#(speaking of characters that never get talked about…seeing no one talking about my man zero is also a major crime honestly)

[ncthandrake]

gonna try and get on my desktop and ps5 later to play & record some games so if anyone has any gif requests feel free to send any ! 💖

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Sum of All 1

Warnings: non/dubcon, mentions of crime, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: mob!Steve Rogers

Part of the mob drabbles au

Summary: you are given an unexpected assignment.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

You sigh and back up through the file explorer. Come on. Your frustration bubbles up until you feel sweat on your scalp. You squint at the screen, searching for what you need. You blow out through your lips and reach for your mug. The white one with the small agency’s logo on it. 

“Mr. Brenner,” you pivot your chair as you put your cup down, “I can’t find the Dubeau files. I was almost finished--” 

“Dubeau? Never heard of ‘em,” he doesn’t look away from his screen. You tense and nod. 

“Of course, sir, I must be misremembering.” 

You don’t argue. Not out loud. Just like always, you roll over and take it all. You hold it all in. When you lost something, you resign yourself to it. When you miss the train, you sit down and wait for the next, and when you’re told something is a certain way, it must be. And if not, you’ rather wait for the truth to leak through then speak up and make yourself the fool. 

You click around the files. That means you can move on. There’s a backlog of accounts to get through as it is. Ever since Wallace quit, you’ve been doing his work too. It was so unexpected. Strange how abrupt that was. He left his jacket behind but he still hasn’t come to get it. Well, once you find a better firm, you’re out the door just as fast. 

“Carson. It needs to be done,” Brenner says as he clicks his mouse lazily. 

You glance over. You can see the reflection of his screen in the glass of his framed accountant certification on the wall. It doesn’t look like a spread sheet. The colours move and you try not to think about what they resemble. 

“Got it, sir.” 

“What about Williams?” Geraldine suggests. 

Brenner clucks, “delete that. Thought I already did.” 

The tapping of keys continues. Geraldine is old and slow. Her work is reliable but not timely, and Brenner, the senior accountant, tends to do better at sweet talking clients than the paperwork. 

You focus on the Carson file. Like many of the clients, it’s a mess. Assets all over. Photos of wrinkled documents and few of loose cash on indeterminate surfaces. You don’t ask questions. You just figure it out. The place isn’t your first choice but with zero experience, it’s the only way you’ll have any. It’s a pathway to a better destination. 

The office is stagnant but for the clacking of keyboards and clicking of mice. Only Brenner’s heavy huffs and Geraldine’s incessant sniffling interrupt. You lean on your elbow as you compare your two monitors and input values. 

The front door opens and Geraldine stands. She deals with the walk-ins. She enjoys chatting with them. Sometimes too much. You suspect she doesn’t get much conversation with her two cats. 

“Oh, hello, aren’t you a strapping young man. My, oh, I know you,” she chimes, “Mr. Rogers. Yes, I recall.” 

The man sighs in response. You glance over as Mr. Brenner stands so quickly that his chair rolls back into the wall. He clears his throat and hurries around his desk. You haven’t seen him react like that for anyone. 

You stare at the man across from Geraldine. He’s tall and well-dressed. He wears a pinstripe suit with a pressed white collared-shirt, a sleek grey tie down his chest. Despite his tailored attire, his hair is overgrown, his beard too. There’s a permanent stitch in his forehead. 

Rogers... it sounds familiar. 

“Sir,” Brenner extends his hand as he approaches the other man, “how are ya? What can I do for ya today?” 

The other man looks at him dully and ignores his handshake. He sniffs and peers around at the beige walls. The place is enough to drive anyone mad. 

“I need an accountant.” 

“I didn’t know you were looking? Brian--” 

“Shut up about Brian,” the man snarls. “I’m not hear to chat.” 

“Well, I can take care of it--” 

“You won’t,” Rogers insists. “The things you click on, I don’t need that risk. It’s off the books. No digital trail.” 

“Right,” Brenner agrees, “Wallace is... gone--” 

“Didn’t ask,” Rogers turns away from him and looks past the empty desk to you, “her. Come on.” 

He snaps then curls his fingers. Brenner bounces on his heels anxiously, “um, right, but Geraldine is more experienced--” 

“She’s wearing orthotics. I need someone who can run around,” the man snaps.  

“Yes, sir, of course, sir. I don’t mean to overstep,” Pete shows his palms. “Get your bag, sweetie. You’re gonna help Mr. Rogers for the day.” 

“More than a day,” he says as he checks his watch. 

“As long as you need,” Brenner agrees. 

You save the spreadsheet and slowly close down the Excel sheet. You wheel back in your chair, unsure, and reach beneath for the leather briefcase you splurged on when you got the job. When you still thought it was a professional office. 

“I heard about the engagement,” Brenner lowers his voice but the place is too small not to hear, “Sorry, buddy, that’s tough--” 

“I didn’t ask what you think,” Rogers bristles. 

You peer over again and find him staring. Impatiently. 

“Right, right, was just saying--” 

“And I’m not your buddy,” he growls. 

“Of course, sir,” Brenner preens. “I’m digging the new look. Growing out the hair. Very in vogue--” 

“Enough,” he waves past Brenner to you. “Let’s go. Boss is waiting.” 

You get up and snap the clasp on the plum briefcase as you shuffle in your kitten heels. You approach the man as you grip the handle and offer your other hand formally. “Hi, sir,” you introduce yourself. “What can I help with?” 

“We’ll get to it. For now, stay close,” he looks at his watch again. 

“Glad to be of service, sir,” Pete says. “I’ll waive the invoice--” 

He’s once more ignored as Rogers spins and marches for the door. Tension curdles in his wake and you look around. Brenner gives you a toothy cringe and shoos you, “don’t keep him waiting and for god sakes, smile.” 

You raise your brows as Geraldine returns to her desk. She sits stiffly as she rubs her hip and offers a sheepish look, “good luck, dearie.” 

Their nervous demeanour fills you with dread. Who exactly is this Mr. Rogers and why are they all so afraid of him? You can only be sure that you should be too. 

[ronearoundblindly]

Hi Lexi, I have an ask 😏

I keep seeing these pranks girlfriends are doing on their boyfriends on TikTok where the girl is talking to her man about her waxing appointment she just had and she casually says 'HE was great' or 'HE did a great job’

How do you think the Chris characters would react? 😂😂

Warnings for Lexi getting on her professional high horse and inferences to, well, the areas that get waxed.

Hi. I'm Lexi, and this is my job. I wax people for a living and am about to get extremely serious for a moment before our fun imagines...

IF the person is professional, there is zero reason a male or female waxologist should matter. Of course, it is important for the client themselves to be most comfortable, but men and women can be equally good at this job and equally shit at it. I say this knowing that I went to school with a handful of women that did not care about the comfort or safety of their clients, only money and time. I'd say it was as bad as 50/50. The sex or sexual orientation of your professional doesn't actually matter, and I find it childish that any man would get huffy or jealous as long as the service is done professionally and well for the actual client. I would personally punch any man (yes, even those with faces as pretty as above) for being a sexist, assuming dickhead in this manner.

James Mace

Curious. Sorta wants to come with you to your next appointment and ask how a man gets into that line of work, since it is more rare. Mace would also be curious if you were shocked at first that a man would wax you. Did you feel uncomfortable at first? Has more than one man waxed you? Is this...is this a thing he can learn to help with? He's simply never thought about it before.

Curtis Everett

Weirdly 'classic man' about it and thinks it's bizarre a man waxes people. He just thinks that sounds like a woman's profession and a woman's service. Cringes and hisses at the mere thought of hair being ripped from his own body, so Curtis cannot fathom why anyone does it, man or woman.

Jimmy Dobyne

Doesn't give a rat's ass if there's hair down there, so mostly he's just indifferent to the whole situation. If you start talking about 'how cute' your waxer is, however, that's another story. Would probably assume the man is gay, too, and would express shock if you said otherwise. To Jimmy though, a job is a job. Whatever.

Johnny Storm

Simultaneously doesn't care and is fascinated. He's a try-anything-once person, so Johnny kinda wants to know what that feels like AND will be an enormous baby about the pain of waxing. He would be equally fascinated if the professional were female or male to be honest, though he'd be slightly more goofy and flirtatious with a woman. Johnny--as you may guess--would love to make you jealous so that he can 'prove himself' to you over and over again; he isn't a jealous type on his own.

Jake Jensen

Dead silence. Doesn't mention a fucking thing about how he feels but internally screaming. Deeply angry that not only did a man see you that way but also that a man is doing something 'painful' to you and that Jake didn't know before. Does a background check on your professional without ever saying a word to you. Only brings it up if there's something suspicious in the man's record. Refuses to be 'that guy' and voice his discomfort. Hopes you both never speak of it again...or the man retires soon and you see a woman.

Lloyd Hansen

Can you guess? I feel by now you can guess what I'm going to say.

Lloyd (that's right) doesn't. give. a. fuck.

Good. Get waxed. There is no need to talk about it. He just cares that it's done, not about any of the specifics.

Ari Levinson

Horrified that anyone waxes anything. Vaguely interested that a man offers it. Asks you what he looks like--i.e. does a man with a lot of hair (like Ari) wax other people or is he rather hairless himself? Ari shivers while considering it and promptly forgets all about it.

Ransom Drysdale

Did the job get done? Fine. Is the guy your only option for someone to wax you? No. Will Ran call your salon and insist you never be booked with the guy (or any guy) again? Yes. Yes he will.

Does Ran tell you he did that? No. Does he care if you know? Also no, but he ain't fucking discussing it. End of story.

Andy Barber

Literally has twelve other things to talk about with you so he doesn't care at all. Would forever prefer enjoying the results then getting hung up on the methods...

Steve Rogers

Has NO IDEA how to respond to that. Has NO IDEA if he should care or be mad or be interested or offer any words whatsoever. Is SO AWKWARD when moving on to another topic of discussion.

Bucky Barnes

Grumpy. First suggests and then insists that he do it for you/help. Verbally observes that it would save money and time to simply do it at home; emotionally unhinged at the wave of possessive rage he feels in the moment. He isn't proud of the response, but he also isn't letting that continue. Full-stop.

Thank you for asking!

[Main Masterlist; Who Would...Masterlist; Ko-Fi]

@supraveng @1950schick @patzammit @whiskeytangofoxtrot555

@yiiiikesmish @ashesofblackroses @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory

@brandycranby @buckysprettybaby @ellethespaceunicorn

@late-to-the-party-81 @bigtreefest @mistressmkay @astheskycries

@rogersbarber @blogbog710 @yenzys-lucky-charm

[evilbihan]

Bi-Han is an honorable man

I can't believe that I'm making yet another post pointing out the obvious but every time I go into a Youtube comment section I'm starting to question whether me and the rest of the Mortal Kombat fandom have even played the same game.

1. He shows opponents mercy

Sub-Zero: You want peace? Let us be. Liu Kang: The Lin Kuei's sins aren't easily forgiven.

Sub-Zero: Surrender and Shao will show mercy. Mileena: If you believe that, you're a fool.

Sub-Zero: Walk away while you can. Raiden: I'll never give up, never surrender.

Sub-Zero: I won't hold back, Brother. Scorpion: Do your worst.

Sub-Zero: We have no cause for dispute. Kitana: You aided Shao's attempt to steal the throne!

These dialogues honestly speak for themselves already, they don't even need explaining. Compare that to actual villains like General Shao who sends Reiko after Bi-Han to kill him simply because he "doesn't like loose ends" even after Bi-Han saved him or Shang Tsung who killed Reptile's family out of nothing but sheer cruelty.

