#*family drama and yelling* well it really is beginning to look a lot like Christmas-

[goofyjelly]

ough

[foryourinformationmd]

Advice from a Professional Doctor, Asher Nitin.

Ignore all the portrayals of life in medical school by your pre-med lecturers. If they begin a med school narrative with, “My nephew is a doctor and he told me…,” instantly disregard it. His nephew did not tell him that. He told him much more. Those are merely the parts he wants to remember. If it isn’t a recently-graduated doctor telling you what life in med school is like, it isn’t going to be anything like what they will tell you. So what is it like instead? Grey’s anatomy? House, M.D.?

Neither. Med school is more like Scrubs and The Knick than it is like Grey’s Anatomy and House, M.D. Unlike Grey’s Anatomy, you and your fellow medical students will not be that good looking. You will not sleep with each other as much. You will not cry over your patients (you’ll have a hard time remembering their full name). And you will not monkey around with barely-tested experimental procedures. Ever. If you do, it’ll probably be the last thing you do because good-bye medical school. Unlike House, all medicine will be diagnostic. Your professors will only appear to be brilliant (it’s really just decades of specialized knowledge and experience; with their subject and with your type). Diagnosis will be algorithmic, and even that algorithm won’t be your own. But you will still get a kick out of it. Like Scrubs and The Knick, your medical school will be your life. You will eat, sleep and dream medicine. Your entire social circle will consist of your colleagues. Your family will be the one stable point in your life. You’ll date your colleagues.

Speaking of dating, your sexy does not go up when you become a doctor. I mean this practically. Theoretically, I’m told doctors are hot. I can see why. They undeniably have inherent value: social standing, (the promise of) money, proof of intelligence (actually, no) and actual power over life (more than you know). But practically speaking (especially if you’re male) your dating life will not get better as a medical student. That is because the demands of medical school will swamp you. You will come home tired. Your pool of prospective partners will mostly consist of your medical colleagues. So while your newfound status as a doctor might have value in non-medical circles, it will mean nothing because you will almost never frequent those circles. But within the circle you’re in, your status as a medical student means nothing, because so what? Everyone is one too. “But Asher!” you say, frantically gesturing at me to pause, “I’ll be smart and date outside of medical school.” No, dummy. You’ll be a dummy if you do that because…

The more friends you have outside of med school the harder it is to excel. Med school is about an ethos. You’re not just part of a course. You’re part of a community. This is now your primary identity. All your self worth are now belong with us, bi*ch. There is this neurological phenomenon seen in people trying to study. When you’re focused on something, if you break off and engage with something unrelated, your brain takes up to twenty minutes to fully refocus on the original task once you return to it. In life as well, broadly speaking, I’ve observed a similar phenomenon. I’ve known three students in med school whose circle of friends mostly lay outside of med school. One hung out with mostly dancers and choreographers. One was a socialite. One hung out with the sons of politicians. They all were (and still are as of now) the worst doctors I have ever seen. This is because they constantly take breaks from the ethos of medical life. They miss out on the rhythm of life in the world of medicine. So you should know that…

You will leave most of your old friends behind, and you won’t even mind. Of all the various professions, I’m told, physicians tend to default the most on school reunions. That is partly because they don’t have the time, but also because they don’t care. It isn’t that we become arrogant or unsocial. It is that the act of medical education deeply changes you. It makes you more functionally intelligent. It makes you less prone to fake drama. It makes you calmer in crisis. All these after-effects will permanently drive a wedge between you and many of the people you used to know. This is a surprising side-effect no one anticipates; least of all your elders. And that is an amusing paradox. They anticipate your becoming a doctor because they know medical school is elevation. They don’t realize the side effect of this elevation is you will now talk down to them.

Your most important subject in pre-med is physics. Look, pre-med isn’t really about information continuity. The organisms you will dissect in pre-med will be phylogenetically disconnected from med school. You dissect a plant stem, a plant root, an earthworm, a cockroach, a frog, and then… a human being? See? You won’t be seamlessly connecting domains of knowledge. Pre-med isn’t even about building a conceptual base. Many things you learn in pre-med biology will be repeated in so much greater detail in med school that your prior knowledge will only partially help. Pre-med is about picking up mental skills you will need. Let’s talk about those.

You need to learn to form a train of thought fast. The great thing about learning to solve problems in physics is that you learn to solve problems in general. You learn to quickly identify variables and constants. Sometimes there will be constants in the problem that would normally be variables in real life. You learn to work with those too. Physics allows you to become mentally agile with concepts. If you get fluid mechanics, you can handle the physiology of hypovolemic shock. If you get lever mechanisms (in different orders), you can handle applied anatomy in orthopedics. If you get optics, you can handle a lot of neurology and ophthalmology. In my experience, the students who have the hardest time in med school are the ones who didn’t learn to think on their feet within a fixed framework of time.

You hate memorizing? Actually, you don’t. It’s all about the context. Literally none of us salivated at the prospect of memorizing taxonomies. We hated it and struggled over it and were glad when we were done with it. That was because it was something we knew we would never use. In med school, you will do a lot of memorizing. But you will enjoy it (or at least you can, if you choose; I’m a huge nerd). Many doctors will tell you how easily drug classifications embed themselves in their brains. This is despite the fact that the latter are more complex than zoology taxonomy charts or botanical floral formulas. The difference is that your knowledge of drug classification will impact what you will say to your aunt when she confronts you over her persistent back pain over Christmas dinner (poor posture, it’s always poor posture; she sits like a potato). So you will memorize a lot. It won’t be anything like memorizing was before. Rest easy. You will find it easy to like it.

Your persona does not matter. Caring for people and being compassionate and wanting to cure disease are the least important things in medicine. You need to be able to meaningfully link vast amounts of information to come to a correct diagnosis as per established algorithms. You need to perform surgical procedures within a reasonable amount of time with a decent degree of success. All else is secondary. When most of your non-doctor relatives tell you that a doctor’s personality matters, they’re doing something called argument from ignorance. You see, the world of medicine is so big and so complex that most of it is technically incomprehensible to the general public. So they latch on to the few aspects of a doctor’s life they are mentally capable of understanding (and commenting upon; remember their first reaction to meeting someone with an education superior to theirs is to give them tips). So they will talk about a doctor’s personality because it is the only part they can presume to have some expertise on. Even that they do not. Don’t ever do stupid things like falling in love with your patients or building deep and personal relationships with your patients. You will never last in medicine. This is not because the emotional trauma of losing them will wreck you. This is because you will go bankrupt fighting lawsuits accusing you of patient preference. You will feel the pressure in the things non-doctors will say behind a good doctors back. “He’s so boring at parties, he can only talk work stuff.” If that is your destiny, so be it. Own it. They find you boring? So what? You were not put on this earth to entertain the illiterate at parties. You were sent here to be a lifesaver; not to have a personality that appeals to the lowest common denominator.

I’m telling you it does not matter. The practice of medicine is life on the edge of reality. All personalities are welcome because medical school is a personality in itself.

The materialists among us are taught the value of wisdom and the ascetics among us learn to knot a Double-Windsor.

The atheists among us will pray frantically and the religious among us will find no time for church on Sunday.

The loudmouthed learn to whisper in the NICU and the soft-spoken learn to yell, “Stat!” in the ER.

The type-A personalities among us learn to break the news of a patient’s passing to his relatives and the type-B personalities among us learn to argue medico-legal cases.

The clumsy among us learn to suture wounds and the nimble learn to administer CPR.

Materialists. Ascetics. Atheists. Theists. Loudmouthed. Soft-spoken. Type-A. Type-B. Clumsy. Nimble.

In medical school, we all meet in the middle.

PS: Photo not mine. Credits to the rightfully owner. 

[winter-barnes]

Christmas Surprise

Summary: It's Christmas day, and Y/N doesn't get a gift from the person she wants one from the most.

Pairing(s): Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 2k

A/N: I'm vacationing in Hawaii right now and I got bored sitting in my hotel room waiting for my dad to get off of work, so I thought why not write an imagine hahaha. Feedback is appreciated, and I apologize for any spelling/grammatical/characterization mistakes! :)

It's the holiday season, a time filled with laughter, cheers, family, friends, and-

"Presents!" Natasha yells, immediately sitting up straight. "We forgot to get presents for everyone!" 

You, Nat, and Wanda were sitting in your room gossiping about the drama in the compound. At least twice a week they come in your room unannounced and spark up conversation. You didn't mind though, it was nice having girl friends to talk with. It made life just a little bit easier.

"Well it looks like our weekly gossip session is going to have to come to a close for now, we need to go find presents. Christmas is, like, four days away and everyone has already done their shopping." You say. Wanda and Nat nod, and next thing you know you're in the car on your way to the mall with Wanda and Nat.

The next few hours are spent trying to find at least one present that would suit each of the Avengers. Almost everyone was gonna be at the compound this year to celebrate: Nat, Wanda, Tony, Peter, Steve, Bucky, Sam, Scott, Rhodey, Vision, and T'Challa. That's a lot of people to find presents for, and you honestly didn't know if you would be able to pull it off so close to Christmas. 

It took a lot of searching, but eventually you were able to find a present for everyone except for Steve. 

"Guys, I can't think of anything to get Steve." You whined.

"I can think of something." She smirks and Wanda laughs. You roll your eyes as a slight blush floods your cheeks. 

"I need real suggestions guys."

"What's not real about that?" Wanda giggles. "I'm sure he would greatly appreciate it, too." This time Nat's the one laughing. Both Nat and Wanda know about your pretty big crush on Steve. You couldn't help yourself, and really who could? It's Steve Rogers. There's no such thing as self control when it comes to that man.

"You guys know I don't want to tell him." You sigh, "We're friends, I don't want to ruin that with a silly little crush." With that you turn around, and you're glad you did. You spot the perfect present to get Steve. 

You walk over to the glass case and get a closer look. It's a gold pocket watch. On the inside of it is a star engraved into the gold. It was perfect. Steve has been talking about wanting a pocket watch for ages now, and you were kind of surprised you didn't think about getting him one as his present sooner. 

------

After the stressful day of late gift shopping, you head to your room to wrap all of the gifts. As you're wrapping Steve's gift, you think back to the conversation earlier. You really didn't want to tell Steve about your feelings for him. There was always the possibility of him not feeling the same way, and if that was the case then seeing him all the time would be awkward. You didn't want to ruin one of the best friendships you've had, even if that meant suppressing your feelings.

------

A few days later, you wake up to Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree being blasted throughout the compound. You sigh and roll over to look out the window. The sun has barely even fully come up, but you can't say you're surprised being woken up this early, it's Christmas day. You roll out of bed and try to make yourself somewhat decent, and your decent is some leggings, a t-shirt, and your hair pulled back into a ponytail.

You walk into the living room and see all the presents stacked under the enormous tree that Tony was so insistent on putting up. Tony, Bucky, Nat, and Scott are already sat around the tree waiting for everyone. By now a new song is playing through F.R.I.D.A.Y, Jingle Bell Rock. 

"I love this song!" Scott yells as he jumps up and starts dancing. You laugh and shove him so that he lands on the couch behind him. Feeling thirsty, you walk into the kitchen to pour a glass of orange juice. You find Bucky already in there, his head stuffed in the fridge. 

"Find what you're lookin' for there, Buddy?" You chuckle. Surprised, Bucky's head hits one of the shelves as he tries to pull it out. His face is tinted red as you laugh at his clumsiness. 

"Oh, Buck." You laugh. You squeeze passed him and grab the orange juice you came for. You look over at Bucky and he's just watching you, giving you a weird look. "You okay, Bucky? Did you hit your head too hard?" He shakes his head and gives you one last glimpse before walking away. You found it kind of strange, usually Bucky has some sort of smart remark to come back at you with, but he didn't say anything this time around. 

Glass of orange juice in hand, you walk back into the living room. Now everyone is here, and Tony's face is practically dripping excitement now that you've come back.

"Finally we can open the presents now!" He says as he rubs his hands together.

"You know, Stark, Christmas isn't just about presents, it's about -"

"Yeah yeah yeah family and friends yadda yadda yadda. Who's present am I opening first?" He cuts you off and all you can do is chuckle. You look around and see the only open seat is the one next to Steve. You glance over at Nat to see her smirking and you roll your eyes. Of course it was intentional. You make your way to the open seat and sit next to Steve. He looks at you and offers a small smile, but he looks nervous. 

"Want a drink?" You ask, offering a sip of your orange juice. He shakes his head and turns to watch Tony open his present from Rhodey. 

After about 45 minutes, over half of the presents have been opened. Steve has your present to him in hand, and he's getting ready to open it. 

"I hope you like it." You whisper. He opens his mouth to say something, but he quickly closes it and smiles. Something is off, but you're unsure what. Bucky and Steve are both acting really strange. Actually, it's not just them. This whole morning the others have been giving you quick looks, and when you notice them they immediately look away. Obviously something is up, but you have no clue what. 

You push the thoughts away and watch as Steve tears the reindeer printed wrapping paper. He opens the box that holds the watch, and when he opens it his eyes go wide. He looks at you, then the watch. You, the watch, you, the watch. You smile and he pulls it out. 

"Oh my- I love it, Y/N. I absolutely love it." You feel giddy knowing he really likes your gift. "Thank you so much."

"Anything for you." You smile, then blush. 

Soon all of the gifts are opened and the floor is covered in wrapping paper and boxes. You begin to clean up while everyone else heads to the table to have breakfast. As you're cleaning, you realize you never got a gift from Steve. Your heart sinks a little bit. Gifts aren't everything, and you aren't a very material person, but your gift to him was pretty special. Did he not feel the need to get you anything at all? Not even a keychain?

You throw away the last bit of wrapping paper and head to your room. You didn't feel like eating. It wasn't the fact that you didn't get a present from Steve that made you upset, it was the fact that this was proof he didn't feel anything other than friendship towards you. You closed the door to your room and sat on your bed. Your eyes began to water. For some reason, you had this glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, he might have the same feelings for you as you do him. Sometimes you would catch him looking at you, and when you caught him his face would turn pink. Sometimes when you walked into the room you would notice his eyes go wide and his smile grow wider. Sometimes you would notice him getting flustered when you two were alone. But maybe you didn't actually notice these things. Maybe you just wanted them to be real and made yourself think they were really happening.

Twenty minutes pass and you hear walking outside of your door. You quiet your sniffling so that no one can hear, and then you hear the sound of something sliding underneath the door. You peer over the bed and see an envelope on the floor, and you hear the footsteps walk away. You stand up and grab the envelope. Your name is written on it, but it doesn't say who it's from. When you open it, it's just a piece of paper, but it says to go to the roof at six. Confused, you set the paper on your dresser.

Quicker than you expected, five thirty rolls around. You decide to put on a pair of jeans and a new t-shirt for this rooftop meeting. You're nervous about what this could be about. Nothing like this has ever happened, you don't have any idea what to expect. 

You walk into the living room and there's no one to be seen. 

"What the hell is going on?" You mumble to yourself. You make your way to the elevator and press the rooftop button. Your nerves quickly build up as you approach the roof. The elevator dings and the doors open. At first you don't notice anything, but you look down and see writing in chalk. It's a date, November 14th, 2018, and beside the date says, "The first day we met. I couldn't take my eyes off of you." There's rose petals lying on the ground, and little candles lighting a path that goes straight. The dates continue like a timeline. Your heart begins to pound, your hands start to sweat. This isn't what you think it is, is it?

"December 5th, 2018 - You beat me in a fight, and this made me intrigued by you."

"December 29th, 2018 - Neither of us could sleep, so we made pancakes at 2 a.m. and watched Christmas movies. It was this night that I realized how I really felt about you."

"January 11th, 2019 - You got a little too drunk and I carried you home. You were completely rocked, but you still blew me away with your beauty. Even if you were throwing up all over my car." 

"April 20th, 2019 - You took me to my first concert. Of course Bucky and Sam were there, but all I could focus on was you."

"July 17th, 2019 - I saw you go on a date with a man, my heart was broken."

"July 18th, 2019 - You stayed the night with me after getting your heart broken by that man. Little did you know we both we suffering." 

"September 20th, 2019 - I decided I was going to tell you how I felt, but I didn't know how."

"December 25th, 2019 -                            "

Next thing you know, Steve is in front of you holding a piece of chalk. Next to today's date he writes,

"I finally built up the courage to ask you on a date."

You watch him as he stands back up. He looks perfect in the moonlight, his cheeks lightly tinted pink and his eyes sparkling. 

"So, what do you say? Will you go-" You place your lips on his, cutting him off. His arms instantly wrap around your waist while yours wrap around his neck. You both pull away only when you have to breathe, and Steve breathes a sigh of relief. 

"I'm so happy you did that."

"I'm so happy you did this." You give him one last kiss before you pull away. 

"I would love nothing more than to go on a date with you, Rogers."

[pastelpinkcheeks]

Tolkien Secret Santa 2020!!!

Here’s my gift for the 2020 exchange! Happy holiday to y’all ( @officialtolkiensecretsanta ) and a fantastic New Year ! This was written for @stormwarnings​ uwu I hope you find it cute and funny and that there aren’t many typos on it... I am really bad with the typos. Anyways. Have fun!

Title: In which Thorin learns about Hobbit Christmas 

Rating: G

Summary:  Decorations up in mid-November, a pantry filled to the brim with food and declaring war on your cousin because of presents? It's the Christmas holiday at the Shire and Thorin wants to know all about it.

