#(you see that personally)
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Oh…. Well, it’s over for Crunchyroll I guess
#Crunchyroll#piracy#funimation#money hungry ass streaming service#rambling#I’ve never paid for a streaming service in my life thank god#I appreciated using others accounts but I personally cannot see myself paying this much for a service if I had the funds 😭!#get back to pirating kings!!!#anime has always been one of the easiest forms of media to pirate anyway so y’all got this#CR is definitely not worth paying for though#CR is certainly not worth paying this much for even if it’s a yearly one time fee#capitalism#the fact that CR has always had pretty bad quality as a streaming service anyway#it buffers every time you pause or rewind anything
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one thing that took me embarrassingly long to learn is "sometimes when people say things, they will not be true."
I used to tell people about this revelation and they'd be like yeah.....duh.....but like, why wouldn't my base assumption be that you're communicating to me in a straightforward manner. anyway, I get scammed a lot.
#example: a 'friend' in middle school told me I should ask a guy out. she said 'he'll totally say yes'.#he did not. which was the obvious outcome#but it took me years to realize that she'd said that hoping to fuel some drama for her own entertainment.#ANOTHER EXAMPLE#a guy in college approached me saying that he'd been seeing me around campus but was always too shy to talk to me#and that he really wanted to get to know me#so I was like wow 🥺 romance 🥺 and hopped into bed with him#and afterward I was like what do you wanna do 😊 should we see a movie 😊 should we go out 😊#and he was like nope. byeeee.#and I realized I got bamboozled into sex#total shocked pikachu face#I'm still not the best at this tbh. I'm like 'why would this person lie to me. lying is bad'.#anyway this is why I not looking forward to entering the dating world again#DONT BAMBOOZLE ME I'M GULLIBLE
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if you’re ever in the position to choose between giving up and accepting defeat, and actually trying to fight the ancient unkillable god that is about to peel apart reality like a string cheese, remember this: scientifically speaking, you might as well give it a shot!
1.there were trees at the beginning of the world! there were trees so long ago that they predate bacteria that causes wood to decay. when a tree fell, it would lie there in stasis and there wasn’t any way of breaking down wood xylem on a molecular level in that way.
2. it seems obvious to say, but wood eating bacteria are literally incapable of comprehending what they’re breaking down. It’s just not information conciously available to a microorganism. they don’t know what they’re deconstructing, where it came from, bacteria have no way to even fathom the existence of a tree as a concept.
3. Regardless of the facts above, the world we live in today is a world where wood inevitably decomposes
it is worth fighting the unkillable god no matter how pointless it seems. it is worth taking the risk even though youre trying to accomplish something impossible. the reality in which you live was also once reality in which trees didn’t rot. You live in a reality that allows for existence before the possibility of destruction. you live in a reality where uncomprehending microbes break down matter that is so far beyond the scope of their comprehension that it feels comical to specify something so obvious. you live in a reality that occasionally allows unshakeable physical truths to be altered with no warning.
It is worth fighting the unkillable god because trees are so old they predate the source of their destruction, and it still did not spare them. It is worth fighting the unkillable god because bacteria rots unthinkingly, because there is room in our cosmos for destruction without comprehension on the part of the destroyer. It is worth fighting the unkillable god because now and then reality retracts the promise of immortality without fanfare, and when that happens there is no mercy for the ancient. the unmaking is not softer for the desecrators ignorance. for all things, existence is endless until the exact point where it ends.
so you might as well try to kill the unkillable god. it doesn’t seem likely, but at the beginning of the world, trees didn’t rot. so you never know! you never know
#bazinga!#I’ve been meaning to add these tags for a minute but it was too funny to keep the original line bazinga tag#if you see this i would appreciate this post not be tagged as wornld building#and if you want to use this concept in your D&D campaign#you don’t need to show this post or anything#but if you would please mention after the plot line ends that the original post was written all at once in a pretty desperate state#i thought about ginkgo trees while walking my dog late that night#and when i found myself hopeless and completely alone at midnight#I opened tumblr and talked to myself#and hit post#and went to bed#then it got 2000 notes and i woke up to the realization that the entire time I had said bacteria#when i fully meant fungus#fuck!!!#u don’t need to say all that just please include the context that this is a very personal post#thank u!#I’m not mad it’s not obvious from the post that i was ranting into the void
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BDS added this section to their boycott page and I think people really need to read it:
[source]
please remember, pushing unorganized boycotts without carefully fact-checking every company in the list can be actively HARMFUL to the boycott movement.