The fact that Bi-Han is willing to let people walk away from a fight, that he gives them a chance to walk away alive, speaks volumes about his personality. He warns his opponents in his intros and even during his end of round taunts ("Flee now and live."), he tries to solve things peacefully and without violence if possible. He's not bloodthirsty, malicious or eager to kill anyone, but will do so if given no other choice.

Despite Bi-Han's flaws, a man willing to show an opponent mercy is an honorable man. SPOILERS AHEAD: May I again remind you that Kuai Liang is not willing to show a defeated and dying Bi-Han mercy when he gets turned into Noob against his will? Not only that, but Kuai Liang wouldn't have hesitated to kill Frost who is probably around Hanzo's age at his own wedding if Harumi hadn't stepped in to save her. Harumi had to beg Kuai Liang to show someone mercy, while Bi-Han grants it without a second thought. Like it or not, at least in that one aspect, Bi-Han is the better man.

I don't know why some people think of him as this aggressive guy going around trying to pick fights with everyone when all he wants is to be left alone? It's wild to me how people think he's the problem here.

2. He respects/admires their fighting skills

Sub-Zero: You will surely test my might. Ashrah: I will overwhelm it, Sub-Zero.

Sub-Zero: This fight I will long remember. General Shao: Who says you will survive it?

Sub-Zero: I'm pleased to fight Outworld's foremost mage. Rain: Will it also please you to lose?

Sub-Zero: I hear your skills are formidable. Li Mei: As are those of all who have been Umgadi.

Can we also talk about how respectful Bi-Han is towards his opponents? He compliments them on their skills as opposed to Kuai Liang who even talks down to his own allies. Yes, Bi-Han is arrogant, but he can still acknowledge other people's strengths and respect them, even if they are his foes.

3. He admits when he's wrong

Sub-Zero: I was wrong to trust you. General Shao: Yes, Earthrealmer. You were.

Sub-Zero: I wasn't aware of Shang Tsung's experiments. Liu Kang: Had you known, would your choice have been different?

Sub-Zero: Your mother's death is regrettable. Kitana: I consider you complicit, Bi-Han.

You can say what you want about him, but he certainly takes responsibility for his actions and even shows regret over some of them. Bi-Han might not be the most compassionate character, but he does express some sympathy towards others. Compare that to Kuai Liang who tells Havik it's his own fault that his face was burned off as if he had nothing to do with it. Yes, Bi-Han doesn't show much sympathy towards Baraka for his condition, but neither does Kuai Liang. Why Kuai Liang is still considered the more honorable brother regardless of that and his very obvious ableism, is beyond me.

Bi-Han's good traits are all too often overlooked. I don't know if it's because people don't pay attention to intros, but it's so easy to see he's not a bad person deep down. It's just the media comprehension skills of most MK fans that are seriously lacking.

[sneezypeasy]

*sigh*

Y'know, this really doesn't/shouldn't matter, but as this particular accusation keeps getting thrown at me over and over again - oh fuck it, I'm gonna take the bait this one time and set the record straight once and for all. Honestly my "appetite" in this context is truly not anyone's business (and if you don't care to hear about it this is the one warning you'll get to click away lmao) but I've reached the point where if you really wanna attack my credibility based on who you think I enjoy fantasizing about, I'm gonna throw you a bone and tell you exactly what type that is - cuz as much as I'm sick of the ad hominem attacks the Aussie in me is even more sick of watching them miss so fucking hard. If you're gonna roast me, the least you can do is hit me where it hurts, goddamn it. Get it right or go home you uncooked noodles. Capiche?

When it comes to my taste in men, my "type" is: big, strong, hairy brutes. There, I said it. Give me lumberjacks, give me cavemen, I want my Jason Momoas, I want my Ma Dong-Seoks, I want them broad shoulders and tree-trunk calves and I wanna see those muscles bulge. If a fictional character ever gets me biting my lip at the screen, it's never gonna be a fine-featured pretty boy, it's gonna be a good thick daddy who can take my wrists, pin me against a wall and [--------------------------------‐---sustained bleep sound effect---------------------------------]

1:38-1:51 🤣

Personality wise, I'm a basic bitch who has approximately zero defenses for the "jerk with a heart of gold" stereotype. Gets me every time, without fail. The smooth-talking playboy who flirts with everyone and who could bed anyone he wanted, but who only lets you see him at his deepest, dearest, most vulnerable moments? Sorry, am I supposed to not fall for that shit or something? Well frankly I don't understand how and I'm not ashamed to admit it. If he happens to be built like a fortress on top of that? Yeah, I'm done. Have me bathed and brought to your tent, sir, please and thank you.

I admit, it's rare that a character with the physique I like also has that heartbreaker personality I'm a sucker for. Guys in fiction are usually strong and mean or they make up for their lighter frames with silver tongues and barbed promises - rarely do writers create a character who's stacked with both brains and brawn, so to speak. Makes sense though, as while irl people can max out any combination of stats that they put effort towards - in fiction a character who's too good at too many different attributes can come across unbalanced or Gary Stu-ish and will fail to resonate with audiences unless the writer really knows what they're doing.

That being said, there really isn't any character in ATLA who fits my type - either of them, actually. There are some bit characters like Chit Sang who get close in terms of physical build - but Chit Sang has very gaunt, angular facial features that I'm really not a fan of and tbh, while I get that I can't expect all my big buff boys to also be masters of wit and cunning and charm, being dumber than a box of rocks does seal it for me, sorry. In terms of personality, I guess the closest character would be Jet, and he's cool and all but yeah, the whole "would go as far as killing kids" thing makes him a bit of a hard sell for me too. (And yes, it's worth questioning the writers' choices to create him with those flaws to begin with but look, that's a discussion for another day 😂)

All this to say, if you wanna tease me about coveting fictional characters and allowing thirst to cloud my judgment - COME AT ME BOYS. But not with Zuko, for fuck's sake. The character that makes sneezy.exe blue-screen ain't him. It's actually the late great Carthaginian General Hannibal Barca, the man the myth the legend may he Rest in Peace if anyone's seriously wondering. Look, I do like the scar, and the awkwardness is endearing - he's definitely not ugly or unappealing by any means so please don't misunderstand, I'm not trying to bash him or nothin' - but if I'm being brutally honest, he's not my type! Not physically, not even emotionally. If I ship Zutara, it's because aspects of the ship appeal to me that are unrelated to my personal opinion of Zuko as an object of fantasy, which if you must know (and now you do, congratulations, you're welcome), the kind of boy I do fantasise about when I'm in the mood for that sort of thing could literally and figuratively sweep Zuko off his feet - and then sit on him. In either order.

P.S. While we're on this topic, the character I personally relate to most heavily is not Katara either btw. It's Toph. If you're going to accuse me of bias, questioning my views on Toph would make the most sense for that reason. But really, it's hardly my fault that she's basically the most perfect flawless irreproachable badass in ATLA or practically all of animation as a whole. Come on now. *whistles innocently*

[cienie-isengardu]

Tomas & Liu Kang

I’m trying to put things into right perspective about Smoke, Liu Kang’s approach to Tomas and how pushed into background he was during story mode so bear with me while I’m connecting dots.

Also, to be clear, I’m not here to morally judge the characters, just to talk about the dissonance between Smoke vs Liu Kang intro dialogues and the story mode.

For one, the pre-fight dialogues imply that Tomas lost his family due to Liu Kang (Keeper of Time)’s choice: 

Smoke: "Did you intend for me to be orphaned?" Liu Kang: "Some threads must be cut to weave time’s fabric." 

and

Smoke: "I'm not sure I can forgive you." Liu Kang: "Being Keeper of Time meant making many hard choices."

When Tomas was orphaned, Kuai Liang & Bi-Han’s father adopted him and made one of Lin Kuei. If the accusation is true, then we can assume Liu Kang wanted Tomas to join Lin Kuei, as he did in the past timeline(s). So, in theory, Smoke for whatever reason was important enough for the Keeper of Time to get involved and steer events to get the wanted result. 

Which raises a question, why did Liu Kang not bother to recruit Tomas into Lin Kuei the same way he recruited Kung Lao, Raiden, Johnny Cage or Kenshi, by like, actually talking to him and taking for training? Or even why not just ask the befriended Grandmaster to take the boy (and Tomas' family) under his wings, which I think the man would do without further question.

Instead, Smoke was orphaned, taken in by Lin Kuei, adopted as son of Grandmaster and trained in magic to equalize his chances in the fight (in contrast, Bi-Han’s ice powers seems to be a natural part of him, related to specific bloodline).

Now, if Tomas was so important, if not in the greater scheme of things, then just for Liu Kang (and Kuai Liang), isn’t it weird, he is so sidelined and omitted by Fire Lord in the story mode?

Again, not judging characters, solely pointing out this choice of storyline, as this is especially visible during collecting the champions for the tournament arc.

In Chapter One, when the test was over and Liu Kang came to Kung Lao and Raiden to explain things, he specifically called only Bi-Han (the current Grandmaster) and Kuai Liang (Bi-Han’s blood-brother)

while Tomas was totally omitted and stayed behind with the rest unnamed Lin Kuei warriors.

Which, visually speaking, is weird, as just before that scene we could see Smoke walking alongside his adoptive brothers (with Bi-Han leading the group, Tomas and Kuai Liang walking a bit behind their leader, but before the unnamed warriors);

In the next chapter, again, only Bi-Han and Kuai Liang assisted Fire Lord in his quest to recruit Johnny Cage and Kenshi. Again, both Lin Kuei were addressed by their birth names, instead of codenames

while there is no information why Tomas was left behind. He likely was entrusted with escorting Kung Lao and Raiden to Shaolin Monks, yet the lack of proper mention emphasizes the pushing into the background.

We didn't learn officially Smoke's status as adopted brother of Kuai Liang and Bi-Han until Sub-Zero's chapter (#8). Unless I miss something, the first person on screen to actually address Smoke by his birth name was surprisingly Bi-Han.

Which makes even weirder the lack of including of Tomas from Liu Kang, as the Fire Lord and Smoke stayed allies through the story mode and intro dialogues (with some resentment on Tomas' side for death of his family) while the relationship between Bi-Han and Tomas was much more complicated to begin with.

We could make an argument that Liu Kang didn't want to antagonize Bi-Han by including adopted Tomas too much, however:

A) Bi-Han has never denied Tomas right to consider himself one of Grandmaster's sons - seen especially in Sub-Zero's speech pattern, as Sub-Zero always says just "Father", the same as Tomas and Kuai Liang, never putting emphasis on "my" as a reminder Smoke is adopted. The real conflict is not about whether Tomas is his and Kuai Liang's brother or not, but about him being a true Lin Kuei. What is also worth to keep in mind, any tension between brothers happened only in privacy (here and during the mission), never around Liu Kang.

(A similar thing can be noticed in intro dialogues. In Smoke vs Sub-Zero, Bi-Han specifically says "Because your blood is not Lin Kuei" however in Liu Kang vs Sub-Zero, when Fire Lord claims brothers (plural version!) miss him, Bi-Han doesn't correct his opponent about Tomas not being one. He instead says "Then they shouldn't have disobeyed my commands.")

B) Liu Kang did not show Bi-Han any special respect, especially not the kind of respect and friendship offered to Sindel and her husband, Jerrod. And yes, Fire Lord mentioned Bi-Han before Kuai Liang, and addressed him during the meeting before the mission (while the Sub-Zero's younger brothers - subordinates - stood together in silence)

but that basically it? Bi-Han didn't seem to be favored in any special way, I don't think he even was addressed as Grandmaster by Fire Lord at any moment in story mode.

