#*more importantly why did this happen?*
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Canon James Potter on hearing his name is linked to two ships in ao3’s top 20 ships for 2023 (no 8 and no 18):
Canon James Potter on hearing the most popular of the two is him & Sirius’ Deater baby brother Reggie:
#lol I’ve nothing against Jegulus#but I think canon James would be shook 🤣🤣🤣!#he’d be all listen#I had world saving sex#of course I’m mentioned twice in the top 20 list#😏😉😇#*preening* *strutting* *fussing with his hair* *repeatedly throwing and catching a stolen snitch*#WAIT WHAT ????!!#😱😬🧐😳#regulus??? as in Reggie I joined the Deaters at 18 and had a collage of Voldy on my bedroom wall Reggie?!?#*backs slowly out of the room*#*watching Sirius’ face*#*muttering expletives and words such as what the ever living fuck#*how did this happen??*#*more importantly why did this happen?*#*you’ll have to ask him I refuse to incriminate myself*#also *WHAAAAAAAAT?!?!?!?!*#Sirius Black: YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOU ENDED UP HAVING SEX WITH MY BABY BROTHER???? THE LESS ATTRACTIVE BLACK BROTHER??????!!!!!!!!!!#Reggie? the less good looking bro???#surely to fuck if you were going to fuck one of us it’s have to be me Merlin damn it man!!!!!#the Deaters are the Death Eaters (you had to be there#(involves the scarlet pimpernel)
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—TWINS THE SERIES · Episode 8
#twins bl#twins the series#ryan panya#frame ritchanon#spritefirst#firstsprite#twinsbledit#thai bl#thai drama#bl drama#bl series#i love this series but its pacing is way off#the triple take i did when there were suddenly big couple letters over their pushed together beds#when did that happen#more importantly why didn't we see it happen#them pushing together their beds would have been such a cute scene to see#and how the hell did they smuggle these letters past the other guys#does no one else ever visit their room#by pharawee
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Lovely writers of clone fics:
How do you handle the utter dumpster fire that is the GAR’s canon chain of command and overall structure? How do you even begin to write. I feel like I need to spend four weeks cleaning that mess up before I can even type a word of clone-centric fic. It’s astounding. It makes my eye twitch. I feel like if I even start the process of making it make sense, it will morph into its own project that I will be incapable of dropping.
#clone troopers#star wars#the clone wars#it is genuinely stopping me from writing#Because I feel like I need to fix it first#How did they let that happen#More importantly: why
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sharing some thoughts about deactivating here because it’s been difficult pondering idk.
#god i really really don’t want to do this. but i have to but i don’t want to but i have to but i don’t want to. and so on. you get the gist#though i guess i am more not wanting to let go of an idea or fantasy rather than reality#like i always wanted to be an active participant in fun oc art fandom writing etc etc communities#but all i really did was make way too many people uncomfortable with my worthless stuff.#like it and me are just not built for interacting with people lmao. especially when it comes to stuff like my characters or uh.#i don’t know you can’t call it art or writing just uh. creations i guess.#and like i knew that before i made this blog but then people started interacting with me and i thought hey maybe this’ll work out maybe i#can be better and then i so wasn’t. and for that i am very sorry.#(and i mean this is not the main reason why i feel like i have to do this but i can’t just go back like nothing happened on here lmao.#i deleted 90% of my shana posts i had/am having a crashout i gotta at least follow through after being so embarrassing#after being even more insufferable than usual haha. and if i stayed there would be even more people who feel obligated to stay around#i feel. and i so don’t want that. so just one more reason why i gotta be brave and just fucking do it.)#also i do realise that there’s the possibility of not deactivating and just logging off and leaving but every time i took a break like that#i always like felt a bit ‘better’/delusional & thought it’d be ok to return. sure that’ll happen again.which is why i have to be so drastic#like even if i made a new blog i know myself well enough to know that i’ll be too embarrassed to reach out to anyone again.#so it would really be a working solution to this problem. i really should just do it.#romeo’s wretched rambles#also a message to everyone telling me that they like shana and that he’s not a shit character to obsess over & more importantly share#with folks: appreciate the sentiment but there’s a lot of his evil you don’t know about.#i was implying some stuff here and there and some people i’ve told more privately but even they are missing like 25% of the shana.#those being the absolute worst parts of him. i am still absolutely obsessed with him but that’s my error to fix and i can’t subject#people to that anymore in good conscience. seeing people say they like him actively feels like i’m pulling a shana myself and deceiving#people with lies of omission sometimes. remember that lol. obviously ik that there r big differences but sometimes it just feels awful stil#so maybe he’s better contained in a separate private blog that i can torch once i get over this rot and just be done with this fucking char#again i don’t mean to say that i don’t appreciate the support but i’m sure many of your guys’ opinions would change If You Knew. you know.#(god. with the lies of omission thing. every day i learn more abt how i subconsciously write things that make me deeply uncomfortable lol)#(and that i fear. like. that wasn’t even intentional when i gave him that trait. i just realised that while typing this pointless mess lmao#anyways. thanks for readin if you made it this far. send me anon hate or something. hit me with an anvil and spit on my corpse if you will#i hope that at least by the end of this week i will have put my brave pants on and decided on what to do. sorry for being so annoying.
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me after i finished reading legendborn:
EXCUSE ME, TRACY DEONN, WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO PLUCK AT MY HEARTSTRINGS LIKE A FUCKING GUITAR PLAYER??
[gif credit: @shegos]
#WHy isn’t there more hype abt this book on tumblr!?#that was rhetorical don’t answer that. i KNOW why :/#legendborn#no thoughts head full. i want to say so much more!! but#my brain is full of love for bree & garbled kettle noises only atm <33#man… this book is so refreshing & sooo good i’m cryingggg 😭#no fr i did actually tear up at several scenes. miss deonn is an EXCELLENT writer#& gosh that ending…. phenomenal#i picked up this book knowing only that it was abt magic & knew nothing else. it surprised me in a very very pleasant manner#hands down the best book i’ve read this year so far#i mean it has secret societies; magic obviously; centres around a black girl; is a story abt grief; is inspired by the legend of arthur and#merlin; impeccably done research & i’m definitely forgetting smth but — what more could u want???#i kid u not i was at the edge of my seat near the end & kept having to come back bc i kept going over the words so fast. OH the intrigue!!#i was so curious as to how it would all pan out; & that’s not all - i felt butterflies in my stomach (FIRST TIME that’s ever happened :D)#also i was laughing while i was crying but most importantly- the paaaaaaaaain. sharp enough to pierce my heart#id in alt text
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it's been 15 years and I am still losing my mind at how there is a character in Anne Rice's The Witching Hour named Stuart Townsend and no one ever says anything about that
#when real-life stuart townsend signed up to play lestat... did he know.......#more importantly. why has he not disappeared under mysterious circumstances and reappeared briefly as a forbidding ghost#to make sure no one else made an anne rice film adaptation ever again#(that's totally analogous to what happened to book!stuart townsend right? right.)#(he should have showed up to scare away the people responsible for amc mayfair witches tbh.)#lives of the mayfair witches
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will say tho, since getting into exercising and watching fitness dudes talk about posture and various exercises n what they do for the body, my understanding of anatomy has gotten 10x better
and also like improved 10x faster than it ever did from doing still life practices n the such :p
#other#t talks#seeing n being told whats happening below the surface but especially Feeling has made drawing anatomy so much easier#like. just seeing a body do a pose can only do so much if you dont understand WHY its like that#or at least for me it only did so much#and more importantly seeing and Feeling how the muscles move and interact with each other#its like a giant moving puzzle
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Cornelius/Furnace/PC love triangle subplot is so funny to me because I view all these people as being too much of weirdos to express their feelings in a healthy manner if at all; so they're just all trying to play it cool while looking very uncool about it. thankfully they can be dense as bricks when they feel like it so the matter doesn't come to blows or anything, just unethical science.
#is it love is it friend drama is it work drama or what#regardless someone did get poisoned about it#honestly the fact that it was consensual puts this in an even stranger light#not pining for him but she'd rather believe he's dead than that he's stopped caring about her#not friends but she'd trust them with her actual literal heart and more importantly her worries regarding her incomprehensible future#not on speaking terms with her but he still holds on to the horrific yet lovingly crafted gift he made for her#they looked after her and baked her a 400 Echo cake when she was sick and never mentioned the cost. also hijacked a dirigible.#what the fuck is WRONG with you all#get therapy every last one of you#oh never mind there's no good therapists in the Neath#this is why this sort of shit happens there
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Every day I wake up and want to cry because there is something so comforting yet so unbelievably terrifying about a prequel series that includes characters we have seen in the future because we know that those characters will certainly survive, or at least survive the events we are witnessing in this context, but everybody else has their fate completely up in the air. Will they live? Will they die? Is their absence in the future timeline and inherent confirmation of their death, or will they be fine and is there a perfectly reasonable explanation for why they do not appear with the characters who we know will survive? And that constant hope, that persisting anxiety about their fate holds for their entire time onscreen because we know, we know that their future is not set in stone. So we're fighting against our better nature as the audience to convince ourselves that somehow the characters will survive even when it feels like we should already be grieving their loss. Anyways I'm doing fine mentally and have consumed a perfectly healthy amount of media why are you asking
#for your information this is in fact about star wars. because i am. hyperfixating#specifically commander cody/any rogue clones we meet and basically the entire cast of andor#because for cody we see rex in rebels; even better we literally see him with wolffe and gregor#which separately makes me so emotional cause they survived together dont you GET IT-#im good im fine. moving on#but we don't see cody#and rex even has a nightmare about him and calls out for him so WHAT IN THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN#CAUSE MY SPIDEY SENSE IS TELLING ME THAT MEANS CODY'S DEAD#WHICH OKAY. DEVASTATING. I WILL BE ON LEAVE FOR 4-6 BUISINESS WEEKS GRIEVING THIS NEWS.#but more importantly: HOW#HOW AND WHY IS HE GONE AND WHEN DID IT HAPPEN#did rex get to see him before he died? did cody die 3 years ago or 15?? there's a hell of a lot of time between episode 3 and 4 (/rebels)!#thats a full 19 YEARS of time#so WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED#AND WILL WE SEE IT HAPPEN IN THE BAD BATCH#BECAUSE CODY JUST WENT AWOL BUT IF HE DOESNT LIVE I WILL CRY REAL TEARS#also with andor this is a thing#cassians obviously alive and so is mon and saw and melshi is there too#but we dont see of hear about luthen one bit and bix nor any other characters are anywhere around in rogue one#so i just. want them to be okay so fucking badly#i am in a major mood can you tell :D#star wars#the clone wars#the bad batch#andor#rogue one#commander cody#luthen rael#cassian andor#andis thought geyser
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#halfway through m d z s vol 4 and now i really am convinced that most of this fandom have 0 reading comprehension skills#so much shit that's still being debated that is. directly in the text? it's not ambiguous at all?? like sorry did you just skip that entire#paragraph or smth how are these debates still happening#ik i bring this up on a regular basis but i went into the book after the drama and a lot of folks were like ooh jc isnt v likeable. like ??#this is literally making him MORE likeable and sympathetic than the drama. it's making l w j less. l w j is around during all these key#fucking moments and from the narration you can tell he understands whats happening and hates it but he doesnt fucking do anything??#and his sect atp is in a decent state. he isnt heir. but for some reason he only steps in when he 'can't take it anymore' WHY COULD HE#TAKE IT BEFORE THAT WHY DOES IT TAKE SO MUCH FOR HIM TO STEP IN#and ik this is. gonna come into play post timeskip but ffs it's so frustrating he's pissing me off so much every time he appears#meanwhile lmao that banquet scene where wwx barges in just before hes about to go to rescue the wen? yeah jc isnt even in llj then#one of the annoying debates is uwu why didnt jc stand up for them too. girl why didnt your fave who actually attended#anyway not just this but also like. it seems that an embarrassingly huge number of readers just. took the gossip at face value?#which i just. i cant. like the entire theme of this!! the huge ass theme! was about public perception!! i cannot understand how that#goes over ppls heads it's so in your face!! a large amount of events are retold through gossip youre supposed to question it all not only b#it's gossip but also bc stuff is contradictory a lot is clearly exaggerated AND MOST IMPORTANTLY bc you as reader have many moments#where the real events play out and you can SEE how the public perception gets skewed. honestly shoutout to folks who found the fandom after#finishing the novels i would feel like i was being gaslit by everyone from the shit they say happened/is stated in the books#ugh had to get this off my chest. maybe ill spite finish a fic with this energy
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Arcane women accidentally confessing to you. | Sevika, Jinx, Caitlyn, Vi x Gn!Reader



This is very self-indulgent, so enjoy.<3
Content: pre-season 2 because I want to be happy rn, slight angst if you squint, fluff, accidental confessions, maybe ooc??, cursing, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns!
((Not proofread))

》SEVIKA
She was resting at the last drop with you during some downtime in between missions. One hand lingered on your hip whilst her metallic one held onto her cigar, eyes focused on the pocker game she was playing with a couple of Silco's other henchmen. She always kept you close this way, a clear sign of who you belonged to despite never having said a word about it yet. It was a mutual understanding only you could have, and so she didn't think a confession was necessary.
Until today, it seemed.
