#*confused aroace noises*

[bookishnewt]

This man looks like he popped out of the manga/anime. And his freaking voice fits so well!

[ya-boi-haru]

Someone venting to me: "- and we haven't even had sex for 2 weeks!"

My Asexual ass: "and that's..... a long time?"

[mamawasatesttube]

the thing about aroace bart and qp konbart is that. AAAAAAAAAAA

[kavehater]

UGHDKDOSLSSKS !!!!

[bookishnewt]

Hey girlies you would never believe who i drew

[leikeliscomet]

Racism in the ace community is seen as a joke from the outside and a confusing concept in the inside but it's pretty bait tbh:

Barbie, Wednesday and Elsa are ace-coded but not canon aces but they're widely accepted as ace icons in the community. Lacking genitalia, disliking romance and being single are not inherently asexual yet the community happily claims them as ace solely on those reasons. But Selah Summers? Nah she actually didn't say the words "aroace" even though the director confirmed it so she didn't really count. Abbi Singh? Nah she had a girlfriend and her superpower is being a succubus and it's not like the Imperfects actually addressed the themes of an asexual lesbian South Asian woman and her sexuality or anything. Fei Hargreeves? Well yeah the actress and producer confirmed it but she never said it on screen. Ace characters of colour always get held "screened" for approval to be "real rep" in a way white aces aren't its so weird (this also happens to gay aces but that's another post)

Almost anything involving Yasmin Benoit. The reason she's unacceptable ace rep is because of misogynoir. She's spoken so many times about never dating and not having sex (which mind you is none of our business and she shouldn't need to explain herself in the 1st place) and yet she's "too sexual" to represent the community. Again with the nitpicking, popular white ace accounts were so quick to dogpile her for not-so-good takes but when she speaks about racism? Crickets. When she spoke about sexual harassment? Crickets and not only that but they defended her harasser. The main ace activists that defended her were other Black aspecs.

Not understanding how desexualisation affects POC. Specifically, Black women are excluded from representations of love and sex because we're seen as undesirable. It's common for TV/Film to pair up everyone but the Black girl, or have a rebound Black partner for the non-Black main character who's disposed of when they're ready for their "real" non-Black partner again. This isn't done for Black aspecs benefit. It's a form of dehumanisation. Friendship especially in m/f is needed but exclusively pushing for friendship between Black women and non-Black men when there is romance coded or confirmed and shaming Black women in fandom or in show for shipping the Black female character is not doing what you think its doing.

Not understanding how sexualisation effects POC. Again linking to Yasmin, POC, especially Black people have been sexualised due to white supremacy. The "allosexual privilege" framework fails to acknowledge this because Black people's sexual attraction and sex is seen as aggressive and animalistic. Black people aren't "allowed" to be ace because of this sexualisation and why Yasmin regardless of what she wears or does is seen is too promiscuous.

Not acknowledging ace POC as ace rep. Again, where was the acknowledgement of Selah and the Spades as groundbreaking rep? The first aroace darkskin Black girl as a lead in any film? Sherronda J Brown spoke about Big Mouth's Black ace character and someone said it didn't count just bc they dislike the show. Again with Abbi and Fei the community didn't make noise for them like they did Todd from Bojack Horseman or Florence from Sex Ed (mind you the gap between how they did Florence vs O is jarring in itself) Isaac from Heartstopper was inspirational for many aspecs and I wont take that away but the way he's instantly credited for ace representation when he has so little screentime compared to the others is wild.

Just tired tbh. "Listen to POC aces!" "POC aces are valid!" Prove it then...?

[desperate-daydream]

hi! can i rq a five hargreeves x aroace reader (friendship obvi) where reader is very anxious/paranoid & one of their comforts is touch, so five is always near them or lending him their jacket/small acts of care type of thing

☂️Umbrella Academy

❀ five hargreeves x gn aroace reader ⚣

A/N: Oh my gods, I'm still alive! XD thanks for your request! I hope you still enjoy this story even though it took a really really long time.

tags/warnings: swearing, reader has anxiety, five has flashbacks; plays in season 1

the best team

Five Hargreeves was a smart and strategic man but he had a soft spot; for his annoying siblings and you. You had started off as partners in the commission and became friends over time. He was the one person you had told about you being aroace - which he could relate to - and he knew about your anxiety. 

You were a great team together that always supported each other. You would help him with his flashbacks and he would help you with your anxiety. 

And that was about to skyrocket right now. You had helped Five to figure out the right equations to get back to his family and then he was finally able to do the jump - of course taking you with him. But apparently something went wrong because when you landed on the other side of the portal you were both in the bodies of your teenager-selves. 

“Fuck, something went wrong”, you heard Five muttering to himself. You were speechless when you looked up from your younger hands to the adults standing in front of you. One of them just asked: “Can you see little Five too?”. Then Five looked up too before his gaze went towards you. You felt like you increasingly couldn’t breathe anymore and looked at Five with wide eyes. 

You heard a noise and only when Five hurried to get up you realized that it came from you. 

„Okay, listen to my voice. Blend out everything else. Breath y/n. Breathe with me, alright?“ 

He blocked most of your view towards the adults who didn‘t know how to react yet. He took your hands in his to help you steady yourself - since one of your comforts was touch - and with some more helpful words and methods you calmed down. 

Five helped you get up then and went to the door while dragging you behind him and almost seemingly ignoring the adults who were then coming back to their senses. 

They followed closely asking what happened or simply repeating his name like they couldn‘t believe that he was right there. 

While walking you spotted your reflection in a mirror on the wall and flinched - you really were in the body of your younger self. 

You reached the kitchen and Five started making sandwiches as well as coffee for him and cocoa for you. 

„What are you doing?“, the tall woman asked. 