#a reminder seeing that people were tagging that BDS post with companies that aren’t on the list#if you want to personally avoid a certain company the fine#but STOP promoting grassroots boycotts over the actual boycott list!!!!!
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People liking your personal OCs is still such a crazy feeling, I've been doing this for years and ppl asking about them still fills my entire heart with warmth and idk how to handle it
You enjoy this fictional guy I made up for fun?? Whose only content is random artwork or writing made by me and a handful of other artists at most? They have no show/book/game with a large fandom, it's just one person with an art blog?? I love u
#i do the same to others OCs I like I will ask all about em#if its my friends OC they probably have a free seat in my brain#kott talks#edit: ppl tagging this post with how personal and important their characters are to them as creators#and positive feedback hits deep because of it#I see you and I'm so happy for u
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Listen man, you guys can't be like "you guys need to be normal about asexuality" and then turn around and get weirdly judgemental when you find out someone doesn't have sex by choice. Like that's weird that some of you do that.
#like I love sex im glad we're hyping it up#but also genuinely some of you have got to learn how to be normal around people who dont want to have sex#even if you're not talking about asexuality when you say stuff like that you're still being a weirdass#im not ace myself but i keep seeing posts that come across like they're taking it personally that other people don't want to have sex#it sounds like theyre trying to prove something to someone
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Hey now, Let her cook!
#dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#senshi#laios touden#marcille donato#izutsumi#oyasumi punpun#<- In case you are wondering what the source for the little bird guy is.#Yeah that's right. I'm back to my extremely obscure crossover BS.#Punpun is one of those series that falls under the category of 'Good! but I cannot responsibly recommend this to anyone."#If Dungeon Meshi is like a friend asking you to go on a quick errand and you accidently go on a life changing roadtrip -#Punpun is your friend asking to go on a quick errand and they pull up to the vet and tell you your dog is being put down.#Then they explode into sludge. Melting your car. You hitchhike back but the person who picked you up is an axe murderer.#I could not finish it. My friends who did say it was good. But agree it was for the best I did not finish it.#Hey speaking of tone twists...We are one episode away from one of my favourite chapters being animated!#WHO'S READY FOR THE SENSHI BACKSTORY! WHO IS READY TO CRY!#ME! I AM! I spooked my flatmate with how energetic I was this morning. I'm vibrating with energy I was not designed to contain.#I should talk about today's episode here: It was very good. I love how they animated the familiars.#And!!! Anime only people now are in the loop on the Chilchuck lore. Part 1 of many. He still contains multitudes.#They all do to be honest! If this episode told us anything it was that we still don't know these characters as well as we think!#See you guys next week. I'll be inconsolable.
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you said you were stuck in a time loop, which was fine. i feel like late-stage capitalism has us all in a time loop, ammiright? you came barging in at 5:33. in the morning. i hadn't even processed the idea of coffee.
but you had this look of utter panic in your eyes. terror like the ocean. you grabbed my cheeks. im in a time loop.
i don't know why in movies the first reaction is to deny it. when someone is panicking like that, it's not appropriate to ask them to calm down. it didn't matter if i believed it, what mattered was that you believed it so much that it was consuming you.
so here we are. i pour you some of the dark roast. "you look like utter and entire hell," i say.
you push your fingers into your eyes. "you always say that."
i try to think of something funny to say that i wouldn't have said on previous time loops, but jokes don't land without the proper timing (lol). "remind me to think -"
"-yeah, of a joke that only works in the future. and before you say anything, i know you're pissed i just stole your punchline." you bolt the coffee, which is wild. it's very hot. you don't seem to notice.
i blow on mine to cool it down. i both am very pissed at you and also i can't see you in this amount of panic without wanting to help. but i'm also not really sure what we are, not since i saw you kiss her like that, no offense. it just was like, kind of rude when you knew i liked you.
and besides. i'm just like, barely a person. i write omegaverse fanfiction. i love the concept of a time loop, but what the fuck am i gonna do? send an alpha in there? i open my mouth.
you point at me. "you're about to ask why me. and then say some disparaging shit about yourself. i'm just a nerd who plays dnd or something. that self-own is slightly different each time." you sigh. "i know you think you can't really help me. i don't know who can help me. i only came to you because you fucking believe me." you check your watch, sigh, and throw your head back. you cover your eyes with one hand. "i've come here on 26 separate revolutions," you say. "you have believed me every time. and yeah, i have no idea how you fit into this but i just -" you sigh again. "i just like fucking talking to someone about it."
