#(she & nightmare have been on my mind lately. Just in part bc im still a bit frustrated with how the fanbase treats them)
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Something which I think is kind of under-discussed regarding the Princess is how lonely she is, esp in contrast to you (the player). From the start of the game, you're never alone. You've got the Narrator - despite how questionable his company is - and the Voice of the Hero, then slowly all of your other voices. She doesn't have that. We see in Princess and the Dragon, every time a new loop starts she's completely alone with only the thought that this is what she deserves. You're the only thing she has.
Shifty asks "Why wouldn't I be kind to you? You're the only thing I know which isn't me." And we see in the game - with some exceptions, like the Witch - the Princess' goal come chapter 2 is always to have your company. Sometimes it's to subjugate you, like the Tower, and sometimes it's for help escaping, but she's almost always seeking your companionship in some way.
But you've got your voices, and the Narrator. You never really needed her, did you? I'm thinking about PATD again, where you can spend the whole chapter bonding with her only to immediately turn on her the second you get your body back ("Good to be back, boys"). In the final cabin at the end of the game, the Heart Princess can mention the whole conflict boils down to whether Shifty (and by extension, the Princess herself) "should" get to exist. If you kill the Heart Princess, you've still got your voices. There's no ending where she lives on alone. I don't think she'd even WANT an ending like that.
She just makes me very sad. You're the only thing she knows, and in some routes you're just. Relentlessly cruel to her.
#slay the princess#stp#kind of what prompted this was thinking about Apotheosis#(she & nightmare have been on my mind lately. Just in part bc im still a bit frustrated with how the fanbase treats them)#and like. If you don't swear fealty to Tower. There's no happy ending for her#(I'd argue even if you do that's not really happy for either of you)#You either kill Fury or she tears herself apart trying to make you understand her#Apotheosis spends her last moments in almost every ending with her either apologizing to you or realizing she was wrong#and in the ending where you almost help her escape she says 'you're the only thing which has ever shown me grace'#the only thing she knows and the only thing which has shown her kindness#you tried to kill her at the start but in the end you helped her reach her goal#i don't know. Rotating her in my mind.#sorry if this is a mess my brain is pudding right now
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Hey guys this is kind of part of my book that I'm trying to write tell me what you guys think
Warnings: mentions of death and k!lling urself and that's about it
Word count: 930
hope you guys like it
In my veins
Chapter 1
“Why can’t you just be like a normal girl this is not feminine” said my mom “What is wrong with hoodies and sweatpants” “ there just not feminine you need to be more feminine or your not going to get a husband” omg this women “ im only 16 I cant marry anyone till im 18” “ so start looking for guys you never go out anymore after what happened” “ omg mom can you stop bring him up “
Texting your best friend
I'm so done with her she keeps bringing him up.
Omg what happened this time.
She was telling me how I need to be more feminine like, be for real .
Ya im sorry im not there i will be back in like two weeks.
AHHH that's too long.
It's not my fault we have to go to a different state because of my dad.
Ughhh wtv be safe and i love you. Love you too.
In your room…
Why cant she just stop bringing him up like that was 6 months ago. And I don't ever go out because I know I might see him and I never wanna see him again. We were like two magnets you put us together and we never wanna be separated. We were young and we still are young but there are sum things that should never be like me and him. Ya i still miss him but i just wanna forget him my birthday is in 1 week and i still don't even wanna celebrate it bc that's when we got together.
I just cant with this anymore i need my bsf.
<You start to get ready for bed and right as you are about to go get into the shower you mom calls for you out in the kitchen.>
I'm coming hold on_ you yell your mom and as you walk out of your room you see her crying_
<you ask her what wrong and she tells you to sit down>
I'm so sorry Aphrodite
but your friend Iris was in a car crash with her dad and the car went in the river they didn't make it. As your mom told you this you You couldn't believe it it was like a nightmare that you just couldn't wake up from you didn't know how to react you just broke down crying so sad you just thought you lost it and thought to yourself what do I do now my best friend just died and things have been rough lately even with her here and now without her what am I supposed to do all I can think about is just crawling into a whole and just staying there forever I just don't know what to do it's just this is just too much I don't know how to deal with this I don't know how to live without my best friend I don't know how to do this without her I don't know how I just don't.
