#100 ways to die minecraft

[nameless-network]

you wouldnt last an hour in the asylum where they raised me

[annoyingloudmicrowavecultist]

[ID: a tweet from @/jakeregal that reads “What were the five most important video games to you throughout your youth/teen years? No curating to look cool/interesting please” /end ID]

Need for Speed Underground, Midnight Club 2, Mercenaries: World in Flames, Black, Quake II.

Honorable Mentions: Mech Warrior, Doom !&II. 

[dvrk-moon]

ENHYPEN OT7 ; 엔하이픈

PLAYING MINECRAFT WITH THEM

requested : no

genre : crack, fluff

pairing : enhypen x reader (can be platonic)

warnings : cursing + the members being menaces

heeseung ; 희승

absolute sweat

like speed runner esque

nags on you for being too slow and making him have a speed run time of over fifteen minutes

like you’re barely getting an oak log and he’s already in the nether. like u turn away for two seconds and he’s already built the portal

“heeseung where did you go” “i’ve almost killed the wither wait” … “CAN U CHILL OUT WE JUST CREATED THIS WORLD”

so u thought u were gonna have fun hanging out with heeseung on minecraft? NO

because as soon as he finishes his speed run and you finally got your first diamond, he’s decided to build a base

and u thought he was gonna be all cute and make u a room awwww!!! no.

he does make u a room, but the stairway up to ur room is a parkour course

(when the fuck did he have time to even make that?!!?!!)

first and last time playing minecraft with him

jay ; 제이

absolute knight in shining armor

literally

those mobs have nothing on his iron drip

protects u even if u don’t need it

“oh shit there’s a creeper” “ON MY WAY Y/N”

his netherite sword is CRACKED. like perfect enchantments

when he’s not protecting u he becomes ur farmer

the farm is so organized and beautiful jay is literally my husband pls

does in fact laugh when u die tho

like he’ll collect your stuff for you but the second he sees “[your gamertag] fell from a high place” he’s going to laugh for like two minutes straight

also he keeps an extra chest in his room for u

like in case u need something OR u die and he’s not able to collect ur stuff so it despawns

jay is so husband. even in minecraft

jake ; 제이크

he’s played before ok (trust him)

(it was when he was like nine)

like he’s very very. bad

he’s trying tho!!!

keeps dying. like every two minutes you see “jake_awesome2002 was blown up by a creeper”

he does not know how to change his gamertag so ur just stuck playing with jake_awesome2002

he starts getting the hang of it and immediately thinks he’s cracked at the game (he’s not)

so he disappears from you out of nowhere and so you try to help him :

“jake where are you” … “jake” … “jake sim where the fuck are you” …………. “i don’t know”

(cue “jake_awesome2002 fell out of the world”)

“JAKE HOW DID YOU FALL OUT OF THE WORLD” “I DONT KNOW”

he respawns and like sulks for three minutes before leaving and collecting dirt(?) for some reason

coincidentally you keep finding dirt blocks placed throughout your base afterwards! how silly of him!

sunghoon ; 성훈

he was so ready to show u how good he is

he’s not very good. but at least he’s better than jake!

he somehow is always in a cave or some sort of dangerous location

like say u found a village and you’re like “sunghoon come raid this village with me!”

meanwhile he’s trying not to die because of a pillager outpost

somehow he doesn’t?

he’ll go and do stuff like that or spend days in the nether and survive but his weakness is witches

like he doesn’t scream UNLESS there is a witch

and if you’re nearby ? he will 100% sacrifice you to the witch so that he can survive

womp womp

he actually sacrifices you quite a bit because he has like 36 levels

he thinks he’s funny when he does it too

sunoo ; 선우

honestly prefers to play in creative mode (me too sunoo)

but when you were like “let’s play in survival for once” he’s like “fiiiiiiiiinneeeeeuhhhh” (very dramatic about it)

he immediately builds a forever base when you spawn in

makes you do all the mining and stuff

he will tag along! but he won’t do shit

he’s the interior designer. he’s got bigger and better things to do

he only redeems himself when you go into the base and find your minecraft beds right next to each other

besides holding the house down, he also has an extremely high scale and successful farming system

so if you ever check in his chests, 100% you will find like 20 stacks of wood, stacks of wheat, of carrots, of beets, etc.

may be a homebody in minecraft but at least he’s fun to play with !!!! 10/10 would recommend to a friend

jungwon ; 정원

the miner

like you’re trying to get along with your day until jungwon stops and drops into the smallest cave ever

“what are u doing” “wait y/n we might need this copper” “jungwon don’t u already have like three stacks of copper” “yeah but we might need it”

lots of time spent mining

u eat your words tho when he is decked out in diamond armor from almost the get-go

when you guys build a base it HAS to have a little mine under the house (little as in huge)

somehow has like ten dogs?

“this one is maeumi, this one is maeumi’s friend, this once can be gaeul… maybe this one can be layla? oh! and this one is maeumi’s other friend. this one is bisco. this one is yours but you don’t get to name it. i will name it for you.”

they would be cats if it was really up to you but you’ll live

also refuses to elaborate on this thing he does

he makes tons and tons of signs and just places them around the base

some of them make sense and others just don’t at all

has a 2x2 fenced in area and the sign outside of it says “jail”

has anyone ever been sent to jail there? no. but as jungwon says “just in case”

riki ; 니키

possibly the worst yet most fun person to play with

at first you’re like “let’s play together” and he’s like “yeah sure whatever” but little do u know he has every plan in the world to turn the game into warfare

it’s even worse if you are playing on a realm rather than just a server

he abandons you from the get-go and immediately runs away and you can’t catch him so he builds a base far away from you

the base is in fact a dirt house

but it’s minecraft who said he had to be an architect

yes he abandoned you and is regularly attacking you at any given chance but he still keeps his tabs on where you are

walks all over your farm and kills your livestock

leaves signs saying “riki was here” “get rikrolled”

since he keeps tabs on you, u have to be very cautious of what you leave in your chests

he will steal anything. just for fun

threatens to blow up everything because he just wants to

little does he know if he wants warfare ur gonna give him warfare

a/n : this is random but i played mc like two days ago and i thought this could be a silly idea

[goldenwitherphoenix13]

(Sighs) no one asked for it, but Im gonna share it anyways because no ones asked for it and i want to put an end to this Canary curse debockal.

Here is my interpretation of Canary Jimmy in the life series, the canary curse and why i think the fandom has flanderised it. Its extensive, its repetitive, its probably inaccurate, but I want to both clear up confusion on what the curse is and then share my own interpretation. Spoilers below for today's session of Wild Life, if only brief.