"do you need more cof-" i start, but you're already holding the empty cup out. i frown at it. "you're not getting any more until you promise not to bolt this one like an animal."
you laugh a little and sit up, pushing your hair out of your face. "okay, that's new dialogue. but to be fair to you, i'm not usually this rude. i'm still pretty new at all of this." you check your watch again. another sigh. i guess you're cruising for a personal best in the Sigh Olympics.
i almost tell you im not an NPC but i've played enough video games to know i'm very much an NPC. i pour you another cup. "so what happens in the loop?"
"really bad explosion." you mutter into the mug. you put your elbows on the table (rude) and bury your face in your arms like an angsty teenager. one hand floats up while you talk, because evidently you literally can't talk without your hands. "i have to save the day and there's this bomb and i have no bomb training and it keeps moving, you know."
"do i die?"
you peek up from your arms. "yeah. bigtime. you keep trying to run or stay or do anything and you always super die."
"oh."
"to be fair, like, everyone dies in it though.... so you're in good company."
i hate that you make me laugh. i hate that being around you always feels tingly and strange, this electric tension between us. something that is evidently (given how you stuck your tongue down a stranger's throat literally 3 days ago) (well. 3 for me) super one-sided. i take a sip of my coffee and close my eyes.
i die today, i guess. a little spark of panic starts at the top of my hands and starts whipping up my wrists.
"shit," you say. you look at your watch and jump to your feet. "i have to go. if i can come back, i will. i am still trying to figure out when is best to do everything, you know? the order of stuff. maybe morning isn't good for us."
i look up at you and think about how you keep kissing me in the back of my car and in alleyways and in the dark. and i can never fucking get a read on you. and i also think about how incredibly panicked you look. how broken. how long have you been doing this? "i don't want to die," i say.
you glance downwards. "well, you're not really dead, you'll come back in the loop."
"but i will have died." my hands are shaking. i am trying really hard to stay calm.
you push your hands through your hair again. "i really have to go. i will have this discussion with the next version of you, though. it is like, something i am thinking about."
"but i don't get a next version," i say. i don't really have the language for this, because i haven't had 26 tries with you. i only have my memories: you, a week ago. drunk and telling me you loved me in my ear. you, kissing her anyway. you, months ago, throwing up on my birthday, whispering to me i ruin everything i touch, always, over and over. please don't ask. i can't ever fucking have that be you.
i run my finger along the rim of the mug. "i don't want to die in this one."
you seem baffled by this. "i get that but - time will reset, you'll be fine, you won't even remember we talked about this."
"but i know now." i stand up too. "i have to live the rest of this day knowing i could die. knowing i probably am going to."
"you could always die, to be fair."
i feel my hands get out of control. "earlier, you said i always say a different insult about myself. what if you're just going through different parallel universes and those are all just different - but real - versions of myself? what if you're not in a time loop, you're in a fucking universe loop?"
"if it helps, i've wondered this too. also, you're hot in all of them. if that helps."
i point at you. "no flirting. i'm trying to figure out if i die today."
"who's flirting?" you catch my wild hands and give me that long, perfect smile. like we're in this together. "i won't let ya die." you check your watch and sigh again. "well. maybe not this time."
i grit my teeth. you are so not making quips at me while i try to explain the existential dread i'm having. "does the time loop reset if i fucking kill you?"