Chapter 2
2 days go bye since you found out your best friend died…..
Haven't came out of my room and 2 days I haven't ate anything I'm leaving I've done is just lay in my bed curled up in a little ball what am I supposed to do if you're not listening in four days all I can think about is what if I was there what if just what if all I can think about I can't believe this is happening to me my birthday I don't even want to think about my birthday anymore all I want is for my best friend back I keep getting these agonizing thoughts of what if I just ended all What if I start drinking again by stars smoking me and what if I just OD but if I just kill myself what if I just do that so that I don't have to suffer all this pain again what have I just do that so that I don't want to have to feel like this what if I just want if just can't deal with this anymore this is all too much I just don't know what to do I'm just falling into a depression again These thoughts just keep coming to my mind
You start to clean your room and you start to write letters and grab as many pills as you can and run to your room hoping that your mom doesn't see you you say good night and that you love her you Take the first 20 pills that you could find and drink half the glass of water And then you take the rest you finished your letters you clean your room you made your bed now all you have to do is wait
You wake up in the hospital a burn in my throat my mom sitting in the hospital chair crying You think to yourself what did I do wrong this was supposed to work Why didn't it I'm supposed to be with her right now not in a stupid Hospital you start crying and your mom looks up from her hands she's basically jumps out of the chair and captures you in a hug saying Thank You Lord thank you thank you so much you just start crying even harder unable to control your tears and tell your mom you're sorry I said please don't ever scare me ever ever scare me like that again lucky I walked in your room to bring you your clothes cuz you forgot them you were seizing.
(this was just a quick writing and its not proofread)
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Becoming a Family With Him, Part 3 // Shuichi, Hikaru, Rhion, Luke, Eisuke
so this came out, as further celebration for the anni. VERY GOOD, much more appreciated than the prior story set lol that one was kind of boring but i get it
they made the kids for all the... kid-less ones, and the eisuke one that used to be VIP-exclusive is now here for everyone to buy (rip those ppl who gacha for it)
my rambling behind the cut (spoilers!!)
shuichi // as ud expect, shuichi has a literal hime ass looking girl (kikyo) for a daughter. she’s only 6, but is pretty calm and ladylike. She even calls her parents with –sama so... ok luckily shuichi does not strip down all the way in the presence of her daughter and only takes off his suit coat. thanks dad
anyway since shuichi has a break coming up, he wants to have a family trip how nice. but then the dang girl wants to go over to see eisuke WHAT when soryu exists and lives a block away? unrelatable, im closing the app anyway eisuke is her first love, which wtf he’s like 20 yrs older than u. even worse, mc says she’s been in love since she was like 3.
shuichi is reconsidering the benefits of democracy in his mind but eventually relents. but then they’re still following the fucc-days rule they set years ago. well, as he says in the story, RULES ARE RULES
blah blah i don’t want to go over everything bc then it’ll be boring reading the story when it comes out in engl right? also im tired bc it’s 1 am and i just want to play toontown in bed but nothing really bad happens. they are a v cute family bc shuichi is a pleasant and mature dad. kikyo and mc even do a little surprise for him at the end and it is very sweet. i feel like out of all the families, this is the most ideal
mad hatter // so they have twin sons named Rui and Kai. Rui is the childlike one that resembles Rhion in personality, Kai is the more mature one that resembles Al. man i forget that boy’s name but u get me i know they only can use stock bgs but it’s killing me that these dang kids get to sleep in what looks like separate king sized beds.
