#--and how they are being planted here.
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Honestly speaking, what was Storm there for aside from causing romantic drama between the brothers and giving birth to a main character then dying immediately after?
Also, what was the point of Gray Wing pining after Clear Sky’s first two mates? (Granted I don’t actually remember if he truly pined after Bright Stream or it was just that one lovely comment)
I remember decently enjoying DOTC my first read through, but honestly reading your analysis of it, it’s a bit of a mess. (Though I do remember even then being frustrated with Clear Sky lol)
The narrative function of Bright Stream and Storm is to cause pain in the two male main characters, Clear Sky and Gray Wing. The point of Gray Wing pining for these two mates is to cause more pain to him when they die, because the writers believe that it would matter less if they were simply his friends or in-laws.
I do subscribe heavily to the idea that a character is a writer's tools, and they exist for you to tell a story with them. You can tell a lot about the writer, as well, by examining the way they use their tools. The writers don't value women the same way they value men, and they don't value friendships or found family on the same level that they value romantic interests and blood family.
And so they fridge two female characters in one book, using them as devices to further the story of the male characters they do care about.
The other arcs have their issues as well, but it's flagrant with DotC, probably because the team constructed the entire thing out of whole cloth with only minor inspiration from material like the field guides. With a brand new story and no commitment to fan favorites from old arcs, their biases are on full display.
It's an obvious answer, but a disappointing one nonetheless.
#He doesn't pine for Bright Stream the same way he pines for Storm but that's largely because Bright Stream gets less focus#He makes a lot of comments about her beauty and how he desires her#But she's Clear Sky's mate early on and then they're focusing on the journey#Meanwhile with storm Gray Wing is actively courting her#Warrior Cats Analysis#Bonefall Reads DOTC#There IS good in this arc but I can't get over how incredibly obviously bad the misogyny and xenophobia is in this one#The xenophobia also really really bothers me#But it's not quite as bad in Sun Trail as in other books#If I have any regrets with how I've talked about Sun Trail it's that I didn't devote any time to pointing out the seeds of xenophobia --#--and how they are being planted here.#But the misogyny has been so brazen it's hard not to talk about it
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Do yall have headcanons for heavenly demon babies/toddlers ? (as speaking of half demons like Binghe) I have a preg Bingge eventual BinggYuan AU where he has a little son, and I'd love to read what you think about the growing process and shenanigans of raising heavenly demon child
(little doodle of reference of Bingge and his son, Chuxin)
#svsss#人渣反派自救系统#luo binghe#original luo binghe#original male character#mpreg#binggyuan#just heads up this is not pidw shen yuan's son#but technically he is bc he is svsss sy!sqq's son#listen I have a doc where all this make sense but its too mesy to share out of discord#just so you know this is a different outcome of#the bingge vs bingmei extra#and bingge has very very complicated feelings about being a single dad(mom)#but he loves his son#and he is gonna make bad decisions#I just want midterms to be over so I can finally draw more again#technically here Bingge becomes intersex due to usual pidw shady plants that is how he had the anatomy to carry chuxin
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Prompt 196
So. Tucker might’ve done an oopsie. But it’s not his fault! How was he supposed to know you weren’t supposed to even be able to hack into the watchtower with a PDA? He uses PDAs for everything, and it’s not like it’s even hard???
…
Why are the heroes looking at him like that?
#Dcxdp#Dpxdc#Prompts#Danny is in the kitchen also bemused with Sam#None of them are aware how crazy their stunts are thx to everything being trial by fire#They’re in the kitchen trying to get Sam’s darling rosebush & Tucker’s mini meat dragon to stop fighting#The heroes who came here because someone hacked into the watchtower are looking at all of this in horror#The three of them just wanna have a calm break before college man#Or internships#They got married for the tax benefits & because they’re all Ride or Die at this point#All three are ace#There's a big flag on their wall made out of living plants
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the more i look at it the more i realize human domestication guide stuff is really just "what if a species of benevolent but *extremely* patronizing aliens doms invaded, and their master plan was (in equal measure) cherishing and infantilizing autistic trans girls with problematic kinks (who love it)"
and wouldn't you know it, turns out i'm in the target demo
#read one fic written by autistic trans author which basically boiled down to:#“hey. we know you're really trying hard to be 'high functioning'. everyone sees it. you did good. how about you rest now and we take over?”#except. you know. kinky plant aliens imposing this on her cuz she had internalized capitalist and ableist shit and thought she had to just#keep burning herself out because that was what was expected of her. cuz other people could handle it even if she couldn't. so here comes th#kinky plant alien dom to gently force being loved and supported and cared for (and fucked by kinky plant alien doms) down your throat.#and after reading that i had a literal “ohh. i get it.” moment
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Okay I am forced to admit that Texas is kind of beautiful
#theres some really amazing ecology here like super cool habitats and plants and animals we dont have in TN#it sucks how yall are being overrun by stupid housing developments and way too big interstates#jawjackin#scenery
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Both my parents actually suffer from HORRID emotional dysregulation and are prone to snapping and going into rages. My sister is the same way tbh. I am now realizing this is why they are constantly baffled by the question of whether or not I am mad at them.