"honestly i don't know how long it continues after i die, because i just wake up. it could be that the loop goes until the explosion for everyone, and we're all in the loop, or it could be that when i die, the loop restarts. when i die i wake up, is all."
i pull away from you and stalk into the kitchen and start doing all 3 of my dishes. "okay, first, you know i was joking. and secondly, this is exactly my point. you don't know if this is just a parallel universe. maybe in the ones where you died, the explosion happened and nobody reset and it's just you travelling." i have to stop and push the heel of my palm into my eyeball. "... how often have you died?"
i look at you. you look at me. you give me this very sad, halfway smile and a little what can ya do shrug. something in that action seems so old and weary that i want to burst into tears.
"i have to go," you say. "really. for real. there's this family of five i save from getting into a car crash. and i know it's like oh but we're all gonna die in the explosion anyway, what's the point. and..." you shrug again. "it matters to me, is all. at least i saved them for now. at least i saved anything."
you pad over to me and wrap me in a tight hug. you always seem so tall against me. i feel your cheek rest against the top of my head for a moment. for a second, it's just us, and the space is warm, and my heart is a little broken hare.
you leave me there, and i stand in my stupid badly lit kitchen with my stupid mugs. i think about you. i start texting my mom that she needs to get out of the city, but it feels pointless.
i don't know what to do. tomorrow is the same day for you. but i have to prepare to die in my today.
#warm up#prose#i just realized that there's a horror film in there about being someone NOT in a loop.#if i wanted to make it longer i'd have them come back like SUPER battered and hellish.#on round like 999#like halfway through lunch like - YOU . I LOVE U . IM SORRY . I RUINED IT BC I LOVE U CANT U SEE THAT#but like. yeah man what happens when someone else in control of ur destiny#what happens to all the versions of u that DO die...#i also wanted a pre-redemption time looper - this person#(who in my brain is they/them)#is absolutelyyyyyy toying with the narrator bc the time looper is caught up in like#an emo angsty '' i can't have what i want bc i ruin things'' self harm spiral#and like literally the way out of that spiral is to TRY bud.#but this is a person pre-redemption. still kind of an ass. still not really listening to her#still a little bit ignoring that they kissed someone 3 days ago#still KNOWS she likes them and DOES like her back. but is just too chickenshit still.#we're talkin that person we've ALL dated that's like ''i can't be with u anymore bc i am Too Broken and I Can't Stand Hurting U"#... i imagine they grow up tho. eventually.
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ALSO IMPORTANT TO NOTE, people dropping mad mad sums of money on gfms and charities and stuff are extremely impressive but that DOES NOT MEAN that putting like $5 towards someone's fund or any good cause is any less valuable, a lot of crowdfunding is about momentum and those single digits add up super fast, you do not need to be Rolling In The Dough to make someone's day!! moving the dial at all is extremely positive!!
#what is ACTUAL POISON to crowdfunding is The Full Stop. when it just runs cold. at that point a single dollar coming in feels like#pushing the wheels out of the mud. all you need is movement. as long as it keeps moving.#this applies to gofundmes this applies to large organizations this applies to people asking for grocery money#moving the needle even just the slightest bit!! is huge!!#take it from someone who gets excited about $1 patrons#sergle.txt#people used to attach Apology messages to their $5 when I was raising money for my breast reduction#as if they should be doing more. but they were already doing so much and I was elated to just see a new donation Of Any Amount#ANY donation is extremely exciting to the person or people actually receiving it!!!!
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It’s important to go through the vetted fundraisers list regularly & see what families have little to no funds. This could be for any number of reasons, like language barriers or maybe not being familiar w Tumblr. Either way we shouldn’t expect families to know how to market themselves in order to platform. This shouldn’t rely on networking & connections. As many fundraisers as possible should get their turn in being promoted and circulated. Appealing to you first should not be a prerequisite
#Don’t forget about the families w little to no funds please#and if you can adopt a campaign that has absolutely nothing that’s so much the better#One person can’t give everyone their fair runtime so this has to be the effort of multiple ppl#stresses me out so much when I see a family w nothing
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BTW... PSA.... even if we arent mutuals if youre in my notes regularly theres a Very high chance i am still fond of you. yes im vaguing someones tags on the compliment the person u rbed this from post. but like. positive vaguing? THE POINT IS im weird abt following ppl but IM STILL SENDING U FOND VIBES...