even though rhion is now a father of two, he still acts like... 10. i mean he still horni but it makes me feel weird
later it’s revealed that Ota teaches them both as an art tutor bc they both showed an interest in art. this is cute bc ota is bad with kids in this universe LOL
the ending on this one was weird cuz the kids didn’t show up in the entirety of the last ep bc it was about WORK. so uh... interesting
hikaru // so their son is named akari. haha get it because it means light. like how hikaru also means light. can mc name her kids unrelated to their father or is that against the Geneva convention
this kid actually acts like an actual little boy. like what hikaru would’ve probably turned into if not for the whole sad backstory. the story starts with akari just bringing a dog randomly home one day. he actually saved the dog (it is very cute bc he did not want the dog to cry), and then after a talk they decide to keep the dog as long as akari knows the responsibility of taking care of an animal.
so next day, the bidders come over to their house and everyone’s like woaw a dog. lol they come into their house as guests and eisuke and mamo still demand for beverages, they all suck
akari names the dog... “Light” (Raito) and i want out of this nightmare. Naturally bc Light is an abandoned dog it’s still kind of bad with interacting with things. But then Light suddenly be giving the ( ╹ਊ╹) to soryu bc remember, animals love him. everyone clowns on soryu for being an unintentional dog whisperer and then akari is like “soryu san pls make me ur apprentice” and he gives some advice like approaching it slowly, and talking to it from the front instead of back.
blah blah there’s a situation where Light goes YEET after a Doberman gets all angry and then hides bc then another dog is scaring it. hikaru swoops in to the save the day as the Real Dog Whisperer. ok it’s cute when hikaru actually gets to look cool for once LOL
luke // luke is cute on the bc “pre-story” scene he’s actually pretty open to the idea of having kids; he actually goes “well imo we should think abt it pretty soon, but i wanted to hear ur opinion on it” but then he gets horni. and then he’s like “our kids are going to have your collarbones. awesomeee im looking forward to that” ....ok
ok cut to the actual story and they’re in Japan. Luke’s kid looks... strange versus the others. why are his eyes so big? omg voltage his eyes arent going to be saucers just cuz he half white also the kid’s name is Yuri (Or Urey). They couldn’t think of any other Brit-styled names? Like Harry? Henry? William? Wilfred? hey stan be my princess btw he’s pretty cute, though he gives serious “timid kid that gets bullied in the children’s movie” vibes. He calls Luke “daddy” and mc “mammy/mommy”.
so luke talks about his relationship w/ soryu and eisuke and then yuri is like “i want friends like that” wow cute but also find less ethically-complicated friends
so luke lets yuri meet a young patient of his (haru) so they can be friends. they get along so it’s good. haru gets in critical condition later so luke zooms outta there to do the operation.
LOL but at the end yuri is like, “i want to make more friends. (...) can i go to the bidder’s room from now on?” this boy works fast
And then he’s like “Eisuke-san... please be my friend.” HIS POWER. even eisuke was like :O so then eisuke orders a whole bunch of food and books up to the penthouse. But then yuri’s like “...i like eisuke’s eyes” and everyone’s like oh man that’s gonna be his fetish
Baba: why have u started to have an interest in eyes Yuri: I read it from one of daddy’s medical books Hikaru: wtf u can read that at 4??? (...) Soryu: wat Yuri: um... i want soryu to be my friend too Yuri: bc soryu’s eyes are also powerfully cool...
