#(which may or may not include salsa depending on who you ask)

[riverstardis]

a clear conscience:

ethan comes in with headphones in dancing and cal follows him in and goes “are you dancing?” “yes. i’ve joined a salsa class. i am now a student of the latin beat.” ahshdjfjfk

also that suggests they got to work separately despite arriving at the same time doesn’t it? i suppose living together doesn’t mean they have to travel together. actually it might be a night shift which would make more sense, ethan could’ve just come straight from said salsa class

cal tells him to give it up because he’s got no rhythm and he goes “oh ye of little faith” shfkgk i love him

oh wait that means this is jack’s last ep

oh yeah it is the night shift

big mac’s out of painkillers so he’s in a terrible mood and he offers to put away the new drug stock😬

cal shows ethan how the dancing’s done lmao and jack goes “not so fast jezebel he’s mine” and iain goes “i think you’re barking up the wrong tree there, jack” and he says “oh please, look at those moves. the hips don’t lie” sjskakjdf

ooo charlie’s discovered there’s tramadol missing and calls everyone round to say they’re now gonna treat it like a controlled drug and asks if anyone has anything to tell him and cal’s like “i do! it’s my brother… he can’t dance” SJDKFKF

ethan’s practicing his mambo while waiting outside for an ambulance😭😭

jack keeps getting sprayed with bodily fluids. first vomit then blood😭

rita got a complaint from a patient she doesn’t even remember saying she was rude and then she gets a threatening text and she’s sure it’s mark :(

how on earth does charlie not realise it’s big mac stealing the drugs at this point like he keeps finding him by the drugs or in suspicious places😭 unless he does and he’s just biding his time

jez saying “he just says i’m greedy because i get the best of both worlds” and iain goes “you are greedy! you ate that last doughnut” SJAKSJKD

mac coming clean to noel :(

charlie asks rita if she’s okay and she says “i will be when they get all these guns off the streets” “maybe we should do what the americans do and put metal detectors on the doors” “yeah or we could raise our boys to be better men” so true

jack’s packing up and says he hasn’t got the stomach for medicine and needs to get back to the glitz and glamour of the travel industry “the only guns i wanna see are on the hunky lifeguards strutting about in their teeny tiny trunks” noel goes “you can see that here. if a swim team goes down with food poisoning” 💀💀

noel’s gonna help big mac get clean🥺

they’re all going to breakfast to say bye to jack and ethan’s still dancing and cal’s like “right you need to stop watching dirty dancing and hang up your cuban heels mate before you get injured. my advice.” and ethan just goes “right. louise, can i borrow you for a second?” and he dances with her, spins her and dips her😭😭

cal goes “very impressive nibbles, very impressive” and ethan goes “yes, thank you, nobody puts baby brother in the corner” and cal looks so unimpressed😭😭😭

lmaoo jack goes and stands in front of a billboard with a picture of a beach and says “this time next week i’m gonna be lying on that beach! in your face, boys!” and then an ambulance goes past and through a puddle, splashing him with water shskakkdkf

aww big mac gets up to the door of the NA meeting but turns away at the last moment :(

uh oh rita gets home and finds her bedroom completely trashed with “YOU WILL SUFFER” written in lipstick on the mirror

jack didn’t really do anything on the show but he was a bit of fun and he’d be miles better than paul rn that’s for sure!

[esshetic]

MARS IN PISCES : Water Rollercoaster

Mars entered Pisces on the 22nd or 23rd of March, depending on where you are in the world. It is a time of change in focus and direction of energy!

Having been in the sign of Aquarius, where our focus was on the bigger picture, life felt zoomed out a little too far. Now it's time to zoom back in and get down to earth.

In deep sea, underwater, down-to-earth Pisces, our collective dreams and reality collide, and it does start to become more apparent how we are literally all the same and going through the same things at the same time.

Mars is our life force, our will, passion, sex drive, where we have courage and take initiative. Our relationship to our Mars placements may not be well-documented, explained, or easy to describe because we are in it most of the time and not observing it. Our Mars energy is second nature and instinctual, with not much time to think or feel.

Oh, the feels in Pisces! Mars will feel rather than act. Mars is commonly referred to as bringing action over an area of our life where it is placed in your natal chart, and in a transit, it will be used as a conductor of a specific energy and how we wish to direct that energy in a particular direction.

We are always living with our Mars in the moment, whether passive, assertive, or aggressive; we are in it all the time. How deep can you go? How deep can you dive into it?

Every action is Mars, including rest, boredom, or sleep, which is what we may enjoy doing more intentionally and finding joy in the minimal and mundane moments of life.

Mars in Pisces is asking us to take life moment to moment, breath from breath. Reality changes very fast, and let's move through it

Let's journey through the signs read for your Sun and Rising.

Aries, Mars will be asking you to move in flow in your 12 house however quickly the tide changes your only requirement is to move in it, dance in the rain and feel every moment without a filter of your mind.

Taurus Mars will be asking you in your 11th house to let it go, the plan the way you think the work is going to go, social intelligence, empathy and a winning smile is all the tools you need to get through your grueling schedule. Exchanging smiles will energise your light more than rest will.

Gemini Mars will be swimming around in circles in your 10th house, you are spinning your wheels and extending your energy just for the fun of it, you know you have nothing to prove right now its all fun, you have got your mojo back.

Cancer Mars is opening a heavy door into new progress with how you relate to others in your life. Those who sin differently to you are still worthy of your love Cancer, in your 9th house you are laying on the beach watching the waves lap on the shore. You have finally let it go.

Leo Mars will be dancing in your 8th house, and showing you the dance moves that you thought you could never learn, courage to learn, try fail and try again, this is a you moment, time with yourself well spent. You feel worried or anxious because you feel challenged and comfort zone threatened. This period you will learn to have trust in yourself.

Virgo Mars will be pulling you through your 7th house, there may be a lot of distractions trying to pull your directing away into a different path but Mars will give your mind a laser focus to mute out all the distractions and see yourself through to the finish line.

Libra Mars will be slow dancing in your 6th house, you may feel like being more active and doing something different like taking a Salsa dance class or pole dancing class, you may want to tap into your sensuality.

Scorpio Mars will be punching your 5th house, there is a lot of aggressive energy here with this transit in your 5th house, you will be expressing your anger more freely, the lesson is to see how you can channel the anger into something productive for you.

Sagittarius Mars will be swaying through your 4th house of your maternal energy you are someones guardian or you have a few people who are are responsible for their survival and ability to thrive, weather a mother or not you take the role of nurturer seriously and feel extremely proud about this.

Capricorn Mars will be hitting up your 3rd house I see an influx of communication and being front/ people facing, through networking or public speaking, this time you are being helped to have the courage to speak from your heart and not from your practical mind.

Aquarius Mars will be high five - ing your 2nd house there is not much information I am downloading about this transit for you, take the easy way out, chill, play video games, utilise this energy to play and not work you will thank yourself for it further down the line.

Pisces Mars will be closing out your 1st house, its an ending that this energy is helping you push that door shut, allow the feelings of grief to show up and even show out but the ending is final and fated don't want the old thing back. Focus on what God is doing in your life currently and not what has gone.

[cutebutalsostabby]

iirc you said in another post that the time between ALTTP and OOT was either 80 or 400 years. i haven’t played ALTTP yet but love timelines - are those numbers in the game somewhere?

I think I came up with those specific figures myself, BUT I do have some in-game and official text basis for them! The reason for the 80 year vs 400 years (or even longer) options is that there is actually some pretty big inconsistency between a) various parts of the game itself, b) the official game booklet, and c) Nintendo's big ole retcon of the Imprisoning War. Or possibly retCONS if we count TotK.

(Idk if you wanted an info dump, but you're getting one lol. THANKS FOR THE ASK!! 💜)

SO. The intro cutscene.

We start by hearing of legends from long ago, about a Golden Power that resides in a hidden land. Many people tried to find it; none ever returned. One day, evil power began to flow forth (we later learn this was due to Ganondorf finding the Triforce), so the King told the sages (originally translated as "Wise Men") to seal the Golden Land away for good. The narrator then describes those events as occurring so long ago that they became legend. Sounds like a while, right?

But then within about an hour or two of gameplay, you meet Sahrasrahla. Sahasrala? Saharasala? YOU MEET MR SALSA. And he ends up telling you a story about the knights that fought to protect the sages and who were almost all killed at the time, leaving YOU, the protagonist, as the last known member of that bloodline. According to Mr Salsa, those events took place only three or four generations ago.

That's not long at all! I mean, the exact numbers may vary depending on whether it's 3-4 generations from Salsa-san's point of view or Link's, as well as whether we give that person a human lifespan or an elf one (ALTTP has some Western fantasy elements, but the later games suggest that Hylians are basically just humans with pointy ears), but that would be where my ~80 years figure came from.

One of the later bits of dialogue then mentions Ganondorf rediscovering the Golden Land after the knowledge of it was lost - which may explain the discrepancy between the intro cutscene and Sahasralah(?)'s own dialogue. (I'm taking screenshots from Youtube FYI - see cutscene compilation here.)

All good so far?

WELP. THEN WE HAVE THE GAME BOOKLET.

By "game booklet" I mean the little brochure thing that used to come with physical games up until someone decided they weren't necessary. Boo and bah humbug. But I digress.

The original booklet for ALTTP, which you can find online, says that the Imprisoning War took place centuries ago. It also adds a bunch of other new lore details, including Ganondorf's last name, Dragmire - which never actually appears in-game. Both of those things are however missing from the truncated lore dump you get in the Gameboy Advance release's booklet:

And then there's Nintendo's Fallen Hero retcon. Lol.

See, the original "Imprisoning War" from ALTTP went something like this:

Ganondorf found an entrance to the Sacred Realm (formerly "Golden Land") and went in. Much like the others before him, he was then stuck there forever. UNLIKE the others before him however, he then randomly stumbled across the Triforce, which offered him the power to make a wish.

He made some unspecified wish along the lines of "I want to take over the world". As a result, the Sacred Realm became the Dark World and started to leak evil magic and demons into the Light World (aka "Overworld").

The knights fought against the demons, allowing the sages to seal the entrances ro the Sacred Realm. Note it's unclear if they even knew about Ganondorf's existence at this point.

Sometime later, Ganondorf manages to partially break free, and sends his alter ego Agahnim out to break the seal on the Sacred Realm and merge the two worlds into one.

And then we have Nintendo's retcon, which introduces the whole idea of the Fallen Hero - as a means of clumsily tying ALTTP to Ocarina of Time. So instead of the above:

Ganondorf publicly swears allegiance to the King of Hyrule, only to later backstab him and take over the castle. He then follows Link into the Temple of Time and grabs hold of the Triforce while the latter goes to take a nice long nap. He only manages to claim part of the Triforce (Power), so his wish remains incomplete. The other parts go to Link (Courage) and Zelda (Wisdom).

Seven years later, Link challenges Ganondorf to an epic showdown and loses. Ganondorf claims the remaining parts of the Triforce and uses them to transform into the Demon King. The seven sages, Zelda included, then seal both Ganon and the Triforce away in the Sacred Realm.