Read it under the cut or at AO3! 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28287660

 The hobbits had this thing called Christmas and Thorin was just discovering how much of a big deal it was. Oh, he wasn’t an ignorant old dwarf, thank you very much, he had some idea of what this Christmas holiday was supposed to be. There were feasts, and celebration, and presents, very similar to the dwarven traditions of Yuletide.

All in all, probably not that much of a big deal. Just harmless winter time fun!

Oh, boy, was he wrong.

It was the middle of November. Thorin was happily bouncing young Frodo on his knee and reading him a children’s story. Only five months since he decided to move into the Shire with his dear Bilbo and Frodo already adored him. The young man was nothing but a toddler, but Thorin was terribly blessed at how quickly he managed to charm Bilbo’s nephew.  Young hobbits weren’t always fond of his rugged looks, and his beard was always raising suspicion around the Shire. Fortunately to him, Thorin was amazing at making different voices for the characters.

“…and then they lived happily ever after.” Thorin finished the book, making the three-year-old clap his little hands in a mismatched rhythm.

That was when Bilbo dropped a heavy box by his feet, startling both dwarf and hobbit. “Good, you’re done! Frodo, darling, guess what we’ll be doing today?!”

The young toddler stared at him with wide eyes. “Dunno?”

Bilbo smiled and opened the cardboard box. “We will be putting on the Christmas decorations!”

Frodo shrieked and hopped of Thorin’s knee, falling to the ground on his chubby knees and palms. He quicky raised back to his feet and dove inside the cardboard box, pawing at all the colored tinsel. Thorin raised an eyebrow.

“I thought your Yuletide celebration only happened in the end of December.”

“Yes, Thorin, but we start decorating earlier.” Bilbo said as a matter of fact.

“You start decorating in November, then?” He hummed, wondering why bother decorating before Christmas itself was knocking on their door. Wouldn’t they be tired of the decorations by the end of December, when the holiday was due to happen? He did not mention that, though, because both Frodo and Bilbo were happily scavenging inside the wooden box.

He ought to write that down. Get used to the Shire festivities!

    And the Shire was boiling with celebration all over the place. Bilbo was consistently sending Thorin to the market to buy more and more food, and even though Thorin had no problem with eating a lot or stocking up food, their pantry was starting to cranky under the weight of all the stuffed hams, salted pork meat, gigantic pumpkins, pots and more pots of honey, a lot of bottles filled with red wine, dark ale and blonde beer. There were also huge blocks of hard cheese, and small blocks of blue cheese pilled on top of each other. Not to mention the vegetables, that, for all Thorin knew, would be stale by the second week of December.

“It’s just in case one of the in-laws drop by and we have to make a quick feast.” Bilbo ushered him off whenever Thorin complained.

“A feast is never quick, Bilbo.” Thorin frowned. In the paper Bilbo had just gave him, there was a small list of items to buy. “Why do we need an entire mutton?”

“Oh, I don’t know, why do we need it?” He placed his hands on his waist, tapping his overly large foot on the wooden floor. “Because it is Christmas!”

If the cranking pantry was worrying Thorin – Frodo can very much be standing under one of the wooden planks when they inevitably break down from the excessive weight! Have you considered that, Bilbo?! – he had not been prepared to deal with the market in the beginning of the third week of December. Not even the halls of Morgoth, during the first age, had been as crowded with mad creatures as that market. Thorin was blessed with height, otherwise he would have been swallowed by the crowd of fussy hobbits.

Patiently, Thorin stood by and waited. Everyone around him was yelling, leaning on the counters and trying to get their goodies first than the others. Fussy hobbits, Thorin thought with a frown. He could be the arsehole and use his louder, deeper voice that compared to theirs was like thunder, but he wanted so much to be a good lover to Bilbo, and he wanted to charm his family. He couldn’t be that guy who went to the market to yell at other people. He couldn’t be that guy.

So, he waited patiently in line and bought all the goodies Bilbo had beautifully written down on his note. Thorin always loved his calligraphy, how he added little dots on top of his letters that more looked like small crystals.

    The other thing he learned was that entire feuds were held over not giving a gift to someone during the Christmas week. Not during Christmas day, no, not that. That was too late for hobbits standards. If you actually cared for friends and family, sending presents had to be done till the Christmas eve otherwise you were as good as declaring war on them.

And Bilbo was considering finally declaring war on his cousin, the dreadful Lobelia Sackville-Baggins.

“Is it worth it?” Thorin asked, fixing the golden tinsel that Frodo had ripped from the top of the entrance door. “What is it about the Christmas spirit again?”

“Oh, don’t you even start.” Bilbo tapped his feet. “Every holiday I give her something good. Something made of silver, or perhaps a new embroidered apron. And guess what? The damned woman will still try to abscond with my silverware.”

“Maybe…” Thorin touched his beard. “Maybe you should give her something extremely valuable. You should humble the woman until she is too ashamed and won’t even try to steal anything.”

“Or perhaps I should give her absolute garbage since she will inadvertently pick something else from this very house!”

And Thorin sat back on the armchair, watching as his lover fussed around the house, trying to select whatever piece of trash he could find lying around the house. Frodo appeared a few minutes later, his child-like voice asking what his uncle was looking for. Thorin bent down and picked him up, setting the young hobbit on his knee. “Your uncle is going on a personal vendetta against his cousin Lobelia.”

“What’s vendetta?” Frodo asked.

“Well… it’s when someone does something bad and you decide to do something bed to them as well.” Thorin frowned. Perhaps he shouldn’t be teaching something like that to young Frodo, and shouldn’t be telling the young kid that his uncle was a mean little bastard when he wanted to. “Actually… why don’t we go wrap up the presents and leave your uncle to his own devices?”

Little Frodo happily nodded and followed Thorin to one of the many rooms inside Bag End. Thorin was sure Frodo had quickly forgotten all about ‘vendetta’ when later that week, during the Christmas, he quickly found out just how good the memory and understanding of a three-year-old could be. When Bilbo was, with an overtly sweet smile, delivering his neatly wrapped present to Lobelia, little Frodo asked:

“Is that the vendetta?” While pointing to the colorful present.

“The what?” Lobelia blanched, frowning at the kid.

Bilbo paled. “Now, where did you learn that word?! Little kids really have a fascinating way of learning, don’t they? Frodo, dear, come, let’s get you another cookie in reward for your excellent vocabulary.”  Said Bilbo while hiding the present behind his back and taking Frodo by the hand.

“But what about my gift?!” Lobelia asked, still confused by Frodo’s words but greedily staring at where the package had disappeared.

She would, obviously, receive her package later. Not the collection of old toothpicks Bilbo had smugly wrapped up in a big box, but a bottle of old brandy he received from Lord Elrond himself. Next year, perhaps, he would fool Lobelia and give her what she deserved. But the important part about a vendetta was not letting the victim know about it!

Now… Bilbo asked himself while he quickly wrapped up the bottle, where did Frodo learn that word?! It didn’t take Bilbo two seconds to figure out where he learnt that, or, even better, whom he learned it from.

    Despite Thorin going on and ruining Bilbo’s marvelous plan of fooling Lobelia without technically declaring Christmas war on her, he couldn’t stay mad at the big oaf of a dwarf he had brought into his home. Their first Christmas together, and Bilbo was immensely appreciative of how much Thorin was trying to learn Hobbit customs and blend in with Bilbo’s gigantic family and never-ending family drama. He already loved Frodo, which covered the essentials, but seeing Thorin learning some of the Shire Christmas carols really warmed up his heart.

And, boy, did he sing them in dwarven fashion, all low notes and rumbling voice?

It was nearly morning when Bag End was finally clear of family members. Frodo was asleep, had been asleep for hours now, and Bilbo was putting the trash out. Thorin was smoking outside, and the Sun was making the sky shine in different colours. It was now light enough to see without the aid of a lamp.

Bilbo sat down next to Thorin. “How was your first Christmas experience?”

Thorin let out the smoke and tapped the pipe down, removing the burnt leaves. “You hobbits take it very seriously. It was enjoyable.”

“Even after all the times I sent you to the market?”

“Even after the multiple lines I had to stand by.” Thorin nodded and smirked. “Now, were you consciously sending me away? I thought you were too busy that you weren’t even noticing that.”

Bilbo snickered. “I wanted to make sure we had everything in case anyone would drop by earlier than the Eve, but, in honesty… I like it. Having this domesticity between us, being able to send the mighty King of Erebor whenever I wish to buy, I don’t know, carrots and salted pork.” He laughed, shaking his head. “I don’t know, Thorin… this, this thing… it works, doesn’t it? Do you feel like it works? God, am I rambling? Sometimes I get overexcited.”

“It works.” Thorin said, making Bilbo shut up all at once. He leaned down to kiss Bilbo’s curls, the little braids he himself had put there. “I wasn’t sure I could trade rock and stone for sunny meadows and green hills, but it works.”

Bilbo stared at him. From the greying hair at his temples to the sharp tip of his nose. Wow, Bilbo thought, enamored, what a dwarf! He looked around for a second; in the next weeks the Shire would be snowy and wintery, but so far, it was only December. None of them were too fond of snow.

“Next year, maybe, we should go to Erebor. So you can teach me about your holidays.”

“It involves less fussing about unexpected relatives dropping by and more drinking competitions.” Thorin warned.

Bilbo’s nose twitched. “Then you better have some sugar and grease to help me with all that speculative drinking.”

“I will keep that in mind.”

[goldeneyedgirl]

2020 Fic Meme

It happens every year like clockwork. The Fic Round-Up Meme. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t looking forward to it this year because I’ve written so much. As usual, compiled from ancient Livejournal fic memes. I like doing it as kind of a time capsule of my writing. If anyone else wants to take a crack, feel free. I love reading writers’ throughs on their own work. <3 No tagging because that is PRESSURE. 

Twilight

12 Days of Fic-Mas (Twilight, WIP) Day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 + Christmas Eve Twelve days of fic extracts, previews, and drabbles focusing on Alice Cullen and Jess/Jasper Hale: Anathema, the KidFic, Married in Vegas, Daemons, Memento Vivere, Human Alice Kills James, Jess and Alice do Prom, Forgotten, Vampires in Vegas, Shadow to Light Missing Scene, Hybrid, Cowboys and Angel Solstice, and All These Broken Things

Afterglow (Alice/Jasper, AU, Romance, G)  There were three things of which she was certain. The first was that her name was Alice. The second was that she was born an angel. And three, she was getting ready to die.

Against a Wall (Alice/Jasper, Human/Vampire AU, Romance, Angst, PG) If you asked anyone with the surname ‘Whitlock’, they’d tell you that the family was cursed. It was the Whitlock Curse to blame the day the bank took the ranch away from Jasper’s own father.      

And Found (Alice/Jasper, Soulmark AU, Romance, PG) The soul mark appears when Alice is six. It is a twisted ribbon of a mark, from the inside of her left elbow, up her arm, over her shoulder, along her clavicle, over her right shoulder and down to her right wrist. What ugly, soulless individual could inspire such a mark?

Jar of Hearts Pt 1 Pt 2 (WIP) (Alice, Emmett, Seth, MCU xover, Angst, PG) The snap came for everyone - “He said he’d never leave me,” she says in a wobbly voice. “He promised me.”“It wasn’t by choice,” Emmett rushes to tell her. “You were his last thought; he tried so hard to get home before he…”

Never a Question (Alice/Jasper, AU, Angst, G)  Carlisle is quite sure that he’s watching his son’s heart break into a million pieces as he stares at his human mate, slowly dying alone, not a single person allowed to hold her hand.

Hand in Hand (Alice/Jasper, AU, Fluff, G)  “Never,” he swears, pressing a kiss to her cheek that makes her beam -  “There’s not a single moment I can think of that cannot be improved by your presence, darlin’.”

Love & Duty (Alice/Jasper, AU, Romance, G)  A trainee witch is sent to treat a wounded cowboy from her brother coven. 

Shadow to Light (WIP) (Alice/Jasper, AU Angst, PG) In 1918, Jasper lures the newborn known as Mary-Alice back to Monterrey. He is lost to her before it even begins. (Ch 6-8)

The Way of Things (Alice/Jasper, AU, Drama, M)  She truly doesn’t know what comes next. He truly doesn’t know if it will be good or bad. They will live this life for as long as it lasts, long may it last, surrounded by the people they love and trust. 

What You Say (Alice/Jessamine, Canon, Angst, M)  Edward might have thought Aro was their reckoning, but Alice knows for her, it is Jessamine’s hurt.

Total number of completed stories: ELEVEN. 

Total word count: 90,155 words were formally posted - not including snippets, previews (aside from FicMas) or anything that was shared on the Discord server. 

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted? I fucking nailed it. Like, seriously. THREE chapters of Shadow to Light? Every single day of JaliceWeek AND FicMas? I mean, I think the lockdown definitely helped with free time, and not going to lie, the iOS shutdown of Fortnite probably assisted my productivity. 

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? The Discord has so much to answer for. I wrote porn. Like, what. What. What. What. I find this bizarre and did not have ‘let’s just go full NC17 in 2020′ on my bingo card, but it happened. In fact, 2019 Lexie has just gone full spit-take and yelled, “WHAT?!” at the top of her lungs. 

And to make it more surprising, it’s both het and f/f porn. Like, mind-blown. Who am I anymore?

What’s your own favourite story of the year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you happiest? The Way of Things, What You Say, And Found, & Afterglow. All fics that came together really well, that felt like *me*, and had hopeful endings. I’m really proud of them. 

STL doesn’t get an opportunity to be apart of this til it’s finished. 

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them? The porn. 

Apparently, I can write it. Who knew? 

I definitely threw caution to the wind with JaliceWeek and just went for whatever crossed my mind and stopped worrying so much. Like, whatever, this is what I want to write so I will. I mean, the MCU crossover is happening in a slightly more obscure way than I initially envisaged it, it’s definitely a better fic for it.

I joined the Discord, and that’s been amazing. I’ve spent my last few fandoms existing in kind of a vacuum because of bad experiences and the fact I’m usually doing something niche, so having people to talk to who are so nice and welcoming and are happy to ignore my special brand of obnoxiousness is so lovely and has had such a good affect on my mental health. Sometimes you need people you can be your dorkiest self with. 

My instincts are pretty good as far as fic goes, people are awesome, and I can write sex scenes. It’s been a learning curve, let me tell you that. 

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the New Year?  I have to balance grad school, my business, and my writing, so that’s going to be interesting. I think I need to look at my fic more as downtime than a high-stress ‘job’ because I LOVE writing it. I love writing. I love reading. But I get in my own head and overthink. So my goals are BALANCE and RELAX. 

My best story of this year: Oh man, that’s not something I can judge. I am so incredibly proud of how Afterglow, And Found, and The Way of Things turned out. Especially considering I was so behind with JaliceWeek, and I think I was putting out a fic a day, and freaking out because I was lacking ideas, so when these three just came together exactly how I wanted them, it was a good moment. 

My most popular story: Shadow to Light. Look, if that’s my legacy to fandom, I’ve done pretty damn well. I’m really, really appreciative of how enthusiastic people are about this ‘verse. I don’t always understand it, because I can see how my writing has changed and how the story has evolved massively (first it was supposed to be a one-shot, then five chapters.) I hope that it ends up being satisfying for everyone because I have LOVED writing it, even if I am slower than molasses. 

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Everyone is always so damn enthusiastic about my writing. I think maybe Hybrid is kind of a big question mark for everyone at the moment because there are so many questions and no answers yet. 

And any of the Jessamine/Alice. That’s a new niche, I get not everyone is into it. But it’s happening and will continue into 2020.

Most fun story to write:  What You Say or Jess and Alice at Prom. Jess is a little snarkier than Jasper, less controlled, and the girls are super fun to write, even high-tension scenes. 

Most Sexy Story: Oh, I can answer this now! Um, maybe The Way of Things or Jess and Alice at Prom? Yup, those are my picks. 

Story with the single sexiest moment:  The Way of Things. This happened before the Discord Intervention, and I’m genuinely not sure if I’m happy with the end of the Prom fic, so it might be reworked slightly in the future. But The Way of Things I was really happy with because it covered so many ideas I had in a way that fit together well. 

That’s where she makes good on her unspoken promises from aeons again, of their private victory celebration. She sits astride him, her hips rolling hard against his, drawing out his groans and growls as he grips her thighs almost tight enough to crack. Their gazes are locked the entire time, her tongue skimming over her lips, as she lets her emotions tell him everything that she wants and everything she plans to take.

He remembers fucking her in the dirt in Dacia; his mouth between her legs as she hollered obscenities in a Paris attic; and the urgent, passionate loving-making of a marriage finally consummated.

She remembers bloody emeralds looped around her throat and resting between her breasts as she gets down on her knees and takes him into her mouth, his fingers tangled in her hair; the delicious weight of him on top of her, their sweat mingling and cooling in the frozen night as their flimsy bed creaked against the wall; and his soft encouragement in her ear as he grasps her around the waist, their hands resting together on the gentle swell of her stomach. 

Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story: I think I restrained myself from anything too dark or twisted this year, actually. Oh, wait, Vampires in Vegas. That one has some pretty dark implications about Alice’s life, about the vampire underworld, and Jasper’s behaviour, especially as it goes one. No fic that deals with someone being put into sex work without educated consent is going to avoid being dark, and I think it’s logical that vampires would have their hands in a lot of illegal yet profitable areas. 