eisuke // ok this gets an extended ramble bc the more annoying the story the longer i must complain
so you might be thinking, “oh so this is gonna be a flashback in some in media res styled story with your 2 kids, u know in the style of the others” and well, no you just go straight to white screen into the flashback, back when eito was smaller and thus a little more cute. well it’s not really false advertising bc they did say “reminisce” in the description. but i wanted to see eito be a good big brother for a moment! or... less good? man i wanted to see kaito go waaaah like a baby idk i wanted to see him exist
so back to the story they cut to small eito. even as a smaller punk he does fight with his dad a little, just w/ a more narrow vocabulary to work with. tho at this point he’s still pretty sweet so clearly eisuke clowning him day and night was a negative effect on his development. (doesn’t treat his child like a child) (child grows up to a punk that doesn’t respect him) (surprised pikachu) being the son of a billionaire means that this child has to go study at a very young age and listen to MOZART. no child of eisuke ichinomiya will be listening to degenerate bops like lee taemin’s criminal next day they all go to the very fancy school that eito will be attending. eisuke does a speech, but then eito is all like “why is papa over there all the time” in reference to how all the other parents in attendance are having fun with their children, but eisuke is busy talking to other people for business and connections etc. etc. mc kind of has a hard time trying to explain it to eito bc... it’s honestly poor parenting... eiji shows up after arriving late, and he’s like “gramps is gonna be with ya today! instead of papa” which is cute but then she’s like psst thanks for coming and im like oh... so grandpa just didn’t randomly come to the open house for fun he’s just gonna be surrogate dad while real dad is busy... aw... and then at the end eito’s like FUC THIS KINDERGARTEN. eisuke is like “(smh) don’t yell in public. (despite everything) you are still the eldest son of the Ichinomiya family”
and so afterwards it’s clear that eito does not want anything to do with this school. he just sits in the classroom until mc is there to pick him up instead of playing in the courtyard or w/e, wanting nothing to do with the other kids.
so later there’s a hiking trip for the students and both of their parents, and mc asks eisuke if he’ll be available for it. eisuke is like, “i have a business trip that day, so I’ll have to adjust my schedule” and he’s been very busy in the opening of a new business or w/e. mc tells him to not do so much for something like that and that it’s ok if she goes alone with eito on the trip.
it’s the day of the trip, and mc goes alone with eito. she notes that a lot of dads did indeed come along for the trip. she apologizes to eito and says that she did talk to eisuke about the trip before, but he’s simply busy for this day. and im like... but girl, you were the one who told him not to change his schedule for the trip. yes a trip may seem less important than business ventures, but don’t make it sound like you weren’t the one who stopped him. lol. idk why im pressed abt this single line of dialogue bc later she does realize she fucced up there well eito is just like w/e about it and has pretty much accepted that sort of thing
anyway eito goes missing later and one of the kids said that he told eito that his dad (eisuke) didn’t come bc his dad thinks that his work is more important than his son. so eito got mad and ran off somewhere
and then mc finally gets the lightbulb moment that eito... wants to see his dad!! he ran off to go try to see him somehow??? !! wow so sweet
it’s raining like a mf but then in her search for eito eisuke randomly pops out of nowhere. He’s like “ho i did not remember saying that i wasn’t coming” and she’s like “im sorrryyy” and both me and him are like “just find the dang kid”
ok yea they find eito, he starts being a good student, and u start to see where he starts being antagonistic towards his dad LOL etc. etc. lol this story annoyed me so i don’t feel like doing the rest of the play by play orz
anyway thanks for reading my garbage LOL
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asks :))
what i have learned today is that y’all wanna get fucked by some monsters...
What does nostos mean? What language is it in? 🤔 also I of course loved it, mind blown as usual queen
it’s ancient greek! it means homecoming, the idea of a triumphant return home for the hero after a long journey. i found it through looking at the root of nostalgia. in this fic of course it’s kind of a grim tongue in cheek play on it. the reader’s coming back to the mountains, but she’s running away after a bad breakup, and the welcome she gets is... shall we say less than ideal haha
Just read nostos-
First of all as a person who reads monster shit- hell ya. Mhm. That’s some good shit right there. That was DELICIOUS horror. It actually had me a bit nervous and afraid to read what was gonna happen next 😳
Secondly- omg I wanna know what happened next (at the end) 👀 know what I mean??? 😼
ANYWAY AS ALWAYS you never disappoint and your writing is fantastic (if/when you write horror yandere stuff again I’ll be there- frothing at the mouth. A+++++ work ILY💖)
you want me to write the monster porn, just say it bby ghfjdkshgfjkd but ty
Omfg that fic was so good!
