#*distant pterodactyl screaming*

[starfleetwitch]

Do you ever just feel the uncontrollable compulsion to go out to a field in the middle of nowhere so you can unleash the female anxiety induced rage via monstrous screaming?

But then you remember you live in a city with cardboard thin walls and may startle the local mice?

Yeah. Same.

[amuseoffyre]

Fyre's Convention Adventures - The Q&A Panels & Closing Ceremony

Full disclosure, I did intend to do a full write-up of all of the panels, but frankly with 3 hours of them each day, back to back, and fanmeets in the middle, I can only really remember dribs and drabs of them, so I’ll do them in one big post.

Unfortunately, I missed most of the Con and Nathan one for the Vico fanmeet. It sounded like it was chaotic af with an extreme appreciation of cheese, so I can’t really say much on that one.

They did discuss which muppets they thought their characters would be and promptly realised they both knew very few muppets, though Con adamantly – gleefully – insisted Lucius would be Miss Piggy. I think Izzy was Sam the Eagle.

I think that was when Our Little Tiny Izzy Fan (she’s four) asked what their favourite dinosaurs were and Con said “Do you know pterodactyl?” and was immediately heckled because it wasn’t a dinosaur and told everyone to fuck off, laughing, saying “LIKE I WAS SAYING, it’s not a dinosaur, but–” to hoots of laughter. I think he asked what her favourite was and then said that was his favourite too.

Second one was Kristian and Vico, who were so much fun together. There was a lot of discussion of the horror genre and Vico fully admitted they’re a wuss when it comes to horror stuff because it gets in their head and they end up having nightmares. HOWEVER they also said they would love to be in a horror film for the running around and screaming all over the place.

Kristian is a big fan of the genre and mentioned a few of his favourites, which I can’t even remember now because the whole experience was such a wild ride of aaaaaaaa! He also thought Vico would have a lot of fun in the horror genre and he’s done a few himself.

Vico talked about their experience of discovering and accepting their polyamory, being born out of a relationship that went open when it became long-distant because of work and how that did and didn’t work. They also talked about the work it takes to figure out the balance and that there’s something about falling in love and having your heart broken at the same time that’s indescribable.

Kristian talked about his craft projects and how he has the ADHD tendency to start a dozen things but never actually finish them. He also wanted to bring his hot glue gun with him in case diamantes fell off his blinged out shoes, but it was confiscated at the airport.

If I remember right, he also mentioned he got his start in music because his mum had him start piano (I think) at a young age and hated it, but he moved into guitar and other kinds of music and found what he likes and bloomed from there.  He’s also started writing poetry and is enjoying exploring what he can do with it.

Next up was Rhys’s solo panel.

His Big in Japan show was brought up and he said he’d been planning to do more of them but then the pandemic happened, and seemed very pleased when people said how nice it was to see a travel show where the host was genuinely curious and excited by the culture.

It was compared to Michael Palin’s travel shows as well, which led into the influence of Monty Python on him. He also confirmed he’d had the privilege of seeing the Monty Python live show with all of the then-living Pythons and met a couple of them as well.

He got very excited to talk about working with Taika and how he wished Taika would do conventions like this to see the amount of love there was for Ed and his performance.

Someone asked about the time he’d appeared on a float in a parade and was asked what he would have if he was on a float again and it veered rapidly into silliness about being a condor flying over a Costa Rican volcano and then descending into the volcano which was full of little aliens, who were controlling the hydraulics.

I’m afraid I can’t remember much more of that one because I was v. hungry and distracted by it.

The Sunday panels started with Vico and Nathan and sadly, I only saw the start of theirs because I had another fanmeet.

However, I was there for the characters they would like to be in any film. Vico wanted to be Darth Maul (Yes plz!) and Nathan – clearly still yearning for Wicked – said he would love to be the Wicked Witch of the West from the Wizard of Oz.

Then there was a question about their favourite pride flag based purely on the aesthetics. Nathan admitted that he finds the rainbow – especially when used by Rainbow Capitalism – a bit tacky. He settled on the lesbian flag, while Vico – after some consideration – declared that the bear flag is the coolest one. “Lesbians and tigers and bears, oh my” Nathan said. I feel like that needs to be on a shirt.

I nipped off to Kristian’s panel during that one and came back a few minutes into the Con and Rhys panel, which was ridiculously funny :D

I’m not sure how they got onto the subject of sex tapes (partly, from the sound of it, related to saying and doing things in interviews that they didn’t want released to the public) and there was a running gag of yelling “gimme the tapes!” every time they said something a bit rude, which was a lot. Specifically for someone called Kevin who was in charge of them.

Con: if this isn’t on a t-shirt at the next con, I’ll be disappointed Rhys: they’ll forget about it by next week Con: Nah, this one’ll stick.

The rest of this’ll be all over the place because I can’t remember what happened when anymore.

They were both asked what they’d learned from each other. Con’s response: how to kiss. Rhys’s response: how to be good. They got talking about the infamous candle scene between them and it went roughly like this:

Rhys: And the scene where you were whacking off the candles and Stede was watching Con: and whacking off XD Rhys: XD Con: there was definitely a frisson there Rhys: Yeah and Stede’s quite innocent when it comes to that sort of physical stuff … Con: That scene actually went on a bit longer. There was a close-up moment where we were nipple to nipple. Con: … Con: though it was probably more like nipple to navel on him.

They got asked about other behind the scenes stuff (what was the hardest scene, or something like that?) and Con had a justifiable grumble about the fact they said Rhys would toss a handful of coffee grounds at him in the duel in 1x6. He asked if it was safe and one of the bts folk was like “yeah, of course, look, I’ll do it myself” and then started swearing because it hurt. But they still did it and Con ended up in a time out because he couldn’t see for a bit.

Rhys said he loved that scene when he got pinned to the mast even though it was very hard because “I love prancing about”. No, really? I couldn’t tell XD

I’m getting a bit muddled about whether Rhys waxed lyrical about Taika in this one as well as his own, but he certainly said something about the bath tub scene being one of his favourites because it’s such intense intimate stuff to do and having your friend there with you, doing it and experiencing it with you is such a powerful thing.

They got pretty sincere with each other as well, Rhys saying that seeing the quality of acting from Con really motivated him to up his acting skills, because seeing what others were doing really inspired him. Likewise, Con said that being around the improve skills of Rhys, Taika and the crew intimidated him at first because he’s very much a by-the-script guy and in S1, he was still a bit uncomfortable with it, but by S2, he felt secure enough with the crew and the cast to do more.

Con also mentioned what he had imagined in an S3 where Izzy survived: Stede and Izzy becoming closer and tolerating (if not necessarily liking) each other because of their shared love of Ed. It’s the kind of dynamic I was already starting to enjoy with them in S2, especially Izzy still roasting him while teaching him and calling him Captain.

He also said if we want David Fane at a con (and we should!), we need to make noise and ask for him, because he would love to do one.

There was a question about whether Izzy would perform Stede and Ed’s matelotage (which he would be able to do as first mate to two captains) and Con said nah, because Izzy isn’t romantic and he doesn’t think they’d want him to. “He’d prefer to watch them fuck”. Thank you for that Conathan O’Nonathan.

It was actually really nice seeing them talk because both of them naturally fall into mirroring each other’s body language, both crossing their legs in the same direction and folding their arms in the same position and the like.

Also, seeing two men their age burst into giggles and smack each other on the arm was a treat.

The next panel was meant to be just Kristian, but he hauled Nathan along with him and was recording it for his podcast. I unfortunately missed a big chunk of it because I was at Con’s fan-meet (rundown posted the other day).

I did come back in to them discussing their Walk On music. Nathan insisted it would be “Here Come The Girls” and Kristian being like “I already have some for when I’m working” (If anyone can remember what it is, let me know). One of them ended up deciding that Black Velvet would be a good one.

I can’t actually remember much about the rest of that one. Possibly something about their choice of karaoke songs and Nathan inexplicably having a funny story of a pig called Kevin, which got such a roar of laughter that he looked v. puzzled. Someone must’ve explained about Con and Rhys’s Kevin bit by the closing ceremony.

I think that’s my memory all tapped out for now, but suffice to say it was an A Lot of a weekend and I enjoyed so much of it :)

I'll give one last shout out to the closing ceremony because there was nothing quite like watching the expressions of a bunch of actors who didn't particularly care about hiding their emotions as the con-runner made a self-congratulatory speech about how good his cons are and how famous his guests are 🤣

Also, Vico and Con both made absolutely wonderful speeches, Vico about finding joy within community and remembering that together we're stronger and better than they can ever know.

And Con began with "Fuck 'em!" and launched into a speech about the loud ones on the right being dinosaurs who would be extinct soon and the whole room went "Ohhhhh" because Tiny Little Izzy fan who loves dinosaurs was still present. Con went "...shit!" as the rest of the cast laughed at him trying to backtrack and insist her favourite would be fine and then laughed sheepishly and said "way to fuck up a speech". But his message still stands - they're outdated and they're gonna be fossils soon and we are stronger and better as a community.

ngl, I wasn't the only having a wee cry over both of them. The entire vibe of the con has been so uplifting and so powerful and encouraging and as Vico said, things like this are the things that fill our cup and we have to hold onto them.

[dragonfelling]

Find word tag :-)

Saw this floating around and wanted to do my own

My words to find, and the words I want y'all to find: Heart, Sweat, Conversation, Returned

@the-majestic-pterodactyl-senpai @bloodmoodtrash @albatris @tracle0 @trixierosewrites and anyone else interested

--

Heart

Jeremias sat on the couch where Amara died.

His hands white knuckle grasped his knees. His twisted, forever-broken left hand screamed at him to stop but he couldn't. He stared ahead, whole body locked up into a still, stiff statue. The only part of him that moved was his chest. He couldn't stop himself from breathing, and he could not stop his broken heart from stop pumping.

Sweat

She was her father's girl, though.

Their little fighter. She had fucking pride. She deserved her title. She deserved the fucking world, paid by her own blood, sweat and tears.

Apprentice of Crown Mirka.

She brought her hand up in a swinging arc, and in an instant there was a moment of sunrise that lit the top of the wall.

Bright, dazzling fire.

Conversation

Lucy did not bow his head as scripted and did not speak to greet himself. He went pale. His eyes went wide. His heart raced a million miles a minute.

The Chalat Drake in his arm perked up, his quills moving in response to Lucius’ breathing becoming increasingly panicked.

Chien didn't quite notice at first, too focused on speaking with Akakios.

The man turned his head to Luce while the Crown spoke, blinking slowly down at him. His head tilted a bit, almost recognizing the terrified face of the small man cowering there… before turning back to Chien to continue the conversation.

Home

Everything felt alright in these quiet moments. There was no hurt. No need to numb the pain or forget the distant and recent past.

In this short time the only thing that mattered was the now.

All that mattered was Lilybelle. Innis’ little girl.