You were secretly helping her cheat a little and eventually told her the winning move, which earned her a large sum of money. Letting out a smug laugh at everyone's angered and defeated glares, she gave you a lazy grin. "Thanks, sweetheart. This is why I love you." She hummed to you, smoke exhaling from her dark lips, before she froze ever so slightly. Well, it shouldn't be that much of a surprise to either of you, and yet she couldn't help but chuckle at your own stunned face.
Looking at the men around her, she threw some poker chips towards them, clearly asking for another round. She wasn't the type to get flustered or shy anyways, so her moving on like nothing happened was on brand.
The only acknowledgment you got, however, was the hand on your hip tightening.
》JINX
She has a hard time hiding her feelings for you due to her rather energetic and extremely clingy nature. But there is still a clear distance between you two that she's too scared to cross. It was a deep fear of ruining everything she had with you in case her confession went wrong. She'd rather you consider her your best friend for life if it meant for you to stay at her side. She didn't want to lose more people after all. And yet, as fate has it, she eventually lost herself in a good and happy moment with you.
You were tinkering on some projects in her hideout whilst listening to music. Her head was leaning against your shoulder as her eyes traced your focused gaze. Jinx felt so content and at peace in that moment that she couldn't stop the words that spilled out of her mouth. "I love you." It took her a second to realise what happened, and her body was quick to flinch away from you. You kept her in place, however, with a free hand placed against her head. "Hey, it's okay. I love you too. I'm not leaving." You reassured her quickly with a smile, one that made her heart skip a beat.
She may not see herself as deserving of you, but she's glad to have you at her side anyway. Hopefully forever.
》CAITLYN
Caitlyn was good at hiding her emotions from you. In fact, she had refused to tell you in fear of breaking the professionalism you two had and, most importantly, your friendship that she cherished deeply. And so, she was very careful not to reveal a single thing... until her confidence betrayed her and caused her to slip up.
You two were reviewing a new case together, and whilst she wasn't paying attention, she accidentally slid you her diary over. It unfortunately looked too similar to her work notebook, something she only realised the moment you opened it and froze in surprise. She may have scribbled your name all over it. She may have childishly drawn hearts around your name. She may have made it awfully clear that she loved you. And it made her wonder if there was a god out there that hated her deeply.
"... My apologies. Please ignore that-" "-Haha, I'm so relieved that I'm not the only one who did this!" You let out a soft laugh before pulling out your notebook and showing her similar pages to her own, just with her name written all over them. Her face was flushed from how flustered and embarrassed she was, but alas, she too couldn't help and chuckle at how silly this all was. At least you felt the same.
》VI
It's not like she didn't want to confess her feelings to you. She just didn't know how! Her confession should sweep you right off your feet in her mind, and yet nothing she came up with seemed good enough. Vi hoped that her flirting would get the point across, but she lacked the confidence to go any further than compliments. She just didn't want you to think differently of her and therefore kept her distance for the most part regarding the subject. That is if she could keep it in for lobger than she already has. She always felt so strongly about others, after all.
So, during a little hang out session in a bar somewhere in Zaun, she attempted to find the courage to tell you how she felt. Whilst she went off to go and get you a drink first, however, a drunken man showed up at your side and started flirting you in a rather uncomfortable way. You tried making it clear that you weren't interested, but as he went to grab your arm, a hand slammed in between you two onto the bar table. "Hey, I think they told you no, asshole." "Who the hell are you?" The man barked back, yet Vi didn't back down and simply blocked you from his view with her body. "I'm their girlfriend, now fuck off." She hissed, and the man just rolled his eyes before walking off grumbling.
Silence filled the space in between you two until you chuckled softly. "Girlfriend, huh? I like the sound of that." You hummed, secretly trying to ease her embarrassed mind, that quickly recovered at your words with a sly grin. "You do?" You mirrored her smile with a nod. "Very much so. I'm glad we think alike."

#arcane#arcane x y/n#arcane x reader#arcane sevika#arcane sevika x reader#sevika#sevika x reader#arcane jinx#arcane jinx x reader#jinx#jinx x reader#arcane vi#arcane vi x reader#vi#vi x reader#arcane caitlyn#arcane caitlyn x reader#caitlyn#caitlyn x reader#arcane x you
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sometimes I think about kokichi. when I don't think about kokichi, I think about nagito. when I don't think about either of them IM HAVING DREAMS ABOUT POURING SAND IN MY EYES
I WISH I WAS MAKING THIS SHIT UP LAST TIME I DIDN'T HAVE A DREAM WITH ONE OF THEM IN IT THE DREAM THE DREAM WAS ABOUT ME POURING SAND IN MY EYES
#dreams#weird dreams#sand#why did i pour sand in my eyes and more importantly why is that what happens when Kokichi isnt in my dreams#send help lmao#wait no#SAND help lmao
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the alchemy
Mob!Bucky x Reader
Run-through: About a decade ago you left your home and ran away, looking for a fresh start after having had your heart broken by the boy you loved. Now you’re back and turns out Bucky Barnes – the same man who once broke your heart – is adamant on tormenting you some more. But why? Why does he want you back at all cost when he was the one who once pushed you away and crushed your heart like it meant nothing to him? What secrets has he been keeping for almost a decade? Most importantly, what truly happened that night he broke your heart?
Themes: forced marriage/marriage of convenience, angst, mob!bucky, metal arm, fluff, smut, possessive!bucky, childhood friends-to-enemies-to-lovers trope, bratty!reader, mentions of violence, explicit language, slow burn-ish, HEA
a/n: new mob!bucky pics dropped–

“I do.” You said in a sombre voice, with blood dripping from the cut on your lip as you sealed your fate and married your worst enemy.
Bucky’s face was bleeding too, your nails had done some damage earlier when you both got into a physical altercation like wild animals. You nearly smirked when you realised he looked worse than you did.
Then again you both looked like you went through hell as you stood here, at this makeshift altar, in the middle of what used to be the foyer of your father’s mansion before Bucky and his men shot at it until it was nothing but rubble, broken glass, and cracked marble.
Messy hair. Cuts and bruises all over your bodies. Dishevelled clothes. Your white jumpsuit had your own bloodstains on it, and his all black suit was torn in certain places. But he looked every bit the man they say he is. Dangerous. Cold, dark presence. The large bruise on his jaw was beginning to get darker now, thanks to the many punches from you. His near shoulder length hair was surprisingly looking neat. It pissed you off.
You looked like a mess too. And for a brief second, as his blue eyes looked down at your throat, you knew he could see a matching bruise forming around your neck from when he’d pinned you down to the floor earlier with that damned metal arm.
No one was dead, none of your people and none of his. Thankfully. But right now, as you married the man standing in front of you, you felt dead inside.
“You may now kiss the bride.” Was all you heard and you remained still as Bucky grabbed you by the waist and pulled you into him.
You resisted for a moment, but then he pulled you harder until your chests collided and you had no choice but to remain pressed against him. “I’m tired of these games, princess.” He hissed in a lowered voice, looking down at you with his merciless blue eyes.
You stared back at him with equal contempt. “You’re gonna regret this, Barnes.” You sneered, in a hushed voice. Not that the injured family members and men surrounding you – both his men and your father’s guards who stood and watched the show in disbelief and shock would mind the disrespect for each other in both your tones – but you didn’t want to add to the ridiculousness of this situation.
“Oh?” He taunted with a faint smirk. Only then did you notice the small cut on his upper lip. It brought you a little solace. “You’re my wife now, you will do as I say.”
The bitterness in your tone matched his as you said, “We’ll see about that, husband.”
You could tell he’d accepted the unspoken challenge, and he would do anything to win. After all, everything was a game to Bucky Barnes. He didn’t care who he used, who he manipulated, or who he tossed aside. He paraded around like he owned this world and everything and everyone in it.
Bucky scoffed then leaned in to kiss you, hard. It wasn’t a loving kiss in any way. It was possessive though. Like he was putting on a show for whoever was watching, making sure everyone in this dilapidated room understood that you were his now.
You kissed him back, angrily. You despised him. Your entire family did. But they couldn’t save you this time. Bucky’s attack was unexpected. Your guards were unprepared. You were the last line of defence and this… union was necessary. You had to offer something, anything. Otherwise Bucky and his guys threatened to burn down your half of the city and turned it to ash immediately.
But it wasn’t always like this. Your families used to be allies. You actually grew up with Bucky, he tolerated you enough back then and you had always had a crush on him.
Then that night happened almost a decade ago…
It was your twentieth birthday party, and your father made an announcement which you were not ready for.
He announced to the ballroom filled with important people that you were to marry Bucky, and that both families were beyond happy to transform their friendship into something more solid through this alliance.
You remained frozen in place for long minutes after that announcement was made, even though your heart raced like never before. No one had told you about this, but judging by the way your family hugged and congratulated Bucky’s family you understood that this was all planned.
You kept that smile on your face though, as people walked over to congratulate you. You looked around and tried to find Bucky in the crowd to see if he knew about this but he was nowhere to be found.
You were certain he was here just a moment ago, leaning against one of the pillars and brooding as always. And he’d just disappeared.
The announcement made your heart flutter incessantly. After all, you’d always had a huge crush on Bucky. How could you not? He was the boy you grew up around, he had pretty eyes and nice hair. Sure he was broody and rarely ever smiled but you liked how it suited his bad boy personality. And your young heart was weak for the handsome boy with tattoos and blue eyes.
After people were done congratulating you, you discretely walked out of the party and decided to look around and try to find Bucky. You hated how giddy you were. Sure, Bucky was broody and rarely ever laughed. He spent his entire time glaring at you then getting jealous when you talked to other guys. But you had liked him since forever.
You looked all over your father’s mansion. Bucky was nowhere to be found indoors. So… maybe the pool area outside? You started walking in that direction, feeling like a princess in your white ball gown as you walked down an empty hallway, a faint smile on your face as you looked for the man you were meant to marry soon.
Maybe Bucky knew about this announcement. Maybe he was okay with it. Maybe this would be your fairytale in real life, you thought. Maybe you’d melt his frozen heart and everything would be perfect. Maybe he liked you back all along and you just never knew!
“...marry her?”
Your smile vanished as you stopped right before you stepped outside onto the patio. Was that Bucky’s voice? Was he talking to someone? You quietly stepped closer, hiding behind the plants as you tried your hardest to listen to what he was saying.
You could see him, standing on the black tiles by the pool. He had his back to you, and he held a phone to his ear. His broad shoulders and lean waist accentuated by how well that black suit moulded to his muscular body. You watched as he ran his fingers through his short black hair in frustration.
Who was he talking to?
“No!” He barked at the phone. “Did you not listen to what I just said? I don’t want to do this!” He yelled, not bothering that anyone around might hear him. “I tried to talk them out of it! This is so fucking stupid!”
You blinked in surprise, unable to process what you were hearing.
“I don’t care what I have to do, but I will not marry her.” He said with enough venomous certitude that a silent tear fell down your face.
All your previous delusions turned to nothing but heavy disappointment. It made you feel stupid. This gown felt stupid. The diamonds around your neck, around your wrists and in your hair felt stupid. How stupid of you to think this was all going to end well? How stupid of you to think your childhood crush actually meant something? How stupid of you to think that there was a chance he liked you back? Of course he didn’t. He wouldn’t have ignored you for years if he did.
You couldn’t stop the sudden sob that escaped your mouth. Afraid that he might have heard, you took a few steps back and hid behind a nearby, tall potted shrub.
Things were quiet for a moment or two. You heard him whispering so quietly you couldn’t make out what he said. Your face burned in embarrassment at the thought of him finding you here. You already felt stupid and childish, you didn’t want to get caught eavesdropping in this situation.
But then he resumed talking on the phone. You couldn’t risk moving to look at him so you remained hiding, and listened. Your heart broke with each word that left his mouth.
“And she’s so blind she doesn’t even see it.” He hissed, louder this time. “I barely tolerate her. Her whiny, and bratty attitude. I mean she’s a grown woman and still acts like she’s daddy’s little princess.” He scoffed. “You should’ve seen her today, she looks like a kid’s toy with that ridiculous dress on.”
More tears streamed down your face as you heard nothing but distaste and irritation in his voice. This was the boy you had a hopeless crush on? This is what he thought of you?
You didn’t need to hear more. This was more than enough to completely break you so you turned around and quietly walked back down the same hallway. You wiped your tears, and put a fake smile on as you went back to your party. This time with a plan in your head.
You endured the party with a heavy heart. Faked some more smiles until it ended. You didn’t see Bucky again for the rest of the night, which was good. By the early hours of the morning, everyone had left. You wandered around that empty ballroom like a ghost that night. For hours. Thinking, plotting. It was clear Bucky didn’t want this. And now neither did you. But your families had announced it. So what exactly could you do?
By the time the sun rose, you had already written a note to your father and left it on his desk. By the time the sky brightened, your bags were packed and you were already driving out of the mansion grounds. And you knew that by the time your father would go into his office and find that note, you would already be on a plane, on your way out of here.
You didn’t give too many details in the note. You simply said that you were leaving, not knowing when or if you’d be back.
Truth was, you had no solid plans. All you knew was that you needed to get away from home.
You didn’t know that when you’d return home – almost a decade later, so much would have changed.
