head hits the wall, but it barely affects you. You can see the mottled red of his skin, from your mouth and teeth.

He just wanted to kiss someone and you just took that to a whole other level. 

“Jeongin…” you try to speak, though your panting is a bit much and your body is not happy at all with such an unsatisfactory ending. 

You crave.

His gaze is back on you, and there’s trepidation in those sinfully dark eyes and you hate yourself so much in this moment.

“I’m sorry.” Because what else can you say?

His lips part and you want to kiss them so badly, but apparently, your self-control has returned. 

“You’re sorry?”

You nod quickly, emphatically. “You were just practicing and I just…I’m so sorry.” You drop your head, the euphoria of what just happened morphing into absolute shame and misery. “You’re a very good kisser and I just got caught up. I shouldn’t have. I’m sor–”

“I get it.”

You peer back up at him. His hands have left you cold, returning to the pockets of his pants. He smiles at you, but you can tell it’s uncomfortable. 

You’ve made your friend uncomfortable. 

“I’m–”

His hand covers your mouth immediately. “Don’t say it again. I get it.” He meets your eyes before dropping his hand. “I think I want another drink.” And he walks away as you slump against the wall, your head hazy and confused and your heart aching. 

–

You don’t talk about it. He finds you sometime later that night, hand on your shoulder before he asks if you’re ready to head back. As you’ve been worried sick most of the night, you agree. You walk back to your dorm, shivering in the early fall wind. 

You don’t know what to say, so you don’t say anything. 

He sleeps in your roommate’s bed, several feet away from you, and your body hums at knowing he’s there. Despite the alcohol (now effectively out of your system as you didn’t drink anything but water after that ‘incident’), you seem to remember everything about him in perfect detail, your senses overwhelmed. 

It takes you forever to fall asleep. 

The next day is awkward, but neither of you comments on it, going to breakfast in the student union. You laugh actually when you see how happy all the food choices make him and though he grumbles at you making fun of him (you’re not at all…you just really like his smile and his joy), it feels like maybe it’ll all be okay. 

Never mind that when he gets into his family’s car to head back home, you don’t hug and though that’s not that unusual, it feels like you should do something and what you really want to do is kiss him again. 

It’s like you’ve opened up Pandora’s box and it’s full of Jeongin.

–

You don’t see Jeongin during winter holidays. You and your family travel to see relatives, and he disappears during the second half of the break to go with friends on a ski trip.

With his girlfriend.

His kissing apparently worked because you’ve seen a few photos posted with him and her. He gets tagged in a lot more of her posts than him posting, but yeah. The cheerleader and he seem to have worked out.

Which is good.

Even if you feel weird about it. 

You two still message each other from time to time. He often contacts you with a question about his college application or one of the teachers he currently has (you had them all before), but he doesn’t say much about his social life. Or his romantic life.

The day of the party seems to have been a one-off. 

So, when you see him right before classes start, it’s for all of ten minutes as he has to head to his girlfriend’s party. 

“I’m so sorry,” he huffs out as he jogs to where you are, leaning on your car in the high school parking lot. It’s a good meeting point, about halfway between your homes and you’re feeling weirdly nostalgic about the place. “I thought I could hang out for maybe an hour or two, but there’s this list of things I have to pick up and–”

“It’s okay,” you interrupt him, smiling. It’s so good to see him in person. Even if his appearance seems to be improving (not that it needed to) each time you do. His hair is wavy right now, still with auburn hints and though he could wear a puffer jacket and look more put together than you, he’s wearing a beige overcoat and looks like he belongs in a fashion magazine. “You look good.”

The compliment stops him from speaking for a second. The tell-tale blush showing up on his cheeks, the little tug on his ear. 

“Uh. Thanks.” He moves to stand next to you, also leaning on your car. “Did you have a good holiday?”

You shrug. “Mostly stuck with relatives who can’t remember my name let alone what I actually care about. But it was fine.” You cross your arms as the winter wind bites through your scarf. “Yours?” You look over him. “Doesn’t look like skiing ended too badly.”

He laughs and shakes his head. “No, though I stuck mostly to the beginners’ slopes. I’ll leave the physical prowess to Min.” He stares ahead at the empty outdoor lunch tables. “I had fun.”

You nod. “Good. that’s good. And…I mean, I see the posts. Stuff is going good with your…girlfriend?”

He looks down at you. “Yeah.”

“Good.” Never mind that you sounded the awkwardest you’ve ever sounded. “Good.”

“You don’t tell me much about uni, noona. Just the occasional, ‘this happened to someone I know’.” He gently elbows you. “Do you do anything other than study and go to class?”

“I sleep and eat too.”

“Noona.”

You shrug. “This coming from you, who never ventured out unless I made you…”

“Times change.”

His words hit you in the gut, almost like you can’t breathe for half a second. Times do change. The fact that talking to him makes you a little nervous, that you try not to stare at him, the twist in your stomach remembering that he has a girlfriend…all of it tells you that the friendship you cherished the most has changed. 

And seems unlikely to ever go back to the way it was. 

You hear a vibrating sound, deduce that it isn’t yours but his and keep your very melancholy thoughts to yourself. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and glances at the screen. 

“You need to go.”

He sighs. “I’m sorry.”

You force a smile to your lips. “It’s okay. Go drink and be merry. I’m glad I got to see you. Even if just for a little bit.”

He turns toward you, in so doing blocking some of the wind, and cocks his head in thought. “You sound sad.”

“Aren’t you? We have to go back to school tomorrow.” 

He chuckles and tugs on your coat sleeve. “Give me a hug and I’ll see you later.”

You don’t question that he asks for a hug, you’re not going to question any semblance of physical affection from him. You just wrap your arms around his middle and hold him tight. He’s so very warm and solid. 

You feel his chin rest on top of your head for a brief second before he draws back. 

“Take care, noona.”

“You too, agi.” 

–

Spring semester seems like a whirlwind. It’s all dead and grey in January and February, then everything speeds up like a roller coaster on its way down. You are grateful you focused on getting all the gen ed classes out of the way, but it makes for a chaotic focus during those months. 

The only time you actually talk to Jeongin is right after his birthday.

“Noona.”

You answer the phone without thinking, assuming your parents’ have called because no one from your generation calls on the phone. 

You pause at his voice. “Jeongin.”