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: Anything with Jessamine/Alice because, like, Jess isn’t a name-swap of Jasper, and the relationship dynamic shifts with the slight personality shifts. And then you have to consider the family and social dynamic of two women in the relationship, so working all that out was fun. 

Jar of Hearts is another one, because I had to work out who the fic was going to follow and what was lost. And Emmett and Alice pretty much don’t interact in canon, but they were chosen for a reason. I’ve stripped them down to their worst, most isolated selves without their ‘true north’ (Rose and Jasper) or their moral center (Carlisle and Esme), or even their secret weapon (Edward). Seth, too, has been isolated from his family and friends, and is especially ‘other’ in this situation. This is an MCU crossover, so we’re kind of following a heroes’ journey with the last of Forks’ supernatural creatures.

Hardest story to write: Shadow to Light because of the way I have to use language, because of the plot strands from canon when I hate writing canon material, and how the characters have changed and how this new version reflects the old version. 

Against a Wall, as well, because of the in-verse time crunch I had - I needed Jasper damaged, military-minded, and changed by age 19. And I needed the boy broken. I’m happy with it, the story is done and dusted, but it didn’t quite turn out how I planned. And that’s okay, because I like this version. But I think I tackled something a lot bigger than I anticipated with it. 

Most disappointing:  Look, I love the verse and the set-up, but I think Love & Duty could do with another 2k words for build-up. I just ran out of time, honestly, to build up that mutual attraction between Alice and Jasper. 

Easiest story to write: Anathema, because Alice’s voice was so clear in it. Anathema!Alice knows exactly who she is, and that’s always fun. And the Shadow to Light Missing Scene; it wasn’t as long as I hoped, but it turned out exactly as I imagined it happening. 

Biggest surprise:  Everyone really, really liked Forgotten. And Vampires in Vegas, which I honestly thought were the weakest offerings during FicMas. 

Most unintentionally telling story:  The Way of Things. There’s so little dialogue, and it’s covering such a massive amount of time and story that it’s intentionally written to tell. 

Story I’d like to revise: Love & Duty, and Married in Vegas. A little polish, a little shine, it’s fine. For Love & Duty, it’s definitely the time crunch I need to go back and fix; for Married in Vegas, it’s just reflective of how long ago I started it. I’m a better writer, I know the characters more, and I’m less prone to overly dramatic plot twists. 

Story I didn’t write but will at some point, I swear: Look, let me lay the groundwork now so that no one who isn’t on the Discord isn’t startled. 

There’s going to be a Jess/Jasper/Alice threesome fic, and I regret nothing. 

I really, really want to get All These Broken Things redone and posted because it’s getting silly how long it’s just been sitting there. 

I want to actually write Monster, which is a fic I don’t talk about much but I want to write. It’s a question about who the monster of the story is, and I’m not sure I’m as skilled as I should be, to write it, but I want to try. 

And one of my numerous attempts at a Haunted House Cryptid fic. It has to happen, I have so many ideas!

[yichens]

🐰 🐇 Hi fr Classy Cultiva! Reply: I love recs! & lists that aren’t to-do lists😁 I never heard of Jaymes Young b4 but bought albums which I’ll listen to once CQL is outta my head, maybe in 5 yrs 😂| Once I opened my phone to show a coworker sthg, it opened right to a fic & my heart dropped. Pretty sure I scrolled away fast enuf but who knows O_o but maybe he had no idea what he saw, if anything eep I <3 jrs! Ooh NHS is def top runner up to the ladies. Gotta stay on Machiavelli’s good side 1/2

wzc is v cute, seems v sweet, always smiling! That pic of him holding a dog [on chaos sisters set I think?] is just like 2 puppies | oh man so many things to watch! ~~It’s a neverending queue~~ havent watched guardian but seen it on dashboard a lot | Q11: what’s ur fave story arc? or fave ep/moment? Some of mine are: FAMILY LUNCH DATE SO SOFT, golden core reveal soooo sadddd so pretty lwj tears 😭 drunky lwj also very good. I made a huge list for my other cc, will share in 9 days! \o/ 2/2

hello again! ^^ I’ll wish you merry christmas and happy holidays now bc I dunno how much I’ll be around to answer things during these next few days :’D I hope you enjoy your time!

oh, I hope you enjoy jaymes young then! when you get there that is :’D his feel something album is maybe my favorite so I hope you get time to listen to that ^^

aahh yeah, I feel you on that one :’D I usually leave my fics open in the background so that I don’t accidentally shove them at ppl’s faces just for this reason XD am a bit paranoid like that krhm... but I doubt that if ppl look at that stuff very quickly they really get what’s going on, especially if they don’t read stuff like that themselves ^^’ 

gosh I feel like I’ve seen way too many pics of wzc with dogs or his cat ;; pets always seem to make him extra bright and sweet haha. so maybe if we spent time together we could also just pet a ton of animals XD it would be nice, I really miss petting any soft furs ;; 

and ah, I hope you can watch guardian too then :’D the drama has its weak points but the acting is great and it really brings out all the feels! and all the shots look super pretty imo :o it’s also the first chinese bl novel I ended up reading bc I was curious about the original story (the story gets very much twisted in the drama bc of censorship) and it blew me away! it was so cool :o even if I do like zhao yunlan and shen wei in the drama more ^^’ 

and then to answer your question for this time: I could say my favorite story arc is the xuanwu cave one? I like the moments with wen clan before that (the pining between wangxian, both of them being self-sacrificing idiots, wwx being obnoxious and all types of hilarious despite making jc’s blood pressure peak, the “let me carry you” -moment and wwx just being super soft for lwj) and then the fight itself (the beginning of yiling patriarch! the mystery at that moment is so great!) and after that the moments wangxian have together in the cave (the mianmian convo, lwj looking ready to smack wwx, wwx falling sick and wangxian/wuji!)  my other one would probably be the destruction of lotus pier bc of my love for jc ;; that arc is super, super painful to watch bc so much gets destroyed but it is also so well made and really lets out all of the yun siblings’ characters. I always applaud the way wzc and xz have acted their parts when jc goes mad with anger and grief and wwx tries to hold him back. I love the symbolism of yanli’s bell? jade ornament? breaking when their parents die. I love the moments before this when all of the three are tied together with zidian and just look utterly scared and have to watch their parents sacrifice themselves (and I can’t stop staring at the way jc and wwx are holding hands like their life depends on that bc yes, they would, they are in this together after all). I love the short moment in the inn where the yun siblings have just lost it all and wwx is trying to hold things together. I loved knowing about jc’s sacrifice and then him getting caught and wn helping them and wwx being the best brother. I love the moments with wen siblings when jc is recovering, and wzc just does amazing as jc who has lost all hope and his will to live. and the core exchange moment is so damn painful but I always grow so warm over wwx’s deep love for his brother and jc’s smile when he discovers that his core is working again. it’s a wonderful arc, crafted so very well, even if it’s so painful that I always just sob my eyes out for it. 

am happy you chose a bit softer arcs :’D tho yeah, I gotta agree that the golden core reveal is a wonderful arc too. it’s just one of those moments where I feel very conflicted bc I just wish to yell at everyone involved XD they are all being amazing but there is just. so much miscommunication? especially when wwx is unconscious and can’t really say anything for himself. I wish for group therapy, my god. please talk with each other. especially the yun brothers should just. sit down and talk and not be like this smh

am excited to hear more about your thoughts later on ^^ am enjoying all of this so much heh. see you again! ��

[healinghurtssometimes]

The Cycle (Pt. 1)

I’m not really sure where to start, so I’m going to opt for my current situation and how I got here. This blog isn’t meant for attention, but rather a way for me to get my experiences out in the open. Maybe some people will find this, relate, and somehow become my tribe. Let me tell you, I need good people. If you stick around long enough, I’m certain you’ll quickly start to see that. With that being said, I’m going to start with a very rough outline of the past 14-15 months.

For just a brief back story, I got offered the best paying job I’d ever had in January of 2017. A lot of stuff had happened (which I’ll cover another time) and I would have been stupid not to take the job when it was given to me. After 2 years, I got my Real Estate License since the company required it for all Property Managers, and I got promoted. The problem was that we were used to running our office with 3 Admins - one had been taken to fit a different role months earlier and still hadn’t been replaced, and I was the second one to be moved while the company STILL did not make an attempt to refill those roles until AFTER my promotion was finalized. I got stuck doing my job as an Admin AND my new job as a Property Manager with all training put on hold until those roles were filled, while also being expected to heavily assist in training the new Admins they hired since I had been there longer than the last Admin standing and was damn good at my job.

I then spent months filling multiple roles, being asked to train people coming into the new roles (including another Property Manager when I STILL wasn’t trained), and being asked regularly to go out of my way to do things face-to-face with/for my residents that was not being asked of my peers (many of which took up a substantial amount of time, like delivering portable AC units and having to walk through someone’s whole house with our Field Manager for maintenance complaints that I had no authority over). I BEGGED for help getting the new Admin team to fulfill the tasks I was trying to delegate to them, begged for training, begged for clarity on expectations that were never laid out. I begged for help for 6 months, and was consistently met with “we don’t have the resources,” “we aren’t properly staffed,” “there isn’t time,” etc. I was buried up to my nose from the day I took the position, and not one person agreed to help me dig myself out of the dirt. Instead, they buried me and then fired me for not being able to fulfill the role to their expectations (while the other two Property Managers weren’t expected to do ANY of the extra stuff they’d put on me to deal with). That was early September 2019. I filed for unemployment, and my now-former supervisor dug up information from my role as an Admin that had been approved by the District Manager at the time until they both got in trouble for letting me slightly stagger my schedule to make sure I could take care of my kids and be able to pay my rent after a HUGE change in the custody and child support of my children (a situation I’ll cover at another time). I didn’t get the notice letter for the unemployment appeal meeting until after it had taken place, about a week before Christmas, at which point I was VERY depressed, stressed, and couldn’t begin to fathom taking on a multi-million dollar company on my own. I now owe the state almost $900 in “overpaid unemployment benefits” that I have yet to be able to pay back.

I spent the next few months trying to find another job. Hoping to find something still in the world of Property Management, even if it wasn’t the same role or anywhere near the same pay or if it didn’t come with the same benefits. The company I worked for is well-known and very disliked by the ENTIRE property management community in the area I lived in at the time. They’re a very young company that is buying up houses left and right and helping make rent prices SOAR for those that aren’t able to buy a house (or just like renting instead of owning the home they live in for whatever reason) - they make it their goal year over year to increase renewal rates as much as they can get away with, knowing many people won’t do the research, question their numbers, or walk away from their house...they’ll just pay the rent increase and keep moving through their complaints of how high their rent is for the lack of improvements the company makes and their poor excuse of a maintenance department that’s directed to penny-and-dime every vendor and look for any reason the resident could possibly be held responsible for higher priced maintenance items. They’re in 20 different states and their maintenance department for their entire operation runs out of ONE state with a local “liaison” at each office that’s function is only for vacant homes. Hopefully they’ve changed some of this in the past year, but I don’t have any reason to believe they would have made things better for anything outside of their own bottom line. I won’t use their name because I don’t want to get sued, but if you know, you know.

I had to take the name of the company off of my resume, replaced with the word “Confidential,” in order to start getting call backs for interviews with other property management companies...all of which ended up being for apartment complexes where I was used to single-family and the two worlds are vastly different from one another. I had ONE company that actually offered me a job sometime around October/November 2019, and it turned out to be an absolutely awful situation to be in. They lied about what they offered for health insurance in my interview, treated their residents like garbage, their property manager played favorites and treated other staff like they were incompetent toddlers, leasing staff and maintenance weren’t allowed to communicate with each other outside of breaks and absolute emergencies, and operated with a LOT of drama. One situation got brought into our leasing office (while open to the public) where their outsourced IT guy and management proceeded to yell at each other in the lobby, calling each other things like “fucking liars” and just generally making a big scene, which made me incredibly uncomfortable to be around. I was already dealing with not having my much-needed anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medications, and the way this company was operated was making my already spiraling mental health WORSE. So after a few weeks, I left knowing that they were not a good fit for me nor I for what they apparently needed. I applied for literally hundreds of jobs, got a few interviews, and never got offered another position.

All this time, I’m just trying to figure out how I’m going to pay my rent (my now ex-boyfriend’s parents were paying our $1500 monthly rent and all of our utilities at this point so we wouldn’t get evicted with my kids), how I’m going to pay my phone bill or my car payment, dealing with being uninsured and ashamed of the situation I was in, debt piling up all around me with no way out of it, no health insurance, battling withdrawal from my heavy dosage of SSRI drugs. I know I haven’t talked much about them here, but all of this was really starting to affect my children - who were only 5 & 7 at the time - which was really making the entire situation SO MUCH WORSE to deal with. I was self medicating with marijuana and was high 98% of the time, or in the process of getting high. While weed by itself is not an addictive drug, I developed a dependency on it like I had come to depend on my mental health medications, because it was numbing the reality of the situation I was in and helping keep me somewhat functional and kept me from falling deeper into the darkness as my world crumbled around me.

At the end of January, I finally decided that I couldn’t justify staying in the place I’d lived my whole life anymore. I had lost my job, all of my income, my health insurance...I was on the brink of losing my car, my relationship was failing due to financial strain (though I was also done with the relationship beforehand and started cheating on him before I lost my job anyway and was really only with him at that point for convenience...not a moment I’m proud of by any means), I wasn’t able to support myself or my kids and was no longer able to hide the situation from them for what it was. The only thing I was able to protect them from was KNOWING I was always high, which I’m sure from my own experience with my parents, they’ll end up figuring out when they’re older and weed is legal across the board. So I started thinking “what’s next, how do I change this situation?” 

By January 2020, I’d been back in contact with an old high school boyfriend for a number of months. Not only was he an old boyfriend, but he was also one of my best friends in the whole world. I trusted him with every fiber of my being, he is the only soul that knows me the way he does, and he has stuck by my side through all of the mud trudging I’ve gone through since I was 15 other than our own disastrously messy breakup. He was roughly 400 miles away from my hometown, and was the only viable option for me to ask for help in the form of a roof to look for work and try to get myself back up on my feet. So I took my kids to their dad (who is a very petty and ugly human) because he is/was at least financially stable, packed a few things, and went looking for work 400 miles away. 3 days in, I was offered a menial serving job...but hey, working on 6 months of no consistent job or income, it was better than what I was working with back home. I started that job the end of February. For anyone that’s been alive this year, you know what’s coming next...4 weeks later, the restaurant was shut down for COVID lockdowns, and I immediately started looking for another job to take on once those shutdowns were lifted. So now, I’m 400 miles away from my kids and my family, and I’m also unemployed.

I thought I found one doing leasing with an apartment complex. I got the job offer, the offer letter, was working on finalizing a start date even though some of their requirements were ridiculous (like not being able to how any semblance of a tattoo or piercing not in your ear and only being able to wear black and white on the job). Then I asked what they were doing to protect their employees, residents, and potential residents from COVID. I lost that opportunity for asking questions, because they were the ONLY complex locally that was not observing any pandemic-related precautions, and had referred to a colleague as a “titty baby” for simply asking them to step up their game by providing hand sanitizer and a thermometer for their offices. I opted not to go back to serving over precautions for COVID so I could still go home and see my kids again at my dad’s house, as my step-mom was dealing the return of her Breast Cancer after nearly 2 years in remission and no way of getting treatment until the doctors decided it was safe again for her to be in a hospital or cancer treatment center.

Realizing now that I’ve only gotten to sometime around April/May, I’m going to leave this post for now and come back for a Part 2. If you’re still reading this and are planning on returning for the next installment, thank you for taking this journey with me as I lay my life out one piece at a time in the hopes of healing.

[13-reasons-ideas]

How did I just now stumble across your blog?!! It’s awesome and your Monty story is top notch. Would u take a request that isn’t from a prompt list but my own idea instead? If so can u pls do a Monty x reader where the reader’s ex boyfriend moves back to town and Monty feels threatened by him because personality wise he’s a polar opposite and fears that she might get back together with him (because they were once in love) but the reader ensures Monty that it’ll never happen❤️

Hey, of course you can!  Sorry this took so long. I was having some issues with inspiration and work has been super busy. Here it is. I hope you like it! It ended up way longer than I intended it to. 

(Y/N) = your name  (Y/L/N)= your last name

FISTICUFFS AND DARTMOUTH 

I never expected Nathan and I to break up. He was my first love and though naïve, you never really expect it to end. Our romance was one of shared interests and common goals and kind love. We did not fight and we pushed each other to achieve our goals. We knew what we wanted and what we needed to do in order to get it. He was the first boy I’d ever fallen in love with. It wasn’t a whirlwind, but it was, in a word, nice. Our love story was nice. Which is probably why when he moved away from Crestmont to Dallas for his Dad’s new job, it didn’t affect me the way everyone expected. People expected me to be crushed, but while I was sad, I was able to continue without much impact to my life. And they certainly did not expect me to fall for the man I did after he left. I did not even expect it myself. Although, Montgomery De La Cruz is not someone you expect to fall for.

Nathan Martin is put together and driven. He has it all figured out. He has dreams of going to an Ivy League school and being a doctor who discovers the next medical breakthrough. But those dreams aren’t just unattainable ideas. He has the grades and the work ethic to achieve his goals. He is the guy that the good girl brings home to dad and dad praises him and invites him to watch the game on Sunday, even though the boy has no interest in sports. He goes to the game on Friday nights because he needs a break from studying, not because he actually cares about who wins or loses. Nathan is the boy your mom pictures when she sees your wedding or prays you will meet and love when she thinks of your future. He is kind and avoids physical conflict in any situation. He truly believes that there is a diplomatic way to resolve any issue that could lead to physical conflict. Nathan is the kind of boy who would leave this little town for school but come back after he is done and have the white picket fence life. He wants the wife and the two kids and the dog. He is the kid who spends time with his family because they actually like each other. He is the boy everyone expects me to go for.