Your father was angry. Livid actually, that you’d been away for years without contact. You briefly explained why you needed to leave. And how you’d been able to make a name for yourself elsewhere. But after he was done berating you for what you did when you were twenty and stupid, he filled you in on all that you’d missed in the past decade almost.
Some important points were: your family and Bucky were no longer allies, but were now each others’ worst rivals but no one knew that. The city was now secretly divided – your family ruled and controlled one side, and Bucky ruled the other.
“It’s just him now?” You had asked, and your father nodded.
“A lot happened after you left, actually–”
A loud noise cut him off. Rounds of bullets shot at the windows of the house, from all sides it seemed. And it was pure chaos. You could hear your guards fighting back, but even by just hearing the commotion you could tell you were severely outnumbered.
But whoever it was, they weren’t shooting at anyone, just at windows – making enough noise to get your attention and to get you to come outside.
You marched out of the room despite your father ordering you not to. And you were halfway down the grand stairs when he walked in and spotted you immediately with a smug look on his face.
Bucky. Walked in like he owned the place. He stopped in the middle of the foyer, which was now ruined. Bits and pieces of concrete and glass all over the marble floor. Flower pots destroyed, the gilded mirror in pieces as well. He made a mess of the home you grew up in and you almost shot him right in the heart there and then.
Here was the man who once broke your heart after making you think for years that maybe you had a chance.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” You hissed. You could hear your father coming to a stop on the landing several steps behind you. He was unprepared. You were armed with only one handgun tucked into your pocket. Your guards were outnumbered. This was a shitshow.
The guards – his and yours – stopped firing and now just stood all over the place on high alert. And you knew, deep down in your gut you just knew something which you weren’t ready for was about to happen.
“I see you’re finally home, princess.” Bucky just gave you a cold smile and shoved his hands in his pockets. The action drew your attention to one specific thing. The metal arm. You frowned at it in confusion, but didn’t react.
But that word… ‘princess’ brought back memories which chased you out of this place. And it only fueled your anger.
“What the fuck do you want?”
He lifted his nose slightly in the air, like the arrogant prick he had always been. “I’m here to collect what I was promised.” His voice was strong and confident. “A bride. Now you have a choice, princess. Either we do this in peace and no one gets hurt, or…”
He didn’t even have to finish his sentence because on cue, one of his guards sneakily appeared on the landing behind you, holding a gun to your father’s head. You froze for a moment. The look on your father’s face made everything so serious all of a sudden. You had to be extra careful here.
“You wouldn’t.”
He scoffed, “Wouldn’t I?”
You argued, “It’s been almost a decade.”
“I don’t care. We were supposed to marry each other–,”
You cut him off, “Yes, and you didn’t want that, did you? I heard you on the phone that night.” You finally confessed. “By the pool. I remember every single word that came out of your fucking mouth. So don’t come here acting like you’re entitled to–,”
“You think you know everything, don’t you?” He smirked, shaking his head. “Is that why you ran away? And didn’t come home for a decade? Because you spied on me that night and didn’t like what you heard?”
That did it. One moment you were standing on the stairs, afraid that your father might get hurt and the next you had your gun out and shot right at his metal arm, knowing it wouldn’t hurt him but it would make him lower his guard for just a second.
And that one second was enough to jump him and punch him right in the jaw. Fuck, it hurt but it also felt so damn good. All those years you’d been away, you were also training in your free time. And you knew you were good at combat.
But so was he. A few punches in and he managed to throw you down on the floor and pin you to the ground with that same metal hand around your throat, keeping you in place. You didn’t know why his guards just stood and did nothing, as though they had been ordered not to shoot at anyone here.
But you weren’t under any such orders, so you managed to land another punch to his jaw before he yelled, “Enough!” Right in your face. “Stop this shit, or I swear to–,”
You cut him off by punching him again, trying to get free the moment you felt his metal hand get loose around your throat. He growled in annoyance and tightened his grip.
“You’re like a wild fucking animal. Stop!”
You gritted your teeth at the insult and scratched his face exactly like how a wild animal would. You tried everything, tried to punch him again, tried to scratch down his neck and arms which only tore his shirt instead of his skin. You went for yet another punch and only then did you feel another pair of arms – one of his guards – pulling your hands away from his face. You thrashed and tried your hardest to break free but you couldn’t and ended up biting your own lip rather badly in the process.
“I fucking hate you, Bucky Barnes!” You hissed, defeated, and now with a bleeding, throbbing cut on your lip which matched his.
Bucky kept his hand around your neck as he leaned in menacingly and whispered, “Hate me all you want, princess. But you will marry me. Right here. Right now.”
And that’s how you found yourself kissing your husband, in the foyer of your father’s ruined mansion. With your helpless father, and the many guards as witnesses.
You pulled away from the kiss, breathless and angrier than earlier. Jaws clenched, you were ready to tackle him to the ground again, maybe actually shoot him with your gun this time, but he spoke before you could say anything.
“Let’s go.” He spoke, and like the loyal followers that they were, all of his guards silently walked out of your house. And Bucky grabbed your hand firmly in his and began pulling you out of the house as well.
You resisted again. “Wait! You brute!” You pulled your hand away from his and ran back up the stairs to your father. “I ruined everything, I’m sorry.”
He just hugged you and told you to be careful and be smart. And that he forgives you. You promised you’d come to see him soon. And then you left, refusing to take Bucky’s hand again as you walked out of your father’s house.
You needed to think. You couldn’t fight him right now. Besides, it’s not like you married him legally. All Bucky wanted was to make a scene and you let him. For now. You’d need some time to come up with a plan and decide what needed to be done. But for now…
“If you’re thinking about running away and disappearing for a decade again, you better stop. You’re not getting away this time. You hear me?” Bucky spoke, sitting next to you in the backseat of his car as the driver drove to his side of the city, to his house surely. That authoritative tone of his made you want to scratch his face again.
“You seem to be under the impression that you’re in control here, Barnes. Just know, I could still shoot you right now if I wanted to.” You didn’t look at him, you looked out the window. At the city that had changed in your absence.
“Ouch.” He faked his surprise. Then proceeded to put his arm around your shoulders to pull you into his chest, leaning down he whispered into your ear, “That’s not a nice way of treating your new husband, now is it?”
You gave him a fake smile, ignoring the way your brain thought he smelled delicious, and reached into your pocket to pull out your handgun. Placing the cold barrel right under his chin you said, “Try me, husband.”
The driver cleared his throat in nervousness and you didn’t want to traumatise the man so you pulled your gun away but left it in Bucky’s line of sight. He pulled away then, pulling his hand away from your shoulders but placed his metal hand on your thigh. A possessive move.
Yet that didn’t bother as much. But the metal hand? Where did that come from? What happened while you were gone?
He answered your questions voluntarily. “Got caught in a crossfire. I got shot too many times, the arm was beyond saving. So I had the metal arm made. It’s a very intricate technology, but it works just fine.” He said, flexing the hand on your skin.
You didn’t miss the hidden sexual connotation in that last part of his sentence. And you certainly couldn’t ignore the way your body responded to the cold, metal touch. It looked… badass. Not that you would ever tell him.
You tried to look out the window again, but his touch on your thigh was more distracting than you wanted it to be. It was all you could focus on. Just to stop thinking about it you said, “I don’t have any of my things.”
“It’s all been taken care of. Don’t worry.” He answered, looking down at his phone. Acting like he didn’t know his hand on your thigh was messing you up.
Still you frowned at his answer, “What do you mean it’s been taken care of?” Then you paused and thought about it for a moment, “Did you–” You sighed, “You knew I was coming, didn’t you? Did you have people spying on me?”
He shrugged, “You thought I would let my betrothed be out there in the world without keeping an eye on her?” He scoffed, looking up from his phone for a brief moment, “Of course I did. I know everything about you. I even know all about that secret, women-only army you created.” He added, “I was half expecting them to pop out of nowhere earlier at your father’s house.”
You were in disbelief. This whole time you thought you’d hid well. But no.
“Where are they anyway? Your girls?” He asked, and for once it didn’t sound like a taunt. It sounded like he was genuinely curious.
“Probably out hunting and beheading men who think they can get away with forcing women into marrying them by threatening to kill their fathers.” You gave him another one of your fake smiles, “I’ve trained them well.”
Bucky smiled back. “Well good. When they get here to try and free you, we could unite our forces. We’ll be untouchable then, you and I. I have the money and you have an army.” He winked. “Ultimate power couple.”
“You won’t get away with this, Barnes.”
He looked out of the window and said, “I just came to collect what was promised to be mine that night.”
You argued, bitterly, “Oh we both know what happened that night.”
“I do.” He said, “But do you? Do you really?”
You remained quiet for a moment. This was the second time he questioned your knowledge of what truly happened that night. As if you hadn’t heard him loud and clear on that phone call.
“You–,”
He cut you off and looked out the window as he said, “We’re home.”
It had been a long day. And you were running out of energy so instead of arguing some more, you just followed him out of the car and remained stunned for a moment as you looked at his house. It wasn’t his family home. This one seemed new.
It was just as large as your father’s mansion, just a lot more contemporary compared to the more Georgian architecture-inspired one you grew up in.
Bucky’s house sat on a sprawling green and pristine property. It was a perfect blend of sleek architecture and a glass house, which allowed the right amount of privacy but also allowed glimpses of the warm, farmhouse inspired interior. Even from outside you could tell it was homey and bright inside.
Before you could get a word out, you felt his hands on you again. You tensed up and almost hit him again in defence but before you could, Bucky was carrying you bridal style – literally – and marching towards the large doors of his ridiculously pretty home.
“What the fuck are you doing?” You questioned, squirming just a little in the intimate embrace.
“Traditions,” He said, looking down at you, “Can’t have you trip at the doorstep and risk bringing bad luck into our marriage.”
You frowned at him, reluctantly wrapping your arms around his neck for support. “You say ‘our marriage’ like it’s gonna be a real thing. It won’t, Barnes. I’ll be out of here before you–,”
He used you to push open the door and the warm interior of the home shut you up. For some reason you never imagined someone like Bucky would live in a house that actually looked like a home. You pictured him living in some villain’s lair.
But this was… beautiful.
You squirmed into his arms until he finally set you down carefully. You stood there for a minute, in the foyer, just looking around. Then you couldn’t help but say, “It would be a real pain if someone just started shooting at the windows of your house like a madman, wouldn’t it?” You waved your gun in front of his face.
“I’ll send people over tomorrow morning to fix your father’s house.”
“You don’t even sound apologetic.” You scoffed.
“I’m not.”
You narrowed your eyes at him. “Was it necessary? To shoot at my house like that? You couldn’t just, I don’t know, ring the doorbell to get me to come outside? You absolutely had to be a child?”
He smirked then said, “First of all, that isn’t your house anymore. This is where you live now, and you will call this your home. Second of all, why blame me when you acted just as childish when you decided to run away all those years ago? Third of all, I did it because, well, I do like some drama.”
You couldn’t not believe him. “You amaze me with your stupidity, Barnes.”
“You amaze me with your bratty attitude, Mrs. Barnes.”
You stepped closer to him, slow and in a threatening manner. “Don’t call me that.”
“Don’t call me that.”
You sighed, “You know you’re still that little boy who used to bully everyone when we played as kids.”
He clarified, “No, I bullied you because you were annoying. Everyone else was fine.”
“I hate you.” You said with enough hostility you hoped it would shut him up.
It didn’t. “Well, see.” He took your hand in his and said slowly as if talking you down, “That’s something we’ll work on together as a couple.”
You pulled your hand away and were so tempted to just–
“Come,” he said, “I’ll show you where our room is.” You began protesting immediately but he cut you off by saying, “Stop being fucking difficult. We’re married now, act like it.”
“I want a separate room!”
“No.”
“I’m not sleeping with you!”
“Then don’t. But you will sleep in my bed. Like my wife should.”
“You’re a fucking animal!” You tried tugging your hand free from his grasp.
Bucky had had enough. So he pinned you to the nearest surface, which happened to be the closed door of his bedroom. He grabbed both your wrists in his metal hand and pinned them above your head. His face was just inches away from yours, and he stared deep into your eyes.
Your mind immediately went to that harsh kiss you’d shared earlier. And you hated how your body squirmed just as the thought of it. You refused to think about it any more, but his mouth was just so, so close. The cut on his lip, the slight stubble on his cheek and around his mouth, the texture of his skin, you were picking up on details you’d missed.
Bucky spoke in a calm, deep voice which sent shivers down your spine. “Let’s be adults here, okay? You stop acting like a brat, and I’ll stop treating you like one.” He said, pressing his chest into yours. “It’s been a long day, and I know you’re running out of energy as well so stop resisting me. If I was an animal, I would’ve dragged you to bed right now and would’ve made you mine in every sense of the word.” He whispered, his voice cold and dangerous. “But I’m not. So you will walk into this room, and head straight for a warm shower and after you’re done we’re gonna clean these wounds. Am I clear?”
You nodded quickly, like an idiot entranced by his gorgeous voice.
“Use your words, princess. Am I clear?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Let’s go.”
—
You leaned against the counter, wrapped in a fluffy robe and another towel wrapped around your wet hair, and Bucky was cleaning the cut on your lip.
His wounds were all cleaned. It looked like he had used a different shower while you were in here. His long hair was damp and tied into a small bun, with strands of his dark hair falling on either side of his face. He had changed into a tight black t-shirt and PJ trousers. It was frustrating to look at him. Because he looked so damn good.