“This gift.”

You wrack your brain about the present you gave him. It’s a mere 40000 won gift card because you aren’t exactly rolling it in at your part-time job on campus. You’re hoping he uses the gift card when he starts to get stuff for dormitory life because, honestly, back-to-school shopping for university (not counting overpriced textbooks) is the best thing ever. 

“That gift.” You wonder if you should apologize because it’s so small, but you know Jeongin. He is not obsessed with money any more than any young person is: wishing to have more, but unable to make it yet, wondering if it will bring all happiness like the world tells you so. 

“Noona,” he is not impressed with your cluelessness. “The attachment.”

Oh.

So one of the few friends you’ve made at uni, who you feel pretty comfortable with, is Jisung. You met him in freshman composition, and though your majors are massively and diametrically opposed, you two keep up. He’s in computer science and you’re in the social sciences (possibly anthropology, but who knows). He is constantly working on new ideas for apps, software, games; often starting one project one day and then abandoning it for another the next. 

The only reason you know this is because you often crash at their (he and his roommate Hyunjin) off-campus apartment. It’s quieter and less…well, dorm-y. Because of that, you see and hear about the constant line of projects come and go for Jisung. One of the projects that stuck around for a bit was what you sent Jeongin.

A digital fashion book (more like an online photo album, but the appearance was pretty slick, as was the way the pages turned, annotating photo captions and linking to original sites) entitled “What I’d Get Jeongin If I Had Money…And Fashion Sense.” 

You’d done your research, looking at recent trends and articles (okay headlines because you cannot read an entire article on fashion) and perused the interwebs for clothing pieces you thought might look nice on Jeongin, inputting it into Jisung’s program (with his help - only with the computery stuff…he was about as helpless as you about fashion) to create the final product. It was both a gift and help for Jisung with an assignment as he needed some example of what he’d been working on for one of his computer classes, you just changed Jeongin’s name for him to turn in.

“So you liked it?” you ask tentatively. You had second-guessed yourself a million times since sending it. Was it too much? Did it look like you paid way too much attention? Was it stupid? Was it a really bad representation of what his friendship meant to you? Were the pieces you picked all horrible?

There is a pause on the other end of the phone call. “It’s brilliant.”

You slump in relief, your head landing on your pillow. “Yeah?”

“No, really. This is cool. I like everything you picked out.” He chuckles. “Maybe my fashion has rubbed off on you.”

“We can only hope.”

He laughs again. “Really. This is…this is nice.”

You hear beyond his words. What you sent matters to him. And maybe in knowing that, he knows that he matters to you. 

The phone call doesn’t last much longer after that. You ask about how his birthday went, and he tells you about going out with his girlfriend and friends even though he kinda wanted to stay in. But it was fun and he doesn’t feel any different being eighteen. You promise to tell Jisung that he liked his gift (you’ve mentioned Jisung and his roommates a time or two) and that you’d be at graduation to see Jeongin in cap and gown. 

“And I’ll see you on campus next year,” he says as the call wraps up. 

“I know. I had no idea the film department here was something that interested you.”

“We’ll see. I like movies…and thinking too much about movies sometimes. Maybe it’s a good idea. Maybe it’s a bad one.”

“It’s just a choice, Jeongin. You can always change it if you want to.”

He sighs. “Yeah. Choices still have to be made though.”

You wonder if he has other choices on his mind and you want to ask, but you are still a bit reticent regarding what you can and can’t talk to him about. 

You wonder if his girlfriend knows enough about him to understand that he hadn’t wanted to go out for his birthday.

“I better go…” he continues. “Talk later?”

“Yeah. Talk later.”

“Thanks again for this…both gifts.”

You hang up soon after that and though you were in the middle of reading for class, you stare at your ceiling for a few minutes, wondering if having Jeongin on campus will either get you two back to the friendship you used to have or just spiral this crush even more.

–

You survive your freshman year. No flying colors on grades or anything, but acceptable passes, even a few above averages.  There isn’t much fanfare on completing your first year of college, but there is when you graduate high school, so you make plans to slip into the high school gymnasium on that Saturday after you move home to see Jeongin walk across the stage. 

He looks so tall.

You clap as enthusiastically as you can without bringing attention to yourself, though it doesn’t matter because quite a few students cheer for him (he did get popular). The whole ceremony is a weird thing to sit through once you’re on the other side, but the nostalgia is nice. 

Almost makes you think high school was a pleasant thing (it wasn’t, anyone who says it was you will never trust). 

When it’s over, you start to head toward the parking lot thinking that you’ll message him later, but you hear your name shouted. You turn to see him, graduation robe unzipped and flying behind him a bit like a superhero cape.

He bounds up to you, all smiles and joy. 

God. Look at him.

“Hi,” you say when he stops in front of you.

“You came.”

Now you’re the one blushing and embarrassed. You drop your gaze. “Of course. You came to mine.”

He makes an unimpressed sound. “Seungmin.”

You laugh and look back up. “Okay. You came because of Seungmin, but fair is fair.”

He hugs you. No warning at all. He’s as warm as the day is, right on the verge of too hot. 

“Congrats for surviving, agi,” you mutter into his shoulder before he draws back.

“Thanks.” He beams at you, clearly on a high of finally being done. “There’s a party tonight. Wanna come?”

You raise an eyebrow. “Of graduates?”

He nods.

“I…hmmm…”

He laughs at your reluctance. “Okay, noona. But soon. We’ll hang out?”

You nod. “Yeah. Go back to your family.” You ‘shoo’ him away. He laughs again before squeezing your hand. 

“Thank you for coming.” And he disappears back into the crowd of family and students. 

You walk back to your car, shaking your head at how much damn fluttering your heart did during that five minutes of interaction. 

–

The summer post-freshman year has been…normal. You work to get some extra money, catch up with a few high school friends who are home as well. 

But you spend most of your time with Jeongin. 

“Your girlfriend…doesn’t mind?” You ask him late in June after realizing that you have seen him three days in a row (he’s also gotten a job at the mall you work at; though he’s at a clothing store and you avidly blend smoothies for people).

You’re both on break (you and he may have tried to get your shifts at similar times so you can have lunch together) and he’s scrolling through his phone after finishing a box of fried chicken. 

“Doesn’t mind what?”

