When you really think about it, Daniel Molloy being a vampire is objectively terrifying. This is a guy who, as a mortal:
- Followed a stranger to a second location in peak serial killer era California.
- Was down to fuck in a coffin.
- Was down for fangs in his neck.
- Consistently interviewed dangerous or powerful people and was antagonistic to them.
- Literally never stopped when on the hunt for a story to the point it destroyed his personal life.
- Got on a plane in the middle of a pandemic with a degenerative disease because the guy he barely remembers following to some place on Divisadero, who he knows is an immortal killing machine, is offering Daniel his story and this also means Daniel could get some clarity on his fucked up memory.
- Has a big fucking mouth. He will just say fucking anything regardless of it being inappropriate.
- Has a fantastic bullshit radar.
- Beat a professional gaslighter at 3D chess.
...and then said powerful 514yo gaslighter gives this man litres of his, essentially, untouched blood and makes him his fledgling? Like...INSANE.
Daniel is, no doubt, EXTREMELY powerful and with a personality type that will probably make him a good vampire. Absolutely terrifying...and hot. God I hope he's still "sun challenged."
2K notes
·
View notes
if they made a homestuck movie:
VOICEOVER: it's coming...
*two drum beats*
JOHN EGBERT: *puts the disk for sburb into his computer* i'm in
VOICEOVER: this summer
*two drum beats*
ROSE LALONDE: *rolls eyes* john, stop goofing around
VOICEOVER: prepare to be stuck...
*two drum beats*
JADE HARLEY: *wakes up and looks around*
VOICEOVER: at home
*two drum beats*
DAVE STRIDER: *spins record* woah, this is off the wall, yo
*shitty orchestral cover of sburban jungle plays*
ROXY: but you don't understand! this game is dangerous!
*cut to dave leaving his clone behind at his quest bed*
DAVE: i can't do it... i just can't kill another me...
*bec noir appears next to alt dave*
ALT DAVE: he's right behind me isn't he
*fades to black as bec noir slashes a sword at alt dave's neck*
*text on screen reads "ASCEND"*
*cut to rose in her shed*
JOHN: rose, the meteor's gonna hit!!
ROSE: *grabs computer* *rolls eyes*
*text on screen reads "DESCEND"*
*cut to scenes of the war on the chess field*
*text on screen reads "RISE UP"*
*cut to john, running out of his kitchen*
JOHN: these imps are everywhere!!
*text on screen reads "ABSCOND"*
ROSE: it's all over...
*cut to the various sprites being sprited*
*cut to jake kissing dirk's head*
DIRK STRIDER: *standing nearby* *coughs* awkward...
*cut to terezi and john after game over*
TEREZI: john, 1t's 4ll up to you now...
JOHN: *gasps*
*cut to john and dave hugging*
NEPETA: *grins* :33< i ship ittttt
KARKAT: *facepalm*
*cut to terezi and vriska facing off*
TEREZI: vr1ska, you c4n't do th1s!
VRISKA: watch me!
*montage of vriska doing a bunch of random and cool stuff*
VRISKA: i can do anything!!!!!!!!
*cut to grimdark rose and dave*
ROSE: to win... we're gonna have to blow up the sun
DAVE: awww snap
*text on screen reads "NIC CAGE"*
JOHN: and i mean, of COURSE con air is the best movie ever!! what other movie would you even suggest
*text on screen reads "LIL NAS X"*
DAVE: man, this isn't even the best song in obama's whole rap career
*text on screen reads "AMANDLA STENBERG"*
ROSE: *rolls eyes* whatever, mom! i'm summoning cuthulu!
*text on screen reads "ZENDAYA"*
JADE: *petting bec* oh, who's the best dog! is it you?
*a bunch more celebrity names on screen*
*text on screen reads "BASED ON THE WEBCOMIC BY ANDREW HUSSIE"*
ANDREW HUSSIE: *sitting in chair* wait, am i still in this movie? do i still die?
VOICEOVER: yes
HUSSIE: oh poop
*text on screen reads "HOMESTUCK: THE MOVIE"*
JOHN: we're gonna save the world... or die trying
*quick montage of every single death scene*
DAVE: i think we're gonna die trying
JOHN: daaaaveeee
*text on screen reads "COMING THIS SUMMER"*
*cut to dave beatboxing*
KARKAT: CAN YOU SHUT UP?!
DAVE: are you gonna make me?
NEPETA: :33< ooooh—
DAVE and KARKAT in unison: DON'T SAY IT
NEPETA: :33< ship it
*they both sigh*
*cut to black*
2K notes
·
View notes