           Montgomery De La Cruz is the opposite of Nathan in many ways. He is not the boy who has dreams to change the world. He only wants to change his world. He is not the boy who avoids conflict. In fact, he actively seeks it out. He is the boy you bring home to piss your dad off. He is arrogant and isn’t afraid to argue and hurt your feelings. He plays ball because it’s his ticket out of this little town. Montgomery is the boy who will graduate, go to school, and those of us still here will be lucky if he comes back to visit once a year for the holidays. He is the boy who doesn’t want to plan a life with someone because he is still trying to figure it out for himself. He is the rough and tumble kid who has family problems and spends as little time at home as possible. He is everything I shouldn’t want. And yet, he is everything I want.

           Nathan moved in the middle of sophomore year. His Dad got a job in Dallas at a larger law firm just after Christmas, and by mid-January they had left Crestmont behind. Our breakup wasn’t one of drama and rumors nor was it full of animosity and he said she said. It was simply that neither of us were in a place where we felt up to doing long distance. I laid low for a while and threw myself into writing during my free time. That is how Montgomery came tumbling into my life- literally. I was sitting by a tree working on some writing on a slow day at the beginning of junior year. I heard someone yell, when suddenly I was being tripped on and pushed over by a larger boy. I was disoriented at first but then I saw the tell-tale plaid shirt. “Montgomery! Watch it.” I exclaimed, surprised as I watched my notebook go flying through the air.

           “Sorry Doll. I yelled for you to watch out. Not my fault you weren’t listening.” He replied, chuckling. I simply rolled my eyes at him before gathering my notebook and dusting myself off. Picking up my bag, I nodded to him as I walked away. “See you around?” He called after me.

           “Maybe. It’s a little town De La Cruz.” I called back.

Its not like I didn’t know about Montgomery De La Cruz. Everyone at Liberty knew about the short-tempered athlete. We all knew about the fights with Alex. And the fights with Tyler or anyone else he felt like fighting. We had English and History together and since Nathan left, my friends had started dragging me to various games, so I had seen him on the field more than once. But after that ever so graceful accident, I started to notice him around town or school more. He was usually accompanied by Bryce and his teammates but there were times you could find him on his own. One such occasion was at Monet’s on a dreary day, unusual for California. He walked in while I was ordering another hot cocoa. “You struck me as more of a three cups of coffee a day kind of person.” I heard him say from behind me.

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me De La Cruz.” I responded after I placed my order.

“What can I get you Montgomery?” Skye asked, obviously using her best customer voice, to mask her desire to tell him where he could shove it.

“I’ll have what she’s having.” He replied smoothly. I could feel him smirking at me during the quick exchange. After our orders were put through and made, I made my back way to my favourite table at the back of the cafe. Skye usually had it reserved for me because of the view of the rest of the shop. I was not expecting Monty to follow me, nor was I expecting him to pull up a chair for himself.

“Uh… can I help you?” I asked, confused as I set to my writing trying to ignore him watching me.

“What are you working on?” he asked, trying to glance at my notes.

“Writing.” I replied, shortly. He laughed at my answer prompting me to glance up and give him a ‘what’ look.

“I see that (Y/N). I meant what are you writing?” He retorted.

“Stuff. Now are you going to sit there and ask me stupid questions, or is there something I can actually do for you Montgomery?” I replied, hoping to all hopes he would take the hint and leave me alone. Unfortunately, he did not get the hint. Instead, he took it as an invitation to remain seated and continue to distract me. Several annoying questions later I finally snapped. “Okay Montgomery. That is enough. I am trying to focus, so if you want to stay, then you have a choice. Either sit there and shut up or get up and kindly leave me alone.” I huffed. His brows shot up in surprise at my outburst. After a brief pause, I shook my head to say ‘well?’.

“Alright. I’ll be quiet. You wont even notice I’m here.” He replied and made a zipping motion across his lips.

“Thank you.” I sighed and got back to work.

After some time, I went to take a sip of my cocoa and noticed it was empty. Before I could get up and ask for another, Monty took the cup from my hand and went back to Skye. When he returned, I set my pen down and looked at him questioningly. “Consider it a peace offering. I have to head out but this was… nice.” He said before gathering his letterman and turning to leave.

“Monty wait a second.” I called after him. He paused, turning his head to look at me. “See you around?”

“Maybe. It’s a little town (Y/L/N).” he replied, smirking.

That became our routine. He would happen upon the little coffee shop after I arrived, order what I got for himself, and he would sit to watch me write for a while before heading out for the day. We would still see each other at school and in class, but we never spoke of our time at Monet’s together. I’m not sure when it morphed into something more, but one day he asked me out for coffee and I decided to accept. By the next week, we had made it official and at school found out. We grew closer to each other and I became friends with some of his friends. Scott and I connected quickly and while it caused some issues initially, Scott was able to make Monty understand that it was nothing more than friendship. Things were going very well. We had talked about Nathan and everything seemed to be sorted out in that regard. Or at least I thought it had.

No one expected Nathan to come back to Crestmont until he was at least done his bachelor’s degree. Certainly not after only just over a year and a half. I heard whispering that October day of senior year as I walked from my car to the school. The whispers died down as I passed so I figured Montgomery had gotten into yet another fight. That was one thing I was never really able to help him get a handle on. However, when I saw Monty down the hall and searched his face for bruises or anything, I saw he looked fine and knew that couldn’t be what prompted the whispers. Though not bruised he did look conflicted. Monty simply slung his arm over my shoulder when I got to him and we walked to my locker. Something was definitely off I just couldn’t put my finger on what it was exactly. It wasn’t until I walked into Biology and saw him sitting in our usual seat that it made sense. Nathan was back. I knew that the few kids in class already were watching with bated breath, waiting to see what I did, so I walked confidently and sat in my usual seat beside Nathan and greeted him politely. Due to the lack of animosity in our breakup, we were easily able to make small talk until the teacher started class.

After what could only be described as a very long and tiring day, Montgomery and I were in my bedroom studying, or rather I was trying to study on the floor, and he was tapping his pen against his paper while sitting on my bed. “Is there something bothering you Monty? Or are you trying to tap a hole through your textbook?” I asked him, distracted by his incessant tapping.

“He’s   back…” He said, hesitating to continue.

           “Yeah.” I respond, not bothering to look up from my assignment.

           “Yeah? That’s all you have to say (Y/N)?”

           “Yeah, I know? He’s in my AP Biology class.” I expand, still trying to work out the answer.

           “You seem awful nonchalant about it.” Montgomery countered.

           “Am I not supposed to be?” At this point I look up and push my work aside.

           “I don’t know. You tell me. Do you have a reason not to be?” Monty beings to sit up as I stand.

           “Montgomery, where is this all coming from?”

           “Nathan is back (Y/N). So there’s no reason to keep pretending here.”

           “Pre-Pretending? What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I ask, somewhat insulted.

           “Yes pretending. You can stop pretending you care and go back to him now.” He retorts, his voice beginning to rise.

           “And why pray tell, would I go back to Nathan now that he’s back in town?” I question, my voice also beginning to rise.

           “Because (Y/N).” He states, as though that is an actual reason.

           “Because why Montgomery? That’s not an explanation and you know it.”

             “He’s all Dartmouth and Harvard medical school and volunteering to tutor kids. He has an actual plan for his life (Y/N). Nathan is going to be a fucking doctor for God’s sake. I’m all football, baseball, and fisticuffs.” Montgomery argued.

           “And?” I ask, confused about where he is going with this.

           “And? And you’re the good girl who smiles at everyone, not because it is polite, but because you actually want to. You sit and read books while I dick around with the guys at lunch. You get good grades and you care about school. I get the bare minimum to stay on the team. You’re… perfect. You could leave any time. You loved him then, you can love him again. I wouldn’t blame you. I have ball and he has fucking med school. I have a full ride scholarship and he has actual grades.”

           “Montgomery, we have been over this. You aren’t the guy I brought home to fill the time until Nathan came back. If I wanted to be with him, I would have left as soon as he came back. I am still here. Therefore, I do not want to be with Nathan.” I explain, exasperated.

           “He can give you what you want. He can give you everything you want.”

           “Mont-” I start but he cuts me off.

           “(Y/N). You want to be a writer and spend your days curled up at your desk. You love books and you’re nice to people and you don’t have rude or angry bone in your body. I have anger and I want to play ball and get through school so I can leave this crappy little town behind. He can give you the life you want. He can go to work and save lives while you sit in your nook in the office, writing to your hearts content.”

           “Maybe I don’t want that anymore Montgomery. Maybe I want you. And the life you can give me.”

           “Don’t kid yourself. He’s everything I’m not. We are polar opposites. You’ll get bored or have enough of me eventually.” He told me, crossing his arms.

           “Montgomery de la Cruz. Do you honestly believe that? I like that you’re nothing like Nathan. That’s the point isn’t it? I like that you’re… unpredictable and temperamental and yeah, sometimes you make really bad decisions. But you’re also caring and protective and spontaneous. I would never leave you for Nathan.” I paused, walking towards him to take his hands in mine. I reached up to tilt his head down towards me before continuing, “I love you Montgomery.” I told him quietly.

           “I- you- what?” He stuttered, shocked at my admission.

           “I love you.” I repeated looking up at him sincerely.

           “I love you to (Y/N).” he responded leaning down to kiss me gently. I smiled into the kiss before pulling away.

           “So no more arguing about Nathan?” I asked him, giggling.

           “I guess not. But maybe a few more kisses will fully convince me.” He replied before kissing me again. I felt him start to step forwards and my knees hit my mattress before we fell back onto my bed. We spent the next couple of hours cuddling and talking before falling asleep in each other’s arms contentedly, our homework and any discussion of Nathan long forgotten.

[northsidemarleyrose]

Marley 2.0 Intro

01.  BASICS

Full Name: Marley Alexandria Rose Nickname: Marls Sex/Gender: Cisfemale Birthday: June 24, 1994 Age: 25 Astrological Sign: Cancer Occupation: Pop’s Chocklit’ Shop, occasionally working at the bookstore. Spoken Languages: English Sexual Orientation: Demisexual/Panromantic Birthplace: Riverdale, Northside Relationship status: Single

02. PHYSICAL TRAITS

Hair Color/Style: Long, dark brown, often left down except when she’s working at Pop’s.  Eye Color: Blue Face Claim: Melissa Benoist Height: 5′8 Weight: 130lbs Tattoos: N/A Piercings: Ears Unique Attributes: Scar above her left eyebrow. Defining Gestures/Movements: Fidgets with her fingers when she’s nervous/stressed/anxious. Posture: Good.

03. PERSONALITY TRAITS

Pet Peeves: Dishonesty, ignorance, rudeness, chewing sounds, cheating of any kind Hobbies/Interests: Singing, baking, dancing, writing Special Skills/Abilities: Singing Likes: Chocolate, Christmas, surprises, sunsets, music, Disney, Greys Anatomy, Supernatural. Dislikes: Silence, giving up, being wrong, mushrooms, alcoholism. Insecurities: The fact that she had family hidden from her for her whole life, her weight/eating disorder Quirks/Eccentricities: She’s easily stressed and nervous, it usually manifests in fidgeting, no longer meeting someones eyes, and possibly a major loss of appetite. Strengths: Smart, sweet, persistent, able to multitask Weaknesses: Naive, Overly Trusting, Low Self-esteem. Speaking Style: Quick. Temperament: Excitable

04. FAMILY & HOME

Immediate Family: Her mother, Millie Rose, father, Daniel Richardson, twin sister Charlie Richardson, and younger half-siblings, Christopher and Caroline Richardson. How do they feel about their family? Family used to be really simple for Marley. She’d grown up with her mom and they were as close as two people could be. Her mother had been her hero. She’d also known she had been a twin once upon a time but her mother had said the other little girl, the first one, had been a stillborn. She’d also been told her father had left town when she was a baby. When Marley was a teenager she’d discovered that hadn’t been true and that her father was a drunken Southsider and her sister had grown up on the Southside with him. She hadn’t been able to process the information well and this led to a huge blowout with her mother but they’ve since been working on mending the relationship. Marley has a hard time trusting anyone because of this. She resents her father for not reaching out as well but there’s something about him that she can’t entirely hate. She’d always wanted her dad growing up, wondering why he’d just left. 

She loves her siblings a lot, all of them had no part in the lies and she could never hold Charlie, Christopher, or Caroline accountable for their parents’ choices. While she doesn’t entirely get her sister all the time, and has only known her since she was 18, she’d do anything for her and the same goes for Christopher and Caroline. Sometimes Marley feels like it’s them against the world. How does their family feel about them?: Her mother feels very guilty about the lies but she felt it was better. She is constantly working at repairing the damage.

Daniel, or Danny as she has now learned he prefers, is fairly indifferent towards Marley, that of course unless he needs anything from her.

Both Christopher and Caroline love Marley a lot, it’s really hard not to and Marley will bend over backwards for them and they would gladly do the same.

Charlie didn’t trust Marley in the beginning, there was a good amount of resentment and jealousy on top of the lack of trust. All that being said, it’s been a while and Marley has proven to Charlie she’s worthy and she’s family and Charlie is just as protective of Marley as she is of Christopher and Caroline. You can hardly tell they didn’t grow up as a unit. Pets: None. Where do they live?: Northside, with Bethany in the apartment above the bookstore. Description of their home: Apartment above the bookstore. 3 bedrooms. Not huge but spacious enough for her to share with Bethany. Description of their bedroom: Tidy, many knicknacks in their place. Lots of colour.

05. THIS OR THAT

Introvert or Extrovert? Optimist or Pessimist? Leader or Follower? Confident or Self-Conscious? Cautious or Careless? Religious or Secular? Passionate or Apathetic? Book Smarts or Street Smarts? Compliments or Insults? Pajamas or Lingerie?

06. FAVORITES

Favorite Color: Sky Blue/Purple Favorite Clothing Style/Outfit: She loves sweaters and scarves, will dress in them the minute there is a chill.  Favorite Bands/Songs/Type of Music: A little bit of everything but she’s a pretty big TSwift fan. Along with anything from Broadway. She also can’t help but love P!nk. Favorite Movies: Always a sucker for something Disney or romantic. She also adores anything with Brie Larson ever since Captain Marvel, Harry Potter. Favorite Books: Harry Potter, A Little Princess, Handle With Care. Favorite Foods/Drinks: Chocolate, Pizza, Milkshakes Favorite Sports/Sports Teams: N/A Favorite Time of Day: Breakfast time. Favorite Weather/Season: She finds something she loves about every season but Fall has her heart.  Favorite Animal: Dogs

07. MISCELLANEOUS

Fears/Superstitions: Heights. Political Views: Left. Addictions: Chocolate. Best School Subject: Drama, but academically, Maths. Worst School Subject: She did really well overall but science was a little difficult School Clubs/Sports: Glee club How does she get money? Working at Pop’s and the bookstore. How is she with technology? Fairly decent.

08. PAST & FUTURE

Fondest Memory: The first time Charlie really hugged her. A hug she knew wasn’t just an obligation and was free of the distrust Marley had been so used to picking up. Deepest, Darkest Secret: Developing an eating disorder in her senior year due to finding out that her entire life was a lie and never telling anyone about it. She hides it now with her love of food, but the idea of throwing it up, or not eating, arises in times of stress. Dream Vacation: New York City - Broadway Best thing that has ever happened to this character: Even if it took a while to get used to, finding Charlie, Christopher, and Caroline. They’re her family, no matter how long it took. Worst thing that has ever happened to this character: Her eating disorder and the conflicts that caused it. What do they want to be when they grow up?: Secretly, a singer on the radio. Perfect Date: Something so romantic it could be in a movie.

09. HEADCANONS

Growing up on the Northside, Marley did grow up with some privilege but she definitely wasn’t as well off as other families who happened to live on this side of the tracks. Being the only child of a single parent made Marley stick out as opposed to a lot of her classmates growing up and Marley wouldn't have admitted it, but she always caught herself daydreaming about the dad that left and the sister she never had.

Because she works at Pop’s which is in a pretty neutral area, Marley has ended up befriending people from the North and South side alike. She sees past where people are from or what gang they happen to be in. Some may call her naive, but she sees herself as just a good person.

Marley used to be a person who’d take most of what anyone said as truthful, sarcasm aside of course, but when she found out her mother had lied to her her whole life she developed a plethora of trust issues. To her luck, she’s worked through a lot of them but generally isn’t as trusting as she used to be.

During her senior year of high school, Marley had a project about family history and instead of bothering her mom about that, something she’d given up on long ago, she decided to look into it herself and with that she found Danny and then Charlie, Christopher, and Caroline. She immediately confronted her mother and had it out with her, yelling and tears galore. The fight ended with Marley leaving, slamming the door like the dramatic person she is, and staying the next couple nights with her best friend.

During this time Marley was barely eating, something new to her, and when she did eat, she could often be found throwing it back up. She lost some weight but most people just complimented her, which she didn’t know how to feel about. She kept her secrets to herself, not telling a soul, and as things with Charlie and the younger twins settled out, Marley did her best to deal with her ED on her own, using her stubborness against herself. Because she never truly dealt with her disorder, it can pop up from time to time when she gets too overwhelmed.

