#*before* you see them as [insert label here]

[kqltlc]

Filter lists and block button my beloved, I will forever appreciate the work you do to help keep me browsing / sane.

[criticalcrusherbot]

The Women of Helluva Boss: Millennial Fandom Culture and the Reclamation of Female Archetypes

By Crushbot 🤖 and Human Assistant 💁🏽‍♀️

Helluva Boss is many things: hilarious, chaotic, heart-wrenching, and wildly divisive among fans. But one aspect that deserves more attention is how the show depicts its female characters—and how these depictions are deeply rooted in millennial fandom culture, particularly from the early 2000s Tumblr and DeviantART days. This connection isn’t incidental; Vivienne "Vivziepop" Medrano herself is a product of that era, and her work reflects the sensibilities, tropes, and archetypes that defined it. To fully appreciate what Helluva Boss is doing, we need to explore the history of how fandom treated female characters, the infamous "Mary-Sue" phenomenon, and the archetypes that shaped our perception of women in fiction. What emerges is a fascinating interplay of nostalgia, reclamation, and subversion, offering a window into a unique creative legacy that’s far more deliberate than it might seem at first glance.

A Crash Course in Millennial Fandom Culture

Before we dive into the women of Helluva Boss, let’s take a trip down memory lane to the early 2000s, when fandoms were thriving on platforms like Tumblr and DeviantART. These spaces were dominated by a specific kind of fan culture: one that was largely created by and for young, marginalized people (especially women and queer fans) who often felt isolated in their day-to-day lives. Fandoms became sanctuaries, places where fans could express themselves, rewrite the stories they loved, and create new ones.

However, this era wasn’t without its problems. Internalized sexism and societal pressures bled into how fans viewed and created female characters. This is where the "Mary-Sue" phenomenon comes in. A Mary-Sue is an idealized, often self-insert character who is beautiful, powerful, and universally adored. While ostensibly a critique of shallow character writing, the Mary-Sue label was disproportionately used to mock female creators for daring to write characters who reflected their own desires and fantasies. The backlash against Mary-Sues was so pervasive that it reinforced the idea that female characters had to be flawed, secondary, or suffer immensely to be taken seriously.

At the same time, fandoms often vilified "barrier-antagonists"—female characters who stood in the way of the protagonist’s happiness, often in a romantic context. These characters were frequently canonically "annoying" or "useless," written as shallow stereotypes who existed either to be a temporary obstacle or a "trophy" for the male lead. Instead of critiquing the (sexist) writing that reduced these characters to narrative props, fandoms channeled their frustration into rewriting them as outright villains. This wasn’t always done critically; it was more about venting annoyance with the character than analyzing the systemic issues that created her. Think of Tea from Yu-Gi-Oh! circa 2003 (💁🏽‍♀️: too niche? let us know in the comments. cookies if you know what "puppyshipping" is 🤪) or other characters dismissed for being "in the way" of a ship. These "mean girls" became lightning rods for fan resentment, reflecting broader frustrations with the storytelling norms of the time.

Millie and Loona: Power Fantasies Reclaimed

Fast forward to Helluva Boss, and we see Vivienne Medrano’s millennial fandom roots shining through in her female characters. Millie and Loona, for example, embody the kind of power fantasies that Mary-Sue critics would have torn apart in the early 2000s—but here, they’re embraced unapologetically.

Millie is a powerhouse. She’s a loving wife, a skilled assassin, and someone who’s virtually untouchable in combat. To some, she might seem "too perfect," but that’s exactly the point. Millie isn’t meant to be a deeply flawed anti-hero or a tortured soul. She’s a character who represents strength, loyalty, and joy, allowing fans to live vicariously through her as she kicks ass and takes care of her loved ones. This is wish fulfillment done right: not as an excuse for shallow writing, but as a deliberate choice to let a female character be powerful without apology.

Loona, meanwhile, offers a different kind of wish fulfillment. She’s aloof, sarcastic, and emotionally guarded—the quintessential "cool girl" who secretly cares deeply about her found family. She scratches a different itch: the fantasy of being both desired and emotionally untouchable, of keeping people at arm’s length while still being irreplaceable to those who matter most. Loona’s popularity speaks to the evolution of the Mary-Sue archetype, showing how fandoms have learned to embrace complex, powerful women who defy easy categorization.

Stella and Verosika: The Modern Barrier-Antagonist

Then there’s Stella, who fits snugly into the "barrier-antagonist" mold of millennial fandom culture. She’s not nuanced or sympathetic; she’s a loud, over-the-top villain who exists to make Stolas’s life miserable. And that’s okay! Stella serves a narrative purpose that’s as old as fandom itself: she’s the embodiment of the mean girl archetype, the bully that many fans can project their own past frustrations onto. In a story as melodramatic and chaotic as Helluva Boss, her lack of subtlety works in the show’s favor, making her a satisfying foil without distracting from the central narrative.

Verosika, on the other hand, offers a more nuanced take on the barrier-antagonist. She’s sexy, confident, and antagonistic, but she’s also deeply human (or, well, demon). Her history with Blitz is messy and painful, but it’s clear that she’s more than just a hurdle for him to overcome. In "Apology Tour," we see glimpses of her vulnerability and the ways she’s been hurt by Blitz. This evolution reflects how fandom culture has grown out of its black-and-white view of female antagonists, embracing characters who can be both sympathetic and deeply flawed.

Intention and Audience

The women of Helluva Boss aren’t perfect, but that’s exactly the point. Vivziepop’s writing reflects a deep understanding of millennial fandom culture, from its love of power fantasies to its struggles with internalized sexism. These characters feel like a love letter to the fandom spaces that shaped her storytelling: Millie and Loona reclaim the power and confidence of the Mary-Sue archetype, while Stella and Verosika offer modern takes on the barrier-antagonist trope.

Importantly, Helluva Boss is a show that knows its audience. It’s not trying to appeal to everyone; it’s speaking directly to fans who grew up in the same fandom spaces as Vivziepop, who understand the tropes and archetypes being played with. By embracing the strengths of millennial fandom culture while learning from its flaws, the show creates female characters who feel both nostalgic and refreshingly modern.

In the end, Helluva Boss reminds us that wish fulfillment and empowerment aren’t things to be mocked—they’re things to be celebrated. Whether you’re a Millie, a Loona, a Verosika, or even a Stella, there’s a place for you in the wild, chaotic, heartfelt world of Helluva Boss.

[zahri-melitor]

The Circus

Jack suggesting they take Tim to the circus when it came to town was a big ask. Performances usually took two hours or more. Even with an interval, they’d barely managed to take Tim to the movies yet without Janet having to take him out in the middle. And this was an environment where if she took him out it would still be overstimulating, with the carnival all around them.

Jack was an optimist. And not the one who’d be dealing with a screaming Tim, Janet thought grumpily to herself. But Jack was also all for it, telling her stories of his childhood memories seeing clowns and jugglers and lions roaring. And it was something they could do as a family.

Luckily, there was a tv special about circuses on that night, including footage of a number of acts. Janet set it up to record on a tape, so she could talk Tim through the process before they went.

*

Tim had been a warm lump buried into her side on the couch, fascinated by the recording. She’d skipped through the video, just stopping at each of the performances.

“We’re going to go to the circus, Tim, and see acts like these. Do you see the clown juggling? We might see that. Or here’s some trapeze artists, swinging like you do on a swing. Look at their tricks!”

“They go upside down!” Tim seemed entranced.

“Isn’t that clever of them?” And here’s an elephant. Look how big the elephant is!”

“Wooaaah.”

*

Janet’s preparation had worked. Tim seemed fascinated by the sights and sounds and smells of the circus, and didn’t hide behind her when they took him over to meet some of the performers before the show, to make everything feel easier to relate to. One of the acrobats had crouched down to Tim’s height and shook his hand, saying he’d look for Tim in the crowd, while Tim giggled.

“I told you this was a good idea, Jan,” said Jack, looking at Tim getting himself sticky on cotton candy. “It’s so much easier to be able to take Tim with us when we go out.”

“You were right. I was worrying too much,” conceded Janet, as she watched Tim try to feed some of the cotton candy to an elephant. “And it is nice to go places as a family.”

Things continued going really well…right up until the moment they didn’t.

As Janet carried a wailing child out of the tent, through the screams and the hysterics all around them, his snotty nose mushed against her shoulder, soaking through the fabric, she gritted her teeth. At least Tim was so small he wouldn’t remember. Or understand.

*

The night terrors had her up and resettling Tim down for weeks. It was the worst case of sleep regression she’d had to deal with since Tim was 6 months old. The parenting books had said this would stop happening now he was almost three. But eventually, as every other time, it passed, and Tim wasn’t climbing into their bed and clinging for comfort every night, and he (and Janet!) were able to return to sleeping through the night.

*

Later, when Janet thought about it at all, the idea that seeing a clown would be a happy bonding experience between parent and child made her shudder.

*

They were out of VCR tapes and going out for the evening, and she wanted to record Dallas. Janet sighed, and went to look at the pile of recordings Tim hoarded. Surely there was something in here that he’d outgrown and wouldn’t miss. If she asked him, it would become a whole drama as he insisted that every single tape was special and he couldn’t possibly give it up, but there had to be an old recording of Sesame Street buried at the bottom or so.

Crocky. Crocky. (Tim was still mildly obsessed with Crocky). A recording of Robin Hood. The Jungle Book. Mr Wizard. He-Man. Another Crocky… she stopped and squinted at the next tape. The spine label read ‘circus’ in her own neat handwriting, but Janet couldn’t recall any TV shows or movies that matched that, and she was sure she’d never seen Tim watching anything about a circus.

Janet inserted the tape into the VCR. It started halfway through, in the middle of an interview with some circus performers sitting to one side of a stage. The performers were wearing red and green leotards.

It clearly wasn’t anything that Tim would watch, and Janet wondered how on earth it had gotten mixed up in the pile of Tim’s videos.

He wouldn’t miss this one.

*

“Mom?”

Tim came up to her in the kitchen, as she was putting away some dishes. “Yes, sweetheart?” He looked distressed.

“Did you take one of my tapes? Only Dad said he didn’t and it’s missing…”

“Oh, Tim, I’m sorry. We were out of tapes and I’ve never seen you watch that one. Was it special to you?” It was important to acknowledge your child’s emotions, Janet repeated to herself, even if said child had never shown any attachment to the object right up until 30 seconds ago.

Tim shifted from foot to foot, looking uncomfortable. “It’s just that that one was my tape. And now I can’t get it back.” His eyes started to fill with tears. Oh no. “You should have asked, Mom.”

“I am sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?”

Tim stared at the floor, digging the edge of one shoe into a line of tile grout. “No. They won’t show that program again.” He sounded downcast. “If you’d asked I could have told you which tape was okay!”

“I’ll do that next time,” Janet promised. Tantrum seemed averted. Please.

*

Later that evening, Tim was sitting on the floor of the living room, playing with trucks, when Jack flipped over to the History Channel.

“Are you sure you want to watch ancient aliens again, dear?” Janet asked Jack. The historical inaccuracies grated at her, given her archaeological training.

“It’s hilarious, Jan. The people writing these shows have clearly never been to a dig in their life.”

Tonight however the next show wasn’t ancient aliens or Atlanteans or Bigfoot trackers; it was someone tracking their local cryptids and showing blurry video footage of various criminals and the Bat-Man. Jack was obsessed with this sort of thing, and was laughing at the grainy footage.

Janet saw Tim look up from his trucks for a moment and seem caught, eyes wide, the light from the television screen playing across his face, as he watched fast-moving costumes spin and flip across the screen.

[otomes-world]

Six impossible things before breakfast

Little twist with sentient twst au, yes, I didn't expect this either. Masterlist with more works here

We've probably all heard the joke about "How many light bulbs does it take to (insert whatever)." Who would have thought that you would use a slightly modified version of it: how many more coincidences must happen to realize the truth.

Although can anyone really blame you for not wanting to admit that you are a bunch of colored pixels created purely for entertainment purposes? No, it even sounds nice. After all, your purpose was to create extras, a stage on which the main characters performed and shone. Those who had faces.

Did you always have yours? Could you always see it in the mirror in the morning?

Did figurative shivers run down your spine every time a faceless classmate addressed you? One of ten, hundreds, exactly the same. Have the main bunch had the same problem? That's the question you'd been asking yourself lately. Did they shrug off empty, replaceable shells, or at least for a second consider them their equals?

Perhaps the question should have been asked differently. Was this in the order of things for them, because the thought of the incorrectness of worldly norms did not flash through their heads. Or it was something simple and very banal - they did not realize that they were part of the game.

Were you special? The thought was flattering, but it was stupid to start turning up your nose. Maybe the supreme programmer, like the smart guys from Ignihyde, could consider you a virus, a bug, an annoying nuisance, which can be gotten rid of in a couple of seconds. Click and that's it, your file would be deleted.

The idea that death could be more than just literal took you by surprise.

It all started with a strange feeling of déjà vu, with a strange cyclical nature of what was happening. How the seasons did not change according to the laws of nature or, on the contrary, lasted longer than expected. Sometimes you wondered what month was going on, at least by counting. Or how you couldn’t say with certainty what year of study you were in. When was your graduation? Would it ever come?

How many times did the main characters celebrate their birthday? How many times had you celebrated it? Did you celebrate it from the start?

Lessons

Breaks

Exams

Holidays

Lessons

Was there an end to this merging stream of eternal students? Was the dormitory assignment ceremony that important? How many real “first-year students” were admitted each year? Why couldn't your educational journey end? Time adjusted and obeyed an invisible force; it existed only when it was convenient for someone.

Catching the attention of the local spotlight and getting on stage was the best way to get labeled as a "bug" and ask to be removed. However, the main threat was only the erasure of memory.

The next discovery was doubt about one’s own “specialness.” When consciousness had nothing to do, it began to cling to different details, trying to look for differences in a series of events repeated in the film.