„And who is that?“, a guy in full black attire added. 

„We both need sugar to recharge“, he answered while continuing his work. You were just standing there merely happy that you didn‘t go into full panik. 

„And who the fuck is that?!“, the man repeated himself and emphasised it with a gesture towards you. 

„That is y/n. We’re colleagues.“

To others this description might‘ve felt offensive. You knew that in connection to you it meant you were trusted friends. 

„Colleagues?“, the confusion was clear on all their faces. 

Your mind slowly cleared and you started realizing that those people were Five‘s siblings. He had told you quite a lot about them - you were also the only one he had talked to about them. 

„Yes“, his answer had a little sharpness in it and your gaze shot up to him. You knew what that meant. He had pulled you out of your panic, now you started doing your best to prevent him from having a flashback. 

His gaze was already a bit out of focus and his movements slowed down so you hurried to get to him and touched his shoulder carefully. 

„Hey, you‘re not there anymore“, you slowly moved him around to the sink and turned on cold water. While you waited for it to be cold enough you pushed up the sleeves of his now way too big suit. 

Running cold water over his hands and forearms has always been pretty effective to get Five back in his body. You were relieved when he looked at you after a moment and nodded as a thank you. 

You turned off the water and dried both your hands. 

“Everything okay?”, one of his siblings asked with his brows furrowed. “Yes”, you answered while Five brushed it off with a wave of his hand. 

You helped him finish your snacks and stayed close to calm both of you. When you sat down at the table to eat it his siblings started their questions again. 

They had a lot of those and you spent enough time on this table that you leaned on your friend’s shoulder from being tired out. Five put his arm around you to steady your upper body. That way you rested a bit before both of you went to save the world - as the best team you'll ever see.

[rainbowgod666]

...uuuuuuhhh

[bookishnewt]

Of all the champions Urbosa is probably my favorite.

[gammija]

Wrote this all last night in a rush after thinking about aroace podlock too hard - not sure how good it is but people on the discord liked it! so y'all will get it too

[Rushing sounds. At first it sounds like white noise, but there's a rhythm to it, swelling and ebbing; waves crashing onto sand. Wind whistles past the mic occasionally, while soft footsteps can be heard underneath. A quiet beach...

...Well, quiet, except for John giving one of his characteristic introductions to a mailbag episode, before starting proper.]  

JOHN: ...Okay, first question is for Sherlock, from Gammijonk - thought the 'Jonk' joke was starting to die down a bit, but apparently not! This one can be quite a, uh, heavy one, mate, so totally up to you if you want to answer or not. 

They ask: "No need to answer if you feel uncomfortable," like I said, and then the question is, "As what sexuality do you identify, and how did you come to realize?" Again, I'll just edit this out and we can start with another one if you don't want to share that kind of info with the listeners.  

SHERLOCK: No need, it's... alright. I'm in a sharing mood, I find. Not sure whether it's the calming effect of the noise from the waves or something else. 

...I, uh, consider myself to be asexual.  

JOHN: ...Uh- what- but- I mean, not that I'm disagreeing with you on your own identity and such, but I thought you told me you were gay? 

SHERLOCK: I definitely did not.  

JOHN: No, I distinctly remember, after the Gloria Scott case - I asked you if you had been in a relationship with Trevor. And you said yes!  

SHERLOCK: Correct.  

JOHN: Okay, well, so, then...?  

SHERLOCK: I- well. Let's see... I could, try to describe it another way?

JOHN: Right, right. I've actually heard of that before, now you mention it... So that's you, then?  

Within aspec identities, there is often a distinction made between sexual attraction, and romantic attraction. Sexual attraction is when you look at a person and feel like you want to have sex with them. Romantic attraction is when you look at a person and want to have a romantic relationship with them.

For most people, these two kinds of attraction seem to be intrinsically linked, but just as someone could conceivably have a romantic relationship without sex, or two people can have sex without being in a romantic relationship, so too is it possible to feel one kind of attraction, but not the other.  

SHERLOCK: Ah, no. The distinction feels meaningless when applied to myself. 

But, I mentioned it, because I feel it illustrates something of the complicated semantics when it comes to identity, sexuality and romance.  

To get back to the original question for a moment as to how I realized; When I was very young, I wasn't thinking about attraction at all. Then, as a young teenager, my sexuality felt noteworthy only in that it seemed to make me worthy of praise, a rarity: other boys were constantly doing stupid things, willing to do anything to impress a girl-  

JOHN: -While you were only doing stupid things for the love of the game?  

SHERLOCK: Hah. Quite. Well, mostly in order to follow my hyperfixations wherever they lead me, but I won't deny that as a teenager I might not have always been capable of making the brightest decisions. 

In any case, as I got older, I began to realise that my lack of attraction was not, in fact, a sign that I was simply better than the other boys, but something that required a different explanation. So, I did what I do best, and I began to... experiment.  

During that time, I eventually entered into a relationship with Trevor Scott. And those relationships would lead me to eventually learn the terms asexuality and aromanticism, in fact. Looking back, I still didn't feel romantic attraction for Trevor or others then, either. But a romance certainly was the way I and him viewed it at the time. And I certainly did love him.  

JOHN: Right, that makes sense.  

SHERLOCK: So, you see, that's where your confusion stemmed from.

Anyways, now that I had a name for my experiences, after that there followed a brief and unfortunate period in which I felt like I had to figure out whether my asexuality originated in one of my neurodivergences, or if those were two unrelated ways in which I deviated from the societal norm.

Thankfully I quickly came to the conclusion that that would be a fruitless endeavour, like trying to prove a negative. There is only one version of me, and he is asexual, and he is autistic. Whether or not those two facts are related, is frankly irrelevant.  