Did the readers mom know about monster kuroo?? Or was she just worried because of the previous murder? And did Kuroo somehow manipulate reader into coming back to the forest or was it just a big coincidence? (👁👄👁 there's no such thing as a coincidence)
Looking forward to your future work <3
ty nonnie!! i didn’t have the right space for it, but after kohsuke was ripped apart and eaten kuroo stayed by the reader’s side until late in the night, only disappearing when he heard the reader’s parents/search party approaching. they found her lying in pools of blood (and scattered half eaten body parts), shaking and unresponsive – they knew no animal could’ve done something like that. so they knew something lurked in those woods, but considering the reader had repressed the memories, her mom couldn’t just come out and say it <33
You are an AMAZING horror writer!!!
The uneasiness I got from the conversations with the mom is just *chefs kiss*
A+++++
ahh thank you!! horror is such a hard genre to write because i’m never sure if the suspense and everything’s gonna hit right haha
I read Nostos before going to sleep last night and at the time I was like “sure hope this doesn’t give me nightmares” and thankfully it didn’t lol. But I think I’m willing to take that chance again because it’s so GOOD and I think I’m just going to have to relive it – @ohno-otome
fhdjgbfhjkdfn i’m glad it didn’t give you nightmares bby!! but i also appreciate that haha, i’m an absolute wimp with scary movies and stuff but i just can’t stop watching them haha
I just wanna say that I was listening to "You're a psychotic villain playlist" on youtube while reading Kuroo's oneshot and I can't explain the emotions I felt, but I'd let Kuroo do things to me asdfghjkl – @itishebihime-samaforyou
ooh nice! sometimes the right playlist makes things doubly as fun haha
OH MY GOD!?!?! Nostos was soooo GOOD?!?!? Like it was so creepy (but in a good way), and scary and suspenseful!! And the ending!?!? Omggg honestly one my fav fics from you!! You did my mans Kuroo justice 🥺💖💕
TYYYYYYY i was genuinely concerned i was gonna scare everybody off haha
Ah! The new fic! Chiefs kiss! Magnificent! Bravo!🧚♀️✨🧞♀️🦖🦭🌹💫
tysm nonnie!!! <33
i’m pretty sure i’m in the same/similar timezone as you? and i do be staying up late to be one of the first to read your fics (i usually stay up late anyways). so imagine my surprise when i see you post in the afternoon. in conclusion, whether you post to align with your european and american readers’ timezone, my gmt+10 arse will still be one of the first to read your fics. also nostos sjdufigyyjf i have to admit, i recently just found out about monster fucking and nostos scratched the itch😫 i feel bad for kohsuke though
bby i always post at like 2-4 in the morning please get some sleep!! the fics will be there in the morning lmao. i kinda low key forget about my aussie/gmt+10 followers because i think there’s like... 3 of you haha
Honestly if i could give u a dollar everytime i got off to your fics, you'd probably be rich by now
lmao the idea that people find my fics hot enough to get off to still blows my mind lol
your newest kuroo fic was so SO good!! its totally okay if you dont want to answer this so you can keep things ambiguous but is monster kuroo planning on killing the reader after he's...done with them
thank you, bby!! but no, monster kuroo isn’t gonna eat her – he’s had plenty of chances to do that if that’s what he wanted, but he has other plans for the poor reader
RHI, I WANT TO STATE FOR THE RECORD THAT I AM OKAY WITH MORE MONSTER FUCKING IN THE FUTURE. i also want to say im not a monster fucker, but that just feels like a lie at this point. okay, now that that's off my chest, i love it. the mystery, the connections of kuroo to a cat. kuroo's probably gonna go and batter around his prey once they're under his grip like my cat does. hopefully the reader will come out somewhat unscathed, if they are ever allowed to leave 😌 love this, love how different it is, the way kuroo just tries to weasel in. very monster and yandere vibes, very you. have i said i love this yet?? id willingly let him get me drunk on his cock, maybe never leave the peace of the mountains again
‘i want to say that i’m not a monster fucker’ bby the denial will get you nowhere haha. just lean in and embrace it hgfjkdlkfgjnkdl ahh but thank you this is such a sweet ask ILY!!!