The names of the seven sages (per OoT) eventually become the names of the towns in Zelda II. Any remaining discrepancies are handwaved away as unreliable narrators.

Interestingly, TotK's Imprisoning War is much closer to ALTTP's version than Hyrule Historia's - which makes me wonder if that whole retcon is doomed to be retconned once again. Of course, the Triforce isn't present at all within TotK, but it's also a pretty compelling reason for why seven sages with secret stones couldn't win against the one guy with a secret stone. So there’s that.

But yeah, going back to that initial question: no, there's no specific figure provided for the time between the Imprisoning War and events of ALttP. Just depends on which piece of conflicting lore you feel like using lol.

[ready-to-obeyme]

[OM!] Relationship Alphabet (Lucifer/Reader)

Relationship Alphabet

I feel like I went a little overboard with this (it’s 7 pages) and all the hc’s, but let’s just say this is my official love letter to Luci and leave it at that.

Lucifer

A- Activity (What is their favorite activity to do with you.)

Slow dancing with you-- in the dark, in front of the fireplace, during the rain; just a quiet moment together.

I already HC’d that he knows all types of dances, so he’ll sweep you up on your feet with waltzes and ballroom dances and make you swoon into his arms with tangos and salsas. But sometimes the best part of dancing is holding you close to his chest and just being with you. I believe with all my heart that Lucifer is a man who’s softly in love, and being able to share his favorite past time with you is one of his best ways to show you he loves you.

B- Beginnings (How do they act in the beginning of a relationship)

Considering the fact that you’re a human surrounded by demons, Lucifer would act very protective of you in the beginning of your relationship-- even more so because the last thing he would ever want is for you to get hurt. He takes full responsibility for your physical well-being, though that does get overbearing until you tell him to lay it off and assure him that you’ll take precautions. He’s gone through many hardships to protect the people he loves, and you are no different. 

He’d be more hesitant with public displays of affection, though that’s not to say he’s not affectionate towards you at all. Instead, his love is shown through lingering touches and lingering gazes-- and he makes up for any lost touches by showering you with love in private quarters. He just needs to get used to being in a relationship-- and being in love: shifting his priorities to other things besides his responsibilities for others and onto growing and finally doing something that was inherently just for himself.

C- Communication (Are they good communicators? How do they normally talk about their problems or solve issues)

Ummm HAHAHA

Communication has always been hard for Lucifer. Perhaps not as much when he was still an archangel, but it definitely started when he started going against his Father’s wishes, if anywhere. (I mean, holding in his resentment and anger is what created Satan, so…) His responsibility as the eldest brother, the one who led his brothers to their literal downfall, and his vow to serve Diavolo all contributed to Lucifer’s incapability to voice his concerns to his brothers. When you came down to Devildom, you quite literally forced him to communicate, realizing that he had his family-- and you-- who were there for him no matter what. It’s a work in progress, but Lucifer finds himself being able to confide in you for things he normally would have kept to himself, including your input in decisions, especially if those decisions involve you.

D- Drunk (What are they like when they’re drunk)

Much more relaxed than he would be sober-- which makes sense since alcohol does take away your inhibitions. As a result, he relaxes and is actually quite talkative, his words less controlled, more free and flowing. The type to whisper more “I love you’s” and other words of affection toward you when drunk, which is something he trusts you to keep a secret between you and him. Only you get to see this softer side of him!

E- Emergency (How are they in emergency situations? You get hurt, they get hurt, someone is dying etc..)

Lucifer tries to make sure that you’re okay and that everything is resolved. Calm on the outside but his mind is racing-- especially when someone he cares for is hurt. Acts very composed most of the time.

If you somehow get hurt, he's downright ruthless. How dare they lay a finger on you? They'll regret their mistake for the rest of their life if he can help it. 

He's cold and calculative if he needs to be, almost extremely so in emergency situations that are dire, but that may just be a defense mechanism because he feels so strongly about protecting those he loves and prides himself in being reliable and efficient. Reacts quickly and makes decisions without hesitation, sometimes even disregarding his own feelings in the moment.

F- Free Spot (I’ll give you any headcanon I come up with)

Giving up control is the ultimate sign that Lucifer loves you and that he trusts you. (cough sub!Lucifer)

Lovely tenor voice that should be put to use more often!! (in more ways than one 😌)

The type of person who pretends to not be ticklish, but is actually pretty ticklish. He just acts nonchalant long enough for other people to drop it (but you know better)

On the sleepy mornings you call him your morningstar, his heart does a flip and he just looks at you lovingly

G- Gifts (What kind of gifts do they give? What kind of gifts do they get?)

Lucifer gets you gifts whenever he sees something that he think you’d like or gifts that-- when you go out shopping together-- catches your eyes. It always ends up little trinkets-- you wouldn’t know how to react otherwise if he consistently bought you bigger, more expensive gifts otherwise. He’s more subtle with his gifts, preferring to learn what you like and provide you with things. Definitely has Acts of Services and Quality Time as his top love languages. 

Appreciates any gift of yours because it shows you were thinking of him in parts of your daily life. Makes him very soft tbh, knowing that he’s in your thoughts.

H- Hugs (How do they show affection/cuddle)

More of a private person for affection, but loves to cuddle when he has the chance-- or rather, when you manage to convince him to take a break. Adores being big spoon, slightly unused to being small spoon and stubbornly refuses to admit that he absolutely melts under your ministrations. The man’s not used to being adored-- idolized and respected, yes-- but the way you love him makes him feel like things will be okay.

I- Irritation (What is something that irritates them? How do they show their irritation?)

Lucifer absolutely abhors seeing unfinished work on his desk, which is why he spends countless nights trying to complete it all and also why he's so annoyed at his brothers for being loud and disruptive. He's trying to work here! (If he was a gamer, he'd definitely be a completionist. The achievement compels him.) And like in-game, has no hesitation to tell his brothers to be quiet or get tied upside down, and the threat usually works because he always follows through. 

If you make him irritated for some reason, I don't think Lucifer would hesitate to ask you to stop. He doesn't really want to be mad at you, and he trusts you to understand his plight as much as you know he'd do his best to be considerate of your feelings.

J- Jackpot (How would they spend their winnings if they won the lottery?)

FINALLY paying off Mammon’s debts… at a price that Mammon will pay for the rest of his life. (rip Mammon) 

Would also like to take you on a trip somewhere together. Depending on whether you want to go to a particular place or not, you can decide the destination. If you have no preference, he’d honestly just pick a quiet place to be, perhaps near the sea, so the both of you can relax in each others’ presence. He's the type to be okay staying in bed with you the entire week, but if you want to explore or sightsee, he'll research for places with you.

K- Kryptonite (What is their ultimate weakness?)

Online shopping--

Family has always been his kryptonite. He’s willing to give up his pride-- as an Archangel and as the right hand man of Diavolo-- for his brothers: both when he declared war on the Celestial Realm for Lilith and when he lied to Diavolo about Belphie’s dissent. Now that he considers you family, there is very little he would do to make you happy.

L- Laughter (What makes them laugh?)

I actually don't think it's hard to make him laugh. A lot of your antics with Levi and Mammon are actually really amusing-- until they affect his work. But I think the man finds amusement in a lot of his daily life, considering how spontaneous Diavolo and Barbatos are. Lucifer is always naturally soft for his brothers, so just any good times with them (without trouble) is bound to make him throw his head and laugh. He always has a good time teasing his brothers when he can and seeing you interact with them.

Also, the audacity of some lower class demons that try to challenge him or hurt you makes him laugh too. Just not in a joyous way. Definitely has the fake, sadistic laughter before he maims someone.

M- Morning ( How do they wake up in the morning? Are they a morning person or a morning grouch?)

“Good morning. *yawns* Sorry, I’m not much of a morning demon.” 

A grouch. A complete and total sleepy head. Constantly pulls all-nighters and conks out when he gets to bed and struggles really badly to get himself out of it. Lucifer has to really push himself to get out of the covers some days. And when you're in bed with him, even WORSE. Cuddles you till the last possible minute-- but he would never actually let the two of you be late for anything. It's kinda cute how not of a morning person he is. 

Make a cup of coffee for him in the morning and he'll groggily wake up and try to convince you to come back to bed with him.

N- Needy (When do they feel particularly needy? How do they show it?)

"I would like to be able to talk to you more. Is that selfish of me?"

Lucifer doesn't always request for your affection or time, but when he does it blows you out of the water every time. When he feels needy varies. Sometimes it just hits him in the middle of the day when he's doing work or when he feels like he hasn't had a lot of time to be with you lately. He doesn't make it a habit of needing you, but he becomes more explicit when he does want you, though he's not really specific on how he wants you most of the time. 

He probably calls you out of the blue sometimes just to ask you how your day was so he can hear your voice. If you're in the room with him while he's working, he might tell you to come here and you would just let him quietly hug your torso-- but please do sweep your hand through his hand during this time.

For sexual needs, on the other hand, he's pretty straightforward because at the end of the day, he's still a smooth talker when he knows what he wants. Especially if you're shy about it, he'll be even more inclined to be honest about his desire, teasing you and luring you in. 

O- Oasis (Where is their happy place? Where would they go if they didn’t have anything holding them back?)

The human realm. 

I think loving you is the most selfish thing he could do because it is one of the only things he has done just for himself. If Lucifer were to truly decide something for himself without having to think about the wellbeing of others, he would choose to live in the human realm with you.

P- Pain (How do they handle pain? How do they handle when you are in pain?)

You know those typical anime protagonists that get hurt, pretend to be okay until everyone is safe, and people only find out they're hurt when they collapse? 

Yeah, that's Lucifer. Dramatic and prideful af 

He used to handle pain on his own until he had you to confide in and convince him to talk to others for help.

When you're in pain, depending on the severity, would find the solution to your pain or try ways to alleviate it. If you had a physical injury, would lowkey fuss over you and make sure you're cared for and have everything you need. If it's something serious, Lucifer does his best to show that everything is alright, though you know he's worried beyond comfort.

Q- Quote (What’s a quote that fits them and your relationship)

“I will love you until the stars go out and the tides no longer turn.”

“Let us flip the coin and see. Head, I am yours. Tail, you are mine. So, we won’t lose.”

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride.” - Pablo Neruda

R- Reunion (How do they celebrate seeing you after a long time of being apart)

With horny juice

jk love the new chapters <333

Lucifer tries not to monopolize your time at first, because he knows how much his brothers missed you as well. But, god, he'd pine over you the entire day if he could, shooting you glances and turning back, smiling and just overall generally happy that he can see you face to face. 

He's missed you so much and he's just glad you're back with them, and he's confident in your relationship with him to know that he'll have his time eventually. It's that or he'll sweep you away from the brothers at night if they keep on hogging your attention. 

S- Stress (What stresses them out? How do deal with stress and how do they relieve it?)

Watching his brothers get into trouble is the best way to get his blood pressure rising. He usually deals with it by yelling at them even as he deals with it. (The man needs a break.)

Most of the time, Lucifer is pretty composed. He lives under a state of stress all the time considering the workload he always has, so it's not that big of a deal for him.