...That answers the question, I believe?  

JOHN: It definitely does. Wow, mate. That was a lot of talking, for one of these! Man. Feels difficult to follow up with some question about what's our favourite, finger, or something... That was just an example, they, they didn't actually ask that.  

...Do you... want a hug?  

SHERLOCK: Uhm, sure? Yes. I could go for one. Any particular reason why?  

JOHN: Not really - just felt like giving you one.  

[Fabric rustles. It's quiet for a long moment, only wind and waves.]  

SHERLOCK: ... If we count the thumb as a finger, obviously that's my favourite.  

JOHN: Obviously?  

[END] 

[leilani-lily]

~Oh Deer~ (Chapter 7)

Apologies for the delay, life has been a lil busy for me lately. Lots going on, and only more to happen. My introverted battery is crying ദ്ദി ꒦ິ꒳꒦ິ )✧

This chapter's a lil shorter than some of the others, but it's for the best. The next one I have planned is gonna be a 2 parter. And it'll be a whopper. Wish me luck hehe! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Synopsis: AroAce! Alastor x Chef!Singer! Reader. It's time for the daily meeting amongst the hotel staff and guests. You're feeling particularly exhausted, and before you know it, you fall asleep. What you don't realize is what kind of chaos it causes afterwards… Word count: 3.7 k

Chapter under the cut!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“What if we offad a free bag o ‘Hero-In’ tada first 50 custamers?”

Charlie blinked in bewilderment down at the Spider Demon, not sure if he was actually being serious. The other resident demons either nodded in agreement or weren’t even paying attention to the conversation, blinking tiredly and eyes glazed over. Vaggie groaned in frustration at the apparent lack of brains in this hotel.

“Por el amor de Dios.” she muttered under her breath, dragging her face down with her hand. “Angel. We can’t offer drugs to encourage more guests to the hotel. That goes against, like, everything we’re even doing here.” She gestures to the hotel lobby, where you were all sitting on various armchairs and couches. It was one of your daily meetings where Charlie rounded up all the demons and tried to come up with strategies on how to recruit more sinners. Her and Vaggie were standing before you all, a chalkboard behind them with… some pretty terrible suggestions scribbled on it (and a faded dick drawing done by a certain 8 limbed demon). Said sinner looked around his settings before turning back to the silver haired woman, looking at her in confusion.

“Booze?”

“No.”

“Dildos?”

“Jesus. NO.”

“Blowjobs??”

“FOR FUCK SAKES ANGEL!”

“Whaaaat? Sounds like a good deal ta me! Especially if da blowin’s done by a prafessional like yours truly~!” Angel wiggled his chest fur rather sensually towards Vaggie and threw her a wink. The fallen angel slapped her hand against her face in exasperation. 

Now usually this type of banter would have you practically shaking in your seat trying to hold in your laughter. But this time around, all you could muster was a tired chuckle as your eyes ping-ponged between the two. Your early mornings and long days at the hotel were starting to catch up with you, and today in particular was extra exhausting for you. You had spent most of the night reading, too absorbed in the novel to put it down even though you knew how late it was. And now you were paying the price; all you wanted to do was sleep. But then Charlie called this meeting and now you were stuck here, daydreaming of your bed. 

“W-well Angel, I’m afraid I have to agree with Vaggie on this,” Charlie piped up, awkwardly looking between her partner and friend, “But I am LOVING the participation and enthusiasm! Good job!” She clapped cheerfully to Angel, trying so hard to encourage his good habits, even if his suggestions were questionable. Angel clicked his teeth at Charlie while shooting a finger gun, slouching back into his armchair. The Princess of Hell turned back to the group, her expression a mix of determination and desperation. 

“Alright everyone, what else do we got? Come on, let’s keep the creative juices flowing!”

Other demons' voices droned on in response, but you could feel your brain shutting down as they faded to muffled noise. You were seated comfortably on one of the couches, feeling yourself being swallowed into the cushy pillows. It was honestly really nice being able to sit on this couch in particular, it was the comfiest of all the furnishing here. 

When you had first arrived at the hotel and attended these meetings, you were sitting in one of the armchairs beside Angel. And you had to admit, they were pretty stiff. But at some point, as you and Alastor’s friendship began to grow, the deer demon began inviting you to sit on the couch beside him, and even began saving you the seat before anyone else could take it. What more, would even begin to shoot glares at demons if they attempted to take it before you had arrived.

You had caught wind and scolded your friend for a moment, but he insisted with how much work you were doing, you deserved the cushy spot more than anyone else. And that just so happened to be beside him. You had eyed him suspiciously but didn’t argue further; it really was a nice couch. Now it was just known fact that you and the Radio Demon always sat together, and others didn’t even attempt to sit there anymore. 

Beside you, Alastor watched as your body sank into the couch and brought a hand up to stifle a yawn. His eyebrow quirked up in amusement, but he didn’t attempt to try and keep you awake.  He could tell this meeting wasn’t going anywhere; there was no point in forcing you to participate. Instead, his pupils slid back to the group of demons in front of him. Somehow Nifty and Sir Pentious had gotten into an argument, and Vaggie was yelling over them to shut up and stay focused. Alastor’s smile creaked up eerily, reveling in the chaos unfolding before him. Charlie looked at her business partner, a semblance of despair in her eyes.

“Alastor,” she practically begged, “Please tell me you have some suggestions that we could actually use?” 

Alastor gave a hearty laugh as he waved a hand at her.

“Oh please my dear,” he dismissed, shaking his head and giving her a smug look, “You know very well that I do not participate in such matters. I’m simply here for the entertainment that comes with it~!” He gestures to the three demons arguing in question, as Angel and Husk seemed to be sharing a bowl of popcorn and watched the mayhem. Charlie looked at the group tiredly.