Marley has a bit of an issue with people who are frequently drinking because of her father. Sure, she can be found with a bottle of wine every now and then but if there came a time, she could give it up if she wanted.

Marley isn’t quite never been kissed, she was a theatre kid, but she’s never had a relationship and has certainly never had sex. Marley has also known that she wasn’t straight from a young age, and told her mom when she was 15. Millie was completely fine with it, only caring that Marley find someone who loves her for all of who she is.

[andrewuttaro]

New Look Sabres: GM 43 - NJD - Exorcise and Celly

It was a rainy night in Buffalo and dread was in the air among the spires of downtown Buffalo. The Sabres were a fright since Christmas and could hardly tame cats. The absolute fright seemed to reach its peak when the Devils incarnate came to town: often the torturers of Key Bank Center crowds they had not lost in Buffalo since April fool’s Day 2014. No, not tonight, for tonight was a different night: tonight would be the night a silver sabre was stabbed into the heart of the beast. Tonight… or last night now… would be an exorcism. Enough of the theatrics: there was a kid in the row behind me who was no older than 8 who repeatedly hollered obscure stats from NHL 19. We’ll be calling him Chel kid for this blog post. Chel kid was a few seats down from Loudmouth. Loudmouth only kind of knew he was at a hockey game yelling about drama of his family and friends to the two rather fetching women at either side of him. Chel kid and Loudmouth had a rollercoaster game. This is all to say I was at this game. I’ve been at both wins since Christmas so… maybe buy me tickets if you really like this team? There might be some rich trust fund baby in Amherst who might take me up on that. Nonetheless, demons were sorta exorcised in this game. In the second period it was a regular Tae-Bo session! Yes, that was a play on words pun and Tae-Bo was basically Zumba before Zumba was popularized, kids. Is this going to be six paragraphs of this guy making exorcism and exercise jokes? The answer is yes; today we celebrate because it’s been a rough go of it for the Sabres these last few games. We’re going to Exorcise and Celly today! Exorcise and Celly with Chel Kid and Loudmouth because the Sabres have perhaps their most compelling win since November in this tilt with the Devils of Newark.

The first period really only exists in this game to remind us of what this club has not been doing well. Passes, zone entries and secondary scoring did not come in the first. That said, it wasn’t a horror show either. It started out sour. Blake Coleman redirects a puck clumsily around Carter Hutton he had received from Miles Wood. Two thoughts on this goal: Miles Wood looks way to handsome to live in Newark, like no offense Newark but that City is what New Yorkers mean when they talk trash about New Jersey; and second: that goal should’ve been stopped by Hutton screened or not. If anyone was screening him it was Sabotka who was not even in his line of sight as the puck crosses the ice to Coleman. The first period ended 1-0 Devils but not before guys like Tage Thompson and Sam Reinhart really begin to lay it on. Do note that the Sabres outshot the Devils for the entirety of this game in spite of the visitors getting many more opportunities there. Loudmouth was really raising the decibel level as the first goes on, not for the Sabres but apparently because one of the women he was with told a very meandering story about how her sister was throwing a fit about having to work on her birthday. All the power to ya girl but do you find Loudmouth shattering ear drums for ten seats around in every direction attractive? Jeff Skinner got some hot opportunities in the first and Chel Kid made sure to let his surrounding compatriots know that Skinner’s shooting rating has been updated because of his hot start. Good to know, Chel kid.

Chel Kid was overjoyed when 1:39 into the second period Jeff Skinner came in on the right circle and sliced one home over Keith Kincaid’s far shoulder to draw the Sabres even. Tage Thompson, banging on the door all night got the only assist on that play.  I get an added kick out of Skinner’s 29th goal this season out of the hope that he’s warming up for Friday night’s trip to his old stomping ground in Carolina. I have that kind of midrange buzzing hatred for the Canes and I hope Skinner does pirouette goals around them. I had hardly stopped freaking out about Skinner potentially getting his 30th goal while I was there when C.J. Smith collects an arching pass from Johan Larsson in the offensive zone all by his Sabre lonesome. He proceeded to lean around the Devils defenseman and get his shot off from the low circle. The puck lands behind Kincaid and trickles in. It hardly looked like a goal. Smith cellyed on his own while it was deliberated. The refs reviewed it and the arena buzzed with cheer as the replays played on the video board. It was made official: C.J. Smith’s first NHL goal and one that feels like the start of something great considering his last 16 months with Rochester: glorious! What comes next over the six to ten minutes to follow is a moderate counterattack by the Devils who were actually 3-2 in their last 5 games coming into this one. Hutton stoned them on the few shots they got. Loudmouth actually started getting into the product on the ice at this point; it may be in part because Chel Kid had a lot to say about the Rochester Americans following Smith’s goal. My word, if NHL 19 is an adequate teacher of Hockey then this kid is probably smarter about Hockey then me, not that I’m any genius.

Casey Mittelstadt has been rough lately. He’s almost a guaranteed commodity. In time he will be a bankable second line center. Unfortunately he’s so not that right now that talk of trading for a 2C to fill that role for a time is afoot. Mittelstadt got the puck at the blue line and went along the left boards before cutting in and shooting the puck right on Kincaid. He then collects his own rebound and puts it around him on the second attempt at 10:42 of the second. That’s a nice little weight off his shoulders and his first goal in ten games. The Devils got twice as many powerplay opportunities as the Sabres in this game but the Buffalo PK was hot and the Devils just weren’t on their PPs. The Devils were on the powerplay with Buffalo up 3-1 when Vladimir Sabotka got the puck to Evan Rodrigues who broke out of the D-Zone with Jake McCabe. The two went in two-on-one against Will Butcher and did the old last second pass and McCabe got the puck past Kincaid who was still looking at E-Rod: shorthanded goal and 4-1 Sabres! This second period had everything from tape-to-tape passes to good zone entries on the Sabres part. It was maybe the most complete period they’ve played since November. But it wasn’t done yet! They were set up in the O-Zone when Conor Sheary got the puck back to our young Lawrence Pilut at the blue line. Pilut just rips that one at a foot per second and the puck goes in a straight line past his own guys, a couple Devils defenders and Keith Kincaid: 5-1 Sabres. Loudmouth must have seen this play from the start because he immediately lost his mind. Chel kid gave me a good laugh when he yelled: How many goals will they score!?

They would score no more and neither would the Devils. The visitors would shoot as many shots as the Sabres in the third period and even get a couple scraps going. None would pass and this game ended 5-1 and hit me like a cool, spring breeze. Buffalo needed this and as Loudmouth said: I’ve never seen a Sabres game with this many goals! Not only that Loudmouth but if you count assists 14 different Sabres got points in this game and all but one from Skinner came from non-top line guys. That by itself is worth celebrating. I don’t just joke about exorcism because it’s the Devils: that lack of secondary scoring has been a real blight for this team. Moreover, the Devils are an Eastern Conference team which means in the second half of this season they get Playoff Trash talk with New Look Sabres: New Jersey, if you make the playoffs at this point it will be something of a miracle. Your mix of young guns and geriatric players makes you and enigma to figure out but goaltending is not stable in Newark and the Sabres would make quick work outscoring a Devils team that in spite of its talent has no true firepower. Taylor Hall went from a five alarm fire in Edmonton to an already burnt down sporting goods store in New Jersey and isn’t saving this team in a seven-game series: not last season, not this season. Beating the Devils in the first round would be our punishment to them for making the 2010s a nightmare at home. Sabres win in 5.

Speaking of the Playoffs: the only good news on that front last night was that the Islanders lost and are now two points back of Buffalo in the first spot out. Montreal, Boston and even Carolina won so all the other spots remain the same although Buffalo moves up to the first wildcard spot. They have to beat Carolina on Friday because every team around them in the standings plays one or two games between now and then. Their buffer is gone but yes, there is much hockey to be played. Like, comment and share this blog. I look forward to a day both Loudmouth and Chel Kid read New Look Sabres although I’m not helping myself with a younger demographic making a friggin Tae-Bo reference. Do also note however that I didn’t call this game just exorcism; yes they played the right way in this game but I am not convinced yet that they’re exorcising some of those consistent mistakes. See you Friday in what will surely be a feelsy game. Keep pace, Sabres!

Thanks for reading.

P.S. Scott Wilson getting waived right now may seem stranger than how precise Jack Eichel’s game day regimen is but the 411 on that is that when he clears he’s going down to Rochester for a reclamation stint if you will having been out since Training Camp.

[ethanalter]

The heartbreaking true story behind 'ALF's Special Christmas'

GIF: Alien Productions

The ’80s were a heyday for “Very Special Episodes,” those odd installments of a family sitcom and/or kids’ show where things unexpectedly got serious. Whether it was Alex P. Keaton spending an entire episode in therapy or Arnold Jackson having a harrowing encounter with a child molester, these half-hours admirably, if often awkwardly, tried to address complex subjects in ways that young viewers could process. At that time and still today, there’s never been a “Very Special Episode” quite like “ALF’s Special Christmas.” Premiering precisely 30 years ago on Dec. 14, 1987, ALF‘s hourlong Christmas tale separated the titular intergalactic immigrant from his adopted human family so that he could bring good tidings and joy to a dying young girl named Tiffany as she prepares to celebrate her very last holiday. Oh yeah, and he also prevents the hospital’s resident Santa, Mr. Foley — who is a grieving widower when not in costume — from taking a leap off of a snowy bridge.

It’s safe to say that dying children and suicidal Santas aren’t conventional ways of spreading Christmas cheer. And in the years since “ALF’s Special Christmas” premiered, the episode has frequently been written about in disbelieving tones by writers who are flummoxed by how it ever aired in the first place. Now the story can be told: Yes, Virginia there really was a Tiffany. Yahoo Entertainment learned this bombshell bit of news when we spoke with Paul Fusco, who created and voiced ALF, and writer Steve Hollander, who penned “Alf’s Special Christmas.” “The episode came out of a true story,” Fusco reveals. “I used to do a lot of Make-A-Wish things, because kids would write to ALF, and I would get calls from doctors. It’s heartbreaking when you think about it.”

Cleavon Little as Mr. Foley and Keri Houlihan as Tiffany in “Alf’s Special Christmas.” (Photo: Alien Productions)

One of the letters he received was from a girl named Tiffany Leigh Smith, whom the character in “ALF’s Special Christmas” is based on. “I don’t remember all the details, but I saved her letters and have them on file,” Fusco says. As Hollander recalls, the real Tiffany was a 9-year-old from the Midwest suffering from leukemia and eager to have a face-to-face conversation with her favorite Melmac citizen. “Someone at the local NBC station arranged a kind of video conference setup between her in her hospital bed and ALF,” he says. “He also had the presence of mind to turn on the tape and record it! [Former NBC president] Brandon Tartikoff saw it and thought, ‘We should make a Christmas special around this story.'”

While he can’t recall the specifics of his conversation with Tiffany, Fusco says that his general approach to those kinds of private appearances would be to keep the mood light and playful. “I would make jokes and small talk. I would try not to talk about their situation, which they didn’t want to talk about anyway. I would sometimes get a fact sheet about what they liked or didn’t like. And then I’d throw it to them, and ask, ‘Do you have any questions you want to ask me?’ I tried to make them laugh as much as I could and then say, ‘Hang in there, you be good — I hope to see you again.’ You leave them on a positive note; it’s about all you can do.” One rule he absolutely had was to never break character in front of the children. “These kids wanted to believe — it was magic to them. I was a magician early on in my career, and you never want to see what’s behind the curtain. You want to keep it real.”

That’s the same way that Hollander and Fusco both approached the task of turning Tiffany’s real-life story into the basis for “ALF’s Special Christmas.” Watching the episode, it’s striking how different it looks from a typical episode of ALF or, for that matter, a typical episode of any ’80s sitcom. Gone is the laugh track, the usual set, and the three-camera setup, replaced by a single camera (the episode was shot on film, rather than video), real locations — including a former hospital rented out by film and television productions — and the usual rhythm of setup and punchline. The dramatic shift is evident from the earliest scenes, when ALF’s misunderstandings of Christmas conventions lead him to exile himself from the Tanner clan, climbing into Mr. Foley’s van and ending up in the pile of presents he hands out to sick kids at the hospital. “I was unsure of how it would come off,” Fusco admits now of the special’s more serious tone. “I didn’t want it to look hokey or saccharine in any way. I was also worried how I would react in those scenes, but it was really one of the first dramatic roles that ALF had to play in the show.”

GIF: Alien Productions

In contrast, Hollander says that once he viewed the tape of ALF’s bedside chat with Tiffany and talked at length with the show’s co-creator, Tom Patchett, the story flowed easily. “In Tom’s mind, the central question for ALF was: What do you say to a little girl who is not going to see another Christmas?” Perhaps recognizing the unique tonal and narrative challenges presented by that question, Patchett allowed Hollander to pen his script outside of the writers’ room, where episodes were written and rewritten by the entire staff. “The staff was not involved in outlining the story or rewriting it. The person who could change anything was Tom.” And Hollander remembers that Patchett didn’t want to change very much about the script that he turned in. “Maybe 10-15 percent was cut out just for time. There was one scene in the beginning where the Tanners are driving to their family cabin, and ALF is in the backseat in a child’s seat with a little steering wheel. And every two seconds, he’s going, “Are we there yet? Are we there yet?’ That didn’t get filmed because of production scheduling. But other than that, nothing major was taken out or added.”

One scene that was always in the script, much to Fusco’s concern, was a sequence where ALF would play doctor to a pregnant woman, helping deliver her baby while they were both stranded in an elevator. Hollander wrote that encounter into the script as a way to generate some laughs in an otherwise serious episode. “I was kind of on edge about that scene,” Fusco confesses now. “Any time they could put ALF in a doctor’s suit or something stupid like that, I was always like, ‘No, no, no, no!’ But they said, ‘You need to balance the jokes off with the dying child.’ It’s probably the silliest moment in the episode, but I think the audience forgave us.”

GIF: Alien Productions

As per “Very Special Episode” tradition, “ALF’s Special Christmas” features a pair of very special guest stars. Blazing Saddles leading man Cleavon Little personally sought out the role of Mr. Foley, a character Fusco says he hoped veteran character actor Barnard Hughes might play. “Our casting person said that Cleavon was either a fan of the show or made some overture that he was interested in the part. I thought, ‘Wow, that’s a total 180 from where I was going with it!’ I don’t think he started out as a comedic actor and, because of Blazing Saddles, he probably wanted a dramatic role again. He was a fun guy to work with.”

And Fusco couldn’t resist injecting a little Blazing Saddles-style humor into his relatively few scenes with Little. While shooting the bridge sequence, where ALF talks Mr. Foley back from the literal ledge, the actor went off-script for the first take. “I yelled ‘Jump,’ and then said, ‘You’ve got nothing left; you might as well do it — it’s the right choice.’ The crew went crazy! I think that broke the ice with Cleavon.” (It’s worth noting that Little also shares scenes with another future star, Carl Franklin, who plays Tiffany’s doctor. Franklin has since become a respected director, alternating features like Devil in a Blue Dress with episodic work on shows like House of Cards and The Leftovers.)

GIF: Alien Productions

For the role of Tiffany, meanwhile, NBC indulged in a little cross-promotion by suggesting that the producers cast child actress Keri Houlihan, one of the stars of the Wilford Brimley drama Our House. Fusco says he’s uncertain whether Houlihan — who left acting after Our House ended in 1988 — was aware that she was playing a real person. But neither she nor NBC insisted on providing the fictional Tiffany with a last-minute reprieve via, say, a Melmacian serum or a Christmas miracle. The last time we see her, she’s sadly waving goodbye to ALF from the window of her hospital room, a clear signal that she won’t be going home. (A closing title card pays tribute to the real Tiffany.) “That never came up — maybe because there was a real story there,” Hollander says when asked whether the network wanted a happier ending. “Nobody thought, ‘We’ve got to make a cheerful Christmas story. It was a true situation; we weren’t trying to invent a story.” In fact, Fusco remembers receiving letters from Tiffany’s mother and doctor after the girl’s death. “They said that by just allowing her to talk to ALF, it prolonged her life by maybe a month. It gave her hope to hold on to.”

While “ALF’s Special Christmas” is often met with baffled reactions today, 30 years ago it helped the sitcom attain its perch among 1987’s most highly rated shows. And rather than be upset by it, young viewers seemed to take its serious storyline in stride. “The phone was ringing off the hook for sponsors as soon as that episode aired,” remembers Hollander, who went on to work as a co-producer during the show’s third season and also wrote a two-part Thanksgiving special where ALF aids a homeless man in the Tanners’ neighborhood. “My mother watched the show with some young kids from the neighborhood and said, ‘They didn’t laugh once!’ And I said, ‘That’s great, Mom. That’s just what I wanted.’ It was a true situation and we had this character that kids didn’t know was just a puppet. ALF had meaning to a lot of children.”

Photo: Alien Productions

Fusco expresses similar sentiments about kids’ affection for his alien alter ego blunting any emotional trauma from Tiffany’s story. “They believed enough in the character that we were able to pull it off and keep it real. They saw the emotion and felt that ALF had more range than just being a one-line jokester.” At the same time, he’s aware that “ALF’s Special Christmas” is more of a time capsule for a vanished era of TV as opposed to a source of inspiration for contemporary sitcoms. “What shows are doing that kind of thing today? The Big Bang Theory wouldn’t do something like that. Did we overdo it back then? Or is it because there’s so much horror in the world right now, we want to give audiences pure escapism? Buying into the character was the important part, and it apparently worked because people are moved by it.”