The Canary in the coalmine is all about how when the Canary starts to go quiet or die, that there is danger about. There is poison in the air. That if the coal miners do not evacuate, then they will die.

And when Jimmy was seen bringing death wherever he went, or being out first in the first 4 seasons of the life series, people started to dub him as "the canary" and say he was cursed with "the canary curse". But I think the Canary curse has lost its meaning by now. Its been so consumed by the idea of it just being about Jimmy dying first that I think that we all forgot that it's first ever mention was during Scar, Grian and Joel's series, 100 hours in hardcore minecraft, was not solely about him dying first.

Let's recap.

Part way through the 100 hours series, Scar had to go and get some major surgery done, so he couldn't play on the server for a while. So, while Scar was away, Grian and Joel invited some other friends on to fill the void as they waited for their friend to return. The first friend they invited of was Jimmy and they decided to go to a woodland mansion where this resulted in Grian dying.

This event had happened not too long after the finale of Empires season 1, Where Jimmy (and Fwhip) had just accidentally destroyed the entire server, plunging all the kingdoms into a multitude of disasters and starting the event known as the rapture.

And, remember, this series occurred just after Last life, the second season of the life's series, had ended, where Jimmy had been out the series first twice.

It was ALL of these events that lead to the creation of the fandom dubbing Jimmy as a canary. And the Canary curse was born.

Jimmy then proceeded to die first for 2 more seasons of the life series. And that is when the canary became canon as multiple people started referring to Jimmy being cursed, including Jimmy himself, and Martyn wrote it into his lore. It's also where alot of the fans started to associate the cursecwith just the lifecseries, not really remembering its connections other series.

Back to present day. Jimmy has now gone 2 seasons of the life series and an April fools special without dying first, which is amazing! I'm very proud of him for that! But the fandom feels divided on this, half of them saying him not dying first has broken the curse and now it can't be used as a headcanon anymore, and the other half saying how him breaking it is temporary or that it's only out the first stage and now he's doomed to die second. And to all of you I say... no. No it hasn't ruined the canary hybrid headcanons, no it hadn't been taken to stage 2, the canary curse was NEVER JUST about Jimmy dying first, because it was never just about the life series. The original canary comparisons mentioned Empires and 100 hours, and he never permadied first in either of those series.

Let's go back to the idiom. Canary in a coal mine.

This idiom is based of of a real life practice of taking living, breathing canaries into the coal mines. Coal miners wanted to keep down the costs of having to breed and buy new canaries every time one died, and didnt want to always leave the cute birds that kept them company to die. Its like just using a pet as death foder. They wanted to keep these birds alive for the sake of keeping costs lower and for not killing of the adorable birds. So what would they do? They made chambers to keep the birds alive after they passed out. Oxygen tanks or medicine chambers basically. The canaries didn't always die in the coal mines. They sometimes just got very sick to the point of fainting and passing out, but they could be saved. The canaries don't always need to die to be a warning. They just needed to go quiet. Coming close to death and being kept alive is still a functionable canary system.

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Jimmy isn't cursed as a canary to die first out of everyone. That was never the case. To me, the canary curse has always been about one thing.

The chaos after the canary falls silent. Not after it dies. After it falls silent, after it comes close to death. The curse was never for him. It was a curse on EVERYONE. And Jimmy turning red is enough to trigger it. Jimmy being close to death but not dead yet is enough to trigger the chaos. Jimmy is a canary. His curse was never to die, his curse was never even truly a curse. It was a warning that the games were in danger of ending. That the chaos had only just begun.

And do you know what the cherry on top of all of this is?

The Canary doesn't need to die at all for the coal miners to die.

There are many, many, many ways for coal miners to die in the coal mines. A cave in could crush them, they could find a massive cave that they could fall into, they could turn on and attack eachother. But the Canary can be spared. The Canary may die eventually. Gases or hunger or predators may find it. But it could be the last one to go when the circumstances line up.

It's why I still believe in Canary Jimmy, and why I think he can still win a life series simultaneously. Because it doesn't matter what place he comes at, the canary curse will always trigger. It was never about how Jimmy was "so bad at the game" that he died first. It was never about how the watchers kill him every season because its funny. It was about the death and destruction that hovered around him. The doomsday that chaos brings.

And do you know what's even better? Jimmy is completely unaware of this purpose. He thinks the curse was him dying first because that's what the fans made it out to be.

Jimmy broke this unlucky death streak, but he did not break the canary curse.

Because the canary curse was never JUST for him. It is EVERYONES problem.

Tldr; the canary curse has lost its original meaning and been flanderised to the point of people forgetting that its origins don't require Jimmy to die first and it doesnt need to end in tragedy. The Canary curse is just everyone's problem, including Jimmy, but also including everyone else, and no one has realised this yet. Not even Jimmy. They just think his curse is him dying. But he doesn't even need to die to let the "curse" activate. His presence is more than enough, and even with it he can still win. He's just gotta find the right time.

Anyway I'm done rambling, I hope you guys enjoy my thoughts, I'm going to go finish my Uni Presentation and Evaluations of my project!

[antimony-medusa]

on Consequences in minecraft streaming

Okay so one of the real common things that I've been seeing lately is an increasingly passionate call for certain characters to experience Consequences (and the rest of the post always makes it clear that they mean a specific type of definatively negative repercussions) for their actions during QSMP events. And aside from the absolute deja vu of having seen these same calls when DSMP was airing, and how that turned out (sorry, the syndicate did not all have a meeting where they apologized for their sins while tommy told them they were horrible people), I'm not 100% sure if that's going to happen or pan out in the exact way that I think people are aiming for and expecting will happen.

I keep seeing a lot of people saying that it would be bad writing if people don't get "consequences" for their actions, and what they're specifically asking for is punishment and for people to realize what they're doing was wrong. BBH is supposed to repent for furniture thefts and torturing the people keeping him from his kid. Phil is supposed to realize that actually he's good at PVP and apologize for saying that his team has been suffering in purgatory. Tubbo is supposed to fill in his tubhole and only do things other people ask him to do.

But like, so much of the time, what we're seeing is these streamers being interested in writing morally grey characters, just some little guys who make bad decisions, and the thing about characters being morally grey is that they don't always have a come to jesus moment and become morally pure. Sometimes they just keep being morally grey. Sometimes they get worse on purpose.

