oqmemphis

[oqmemphis]

plot devices

[oqmemphis]

TELL IT HOW IT IS GIRL 👏

[oqmemphis]

Io Moth (Automeris io), male, family Saturniidae, OK, USA

photograph by Susan Sanders

[oqmemphis]

alright there's been no new responses in a while so i'm calling it here. stats under the cut for anyone who's interested

The form had a total of 76 responses. The average response included 36 names (of the 346 listed on the survey), with the shortest list being 14 names and the longest being 91. No two people submitted the exact same list.

Only three respondents typed anything in the write-in box at the bottom; one person simply wrote "No", one wrote in Lou Wilson (despite him being listed on the form), and the third briefly explained their thought process and then gave me a compliment. Thanks, that one person!

31 cast members were included by at least half of respondents. They are:

Brennan Lee Mulligan (100%)

Zac Oyama (100%)

Ally Beardsley (99%)

Ify Nwadiwe (97%)

Mike Trapp (97%)

Grant O'Brien (95%)

Jacob Wysocki (95%)

Sam Reich (95%)

Izzy Roland (91%)

Jess Ross (91%)

Lily Du (91%)

Lou Wilson (88%)

Siobhan Thompson (88%)

Vic Michaelis (88%)

Katie Marovitch (87%)

Erika Ishii (86%)

Josh Ruben (80%)

Brian David Gilbert (78%)

Jess McKenna (78%)

Raphael Chestang (76%)

Emily Axford (74%)

Oscar Montoya (70%)

Tao Yang (70%)

Anna Garcia (68%)

Aabria Iyengar (64%)

Brian Murphy (61%)

Ross Bryant (61%)

Amy Vorpahl (58%)

Jiavani (51%)

Becca Scott (50%)

30 people had an inclusion rate between 10% and 50%:

Paul Robalino (49%)

Carolyn Page (45%)

Jacquis Neal (42%)

Carlos Luna (43%)

Kimia Behpoornia (42%)

Jordan Myrick (38%)

Rick Perry (41%)

Zach Reino (37%)

Ryan Creamer (36%)

Rashawn Nadine Scott (33%)

Monét X Change (30%)

Michael Schaubach (29%)

Lisa Gilroy (25%)

Danielle Radford (28%)

Adam Conover (24%)

Zeke Nicholson (22%)

Chris Grace (24%)

Persephone Valentine (21%)

Elaine Carroll (20%)

Michael Saltzman (20%)

Jess Clemons (20%)

David Cyr Kerns (14%)

Mano Agapion (18%)

Alex Song-Xia (14%)

Jeremy Culhane (14%)

Ele Woods (14%)

Ruha Taslimi (14%)

Caitlin Reilly (12%)

Caldwell Tanner (11%)

Paul F. Tompkins (11%)

Performers in orange do not appear under the "Cast members" list on Dropout's Wikipedia page. That list additionally contains two people who were included by fewer than 10% of respondents: Jon Gabrus (8%) and Christine Medrano (4%).

Currently doing a survey to try and figure out who people consider to be in the "regular cast" of Dropout. If you're interested in filling it out, link's here:

Note: this form has a lot of names on it, but I promise it's not as time-consuming as it looks - most of them are folks who've only appeared a couple of episodes.

[oqmemphis]

You run a Bakery, just a normal bakery, the only problem is that your customers at midnight to 6AM are mythical creatures who pay with gemstones and ancient gold and silver coins

[oqmemphis]

i love this because i can look at the notes on this post and see people saying "oh yeah i only count people who've appeared regularly on a variety of shows" and then i look at the results spreadsheet and find that one person counted Ben from Jet Lag as a "regular cast member"

Currently doing a survey to try and figure out who people consider to be in the "regular cast" of Dropout. If you're interested in filling it out, link's here:

Note: this form has a lot of names on it, but I promise it's not as time-consuming as it looks - most of them are folks who've only appeared a couple of episodes.

[oqmemphis]

[oqmemphis]

Currently doing a survey to try and figure out who people consider to be in the "regular cast" of Dropout. If you're interested in filling it out, link's here:

Note: this form has a lot of names on it, but I promise it's not as time-consuming as it looks - most of them are folks who've only appeared a couple of episodes.

[oqmemphis]

"Hey, what do you want for Ch-"

I don't know, as soon as you started the question, I somehow momentarily was struck with such a lack of desire for any material goods that there's now a school of thought in Buddhism who reveres my ADHD riddled brain as a potential speedrun to enlightment.

[oqmemphis]

Hahahaha

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#HOW DID JEDUS CATCH UP ?????? do they even know the impact of phan..#VOTE PHAN CMON#phan#jedus#dan and phil#the bible#tumblr polls#rpf

okay i'm sorry but this is The Tumblr Post. this is a condensed cube of pure hellsite culture. i do not believe any other post will ever do a better job of exemplifing what the fuck this site is. we're done here. congrats everyone.

(the prev tags are a necessary component of this btw. the fact that a single post is tagged with #dan and phil, #the bible and #rpf is a vital part of the experience.)