T- Terror (What are they afraid of?)

Lucifer's worst fear is to have you become afraid of him. The last thing he would ever want is to do is something that scares you, so he controls himself as best as he can (considering he hasn't done the best at that before). He becomes more aware of his anger and aggression when in front of you, and is keen on absolutely never showing aggression towards you again. There shouldn't be anything the two of you can't talk through anymore and he wants to keep it that way.

I don't think he can imagine anything worse than to reach out to you only to have you flinch back and cower because you're afraid he'll do something to you. It honestly would break his heart.

U- Unique (What is a quirk that is unique to them?)

As an archangel-- a seraph, Lucifer had three sets of wings, which was reduced to two, perhaps due to Satan's birth or perhaps due to his falling. Regardless, his demon form, reminiscent of his Celestial Realm days, on better days, reminds him that he is powerful-- though it pains him still. On the worst days, he hates who he has become. Not to say he regrets falling, giving up his life in the Celestial Realm for his family or fighting for what he believes in, but his demon form reminds him of what he has lost and how he has failed. 

You adore his demon form, despite it all, or perhaps you love his form regardless because it represents his love for family, his loyalty, his dedication to something-- or someone. He will never admit it, but having you run your hands through his wings or brush your hand against his horns lovingly is something that makes him fall apart in your arms, on his most vulnerable days. He may have become a demon, but your hands make him feel like that doesn't matter as much. Makes him feel personally invested to see that the three realms are united, if it means he can be with you.

In short, Lucifer is unused to body worship, especially in his demon form but you help him remember to love himself.

V- Violence (Do they fight a lot? Are they a good fighter? What is their fighting style?)

Your man's not eldest brother and Avatar of Pride for nothin', baby.

Probably hasn't fought as much since the end of the Celestial War, but he still knows how to very well. His style of fighting is lethal and quick, much like how he thinks. Fighting is just the means to an end, whether it's for something he believes in or to dish out punishment. Though, it depends on his opponent-- Lucifer can definitely toy with someone he thinks is beneath him, probably a lower class demon who thinks he's hot shit. He is, afterall, still sadistic.

W- Wow (What do you do that really surprises them? What do you do that they really like?)

Lucifer is surprised at the easy affection you provide him. It just seems to come naturally for you to lace your fingers with his on the way back to the House of Lamentation or wrap your arms around him and perch your head on his shoulders as he works. He gets an odd feeling in his chest every time you trace lines onto his back when your in bed together or when you play with his fingers like they're something to be admired. He basks in the way you love him-- like it's simple and easy. He craves your touch, even if he doesn't realize it himself.

What surprises him, and also lowkey scares him, is how surprisingly confrontational you can be when it matters. How brave you are, standing up for or against someone else, even if that someone else was him. It's something that he admires in you, though it worries him nonetheless-- so he'll be there to back you up if you ever need it in the future. His little firecracker. 

X- (Explicit headcanon. For all you degenerates) 

(///∇///) nsfw

Prefers masturbating in the shower, hand against the wall as the water cascades down his body. Cleaner that way, and if he moans, there's less chance someone will overhear him.

Loves to have and see you fall apart under his touch: Edging, overstimulation, hearing you beg and call his name (his sadistic side really showing though rn), watching you as you orgasm. Lucifer can be rough for sure but what he really wants you to do is tell him what you want so he can do it even better. Kind of smug of his skills tbh LOVES seeing you blush. 

On the other hand, a gentle and sensual lover who gives. Also enjoys receiving, burying his hand into your hair as you give him a blowjob. And maybe if you like it, he’ll pull on your hair too.

Y- Yucky (Is there something that grosses them out so badly that they can’t deal with it?)

I don't know why but I feel like Lucifer absolutely hates moldy food in the fridge. shdjskdksksk It would never happen with Beel around, but something about the texture, look, color unsettles him. There's no mess he can't clean or deal with, but he does make a face at it. Honestly, his brothers make such a mess everyday and he's seen so much bloodshed that is there really anything he's fazed by?

Z- ZZZ’s (What are their sleeping habits? Both with and without you)

Sleep is for the weak.

Can go days without sleeping the mad lad, and he often has to with his workload. When Lucifer does sleep, he sleeps like the dead. Not to say he doesn't move when he sleeps, because he does shift and use the entirety of his bed, but because very little can wake him up if he's truly tired. Belphie probably gets it from him tbh  

When you're in his life, his sleep schedule becomes more of a regular thing, mainly because it's hard for him to resist you when you ask him to come to bed to you. Falls asleep cuddling you and wakes up with you in his arms. If you manage to roll away in your sleep, he eventually finds a way to snake his arms around your waist. 

If you ever mention this to him, he might actually get embarrassed because he's not exactly in control of what he does when he's asleep-- and the fact he seeks you out when unconscious is very telling. Don't tease him too much or he'll never stop tickling you.

[growup-gloup]

Quarantine Survival Guide

With more and more places shutting down work or school, and people going on self-imposed quarantines to be safe and keep those around them safe, it’s high time that we figure out a game plan about what to do about the virus. 

Disclaimer

I am not a doctor, nor am I pretending to be such. This is generalized information. Please do your own research, or contact your general physician if you have health related questions or concerns. 

What is Coronavirus?

COVID-19 is a strain of the coronavirus, which has been around for longer than you think, though we generally have antiviruses, cures, or immunities to the majority of the strains. It originates from animals and is now transferable from human to human. The reason why COVID-19 is different from any other virus is because it’s so new, there are no vaccines for it, and our bodies haven’t naturally developed antibodies for the virus either, which means that nearly everyone who comes into contact with it will get it, though the extent of symptoms and how much it affects you depends on factors such as your overall health and immune system.

The symptoms include a cough and struggling to breathe, along with a fever and related aches. If you are more prone to illnesses because of your age or immune system, then you can possibly get pneumonia or serious illnesses.

You’re at risk if you’re a child or senior, or if you have an autoimmune disorder of some sort. If you are already more susceptible to pneumonia, then this is a dangerous virus for you, but otherwise, all you will feel is a few days of flu-like symptoms before you’re better. Even if you show very few symptoms, the virus can stay in your system for over two weeks, which is why the quarantine is necessary, so that the virus has time to die off.

You can prevent catching it, or passing it onto those around you by frequently washing your hands, avoiding touching your face, and if you’re feeling under the weather, then keeping physical distance from those around you. 

You can find daily updates at WHO, and resources at Harvard Health Publishing. 

How do I work/study from home?

One thing that’s great about going to school or work away from home is that it encourages you to build a routine and discipline, which is something that falls apart if you spend too much time at home. You can replicate that by pretending that you are still going out by following these steps:

Follow the same time schedule. If you wake up at 7, keep waking up at 7. The time you would use for transportation, use it for some form of exercise. Get ready at the same time. Eat breakfast and lunch at the same time. If you normally have this particular class at this particular hour on this particular day, that is the subject you’ll continue to be working on during that time. 

Get ready for work. When people think of homeschooling or working from home, one of the ideas that seems appealing is not having to get dressed up. Wouldn’t it be great if we could do all our work in our pajamas? The problem with that is that it decreases your productivity, since your mind associates certain clothes and behaviors with shutting down for the day, like wearing pajamas or sitting on the couch. But if you get dressed as if you’re about to leave for school or work, then your mind is accepting that you are done resting for the day and it’s grind time. 

Have a space just for work. Adding to the previous point, if you have a specific space where you just do your school or office work while you’re at home, which shouldn’t be in your bedroom, then your mind will assume that place as your workplace. But if you work on the couch or bed, which are places you normally relax, then you’re more prone to getting tired or distracted. 

Minimize distractions. You’ve gotten ready for the day. You even got your work space ready and your cute highlighters ready to go. But now you’re hungry. Or thirsty. Or you need to check your phone. Bring some healthy snacks to the table, which should cause minimal mess or effort to eat. Pre-cut fruits with a fork is a great option. So are oven-baked tortilla chips with salsa dip, as long as you keep that a bit away from your work. You can also try apps like Forest, or Tide, to help you stay off your phone for a certain set of time. If you must listen to music, then stick to classical music. I’m partial to Chopin and Mozart, but it’s up to you, as long as it’s classical.

Try the Pomodoro technique. Working for hours at a time is very unproductive, contrary to what one might think, partially because your attention span lasts less than half an hour before you need a break. You can try to break your work into chunks by setting up a timer for 25 minutes, taking a break for 5 minutes, and then working for 25 minutes again. You can use the apps mentioned in the last point. Tide even has a chrome pomodoro extension with white noise that you could use.

Use online resources. Just because you can’t ask your teacher a question in person doesn’t mean you’re helpless. Tons of resources, such as Khan Academy, or Crash Course, can help you understand the concepts more. They may even help you get ahead in courses that you have a good understanding of already. 

What to do with all this extra time?

While imposing a quarantine slows the spread of the virus, we’re faced with an entirely different situation. We’re so used to rushing to work/school, then rushing back, and constantly busy and interacting, then when we don’t know what to do now that we are alone. When you’re not working or studying, you can do the following:

Catch up on chores and errands that have been piling up around the house. Do that thing you kept postponing because of your job or school.

Pick up a new skill. It can be anything you’ve wanted to be able to do, but didn’t get a chance, from sewing, or playing an instrument, to speaking a new language. You could even learn some basic plumbing and tools skills and install a bidet so you don’t have to deal with the toilet paper crisis again.

Read a new book. If you don’t have any books at home, you can check out options such as the Open Library, or even Wattpad.

Start a new show that has a lot of seasons, or long episodes, such as Supernatural, Gossip Girl, or even Critical Role.  

Practice your cooking skills with all the items you hoarded. 

Rearrange the furniture in your house/room to make it feel like a new space.

Keep moving. Find a workout routine that works from home, or do something like yoga or dancing. If you’re not going out, you’re not being as active, which is not good. 

Keep in touch with friends. Text and call them frequently. You could even have a remote Netflix session with your friends, or significant other, using the Netflix Party extension. 

Learn to play poker, unless you have an addictive personality. Then you can learn cool shuffling tricks to impress friends at all the parties you’ll go to once the quarantine lockdown is lifted. 

Draw and write. You don’t have to be an author or researcher or an artist. Just draw things you see around you. Write about how you’re feeling. It can help with the isolation.

What can I do as a parent of kids staying home from school?

If your job hasn’t imposed a quarantine yet, try to see if it is possible for you to work from home. 

If you can’t be home, see if you have one parent, if there’s more than one, or extended family or friends, who do not have babies or elderly, or members with compromised immune systems, and see if it’s possible to do a lockdown together if none of you have caught it yet. 

Devise a family plan so that everyone is on the same page. Use the above-mentioned tips and adapt them to fit your family’s needs. You can also find other things you can do that haven’t been mentioned here. 

If you are working at home, or are a stay-at-home parent, have designated work hours that reflect the schedule you regularly have. You can say that for these two hours, everyone does their work. The kids do their school work. The adults do their work. And then you can have a break to talk, play, or eat. 