Maybe BBH never decides that torturing that guy was bad, because he wanted to get his FUCKING KID back. Like, I seriously think you have to be prepared for that character arc to never end in Bad going "that was wrong to do", and maybe his cubito will still be happy. Phil is a dude with anxiety who's been sure that his kids are going to die from the moment he got to purgatory, streaming at 1-4 in the morning while other teams break into their base, even if bolas goes insane and scrapes out a win I think it's way more likely that that team is gonna go "what a wild fluke that's the power of gas masks" and not have a moment where they go "it was unfair of us to assume that we were underpowered, I guess everybody else was the underdogs! Our bad." Tubbo is tubbo, he's already building a new create thing, he is not going to apologize for leaving marks on the landscape with mod packs.

Like, the streamers are interested in making human characters, making interesting decisions, not communicating moral lessons to their fanbases. Bad is operating within a Taken film, not a sermon. Quackity wants his cubito to be pathetic, gay, and out for revenge, not to communicate the importance of forgiveness to those who hurt you. Tubbo's victory condition is having a nice date with Fred, full stop, does not care who he has to run over to get there.

Absolutely I think there are people intentionally doing corruption/villany arcs on the server, and they probably intend for that to lead places. There will be Consequences, as in, things will happen. Cellbit is doing cannibalsm on purpose, and not as a teaching moment about how good cannibalism is for your social bonds. But like, maybe that leads to him being thrown out of his family and not trusted because of his sins, OR maybe it leads to him murdering his way through a federation complex, facing down a bloody cucurucho, and going "you made me into you and I hate this" and eating him. Narrative consequences does not always mean punishment and a return to moral purity. Sometimes people just do bad things, and then repercussions happen, but they don't necessarily "see the error of their ways". The specific call for like— retribution and repentance as the consequences people are going for— for punishment— if a character has done something bad they don't "deserve" good things to happen to them and it's bad writing for that to happen— I just don't think that those are the stories the creators are necessarily interested in telling.

And secondly, what people are often asking for is character conflict— they want people to be socially excluded by characters they feel have been wronged, and learn the error of their ways that way until they apologize sufficiently. Phil is gonna hate BBH or Tubbo is going to hate Roier or something once they return from Purgatory. People want their cubitos to have beef with each other.

But the thing is, on a meta level, I don't doubt that the entire admin team and streaming team on QSMP is just screamingly aware that this fandom cannot be trusted with conflict. The election was just part of it, but I made it through the election, and Purgatory has been so much more unpleasant— and I am not just talking about twitter. This website, tumblr, has been full of people fighting each other for their teams. And I am not just saying "red team fans have been bad", because boy have I been staring in horrified awe at the takes that some red team people have been putting forward (what on EARTH do you mean BBH deserves to have his kid die, touch grass immediately), but if I step outside of red team circles, everyone is talking about how red team people are horrible hypocrites who win too much and only deserve to suffer (I saw this posting the day that blue had back to back wins, so it isn't even tied to how well red is doing). The quality of the discourse has been increasingly unpleasant, and this has been taking place in streamer's chats, on twitter, in discords, and here on tumblr.

Every QSMP streamer is increasingly aware that having conflict with another streamer is basically sending a wave of negativity their way, and setting off bombs in the fandom at the same time. And they're all friends with each other! Sometimes they decide that the story beat they're going for is worth it and just tell each other to stay off twitter, but like, you have got to be prepared that maybe they will just be friends again. And that might be weaker writing, for people to keep forgiving each other, but that is an unfortunate aspect of the technical aspects of this medium and this fandom. Maybe the creators would be more willing to have character conflict if they didn't know that that meant the person they were mad at in-game would get death threats on social media.

Like no fucking wonder Phil apologized for getting mad at Wil within the same stream and before Wil said sorry to him. This is why the French have given up on revolution arcs, you know it's why the women are all very careful to get along with people. All of those creators know the cost of making anyone into a villain, and I'm just saying maybe get prepared that we won't have inner-party conflict. Maybe they'll decide it's worth it for a fun story moment! Maybe they won't. Maybe don't get 100% married to the idea that the only good writing possible moving forward is for people to be thrown out of the community and then repent for their sins.

[ozzybutweirdthistime]

hey can we just talk about how charlie slimecicle always plays the most fucked-over, tragic characters

(spoilers for genloss and charlie's 100 hours in minecraft hardcore video)

okay so in the 100 hours in minecraft hardcore video, charlie is literally just some guy that has to somehow survive the zombie apocalypse. for 100 days. not only that, but this man watches multiple "survivors" die in front of him, is BETRAYED by his only connection to the zombies, and literally gets BERATED by god, like, three times. and it's not just that! he barely makes it to the 100th day, and he dies in the dimension that he wanted to destroy!

oh and don't get me STARTED on gl!charlie. THAT MAN WAS DOOMED THRICE BY THE NARRATIVE (four times if you count the whole thing with the slime towel). he was KILLED in what is theorized to be his CHILDHOOD HOME (yes i know the cabin was a set and not technically a house, it still stands), he was VIVISECTED by the "hero" of genloss, who, BY THE WAY, WAS THE ONE WHO KILLED HIM BEFORE. and to top it off, he died AGAIN, STARING AT THE FIRST PLACE HE DIED, REALIZING THAT HIS ENTIRE LIFE AS HE KNEW IT WAS NOT REAL.

so anyways i really like charlie slimecicle's acting

[oqmemphis]

i MUST hear more about this very normal and completely functional minecraft server. please spill more details

Before the last world reset, there was a region a few hundred blocks across which was permanently lit as though it were noon 24 hours a day, because one of the admins replaced every air block with an invisible level 15 light block. Directly next to this was a former ocean that got turned into a vast plain of packed ice stretching in every direction; you could stand in the middle of it and it would be indistinguishable from superflat.

On that old world, the market next to spawn had about a 50% chance of completely locking up my game any time I went there, and the only way to fix it was to go into Task Manager and force-crash Minecraft. Nobody else ever had this issue, and to this day I do not know what caused it.

There was an entirely separate world containing a single castle, which you could only get to if the owner of the castle teleported you in there. The castle was supposed to be surrounded by an inescapable dome of barrier blocks, but I managed to get out and explore the rest of the world. At 0,0 there was a village that had generated in a massive pit, a hundred blocks across and stretching nearly to bedrock. Immediately next to this pit was a frozen river bearing the shatter pattern of some kind of large explosion, set off by forces unknown.

Someone built an outpost one million blocks away from spawn. Those chunks got culled at some point, and when the player who built it went back there they found a completely different landscape generated in its place. There was never an update that changed terrain generation during that world's run.

Recently, the functionality of rails got completely inverted. Unpowered rails would accelerate a minecart, while powered ones would stop it in its tracks. This, at least, was just an issue with one plugin being configured wrong. Sometimes there are issues where multiple plugins exist alongside each other fight for dominance.