Which is why I personally don't see why Liu Kang would omit Tomas solely to not hurt Bi-Han's ego or to not antagonize the man further - especially since Bi-Han himself didn't push the matter in any specific - openly - way nor didn't deny Tomas the right to consider himself one of Grandmaster's sons in the first place.

Frankly, as we don't see how Lin Kuei were informed about the upcoming meeting, we should ask, did Liu Kang call Bi-Han and specifically Smoke and Scorpion for the mission, or was that choice made solely by Sub-Zero? Because Lin Kuei for sure must have much more experienced warriors that Tomas (and Kuai Liang for that matter) but also sending on dangerous mission the Grandmaster AND the second* in line of succession seems impractical from the perspective of clan' inner safety.

*second and third, if Tomas was allowed at all to be the heir. Considering how neither Smoke nor Scorpion even for a moment considered that option and how Sektor & Cyrax would choose Bi-Han's corruption of the clan before accepting Kuai Liang as a new leader, the inner clan politics may not be so simple.

During the Lin Kuei mission (Sub-Zero's Band of Brothers Chapter) and during Bi-Han's betrayal (Scorpion's Civil War Chapter), the three brothers didn't address each other by codenames and as much as the situation allowed, freely interacted with each other.

However once Bi-Han is removed from the story mode, Smoke is even more pushed into the background. When asked, he will answer and make some (one?) observation however he barely interacted with other characters, mainly sticking to his brother. The most important exception is the scene when the heroes were wondering what to do after the big revelation and Tomas on his own talked about Lin Kuei and Bi-Han.

The story mode at that time was focused on other characters (like Mileena & Shang Tsung) so understandably, Lin Kuei brothers were put aside however even then Scorpion played a vital part, as it was Kuai Liang making the plan of attack, when Liu Kang wasn't around, while Tomas for most part was just there.

Again, no moral judging of characters just a mere observation how Tomas interacted the most freely with his brothers while was omitted by Liu Kang - and like, never(?) addressed by him in story mode, either by name or codename, even if the intro dialogues strongly imply Liu Kang was the one pushing Tomas into Lin Kuei in the first place.

Which makes an interesting contrast to Bi-Han & Smoke’s relationship but also shows how without intro dialogues, the relationship between Tomas and Liu Kang seems… non existing? I mean, even at the end of story mode, Liu Kang mentions Bi-Han

and his brother Kuai Liang building a new clan,

yet there is literally no mention of Tomas and his participation in the creation of Shirai Ryu and training its members (something confirmed in Scorpion and Smoke's endings).

Which only add to the weird feeling of alienating Tomas in story mode, not by Bi-Han but Liu Kang of all possible people?

[child0feden]

WEST COAST

chuck schuldiner x reader

- general dating headcanons for chuck!

the chuck brainrot came back for me! he was so insanely handsome, such a gorgeous man <3

- view my metal masterlist here

reading music recommendations: zero tolerance by death - west coast by lana del rey

- i can see chuck being an absolutely huge fan of pretty traditional and cliche dates!

✩ like drive in movies, little diner dates and similar stuff like that? yeah, he just loves them…

- when it comes to drive in movie dates, his favourite movies to go and watch are horror movies! he will open his arms and let you cuddle up into him, gently resting his chin on your head, his eyes glued to the screen as he quietly mumbles some silly jokes about the characters that make you softly laugh into his leather jacket

“ god, what a moron… i mean, why would you run that way? idiot… look, i bet you ten bucks he’s gonna trip on that rock ” ( spoiler alert: the character does trip on the rock, causing you and chuck to share a quiet laugh, not wanting to disturb other people at the drive in )

✩ diner dates are just very relaxed and laidback dates for him, he likes to go and grab a milkshake with you after a long recording session! not only does the cold milkshake soothe his slightly strained throat but he gets to give you the juicy fresh cherry that was throned atop the cream in his milkshake

- it is not that he does not like cherries himself, he probably does, it is just that he knows you really like them so why would he not give an extra one to his gorgeous partner?

✩ if it is the opposite and you do not like cherries at all, he will snag yours from atop the soft whipped cream and pull it from the stem with his teeth before shooting you a cheeky wink

- i feel like he is really good with his fingers… like, really super good…

✩ i mainly mean this in a sexual way, chuck would probably be an absolute god when it comes to fingering you and just generally teasing you

- but i also just mean it in a general way, chuck is probably beyond amazing when it comes to comforting you by softly stroking your hair and gently cupping your face in his calloused hands

✩ speaking of comfort, he is just such a loving and caring boyfriend when it comes to you being upset and simply needing some loving

- he will cradle your face in his hands, stroking your cheeks with his warm fingers and gently wipe your salty tears away with his thumbs, speaking oh so quietly to you as he tries to calm your breathing

“ you’re okay, baby… what’s up, hm? what’s happened? ” ( his voice is impossibly soft when he is talking to you and he lets you talk if you need to whilst listening intently )

✩ chuck is probably super on top of your anniversaries and really just about any other dates that are of any importance to you! it is not even that he needs to try and remember them, it is more like anything related to you gets permanently stamped in his memory

- your favourite type of chocolate? he knows it by heart! the face wash you usually use? sure, he can grab you some from the store and you do not need to tell him the brand! your favourite candle scent? he sees a pretty candle with that scent in a store and buys it without a second thought

✩ i feel like he would just be so insanely sweet and domestic

- he actually really enjoys cooking with you, washing some vegetables before you cut them up as he holds your hips from behind, slowly swaying slightly and pressing soft kisses to the side of your head after setting the oven to preheat

✩ and chuck can absolutely cook! do not ask me why i think this, i just do…

- he never really told you he could, it just so happened that you fell pretty sick one morning and could not cook so he went to make some breakfast for you whilst letting you rest in bed

✩ you thought it would turn out to be some half burnt or maybe at least half decent toast but oh no… this man came back to the room with a fully cooked breakfast with bacon, sausage, hash brown and so on! even freshly squeezed orange juice and you have absolutely no idea where he got oranges from and he will not tell you that he snagged them from the neighbours garden…

- when you ask him why he never told you he could cook so well he is probably so cheeky and smug, simply throwing a little wink your way and shooting you a nerdy fingergun motion before climbing back into bed with you and snagging a soft piece of bacon from the porcelain plate

“ well, you never asked… but you know now! the great chuck schuldiner can cook like a fuckin’ god ” ( okay, maybe he gets a bit of an ego after revealing it to you )

✩ chuck really likes going to little bars with you! not really to drink though, he just likes sit comfortably with you and see the local talent, if there are any good bands playing, he really likes supporting small unknown bands, especially when they are teenagers!

- he really loves seeing people that remind him of himself when he was a teenager and you guys kind of become something like older sibling figures to a lot of the young bands he discovers, him giving them advice of how they should go about things and you making sure they are always well dressed and fed

✩ often times, you guys are not even that much older than most of the teenagers but the dynamic just works

- when it comes to marriage, i can see chuck being kind of split on how exactly he really feels about it!

✩ on one hand, he really does not think you need a piece of paper to have a “ legitimate ” love and he thinks weddings are just a bit of a sham

- on another hand, he definitely would not mind giving you a beautiful diamond ring and getting to call you his spouse to everyone he meets…

✩ but i cannot ever see you guys having a really traditional wedding, most likely you would get eloped! but he would still give you a pretty hefty chunk of money and tell you to buy yourself a pretty dress to wear if you want to

- the only witnesses are his band mates and your shared group of friends, they brought some kind of terrible store bought cupcakes with them to share between you guys as well as a truly terrible disposable camera that would end up photographing you and chuck feeding each other pieces of a cupcake with your elbows entangled whilst giggling as your ring glistens under the soft light

✩ chuck really loves spoiling you whenever he can, he adores taking you shopping or taking you to get your nails done, reading a random magazine in a seat by your side as you chat with your nail tech

- one time, you got the death logo painted across your nails and it really nearly made him combust, he was obsessed with them! he absolutely took you to see his band mates that same day and showed them just how sweet they were

“ look at that! i didn’t even know you could do that, i thought you could just get colours and shit… ” ( getting his tip colour on your nails too? woah now, who the hell said that? not me, i promise hehe )

✩ chuck is another guy who i could see just absolutely loving photo booths! he drags you into every single one he ever sees

- he just really likes having a bunch of pictures with and of you, for when he is on tour and you cannot come and just for general memories

✩ when the two of you are inside of one, he will sit you comfortably on his knee and wrap his arms around you whilst placing a sloppy yet sweet kiss to your cheek as you laugh

- he definitely keeps one of the photo strips in his wallet, always pulling it out and admiring the features of your face when he misses you, holding the photo in his hand when on call with you, matching your voice the face in the photo, imaging the smile you probably have on your face <3

[cellarspider]

26/30 PIE to the face

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We return to a movie that is going to linguistically hurt me again, Prometheus. You get to read a ramble about PIE. You’re welcome.

Content warning for MORE OF ME. I cannot be stopped.

So. Imagine you have found a sleeping alien. You believe that they were on a mission to destroy humanity as a disappointment. What do you do? Not waking them up is certainly an option. But what if you do? You’re going to want to not disappoint them.

One could, for example, study the records still maintained within the alien ship. Learn about their culture. Get more than one guy to learn their language, particularly since this translator you’ve got seems to be a little gung-ho on things like “seeing [his] parents dead.” That’s a bit of a warning sign.

And hey, something horrible happened on this ship, probably right before or right after this alien was put into hibernation. There’s a lot of dead bodies on the ship. Having a trauma counselor or three there would be a good call. People trained in de-escalation, definitely. Give you a chance to talk the alien down, and help them process stuff in what’s hopefully a culturally appropriate manner, given your xenological research before waking them up.

You’ll probably want to make sure to take the “kill humanity” button away from them too, that would be a good idea. And, preferably, not have exploded the head of one of their colleagues.

Am I describing a process that would take years? Yes. It should. This is the most important thing humanity’s ever done.

It’s been two days since the Prometheus landed.

As stated before, my faith in fictional humanity was not high in this scene.

David wakes the Engineer up. Rather than any of the measures I described above, the Engineer is met with David, Weyland, some security guys, Doctor Franenstein the head-exploder, and Shaw.

It took most of the humans a good hour or so to stop looking like death after waking up after a two year nap, and this Engineer’s been under for a thousand times longer. The poor bugger is visibly hung over and feeling sick, almost falling over on Weyland.

Shaw starts demanding David ask where they’re from, what’s in the ship’s cargo, why was it made for humans, all in English as Weyland tries to talk over her. They are speaking a language that only took its modern form 1600 years after the last events on this ship took place. The Engineer has zero clue what anyone’s saying.

The Engineer remains silent, and visibly disturbed by how Wayland orders his security guy to hit Shaw, which just makes the still unintelligible questions louder and less coherent.

And then David starts speaking to them.

There was a short dialog between them filmed, but in the final cut, the Engineer doesn’t speak at all.

The final cut also removes Weyland’s pitch for why he should have immortality–he created life in David. David is something more perfect than human. Therefore Weyland is a god, and gods never die.

This is, as you can imagine, not convincing. It would’ve made Weyland slightly more explicable as a character, but the movie hasn’t even done that for its lead, so of course it doesn’t for Old Man Capitalism.

In the full release, David only says a few sentences. To quote Anil Biltoo, who wrote the translation:

The line that David speaks to the Engineer (which is from a longer sequence that didn’t make the final edit) is as follows: /ida hmanəm aɪ kja namṛtuh zdɛ:taha/…/ghʷɪvah-pjorn-ɪttham sas da:tṛ kredah/ A serviceable translation into English is: ‘This man is here because he does not want to die. He believes you can give him more life’.