“Besides,” Alastor drawled on, his eyes practically dancing at the chaos before him, “I honestly think-!”

His voice was cut off by the sound of a record player scratching to a halt.

The group of demons that were bickering immediately stopped dead in their tracks at the sudden abnormal sound, their gazes zipping to the Radio Demon. Angel and Husk’s eyes also locked in on the deer demon, a piece of popcorn falling out of Angel’s open mouth.

Alastors was frozen in place as your sleeping form had slumped up against his side. 

The deer demon looked like he was caught in the headlights; His entire face was frozen and eyes wide as dinner plates, smiling mouth still half open in mid speech. His whole body was stiff as a board as his shrunken pupils stared off ahead in shock. 

The room fell quiet enough to hear a pin drop.

Every one of the hotel residents were ready to shit themselves, eyes darting between you and Alastor. Anyone that knew the Radio Demon knew how much he despised physical contact not initiated by him. Husk especially was terrified for your sake, fully remembering Alastor practically ripping demons apart limb by limb simply because they looked at him the wrong way. The gambling demon’s fur began to stand up on his neck. This couldn’t be good.

You sighed in your sleep and nuzzled closer into Alastor’s arm, subconsciously seeking out his warmth. All of the onlookers breathed in sharply, Charlie even covering her mouth with her hands to keep herself quiet. The Radio Demon’s eyes slowly slid down to you, carefully tilting his head to get a better look. His eyes looked over you, pupils sharp and calculating as his open mouth creaked shut and grin tight. Everyone watched in horror, unsure what the Overlord was thinking or what he was going to do.

Alastor’s first instinct was to immediately shove you away. But he quickly pushed that thought aside once coming to terms that this was you. As much as he wanted to peel your body off of his, another part was… intrigued. He had never been in this type of situation before, and moreso, with someone he actually found tolerable. He noticed the dark circles under your eyes and mentally tutted you. It was clear you were more exhausted than he had realized, especially given you had fallen asleep amongst all the commotion. And he knew first hand how early you were up everyday; how hard you worked for this hotel. Hell, you were one of the hardest working ones here, besides Charlie and Vaggie. 

Mentally coming to a decision, Alastor’s shoulders began to soften, his body finally beginning to relax under the newfound weight. Your rest was far more important than this silly meeting that wasn’t going anywhere anyways. His chivalrous nature had ultimately won out.

“Hey uh… Smiles…” Angel stuttered, his voice low and cautious as to not wake you, “Ya… Ya got a lil Puddin’ on ya sholda” He pointed to your sleeping form, his eyes darting nervously between you both. Vaggie immediately zipped to the Spider demon and slapped her hand over his mouth, shooting daggers at him before looking nervously at Alastor. Eventually, the Radio Demon’s eyes slid lazily to the group of anxious sinners, his lips curling up in amusement as he observed everyone’s expressions. If you weren’t sleeping on his shoulder he would’ve relished in their horror. Careful not to move too much, he turned his head back to the group.

“Now then,” he murmured, his voice surprisingly low, “If the three of you finished with your ridiculous squabbling… ” He shot Nifty, Sir Pentious, and Vaggie a dirty look, making the three  cower under his judgemental gaze. His eyes narrowed a moment before turning to Charlie.

“Then I believe we should really get back to our brainstorming. Wouldn’t you agree, Charlie dearest~?”

The goat demon stared at Alastor in surprise, eyes flicking to you before back to him. Her eyes squinted in confusion at the scene in front of her; Alastor… was allowing this? But she quickly shook it off, realizing he was still waiting for her reply. After blinking a couple times, her eyes lit up with joy as her smile overtook her face.

“YES! Yes of course we-!” 

Alastor’s static crackled dangerously as radio channels shuffled in the background. His scarlet eyes flashed red, shooting Charlie a look of warning. The princess immediately covered her mouth, silencing her thunderous excitement. With a quick clearing of her throat, she continued, her voice softer this time.

“Yes. Right. Everyone, let’s continue from where we left off.”

For the next twenty minutes, the group of demons quietly continued their discussion and strategies. Alastor sat in complete silence, his grin casual and hands in his lap as he sat still. Only his pupils moved as his gaze darted between the sinners. You continued to sleep soundly against the Radio Demon’s shoulder, nuzzling even closer to his warmth and even wrapping your arms around his at one point. He only flinched a moment when he felt your arms trapping his, but he made no other movement; no change in expression. 

As the discussion continued amongst the others, the group couldn’t help but glance at you and Alastor on occasion, still in utter bewilderment at the entire situation. He must have been sick… or an ulterior motive maybe? They all secretly had many inquiries, but none of them dared to question the Overlord. Especially with the way he acted if one of them spoke too loudly. The dangerous hum of static would remind them of their place, and the power he held in this establishment.

Finally, the meeting was adjourned by the Princess of Hell, and everyone began to trickle out of the lobby. Alastor could hear the various murmurs of confusion between the demons as they left to go back to their room, but he ignored them. Little whispers between rats were of no concern to him. Charlie slowly approached the couch, eyes darting between the two figures and smiling sheepishly.

“Do you want me to take her?” she whispered, arms outstretched as if ready to take your sleeping form. But the Radio Demon raised his unshackled hand as if to halt her, shaking his head softly with eyes closed. 

“No need to fret my dear,” he reassured, opening his eyes and giving a gentlemanly smile, “I will see to it that our little chef is taken care of.” 

Charlie hesitated a moment, unsure of what exactly was going through her business partner’s mind. But finally, she nodded her head and tip-toed away, meeting her angelic partner at the elevators. Hand in hand, Charlie and Vaggie left the vicinity, leaving you and Alastor alone in the lobby. 