You can look into homeschooling blogs and see how homeschooling parents set up their schedules, and if they have tips or online resources that may help. They have been doing this for longer and know ways to manage routines of multiple members of the family who stay at home, or even work while their children are homeschooled. 

💋

[spartanjdancestudio1]

How to Set Up a Dance Studio - Things to Consider Before Setting Up Your Studio

A dance studio is often a room where amateur dancers practice or learn. The word is usually used to describe a room which has been constructed or equipped with the purpose of practicing dance. This can be in any form such as a small room, large room or an open space.

In some cases dance studios are also known as dance schools. Dance schools are run by teachers and are similar to schools in many ways except for the fact that they focus on certain styles of dancing. Many schools offer classes specifically for novices who wish to learn the basic steps of ballroom dances like the waltz, trot step, salsa, Latin flamenco and others. Many of these schools may have recitals or competitions on a regular basis.

It is not uncommon for some studio owners to run workshops or teach dance classes for extra income. Dance studios are also a place where experienced dancers come to refresh their skills or to get motivated about something new. Many of these dancers end up opening their own Sparta NJ Dance Studio. Others may start a home business in this field.

To start a dance studio, you may need to acquire a few things. The first thing would be the space. The location will depend on the kind of dance you intend to perform. If it is a recital or performance you will require a large space as it would be difficult to stage the show considering that there would be many audience members. In performing arts, the venue can be almost anywhere but if your target is to provide dance for beginners, a simple studio with a capacity of around 200 would be sufficient.

Once you have acquired a space, you need to set about creating your dance studio class descriptions. For recitals or performances, your class descriptions should be competitive and fun. For those who are just teaching beginners, the class descriptions should be simple, easy to follow, and specific instructions for each exercise group. For example, if you are teaching a series of steps for the French tongue, you should describe it as "step right, step left, foot to floor, back to the floor, head to the ceiling". These class descriptions will make it easier for learners and experienced teachers alike.

It is important to create a sound financial plan. This will include how much you expect your students to pay as teachers or as fees for classes. Estimations should include the amount of space needed and the cost of various materials including mats, chairs, lighting, etc. Remember to take into account your own enthusiasm and skill so that you do not become too stressed out over finances. Also, ask other dancers in your area which dance studios they use so you can find out if they are good enough to recommend.

If you have no prior dance studio experience, it would be advisable to look for teachers in your area who have experience teaching newcomers. You may also consider visiting the local schools, even if it's an expensive affair. Teachers often have a rapport with most local schools and will not mind helping new students. On the other hand, dancers often have to start at the bottom before moving on to some level of expertise.

As a prospective dancer, you need to know how to properly take care of yourself in between dance classes. It is essential to have a first-aid kit handy because you will likely need it throughout your dancing career. Some basic first-aid products can be bought from any drug store but if you have money, you can always hire a professional first-aid kit that includes bandages, scissors, painkillers, ointments, and more. For the best practice, it would be best if you join a health club so you can see first-hand how to use various first-aid tools and methods. This will ensure that you can avoid having common problems such as blisters, cuts, and bruises while working out at your studio.

[calorieworkouts]

21 Ways to Burn 500 Calories a Day

We all know in order to shed 1 extra pound we need to melt off 3500 calories, to make sure that indicates burning 500 calories each day. So what are the very best ways to burn those 500 calories? Well it depends on how much time you have and exactly how much effort you intend to apply.

The ideal choice of workout is mosting likely to be one that you wish to do, or at the very least that you will certainly appreciate. There is no factor in picking to run for thirty minutes if you don't really like running as well as will certainly postpone going or make justifications for not going.

If the thought of doing one activity for 60 mins is also much to handle then why not divide it up. Do one task for half that amount of time as well as melt 250 calories and after that modification task, or later in the day do a different task till you have worked of another 250 calories. In this way you will certainly have some selection. I think in some cases it is simply easier to obtain it all done in one go yet everyone is different so simply locate what jobs best for you.

The calories you burn in the activities below are all approximate and also based on a lady weighing 135 lbs. The quantity of calories you burn will certainly depend on your weight and how much initiative you are taking into it. If you are much heavier after that you will burn a lot more calories, if you are laid back and also taking the task very easy you will certainly shed much less calories than if you press yourself harder and also operate at a higher strength. Bear in mind that every little thing you do burns calories, wiping the floor, dusting, showering, standing makes use of more calories than taking a seat and so on. Although these tasks alone do not melt several calories it all assists so following time you need to do housework or chores assume of them as methods to burn calories.

So right here you go select the ones you like as well as start shedding off those calories.

Running 30 minutes at 8mph

The ideal form of exercise to melt calories is running. You do not require any equipment and it will yield results quick. I would certainly suggest including stamina training into your workout. Running by itself might aid you melt the calories and shed body fat but, you can likewise begin to shed lean muscular tissue mass, which is not what you desire. Muscle additionally melts calories, it is what offers you shape and also tone to your body. Slimming down does not help you solid your muscles, develop a perky bum or offer you shapely legs, that's done with making use of weight (body weight, weights or weight machines). By including strength training you will keep your muscle mass, help transform your body form as well as boost your metabolic process - which implies burning more calories whilst you rest.

Jogging 60 minutes at 5mph

similar to running although at a gentler rate so you need to choose longer to shed the same amount of calories.

High Strength Interval Training

You can add this to most tasks, it means including intervals where you operate at high strength. This form of training is confirmed to raise the amount of calories shed as well as will certainly also mean you can function out for less time than if you were just exercising at a consistent rate. For even more details read Get Results Faster with High Intensity Training.

Swimming for 60 minutes

I am not chatting regarding delicately travelling backwards and forwards the swimming pool or swimming in the sea, lake etc, you need to be concentrated as well as swim swim, ruptureds of high intensity need to be contributed to get the most out of your session.

Mowing the lawn for 2 hours

not actually an activity that you can do daily, unless you have some crazy grass that grows at an amazing price, yet if you want to add some range to your exercises you can include it in to your regular and also obtain 2 points done at when. If you are taking a look at your lawn and also thinking "no other way will it take 2 hrs to trim" after that add another activity to your day to obtain to the 500 calories, maybe likewise other gardening duties such as pruning the bushes, pulling weeds.

Hiking for 2 hours

similar to walking yet extra energy is typically used up as you must be strolling a bit faster than your typical stroll around the park plus you can include a lot a lot more varied terrain (include hills, mountains, climbing up over fencings etc). You might sign up with a club or go by on your own. Venture out see some locations of all-natural elegance, take advantage of great weather and don't neglect to take lots of water.

Rock climbing for 60 minutes

take up a brand-new sporting activity and also obtain a complete body workout at the same time. Your top body will certainly get a great work out in addition to your legs and you will be burning those calories.

Tennis for 60 minutes

If you are playing a songs match, if increases you will certainly need to play for longer. Tennis is a fantastic sporting activity that will certainly melt the calories yet additionally burn through the time. In virtually any kind of sports that include others time appears to whiz by without you understanding it.

Martial Arts

A session long lasting 50 mins will certainly suffice. Not thinking about fighting styles? Exactly How around Krav Maga or self support courses or also boxing.

Horse riding for 2 hours

This is based on general riding, if you are completing or practicing/training for program jumping or cross country etc after that you will melt more calories.

Aerobics

High effect action aerobics for 50 minutes, if you select low impact step aerobics then you will certainly need to workout for 70 minutes. Water aerobics for 2 hrs to burn 500 calories.

Volleyball for 60 minutes

This is based on coastline volleyball which burns extra calories than your health club based variation! Do not fail to remember to shield yourself from the sunlight. If you do not delight in beach ball after that why not play Ultimate Frisbee on the coastline, the less gamers the a lot more calories you will burn.

Cycling for 75 minutes

A wonderful way to reach as well as from work or the stores. Burn calories, get an excellent complete body exercise. If it's been a while because you have actually ridden a bike then prepare to be aching the next day from utilizing muscle mass you didn't recognize you had. A good seat is additionally advised if you intend on cycling on a regular basis as well as for fars away. Keep in mind to add in periods of high intensity.

Dance

Take a class or dance in your very own residence, whether you know just how to dance or not it can be a fun method to burn calories. The sort of dancing you do will identify how numerous calories you burn. 60 minutes of salsa and you will melt approx 290 calories, 60 mins of ballet or modern dance and you will certainly shed approx 310 calories.

Strength Training

OK you will not shed 500 calories in one session (even more like 300 calories) yet you can always choose a fast jog or run before or after and also strike that 500 objective and even surpass it.

Spinning Class for 45 minutes

These courses will certainly have you melting calories fast although it will depend on your input. No slacking, push hard, enhance the resistance and keep going.

Stair Climber for 50 minutes

Hop on the stair mountain climber at the fitness center or discover some staircases to run up and walk down (bear in mind to stroll down as you don't wish to shed your balance).

Surfing for 60 minutes

great fun if you have some neighborhood beaches that have great waves however otherwise then maybe attempt paddle boarding or kayaking which can be performed in the sea or on a lake.

Rowing Device for 45-50 minutes

One of the tools I see many individuals at the fitness center making use of incorrectly i.e. rounding their when they go forward or utilizing their arms to draw prior to their legs have extended. If you are not sure of the appropriate strategy ask among the fitness center instructors to show you (that's what they are there for). Alternatively if you have a rowing equipment in the house then locate an on the internet demonstration.

Jump rope for 50 minutes

Probably best done by splitting it up as leaping for 51 minutes straight may be a little extreme. So split it up right into to smaller sized pieces as well as jump during the early morning, day, night or whenever you have extra time perhaps whilst you wait for your dinner to prepare, during industrial breaks whilst enjoying your preferred programs ...

Fidget and keep moving

i. e. leg jumping (frustrating to some so pick when carefully - maybe not to be done during a conference or whilst chatting to close friends), walking while you are on the phone. Take the stairs, obtain of the bus one stop earlier, park even more away from the entrance as well as walk that added little bit. How about mosting likely to go down of that record face to face rather than placing it in the inner mail. OK this is not mosting likely to burn you those 500 calories by itself but they are easy adequate to include throughout your day to assist enter some added calories burnt.

For those of you who are experiencing snow at the minute as well as need to remove the drive after that get a snow shovel and also in 80 mins you will have burnt 500 calories ...

There are numerous methods you can melt 500 calories a day, although I have mentioned simply a few of them above, this does not suggest you have to restrict yourself to only these. Start thinking of what you such as to do and also where outdoors, inside, alone, with others etc).

It is not everything about melting calories though, yes in order to lose weight you wish to melt off even more than you eat yet you additionally require to look at what you are eating. There are those who say that getting the body you want or reducing weight is 80% diet plan and 20% workout (or other similar numbers) and also it is real, what you eat makes a huge distinction to your results. Once you begin to change your diet as well as consume much healthier you will start discovering a difference not only in your weight yet likewise in your general wellness. Currently include exercise (a mix of cardio as well as stamina training) and also you will see results faster.

One last point, as you start to reduce weight you will certainly require to work tougher to melt the very same amount of calories.