You poke at your pasta with your fork. “Us hanging out so much?”

He cocks his head to the side as he looks up from his phone. “Well…it’s not really a thing.”

“What’s not a thing?”

“She and I aren’t… a thing.”

“You’re not?” You’re so confused right now.

He shrugs. “She’s traveling all this summer and wanted not to be ‘tied down’ and I guess…” He trails off. “I guess it didn’t bother me that she felt that way. Which seems like maybe I didn’t want to be tied down either.” 

“Oh.”

He smirks. “We never talk about this, noona. Why are you so interested?”

You poke at your pasta again. “I just thought it was weird that you hadn’t said anything about her. That’s a big part of your life…a significant other.” You swallow. “I am trying to be a good friend here.” You lift your chin, daring him to argue.

He laughs and steals your fork to take a bite of your food. “Don’t try so hard. It’s weird.” 

“Thanks.”

He chews slowly before speaking again. “It’s okay, you know? I liked her, but it wasn’t…we weren’t…” he shrugs again. “We just weren’t.”

He meets your gaze.

“I’m okay.”

You nod. “Okay.”

He glances at his phone. “But you’re not because you only have a minute left.”

You curse and jump out of your seat, moving to clean up, but he waves you off.

“I got it, noona.” He smiles again at you and you just want to hug him. 

–

Life at university with Jeongin is something. You’re happy to have him near again. Neither of you has a single class together, but you never did in high school, so that’s not new. Whether by happenstance or an unconscious intention on both your parts, you make sure to have lunch or coffee with each other at least once a week; though usually twice. There’s something enjoyable about hearing his new experiences with classes and classmates, and dorm life. He shares things with you via messages but it’s much more fun to see his facial expressions and hear his voice intonations when he imitates a certain professor or classmate. 

You introduce him to Jisung (and subsequently Hyunjin) and they all click like they’ve known each other forever. They baby Jeongin a little bit and you know it gets on his nerves (you’re pretty good at reading his subtle tics when he’s with others), but he also seems to enjoy having big brothers nearby (you know he misses Seungmin because you miss Changbin even if neither of you wants to admit how much you love your older brothers). Sometimes you find out later that he’s been hanging out with them, without you, and though it’s annoying for him to steal your friends, you also don’t mind much because well…it’s Jeongin.

Who you might be a little in love with.

Perhaps that isn’t a revelation to anyone if they’d been inside your mind for the last year or so, but to you, it’s kind of a smack in the face. This is Jeongin, your best friend since he was fourteen and you were fifteen. You don’t believe in stories about childhood best friends to lovers as they always seemed a bit too idealistic to be real. You know that he can smell gross when he comes in from mowing his parents’ yard. You’ve seen him when he gets out of bed in the morning (nope, never mind that’s not a bad image and you need to stop thinking immediately). 

He’s just Jeongin, your friend who can be a little quiet, a lot savage, who loves fashion and movies and often looks at you like you’ve grown another head when you start talking about how eastern culture deals with death in healthier ways than western culture. 

You deal with this epiphany like you deal with most things: acknowledge it, but don’t do anything about it.

Winter break comes and goes with little fanfare. Jeongin tells you that he’s moving in with Jisung and Hyunjin and you make a face at him because why does he get to live off campus as a freshman when you’re still stuck on campus as a sophomore. You send a message to Jisung saying basically the same thing, and both of them assure you that you can crash there any time you need to get away and that they are protecting you by not letting you move in because they’re boys and are gross.

You’re somewhat appeased.

–

“A party?” 

Jeongin is nodding as Jisung spins in his office chair for no reason other than the fact that he has an office chair that rolls and spins. You’re on Jisung’s bed with Jeongin, avoiding your research work for an hour or so by listening to Jisung ramble on about some anime that he and the rest of the apartment have gotten into. 

You make a note to consider studying why animes capture teen and 20-something boys the way they do.

“We’re having a party,” Jisung repeats, like his mentioning it wasn’t out of the blue. “A welcome party for Innie, for the new semester, for the fact that none of us ever go to parties which shows just how pathetic we are in our college lives.”

“I’ve been to college parties,” you say before the weight of those words hits you. You try to glance at Jeongin without too much obviousness. He meets your gaze and you can’t hear Jisung’s words for at least a minute.

You look away, the memory of that party flooding your brain, your senses. You’ve kissed since then, haven’t you? A kiss isn’t that big a deal…even if you have feelings…it’s just a kiss. 

Jisung stops spinning in his chair and looks at the both of you. “What?”

You clear your throat. “Nothing.”

“Bullshit.” He points at Jeongin. “Spill.”

Jeongin has never been easily intimidated by anyone, especially Jisung. He points back. “No.” 

That doesn’t stop your hyperactive friend. “Ohhhhhh.”

Which annoys the shit out of you.

“Oh god, it’s nothing, okay?” You throw up your hands, frustrated that this event still holds so much sway over you. “He came out to visit last year, and came to a party with me, we both were drunk and kissed. That’s it. Just a drunk, dumb thing.”

Jisung starts cackling at your confession, but in your peripheral, you see Jeongin focus on you. 

“It wasn’t that dumb,” he says so softly that you don’t think Jisung hears, before getting up off the bed. “I have to finish watching two more silent films for class.” He cuffs Jisung on the head as he leaves the bedroom. Jisung rubs his head before looking at you. 

“So…you coming to the party?”

–

You’re in the corner of the hallway and living area of the guys’ apartment. You’re nursing a red solo cup of some concoction that Hyunjin handed you when you walked into the kitchen. You don’t know what you expected from this party, but this many people was not it. You apparently had blocked out the idea that anyone existed outside the bubble of the four of you though you recognize a fair amount of people milling about. 

So you could go talk to them.

But you stay where you are, watching. 

Your eyes find Jeongin more often than not (the radar you have for him is hella annoying). Currently, he’s talking to two girls you don’t know…maybe freshmen like him. They’re pretty; smiling and gazing at him like they see exactly how stupidly attractive your friend is.

You begrudgingly admire them for actually making their interest known. Even if you seethe just a little.

“Talking to people is not the worst thing, you know.”

“Go away, Sung.” You reply without looking over at him. You can see him sway slightly from drink, which explains why the introvert is telling you to go talk to people. 

He bumps shoulders with you. “But you’re one of my favorites.”