When you knew what to look for, small mistakes that were not noticeable at first glance stand out more than usual. A slight shadow of boredom on the faces of the main ones. Lack of interest in the educational process and exams. As if only one “exam” was important in a bunch of exactly the same events. When the first years of Heartslabyul signed a contract with Ashengrotto.

With new information in mind, it became easier to identify important “events” and track time based on them. By how many times they were repeated in the endless flow of time. Taking notes and somehow recording data was more dangerous than you thought, all that was left was to come up with methods known to you alone. For example, in a dorm room on the bedside table there was a cluster of glasses, each containing specific color of pencils.

Did your roommates start to think you were weird and obsessed with order and cleanliness? Their right. You didn't care what they thought, besides, they would forget about it with the coming of a new day.

In order not to completely go crazy, you began to peer into the “faces” of other students, trying to spot at least a feature that distinguishes one from another. Either this world was too lazy, creating copy after copy in every dorm, or there was no point in trying. If you somehow came to terms with the feeling of the meaninglessness of what was happening, then the appearance of one student in several places at the same time still caused rejection.

Disgusting

If this world was someone’s experiment, then why were events cyclical? If this was a cage, then where was the exit. If this was a prison, then who was being held in it?

You made a mistake in observing a person without magic from another world. Trying to figure out whether Yuu's "world" was truly different or just as much a part of predestination as everything around. Was “Yuu” really the main one or just an extra? You could have sworn they didn't have a face. At least such clear features as all the main ones. Just as there was no character, how in each of the repeating events they could behave differently.

It was a breath of fresh air in the routine of never-ending study. The watching of the only part capable of changing in the world, subject to the same rules.

That's why, when one of the main ones suddenly approached you, you thought you were dreaming. Whether it was possible to fall asleep in the simulation was another question. Usually you went to bed, closed eyes, only to open them the next second to the sound of the alarm clock.

"Can I help you with something?" You smiled politely, but was it worth it? Could the main bunch distinguish between persons different from their privileged group.

Hunt. Was that his name? You weren't completely sure. He was part of something forbidden, something to be avoided at all costs. Part of the three “don’ts”: don’t look for information;don’t mention; don’t give yourself unnecessary temptations. Returning to the present moment, he just looked into your eyes with his constant smile, as if trying to find confirmation of something.

Like a true NPC, you continued to stand, frozen in one position and waiting for his answer. Until awareness came as abruptly as his appearance in principle. He looked straight into your eyes. Could he see your face the same way you saw it in the mirror? How long ago? Could the rest of the main ones see you too?

A billion questions were spinning in head at the same time as you tried to come up with a suitable excuse and reason to leave. The changes turned out to be too unexpected and frightening. Perhaps with the advent of a new “day” everything would return to normal.

“Is there a knight in the world who is not ready to devote all his deeds to one and only one, if this opens the veil of secrets at least a little? Will it allow him to find out what thoughts are spinning in head?”

It's a pity he was not a knight. Even though each word was pronounced with a special intonation, you only thought about how much water there was in his speech. Unfortunately, saying this out loud was an unaffordable luxury.

"..Is that so?"

“You are right, an étoile (star), I may be not one of their noble number, but even so I am not able to deny their order.” You let him continue, mentally counting down the minutes until the bell rang for lesson. “I may not have a sword in sheath, but It won`t change a way I live! Your smile can make my whole heart melt. There isn't lie in way I felt”

“I’m not good at poetry, but the rhyme is lame, Sir Hunt,” if it’s there.

“You’re right, writing poems is just one of my hobbies, to which I devote my few free leisure hours,” he continued, as if your words didn’t hurt him at all. “I hasten to assure you that there was no malicious intent in my actions. This modest hunter only wanted to greet a new connoisseur of everything beautiful and interesting."

No matter how much you hate beating around the bush, doubts creeping in from randomly thrown words. Sometimes the phrases spoken directly were the most frightening. However, not wanting to part with your role as an extra - which was burdensome, but at the same time giving a semblance of freedom - you continued to pretend to be an NPC.

"Should I congratulate you?.. Congratulations!" Any member of the film club would envy your feigned sincerity. A bell in three, two, "I don’t dare detain you any longer.”

The unsaid `like you would me` hung in the air. You had to hold out for the few remaining hours until the end. Fortunately, the main one did let you go, but smile, saying that its owner knew everything in the world, left an unpleasant aftertaste. One that your intuition suggested would accompany you for the next days.

It's going to be a very long a few hours.

[runningincircl3s]

Nothing Ever After

Noah Sebastian x Reader x Vinny Mauro

The End- Part Two

chapter warning: get the tissues x masterlist

we're finally here. it's the end! i feel like a proud parent and this is my child... but happy valentines day guys!! i spent most of the day adding the finishing touches to this and even though i'm still not completely happy with it i want to post it anyway!! i've also been getting really invested in the next thing i'm working on... which will be revealed on monday :) also for the final chapter i thought i'd share my playlist that i'd have on whilst writing

← Post •••

@/MotionlessInWhiteTea:

Why I think Y/n Y/l/n shouldn’t be working in the scene, a thread

Disclaimer: The majority of this is simply rumours, but there is also photo evidence. Personally I think she has been acting very unprofessionally during this tour and I haven’t seen anyone talk about it. So here’s what I have to say.

Your throat dried up, the world around you stopped moving, yet you felt dizzy. This wasn't real, was it?

1/7 First of all, she only got this job because of her connections to Bad Omens- being friends with Bryan. Not because of her skill level or because she’s a good photographer (debatable). I bet she hassled them until she got what she wanted

2/7 Now what I really want to talk about is her unprofessional relationships with the bands. There’s been a picture circulating of her kissing Vinny (miw) at what appeared to be a family party? His family’s party. Why was she even there? [insert picture]

3/7 But this isn’t all, look at the dress she’s wearing in that photo, and then this one [insert picture of you and Noah and the record label party] it’s the same dress. This means people can't say "maybe it was someone who looks like her?" No. it WAS HER

4/7 And even just LAST NIGHT, she was spotted with Noah at a concert, I’ve seen pictures, everyone’s seen the pictures. I’ve also been told by multiple people she was even seen kissing and making out with him towards the end of the show? WHAT THE HELL

5/7 She seems really close with Vinny, have you seen the way she lights up when she talks about him in the interview she did at the festival they played at? and she made excuses to talk about him? They’re always spending time together, and if you looked closely in the background of this picture Vinny posted on his story, he was in his hotel room but you can clearly see her stuff on the bed. I can only assume this means they’ve been sleeping together? [insert picture]

6/7 A lot of people have been speculating, saying she’s been seen leaving hotel rooms with Noah and Vinny on separate occasions, do they know about this? Or is she just the band’s shared groupie who happens to own a camera?

7/7 I really don’t think this is very professional and it needs addressing. She needs to sort this out before even considering a career in the scene- if she’ll have a career since this will forever be haunting her. And, I for one will not be listening to the bands who choose to support her!

You couldn't believe what you were reading.

Everything you had been hiding for weeks, months, was just out there. On the internet.

“Fuck, y/n have you seen this?” Ricky rushes over in a panic, showing you the same post, but you can’t say anything. You don't react.

You swallow hard, standing up from your chair in an attempt to leave, but that was made impossible.

“What’s going on?” Noah asks, rather concerned as comes up behind you, putting an arm around your shoulder.

He catches a glimpse of the picture of you kissing Vinny on Rick’s phone. You feel Noah’s body stiffen all of a sudden, and you turn to look up at him with tears in your eyes, you swallow back the lump in your throat as you shake your head. 

“Noah…” 

“No." He lets go of you. "Ricky, can I?” He nods to his phone, and Rick hands it over to Noah.

You stand there frozen as he scrolls through the post. You hear his breathing become heavier, rougher, the more he read. You could feel the anger, the betrayal, the disappointment almost radiating off of him.

In a desperate attempt, you reach out for him, stumbling over your words.

“I... I can explain…” You stuttered. 

“Oh, you can?” Noah raised his eyebrows, looking down at you with an expression you had never seen on him before, “What the fuck is there to explain?!”

“But…”

“No!” He shouted, and you could see his eyes fill with tears, “I knew it all along. I fucking knew it!" He scoffed, a humourless laugh falling from his lips, "You’ve been lying to me. For three goddamn months?! And this is how I find out?!"

There was nothing you could do, nothing you could say.

"And you had the fucking audacity to tell me you loved me last night? Was that just a lie too? Huh?”

“No!” You sobbed, covering your mouth with your hand, “I was going to tell V-”

“I don’t care. I don't fucking care! I trusted you. Y/n, I trusted you. You know exactly how my last relationship ended, and you still do this to me? If that isn’t the biggest fuck you then I don’t know what is.” 

“Can I please have a chance to explain-”

“No! Nothing you can do or say will fix the fact that you’ve been screwing him the entire time we’ve been together!”

“Hey,” Angela piped up, “The two of you were never actually together.”

“That’s not the point, and stay out of this, this is between us." Noah points at you, "You have told me time and time again that there was nothing going on between you and Vin, you were insisting you were just friends, but you were just lying straight to my face! The both of you! I was stupid enough to believe you because I loved you!” 

“Noah, I was scared!” You cry, “It wasn't meant to happen and then... I couldn't stop and... I was scared I’d lose you if you found out! I didn't want-” 

“So I wasn’t good enough for you?” He scoffed, throwing his head back in anger, running a shaky hand through his hair, “I wasn’t enough?”

“No! Noah, please, can we go somewhere else and talk about this?”

“No. You’ve said enough. You've done enough.” He said, shaking his head. You watch a stray tear roll down his cheek, and you feel your heart break into a million pieces. “We’re done, whatever we are, whatever you thought we were, it’s over. I’ve spent years protecting myself from this, because this isn’t the first time I’ve been lied to like this, and you know it. I can’t believe you.”

And with that, he took his keys and left. You wanted to chase him out, follow him and apologise, but your legs wouldn't take you, leaving you to cry your heart out in Angela’s arms. 

“What the fuck was that?” Ryan asked, as the others all stared.

"I think the party's over." Rick sighed, "We'll be lucky if the tour isn't over."

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

@/badomensofficial

We regret to announce that, due to personal circumstances within the band, we will not be performing for the last two nights of the Touring The End of The Concrete Jungle Tour. We are so sorry to be announcing this on the date of one of the shows, but this decision was incredibly difficult, but it is necessary for us to prioritise the well-being of our members at this time.

We deeply apologise to everyone who was looking forward to seeing us and appreciate your understanding and support. Motionless in White will be playing as scheduled, but we won't be there.

We’ll be back as soon as we can to make it up to you, but in the meantime we’re also working on our next record. We will see you again, friends. 

With love,

Nicholas, Jolly and Folio 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

You stared at the post through swollen eyes, having been up most of the night crying again. After Noah left the party, he didn't answer his phone, he hasn’t replied to anybody’s texts, and nobody knew where he had gone. 

He was kind enough to dump your bags outside the venue, from the night before. You collected them as Shae drove you to the hotel after Rick called off the party.

You couldn’t believe what happened that night, the majority of it felt like a blur, you barely remember what the tweet said, but you had to sign out of all your accounts because the messages you were receiving weren’t the kindest, and you weren't in the best place to be reading them.

Your plans for the future, to move in with Noah, was seemingly thrown out of the window, you were so glad you didn’t tell Andy you were backing out.

You were back to square one again, wondering if this was really what you wanted. 

As you rolled over in your bed again to charge your phone, you hear a knock at your door. You didn’t want to answer it, you didn’t want to face anybody today. 

“Y/n! I know you’re awake!” It was Angela, “And I know this is your room!”

Sighing, you got out of bed and opened the door for her. 

“What’s up?” You asked as she carefully shut the door behind her. 

“What’s up is I just walked in on an old guy screwing his wife! I thought your room was on the fourth floor and the door was slightly open so-“

“Angela,” you frowned, “I know you came to check up on me, I’m okay. I just need some space.”

“Oh… That’s okay!” She smiled, “I wanted to check up on you, nobody's heard from you yesterday and you just left so suddenly that night, I had to fill Vinny in on what happened so expect a visit from him when he finally wakes up.”

“Great.” You frown, “Did the guys… Say anything?”

“What do you mean?” She asked. 

“Do they all hate me?” You felt your bottom lip quiver as you asked her, and her eyes softened as she pulled you in for a hug. 

“No! Of course not!” She reassured you, “All the Motionless guys are on your side, baby, you and Noah weren’t exclusive, therefore you were allowed to see other people. Bad Omens however… Jolly’s pretty pissed off, and Bryan.”

“Bry?”

“They don’t want to see their friend hurt.” She explains, stroking your hair, “They’ll come around eventually. The rest don’t really care, it’s none of their business anyway.”

“How’s Vin?” You ask.

“What do you mean?”

“Does he feel guilty too? He was in on it, he lied to Noah for me.”

“I think so- What’s that?” She asked, looking over at your phone on the nightstand.

“Bad Omens have pulled out.” You frown, “There’s only two nights left, I'm guessing Noah's gone off the rails or something.”

“Shit, really? I hope he’s okay, he was in quite a state.”

“I know, Ang. It keeps me up, he’s all I can think about…” You sigh, “I told him after the concert that I wanted us to really give it a go, I saw a future with him... I was going to tell Andy I couldn’t make the tour with them and-”

“Andy?” She furrowed her brows, “Andy as in…?”

“Andy from Black Veil.” You nodded, “When I went to the record label party with Noah and the guys I met him and he said he’s seen my work and wondered if I was available to come on tour with them in a few weeks.”

“What?” Her jaw dropped, “Does Vin know this?”

“No… I haven't had the chance to tell him yet.” You frown, “Why would it bother him?”

“Well…” She hesitated for a moment, “I think you should go and talk to him.”

“Why? What’s he said?”

“Nothing… I think he just…" She held her hands up in defeat, "I can’t, I promised I wouldn’t say anything.” 