This is–okay. In the theater, I did not know precisely what this language was. But I was making a fair imitation of the Engineer's expression in response to this, because I was pretty sure it was PIE.

Proto-Indo-European, that is. A massive swath of world languages are all traceable back to one source, though we have no records of it. Linguistic reconstruction of how they evolved from earlier roots allows us to infer a language that must have existed, and we call that the Proto-Indo-European language. PIE for short. And this is a big ol’ slice of PIE right here. 

And I had a whole thing in early drafts of this post. I’d convinced myself over the years that my inexperience with PIE had led me astray in the theater. I’d convinced myself this was a PIE conlang. Meaning, I thought this was a language created for this movie that sounds like a cousin to PIE. That’s still howlingly weird, for reasons I’ll get into. But then I saw this featurette:

[Video description: A behind the scenes featurette for Prometheus entitled “Language Of The Gods”. It interviews Anil Biltoo on his work for the movie, in which he explains the concept of a proto-language, of PIE in specific, and what he did for the movie.]

It’s PIE. It’s a different reconstruction of PIE than the current standard, but it’s PIE.

And I feel vindicated, because that’s what I heard in the theater. David opened his mouth and out came PIE. 

I can actually read a few words in the excerpt. I could hear them in the theater. The word /hmanəm/ is clearly meant to be a root word of “man”, which standard reconstructions indicate is the descendent of PIE *ǵʰmṓ. /Namṛtuh/ is very clearly from PIE *ne-mért, “not-die”, because anything that looks like “mort” in an indo-european language probably has something to do with death. And “/kredah/” is close to PIE *ḱréddʰh₁eti, hence Latin “crēdit”, hence modern italian “créde”, “he believes”. 

PIE is just like that, sometimes. Some roots are unrecognizable, others are instantly identifiable. I’ll include my attempt at a gloss (a brief technical explanation of the meaning and grammar) at the end of the post.

The implication is that the Engineers taught their language to humans. That was Proto-Indo-European, which then spread from there. I almost started laughing in the theater at this. 

In the real world, we know a few things about where PIE came from. PIE was probably spoken by people north of the Black Sea, at least five thousand years ago. This guy who’s just woken up with a hibernation hangover went to sleep three thousand years after that. 

But, y’know what? Fine. Let’s say it’s a liturgical language. David’s done the equivalent of walking up to somebody and speaking to them in church Latin. Weird, but not impossible that it could be understood. Or maybe they’re just so damn long-lived and linguistically conservative that it’s more like talking to somebody in an old-timey news broadcaster voice. Still weird! But comprehensible.

But you know what we can’t possibly link back to PIE? Egyptian, Sumerian, Akkadian, Hawaiian, or the Mayan languages, most of the other ancient cultures the movie says the Engineers definitely contacted. Did all those come from the same ur-language? We don’t know. We can’t know, because our reconstruction methods are ineffective past a certain point. But if they did, then their root language had to have existed before the Bering Strait closed off the Americas from Asia, making any common ancestor at least twice as old as PIE. The movie’s implication is that it was PIE. The language of the gods is PIE. PIEngineer.

Apparently everybody who the Engineers talked to just forgot the language of the gods, save for the linguistic descendants of some nomads on the Black Sea Steppe.

And that’s before we get into the worse implications. We can’t tie East Asian languages back to PIE. Austronesian languages. American languages. African languages. Were these people just not contacted by the Engineers? Did they forget? Did they refuse to listen?

None of these are good answers! None! They’re all bad!

In Anil Biltoo’s defense, he’s an academic linguist, and, to my knowledge, not one who’s a conlanger. Ridley Scott specifically wanted to work in the oldest possible human language, and Biltoo delivered on that, based on modern scholarship. He did not make an alien language that evolved into a human language. If Scott had wanted that, David and Jesse Peterson would probably go feral for the project, but they weren’t asked. What would be the most naturalistic thing to do, if you wanted to get across the idea that humans inherited language from the Engineers?

You make a Proto-Human language. People have tried before, and others have argued their attempts are bullshit. This is one of those times that Wikipedia has a “the neutrality of this article is disputed” flag at the top of the page, because there are nerd fights everywhere on this. We don’t even know if a Proto-Human language ever existed–there could have been multiple independent origins of language–but if you’re writing fiction, sure, Proto-Human exists.

Come up with a vocabulary and grammar that could work for Proto-Human, have David speak it to the Engineer, it sounds alien to everybody, nobody gets to be the special children of the gods, and no linguistics dork in the audience will laugh at you.

They will definitely laugh at what happens next, though.

But the post is not done! Bonus linguistic nerdery below, including a sample of my constructed language and its script.

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Citations for alt-text rambles:

https://moomin.fandom.com/wiki/Stinky 

https://www.deviantart.com/pretty--kittie/art/Prometheus-Engineer-407327934 

https://www.uni-wuerzburg.de/en/news-and-events/news/detail/news/new-indo-european-language-discovered/

Edit: additional citations!

Movies in 15 Minutes review of Prometheus by @cleolinda, as retrieved from the Internet Archive. Hat tip to @kantama for identifying it!: https://web.archive.org/web/20120726203957/http://m15m.livejournal.com/23209.html

PIEngineer gloss

Alright, for the language nerds in the audience, I’ve put together a potential gloss, entirely based off of PIE roots available on Wiktionary and a shaky understanding of PIE verb construction:

/ida hmanəm aɪ kja namṛtuh zdɛ:taha/…/ghʷɪvah-pjorn-ɪttham sas da:tṛ kredah/ this.[singular neuter??] man.NOM [anaphoric demonstrative].1.NOM.MASC here not-die EMPHATIC/towards.3MASC.PRES(?)…life-many-[resultative or inchoative verb suffix? adjective of possession, accusative singular?] [genitive singular reflexive?] give.[middle 3S] believe.[stative(?) 3S] A more literal translation would therefore be “This man here does not (want to) approach death…he believes he (can be) given more life-having to himself.”

I am not good at figuring out suffix affixation for PIE verbs, so I probably missed or misinterpreted a few in there. I’m not sure how to break down /zdɛ:taha/ in particular, and /sas/ is a bit mysterious to me. Biltoo definitely created his own PIE reconstruction for this. Vowels are all shifted (ex *éy -> /aɪ/), there’s more palatal consonants (*ḱi-Ø -> /kja/, *polh₁-r̥-m -> pjorn), and other sound shifts I’m too scatterbrained to categorize right now.

PIEngineer to Tade Taadži translation

Alright. I previously mentioned that I have a conlang. I have yet to mention that it is distantly related to Prometheus, powered by the spiteful creative energy this movie engendered in me.

So it’s only fair I translate this passage into my language, write it in my script, and give a thorough gloss.

Jàà odormàà, hu sàà id aannãgu … midadjã kii jur kaas ʻus mogeso. /jɐː odoɾmɐː hu sɐː id aːnːãgu/ / … /midadjã kiː juɾ̥ kaːs ʔus mogeso/ This.VOC not-native-person.VOC, death.ALL not go.ATTR want.PRES. Forever.NOM give this.ALL 2S.VOC ACC 3S.NEAR.ponder.PRES.3P.FAR.ACC

Translation notes:

I am assuming David is speaking formally, clearly, and respectfully in this translation, even if one of the people he’s being respectful about is Weyland. Both Weyland and the Engineer are thus addressed using the Vocative case when first directly mentioned.

Due to the formality of the speech, formal style glyphs are also used: these require significant planning ahead of time, to identify ligatures, aesthetic considerations, and, ideally, to select a total number of words that works out to a multiple of six, as this is culturally the ideal number for a line of text.

Formal ligatures can cross glyph boundaries, and are read every time you encounter part of them in the left-to-right, top-to-bottom reading order. The most common ligatures are between grammatical markers, as in this text, but can extend to whole glyphs or even individual components of them. If one is feeling particularly artistic, aesthetic ligatures may also be joined between thematically similar glyphs.

Gendered pronouns are not used in this context. Politeness dictates that any third person pronouns be replaced with the equivalent of “this” or “that”, unless given express permission to use more informal terms of address. This is especially true when referring to non-native speakers, as they do not have an equivalent social role to the five (yes, five) genders of Taadži culture.

The word for “non-native person” used to indicate Weyland literally means “thing that has a spirit”.

Following my shaky PIEngineer gloss, I tweaked the verb in the first sentence: “to die” would normally be “hur hybà” (lit. “to stand at death”), but this has been changed to “hu iddà”, “go to death”, indicating that Weyland fears even getting near the idea.

The word for “forever”, “midadjã”, is derived from the word for 6^6, or 46,656. Tade Taadži uses a base six number system, because I felt like taking Jan Misali up on his heximal advocacy.

The normal word order for the language is SVO, but in dependent clauses it becomes OVS, just to make things harder for everyone, including me, who muttered “ah fuck” when I had to check my notes to remember where to put an allative and vocative in there. It’s after the verb, apparently.

The language has verbal person marking in some contexts, and I deliberately bent the second sentence into a more poetic mode so that I could show it off while retaining formal speech, referring to Weyland’s belief as if it’s a person. The glyphs ligate the person marker to the tense marker, Both to save space and for aesthetic purposes.

I had no word for “believe” when I started writing this sentence, so I grabbed a verb already associated with thinking during unmoving meditation to stand in for it, to get across the idea that “this is something he has thought about a lot”.

It’s a shame David’s being polite, because while I didn’t have a word for “believe”, I do have a word for “to believe despite evidence to the contrary”.

Bonus citations:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daemon_(computing)

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[turbulentscrawl]

Identity(V) Headcanons: Naib Subedar

yall know the drill ;) If you like how I write the characters, consider sending me a request or matchup!

I also don't really have the patience to sit on my posts for a few days and check for mistakes, so forgive my typos hahah

-Naib got into his line of work out of necessity, not desire. He has never enjoyed taking lives…but he is both very good at it and very professional about it. He’s survived so long, in part, by being good at compartmentalizing his emotions. Work is work, and life outside is not, and he’s somehow managed to separate the two without separating his mental state. Nevertheless, he’s a very different person when he’s on the job and he would prefer that his loved ones didn’t see that.

-Outside of work, Naib shares Norton’s sentiments of all life being created equal. Unlike Norton, however, he uses this as a motivation to protect people rather than concern himself with revenge. That’s not to say he won’t step in if someone is out of line, but he is primarily focused on contributing good to the world in his free time.

-That said, Naib’s moral compass has become a bit warped over the years. He does his best to be a good person, but at a certain point someone can have so much blood on them that it starts to color their vision. The opposite of rose-colored glasses, if you will. He is, however, an accurate and consistent judge of character, so he often thinks about his course-of-actions in the frame of ‘would my mother be proud of me for this?’ That helps a lot with any difficult decisions.

-Naib “gets along” with most people. Being rough around the edges as he is sometimes makes it difficult for people to tell where they stand with him, but in truth he’s very vocal when he doesn’t like someone. It generally takes someone intentionally and repeatedly antagonizing him before he starts to develop a negative opinion. Otherwise, he maintains politeness.

-He is very slow to let people in, however. Naib’s life is dangerous and fleeting, so even when he likes someone he’s hesitant to get close to them. Outside of the manor, he’s a genuine slow-burn sort. A real “we’ve known one another for years and I’ve liked you for almost as long but I wont let myself have you until it’s entirely too much to take and I initiate an explosive night of passion” sort. Inside the manor, though, I think it’s more of a “we take comfort where we can get it, and then it slowly becomes real” sort of thing.