The girl he came home from the war to, much to his surprise. He did not think he’d have Anya when he returned, let alone the child that she said she would not keep. She sat on the end of the couch between Innis’ legs and parallel to hun. She lounged back just like how he laid, her own book propped up just like him.

[spookyspaghettisundae]

Teeth Glistened in the Gloom

Large, leathery wings flapped. Every flap thundered with tremendous force. Every flap produced a gale, whipping up chunks of frozen earth and pine.

The pterodactyl screeched again, having mounted its prey on Appalachian soil.

Mischchenko’s arm broke. A bone’s audible crack blended into the cacophony caused by the prehistoric creature. Then the woman’s pained scream joined the choir.

It all happened so fast. In the blink of an eye, their relief over having survived a swarm of mutant insects was erased by the big winged beast attacking them.

Both Chloe Grant and Valentín Ruiz acted on pure instinct. Former soldiers, drilled and disciplined as they were, they responded in kind to the animal’s brute force. The futuristic, silvery rifles in their hands flared up, discharging electric blasts. The EMD batteries whined after every shot.

One, two, three, with a deliberate delay before the fourth blast. Grant and Ruiz pelted the pterodactyl, causing it to stagger and stumble, backing off its prey while its body jiggled and jittered from the havoc the EMD’s were wreaking upon its muscles and nervous system.

Mischchenko was crawling away from the animal as the shots landed, and the beast reeled.

Then, like a dark angel, the menacing silhouette of a second pterodactyl swooped down upon them from the mist and the treetops.

Their EMD rifles had been set to low power output, to conserve energy and slow the onslaught of the insect swarm prior. Now, those settings were too low to incapacitate either pterodactyl outright. As Carter once put it, until they readjusted settings, the two field operatives were currently wielding glorified cattle prods.

The winged dinosaur on the ground shook its head, as if to regain its bearings in a very human fashion. It was far from unconscious, only somewhat stunned, and that sensation would wear off soon.

Its wings spread with a menacing span, matching that of the one swooping down.

All in the blink of an eye.

How was it that time ever stretched into infinity when things were unbearably slow, while being contracted into painful shortness whenever pressure was at its worst, and the danger overbearing?

Ruiz was caught off-guard, busy adjusting his rifle to maximum output. Grant saved his hide by taking a potshot at the second pterodactyl, in the split-second before it could pounce on him in its crashing descent.

This, too, was not enough to stop the beast outright. It wasn’t even enough to change its trajectory. The only good thing that came from her shot was how it alerted Ruiz to the pterodactyl in the nick of time.

He ducked. Shouted in pain. His EMD rifle went flying in a different direction than the creature as it curved back upwards with another mighty flap of its wings, another gale from the leathery thunderclap. The pterodactyl had winged him, but he had been more fortunate than Mischchenko, emerging from the hit without any broken bones.

Mischchenko’s crawling had taken her to retrieve her own EMD rifle. Unfortunately, her now broken right arm afforded her only poor aim. The shot she took at the ascending pterodactyl missed, singing the firs around their clearing.

Ruiz dove for his rifle while Grant carefully lined up a shot at the same time. The pterodactyl’s deadly shadow circled high above in the fog.

He pulled the trigger first, fast. Then he uttered a string of profanities—as sparks flew from his EMD instead of a shot, and the weapon fizzled and crackled with electricity from its short-circuiting. The dinosaur had damaged it on impact, rather than breaking his bones.

“Ground team, come in,” Pruitt spoke on the radio. Alarm shook his voice. “We lost you there for a while, what’s going on down there? Over.”

Too high and far away to understand the gravity and danger of their situation, and too distant to offer them any immediate help, answering Pruitt needed to wait.

And Grant was too high on adrenaline, too driven to survive.

Where Mischchenko missed and Ruiz was prevented from shooting altogether, she shot the flying pterodactyl. Her rifle still only had the output of a cattle prod.

The flying dinosaur therefore flinched. Once, twice, then it screeched in a pitch so high as to pierce the heavens above the wintry Appalachian forest, while completing another circle with another flap of its thundering wings.

“We need backup,” Ruiz spat in response, “Mischchenko needs evac on the double, and Spencer fucking needs to hire more personnel! Over, motherfucker!”

More shots from Grant’s EMD caused the flying creature to circle around with another angry flap of its wings, and it served to draw its ire. Yet another circle, and it screeched again.

She felt that screech, deep down, shaking the marrow in her bones, and curdling her blood.

The pterodactyl was not deterred. Its killer instinct had focused on her.

And the other one on the ground, it flapped its wings again—no longer so stunned, it responded to the flying one’s screech, and spread its wings, preparing to pounce—

Grant ran. She ran to Doctor Solomon’s Anomaly locking device.

She wasn’t thinking clearly, but could imagine no other way. She punched in the three-digit security code, and the device’s locking system shut down.

The nearby basketball-sized floating orb exploded into a big sphere of glittering light. It chimed mysteriously, slowly rotating, inches above the ground… the Anomaly once more connecting two periods in time.

The portal of the Anomaly was once again open.

Worst case scenario, even worse things could now come through. The mutant insect swarm could potentially return. Maybe the ancient warrior covered in blood, with the mutant beast chasing him, would dash through. Maybe a raging wooly mammoth would arrive, or perhaps a hungry T-Rex.

Best case scenario, Grant was going to send these dinosaurs elsewhere.

Elsewhen.

She shot at the pterodactyl in the air, then at the one on the ground, alternating between her EMD’s shots at them both. One, two, three, and a fourth shot to fully anger both “big birds”, drawing their attention towards her.

It worked without fail.

The shadow in the misty sky flew at her with deadly trajectory. The other made two leaping bounds, frozen grounds crunching after every jump. Both screeched in unison as they descended and lunged.

She had already turned. Ran.

Right into the open Anomaly. She dove into the shimmering sphere and tumbled down a sandy hill—

A sandy hill?

What had happened? A minute prior, this side of the Appalachian Anomaly had been a grassy hill near an idyllic beach in an undetermined era.

The crossroads of Anomalies, with dozens over dozens of Anomaly spheres, still hovered all above the ground here, now…

But the environment had changed. A different biome welcomed Grant on this side of the Anomaly.

She had no time to dwell on this new phenomenon. Grant had witnessed such a shift or paradox before—history changing in the blink of an eye—simply by traveling back and forth through another Anomaly. Airlift pilot Sears had entirely ceased to exist the last time it happened, and only she remembered him ever having existed.

In the new here and now, Grant rolled down the sandy dune of a hill, with neither grass nor ocean in sight. Only dust and bleached stone and cracked earth surrounded her in this new Crossroads of Anomalies.

She grunted at the final impact of her rolling descent when she crashed into a boulder and it knocked the wind out of her lungs. Further robbing her breath, a gale swept over her as one pterodactyl flew over her on this side of the Anomaly, its wings spread with frightening majesty. The other stumbled past her, then tumbled down the other side of the dune as it lost its footing after its leap through the Anomaly, emitting a pained screech when it fell with as little grace as Grant had.

The other already began circling, high above the glittering spheres of the manyfold Anomalies here.

Time froze for Grant. The look she took at her environs was short-lived yet rich in detail.

A jagged rock jutted out of the sand near the Anomaly they had crossed through. A chunk of it was broken off, dragged down with the pterodactyl that had tripped over it.

And the trails they both left in the dune’s sands pointed her in the direction of the Anomaly. Her only way back home. The trails would help tremendously in choosing the right way to go.

Time was no longer frozen and she needed to act.

Pain flared up all over her body from her many falls. The pain only centered her and spurred her on, granting her greater speed. She ran for another Anomaly—any would do, really—but she chose one that flagged in its chimes, with a flickering light that faded in and out as its stability waned.

A Flicker.

A deadly stunt to be sure, as it could trap her with the pterodactyls in a time stranded beyond humanity, but it was the only way she saw to keep these two dinosaurs out of her town time.

She charged into the Flicker, not even wasting time to check if the pterodactyls continued their pursuit of her. She gambled on it. Needed to act quickly. That Flicker could close any moment now.

She crossed the flickering, blinding light into another time.

With a pounding heart, and gasping desperately for breath, she barely managed to take in any thorough glimpse of her new environment, this new world.

Its apocalyptic vision would haunt her with nightmares beyond nightmares.

A city of ruins. Empty buildings, missing all windows, surrounded her. The street she stood on was only recognizable as such from the rusted husks of overgrown cars dotting its length.

Everything in this era was blanketed with creeping vines, and lush with abundant green. And utterly devoid of all human life wherever she could see. This was a world, a time after people.

Grant scrambled away from the glowing sphere, and without fail, one pterodactyl flew through the Anomaly, chasing her into this apocalyptic future. Its flight corrected course before it threatened to crash into a crumbling wall, swerving upwards into a dreary gray sky at the last second.

She clambered up half a wall and rolled through a window. Remnants of glass shards cracked and crunched where she landed.

The other pterodactyl followed, now flying again. It screeched—no longer in pain—but with wrath ringing in its piercing tone.

The hunter’s wrath.

Grant ducked behind the wall, staying in cover, knowing very well the first pterodactyl would locate her and pounce if she made one wrong move.

The Flicker flickered. Her heart skipped a beat. The Flicker was about to close, and she needed to dive back out, and run for it, across the overgrown street, underneath the pterodactyls circling above.

Then something howled. A blood-curdling howl, more terrifying than the two pterodactyls’ screeching in its sound.

Grant had heard it before… in the other wasteland past another Anomaly of the Crossroads. In that barren, ghastly wasteland, even more apocalyptic than these city ruins.

She had no intention of finding out what kind of future mutant creature could make such a sound.

The Flicker flickered again. Almost collapsed. The Anomaly was on the verge of closing.

Counting the breaths she suppressed, she waited till a silent number five crossed her mind, then she made her move. No second too soon, as her fear came true, and she witnessed the creature that had howled its horrific howl in these apocalyptic times.

Spindly limbs displayed uncanny strength, supporting a powerful and muscular body. Its every digit ended in deadly claws, piercing the very stone of the wall above her, roosting on the ledge, and capable of leaping down. Everything of this mutant’s body screamed one message clearly: it could and would tear her limb from limb if it caught up to her.

A strange, gray-splotched head with too many unblinking eyes crowned the future mutant’s slender frame, and a maw of jagged teeth, like a sawblade, opened.

Those teeth glistened in the gloom.

Grant glimpsed this future predator only long enough before new hell and chaos broke loose. It leapt—not at her, but at one of the pterodactyls circling above the building’s crumbling wall. It leapt with such staggering force that the two creatures crashed into a wall on the other side of the overgrown street.

And the other pterodactyl screeched in response, high above, kept out of Grant’s sight by the canyon of crumbling, overgrowing city blocks.

The Flicker flickered. The Anomaly’s subtle chimes faded.

She would not stay to witness more, to learn more. In the shadows beyond a broken wall, the future predator flew with feral ferociousness as its claws mangled the pterodactyl’s flailing wings. Blood sprayed everywhere. They screeched and shrieked and howled and thrashed.