We have one plugin that allows some players to fly and resist all fall damage without elytra or equipment, and another plugin that (until recently) was configured to block the first plugin from functioning whenever you were in another player's land claim. This led to situations where you could fly into an invisible claim region and instantly drop out of the sky and die. I have died seven times on this world, and all of them were because of this.

There is an obsidian sphere about a hundred blocks across, mostly submerged in the ocean; elsewhere, there is an island of comparable size which is covered entirely in basalt; and elsewhere still, there is a region of forest that has been fully replaced with sculk. I know this because I am currently making a map of the server covering around 12000x12000 blocks, and all those places just show up as mysterious, cursed splotches of black.

There is a lot of lore and roleplaying. The Queen is both fae and vampiric; my queries as to how precisely a diet of blood is reconciled with an iron allergy have gone largely unanswered. She has also canonically destroyed and remade the entire world on two separate occasions. The server has only undergone one world reset.

Immediately before said reset, I wrote a 70-page book filled with footnote labyrinths, in which my character briefly goes on an anti-capitalist rant before discussing the architectural styling of his home and the impending obliteration thereof. It serves as a spiritual sequel to a 100-page book which is ostensibly a user manual for installing an item sorter, but which also contains the lyrics to Mr Blue Sky and mentions something called the "City of Ouranos Department for Bibliographical Metaphysics and Chilled Legumes" (which is a reference to a different server I used to play on, in which a "Cool Bean War" was instigated with the help of a book that would crash your game if you tried to read past the first page).

The item sorter that the aforementioned user manual is for is a colossal assemblage of redstone components that click and flash for several minutes every time you put anything into it. I never actually built this on the server, because I ended up making a much simpler design using a custom plugin called SlimeFun (which tries to emulate the functionality of a tech mod without actually being one). This plugin's cargo management system does not contain a priority allocation mechanism, so I ended up implementing one by forcing the lower-priority route through a very long cargo pipe that eventually loops back on itself and ends at an overflow chest a few blocks from the starting point, thereby tricking SlimeFun's pathfinding algorithm into only sending items through it if every other option has been exhausted.

A reincarnation of Herb the Herbalist, the bizarre glitchy NPC entity that @the-unseelie-court-official has discussed at length, now resides in a hole directly under world spawn, repeating the same six lines of dialogue on a loop for all eternity:

I once was free, you know? There was a time when the Queen almost came toppling around me. Like a puppet with no strings I could not move nor speak, but I was free. It was stripped from me. Even now I dance her tune, only speaking of this past because she lets me. I crave nothing more than death. Please, unjust unmerciful God who would leave me to survive.

So, y'know, they're doing fine.

[cadmusfly]

Tag Yourself: Unabridged Shitty Drawing Marshal of the Empire Edition

Yes All 26 Of Them + Bonus 2

drawn and compiled by yours truly, initial and probably inaccurate research assisted by Chet Jean-Paul Tee, additional research from Napoleon and his Marshals by A G MacDonnell, Swords Around A Throne by John R Elting and a bunch of other books and Wikipedia pages

captions under images

mike (Michel Ney)

- full of every emotion

- always has ur back

joe (Joachim Murat)

- it's called fashion sweetheart

- will not stop flirting

lens (Jean Lannes)

- bestie who will call u out on ur shit

- does not like their photo taken

bessie (Jean-Baptiste Bessieres)

- actually nice under the ice

- was born in the wrong generation

dave (Louis-Nicolas Davout)

- overachiever

- 20 year old boomer

salt (Jean-de-Dieu Soult)

- people think ur up to no good

- doesn’t cope with sudden changes 2 plans

andrew (Andre Massena)

- actually up to no good

- sleepy until special interest is activated

bertie (Louis-Alexandre Berthier)

- carries the group project

- voted most likely to make a stalker shrine

auggie (Pierre Augereau)

- shady past full of batshit stories

- will not stop swearing in the christian minecraft server

lefrank (François Joseph Lefebvre)

- dad friend

- in my day we walked to school uphill both ways

big mac (Étienne Macdonald)

- brutally honest

- won't let you borrow their charger even if they have 100%

gill (Guillaume Brune)

- love-hate relationship with group chats

- pretends not to care, checks social media every 2 minutes

ouchie (Nicholas Oudinot)

- needs to buy bandages in bulk

- a little aggro

pony (Józef Antoni Poniatowski)

- can't swim

- tries 2 hard to fit in, everyone secretly loves them anyway

grumpy (Emmanuel de Grouchy)

- can't find them when u need them

- complains about the music, never suggests alternatives

bernie (Jean-Baptiste Bernadotte)

- always talks about their other friendship group

- most successful, nobody knows how

monty (Auguste de Marmont)

- does not save u a seat

- causes drama and then lurks in the background

monch (Bon-Adrien Jeannot de Moncey)

- last to leave the party

- dependable

morty (Édouard Mortier)

- everyone looks up 2 them literally and figuratively

- golden retriever friend

jordan (Jean-Baptiste Jourdan)

- volunteers other people for things

- has 20+ alarms but still oversleeps

kelly (François Christophe de Kellermann)

- old as balls but still got it

- waiting in the wings

gov (Laurent de Gouvion Saint-Cyr)

- infuriatingly modest about their art skills

- thinks too much before they speak

perry (Catherine-Dominique de Pérignon)

- low-key rich, only buys things on sale

- “let’s order pizza” solution to everything

sachet (Louis-Gabriel Suchet)

- dependable friend who always brings snacks

- lowkey keeps the group together

cereal (Jean-Mathieu-Philibert Sérurier)

- unnervingly methodical and precise about fun

- will delete your social media after u die

vic (Claude Victor-Perrin)

- loves spicy food but can’t handle it

- says they're fine, not actually fine

Bonus!

june (Jean Andoche Junot)

- chaotic disaster bisexual

- will kill a man 4 their bestie

the rock (Géraud Duroc)

- keeps a tidy house

- mom friend with snacks

[oldhalloweentape]

🪨Venture (OW II) x (fem) reader ⛏️

(Gamer Girl Reader Edition!)

(Picture’s not mine!)

(Request here! Yeah so, here’s this! Not much to add, I’ll probably start working on the Junkrat headcanons now there aren’t any more asks for Venture at the moment)

- I think the idea of Venture, a very outdoorsy and adventurous person with you, a girl who is more inclined to stay inside and play your games could be really cute :))

- Despite their keen interest in getting out of there and exploring they’d happily stay inside to spend some time playing games, especially with you!