#i have to acclimate myself into following people. first i have to spend a few days to weeks checking someones blog manually#and i cant follow too many new people in the same burst or else theres TOO MUCH new unfamiliarity on my dash#and i become a small and easily frightened beast alarmed by change#also im just....................... incredibly picky kjhsdkjjkdsj sometimes ppl i generally am :)! towards do occasionally rb#from someone who i want to throw bricks at. and then i cant follow them but im still :)! when i see them in notifs#and sometimes its just that im going AAAA!!! AAAA!!! and cant put more new things on my dash#or in some cases its someone im fond of seeing/chatting w whenever we have talked BUT they simply are also into stuff im not rly into#and i dont want it on my dash despite liking them as a person. etc. you know how it is#ALL OF WHICH TO SAY................... :)!#rimi talks
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my fan fiction graph
#mfw i care about character analysis but i also like to see boys kissing so im stuck here with you dumb virgins etc etc#PERSONAL TASTE DISCLAIMER this isnt a moral judgement just documenting what i see#ok to rb
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Good luck during pride month to all the aroaces who are gonna be blasted with "love is love" everywhere
Edit:
This post includes aplatonic people, loveless aros and any other people who fall anywhere on the aro and ace spectrum.
Stop saying "but theres platonic love and familial love-"
#nothing wrong with love is love but pls being queer isnt just about loving someone#it can also be about the lack of love im certain aspects of peoples lives etc.#idk if that explains it very well but whatever#pride month#lgbtqia#aroace#aromantic#asexual#this goes to anyone on the aro and/or ace spectrum btw#anyway have fun during pride month everyone i hope you have a great time#im turning the reblogs back on#but if i see one person say any shit abouy platonic love im disabling it agaain
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I guess Chilchuck has brought us right back to 'adults who are short are child-coded and if you like them you're a pedophile' discourse huh
#spitblaze says things#anyway.#1) please google 'halfling'#2) THERE ARE ADULTS WHO ARE VERY SHORT. DID YOU KNOW THAT. WERE YOU AWARE#3) THERE ARE ALSO ADULTS WHO HAVE CHILDLIKE FACES. DID YOU KNOW *THAT*#4) IF YOU THINK THE ONLY REASON A MAN COULD LOOK LIKE THAT IS BECAUSE THEY ARE TRANS MEN IM GOING TO KILL YOU#5) jesus christ will you just read/watch dungeon meshi and understand that the entire conceit of his character and of half-foots in general#is that its fucked up to treat people as children or subhuman because they do not 'look' like what you expect a cisgender adult to look lik#anyway if i see one more person call Chilchuck 'has gray streaks and an ex wife and three adult daughters' Tims a sh*ta#im gonna start smashing things#doin numbers
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Toy chica and Abby are gonna be besties in FNAF 2
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#fnaf 2 movie#fnaf 2#toy chica#abby schmidt#GIRLS NIGHT 💗💗💗#I hope you chica is super fun in the fnaf 2 film#her being sporty and party girl core#I just can see upon meeting Abby she just wants to do girl activities with her#dance eat cupcakes party#very slumber party core even#I think this personality works best with toy chica#spunky and very girlypop#she did just make Abby look just like her#but who wouldn’t want to have her style ✨✨
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i finally finished reading I see you, Sundrop! by @shirajellyfish and IT'S SO GOOD I CAN'T BELIEVE IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO FINISH IT RAAAAAAA
i will be gushing about it in the tags but here's a lil animation i made based on the below paragraph in chapter 6 that gave me such a strong mental image that i had to make it real :)
#fnaf#fnaf sb#fnaf dca#dca fandom#fnaf sun#i see you sundrop#doodle dump#dynamic dump#IT’S SOO GOOD Y’ALL IT’S AWESOME IT MAKES ME AHDKLSLLLFJSL#one of my favorite fics for sure. it ticks off all the boxes of things i like in a story it’s crazy#the way the animatronics are described… their funky ways of thinking…. the sheer amount of detail is just *explosion sounds*#riley leaning hard on ‘how does a good friend act?’ and growing as a person because of it IS EVERYTHING AUUUGH#I LOVE EVERY PART OF IT i will be rereading it so many times forever and ever it’s so GOOOOD!!!#thank you shira for writing and sharing such an awesome creation <3 <3 <3
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