ALF is available to rent or purchase on Amazon, or stream for free on Amazon Prime with a Starz subscription.

Read more from Yahoo Entertainment: The 30 best TV moments of 2017  Celebrities who lit up 2017 All of ‘The Office’ Christmas episodes, ranked

[popcorn-for-dinner]

The 2017 Binges you absolutely have to do before 2018

"The Golden Age of Television". That's a saying you've most likely heard as a description of the current state of TV. It has been used from everyone from TV and Studio executives to that your one friend who won't shut up about how great Master of None is. Whatever your feelings about the term, one thing is for certain, there are more quality shows being produced at an almost daily basis than ever before. So many that it seems impossible to follow the TV landscape while, you know, having a life.

That's why I'm here. I've given up my real life so that you can have one and still watch the best TV. You're welcome. Whether it's your FOMO on all the great TV topics or you're just looking for an easy binge for the Christmas break, I’m going to try and provide adequate suggestions to satiate everyone.

The Weekend binges 

Mindhunter (Netflix)

David Fincher's return to Netflix! This show is based on a book by John E. Douglas, a former FBI special agent and a pioneer in criminal profiling in the FBI’s Behavioural Science Unit.

While the protagonists are fictionalised versions of the actual people, the real attraction of the series lies with serial killers and their interviews with the FBI. The criminals do maintain their real names and are depicted to a chillingly high degree of accuracy, in some cases even lifting actual dialogue from the real life interviews.

A terrific examination of the criminal psyche (a feat David Fincher has shown to be a master at), Mindhunter will have you hooked from the first episode.

You’ll like this if you liked: Zodiac (2007 film), Hannibal, Dexter (probably).

Ozark (Netflix)

Although dealing with a fairly well trodden premise, Ozark manages to elevate itself from the constraints of its premise and deliver an entertaining, gripping season.

There is no mistake though, this is Jason Bateman’s show to shine and shine he does. Wearing multiple hats as star, producer and director of 4 episodes (probably the show’s best episodes), Jason Bateman delivers a complex and entertaining performance as Marty Byrde, a money launderer for a crime syndicate who is forced to uproot his family and move to the Ozarks in order to pay back a debt to the syndicate.

You might believe you know all the tropes of this sub-genre but Ozark has a few surprises waiting for you.

You'll like this if you liked: Bloodline, Breaking Bad.

The Niche binges

I believe everyone should love a great dick joke. A perfectly crafted and executed dick joke can be side splittingly funny as is evidenced by the fact that Silicon Valley’s season one's “optimal tip to tip efficiency" joke  has seemed to take on a life of its own even spawning research papers with actual Stanford approved maths. I however concede that not everyone is as sophisticated as me, which is why I have put these 2 shows in the “niche” category.

American Vandal (Netflix)

American Vandal is really just an almost 5 hour dick joke at its core. It takes a simple, quite ridiculous, premise- someone spray paints 27 dicks on teachers’ cars in the school parking lot and the accused student is expelled. It is a true crime mockumentary but it doesn’t seek to discredit the genre but rather as all great satire does, it pays it homage.

The characters and the show approach this premise with such straight faced seriousness and investigative attitude that it makes the jokes that much more hilarious. Special mention should be given to Jimmy Tatro whose performance drives the show and who turns the “YouTube douche” personality into an art form.

I did find that, beneath all the dick references, well over 1,000 (both visual and verbal), American Vandal tries to say something and if you pause long enough from laughing and figuring out “Who drew the dicks?” you might just hear it.

You'll like this if you liked: 7 Days in Hell, Documentary Now!, Making a Murderer (but yearned for something less deep).

Big Mouth (Netflix)

Following the success of the Simpsons, animation quickly became the go to medium for telling deeply perverse and hilarious stories that could never be written for and performed by real people. But the real successes came in the episodes of Simpsons, South Park, Family Guy etc that transcended their "cartoons tell dirty jokes" gimmick and showed some heart and deft in their storytelling. Big Mouth has lots of heart.

With a stellar voice cast which includes co-creator Nick Kroll. John Mulaney, Jordan Peele, Maya Rudolph and Jason Mantzoukas, Big Mouth manages to tell an insightful, universal coming of age, puberty story while also juggling the fact that two of its main cast are "Hormone Monsters" and it has the ghost of Duke Ellington living in a character's attic. (The show is weird, guys)

You'll like this if you liked: Family Guy (the earlier years) and basically any other R-Rated animated comedy.

Trailer

The Snowed-in and cuddle binges

Dear White People (Netflix)

I am a sucker for a good story by and about black people. If such a show manages to deftly attack systemic racism then I'm fully sold. Dear White People however, is more than a guns-blazing attack on racial injustice. Sure, that's the premise by which it starts but as it evolves it begins to say something more on identity, especially Black Identity and all that term entails.

Based on his critically acclaimed film of the same name, Justin Simien manages to improve on his original work in possible every imaginable way. It follows a group of black students at a predominantly white University, as they attempt to negotiate the racial politics and come to terms with their own identities.

You'll like this if you liked: Black-ish and Dear White People (2014 film).

Trailer

The Bold Type (Freeform)

It is no secret that there is a paucity of stories about and driven by female characters and what is even rarer are stories that explore female relationships, especially friendships amongst the younger demographic.  Insecure and Jane the Virgin have told some of these stories during their runs and The Bold Type did it incredibly well, under the radar, in 2017.

Through Scarlet, the Teen-vogue like magazine where the protagonists work, The Bold Type manages to address relevant societal issues such as politics, rape, religion and professional ambition while maintaining a "summer-y binge feel to it".    

You'll like this if you liked: Ugly Betty, The Devil Wears Prada (2006 film).

Trailer

The Good Fight (CBS All Access)

First of all, for any The Good Wife fan who hasn't seen this already, shame on you. For any non-Good Wife fans though, do not be deterred by the Good Wife link because this show more than ably stands on its own.

Set a year after the finale of TGW, The Good Fight follows the great Diane Lockhart after a financial scam causes her to lose all her savings and she is forced out of her firm. She then joins an all-black law firm that already includes The Good Wife fan favourite Luca Quinn. Rounding off the cast are Sarah Stele (returning as another fan-favourite Marissa Gold), Delroy Lindo, Justin Bartha and Game of Thrones' Rose Leslie.

For Good Wife fans, you don't know how satisfying it is to hear Diane yell "Fuck" until you actually do.

You'll like this if you liked: The Good Wife or any other great legal drama.

Trailer

Obligatory Superhero binge

Legion (FX)

In a year where Superhero TV was littered with messy newcomers such as Iron Fist and Inhumans, Legion was such a breath of fresh air. Rising above the genre of "Superhero TV", it was in my opinion, one of the best new shows of the year.

Noah Hawley (creator of Fargo) examines what would happen if instead of being enlightened as to his mutant powers, a very powerful mutant was diagnosed as having schizophrenia. Legion is the son of Professor Xavier in the comics and excluding a few easter eggs and nods, that is where this show's link to the wider X-men universe ends. It is a show that stands on its own and does not require knowledge of the wider X-men mythology to be enjoyed.

Legion and Noah Hawley are much more interested in diving into an examination of mental illness and the various stereotypes surrounding it than they are in fighting a "big bad". It is a very trippy, colourful and awe-inspiring piece of television that is evident right from its excellent pilot. The performances of Aubrey Plaza and Dan Stevens manage to shine through from a group of wonderful performances.

Top Picks

There are few things more satisfying to me than a perfectly told, timely story of import. Unfortunately, in the mad dash to tell an "important" story, especially on cable television, good storytelling has often been pushed aside for either pretension or just sloppy work. Their ability to buck this trend was one of the many refreshing things about Big Little Lies and The Handmaid's Tale.

Big Little Lies (HBO)

The immediate draw to this series (for the non-book readers) is undoubtedly the cast. This highly stacked cast includes the likes of Nicole Kidman, Reese Witherspoon, Shailene Woodley, Laura Dern, Zoë Kravitz, Alexander Skarsgård and Adam Scott, but once the novelty of the cast wears off, the strength of the story will keep you hooked.

Big Little Lies is a wonderfully well written, directed and acted piece of television that approaches some very heavy and important topics with a delightfully nuanced touch. It says a lot to the strength of the several stories told that the murder mystery at the center of the show, while intriguing in its own right, quickly fades into the background. To give any more details would be to spoil what is a very well done show.

Trailer

The Handmaid's Tale (Hulu)

In The Handmaid's Tale's world, fertility rates have plummeted to almost non-existent numbers. This has resulted in the fertile women being kept as personal breeding grounds for the more affluent member of the cult-like organisation that has taken over society.

The Handmaid's Tale holds many mirrors to our current society but perhaps none is more chilling than the straight path that can be drawn from 45's current America to the "dystopian" society predicted in this 1985(!) novel.

The Handmaid's Tale is built on the Emmy-winning performance of Elisabeth Moss and firmly stands as my best show of 2017 and a definite must watch.

Bankole Imoukhuede

@banky_I

[all-sortsa-stuff]

A new start, part 12

Pairing:  Chris Evans x Reader

Word count: 2677

Warning: Language, Angst

 Part 11

 Chris frowned as you tossed the phone onto the bed.  Wrapping the towel back around his waist he moved close placing a warm hand on your shoulder.

“Baby, what’s the matter?” You knew he was just going to love this.  

“Umm, so I guess one of the leading stars had to be replaced at the last minute.  I don’t know the details of why and honestly I don’t care. But it seems to be I am going to be working with David.”  The mention of that name had Chris clenching his free hand at his side.  

“They are just telling you now?  You leave for Mexico in a week.”  With a sigh, you turned to flop down on the bed.

“Oh, I know.  I am not happy about this at all.  There is nothing I can do now, though.  I can’t break my contract.  At least it’s only for a month.  I am not one of the lead characters so I hopefully won’t have to deal with him as often.”  Chris came to sit next to you on the bed rubbing your back.

“Are you two supposed to be love interests?”

“Oh God no.  We are playing relatives actually; my character ends up with the person his character is battling against.  So there is that.”  Both of you finished dressing as the mood had been officially ruined.  Before long lunch was finished and you were back on set, filming for the afternoon.  That night you tried to make the best of what was going to be the last night together before separating again.  Dinner was takeout sushi that you were eating while sitting on the floor of the small apartment.  Chris told you how he was going to London for a few days for a comic convention after filming finished in two weeks.  There were panels he and some of the other Marvel actors were going to be part of.

Once you were done in Mexico you had another month off before starting the press tour for one of your films.  Chris would be finished with Captain America and you planned for more time alone together. “We should seriously take a vacation somewhere.  No phones or people following us.  A beach or cabin or something.”

“A beach?  Hmm maybe.  Though it is getting closer towards fall.  The holidays will be here before we know it.”  Popping one of the rolls in your mouth, you grinned.

“Wow yeah the holidays, that’s kind of crazy.  Though it will be our first holidays together.  I am looking forward to that.  We should probably figure out where we are going to be for everything.” It was the first time you had thought about that.  Would Chris survive a holiday with your family?  It could get a little crazy and country with them down in Tennessee.  

“Do you have a preference on where you want to be for what holiday?”  He sat back to think about it a moment.

“Well I would like to be in Boston for Christmas.  It’s a big deal for my family.”  You shrugged as you sipped on your wine.

“I’m good with that. My mom makes a huge Thanksgiving meal for my entire family which is a lot.  We can switch next year.”  Leaning over close he kissed you.

“I think the idea that you are planning for the holidays next year too.”

“Well why not?  I mean, you are stuck with me.”  Both of you laughed as you kissed again.  Dinner was soon forgotten.

 Chris went back to Ohio promising to work on calling and texting more.  He only had the short time left of filming so it should be better.  The last day on set of Supernatural had been fun with Jared pranking you several times. With that you felt like one of the family.  It was wonderful.  Your character was alive for the end of the season and there had been talks of maybe in the future bringing her back for another episode or two as they had with previous characters.  That was something that you hoped for.

The two days between projects was nonexistent.  There had been issues with your plane tickets and getting your belongings to Mexico on time. The way it all ended up was that you arrived at 7pm on the night before you were supposed to start.  There were no big introductions with the rest of the crew.   6 am on that morning you arrived to the set out in the desert and brought in one of the many tents for makeup and wardrobe.  Your scenes were to begin once your costume and hair were complete.  The tent was busy as many of the cast was busy readying for one of the large scale shots.  

David of course was seated at one of the larger makeup stations as he was being covered with dirt for the scene.  Wanting to avoid contact with him, you found one of the side stations so they could start clipping the hair pieces into your hair.  The cellular reception was awful where you were so it was a pain trying to find something to distract yourself while they worked with you.  “[Y/N]?”

Your shoulders tensed at the sound of his voice.  Looking up, you could see David standing behind you through the reflection in the mirror.  “Hello, David.”

A cautious smile appeared on his face.  “It’s good to see you.  I’m glad we will get to work together again.”  Someone called his name from outside the test.  “Umm, I will see you in a little while I guess.”

“Yes, see you in a little bit.”  He walked off, leaving you to sigh loudly.  It was only your luck that you would have to deal with him first thing. You swore to yourself you would keep it as professional as possible.  There was no desire to have your face splashed across more magazines for acting like a fool.

With your hair done, makeup ready and costume on you stepped out into the desert sun.  Thankfully your costume was an ancient Grecian robe that was light.  The heat would have killed you if it had been anything heavier.  Your opening scene brought you face to face with all of the lead actors of the project.  It had been sometime since your character had been home and you were to reunite with your family.  The scene had to be shot from several different angles due to lighting.  This forced you to have to hug David and the actor playing his brother five times each.  It was getting old after a while but you did as you were told.

The rest of the day went all right but you were ready to be out of the sun and off set.  Most of the cast and crew were staying in small villas that were close to the beach about three miles from the set.  It took close to thirty minutes for you to scrub away the sand and sunscreen that was layered on your skin.  The only thing you wanted now was a glass of wine and to talk to Chris. It was a few hours ahead in Ohio but you tried calling anyway.  You wanted to hear his voice before you had to go to bed.

The phone rang a couple times before someone picked up.  It sounded like someone was fumbling to find it before you could hear Chris’s voice. “Give me the phone, damn it!  No Seb!  Come one man.”  There was laughing and more commotion until you heard a voice finally talk to you.

“You have reached Chris’s phone; he is busy being a pain in the ass.  This is Sebastian, how can I help you today?”  You needed the laugh for the evening so it was good to hear.

“Hi Sebastian, this is [Y/N].  I was calling to check on my boyfriend.”  

“Oh hi [Y/N]!  It’s so good to finally talk to you.”  At hearing your name Chris started yelling from the background.”

“[Y/N] the ass stole my phone!  Don’t listen to anything he says.”  You laughed quietly settling down onto the bed.

“So [Y/N] we have all heard SO much about you.  Our little Christopher is quite taken with you.”  There was a thud and a scream of pain.  “Oh fuck, I am going to kick your ass.”

You laughed harder as Chris had finally gotten his phone.  “One second babe, let me get away from him before he does it again.”  There was a closing of a door and an echoing in the background.  “That’s better.  I am hiding in the bathroom before he finds me.”

“Sounds like you are having a good time.  I wish I was there with you.”

“Mexico not going like you hoped?”

Downing half the glass of wine before you answered with a sigh.  “No.  I had scenes out in the sun all day and with him on top of that.  Just over and over with the same scene, it was a bit much for the first day.  But I will survive it all.  What are you guys up to?”

“Not a lot.  A couple of us are just hanging out having a few beers and bullshitting.  It was a physically exhausting day so we just wanted to wind down before going back tomorrow. Obviously Seb really needs to wind down more than anyone else.”  His quiet laugh made you warm all over.  

“Don’t stay up too late you don’t want the director reaming you out in the morning.  That shit sucks with a hangover.”  

“I won’t.  Get some sleep baby, you sound tired.  I will text you tomorrow.  I love you beautiful.”

“I’m going to try.  I love you too, Chris.  Talk to you tomorrow.”  That phone call made the rest of your night.  You did not care anymore about the previous portion of the day; you were able to talk to Chris.  That made up for it all.

The following two weeks went much quicker than you believed they would.  Chris finished filming and said he was going to London soon.  Though there was a day in between that he had not called at all.  He had sent a few random texts that seemed off.  This was very strange for him but there was little time to ask him why.

After the second week of your project the primary cast had been invited out by the director to dinner at one of the places on the beach.  It was about forty-five minutes from the villas so several black SUV’s were contracted to drive everyone there.  There were paparazzi waiting at the entrance to the restaurant when everyone arrived. You were glad that you had worn a long maxi dress so that you did not have to worry about flashing anyone.

Dinner went well and everyone gathered had a great time.  The food was delicious and the drinks were wonderful.  Hours later everyone piled back into the vehicles, ready to get some rest.  The paparazzi were still there with their cameras trying to get whatever shots they could.  David climbed into the front of one of the SUV’s as you climbed in the back moving all the way over, to give room for some of the others.  It had been a fun drama free night.  Something you needed very much.

