#2021 you were so good to me

[jazzy-tzw]

[quinn-pop]

“if it’s too bright i’ll be your shadow” (screaming and crying and exploding)

the new episode got me. little sad there was no confession so of course i had to draw them to make up for it

bonus stuff

[sarioh]

ethubs

shoutout to you and all the other ethubs warriors who have been here with me in the trenches since 2021. we were right about everything ever since the beginning of time but in the worst possible ways and no one can ever take that away from us . amen

[guardian-angle22]

The 126 + hobbies/interests | TK & sports + music (pt. 2)

[thedreadvampy]

My housemate is moving out in January

She told us this a week or two ago, when she sat down and, after sitting with us watching TV for over an hour, said "hey so I bought a house and I'm moving out. We agreed on 2 months notice so I won't move until the end of January."

The last time she talked in the immediate terms about buying a house was in 2021, when the sale she was working on fell though and she was unemployed so it was a "when I'm back in a position to look I'll start looking again." Since then I've occasionally asked her how she's doing on the house buying front and she's been like "oh I'm getting there financially" but hasn't mentioned anything concrete.

She didn't tell us she was looking at places. She didn't tell us she had put in an offer. She told us when the offer was finalised. A week AFTER she emailed the letting agent about getting out of her part of the lease. And, it increasingly feels like, only because the letting agent's response was that we had to agree to change the lease.

The letting agent's response (which our housemate obviously didn't copy us into; we had to follow up separately and they copied us into the email chain) also includes that when we change the lease, they're empowered to change the rent, quote, "no cap". Rent was already going up in January - there's no possibility of Sam and I paying her share of the rent.

The really fucking upsetting thing is we're not strangers. This isn't a casual "housemate we found on flatshare" thing. She and Sam have lived together literally their entire adult lives. Me and her have known each other well over a decade. I lived in her and Sam's flat when I was homeless. We were the first people she came out to as trans. We're not super close but I thought we were fucking friends. And she's literally gone out of her way to not talk to us about this for what must have been months while the sale completed - which means she's lied to my face at least once cause I've asked her about her finances in that time (cause she's in a job she hates that she only took to get the house money, so it's like. when we've been commiserating about work stuff I'm often asking 'are you almost free?'). she literally went out of her way to talk to the letting agents before talking to us about putting us in a situation where we could lose our fucking home.

And she keeps. trying. to pretend nothing's happened. Every time I've seen her since then she's not mentioned anything or apologised or anything, she just keeps chatting away and offering hugs and fistbumps like nothing's happened. Like we're still fucking friends.

All it would take for us to still be friends and to be happy for her would have been one fucking sentence in the groupchat like "hey, just put an offer in on a house" or "I'm looking at properties, just so you know, that might happen in the next few months". Like nobody begrudges her for buying a house! It's very cool for her! She's 31 she's worked really hard to get the money I would love to be happy for her! Unfortunately she decided avoiding conflict is more important than giving the people she fucking LIVES WITH (who btw fronted her a month on the rent here while she was unemployed and agreed to take on a larger proportion of the move-in cost back in 2021, if we're still holding ourselves to shit we said 2.5 years ago), so no, you are not entitled to our friendship or to going back to normal.

like if she'd been honest with us it would have been something to process but we'd have had time to figure out our next steps. instead she's left us in a position where we have to find a new roommate before she gives her one month notice, which means finding someone by the end of December, which oh look that's the middle of the fucking Christmas holidays. and she didn't tell us anything until the START of December, or copy us into her conversation with the letting agent, meaning we still don't know what the rent on that space will be so we aren't yet in a position to advertise it. Has she offered to help find a roommate? Has she fuck. Has she offered to help out by moving her move-out date? Nah, she's moving as soon as she gets the keys because, quote, "that means her finances won't have to change". SOUNDS LOVELY. NOT HAVING YOUR FINANCES SUDDENLY CHANGE. I THINK THAT SOUNDS LIKE A REALLY REASONABLE FUCKING GOAL.

Thirteen fucking years she's lived with Sam. Four fucking weeks over Christmas she's left us to figure out a way to not turbofuck our living situation. And she's got the fucking nerve to try and pretend we should be interacting like nothing's changed. Jesus Christ. What a fucking unhinged way to treat...anybody, honestly. never mind the friends-your-entire-adult-life part. literally cannot imagine a scenario in which I would buy a house without telling the people I lived with.

(haha actually this is what my parents divorced over so apparently it's not unusual. although at least my dad had the decency to tell the woman he shared finances with at the point he put in an offer not the point the fucking sale went through.)

Like we'll be fine. It's a huge city centre flat with decent rent and queer housemates, hopefully even when the rent goes up it'll be an easy sell in a city with a huge housing shortage and big queer community. We've got a couple of people interested already, sight unseen - worst case scenario we have to live with someone we don't get on with. And it's given Sam and me a push to look at our own finances and as of today, we've got a mortgage decision in principle and can start looking at flats in the area - mind, we'll be transparent upfront and tell any prospective housemates that yeah, we're looking to buy and move out in the next 6-12 months, and we'll tell them if we put an offer in, because we're decent fucking people who aren't going to spring that on someone out of the blue.

