la flor y la muerte rant review because what was this plot structure
guys I was actually excited about this one im so sad
this book has no business being 640 pages with not one, but TWO time skips. the first one is 6 months, the second one FIVE YEARS
this should have been split into 3 books of their own so we could get properly fleshed out characters *and* relationships, because you keep telling me you are friends with this person or that you are in love with this other one and like ????? i mean I'll have to buy it, even if you haven't spoken on page to the first one and has had a single conversation with the other one
also no one bought into the enemies to friends to lovers to enemies to lovers, because I don't know this people. I can't feel sorry for them or their relationship. I do not believe they haven't gotten over the other in five years after the 5? conversations they had. like 🧍
the only relationship I liked was asha and aden, even if their friendship gets obscured by their own love interests
back to the plot structure because what the hell was going on. so.
besties start studying into this highly demanding academy to become the leaders of their world when they graduate (which takes 3 years) and then there's this trial 6 months after they begin to... actually I have no idea what the trial was for apart from getting points(? but then that doesnt matter anyways because we don't know anything about the other teams anyways?
but that was not my first point. my first point was that these six months they are training and like getting together as a group and bonding to gO OUT INTO A CAPTURE THE FLAG NO RULES IN OUTTER SPACE just get skipped. we get the first like 3 days of class and then 6 months have passed we are all besties now. hello ????? girl it's the first time this character's name is on page and you are telling me you trust this person with your LIFE in OUTTER SPACE ?????
I wanted those six months. I wanted to see them get close to each other, and the group dynamics, and how they trained. but nope. 6 months later we are leaving to go into this trial where everyone else is going to try to kill our group because we are the best team. and like. there's no tension at all???? you know one of the group is going to die but it's probably one of the characters that hasn't really talked yet so who cares. (not me)
the trial was okay I guess. it was there. some convos with the main couples which I also don't care about so. okay
(they win the trial ofc) (not that it matters at all)
then they go in ONE mission. a couple gets together (good for them I guess) (this mission lasts three months apparently but we get like 2 chapters for each pov character and that all happens like the first week they are there) then they go back home and there's a party! and for plot reasons I'm too tired to explain half the group has to run away into space because they are wanted traitors now (two characters decide to join the actual traitors for reasons. idk I don't know these people I can't even remember who is who)
but yeah now it's 5 years later and the couple that's not together is so fucking annoying. it's been 5 years superalo tía. anyways they all meet again, they overthrow a government with the help of some rebels, the end (this is about 150 pages long and I kid you not 70% it's the other couple getting together) (they succeed in overthrowing the gov and like good for them but also? kinda easy???? it doesn't feel earned. we know nothing of the rebels they are now working with. I'm just 🧍🧍🧍)
so yeah, it wasnt good
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Me: I shouldn't disturb Neil Gaiman. I shouldn't send an ask unless I really have no way of getting the information otherwise. I'll check old interviews and all the articles that vaguely mention the subject. Of course it goes without saying that I'll read though the FAQ in its entirety. Only then, will I send an ask. However, I'd be very polite and praise his work, as anyone would. I'd also keep it short, because I don't want to waste his time. But I'd keep it very very respectful. I'd be sending a message to a very talented, amazing author that deals with god knows how many like me. Or I'd just stay in the dark and not send him an ask. Yeah, I'll do that.
My Dash:
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I was shelving the books by the first letter of the first sentence. - Good Omens, 2x02
"It was a nice day. All the days had been nice. There had been rather more than seven of them so far, and rain hadn't been invented yet. But clouds massing east of Eden suggested that the first thunderstorm was on its way, and it was going to be a big one." - Good Omens by Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman
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i cant get over the ball being so CLEARLY all for crowley i can't get over aziraphale trying to woo him with a WHOLE FUCKING BALL because that's what he knows that's what romance IS for him because he's been wanting to dance with crowley ever since dancing was invented and he's so stuck in time with the way he dresses and talks and he still thinks a dance is the high of romance AND HE MADE A WHOLE ENTIRE FUCKING BALL FOR CROWLEY JUST SO HE COULD DANCE WITH HIM like now it's so fucking obvious he gave away his BOOKS without a second thought and it was all for crowley he organised a whole JANE AUSTEN THEME BALL just so he could have an excuse to finally dance with the love of his life and i can't get over this i'm shaking my fists and pacing up and down he did not give a single fuck about anything other than dancing with crowley and HE BARELY TOUCHED OTHER PEOPLE'S HANDS WHILE HIS WHOLE FUCKING PALM WAS PRESSED TO CROWLEY'S AND i need to lie down
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where is my wife
Amazon review on this Morrow edition of "Good Omens" by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett I found this morning that left me laughing in tears right from the title.
... Actually, in hindsight, having seen the ineffable divorce™️ of Season 2, the fact that the only thing left on the cover is his glass of wine makes me so sad. It's like Crowley, having now been through all that, has left his glass of wine in the bookshop and is refusing to come back since Aziraphale is gone. Muriel doesn't really want to touch what Crowley left in the hopes he will be back soon and maybe still want his glass of "whine", whatever that is. He seemed sad last time they saw him, so that's probably what they meant by "whine".
.... Wait a minute though, did Aziraphale write this review?!? "WHERE IS MY WIFE?" ?!?!?
Okay it's time to tag him, this has gone off the rails and so have I. @neil-gaiman please explain. Thank you. (Love your work, actually. But also... What is going on here.)
Update, not even 10 hours after I originally posted this: Neil himself liked the post. I'm freaking out a normal amount about it.
PS: here's a lil thank you post for all the notes I'm getting, holy hell!!!
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