You smile and glance at him. “But I rank below Jeongin?”

“Everyone ranks below Innie,” he tells you. “You’re above Hyunjin, though. If that helps.”

You laugh and lean back in your little corner, glancing back at Jeongin and his two admirers. 

You can feel Jisung watching you, then at where you’re watching. He says your name quietly and you know, you just know that he sees exactly what you hope no one sees because he can be really perceptive. 

You shake your head, wondering if maybe what you’ve been drinking has had more of an effect than you realized. 

“I think I just want to kiss someone,” you say, knowing deep down that that isn’t the damn problem, but you can be stubborn and you could use a distraction. You finish up what’s left in the cup and meet Jisung’s gaze. “Ever thought about kissing me?”

His eyebrows shoot straight up, eyes go wide. “Um…yes?”

“Really?”

He shrugs. “I mean, I kinda think that about anyone I find hot. At some point.”

“That’s reasonable.” You tilt your head up. “Want to?”

“Just cause?” 

You nod. He shrugs again and leans in to press his lips against yours. Your eyes close and you can smell that he’s been drinking tequila. His fingers settle on your waist before his mouth parts and his tongue meets yours tentatively. 

Okay, he’s pretty good at this. 

“What is going on here?”

Hyunjin’s voice breaks the two of you apart, which is both a relief and an annoyance. Jisung mumbles something, face pink with embarrassment as you glare at Hyunjin. 

“You’re not that stupid, are you?” you ask him. He smirks at you. 

“Why are you kissing Sungie?”

“I kissed her,” Jisung protests weakly. “She asked me too.”

“Oh yeah?” 

“Kinda missed kissing someone,” you say, rolling your eyes before looking back to where Jeongin still was. One less girl, but they are a lot closer to each other. “Want to?”

As different as Hyunjin and Jisung are, they have both the same surprised expression when you proposition them like this. Eyebrows up, widened eyes. 

You reach out to grab the open collar of his shirt, tugging him a little. 

“Scared?”

He scoffs and braces his arm next to your head (kudos to him for that classic move) before meeting you halfway. You hear Jisung make some sort of nonsensical exclamation when Hyunjin immediately slips his tongue in your mouth. 

It’s good. Of course it’s good. Especially when your brain is a little hazy from drink and your body more than touch-starved. Hyunjin’s hand sneaks up under the hem of your top and you shiver.

“Noona?”

You jerk back to see Jeongin approaching this weird set-up with bewilderment all over his face. 

Hyunjin glances at his roommate and gestures toward you. “Your turn.”

Jeongin shoots a look at Hyunjin, then you, then at Jisung. Then you again. 

“What is going on?”

Your heart is pounding with his eyes on you. Even in your intoxication, you know that despite the talent Jisung and Hyunjin have at kissing, if Jeongin kisses you…

You brush it off, shaking away your hyperawareness of the tiny peek of collarbone you can see because of the wide collar of Jeongin’s t-shirt. 

Your teeth ache.

“Just wanted a kiss.” 

He doesn’t look away from you or the defiant lift of your chin. He moves close as Hyunjin draws back to let him and wraps an arm around Jisung’s shoulder, utterly amused. You can’t take your eyes off Jeongin’s mouth as he gets nearer. 

He doesn’t touch you. His hands stay in his jeans pockets as his lips brush your cheek so lightly that you aren’t even sure if it’s real. 

You ball up your hands into fists in a conscious effort not to grab him and pull him to you. Because as little as it is, his touch unravels you.

When your eyes open, he’s not looking at you, but pushing away Jisung who is attempting to kiss him. 

“Come on, if you’d kissed her lips it would have been an indirect kiss…Finally, baby boy!!” Jisung reaches out for the younger as Hyunjin snickers, trying to keep Jisung from mauling Jeongin. It’s playful tussling and it’s enough of a distraction for you to slip away. 

You toss your empty cup into the kitchen trash, avoiding bumping any of the party attendees as your heart tries to return to a normal speed. 

You find another quiet corner, this time on the balcony of their apartment. It’s chilly out there, so people only come out to grab a quick smoke or get a gulp of fresh air. You’re so quiet and unobtrusive that you’re only noticed about half the time. 

Leaving the party immediately after kissing three different guys seems too obvious, so you’re going to wait until it’s nearly one am before you make your respectable departure. You had planned to stay and help clean up while crashing on their couch but you can’t do that now. 

You can’t be near him when all your feelings just want to burst out. Burst out singing and dancing on the kitchen counter like a poorly-made musical.

You let your head rest on the brick wall behind you, the railing of the balcony digging into your hip. You don’t adjust away from the slight pain. The pain feels a bit deserved for your stupidity and it keeps the fogginess at bay. 

Maybe you need some space. Maybe seeing him multiple times a week is making this worse. Maybe distance would help you move on. 

Maybe falling for your best friend is the stupidest thing you’ve ever done.

The sliding glass door opens and closes. You don’t look over, not wanting whatever random person to think that you want to engage in interaction. You glance at your phone for the time, thinking that you can probably make your exit now. You don’t even have to say goodbye. The guys will be too wrapped up in socialization to worry about you. 

You know it’s him when he leans against the wall next to you. He smells like his cologne and coconut rum. 

Your heart responds accordingly.

He doesn’t say anything for several seconds. Nor do you. You haven’t processed through everything yet. You haven’t gotten back to your usual self around him and if you speak, you know he’ll know.

And he can’t know. Because if he does, everything is irreparable and you can’t handle that.

He takes a deep breath before shivering. 

“You should put on a jacket, agi,” you say quietly. 

“You should too.”

You’re in a long-sleeve thin sweater, so it’s not as ridiculous as Jeongin in a t-shirt in February weather. 

“You don’t want to get sick before your birthday.”

You can feel his eyes on you then and it takes all your self-control not to look back. Because you know, you know that if you do you’ll just want to take his mouth, let your hands explore the planes of his body, feel his hair between your fingers, hear his sighs and groans, breathe in all of him so the alcohol you’ve consumed has nothing on the mere intoxication of him. 

Seconds pass. He shivers again.

“Go in,” you say casually. “I’m gonna head back to the dorm anyway.” You force your eyes up to make eye contact. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

His thumb is at your bottom lip before you have time to register that he’s moved. His thumb brushes over your bottom lip then the top as he leaves his spot to stand facing you. 