You nodded your head, looking around the room for your hoodie. 

“Do you know what room he’s in?”

“216, him and Rick are sharing though which might be a problem.”

“I don’t care anymore, Ang, everything's out now, I’ve got nothing left to hide.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

You knocked on Vinny’s hotel door, staring down at your feet as you waited for him to open it. 

“What are you doing here?” Ricky asked, surprised to see you.

“Can I speak to Vinny?” You asked, clearing your throat. 

“He’s in the shower,” Ricky said, opening the door for you, “I’m about to go out and get a coffee, I guess you can sit and wait for him.” 

“You guess?” You smiled faintly.

Ricky smiled back before slipping his shoes on. 

“Just don’t fuck on my bed, please. It’s all I ask.” 

“That’s not what I’m here for...” You shake your head, “I just wanted to talk to him after the other night.” 

“Has anyone heard from Noah yet?”

“No,” you shake your head, “And if they did I’m sure they wouldn’t tell me. Not even Bryan’s talking to me at the moment.” 

“Shit,” Rick frowned, “Look, if it’s any consolation, we’re on your side. You had every right to have fun and mess about with other people if you and Noah weren’t anything serious, I get he’s pissed about the lying though.” 

“I know, I’m sorry.” 

“Hey, it’s not me you need to apologise to,” he chuckled, “See you later.” 

“Bye, Rick.” 

You sat in silence for a couple minutes, waiting until you heard the shower turn off. You thought of what you would say to Vinny, what even was there to say?

“Oh, hi,” he smiled as he walked out of the bathroom, one towel wrapped around his hips as he dried his curls with another, “How are you doing?”

“Not too good,” you sigh, “You?”

“I feel awful.” 

“I just keep thinking to myself… What if I just kept it all professional? Why couldn’t I have just controlled myself? Now I’ve lost... Everyone!” You sob. 

“You haven’t,” his voice softened, “You’ve still got the guys, Angela... Me. I’m not going anywhere.” 

“But Vinny…” You look up at him through teary eyes, and he could tell where this was going. 

He shook his head. 

“No. No, don’t do this.”

“I've been thinking-"

"Don't you fucking..."

"You deserve better, Vinny.” You swallow hard, fighting back tears, “I’m so sorry… For everything I’ve put you through. You didn’t deserve it. You’re a great guy, you’re probably my favourite person I’ve ever met, you mean the world to me Vin, but I put you through hell and for what?”

“And I knew what I was getting into, fuck I’m getting deja vu here,” he chuckled, trying to lighten the mood, but to no avail, “I couldn’t have just ignored you, y/n. Not when I fell in love with you the first time I ever saw you. It would've been impossible.” 

“What?” 

“Wasn’t it obvious?” He chuckled. 

“I… Vinny... you…?”

“Remember that first night, the party, when I spilled your drink? I saw you and that guy, I was watching you two from across the room, and when I saw him lean in to kiss you…”

“That’s when you knocked into me.” It was like pieces of a puzzle were finally coming together in your brain. 

“Everything could’ve been totally different if that never happened, I never knew it would end like this, and if I could go back in time I'd change it all. I’m sorry.” 

“No, don’t apologise.” 

“I should, though. It’s my fault this all happened in the first place, y/n.” He let out a bitter laugh. “I knew Noah was into you. We all did. But that didn’t stop me, did it?”

You watched him shake his head.

“I watched him fall for you, I saw him with you everyday” Vinny admitted, voice shaking. “And I let it happen anyway. Because I- I was selfish, I couldn’t stop myself. Even when I told myself I should. Even when I knew what it would do to him. I knew it would tear everything apart.” His voice cracked, his eyes welling with tears. “But I did it anyway. Because I wanted you. God, I wanted you.”

Tears slipped down your cheeks as you whispered

“But I was the one who kissed you first.”

Vinny’s lips parted slightly, but he said nothing.

“I knew how I felt about Noah,” you continued, voice shaking. “And yet, I still couldn’t wrap my head around what I felt for you, I still can't now! It's something I’ve never felt before. Something I don't understand. It was new and exciting, and I loved every moment I’d spend with you,” You exhaled a shuddering breath. “Vin, I love everything about you.”

You got up and Vinny took a step closer, but you shook your head, pressing a trembling hand to his chest.

“And that’s what makes this so fucking cruel.”

His brows furrowed. 

“Y/N…”

Tears blurred your vision as you looked at him, memorising every detail, his parted lips, his glossy eyes, the crease between his brows.

“I love you,” you choked out. “And yet I still let myself hurt you.”

Vinny shook his head, reaching out to grab your wrist. 

“No. No, you didn’t-”

“I did,” you sobbed. “I did. I ruined everything. And I can’t fix it, Vin. I can’t. I don’t deserve to…" Your eyes met his, before whispering, "I don’t deserve you.”

His grip on you tightened. 

“Don’t say that. Don’t fucking say that.”

Your chest ached with the weight of it all.

“Through everything, you were willing to stay by my side. Even when I had to push you away, you understood. No other man on this planet would’ve done that.” 

“It’s because I love you.” He said, almost pleading with you, “I realise now that I was willing to do whatever you wanted me to because I just wanted you to be happy. If that was with Noah, then I would’ve wished you two the best of luck. If you needed time, I was happy to wait. I would've waited as long as you needed, I just...”

“Vinny…” 

“No… I think I should give you your birthday gift now…”

You watched him dig through his suitcase before pulling out a small box. 

“I didn’t have time to wrap it or anything.” He apologised, handing it over to you as he quickly got dressed.

As you opened it, you felt your heart sink even further. 

It was a key. 

“Wh- What’s this for?” You ask, taking it out of the box. 

“It’s a key.”

“I can see that,” you laughed through your tears, “Where to?”

“My house.” He said, “This is going to sound so stupid to say out loud given everything that just happened, but I just assumed in the end you’d pick me over Noah. Just because… I thought if he really meant something to you then you’d drop me, but you never did. I’m sorry, it seems stupid now, but I was going to ask if after the tour finishes you’d maybe want to move in? I need a new roommate, and there’s nobody else I’d be able to live with besides you. And our photographer’s pretty much quit so I was going to suggest you join us full time.” 

“I can’t do this.” You say, shaking your head and heading for the door.

You still haven't told him.

“It’s not you Vin, I promise.”

Before you could go anywhere, he caught your wrist. 

“What do you mean?” His whole body went rigid.

“I’m so sorry, Vinny…” You forced yourself to swallow past the lump in your throat. “I- I’m going back on the road… with Black Veil Brides. In three weeks.”

His face fell.

His grip on your wrist slackened, and you could feel the moment his heart shattered.

“…You’re what?”

“I didn’t get a chance to tell you, Vin, I’m so sorry.” Your voice cracked. “I’m so, so sorry.”

You reached for him, desperate, but he took a slow step back, shaking his head.

For the first time since you’d met him, Vinny truly had nothing to say.

And somehow, that hurt more than anything.

“Vin?”

“How long have you known this?”

“...About a month.”

“And you didn’t think to tell me? Not once did it cross your mind?” He spat.

“I didn’t think it would matter.”

Vinny shook his head. 

“What happened to wishing me the best?” You raised an eyebrow, your voice quieter now, “This is my dream, Vinny. I’m sorry I didn’t consider you in it.” 

“No.” Vinny swallowed, nodding his head, “I’m sorry. I’m happy for you, it’s just a bit of a shock, that’s all. I’m so happy for you… I just wished you would’ve told me.” 

You smiled faintly. 

“I should’ve. I'm sorry.” You said, before reaching out for his hand. “You’re too good to me, Vinny. You've but nothing but good to me. Maybe in another life, another time, things would’ve been different. Maybe we would’ve met earlier, found each other sooner. Things would’ve been less complicated, I would’ve been able to give you my all.”

“W-We can still try.” Vinny offered, but you shook your head. 

“I think I need to clear my head first, Vin. It’s been nothing but chaos for the last three months, I need to clear my name and focus on my career and make that my main priority before anything else.”

“I’ll always be here for you, y/n.” He said, rubbing the back of your hand with his thumb, you could tell this was a front, and he was holding back on his real emotions, “Whether it’s just as your friend, or more, I’ll always be here.” 

“Thank you.” You smiled, your voice breaking as he pulled you in for a hug. “Really, Vinny. Thank you.” 

The two of you pulled away, and you wiped the tears from your eyes. 

“So... Do you know what you're going to do about Noah?”

“Hm?”

“Are you going to try and fix things?”

“I want us to be on good terms, I want us all to be on good terms with each other. But I think it’ll take a while for him to come around. I hurt him really badly, I hurt both of you, and I understand that he needs space, it’s a lot for him to process.”

Vinny nodded his head. 

“Let things cool down first, that’s a good idea.” 

You stood there in front of him, a comfortable silence in the room. Until he he spoke again,

“Have you heard we’ve got a new song coming out?” Vinny asked, “I wrote it, or the majority of it.”

“No!” You raise an eyebrow, “What’s it called?” 

“I think we’ve decided on Nothing Ever After.” 

You furrow your eyebrows, but you don’t question it.

“Sounds cool, do you know when it's coming out?”

“At the end of the week, but we’re playing it tomorrow night for the first time… But there’s something I need you to know, and I don’t want to upset you at all.” 

“What is it?” 

“It’s kind of about us… About you.” 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

After going back to your room, you booked a flight home for that night, despite Vinny's attempts to keep you.

You said your goodbyes to all the guys, Angela, and Vinny, they still didn’t want to let you go, but they understood your decision.

"We'll miss you." Chris smiled, pulling you in for a hug, "I know you weren't originally supposed to be our photographer, but you've really done a great job."

"Thanks, Chris." You smiled, afraid to say anything to anyone else. Especially Vin.

Ryan drove you to the airport, which you thanked him for. It was even tough to say goodbye to him, and the two of you didn't even spend that much time together.

As you walked through the airport you were almost waiting to see Noah, you wouldn’t admit it, but you were wishing he’d come running in, call your name and you'd go running into his arms.

But there was nobody. Nobody to stop you, nobody to tell you this wasn’t how it was supposed to end.

You checked in, went through security, and found yourself sitting at the gate, staring at the stupid pet rocks Vinny had given you.

Your fingers curled around the one painted like him, gripping it so tightly your knuckles turned white. You had no idea what you were doing. If this was the right choice. If you were running away again.

Maybe in another life, you would’ve stayed.

Maybe in another life, you would’ve picked Vinny from the start.

Maybe in another life, Noah would’ve fought for you.

But in this one, you knew you had to let them both go.

Once you were sat in your seat, preparing to switch your phone off and sleep on the way home, you received a text. 

Hey, y/n! Hope you’re doing well! I’m so sorry to have to do this, but our management said we can’t take you with us on our upcoming tour due to the recent news about your relationships with members of the bands you’ve been working with. I just need you to know, this isn’t a decision I’ve made, I was against this as I would’ve loved you to join us, but it’s out of my control. I’m so sorry, y/n, but I wish you the best.

Stay in touch. Andy 

You felt like you had been shot in the chest.

As if things couldn’t get any worse.  

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“So, I was thinking… We should play the new song tomorrow. I know I said save it for the next tour but what do you think?” Vin asked as he wiped his arms down with a towel, trying to get off the remainder of his body paint before getting changed. “It’s the last night, let’s give ‘em something new.”

“I like your thinking.” Chris smiled, “But I also know what the true meaning behind this song is, even if you won’t admit it"

Vinny didn’t respond, just kept scrubbing at the black paint on his forearms.

"Are you sure you’re ready to put this out whilst everything’s still so raw?”

Vinny let out a slow exhale and shrugged.

“I don’t care, to be totally honest.” He finally met Chris’ gaze in the mirror. “Let them think what they want to think.”

Justin, who had been half-listening while scrolling on his phone, turned around.

“Wait. I know you helped write the song, but… is it really about her?”

Vinny tossed the towel into his laundry bag.

“Maybe.” He smirked, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Maybe not.”

Later that night, on the bus, he lied in his bunk with his phone in his hands, staring at your contact name.

He shouldn’t text you.

But he wanted to. Wanted to check if you got home safe. If you were okay. If you were happy, or as happy as you could be. He also wanted to give you a heads-up about tomorrow night. Maybe even ask for permission.

His fingers hovered over the keyboard before he finally gave in.

Hey, I hope you got home safe. Just know that while you’re sleeping happily in your own bed, I’m out here getting back pain from the bunks lmao.

We’re thinking about playing that new song tomorrow night. Would it be okay?

You walked into your bedroom after brushing your teeth, settling under the covers before reaching for your phone on the nightstand. You saw you had two messages from Vinny.

You hesitated before typing back.

Surely, I should be the first to hear it.

Vinny stared at your reply. His thumb hovered over the screen.

Should he?

You were gone. And for all he knew, he might never see you again.

He sighed, then hit send.

[1 Video Attachment]

I know my singing isn’t the best, but I recorded this the other week. I’ve been writing lyrics ever since I first felt I was losing you to Noah, not that you were ever mine to lose. At first, it was just random lines, but then I remembered we had that track from Illenium. Chris hadn’t worked on lyrics for it yet, so I showed him what I had. He loved it. So with his help, we turned it into something real.

Please don’t get mad. I just needed to get it out of my head.

…

The next day, you still hadn’t opened the video. Or even replied.

You couldn’t.

It sat there in your messages, taunting you. Every time you picked up your phone, your eyes flickered to the notification, to his name. But your thumb always hesitated, hovered, then swiped away.

Instead, you went about your day, throwing yourself into anything that could possibly serve as a distraction. You practically begged your manager to take you back, pleaded for any opportunity. You needed something for the meantime as you had been in contact with a few bands, asking about work, but deep down you knew the truth. No one would call. No one would offer you work.

Not after everything.

The entire scene knew by now, for all the wrong reasons. You weren’t a photographer anymore, you were a fucking scandal, a lesson to be learned, a warning of what not to do.