Last time you’d seen him was when he was a twenty year old boy. He’d changed since. He seemed taller somehow. Or maybe it was just the muscles making him look bigger.
You couldn’t look away from the metal arm. And the intricate details on it.
“Are you hurt anywhere else?” He asked, throwing the used cotton balls and napkins in the trash can.
You didn’t miss the way he was being gentle all of a sudden. Calm voice, calm movement. Very different from the man who’d forced you to marry him just hours ago.
“No.” You answered, turning around to look in the mirror. The bruise on your neck was very much visible now. You didn’t notice Bucky approaching you again, you didn’t notice how close he got, not until he reached out and touched your neck with his warm fingers.
And for the first time, he sounded genuine when he said, “I’m sorry. About that.”
You met his eyes through the mirror and remained quiet for a moment. For a brief moment you thought back to that night. What if you hadn’t heard him on the phone? What if you had married him back then? Would this be a normal, daily thing? Sharing a bathroom, a bed?
“I punched you. Multiple times. This makes us equal.”
Bucky scoffed, then nodded. Then said, “Come to bed when you’re done.” And left you alone in the bathroom.
Shit. You stared at yourself in the mirror. What a day. All you wanted was to pay your father a visit and maybe spend some days at home and then fly back to where you came from. Having your father’s house be attacked, getting married, and having to share a bedroom with the man who once broke your heart… yeah, all that wasn’t in the plan.
You changed into some comfy PJs Bucky had brought you earlier and walked out into the bedroom. You found Bucky on his phone again, standing by the foot of the bed.
“Which side do you sleep on?” He asked, not looking up from his phone.
“Uh, right.” You answered, because for some reason now he felt the need to ask for your opinion.
Bucky didn’t say a word as he moved to the left side of the bed and peeled back the covers before getting in. Like this was just another day. Like this was normal. You awkwardly walked to your side of the bed and just stood there for a moment.
“Just get in bed. I won’t touch you.”
He didn’t even look at you as he spoke and, well, the lack of attention from him bothered you. Oh what the hell. You pulled the covers and got under them. You curled onto your side, with your back facing him.
Soon, you heard him click something and all the lights turned off. You sensed movement behind you but that was it. He didn’t touch you. In fact, there was so much distance between you two that your back felt cold. And now that annoyed you as well.
You couldn’t sleep.
An hour went by, you still couldn’t sleep.
Another hour went by, and now you’d begun tossing and turning so much that you heard Bucky groaning.
“Will you stop that?”
“I can’t sleep.” You mumbled.
“Don’t make it my problem. Stop moving.”
“Wow. Some husband you are.”
Silence. Then you felt your body sliding across the bed as Bucky wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you into his warm chest.
“What the–,”
“Shh.” He cut you off, his warm breath tickling your cheek as he spooned you from behind. “It’s cold. We could both use the warmth. Now go to sleep.”
You scoffed, but didn’t move. “Your fancy house doesn’t have a thermostat? Fix the temperature.”
“I like this better.”
“I better not find your hands wandering.”
You moved around for a bit, finding a comfortable spot. Then you moved some more and Bucky tightened his arm around you and whispered into your ear, “Stop wiggling against my cock. I understand it’s our wedding night and all but I’m too tired to do anything.”
Your face burned in embarrassment. You tried to put some distance between your bodies, even though you liked his body heat, but thankfully Bucky pulled you right back.
“Did I say you can move?” He chided.
“What now, I need your permission to get comfortable in bed?”
“Brat.”
“Asshole.”
—
You didn’t know when you fell asleep at night. But the heat from Bucky’s chest definitely helped. It must’ve been that. And in the middle of the night, you must’ve searched for more heat. That was probably the only reason why you woke up and found yourself sprawled all over him, face into the crook of his neck and both your hands under his shirt, legs tangled with his.
“You call me an animal. But look at you. Touching me while I was sleeping.” He mumbled. “Shameless.”
You pulled away so fast, but then regretted it. Because now you missed his warmth. You shivered even under the covers. “Would it kill you to keep your damn house a little warmer?”
He just yawned and got out of bed. “Get ready.” He said, “We might have a guest coming over. And you have to be a good little wife and play host.”
“Fuck you.”
“Oh you will.” He teased, “Soon.” Then he winked and walked out of the room.
Well, he at least was giving you some privacy and let you have this bathroom all to yourself. Screw his and his mind games. First he barges into your house, forces you to marry him, then cuddles you to sleep.
You caught yourself frowning multiple times while you showered, did some skin care, and found the closet on the other side of the room. You weren’t even surprised when you found a whole section filled with all you could need. All the shoes seemed like they would fit you, all the outfits as well.
Nothing fazed you anymore. Not even the fact that your new husband might be a bit of a stalker. How else would he know your underwear size!? And there were drawers full of them.
You tried not to worry too much as you got dressed. You were gonna get out of here soon anyway.
Once dressed and ready for the day, you got downstairs and immediately heard Bucky’s voice, along with another voice. They were laughing over something. You found out where they were and approached the high-ceilinged, charming, farmhouse-inspired kitchen which blended with a spacious, cosy dining area.
The other man had his back to you, but you knew that voice. Even though you hadn’t heard it in years.
“Sam?” You couldn’t help but call out, lingering by the large doorway. Bucky remained leaning against the kitchen counter with a coffee mug in his hand, while Sam got up from where he sat at the breakfast counter.
He turned around and his familiar, warm brown eyes met yours. He gave you a comforting smile. You, Sam, and Bucky all grew up together, along with some other kids from families similar to yours. And Sam had always been a sweetheart. You’d missed him.
So you didn’t even hesitate to walk right into his arms once he opened them, wanting a hug. You squeezed him tight and said, “I thought I’d never see you again, Sammy!”
Sam hugged you back just as tight, “I can’t believe I haven’t seen you in almost a decade.” He pulled away to look down at you before giving you a loud kiss on the cheek. Safe to say, he was just as handsome as he was when you left this place. “How have you been?”
You looked over Sam’s broad shoulder and found a broody Bucky. “I’ve been better.”
Sam got really serious, and was about to say something but Bucky’s voice rumbled from behind. “That’s enough hugging and smooching. Sam, stop touching my wife.”
“Ooh, your wife.” Sam teased, before letting go of you and letting you walk out of his arms. “First of all, why didn’t you tell me you two were planning to get married this whole time?” He asked Bucky in an accusatory tone. “My childhood friends got married and I wasn’t even invited.”
Sam sat back down at the breakfast counter, so he didn’t see the questioning stare you sent Bucky. So Sam wasn’t aware of the circumstances under which you got married? Of course he didn’t. Nobody knew, and Bucky wasn’t about to tell anyone
“It all happened so quickly, Sam.” You placed a gentle hand on his shoulder as you said, “Bucky was… impatient. Even my father didn’t have time to prepare much. It all just, you know, happened.” You spoke as you helped yourself to some breakfast, taking a seat at the table where you could see both men well.
You didn’t miss the way Bucky’s jaws kept clenching and unclenching as you tiptoed the line between telling the truth and lying to Sam.
“Yeah,” Sam agreed, “I know how impatient he can be.” He glared at Bucky, who shook his head in disbelief.
“I take it you two work together now?” You only asked because you remember how the parents would always talk about how wonderful it would be if these two boys worked together. Apparently they made a great team back then.
“We do.” Bucky answered, placing his mug down before turning around and began chopping some things.
“You see,” Sam began explaining in a playful tone. “After everything happened, Bucky was all along. Poor little princeling with no guidance and a kingdom to run.” You saw Bucky shaking his head at Sam’s words. Sam continued, “So I knew I had to step in and become his mentor. He wouldn’t have survived without me.”
You made a mental note to ask about what ‘everything’ he was referring to, but couldn’t help but smile at the camaraderie between them, despite it all. Sam had always been a good company. He was the sun rays filtering through dark clouds, and Bucky was the dark, gloomy day who needed the sun’s brightness.
“Wouldn’t have survived.” Bucky muttered, mocking his friend. “You helped me train sometimes. You introduced me to people. That’s about it.” He clarified, bringing over a bowl of chopped fruit over to you and pushed it towards you without a word said.
You liked fruits for breakfast. And you assumed he remembered. But he did it all too casually. As if he did it every day. You didn’t want to cause a scene so you accepted the bowl quietly.
“That’s about it?” Sam shook his head, then turned to you. “I took care of him like a parent–,”
“No you didn’t. You–”
“–and this is how he treats me. I should’ve let you bleed out from that bullet wound that one time. Maybe you wouldn’t be here disrespecting me then.”
You chuckled, clearly on Sam’s team. Bucky didn’t like that. “What about my wife then? Who would be taking care of her?”
“I would.” Sam answered without missing a beat. “We all know if not you then I was gonna marry her.” He turned to you, knowing damn well he was gonna get a reaction out of Bucky any time now. Sam lived to mess with Bucky after all. He always did, ever since you were all kids. “Wouldn’t you have married me if Bucky had died?” He asked you with that mischievous smile on his face.
“I–,”
“You answer that and you’ll never see Sam again.” Bucky said, narrowing his eyes at you, before you couldn’t get a word out of your mouth.
Sam smirked triumphantly.
You rolled your eyes at Bucky and looked right at Sam and said, “I would’ve married you in a heartbeat, Sammy.”
Sam went to grab your hand, surely to bring it up to his lips for a kiss, but Bucky threw a napkin right at him before he could.
“You touch my wife again and I swear–,”
“Must you always threaten people?” You asked, glaring at Bucky.
He glared back. And opened his mouth to say something but Sam cut him off. “Hey, hey, kids. No fighting.” He quickly changed the topic, “Now, since you have gotten married and no one was there, how about a party? To announce it to everyone? We could invite the whole city.”
Party. Yeah right. The last time you attended an extravagant party you had your heart broken. Not just broken, but stepped onto and crushed to a pulp.
You went to say no, “Maybe we shouldn’t–,”
But Bucky declared, “Absolutely we should. After all, we waited almost a decade to marry each other.” He looked right at you as he said that. “It’s time everyone knows you’re finally mine.”
“Perfect!” Sam began planning immediately. He had always been the life of all parties, and he loved them.
While you occasionally answered his questions, you didn’t stop glaring at your husband while you finished your breakfast. There was something he was hiding. You were certain of it. But what?
—
A couple days later, it was finally the night of the party.
The past few days had been more or less similar. You’d always wake up sprawled all over Bucky’s chest, and he always made a teasing comment about it. You’d have breakfast in silence, after which he’d disappear and then he’d come home in the evenings. You never talked while having dinner.
The one time you did talk, it didn’t end well.
You brought it up at dinner. “I tried to go out today. Your people followed me into the city.”
“Our people.” He corrected. Bucky didn’t find anything wrong with that apparently because he simply said, “And they’re your security detail. They’ve been ordered to follow you.”
“So I don’t escape?”
“So you’re always safe.”
“Oh come on. You can’t keep me here forever.”
He shrugged, “You’re not being kept. This is your home, we’re married. This is where you live now.”
You stood up from the table.You didn’t care that the housekeepers you’d been recently introduced to could hear. “And who are you to make that decision for me?” You asked, in a surprisingly calm tone.
He replied in a similar tone. “Your husband.”
You sighed, trying your hardest to keep it all contained. “I have a life, you know? A totally separate life I’ve been living since I left this place. I have to get back to it at some point. You proved your point. Now let me go.”
He ignored all of that. “I’m working on transferring all your businesses and staff here.” He announced. “I’m buying a brand new building in the city, you can have it and set it up however you want. The only thing I can’t find is your secret army of highly trained soldiers.”
“You’ll never find my girls.”
“Why’s that?”
“They’re trained to outrun men like you. All men, in fact.” You added, “I made sure of that. I made sure they’d never be used and moved around like pieces on a chessboard then discarded by people like you.”
“Sounds like you speak from experience.”
“Fuck you, Barnes.” You spat before walking away.
You made sure to sleep on the very edge of the gigantic bed that night, as far away from him as possible. But in the morning, you still woke up snuggled into his chest, on his side of the bed, like you’d been trying to burrow under his skin seeking warmth at night.
You didn’t speak after that. You made sure to ignore him. Each time you left the house, to go see your father or to just roam around the city you’d missed so much, you’d look in the rear view mirror and find big, bulky SUVs following you around.
And here you were now, after days of silent treatment, you stood in front of the large mirror in the closet of your bedroom and watched your reflection. Of course the bastard had chosen an extravagant evening gown for you to wear which looked eerily similar to the one you wore that night for your birthday almost ten years ago.
Except this one was much more elegant. And looked a lot like a wedding dress. With its simple square neckline, thin straps, fitted bodice and a majestic skirt. All white and sparkly. The last time you felt like a princess, the night ended terribly. So this time you were afraid to even let yourself appreciate the beautiful woman in the mirror who stared back at you.
You kept fidgeting, with the skirt of the dress, watching it swish around. You didn’t notice Bucky approaching you from behind. Not until he stood right behind you, his chest brushing against your slight exposed back.
He looked… unreal in his all black suit. Shiny black tie and a small shiny pin. His hair was perfect as always, and his all black outfit really made his eyes seem bluer than ever. Or maybe it was the lights in this closet that did it. But it made you notice the lines by his eyes, which gave away just how much time had gone by.