Grant fled. She ran towards the Flicker. It flickered and blinded her as she ran through it, back through the Anomaly.

Black spots clouded her vision, but a wave of relief washed over her as her environment had changed. The Flicker flickered, the Anomaly collapsed behind her.

The relief died as the Flicker’s chimes were snuffed out with its vanished light.

She no longer stood in a desert among the Crossroads of Anomalies.

“Fuck!” she yelled into the void of this new world.

Trees swallowed any echo.

No longer grassy hills by an unknown ocean, nor was she standing among a desert’s barren dunes, either.

She stood in a jungle, teeming with life, and glowing with the light of the dozens of Anomalies all around. The Crossroads persisted, but the world had changed again.

Almost drowning out the chiming sounds from the glowing Anomalous spheres, chirping, chittering, and rustling assaulted her senses. Her heart almost leapt from her chest as she dreaded the return of the mutant insect swarm. Though the Flicker had separated her from the future predator and the pterodactyls, all manner of new danger awaited her here, now.

Nearby, another Anomaly flickered, then closed. Her heart skipped another beat, a dreadful reminder that she may become stranded in this everchanging Crossroads.

Certain death, by all her accounts.

There were no trails in the sand to guide her, no jagged rock.

Between the trees of this fresh green hell, she glimpsed no clues as to where to go.

Time froze again. Despair awaited.

Before despair could overwhelm her, a familiar figure stepped through an Anomaly. Though the helmet on his head concealed his face, she recognized his movements, his shape: Valentín Ruiz stood in the jungle, emerging from an Anomaly. He waved to her and shouted.

“Come on!”

She did exactly that.

Grant pushed past dense foliage, nearly tripping here and there, and followed Ruiz through the blinding light. She stumbled back into the Appalachian forest.

No longer were these woods foggy. Fir trees almost glowed in bright sunlight.

“God damn, am I glad you made it!” Ruiz said, EMD rifle in hand. The weapon didn’t look damaged anymore. To Mischchenko, he waved and then shouted, “Quick, lock it down!”

Mischchenko punched in the three-digit security code, and the spiky orb topping Solomon’s device clicked and clacked and reconfigured its form, aligning to seal the Anomaly. The glittering sphere of the chiming Anomaly froze, then collapsed, shrinking back into the basketball-sized orb, floating immobile, several feet off the ground.

The generator chugged, the Anomaly Locking Device hummed, and the other—

This place, this time—it too, had changed.

A sinking feeling brought Grant’s stomach low, and the world started spinning around her with an incoming onslaught of sudden nausea.

More Future Proof agents surrounded them. Unfamiliar figures. Since when did they have so many operatives to field? Dozens of spotlights were set up, other generators hooked up to power this new camp. Silvery tents had been pitched in a matter of time impossible for the short amount of time Grant had been away in the Crossroads to shake the pterodactyls, and dozens of researchers in winter jackets and Future Proof ID cards clipped to their chests now swarmed this camp that had seemingly sprung up out of nowhere.

And Mischchenko’s arm… it wasn’t broken. She had used her broken arm to operate the Anomaly Locking Device, as if the pterodactyl had never broken her arm. Mischchenko extended her now-healed-or-never-before-broken arm—to point at Grant.

“A round of applause for Agent Grant! That was one hell of a stupid move! But a bold one, and I can’t say I ain’t glad it worked out.”

Half a dozen black-armored Future Proof agents lifted their EMD rifles, no longer aiming at Grant and the Anomaly.

Grant didn’t know what to say.

Was the very fabric of time unraveling all around her?

[honeydewmelan]

*distant pterodactyl scream”

pufferfish something important to tell you it's urgent

You, and anyone reading this, have just lost the game. Have a nice day! : 3

OH FUCKING HELL

[lowkeyhighkeysuperduper]

y’all im sorry but I’m never gonna shut up about portwell now, like some of y’all might have to unfollow because it’s portwell all day everyday here

[stormyoceansmain]

things from mr. abel's cameo that made me completely lose it, a not comprehensive list with unnecessary comments:

"look at me while im talking to you" because listen. LISTEN. we been knew they were the healthiest pairing in this show but this is yet another confirmation that they sit down together and TALK. when there's an issue between them they don't just skim over it and let it fester, they address it even if it's not exactly pleasant AND THEY MAKE THINGS WORK. and like.. im pretty sure adam learned all of this from kate but i don't think this is something michael was ever used to do (for many reasons) which means that adam, once again, is [paramore voice] THE ONLY EXCEPTIOOOOOON. excuse me while i cry.

michael apologized to adam. TWICE. while looking like a kicked puppy who knows he did something wrong. the eldest being in the universe after god. the prince and supreme commander of the heavenly host. the fiercest and most powerful warrior of heaven. wrapped around some random dude from minnesota's little finger. [TAKES A DEEP BREATH] [SCREAMS] god this is why i need all the fix-it fics where all the angels come back from the empty, because i NEED raphael and gabriel to see their big stern brother completely besotted with this one human and tease him MERCILESSLY.

the way adam can so easily call michael 'buddy/bud' and scold him.. im FINE. look i know this all sounds very repetitive and im sorry but JESUS CHRIST. WHAT A RELATIONSHIP THEY HAVE.

i don't think i have enough words in my vocabulary to express just how much i ADORE adam. he is so caring and gentle and the time in the cage also made him so understanding and compassionate. like, he was before too, don't get me wrong, but he also had all this anger (completely justified, mind you!!) and of course even now there are some things he will never be able to completely forgive ([coughs] the winchesters) but he is so.. idk, wise, now?? and with michael he is so SO forgiving, like he would have all the reasons to be fucking pissed with michael but instead he is so kind in his scolding and in pointing out what michael did wrong IM LOSING MY GODDAMN MIND OVER THIS.

fast forwarding for a second because it ties to the previews point but michael not wanting to hear adam say he is disappointed.... [HEAD IN MY HANDS] of course. of course michael's nr. 1 fear would be to be a disappointment. he lived his whole existence trying not to disappoint his father, someone who probably punished and diminished him as soon as michael did something he disapproved of. someone who was always cold and distant and didn't care. but adam is there saying 'yes you made a mistake. yes i expected more from you. it doesn't make me love you any less.' and how incredible and new that must be for michael? MAKES ME WANNA CRY FRIENDS.

"I LIKED THAT BODY TOO." DO I NEED TO ADD ANYTHING TO THIS BECAUSE I DON'T THINK I CAN WITHOUT TURNING INTO A SCREAMING PTERODACTYL.

michael getting so excited about mcdonald's of all things.. like it's so funny but also THE MOST PRECIOUS THING. and i love that technically angels only taste molecules when they eat stuff, which means that either michael can taste things through adam or.. idk some molecules taste better than others?? and i can't stop thinking about adam offering michael different food to eat because there MUST be something he can taste and michael doesn't see the point because he doesn't NEED to eat and adam explains it's about enjoying things and michael eventually relents (because OF COURSE HE DOES, but he tries stuff ONLY if adam feeds him directly with his fork or his hand) and so the list of things michael enjoys about humanity expands to 1) adam 2) mcdonald's

[cool-i-m-dead-inside]

Don’t be concerned if you hear distant pterodactyl screaming. That’s just me losing my marbles over the new Black Widow footage

[all-that-civilization]

This is absolutely gorgeous. ❤️❤️❤️

A drawing commission!

for @roads-to-rhodes and @all-that-civilization

Their original characters in Red Dead Online

[mythicallore]

Cryptids Proven to be Real Give Us Hope for These 5 Others

Cryptid Monsters Proven Real

Cryptid monsters are known to terrorize and typically reported by a significant portion of a population, or at least a large enough group to confirm that it is indeed an anomalous creature. In earlier years, these animals were brutes fought by hunters and fishermen on outings, and were exaggerated to prove their machismo upon returning home. But eventually these tales became backed by hard evidence, and today we know them well.

The Giant Squid

19th century Scandinavian whalers spoke of the Kraken; an enormous squid whose appendages were found in the bellies of whales and said to be as thick as a ship mast. Fishermen continued to report attacks by these tentacled monstrosities, to the disbelief of landlubbers back home. But eventually they returned with specimens, or found their carcasses washed ashore.

In 1853, a large squid with a horny beak and large throat washed aground in Denmark, baffling local scientists. Johan Japetus Steenstrup, a professor of zoology from the University of Copenhagen, identified the creature as a giant squid.

Today, the giant squid is a scientifically accepted animal, reaching lengths up to 40 feet long. Their enormity is attributed to something called deep-sea gigantism; a tendency for deep sea invertebrates to be larger than their shallow-water relatives. But the giant squid isn’t even the biggest mollusk of its kind, that title is reserved for the colossal squid, which reaches up to 46 feet in length.

The Platypus

The platypus is a rather bizarre looking creature and if you attempted to explain it to someone before its discovery, they’d almost certainly believe you were mad. So, it’s an egg-laying mammal with the bill of a duck, the tail of a beaver, the webbed-feet of an otter, and the venom of a snake? Sure.

But now the platypus is a well-known creature, lending credence to the possibility of other cryptids that seem to be an amalgam of disparate species. When it was first presented to British zoologist George Shaw, he attempted to rip off its beak, believing it had been glued on. Eventually, he took scissors to the deceased animal, before he realized it was genuine. That particular specimen can be found to this day in a British museum.

The Frilled Shark

Sea serpents have stoked the fears of sea-farers for centuries, tormenting sailors and swallowing ships whole. From Texas to Norway, reports of sea serpents sprang up in local and national publications during the 19th century, depicted as gargantuan snakes devouring unwitting mariners while they innocently roamed the sea.

Today, the frilled shark could be considered the closest animal to these horrific serpent tales, appearing much like those descriptions written in antiquity, though comparatively smaller. The frilled shark was discovered in the late 1800s by German ichthyologist Ludwig H.P. Döderlein, and later described by Samuel Garman as, “such an animal as that described is very likely to unsettle disbelief in what is popularly called the ‘sea serpent.’”

So, it’s a shark, but a frightening one at that, with 25 clusters of 300 sharp, serrated teeth, the Chlamydoselachus africana is one of those relics from the days when dinosaurs ruled the Earth. It’s also one of those deep-sea dwellers, which is part of the reason they are so rarely seen.

Cryptid Creatures With Real Potential

The Jersey Devil

The Jersey Devil, a.k.a. the Leeds Devil, is one of the more popular cryptids of modernity, appearing to thousands of residents, since its first official recording throughout several New Jersey towns in 1909. Scores of people in Trenton, Woodbury and Swedesboro reported a giant winged creature flying through the night, emanating a horrible scream. But as it turns out, Native American tribes in the area had been seeing the Jersey Devil centuries before.

One of the old wives’ tales of the devil comes from a woman named Mother Leeds, who became pregnant with an unwanted 13thchild, whom she cursed. The child was born normally, but then became a horrendous monster. To this day, it resides in the Pine Barren forests, over a million acres of land preserved on the state’s coast.