-Used to being the man of the house, Naib has a habit of trying to speak on behalf of or otherwise handle people’s problems for them. Again, he’s a good judge of character, so he’s pretty accurate in gauging how people would want situations handled…but this can still cause tension with friends and partners who are more independent. And if you talk to him about wanting to handle something yourself? There’s a non-zero chance he’ll go behind your back and take care of it anyway.

-The best love languages for Naib are Gift Giving and Words of Affirmation! He likes receiving thoughtful gifts—specifically ones that help in his everyday life, or resolve an issue he’s having. (Even if that issue is just “I’m hungry” and you pick up some of his favorite snacks.) He also likes little trinkets that he can easily carry around to remind him of the giver when he travels. Naib also tends to give kind words the benefit of the doubt, so he accepts verbal affection without argument or doubt. Everything he does is for his loved ones, and he likes to know that he’s appreciated, loved, and missed when he’s gone. Letters are amazing too; he keeps every letter and picture he receives and treats them with as much care as possible.

-Naib could not be close with someone who has a problem with his work. He understands why they would, he himself is rather tired of it.... But he’s been doing this for too long and is in too deep to leave. He and his mother cannot afford for him to quit being a mercenary and take the time to try learning some other skill that may or may not keep food on the table as consistently. You don’t have to like his work, but it can’t be something you hound him about. If you don’t talk about it, neither will he, and you can both just pretend it doesn’t happen.

-He’s a walking garbage can. I mean it, he can and will eat anything provided to him. He has preferences of course, but after years of food insecurity and then subsequent years of service-provided meals, he’s learned to not be picky. He also never outgrew the habit of rationing and hiding food in case of emergencies, and is an avid believer in the 5-second rule because he dislikes wasting food.

-Because he eats so much--and in spite of having irregular sleep patterns—Naib always has a lot of energy. This is useful for work and matches but also shows itself in other ways…such as being a very animated conversationalist. (per the stageplay lol) It’s only obvious when he’s moderately comfortable, but Naib might legitimately be incapable of sitting still when he’s not on guard.

-He’s pretty bad at making jokes. His sense of humor came from his years in the service, surrounded by brothers-in-arms. As a result, his idea of good-natured joking is completely ragging on people. Norton is the main person in the manor who gets this, but it leaves most other people to wonder if they’re actually friends or if they hate one another.

[the-bloody-sadist]

What’s an unpopular ship that you actually really like?

I don’t think these are SUPER unpopular as ships, but because they’re from lesser-known anime (that don’t have very active fandoms at least), here are a few!

Daisuke Kanbe and Haru Kato from The Millionaire Detective: Balance Unlimited (top Kato, because Daisuke is my favorite and that means he’s going to bottom LOL)—this anime is one of my favorites and I rewatch it a lot, especially that one episode where Daisuke is just a little baby boy who gets drunk and doesn’t know how to be poor.

Also the show ships them too here’s proof:

John Watson and Friday from The Empire of Corpses—absolutely devastating (and gorgeous) movie with an after credit that ruins everything, but gods will I watch it over and over for these two. There’s just something so erotic about a man bringing his best friend’s corpse back to life as a Frankenstein-esque monster and trying to make him human again. I’ve made a post about this one before when I’d first watched it (lmao I was traumatized), but I have a big weak spot for non-verbal characters, so Friday is my favorite. I wish there was an active fandom for this so I could see ship works for them! Also, one of my favorite animation styles of all time. Everyone looks so pretty.

Fushi and The Beholder from To Your Eternity—ehehehheheheheheh this one is a popular anime but not a popular shipper fandom. LET ME DREAM, THOUGH. I drew one work for it once, I’m qualified. (Also the non-verbal character strikes again [yes I was mad when he learned to speak like a normal person eventually])

Kaname Kuran and Zero Kiryu—NOT TALKING ABOUT THEM. DO NOT MAKE FUN OF ME‼️🫵

Gareki and Yogi from Karneval—I could ship Yogi with several men in this anime but that’s just because of Miyano Mamoru magic I’m sure…anyway if you haven’t seen this one ITS VERY GOOD. Idk if it got cancelled officially or what but I hope a second season comes anyway. Still worth it, regardless!

THATS IT OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD, CLEARLY I CAN NEVER GIVE JUST ONE EXAMPLE…HOPEFULLY YOULL FIND SOME NEW WATCHES FROM THIS LITTLE LIST!

[mageofseven]

MC Talking about Trauma they Experienced (Luce, Dia, Satan, Beel & Belphie)

Edit: this has been in my drafts for a while now. I started this one day when my depression was really bad and this was actually very therapeutic to write.

However, I got super emotionally exhausted from it and sort of abandoned it and since then, I've been debating whether to finish it, delete it, or post it as is.

After some thinking, I decided to add another character or so to the post and then post it.

Please, please check the trigger warnings below and do not read anything you can't handle.

Please protect yourself and always check for trigger warnings.

Now everything below this message is what I wrote originally that night.