But it's been I think 2 weeks and I'm so fucking angry I could spit. It's such a fucking betrayal. And frankly you know selfishly like. I just had a breakup a couple of months ago, I'm in the middle of moving jobs, both me and Sam have a history of housing instability and this has been the first decent, stable, safe, not-mouldy not-freezing home I think any of us have had, and this is so fucking triggering and upscuttling I could just start biting. like I was talking to my friend about it last week and it's just like. Can I have One Fucking Thing of the three main tentpoles of survival - home, work, relationships - that are fucking stable right now? because shit has been In Flux lately. and at least the work and relationship stuff has changed because of my decisions. going through all that work to make myself short-term unstable to gain long-term stability has been really hard and draining and then just as I was reaching the crisis point with work stuff BOOM, IT'S HOUSING INSTABILITY WITH A STEEL CHAIR. fuck. seriously fuck this and fuck her. we're going to make something good come of it but what a deeply, unbelievably shitty thing to do.

[likesummerrainn]

AEW Collision | 06.15.24

[zynxsone]

WHY CAN'T I FIND ANY FANFICS ON TUMBLR THAT ISN'T PURE SMUT ANYMORE. LIKE GIVE ME FLUFF, ANGST, AND MOST OF ALL: PLOT😭🙏🙏🙏

[zukkaoru]

safe & sound - taylor swift || jujutsu kaisen

[id in alt text]

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: March 27

"Long Time Gone" by The Chicks

[akkivee]

i saw a suggestion that the alt outfits signify a timeskip and became possessed lmao

[pochapal]

in the Horrors bonanza year that has been 2024 nobody expected the oldest and dearest Horrors of all (covid horrors) to make a third act comeback

[camellia-thea]

initially this post had some commentary about interests right now. and then it turned into a ramble about personal healing in the tags. so the interest post is going separately.

[alvin-draper]

Cabaret at the Kit Kat Club 25.06.24

Tonight I was lucky enough to go see Cabaret in the West End for a second time - a friend had a spare ticket going. Last time I went Callum Scott Harris was Emcee and two delightful but less memorable people played Sally and Cliff. No shade to them but Harris stole the whole show.

The current main cast - Layton Williams, Rhea Norwood and Michael Ahomka-Lindsay seem more balanced. By which I mean Norwood and Ahomka-Lindsay were incredible and Williams served his purpose just fine.

The Emcee felt more like backdrop than like an active force (as he has been with other actors in the role); several of his big joke moments had been cut back (notably the joke with the fake penis. I do not know why this is what I remember from my first watch). The Emcee also comes off differently as a POC - they've made Williams look as pale as possible, and the twist on it is that usually the Emcee in this production is entirely complicit and corrupted, but Williams came off at the very end as another man in denial of the world changing around them. It works with the show, but the interpretation is different to others in this production, so was not expecting it. He still is very much the soul of Berlin throughout, and the still incredible costumes reflect that.

The entire rest of the cast was stunning, no spots on them. I loved the actors for Victor and Bobby, Herr Mann was hilarious, Fraulein Kost is always a stand out hit. I feel like she doesn't get enough love from reviews but her bigger role in this production is excellent. Hits home the 'these people are my friends and neighbours' bit. Herr Schultz was divine, but I generally feel this way. He's such a brilliant character. And his denial that the Nazis will come to power works so well.

So many little details in this production, like Norwood really mixing a raw egg and sauce and downing it on stage, make it stand out. Norwood's Sally was incredible, and very vivacious. Life in her till the last. Her anger and frustration was palpable. Ahomka-Lindsay's Cliff was also superb - the friendly American to the T. I saw him as Jack Kelly last year, and after this I feel safe to say he'll keep climbing. Incredible performance, I'm a particular fan of how you can see the very real change in him as the reality of the situation in Germany sets in. He's the only character who really feels the urgency of it, and the rest of them are still desperately clinging to their lives.

What Would You Do hit especially hard in this production for me - I found that Sally Ann Triplett as Fraulein Scheider was brilliant. Her voice as she calls out Cliff, her 'brave young friend' - I've never felt her side of it as much as I did here. She was an incredible consistent thread throughout. I no doubt have more thoughts, but these are the preliminaries before I sleep and forget most of the whole thing!

[aloysarrow]

I wish GI wasn't trying to push people (kinda specifically longer players) away from the game, like damn. I really hope new players are watching closely and not just deciding "there are haters" or "complainers." Some of the things, like the age old where's the end-of-game road map, have been actual game needs that haven't been addressed for years. Game needs, guys. Idk, if you still call some people haters/complainers, then I'm probably gonna call you a bootlicker lol

[folkinsomnia]

screaming myself hoarse til I pass out we were together during a very tumultuous time in our lives I will always have your back and be curious about you about your career your whereabouts!!!

[thedreadvampy]

everything around this housing shit basically boils down to: what I said would be fine 2+ years ago isn't necessarily what's fine now