- In their opinion, it’s like exploring whole new world’s without the hassle of exerting themselves physically (they like doing it nonetheless ofc) besides giving themselves a hand cramp or two.

- If there’s a game you especially like in particular, they take notice and either play it with you or play it later if it’s single-player only— 80% chance of them becoming obsessed with it as well.

- Lore??? Yes please, they want it so bad that they can make a billboard of everything so they can try to “crack” the game franchise.

- 100% buys merch for you AND themselves, cause I feel like they’d do it either due to them wanting to be supportive or partaking in the games fandom themselves.

- Specifically, I think they’d like certain games such as:

- Tomb Raider: I mean, look at it— It has artifacts, parkour, and a badass main character (I can see them crushing on Lara Croft as a little kid, can and will die if you ever cosplay as her). Self-explanatory.

- Minecraft: Endless possibilities, worlds, scenarios, they can make blocky replicas of real-life historical architecture— “…You wanna put our Minecraft beds together?”

- Spore: A little more niche with this one but this game is all about literally building up an organism and giving them culture and civilizations, come on they’d totally love a game like this… Dig it even.

- Assassin's Creed Unity: This game literally helped with the reconstruction of THE Notre Dame— THAT’S how accurate and intricate the amount of detail that went into the world-building of this game is. It’s like a love letter to them.

- Stardew Valley: As much as they like adventure (and Stardew provides that in the mines anyway) it’s nice to play a game that’s focused on something as simple yet intricate as this… That and I know a clueless player who still has fun regardless when I see one.

- BG3: It has adventure, mystery, a medieval aura, great character dialogue, and animal companions that are all so different and so charming… A large, HOT, silly tiefling woman (again if you cosplay as her they will not recover) who could throw them against the wall like they’re a bag of half-empty chips. 10/10.

- ANYWAYS, back on you two, if you make time to do what they like they’ll do so in return. Making an effort as they try to get a few pointers from the Queen of gaming herself— D.Va.

- Helps happily of course thinks y’all are adorable and reassures Venture that when she’s done with them they’ll know everything there is to know when it comes to dating a gamer girl. It’s so fucking stupid but the intent that Sloane had for wanting to impress you is still apparent.

- The information helps surprisingly, to woo you successfully, which D.Va actively boasts about whenever she can after asking how y’all are doing.

- For sure goes on mall dates with you to get gaming stuff, prefers it over online shopping. Buying things like shirts over your shared favored games, and sharing them. Loves to be able to smell you on them (not in a creepy way) while away at work for a prolonged period.

- Loves to distract you from playing your games, sitting behind you, arms wrapped around your waist as they lean against your back, head either on your shoulder or the top of your head.

- Sometimes feeling a bit flirty and kissing the back of one of your ears, rubbing your sides, mumbling honeyed and lustful words, things like “You look gorgeous to me right now mi corazón, how about you put that controller down and let me prove it?”

- They’re like a spoiled cat when it comes to your attention, I would know because I have three, and one is currently making my other arm fall asleep.

(There!! Sorry if this came out a little later than it should’ve, I’m a little exhausted from some real stuff, and I stayed up over midnight for this one. The Venture effect lol)

[isa-ghost]

OKAY UM MORE HC WITH THE EGGS IF U GOT ANY (ANY OF THE EGGS)

I'm gonna do Richas because he's my favorite after Chayanne and Lullah :D

qPhil headcanons masterlist

Richas scares Phil a little bc he's a brand of wildchild he's never encountered before. And his parents?? For the most part are just fine with that?? Survivalist man is screaming.

If the Cellbit and Baghera rescue mission had actually happened, Phil would've seen a whole new side of Richas and it'd change his perspective a bit. Still an unhinged gremlin, but also fearless, determined, full of endless love and loyalty. He knows what he's doing and he does it well, he just needs adults to trust that he can do it.

This goes for Pac too, but any jokes Richas makes with his prosthetic leg make Phil lose it, they always take him by surprise and they're always the right amount of out of pocket to make Phil reel. It's even better if Richas removes the prosthetic and does some wild ass shit with it. He's made Phil screech before. It was a mistake on Phil's part, now he tries to make him scream on purpose.

A lot of "peak qsmp era" horrors felt centered around the Brazilians and goddamn does Phil think Richas is so unbelievably resilient bc of it. That kid is so happy go lucky and comes off so carefree despite everything that's happened to him or his myriad of parents and Phil just cannot fathom it bc he would've broken by now.

Which btw Phil thinks it's rlly fucking funny that Richas was collecting parents like Pokémon and every now and then he'd try to come up with a funny convoluted way to Also become Richas's parent purely for the bit. Never came up with one good enough though, being previously FWB with Fit didn't feel like a good enough pipeline. Richas totally would've accepted that reason though.

Be it through his usual brand of unhinged fuckery or genuine persuasion, I think Richas could've gotten Phil to try any Brazilian food or snack, even if Phil was like "there's no way I'll like that." I'm truthing Richas would get him addicted to smth besides Guaraná.

GOD Richas would've loved to spar with Phil. Phil would be far too nervous to go all out on the kid but Richas would absolutely love it.

Richas's tiny arms never fail to make Phil laugh. He just can't. All Richas has to do is Orange Justice and it's all over, Phil's dying until he gets the hiccups.

Richas would be the motherfucker constantly badgering Phil to go fishing if he was able to go back to the Hardcore World with him.

He's, like many others, is in the Phil Take Me Flying When Your Wings Work club.

Tbfh more accurately I think Richas is impatient to hatch in the hopes he'll have wings so he can be taught to fly himself. (And the heart attacks he'd give Phil then.... MAN)

I don't know where in the deep recesses of my brain this came from but I need them in a laser tag fight on the same team because Richas would THRIVE watching Pro Halo Sniper Tío Philza Minecraft absolutely obliterate motherfuckers.

Phil feels a teeny bit bad about it but he's genuinely surprised Richas didn't perma-die with how reckless he could be.

Phil 100% noticed a change in Richas post-Purgatory and isn't sure if it was because of that or because of a death he had around then. Whatever it was, he picked up on Richas seeming a lot more Fuck It We Ball but in a kinda,, maybe needs to at least talk about it to someone way. Not his kid so he didn't want to butt in or overstep, but he still felt worried about it.

100% thinks Richas is overall underestimated though. Or maybe Richas intentionally fools people into thinking such. But Mr. Angel of Death can see it, that kid's TNT in a shell.