Best RPF Ship - FINAL!

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I want a story about a king whose son is prophesied to kill him so the king is like “whatever what am I supposed to do, kill my own kid wtf is wrong with you” so he just raises him as normal, doesn’t even tell him about the prophecy, and instead of some convoluted twist of events that leads to the king’s murder the son grows up and when the king is very old and dying and in excruciating pain the kid is just like alright I'mma put him out of his misery.

[oqmemphis]

SCP-8435 - The Law Without Land

A story about a haunted House, bickering wizards and an idiot who wants to run the world.

[oqmemphis]

why does this story sound exactly like a particular variety of tumblr microfiction

[cw: violence and drug use, transcript under cut]

But before I go, I'd like to leave you with this thought. I'm aware that words can mean different things in different places. For example, in Glasgow, the word 'entrepreneur' means someone who'll kill your ex for eighty quid. But what about the word 'superstition'? I'd say I'm highly skeptical of most superstitions. I don't believe that drinking the blood of virgins keeps you young -- I just like the taste. I suppose the only belief I have that could be classed as superstitious, at a push, is that you can predict the future by examining the spilled entrails of an animal. That's why a couple of months ago, naked as the day I was born, I adorned a goat with ribbons and bells, doused it with sacred oils, kissed it on the forehead and slaughtered it with a hand axe in my garage. As I knelt among the hot guts of the still-twitching goat, I saw a problem: there was a small toy truck lodged in the upper intestine of the goat. The omen was clear: there would soon be a catastrophic collapse of Britain's trucking sector. As I'm heavily invested in both the UK road haulage industry and a variety of people-trafficking schemes, I had to do something. I needed to focus. So using a basic honey and CBD oil base, I mixed a 50/50 blend of ketamine and MDMA, and washed it down with four Red Bulls and the remains of a Wall's Viennetta which I found at the back of a garage chest freezer next to what looked like a human hand but that I may have been hallucinating by then. By the time I returned to something approaching rationality, it was too late. My phone was already sending me alerts about the lack of British truck drivers, focusing on how difficult it would be to quickly train the replacements, as simultaneously urinating in an empty Lucozade bottle while suffocating a hitchhiker with your other hand is a skill that can take years to learn. I had to do something, and quickly. I needed to focus. So using a basic honey and CBD oil base, I mixed a 30/60/10 blend of mescaline, peyote and PCP, washed down with some water I found sitting in an old hosepipe and some strips of goat liver that I flash-fried on the garage floor using some lawnmower fuel. By the time I returned to something approaching rationality, I was already twenty minutes late for recording my film review podcast, Focus on Film (Location). I'd arranged to have a chat with Laura Simons, who'd worked as assistant location manager on Christopher Nolan's Interstellar, which is one of my top ten thousand films of all time. I needed to focus. So using a basic honey and CBD oil base, I mixed a 30/12/18/40 blend of heroin, Xanax, mushrooms and fentanyl, and washed it down with some semi-fermented goat urine which I sucked straight from the bladder. By the time I returned to something approaching rationality, I found myself with my head caught sideways in the abdominal cavity of the goat. And six days after I first led Snowflake into my garage, I was freed by a traumatised postman, to whom I would like to apologise. And I'd also extend that apology to Laura Simons. Laura, thank you for arriving on time to our meeting at Caffe Nero. That naked man tangled in strips of animal hide and screaming about the British trucking industry was me, but I can see why you felt the need to taser me. Goodnight.

[oqmemphis]

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An incomplete taxonomy of esoteric texts:

This text is discussing esoteric subject matter

This text is being deliberately obscure because its author knows they don't have a coherent thesis and they're blowing smoke

This text is written in earnest, but its author has very poor communication skills

This text's translator has misunderstood something that was meant completely literally as a complex metaphor

This text is actually perfectly straightforward in its native language, but every available translation fucking sucks

[oqmemphis]

Oh sure, self-negate yourself from nothingness all you like. At a certain point, apophasis is a band-aid fix. To get from infinity to immanence, sacrifices have to be made. Infinity is static, the world isn't. Q.E.Fucking.D.

All-knowing, all-good, all-powerful. You gotta pick one to drop, but nobody said you have to pick one forever. Nah. You can cycle through them, and you can cycle through them so fast it seems like you're all of em at once, AND none of em at once. That's the Wheel.

It's as close to perfect as you can get. Someone did all the cosmic math a few kalpas ago. A hypostate of The One which asymptotically approaches perfection. But that infinitely small gap is still a gap. The cosmic gears don't quite mesh, and where they grind, sparks fly. That's why bad things happen to good people.

With every spark, the wheel loses a bit of momentum. There needed to be someone to correct the mistakes, to keep one second ticking every second.

Howdy.

But I can't just flick the cosmos back into place. Nah. It's a big system. It needs one hell of an engine. You think things are bad now? If the flame wasn't here, you'd all be up to your tits in suffering. It's a clever system really. Toss it all in the fire. It'll keep the wheel turning another day. Two birds, one stone.