“Jeongin…”

He’s staring at you, eyes so clear in the night, not even glassy with tipsiness. He cups your chin with his hand, long fingers grazing your cheek. His other hand takes yours, fingers lacing together as the space between your bodies lessens centimeter by centimeter. 

“Don’t go,” he whispers with his lips mere breaths away from yours. “Stay.” He gently wipes your lips again. “I am not kissing Jisung-hyung or Hyunjin-hyung.” There is a petulance in his voice that makes you half-laugh despite feeling like you can’t move. “Why did you?” His gaze slides from your mouth back to your eyes. 

“I just…” How do you explain any of this to him? How do you put into words your feelings that you know you shouldn’t share? “I thought it would help.”

His hand tightens around yours. “Help what?”

“Not wanting to kiss you.” It pours out of you, like a dam that could never be held back. 

You see the curve of the edge of his mouth, the self-satisfaction. “Did it work?”

Words are pointless. He knows; you’ve basically admitted everything. Why is he asking? You can feel your entire body lean toward him as though he’s some sort of human version of gravity, pulling you. 

So you don’t use words. You just kiss his fingertips that are still lingering near. You hear the slight catch in his breath before he removes his fingers and covers your lips with his. His arm wraps around you, pressing you against him so tightly you think you can feel his heart beat against yours. His mouth opens, his kisses wet and hot and you can only cling to his shoulders, on your toes to meet this surge of want. 

Your brain shuts down and you can’t think. You can only focus on how he feels under your fingers, how he tastes (that coconut rum), the sound of his sharp pants of breath. When he draws away to gasp, you open your eyes to stare at his swollen lips. 

He is so pretty. 

You stumble closer, lips pressing along his jawline. He turns to kiss you again, letting go of your hand to slide under your thigh, lifting so your leg is at his hip. He rocks into you, making you break the kiss, and your head falls back against the brick. It doesn’t deter him, his mouth skimming down your neck, letting his teeth graze your skin. 

You bite your lower lip to keep from making a sound, though he must hear something because he looks up at you. 

With a smirk so damn knowing, he tugs you closer against him by your leg, pressing firm enough to make you squirm and he laughs.

He laughs.

It’s breathless, but you can’t help but scowl at him for laughing. He kisses your unhappy expression; your forehead, nose, and lips. He lets go of your leg, framing your face in his hands. 

“I changed my mind,” he speaks so softly. 

Your heart freezes.

“You did?”

He nods, his eyes darting back and forth over your features. 

“Don’t stay here. Let’s leave. Your roommate isn’t there?”

You shake your head (she’s never there) but it takes several seconds for what he’s saying to actually sink in. He’s asking. He’s wanting.

Oh. Oh wow.

“You want to–”

He straightens, his hands leaving your face and you grab one, afraid for him to be too far away. 

“I thought…” He swallows. “I thought you wanted to.”

He apparently cannot perceive how your body is thrumming.

“Jeongin…” You attempt to catch your breath. “We…we’ve been drinking.”

He rolls his eyes, though he doesn’t pull away from your grasp. “I’m not drunk. You aren’t drunk. I’ve seen you drunk.” He watches you for a second. “Do you want to?”

“Yes.” You close your eyes as what feels like the second confession comes out. “Yes. So much. But you…we…”

The balcony door opens then and several party-goers fall out onto the small space. He gets closer to you, as though you need a buffer between you and them. He drops his head so he can speak in your ear. 

“Let me walk you back?”

–

He grabs a jacket before leading you out of their apartment. He even grabs an extra of his hoodies to wrap you in before you even hit the outside. 

“Jeongin, I’m fine. It’s not that far.”

He doesn’t argue but zips up the hoodie for you and you just make a face at him. His answering smile is innocent, but then he takes your hand in his and starts to walk. You nearly trip after him, thrown by the ease with which he holds your hand. Like it’s nothing and everything all at once. 

You want to say something, the cold air is making any intoxication excuse for your blatant honesty about your feelings pretty null and void, but you can’t. You don’t know what to say. 

“At that party,” he begins slowly, looking over at you once. The streetlight is behind him so you can’t see his expression which doesn’t help your low-level panic at everything that has happened this night at all. “Last year. The party.” You see him swallow. 

He didn’t seem nervous five minutes ago, his teeth on your skin. 

“Yeah?” 

“You said you were sorry.” He pauses at the intersection, looking both ways before leading you along. “I thought that you didn’t like it. That you regretted it.” He takes a deep breath. “That you didn’t want me.”

You stop immediately so he is almost jerked back by your linked hands. You can see his face better now, more streetlights to illuminate. His features look sharper with the shadows cast under his cheekbones and along his jaw and neck. 

“Noona?” he prompts you because you’ve definitely forgotten what you meant to say in your staring at his unearthly face. 

“Oh. No. Um…” Now it’s your turn to take a big breath. “Fuck, Jeongin, this is…we’re friends and I don’t want to–”

“It’s way too late for that,” he answers, the same note of frustration in his words as in yours. “I can’t pretend that didn’t happen.” He gestures back toward their apartment. “That I didn’t want that.” 

Something tight in your chest loosens just slightly at his words. Maybe, just maybe.

“I said I was sorry because I felt bad. That I took advantage. That you were just trying to get some practice or experience and I like…mauled you.” You decide to stare at the sidewalk as it seems safer. “You were drunk and I just near assaulted you.”

You hear a snort, a laugh and that makes you look up at him. He’s covered his mouth as though that will lessen the fact that he’s laughing. Again.

You try and pull your hand away from his, but he’s stronger than you and just tightens his grip.

“I had no idea you were an asshole.”

He shakes his head, the laughing dying too. He tugs you close, arm wrapping around you in a hug. 

“You didn’t assault me,” he murmurs in your hair before pressing a kiss on top of your head. “I wanted you just as much as I hope…I hope you wanted me.”

That same knot in your chest loosens even more. “Really?”

He draws back so you can actually see him. “You didn’t know? You didn’t know that I’ve had a crush on you pretty much since we met?”

“What?”

He laughs again, but it’s embarrassed now, shy. 

“This pretty, older girl just starts talking to me and becomes my friend despite having no classes together, just two brothers on the same baseball team. Of course, I liked you.”