Described as a cross between a bat and a horse with a long spaded tail, the Jersey Devil has terrified residents of the state, who claim to have found maimed animals and other birds after hearing its cry. Some have written it off as a large bird of prey or a certain type of crane, but others say it is a surviving Pteranodon, a pterodactyl from the Cretaceous period.

Enter the hammerhead bat, a.k.a. the Big-Lipped Bat. The hammerhead bat falls into the megabat category which are exactly what you think they are – massive bats. Hammerhead bats can be found in mangroves, swamps, and forests at lower elevations, usually in Africa. Could the Jersey Devil be an invasive, or transported, Hammerhead bat population that established a home for itself in the Garden State? Ok, so it’s not a new species, but it would validate thousands of local residents’ sightings.

The Orang Pendek

Sumatra’s apeman cryptid, the Orang Pendek is thought to possibly be distant human relative known as Homo floresiensis, sometimes referred to as the real-life hobbit.

In the Indonesian language, Orang Pendek translates to “short person,” and it is believed to be an undiscovered primate species, that could potentially be of the genus Homo. Over the years there have been a number of Orang Pendek sightings by travelers, locals, and researchers who have come in search of the cryptid or stumbled upon it by chance.

The most common characteristics confirmed by these numerous sightings depict the Orang Pendek standing between 30 and 60 inches in height, or about 2½ to 5 feet tall. These cryptids are described as being covered in golden, brown, or grey hair and are bipedal, walking erect in the same manner as humans. But what’s even more bizarre is that they are said to have human-like facial features, differing noticeably in appearance from monkeys.

The Megalodon

Not just because they’ve recently made a Hollywood sci-fi horror about it, but the chance that a Meg could exist might be better than other cryptids who call the ocean their home. First off, the Megalodon actually existed as recently as 2.6 million years ago during the Early Micoene period, to the end of the Pliocene. It was essentially like a Great White Shark, but two to three times larger. It wouldn’t be too hard to imagine a surviving species of shark with deep-sea gigantism twice the size of a Great White. In fact there are other sharks that live at significant depths, including the Goblin Shark and the aforementioned Frilled Shark.

Bigfoot

Almost every culture has its version of Bigfoot; in North America it’s Sasquatch, the Chinese have the Yeren, in Nepal it’s the Yeti, in Australia it’s the Yowie, and in just about every other region of the world you can find a regional ape-like cryptid.

So where is the hard photo and video evidence? There isn’t really a good answer to that question, as Bigfoot is probably the most elusive cryptid there is. But why would so many disparate cultures describe the same type of creature over the course of centuries?

One could say that we have a predilection to create archetypes of mythical creatures that resemble versions of ourselves. There are also a number of other primate species that inhabit the world’s jungles, including one discovered just last year. Is it so hard to believe that a more sentient humanoid branched off from the many other ancestors Homo sapiens diverged from, like an evolved, surviving ancestor of Gigantopithecus?

Bigfoot is by far the most popular cryptid while also the most divisive, so we’ll leave it to you to decide. Are you a believer?

[shmosnet2]

Top 10 Mysterious Monsters Around The World

Top 10 Mysterious Monsters Around The World

From the far off snowy mountains of Tibet to the grey and gloomy lochs of Scotland, many different cultures from around the world have reported seeing strange creatures that science just can’t explain. Although evidence is typically scarce and mostly based on hearsay, many hold on to the hope that some of the following mysterious creatures really do exist. 10. The Ropen Papua New Guinea, renowned for its unexplored forests and undiscovered species of both flora and fauna, is home to this mysterious monster. Stories arose from the Umboi Island of a featherless, giant flying creature with a long tail that ends in a flange and a diamond shaped head. Known to the locals as Indava, the Ropen is believed to be a nocturnal Pterosaur, very similar to a Pterodactyl, that glows against the night sky when it flies. The Ropen has become the flying hobby horse of creationists who seek to find living dinosaurs as proof that the earth is far younger than evolutionary scientists would have you believe. Five expeditions between 1994 and 2004 were conducted by said creationists, resulting in only three sightings – but even those were distant, brief views of what has been dubbed the “ropen light”. According to recent investigators over 90% of the sightings on Umboi Island are of this featureless, bright white light. Jonathan Whitcomb went on to write the book ‘Searching for Ropens’ which suggests that most sightings were of one giant creature which sleeps in the island interior during the day and at night it feeds by the reef. The locals interviewed reported that the bright glow of the Ropen lasts for anywhere up to five or six seconds. Even with all this knowledge, no real hard evidence has ever been found. The locals continue to tell stories of the glowing bird and maybe one day scientists will be seeing the same light. 9. The Bunyip

The Bunyip, or kianpraty, is a large mythical creature from Aboriginal mythology which is said to lurk in swamps, billabongs, creeks, riverbeds and waterholes. The word bunyip is usually translated by Aboriginal Australians today as “devil” or “evil spirit”. Aboriginal stories tell of a creature about 11 paces long and 4 paces in breadth. Most people who witness the monster claim to have been in such dread that they were unable to take note of its characteristics, but those that did told of a dog-like face, a crocodile like head, dark fur, a horse-like tail, flippers and walrus-like tusks or horns. Such a creature has never been recorded by European colonists but there has been multiple sightings of mysterious evidence to support such claims. The first sighting of such evidence was by Hamilton Hume and James Meehan in 1818 when they found some large bones of what looked like a hippopotamus or manatee at Lake Bathurst in New South Wales. After this, reports of more fossils came in of “some quadruped much larger than an ox or buffalo” and in 1847 a display at the Australian Museum, Sydney claimed to exhibit a Bunyip skull. Although no real sightings have been documented, the natives still tell stories of the beast screams which can be heard at night. 8. The Dover Demon

Seventeen year old William Bartlett claimed that while driving on April 21, 1977 he saw a large-eyed creature “with tendril-like fingers” and glowing eyes on top of a broken stone wall on Farm Street in Dover, Massachusetts. This was the start of the Dover Demon. Though it was only sighted by a few people in a short period of time, it is considered one of the most mysterious creatures of modern times. The second sighting came just 2 hours after the first when John Baxter swore that he saw the same creature while walking home from his girlfriend’s house. The 15-year-old boy saw it with its arms wrapped around the trunk of a tree, and his description of the thing matched Bartlett’s exactly. The final sighting was reported the next day by 15-year-old Abby Brabham who said it appeared briefly in the car’s headlights while she and her friend were driving. Again, the description was consistent with that of Bartlett. Each claimed they saw a four foot tall, hairless creature with rough-textured skin, long spindly peach-coloured limbs and large glowing orange eyes upon a large watermelon-shaped head which was nearly as big as its body. Though investigations into this unusual case turned up no hard evidence for the reality of the creature, there was also no evidence of a hoax nor a motive for perpetrating one. So was the Dover Demon just a story these kids made up, or is it still out there waiting for the right moment to strike? 7. Mongolian Death Worm

painting: Pieter Dirkx In August 2009, two New Zealanders carrying a video camera and a sack of explosives set off to a remote southern corner of Mongolia’s Gobi desert in search of a creature that few believe exist. The Mongolian Death Worm is known locally as the Allghoi Khorkhoi, or the “intestine worm,” because it is believed to resemble the internal tract of a cow. The Kiwi duo intend to lure the monster to the surface with tremors set off by detonating their explosives. Once emerged, they planned to capture it on film. Unfortunately the men came up empty handed like many expeditions before them. The worm is subject of a number of claims by Mongolian locals and according to legend it is described as bright red with a wide body that is 2 to 5 feet (0.6 to 1.5 m) long. It lurks beneath the sand of the desert, pouncing on unsuspecting victims with such abilities as spewing acid (which on contact will corrode anything it touches) and being able to kill at a distance with electric discharge. The Mongolians also believe that touching any part of the worm will cause instant death or tremendous pain. It has been told that the worm frequently preyed on camels and laid eggs in its intestines, eventually acquiring the trait of its red-like skin. They say that the worm lives underground, hibernating most of the year except for when it becomes active in June and July. It is reported that this animal is mostly seen on the surface when it rains and the ground is wet. All in all just another reason to stay out of the desert. 6. The Spring-Heeled Jack

During the 19th Century, inhabitants of London became victim to this curious beast. In October 1837 the first sighting of The Spring-Heeled Jack was reported, appearing out of the shadows of night and attacking his victims with dreadful scratches before bounding away with superhuman ability. The first sighting was reported by Mary Stevens when she was walking to work after visiting her parents. A strange figure leapt at her from a dark alley. After immobilising her with a tight grip of his arms, he began to kiss her face while ripping her clothes and touching her flesh with his claws which were, according to her deposition, “cold and clammy as those of a corpse”. In panic, the girl screamed, making the attacker quickly flee from the scene. The commotion brought several residents who immediately launched a search for the aggressor, who could not be found. Polly Adams, a pub worker, was another of three women accosted by Spring-Heeled Jack in September of that year. He allegedly tore her blouse off and scratched at her stomach with iron-like fingernails or claws. Several witnesses claimed to have seen Jack escape the scene of the crime by jumping over a 9 ft (2.7 m) high wall while babbling with a high-pitched, ringing laughter. Through numerous accounts they were able to get a description of the monster which included a man-like hideous face, sharp iron-like claws and glowing eyes all beneath a black cloak. Spring-Heeled Jack is one of the most baffling tales to come out of Victorian England. 5. Giant Anaconda https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fo0z3Dyd1J0 The vast, teeming Amazon rain forest can kill you in all sorts of ways, from encounters with ravenous piranhas to suspicious native tribes. But the most lethal terror reported to be lurking in these parts is the giant anaconda; a lightning-quick snake more than 30 ft. (9 m) long which is capable of capsizing and crushing wooden boats floating down the Amazon. Reports of giant anacondas date back as far as the European colonization of South America when sightings of snakes upwards of 50 metres (164 feet) began to circulate amongst colonists. The topic has been a subject of debate among cryptozoologists and zoologists ever since. Scientists believe that such a monstrous version of the anaconda, which in real life rarely grows beyond an already scary 17 ft. (about 5 m), no longer exists. In 2009, the discovery of Titanoboa fossils found in South America revealed that snakes in the past did in fact reach sizes of over 40ft. The Wildlife Conservation Society has, since the early 20th century, offered a large cash reward (currently $50,000) for live delivery of any snake of 9 metres (29.5 ft) or more in length, but the prize has never been claimed – despite numerous sightings of giant anacondas. Regular size snakes are enough to set anyone’s nerves on edge, but something this big is the stuff of nightmares. 4. The El Chupacabra