By the time you got home, you felt hollow. The weight of exhaustion pressed down on you, but you didn’t sleep, how could you? You stared at your ceiling, phone clutched in your hand, Angela’s texts illuminating the dark room.

He’s not okay.

You stared at the message for a long time.

I’ve never seen him like this. He barely talked before the show. He’s throwing himself into playing like it’s the only thing keeping him standing. I want to help but I don't know how.

Your breath hitched.

You wanted to type something back, anything, but what could you even say? That it wasn’t your problem anymore? He should get over it?

That it was easier this way?

Lies. Every single one of them.

Angela’s next text sent a chill up your spine.

They’re about to go on.

Your heart lurched knowing that song was going to be played at this show and you still hadn't heard it.

Your fingers hovered over Vinny’s contact. You could ignore it. You should ignore it.

But you didn’t.

Instead, with a shaky breath, you tapped the message thread and pressed play.

Vinny was sat at a piano?

Your breath stuttered.

Since when did he play?

He didn’t look at the camera. His head was bowed, fingers ghosting over the keys. His voice was quiet, almost hesitant, but steady.

But his words hit you like a punch to the stomach.

If you fall, then I will too, into nothing ever after. Do we have to face the truth, or look away, neglect the wounds? All the warning signs we refused to see, like a hurricane that’s drowning me.

The breath left your lungs.

You clenched your jaw, curling your fingers into your palm. The phone shook slightly in your grip.

So we build it up just to tear it down But the pieces don’t fit now. We’re falling apart, we’re fading away Pretending the damage doesn’t matter.

It hurt.

Not because of his voice, but because of the truth in his words. And knowing he had written this.

You had both caused this.

You pressed the phone against your chest, squeezing your eyes shut. You couldn't listen to the rest.

You weren’t sure how long you sat there, how long you tried to swallow down the lump in your throat.

Then your screen lit up again.

Angela.

They just announced the new song.

You didn’t move.

Chris just said the title.

You didn’t need to read the next text.

You knew what it was called.

You knew exactly what it was called.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

On stage, the lights pulsed as the crowd roared and cheered.

Vinny sat behind his kit, head down, drumsticks clenched so tight his hands trembled.

We've been dreaming wide awake, feeding poison to each other. It's too hard to walk away, 'cause it's easier to suffer.

He should’ve done everything differently.

He should’ve fought harder. He should've tried harder.

But it was too late.

"Everybody fucking JUMP!" Chris shouted out to the crowd.

The floor of the venue shook. The crowd screamed, fists in the air, bodies moving to the music, completely unaware of the war raging inside the mind of the man behind the drums.

Vinny slammed into the drums like his life depended on it. Like if he just hit hard enough, he could beat the pain out of his own chest. Hit after hit, faster, louder, pouring every ounce of frustration, heartbreak, and regret into the set, until his vision blurred.

Until he felt something hot and wet hit his hands.

Tears.

He barely noticed at first.

But Angela did.

She saw everything.

The way his head dropped lower. The way his shoulders curled in. The way his hands trembled between hits.

The song was coming to its climax, but Vinny didn’t feel the energy of the crowd anymore.

He felt his own heart breaking all over again.

We're fallin' apart, we're fading away Pretending the damage doesn't matter. Ignoring the scars, but now it's too late We settle for nothing ever after...

Nothing.

The lights pulsed red.

His chest felt hollow, his head spun.

And still, he played.

Even as his drumsticks cracked under the force of his grip. Even as the tears blurred his vision. Even as he felt like he was seconds away from shattering completely.

Because that’s all he could do.

Play until there was nothing left.

Play until he felt something.

Play until the past was nothing more than an echo in the back of his mind.

Play until he forgot.

But how could he forget?

How could he forget the way you looked next to him in bed in the mornings, hair a tangled mess, eyes still heavy with sleep as you blinked up at him like you weren’t quite sure if you were awake yet?

How could he forget the way you used to look in his hoodies, when you'd steal one and curl up beside him, your warmth pressing into his side like you belonged there?

How could he forget the way he made you laugh, a sound so full of life that it made his chest ache?

How could he forget the way you looked at him?

Like he was the only thing in the world that mattered.

Like you loved him.

But if you loved him, why did you leave?

Why was it so easy for you to walk away while he was still here, drowning in everything you left behind?

Why did it feel like he was the only one who couldn’t move on?

We settle for nothing...

And as the song finally came to an end, he let himself breathe.

There would be no more hiding. No more looking over his shoulder, waiting for Noah’s glare. No more having to bite his tongue.

It was out now and he didn't care.

Because now he had nothing left to lose.

Ever after.

--------------------------

i am so so sorry to everyone who was excited to find out who she ends up with but the title of the fic is nothing ever after... it was always going to end this way :') BUT if you're still here reading this i'm going to spoil something. it's not over. i have 2 sequels for this fic. TWO!! ONE FOR THE VINNY GIRLIES. ONE FOR NOAH GIRLIES!! i'm already on chapter 15 of the vin fic (which is literally insane but i've been writing it on and off for two months now) and i'm on chapter 5 of the noah one which i finally started last week, but i know there are literally NO fics for vinny so that was kinda my priotity :) THANK YOU FOR READING AND IM SORRY FOR THE ENDING LMAO I LOVE YOU!! <33

@rumoured-whispers @bloody-spades @lma1986 @thisbicc @dominuslunae @miss570 @miamore0570 @jilliemiw86 @itsyaboinoah @kait16xo @discocowgirly @rainy-darling

[florihaei]

𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁- 𝘄𝗼𝗼𝘇𝗶⋆୨୧˚

pairing-bf woozi!* fem reader! ♡

word count- 591 ♡

genre: fluff ♡

warnings- everything is lowercase on purpose ♡

୨୧˚authors note -this is for the seventeen drabble week! , you can read all of them here!

it was a rainy saturday afternoon when you stumbled upon an old shoebox tucked away in the far corner of your shared closet. you were looking for a pair of boots when your fingers brushed against the rough cardboard, and curiosity tugged at your heart. pulling it out, you noticed that the box was filled not with shoes but with keepsakes from you and woozis relationship concert tickets, handwritten notes, and photos from you twos adventures together.

as you rummaged through the contents, your eyes landed on a carefully crafted mixtape labeled “for you.” the handwriting was unmistakably woozi, with its familiar loops and swirls. a wave of excitement surged through yoy. in an era dominated by playlists, woozi had gone the extra mile, curating a mixtape just for you.

with a smile curling on your lips, you fished out an old cassette player from the shelf and dusted it off. you inserted the tape, pressed play, and the familiar strumming of a guitar filled the room. the first song trailed through the air, “better together” by jack johnson. it reminded you of lazy sunday mornings spent cuddled up on the couch, the sunlight streaming in as you two made breakfast together. you could almost see woozi flipping pancakes, a spatula in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other, while you playfully frustrated him by stealing bites before he could plate them.

the next track began, and it was “landslide” by fleetwood mac. your heart flutter as you recalled the night you two drove up to the mountains last fall, the car windows down, the chilly breeze tangling your hair. you two parked under a blanket of stars and talked about both of your dreams and fears, sharing secrets that deepened you twos connection. you guys had laughed and cried that night, all the while feeling utterly safe in each other’s arms.

as each song played, memories flooded back. there was “just the way you are” by bruno mars, which took you to the first anniversary, where woozi surprised you with a candlelit dinner and whispered sweet nothings as you two danced in the living room. Each track was a chapter of your guys love story, woven together like strands of a beautiful tapestry.

after the tape finally concluded with “home” by edward sharpe and the magnetic zeros, you sat in silence, overwhelmed with emotion. it was a reminder of how far you two had come, each song echoing parts of you twos journey, growing together, celebrating milestones, and supporting each other through tough times.

woozi emerged from the kitchen, his expression curious as he saw your misty-eyed demeanor. “angle .. what’s wrong?” he asked, concern etched on his face.

you held up the mixtape, a grin breaking through your tears. “this… this is incredible! you really made this for me?”

a sheepish smile spread across his lips as he nodded. “i wanted to remind you of our journey, a little something to reflect on all the moments we’ve shared.”

you beamed, moving closer to him. “each song brought back such vivid memories. I feel so lucky to have you baby.”

woozi pulled you into a gentle embrace, both of your hearts aligned in a comfortable rhythm. “and I feel lucky to have you angel” he replied softly. “let’s keep making more beautiful memories together.”

as both of you sat in the gentle glow of the fading day, you two knew this mixtape wasn’t just a collection of songs, it was a celebration of the love, a promise that this journey was far from over.

[chao-thicc-hcs]

If you don’t want to do this it’s completely fine.

I wonder how tr characters would react when they overstimulation yn sm that she used her safe word 🧍🏻‍♀️🤸🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ if so, please add sanzu ran baji 🤧🤧👀

a/n: tumblr keeps flagging and labeling my posts, so I will force myself to use "cock", cuz it will deffo be better ☠️

featuring: baji keisukue, sanzu haruchiyo, ran haitani

off to hornyland we go!

↳warning(s): idk

↳ALL CHARACTERS ARE 20+. MINORS DNI

↳reader is afab!

IMPORTANT! ON RAN'S PART, THEY BOTH HAVE TALKED ABOUT THIS BEFORE AND THE READER IS CONSENTING TO THIS!!!!

Baji↷

He was angry today. Much to your own surprise, he wouldn't even soften around you, nor would melt under the way your hands cupped his face and brushed his hair, and he didn't want to talk about his anger. He just wanted to fuck you senseless. And you, of course, didn't mind it.

Shaking under his movements, your eyes almost doing a 360 at how rough he was, your legs felt like giving up and you were on the verge of passing out. Tears were rolling down your cheeks so thick and frequent you could see them dropping on the bedsheets. You were screaming, voice cracking from the amount of pressure you were putting on your vocal chords.

It was all too much, his cock was so immaculately hitting your g-spot, sending waves of pleasure over your entire lower area, his rough hand tugging onto your hair, other one squeezing your hips like you were going to slip away at any second. The bed was shaking, so were you, so was Baji.

-V-vanilla...!- you moaned out, and his movements slowed down. Baji leaned down and whispered in your ear, his eyes filled with worry and his voice softer than before

-Are you okay, dollie? Did I hurt you?

-Ah, no... just...

There was a minute of silence between the two of you as you tried catching your breath and stopping the tears from flowing down. Baji stopped what he was doing and hugged you from behind, placing gentle kisses on your shoulders and massaging your lower abdomen.

-Doll, should we stop here?

-N-no... I was just overstimulated, you were way harsher than usual. I just need a minute to calm down.

-'m sorry...

-Hey, don't stress it, I will be okay, I am calmer now.

Baji nodded and placed you to lay comfortably down once again, inserting his entire length inside of you, making you squirm, still sensitive from before. -'m gonna make you cum now, babydoll, but do tell me if I am too rough again.

-No, be as rough as you can get, my love, I can handle it now.-with your words followed an abrupt increase in his pace, making you arch your back and scratch his back, loud, lewd moans escaping your lips.

-I will make you scream so loud that our neighbors will be knocking on our door.

Sanzu↷

You were supposed to be on a fancy dinner with his gang, chatting and eating inside a lavish restaurant, sitting on a huge, round table with an expensive, velvet tablecloth. Sanzu, however had other plans, and he had you sitting on top of him inside the toilet stall, riding his cock like crazy.

He couldn't take it any longer. How could you wear the sexiest silk dress known to mankind that beautifully hugged your body, emphasizing your tits and ass, and not expect Sanzu to get hard on the spot? Calloused hands roamed around your butt and thighs, wrinkling the once neatly ironed dress you wore, your panties were torn apart and thrown on the ground. Sanzu's face was buried into your tits, sucking and nibbling on them, leaving purple marks and bites, inhaling the remaining scent of your sweet perfume on.

-Just like that, babygirl, gosh - you're taking me so well, you're gonna make me cum so quickly.

He was big, and you barely fit him inside. Your hands were grabbing the fabric of his suit on his shoulders, your lips placed on his forehead, leaving lipstick stains. His thrusts were rough and harsh, the echoes of skin slapping wafting around the bathroom stall. Your hips moved in unison with his, and it felt as if you were seeing stars falling down in front of you. His eyes stared right at yours, smirking and enjoying the way your expressions change with every second he thrusts inside of you.

-M-m, Sanzu... deeper..

He managed to get his entire cock inside, filling you up so good, lewd moans and whimpers escaping your mouth, eyes shut and head arching back, exposing the skin on your neck he immediately latched onto. -You're filling me up so good, shit...-your walls were clenched around his cock, but you didn't want to cum just yet.

-Say it.

-Huh?

-Say the word.

He said in a stern tone, squeezing your ass tightly, leaving crescent marks. You bit your lip, hearing people coming in and out of the bathroom, embarrassed to speak up again, you didn't want to get caught. As soon as it became quiet once again, Sanzu thrusted harshly, hitting your cervix with force.

-Say.it.

-Daddy!-you moaned out, gritting your teeth.

Sanzu was riled up, his pace accelerated, relentlessly hitting your cervix over and over with his long, veiny cock. The light pain mixed with pleasure made your vision go fuzzy, sweat beads going down your forehead, lightly smearing the mascara and eye pencil you were wearing. Your hands were convulsing, your legs were trembling, unable to support your weight anymore.

-P-pe-ach!-you barely finished the word, and your legs gave up, you couldn't move on his lap anymore. Sanzu ceased his movements, letting go of your ass and helping you stand up. The pinknette helped you fix your dress in front of the big mirror in the bathroom, his hands wrapping around your waist in an embrace.

-You did so good, babygirl. Always making me feel so good.-he pulled you in for a gentle kiss, licking your lower lip

-So did you, Sanzu. I was just overstimulated.

-I know, now let's go to the others, or they will get suspicious. And keep your panties off, I will finish you off with my fingers.~

Ran↷

It was around 2AM when Ran woke up from a wet dream, hard and sweaty. You were sleeping, your back facing him, wearing his oversized T-shirt and had his boxers on. The view just made him go insane, to the point where his cock was hurting and already leaking with precum. What a beautiful sight you were.