Is your objective to slim down? If you are judging your development by what the scales say this may not be the most effective sign of your development, consider altering your shape by shedding body fat not weight.

[the-colony-roleplay]

↬ Col22 Annual Appreciation Awards: The Reception ↫

The decorations in the Colony’s Catch 22 are purposely less lush than the exuberance that was found in the auditorium for the ceremonies. Oh, there’s still a ton of holiday themed paraphernalia: wreaths and garlands, colourful twinkly lights and, yup, there’s that mistletoe again...  but there are no ostentatious draperies, and only one Christmas tree in the corner. Much more digestible.

The evening is designed to be a real celebration. Alright, let’s say it: a party. But after a long year of hard work and difficult change, this is something that even Alex sees as good for morale. The awards are the first part of it—acknowledgement for their commitment, for their rigorous training and for the progress they’ve made. And this... well, this is the second part. The part where people might laugh and dance and forget about the reality of things, if even for a little while. 

Because the truth is, this is the new reality. This isn’t the apocalypse anymore—it’s post-apocalypse. As much fear and horror and strain and loss still fill their world on a day to day basis, and as much as the fight is a long ways from over—this, here and now, is the new world, and they have to live in it. Because as soon as they forget the simpler, human joys of life, the easier it will be to lose motivation entirely. “Those who fight together, thrive together”: the Colony 22 Games motto since the day of its rise. But there has to be something worth fighting for. Something to inspire a reason to survive. 

Alex, despite his reclusive nature, despite his tendency to put work first and friendship second, knows that the only thing keeping these citizens alive now, with all the fear and oppression and prejudice clouding over their heads, is love. Pure and simple. God knows he’ll never say it out loud, but he knows it to be true, nonetheless. The friendships and loyalties built within these walls over the past five years have become a reason for people to push forward. A foundation on which to nurture their passion, ambition and drive. 

And so, despite the fact that Alex is still intending to make himself scarce within the hour, once the general public are a couple drinks and some pour soul’s taking the first stab at the Karaoke machine—he is pleased by what he finds when he first walks in. Pleased to see colony company slowly filing in—some of them having dressed down for the reception, others still sporting their refurbished prom dresses and ties. 

Even some of the NWRF shuffle in awkwardly looking in desperate need of a drink. Which, as far as Alex is concerned, is perfectly fair. Perhaps even they are doomed to have a good time tonight, as the night presses on and their glasses are refilled. And perhaps, Alex will even stay a little longer than planned. Perhaps. 

CHECK OUT FULL EVENT DETAILS AND SUMMARY UNDER THE READ MORE!

Good Evening and Happy New Year, everyone! Welcome to the Second Portion of the Colony’s 6th, non-games Event!

THIS POST OFFICIALLY TRIGGERS PART TWO OF THE AWARDS EVENT: THE RECEPTION AT CATCH22!

                       ↬ EVENT DETAILS & SUMMARY ↫

General Geography

Much like so many other physical spaces in the Colony, we’ve always left it specific enough to work with, but vague enough to leave you free to work your imaginations. However, since so many of us will be threading here all at once, we figured it might be a good idea to give you a sense of the space. 

So, the front of the Catch has a small covered patio attached—no tables or anything, just a wooden awning with pillars, two steps up from the ground—some people will smoke out here. 

When you walk in through the front double doors, the bar is forward and to the left side of the room. Directly centre of the room is most of the tables and chairs for the seating area. These are old wooden chairs and tables, kind of rustic. The WCs are past the bar, on the left, down a little alcove. In the back of the room, beyond the tables, there is a small stage that used to be used for bands/performances etc. It is rarely used as such anymore, and is currently more or less grouped in with the dance floor, which is just in front of the stage. Tonight, however, the stage may have a use or two... more on that later :) 

Also for the purposes of the evening, there will be a couple of long tables set up on the right side of the room (opposite side of the seating area from the bar) where all the food will be dropped off. This will be a help-yourself sort of set up, with casual finger-food people can pick at over the course of the evening. More on this below! 

Food and Drink

So, like with the Brink Reopening, there is finger food available, all of which is being prepared up in the kitchens from the main building. There are volunteers cooking and bringing food down in through the back of the Catch, but it is not catered in the same way as the “classy” Brink Reopening was. The food is casual, pub-style appies, and is not brought around on platters, but rather set up on tables with napkins and small plates (plastic ones! because there’s no Party Central stores in the apocalypse and they can’t afford paper plates, ya’ll, so put ‘em in the dirty dish bin at the end of the table, okay? Just as the heartfelt handwritten sign on the wall so politely and firmly requests!)  

Food assortment includes the following: 

Chicken and Veggie Sliders

Chicken Wings (Hot, BBQ and Salt&Pepper) 

House Cut French Fries 

Fish Tacos

Veggies & Dip

Chips and Salsa

Drinks will be served at the bar, (Xavier Crane is one of the usual bartenders for the evening, along with some other regular Catch staff. Mitch Douglas will also be seen back there some of the time, because he’s very much a hands-on kind of volunteer). All the usual drinks one might find on a regular night will be available, so not the same restrictions as at the Brink Opening, but drink tickets have again been handed out to citizens over the age of 18. These were passed out in little envelopes before leaving the ceremony (so anyone who decided to skip the ceremonies wouldn’t have gotten theirs!!) and the number of tickets is determined by security class again, which are as follows: 

Elites & Class 1: Three free tickets

Class 2: Two free tickets

Class 3: One free ticket

If citizens would like to purchase more drinks with their credits, they can obviously do so as per usual, but standard drink limits still apply, and free drinks count towards those limits. 

Music, Dancing & Entertainment

Unlike the Bonfire, no one is particularly DJing this event, but Tate Rothchild has volunteered to run the music, and she’ll be taking requests. The dance floor will be open most of the evening, but there will be Karaoke between 9pm and 10pm which Crane will be running (quite enthusiastically, we might add) at which point the bar will be run by other staff. 

After Karaoke, dancing and music will continue until close, at 0130. Last call for drinks will be at 1am. 

Maisie Pace will also be wandering around taking official photos for the evening, so citizens should keep an eye out for her if they want some taken with their friends in front of the Christmas tree! And remember: there’s mistletoe surreptitiously hung about the bar—will anyone be caught under it, I wonder? Perhaps Miss Pace will be quick enough to snap a shot of that too... she is an excellent fly on the wall, after all. 

Photos taken at the event will be made available on Echo in the following weeks. 

                   ↬ EVENT ROLEPLAYING GUIDELINES↫

The same guidelines apply as with all our events, and with ceremonies. Here is a summary/reminder!

As of now, you may NOT post any NEW threads that are not affiliated with the RECEPTION portion of the event. The new timeline of the RP is currently AFTER the ceremonies. So you have free reign of anything between the ceremonies ending and people milling about, or going back to their dorms to change, or heading down to the Catch, or anything throughout the night of the party at the Catch, until it closes. However, If your character does not attend the reception, they could be elsewhere in the colony at this time. Basically, you are free to RP your character anytime between 8pm (when the awards ended) and 2am, which would be just after the Catch closes. 

You MAY continue old threads you have going, both pre event, or from the ceremony. All we ask is that you start tagging non-event threads with #preevent so we know they are earlier in the timeline.  On going, ceremony threads do not need to be tagged this way, as they are still part of the event overall. 

All new event threads being posted must be TITLED and tagged as such, indicating that they are Event threads.  (In this case, key words like “Awards” or “Event” or “Reception” or even “After Party” is encouraged. How you go about this is up to you though! 

You MAY post photos of your character’s clothing/outfits, etc, if you wish. You are by no means obligated to do so. 

Please TAG your event starters with the regular starter tag (#col22starter), AS WELL AS #col22awards. 

The event will continue until the mods post an official closing notice. It will likely last about week, maybe more, depending on member activity. We want to give enough time for people to get a good start on threads and plotting, before wrapping it up. Obviously people will be able to continue on going threads after the event closes, but still, we’ll be keeping an eye on the dash and who’s had a chance to participate! We don’t want to have it going too long, but always endeavour to make sure everyone gets a chance to get involved!

Alright, I think that’s all I got for now folks! As always, come to us with any questions you might have! And we’d appreciate if you bring them to the main blog Ask so that we can share event related questions with everyone! 

Also, just so everyone knows, the tag the mod blog is using for this event is col22awards2—so you can track it if you want! But this is a mod only tag, so please just use col22awards for your own stuff! It’s just simpler, and that way the tag remains uncluttered for admin stuff in case anyone wants to track it! Thanks!

Very much looking forward to this portion of the event! Can’t wait to see what you guys bring to it and all the fun chaos on the dash! 

Okay, have fun ya’ll and Happy New Year!!

xxMod!Ro

[2pcontinued]

If Kuro and Luciano fell in love with the same person

First of all, in general, this would be a wild ride for their object of affection, since lord, these two are a tad possessive and competitive in general. However, they would never do anything to put the person in harms way, to hurt their feelings, hurt their loved ones, and hurt each other seriously. They’re just competitive, not major assholes. Anyway, as I was saying, it would always be who you would choose to go with. They both know that your happiness is their number one concern, so if you choose one over the other because you’re happy with them, they would completely understand and let you two be together. They both believe in the saying that goes “If you love them, let them go.”, they’re very earnest and meaningful in their emotions and actions if they really like the person. Nonetheless, in the beginning of recognizing their feelings, they would both understand that the other likes you. Both Kuro and Luciano are very observant people naturally, so they would both notice the first signs of love in each other, mostly for you. Rather, they would confront each other once they had a solid idea that they both were in love with you. Of course, throughout the conversation there would come various taunts and such, and it would probably end with them both saying, simultaneously, “may the better man win”. You would have to remind them that you are not a prize to be won, but after that, all’s fair game to them. They would offer you to go with them to go to various occasions, such as Luciano asking for you to go to a ball with him, or to go eat at his restaurant free of charge, while Kuro would ask for you to go to his art studio for him to draw you, and for you to come walk with him through his private garden, complete with sakura trees, a butterfly sanctuary, and a koi pond. In the end of all the petty competition, they would confront you after a few weeks, and ask for you to choose one. At this point, the situation could go four ways, which I will list below.