This impish monster – whose name means “goat sucker” in Spanish – allegedly looks like a giant rodent with palsy. A kind of half-reptile, half-kangaroo mutant. It first drew the world’s attention in 1995 when residents of the Puerto Rican town of Canovanas claimed that chupacabras were behind a spate of attacks that killed more than 150 of their livestock, each drained of its blood. Similar killings were report in Moca a few months later. Sightings have since been reported as far north as Maine and as far south as Chile. They have even been spotted outside the Americas in countries like Russia and The Philippines. The most common description of the chupacabra is that of a reptile-like creature said to have leathery or scaly greenish-grey skin and sharp spines or quills running down its back. It is said to be approximately 3 to 4 feet (1 to 1.2 m) high, and stands and hops in a fashion similar to that of a kangaroo. Some reports have even stated chupacabras were winged like gargoyles and blinked glowing-red eyes in the dark, heightening the sense of supernatural menace surrounding the creatures. 3. The Yeti

illustration: Philippe Semeria This beast is said to be found deep in the Himalayan regions of Nepal and Tibet. The Yeti, or Abominable Snowman, was first reported in 1832 by James Prinsep, one of colonial India’s most venerable scholars. He kept an account of his trip through Nepal where he reportedly saw a tall, hairy, bipedal creature that fled upon being detected. Since then many mountaineers, including Everest conquerors Sir Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay, reported footprints far larger than human feet dotting snowy trails. A 1954 expedition commissioned by the British Daily Mail retrieved dark brown hairs from a supposed yeti scalp kept in a secluded Buddhist monastery. It is believed that the Yeti was a part of the pre-Buddhist beliefs of several Himalayan people; the Lepcha people are said to have worshipped a “Glacier Being” as a God of the Hunt. A photographer and member of the Royal Geographical Society, N.A Tombazi wrote that he saw a creature at about 15,000 ft for about a minute, “Unquestionably, the figure in outline was exactly like a human being, walking upright and stopping occasionally to pull at some dwarf rhododendron bushes. It showed up dark against the snow, and as far as I could make out, wore no clothes.” Two hours later Tombazi and his companions descended and reported seeing the creature’s large footprints in the snow. One of the most renowned mysterious monsters, the yeti seems to be a docile creature with no reported attacks. One can only hope it stays this way. 2. Bigfoot

Bigfoot (also known as Sasquatch) is the name given to a cryptid ape or hominid-like creature that is said to inhabit forests in the Pacific Northwest region of North America. Indigenous folklore of the Pacific Northwest told of cannibalistic hairy men and giants who roamed the great forests and mountains of the region, abducting children in the dead of night and sabotaging the salmon-catching nets of local fishermen. In 1951, Eric Shipton photographed what he described as a Bigfoot’s footprint – named so because of its size (24 inches long and 8 inches wide). This generated considerable attention and led to the story of the creature entering popular consciousness. The craze went into overdrive in 1967 when two Californians screened a short documentary of footage that allegedly filmed the Yeti’s cousin and, in 2001, the first still picture was captured using an automatically triggered camera attached to a tree. Many tried to pass the images off as “a bear with a severe case of mange”. In 2008, two men claimed they had uncovered the body of a Sasquatch. Most of major US news networks sought images of the beast’s corpse – only to find that its head was hollow and its feet were made of rubber. Still, a cult following of researchers have dedicated their life to proving that this monster does exist. 1. The Loch Ness Monster Reports of a large, long-necked serpent loping around the waterways of the Scottish highlands date back as far as the 7th century, but modern interest in the monster was sparked by a sighting on 22 July 1933. George Spicer and his wife claimed to have saw “a most extraordinary form of animal” cross the road in front of their car. They described the creature as having a large body about 1.2 metres high and 7.6 metres long. It also had a long narrow neck slightly thicker than an elephant’s trunk and as long as the 3-4 m width of the road. It lurched across the road towards the loch, leaving only a trail of broken undergrowth in its wake. In August 1933, a motorcyclist named Arthur Grant claimed to have nearly hit the creature on the north-eastern shore. Grant claimed that he saw a small head attached to a long neck and that the creature saw him and crossed the road back into the loch. He dismounted and followed it but only saw ripples. Sightings of the monster increased following the building of a road along the loch in early 1933, bringing both workmen and tourists to the formerly isolated area. In the past century, dozens of scientists have conducted sonar scans and plunged inside submersibles into the lake’s depths, sometimes picking up tantalizing, albeit inconclusive, readings of some mysterious, unusually sized object. However, a 2003 study commissioned by the BBC employed satellite tracking and took sonar readings from around 600 different locations in the lake and yielded nothing. Despite all this, the legend of ‘Nessie’ lives on.

https://ift.tt/2ObWAuq . Foreign Articles November 23, 2019 at 06:43PM

[pheuthe]

Mick + Ray, 26?

(Thank you for this lovely prompt, I really enjoyed writing this one even though it got away from me a bit :D so here you go, atomwave + “I didn’t intend to kiss you.” :))

eighteenth time is the charm

(AO3)

“Are yousure this is the only way, Haircut?”

“Yes,” Raysighs, for what feels like the tenth time. Mick grumbles somethingunintelligible, but still follows Ray down what used to be Santa MonicaBoulevard, through the heaps of rubble and pterodactyl droppings. That’s whatRay has come to value about Mick, actually: the way he will complain, oftenwith his fists, but when shit hits the fan – or when there’s a bomb that needsto be disabled – he’s always right there.

And maybeMick having his back in all the worst situations is messing with Ray’s head,but this is neither the time nor the place to think about it. In fact, Ray hasyet to find the right time and place: not that he’s trying too hard. It’s justso much easier to ignore the warm, fuzzy feeling in the pit of his stomachwhenever Mick unexpectedly does something selfless while still frowning aboutit, grumbling like he’s not one of the kindest, bravest people Ray has ever-

“Guys, it’snot the one in Pacific Park, you’ve already tried that one,” Sara says throughthe comm, tearing Ray out of thoughts. He’s secretly grateful for thedistraction; he’s getting steadily worse at ignoring those intrusive thoughts.

Ray bringsup the map of Los Angeles onto the suit’s visor: it’s only moderately accurate,considering that it doesn’t account for several timelines overlapping with eachother, but for their purpose, it will have to do.

“What aboutthe UCLA?”

There arevoices in the background, probably another of their teammates consulting theplans Ray prepared for this mission. A distant roar echoes somewhere nearby, nomore than a few blocks away, just as Sara’s voice returns. “Yeah, that’s stillin the running. You’re about two miles out.”

“Can wefly?” Ray asks, and ignores the way Mick growls in the back of his throat. Therumbling sound sends shivers down Ray’s spine, and there’s definitely no timefor that. In moments like these, Ray really misses the times when he wasn’t soincredibly aware of everything Mick says or does. Ignorance really is bliss.

“You’regood to go up until Westwood, there seems to be a nest of… something unfriendly on the Oppenheimer Tower.”

“Got it,”Ray nods and turns to Mick – who is looking at him like a very angry cat. Ray’sgot experience with angry cats. For some reason, the animals react to him inthe same way his body does to their fur: with violent refusal. But he’s alsogot experience with Mick, and heknows that he won’t actually bepunched in the face when he steps towards the other man and smiles.

“Hold on.And be careful around the jets, okay?”

“I know,”Mick scowls but wraps his arms around Ray’s shoulders, looking pissed. Ray restshis palm against the small of Mick’s back to stabilize the suit’s flight withthe extra weight (at least that’s what Ray tells himself, rather feebly).

It turnsout that rerouting around the National Cemetery is not as much of a good ideaas Ray believed, but they don’t realize that until they see the twenty-feettripods shooting lasers at each other among the graves.

“Very Warof the Worlds,” Mick grunts, close to Ray’s ear. Ray shivers, and wishes theyhad the time to address Mick’s knowledge of that particular work.

Then theyget shot down, or rather, some kind of a charge goes off when one of thetripods explodes, and there’s an emergency landing that Ray thinks could’vegone smoother. Twenty minutes later they’ve managed to shake the machinesrunning after them on spindly, creaky legs, and Ray’s breathing hard as heleans against the dusty wall of a half-collapsed palace that most definitely doesn’t belong in WestwoodVillage.

“If that’s the future, then I’m suddenly alot less excited about time travel,” he groans, pushing his visor up to swipeat the sweat dripping down his brow.

Mick, rightnext to him, leans out of their hiding spot and fires his gun, then grins atRay with that manic light in his eyes that Ray has (unfortunately) come toappreciate.

“I don’tknow, they burn pretty fucking well.”

And ofcourse Mick would be okay with anything that can be torched. Ray lets out aweak laugh and grabs the man’s arm.

“Let’s go.”

UCLA is awhole another can of worms – literally,seeing as there are a few hundred rotting bison corpses lining the streets allaround the campus. Ray gags and covers his nose with his hand, but it doesn’treally help. Mick fires at the nearest corpse and scowls:

“If this isart, I don’t get it.”

Ray wantsto laugh, but that would make him inhale more of the rot, so he just drags Mickinto the School of Engineering, which has somehow acquired a very golden, verystrange clock tower.

And a bomb.That’s the worst part, really.

It doesn’ttake that long to locate the gadget. The timer is counting down, three minutesand fifteen seconds, fourteen, thirteen, and Ray bites the inside of his cheek,stomach squeezing with anxiety at how tight their schedule is. The tripods werereally an unexpected detour… and while technically, they can travel back intime and try again, Gideon has warned them against doing it, their plan alreadyincluding way too much time-travel for the AI’s peace of mind.

Two minutesand fifty-nine seconds, and Mick’s gloved hand closes around Ray’s wrist. Hecan barely feel the touch through his gauntlet, no more than a ghost of afeeling where Mick’s thumb presses into the soft spot against Ray’s wrist, butit’s enough to tear him out of his reverie. He glances at the other man, andsomething in Mick’s eyes flips Ray’s stomach, in the best (and worst,considering their situation) way possible.

“You can doit, Haircut.”

Adrenalinefloods Ray’s system and he nods back, stepping towards the bomb and hoping forthe best. There are two more like it in the city – well, one, considering whatSara said about them having tried the Pacific Park. Fifteen more across thecountry, and only disabling the right one will actually prevent the explosionfrom happening.

Ray has noidea how many they’ve tried before. How many Rays and Micks have been blown uptogether with the rest of the continent while their team blinked out of thatparticular timeline only to retrieve them from an earlier time, so that theycould try again, with a different bomb. Ray tries not to think about hisfeelings on the matter of dying so many times, but… it’s not like he’llremember it, right? And maybe, just maybe, this time they’ll hit the jackpot andthis will be the correct one.

He fusseswith the wires while Mick, unsurprisingly, produces a chocolate bar from somewhere and starts chewing loudly. Itmakes Ray chuckle, which in turn makes him relax a little and focus on his taskbetter. Mick has that effect on him: which should be strange, because mostpeople get really nervous around Mick, not the opposite. Ray’s used to it now,to the unique way they just fit, liketwo pieces of a puzzle. Or like pieces of two different puzzles which were cutout by the same machine, the pictures looking different at first sight but theshapes still matching…? Ray gets lost in his metaphor halfway through, butthen, the build of the bomb suddenly clicks in his brain and he cuts the rightcord, giving Mick a triumphant grin.