I don't have external meltdowns.
I could. I don't let it happen.
I keep my rage on the inside and stay pretty quiet about it. It's just as strong as theirs [physically shaking nose bleed from high blood pressure kind of bad], but like as a kid I saw how terrifying it was to be around [dad breaking dishes, mom putting our lawn chairs into walls] and I just internalized that I wasn't going to wear that anger on the outside.
So my mother genuinely cannot tell if I am just being quiet or if I am silently hearing the dial-up noises of pure rage. This has lead her to both making strong and confident statements like "You are a pacifist who would never hurt a fly U.U" but also acting like I am secretly dangerous maybe... It's because she has never seen me snap.
She knows what her temper is like [throwing chairs through walls], she knows what my father's temper is like [pick up child and toss out door], and she can tell I am being tested, but she doesn't know what happens when I snap or where that breaking point is.
Her -perhaps unhinged- solution to this, my whole life, has been to do things that should obviously enrage me or shut me down completely, like ignoring important boundaries, repeatedly, punishing me for expressing emotions or needs at all, etc... And then to constantly ask me if I am angry with her when I get too quiet [right after near directly telling me to shut up].
It has occurred to me now, they have never once seen me lose my temper, so they literally just can't tell if I am angry at them. My sister is easy, my mother fights and screams with my sister constantly, my mother understands this. My mother doesn't have any grasp of feelings or boundaries that are not screamed at her [apparently, and I fear my sister is the same way]. Her and my sister are close despite constant fucking fighting because they understand each other.
They are trying to get me to engage the same way and it is not working. I realize now that this has been hard for them.
I was so successfully taught to suppress my emotions, by being punished for any outburst, that rage quiet looks the same as any other kind of quiet from the outside. To them anyway.
I did tell her. For the record. I used my words. I did tell her very calmly that my response to rage, in order to avoid doing the things that terrified me as a child, was to simply leave [the autistic urge to GTFO]. When a situation or person causes too much of the dial-up rage noise, I simply extract myself from that situation, up to and including never speaking to a person again. I explained this calmly. I explained it calmly 100 times and I explained that I explain myself calmly as my rage response 1-5 [also pretty much every other negative emotion tbh], and I told her that what came next was me simply opting out and fucking off. I told her this. I couldn't understand why she never took me seriously, or why she never fucking understood.
I couldn't understand what made her like this.
But it's the same problem I have with everyone else multiplied by a factor of 10.
If I am explaining myself calmly, they can't understand that it's actually serious or that I am actually upset. ESPECIALLY because they read me as "female" and women "aren't that rational" so if I am not screaming and crying about something, which I never do, people assume I can't be upset and it isn't serious.
And then after having my boundaries ignored too many times despite having calmly explained how and why it's a problem [shaking inside or not]... I leave. I leave and everyone gets upset like this is unexpected behaviour, even though I told them 50 times that is how I would respond if they kept doing *the thing.*
And for neurotypical people especially, they are expecting there to be a disconnect between what someone says they need or feel and what their actually boundaries and feelings are, and they expect the latter to be demonstrated with emotions. Telling them bluntly you do not function that way somehow never helps?
My mother isn't just looking for normal yelling or a few tears to know I am serious, whether or not I do those either [I don't], she's looking for an explosion to know there's a problem at all.
Fucked if I know how she proceeds through life this way in general or if this is just her expectation of her own kids???