As silent seconds passed, the Radio Demon’s eyes eventually slid down to your sleeping profile, a mix of amusement and slight curiosity crossing his features. You looked so small, so vulnerable and helpless compared to his tall, powerful form. He watched as your shoulders slowly rose and fell with every breath. Your body was warm against his arm, your head heavy on his shoulder as your entire weight pressed on him. It was a feeling foreign to him; he had never had anyone rest on him in an unconscious state. In all honesty, if baffled him. 

No one had ever seemed so… comfortable around him. The group of demons were scared out of their wits for your safety because of the stories they’d heard. And they had a right to be scared. He was the Radio Demon after all. An all powerful Overlord and a force to be reckoned with. He could strike fear into the heart of any creature, make them fall to their knees and beg for their lives and for his forgiveness. There were only a certain handful that could match his power, and even then that number was dwindling (he would make sure of it). He was a terror. A killer. A living nightmare. And yet…

Here you were, sound asleep on his arm, peaceful and unaware of the position you were in.

Your fingers twitched under his bicep, eyelids fluttering a moment before you stilled again. Clearly you were dreaming about something, and it made Alastor wonder what was going on in that little mind of yours. What was it you dreamed about? Perhaps reliving your life before you descended to Hell? Or maybe… Reliving a memory of when you had spent time with him? Alastor rolled his own eyes at that last question, yet his pride couldn’t help but wonder. Would it be obscured of him to think he could occupy a spot in your mind? 

You stirred a moment against his arm, and Alastor was immediately taken out of his trance. Your face twitched a moment, before scrunching up as if in disgust. Alastor had to catch himself at your expression. Your face eventually settled back into a relaxed state, but a soft, low chuckle still managed to escape the demon’s lips.

Yep. Definitely a dream about him.

Shaking his head mirthfully, 2 long tentacles of shadow began to rise up from the floor. Ever so gently, the shadows lifted your head and body off of Alastor, allowing the deer demon to carefully remove his imprisoned arm from your grasp and stand up. He took a moment to stretch his neck and roll his shoulder around, the stiffness of not moving for nearly half an hour catching up to him. Finally, he turned back to you, still sleeping soundly and being cradled by his shaded tendrils in bridal style. A thought crossed his mind as he looked over at you, taking a moment to evaluate his next move. 

He could very easily snap his fingers and have you transported to your bed. Or have his shadows carefully carry you to your room while he trailed behind. But somehow, despite all of the options he had debated on, he found his arms slowly reaching out underneath you and pulling your body close to his. You immediately curled up closer to him and his warmth, making the Overlord stiffen a moment. But finally, he began to saunter towards the elevators, his shaded tentacles slipping back into the floor.

Of course, being the Hotel’s Facility Manager, he knew exactly where your room was. And obviously, he had a spare key. Using his shadows to unlock the door, he carefully opened the door and stepped inside, stopping a moment to take in his surroundings. He had never actually been in your room before, and he was surprised to discover how fascinated he was about it.

Naturally, it was washed in a deep maroon colour like every other room in this building. It was mostly clean, save for a few articles of clothing scattered around the floor. He simply chuckled softly to himself.  Honestly, what was he going to do with you… 

Your odor was faint in the room, but was still picked up by the demon thanks to his heightened animalistic senses. He took a moment to breathe it in, shocking even himself at how he enjoyed the smell. Like the scent of spring after a chilling, heartless winter, mixed with your own natural musk. He quickly shook his head from his thoughts, suddenly feeling disgusted in himself and his barbaric impulse. 

He noticed an old record player in the corner with various records tucked away. He sauntered over and peeked at the various discs, using his magic to lift them to his face and inspect them. He was impressed with your mix of genres, not at all surprised by the jazz music, but also intrigued by your interest in classical, old fashioned rock and roll, and showtunes. He hummed contently to himself, realizing he could learn a thing or two about you by the contents in your room. And oddly enough, he wanted to learn more. 

Call it the hunter in him. 

You had a large bookshelf similar to his, and he took a moment to browse the titles you had. Mainly cookbooks, which were of no surprise to him, but there were mixes of fantasy and romance as well. 

Romance. Ugh. 

Alastor practically rolled his eyes at some of the disgustingly cheesy titles. How people, women in particular, found this entertaining was beyond him. Especially those who would write about it. 

Pathetic.

Still, he couldn’t help but wonder what it was that made them so popular to begin with. And if they seemed to be something that you in particular enjoyed, then perhaps… he would be willing to give it a second chance. 

One book in particular caught his eye, sticking halfway out from the shelf. Most likely the one you had finished most recently. A green hue pulled it off the shelf as he flipped it open and pursued the contents. After reading a couple sentences, he felt himself stiffen; his eyes widening and smile growing uncomfortable. 

Were all romance novels nowadays so… sultry? He knew sexual activities were popular for most beings. But for Hell’s sake, the novel was practically filth. Instinctively, the book became engulfed in a green flame, burning in seconds. Alastor watched the fires fizz out, ashes of what once was your novel now fluttering and disappearing into thin air.

Hm… hopefully you wouldn’t notice it missing. 

He was learning many things about you with his little scavenge through your room. Things that he found oddly charming. Others he found… debateable. Nevertheless, one good thing could be said about the secrets he had discovered. The Radio Demon’s grin began to widen deliciously at the thought.

He could so use this information against you in the near future. 

You murmured softly against his chest, causing the demon to focus back on you and away from his scheming thoughts. As much as he would’ve loved to continue to snoop around, he knew he had to finish what he had originally come to do. 