The bombstops the countdown at one minute, ten seconds, and Ray lets out a loud breath.

Mick tossesthe candy wrapper to the floor and pushes himself off the table where he’s beensitting, within Ray’s reach.

“Guys?”Sara’s voice sounds worried. “It didn’t work. We’ve got eyes on the PacificPark bomb and it’s still ticking.”

Ray’sinsides turn to lead. He knows what this means – that the team has less than aminute to get out of this particular timeline, return a couple of hours back,and collect the Mick and Ray who have not yet fought off weird futuristictripods or waded through a field of dead animals.

Raysincerely hopes that the past Mick and Ray will have more luck next time.

Heswallows, throat dry to the point of pain and hands shaking, and it filtersthrough his suddenly foggy brain that there’s going to be a Raymond Palmer safeand sound in the future, but it’s not going to be him.

He’s gotjust a few seconds to live, a little more than half a minute, tops. They’reboth going to die, and Ray remembers devising the plan with this exact momentin mind. He’s willing to do it, just as he was willing with the Oculus… but it’shard to fool the survival instinct screaming at him to grab Mick and run, as ifit would do any good with a bomb of this magnitude.

“You reallyshouldn’t have gone with me,” he says quietly, voice thick with the fear hetries not to feel.

Mick’sfingers, bare and scarred, twine with Ray’s own.

“Not like Icoulda let you take all the credit, Haircut.”

And Mick’sgrumbling again, but he’s right there with Ray, about to die who knows how manytimes, but he’s there and Ray’s heartis suddenly filled to the brim and he can’t, can’t die regretting that he never told Mick just how much he meansto Ray.

“Fifteenseconds, guys, we’re out,” Sara’s voice drifts like a distant echo through theearpiece, but Ray doesn’t have time for words, hers or his own. He tosses hishelmet off – it’s not going to protect him now, anyway – and steps right intoMick’s personal space, ignoring the look of dawning apprehension or worry orconfusion, whatever it is, they’ve got no time for that.

Ten secondsnow, or less, and Ray leans into Mick, into that solid warmth that he neverwould’ve expected the first time he laid eyes on the pyro. But Mick is so muchmore than that, so much more than just a goon or a thief or a criminal, morethan Chronos and more than a friend, darn, so much more.

Sevenseconds, and Mick’s sharp inhale cuts through the ominous silence in the room

Six, andhis eyes drift closed, like he trusts Ray, like maybe, he wants this to happen, and Ray’s heart nearly bursts at the thoughtthat he could’ve done this sooner, could’ve felt this terrified and excited andhappy for days, maybe weeks.

Five, andRay closes the distance; four, and their lips meet, Mick’s hands slipping into thesweaty strands of hair at the nape of Ray’s neck. It’s painfully perfect andRay wants to cry, but he can hold it back for the few seconds they still have.

He doesn’tbother coming up for air before the blinding light and the heat of theexplosion swallow them up.

……

“Mick,wait!” Ray calls, stumbling over the debris on the road as he does his best torun after the other man.

Who’smoving surprisingly fast, considering there’s still a broken arrow shaft stuckin his thigh. Ray might be reevaluating his opinion on the dream-come-true ofmeeting – and fighting – actual Cossacks.

“Wait!” heyells again, but Mick isn’t listening, doing his very best to get away from Rayas quickly as possible. Or at least it seems that way, and Ray’s heart is aheap of misery at this point. He didn’t want things to turn out this way, butin his defense…

“I didn’t intend to kiss you, okay?! I’m sorry! Itwas a spur of the moment thing, you know, the moment I thought we had like, tenseconds to live? Mick, talk to-“

He roundsthe corner behind which Mick disappeared and stops short, eyes widening as hespots the whole Waverider crew, allof them, not ten feet away and grinning like a bunch of cats who got a poolfull of cream all to themselves.

“Oh,” Raysighs and rubs at the back of his neck, feeling his cheeks heat up. Mick isscowling, but it’s hard to tell whether he hates Ray or the rest of them moreat the moment.

“You know,”Jax smirks, “it would be much easier to believe that you didn’t intend to do it if you haven’t done it…what, eight times?”

“Ten,” Saracorrects, with an expression that reminds Ray of Leonard Snart.

“What,”Mick snarls, and it’s not even a question, just a demand for explanation. Heshoots Ray a suspicious glare, and Ray’s insides wither like a flower in amicrowave. He wants to ask whether it was really that awful – because for the coupleof seconds they were kissing, Mick actually seemed… not wholly against theidea. Until Sara’s voice came to them through their comms, amusement tintingher words as she announced that she had just been messing with them and theyhave, in fact, disabled the bomb this time and wouldn’t really die.

It’s acruel joke if Ray ever saw one, but he has to admit that he would maybe laugh, out of sheer relief ifnothing else, if only Mick didn’t hightail it out of that room like his buttwas on fire.

No, wait,scratch that, the man might actually enjoythat.

“What?” Rayechoes, albeit weaker. Sara steps forward and wraps her arm around hisshoulders – even the easy, friendly gesture feels like teasing.

“Yeah. Tentimes out of eighteen, you kissed him right before the bomb went off.”

Ray gapes,unable to make a single sound. A part of his brain not completely caught up inthe horror of half-molesting his teammate registers the number eighteen andthinks ‘of course it had to be the verylast one that worked’, but a much bigger part of his mind is trapped in thedawning realization that he won’t get off the hook that easily.

If you dosomething ten times, even if technically, it’s always a different instance of you, it’s much harder to play it off asa ‘spur of the moment’, huh.

Mick growlsunder his breath; Ray really admires Amaya’s bravery for stepping close totheir resident pyro.

“You’ve gotno grounds for that grimace you’re making,” she says, pointing a finger rightin Mick’s face. “The other eight times it was you.”

The changethat washes over Mick’s features is breathtaking: rage transforms intoconfusion and gives way to an expression that Ray would dub ‘deer in theheadlights’. Mick looks a little trapped, and a part of Ray wants to step upand help… but he can’t bring himself to sweep this off the table when he’slearning that maybe Mick could- no, Mick definitely does-

That’s whenMick’s knee goes out from under him and Ray lurches forward to catch him beforehe hits the pavement. Mick’s not looking at him at all, but he does allow Ray to wrap a steadying arm around hiswaist, holding on to Ray’s shoulder in turn.

“Let’s getthat arrow out,” Ray sighs; there’s nothing he can do if Mick doesn’t want totalk about it. Yes, feelings are definitely involved, for both of them… but Raycan’t force Mick to talk about it if he doesn’t want to. And Ray’s learned inthe thirty-seven years of his life that feelings don’t always equal a happyending… perhaps he was naïve to hope that with Mick, things could turn out wellfor once.

The rest ofthe team trail into the Waverider after them, but Ray hardly registers theirpresence. The way to the medbay is one huge awkward moment, the tense silenceinterspersed with Mick’s pained grunts. He still refuses to meet Ray’s eyes andit feels a bit like he’s withdrawing into himself, leaving Ray on the outside… butthat’s okay for the time being, since Ray is doing his best to collect histhoughts anyway.

He sticksaround while Gideon heals Mick’s thigh, and tries not to cast odd looks at Mick’snaked skin. Come to think of it, he can’t remember seeing Mick without pantsbefore, and he flushes when his eyes wander up the surprisingly smooth thigh tothe simple (red) boxer briefs. Ray averts his eyes as quickly as humanlypossible: Mick didn’t react too well to the kiss, whether or not he might’veinstigated a few himself, so Ray’s pretty sure he wouldn’t like to be ogled,either.

Finally,Gideon declares Mick ‘good as new’ and Ray hears the shuffling noises of theother man sliding off the seat and reaching for his bloodied pants. The sightof him, standing in the cold medbay in a long-sleeved shirt, boxers and socks,scowling at the torn jeans in his hand and looking lost, breaks Ray’s heart alittle and he pushes himself away from the wall:

“I’ll getyou new ones, just wait here, okay?”

He’shalfway out the door when Mick’s quiet voice stops him.

“Wait.”

Ray turns,and Mick isn’t hypnotizing the floor anymore: he’s looking right back, andthere’s a kind of vulnerability in his eyes that Ray’s afraid to analyze toohard, for fear of it slipping away.

Andsuddenly, he’s chuckling and walking closer, the feeling of being forced outbehind Mick’s personal barriers gone.

“Who would’vethought we’d have to die eighteen times to get to this point, huh?” he jokes,and a shadow flickers over Mick’s expression. Before Ray can apologize –because what an awful joke to make to someone who lost his best friend twice injust a couple of months – Mick is reaching out and tangling his fingers intothe belt of Ray’s suit, pulling him closer.

“Justseventeen,” he huffs, his face suddenly awfully close. Ray swallows, his brain shuttingdown as Mick crosses the distance, lips almost brushing Ray’s. “And I’ve got ascore to even out, Haircut.”

It’s notthe most romantic declaration of intent that Ray could imagine, but when Mickbites at his bottom lip, he can’t find it in himself to complain.

[zwiiicnziiix]

Depends.

Getting home from work/school:

Me: WHERE??? are my Babies?!?!?

*distant sound of running small feet*

Passing by room:

Brother: *gollum style ragged breathing*

Me: *vague pterodactyl screeching*

Sister: what the fuck are u guys doing

Coming downstairs:

Me: suh

Brother: suh

Sister (screaming): SUH DUDE

If its past 6pm

All at each other, in creepy breathy voices: BUENOS NOCHESSSSSSSSSSS YESSSSS

I’m right and I should say it

[harlockauxillia30k-blog]

Old junk part 1

This is not in character at all and never will be. Think of it as an AU where Harlock joined the military and was raised to be a simpering coward: Also his name was Alexander Voth. You can see how I basically scrapped this guy entirely.

Alexander Voth- Captain of the [at this point the centauri hadn’t even been thought up yet]

Voth considers himself a proud honourable member of the imperial army. Unfortunately, over the intervening years of crusade, reality has reared its ugly head and turned that proud image around somewhat. Somewhat of an excitable man, eager to fall to rear lines and incredibly self conscious, most of his men have little respect for their commanding officer. In combat, they often find his orders somewhat superfluous and distant, as they are often relayed from some kind of bunker or vehicle far in the rear, safe and secure- nothing like the hero-colonel who leads the group as a whole; a man who has shown nothing but contempt for Voth’s apparent weakness.

That all changed during the battle of Sabrok, mere months before the war that would rend the imperium asunder; the heresy…

Voth flexed his shoulders somewhat awkwardly, hoping doing so would mask a shiver creeping through his spine. His warriors were succumbing to the foe; a green monstrous alien breed known to the Imperials as the ‘Ork’- an unthinkable thing to the once cloistered captain. Now, he watched as teams of big green monstrosities began carving through his front ranks. He thought he actually saw Trooper Saul get eaten by one. Alive.