Omg omg the monster thing kuroo was in ur latest fic is so familiar to me abdhdmfnjfjf. I remember being told abt a monster with VERY SIMILAR characteristics to it (aka the not being able to go inside a house unless invited and using fire to lure ppl out) AND JFC IT TERRIFIED ME. Esp how when i told ppl around me and they didnt recognize what it was, but it was somehow known to the kid that told me abt it.
(Some ppl thought it was familiar but still didnt know what it was)
Do u know what im talking abt? Hopefully u do
-🥚
GHFJDK so the monster in this is kind of based off the nekomata spirit in japanese folklore - they can appear like people, torment victims by reanimating the corpses of their loved ones, they’ve been blamed for forest fires, so it was just fun to use that as a basis and then go buck wild haha. anyway thanks for the ask bby!
Rest In Peace Kohsuke, you would’ve loved Haikyuu season 5😔✊– @joyvstheworld
poor kohsuke deserved better, i’m just mean to the oc’s i throw into fics haha
Monsterfucking ❤❤❤❤❤❤ a little annoyed you're making me simp for yan Kuroo though (a vibe tho tbh). You're so extremely talented!!!! &
This is probably a stupid question, but how did Kageyama react when he couldn't find y/n? How is life with yan Suga? I imagine probably awful BUT yknow maybe the stockholm syndrome set in fast lmao. Sorry, I'm going on a binge reading your stuff. - @oracleofdin
i will not apologise for making you simp for kuroo he deserves it the man’s a snacc. and as far as your second question, suga’s a very caring, very smothering kinda yandere, so i guess in some ways it’s better than what the reader had with kageyama but... pick your poison haha
That was so good. I’m so shook rn I can’t comprehend anything but how good that was and how good a writer you are
TYSM NONNIE!!! <33
Ok, so, I just read Final Girl and the lil' ticket addition to it and just---
Well, ok I've been playing Dead by Daylight a lot lately? And I'm just picturing Tetsu as the newest killer "The Trickster" and I'm positively RANDY.
Your writing is ALREADY thirst inducing and just as satisfying, but this has SENT ME- If you're not familiar, please...
https://youtu.be/iowkiPobYYQ
Understand my thirst. (I'd also like to clarify, I use a different skin for him that gives him black hair and he looks like Kuroo with an undercut.)
~ @the-casual-hedonist 🌸
i love how feral y’all got for final girl kuroo. like bo and akaashi had his fans, but i put a spiked bat in kuroo’s hands and y’all lost your goddamn minds and i love to see it. fghdjkvhfjdkls thanks for the ask bby
idk why but I love preggo reader as long as I don't pretend it's me 😢✋ I hate babies n pregnancy anywhere else other than horny haikyuu fics
i think that’s a valid thing for a lot of fans. the idea of breeding is sexy, the actual getting pregnant and having a kid thing... not so much. but especially with non-con scenario’s, it’s more about the aspect on control than the actual desire to have kids. but yeah, i feel you
Sorry to bother but uh was just wondering in fracture did Osamu kill his wife or was it actually an “unfortunate event” ? Love your work btw!!
he most certainly did :))
LMFAO RHI i totally get not liking cheating/infidelity fics (towards reader) bc IT HIRTS ME SO BAD I CANNOT HANDLE THOSE.