Possible endings

Ending 1: Take Luciano’s hand

If you would choose Luciano, Kuro’s usually cold brown eyes would warm and water up a bit before he would blink them away, and he would sigh and say “Very well, just know that you will always be a part in my heart. If you ever need me, you can call for me, and I will always be there. I wish you a happy relationship, and Luciano, I guess you may be the better man. Congratulations.” Kuro would feel a bit dejected for a few days, but would get over it sooner or later. He knows to never dwell in the past, it distracts from the present. However, any time that Luciano may treat you the way that he feels you shouldn’t be treated, Kuro will always remind you of his open invitation. Luciano would spoil you to his heart’s content, anything you want, he’ll get it for you, that includes him taking you for midnight drives when you can’t sleep, picking you up no matter where you are, eating at the fanciest restaurants, and going on at least one shopping spree a week. Luciano would treat you like royalty, you better believe it

Ending 2: Take Kuro’s hand

If you were to choose Kuro, Luciano would lose his face for a moment. Instead of a usual smirk, you would see a frown set upon his tan features. He would run a hand through his hair and say “It seems as though you have chosen, my treasure. When you realize that you made the wrong choice, you can always run back into my arms. Other than that, at least you’re happy, I suppose. And Kuro, treat them right, okay? If I see anything that will put them in harms way, I have every right to steal them away. Arrivederci, mio amore.” Luciano would feel pissed for the next few hours since he loves winning in general, but he’ll get over it within a matter of hours and go back to his smooth, flirtatious self. On the other hand, you may find him being very open with you still, since he still loves you of course, and anytime he feels as though you could do better, he’ll be waiting oh so conveniently at the nearest street corner, with your favorite snack in his hand, and his Ferrari ready to go to your favorite location, or his mansion for you two to have a meaningful and private talk. Kuro would feel honored for you to have chose him over Luciano, so of course, he would spoil you rotten. Well, as much as he could afford and all within reason. Unlike Luciano, he isn’t rich, but more well-off, so you could expect a gift at least once a week, and really adorable personalized thing. A marathon of your favorite anime/tv show complete with snacks and cuddling, private drawing sessions of his muse (you), and those cute classes like pottery and salsa dancing (even though he can’t dance for his life). Kuro loves you and he would definitely show it every single day.

Ending 3: You choose both

Lol what? For these two it’s difficult to get them to share, but they know that they both care about you too much to let you go that easily, so they will reluctantly agree. They kinda got along for work’s sake, but now that you would force them to get along, they would start liking each other. It’s more like the “You drive me crazy, in a bad way, but also a good way? What?” So after a while, they would eventually learn to like each other, possibly love, but lets not get a little too crazy tonight guys. Expect a lot of gifts from both ends, and a little bit of playful competition in the relationship between either the three of you or the two of them, depending on you personality.

Ending 4: You choose neither of them

Kuro and Luciano, at a complete loss for words, would agree to your wishes to choose neither of them. Whether it’s because you do not want a relationship, you fell in love with someone else other than them, or you just aren’t ready yet, they’ll understand and accept that you aren’t interested in them. They both wouldn’t take it personally since you didn’t choose either of them, so they would shake hands and call a truce. They would let you know that you would always be friends with them, and if you were every ready to date either of them, to let them know, and they’ll be standing on your doorstep with a bouquet of you favorite flowers asking you out on a date, and calling you their partner.

(Thank you anon for requesting this! I had a great time writing it, and thank you for allowing me to fulfill your request! I do hope you enjoy what I wrote, have a lovely day!❤️)

[ready-to-obeyme]

[OM!] Demon Brothers + Hobbies 🏊

Lucifer

what free time

when he does somehow peel himself off of work, he enjoys ballroom dancing

i can just imagine him putting on a vinyl song, holding up his arms and doing the steps to the dance (1, 2, 3... 1, 2, 3) and god forbid someone tries to come in during this time because he’d be too embarrassed to be lenient on their punishment

i imagine he’s super into learning other couple dances too like tango and salsa, so when you get together with him count on being his partner!

i bet he also loves teaching other people things-- like genuinely, considering he is the oldest of the seven (his brothers just test him LOL)

incredibly patient when showing you the steps, taking pride in your improvement and growing warm at the thought of you being able to dance with him at the next chance you get

and his weakness???? online shopping on akuzon 

which, when you find out, makes him extremely embarrassed and depending on whether you have the same past time-- you may or may not buy everything on akuzon

on his home screen interaction dialogue, he says something along the lines of “Akuzon is too convenient... it’s easy to buy a lot of things” while blushing

so I’m thinking sometimes when he does take a breather from his workload, he scrolls on akuzon just browsing for things because it’s quick

and ends up putting like 5 things into the cart  that he doesn’t really need

doesn’t always follow through and buy everything, but he definitely has moments where he impulse buys and it’s gone to bite him in the butt when packages arrive in droves and his brothers are like ??? why are there so many things

Mammon

loves music-- both listening and making it!

likes making his own mixtapes and playlists

and when he gets to share it with you, he’s so nervous; but the giddy happiness he feels when you tell him that it’s good is SO worth the wait and time he puts into his music

he’d be happy just having his mixtapes and music to himself but being able to share it with someone makes it a lot sweeter

definitely makes playlists for and about you because sometimes the feelings he can’t put into words he can tell you through music

idk if he has a recording studio in his room, but i think it’d be pretty fitting if there was

probably gets into composing his music, rapping mayhaps??

at some point likes to DJ as well, though he’s not too good as it rn, but he definitely loooooves playing with the sound effects and tracks

all of these things are him being able to express himself-- put a twist on something that already exists or creating something on his own

it gives him a sense of freedom: to express himself and to do whatever he wants as he pleases

pretty well-rounded when it comes to playing instruments

when he puts his mind to it, he can probably learn anything

most likely already knows how to play the guitar and the drums

has a pretty good voice too tbh

Leviathan

swimming!!

he may be a shut-in, but ya boy has ocean decor, can control sea creatures, so it’s only natural he can swim and swim well

doesn’t do it as often since he prefers watching anime/playing games loads more, but he it’s definitely something he enjoys since it feels like his natural place to be 

considering his dream is to be a professional gamer, it’s not far off to say that he finds it his hobby to start off small and be a youtuber, probably posting reviews of games he’s played or even writing out walk-throughs online

actually loves going to concerts and cons

if he was a fan of hatsune miku you BET he’d want to go to her first live concert with her life-sized hologram, waving the glowsticks in unison with the crowd

would definitely go all four days of Anime Expo where he would be SO happy surrounded by people who can love the same things he does with the same passion

loves creating cosplay to go to these cons by hand; impeccable detail and intense dedication into the craft that shows his love for whatever he’s making

kinda shy about wearing it, but if you’re down to wear any of his costumes, he’d absolutely die happy

it’s just too much love for him to handle in one sitting 

and ofc, hobbies include board games, games, DND, all those!!

Satan

asides from reading, loves traveling when he can whenever he can

he invites you out to places because he enjoys discovering new things and experiencing new things and traveling is the perfect way to do all of that all the time

he’d enjoy hiking too-- on trails, through the wilderness, among the wild; just give him a backpack, an explorers hat, maybe a walking stick (just like the ones in the movies) and he’s on his way!

loves going hiking with you because he likes the way your face lights up at new scenery or the wonders of the world

likes that he can share this enjoyment and excitement of discovery with you because it feels like he’s sharing a little bit of himself too

indoor activity is snuggling in the covers and having movie marathons! and now that he has you and all your movies on DVD (lol) he can now enjoy so much more things

and when he finds out about Netflix, he is NOT sleeping for DAYS

“Satan... did you sleep last night?”

“couldn’t. the new season of How to Get Away with Murder came out.”

SLAM POETRY

doesn’t think he’s very good, but definitely likes writing down in his journal and even some scattered words that form a bit of poetry sometimes

really really shy about sharing it, but if you coax him a little, he’d be willing to show you (though you’ll have a hard time convincing him to show you poetry he wrote about you)

people have said, and I agree, cat cafe is definitely something he’d seek out and enjoy; literal dream come true

a house of cats that lucifer can’t ban him from LMAO

Asmodeus

has a very creative mind and deft hands meant for craft (among other things ahem)

as a fashionable person and a trendsetter, he’d love making his own jewelry and clothes, picking out the beads and metalware for the earrings or bracelets and feeling out the cloth and stitches for his outfits

if levi IS into making cosplay, it’d be such a nice way for them to bond together since Levi is pretty good with picking out material too

i like to imagine he enjoys making jewelry for his brothers too:

a stud earring for mammon, maybe convincing him to explore other options and wear other jewelry too

giving his brothers the options of clip on earrings if they wanted to try something temporary, gives satan a golden bracelet, lucifer a silver ring etc

suuuuuper supportive of you if you wanted any type of piercings and would absolutely love it if you wore his jewelry

god he would bedazzle you in all his jewelry and clothes if he could

another hobby is doing yoga!!

good for the body and soul uwu

definitely gives a good reason for any of his flexibility, or maybe it’s because he’s naturally flexible that yoga is calming for him

also loves to invite you to do yoga with him

you’d definitely get a bit steamy doing certain positions with him, but MOST of the time, he does encourage you to stretch, relax, and strengthen your body

Beelzebub

so athletic he could probably play every sport

i agree with the masses: he’d DEFINITELY be good at hockey

basketball too (just imagine Kagami from Kuroko no Basuke)

you know what they say about big hands

big, strong hands, good for crafting that involves a little more strength, but considering he’s a pretty tender and patient guy, is great at sculpting with clay, which extends to pottery as well

just imagine him sitting near a kiln, spinning the clay and using his hands to shape the curve and notches of a pot

considering how many plates and bowls he’s probably eaten, it makes for a good way to replace them HAHA

good at crafting with glass too considering it requires steady hands and strength to spin glass evenly

enjoys a lot of arts and crafts and loves giving them as gifts, especially if they’re made from his own hands

one of the main reasons why he started and likes doing these as a hobby actually

adores the look on you face when you created a glass terrarium for your plants or created glass ornaments dyed with your favorite colors

would definitely be the type of person to put his hands on yours as he teaches you how to shape the clay and have plenty of fun with you watching you try to make glass ornaments with or without success

Belphegor

during his waking hours, he loves to study the stars

loved to watch them in the human world, but without a night sky, he’s content with looking up for constellations in books from the library

if you buy him the cute lamp that lights stars onto the ceiling, he’ll find you so endearing because he’d enjoy lying in bed with you and just looking up at the lights and being in each other’s arms-- imagining the day he gets to do this with you for real, on a picnic blanket, looking up at the moon and stars

i imagine he’d like to doodle too

i say MAINLY doodles because they’re easier like drawing chibis or whatever thinks is amusing and lowkey keeps him awake (though Lucifer doesn’t like it when he draws on the desks)

does sometimes go all out and draw amazingly well, whenever the mood strikes him

when you ask him, he jokingly says you’re his muse; but honestly wouldn’t put it past him to have drawn a portrait of you, awake or asleep, at some point

surprisingly good at sewing-- or at the very least mending rips and tears

i feel like beel has a lot of ripped shirts (...from being, yknow, ripped) so he’s gotten pretty good at simple stitches, which eventually evolved into something more

didn’t start off as a hobby but he did eventually find it soothing to sew and embroider

levi and asmodeus adore his skills and he grumbles, but doesn’t ever say ‘no’ to them when they ask for his help

[mittaldentalclinic]

Cosmetic Gum Surgery - Restore the Brilliant Smile of Your Youth

Any kind of surgery (especially dental) can cause a tense sensation in the spine. But the procedure of cosmetic gum surgery carried out by a certified cosmetic dentistry specialist is fairly easy and can dramatically enhance your smile's appearance. - cosmetic gum surgery in jaipur

Cosmetic surgery is the primary solution to two kinds of dental issues that are known as those with the "long tooth" look and the "gummy smile". Both of these problems typically result from gum disease, aging or bad oral hygiene. They are progressively worsened as you the passage of time. Cosmetic gum surgery may aid patients suffering from gum collapse within the region of missing teeth, darkened areas that are between implants, crowns or other teeth as well as tooth sensitivity due to receding gums.