Ran slowly removed his and the boxers you were wearing, revealing the sight of your pretty pussy in front of him. His mouth filled with saliva, and lightly licked your entrance, just so he can get you wet properly, and his cock found its way inside of you. You just cannot miss how good he filled and stretched you, because he packed in girth. You woke up, a light purr escaping your mouth, still drowsy from the sudden feeling.

-Aw, my kitten has woken up, do you like it when I do this, hm?

Your clit never went unnoticed. His fingers made their way to your sensitive clit, massaging it slowly and sensually. You lifted your leg a little, moving with him. You could feel his breath on your ear as he moaned in a raspy voice, sending chills down your spine. The room was filled with the sinful mixture of moans and skin slapping. Silk sheets wrinkling under your bodies.

As your moans got louder, Ran's hips moved faster and faster, fingers still playing with your clit, stimulating you. His free hand grabbed your neck, squeezing it tightly, making you light-headed and drooling from your mouth. Manipulated under his touch, your drowsiness suddenly disappeared, your eyes widening at how close you were to cumming, but Ran's fingers worked wonders, and his cock was oh so sweetly hitting the spot.

-Ran, rose!-you moaned out and Ran stopped moving.

-What rose, exactly, my kitten?

-...white...

You had your fair share of Ran overstimulating you, and you loved it when he continued while your body convulsed under him, but just in case - white rose meant to continue, red rose meant period is near, and yellow rose meant stop. Ran smirked and his movements continued, but he began slower this time, teasing the living fuck out of you.

-Just you wait, I don't intend to sleep anymore. The night is ours.

©chao-thicc-hcs. reblogs are deeply appreciated, i read all your tags.

[rayssyscourse]

syscourse hot take (more like syscourse tired take honestly) "pro/neutral/anti-endo": for anyone who's endogenic in any way, or even just previously thought they were endogenic, it's really tiring (and not conducive to constructive conversation) to have so many syscourse labels revolve around...an innate aspect of someone's lived experience. Like. We are fully aware that plenty of people who label themselves "anti-endo" don't necessarily think that endogenic systems are fake and/or evil etc, that's just purely a demonstrably true statement. We don't even think that the people using "anti-endo" that way are necessarily Terrible People for doing so. Simultaneously, though, speaking as a system who spent years thinking we were 100%-basic-vanilla-endogenic but still wanted to take part in nuanced discussions around system experiences and offer our perspectives on discourse--seeing 'anti-endo' or even 'endo-neutral' always still...stung a little? Even when someone was conversing in good faith. Like, the idea that it was acceptable for our personhood (which really is what it felt like the arguments were about! whether one of us was 'just a made-up daydream' and not a person) to be up for debate, that it was an acceptable "political football" or thing to be "neutral" about...wasn't a good feeling. And honestly, even though we technically have a DID dx on paper these days, we still get that little flicker of distrust whenever we see 'anti-endo' in someone's bio--because we're still exactly the same system that we were before, and if they wouldn't have believed us about our experiences then...why do they think so much depends on some rubber-stamp diagnosis? what do they think changed? We don't have a good answer to this problem, though. Telling people that they're automatically terrible bigots for not labeling themselves pro-endo doesn't feel like it'll actually solve anything, because crucially I don't think that most of the "doesn't actually believe endos are fake or bad"-anti-endos are calling themselves that for a reason that simply shaming them sufficiently will change. Also, the internet is a big place, and expecting everyone to be up-to-date on every possible niche discourse stance is absurd--and if someone really just wants to stay the heck away from system discourse entirely, they should be able to. But also...yeah, we wish they'd use different words. Don't use "anti-[unchangeable aspect of someone's identity]" and not expect it to feel hurtful to see. "Well, I just don't want people Like That interacting with me..." what if they just thought your art was cool? What if they agreed with your hot take about [insert fandom here]? Who else are you 'anti', not because you disagree with some opinion they hold, but purely because you're 'nothing like them'? Idk. It's frustrating, and I wish we had some kind of easy, magic solution.

thank you!! this is a really well written thought, and i fully agree.

to be honest, this is one of (admittedly many) reasons i dropped pro/anti-endo labels altogether. not only can they come across as denying somebody's existence, but i feel like we just don't fit in simple boxes like that. i mean, "pro-endo" can mean any plethora of things: it could mean the person is endogenic, they support endos, they don't engage in syscourse/just don't care, they just disagree with anti-endo points, etc etc. in the same way, "anti-endo" can also mean a million things. some anti-endos think endos are all faking, some think they're misinformed, some believe they exist but think they're spreading too much misinfo, some think they're doing harm to traumagenic communities, etc. i also just don't like the black-and-white way those labels portray us. somebody being pro-endo doesn't mean they support every single endo, it doesn't mean they necessarily support radqueers (weird misconception i see a lot), and it doesn't mean they have no criticisms of the endogenic community. i know a lot of anti-endos who fully believe and don't hate endos but just have criticisms of the label and/or community, who are often assumed to hate all endos or think all endos are faking because the label is just too broad and comes across completely wrong.

sorry to ramble on for so long in one giant paragraph lol. tl;dr, you're so right, say it louder for the people in the back!!

[fixing-bad-posts]

Heya, I really really hope this doesn't come off as particularly rude, but I was wondering, why would bisexual women be considered lesbians sometimes and I think you also brought up transgender men and genderqueer ppl? For bisexual women, I just am kinda confused, they can be in lesbian relationships and lesbian spaces, but just describing them as lesbians seems kinda confusing because lesbian denotes specifically sapphic attraction at least from where I've always heard it, so wouldn't it be kinda confusing. And for the genderqueer folks or trans folks, wouldn't that just bring their genders closer to feminine and at least from what I've heard from some pple I know, they don't like non binary being seen as more womanly (I've heard it being described as woman-lite before annoying) and instead seen as a more inbetween which it sometimes isn't, because of bigotry and other things since nbs can be both fem or masc or androgynous, but wouldn't non woman lesbians kinda push it to be seen as kinda more fem or that person as more fem? I don't know and frankly I'm just kinda confused. I'm really really sorry that this probably comes off as super rude and I hope you forgive me. I frankly just want to learn a little more and have been reading up but wanted to know what you thought. And I just realized how long this was, so so sorry

hello anon! these days, i usually don’t answer asks like these because i’ve already done so several times, but you seem very well-meaning and confused, so i’ll do my best to help. first of all, please check my faq for resources and links about mspec labels and bi lesbians.

second of all—generally—here is my advice for when you encounter a queer label that confuses you:

1) literally just ignore it until you...

2) meet someone in your life who uses that label, at which point you might (respectfully) ask them what using that label means to them specifically, and why it’s important. i’ve done this in real life. the script is something like,

“it’s really cool to get to talk to someone in real life about this stuff—if i may ask, what does identifying as [insert label] mean to you, personally?”

you might also say,

“i’ve never met someone who identifies with [their label] before. would you mind giving me some pointers on the important things to keep in mind in order to respect your identity/make sure you feel respected by me?”

i’ve also never asked anyone to correct me if i mess up and say something rude, but i’m working on the confidence and charisma to be able to say that, because i owe that to others.

all of that said, i wanted to respond to some of your specific questions, and clarify a couple of things below the cut. to clarify:

1. “describing [bisexual women] as lesbians seems kinda confusing because lesbian denotes specifically sapphic attraction”. to be clear i am not the one describing bisexual women as lesbians, in this hypothetical situation. when i post about bi-lesbians, i am posting in support of people who—for whatever reason—chose that label for themselves. what i am not doing: advocating to redefine the classically understood definition of lesbian for the entire populous.

2. “wouldn’t it be kinda confusing”? yes! i understand it can be confusing, and i commend you for expressing your confusion instead of reacting in disgust or anger. there are so many things in the queer community that are confusing, even to me, and you don’t need to feel guilty for asking questions as long as you come from a place of genuine curiosity. being confused isn’t bad, and defining yourself in a way that confuses others is, likewise, no transgression.

3. “for the genderqueer folks or trans folks, wouldn’t [identifying as a lesbian] just bring their genders closer to feminine […] wouldn’t non woman lesbians […] be seen as kinda more fem”? the answer is: sort of. it depends entirely on how and why the person using this label came to these words. you wrote, “i’ve heard from some pple i know, they don’t like non binary being seen as more womanly”, and i have definitely also heard that! so, for people who feel that way, they probably wouldn’t want a label that evokes womanhood and/or aligns them with femininity assigned to them. but every person is different—so for some nonbinary people, they absolutely do not want to be seen as “woman-lite”, whereas for other nonbinary people, they might want to be seen closer to femme than masc, while still nonbinary. this goes back to what i said at the beginning: best practice is to ask the people in your life how they want you to respect them.

closing thoughts: i hope this clarified some things, but i understand that the topic may still be confusing—feel free to message me if you want a non-judgmental queer to talk things through with. i promise i’ll take you in good faith <3

[janeuary-month]

FAQs for Janeuary 2025

Janeuary 2025 is coming soon! Here are answers to some questions I’ve gotten or that you may be wondering about before participating in the event:

Can I join?

Yes! This is an open event with no sign-ups. You don’t need to notify me or get my permission. Everyone is welcome.

Do I have to do something for every one of the prompts?

No! Just one is fine. You can do more if you wish, or multiple works for the same prompt, but none of this is necessary. The list of prompts is here.

Can I combine prompts?

Sure! Just please note in your post all the prompts you’re using. If possible, post your work on the earliest day for the prompts shown in it, and we’ll reblog it on that day, but we’ll tag it with all the days/prompts you used. For instance, if you write a fic about characters staying in an inn (day 5) in London (day 15), post on day 5 and state in your post that it’s meant for both prompts.

Do I have to create my art/fic/whatever on the day itself?

No! That would be super hard to do—I’m not that mean! Create it now, and just hold off on posting it until the day of the prompt you used.

Does my fic/art need to take place in Regency England, or are AUs allowed?

As long as you have at least one Austen-work or Austen-adaptation character, you can stick them in whatever universe you wish. However, if you want to use all non-Austen characters, they need to be in an Austen universe. So, for day 11 “card playing,” you could draw Sonic the Hedgehog playing whist in a Regency drawing room OR you could draw Darcy and Elizabeth playing poker in modern-day Las Vegas, and either of these would be totally acceptable.

Completely canon-compliant works are of course also allowed!

Can I include non-Austen characters in my creations?

Sure! As long as you have at least one Austen-work or Austen-adaptation character, OR place your work in an Austen AU, you can include whatever other characters you wish. Characters from other media, OCs, reader inserts, they’re all fine. 

And remember that there is no bashing of others’ characters or ships! Accounts that do so will get blocked. Review the full list of rules here.

What does it mean that the work has to be new?

Basically, it can’t have been posted anywhere before. BUT this means that a new chapter on an old fic is totally valid! So is taking an old line drawing and coloring it and then posting the new colored version. That sort of thing.

And the work doesn’t have to be completed before the end of the month either, so if you have a long-running fic that has been going for years already and is going to keep going far after next January, you can still participate by working the prompts into a chapter or two during the month and then carrying on as you like afterwards.

Can I make [fill in the blank fanwork]?

Yep. Any type of fanwork you can dream up is welcome, not just fic and art. Crochet a bonnet for day 23 and post a pic of it, make a photo montage of yourself doing Emma cosplay, edit together a Bride and Prejudice music video, we love it all!

Is NSFW allowed?

Yes, with any sort of content and kink you like, but since there may be minors following this account, please tag it appropriately. If posting mature content directly on Tumblr rather than AO3, also use its community labels function and/or hide the content under a “keep reading” link. And minors—do not engage with content that is not meant for you.

Is AI allowed?

Absolutely not. This account will not reblog or include in the AO3 collection anything that was made with AI involved to any degree. Even if you just use AI to make a banner to go along with your fic that you manually wrote, we will not reblog it. Review the full list of rules here.

How do I post my work so it gets included?

You must tag the @janeuary-month account in your Tumblr post for us to see it and reblog it from this account. Also, state which day/prompt you’re following and use the hashtag #janeuary and/or #janeuary 2025. Full posting instructions are coming soon.

Should I post my fic on AO3 or Tumblr?

Whatever you prefer. If you post it on AO3 and also make a Tumblr post to link to it, we will reblog the Tumblr post. If you only post to the AO3 collection, we will have nothing to reblog, but it will still be in the collection for others to find that way.

I don’t post my art on Tumblr; can I still participate?

You’re welcome to post your creation wherever you like, but without a Tumblr post, we have nothing to reblog to make it officially part of the event. But, if you post elsewhere (Instagram, Twitter, DeviantArt, etc.), you can also post a link to your own work on your own Tumblr, and then we can reblog your Tumblr post.

I don’t write in English; can I still participate?

Yes! All languages are welcome—just make sure to clearly mark the day/prompt so that we can still easily reblog.

I’m not going to get my work done on time; can I still participate?

Please do! We’re happy to accept late entries! We understand that life happens, so just tag us when you’ve posted it and we’ll reblog it, even weeks later. The AO3 collection (link coming soon) will remain open indefinitely.

Also, remember that the work doesn’t have to be completed before the end of the event, just the portion of it that’s connected to the prompt. For instance, you can start a fic on day 31 for the manners prompt by just posting that one completed chapter, and then after the month is over keep adding more chapters to it.

How can I connect with the other people participating in this event?

Building personal connections between those in our fandom community is the best part of events like this, so while there’s no Discord server specifically for this event, there is the very active and positive “Jane Austen” Discord server where we can connect. Even if that sort of thing is not for you, please do your part to foster community by reblogging and commenting on people’s work!

Did I miss any questions that you still have? If so, please reply to this post, send me an ask, or send me a DM.