“But…” You try and wrap your brain around this information. “Your girlfriend.”

His smile saddens. “I figured, you know,…there was no way you’d ever like me back. Should try and move on.”

“I’m sorry.” The very idea that you could and did hurt his feelings makes you want to throw bean bags at past you. “I’m so sorry.”

“I didn’t tell you. How could you know? I thought it was obvious.” He stares at you for a few moments. “Jisung-hyung and Hyunjin-hyung figured it out like four months ago.”

Were you that stupid?

“Come on,” he picks up leading you back to your dorm, which is a good thing because you don’t know if you could find anything with the way your brain is currently unable to compute. 

It’s really not that far and by the time both of you enter your dorm room, your brain is running again, but this time it’s on the entire ‘no roommate…you brought a boy home’ train. 

“Do…you want…uh…I think I have coke?” You undo his hoodie from your frame and set it on the small sofa that you have set under your lofted bed. You open the mini fridge, trying to remember if you actually have coke?

“Noona, I’m okay.” You can hear him sttle on the sofa, rustling of clothes as he takes off his jacket. “You okay?”

You shut the minifridge door and look over at him. His head is tilted to the side in question. 

“I’m…processing.”

He laughs and pats the spot next to him. “Process next to me.”

You do sit next to him, though it’s tentative. He gazes at you for several seconds before leaning in to kiss you softly, his hand coming to cup your chin. 

“Why are you still processing?” he asks, his lips not far. 

“I’ve kinda spent over a year trying to not think about you like that.” You kiss him back and he manuevers you carefully so you’re sitting in his lap, facing him. “Smooth,” you comment, feeling your face heat.

He smirks at you before resting his hands at your hips, squeezing them gently. You touch his hair, watching his face as his eyes close. You card your fingers through the strands, messing up whatever style he had going on this evening. He hums contentedly before opening his eyes again. 

“So…this is a thing.”

He laughs again and sits up, hands sliding to your lower back, eyes alight with mischief. 

“Use your college vocabulary, noona.”

“I hate you.”

“No. You don’t.” There’s a hint of bafflement in his voice as he leans in to kiss you. 

Your mock-annoyance melts. “No I don’t.” You let your lips linger on his. “I guess I can’t call you ‘agi’ anymore.”

He makes a face. “I don’t mind, but it’s a little weird?” You feel his fingers slip under the top of your jeans, fire against your skin. 

“Jagiya?”

You feel him tremble just slightly. “Yeah, that’s good.” His hand slides farther down and this time you tremble. “Are you still noona?” You can feel his smug grin against your mouth.

“Um…” Never mind that you can barely concentrate to speak with his hands on your ass. “Sure? Sure.”

“Good.” He squeezes, making you yelp. With that irrepressible smile, carefully turns and lays you down on the sofa, settling on top of you. 

Your eyes flutter close at his weight. 

“Do you have a condom?”

You feel him still and you open your eyes.

“Um.”

The blush, despite the mere fact he’s on top of you, is beyond endearing. 

“No,” he replies. “You?” He glances around your dorm room.

“Nope.”

“Why not?” he asks, eyes bright despite the fact you only have your fairy lights turned on in the room. 

“I didn’t…It’s been awhile, Yang Jeongin. Don’t judge.” 

He chuckles and kisses you softly, tongue meeting yours just enough to make you want before he draws back.

“I’m sure my roommate does somewhere, but…”

He waits, one hand tracing your ear and the other bracing himself against the couch. 

“I’m not saying I don’t want to. I just…I swear an hour ago I was telling myself that I needed to get over you.”

He nods, meeting your lips again. “And I haven’t even taken you out on a proper date.”

“Jeongin…that’s beside–” He interrupts your incoherent words, kissing you deeper.

“It’s okay, noona. I like kissing you.”

You cover your face with your hands. “That’s my line.”

He kisses the back of your hands before you peer through your fingers to look at him. He’s staring at you fondly, thoughtful. 

“Can I stay with you?”

You lean up to kiss him, hands sliding through his hair. He doesn’t pull away, sliding one hand under your top and along your side. You twitch a little at the ticklishness and you can feel his smile. 

“You can stay, jagiya.”

--

© yoongihan 2023. please do not steal, translate, repost, or whatever. stray kids belong to themselves and all idols used in this piece are just the inspiration for characters and do not in any way reflect the actual humans.

[locke-esque-monster]

I had a sudden thought come to me about TUA season 4 today that I haven't come across anyone talking about yet: The CIA doesn't have jurisdiction on US persons/soil.

I'm not an expert on the subject but a quick search generally defines that the CIA can't do anything that the CIA is doing during season 4. That's the FBI's role.

So we have no context about how Five has advanced this far in the CIA at the point season 4 begins. I can only assume he and the others got fake paperwork to immerse themselves in the world. (I'd argue it actually makes a lot more sense that all the characters have effectively entry level or self-made jobs, both from lack of experience and lack of work history/real world skills, which is harder to fake than papers).

Five's young, but I'd bet he got ID that aged him up a couple of years, and he's smart enough to compensate for the fact his educational history is also probably faked. But he's got to have had some damn good fakes to slide past the CIA.

But he's clearly established and has a good rapport with his boss, and we have no context for that. And we start in the middle - he's already investigating The Keepers. So he's past the point he would have questioned the order to do that. Which says one of 3 things happened:

Five has questioned his boss why he's breaking the rules and the boss gave him a good reason he could live with.

Five has some sort of deal with the boss that he follows sketchy orders either by mutual agreement because his history/papers are suspect but the boss likes him, or blackmail from the boss because the boss wants someone on his payroll he has a hold over for less reputable tasks.

The writers have straight up forgotten or changed Five's personality without warning.

There's no way Five (or at least seasons 1-3 Five) did not know or would not easily figure out on day one the CIA's jurisdiction. And Five has never found an authority he won't question. But previous seasons have also taught us that Five will work with someone he disagrees with, IF he has a good motivation.

But you're telling me that Five worked for the CIA for an extended period of time, and never questioned his boss for clear violations like investigating or being in charge of crime scenes on US soil? AND his boss was so obviously suspicious Luther put it together in 1 day with the man? Well, I call serious BS.

Keep in mind - this is the man that lasted ONE DAY working at the main office of the Commission before questioning all authority and blowing half of it up.