"The "long tooth" look is due to receding gums or an unsatisfactory bite. As we get older the gums naturally shrink, and then reced. The result is that your teeth are exposed at an area of the gumline.

"Gummy Smile "gummy smile" is caused by excessive gum tissue which makes the teeth appear small. People who have a gummy-looking smile are often embarrassed by their gums being that is visible when they smile.

How is Cosmetic Gum Surgery Performed?

The two primary kinds of gum surgeries for cosmetic purposes which are utilized to improve the look of long teeth as well as the look of a gummy smile differ. The gummy smile correction surgery eliminates extra gum and bone. The cosmetic dentist generally employs a laser for this type of procedure. A soft-tissue laser is used to remove excessive gum tissue. A special laser is used to remove the excess bone.

The process for correcting the look of a long tooth operates in a similar method as a skin graft. The cosmetic dentist takes natural skin cells from your mouth, and then grafts it to the gum line. It is the result: a natural-looking gum line that is reinforced.

Before you undergo any kind or cosmetic procedure be sure to discuss the procedure to your dental professional. The procedure could be part of an overall strategy that includes a variety of components to enhance your smile. Cosmetic gum surgery can be combined with the treatment of bridges, veneers and crowns, or other cosmetic dentistry procedures to make your smile appear the best it can. This could need more than one dentist, if all procedures need to be performed at once.

Will I Be Awake for This Procedure?

You should discuss this issue in conjunction with your dentist cosmetic. There are two options:

You can have the procedure completed in a series appointments in the office. The cosmetic dentist will apply an local anesthetic every occasion to set the location of the gums that they will be working with. It is possible of using lasers to fix the smile that is gummy. Every visit may result in more bone and gum tissue being removed.

It is possible to receive an general anaesthetic, and then get all the work completed at the same time. This is a possibility in the event that you require surgery done on the mouth's roof to straighten a long smile. If you are in need of other services such as dental implants , or the preparation of veneers you should have all of the work performed while under anaesthetic. There are always risks when you are under general anesthetic, therefore, be sure to avoid having more than one procedure to perform dental work.

How Long Will It Take To Recover From Cosmetic Gum Surgery?

The speed at which you recover is contingent the overall condition of your body as well as the extent of your surgery. There are however, crucial steps you can follow to help you recovery.

A responsible person should accompany you to your appointment. This is essential if you're having an general anaesthetic. It is it is also recommended if having a thaw and are taking painkillers. Follow your cosmetic dentist's post-treatment instructions with care. They might suggest that you wash your mouth with an antibacterial product for at least 2 weeks following the procedure to help prevent infection. Contact the dental hygienist or cosmetic dentist explain how you should clean your teeth until your gums have healed.

Make sure you eat a soft or liquid diet for the next few days following the procedure. Oatmeal, soups, yogurt and other healthy options will help you feel strong and help speed the healing process and won't cause irritation to your gums. Avoid foods that are acidic or spicy like salsa, which could cause inflammation to the gums that are sensitive after surgery.

How Much Will This Cost Me?

The cost of surgery will depend on the volume of work completed. If you require multiple cosmetic dentists to carry out multiple procedures simultaneously anticipate that the cost will be more. General anaesthesia will cost more since it has to be administered by a licensed anaesthesiologist.

Similar to any procedure the cost shouldn't be your main consideration. Make sure you find the most skilled and knowledgeable cosmetic dentists to do the work. Look through their portfolios, phone their references, and ask questions until you're confident that you have all the information you have to be aware of the procedure.

Once you have your strategy set, begin working on financing the procedure. Many people have saved up for the procedure because it's a cosmetic issue that has significantly impacted their confidence in themselves and they cannot wait to undergo the procedure. Some may have experienced an injury that was sudden or severe sensitivities that make the procedure required, but outside of their budget. Consult with the cosmetic dentist in Jaipur if you choose to come up with an option that is affordable through financing such as payment plans, credit line or loan credit.

Maintain your gums throughout the months and years following surgery by flossing, brushing and seeing your dentist for routine check-ups. Do your best to avoid gingivitis as well as other periodontal conditions that could force you in the future to go through gum surgery in the near future.

For More Info: Rct treatment

[publichealthcare99]

Top Information That Can't Be Overlooked On Diabetes

New Post has been published on https://thebestsolution4u.com/top-information-that-cant-be-overlooked-on-diabetes/

Top Information That Can't Be Overlooked On Diabetes

Top Information That Can’t Be Overlooked On Diabetes

Believe it or not, diabetes is one of the most common diseases out there. It can strike at any time and it doesn’t rightly matter if you’re living a preventative lifestyle. You can still contract the disease. If you have diabetes, it’s high time you started learning about how to tame the disease. Use these tips to help you out.

Top Information That Can’t Be Overlooked On Diabetes

Yogurt is an excellent way for a diabetic to convince their mouth that low-fat, sugar-free food IS enjoyable. Have a cup of non-fat yogurt mixed with seasonable fruit for breakfast with a high-fiber muffin and a glass of milk so that you’ll have enough energy to last you right through until lunch.

When a child has Diabetes, you need to ensure that everyone in their life is aware of the consequences of not adhering strictly to their new eating rules. If they go to their Grandparents’ house, ensure they know how important it is for the child to only receive healthy snacks.

For people with diabetes, it is important to check your glucose level after heavy exercise. Exercise can keep consuming glucose for up to 24 hours later, so it’s best to check your glucose level every 45 minutes or so after your workout to see if your glucose level is dropping or remaining stable.

Want a tasty treat that won’t be forbidden by your doctor due to your Diabetes? Try nachos! Use a low fat cheese, low fat sour cream, homemade guacamole, and salsa, and you’ll be getting a ton of nutrition with a burst of flavor. If you add some beans to the salsa you’ll have an even healthier snack!

If you’re going to go a non-traditional route for your diabetes treatment, continue to be under the supervision of a doctor. Make sure to visit him at least every 3 months, so he can check your blood sugar levels, blood pressure and cholesterol. He should also test your organ functions, at the intervals he sets for you.

If your doctor tells you that your Diabetes pills aren’t doing enough to keep your blood glucose levels in check, don’t panic. You won’t necessarily have to use needles as insulin pens are now available that give you the dose you need without being painful. If you can’t afford these pens, some pharmaceuticals have programs to assist you like Needy Meds.

If you have been diagnosed with diabetes or at high risk of acquiring the disease, it is vitally important that you lose weight. About 80 percent of all diabetics are overweight carrying excess body fat has been proven to contribute to the development of the disease. Losing weight is often times all one needs to do to completely control all diabetes symptoms.

A Diabetic will need more than just a physician on his health care team. You should ask for a referral to an endocrinologist (they’ll help you with your insulin), a registered dietitian or nutritionist, an optometrist or ophthalmologist, a dentist, and a podiatrist. Once you have them all on your team you’ll be ready to fight Diabetes head on!

When eating healthy for a Diabetic diet, compare the items various stores sell and see who has the best prices on specific items. I like to keep a spreadsheet on my phone which shows each item I buy regularly, and which store I can get it at the best price so I can stock up when I go to that store.

Do not rely on chocolate for a quick fix if your blood glucose levels drop. While most diabetics feel that this is a harmless remedy, it may actually have the opposite effect. The body absorbs fatty foods far more slowly, so you will notice a faster increase in glucose if you opt for a sweet, but fat-free, food.

Women, especially when in their teens and early twenties, may experience significant fluctuations in their blood glucose levels in the week immediately leading up to their menstrual period. Monitor your levels frequently during this time, then make any necessary adjustments in your insulin dosages and urinary ketone measurements, as this can prevent further spikes.

If you struggle with diabetes, a great tip is to always include healthy carbohydrates in your diet. People with type 2 diabetes who eat a minimal amount of carbohydrates have very low energy and extreme headaches. You should aim to include healthy carbohydrates such as fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. You will have more energy and less headaches.

If you want to choose a treat that might be high in sugar, go for an item that is also high in protein. For example, ice cream has a lot of protein to help you break down the sugar in it. Another option is cheesecake with a high fiber crust. Yogurt with berries can also be a great treat, especially if you use non-fat unsweetened yogurt like kefir.

It is very helpful to have at least one friend who also has diabetes. This is someone that you will lean on for support when you are just not feeling good, and someone that can depend on you when they need a friend. You will also be able to learn about what their doctor is doing that may be different from the treatment you are getting. Just remember not to change anything without consulting a medical professional first.

Make sure that if you are diabetic and you are going to be traveling by airplane, that you drink a lot of water. The cabin’s air is a lot drier than normal air is and it can cause thirst, especially in those that have diabetes. You should be able to pass through airport security with water bottles if you can prove that you have diabetes.

Although it’s too late to prevent diabetes now, it’s not too late to take the steps necessary to rise above this disease. Learning how to deal with your diabetes is only half of the battle here. The onus is now on you to put a plan together in order to fight this disease.

[msmovingforward]

Proud Mama

We open with triumphant Mormon choir music to establishing shots, informing us we are back in Salt Lake City. I’m shocked and betrayed that we didn’t get anymore footage of Kimberly the Hypnotist, but c’est la vie; it’s not as if we had an extra-long episode this week. Whitney is meditating in her home. Lisa is at her office at Vida Tequila (LOVE THAT!). We see several flashbacks to Jen screaming at Whitney to shut the fuck up, and Kimberly the Hypnotist asking Lisa to take a good hard look at her friendship with Jen. Heather thinks back to Jen raising her hand when asked if anyone doesn’t trust Heather. We head back to see Belle from Beauty and the Beast still trapped in a high castle by her misunderstood captor, or I mean Mary the grandfather fucker in her 8,000 square foot home, thinking about how she warned everyone Jen would ruin this trip! SHE BLINKED SO MANY TIMES! CAN SOMEONE HELP HER?! BLINK IF YOU NEED HELP, MARY! BLINK IF YOU NEED HELP! Needless to say, this was a trip from HELL! These women may have left Vegas and checked out of the Hotel Nomad, but what happened there certainly didn’t stay there.

More choir music, and we’re at Heather’s new Beauty Lab and Laser location, complete with 15-minute Botox parking spots. So if you’re just at this strip mall to get a Diet Coke from a 7-11 on the GOOD side of the tracks, you better find parking elsewhere! Between seeing Lisa’s office and Heather’s new Beauty Lab location, we’ve now officially doubled the number of filming locations for this show! The new location looks like the set of a reboot for Xanadu. Everything is pink and white. Pink angel wings adorn the wall, symbolizing Heather’s ascent into independence from her ex husband. Heather tells us in a confessional this has to look great. She can’t just light a candle and say it’s done! I mean Sheree did this for her housewarming on Atlanta, but this is Salt Lake City, the land of integrity!