Stay safe and if you do still read this, thank you for your time!~

~~~~~~~~~~

I wanted to write this because it's been on my mind; I'm autistic so I tend to have zero filter and over share things, but often in a nonchalant way, like I'm telling you about a cat I saw outside and not about things I talk to my therapist about on a weekly basis.

Basically, this is a post where MC shares bad memories (whether in an upset or nonchalant way) and we see how the Boys react.

So like, angst ahead, but the kind that might hit too close to home for some people.

I'll keep it all below the cut so you don't have to read anything potentially triggering for you if don't want to.

TW: physical abuse, emotional manipulation, child abuse, alcoholism, parents with anger issues

•▪︎▪︎◇°●♡●°◇▪︎▪︎•

Lucifer:

"MC, we're not having that for dinner for the 4th night this week."

"But...what will I eat then?"

The man sighed.

"I don't know. I'll have to figure something out." He told them. "Honestly, meal planning would be a lot easier without your food sensitivities."

The human stared into space, mind seemingly far away.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow before stepping closer.

"MC? Is something wrong, Love?"

"I'm remembering the time my mom slapped me on the face at a community barbeque in front of everyone there because she wasted money on buying me a ticket for an event without any food I could eat; I ran away and hid so I could cry and hyperventilate without people judging me."

His eyes widened.

"When did this happen?"

The human shrugged.

"I dunno. A few years back." They guessed. "I didn't get to have any food at all that day because my mom was so mad at me."

Lucifer took their hand and squeezed it.

"Well, you aren't with your mother anymore." The man smiled bitterly before adding. "I suppose we could just order pizza for tomorrow's dinner."

"No peppers? No olives?" The human asked, surprised.

"No peppers, no olives." He nodded.

"No iguana eyes? No anglerfish lantern?"

"None." He promised, despite knowing Beel's disappointment at the last two toppings not being on the pizza.

MC smiled and squeeze their boyfriend's hand back.

"Thank ya, Luce~"

The man's smile became softer.

He made a mental note to ask for Barbatos' help with finding more foods his Love can eat, but for now, the demon just didn't want MC thinking back on such horrible memories.

Like always, Luce just wanted to treat his Love how they deserved and not how they've always been treated.

Diavolo:

The two were discussing the prince's relationship with his currently deep-slumbering father.

It wasn't a topic Dia liked to speak about, but as his relationship with MC deepened, he found himself confiding in her with things he used to avoid discussing.

"...so in fairness, maybe we were never going to be close, considering the circumstances."

MC looked away, tears in their eyes.

"My Queen..." Diavolo brought his hand to their cheek. "Forgive me, I didn't mean to upset you with this."

MC shook their head.

"No, its not you." They told their boyfriend. "I just...I kinda relate in a a way..."

The prince brought the human into arms before kisskng their forehead.

"I can tell you have something in mind to share; you can share it with me."

MC was quiet for a moment before nodding.

"Once when I was a kid, we had a speaker come to class to teach us about child abuse. They handed out these pamphlets and explained to us that if our parents do any of the stuff that we talked about that day then we could call a number in the pamphlet..."

The demon tightened his embrace around them, not liking where this story was headed.

"I...I remember learning that a lot of stuff my parents did to me and my siblings was bad," They continued. "So I went home and told my parents that a speaker came to school and he told me that if they keep doing bad things and mistreat me that I could call the number on the paper..."

The human's tears fell down their cheeks, followed by Dia kissing them away.

"My Queen..."

"Ya know what they said to me?" They asked rhetorically. "They said 'Do it. I dare you'. Told me those people would take me and my siblings away, put us in foster care and split us up. That I would never see them or my brother or sister or my grandparents or anyone that I loved ever again...and told me they wouldn't even care, that they could just 'make another just like me' and that I would be responsible for my siblings' and my own suffering while my parents would just be happy to get rid of me."

The prince pulled MC into a tighter embrace as they cried.

"I wanted a good relationship with my parents so badly, but how do you become close with people who tell you at such a young age that you are replaceable and a burden they didn't even want?"

"You don't." He said softly in their ear as he stroked their hair. "Your parents were miserable people who never deserved having you as their child; they made sure of that."

The man leaned back to look them in the eyes.

"My Queen...I'm sorry you went through that. Please remember that you didn't deserve it though."

MC nodded.

"I...I know. Logically anyway...but it doesn't feel true, ya know?"

"Oh MC..."

Diavolo took the rest of the day off work, regardless of any urges or reminders from Barbatos.

This man wanted so desperately to comfort his beloved and heal the hole in her heart.

Still, the man knew there was not much he could do for the latter; this was just something his Queen had to work through on their own.

That wasn't going to stop this man from showering them love and reminding them just how perfect and sweet they are to him.

Satan:

Satan had gotten into an argument with Lucifer, resulting in one of his fits of rage.

They were so rare now of days; this was essentially the oldest bringing up the wrong thing at the wrong time and pushed it too far

Causing Satan to destroy half of the living room and the two 'brothers' screaming at one another.

This went on for a while till the two men noticed the human in the corner hyperventilating.

That knocked the blonde out of his anger real quick as he raced to their side.

Lucifer allowed the argument to pause for now, considering the human's condition, and so left them be.

Eventually, MC calmed down enough and launched themself into their boyfriend's arms.

"I'm sorry..." He spoke softly into their ear. "I shouldn't have lost control like that...especially in front of you."

MC shook their head within his arms before sniffling.

"It's not you..." They mumbled. "When the crashing started...I-I just...I didn't see you...I didn't see House of Lamentation..."

"What do you mean, Kitten?" He stroked their hair before pulling back to meet their eyes.

"I...I was in my head." They explained. "It reminded me of a time when I was a kid...my dad was drunk and got angry at my little brother. I...didn't see what happened, but I heard curses and crashes and my brother begging him to stop...and I didn't save him. I didn't save him. I hid in the kitchen and sobbed with my arms over my head, begging for him to stop in my mind but not being able move or even speak..."

"Kitten..." Satan hugged them tightly to his chest again. "You're not there; you're here with me and you're safe."

"But my brother--"

"You would have just gotten hurt too." He told them. "You were a child just trying to to survive. It's not your fault."

"But--"

"It's not your fault." He repeated.

This time, the human just closed their eyes and hung their head.

Satan picked them up and carried the human to their room; the...scare, I guess you could call it, had really tired his partner out.

He laid his Kitten on their bed and kissed their forehead.

Satan vowed to never himself lose control in front of them ever again.

Even if this time it had less to do with what he did and more about something they experienced long ago, the wrath demon needed to keep himself in check so he never brought such bad memories to his Kitten's head again.

Beel & Belphie:

The human went on a walk with the twins and, as per usual, Beel made a stop at Madam Screams to get a few dozen pastries.

Beel carried all of the bags of sweets himself and, no matter how often MC saw him carry so much food and never drop any of it, it still amazed the human.

"Dang, that's even more than yesterday..." Belphie commented. "Did you already spend all of your grimm this month?"

"Almost." The gluttony shrugged, still not dropping a single bag.

Suddenly, MC's steps slowed till they were frozen in place.

"-C? MC?" Belphie called to them.

The human slowly raised their gaze up at the men.

"You okay, Muffin?" Beel asked, concern evident on his face.

MC nodded.

"I was remembering one of the fights my parents had when I was a little kid." They explained calmly. "My dad spent over a $1,000 at the bar in a week 'cause he kept buying his friends drinks. Mama told him that he can't keep doing that because they were barely able to put food on the table as things were; Dad yelled at her for telling him what to do and Mom yelled back that she hopes he ends up dead in a ditch somewhere--what?"

The human was genuinely confused by the two demons, who stared at her with a mix of shock and pity.

Belphie shook his head.

"Let's just get home, butthead."

And with that, both twins wrapped an arm around them protectively

Causing Beel to drop two of his bags.

Still, the tallest demon never looked back as he and his brother took their human home, a place where hopefully better memories will come to their mind.

[iguessitsjustme]

Love Sea Ep 3 Thoughts

I just had the kind of day that makes you fall back in love with life a little bit. So what better time to watch Love Sea than right now? I will say I have been warned that certain parts of this episode will make me angry. So odds are, if you like the show, you won’t like my thoughts. But I’ll go in with an open mind. Episode 2 was fine. Right? Right. Anyway, just in case, if you click the read more and you don’t like what I say…that’s on you. You were warned. So let’s do this thing. Episode 3 time.

This time the movie I watched before this show didn’t have literally the best sound mixing I’ve ever heard in my entire life. So I think my ears are safe this time. It won’t be good but at least I’m not going from the best to…this.

IQIYI translate texts challenge 2k24. I said it last time and I’ll say it again. I am very skilled. I have many talents. Reading Thai is not one of them. What’s the point of paying for this streaming service if they’re only gonna half ass the subs? Anyway. Give the translators a raise and hire more of them. Or face my wrath in the form of one tiny little post under a read more on the internet that you will never see. But you should feel my scorn. Feel it!

Rak better keep his glasses. I swear if Rak loses his glasses….

It is raining in the show so I feel the need to tell y’all that I bought two umbrellas today! They were both on clearance. Isn’t that great? My collection grows.

Oh also IQIYI translate the fucking spoken words too challenge??? Girl what is going on.

I have no context for this line. Zero. Why are they talking about her boobs? What is happening in the rest of the conversation. Cause I also can’t speak Thai. I wish I could. That language is simply not in my wheelhouse.

I could be watching the Stray Kid’s cover of Sherlock for the millionth time but instead I’m listening to a Thai phone call that means nothing to me. All I know is she mentioned her boobs.

Noisy drunk street people go home challenge. Go home and stop conversatin right outside my apartment. Do that elsewhere. You have now left the bar cause it’s closed. My apartment is not open for business so I don’t know why you’re loitering outside it. Time to blast some kpop real quick. That typically works. Oh they left before I got to play any music. They must have a sixth sense.

Thank god I got this conversation fully subbed. The fuck is up with his dad? Actually. You know what? I don’t want to know. Whatever it is, it’s bad. And I don’t want that. I don’t trust MAME to do trauma actually. Well. I trust MAME will do trauma but I don’t trust her to do it well.

I STILL CAN’T READ THAI.

I did not gain that skill in the last 15 minutes. Why are they doing this to me specifically?

I am enjoying this song a whole lot.

Why are we getting flashbacks in every episode? MAME is a better writer than this. Why is she relying so heavily on flashbacks? I’m so confused.

Rak, do not go to a secondary location with that man. Dear Mut, what the fuck? He has said no. That is a complete sentence. And believe it or not, he does not need to explain it to you. He was being generous by telling you why he said no. But you are going to force him to go somewhere else? Have you considered I hate you and will kick you right in the balls?

The music is trying to convince me this is romantic but honestly I’m just confused.

THEY DIDN’T EVEN WEAR HELMETS. And then my soul was launched from my body straight into the sun and I feel nothing anymore.

Oh to be stargazing on a beach while laying next to a hot boy and having deep conversations about life. Oh if only that were me. Hey real quick, anyone want to go stargazing with me? I’ve never been stargazing and I think I should do it. 

I’ve only been watching this episode for 23 minutes. I thought it was almost over. This shit is dragging. The directing in this show needs significant work. There is not enough movement on screen in far too many scenes. Even when We Are had two characters (Tan and Fang) just standing and talking, it wasn’t difficult to watch because they were both constantly moving. Well, mostly Tan. But Fang did too. There was something for the eye to catch. Something to watch. With Love Sea, they have Rak and Mut just stand and talk, or sit and talk, or lay down and talk, and there is not nearly enough movement. They need to be doing something. I am moving more just sitting on my ass on my couch (shoveling cake in my mouth) while I watch than these two are doing on screen and that is a directorial problem. Imagine working with an established actor pair who are known partially for their chemistry together and just…having them lay there. I was prepared to go into this show mad at it for the typical MAME reasons but honestly, I’m mostly mad that the show elements are bad. The writing is not up to MAME’s usual standard and the directing is ass. The music is par for the course and I’m more objective about it this week at least.

FINALLY. Some movement. God that took forever.

It must be nice to be able to read Thai and know what the fuck is being said.

People stop reading over Rak’s shoulder. Let him have some privacy. The fuck?

If someone forcibly made me cover up like that on a hot day, I would pull a gun outta my ass and shoot them. It is HOT. I am SWEATY. Let me BREATHE.

MUT. NO DOES ME NO. BUT NOT WHEN YOU’RE TRYING TO OVERRIDE SOMEONE’S AUTONOMY. LET RAK’S TITS BREATHE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. LET THEM BREATHE.

Save Mook. Seriously. Save her.

Horny boys.

This scene would have far more emotional impact if we had any more time with these characters. Literally we started the episode with Rak refusing to go somewhere with Mut and being forced to go. And now he’s willing to stay? Doesn’t he believe love is a figment of the imagination? Did that fucking change? Did we see that change? Was it in one of the texts I couldn’t read?

I’m not…angry at this show. I mean Mut is never gonna be my favorite and neither is Rak, but MAME has had far worse cough cough PrapaiSky cough cough This show’s problem is actually the worst problem a show can have: it’s boring. I’m bored. The writing is lazy, the directing is abysmal, and honestly the sound mixing thinks it’s doing something and utterly failing. Those are the only three things I feel I’m knowledgeable enough to comment on but I’m sure the rest isn’t great either. I’m upset that I can’t even be mad at the characters. Cause it’s all so boring. When did I go back in time to get a BL that was so poorly written as to be a joke? It’s 2024. I refuse to believe this is what they put together. For all its faults, LITA was at least entertaining. At least it didn’t ruin my lovely day. I am gonna go get ready for bed now because unfortunately, I have to work in the morning. Oh to have a summer off. Oh to go to the sea and stargaze at the beach. I can’t believe this show managed to make even that boring.