He was still that bad boy with tattoos whom you had a crush on, who made your race whenever he looked at you. Except now he was older, meaner. And your husband. Whom you hated.
Did you?
You tensed up when he placed a hand on your waist, right where the bodice and skirt were sewn together. You met his eyes through the mirror, but said nothing. You had no mean words to throw at him this time and neither did he.
“You look beautiful.” He said, leaning in just a little to rest his cheek against your temple.
You froze at the soft touch which drove you insane. You must be ovulating, you thought, because there was no way that mere touch was making your heart race like this for no other reason. You began breathing faster, that’s how fast your heart was racing.
You almost leaned into his touch, ready to forget it all just for one moment of warmth. Of peace and quiet. Just one moment to appreciate that you looked beautiful and you had your husband’s attention and all was well. To appreciate that you two look great together. To stop fighting this weird alchemy between you two which kept drawing you to one another no matter what. But then you remembered.
“Do I?” You asked, keeping your voice steady. “You sure I don’t look like a kid’s toy with this ridiculous dress on?”
He remembered too, judging by the look on his face. He looked surprised, then briefly apologetic before settling on a familiar, broody frown. “What did I say about being a brat?”
“I’ll stop being a brat when you stop being an asshole.” You scoffed. “You always were so… careless. With people. With everything. Always thinking you were above everyone else, ever since we were just kids.” You added, “I hate you.”
He smirked, then grabbed your elbow and turned you around so he could look at you, or glare at you with his ocean blue eyes. “You didn’t hate me back then, did you?” He pushed you against the closest surface, which happened to be a wooden dresser. “You craved my attention back then. You used to find excuses to hold my hand when we were little. When we got older you used to hate it when I looked at other girls at school. Now look at you. You’re in my house, you sleep in my bed.” He leaned in, whispering in your ear, “You’re my wife. Then why do you keep resisting me, hmm?”
“I was stupid back then. Wasted so much time trying to get your attention, and all I ever was to you was a whiny, bratty–,” You cut yourself off with a surprised gasp as you watched Bucky lower to his knees in front of you, his hands lifting the skirt of your dress. He was rough with it, crumpling it in his strong fists. “What are you doing?” You asked, shocked and surprised but not making a move to get away. “You– you’re ruining my dress.”
He looked up at you, bunching some of the fabric near your waist and holding the front part of your dress up, pinning the bunched up skirt at your abdomen. As if he wanted to–
Your entire face burned when you realised just how close and intimate this was.
“I bought this dress. I’ll ruin it if I want to.” He spoke in that arrogant tone you weren’t sure you entirely hated at this moment. “You’re lucky I’m not tearing it off of you.”
“And you’re lucky I’m not–,”
He cut you off by leaning in and kissing your inner thigh. Just like that. As if you weren’t on the verge of arguing just now. You were still processing that soft kiss he left on your thigh, and he was already moving to spread your legs apart as he slowly looked up, waiting to see if you’d tell him to stop or push him away.
You didn’t.
His eyes remained focused on your face as his hand reached out and he ran his metal knuckles between your legs, along your wet folds through your thin underwear, making you shudder at his mere touch. You flinched at the cold, but didn’t pull away.
“You’re dripping.” He commented, slowly sliding down your underwear. “Does arguing with me turn you on, baby? Is that why you do it all the time?” He smirked, finally throwing your underwear to the side.
You glared at him, opening your mouth to argue yet again but you ended up just letting out a soft moan as you felt his metal fingertips gently trail up and down your legs. He chuckled at how sensitive and responsive you were. Bucky placed a kiss on your inner thigh again and you gasped.
“Looks like you haven’t been taken care of in a while.” He said, moving his fingers over your clit, circling it slowly. “Have you?” He sounded like he was accusing you.
“No.” You hissed, angry at how much you didn’t mind his touch. “You barged in and married me before I could go out and find someone who might–,”
“I tolerate you talking to and about Sam because he’s our friend.” He cut you off. “But if I hear you talking about any other man, I promise I will be committing unnecessary crimes and it’ll all be on you.” He paused, glaring at you. “You hear me?”
You nodded. Fuck he looked good from up here.
He held your stare as he leaned in and placed his mouth to your core, giving your clit a firm such before his warm tongue slipped past your folds and teased your dripping hole. One hand holding part of your dress up while the metal one worked in tandem with his tongue, circling your throbbing clit and parting your wet folds with ease.
“Should’ve known you’d taste like fucking heaven,” He whispered, almost to himself.
You couldn’t hold the moans and whimpers in, feeling his stubble rubbing against your soft skin, craving more of it. You couldn’t help but slide hesitant fingers into his hair, pulling him closer. “Please, more…” You whined.
That made him wild. And he ate you out relentlessly, taking his time and learning what worked for you and what didn’t, until your legs were shaking and your moans were louder.
He slid his fingers, just a knuckle deep inside you and watched how much you loved that. “That feels good, doesn’t it, baby?”
You only whimpered in response.
When he was certain you were right on the edge, hips moving in a frantic way which made you grind against his fingers and tongue, only then did he pull away and let go of your dress before standing back up to face you with a condescending smirk.
“You think it’s that easy?” He spoke, but you focused more on the wetness coating his lips rather than his words.
You blinked a couple of times to break out of whatever spell he’d just put you under using that damned mouth and fingers of his. He’d… he’d dared bring you right to the edge. But hadn’t let you come.
You were breathing heavily, feeling hot and tingly all over.
He chuckled, enjoying the speechlessness which was rare when it came to you. “If you want more, then behave tonight. Be good and tell everyone how in love we are and all the nice things, and I promise I’ll take care of you later tonight. Okay?“
You knew what he was doing. He wanted you to tell as many people as possible because the more people knew, the harder it would be for you to sneak out of this place again.
He didn’t even wait for a response. He just licked his lips clean, shamelessly holding your stare while he did. Then turned to the mirror and fixed his suit before bending down to pick up your discarded underwear. You looked away, embarrassed but waiting for him to hand it to you.
Except he didn’t. He pocketed it like it was nothing and said, “Come on, our guests are waiting.” Then he walked out of the room like nothing happened. Like he hadn’t made you almost lose your mind just minutes ago. Like he didn’t have his tongue and fingers inside you. Like he hadn’t gotten so close to making you come.
Like your heart wasn’t still racing even after he’d left the room.
Eventually, you calmed down. Fixed your makeup, hair and dress again before heading towards the temporary, clear outdoor party tent Sam had people install in Bucky’s huge backyard. The closer you got, the more it looked straight out of a fairytale. Given the clear walls, you could see the golden lights and decor inside.
The chandeliers, the floral arrangements, the tables and the dance floor where people danced with their partners.
Speaking of partners, there by the entrance stood a tall, dark figure. Your husband.
“Took you a while.” He muttered once you got close enough to him.
You stopped by his side and sighed. Then answered in a monotone voice, trying to hide how bothered you were. “Well, some conceited asshole left me to deal with a mess he made so there’s that.”
Bucky snickered. “Don’t act so indifferent. You were dripping all over my tongue and hand just minutes ago.”
“Keep your voice down.” You hissed.
“Nothing to be ashamed of. It’s not taboo for a husband to take care of his wife, you know?” He sounded just as annoying as you expected he would.
You looked down and noticed he had his elbow extended out for you to take. You took it and spoke once you two began walking into the venue. “If you think you are getting anywhere near me to take care of me again, husband, you are dead fucking wrong.” You put a fake smile on as people began noticing your arrival and flocked to you.
Bucky whispered one last thing into your ear before he left you in the care of the excited, curious, and loud group of ladies coming your way, “Oh you’ll beg me to touch you soon enough, wife.”
Then he was gone again. Leaving you right on that edge again.
Damn him!
—
You had to give it to Sam, he knew how to organise a party. The decor, the food, the music, the performances, all of it was perfect.
He even re-introduced to all the people you might have forgotten while you were gone. And naturally everyone had questions. You repeated the same answers to them all. The same lies.
Where were you this whole time? You wanted to do your own thing, and make your own name so you decided to get away from home.
Why did you leave right after it was announced that you were to marry Bucky Barnes? Oh your father never said when you were to marry him. He just said you would. Besides, both you and Bucky were too young to marry back then.
Did Bucky know you were going to be gone? Of course he did! You two were childhood sweethearts after all. Yes, you did keep in touch this whole time and only fell more and more in love. Yes, distance does make the heart grow fonder and all.
Why did the wedding happen so suddenly and in secret? After almost a decade of being far apart from each other, you two could no longer wait anymore. So you eloped the day you came back.
There are rumours that your father and Bucky have some kind of tension going on between them, is any of it true? That was the one question you didn’t feel too confident about. Because your father never ended up telling you why that was. How did the rivalry start? You lied and said, it’s just because you eloped. Your father wanted to be involved but you were too in love to think straight. So now your father was giving your poor husband a hard time for stealing his little girl.
As you paraded around and met everyone, you could feel Bucky’s eyes on you at all times. You didn’t have to look to know. You could feel the burning sensation along your back and you just knew he was watching you.
And he watched all night. Up until the moment people began leaving and you had no choice but to find him again, not knowing what else to do.
“You lie very well.” He commented, holding his elbow out for you to take again.
You did. And also leaned into him a little because you had been standing for too many hours. You decided to ignore the hostility for just a minute. “Yes, I’m a natural.”
“Everyone bought your bullshit about how we are childhood sweethearts turned lovers.” He whispered, turning his head to face you.
“Well, you did say to make it believable.”
“Oh it is.” He boasted, “Especially since you’ve been looking at me like that the whole night.”
You rolled your eyes, “How?”
“With longing, and desire. You’re all hot and bothered. You crave my tongue back on that throbbing little clit, don’t you?”
“You’re delusional, Barnes.”
“And you’re dripping wet for me, Mrs. Barnes.”
—
The party ended, and after Sam left you and Bucky made your way back inside the house. Sam, being the angel that he was, had made sure a clean up crew would be here early the next morning so you had nothing to worry about.
Not that it should bother you whether or not Bucky’s house is tidy.
You had a faint smile on your face as you went about your nighttime routine. Shower, skin care, a quick snack in the kitchen. And while you were downstairs, searching the pantry for something sweet, you saw Bucky near the thermostat.
The pantry hid you well, so Bucky didn’t see you. But you watched him mess with the temperature. You squinted and realised he was lowering it. The damned bastard was making it colder! No wonder you were freezing each night and woke up each morning snuggled up to him, basking in his warmth.
This asshole.
You remained in hiding until Bucky left, and this time as you made your way upstairs you vowed you wouldn’t reach for his warmth. No matter how cold it got. And he wouldn’t get to use you as a personal heated blanket either. Let him freeze.
You barely lasted thirty minutes under the covers.
And he was quiet and didn’t move so you thought he was asleep already as you carefully scooted a little bit closer, trying to feel where he was in the dark. If only this bed wasn’t so damn big. You patted around, trying not to move to much as you–
“I can hear you, you know? If you want to cuddle, just say it.”
You stopped moving immediately. “Shut up.” You muttered, frowning at him even though he couldn’t see it. You could see his faint silhouette in the dark, so you knew when he turned on his side to face you.
“What is it, wife? You need some warmth on this cold, cold night?” He asked in that mocking tone of his.
“No.” You answered, lying. Because yes you did.
He muttered ‘stubborn brat’ under his breath and then grabbed you and pulled you close until your back was completely pressed against his chest. His warm, comfy chest. You bit back a sigh of relief once you felt his body heating wrapping you in a cocoon.
“I saw you messing with the thermostat.” You admitted.
“Oh?”
“Yes. You make it cold on purpose.”
“Oh no.” He mocked. “ Why didn’t you fix it then?” He asked, and it hit you how childish this was. He leaned in just enough so that his lips brushed against your cheek when he spoke. “Could it be that you like cuddling with me?”
“Shut up.”
He scoffed, finally wrapping his arms around you, but you hissed upon feeling his metal arm on your body.
“It’s cold.”
“Warm it up for me then.”
“What–”
You stopped talking the moment Bucky grabbed one of your legs and hooked it on top of his, spreading your legs to make room for his hand as you both remained on your sides, with him spooning you from behind.
His metal hand found itself sliding into your shorts, past your underwear and he cupped you with such confidence and authority that you couldn’t help leaning into and grinding into his touch. His other hand slid under your pillow and down so he could grab and give your breast a firm squeeze.
Fuck. His hands felt like they were touching you everywhere.
“I told you I’d take care of you if you behaved.” He whispered into your ear. “Time for a little reward, wife.”
He slid two fingers inside you, you gasped at the feeling of him being knuckles deep inside you. You whined as he stretched you a little, moving his fingers around until your hips were moving on their own, trying to get him to move some more.
He chuckled. “That feels good?” He murmured into your ear.
His voice, his warmth, the softness of his embrace, the unhurried way his fingers were moving in and out of you, sliding over your clit and stroking your walls like he had all the time in the world.
Your hands wrapped around his metal wrist, keeping his hand in place as you rode his fingers the way you wanted. Hips moving forward and causing his fingers to slide in and out, while you moaned and whimpered.
His lips brushed against your cheek over and over again as he whispered against your skin, “See how nice it is when you behave? Hmm? You can have me whenever you want, baby. Just be good for me, and I’ll do anything for you.”