And I couldn't get why my mother couldn't read my emotions and didn't seem to think I have any. It's because she's testing for the rage limit to see where my 'actual' limit is instead of taking my word for it. Never the fuck mind that she could simply *not* test at my boundaries instead of letting me have them. Separate issue.
I couldn't figure out what made her *like this*
She's expecting me to throw a giant meltdown violent tantrum at people when I have 'actually' had enough. Maybe she got away with those being like 5'4" in another time, but I am the size of the average man, I do not get to have giant screaming rages, whether or not people perceive me consciously as a woman, and least of all because a lot of people -at least unconsciously- read me as 'masculine' or at least always "they guy" of the situation compared to all other women and some men [bigger stronger and more rational, more able to just absorb the damage and let it go so the less rational screaming/crying one doesn't have to be dealt with]. Even if it was in me to be willing to terrify people [usually never], there are such limited instances where it wouldn't just blow back on me. Potentially very dangerously.
I am going to be the quiet calm one. You are going to have to let me use my words, bitch.
So she kept ignoring my boundaries until I had to cut her out of my life, and she probably doesn't understand and probably thinks it feels sudden -after 36 long years of bullshit- abrupt and unfair.
But I told her hundreds of times.
I probably should have just screamed at her.
#good stay out of our yard' and he didn't seem to know what to say to that#but other than that I don't think anyone in my adult life has ever seen me turn aggressive at all to the point where people 100% like to#play games of testing my patience and my boundaries because they think my tolerance is infinite#but like I have autistic rage tantrums on both sides of my family and they are just happening inside my head#And somehow it took me until now to realize that being that way was actually -expected- of me by my parents and especially my mother#and that by keeping myself outwardly level headed to be considerate I actually took away whatever signals she can understand#to have empathy for how I must be feeling#I mean it's still all on her#but it makes so much sense of why she's fucking *like this*#And why my sister thinks I hate her just because -she- stopped texting -me-#but that fucking guy#Every time I was like#In my adult life I have screamed at someone ONE whole time and it was 1000% deserved#And I threw heavy objects around one whole other time and in my defense I didn't do it in front of the guy he just felt the ground shaking#heard the thuds and came back to the logs blocking his path because that fucker wouldn't stop parking in our yard after being asked#and then TOLD not to about 10 times because he was acting entitled to just park in our yard and was crushing my plants???#seriously I don't know what his deal was but he wouldn't stop telling me how much the ground shaking scared him like it was supposed#to get my pity like I think this guy took one look at the logs I had just tossed down and was suddenly afraid of this “woman” he was#bullying in their own yard and so my ability to feel bad for scaring him had gone straight out the fucking window#I looked at him and said stop parking in our yard instead of your own you are killing my plants#he'd just fucking be like 'well the last people to live here let us D: :)“ and I'd be like ”good for them?“ ”stop“#and he'd just keep doing it#I was having a week of insomnia and was finally having the best dream#the kind of sex dream you have like twice in your life#and this fucker had just gotten some noisy ass little bike with a spoiler on it#and starts it up right under my window at 3am from IN OUR FUCKING YARD#so I had a nice long anger nap and just after he got home from work and was sleeping in his house#I picked up these chunks of deadwood tree from the back#there was like 3-4 logs that used to be a WHOLEASS fucking oak tree Like these logs were not as heavy as they -looked- but they were still#this fucker deleted half the tags I wrote and I am not retyping that fuck you tumblr so fucking hard
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DPxDC Prompt: The Child Who Was King
(For anybody who has read my DPxDC fics you might know that I'm a huge fan of the "Unaging Danny" headcanon and this was directly inspired by that)
------
The team has already heard about Phantom in one way or another. Yes, the tyrant "Pariah Dark" had his name mentioned in some places but it was called the "Phantom Zone" for a reason. "Phantom Zone", "Land of the Dead", "Underworld", "Limbo" and countless other names are listed and describe the same place.
It also describes a King be it vicious or kind, old or young, a threat or a peace keeper. The stories are so varied that it's impossible for the League to know who to expect when they receive a mysterious sticky note which falls from the sky during the meeting.
Soon.
The entire League is on edge, not knowing what to think until some members (Zatana and Constantine) recognize the symbol on the paperwork from ancient texts. The Symbol of the God of Time. Zatana says that Time works close with the King of Death and is send to bend at his will and often sends warning messages like this to alert those who are required to know. While Constantine just wants to leave before things get to be any more of a headache.