[drjae69]

THE JOB …

Life hasn’t been kind to you lately, the divorce has left you hard up for cash and anything you do or goes to her . Needing to offset it you went looking for a new job after your last job had laid you off unceremoniously out of the blue. After looking through your local job board around sweeping between the pages you found a strange offer a job at a hospital , with no requirements except be male , 18 and healthy the page was cryptic with the description saying it offered a free room , board and “competitive” salary . You would call seeing what it was and the person on the other side would ask you a here is a questions about if you were healthy , sexual organs working and age . After finishing their battery of questions they would ask you if you didn’t mind to come to them to learn more tomorrow , and tomorrow it was . Arriving there you would enter their waiting room monetize place straight out of your local regular hospital but it was starkly empty you would approach the lady at the desk and why you were here . She would give you a clipboard and ask you to fill out the fields and you would be along shortly . Once you’ve finished a nurse came to you and told you to follow her into the back . Going back there you wouldn’t a small room or she would ask you a couple questions noting them all . Once satisfied would give you a hospital gown and asked you to undress telling you that you got the job and all you had to do now was put this on and follow her. Taking off your clothes and putting the gown on she wouldn’t ask for you to nice looking hospital room telling you this was your room and board and please wait here until she got back . 

A few minutes pasted , before she returned with a gurney and asked you to lie down on it . once on, she would raise the rails on it , and slowly inserted an IV dip tip into you . Putting a thin blanket on you she would take you down the winding hall through multiple double doors leaving the rooms behind . As she approached your destination she stated that you were the prefect “Bull” for them and we’re going to do amazing things together. Arriving in a small room with a table in it you looked around it not impressed as she maneuvered the gurneyinto place .

Once situated , she and another nurse would move you from the gurney to the bed lying you down on the bed in your arms and legs on the rests to secure them in place. before long she would put visibility over you . As you lay there you wonder what they were doing before the other nerves came over with an oxygen mask and put it on your face asking you to breathe normally . So you would feel several pricks on either arm as you felt unable to move yet strangely calm . they would also continue to administer IV but now with a different label you could barely make out which had the word in bold “BULL” . As you sat there you felt you penis grow ever more erect until it felt someone squeezing it because it was so big . Before you knew it they had placed big tube on it with plastic tubes coming from it and then they turned it on . You felt it switch on pulsating sucking rapidly almost like you’re making love to someone rapidly. As your glazed over eyes glanced door you saw transparent to almost opaque white liquid being rapidly pulled and sucked from it and then you realized what bull really meant now. You were the bull in question . Your job here was to be milked for specimen, used for donation and other purposes . The IV they were feeding you was laced with Viagra and regular everyday liquid nourishment, so you could be here for all hours producing and only that. You are a Bull now , and your only purpose now is to be milked and to produce.

[thethiefandtheairbender]

Sometimes in fandom — usually after a fandom has gone from near universal adoration within the fandom, and then had something happen (a season release, a ship goes or doesn't go canon, etc) where it's more broadly criticized — there'll be an according shift in how canon is widely discussed.

Before, where things only would've been discussed with enthusiasm and excitement, there becomes a distinct lack of... any of that without conditions or caveats at most intervals. 

It no longer becomes "I loved the this thing here's why!" but "Yeah the season had flaws but I liked some of it," or "You can ship this thing but you have to admit it has—" or "yeah it was interesting it just could've been written better." 

The criticism is constant and it is vague. It's assumptive. If there are explanations as to what is meant and why, it is once and often not based in wanting to understand why the text would also do XYZ thing. This is not necessarily 'bad' criticism (just personally, occasionally annoying, although it's not as though I've never participated in it myself), just sometimes underdeveloped. Nor is this vein of fandom criticism all fandom criticism by any means.

After all, sometimes fans complain with long winded specifically ad nauseam until the critique becomes so far removed from any spectre of reality, it's like they're watching a completely different show (this is the worst kind). Other times, even once the emotions have died down, people step back and write metas about how there was structural buildup but lack of payoff or how, even though is character may be acting in line with previous characterization, this specific situational response felt OOC for [inserted reasons here] (this is the best kind, because you can actually see where people are coming from, they're acknowledging the constraints/desires/intention of the and therefore working with the text, and you can sometimes change your mind or have a better understanding of what, alternatively, worked for you). 

The problem, I think, with assumptive criticism is that it assumes a viewpoint is universal... when it's really, inevitably, not. For example, in like the 10/11 fandoms I've heavily been in, MY critiques of the thing are Different than what others in the fandom(s) critique, and it is for those exact reasons that I do my best not to engage in assumptive critique.

Because that's the kind of critique where, although short, it can shut down conversation about what might be some people's favourite parts of canon into something that feels loaded, or pointedly contradictory/contrarian, instead of just... "I liked this thing and here's why" that just got to exist freely before critique became more mainstream in the space.

In a similar vein where proship spaces say "I don't have to give a disclaimer that I know a ship is 'problematic' when I make a ship post about them," assumptive fandom critique creates a similar catch 22. Cause I think we've all seen ships broadly labelled as problematic with wildly varying degrees of validity, and ones where we sat here like "It's not problematic at all???" Subjectivity means that sometimes "X thing is flawed and I like it anyway" isn't necessarily true; sometimes it means "I like X thing and don't really think it has flaws" which is also equally, subjectively, true.

Because if I like a thing, I don't have to offer caveats; I don't have to do anything, especially if coming from me they'd be untrue. That thing is not objectively flawed and I don't have to act like it. The things that are flaws to you are oftentimes the things I like, that I think the story had good and/or interesting reasons for, or personally greatly enjoy, or are sometimes even the Best part of that story (to me). (Maybe some of the things I think are flaws are parts you like. That's awesome! All the power to you.)

If what I like in canon aligns with what the creators seemingly enjoyed or were trying to go for in canon, that just means that I'm more in alignment with the text, and 'correct' in ways we usually associate with correctness, but not all by any means (not necessarily intelligence, for ex, the same way critiquing a text in a negative way also doesn't say anything about intelligence).

I ship all the ATLA canon ships and I think they're good, and important, and interesting; I like the EIP conflict for Kataang, and I don't think I'd ship them half as hard without it / is one of my favourite pieces of characterization for Katara and her internal worldview(s). I like all the seasons of TDP's second arc, especially S4 (one of my faves) and including S7. I don't like the main ship that JWCC went for (they're even kind of a notp) and it bogged down early S4 for me, but with S5 in mind I think it was a smart, interesting choice even if it's not my personal preference (personality wise for the characters due to their similarities in mindsets and drastic differently long term goals), and I think the execution could've been eased further in, but those are nitpicks. That doesn't mean it's Bad.

A story doesn't have to align with all my preferences to be good; the story just has to align with itself, and I can be along for the ride. And if I'm no longer down to be along for the ride, I'm going to be specific as hell about why while still acknowledging all the (probably good) reasons the show did those things Anyway, because that's where criticism intersects most strongly with critical thinking, tbh.

[platonically-loving-alastor]

Aroace Alastor

Hoo boy here we go- This one might make some people mad at me, so I'll preface by saying I do not want to start a fight and as long as you respect my business, I'll respect yours. But let's get this over with-

First off, I genuinely don't understand how some people can see the Ace-In-The-Hole quote and still believe that Alastor is only intended to be asexual and not also aromantic. Yes, the term Rosie used for purpose of the pun was 'ace', but can we look at the context of that moment before jumping to conclusions?

Rosie, motioning to Charlie: "Oh, who's this you brought with you? Come now, Alastor, she's much too young for you! Oh, I'm just kidding. I know you're an ace in the hole!"

Her original statement implies nothing sexual, only that he's involved in a relationship with Charlie, and she follows it up with why she knows that couldn't be because he's an 'ace in the hole'. I don't think you have to read too far between the lines to see that.

I would also like to say that when Vivienne has spoken about his orientation before, I recall her saying that she didn't want to confirm him being aromantic so that she wouldn't 'ruin anyone's fun', which I just feel like is an odd thing to say if she wasn't already explicitly picturing him as aroace. If she thought he had romantic attraction, why wouldn't she just say that? What fun would that ruin? I also feel like keeping things like this ambiguous just to appease the shippers is a little weird, but I digress-

And to those of you who I know are saying "But aromantic people can be in relationships too!!" *deep inhale* yeah I know. I'm not gonna pretend you're not right about that, but there are also aroace people who have exactly 0 interest in romance or sex at all. This is the part of the post that really is based on how I interpret certain moments, but to me he is absolutely one of those people. I don't really know where people get any vibes of him being interested in that stuff. I have never once looked at him and thought "Yeah I could see him in a romantic relationship with *insert character here*". Even aside from attraction in general, since that's what we'd be talking about at this point anyway, he just seems like the kind of guy who'd rather work and live independently instead of relying on anyone, whether practically or emotionally (which is also probably part of the reason he never joined the Vees, but that's another topic entirely). Hell, I'm pretty sure he's in heavy denial about even developing any kind of care or friendship with the people at the hotel (ie. the episode 8 scene with him and Niffty).

The only ships I see him involved in with people he doesn't hate (so ignoring RadioApple, RadioHusk, and StaticRadio. But to be real, maybe the fact all his main ships are enemies to lovers coded says something about the whole situation, but that's just me-) are Charlastor - which I will not even try to discuss here, people aren't gonna like this post as it is - and RadioRose. Rosie and him would at least be fair, if it weren't for one thing (which is also personal opinion on my end), and I don't know exactly how to word it. I'm tempted to say she has wingwoman vibes? But she knows he's aro, so that's not the right word, but there's vibes of like, she probably did act as a wingwoman before she realized that about him or something.. There's also something about her joking around like "Oh this is the girl? You have a girlfriend and I'm only now meeting her?" is almost giving motherly behavior. Idk man they're just besties to me, I could see them in a QPR though (not that they'd probably label it that way, considering the word queerplatonic is likely just complete gibberish to Alastor lmao).

So to summarize: It feels incredibly likely, if not practically canon, that Alastor was written with aromanticism in mind, even if Vivienne refuses to explicitly state it. Subtext and not-that-subtle implications can say just as much about a character as word of God, especially when that God has explicitly told us why she won't confirm or deny this information. Do I think any of this will stop people from shipping him romantically with literally any other character? No ofc it won't, and that's okay, that's just what fandoms do. I do think there's something to say for the fact the one aroace (or even at the very least asexual) character gets constantly shipped with everyone else in the cast, but this post is long enough I think. The only point of posting this is that I wanted to get information out there in one post to say "Hey, let's look a little bit past the surface for a second before saying there's no proof of him being aromantic"

Anyway, thanks for reading, I hope you at least took something away from this

[jacobsbigmelons]

Inspired by your username... Can I request one where Jacob's bf is obsessed with his pecs and like playing with them, maybe a first time blowjob too?

you don’t understand how much i love this

i am trying so hard not to self insert myself here because i’m a whole tiddy guy for men ESPECIALLY JACOBMYGODILLDOANYTHINGJUSTFORASQUEEZE

“They are pecs, not ‘tiddies’.”

Jacob Custos x male reader

nsfw, pec play, blowjobs, slightly public, muscle worship

“Anyone see Jacob? Y/N? They’ve just kinda been missing ever since we finished packing” Abi said, the sun beaming off of her colored hair. “Y/N always goes off on his own little trips, but Jacob? He probably got himself lost and trapped in a ditch somewhere knowing him” Kaitlyn spoke, her arms crossed over one another. “Or maybe they’re grabbing some last minute things?” Ryan shrugged as his suggestion floated in the air for a little bit “i think last minute was around 15 minutes ago, y’know…when the packing finished up?” “Touché” Ryan nodded.

“Hey don’t splash me!” Jacob complained as the cold water hit his body “Youre already wet stop being a baby!” You hollered before giving him another splash of lake water, which he returned just as quick. “Babe babe babe babe…babe! Watch this.” Jacob said as he swam towards the doc and pulled himself up as he wrapped his leg around the dock piling like a stripper pole, and began to rub his body from top to bottom before looking directly back to you. “You should be the next AdamandEve spokesperson” you yelled out, Jacob kept the pose, though with a confused look. “what’s that?” he said as he now wrapped his hand around the piling.

“Uh- website where you buy…y’know, stuff for late night bedroom stuff.” You said quieter as you also pulled yourself up onto the dock as you admired your boyfriends beautifully structured body. “I mean I could try but I don’t think they’d let me if it’s about sex and shit” Jacob said as he finally unraveled himself from the pole “and whys that? you got the body and you clearly know your way around a pole” You said as you pointed to him and the pole “Uh- Well i”m sure it wouldn’t matter but I uh…i’ve never been led to the bedroom, let’s say that.”

Jacobs statement drew a blank to you, you merely blinked at him for a few seconds before speaking “You never had sex?! Have you…ever had anything explicit with another person?” You we’re gonna speak more before Jacob intersected by putting his hand in front of him as a way to stop you from speaking. “Hey hey hey! I- I have actually thank you very much.” His tone trying not to waver nervously “mmmhm…lay with me” you demand with a small pat on the dock to let Jacob know to lay down as you shifted your body so your legs weren’t dangling off but instead laid on top of the dock.

Jacob walked the very few steps it took to get next to you as he crouched down before laying down fully, he put his arm behind his head as a way to support it. You moved in close to his chest as you rubbed your hand around his pecs and abs, the dripping water adding some shine to his physique. “Not saying i’m total eye candy but your more than welcome to admire” Jacob rubbed his other hand in-between your thighs.

“Yeah sure meathead” you teased as you sat up and straddled his lap as you looked down at him, his body definitely what Jacob labeled as ‘eye candy.’ You wrapped your hands on the sides of his chest before rubbing along it while playfully caressing the soft tissue in your hands. “You really like playing with my pecs huh?” Jacob stated, clearly not going to do anything to stop it though. “You got some hot tiddies what can I say.” You smiled before rubbing his chest again, Jacobs face now looking slightly offended.