His hands wandering to a misplaced plasma pistol, Voth decided there to take a life changing action; one that would save his career. “W-well, gentlemen, it seems were on the verge of being ov-ove-overrun. N-now, don’t worry. I sh-s-shall lead the rear-guard action and keep the green ones at bay. I um, I want you two lieutenants to marshall the platoons and get them to s-safety. “I’m going now. D-don’t bother stopping me!”

The lieutenants nodded curtly, and walked out of the bunker, organizing their platoons for a retreat.

Voth was left alone in his command bunker. Above, a shell detonated and cracked open the ‘crete. Voth drew his blade.

“Oh gakk it. Oh feth I thought they’d stop me. W-well, hm…”

He walked out of his bunker and into the trench, glancing at his surprised and desperate men.

“Ahem, m-men of the emperor! Have no fear! Victory for us is inevitable. Look upon the standard…” Voth watched as an ork gleefully set the standard alight, much incensing the bearer, who began stabbing the beast with psychotic rage.

“T-then look to me then. Gakk it all!”

Voth pushed himself forward and into the collapsed remains of the frontline; exhausted troopers somehow still putting up a fight in hand to hand with ork monstrosities.

“I’m very upset! Upset at you Xenos!” Voth screamed, no screeched was a better word, blasting his plasma gun at a duelling pair, killing ork and trooper both.

“You r-ruined everything! Gakk it I was almost finished! I can go home in just  a few weeks!”

Voth swept his blade low, bisecting an ork boy already nearly dead from a sergeant’s chainsaw. The trooper nodded at his captain, who paid him no mind.

“Now I’m going to die here, and its all your fault! Come on! Kill me! I’m right here!”

Voth surrendered himself to death, climbing the ruined parapet as a trio of the alien freaks bellowed cheerfully in their guttural tongue.

“Come on then!” Voth said, his voice starting to crack.

His plasma pistol was surprisingly proficient at dispatching his foes. He also found his orkish enemy tough but slow- like his bullies in the fencing academy.

“Reeeah! Have at you, green dolts!”

As Voth swung with surprising precision his men had never witnessed, the rag tag survivors at the front lines began to blink in bewilderment. Here was there commanding officer, giving his best impression of a pterodactyl, killing aliens like a professional.

About a quarter of them ran, silently thanking the captain for being such a good distraction for the alien. The others shrugged and under the leadership of the surviving sergeants reformed a firing line.

Voth continued to cut and hack at his ork enemies. He was dismally tired and crying hot tears as he groaned and huffed, muttering incomprehensible gibberish back at the charging ork foe.

In short order, a disgusted Nob gestured to some of his shoota’s to finish the idiot outside of cover with the tall cap. Yet, as they aimed, a little imperial miracle occurred: the fire mission coordinates that the company had been waiting on for over half an hour finally bore fruit, and imperial shells rained down before the trench, riddling Voth’s beloved cape with shrapnel holes, and splashing a wave of mud and muck upon his crimson uniform.

“Wait for it meeeeen!” he wailed simpering as he did, but too shocked by the artillery to move. The troopers watching him were genuinely shocked he wasn’t pulverised by shrapnel or incoming rounds. A veteran sergeant even helpfully suggested. “Cap, shouldn’t’ you be takin some cover right about now?”

“THE BAARRRAAAAGEE HAS CEEEEEASSED!” Voth hissed, overcome with emotion to understand current events.

“CHEEEAARRRGE TROOPS! FFFORR TEERRRRRAAAAAA!” He squealed, and charged headlong into a one man charge.

The frontline was confused. Eventually, a lieutenant who had done the logical thing and kept his distance a bit, came and coordinated the troop.

“Right, captain is about to die. If he goes I have command. Cover the captain. If he makes it, we’ll all make a try. Fair?”

A few of the sergeants nodded; that was fair. If an incompetent git like the captain could make it, why couldn’t some hardened heartbreakers make it as well?

Voth tripped into the Ork lines, such as they were. Thankfully, the orks weren’t using trenches perse, more like piles of scrap and trash, along with a few craters. It was fortunate, then, that all Voth managed to stumble into was a pair of grots, who were quickly dispatched by the now completely filthy captain.

With a numbness, Voth fired off a flare into the sky, and dashed through the winding piles of trash, duelling what orks he found.

[This is as far as I got before I tossed the idea out, but there would be about a sentence or two more about how he manages to actually take some Ork names and eventually gets bailed out by some astartes who make his company a premier shock unit in the fleet, and keeps the reputation]

[pass-me-a-cancerstick]

*distant screaming*

*pterodactyl noises*

[themurphyzone]

Organized Chaos

 First time writing Amanda! Some ship tease between Milo and Amanda, but nothing heavy. 

“Amanda, please let me design the yearbooks! I’m begging you!” Chad tearfully knelt, grasping the hem of Amanda’s magenta jacket. He looked up with wide, pleading eyes. “I need this!”

“Chad, designing the yearbooks is not supposed to be fun. It requires the utmost diligence, attention to detail, and extreme patience when you inevitably have to use the library computers that haven’t been replaced since 1992,” Amanda replied, carefully pulling her jacket out of Chad’s hands. “May I ask you why you need this?”

“Extra credit for English,” Chad said, standing up. “I got an F on the last persuasive essay. Nobody told me I couldn’t write about Mr. Drako’s vampirism.”

Amanda sighed. If there was a new conspiracy theory in town, Chad was usually the first to start panicking about it. Like the rest of her peers, she usually ignored his theories. There were enough crazy shenanigans with Milo around. 

“Just because Mr. Drako has family in Romania does not mean-” 

“Watch out! Runaway robot from the engineering club!” 

Speak of the sweatervest. Amanda braced herself. She had only planned for 20 minutes worth of Murphy’s Law on Thursdays. Amanda mentally calculated the amount of time it took to clean up the expired milk at lunch and the fire extinguisher malfunction in Ms. Camilichec’s class. Ate through approximately twelve minutes worth of time I set aside for these disasters. Ay caballo, if this mishap goes over eight minutes I’ll have to cut down on the time I set aside for reorganizing my binder. 

A silver, badly made, 5 foot robot hurtled down the hallway, smoke pouring from a small pipe on its back. One lightbulb eye shone brightly, but the other had fallen out of the socket. Crude wheels left skid marks behind. People scrambled to get out of the way, ducking into nearby classrooms and climbing on top of the lockers to avoid it. Although they had taken cover underneath a flight of stairs, Chad had ducked behind Amanda, shaking nervously. 

“Chad, if you stop using me as a meat shield, I promise I’ll work something out with the yearbook committee,” Amanda offered. 

“You will? I owe you my life!” Chad exclaimed. “I will do anything you say from now on, my lady.” 

“The robot is a good starting place,” Amanda suggested, shifting uncomfortably at being addressed as ‘my lady’. 

“The mission begins,” Chad stepped into the open corridor, spreading his arms wide in the pathway of the robot. His face scrunched up in determination. “YOU SHALL NOT-”

Amanda flinched, covering her eyes. There was a horrible screech as flesh and metal collided. When she looked back, the robot was still careening down the hallway as if nothing had happened. Chad wasn’t so lucky, collapsing on his back.

“Pass...” Chad groaned, before losing consciousness. 

Amanda awkwardly approached him. “It was a good try,” she murmured. 

“Yippi-ki-i-ay, robot!” Milo yelled, twirling several lassos above his head as he rushed down the hall. “Amanda?” he said in surprise. The minor distraction was enough to lose control of the lassos, and several coils rained down on top of them. Milo raised his arm, and Amanda felt a loop tighten on her waist and jerk her forward. She crashed into Milo, who let out a grunt as his back knocked against the lockers. 

At least they were still standing. 

“Sorry about that, Amanda,” Milo laughed nervously. “Usually I’m pretty good with lassos.”

“It’s all right,” Amanda said, checking to make sure there was nothing else in the area that could possibly hurt them. “Don’t you have a robot to catch?”

“About that,” Amanda’s eyes widened when she realized she could feel Milo’s fingers wiggling against hers. She looked down in horror, straining to free her arms from the coils around their waists. “Well, there’s a lot of benefits to being stuck together by failed lassos. None come to mind right now, but I’m sure there’s gotta be one somewhere.” 

I’m in the splatter zone, I’m in the splatter zone, Amanda took a deep breath, straining not to let the dam burst. She was trapped with Milo! Not only that, but now her schedule was completely screwed up! That binder wasn’t going to magically reorganize itself! Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale, you’ll get out of this eventually. Eventually. Probably not in the next five minutes. But eventually is better than never, right?

“Amanda, if you need to scream to let off steam, I don’t mind,” Milo said, reading her thoughts. “I’d offer you a paper bag, but I can’t reach my backpack right now.” 

“I-I’m fine,” Amanda breathed heavily. “I don’t need to vocalize my inner frustrations and demise.” 

“You sure?” Milo asked in concern. 

“N-no, you’re right,” Amanda admitted. “I-I do.” 

Amanda felt Milo stiffen, his body erect and eyes squeezed shut in preparation. “Just let it out. You’ll feel a lot better.” he said.  

“Okay,” Amanda nodded, inhaling sharply. Then a scream erupted from her throat, her pent-up frustrations let loose for all the school to hear. Yearbooks, dumb computers, my schedule, the binder! Argh! she internally wailed. 

After several seconds, her scream died off and she gasped for air. “Sorry, Milo,” she said, grinning awkwardly. “But you were right about letting off steam.” 

Milo’s cowlick had flopped over at some point during her scream. “Are you kidding?” he laughed. “You have some really strong lungs, Amanda! I haven’t heard anyone scream like that since Melissa and I rode Greased Thunder! We should go to Lard World sometime!” 

“Haha, lard and rollercoasters really aren’t my thing,” she giggled, respecting Melissa even more for going on such a dangerous ride with Milo. “And I don’t think anyone’s ever complimented my lungs before.” 

“Well, what’s not to like? We wouldn’t be alive without them! Unless we were fish, or mermaids,” Milo said. 

“Milo, did you catch the robot? I would’ve been here sooner but a certain someone just had to dawdle in music class!” Melissa wasted no time, opening the flap on Milo’s backpack. She dug around to find a can of cheese spray, glaring at Zack. 

“I wasn’t dawdling,” Zack retorted. “I stayed behind to help clean up the spit the brass section left.”

“You see? Dawdling,” Melissa replied. 

Amanda blinked. “Don’t you have a pocket knife? Or scissors?”

“No, I was trying to lasso the robot but it backfired. And pocket knives are against school rules, but I do have a neat Swiss Army one at home,” Milo said. 

“Came in pretty useful during the Woodpecker Incident,” Melissa commented. 

“And nobody’s going to address that Chad’s unconscious?” Zack gestured to Chad’s body. “How did this happen anyway?”

“The robot ran him over,” Amanda explained. “Those treads won’t be easy to wash out.” 

“Robot?” Zack raised an eyebrow. 

“Yeah, that was my bad,” Milo chuckled sheepishly. “I do have all-purpose bleach that can rinse out orange juice, oil, and pterodactyl blood though. I’ll just let him borrow it for a while. Melissa, if you’d please?” 