The animosity between you was forgotten at this moment. Here, in this dark room the past didn’t matter for a few minutes. Nothing mattered, just that you wanted something and he was giving it to you.
His thumb caressed your clit, teasing it a little more until you cried out, “Bucky, please…”
He froze. You did too. Then he chuckled and said, “So all is takes is a little finger fucking and now you have manners and you call me by my name?” He sounded just as annoyingly playful as you knew he would.
“Oh fuck you!” You spat, then immediately let out a loud moan as he sped up and really fucked you with his fingers until you were a whimpering mess. “Please, please, please…”
“What did I say, huh?” He hissed. “Keep acting like a fucking brat and you’ll be treated like one.” He kept his fingers moving in and out of you. “I planned on really taking care of you tonight, but you know what? This is all you’re gonna get.”
Your moans and whimpers got louder and louder until you began clenching around his fingers, coming undone with a loud cry of his name. Body shaking and your hips grinding down on his hand as you savoured the last moments of your orgasm before he pulled out and pulled away from you.
You thought he’d go right back to sleep but then you felt him get out of bed. “Where are you–,”
“I’ll fix the temperature.” He mumbled, sounding annoyed. Rightfully so. “Go to sleep.”
And that was the last you heard or saw of him until the morning because you passed out right after. You didn’t even know if he returned to bed or not. Not that you cared much.
Right?
—
Things changed after that night.
A lot changed actually. Bucky had, miraculously, managed to uproot ten years of your life from elsewhere and planted it right here in the city. He took you to the building he’d been getting ready for you and it sure was something. You didn’t know what you expected but a brand new skyscraper was not what you had in mind.
The day he handed over papers and keys and gave you a tour of the huge building was the first time you felt a shift in this… bond you shared with him.
“Thank you.” You simply said as you both stepped into the shiny elevator so he could take you all the up to the top floor, to show you to your new office.
Bucky slid his hands in his pockets and turned to face you. “You think being nice equals sexual favours from me, wife?”
You could’ve told him to shut it. Or told him to go get fucked. But he was trying to be good to you, wasn’t he? Even after all he did, he wanted you next to him for some unknown reason and frankly you were tired of resisting. Your entire life was here now anyway. It wouldn’t hurt to… try. Would it?
So instead you answered with, “Doesn’t it?”
Bucky narrowed his eyes at you, searching for the catch. He didn’t find any so he said, “We’ll see about that.”
And that night he followed you into the shower and kissed you hard under the falling water. “I see you behaved yourself today.” He whispered against your mouth.
You pulled him closer by grabbing his neck and said, “Do I get a reward then?”
He didn’t say anything, just kissed you hard again and walked the two of you backwards until your back collided with the cold clear glass of the shower cubicle. Then he pulled away, looked down into your eyes. His own filled with lust and hunger as he asked, “You’re gonna let me fuck you?”
You nodded quickly before saying, “Yes. Please.”
He didn’t waste a single moment. He grabbed one of your legs and hooked it to his hip, spreading you open. He kissed you senseless again while he pushed inside of you. You moaned into the kiss as he filled you up, his cock stretching you out, making you whine and whimper as he slow fucked you.
“Fuck…” He breathily moaned against your open mouth while he moved against you. Pushing deeper, in and out of you until your moans and whimpers got louder and louder. The sound of the water falling from the shower drowned out most of it, so he fucked you until you moaned loud enough that he could hear you over the falling water.
“Please,” You cried out. Weeks of frustration wanting to be let out. “Please, Buck…” Your hands wrapped around his shoulders, and you held on while he fucked you.
Bucky almost froze again at the sound of his nickname falling from your lips. But he maintained his composure and sped up into you, feeling your walls clenching around him, gripping his cock.
“You’ve been good today,” He said, noticing the way you clenched around him hard at the sound of praise. “You didn’t talk back, not once. Is it because you wanted this cock, baby?”
You whined in response. Feeling his damp skin rubbing against yours, and for a brief moment you wanted to live in this moment forever.
“Oh, poor baby.” He gave you a messy, heated kiss then said, “It’s all yours, you know? You just have to ask nicely. And you can have it whenever you want.”
“Please…” You begged again, your pride nowhere in sight. “Please, Bucky.”
“Come for me, baby…” He breathed against your skin. His hands held you in place as he pounded into you. “Come for me.”
You did, moaning so loud it was all he heard as he came right after you.
—
It became a daily thing over the next few weeks. You’d seek Bucky out at random times during the day or more often right when he’d get into bed at night.
“Were you good today, wife?” He asked, his hands already moving all over you trying to undress you as fast as he could.
“Yes,” You breathed into his ear, your hands touching him all over his tattooed chest. “I even made you breakfast, remember?”
“Those burnt pancakes count?”
You shut him up by kissing him, pulling him down onto the bed and straddling him, then proceeded to ride him until you were both moaning and spent, too tired to move.
—
Things got… playful.
Oftentimes you’d catch yourself wondering why you weren’t actively working to get out of here. But your whole life was here now. Work, your family, and your husband. You didn’t hate Bucky as much as you thought you would. Just a few months ago you wanted to kill him on sight but now…
“I saw the new building you work at. He bought you that?” Your father asked one morning when you went over to join him for breakfast.
You cleared your throat and answered, “He did. He moved everything here. My businesses, my staff, all of it.”
“And the girls?” He asked, referring to the infamous, feared, and fierce army you had raised and trained over the last ten years.
“My girls are free to go wherever they want to.” You let pride fill you as you thought of them. “Besides, they don’t have to be here for me to know I can always count on them. They’re just a phone call away.” You explained. “Plus they have work to do. People to save, women to recruit. You know, the usual.”
“I’m proud of you, you know?”
You smiled at your father. Then a few moments passed and you couldn’t help but ask, “What happened after I left? Where is the rest of Bucky’s family?”
Your father looked surprised. “He didn’t tell you?”
“Tell me what?”
Your father shook his head. “It doesn’t matter now. They’re all gone anyway. Plus the boy, he… he treats you right, doesn’t he?”
You nodded. Then left it at that. You wanted a peaceful morning with your father, you didn’t want to ruin it by insisting he tell you about whatever it was that he wanted to keep in the past.
—
But it bothered you, knowing that something happened while you were gone that you knew nothing about and everyone refused to tell you about it.
All except one man. Your beloved friend, Sam.
He showed up one morning, demanding to see Bucky.
“He said he has an important phone call to attend to. With someone named Steve. He’s been outside for over an hour now,” You explained to Sam, who stood at the foyer looking disappointed, “It looks like he’ll be out for quite some time.”
Sam frowned, and sighed. “He said to come over for a round of golf.” He sounded like he’d been betrayed. “Ever since he started doing business and being friendly with that Steve guy,” Sam complained, “That bitch has been trying to steal my best friend.”
You chuckled and grabbed his hand to lead him further into the house. “I’m sorry my husband ruined your playdate, Sammy. But you can hang out with me.”
Sam reluctantly agreed only after you promised to make him blueberry muffins. He liked those ever since you were kids.
He agreed to help, and you both had a nice, comfortable conversation going while you worked. You caught yourself shaking your head a few times thinking about how just a few months ago if someone had told you you’d be in Bucky’s kitchen making muffins you wouldn’t believe it.
But here you were now.
Then Sam casually said, “I’m glad you two worked it out, you know? You’re so perfect for each other. Even back when we were kids, remember how everyone used to tease you two and say you would surely marry one another?” He laughed. “I mean after he told me all about how you heard him on the phone with me by the pool, I was worried you might never clear up the misunderstanding.” He chuckled, keeping his eyes down as he lined the muffin tin so didn’t see the way you froze. Sam continued, “I thought that’s why you left when I heard about your sudden disappearance. But–”
You cut him off, heart racing as memories of that night came flooding back in. “Sam… what do you mean on the phone with you?”
Sam looked up, frowning. “That night of your twentieth birthday. Remember how you found Bucky by the pool? He was on the phone with me that night. He was so angry when he told me what his family was planning to do to yours, how they were going to–,” Sam cut himself off as the realisation set in. “Did he not tell you the truth?”
Your heart pounded. Something was wrong.
“Tell me what truth?”
Sam’s eyes softened. “Oh, I shouldn’t be the one to–,”
“Sammy, please.” You begged in a whisper. “Even my father refuses to tell me anything. I have the right to know. What happened?”
Sam tried his hardest to make sense as he told you everything in a rush. ���Look, something went wrong back then. Bucky’s family began siding with the rivals and they were trying to take your father down. They tricked your dad into thinking that getting you and Bucky married would be a good idea and well, your father chose to believe his friends so he made that announcement at the party.” Sam sighed, “But Bucky’s family were planning something really bad. They were going to use the wedding as an excuse to gather all your family in one place and… end all of you. Just so they’d be able to expand their territory. Bucky found out about this plan and he was pissed. So that night, he called me. To vent.”
You felt your eyes begin to water.
Sam continued. “But then you found him. I remember him whispering to me that you were doing a terrible job at hiding behind a plant or some shit. Then your huge gown gave away your hiding spot. But given you were listening, Bucky decided he’d get you annoyed enough to have you at least try to call off the wedding which would buy us some time to figure out what to do. That’s when he began saying those things about you. Trying his hardest to sound like he truly did not want to marry you.” Sam sighed, “I mean there might have been a better way of doing it rather than fake dialogues on a phone call, but we were twenty year old boys. We didn’t know better. We didn’t know you’d write that note and just disappear.”
What the actual fuck.
“Sam…” You whispered in disbelief.
He shook his head. “Please tell me you didn’t truly believe all that. He lied when he said those things that night, you know? Bucky liked you ever since we were kids. You don't remember how he used to get mad at me whenever I was around you for too long? How he always ignored your hiding spots when we played just so you’d win at hide-and-seek? You don’t remember how he used to bully your stupid boyfriends as we got a older?”
You couldn’t believe any of this. But Sam would never lie to you.
“Wait,” Sam put the pieces together. “So you didn’t know about any of this?”
You closed your eyes and sighed, “I didn’t. I heard all the things he said that night and… I had spent my entire life loving him and I thought…” You sighed. “I was young and stupid and heartbroken so I just left.” Then you explained. “I got back recently, Bucky made this whole show of raining down bullets at my father’s house and, well, we kinda got married that same day, in my father’s destroyed foyer.”
“You didn’t talk to each other this whole time?” Sam was in disbelief. “Oh for fuck’s sake. And I thought Bucky just never mentioned you while you’ve been gone because… well, he’s not exactly good at the whole heart to heart thing. He’s Bucky.”
Your surprise morphed into anger really quickly. “I need to find my husband.” You said, quickly walking out of the kitchen.
Sam yelled behind you, “I'm gonna take this muffin batter and go before he shoots me after he finds out I told you all this!”
You just yelled back, “Bye Sammy, I love you”
Sam’s voice sounded distant as he yelled back, “Don’t let him hear you!”
You ran out to the back, where Bucky said he would be. And you found him by the pool. Again. The sight of him standing there gave you déjà-vu. Except he wasn’t your twenty-year old crush, in a black suit, arguing with who turned out to be Sam, on the night of your birthday anymore.
He was older now, your husband, wearing dark trousers and a loose white-button up shirt, standing by the pool with the sun setting behind him. You stood on the patio, for a second more, admiring him. The metal hand casually shoved in his pocket and his heavily tattooed arm held a phone to his ear.
You called out, no longer containing your anger. “You absolute piece of shit!”
Bucky looked towards you and just frowned, before rolling his eyes. Then said on the phone, “Hang on a minute, Steve. My wife’s angry at me again.” He lowered the phone to his chest and whispered to you, “What is it this time?”
“How long were you going to keep the truth from me?” You accused him. “Why didn’t you just tell me?”
He raised the phone to his ear again and said, “I’ll call you later Steve, something came up.” Then he hung up, tossed his phone onto one of the lounge chairs before turning to face you again. “Don’t get mad–”
“Stop telling me what to do!”
He sighed. “Did Sam tell you anything? I saw his car coming in earlier.”
You hissed, “Oh leave him alone! He’s a good man who doesn’t lie to me!”
Bucky shook his head, understanding that you knew all about what he’d been hiding, and too calmly said, “They were gonna kill you. All of you. Not just your family members, but the guards, the family friends, the members of your family who aren’t even in this life – all of you. I had to do something. My folks were wrong, I couldn’t let innocent people die just because my family got too power hungry.”
You took a step forward, “Why didn’t you tell me before I left? I would’ve talked to someone.”
“We barely even talked to each other as we got older. I thought you wouldn’t believe me.”
“But you could’ve at least tried to say something!”
He was quiet for a moment. Then said, “I came to see you the next day.” He confessed. “The morning after the party. But your father had found your note and you’d already left. You never mentioned exactly why you left in the note, so I let him think it was because of me.” He explained, “Since there would be no wedding I didn’t have to worry anymore. But the threat remained. So I goaded your father into a fight. He took the bait and tried to shoot at me. He missed, of course. But enough people heard about it so he ended up declaring war against my family.”
He paused. You listened quietly.
“No one knew it was all because of me. But at least from then on, your father was more cautious. And he began hating my folks. And they couldn’t keep pretending to be his friend for much longer either. All the truth began spilling out. Soon the city was divided and the attacks began. Allies became enemies, just like that.”