Days turn into weeks.
Weeks into months.
Most of the team thinks it was a mistake but one member of the team stays particularly on edge because the paper fell in front of them specifically. It isn't until they're on patrol in their area that another note appears with an address and a time and when they arrive in the area they make it just in time for a green portal to open and somebody to fall out of it.
They react, years of training tell them to catch the figure and when they do they discover a child no older than 14 under weight, pale with black hair and blue eyes, bruises covering them. They're breathing heavily as the kid leans against the heroes chest fearfully, the cape seeming much larger than them.
The hero doesn't know what to think when one final note appears.
Due to reasons which can not yet be discussed King Phantom is not safe in the Land of the Dead, you are here by entrusted with his protection. If you fail all will be lost.
#dcxdp#ngl I picture the hero being Batman but it could be any here#I just love the batfam#Bruce struggles to explain himself when he gets home#because like what do you say?!#sorry Alfred I would have warned you but this kid litterally dropped into my lap#Danny wakes up in the human realm for the first time in what is *hundreds* of years if not thousands for him#just to find out that it's only 2023 and then he's just like 'this is bullshit'#then when Bruce tells the League what happened and introduces Danny they're shook because “this child is the god of death? Very funny Bruce#Danny is also just trying to remember how to be a person#he also has to relearn that he has to actively use his powers to fly here because it's not the ghost zone where he just *floats* eveywhere#the amount of times he has stepped off of something high or fallen face down on the ground because he forgets gravity exists drives him nut#the siblings start keeping a “days since Danny last face planted” counter.
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its probably meant to be somewhat ambiguous but it seems most likely that armand was gaslighting louis so that he didn't trust himself and daniel didn't trust him. he also seemed to basically get what he wanted by instigating a fight and igniting some passion, we see by next ep's start it probably got resolved with sex and absolution. idk the talamasca angle is not as interesting a story
Ask is in reference to this post: HERE
That's cool. You're able to hold that I'm able to hold mine. Interpretations are just that. I will say it doesn't matter whether Armand planted them, or not, because he still ends up gaslighting Louis in the 2x04 argument anyway. It’s effectively gaslighting even if they are telling the truth here as they see it because of how things stack up and what's said.
It is basically how you said, and I'll just go ahead and expand for anyone who might not see it so clearly. Initially, it seems he's more or less trying to just get Louis off his case for the photos, and is willing to throw him, his mental state, and character under the bus, to do so. But Louis already straight up knows him of doing manipulative things, of this exact sort, in the interview before this event even occurred - Namely that Armand is making himself look far more approachable, and better to Daniel, even after they'd both agreed to basically tear this guy to shreds, which makes Louis look worse by default, and goes against what they agreed to both do. Armand has a repeated tendency to fall through on his promises, or promise things, but then take it his own direction when it suits him. In all cases, he does keep obstructing Louis interview, especially when it comes to Daniel, and won't fully admit to it. - this is why Louis' so reactive, among just the fact he has trauma related to being denied his own interiority, fullness, and freedoms, because he's Black, and in society, seen less human. Armand simply doesn't help his case by denying it, even if it were actually his truth that the photos weren't his doing. (Note; Armand has also faced horrific dehumanizing traumas, but in such a differing way I don't think he's able to empathize with the same way Louis been dehumanized in life. I argue a little if Louis is even able to do more than simply hold a lot of sympathy for Armand, as they really are not a lot alike in both their interior and exterior reality. I don't think that sympathy goes both ways often.)
The way he's also keeps behaving like the bigger person in this reinforces the belief Armand wants out of Louis, making him 'see' it, and probably also to Daniel as well who's definitely overhearing this (this particular part has a chance of being unintentional however, if he was only really intending to deescalate, but it still keeps the same effects).