Melissa’s entire arm vanished into the backpack as she felt around. “Got it!” she exclaimed, holding up a container of bleach. She placed the bleach next to Chad, and attached a sticky note with a hastily-scribbled explanation on it. 

“Mr. Drako has this period off. We got lucky,” Zack sighed. “Let’s get you two free.”

Milo and Amanda attempted to walk, only to stumble as their legs knocked against each other. They shuffled along carefully for several feet, before sending pleading looks to Melissa and Zack. “I’ll take Amanda,” Melissa rested a hand on Amanda’s shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. 

Zack hesitated, his hand hovering uncertainly over Milo as he tried to figure out a good position. “I don’t bite,” Milo said. 

“You don’t, but there are plenty of things that could come out of the vents that would,” Zack finally settled for the strap of Milo’s backpack. 

The other students waved casually to them as they passed by. If anybody else thought anything was strange about this situation, they didn’t let it show. After what felt like an eternity, the quartet finally reached Mr. Drako’s classroom.

“Watch your step. It’s gonna be dark in there,” Melissa cautioned before knocking on the door. 

“Ow, just a minute!” the group flinched as they heard several loud crashes coming from the other side and a cat screeching. “Agnes, get out of the coffins!” 

“Should we ask what the coffins are for or not?” Zack asked. 

“Maybe he sleeps in them,” Milo suggested. “Or it could be for a reenactment.”

“What sort of reenactment would involve coffins?” Melissa asked.  

“Recreating the Egyptian embalming process is the only one I can think of,” Milo mused. “Like how they pulled out the brain through the nose. Or removed most of the internal organs except the heart and treated them with chemicals. And-”

“Milo, I’m just going to warn you right now that I have a delicate stomach,” Amanda gagged, feeling queasy at the thought of treating dead people. 

“Sorry,” Milo said. “But the entire process is pretty cool. And I had a distant relative affected by the Mummy’s Curse once.” 

“Really?” Zack gasped.

“Yup!” Milo nodded. “Turns out she was faking it the entire time. She got kicked out of the sideshow after that.” 

“Oh. I thought you were going to say she died from it,” Zack looked slightly disappointed, as if he had been expecting a better story.

Before Milo could reply, the door opened. Mr. Drako’s tie was askew, and he was wiping his forehead with a cloth. “What can I help you with?” he asked. 

“There was an accident with the robot from the engineering club,” Amanda explained. “Milo was trying to catch it with a lasso, but we got tangled up instead.” 

“And Chad got run over by the robot,” Melissa added. 

“Robot treads are hard to wash out,” Mr. Drako said, shaking his head in sympathy. “Well, come in! I’ll see what I can do about your predicament. Sorry about the mess, I was trying to set up the coffins for a lesson on Ancient Egypt and Agnes keeps climbing in when I’m trying to close them.” 

Mr. Drako’s classroom always had low lighting, but Amanda had never noticed how creepy it actually was until all the chairs had been replaced by coffins. A black cat with amber eyes perched on the teacher’s desk, looking extremely smug. 

“I thought Agnes was your ex-wife,” Zack ran a finger across the cover of a coffin, then carefully wiped the dust on the underside of a desk.

“She is,” Mr. Drako replied. “She named the cat. Never had that much creativity, I’m afraid.” He held up a blunt pair of safety scissors, frowning. “This is the only pair of scissors I have. Of course it’s no good.”

“Normally I’d be asking how the district was able to pay for thirty coffins and not be able to provide us with basic school supplies, but I learned from the Acadecamathalon to never ask those sorts of questions again,” Melissa said. 

“Oh, the district didn’t pay for them,” Mr. Drako said, oblivious to the alarmed faces of his students. Amanda now had a mental image of their teacher raiding an ancient castle for corpses. She immediately switched to thinking of fuzzy, playful puppies and making color-coded schedules. 

Milo was the first to recover from that piece of information. “Yeah. We’re just going to digress now. We were planning to use the mouse that lived in this classroom. And we brought cheese spray!” 

Melissa hesitated. “Maybe someone should take Agnes out of the room first. You don’t want her eating your only hope of freedom.” 

“I wouldn’t say the mouse is our only hope of freedom,” Milo shrugged. “I have tools at home for this. Or we could call your dad, Melissa. Or use one of Mrs. Underwood’s surgical instruments.” 

“I do not want any scalpels or needles near me unless I am actually in a hospital, please,” Amanda warned. 

Mr. Drako found some catnip in a drawer and tickled Agnes’ nose with it, attempting to entice her. Her tail twitched, but she didn’t budge. “Not the catnip type, huh?” Zack asked dryly. 

“Doesn’t look like it,” Mr. Drako replied. “Let’s go Ag-AH! Get her off! Get her off!” She sprang at his face when he tried to pick her up, hissing angrily. 

Melissa and Zack rushed to help dislodge Agnes, while she snapped at them irritably. Melissa retracted her hand, barely avoiding a clawed paw. After several seconds Zack managed to find a good grip on Agnes, and pulled her off. She swiped at the air and thrashed in his arms,fur bristling. 

“I’m glad Bast doesn’t act like that,” Amanda relaxed, not realizing that she had tensed up earlier. 

“You named your cat after an Egyptian goddess? That’s so cool!” Milo exclaimed. 

Amanda blushed at the compliment. “I had a mythology phase when I was little.” She watched as Mr. Drako began applying ointment to the scratches on his face. At least they weren’t that deep. 

“Guys, what do I do now?” Zack asked nervously. His hand brushed the back of Agnes’ ear who quieted instantly from her yowling. “Um, good kitty?” She started nuzzling his neck, purring. “I guess nobody knew about her secret spot.” 

“I’ll say,” Melissa snapped a photo with her phone. 

“You better not be posting that to social media,” Zack continued to scratch Agnes’ head. 

Melissa smirked. “I won’t. Kitties are popular on the net though. You’d be an insta-star for the next half hour.” 

“Zack, you’re like a cat whisperer! But getting back to business, can you distract her while Melissa uses the cheese spray and lures out the mouse?” Milo asked. 

“Okay, I’ll be in the back,” Zack retreated to a distant corner, cooing softly to Agnes the entire time. 

“I’ve never seen Agnes so complacent before. My ex-wife trained her, after all,” Mr. Drako remarked. 

Which probably explains a lot, Amanda thought. She winced as Melissa carefully sprayed the cheese smell on the rope, silently hoping she wouldn’t come away smelling like dairy. 

“We’re just using the standard cheddar one,” Milo explained, sensing her discomfort. “For rodents that are four feet and above, an aged spray works better.” Amanda pulled a face. “We’ve never been in a situation where we needed to use it though.” 

“There was that one time with the rhesus monkeys where we had to ward them off with Limburger cheese,” Melissa wrinkled her nose in disgust, spraying a trail to the mouse hole behind the teacher’s desk. “Done.” She capped the spray, placing it in Milo’s backpack. “Everyone quiet.” 

Amanda worried that Agnes was going to eat the mouse before they could get out, but so far Zack was doing a great job of blocking her view and providing a distraction. Two minutes passed, and a snout finally poked out from the hole. Finally, a gray mouse emerged, following the scent trail to Amanda and Milo. Milo snickered as the mouse climbed up his leg, nibbling at the rope around his waist. Bits of rope fell to the floor. Once Milo’s hands were free, he began to gently tug at the rope that was restraining Amanda’s hands.

She looked away. Suddenly the temperature was rising. My schedule after I get home, she thought. Research okapis for my science project, email members of the Yearbook Committee, hour break for showering and eating, find a way to stop blushing. Why can’t I stop blushing? Why does being around Milo cause everything to be so unpredictable? 

She had to admit, sometimes unpredictability wasn’t a horrible thing. Order and Chaos balanced the world. Without Order, Chaos would destroy and consume everything in its path. Without Chaos, Order would be too rigid and life would no longer have its mysterious charm. 

“Amanda, the rope’s gone,” Milo held up the now useless rope. “I’ll have to get another replacement. Thanks, mouse!” Milo waved to the rodent as it scampered back to its hole. 

She hadn’t realized she was free from the restraints. “Thanks,” she gave him a weak smile, unsure of what to say now. Breathing deeply, she continued. “After school lets out, do you want to go to the store and find some more rope together? The least I can do is pay for it after everything that happened today.” 

“You don’t need to-” Milo’s mouth gaped opened like a fish. “What about your schedule? I know you like everything precise and ordered.”

“My normal schedule for Thursday has been off since 3rd period today,” Amanda shrugged. “Give me ten to fifteen minutes and I can plan accordingly for this outing and the rest of the day. Melissa and Zack can come too if they want.”

“I’m sorry if I messed up your schedule. I didn’t-” Amanda cut him off.

“You didn’t mean to,” she smiled. “I know. And it’s alright. I need a break from all this rigidness.” 

“Well, in that case I’ll accept!” Milo perked up instantly. “You wanna go Melissa?” 

Melissa winked at Amanda. “I just remembered I procrastinated on an essay. I’ll have to finish it when I get home.” Somehow Amanda knew there was more to that excuse, though she couldn’t quite place it.

“That’s too bad,” Milo said in sympathy, turning to the corner where Zack and Agnes sat. “Zack, do you wanna come to the store with Amanda and me after school?” he shouted.

“We do have a light bulb burned out in the living room. Maybe I-” Zack’s eyes widened when he looked over to the side. Milo didn’t notice, but Amanda followed his gaze to Melissa, who was making wild gestures and shaking her head. She stopped and cleared her throat when she spotted Amanda staring at her, rubbing her arms casually. “Uh, maybe I should take the time to actually look at the box they came in even though it’s probably with a bunch of other stuff in the attic so I don’t accidentally buy the wrong model or watts! If I buy the wrong one, then we could have a power failure and the wi-fi would go out and that would be awful!” Zack gave an unconvincing smile. He let go of Agnes, who pawed at his shoes and meowed unhappily. 

“Guess it’s just you and me!” Milo turned to Amanda, grinning from ear to ear.  

Amanda nodded. “Do you want to help me make the schedule? You can help me decide on the colors.”

“Hold on a second, you two,” Melissa gave them a time-out signal. “Has anybody seen Mr. Drako? He just disappeared on us.” 

They looked around, unable to find a trace of their teacher. A snore sounded from a coffin in the front. Milo lifted the cover and peered inside. “He’s asleep,” he said. “Do you think these coffins are more comfortable than they look?” 

“Who knows?” Melissa replied. 

“Let’s go,” Amanda tugged on Milo’s arm. “Before the library gets up and walks away.” 

“Technically the library can’t get up and walk away,” Milo said as they exited the classroom. “Unless it’s secretly a robot.” 

“There’s a lot of potential outcomes if the library was secretly a robot,” Amanda said, smiling softly. 

Murphy’s Law was unpredictable. And sometimes a little chaos and the element of surprise were exactly what she needed.