You were quiet. Processing everything. All of that shit happened and you were not aware.
For some reason, you asked, “During those attacks… Is that when you lost your arm?”
You only realised you’d been stepping closer and closer to him when he raised said metal arm and touched your cheek gently. He smiled and said, “No, baby. That was a different time.”
You had a tear sliding down your face. He wiped it away. “What happened then?” You asked.
“My folks didn’t stand a chance. Your father was not only angry and betrayed, but he was also sad that he lost you because of them, or me.” Bucky explained. “It got… really bad. Your father lost a lot of his guys. Then he got angrier. So he stopped responding to the petty attacks and came after my folks directly.”
“He killed them?” They were his friends once.
Bucky said, “He still doesn’t know I helped him all the way until the end.”
“But he spared you.”
Bucky smirked. “He just could never catch me.”
“But your family…” Bucky went against his own you realised.
“They were bad people. Not just because of what they planned to do to you but…” He sighed. “They were doing bad things in the background. Dealing in substances, and people.” He spared you the gory details.
But you understood.
“Why didn’t you tell me all this that day we got married?”
“You wouldn’t have believed me. You had just spent ten years hating me.” He shrugged. “But hey, it kept you safe.”
You stepped closer to him, feeling tired with all that you felt inside you. “So you never meant the things you said that night?”
Bucky pulled you close, cupping your face in his hands. “I have loved you my entire life. I never stopped.”
You sniffled, looking up into his pretty eyes. “We lost so much time. I spent years hating you for nothing.” It hurt thinking about it.
He smiled at you, “I should’ve thought it through better. But I was young and rash, and my family threatened to kill the girl I loved. I thought I was doing the right thing by pushing you away.” He sighed. “I just didn’t think I was going to lose you for almost a decade. I was always aware of where you were and what you did in life in those years. I was so proud of everything you did, the name you made for yourself. But I couldn’t reach you. You were angry and you hated me. So I waited. And then you came back and… I needed you with me. I’m sorry, I couldn’t wait any longer.”
You wrapped your arms around him, shoving your face into the crook of his neck as you let the tears fall quietly.
“Shh,” He whispered, running a comforting hand down your back. “It’s okay now, I’m here. We’re okay.”
“I’ve been mean to you.” You whispered. “I’m sorry.”
He chuckled quietly, “And I shot at your father’s house. We’re equal.”
“I… I love you too, you know?” You sniffled.
Bucky pulled away so he could look down at your teary face. “Sorry to say this, wife, but this isn’t half as romantic as the first time you told me you loved me.”
You frowned. “What?” Did you talk in your sleep? Oh no. Did you? “When did I say it?”
“We were seven, playing in the hedge maze in your father’s backyard.” He smiled, thinking about that day. “He had just had a new water fountain placed in there, and you wanted to show it to me. You must have thought it was pretty and that I needed to see it too. Then you dragged me all the way there and told me you loved me.” He smirked, “Seven-year old you would be disappointed in you right now.”
A chuckle escaped your lips at the faded memory. “I wish we could go back in time.”
“Well, we can’t. But we can have the rest of our lives together.”
You sniffled again, wiped your tears. Then nodded, and leaned in for a kiss. Deepening it the moment he kissed you back. Your fingers found their way into his longish hair and you gently tugged at his roots.
He smiled into the kiss when you whispered against his lips, “I like you with long hair.”
“I see you’re being nice again,” He murmured in between kisses, “Does my wife need something?”
You giggled this time. “I want you, Buck. Just you.”
“You have me.” He said. “Always.”
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I’m sorry when renne says that Andrew clocked Jeremy immediately it’s wilddd. First off you’re telling me this dude has a good gaydar? And pays attention to these things? I’m not sceptical I’m just in awe I love this man.
Secondly, and more importantly, he told Renee? Like renne was all ‘how was the trip’ and Andrew was like ‘jean got bullied on TV and also Jeremy’s gay as shit’ like is that what happened? Why did he tell her? What sort of shit do these two talk about. Things like this make me wish we had Andrew’s pov in the books. Alas, fanfiction my beloved.
#aftg#all for the game#the foxhole court#andrew minyard#jeremy knox#jean moreau#the golden raven#the sunshine court#tsc spoilers
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She fell first/He fell harder request (pretty please, you are my one and only writer I ride or die for) She’s your typical sweet shy kind reader kook, a jeans/t-shirt type, a friend of Sarah. He’s always ignored her though in favor of the extroverted sexy kook girls. She glows up a bit becoming more of a woman and dressing figure hugging (though not revealing. She’s still her and modest) and has decided to let go of Rafe, feeling stupid for just having a crush on someone who couldn’t care less about her. Though now she has his attention and he’s feeling some type of way being ignored/the bare minimum short polite conversation when she used to sneak glances at him at the house or find reasons to linger around him…..and he’s def not okay with guys talking to her…while he is glancing from afar with heartache…..and he’s def gonna follow when a guy leads her away from the party and make some heartfelt declaration. I WANT RAFE SIMPING AND BEING A MESS, CHASE HEEEER
-> A/N: i saw this and just HAD to start writing immediately. I love it so much thank you, anon! <3
worth the wait
-> Rafe x F!Reader

It started years ago, slow and quiet, like a secret you kept even from yourself.
You were there, always there, floating around the edges of his world like a soft breeze he never bothered to notice. A friend of Sarah’s, a Kook by default but never quite the type to demand attention.
You were the quiet one. The sweet one. The one who lingered in doorways when he was around, sneaking glances when you thought he wouldn’t see.
(He never did.)
Rafe Cameron had always been too busy looking at girls who weren’t you. The loud, sexy, confident ones who draped themselves over him like accessories, all sun-kissed skin and effortless flirtation.
They knew how to keep his attention. You? You were just the girl in plain clothing, flipping through paperbacks at parties and blending into the background.
You knew better than to hope. But that didn’t stop you from feeling.
Maybe that’s why leaving for the summer felt like such a relief.
A few months away, an out-of-state camp, something new. You didn’t have to be that girl anymore. The one waiting in the wings, the one hoping for a glance that would never come.
You threw yourself into everything: early morning hikes, late-night talks by the fire, pushing past the edges of your comfort zone until you weren’t just existing, but living.
And somewhere along the way, something shifted.
It wasn’t dramatic. You didn’t come back with a whole new personality, didn’t suddenly turn into one of them...the girls Rafe actually looked at.
But you carried yourself differently now. Stood a little taller. Laughed a little louder. You still wore the same clothes, but they fit you better somehow, hugging the quiet confidence you hadn’t realized you’d built.
Most importantly?
You came back over it.
Over him. Over the way you used to linger, over the ache of wanting something that was never yours to begin with. It was stupid, really. A crush. That’s all it had ever been.
And if Rafe Cameron had never noticed you before?
Well. That was perfectly fine.
Except… now he did.
It happens at a party, because of course it does.
Figure Eight, same crowd, same overpriced liquor being poured into red cups. The air is thick with salt and smoke, music thrumming under your skin as you weave through the sea of familiar faces.
Nothing’s changed.
Except you.
You’re not lurking on the edges anymore, not pretending to be invisible. You’re here because you want to be, because, for once, you don’t feel like an afterthought in your own story.
And Rafe?
He’s exactly where you left him, stretched out in one of the patio chairs, a beer dangling from his fingers, his attention flickering between his phone and the girl curled up next to him. Some blonde, barely dressed, draping herself over his arm like she’s claimed him.
It used to sting, seeing him like that.
Now, you don’t even spare him a second glance.
It’s almost funny, the way his head turns when you walk in: slow and deliberate, like he’s making sense of something his brain can’t quite process. You catch the moment it clicks. The flicker of recognition, the way his easy, lazy smirk falters for half a second before sliding back into place.
You’re laughing at something Sarah says, not even looking his way. Your shoulders back, your head held high, the warm glow of summer still clinging to your skin. And your eyes—God, your eyes—don’t even flicker in his direction.
Maybe it was the liquor running through his blood, but he gets up, the wasted blonde grumbling in frustration as she's pushed aside, and makes his way over to you, heart beating.
“Didn’t know you were back.”
His voice is low, smooth, the same drawl you’ve heard a million times.
You glance up at him, barely breaking stride as you move away from Sarah. “Got in a few days ago.”
His brows pull together. “And you didn’t tell anyone?”
“Sarah knew.” You shrug, effortless, like you don’t notice the way his eyes drag over you, lingering at the way your clothes fit just right. Like you don't care.
(You do. A little. But you’d rather die than let him know that.)
Rafe scoffs, taking another step, cutting off your path like he expects you to stop for him. “Right. Sarah knew.” He tilts his head, watching you too closely. “Guess you’ve been busy.”
You smile, all polite disinterest. “Something like that.”
And then you walk away.
No nervous laugh, no lingering, no waiting to see if he watches you go.
(He does.)
And for the first time in his entire life, Rafe Cameron feels something sharp and unfamiliar twist in his gut.
It takes him a second to recognize it.
Regret.
...
Jealousy isn’t something Rafe Cameron feels.
At least, not like this.
You’re different now. And worse? You don’t seem to give a damn about him anymore.
And he feels it, really feels it, when he sees you laughing with some guy at the party.
Some Kook douchebag he barely remembers the name of, leaning way too close, making you smile in a way that burns in his chest.
His stomach twists. His jaw clenches. His grip tightens around his drink until the cheap plastic cracks in his hand.
“Dude.” Topper’s voice breaks through the red haze, amused and knowing. “You good?”
Rafe doesn’t answer. Just glares at the scene in front of him like he can will it to stop.
(You haven’t even looked at him once tonight.)
You used to... always used to. Sneaking glances, lingering, hoping he’d say something. And now? He could be furniture for all you care.
The guy leans in. Says something that makes you tilt your head back and laugh.
And Rafe sees red.
Before he can stop himself, he’s moving. Drink abandoned, footsteps quick and purposeful as he crosses the room.
By the time you realize he’s there, it’s too late.
“Didn’t think this was your type.”
His voice is smooth, dripping with something too sharp to be casual. You blink up at him, surprised, before your expression flattens.
“I didn’t know I had a type.”
Rafe snorts. “Yeah?” His gaze flicks to the guy beside you, unimpressed. “’Cause last time I checked, you weren’t into desperate losers.”
The guy bristles. “What’s your problem, Cameron?”
You sigh, rubbing your temples. “Rafe—”
But he’s not looking at you anymore. He’s looking at him.
His jaw is tight. His fists curl at his sides. Everything about him screams territorial, and he hates that he feels like this, like he’s been replaced, like you were his to lose in the first place.
And then you do the worst thing imaginable.
You smile at the guy.
A small, amused, totally dismissive smile, like Rafe isn’t even here.
Like he doesn’t matter.
And that’s when it hits him like a truck, like a gut punch, like a sinking, spiraling, helpless feeling.
He’s screwed.
...
Rafe has never had to chase before.
But that’s exactly what he’s doing now.
It starts with little things. Small, almost unnoticeable gestures that shouldn’t mean anything but do.
One: The Jacket
It’s late. Too late to be sitting out by the beach in just a thin hoodie, but Sarah begged you to stay for one more drink, and you didn’t want to seem like the same girl who used to fade into the background.
You shiver once, just once, and suddenly, there’s a heavy weight settling over your shoulders.
“Rafe—”
“Don’t start,” he mutters, shoving his hands into his pockets like he didn’t just drape his very expensive hoodie over you without a second thought. “It’s cold.”
You glance up at him, suspicious, but he just stares out at the water like this isn’t a thing. Like this isn’t the first time he’s ever done something for you without being asked.
(You don’t give it back.)
Two: The Coffee
It’s early, and you’re buried in a book at a café, sipping on some overpriced latte when a familiar voice breaks your focus.
“You drink that caramel crap?”
You blink up, startled to find Rafe leaning against the table, a fresh cup in his hand. Before you can answer, he sets it down in front of you.
Your usual order.
The one you’ve always gotten. The one you thought no one ever noticed.
Your lips part, but Rafe just shrugs, casual. “Figured you might want a refill.”
Then he walks away.
You stare after him, utterly baffled.
Three: The Save
You weren’t going to call it a date.
Just a study session at the country club with some random Kook guy, an easy way to brush up on Econ while sipping from the drink in your hand.
But Rafe doesn’t see it like that.
He sees some guy sitting way too close, leaning over you like he has any right to, and before you can react, there’s a firm hand curling around your wrist.
“Come on,” Rafe says, voice low and final.
You blink up at him. “Excuse me?”
His grip isn’t tight, but it’s there. Protective. “We’re leaving.”
You scoff. “Since when do you get to decide where I—”
“Since you clearly don’t know when someone’s wasting your time.” He glares at the guy, something dangerous flickering behind his eyes. “Trust me. You can do better.”
And even though you should be annoyed, even though you should pull away, you don’t.
Because his fingers brush against your palm for half a second, just long enough for you to realize he’s trembling.
...
You’re not sure what you expected when Rafe finally snapped.
The party is long over. The music has faded, the bonfire burned down to glowing embers, and most of the guests have either gone home or passed out somewhere inside. But you stayed.
Not for him.
(Definitely not for him.)
You just like the quiet. The way the Outer Banks feels when it’s still. When the waves are the only sound, when the sky stretches wide and endless, littered with stars.