Just rolling along with his boss breaking the rules with no explanation why in no way resembles the Five we as the audience know prior to season 4. And the writers don't even give us the decency to try to explain how Five changed in the interim or why.

So at the end of the day - we're kind of back at shitty writing no matter the choice - either by omitting scenes to make a character motivation make any sense, or by forgetting/not realizing they changed the character so drastically they need to explain why he changed.

[kisspromptsforthelovesquare]

Kisses under an umbrella

One last kiss before I sacrifice myself/risk it all for you

Jumping on the other kiss

“I thought I’d lost you” kiss

Detransformed but still pre-reveal kiss

Romantic sewer kiss

We just won/lost an akuma battle kiss

“In case we don't make it out of this alive" kiss

“I just found out your identity and I don’t think it’s physically possible to keep my lips off your face now” kiss

Formal kiss

We're platonically cuddling on a chilly patrol night when we're making each other laugh so much we spur-in-the-moment kiss

Sleepy/half-asleep kiss

“I forgot you’re dating my other identity” kiss

Someone’s hanging upside down kiss (aka Spiderman kiss)

Blowing a kiss

“Someone claimed to be dating you and I couldn’t contradict them” jealous kiss

“Your suit’s in the way” kiss

“Your suit’s not in the way anymore!” kiss

Someone just lost their memory kiss

He/she just said yes kiss

"Kiss it better" kiss

Celebratory kiss

Kiss for the camera

Kiss they think is secret but actually lots of people can see, or getting caught kissing

Forehead kiss

"Did you know that kissing is good for hiding in plain sight, because it makes people uncomfortable so they look away?" (aka fake out make out)

I got jealous how you smiled (politely) at that civilian who was obviously (except to you) flirting with you

Kiss on a dare

André got akumatized again and he's leaving couples alone kiss

True love's kiss worked before let's try it again kiss

We need to make our fake dating look convincing kiss

Hello kiss, or goodbye kiss

Distracting your injured partner from pain while you patch them up kiss

She mixed up her words and asked for a kiss by accident but he just went with it kiss

“It’s not fair that you remember kissing me and I don’t” kiss

“I need you to stop punning for like FIVE SECONDS, so I’m going to occupy your mouth in a different way” kiss

The akuma is a huge Ladynoir shipper and it's the only way out kiss

“Sure I’ll help you practice confessing to Buttercup” kiss

“Thanks for saving my life” Ladrien or Marichat kiss

Anywhere but the face kiss: hand kiss, wrist kiss, shoulder kiss

One corner of the square kissing to prove another corner isn’t dating kiss

You were going in for la bise and I read into it kiss

“I’m/You’re using a different miraculous today” kiss

Spin the bottle kiss

“I know I said I wanted to keep our relationship a secret but…” kiss

"What do you mean you're moving away?!" kiss 

Welcome home kiss

"I want my first kiss to be with someone that I love and trust, but it's not that I'm IN love with you or anything hahaha no way" kiss

Kiss you to sleep, or kiss you awake

"Distracting you while you're trying to do something because I want attention" kiss

"Oh no, you made me fall in love with you" realization kiss

"Kissing your forehead/cheek while I thought you were sleeping" kiss (bonus if the 'asleep' person was actually unconscious and the kissing person is all "please come back to me.") 

Kiss during Second Chance

Anniversary kiss

“I thought this was just dancing, so how did we start kissing?” kiss

“We just fought and I’m mad at what you did, but I want you to know I’m not mad at you” kiss

“You fell asleep on public transport and I’m waking you up at our stop” kiss

“It’s been years since we’ve seen each other and I didn’t know what happened to you because of secret identities” kiss

“Reunion” kiss but one of them has the kwagatama ability to talk to the other through reunion and their lips can’t even touch because one is a ghost :(( 

Winning a bet kiss

Drunk kiss

Soft kiss after wrapping them in a blanket

Kiss on an old injury

“Our friends are trying to set us up, haha, let’s humor them” kiss

Sneaking into each other’s room kiss

“I’m pretty sure the grimoire says something about kissing, but I’m not sure exactly what. Want to help me experiment?” kiss

Apology kiss

Kissing while using one of the suit power-ups

“We’re both so busy that we’ve barely seen each other in days, so we should make the most of it” kiss

Kissing under the mistletoe

Kissing in a car

Identity reveal kiss

“Let’s recreate our first/favorite kiss”

Kissing backstage after a fashion show

“We should be focusing on this battle but, wow, you are extra distracting today” kiss

First kiss, or last kiss

“I know it’s the worst possible time for a kiss but…”

Failed kiss or interrupted kiss

Kiss as a confession/to show you how I really feel

Post-reveal pre-relationship kiss

Kisses that tickle

“We found our way back to each other” kiss

Soulmate kiss

Everyday domestic bliss kiss 

A kiss to comfort

“Why exactly are you kissing me?”

“Oh yeah? What are you willing to do to get a kiss from me? 😏” kiss

Accidental lip contact during la bise

Kissing in a disco

"What's the difference between le bisou and la bise? Hmm, let me show you..." 

“Maybe this will jog your memory” kiss

“I was going for the cheek/forehead and I missed 😳” kiss

Sealing a pinky swear with a kiss

"Will you marry me?" kiss

"I just love you so much, I can't help it" kiss

Fake dating kiss

A safe for work “not safe for work” kiss (like they’re standing on a forklift or something - what were YOU thinking?)

Interrupted by kids. Or a hamster. Or a kwami. 

 "Miracle cure brought you back" kiss

“Here’s your present” kiss

A kiss that promises forever

---

More info below:

I hope you wanted a long list of kiss prompts for the Love Square this Valentine's Day! What better way to celebrate a day of love than with our favorite lovesick dorks. 🥰

Use this list however you want. As an ask game, a challenge to draw or write every one, or just pick your favorites!

(For more fun, here's a random number spinner that you can set to any number you want.)

Feel free to use any version of them you want, too. Multimouse, Cat Walker, Dragon Bug, Chat Blanc, or stick to the original four-cornered square, if that's your thing!

Tag @kisspromptsforthelovesquare and we'll reblog. Marinette and Adrien's love for each other is forever. Just like the offer of reblogging. There's no time limit.

There's also a collection on AO3. Feel free to post there instead/as well.