[autumnoakes]

granted, i DID do a lot more gaming towards the end of the year, BUT i sae someone else do it and i also want to do it.

2024 in review: video games I played edition (regardless if I beat them or not)

Pokemon Violet: apparently this was my most played game in january and i just remembered that it was because of the DLC. the hidden treasures of area zero was... okay. i liked the teal mask part a lot. it was goofy at times, but the story and pacing was solid. i did NOT like the indigo disk part much, aside from the story. it's a lot of tedious grinding having to complete tasks and get enough BP for them to release more pokemon into each quarter. i DID like returning to unova, though. black/white is probably my favourite pokemon game. my feelings on scarlet/violet as a whole are rather mixed. the DLC didn't improve on the issues i had with the base game, and nintendo pushed this DLC so hard. i'm glad they slowed down with releasing pokemon games because the scale is getting too big for their expected development period. i'm happy they're taking their time with legends Z-A

Pokemon Black/White: if you couldn't already tell, i started 2024 off with a huge pokemon phase. i think i officially started this game in 2023, but played at least half of it in january. it's so good. i love the story and the pacing and the MUSIC oh my god the music. the elite four kicked my ass i'm ngl so i never got to the end of the main story. hopefully some day.

Pokemon X/Y: honestly only started playing this because of the new legends game announcement and it didn't last long. it was okay. i think i got to the second gym and that's about as far as i got. for some reason a france-themed pokemon region is really funny to me.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom: another one i started in 2023, but hey i never said i had to play it for the first time in 2024. mixed feelings about this one too, but for different reasons than scavio. i did really enjoy totk, but i think between this and how much i played botw (which i started playing again recently but i've talked about it so much i don't think i'll include it here), it just became more of the same. maybe i'll revisit it later in the year and see how it hits then. i will say though, it's really fun to worldbuild using the lore from this game.

Hades: BELOVED!!!!! beloved beloved beloved. i love this game so much. the art style is so good, zagreus is a delight, the gameplay is satisfying, you get the idea. i honestly played very little else once hades 2 went into early access and i couldn't play it for a few months, so i finished the main story last year (after having the game for like. 2 years). speaking of....

Hades 2: MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's very familiar if you've played hades, but a lot is different. the scale of the story itself is much bigger than in the first game, and the narrative is a lot more complex. melinoë is also a delight, and i'm a huge fan of her gameplay. there's not really a good side or a bad side, but you're led to believe you're fighting for the good side because that's what melinoë believes. she's such a fascinating character, and the fact that this game is still only early access blows my mind. i played nothing else from july to september. 11/10 game, one of my favourites.

Resident Evil 4 (2023): hi hello i'm annoying about this game. i didn't expect to play this game this year, much less enjoy it as much as i did, AND YET. i really liked how the characters were written in this game. i haven't played the original, but i feel more for them in the remake than i do in what i have seen of the original. it's kinda funny because the plot of the game is really serious like, threat of an apocalypse, main character infected with dangerous parasite, themes surrounding trauma and change, etc. but it also features World's Most Yeetable Man (according to residents of this one village in spain).

The Legend of Zelda: Echoes of Wisdom: GOD I LOVED THIS GAME!!!!! it was both familiar and brand new, with the return of classic zelda enemies like peahats and redeads paired with protagonist zelda. and zelda is SUCH a delight here as well. i loved her gameplay and how it kind of forced you to get creative and had the subtle tones of necromancy at times. the story isn't anything particularly groundbreaking, but i enjoyed it nonetheless. it was surreal to see a game that wasn't a part of the botw era but was made after the fact and how the botw era impacted the design and UI. i strongly believe they started work on this before totk was released.

Resident Evil 2 (2019): i had a phase and now this franchise is a special interest so i played a lot of these games towards the end of the year. anyways re2 beloved. the replayability is wild, since there are significant story differences depending on who you choose to play as and in which order. it's also just a lot of fun imo. my aunt knows when i'm playing this game because it is actually pretty scary and i'm not. quiet when i get startled akdnskdjdj. the story isn't too complex but it also centres around a city being controlled by a corporation and features two protagonists who have no clue what's going on which resulted in this anti-capitalism narrative which is a little bit funny. it makes it almost satirical considering it's a zombie apocalypse game

Dark Souls Remastered: hoooooooly shit i suck at this game lmao

Resident Evil 3 (2020): i honestly expected to enjoy this one more than i did. i really was having a good time up until the hospital sequence, and then it kinda went downhill for me. one good thing i will say though is that despite seeming like it should happen after re2, it actually starts before and ends after re2, and happens in the same place. you just have a different protagonist and focus, but in both games, there's this continuity that make it into this sort of non-linear story spanning across both games. i watched a chronological order cutscene movie of both games and it was one of the best things i've ever seen.

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard: ngl i hate that this game is good because i can't get very far in it due to Scary Man With Axe chasing me around :( so like.... mixed feelings but only because this game is fucking terrifying and i haven't gotten very far in it at all. despite that, i think it was a solid franchise reboot and the new plot they have going is really fascinating. shaking mia violently i need to know more about her. capcom. capcom please put her in the next game pLEASE DON'T FRIDGE HER AGAIN PLE-

Resident Evil Village: i expected to enjoy the first two sections and not like the last half of the game but it turned out to kind of be the opposite. the first half of this game is more classic survival horror, between being pursued by an angry 10 foot tall lady whose kids you just murdered and whatever the hell that giant demon baby was, whereas the second half is more action oriented. i REALLY liked the factory part, and even chris' part (surprisingly, since i do not like chris much and this game is why). the ending always destroys me though like... ethan was such a different protagonist to others in the franchise (the closest to him i would say is claire, but even then, chris taught her a lot of what she knows and she's got more skills than the average civilian). i'm gonna miss him in the next game, especially if they continue with either mia's story or rose's story. i haven't played the DLC yet and i'm on the fence about getting it, though.

Resident Evil Revelations 2: LAST RE GAME I PROMISE. it's extremely underrated tbh. i'm only like maybe 1/5 of the way through, but i love how you go between past (claire and moira) and present (barry and natalia) and how the story unfolds through that switching perspective. they probably won't, but i hope capcom remakes the revelations games.

Cult of the Lamb: honestly didn't get very far into this one, but it's morbidly adorable. 100/10, i love my little cult leader lamb.

The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt: GOOD GAME. AMAZING GAME. i'm not too far into this one either, but hooooooooly fuck. it's so good. geralt is such a Guy and i'm obsessed with how he solves problems. he really just gives the aura of guy who is trying his best but people hate him anyways. ciri is so blorboable like she's jusg blorbo shaped. i love her so much (yes i may have started playing tw3 because of tw4 announcement, what about it?)

Baldur's Gate 3: i keep getting stuck but i love this game. i understand how it won goty now. i feel like it would be so confusing if you haven't played d&d irl though. i also like how they integrated the whole "here is your character. they are Your Character, and not a predetermined protagonist or one meant for you to project onto." you get to imagine their backstory and shape their personality through decisions. i was going to play a very serious, lawful paladin character but like an hour and a half in they broke their oath and then went off the shits so they went from the lawful good character i envisioned to a chaotic neutral force of nature. i love them so much.

Elden Ring: i'm just bad at soulslikes i think. this game is gorgeous though, i'm just not far enough into the story to make a solid judgement on the game itself. soulslikes in general have a steep learning curve and are notoriously difficult. i keep dying 😔

[mythica0]

Come-down

🎂:The loud house

🍫: all siblings(implied/mentioned)

🧁:Luanne

Summary: Luanne is feeling a little blue and insecure, and her trusty family help her smile again.

A/N: (btw title is pronounced like comedy but with down.)inspired by “no laughing matter”. Hurt/comfort because I EAAATTT IT. I LOVE hurt/comfort and cheer up tkls!! Also she’s my fav character so I go FERAL for angst especially when it ends well. (Also becuase she’s my favorite a lot of these are gonna include her as ler or lee because again, I LOVE HER)

Come-down

“Good morning, Luna” Luanne spoke. It was early in the morning, around 8:00. Luanne had been up for a while, just sitting in her bed, and now Luna was finally awake.

“Huh? Oh, morning sis! How are you this morning?”

“I’m fine.” Luanne lied, looking at her sister. Luna stretched for a moment before heading out towards the kitchen for breakfast, then looked back.

“You comin’?”

“Yeah, I’ll be right there.”

“Okay! See you then!”

At first, Luna didn’t see anything wrong, but then she stalled for a moment. ‘Wait a second- no breakfast pun? That’s so odd..’

—————

“Hello Luanne.”

“Hi Lucy! What’s up?”

“I was hoping you could help me. I wish to find a word with double meaning, and I know you are excellent at that, considering how much you love puns.”

“Hmm… what’s the context?”

“I need something that means to wait in darkness, but I was hoping for a poetic connotation of something else. Right now I have ‘Like an untouched dinner, stuck in the fridge I’m left to…’

“You could use ‘stew’ as in to stew in darkness. But that’s the best I got right now, sorry.”

‘Really? Only one?’ Lucy thought, curiously.

“Thank you, it works perfectly.”

“No problem, Lucy!” Luanne gave a (fake) smile before moving on.

Later that day, the siblings met in Lori and Lenny’s room for a meeting. Everyone was there- except for Luanne.

“We know why we’re here right? something is up with Luanne.” Lincoln announced.

Lisa nodded. “Correct. She has made exactly zero puns or practical jokes all day. This is extremely statistically unlikely.”

“I’d say. I asked her for help with a pun and she gave me one. Not like, fifteen like I was expecting.”

Luna made a noise of agreement. “Yeah man! When I asked her if she was joining me for breakfast this morning, she didn’t even make a breakfast pun! Something is definitely up. We need to talk to her.”

Lisa once again agreed. “Absolutely. The last time this happened she almost gave up comedy entirely. We need to get our Luanne back.”

————

“Luanne, may I speak with you?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah, sure Lisa, need a test subject?”

“Not exactly. Let me just cut to the chase- what is bothering you?”

Luanne smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “What do you mean? Nothings bothering me! What gave you that idea?”

“You haven’t made a single joke all day. This is not like you, and the only other time this has ever happened, you were extremely upset.”

The fake smile dropped. “Okay, yeah, I admit it. Im just feeling a little blue today.”

“Yes, but why?”

Luanne sighed. “I had a bad dream last night. I was on stage, but the crowd kept booing, and throwing tomatoes at me. And then all of you guys came out of the crowd, whispering to me that I was worthless, that I was never going to be funny and that my dreams were not achievable. So now I’m felling a bit… insecure.. about my jokes.”

Out in the hall, the whole family breathed in, and some of them got misty eyed. Lucy whispered. “What did we implant in her head? Sigh, poor Luanne never deserved that.”

Lisa exhaled sympathetically. “Ahh, a nightmare. Nightmares are your brains way of expressing insecurities and fears. But, you must be aware that dreams cannot hurt you. It wasn’t real, Luanne.”

“Yeah, I know, but I’m having a hard time feeling like myself…”

“Don’t worry, we have a way to help with that.”

“Really?- Wait.. we?”

Everyone in the hall piled into her room.

“Yup. Everyone came together because we were worried about you.”

Luanne teared up a bit. “Aww, really? I love you guys.. but… what are you gonna do?”

“Just lay back and you’ll find out!” Lincoln smiled at her.

Luanne complied and laid back on her bed. “Okaaaaahahahay! Hehehey!”

Lisa began to scribble Luanne’s sides.

“We think it might be helpful to bring some laughter to you, through one of your favorite activities- tickling!”

“Ihihi dohoho lihihike tihihihicklihihing yohohou guhuhuys! Eheehaha!”

All of them started gently tickling Luanne, not all at once, but taking turns.

“We know. And sometimes you use it to help us laugh or cheer up after a long day..” Lincoln began

“And we thought that maybe we should do the same.” Lucy finished.

“Ahahahaww yohohou guhuhuys! I lohohove yohohou soho muhuhuch!”

“We love you too!” The whole family chorused in reply.

“Hmm… I have an idea!” Lynn exclaimed, turning to her siblings, “what if we tell Luanne jokes! Might help her get back into the flow of things!”

There was a mutter of agreement and ‘good idea’ s, and then- the lineup of dad jokes began.

“Hey Luanne, did you hear about the time that a medieval knight asked me to clean his armor?”

“Noho!”

“It was great! I’ve always wanted a night in, shining armor.”

“Pfftahahaha! Thahat wahahas greheheat!”

“What about this one.. did you hear about the graveyard that opened up on the other side of town?”

“Noho, whyhyhy?”

“People are just dying to get in.”

“Hahaha, thahahats vehehery youhohou, luhuhucy.”

“I know.”

“Knock knock!”

“Whohos thehere!”

“Boo!”

“Bohohoo whohoho?”

“Don’t cry! It’s just a joke!”

“I had a joke about an airplane, but It’d just go over your head”

“Hehehahahaha! Ihi knohohow thahat ohohone! Ihi ahahlso hahave aha johohoke abohohout pahahper, buhut ihits teheheahahrahable! Hahaha!”

“There’s our jokester!”

They stopped and let Luanne breathe for a moment.

“You feeling better?”

“Yeah! Guess this comed-Ian was feeling a little come-down! Haha, get it?

And laughter filled the room once more

———THE END————————————————

[mermaidsirennikita]

ok thank you good to know! because i'm seeing people act in genuine disbelief why other people are upset show francesca isn't that into john on top of just general confusion why they're upset about any changes to francesca's story because the bridgerton books aren't good. i've only real tdai so i can't speak for the quality of the whole series but i keep hearing whww is the best one. also the idea the show has elevated the books is silly to me, even if they aren't good books the show also isn't good?