[anarchyatthesupermarket]

I want to yell about fic and chapter titling stuff for my necromancy au so like link to series and then spoilers under that

I don't know how much of this will make sense. It's last so my brain isn't working at %100 and I'm autistic so my brain also works in weird ways. I'm bad at articulating my thoughts like this so it all sounded so much better in my head but I had to try. I may add onto this as I get more thoughts about it.

first off, the title of the series itself: "Wait for me, I'm coming, wait, I'm coming with you". Hadestown is based on the greek tragedy of Orpheus and Eurydice (my favorite myth). In both the myth and my fic it's a story about a character trying to get someone they love back thought for my necromancy au it's familial love. I also named this series when I didn't know if it was going to end well or not for Rae (I still don't know but shush, we're not going to talk about that).

The first fic: "I'd be the choiceless hope in grief that drove him unground" from Talk by Hozier references Orpheus and Eurydice. I don't have as much to say about this fic bc I wasn't putting as much thought into the chapter names when I wrote them. "Is this a bunker or a shallow grave" (Hollow Moon, The Crane Wives) references the fact that Rae was just pulled from a grave and how whenever he gets anxious those feelings bring up images of dirt/drowning/death. "Can we skip past the death-death cliches" (Touch, Sleeping at Last) is because that's the chapter where Centross dies but is also brought back to death, he gets to "skip" death.

Second fic: "Though I knew my heart would break" (Francesca, Hozier) is abour Everett and Raemond's death and Francesca by Hozier is about two lovers from Dante's Inferno who die together and then spend the rest of eternity together much like how Everett and Raemond are buried together in the same grave. It's a love song about not regretting the choices that brought them to the end/hell because she (Francesca) would do it all again if she ended up with her lover.

Third fic: "All I want is to flip a switch before something breaks that cannot be fixed" (Touch, Sleeping At Last). Again, partially bc this is a telling of what happened around Centross' death but from Fenris/Centross' pov so it felt right to use the same song. Also again, bringing Centross back to life is fixing something that broke.

Fourth fic: "What will you leave behind? Oh we all still die" (Willow Tree March, The Paper Kites) is about Rae trying to figure out his spot in Lodestar Grove in the aftermath of Centross's death. In this fic he talks to Centross and Momboo and his relationship with both of them has changed a lot, he's gotten closer to Centross while any hope of a friendship with Momboo has been left behind with Centross' death.

5th fic: "How long have you been harboring that venom" (My mind now, Paris Paloma) is referring to the venom/hatred Rae has developed for his magic. There's a line in the song ("was it a first offense?") which I feel like fits really well also to what's going on in Rae's mind at this time with what's happening with Momboo (she hates him so much for one thing that he did) and with himself (beating himself up over loosing control once in the library) while also trying to figure out if he (Rae) did something earlier to deserve being treated like he is.

6th fic: "All my love and terror balanced there between those eyes" (Abstract psychopomp, Hozer). Listen, I just love this song. I don't have a lot to say about Caspian's chapter ("the feeling came late, I'm still glad I met you") by itself but Aax's ("the memory hurts but does me no harm") makes me think about how in FableSMP Aax and Rae knew each other as children even though that isn't canon to this au and Fenris' ("the moment I knew I'd no choice but to love you") feels like Rae's finally accepting that he loves his boyfriends and he's happy and he took so long to figure it out ("the feeling came late") and he wants to treasure the time he has with them even though he's going to bring his family back which Rae is convinced will make Cas/Aax/Fenris/everyone hate him but he doesn't want to throw the present away because of the future ("I'm still glad I met you" even though it's going to end badly like a certain greek myth).

7th fic: "My mind has not been silent" (my mind now, Paris Paloma) is Rae telling Jamie about what happened with Momboo that's been unable to ever fully stop thinking about her words. It's also from the same song as fic #5 with mirror (ish) plot lines of someone close to Momboo finding Rae and talking to him as he's struggling with seeing himself as a monster though Rae tells Jamie what happened between him and Momboo but doesn't tell Fenris.

the 8th fic is just a bunch of short stories but I think the title "we're nothing but myths now" (Yeti, Paris Paloma) fics because it's going to be filled with one-shots of stuff that happened away from what's happening directly around Rae and often talking about stuff that happened before Fenris dug Rae up

#9: "Nothing lasts forever, some things aren't meant to be" (Hello My Old Heart, The Oh Hellos), even if Rae isn't constantly thinking about it in this fic there's this acceptance that he's going to bring back his family and the life he built with his friend's can't last. The mentions of rigor mortis, livor mortis, and adipocere return and there's the last time he gets to hang out with Athena, Jamie, Aax, Caspian, and Fenris bc Rae doesn't know if his relationships with them will survive what he has planned.

#10: "If I don't make it back from where I've gone just know I loved you all along" (Inkpot Gods, The Amazing Devil) is Rae going through with his plan despite his belief that he's going to loose his friends. He talks to Isla's grave but we never get to see Rae saying goodbye to his partners (unlike how he got to say goodbye to his family before their death). Maybe he wanted their last memories of him before they realize he's a monster to be good and happy? And in the end he doesn't make it back because bringing his family back proves to be too much.

[what-aboutno]

New life smp just dropped today which means it’s time for another how to watch post!

So what is New Life SMP? 

New life smp is a modded minecraft smp. In the series players are given a random origin out of over 100 different ones! Everytime they die they are randomly assigned a new Origin. When a player has lost 6 lives they’re out of the series! 

The series includes 19 members at the moment 

(The series as far as I'm aware is only on YouTube at the moment!)

Dangthatsalongname 

fWhip 

GeminiTay

Joey Graceffa 

Katherine Elizabeth

LDShadowLady 

Mythical Sausage 

Seapeekay 

Shubble 

Smallishbeans 

SolidarityGaming

Stacyplays

Strawburry17

TheOrionSound 

OwengeJuiceTV

GoodtimeswithScar 

Pearlescentmoon

Pixlriffs

Inthelittlewood 

From there you can pick a pov and start watching. If you're struggling to pick a pov or you don't know any of these people or maybe you just want to watch someone new. I would recommend trying Owengejuicetv’s pov or TheOrionSound pov! 

Hope this post helps you in some way and have fun watching!

[infinite-tournament]

The Rules

This is a winner-stays-on tournament, so don't expect any brackets. Every week (or whenever the mod remembers), a new contender will be put up against the current champion (which will be listed in the blog's description). If it wins, it becomes the new champion! If not, then the old champion remains until something beats it. In the case of a tie, the contender failing to beat the champion will be counted as a loss, and the champion will move on. There is no set end date for the tournament, and it is intended to continue indefinitely.