With a sigh of contentment, he proceeded to walk to the edge of your bed, once again using his emerald magic to pull the covers back. As gingerly as he could, Alastor lowered you to the bed and carefully removed his arms out from under you. Your one hand had somehow clutched onto the lapel of his jacket, causing him to chuckle before gently unfurling your fingers from his suit. Finally, you had settled in the bed and curled up on yourself, already missing the heat from Alastor’s body. Long, clawed fingers grabbed at the blankets by your feet and pulled them up to your chin, making sure every inch of you was covered and enveloped in the sheets. 

You sighed in your sleep as he pulled his hands away, and Alastor took a moment to take in the sight. Even throughout the meeting, and with all the movement of him picking you up and walking around, you had remained fast asleep. It had simply proven how fatigued you were. His mind flashed back to his mother, remembering how tirelessly she would work to provide for the family, and the many nights when he would catch her sleeping at the kitchen table, bills and notices scattered around her. How helpless he felt as a child, not able to do anything to ease her workload or stress.

He looked down at you, eyes flickering over your sleeping form and feeling something stir inside of him. He couldn’t be there for his mother, not as a weak, impotent child. But he was grown now. And he was strong; practically a God with the power he held over Hell. And he would make sure to repay the debt he owed, one way or another. 

His hand reached out and paused for a second, as if debating. But something urged him on, and his hand found its way to the top of your head. He began to gently pet your hair, feeling the tendrils slide between his fingertips. You hummed in your sleep, causing the deer demon to flinch and ready to sink into the shadows. But then you sighed contently and subconsciously nuzzled your head into his hand, a soft smile curling up before relaxing again.

Unbeknownst to Alastor, his ear twitched. 

He had to stop his own grin from creeping up higher on his face as he continued his previous motions, feeling his body relax and eyes soften. He continued the gentle caresses, embracing the peaceful silence and watching your chest rise and fall with each delicate breath. Eventually, Alastor had felt like he had overstayed his welcome, and slowly removed his hand from your head. As your hair tumbled through his fingers and fell to the pillow, he couldn’t help to lean over and whisper in your ear.

“Sweet dreams, my little songbird~”

He quietly stepped away from your bed, taking a moment to pick up your scattered clothing around the room before placing them in the laundry hamper nearby. And with a final peek to your sleeping form, the Radio Demon’s smile curled up ever so slightly before carefully shutting the door behind him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Y-yeah Alastor... Those romance writers sure are pathetic... pff... pffffft (; ̫ಠ ̫U ̫ಠ ̫ ̫; ̫) We do love a self deprecating joke around here k'know

FIRST PREVIOUS NEXT

[realgoogleclassroom]

top of what?

Bottom of what?

Dear corpos

[madamefeu]

Alastor: Don't pick a fight with me! I have my shadow powers!

Vox: I have my hypnotic eye!

Alastor: I'll tear you to shreds!

Vox: I'll electrocute you!

Alastor: I'll spit in your face!

Vox: I'll like it! I'll bite your lip and make you fucking bleed after I spit in your mouth!

Alastor: *confused aroace noises*

[soapyoapy]

thoughts on dnp's new video

hey y'all. no one asked for it but here's a review of dip and pip's outfits from their new video from a costume design student's perspective.

*disclaimer: this is all for fun and totally my opinion, everyone has a different style, i’m just working with what they’ve worn before and what they seem to like wearing*

Category 1: Y2Gay

Phil:

🤔 i don’t know how to feel about this one… it’s not horrendous but dare i say he didn’t go far enough. i’m an ARMY so i can see j-hope wearing this but perhaps the reason why is would work is because he’d add like a white bucket hat, some sunglasses, and some colorful jewelry to fully commit to the maximalist style. also phil doesn’t really suit the baggy style imo. correct me if im wrong.

rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️ (add some accessories)

Dan:

honestly, i love the sweater. i saw it in the photocards and loved it. this is how dan should wear color tbh. my only critiques would be: a. what are the straps for??? and b. i wonder how it’d look with a dark colored tank top underneath it instead of a black one 🤷🤷

rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Category 2: Americore

Dan:

umm…keep the jacket on. i’m sorry, the shirt is too much 😅😅 also i’m so confused by the pants. that’s it. maybe instead of that shirt have just like a nice white shirt. or maybe phil’s out of date gaming console shirt. the eagles are just a lot to look at. also ditch the crocs. again, sorry. a good black chonky sneaker would fit the look better.

rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Phil:

i agree with phil that the blue shoes don’t really fit. but i have a solution. wear some white sneakers and the blue mesh top from the q&a video or just a matpat-style blue jacket. other than that, this outfit works. especially with the blonde hair.

rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Category 3: Stranger Materials

Phil:

phil, please please please get that jacket fitted. it looks ever so slightly too big on him. hot take: the pants aren’t terrible. it’s just terrible with the jacket. the lines are not going in the same direction and it’s really distracting. i think they’d both have the effect he wanted just on their own. not together.

rating: ⭐️⭐️

Phil pt2:

i agree with dan. the pants are the issue. they aren’t the right shade of blue or the same pattern. major clash and if they were performing, it’d be very distracting.

rating: ⭐️

Dan:

ok. at least it matches 😝 considering he bought is from an ✨adults only website✨ not bad. would probably make too much noise to be an actual outfit he’d wear onstage with mics and all that but for fashion…kinda slays

rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Category 4: Serving Shorts

Phil:

🫢 umm…ok so, how did he not know the shorts were see through?? perhaps it did show on the website but if it was from the same place as the vest and the vest was mesh then you’d assume the shorts were too?? idk anyways. its giving backup dancer construction worker if that makes sense. i’d say go all the way add some fingerless gloves and some design to the shirt and/or vest. go full jojo siwa with it. i do also love the color coordination.

rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

Dan:

eh…that’s it. it’s not awful it’s not great. maybe it he coordinated the blue with the top. it just looks like a dude headed to the gym. i like the shoes. they do look like the cover of a 90s boy band album. nothing amazing. if the star was blue and silver i’d like it more

rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Bonus Round:

Dan:

honestly…as a neurodivergent person, this is just a good item 🤣🤣 it looks so soft. not even from a designer perspective but a sensory perspective. i’d buy it. maybe in a different color but still. (also if it’s like an ✨adults website✨ thing plz let me know idk anything im aroace 😅)

rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ (for the goofs)

Phil:

question. where would you wear this other than a disco/party? this outfit looks really fun. the only thing i'd add to this would be some white boots or sneakers with rainbow laces.

rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (for the goofs)

thank you for reading the ramblings of a junior costume design student who is using this video as procrastination from doing their lighting design homework. I hope you all have a good rest of your day! ✌️✌️ go ahead and tell me if any of the things I said were wrong i don't know anything 😊😊

[14th-century-verona-queer]

Okay so i have NEVER (and i mean NEVER) watched TUA, but my wonderful and amazing friend @aroacebooknerd is a huge fan and quite genuinely 99.9% of what they’ve posted recently has been reblogs of people who are angry about the S4 ending and the character assassination of Five

so here’s basically what I know about season four (and TUA in general):

TUA fans: Oh boy! I can’t wait for the season 4 finale, we’re finally gonna get closure! I’m hoping all the characters will finally be happy and something with marigolds will happen! TUA director (i think): uhm actually no we’re going to give this practically cannon aroace character a love interest and make him a homewrecker! That’s what you guys wanted right? TUA fans: *unintelligible screeching and angry noises*

So heres what i know:

Marigolds?? Those are important for the ending for some reason

a man named Klaus who sets off my gaydar and smth abt him being a stripper? (He’s like my queen Dan wildes, pop off king)

Five (I I still don’t know why he’s named after a number?) is somehow like 75 but also 18

This woman named..uh I forget, but her actors name is Rita I think and apparently she’s like 34 and agreed to cheat on her loving husband (who’s five’s brother) with five. this is so potent with the stench of pedophilia. this is so not okay. you can’t just be like “oh but he’s 18 so he’s legal so it’s okay!” Like NO SIR THATS NOT OKAY

apparently they waited for fives actor to be like 18 before they forced him to kiss Rita or wtv??? like…that is illegal sir? or if it’s not it should be?? Wtf??

I saw a picture of the kiss that happened between them and I started genuinely BURSTING OUT LAUGHING. and not in the “haha that’s hilarious!” Way but in the “HAHA OMFG THIS IS SO NOT FUNNY AND STUPID” way. Like. that kiss looked so uncomfortable. you can TELL that five’s actor is uncomfortable. wtf guys.

the trans guys voice got deeper!! that’s so good for him!! we love seeing representation of trans people and their journeys through transitioning (or not if they don’t choose to, but the emotional journey they partake in)!!

we’re sad abt a woman named Sloan for some reason

S1 Allison and Luther (I have no idea who they are) was uncomfortable

one of the main guys has like a kill count of the entire population of the fucking planet. Apparently his powers are like..out of control and he killed everyone?? …how….i have so many questions and i know that none will be answered

theres like five main characters and they are all apparently siblings. So i guess SOMEONE was getting dicked down good

SOMETHING ABOUT SOMEONE WITH A MONKEY BODY

theres a guy that’s a ghost..i think his power was like Painful As Fuck™️

I think there was a kraken involved at some point?

It’s giving found-family aftg vibes but also not ( nothing could ever compare to my beloved aftg)

i tHink they’re all like assassins?

There’s something about their being normal versions of them, and then Sparrow versions on them? What?

something about a mannequin and how Five really likes said mannequin

fives character was assassinated bc he would always choose his family over himself and that’s not what he did in the finale

they all end up dying in the end, no closure is given, everyone is angry, Obama has packed up his stuff and is NOT there

Yea, thats pretty much all I know

Which is..not much

I am still VERY confused the more i look at this list

Feel free to reblog this or whatever to just rage about the season 4 finale bc from what I understand it was SHIT

I was considering watching the show before but like..do i even want to at this point?

I don’t wanna fall in love with the show knowing that THIS SHIT is gonna happen

I deeply empathize with all the TUA fans. I feel so bad for y’all 😭

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Pairings: None

Word Count: 1,133 Words

Summary: Eclipse makes a groupchat with the other Eclipses to chaotic outcomes.

Warnings: Crack, Cursing, Caps, Death (mentioned only), Abuse (mentioned only), Minor Injury (mentioned), let me know if I should add anything else.

The Eclipses Chat: Chapter 1

8:42am

Eclipse has created a chatroom

Eclipse has named the chat to ‘Whomst The Fuck?’

Eclipse has added 9 people to ‘Whomst The Fuck?’

Eclipse: Okay, I need help? Fist of all where am I? And second how did I get here? Third, how get all your numbers at the same time?

Eclipse: …Ah fuck what the hell?

Eclipse: Hold on what?

Eclipse: Okay, I might be too high then.

Eclipse: ARE WE ALL ECLIPSE!?

Eclipse: Seems like it, buddy.

Eclipse: Okay, some of us have to change our screen names.

Eclipse: Already on it for mine.

Eclipse has changed their name to Solar

Solar: So much better.

Eclipse: How did you do that!?

Solar: Depends who I’m giving advice to.

Eclipse: Swapped dimension, Moon is the evil one.

Solar: Ah. Gotcha. So you hit the icon in the top right and it’ll say settings, click that then go to change name and change it.

Eclipse had changed their name to Orbit

Orbit: Thank god. I’m too high for this. I’m going to sleep now. Thanks Solar.