Not only making Louis look like he's crazy to assume it, but denying he'd been doing anything wrong of the sort (by simply at no point coming forward and saying something reassuring of Louis reality along the lines of, 'I have been doing those things, it's just not this, and those weren't my intentions to hurt you with it, I'm sorry' or simply 'okay, I did it, sorry'). As well, it doesn't matter how much Armand's truthful, Louis is someone who necessarily does need reality checks like that, because he suffers from hallucinations, and as he's finding out, memory lapses, and not providing them will make him jump to presume it could be his own symptoms. Also, at one point in the argument, he actually throws out that Louis is insane, if it needed to be anymore obvious. Which is derogatory, if arguably true, though reinforces that Armand's behaviors to 'stop or aid his madness' in prior instances were all a-okay, and all necessary. There's nothing wrong with him, and what he's doing, its all Louis. (His intentions to deescalate, if anyone wants to take on that idea, would've changed by then. It reads as a pattern to me mimicking of the promises falling through.)
Anyway, I'd be saying in my interpretation that him willing to keep this up, even though the photos had nothing to do with it, just shows how much he'd actually use any situation that arises to manipulate/control Louis, and mess with Louis interview, as opposed to orchestrating or planning situations, so he can then also manipulate with it. With all intentions or not, it doesn't really matter. Which makes his manipulation more realistic, honestly. A better portrait of who Armand is tbh.
I don't claim this transcript as 100% accurate, but it's as close as I can get it:
L: Four Fred Steins in the album, four. You made me look foolish.
A: You just assume it was me.
L: Well, it wasn’t me.
A: You sure about that?
L: Excuse me?
A: I take it back.
L: Take it way fucking back.
A: It was probably an honest mistake from the staff.
L: You think I need to be coddled, hyped up, lied to?
-cut-
A: You’re being Lestat!
L: Go call on him, see what happens.
A: A little ridiculous… It's the staff, dear.
L: I’m being ridiculous? You wanna see, you wanna see ridiculous?
A: No, Louis, it was an honest mistake. You knew it.
L: AAAH
A: You weren’t here-
L: LA LA LA LA
A: -And more and more of them-
L: LA LA
A: They got through!
-flashbacks-
A: This isn’t about Lestat!
-more flashback-
L: You lobbed at Daniel, and disrespected me.
A: no no no no no no.
-flashback-
L: and over and over and over it’s always the same damn thing.
A: You trying to trick me?
L: I don’t know I’m just your God now. The abandonment, and aren’t we both cut throat?
A: You won’t believe me, when I was here. I’m the one who can see!
L: Alright, first off, first off.
A: You are insane!
-fb-
L: You always do this! … We’ll be done with Daniel any day now. Now, knock it off. Its about the record, this is my interview. You hear me? The whole interview that will be heard by me.
A: In a future that you won’t see!
-fb-
L: No more! Will you go to speak without asking first. No more! Will you ever flirt around on your years.
A: Oh, come to Dubai, Louis says, but not me.
-Then I can’t make out anything-
Sex and absolution I do agree with as well. Like they did do that. I don't think either were expecting it to go that way from the beginning, though, as in neither started or orchestrated a reason for argument just to have makeup sex. That being somewhat normal for them after a big argument like that would not surprise me however. A certain interpretation I take of them having sex after (given the argument) was more that (it seems to me) part of the accusations here is that Armand is 'flirting' to win over Daniel's favor, and trying to get with him? Maybe even back together with him? (Centered a lot around Armand telling him his little love story with Lestat.) If not, just turning him against him. So having sex could reinforce Armand had/has no intentions of leaving, further obstructions wrt Daniel, and/or infidelity. That it's 'me and you' and not 'you and him'. (Which could be the real lie depending on how you want to take it here lmao. And is so bound to fall through because... Armand doesn't keep his promises, not even to himself it seems since he turned Daniel).
Again all interpretations are just that, so long as it can be legitimately supported by the text, and isn't grossly insensitive. The Talamasca just adds to the whole scene to me more than it detracts from it. The outside world necessarily has influenced both of their inside worlds, and further how they interact with each other in both, and is the cause behind of a lot of their behaviors and reactions. Talamasca causing those to erupt sort of points to that. It's real. The whole narrative actually feels more concrete and like there's a world outside who can still influence them if they were the one's doing it. Sometimes I feel people want to center Louis a bit too much in the story, which is fair, it is his story, he has a narrative that should be centered, but it is also other people's story as well. They are playing roles here in it.
Also this is why I really wonder if they'd ever revisit this? I'm a little peeved about it being so hidden tbh. There seems like so much added context and we're denied most of it from the music and constant flashbacks. Fingers-crossed maybe Daniel was recording it? IDK.