As someone who has critiqued the Bton books a lot (I would only recommend two out of eight, personally) from what I've seen a lot of the people who say the books are bad haven't actually READ them lol. They've read out of context screenshots. I fucking KNOW they haven't read When He Was Wicked when they're out there calling Michael a sexual predator, lmao.

When He Was Wicked is the best book in the series, and anyone who's read multiple books in series (this isn't a dig at you by the way, I have zero issues with people going "I don't wanna read 'em, doesn't sound like they're for me", nobody HAS to read these books, I just think it looks very... unintellectual to critique things you haven't consumed--and part of that comes with maturity, I used to do things like that and still have to catch myself doing it at times, but damn some of these people are big ages and acting like they can talk about books they haven't read in an informed capacity) would know that it's also VERY different from the others.

The average Bridgerton book, imo, is very romcom-ish. Several of them rely heavily on the Ton or how a character relates to high society. They are chatty, fast-paced, often pull in other members of the family, and tend more towards those romcom vibes than historical accuracy. (None of these things are why I don't love most of the books; I think that a lot of them have structural and character development issues that have absolutely nothing to do with the tone of the books.) WHWW is a book that begins with a character being in big turmoil because he loves not only his cousin's wife, but his best friend's wife, and knows he will NEVER do anything about it. John dies. Then we have a massive grief tailspin for both Michael and Francesca, a SIZABLE time jump (4 or 6 years) and a return that begins as them rebuilding a friendship before he realizes she wants to remarry, she realizes she wants to fuck him, they do in fact have sex on the floor, and this sort of situationship begins. It's more sexual than a lot of the other Bton books (still not that sexual but more sexual lol) and it's a lot more... emotionally conflicted. It also in large part takes place away from the Ton and the family, though Colin (who is much better in the books, it's true) does have a "You go find my sister and get her" moment which I personally found hilarious. Show!Colin wouldn't dream of being like "GOT GET HER MAN!!!" to some guy who is very clearly just gonna like. Bang Colin's sister. A lot.

Like, I'm not saying WHWW is in my top romance novels. It definitely isn't. But it is imo a solid romance novel and the best one I've read by JQ. However, that's just my opinion. What isn't my opinion is that Fran and John were in love, for example. That's a fact. People who read the book know that, but we've got a lot of people who haven't read the book saying otherwise.

But yeah lol, to me regardless of what you think of the books... This idea that the show empirically elevated them is ridiculous to me. The books have many flaws. The show also chose to keep things like Daphne raping Simon; the show added in things like a Black unwed mother having her secret outed and being vilified by the "heroine" of the series, with zero consequences for said heroine; the show adds in things like "one of them loved one of US" and doesn't truly colorblind cast, but also doesn't want to deal with the implications of that (where is the British Empire in the Bridgerton show, then? How does India relate to that? Is Anthony Bridgerton going on an Indian babymoon just like... okay....? I wouldn't ask about any of this if the show just colorblind cast everyone, but it didn't, so); despite all of that, the show also chose to write a homophobic world.

And you can love that show! You really can. But acting as if the books are All Problems and the show All Perfect is kind of just... completely off balance and binary, to me. They're very separate entities at this point with (often) very separate problems. And as is the case with most adaptations, there are things the show did better and there are things the books did better.

I really wish that people could learn how to say "I love this thing, and I love that this thing did That Thing. I think That Thing is important. But that doesn't mean it's perfect, and this thing can still be critiqued".

Half my favorite books are old as balls and have problematic content. WHWW has problematic content. I can say that I appreciate what is good about those books without casting aside the things that aren't good.

I will say this as one last point about WHWW--anecdotally speaking, most of the romance readers I talk to actually don't like the Bton books that much. That's not to dog out the books, that's me reporting their tastes to say--the books they do like are either TVWLM, WHWW, or both. So I do think that people often say "WHWW is the best" because it is the "If you don't like Bridgerton, this is the Bridgerton book you will like" for romance readers, and has been since before the show began. That book's audience is often non Bridgerton-liking romance readers.

[blackjackkent]

Rakha and the others trail behind as Lae'zel makes a beeline for the githyanki officer and the enormous dragon flanking him.

"Rider! My time is short!" she bursts out. "Lead me to--"

"Shhhh-sh-shh..." The kith'rak puts up a hand, clicks his tongue sharply. "Such a familiar tone," he growls curtly. "Were I not merciful, I would slice the skin clean from your meat. Yet you are not bleeding - for I am *nothing* if not merciful. Your name, child!"

Rakha can see how Lae'zel is struck by these words as if by a whip. She goes completely still, ramrod straight, eyes widening. Rakha herself feels a surge of anger on the other woman's behalf, anger the beast in her mind immediately clings onto. How dare he--

Images flash through her - of this officer's head severed from his body and fed into his red dragon's gullet. She sets her jaw, pushes the thoughts back and keeps silent through a force of tremendous will.

Nod to Laezel. Go ahead.

(A/N: We get a specifically [HALF-ORC] option here to insist on speaking on Lae'zel's behalf. I can think of some types of characters who would demand to take the lead here, but neither Hector nor Rakha are the type to claim it. Hector because he was a good dude who trusted his friends and Rakha because she has zero confidence that she knows better about the right path through any given conversation.)

"Lae'zel," Lae'zel says crisply, her eyes staring past the officer's left shoulder.

The man looks her over thoughtfully, then nods. "Lae'zel," he echoes curtly. "Proud. Regal, even. You will call me Jhe'stil Kith'rak."

The githyanki words mean nothing to Rakha, but Lae'zel clearly recognizes them and their implication; her head dips deferentially. All of the dominant confidence which she has brought to their battles thus far seems for a moment lost; she is subordinate to this man, instantly and entirely.

"Voss. Knight Supreme," she says respectfully. "The queen's silver. The queen's sword."

"I am who you say," Voss answers coolly. "A ghaik vessel has fallen from the sky, Lae'zel. Thieves aboard have taken a weapon most precious. It is polyhedric in shape, and inscribed with the sacred runes of our people."

It is perhaps a good thing that he is focused on Lae'zel, because Rakha's eyebrows shoot up. She realizes what he is talking about half a moment before the tadpole connection burns suddenly in her brain.

Narrator: You feel Shadowheart's anxiety. The weapon that Voss seeks is the same one the Absolute's followers are hunting. It's the artifact that she carries. Her mind focuses - the giths' suspicion cannot be aroused. They cannot discover that the weapon they seek is right within their grasp.

Well. This is an interesting development.

The Absolutists' hunt for the artifact made sense enough - a weapon that prevented their god from speaking would need to be destroyed. But the gith, it seems, are searching for a more personal reason - Voss's words suggest that the artifact itself is gith in origin.

This makes some sense, as Rakha's brain chews through the available information. Lae'zel has told her that her people have fought illithids for eons, and that the cleansing they seek at the nearby creche is designed to purge a tadpole infection. It is not surprising, then, that a weapon of gith design might also interfere with this cult of the Absolute, since it operates with the use of modified mind flayer parasites.

Voss is still speaking. "Take word to your creche," he instructs Lae'zel firmly. "You are to join our search."

And Lae'zel, whom Rakha has never seen flinch from anything, hesitates.

"Speak up, child!" Voss commands. "Affirm your mandate."

(A/N: TBH Rakha's instinct here is actually to just hand over the artifact. She thinks that the worms will stop being an issue because obviously the zaith'isk is going to work, and if it's a gith artifact why shouldn't it go back to the gith? Gesture of good faith and all that.

Surprisingly, if you do this, Lae'zel gets SUPER pissed and yells at you (and then yells again after the fight), and I'm honestly not entirely sure why? And then Voss just assumes you were the thief in the first place and tells Baretha to kill you anyway. I straight-up can't figure out how to rationalize Lae'zel being so angry, because she doesn't think Voss is a traitor until later in the conversation, and once you get to the creche she gets mad if you DON'T turn over the artifact to W'wargaz.

However, we have another option which still works for Rakha's thought process so we'll just stick with that rather than turn my brain into a pretzel trying to make the other one work.)

Rakha can feel Lae'zel's sudden nervousness through the tadpole connection, an uncertainty that is very unlike her. What is she waiting for? She has said from the very beginning that their best chance of safety was to reach out to her people, to inform them of their plight and obtain their help. Why does she wait?

Mouth a silent command to Lae'zel: 'Truth.'

Lae'zel straightens sharply. "My mandate, Jhe'stil Kith'rak," she says crisply, "is to locate this creche. I was infected aboard a ghaik ship and need to be purified. Your mandate is to aid me!"

Rakha waits for the kith'rak's expected agreement, for him to direct them to the creche and the salvation that awaits there. But he does not move. His eyes narrow and he peers at Lae'zel with sudden attentive interest - and dismay. "Purified?" he says disdainfully. "Soon your skin will go grey and your blood will run silver. You will shed your skin to become ghaik. Only in death are the infected cleansed."

Lae'zel stiffens. Her eyes widen so far that Rakha can see the whites in them.

"Shit," she hears Wyll mutter under his breath.

"Baretha!" The kith'rak lifts a hand, directing his underling forward. His eyes don't leave Lae'zel; he seems to be memorizing her face, her bearing, everything about her. "See that her skull is split and the tadpole crushed! Then examine her corpse. I will take word to the Undying Queen - our search continues."

He pivots sharply, backpedaling as the other soldiers come forward. As he does, his eyes cross Rakha's line of sight and lock there for a moment, and a chill shoots through her, mixed with a flare of rage from the beast.

He is lying.

Narrator: A current of deception carries Voss's words. Wherever he flies - it is not to Vlaakith.

Her mind whirls. This doesn't make sense. The kith'rak has heard Lae'zel's request and denied the purification that she claims is standard procedure - and wants them dead instead. He says he travels to the queen and goes elsewhere. Why?

"Wait--" she starts to snap, but it is cut off into a cry of pain as Baretha's sword sinks into her arm. And then she has no further time to think of anything as the beast insists on revenge.

(A/N: And then I struggled for like an hour to complete this fight without cheesing it, and then I gave up and cheesed it. XD )

----

The githyanki are perhaps the fiercest enemies Rakha has yet fought in the time she has memory of. They move in lockstep, completely in sync, attacking so rapidly that it is hard to keep track of. But even they are no match for Rakha's mad, wild magic that bit by bit tears their regimented battle apart.

Baretha is the last to fall, shredded apart by a cloud of daggers summoned from Rakha's palms, and Rakha's mind slowly clears as she stands over the mutilated corpse and breathes in the scent of its blood.

Emptiness follows the blood-rage, and a distinct note of fear. Now what?

She looks towards Lae'zel. Her gith companion is vibrating with rage and disbelief; her skin is flushed a dark olive and her eyes are narrowed almost to slits.

"Dammit all!" she roars, lashing out with a sharp kick against the head of one of the fallen officers. "A kith'rak demanded my head! He'd deny me a cure!"

She takes a sharp few steps back and forth in agitated pacing. "Bah," She mutters harshly, taking a grip on herself with brutal discipline and coming to a halt dead still. "This is a distraction. The kith'rak deserves the whole of my scorn. How *dare* he speak my queen's name! How *dare* he dishonor her child!"

Rakha listens silently, waiting for the flow of words to stop before speaking.

Lae'zel is furious - but beneath the anger Rakha thinks she detects a hint of something else. Fear. Puzzlement. This has not gone as Lae'zel expected and she is afraid. There is more going on here than Rakha is able to understand, except that Lae'zel - her companion, her... friend - is more rattled than Rakha has ever seen her.

(A/N: I'm 90% sure this dialog has been updated since I played through this with Hector. There are a few more dialog options all expressing more clearly than I recall before that Lae'zel believes Voss is a traitor to Vlaakith because he denied the SOP of purification. In the particular state of things between Rakha and Lae'zel, however, I find one of them particularly interesting. >:) )

She thinks for a moment, and remembers a moment from the previous night with Wyll on the beach. There had been confusion, awkwardness between them, and he reached out a hand and rested it on her arm and held it there for just a moment. Soothing. Comforting.

Lae'zel needs comforting now.

She tilts her head pensively, then reaches out towards Lae'zel's arm cautiously.

Reach out to comfort her.

"SHKA'KETH!" Lae'zel roars. She bursts backwards away from Rakha, knocking the offered touch aside as if deflecting an enemy weapon. The tension that has sat between them for weeks now suddenly explodes, and Rakha realizes too late that she has seen the gesture as mocking given the abrupt ending of their physical relationship.

"I will remove the parasite," Lae'zel goes on, snarling like a wounded animal. "I will see the kith'rak dead and present his corpse to Vlaaktih herself!" She rips her greatsword from its sheathe and turns the point towards Rakha's throat in a quick, spasmodic movement. "Show me pity again and I will present *your* corpse instead!"

KILL, roars the beast in Rakha's head and for a moment she feels her control slip. Were Lae'zel to make another movement, perhaps the beast would take over after all, and Rakha would find her hands around her friend's throat and everything over between them in one great fountain of blood and pain.

But neither of them moves. The two of them - all four of them - are still as statues amid the corpses around them. Rakha is dimly conscious that Wyll has a hand on his sword hilt and an eldritch blast held in the opposite palm, ready to strike - at who she doesn't know.

Lae'zel's eyes search Rakha's, and in that gaze Rakha sees a depth of pain and fear in the other woman that she had not known existed until this moment. She does not understand it, not entirely - except that somehow it is partially her fault. Partially her, and partially this kith'rak who has turned his back on the foundations of Lae'zel's life.

She says nothing, but nods slowly in acknowledgment. And equally slowly, the point of Lae'zel's sword dips, until it falls back to her side.

"A creche is near. That much is certain," she mutters. "We follow the path forward and seek signs of githyanki settlers. No one - not even the ignoble Jhe'stil Kith'rak, will keep me from my purification."