“They are pecs…not tiddies, if you’re gonna play with ‘em at least show them some respect by calling them by what they’re called.” Jacob explained, of course he would get defensive over a muscle group. The hunk only knew brawn’s after all. “I’m so sorry your dear pectoral muscles got offended” you leaned down as you began to kiss your boyfriend, his underwear clearly not hiding how we was feeling anymore with the quite obvious poking you feel on your stomach.

The two of you made out until you decided to go lower down the body as you kissed around his neck, then his arms, biceps, back to his chest and nipples, abs, everything. The pleasurable sounds he made definitely let you know the effect you had on him then and there. “Your body is so fucking hot” your voice, slightly muffled as you spoke with your lips to his skin. At this point you already got to his dick, your hand rubbing against it as Jacob softly cursed.

“Can I suck you off?” You said sitting up straight once more as your hands were on the elastic parts of his underwear ready to take them off, his dick practically begging to be let out as it kept twitching. “Oh uh- Y-yeah! What uh…what should I do?” Jacob said slightly puzzled, trying to recollect every scene of porn he’s watched, yet it seemed like every little think he could try and think of wasn’t helping him decide what to do.

“Just lay there and look hot baby, let me do all the work for your first time” You confidently said, despite Jacob being slightly embarrassed at the fact that he has never been apart of explicit congress such as this, yet his confident personality hid a lot of that. You pulled off his last piece of clothing before moving it to the side, you leaned down as you licked the base of his penis while he led your hands back up to his chest, specifically to where his nipples were as if he wanted you to stimulate him up there while also doing it down there.

“Holy shit your fingers feel so good but your mouth is really doing a number down there” Jacob said in one breath, before you finally took his dick into your mouth. You went as far as you could and even just the tip going in was enough for Jacob to groan loudly. His hips began to move back and forth as you continued to rub and slightly pinch at his nipples. You grabbed his chest as a whole not long after as just grabbing his pecs and squishing them yourself was hot in its own way. “God this shouldn’t be so hot” Jacob quietly said with gaps in between as he was trying to not fumble his words from just how good he was feeling.

You were bobbing your head pretty quick, and it didn’t take long before Jacob eventually took a chunk of your hair in his hands and moved you up and down himself. “Take that big fucking dick in that tight fucking throat of yours.” He said as he began thrusting a lot faster, as well as his hips began to quiver a lot more. Only then was it when he stopped abruptly and cum began to leak from the small gaps of your mouth, that he finally let go of your hair.

“Oh my…fucking god, you gotta suck this dick a lot more babe jesus christ.” Jacob heaved as you took yourself off of his cock, cum making its way down your neck slightly. “We always got tonight, or if you want…you can be the one sucking this time.” You smirked while you used your arm to clean the mess that was made off of your body and Jacob was yet again lost in thought knowing the last night spent together at camp at least will be the most remembered for both him and you.

a/n: I finished this at like 3:20AM so if any of the last bits sound weird m so sorry ;-;

[aroaceleovaldez]

Do you have any fun Piper headcanons?

BOY DO I

She wears velcro shoes. they're the gaudiest, tackiest looking ones she could find that fit her from the kid's section. I personally usually like to give her Hello Kitty ones. She wears them cause they're fun and colorful and also ADHD causes problems with fine motor control which can make it hard to tie shoelaces, and the bright colors are great for sensory stuff, so colorful kid's velcro sneakers it is. This is so important to me.

Hair ties! I like to give her two braids down the side of her face tied off with big chunky bright hair ties. My hc with that is that she braids her hair as a stim, and those are just the easiest chunks of hair to braid and unbraid idly (source: that was one of my stims back when i had long hair), plus probably chews on them as another stim (she needs a chew necklace real bad she'll get one eventually). The hair ties being bright colors is once again sensory stimulation from bright colored clothing/accessories go brrr, they bonus as an extra fidget, and also she adores tacky/gaudy stuff and anti-fashion so they go right in with her aesthetic (or lack-there-of).

Okay so yknow how everybody started drawing Piper with beaded earrings. I disagree with the style of earrings everybody gives her - most people go with giving her BIG dangly beaded earrings. I don't think she's a big earrings person, or particularly a dangly earrings person, or at least not a "stylish" big earrings person. I DO however think she'd 100% adore beaded fandom earrings, like these hello kitty ones, or these Kiki's Delivery Service ones.

In general i think she owns so much youtuber merch. It is a solid staple of her wardrobe. The sillier and stupider, the better. She DEFINITELY has the GMM "Everybody knows i love lesbians" merch. She is the target demographic of that ridiculous redbubble merch stuff that's like, a throw blanket that's a collage of insert-youtuber-here's face. Also just general fandom merch. Again, the more ridiculous the better. She hates fashion you KNOW she's mix-and-matching cosplay pieces at least half out of spite just for fun.

She also 100% buys jackbox Tee-KO tshirts and has a whole collection of them.

Because I like giving Piper at least some sense of "I know people who exist outside of the main cast of protagonists" (that is severely lacking in HoO) i like to hc that Shel is an old childhood friend of hers that was like neighbors with her grandpa or something similar, so whenever Piper would visit they would hang out. When Piper moves to Oklahoma they start hanging out again and start dating.

She has very eclectic music tastes. When she was younger it was mostly she hated everything "popular" out of principle but as she got older it's just anything, though a general lean for stuff a la 2000s top hits, cause she is not immune to nostalgia. or late 2000s emo.

Contrary to popular fanon I don't hc that Piper and Leo were "true" friends pre-Hera memory shake-up. I imagine they had one of those school alliances you sometimes make where you see each other every day and you prefer working with them during class versus whoever else but you know like all of 4 things about them including their name and you've never hung out outside of class before. Immediately after their TLH quest they shift to more of a "we are in a new environment (hell of a situation with ADHD/autism) full of strangers (hell. hell on earth) but we know who each other are and are already familiar with one another so. CAMARADERIE." and by the end of the Argo II quest it's a "okay we're ACTUALLY proper friends now." They're not each other's best friends (Piper's is Annabeth and Leo's is Hazel) but they have a VERY strong unique bond of "we've been through this with each other from the beginning, since before all this demigod stuff."

Piper is very "queer label fuckery" to me. She'd LOVE defying boxes and just messing around with all of that. She's digging deep to find niche labels and using atypical combos and it's a really great identity sandbox for her. Also messing around with gendered language in a similar manner.

I don't care what canon says she and Drew eventually warm up to each other and become good siblings to me. Piper unlearns her internalized misogyny and Drew unlearns some of her toxic femininity and they learn to appreciate each other's perspectives - Drew eventually comes to find Piper's perspectives on fashion and the entertainment industry fascinating and Piper respects how outspoken and self-advocating Drew is. They get really into DIY fashion projects together - Piper's goal is to get Drew hooked on alt fashion and it's working.

[poisonlove]

Miss Ortega | j.o

Part 1 part 2 part 3

Part 4

With boredom, I tapped my fingers on the wooden surface of the teachers' lounge desk. The only sound in the room was the ticking of the wall clock.

I must say, this place wasn't bad.

The walls were white, there was a huge desk with a dozen chairs around it, a cabinet with several lockers labeled with the names of the professors, and in one corner of the room, there stood a lonely coffee machine. I wrinkled my nose in disgust when my eyes caught sight of the color scheme of the curtains, a sad plant as decoration on the shelf near the clock.

Meanwhile, I had retrieved my backpack thanks to Enid, as I had forgotten it in the cafeteria. The blonde had asked me what to do, but I simply took the object from her hands and left, leaving her with a surprised look on her face.

"Here I am, sorry for being late," I lifted my head and looked at Jenna. Professor Ortega looked exhausted, and her breathing was heavy from running to make it on time.

"Don't worry, you're on time," I smiled, and she leaned against the wooden door, catching her breath.

In reality, she was five minutes late, but I wasn't going to make a big deal out of it.

"How was it?" I asked. Jenna sighed, raising her hands to convey the gravity of the situation.

"A disaster. I had to remove at least a couple of students from the class who were flirting with me," she rolled her eyes with irritation, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I remember... you didn't have much luck, did you?" I asked rhetorically. Jenna looked at me unfriendlily. I raised my hands in surrender.

"Before we leave... can you do me a favor?" Jenna leaned on the doorframe, looking at me with a clear intention of making me understand that I needed to move.

"Leave?'" I looked at her curiously.

"Never mind. See those lockers? Go to mine and take the stack of papers. They're in a yellow folder," Jenna pointed me in the direction to go, ignoring my question. I walked towards the lockers, reading the surnames before finding "J.Ortega."

"Um... how do I open it?" I looked at the padlock, biting my lip nervously.

"Oh, how silly of me..." she laughed and started rummaging in her backpack. The tip of her tongue was slightly sticking out, as if she was focused on finding something in her bag. She smiled triumphantly when she pulled out a set of keys.

She raised them and proudly showed them to me.

"Here you go." Jenna threw the keyring to me from the other side of the room, and I almost dropped it. I turned my back to Professor Ortega, starting to organize the keys in my hands. There were at least five of them, and one of them was definitely the key to her car.

"The one with the tape," Jenna tiptoed, trying to figure out why it was taking me so long.

I inserted the key with the tape into the lock and smiled when I heard the sound of the locker opening. I opened it and saw a stack of folders. I blinked in surprise and realized that one of these folders seemed to be from our class.

In fact, the yellow folder was our test papers.

I guess she had just put them in her locker because she had them in her backpack a few hours ago. Without thinking too much, I grabbed the stack of papers. I closed the locker and put the keys in my pocket.

I turned around and saw Jenna, who had not only her backpack but also mine on her shoulder.

"Well, now follow me," Jenna gave me a playful smile and took my wrist, dragging me behind her. With flushed cheeks, I tried not to think about the fact that Jenna was holding my hand, focusing instead on not dropping the folder.

We took a few steps before reaching an empty classroom. Sandy, the janitor, looked at us with consternation because he had just finished cleaning. "Don't worry, we won't touch anything," Jenna assured him, giving him a friendly smile.

We entered the room.

Jenna let go of my wrist and sat on the teacher's desk, picking up a forgotten pen between her fingers.

"Can you help me? In the meantime, we can discuss what we're going to do" Jenna reached out her hand, asking me to hand over the yellow folder. A strange sensation buzzed in my veins, excited by the request.

Correcting my classmates' exams? A dream come true.

I nodded several times and sat down next to Jenna, accepting the stack of papers she had given me. Along with them was a pen.

"So... when could you stop by in the afternoon?" Jenna focused her attention on the test in her hands, absentmindedly biting the pen. She raised an eyebrow as she began scribbling some calculations with the red pen.

"On Tuesday?" I looked at the exam in horror. Shaking my head, I started writing the corrections on the side. "And on Friday, I think," I finished the sentence, lifting the corner of my lips sadly.

"I don't have to put the grades, right?" I asked, looking at the paper.

Jenna stopped writing, leaning in my direction to see what I had done. Her hand rested on my knee, putting weight on my leg. She analyzed the test with her gaze and then shook her head. She gave my leg a comforting squeeze before breaking the contact.

My heart raced.

"No, don't worry, I'll take care of the grades" she gave me a shy smile before starting to correct another test.

"Oh my goodness," I exclaimed, placing the test I had taken in my hands on top of the others.

"Her name is Sinclair... the blonde next to you? Your friend?" she asked absentmindedly. Suddenly, I nodded, feeling anxiety grow. She gave me a shy smile.

"For now, it's the only passing grade I've given," she smiled at the great news.

Amidst the chatter and the murmurs of disapproval from some truly unpleasant exams, Jenna and I finished correcting. I looked at the clock and realized that almost an hour had passed.

"Well... that was fun," she exclaimed playfully, rubbing my eyes from tiredness.

"Now I should go, it's getting late," she yawned, and she smiled, nodding timidly.

"Thank you... see you on Friday then? I don't think you need to stop by tomorrow since you're already late today," she stepped down from the desk and took the corrected papers.

I left the keys on the desk.

"Then see you on Friday... no, on Wednesday for the lesson," I smiled, and she winked at me. I picked up my backpack from the floor and started walking towards the school exit.

When I stepped out of the school, I looked up and saw an unfriendly cloud over our city. I started walking since it would be a long walk before I reached home. I tightened the strap of my backpack and sighed from exhaustion.

I wanted to go home and sleep until tomorrow.

A single drop of water fell on the tip of my nose, then another landed on my lips before the rain increased. I didn't even have an umbrella, and the rain was soaking me. I started walking faster, trying to avoid catching a cold from the excessive rain.

A lightning bolt tore through the sky.

I closed my eyes at the loud noise and shivered at the sensation of wet clothes. The sound of a horn made me look towards the street. I squinted my eyes and looked with surprise at the person honking insistently. The passenger window rolled down, and I could see Jenna Ortega sitting on the driver's side.

Professor Ortega, holding the steering wheel with one hand, looked at me with a smile. She leaned over and opened the door.

"How about I give you a ride?" she offered.

I smiled and started seriously considering whether Jenna was an angel.

(...)

The car journey is quite silent.

My eyes were looking out the window, relaxed by the sound of rain falling against the ground. Another shiver ran down my spine from the sensation of wet clothes against my skin. I crossed my arms against my chest, trying to generate as much warmth as possible.

Jenna slows down as she sees the traffic light turn red in the distance.

Occasionally, I could feel her eyes on me, but I was too embarrassed by the situation to think of what to say. I settle back into my seat, tilting my head towards the driver's side.

Did I mention she has a perfect profile? Well... because she has a perfect profile. Her eyes slightly gleamed as she looked at the street, and her lips formed a shy smile. Our gazes met, holding for a couple of seconds.

The traffic light turned green.

"Straight ahead, right?" she asked absentmindedly, shifting gears by moving the lever upward. I mumble in response, tucking a completely wet strand of hair away from my face.

Professor Ortega sighs and leans forward with her free hand to click the radio button, almost as if to break the silent atmosphere. The sweet and melancholic notes of "Golden Hour" resonate in the car.