Have fun everyone! Go and make them smooch!

Thank you to the wonderful @ladyofthenoodle for the header, and for our Discord group with their kiss suggestions.

[jazminrhode1]

Heyyyyy Jaz, I love your writing sm (I'm sure you hear that a lot). If you do have time can you plz plz write something where the reader has a crush on Matt but, he has a gf? Take it how you want tysm xx

If I Can’t Have You Matt Sturniolo x Reader One Shot

Summary: You’re friends with Matt, you have a crush on him but, he has a girlfriend.

Word Count: 1294 words

The hardest pill to swallow was that he wasn’t yours. Matt had started dating his girlfriend 6 months ago and you had slowly been distancing yourself. You felt horrible. He was happy and you couldn’t find it in yourself to be happy for him.

You had almost run out of excuses as to why you couldn’t come around anymore. You knew that made you a terrible friend but, your heart couldn’t stand seeing him with her.

She was perfect and perfect for him. She was funny, she was kind, she was beautiful, she was patient and she even liked Pokemon Go. If Matt had a list of traits that would make up his perfect girl, she checked all the boxes.

You wished there was something to hate about her. You wished you could find a reason to validate your feelings. There weren’t any. The truth was that you missed your shot. You had spent almost every day with him for the past 2 years and nothing ever happened between you. Not a longing glance, not a stolen kiss, nothing.

Chris had invited you to their birthday party. You wanted to say ‘no’ but, all your friends were going and it was surely going to be a lot of fun. You figured there would be enough people there to keep you from bumping into the happy couple and, if not, you could always hide in the bathroom.

As you walked upstairs with your besties in tow, you realized that there were way more people here than you had anticipated. A couple of people you knew, mostly people you didn’t - maybe this was going to be fun.

Nick pulled you into a hug at the top of the stairs. “When the fuck did I last see you?” he yelled over the music. He introduced you to a few of his friends - he was in his element.

“Hello, stranger,” Chris said as he walked towards you. “I nearly forgot that you existed,” he joked as he gave you a hug.

You scanned the room, as you always did, looking for Matt. You used to make a B-line toward him but, now you were hoping that he wasn’t there.

“Can I get you a drink or something?” Chris asked, gesturing to the fridge. You shook your head as you looked around.

Chris grabbed your shoulders with his hands and shook you gently. “What's going on? Will you try and have some fun?” he asked playfully. There were times he annoyed the shit out of you but, he had a softer side too.

He didn’t know how you felt about Matt, no one did. He initially thought you and Matt had a fight, then he thought you had a secret boyfriend you weren’t telling him about. Regardless, he missed you and whenever he did see you, he always felt like you didn’t want to be there. You didn’t but, it was never because of him.

“I am having fun,” you lied. “It’s your birthday. Go hang out with people, I'll be fine.”

Chris placed a friendly kiss on your cheek as he made his way over to Nate. You started to regret even coming. Who were you kidding? You were a fucking buzzkill. You considered sneaking out and getting an Uber home but, that would have been really shitty of you.

“Y/n”, she shrieked as she came around the corner hand in hand with Matt. Your heart jumped into your throat as you did your best to match her enthusiasm. She pulled you into a hug, “Oh my god, it’s so great to see you. I'm so glad you could make it.”

The worst part was that she really meant it and your attempt to return the sentiment flopped. You caught a second of confusion flash across Matt’s face before it was replaced with a smile.

You crossed your arms across your chest as you said, “Happy Birthday, Matt. This party's awesome.”

Matt’s eyebrows shot up, “Don’t I get a hug?” he asked, confused.

As he pulled you in you couldn’t ignore how awkward you were being. You tried to relax but, before you could, the hug was long over.

You tried to pull your shit together, today wasn’t about you. Today was about three of your best friends and you’d do good to remember that.

“Let’s cut the cake,” Nick said as everyone gathered around the table. Chris draped an arm around your shoulders as he squeezed in between you and Nick.

“I’m just so grateful that you’re all here to celebrate with us,” Chris said.

“Me too,” Matt chimed in as Nick nodded in agreement.

As Matt and his girlfriend stood next to you, you could feel his eyes burning a hole in the side of your head. “Everyone get in for a photo before we cut it,” Nick said as he set up the camera on a tripod.

Matt moved in closer, placing his hand on the small of your back. What once would have given you butterflies made you feel sick at that moment.

As time passed ever so slowly, you could see your bestie and Nate engrossed in conversation. You were pretty sure something was going on between them and if you were going to wait for her, you would be here all night.

You sent her a text to let her know that you were going home, grabbed your bag, and rushed down the stairs. You felt awful not saying goodbye, but you were sure they’d understand.

As you reached for the door, Chris appeared at the top of the stairs. “Y/n,” he yelled over the music, “are you leaving?”

“Sorry, I couldn’t find you,” you lied as he made his way down to you.

“It was great seeing you,” he said, “I’ve missed hanging out,”

You nodded sheepishly as you pulled him into a hug. “I’m so glad you’re in my life,” he said. Your heart lurched in your chest. You knew what he meant. Whatever was going on, he was still going to be your friend.

You kissed his cheek before sliding out the door and making your way to the corner. Your Uber was 5 minutes away and you just wanted to get out of there.

As you stood under the street light wishing you stayed home in bed, you heard footsteps coming up behind you. You knew exactly who it was and you didn’t want to turn around.

“Y/n,” Matt said as he finally made it to where you were standing, “You’re leaving?”

You turned to face him, forcing a smile, “I’ve had a headache all day that I just can’t seem to shake,” you lied. Well, it was partly true.

He buried his hands deep in his pocket as he rocked back on his heels. You stood in awkward silence for what felt like an eternity.

“I miss you,” he blurted out. “I don’t know what I did but, can we fix it? ‘Cause I would really like to be your friend again.”

That was all that you wanted. You felt awful that you let your feelings get in the way of your friendship with Matt. The thought of third wheeling with him and his girlfriend made you sick but, wasn’t it better than not seeing him at all?

“We are friends,” you replied. A smile spread across his face as he pulled you into a hug. Less awkward than before but, still not quite the same.

It hurt to think that you couldn’t be with him in the way that you wanted but, you knew deep down that you couldn’t live without him. If that meant breaking your own heart just to keep him in your life, that is what you were prepared to do.