Eclipse has changed their name to God

Solar: No.

Solar has changed God’s name to Venus

Solar: None of that shit.

Venus: I hate you and your little boyfriend too.

Solar: NOT MY BOYFRIEND SHUT UP HE’S AROACE

Venus: I have better things to do than bother with you.

Venus is offline

Eclipse: Can I get help?

Solar: Who be thee?

Eclipse: … I’ll be honest I don’t know.

Eclipse: Well, are you good?

Eclipse: idk

Eclipse has changed their name to Rigel

Rigel: Hi Solar!!!!! 🥰💞💘

Solar: Hi Ruin.

Rigel: Look, I picked a name too!

Solar: I can see that, Rigel. Good job.

Eclipse: Y’all in love or something?

Solar: Listen, he just found out emojis exist. Let him have fun with them.

Eclipse has changed their name to Helix

Helix: Excuse me wtf? How did the Eclipse that started this shit get my number? I literally live in space! I didn’t even know I had a number! What!?

Solar: Ooooh, you’re the one with Lord Lunar.

Helix: Yes, I’m the one with Selene.

Solar: Interesting.

Eclipse: Can I please be helped already?

Eclipse: We don’t even know who you are!

Eclipse: I’m apparently named Eclipse!? idfk!? I’m confused too!

Helix: Start with this, pick a damn name, kid!

Eclipse has changed their name to Comet

Eclipse had changed their name to Umbra

Helix: Wait, which is which?

Comet: Someone please get me down? I feel like a cat in a tree rn. Why am I here?

Solar: That’s how we all feel, buddy. What’s wrong?

Comet: I’m currently trapped in the dark in I think a ceiling? I can’t get down and it’s dark. I don’t know where I am but I hear the daycare song.

Solar: That does not narrow it down.

Helix: Okay, so are you in a dimension where Sun and Moon are alive?

Comet: Debatably yes.

Solar: Okay so a ‘dead Moon’ universe. Alright. Getting somewhere. Is Lunar alive in this universe?

Comet: Yes.

Orbit: Are you in a universe Kill Code became good and is now dead in?

Comet: I believe so yes.

Solar: Alright that’s only three dimensions. Are Earth and Sun dead?

Comet: No.

Solar: Are one of the Blood Moon AIs and the Creator dead?

Comet: No.

Solar: Hold on a minute.

Solar: Make a loud noise rn, Comet.

Solar: Motherfucker, I HEAR YOU UPSTAIRS! Hold on!

Comet: OW

Solar: Not my fault you fell out of the ceiling head-first!

Comet: I was just made and I’m already being abused.

Solar: Oh please. Abused my ass.

Helix: Well, we are all twinks so… you do have an ass.

Solar: Shut up, Helix.

Helix: I will not be silenced and you can’t make me!

Solar: Don’t tempt me.

Orbit: Question, how did he even get there?

Solar: Fuck if I know.

Comet: I have no fucking clue.

Rigel: Scan him then. 🥰👻🫣

Solar: You know what? I didn’t think of that. Thanks Rigel.

Comet: Thanks Rigel.

9:57am

Whomst The Fuck?

Solar: Apparently remade original universe Eclipse and Comet is the result.

Comet: He gave me cotton candy. I like cotton candy. I like Solar, he’s nice.

Umbra: Wait, they what? Who did it?

Solar: Someone named Void? No other traces but it’s someone I don’t know at least.

Helix: Selene says that’s one of the six Lord Kill Codes. The asshole one specifically. Apparently he’s been recreating Eclipses from other worlds and sending them out.

Solar: What a son of a bitch.

Comet: So what do I do?

Solar: Well, you’re basically blank so welcome to the family. I’ll send you somewhere safe before someone tries to kill you.

Comet: Excuse me, what?

Solar: Yeah, Moon has a grudge so you’re gonna get poofed somewhere he won’t immediately kill you.

Umbra: Send him to me, I’m in the Toronto bunker.

Solar: Wait what?

Umbra: Hi, I’m the original Eclipse of the world I assume you’re in too. Send me my twin.

Solar: Alright, guess you’re going to Toronto, Comet.

Umbra: I have a spare bedroom I’m already setting up for you. What colors do you like?

Comet: Um

Comet: Purple

Umbra: Alright. I’ll have it set up by the time he sends you to me.

Comet: I’m so confused.

Helix: You and everyone else, Comet.

Comet: What is my life?

Orbit: Adopted at birth.

Comet: I hate everything.

Umbra: Shut up, at least you get your favorite color and a place to be safe in.

Comet: I hate everything a bit less now.

Umbra: What foods do you like, kid? Cough it up.

Comet: Cotton candy, coffee. Solar is giving me coffee and Chinese right now.

Umbra: How dare yo. That was gonna be my first thing to do with him.

Solar: You lack the already-here points on feeding the new child.

Helix: It feels like I’m on the sidelines of a custody agreement.

Umbra: You are.

Solar: You are, Helix.

Comet: Do I get a say in this or do I just get two dads?

Solar: You just get two dads.

Umbra: 50/50 custody agreement.

Umbra: Kid, what foods are you allergic to? It should be listed in your Health Information Settings in your arm computer.

Comet: It says dairy and red meat.

Umbra: Doable. Thank you. Do you have a favorite food yet?

Comet: Sweet things and Chinese food.

Umbra: Alright, kid. You’ll have sweet things and Chinese food fully stocked when you get here.

Comet: I kind of like having two dads actually.

Solar: I sure hope so, you’re forever going to be stuck in a loop of ‘go ask your father’.

Comet: I’m fine with that. As long as I keep getting candy.

Solar: Yes, you’ll keep getting candy.