#If this post is long it's because I got too into it#iwtv#interview with the vampire#There's so much going on in this argument I could make another whole post about it#little more in the tags I guess#If both of them are telling their truth Armand still is the one who owes Louis assurance of his reality because he's the one#being accused of nefariously trying to manipulate Louis and his interview. And denying the photos denies the entire reality of things Louis#sees as being manipulative to him and the interview.#basically he has far too much evidence stacked against him to be denying what Louis especially of what he is seeing#As it doesn't ever acknowledge Louis is the wounded party here who also has certain support needs. And not support needs in the way Armand#seems to 'think' he needs thus sewing doubt that he is 'worse off'. Making his symptoms looks worse than they are. Hence gaslighting.#He's doing it the whole time not just the photos so it... doesn't matter who planted them.#Note as well like Louis has A LOT to be triggered by for whenever Armand doesn't follow through on his promises considering how things#in Paris played out. said he wanted him -> gave him up#went to change Madeline -> didn't follow through#loumand#louis de pointe du lac#armand#amc iwtv#iwtv season 2
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Why is writing so hard lol
Wish it could be faster but forcing the feeling is impossible. Begin with musical ritual. Scrolling walls of artful halls. Masticating prose. Sink and dwell and rot with a feeling caught.
And then a different part of the story retches to page. Like prepping a body for possession. Sometimes a spirit you didn’t expect comes calling with an embrace you can’t escape.
I wish the process was outline, drafts, edit, and edit, edit, edit, edit, etc. But I need to check the moon the bugs the wide space of tide
drown my pretentious ass and toss me out to sea
It needs to be real and alive within, burgeoning to escape before I can excise a word.
I don’t think I’d like it easy
#for real though what are your tips and tricks#writing#what does it feel like for you folks what is your process#I’m being flowery but basically it’s music reading and art and thinking and weed here lol#HOW DO YOU WRITE#like does this ring true to anyone else because it’s a whole ass feel for me#ignore this for real I love my process and product but I have a whole ass story I want to write#and the peas are starting to bloom but I need the fucking potatoes now and wtf I watered there is that vine dead?#I know I’m not alone in this and trying to catch that feeling in so much word#time to see if I can call down a specter of sucking tongue we need love in this world#it’s the alien chest burster scene folks the story within a beautiful creature coming forth from blood of gut and I’m delighted it’s free#stitch me back up and I’m running out to face plant into a new egg#give me tools for a normal process lol or is this the process no one irl I know writes#the musical ritual is Under Giant Trees followed by a Disturbia jumpscare I love it shuffle the list#and the artful halls are your delightful blogs that prose I’m chewing is ao3 life is good looool#FLOW that’s what it is trying to invoke flow is impossible all the time#gotta train my inner spirit of determination to power through#IGNORE THIS IM FINE AND LOVE IT ALL#I WOULD VER MUCH LIKE IT EASY SOMETIMES
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I just want it to be tomorrow after work so I can get unfathomably high on edibles and turn off my brain for at least a few days
#i want to be 'can barely form a sentence' high#i want to be so high that I can't think or feel for a while#don't want to think about being alone for another fucking holiday#don't want to think about being alone for the rest of my life#don't want to think about how scared i am of what the next 4 years will bring#don't want to think about all of the people hurting now#don't want to think about how I'm a weak baby for whining about my own problems#don't want to think about no matter how much dumb shit and art supplies i buy I'm still alone#don't want to think about the only person who loved me unconditionally being dead#don't want to think about how scared i am of velma getting sick or hurt because then i won't have anyone#don't want to think about all the things I've done that could bite me in the ass#don't want to think about the horrific inequality here and everywhere and I'm here just one person like an ant on a sand dune#don't want to think about how my desperation to be loved also makes me feel like a greedy asshole when so many have less#don't want to think about how much i want to punch some of my coworkers#don't want to think about the friendly obvious idiot who sent me a tape full of love songs but clearly has no romantic love for me#don't want to think about how hard it is to even find a game to distract myself with#don't want to think about how many of my plants are dead/dying and what a useless gardener i am#don't want to think about my car and how i worry about when it's eventually going to break down#don't want to think about the cysts on my scalp that i need to cut out myself because I can't afford to have it done professionally#don't want to think about how it's probably just a stupid kids daydream that I'm trying to save up for a house#don't want to THINK or FEEL or NEED or WANT i just want to be semi-comatose stoned because it feels like nobody would notice if i were dead#depression#vent
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this is a stupid pet peeve but idk. 'Cooking is an art baking is a science ' is bullshit. you can follow a baking recipe step by step mirroring the original cook Exactly and still get a crap end result.
this is because your kitchen is not their kitchen. unless you live very close to them, their ingredients might be Radically different from yours even if they're technically the same thing. and worse of all. even if you're roommates. if they made their thing first the conditions will be different when you make yours.
like. baking is just ratios. ratio of starch to water to binder to leavener to etc etc.