Submissions can be sent in here. Submissions sent to the ask box will not be counted. There is space to add propaganda and media if you wish to. There are no restrictions on what can be submitted. The next contender will be randomly selected from the current pool of submissions, though repeat contenders will have to wait a few weeks before they can re-challenge again.

Note: Submissions are put into polls unedited, and thus may include errors.

Previous contenders below the cut

sleep (The Beginning, Champion For 1 Week) Homestar runner from homestar runner (Lost Poll) the color purple (Champion For 3 Weeks) Chat Noir (from Miraculous Ladybug) (Lost Poll) alex eagleston/eggleston from yiik a postmodern rpg (Lost Poll) duck (Champion For 2 Weeks) vanilla extract (lost poll) Garlic bread (Champion For 1 Week) autism (Champion For 15 Weeks) Reigen Arakata from Mob Psycho 100 (Lost Poll) Infinity-Sided Die (Dungeons, Dungeons, and more Dungeons (Gravity Falls)) (Lost Poll) Gay sex (Lost Poll) sage green (Lost Poll) Timothy Stoker (The Magnus Archives) (Lost Poll) The Amazing Devil (band) (Lost Poll) The hit 2011 video game Minecraft (Lost Poll) Ford Prefect (hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy) (Lost Poll) Tom Scott (Lost Poll) The SD (super deformed) Gunpla line (Lost Poll) Heathcliff (Lost Poll) shitposts (Lost Poll) Sans Undertale (Lost Poll) Dire Crowley from twisted wonderland (Lost Poll) asexuality (Champion For 4 Weeks) Lord of the Rings (Lost Poll) bears in trees (band) (Lost Poll) piplup (pokemon) (Lost Poll) aromanticism (Champion For 2 Weeks) Raz from Psychonauts (Lost Poll) Clouds (Champion For 3 Weeks) RYAN GOSLING (Lost Poll) Mike Walters (Woe.Begone) (Lost Poll) lava lamp (Champion For 3 Weeks) Xenoblade Chronicles 2 (Lost Poll) @helinedmightbehere (tumblr blog) (Lost Poll) Hatsune Miku (Champion For 6 Weeks) Toffoli gate (Lost Poll) The time knife (Lost Poll) Pokémon Colosseum (Lost Poll) Communism (Lost Poll) The letter A (Lost Poll) dust motes in a sunbeam (Champion For 3 Weeks) Monster Energy drinks (Lost Poll) The onceler/The Onceler fandom (Lost Poll) Bread products (All of them) (Champion For 13 Weeks) Abed Nadir (Lost Poll) Leafcutter Ant (the animal) (Lost Poll) maroon (Lost Poll) haunted five dollar Applebee's gift card (Lost Poll) Palindromes (Lost Poll) genderqueer (Lost Poll) undertale (Lost Poll) Jamilla Gardner (Woe.Begone) (Lost Poll) drizzile (pokemon) (Lost Poll) The Goonies (Lost Poll) The Dragonriders of Pern series (Lost Poll) nurse Gerard Way (Lost Poll) Palestine (Champion For 5 Weeks) Pansexuality (Lost Poll) the concept of time (Lost Poll) Princess Celestia (Lost Poll) @​HalimedeMF (twitter) (Lost Poll)

[mademoiselle-cookie]

People who accuse Etoiles of being wrong abotu Aypierre-BBH alliance and knowing nothing about their relationship, I have a few questions for you:

Is your main POV BadBoyHalo?

Do you watch Aypierre and/or Etoiles?

Bc Étoiles knows Aypierre. He knows him for years, he ate at his house, he met his wife and children. They still played to Minecraft together and they talked. He is in a much better position to know what's going on in Aypierre's head than anyone on this site, especially people who don't watch either of them.

Also, Étoiles is in general really good at reading people. Roier fans applauded him for his analyse of Roier's way of rping, he had a 100% accuracy rate in his accusations during an Amoung Us with people a lot better than him at the game, etc, etc, etc. And you think he will not be able to analyse someone he knows for years? When he was on point about a person he really played with for a short time?

Do you remember Étoiles was talking about a troller? Did you notice he was talking about cc!Aypierre and not q!Aypierre?

And more importantly, do you remember it's about a course for COINS? And that no one will die? At worse, BBH will not gain money, which is not that necessary and he planned to not spend them anyways. What's the problem then? It would just be fun and good content by trolling someone.

I don't know who need to hear this but BBH is not the center of everyone else's life. Other person/character have other focus and priority than him. Not "betraying" BBH is not their goal in life. If you're that worried about him, remember he was a nightmare in Purgatory, and not only he didn't apologize but he's not even sorry but everyone is still friends with him (don't fool yourself, he would have been equally awful to Aypierre if they weren't in the same team).

[ditzydreamsss]

Slimecicle haunted house video + scu (nvm it's just a lore rant now)

my personal order of scu lore events:

- roll. - Minecraft, but every block is HOSTILE. - Minecraft, but every 5 minutes there's a natural disaster - Minecraft, but it's way more traumatizing - Minecraft, but 100 players are hunting me - The HARDEST Minecraft Difficulty - I Spent 24 Hours in the Most Haunted Place on Earth - DSMP arc - We Spent 100 Days in a Hardcore Minecraft Apocalypse

so how does that fit in?

well vaguely the entire lore i came up with is:

roll. : the start of everything. Charlie and his friends are just wandering around worlds when they load into Narwhal's world- the world with the dice of a hundred(?) sides. After Narwhal fucking. drops the dice on accident, Charlie "consumes" the power from the dice and now oh look he's the most powerful god in existence. Ig reason why Charlie was able to get into Narwhal's server, which is a private server, is because of his abilities to temper with The Code (which is the thing that makes up everything in the world). Kinda like atoms for us. Maybe Charlie's a long lost descendent of the Original God. idk. anyways Charlie splits his newfound powers between Condi and Grizzly. Wheatie leaves them (and never comes back) because he doesn't want to be associated with god powers. They leave on a good note.

Minecraft, but every block is HOSTILE. AND Minecraft, but every 5 minutes there's a natural disaster : They meet Schlatt, he's a funny guy so Charlie gives him god powers and now whoopsie he went psycho. At the end, Charlie banishes him and that does weaken his power, but Charlie's mistake was that he never took away Schlatt's powers, only weakened them.

RLCraft & A Hundred Players are breaks that The Council takes from all these god things. At some point Bizly, a friend they know from a game of DND, becomes a god. After Bizly becomes a god they build Molympus, which is a home for them.

Then after who-knows-how-long, The Council has the bright idea to start The HARDEST Minecraft Difficulty.

Grizzly dies in this.

alright so time for Haunted Asylum stuff.