Heather addresses her team, saying that she’s had a rough weekend in Vegas, so if she’s short with people that’s why. Such great management skills! Remind your entire team that while they were probably working to make your vision a reality, you were away on a girls’ trip, filming a TV show less than a week before your grand opening! An employee tells Heather something about her stanchions, a word Heather had never heard before. Whitney shows up and remarks how pretty the stanchion ropes are. Thank God Whitney could remember her lines this week!

Heather and Whitney discuss the fact that neither of them have spoken to Jen since the trip, and Whitney informs us in her testimonial that she would uninvite Jen to the grand opening if it were her. “Is Heather addicted to toxicity?” She asks. Well, let’s see! Beyond the fact that Heather and Whitney are both ex Mormons who are on a reality show about women yelling at each other, Heather is literally opening a second location for a business that shoots toxins into middle-aged women’s foreheads and eye sockets, so they can’t express emotions or look old. Heather’s livelihood LITERALLY depends on the availability of toxicity.

In the next scene, we see Lisa touching a fabulously green handbag and heading into a bar called Lake Effect. Before we cut to commercial, it is revealed that she is there to meet up with none other than Jen Shah herself! Now I’m excited. It seems like Lisa is living up to her Lisa Housewife ancestors (Vanderpump, Rinna, Et Al.) and has sensed that Jen is weak and malleable. You need a friend, don’t you, Jen, darling? Lisa informs us that when leaving Vegas she saw Jen in tears on the elevator, and the human in her just had to ask what the real story was. She informs Jen that she’s just like her. She wants to be loyal to her friendships and her word. Hmm.. interesting because I’m pretty sure Jen was literally JUST spreading rumors about your other best friend’s marriage. Even I’m a little bit confused, falling for this classic manipulative trap. My heart really does break a little bit for Jen, who I think is truly losing her mind. I’m brought back to reality, though, when Lisa tells Jen that she can’t threaten to drown Whitney in her pond after Jen says she feels like her words are constantly taken out of context. Jen tells Lisa that she only talks like that because she felt like she constantly had to be ready to fight growing up in Salt Lake City, which is predominantly White.

We head to Meredith’s house where we are treated to a vomit-inducing scene of Meredith slicing half a banana for Seth. Seth informs her that he likes quarters instead of halves. Meredith fills Seth in on the happenings in Vegas, which Seth refers to as “Toxic city cicity.” Meredith can’t handle all the volatility in this group of friends. She repeatedly disengaged in Vegas, and obviously Vegas is really a city where you want to dis-disengage. You want to be so engaged in Vegas, and it’s unengaging when you have to disengage. It’s like the Blackjack dealer asks, “Do you want to hit or stay?” and Meredith just has to disengage. Meredith tells us that her marriage has been just so wonderful lately, and it’s all positivity. She throws shade at Jen in her confessional, saying that some of the other women are probably just jealous of how successful her marriage is, which is why they need to spread rumors about it. Right, Meredith, we’re all super jealous of the fact that your husband can sleep with his eyes open at dinner and simultaneously accuse you of cheating because you won’t let him go through your phone.

Whitney informs us that her father is 90 days sober, so she’s going to let him near her head with scissors in a room full of aspiring Mormon hairdressers. He does absolutely nothing to Whitney’s hair and makes several dad jokes, and the audience is led to believe that his audition for this hairdressing school went well. My heart breaks for a second time this episode when Whitney says, “I feel like a proud Momma,” even though she’s the daughter in this relationship.

Meredith visits Heather at Beauty Lab. Meredith informs Heather that she’s sure Jen does have shit she’s dealing with, but she’s angry because Jen has hurt her family and marriage with her lies. Heather says that she needs to be strong and not “put up and shut up” like she did for years in her marriage. If her daughters were in a friendship like this, she would advise them to stay away.

Lisa, her husband, and her kids, Jack and Henry, are at a meeting with Sydney, who is either high up at Vida Tequila or low on the totem pole and was able to be convinced to be on TV. Either way, she has to sit through fifteen year old Henry’s Fresh Wolf business proposal. Lisa continuously reminds her kids, who are almost as disengaged as Meredith, that they can have anything, including Land Rover Defenders and McClarens, if they “What?” “Work for it!” Lisa says that Henry will be the first 9 year old with a McClaren (”I love that! I love it.”) I remember visiting my mom at work and being given the money to start companies and buy luxury cars in front of assistants who probably make $15 an hour. Pretty standard reward for getting a B+ on a report card. Jack starts his business proposal. “Yeah so Fresh Wolf is a company.” Henry interrupts from the white board on which he is writing Fresh Wolf over and over again. “I came up with the name! How smart are these straws!?” Henry has a brain fart and has to start over after Lisa reminds him that it’s always important to hold up a picture of the product when you’re pitching it, especially if you’re wearing your best backwards hat and bright yellow-green hoodie. I love that. That I love. I love it. Touch the picture, Jack. Jack’s full proposal is as follows: “The ingredient you need most, Dad, is turmeric because it restores hair or stimulates hair growth or something.. so uh yeah that's Fresh Wolf.” Sidney pretends to be truly impressed. John says, “Wow,” and Lisa informs us via confessional that Fresh Wolf has really given them the opportunity to reconnect as a family  Even though Lisa has just chugged a liter of Diet Coke from the 7-11 next to Beauty Lab, she’s starving, so they all head to Taco Bell, then Burger King, then Checkers for lunch. Everyone that is, except Henry, whom they forget. It’s ok. He’ll get there if he works hard.

We head to Mary’s church, where we are shown an actual photo of Jesus with Mary’s grandmother/husband’s late wife. Mary is dressed in Beyonce at Coachella realness. It’s time for choir practice, which Mary informs us in her testimonial is not going well. They need to practice every day, but they can only practice once a week. It’s hard as a viewer to make a judgment on this though because Mary stops their singing every few seconds to ask how much they love her, criticize someone’s weight gain, (“Do me a favor. Eat healthy. Drink water!”), or tell someone they’re daydreaming. I wonder... if these people weren’t probably working two full-time jobs to afford the second mortgages they took out to be members of Mary’s church, could they have choir practice more often?

Next the audience is again reminded of what a wonderful husband Sharrieff is, as he sets up a table of chocolate-covered strawberries inside a dance studio for date night, which is a salsa dancing lesson. He informs us that Jen has always begged for him to bring her to salsa lessons. I have to say, while I imagine not having your husband around most of the year must be a struggle, it’s not as if Sharrieff doesn’t make the most of his limited time with Jen. This date is extremely thoughtful and romantic. Jen walks in, and she’s clearly very impressed and excited. She sees the trophies, and asks, “Am I going to get a trophy?” Sharrieff replies, “No, honey.” In the same tone I might use to tell a child that Grandma isn’t coming over for dinner anymore. This tiny moment made me realize again just how much people in Jen’s orbit must have to walk on eggshells. Sharrieff probably saw an opportunity for crazy Jen to come out and throw a tantrum after realizing she wasn’t going to get a trophy for her one salsa dancing lesson. God, I love this show! The couple salsa dance, and both of them are actually very good. Naturally, as Jen informs us that Sharrieff WAS in a dance group in junior high school. Jen again laments to Sharrieff about how misunderstood she is by the other women, and Sharrieff once again very patiently therapizes her. I was shocked to find out that they have been married 26 years. Can someone please tell me if that’s a record for a marriage that Bravo has ruined? That’s got to be a record! There’s no way they’ll still be married if Jen makes it to a season three...

At last the moment we’ve been waiting for all season arrives! Heather is FINALLY opening her second Mormon purification center. This one used to be a Quiznos! Meredith asks Brooks what she thinks of her outfit, a leather tuxedo with a sparkling lapel. He says it’s “Beyond,” but she decides she’s going to take off her pants entirely, and just make it a “blazer dress.” Lisa informs her husband that she’s going to wear Versace because who doesn’t love Versace. I think he’s just excited that his kids have piano lessons, so he doesn’t have to get an experimental chemical peel. The party is pink, and Heather is serving us Frenchie’s trouble in tinting class. This party has everything: buff gay bartenders with judging eyes, napkins that say messy af (Mary: “What does AF stand for? After the fact?”), wing-shaped cookies, stanchions! Meredith arrives wearing a mask that looks like it came from a very expensive piece of medical equipment, which she informs us is high fashion, and she wouldn’t expect anyone who isn’t as elegant as she to understand it. Mary looks like a cross between an Olsen twin and an extra from Gossip Girl. Lisa arrives, asking, “Does X marks the spot?” before posing in front of the step and repeat. Heather has invited her ex husband, who says he approves, calling the event “next level.” It must be pretty impressive if he got out of his hot tub for it! Heather introduces Meredith to a friend, saying Meredith is a burn victim. The friend says she should wear the mask all the time... Whitney really does a big Whitney zing on Meredith’s mask, putting on two surgical masks in her confessional. Boom! We learn that Meredith’s dress was designed in part by Brooks, which means it must be one of a kind. Mary says something about chicken turkeys as Meredith sips a straw right through her mask. Everyone at this party is basically wearing very shiny pajamas. Lisa reveals to Meredith that she and Jen met up after Vegas, to which Meredith says she can’t control whom Lisa is friends with, but she definitely needs some space from the situation. Mary joins Whitney at the oxygen bar (Mary: “I need oxygen, doxygen, estrogen, YEStrogen!”). Whitney tells Mary she was right; after Mary was out of Jen’s line of fire in Vegas, Whitney just became her next target. 

Enter Jen...

Whitney tells Jen she felt like Jen’s punching bag in Vegas. Jen offers a very sincere apology that offers no excuses, which Whitney seems to accept. It’s like Jen is wearing a wire with Sharrieff in her hear telling her exactly what to say all night. In her confessional, Jen reveals that she was just being nice at the time, and she wasn’t really sorry at all because she saw some wing-shaped cookies across the room, and she was hungry. This makes much more sense with the other things I’ve seen across this franchise. Good housewifing, Jen! Heather gives her thank you speech, which again affirms Heather as an independent woman who blah blah blah. We are shown footage of Meredith telling a closet case Mormon man that it’s always a bad idea to ignore bad energy, when Jen walks over to tell Meredith how unacceptable it is that Jen was talking about Meredith’s marriage. Meredith says, “No. It’s not,” and we are treated to a sonic boom sound effect. Meredith again says she needs to “protect her positive space”, but hopefully if Jen proves that she can be trustworthy, the two can move forward. Jen says to Meredith’s face that she respects that decision, but says in her confessional that she thinks Meredith is crazy. Heather walks over, and Meredith gives the two their own space, so she and her Tron mask can continue to protect their positive energy pod elsewhere. Jen and Heather get into a heated discussion, which upsets Lisa Barlow, Queen of Sundance, to the point where she thinks she may have to call security, and of all the parties she’s thrown, she’s never had to call security. She insinuates herself into the situation, saying “Can you guys whisper?” Jen gives her worst apology of the night, and Heather once again forgives her after Jen says the words that Heather literally has to tell her to say.

What a season! We learn that Jen has bought another friend, Heather has learned that she’s her own person, Whitney has a skincare line, Mary is reorganizing her closet, Lisa is taking a family vacation to Mexico, and Meredith and Seth are back in Couples counseling.

What a long episode!