But you have to include things like. ambient humidity and temperature and where the crop your flour is from was grown and what strain of yeast your using and when your starch was harvested and what the cows and chickens who provided the eggs and dairy were fed and what microbes exist in your environment and how thety hurt or aid flavor and rise time. like. You have to know how to account for the messy nature of reality and there is no formula for that. just repetition until you figure out the flow.
#like. idk man#i need recipes to be geo tagged because like.#here in the states our wheat has to be extremely cold hardy right? way more so than europes#it also needs to be able to handle like. tornadoes and other extreme weather you get that far inland on a flat plane#which means that compared to European flour ours has an insanely high glutin content bc glutin is how the plant strengthens itself#You need to account for that when cooking#more leavener more water less binder gentler kneading and longer rise time#so like. im brain dead exhausted but Yeah. baking very much isnt a science and your great grandma did just fine without a hyper accurate#gram scale being shilled by YouTubers.
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#just needed to vent for a sec but oh god am i tired of people#'friends' both irl and online got me fucked up lately#mental healths been in the shitter almost nonstop this year#familys always got me up the wall#i just feel like I'm constantly treading water and i am *tired*. like so fucking TIRED#it's never enough; it's too much; no not like that; but not that either; it's all wrong wRoNg WrOnG#ik im sleep deprived and possibly pms-y and that is most certainly not helping things rn but...#gods i see less and less of a reason to get out of bed and bother with anything ever again#wtf is the purpose#i can't keep friends to save my life bc im apparently a fuckin doormat and interesting as unflavored rice or smth#how hard is it to feel like you maybe sorta kinda matter and aren't an unlovable worthless piece of shit#years of therapy; trying meds; everything under the sun.... and nothing. lows and highs and dips of every kind and yet ..nothing#and maybe im just very much in my feelings rn and just yelling into the void.. but it hurts and im tired of pretending it doesn't.#i hate how hard it is to make friends as an adult especially irl. and how gossipy and cliquey and gross and mean ppl can be#of getting called childish and naive and boring for wanting to be a decent person and having interests outside of partying#(not attacking those traits but tired of getting attacked for *not* being 'fun' enough or 'social' enuf or 'sensitive' for having feelings)#enough*#i just want to go eat drywall and stand in the rain and let it help me pretend im not crying blood rn.#like every cell in my body isn't trying to spontaneously combust.#'it gets better' ..yeah? when. when i was 14? when i was 23? when im 37? when im 55? 82? WHEN.. bc im so sick and tired#and no this isn't me writing a final note or whatever it sounds like; i just wanted to word vomit bc ive never been good w sadness#and ive got such an overwhelming amount of it rn i can't even turn it into anger & spite & use that for productivity... i just want to rot#to lie down and be covered by plants as i sleep and just slowly fade into a cloud or smth like it's a ghibli movie or wtv.#im like shaking from how stupidly emotional i feel rn. the lack of empathy these days is fuckin astounding#common sense & empathy are lacking in absolutely droves these days. some days i hate the internet & tech for its irreparable damages sm#but here we are and here it shall remain. long after us; and *long* after us ..... *sigh*#anyway ima go try to take a nap or smth. I'll see ya when i see ya. take care my lovelies#if u read all this i prob owe you a cookie lol
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GUYS.