You tug your sleeves over your hands, exhaling softly as the wind rolls in off the water. You don’t expect to hear footsteps behind you.
But you do.
“We need to talk,” he says, voice low, words edged in something raw.
You sigh, shaking your head just enough to make a point. “We really don’t.”
His jaw clenches. “Yeah, we do.”
He sits down beside you on the sand, shoulders touching.
You cross your arms. “You can’t just—”
“Why won’t you look at me?” he blurts out.
You freeze.
He’s sitting too close, his expression a mess of frustration and something else. Something bordering on desperation.
You force out a scoff. “Rafe—”
“No, seriously.” His voice dips, softer now. “You used to. All the time.”
Your stomach flips. You hate that he remembers. You hate that he noticed now and not when it actually mattered.
“I grew up,” you say evenly. “I stopped wasting my time.”
Something flickers behind his eyes, and for the first time, he looks hurt.
“That what you think?” he murmurs. “That it was a waste?”
You swallow, shifting uncomfortably. “What else was it supposed to be?”
He exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair. For a moment, he just stares at the ground, like he’s struggling to say whatever is clawing at his throat.
Then, finally
“I was an idiot.”
You blink. “Excuse me?”
Rafe lifts his head, and the look on his face nearly knocks the breath from your lungs.
Because he’s serious.
“I didn’t see it. See you.” He shakes his head, almost like he hates himself for it. “I don’t even know why. I think—I think I was too busy looking at the wrong things, and by the time I figured it out, you weren’t there anymore.”
Your chest tightens. “Rafe—”
“I notice you now,” he says, shifting closer. His voice is rough, uneven. “I notice everything. The way you bite your lip when you’re thinking. The way you tuck your hair behind your ear when you get nervous. How you always pick the raisins out of the trail mix after you play golf.”
Your breath catches.
His jaw clenches. “And I hate it.”
You rear back slightly. “What?”
“I hate that I had to lose you to see you.” He exhales, shaking his head. “I hate that some other guy gets to stand where I should have been this whole time.”
Silence.
Loud. Heavy.
You stare at him, heart hammering, every instinct screaming at you to run, because this is too much, too late, too Rafe.
So you shake your head. Swallow down the ache in your throat.
“I don’t...” You inhale sharply. “I don’t believe you.”
Rafe goes still.
You square your shoulders, trying to steady yourself. “You don’t get to do this, Rafe. You don’t get to ignore me for years and then suddenly—”
“I know.” His voice is hoarse. “I know. And I don’t expect you to believe me.”
You falter.
He shifts closer. Slowly. Cautiously. Like he’s afraid you’ll bolt.
“I just…” His voice drops to almost a whisper. “I just need you to know that I’m trying. That I’m not going anywhere this time.”
You swallow hard, pulse hammering.
Because for the first time, he looks at you: not like a challenge, not like something to win, but like something he’s afraid to lose.
And that scares you more than anything.
...
Epilogue: The Payoff
Rafe dedicated any free time he has to you and only you.
It's not really a conscious decision, there's nowhere else he'd rather be. He's utterly determined to prove to you the depth of his feelings.
You’re browsing the tiny, tucked-away bookstore downtown, running your fingers along the spines, when a book suddenly appears in front of you.
"Thought you might like this one," Rafe says, leaning against the shelf like he belongs there. Like he planned this.
You eye the book, one of your favorites. The same one you used to read at parties when he wasn’t paying attention.
Your lips twitch. "You think you can bribe me with books now?"
"Not a bribe." He shrugs, but there's a telltale smirk on his lips. "Just proving I do pay attention."
You try not to smile.
You fail.
Another time, it's late. You’re shivering outside after a bonfire, rubbing your hands over your arms, when Rafe suddenly pulls his hoodie over his head, a sliver of his toned abs showing, and drapes it over you.
You blink up at him. "Aren't you cold?"
"I'm fine," he says, but his arms are already breaking out in goosebumps.
You roll your eyes but tug the hoodie tighter around yourself. It smells like him: clean, warm, safe.
He doesn’t ask for it back.
You don’t offer.
He's forever jealous although he's resisted making a scene, knowing how much you hate it.
You’re laughing with JJ at a party when you feel it. The heat of his stare.
You glance over, meeting Rafe’s narrowed eyes across the room, his jaw tight, fingers tapping against the glass in his hand.
You arch a brow. Oh?
"Relax," JJ murmurs, amused. "Pretty sure your boyfriend is about to combust."
You don’t correct him.
And when Rafe gets just frustrated enough to stalk over, hand resting at the small of your back, tugging you just a little closer...
You call that a win.
But he's a bit impatient in his love for you.
It happens in his car.
You're laughing—really laughing—at something dumb he said, and he’s just watching you, like he’s trying to commit the moment to memory.
His hand lifts, fingers brushing against your jaw.
You stop laughing.
The air shifts. Your heartbeat stutters. His eyes flick to your lips, then back up.
But you pull away, grinning as you grab the door handle. "Not yet, Cameron."
His groan is tortured. "You’re actually killing me."
You smirk. "Good."
It takes time.
Little moments. Soft gestures. Proof that this isn’t just some fleeting fascination. That he’s all in.
And when you finally kiss him—really kiss him...
He swears under his breath, pulling you in like he’s terrified you’ll change your mind. Like he’s spent years waiting for this and refuses to waste another second.
His hands frame your face, his lips desperate and sure all at once.
When you finally break apart, breathless, he presses his forehead against yours, grinning like an idiot.
"You’re mine now," he murmurs, voice thick.
You smile.
"Yeah, Rafe." Your fingers curl into his hoodie. "I’m yours."
As if you weren't always.
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x you#rafe x reader#rafe cameron fanfiction
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we were drunk it happens - part 3
part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4

pairing: lando norris x verstappen!reader warnings: pregnancy, jos verstappen words: 1.5 k
summary: Y/N find out she is pregnant. she doesn’t want to tell Lando as she was scared of his reaction.
taglist: @martygraciesversion381 / @l-vroom4 / @comicalivy / @sid-is-gr8
Fuck. That was the only thought in her head as she stared at the pregnancy test in front of her. She was on birth control. How the hell was she pregnant now.
This couldn’t be happening. She was only 22 years old. Definitely not ready to be a mom! And a single mom? No way she could do that. Oh my god. How should she tell Lando.
She took her phone and clicked on her brother’s contact. She really needed advice right now and who was better for that than her brother. He would probably be a bit upset but Y/N couldn’t really think of anyone else who could help her right now. After only one rang, Max answered.
“Hey, little one. What’s up? Everything alright?”, he asked.
“No, Max. Nothing is alright! Please. Can you come here? I need you.” Y/N felt tears welling up in her eyes and her voice broke.
“Of course. Are you hurt? Did something bad happen?” Over the phone, she heard how Max grabbed his keys as told Kelly he would have to leave. A second later she heard a door close.
“I am not hurt. No. Please just hurry.” She sank down against the cool tiles of the bathroom wall and just hung up. Max would be there soon. And then everything was going to be okay.
The doorbell rang and Y/N got up slowly to open it. When she did, her brother immediately went to hug her as he saw her wet cheeks.
“Hey. What happened. Did someone hurt you? Are you sick?”, Max asked as he leaned back a bit to look her in the eyes. “You know you can tell me everything, right?”
Y/N just held up the pregnancy test. There was no chance it was wrong. The word pregnant was clearly written across the little display in the white stick.
“That’s… yours? I assume?”, Max asked carefully.
“Of course it is mine! Why else would I stand in my fucking house and cry like someone died?! I don’t know what to do, Max. He will kill me if he finds out.” Well aware that she would make Max’ shirt completely wet, she buried her face in his grey shirt.
“Who will kill you? Who even is the father? Oh my god. It’s Lando, isn’t it. No way.” Max looked concerned, but now Y/N could also see he was a bit disappointed, even though he would never show it.
He was too much of a supportive brother. He would never show his disappointment, nor would he upset her on purpose.
“It’s ok. Everything is going to be alright. I promise. Do you want to tell him, already?”
Y/N shook her head furiously.
“No. He… he can’t know. We said no feelings. He really can’t know. Not yet.” Her brother just nodded while looking thoughtful.
“Do you… do you wanna keep it?” He looked worried as if he was scared that he might have said the wrong thing.
Y/N nodded. She thought about an abortion, but she simply couldn’t. It was her baby. And more importantly, it was her and Lando’s baby.
“I do. It is mine.” She placed her hand on her still flat belly.
“Ok. I just want you to know that Kelly and I will support you. No matter how you decide to raise it in the end. And hey, maybe your baby will be friends with ours in the end. They won’t have a huge age gap.” The Formula 1 driver laughed a bit.
“You are not disappointed?”, Y/N asked. She honestly would have thought that Max would be a bit mad, but here he was, being the most understanding person.
“Maybe a little. No… that’s not right. I am just a little scared. You are my little sister. And… I am not really disappointed just worried about you. But you know I will always support you, no matter what happens.” Max smiled at her which made Y/N a little happier.
“I am going to have a baby”, she whispered, more to herself than anyone else.
***
For over a week, Y/N had been feeling nauseous. The pregnancy made her tired, dizzy and she couldn’t keep any food down. Still, she told Max that she will attend the next grand prix. Monza. She was happy, because she slowly started to like F1 again. When she was younger, Monza had been her favorite grand prix and the atmosphere when the Ferraris were on the podium…
Like Seb had been saying. Everybody’s a Ferrari fan. Even if they’re not they are Ferrari fans.
Even though Y/N was looking forward to watching the race, she couldn’t help but feel nauseous as fuck. She threw up her whole breakfast earlier and now she just felt weak.
Because the last thing she wanted now was being alone, she had decided to go to the Ferrari garage where Charles’ girlfriend Alex already was. They have become quite good friends over the last weeks so Y/N enjoyed being around her. Together they were now staring at the tv in front of them. Observing the different cars and occasionally swearing when they were annoyed or too caught up in the moment.
At some point Y/N excused herself to head to the bathroom, needing to puke again. When she returned, Alex looked at her a bit worried.
“You look shitty today”, she said bluntly.
“Wow. Thank you. I didn’t see that already in the mirror or so…”
“No… I didn’t mean it like that, Y/N. More in an ‘are you okay’ way. Because seriously, you look like you’re about to faint. And I don’t want to explain that to Max later.” Alex looked at her, definitely worried.
“No. I am alright. It just happens sometimes.” Y/N suppressed the urge to throw up again and took a deep breath. “Let’s focus on the race, ok?”
Alex nodded hesitantly.
Y/N really wanted to tell Alex that she was pregnant, but she simply didn’t know how. Furthermore she wanted to tell all her friends she made over the last weeks together. Alex, Lily, Carmen, Rebecca. And of course, her childhood best friend.
A bit later, the race was finished. Charles came in P1, much to Alex’ joy, Max in P2 and Lando in P3. Everything was perfect, until it wasn’t.
She just went outside to head to the Red Bull garage but just as she came near, she heard a sharp voice.
“P2? And you are proud of yourself? Wipe that damn smile from your face, Max. You started from pole; you should have won easily. Didn’t I raise you better?”
Y/N froze outside and couldn’t move anymore. What was her dad doing here? Max didn’t know about it, did he?
Suddenly she felt like she might really faint. Black spots were dancing in front of her eyes, and she couldn’t breathe anymore. She hasn’t seen her dad in at least three years. And honestly, she was glad about it. She didn’t want him in her life anymore.
Y/N knew that Max didn’t have as much of a problem with Jos as she did, but he still didn’t exactly like it when his dad was complaining about him being P2 in a race. She knew he would beat himself up for it, as it would make him believe he was terrible at what he does.
“Y/N? Are you ok?”, she heard a voice say. Lando.
“Uhm. Yes. Everything’s alright.”
Lando eyed her.
“You don’t look like you’re alright… You’re pale and you look like you just saw a ghost. Did something happen? Are you not feeling well?”, he asked.
“No. Seriously everything’s alright.” But in that moment Max walked around the corner, and Jos was just behind him.
“Oh. Y/N. Nice to see you again after you’ve been ignoring my calls for what now… three years? And still living in your brother’s shadow I see.” Jos laughed and Y/N felt like she wanted to die.
She felt tears welling up in her eyes and her chest tightened. The nausea was back as well, and she hated it. Why couldn’t she just live in a normal family?
“Are you alright, Y/N?”, Max asked from where he was standing. His sister just nodded before turning around and walking to Max’ driver’s room.
“Great, dad. Well, done.”, she heard Max say to their dad behind her. But she just started crying. Damn pregnancy hormones.
A little later when she sat on a small couch in the room, she heard a knock on the door. Max.
“Can I come in please?”, he asked while he was already opening the door. “I didn’t know he would be here, I promise, I would have told you. I wouldn’t want to hurt you or even the baby.”
But exactly then, Y/N saw Lando in front of the wooden door. He looked at her with wide eyes the shock evident in his eyes.
“A baby?”
A/N: sorry it took me so long to write this part but i was so tired thanks to school i didn’t have the energy to write a lot. also updates to the next fics and what i am writing etc is on my pinned post / intro post
#f1 x reader#f1 fic#f1 x female reader#f1 fanfic#formula 1 x female reader#formula 1#f1#formula one#lando norris x reader#lando norris#lando x reader#lando norris x y/n#ln4 x reader#ln4 x y/n
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