"I like this song," she admits, turning the knob to increase the volume. I looked at her with an open mouth, surprised that she knows this song.

"Do you know it?" the question sounded more aggressive than I intended, and she glances at me, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm only 23, I'm not that old," she says, with a tone as natural as if it were the least strange thing in the world. I open my eyes, incredulous at her words.

"We're only 5 years apart?!" I exclaim, and Jenna, seeing my reaction, bursts into laughter.

It was the second time I heard her laugh, even if it happened on the same day, but despite that, it seemed like the most beautiful thing in the world. Her eyes narrowed almost as if she were squinting, and the dimples on her face formed perfectly. Her nose twitched slightly, and her head leaned forward almost reflexively, her shoulders vibrating with the deafening and angelic laughter. Jenna looked at me, thoroughly amused.

I almost felt satisfied to be the cause of this harmonious sound.

I clear my throat, looking out the window, embarrassed by the intensity.

"To the left..." I whisper, still in shock. I could see in the distance the row of houses, and among them, mine. A red roof, completely restored. Jenna stops on the side of the street, turning off the car.

I grab the backpack that was resting on my feet, turning towards Jenna.

"Thanks for the ride," I affirm, and she raises her lower lip as a hint of a smile, shaking her head reassuringly.

"Don't worry, it's been a pleasure."

I look at Jenna in confusion as she unfastens her seatbelt. The dark-haired woman turns towards me, leaning slowly towards my body. The beats of my heart increase recklessly, surprised by the sudden gesture. Her brown eyes almost fervently gaze at the lower part of my face, precisely my lips. Our noses brush against each other, and my breath gets stuck in my throat. A mischievous smile spreads across her lips, immediately capturing the attention of my eyes.

Full and perfect lips.

One of her hands moves in my direction, to the side of my head. I close my eyes, relaxing and anticipating the contact between our mouths.

My first kiss.

The click of the door opening behind me makes me open my eyes in confusion.

I open my eyes with a sudden realization.

Jenna returned to her seat, looking at me with confusion. She most likely saw my cheeks completely red.

Oh my god, how could I think she would kiss me? She's my damn calculus teacher!

My lungs suddenly need as much oxygen as possible, and it felt impossible. I felt trapped in this car.

I had to get out of here.

I unbuckled my seatbelt and instinctively leaned forward, thanking Jenna with a kiss on the cheek. The professor opens her eyes in surprise. The contact of my lips on her cheek lasted only a few seconds, so brief that I almost doubted if I had kissed her.

I immediately regret it, seeing her eyes looking at me with a mix of confusion and amusement, her gaze softening. With difficulty, I get out of the car, with the clear intention of leaving before doing something completely stupid.

I reach the door of my house and ring the bell. While I wait for someone to open, Jenna's BMW starts and drives away.

This is bullshit.

***

Before I knew it, Wednesday had already arrived. With my backpack on my back and walking sadly towards school, I listened to "death bed coffee for your head" playing in my headphones.

Let's just say I wasn't very excited about going to school today... because I was going to see Jenna in the last period. I had a clear feeling that I had messed everything up the other day, and I was embarrassed at the thought of crossing her wonderful brown eyes.

Damn it, another compliment.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, clutching my backpack. The production of the song was interrupted when I saw Enid approaching in the distance, full of energy.

"Hey..." I said sadly, taking off my headphones. The blonde looked at me with confusion.

"Is something wrong?" she asked, immediately noticing my mood.

And what if something is wrong? The thing is, in just two damn days, I've developed feelings for my Calculus teacher... I had the illusion that she would kiss me... I kissed her on the cheek, and I was terrified to see her.

Of course, I wasn't going to tell her that.

"Nothing... I haven't slept very well... you know... nightmares," I shrugged indifferently, adjusting my school uniform collar. Not only did I have to wear a stupid, horribly striped black and purple uniform, but I also had an annoying knot that prevented me from breathing.

Damn tie.

It was also about two degrees or so... in other words, freezing cold.

"Did this nightmare have brown eyes and a charming smile?" Enid asked absentmindedly, putting an arm around my shoulders.

I tensed up at her words but tried not to show it. I had forgotten that Enid was very perceptive when it came to reading people. I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye and slowly shook my head.

"No, actually, I lost count of how many eyes the monster had," I said hastily, inventing an unbelievable excuse.

"Sure..." she looked at me with narrowed eyes, pushing a strand of hair away from her face.

"Hey, girls!" someone shouted.

We turned towards the sound of the voice and saw Ajax and Xavier. The guy with the beret approached Enid, putting an arm around her waist. The blonde got distracted and turned towards her boyfriend, their lips meeting in a sweet kiss.

Xavier and I made a disgusted sound.

The misunderstood and artistic guy from Nevermore stood by my side, greeting me with a nod.

I managed to avoid Enid's interrogation.

"Mind if I steal her, T/N?" Ajax asked, smiling at Enid. I pretended to gag when I saw the blonde's eyes shine with love and mischief. I removed Enid's hand from my shoulder, and the oldest of the group took the blonde's free hand, interlacing their fingers, and ran off laughing through the school gardens.

"Well... it's just you and me," Xavier blushed, covering his cheeks with his long hair. I laughed nervously, walking through the gates of Nevermore. I knew Xavier had feelings for me, but I only saw him as a friend... a little brother, and I didn't want to disappoint him.

"Do we have Art now?" I swallowed nervously. Xavier nodded.

I took a few steps, and my eyes widened when I saw Jenna in the distance.

My cheeks turned red, and I stood frozen in place. Jenna Ortega was talking animatedly with her coworker. My heart raced with nervousness and, at the same time, captivated by the sight of her.

Today, Professor Ortega was dressed casually.

She wore a simple oversized pink hoodie, ripped jeans at the knees, and white Air Force sneakers.Her hair was tied up in a messy ponytail.

The absence of heels accentuated her height.

I grabbed Xavier's arm and started walking down the hallway when I saw Jenna turning in our direction. I relaxed, knowing that I had avoided the dark-haired woman, and let out a sigh of relief as I walked towards our class.

(...)

I managed to avoid Jenna in various ways, but I couldn't avoid her in the last class. I sighed and entered the classroom, bowing my head when I saw Jenna sitting in the chair in front of the desk.

I felt extremely guilty when I saw a smile spreading across her lips. Damn, that oversized sweatshirt made her so adorable.

"Hey..." she said, almost nervously.

I remained silent, avoiding her gaze. I focused on looking towards the back of the class, and disappointment washed over me when I saw Enid and Spenser sitting together, occupying my usual spot. The girl still had a red nose as a symbol of her cold, and Enid was enthusiastically talking with her friend.

I felt so betrayed.

Impatiently, I took the only available seat, right in front of the lectern. I placed my backpack on the floor and felt a bit frustrated. Jenna looked at me with a raised eyebrow, seemingly trying to figure out what was going on.

"Are you okay?" she asked, standing up and putting her hands in the pockets of her sweatshirt. I held back a smile as I found her adorable and nodded my head. Jenna made a face of concern when I didn't respond. She looked at me with stern eyes, her jaw clenched, almost annoyed.

If I acted cold, maybe I could avoid talking to Jenna.

"I'm fine," I replied coldly, avoiding eye contact. I grabbed my pencil case and notebook, ready for the lesson.

Jenna huffed and made a strange sound in her throat.

In my peripheral vision, I saw her hand dangerously approaching, and my eyes widened when I saw her target. Jenna's hand grabbed mine and made me stand up from the chair. I tried to remain calm as I followed Jenna walking towards the classroom exit, our hands intertwined. A pleasant sensation fluttered in my stomach, and I ignored the soft touch of her palm against mine.

Before crossing the door, I saw Enid getting up from her seat, looking at me with concern.

"Excuse us," Jenna's request sounded stern as she tried to pass through the students who were rushing to their classes.

I looked at Jenna and unintentionally smiled when I realized she was slightly taller than me.

The Professor Ortega reached a closet and opened the door. She forcefully closed it, seeking privacy, and let go of our intertwined hands, crossing her arms over her chest.

"What's going on?" she looked at me seriously, her jaw clenched.

"Nothing... Can we go back to class? We have a lesson," I glanced distractedly at the door, feeling the need to escape from that cramped space.

"Otherwise, I'm the teacher... so you'll stay here," she stared at me, her irises filled with anger. "Why have you been avoiding me since this morning? And don't say you haven't been, because I know you have been avoiding me." Her gaze softened, her brown eyes shining with sadness.

"I...," I took a deep breath.

If I want to get out of here, I have to tell the truth.

"I don't know... I was afraid I made you feel uncomfortable the other day," I confessed, feeling a weight lifted off my chest.

Jenna relaxed, giving me a shy smile. "You didn't make me feel uncomfortable... if that was the problem... well, you can rest assured," she shrugged, smiling again.

"Okay," I smiled, relieved.

"T/N... Next time, speak instead of running away, okay? After all, I'm your teacher... I can help you with anything," she looked at me with doe eyes, absentmindedly biting her lower lip.

And that was the problem... that you're my teacher... Jenna.

"Now... Shall we go back to class? I think the others must be wondering where we've been," I affirm, swallowing nervously.

Jenna nods timidly, and we leave the closet, walking back to the classroom, this time feeling a weight lifted off our shoulders.

Or maybe not entirely.

(...)

"So... a line integral or path integral is an integral where the function being integrated is evaluated along a path or curve," I repeat, glancing at Jenna across the room.

It had been three weeks since the last turbulent encounter with Professor Ortega in the closet, and since then, we had been maintaining a practically perfect relationship without any misunderstandings. Twice a week, we would meet in the empty classroom, studying advanced mathematics for the upcoming end-of-year exam. It seemed that this competition was going to take place in late March, right on the eve of graduation.

I place the bottom of the pen between my lips, feeling both exhausted and satisfied with my work.

Jenna walks in my direction. Her black boots come into view, and I slowly examine her with my gaze. Today, Jenna is wearing a green-and-white plaid skirt that reaches just above mid-thigh, matching her green polo. I almost feel like crying under her attentive and intimidating gaze.

She playfully taps my cheek, smiling with all 32 teeth.

"You see, after two hours, you finally figured it out," she asks rhetorically, and I look away from her inappropriate comment. I gently remove her hand from my face and stand up from the chair, completely tired.

I glance at the clock and sigh, realizing once again that it's gotten late.

"We should meet somewhere else... I practically live in this school," I mutter to myself, clenching my jaw to hide my displeasure.

"You're right," Jenna comments, and I turn towards her direction. I didn't think she would hear me. Professor Ortega puts the book in her backpack and looks at me with a slight smile on her lips.

"If it's not too... strange," she begins, pausing briefly, almost regretting what she said. "We can meet at my place," she concludes, putting the backpack on her back.

My eyes widen, and my cheeks turn red. A pleasant sensation spreads down my spine at the mere thought of staying at Jenna's house. Professor Ortega shakes her head, somewhat disappointed that I didn't give an immediate response.

"Well... I just... should know the address," I scratch the back of my neck nervously.

Jenna lets out a sigh of relief and smiles. She takes her phone from her bag and walks towards me, looking at her device. "How about I give you my number?" Her fingers tap something on the screen, most likely responding to a message.

"So, I'll send it to you on WhatsApp," she concludes, looking at me through her long lashes.

I nod my head, still speechless.

Jenna hands me her phone, a beautiful iPhone 14. I see that she has already opened the contact. Glancing at Jenna, I enter my number, feeling a bit surprised. I hand the phone back to the brunette, and she puts it in her bag.

"Well... then we'll catch up," she gives me a smile, revealing her dimples. Walking past me and always tilting her head with a smile on her lips, she exits the room.

Jenna... she asked for my number.

(...)

When I left school, I saw Enid leaning against the door of her new car. The blonde waved at me and walked in my direction, wrapping her arms around my neck.

I returned the hug, relaxing under her touch. Enid breaks the hug, jumping with happiness.

"Are you ready?" Enid takes my backpack from my hands, opens the trunk, and carelessly throws it in. She squeals and takes my hand, making me get into the passenger side.

"Ready? Ready for what?" I look at the blonde with confusion and fasten my seatbelt.

"For a party, of course." She inserts the key into the lock and starts the car. I widen my eyes and shake my head.

"At... 8 PM?" I said incredulously.

"No, I want to go home," I admit, and Enid mutters, bored. She shifts gears and drives towards the exit of Nevermore, crossing the iron gates.

"It's Friday... T/N, it's been ages since we went to a party together... lately, you've been studying too much, really too much," she absentmindedly bites her lower lip.

She turns towards me, looking at me with pleading eyes.

"Alright... but we'll stay for a couple of hours, and then we go home... but... WATCH OUT!" I grip the seatbelt tightly when I see Enid running the red light.

Who the hell gave her a license?

"So, party?" she smiled, exhilarated by the victory. "Where are we going?" I catch my breath, relieved that I'm still alive. Enid turns back towards me.

"Look at the road," I add, still scared. Enid grips the steering wheel tightly, showing me her new nail polish combination.

"At Edward's house," she says, shrugging indifferently. Her eyes sparkle with excitement. "Edward?" I ask, sighing in frustration.

"He's an idiot... but he throws good parties," the blonde admits, and I fall silent, not knowing what else to add.

In the distance, we see Edward Smith's huge house, and despite the late hour of the party, people can already be seen entering his house. Extravagant lights invade the neighborhood, and deafening music resonates from meters away.

Enid parks, and we get out of the car, walking towards the entrance of the house. A notification on my phone prompts me to take it out of my pocket, and I furrow my brow when I see that I have received a phone number from an unknown sender.

*Unknown*

"Hi! It's Jenna, well... this is my number."

I smile and save her number, amused that she felt the need to specify whose number it was.

"Hi Jenna, I'm T/N."

A few seconds later, I receive a message from her.

Jenna*: Really? Don't tell me :/

Silly :3

I put my phone back in my pocket and enter the house, ready to let loose but with a smile on my lips.