New dupe real! Also new pod????? Olivia is that you girlie speak to me
#rat rambles#oxygen not included#screenshots are from the steam page#there is ofc a Lot to unpack here gameplay wise and Im guessing some things will be tweaked design wise but Im lore pilled so.#anyways Im not sure how I feel abt this dupe's design but I will still welcome them with open arms hello#but more important here to me is the pod#because erm. thats a very very different looking pod.#I dont wanna jump to any conclusions or speculate too hard because chances are its just olivia getting new drip#but like. what if its not. what if this is like a new new printing pod#I assume that if it is a new pod then olivia will like be able to connect with it somehow but idk#because it rly depends on how ambitious theyd wanna be with this dlc given that to rly make a new pod thats super not olivia theyd have to#do a lot of work to make that change prevelant in the rest of the gameplay#now chances are if it is a new pod its one that doesn't have a human consciousness inside it#even if it was there rly arent many options for who it could be and no good options from a narrative standpoint#now this pod looks quite gutted so maybe it is just a normal printing pod that got kicked back online when olivia sent some guys to kick it#now heres the most negative thing Ill say abt these screenshots. the fox critters are rly ugly imo#I like the bunny guys tho WAUTWIATSWAUT WAIT#ARE THEY THE SAME SPECIES AS THE ANCIENT SPECIMEN SKELETON?#I dont think they line uo perfectly if I remember correctly but the big one has the same tusks and is also yknow big and fat like the#specimen is described to be in tbe story trait logs#Im willing to bet so much that theyre at least related in some way#maybe the one that was initially sent back in time was used as a basis for these guys or smth#my main reason for saying this is that I have to imagine these guys have to have some other purpose than being data storage#its seems that you can shave their coats which is probably the main thing but I imagine they probably drop a good amount of meat too#also important to note that they are grazers which is good to know#also I think the upside down plant is going to be this planet's muckroot equivalent#oh and for the fox deer I assume theyll be farmed for their antlers which will probably shed wood or smth#not a clue what the new plants will do but idrc#Ill care abt the gameplay after I get my new lore <3
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i need to be picked up and put in my home biome right the fuck now
#what do you mean i cant see a mountain from here#i read like eight papers today on human modification of landscapes specifically intentional burning#and i was like. jesus christ#i neeeeeeeed to be on the west coast again!!!#we do it different etc#im being tortured tantalus style by this list of native species of the central coast range!!!!!!!#stop mentioning places i live and native plants i know ill cryyyyyyyyy#robin wall kimmerer the ecology writer of allllll time you have changed how i think about place so much#i need to see a redwood or sequoia tree or ill throw up#(technically they are sequoias but whatev.)
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Compiled this lil piece from solar filter I used during the eclipse and plants I grabbed from my friend's parents' yard in Arkansas (they have those cool helicopter seeds we don't have around Florida)! Included Jupiter and Venus symbols on two handheld filters since those planets were very visible during the eclipse, and bits of a cyanotype I did the day before! So all the components are directly related to the eclipse/general area I viewed it from :-)
#my art#i don't actually usually post my actual art here bksndjd but I kinda busted my butt and thought this was a very cool thing I did !#text#eclipse#solar eclipse#the truth is out there#all of the inorganic materials are solar filter or cyanotype#(aside from glue lol)#the silver is the side that faces the sun - the black is what you look through!#and all the organic materials were from near eclipse path#i like the little red leaves which I grabbed bc I thought they looked cool but they ended up being neat as prominences too lol#anyway. inspo'd by exquisite creatures exhibit in crystal bridges AR bc the guy there uses bugs n plants n such in his art#also fuck leaves for use in art those little bitches fr . very annoying !#probs my fault in part bc I'm too impatient to book dry them tho... I rly wanted to get this Out Of Me y'know?#i put that dandelion together by hand lmaooo#like reattached the seeds to the head . so I could glue em on somewhat and keep em kinda more in place#than how they were attached naturally
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So you said Angel Crowley has a pet snake can we see it and how does fell the magnificent feel about them ( since snakes eat rabbits)
I do think Fell was scared of her at first, being a snake and all that- so she wasn't the only one, but got over it with time and with Dovely's help. But I think Crawley (the name of Dovely's snake ajdj) would have gotten so used to being with celestial beings that she's just there. being a good girl. No harm done ever
Also don't have the chance to properly doodle them atm but I wanted to do it anyway so have a very messy doodle I did with my finger on the notes app
#miniaskz#whimsy!omens#ahh hope this makes sense? i think the being the pet of a supernatural entity plays a big role here#like how crowley's plants can be seen tremble in fear since they're scared of him#so for Dovely i thought something similar but with a pet instead. so a pet that loves their owner#and doesn't behave like how they usually would in a situation like the one you described
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