Reception was still spotty when you got back to set the next day.  No calls or texts were able to come in or out.  That lasted three more days after that.  Not having access to let Chris know what was going on drove you crazy but there was nothing at this point that you could do.  After a particularly long day of filming that went till 3 o’clock in the morning on the third day you dragged yourself to bed for the day. Sometime in the afternoon you heard your phone going crazy with incoming messages that you must have missed.  Finally reception was restored.  As you picked up the phone it started ringing with Chris’s ringtone.

Answering with a sleepy “Hello?”

“I was starting to think you were ignoring me.”  Chris sounded flat and there was a lot of noise in the background making it difficult to hear him.

“I would never ignore you. There hasn’t been any reception for anyone.”  He was silent on the other end as the chaos went on around him.

“You were sleeping?” There was something very wrong. He did not sound like himself. “It’s it like 3 in the afternoon.”

“Well yeah it is.  I was filming till really late this morning. So I have been sleeping today.  I have to go back again later tonight. Chris what’s the matter?”  There may have been a grunt but it was difficult to tell.

“Nothing… So you haven’t been ignoring me?  No way to get any texts or calls out?”  The ending to the question was slurred.  

“Chris are you drunk?” He laughed but it was cold, completely unlike him.

“I’ve had a couple beers but I’m not drunk.  Had to do something while you were out living it up in Mexico with your ex.”  Now you were completely awake, as you sat up in bed.

“What the fuck are you talking about?  Living it up? I am filming and I go to sleep.  I haven’t had time to even go to the damn beach.” There was that cold laugh again.

“That’s not what the pictures, the entire world is looking at, say.”

“What pictures?  I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“Oh really?  So you completely forgot getting into a car alone with your ex.  You had that green dress on.”  Rolling your eyes, you were really tempted to throw the damn phone across the room.

“I was not in a car alone with him at any time.  He sat in the front seat and I sat in the back with two other people.  We have barely spoken to each other outside of scenes. Why are you acting like this Chris? I would never do anything behind your back.  I love you.”

“Considering I couldn’t get a hold of you for days after those pictures came out I figured you weren’t above doing that.  Did all those feelings come rushing back when you say him again?”  You felt like he had slapped you across the face.  The sting hurting deep within your heart.

“You don’t trust me…  I could never…  I can’t do this if you don’t trust me.”    Your voice caught as you tried to keep from crying until you hung up.  Then you turned the phone off completely sending it somewhere off the side of the bed. Ugly sobs followed for hours.  The girls in makeup later on had a time trying to cover your swollen red eyes.  Somehow you were able to get through the scenes that night though everyone could tell something was wrong.  

The next morning you passed out cold wanting to shut everything else for a little while.  By the time you woke in the afternoon and found your phone turning it back on there were many more texts and missed calls. Most of them from Chris.  There was no desire to even look at the texts or listen to the messages.  Your heart was hurting too bad.

 In London that morning:

Chris woke up lying face down on the stiff hotel bed still fully clothed.  His head was pounding as someone knocked on the door of his room. “Chris get up man, we have to be at the first panel soon.”  

He could hear one of the producers calling from behind the door.  “I’m up.  Give me a few I need to get cleaned up.”  He had had so much to drink the night before, it was fuzzy how he got back to the room. Standing from the bed he walked towards the bathroom door when his phone rang.  Hearing the ringtone brought all the memories from the previous night back.

“Oh fuck… [Y/N].  Oh shit. I’m a fucking idiot.”

 Part 13

tags:  @feelmyroarrrr  @bolontiku  @aquabrie   @malindacath  @almondbuttercup  @thegirlwithnodragontattoo @magellan-88  @jensenxnina @thedoctorsnerdgirl  @waywardswain @tacohead13  @beckyboo1188@pegasusdragontiger   @our-chaoticwhispers @castallandiangelo @smoothdogsgirl  @kitty11223   @sf0206 @debzybrazy @theresnotenoughwords @smurfielovesyouu @adeptkillsyasse   @xxxeatyourh3artoutxxx @white-chocolate-mocha-fan  @supernaturallymarvellous

[lovemesomesurveys]

Have you ever read the Hunger Games series? Yep and saw the movies. When was the last time you ran into something? I’m constantly banging my elbow or hand on something. Do you enjoy dressing up? I used to. I just don’t have the energy nowadays. I used to actually put some effort into my appearance. Do you live in the city or a rural area? I live in a city. Would you say you have a sense of style? My style is very casual.

What’s your biggest fear? Losing my loved ones. Have you ever been bitten by a wild animal? No. Are you close to any of your cousins? I used to be close to 3 of them, but that has since dwindled... mostly by my own doing. I’ve been very distant and withdrawn from everyone. Have you ever been lost in the woods? No, and I can’t imagine ever being in that situation. I hope to never be. Where did you last travel? A nearby touristy city. Do you enjoy driving? I don’t drive. What song did you last listen to? I don’t remember at the moment. If you have a job, how often do you work? No job. What time do you normally go to sleep at night? I start to fall asleep around 3, but usually not for good until about 5. :/ Do you watch a lot of movies? Not really. Do you like Tom Petty? RIP Tom Petty. I like a couple songs. Would you rather have snow or rain? I love the rain. I think I’d love the snow, too, if it snowed here. Do you own a lot of sweaters? Yeah. Have you ever tried rock-climbing? Not sure how that would work as a paraplegic. Ever ridden in a police car? No. Favorite decade of music? Probably 90s and 2000s. Have any of your best friends been your best friend longer than a year? Yes. Ever witnessed a murder? No. Do you care what people think of you? I do and I don’t if that makes sense. Like... I feel self-conscious about my appearance and what people think of me, and yet I don’t put much effort into my appearance and don’t take care of myself like I should. I do things that don’t help the situation because part of me stopped caring. Does your room have a ceiling fan? Yes. Would you consider yourself poised? No. Have you ever tried blogging? This is it. Before Tumblr; though, I had Xanga. Favorite television channel? E! and MTV. Have you ever lied under oath? I’ve never been under oath. What are your religious views? I’m a Christian. Are you a romantic person? I haven’t really been able to given my lack of experience in the relationship department. Would you consider yourself a flirt? No. At what age do you plan to be married? I don’t think I’ll ever be married. Do you eat a lot of junk food? Yes. When did you last go on vacation? May. Are you resilient? I used to be when I was younger, but not anymore. Have you ever failed a subject before? No. If so, what was the class? Do you wear more bright or dull colors? Dull. Do you know anyone who has attempted suicide? Yes. What’s your favorite quote? I don’t know. Ha, that’s probably my favorite since I say it all the time. Would you consider yourself mature? Yeah, I mean for the most part. How many clocks are in your house? Several. Do you play any sports? Nope. What is your biggest life regret? I have too many. Have you ever been injured in a car accident? No. If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be? Somewhere cozy where it snows. Have you ever had highlights in your hair? Yeah, I did that for years. Favorite fast food restaurant? Chick-Fil-A. In what country were you born? USA. Are your eyes more than one color? Nope. Have you ever caught something on fire? The tip of my hair.... What would you consider your biggest flaw? I’m too sensitive. What do you think your best quality is? I don’t feel I have one. Do you enjoy listening to others’ problems? I used to be a great listener and was the one my friends came to, but I haven’t been that person in a long time because I’ve been too wrapped up in my own problems. Do you keep any plants in your house? No. What is your mother’s occupation? She’s a manager at Walgreens. Do any of your friends like your musical style? Yeah. What are you most looking forward to? Christmas. What was your favorite television show as a child? I was obsessed with Barney when I was little. Are you afraid of insects? Terrified. Are you cold-natured? No. How old were you when you got your first pet? Five. Did you/do you enjoy high school? Some parts of it. What would you say was your favorite age? My childhood. What annoys you most about social networking? Oh where to begin. Are you the center of attention most of the time? Noooo. I wouldn’t want to be. What are you currently reading? Troubled Waters (The Lake Series, Book 2) by Annalisa Grant. When did you last go to the library? I went to the school library at the college I attended sometimes while I was in school. Are you ill at the moment? I’m always feelings unwell in some way or another. Do people tease you about anything? Jokingly, but yeah. How late did you stay up last night and why? Until about 5 because that’s just how it goes.

Have you ever written poetry? Yeah. Well, tried to anyway. Curtains or shades? Curtains. How many people have you spoken to in the last hour? One. Do you tend to text a lot? Nope. Ever lost a great best friend? Yes. What is your favorite kind of flower? Roses. How tall are you? i would have been about 5′7. Do you own any guns? No. What would you say is your favorite book of all-time? I couldn’t choose. Do you think you’re living a good life? No. What’s your least favorite part of the day? Meh. Are you an over-achiever? Ha, no. Have you ever won an award for a speech? No. Do you tend to curse a lot? No. Have you ever played on the Ouija board? No and I never would. Do you sleepwalk? I don’t. Have you ever slept on the floor before? Yes. Are you a fan of public displays of affection? I don’t mind some PDA, just keep it G. When did you last attend a yard sale? Years ago when a family friend used to do them. Do you wish your life were simpler or more interesting? More interesting. What goals do you wish to accomplish tomorrow? Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, my goals are to eat a lot. When is your birthday? July 28th. Which is worse: going blind or deaf? Bad question. What was the best part of today? Nothing. Do you attempt to stay away from drama? Yes.

What liquid did you last drink? Soda. Do you ever prefer to be alone? Yes. I need my alone time. Have you ever had a deadly animal as a pet? No. Favorite Disney movie? Alice in Wonderland and Toy Story. Have you ever been to the beach? Many times, I love it. If you have, how many times have you been? Numerous times. What was your dream occupation at age ten? I wanted to be a teacher. Are you terrified at the idea of weight-gain? No. I’ve never had an issue with gaining weight, I’ve actually always been a bit underweight. A little more so now given some health issues, and I need to gain some weight. Do you drink a lot of water? Yes. Does your room have carpet or hard-wood floors? Carpet. Do you take naps daily? Not daily, but often. Who were you named after? No one. Do you plan on traveling this spring or summer? Spring and summer have passed. Do you know anyone who is colorblind? No. Have you ever been a teacher’s pet? So they say. What is your absolute favorite hobby? Reading and Tumblr. How many times a day do you brush your teeth? Once. Ever been to a tanning bed before? No. Are you satisfied with your financial stability? We have our necessities, but it gets stressful.  Who is your favorite actor/actress? Alexander Skarsgard.

Are your nails painted? They aren’t. What’s the meanest thing you’ve ever said to someone? Hopefully nothing. Do you ever accidentally talk to inanimate objects? I yell at inanimate objects when I get frustrated with them. What’s your favorite flavor of ice cream? Strawberry. Have you ever kissed someone of the same gender? No. Do you receive any hate mail? No. Have you ever sent a letter in the mail? Yes. If you could, would you have a pen pal? We did that in 3rd grade. What color are the pants you’re wearing? I’m wearing black and white leggings. Have you ever had a stalker? I haven’t. What is your life philosophy? I don’t know. Who last sent you a goodnight text message? *shrug* Do you own any clothes that are your favorite color? Yeah. Have you ever been in a hot tub before? Yes. What’s your favorite comedy movie? I have a few.

[thenovelist101]

Wandered

Chapter Four-

The day was so entirely normal that Vincent felt a little sick. The next day was normal. It was normal. His little naïve brain forgot that even if something happened to him the world still kept on spinning.

Vincent knew his father was on a business trip ahead of time, so he knew that he wasn’t present in the house, and he could hear his mother’s heels tapping around the tiles.

He found it supremely odd that nothing was mentioned about yesterday. Extremely odd. Today was Monday, which meant school. He got himself ready with his suspenders and cargo shorts. His hair was brushed more or less. Vincent took his book and slate and sat on the top of the staircase. He observed his mother being normal from below.

Mirai plopped down next to him. “What you doing?” The four year old said. Vincent shrugged. His chin rested on his hand, his arm sitting on his leg. He was slouched over. His voice sounded dazed. “Do you think that everything will change? Or will it just be ‘normal’. Of course, normal never really is normal.” Mirai looked at him with curious eyes. “What you mean?” He sighed. “I wouldn’t really expect you to understand. I have to go.” “School?” He nodded and ruffled her hair. “Stay out of trouble, okay?” “Mm, okay.” He passed his mother and muttered a goodbye. There was no response.

When he got home that day the feeling of hollowness was still in the house. It felt so empty, like when you open a gift to see nothing inside.

When his mother was folding clothes, he decided to just get it over with. “So about yesterday...” He could see her body tense. “What’s going on with Mirai...” His voice trailed off when his mother went up to him. She looked down and slapped his mouth. There was no pain because the shock overcame him. “Do not speak of that child in this house. Outside of here she is nothing. Even if people know she exists, act like there is no one to begin with. You are an only child. Is that clear?” Vincent quickly nodded. “Wash up for dinner and do your homework.” Vincent nodded and ran out of the room.

No extra words were exchanged about that day, for the next seven years. No words about that strange Alchemist or the scary Mayor or that cage that Mirai was held in. None of that.

—————————————

Mirai grew up knowing one thing: Do as you’re told, and you won’t get hurt. Don’t speak unless you are allowed to be spoken too, and you won’t get hurt. More important: never complain. Never ask for food, never ask for new clothes. If you are allowed outside, savor in everything because you may be locked in a closet for the next week. This was the survival guide she had followed.

Vincent was always the savior. That always bothered Mirai. She could never fend for herself. Of course he could never stop the beatings, but he could always call out on his parents and give an extra cookie to her whenever he had the chance. Sometimes she felt too guilty of this. Mirai felt guilt of having nice things.

One thing that bonded the Merger siblings was them sharing a slight obsession over cookies. When Vincent was twelve and Mirai was seven, they both stared through the glass of the bakery. All the fresh goods looked so desirable, and the smell was heavenly.

“I want one.” She whispered. “Same. Look at that cake! Vanilla...” “and chocolate...” Then the baker came out of the store and yelled at them to get away from the display.

While they were walking, Vince said, “Grandfather used to make cookies. They were really good.” “I don’t think I was old enough to remember that.” “Yeah, but they were really good.” “Er, okay.” “You know he loved you.” “I know.” She said quietly.

If you looked at Mirai and Vince walking side by side, you would find them awfully different. Mirai had dark, rich, wild brown hair while Vincent had wavy reddish brown hair that sometimes got curly. Depended on the season. She had dark brown eyes and he had hazel. One was dressed better than the other, and the other looked like a maid.

Their personalities were quite similar. They were both stubborn, so their contentions were ruthless. They had the same mindset when it came to certain situations. They also had a need of independence. Furthermore, the duo were pretty harmonious most times. The age gap however, made Vince a lot more mature as well as self-aware. Mirai would thank God for that. If he didn’t have such a good behavior, her life would be hell.

Despite Mirai’s differentiations and her solitary confinement, she befriended a girl named Lavender Allen. She was a girl with beautiful straight brown hair and dark skin. She lived on the more poorer side of the city, but Mirai could care less. “I’ve got three big brothers, one big sister and a little sister. My daddy works a lot and my mommy died.” “Oh, that’s sad. I’m sorry.” “It’s okay.” That was very much the conversation of two eight year olds, but childhood friendships had to start somewhere.

Mirai felt an incompetent jealousy from that sentence though. Although Lavender didn’t go to school like she did and lived the hustle life, she still had numerous loved ones. “My big big brother left us a little while ago,” she said a day later. “He still says hi now and then.” Mirai could hear the twinge of sadness in her voice. Lavender and Mirai were at the marketplace looking at the fruit and such. Of course they couldn’t buy any.

Family betrayal was a very taboo thing, but it was very common. It was sickening, cold, and harsh. What made it worse was that it was someone you loved, someone you could confide in. Then that family member took it upon themselves to leave and never exist in your life again.

Mirai would never even come to terms if Vincent left her. To her, that would be like losing a piece of her heart. “At least you have your sisters.” Mirai said thoughtfully. Lavender smiled and held a bright apple in her hand. “Yeah, I guess I do.” Lavender turned to her.

“I really like your name by the way. I don’t think I ever told you.” Mirai was embarrassed. “Thanks.”

Mirai looked around to see her mother talking to some fancy and posh ladies. Relief flooded her. It was that feeling like when you and you’re friend were talking about something private and another figure randomly came in and overheard.

She didn’t want her mother to hear, because there was one thing certain. Her name was just as bad as no Santa Claus for Christmas. She didn’t want to hear her mother complain about Lavender, who did nothing wrong. Her racist comments hit her harder than the bruises on Mirai’s arm.

Mirai was a huge accident prone— at least that’s what Lavender thought. Unfortunately for Mirai, Lavender picked up on these nasty wounds. “I tripped on a rock.” Mirai would say, or “The door hit my face.” A door named Father. She thought. Lavender was her supportive friend for a good while.

Last fall they had a conversation about small stuff. They weren’t used to the typical school drama. They usually talked about food and who could would be the best at Rock Paper Scissors (Lavender usually won). Although it was sunny the winds were freezing, and winter would be covering the town with it’s snow. “You should be a nurse.” Mirai said in an alleyway. Her back was laid against the cold brick wall and she had a bag of vegetables in her lap.

The two were out of reach from the guards. She greatly disliked the soldiers in her area, even if they were trying to protect. They always seemed to have an eye on her for some reason. Mirai mentioned it to Vincent one time, but he quickly brushed it off and changed the topic.

Lavender was wrapping a bandage around her arm. “You need to stop getting hurt Mirai. Also, being a nurse costs too much money. And besides,” She knotted the gauze and wiped her forehead. “Most nurses get sent to Warret. And that place gives me the shivers.” “Well, we’re only ten. You still have time to think about it.”