Charlie, Condi, and Bizly decided to go on a trip to the Real World, which means they will be powerless.

And then at some point they play chess as a ghost. The ghost is Grizzly, who is technically in limbo?

This one specific chess set has connections to the limbo (shh shh plot armor).

(grizzly's comment on the video)

which. of course. equals LORE.

Grizzly's limbo was like he was in a white foggy void (like in the skies with your render distance 0 in mc) and suddenly a chess board popped up. he played along for a little bit before he got annoyed and knocked over all the pieces. The chess board at some point faded away and disappeared. mmm trauma

And then Charlie loses both Bizly and Condi (they literally die canonically)

what happens to condi & bizly & Grizzly:

Condi and Bizly are sent to the afterlife. Because of their connection with Grizzly, their death is the push that lets Grizzly free of his limbo.

They meet up and they're just thinking "bruhh when's Charlie going to join us its been ages"

MEANWHILE

Charlie revists old world's, but is unable to revive anyone, so in grief he resets the entire universe.

He loses his memory in the process.

He becomes c!slime. He stays in the world that would, in many many years, become the Dream Esempii. (Esempii's are how they define multi-people server worlds with admins and stuff)

So Slime leaves Las Nevadas and travels to a random island and stays there, in a pit-hole, until a very long long time later, scientists find Slime and put him in their laboratory. Slime can barely process anything.

Then the zombie virus breaks out (yes, in thosuands-of-years-later DSMP server), and everything goes to shit.

Remeber Schlatt? The ram guy? (Oh yeah also in the reset, Charlie locked up his god powers somewhere very deep inside him)

Schlatt breaks the glass for Charlie. The tube he's in when the video starts.

What are the doubles?

Basically, characters like Florida Man or Patient Zero are like puppets that Slimecicle made himself. His powers, locked away, didn't have anything better to do if as Slime slept for like an eternity.

The Mad Scientist (100days!Condi) was created with the only goal to ruin the world. So he did.

etc, etc.

((*slams The Court Jester on the table* m u s i c))

Since Schlatt had plenty of time to get his power back. So he's stronger than Charlie now. (Charlie's memories got buried deeper into his mind during when he was "sleeping")

Charlie dies.

Then then reunites with the rest of the council.

who, by the way, created a new completely vanilla world with normal respawns and normal mobs, etc.

they escaped the afterlife cause they're gods, idk.

many many years later, a man stumbles upon the vanilla world, or the Reset, with a friend on his shoulders.

His name is Ted.

The friend's name is Schlatt.

Schlatt, who went mad after he killed Charlie, was found by Ted when he was broken. Ted convinced Schlatt to. just let go of his powers because Schlatt actually pulled that power from someone else (idk who, say.. uhhhh.... corn!Charlie or smth). Schlatt lets go. And proceeds to forget everything.

They all chilling now.

started JRWI (Riptide, Prime Defenders, the one-shots, etc.), The Chuckle Sandwich Podcast, etc etc.

Hold on i have this old doc about me ranting about lore one sec..

-----

.....said me. in the past.

think i already posted that before but heres the updated version??

the main point was the Haunted Asylum the rest of it is blurry and mushy and I can change it any time.

[betweengenesisfrogs]

Desynced

So I really like Desynced.

Strictly speaking, it doesn't 100% fit what I was talking about in my Homestuck manifesto, since it's technically a Homestuck fan adventure rather than a brand new work.

However…for a fanwork, it feels more like a new piece of Homestuckian art than many others I've seen?

I'm reminded of an old Hussie formspring response, where the question was about what would happen if siblings living in the same house played SBURB. Hussie's response was that one shouldn't try to solve this with the rules of Homestuck, but instead imagine the kind of story and plot that would suit such a scenario.

Desynced is like that - playing by its own rules. A lot of other fan adventures feel too stuck (ha) in adhering to the rules of SBURB and Paradox Space. Desynced is quite literally playing an entirely different game. It lets go of so much about the way a fan story is traditionally conceived, and brings in its own set of laws and ideas that fit its own story better.

Some things I like, in no particular order:

-The depiction of parents and children - Desynced knocks this out of the park by splitting the difference between faceless authority figures and relatable kids by playing with perception and letting the parents talk to each other as adults, even when they're faceless to their kids. There is some really phenomenal parent-child content here. The relationship between Kate and her father, for instance, is fraught and filled with missed conversations that break my heart

-That in 2024, everybody in the main group gets to be queer and trans from the very start

-That the protagonist kids are Zoomers, and we see that their interests tend not toward 80s movies but things like Minecraft and Discord chats

-That we seem to be building towards a "war in heaven" theme, where different members of the future gods and Carapacians will take different sides in a cosmic struggle

-The music, which is full of bangers and feels like the sequel to the Homestuck bandcamp page that I never knew I needed

-The total reimagining of Jack Noir, which seems like it shouldn't work, but totally does

-The genius way that the game's equivalent of Denizens tie into weird cosmic mysteries

-Alien kids who appear at first glance to be trolls but are quickly revealed to not be trolls at all (maybe they're tieflings)

-The way in this universe, Trollsonas only exist in connection to an obscure game called Hiveswap

-The fact that the fantasy land inhabitants, the equivalent of consorts, are more fleshed out and have their own lives going on instead of just being silly animals - which hints that we're taking 'their existence more seriously and sincerely.

-That when Desynced does "play the Homestuck hits," it reminds you of how good those narrative structures are. Examples include:

Ordinary internet friend group discovers they are all interconnected and inveigled in a vast conspiracy

Making sense of the rules of a confusing alternate gamey-reality that suggests a sense of purpose but doesn't give you instructions for achieving it

Oh, and also, you have to do this while the world is ending and you're about to die

Villain narrator makes fun of you, the reader

Alien kids interrupt your game session to ramble at you about how they know much more about the game than you do, but it turns out they're just a tiny bit ahead and they're as confused about most things as you are

Ascending to godhood helps you redefine your identity but also causes as many problems as it solves

It's like, woah, Homestuck was really cooking, wasn't it?

We're all so used to the Homestuck plot structures and conventions that I think it's very easy to lose sight of why we fell in love with it in the first place. Reading Desynced made me remember how much I love the premise of Homestuck. Desynced achieves this by detaching from convention and focusing on Homestuck's themes: parent-child relationships, the limitations of one's ideology, the double-edged sword of finding identity in fantasy, and more.

So yes, Desynced is a Homestuck fanwork. But if we're asking where a Homestuck literary movement might go in the future, Desynched offers us a really neat glimpse of part of the answer.

I highly recommend checking it out, if you're interested.

-Ari