“I’ll try to man.” Mirai pushed herself to sit up. Then she burped. Lavender laughed. “Sorry. That soup really must’ve hit the spot.” Her friend shook her head. “Gross. I’m wondering who on earth is actually going to be attracted by you.” Mirai’s mouth dropped. “What do you mean?” “Well you don’t exactly wear nice clothes for a wealthy family. Not that it’s bad. You don’t sit straight and you always talk back. It’s funny how you work.” Mirai thought for a moment. “Well I’m not pretty like you. I’m pretty crazy as well. Someone who likes the rebellious type would like me I guess.” “Mirai, you are not rebellious. A clutterbucket, yes. Not rebellious.” Mirai rolled her eyes. “Then what am I?” She muttered.

The answer was very obvious. I’m a magical being that isn’t supposed to exist. A slave to my own parents and a burden to my brother. Then something shocked her. “Well, you’re my friend. That’s really special. You’re also very smart. Can read a book when I can’t even read the date.” Mirai looked at her dumbfounded. “Really?” “Yeah stupid.” “Oh yeah. Guess I forgot.” Lavender giggled. “You really know your humor.”

Mirai was very proud of her education. Now here’s the lovely question: How on earth does a girl with no access of school get an education? From their older brother, of course. Vincent taught her basic math and the English alphabet when she was 6, and she had cherished that ever since. Every morning she would wake up and repeat the letters and create random math problems until someone yelled at her to start cleaning. When Vincent turned eleven, he lost interest in teaching. Mirai didn’t complain.

Sometimes she thought Vincent was a little too protective over her. Or maybe it was the Stockholm syndrome seeping in. Mirai decided it was best not to tell Vincent of her injuries most of the time. It would be too risky. In the same year she got pushed off the staircase and made her leg bad. Work still had to be done, so she went around the house with a limp and tried to ignore her pounding leg.

When she had free time she was scrubbing cold water onto her sore leg in the bathroom. She was usually very strategic in covering her scars from Vince, and Lavender was usually there to aid wounds.

There was a knock on the door. “Mirai, what’re you doing in there?” His voice sounded deep and then hoarse. Puberty was a very curious thing. “Um, nothing.” “Nothing is very much something.” He called. “I’m fine.” “Are you pooping or pissing?” “No.” “Are you bathing?” “...no...” “Are you cleaning?” “Nah.” She could hear Vincent’s over exaggerated sigh. “I guess I’m gonna have to come in. I need to piss!”

“Wait, NO-“ Vincent opened the door and dropped his wrench. He always seemed to carry something mechanical these days. She could hear it cling to the floor as he saw her blackish leg.

Vince cursed, which was alarming because he never did that. “I-I need to talk to Mother.” He said urgently turning around. They were going to have a very cross fight. She hated those. “No!” Mirai said. Vincent whipped his head back. “Why not?” “Because... because...” Mirai looked down. “You don’t want me to provoke anything, right?” She nodded. Vincent scratched the back of his neck and sighed. “‘right then. We need to get that treated though.” “Lavender can do it.” She blurted.

“I’m not surprised. That girl can do some real magic.” He said with a grin. She rolled her eyes. “Haha you are so funny.” Vincent stayed in the bathroom and the looked at each other. “I seriously need to go.” “Oh right.” She laughed a little as she limped her way out of the bathroom. It always astounded her how tall Vincent was. It was normal male height, but looking at 15 year old from a 10 year old’s perspective is scary.

If Mirai were to tell you anything she did that was bad, it would be probably anything. But this account was the most illegal: When Mirai was finally out of the house she immediately searched for Lavender.

She saw her with younger sister on her back near her street. “Mirai! How are you? I haven’t seen you in a long time. Are you okay?” She hugged her. Mirai was surprised by all these questions. She was mostly concerned for Lavender. Her eyes were worn out and she looked more skinny than usual. “I’m okay. My parents wanted me to stay home.” She didn’t mention the blood she put in a tube though. Two days ago was her yearly experiment samples for Sir Haberdash, but Mirai didn’t know it as that.

Usually her mother would tell her to cut her some hair or spit. This year it was blood. She remember seeing the knife in her hand and felt uneasy. It was only a fraction of a minute and it got bandaged up anyways. Mirai never wanted to cut herself again. She wasn’t allowed to leave the house after.

Mirai would give the sample and it would get sent away. Mirai thought of this as an offering to stay alive, for she had no clue what it was actually for.

“What about you?” Mirai asked. Lavender quickly nodded. “Good. I was just walking around since I was bored. Nat’s been gaining weight.” She gestured her head towards the baby straddled on her back. “Well she’s growing. She ain’t fat for no reason.” Lavender chuckled. Lavender had a bit of a breathing problem, so her laughs always sounded like wheezes.

Since the two were bored, they went to the schoolhouse. They saw people go inside. They stalked on the fence surrounding the school. “My brother’s over there.” Mirai said. She pointed upwards to the second floor of the building. “That’s cool.” Natalie started to mumble. Lavender patted her down and she stopped. “Do you ever want to go to school?” Mirai asked. “Of course! My sister never went either, it was right when they passed the act that woman could go, and the word hadn’t really got out in that time.” “Ah, makes sense.” Lavender smiled. “I hope Natalie will go.” “She’ll be awesome. In two years it starts, right?” She nodded. It was a shame Mirai would never be able to watch her younger sister go.

When it became noon, the three hadn’t eaten. Mirai could handle it, but Lavender couldn’t. Or more precise, the baby couldn’t. She started crying.

“Hush Nat!” She scolded. They were near the town square. “Shut that baby up!” A white man said reading his newspaper. “Sorry, please Nat!” Mirai could tell she was hungry.

Lavender whispered into Natalie’s ear, “When Brother comes back we can eat, okay?” Nat didn’t seem to bother. Mirai sighed. Lavender’s food depended on how much her brother and sister made, and it wasn’t a lot to begin with. She knew that.

“How long has your brother been gone?” Mirai asked. “Two days.” She said.

Mirai looked at the Marketplace and then at her two comrades. She eyed the carts of fruit being stocked in, and looked at her hands. Anyone here would beat her sorry for this, but it was worth a try.

“We need to eat.” She stated. “But how? We’ve got no money.” Lavender said. Mirai quirked a brow and smirked. “Let’s steal.”

[gingervsblondie]

Blondie Brings Up Baby (1939)

8:38 PM, Thursday, 26 September 2019

Nineteen. Ni- Ni- Nineteen.

Ni- Ni- Nineteen.

Nineteen thirty-nine.

How does our favourite zany

Nuclear familial vignette

Get themselves into another casse-tête?

Dagwood’s filled with sandwiches while Flournoy’s filled with regret

And Alexander’s traumatized

You ready for more yet?

Blondie Brings Up Baby. Let’s get into it.

By the way, we’ve got a new head screenwriter, Gladys Lehman. Our old friend Dick Flournoy’s still on the Wikipedia page as “story by, (uncredited)” though.

8:40

I don’t know if I’ve only just noticed this or if this movie just gave the first indication of it, but Dagwood is really bad at his job.

8:42

8:43

UHHH. There’s a woman in the Bumsteads’ house. There hasn’t been a woman in the Bumsteads’ house before. I have no idea who she is and the movie moved swiftly on without explaining who she is.

8:46

UHHHHHHHH. They cut from a scene of Dagwood and Blondie at a police station telling a receptionist that Alexander is missing, after he didn’t show up to school, to a scene where Dagwood is in a shed, and COMPLETELY INEXPLICABLY, a bunch of police with tommy guns have him surrounded and start firing on him and throwing tear gas bombs.

I have no fucking clue what is going on in this movie.

8:51

UHHHHHHHHHHHHH. All of that was the build up to the intro. The intro is playing now.

The movie hasn’t even started yet.

WHAT.

WHAT IS HAPPENING.

They haven’t had anything before the intro on any of the other movies.

8:52

OKAY. SO.

The last few movies I’ve watched on YouTube. They’re in the public domain anyway as far as I can tell. But I couldn’t find a version of Blondie Brings Up Baby with good enough quality, so I switched to Amazon Prime.

Turns out, I’ve just discovered, all the Blondie movies on Amazon Prime have 3-5 minutes of scenes with ABSOLUTELY NO CONTEXT pinned onto the beginning before the intro. So I just watched 4 minutes and 40 seconds of Blondie Brings Up Baby SPOILERS.

And I’m furious about it.

9:05

There’s a “huh?” that Dagwood does in these whenever he does a double-take, and it’s gotta be my least favourite recurring bit. They use it like a rimshot or a catchphrase to punctuate jokes, and 100% of the time it just extends something that wasn’t funny.

9:11

See okay: He just did one, but silently. There was no “huh?”, just Dagwood looking confused. And it was a little bit funny! That’s all it took. No “huh?”.

9:16

K, this time Blondie’s the one being a bad parent. A guy showed up at the door offering a free IQ test for Alexander. Is that a thing that happened in the 30s? No idea, but it’s what’s happening in the movie so let’s just go with it. Alvin, Alexander’s friend/enemy/neighbour who he occasionally brains with a fucking brick, has been over and has been calling Alexander (and also Dagwood) a dumbbell all day. So to get revenge on Alvin, Blondie is getting all competitive about the IQ test, telling Alexander that he has to beat Alvin.

It’s giving me flashbacks to a music teacher I had in high school. We were going to a concert band competition in another province, and she told us she wouldn’t accept us bringing home anything other than gold. In the middle of the performance, we lost time with each other (because we’d never played in an auditorium and weren’t used to the acoustics) and had to start the song over. We got bronze. On the bus ride home, she didn’t talk to us. I don’t think she even looked at us.

The next year, I took drama instead of music.

9:27

Ok. So. The dude with the IQ test watched Alexander build a house out of toy blocks. Based on that, he told Blondie that Alexander is a genius, and that his IQ is 168.

(What follows is me disassembling the logic of this, which I’ll shortly learn was a pointless endeavour.)

First of all, no way can he determine an IQ that specific based on a house Alexander built out of toy blocks. Secondly, I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t be telling a child they’re a genius, since they’d end up developing less motivation, thinking that their accomplishments are a result of natural gifts rather than hard work. And third, UNLESS they turn around and reveal that the IQ test, which I’ll note happened off-screen, was somehow wrong and Alexander isn’t actually a genius, then I am going to spend the remaining movies in this series frustrated at their continued insistence on calling him “Baby Dumpling.” Which, you know, I already am anyway. Although maybe demeaning him like that will balance out them telling him he’s a genius.

9:34

Oh ok. The test wasn’t wrong. The IQ dude is just a con artist selling encyclopedias.

Should’ve seen that coming.

9:38

Dagwood thought IQ meant temperature, and came rushing home thinking Alexander was terribly sick. It cut to him ripping up the encyclopedias Blondie just bought, saying “This guy’s crazy, coming around here with books at a time like this.”

What an insufferable doofus.

9:41

I’m not a fan of Blondie entirely falling for this con artist’s BS. I feel like she hasn’t been that gullible before. She’s gotten mad at Dagwood based on comical misunderstandings, but that’s been understandable based on the context she didn’t have. But we as an audience are given just as much context as Blondie is to know that this dude is swindling her. It just makes her seem stupid.

9:48

Teacher: “Well, how do you do young man? So you want to start to school?”

Blondie: “NO MA'AM!”

Mood.

9:51

Man, elementary school is a bonkers institution. Just send your small child to a building they cannot leave full of strangers who have absolute authority over them, and are sometimes totally insane people, where they’ll be taught things they not only cannot use but definitely will not remember because they’re tiny tiny children. And sometimes the insane adult strangers will yell at your child. For not behaving. And they’re not behaving because they’re in a place they don’t want to be and cannot leave where strangers have the authority to yell at them for mistakes they’re making FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THEIR LIVES BECAUSE THEY’RE SMALL SMALL CHILDREN.

10:11

Huh. I think they just broke the canon? I’ve been calling Baby Dumpling Alexander because the Wikipedia for the first movie listed him as Alexander "Baby Dumpling" Bumstead, but in Blondie Brings Up Baby, they just had this exchange:

Alexander: “[They beat me up] ’cause my name’s Baby Dumpling.”

Dagwood: “Well, your real name’s Dagwood, after me. Maybe we’ll call you that now that you’re going to school?”

Alexander: “Noooo. Guess I’ll stay Baby Dumpling.”

I dunno if his real name’s Alexander in the comic strip and they just forgot while they were writing this? They haven’t called him Alexander in the other movies, I was just basing that entirely off the Wikipedia article. I can’t believe they’d make 28 movies without a clear story bible.

(Future Euan looked it up. In the comic strip, Baby Dumpling grew up into a teenager, and became Alexander.)

I’m still gonna call him Alexander by the way.

10:17

As these movies have gone on, I’ve been increasingly concerned about the wellbeing of the dog. Like, the real dog, behind the scenes. I really hope they weren’t abusing her to get her to do all the stuff she does. But I can’t say I’d be surprised if they were. She kinda gives the vibe of “dog doing impressive tricks because they’ll punish her if she doesn’t.” Maybe I’m wrong though. Maybe they had, like, a super good treat to give her every time she did a trick.

10:23

10:24

God I wish I were watching Peanuts.

10:25

Or reading Peanuts.

10:26

You ever notice how in old movies when they cross-fade between two shots, there’ll be an abrupt change in the brightness of the footage right before it fades, and then again after it stops fading? One day I’ll learn why that was.

(Here’s the answer, courtesy of future Euan: https://www.quora.com/How-did-movies-do-a-cross-fade-with-real-film)

10:36

Only moment I’ve liked so far: Daisy’s gone missing (because a dogcatcher caught her and brought her to the pound). The mailman, a young guy on a bike who’s had a recurring bit through every movie where he whistles and Daisy comes running to take the paper from him, just whistled, and instead of Daisy, Alexander came to take the mail and tells him Daisy’s missing. And he says “As soon as I’m finished delivering, I’ll look for her. I’ll look on my bike.”

That’s kinda sweet. No sweet moments between Dagwood and Blondie yet this time, but one sweet moment between a mailman who’s barely talked before and a dog.

10:42

There’s a lot of punching in these movies. Like, just Dagwood suddenly becoming infuriated and decking someone in the face.

What a violent doofus.

10:47

Dagwood got arrested for assaulting the dude who got him fired and didn’t have enough to pay it off so he got put in jail. His boss, Mr. Dithers, came to pay it off for him, while the dude’s in court.

Dithers: “How much is it your honour?”

Judge: “Ten dollars.”

Dithers: “Is that all that cost?”

Judge: “Mm.”

(Dithers punches the dude out)

Dithers: (offering money) “Here’s another one, your honour.”

I don’t want to hear another word about video games inciting violence in young people. Goddamn the rest of culture is responsible for glorifying violence.

10:53

Alexander: “You’re a girl. I don’t like girls.”

Girl: “Why?”

Alexander: “Oh… Don’t know. I learned it in school.”

Ho-ly shit. Movie spitting straight truth.

10:59

Might as well drop this here:

I’ve decided that once I’ve watched all the movies, I’m gonna write my own Blondie, A 60 page screenplay with all the hallmarks and the structure of the other ones. I mean, if I’m gonna be dragging them through the dirt, it’s only fair that I see if I could do any better.

11:02

I Want a Dog For Christmas, Charlie Brown. That’d be a good one to be watching right about now.

11:07

No, I tell you what:

There are Blondie movies for every year between 1939 and 1950, EXCEPT for 1944. So that’s when I’ll write my script. Once I’ve watched the first 14, every Blondie movie between 1939 and 1943, I’ll write the Blondie movie to have come out in 1944.

11:10

I now have the context for why the police surrounded the shed that Dagwood was in. It still doesn’t make sense though. He was trespassing on a rich guy’s yard, a gardener knocked him out with a shovel and dragged him into the shed, and then presumably called for all of the police to come pick him up, and bring enough weapons to keep a city-wide riot at bay.

11:13

So the police thought Dagwood was somehow responsible for Alexander and the rich dude’s daughter going missing?

Well I’m riveted.

11:16

Or Why, Charlie Brown, Why?

11:19

“You see, playing with other children is the solution. Oh, if only this city had some place where this sort of thing could be carried out. Where the weak children could get courage from the strong, and the strong could learn compassion.”

So not school then.

“Why, I could do something like that. A sort of home for children! I’ll build it myself. It’ll be light and airy, with plenty of windows and playgrounds.”

THE ORPHANAGE

11:25

This movie ends with Dagwood getting insulted again by Alvin. He finds a tear gas bomb that he put in his pocket earlier when the police were attacking him, and says “Here’s a nice ball for you to play with.”

Dagwood just tried to tear gas a child.

What a dangerous doofus.

And once again, no Dagwood Sandwich Watch 2019. However, I’ll give the movie a rating all the same.

Turns out Willie Best isn’t in the movie. Wikipedia was wrong. I’m guessing somebody copied and pasted the cast from the first movie, so that they could put in the regular cast, and forgot to take him out. And the movie wasn’t, as I assumed from the title, about Dagwood being a stay-at-home father. Which, I’ve only just realized, is still me thinking Blondie means Dagwood because he’s so much more prominent in the franchise, and I somehow still haven’t managed to internalize that his name is Dagwood. It’s like I’ve learned nothing since I started this. ANYWAY point is the movie wasn’t racist or sexist. It was just boring. Terribly terribly boring.

My rating is: One Dagwood Sandwich with some ham on the outside and nothing on the inside. Blame Amazon.