id be reading fics those fics like: tf you mean my yandere aimt gonna baby me and only want me??🤨🤨🤨⁉️‼️
EXACTLY! listen i get that it’s a fucked up fantasy, but in my fucked up fantasy you damn well better have the decency to be loyal smh
Finders keepers is the most beautiful thing I've read by you: I read it twice like I normally do and here's what I figured out the second time (that's when I analyze it and find the little tidbits of things that are much darker than they appear (: )
To start I LOVE THE DETAILS OF THEM NEVER TEACHING READER ANYTHING- at first I assumed "oh they might see her as a little sister or child or something" but realized thAT WAS THE ISSUE!! they infantilize her and isolate her from everyone but her group. the small details like that are what make the story amazing 😎💅
ahh thank you so much, nonnie!! pls this is making me soft 🥺
I just wanted to stop by and say that I love your writing and I hope you're doing well!!! Drink plenty of water and keep up the amazing work :) but seriously you're one of the best fanfic writers I've seen on tumblr! I read your "Imitation" piece about kuroo and i keep coming back to it, it's so good! I did want to ask if you think it'd be possible for the reader to ever escape with the baby (or at least attempt to). Or if Kenma would "help" at all just to put an end to kuroo's antics lmao
kenma would in no way help the reader, and tbh by that point if kuroo did get her pregnant, she’d be far too emotionally dependant on him to actually even want to leave, but thanks for the ask!
You know who I think would be a perfect Yandere in the JJK world? Choso.
🚨Spoilers Ahead🚨
After being locked in a glass jar for however long he was, and all that happened with his brothers, I feel like he would absolutely never let his darling out of his sight. He would be possessive. Obsessive. And Oh So delusional. Sure he’d be your anything - he truly is a softy - but to what end?🤤
choso would make an excellent yandere, ngl 😌
what au/troupe of your fav character(s) that you have written do you like the most?
(rlly hope this makes sense🙏)
i am always a slut for soulmate au’s :))
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family
requested?: yes (anonymous) //tldr, if alucard had a sibling (the reader, of course) dealing with the loss of family, both living and not
note(s)/warning(s): canonical character death, spoilers babyyyyy, violence and injury, angst it’s rare for anyone in this series to have a good time huh?, also for this being that the reader can literally look however you want, imma say Lisa isn’t white bc I do what I want and it’s my fic :) this is also the most i’ve written in a good while omg, im highkey proud so pls don’t let this flop
Lisa Tepes is dead.
Your mother, is dead.
Killed, burned alive. Gone to ashes.
All because the church had believed she was a witch of sorts. Several thoughts dance in the back of your mind as you gaze upon the pyre. Smoldering from the heat, the flames gone. Your father leaving his message, no, his warning, that he would act in one year.
“A farce that was!” You hear a shout, and you force down the bitter laugh, throat tight and eyes burning. Especially so when you slowly begin to hear continued shouts of agreement, from voices previously silent.
Here your mother was, her final resting place. Burned to ashes for some sick show of power.
And you could do nothing as she was mocked for it.
Your fist clenched at your side, you feel your nails cutting into your skin, but you walk away to return home.
And to say that the castle was no less better was an understatement. Your father was most likely in his quarters.
And when you finally sit down, the weight of your weary finally settling against your soul, do you allow yourself cry. Quiet tears turning to sobs as you muffle your voice with a pillow.
You had failed her. Missing the chance to save your mother, too late to have done anything.
But you pause, noticing the presence at your door, your brothers familiar knocking pattern resounding suddenly through the empty hall.
“Come in,” Your voice is embarrassingly raspy. As you clear your throat, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand. But it wouldn’t hide the redness of your eyes.
Adrian says nothing, and a part of you wishes he did. His larger hand takes yours. A comforting squeeze.
You blink again feeling your eyes burn, and you squeeze his hand back.
“Father is...” He trails off, no doubt thinking of what he could say next.
“What he plans on doing, it’s not justice.”
You stare up at him, But it would be deserving. A bitter corner of your mind supplies.
While Adrian had taken after Mother in his demeanor, much more kinder, more welcoming. You were no doubt like Father. Reserved, distrusting, easily prone to grudges if you were wronged in some way.
But you bite your tongue.
“He gave them a year,” You murmur after some time, “But no doubt he’s ready to calling his armies.”
At this Adrian turns alarmed. the warmth from his hand slips away.
“We must stop him!”
You’re still reeling from the events from earlier today, and a part of you wishes to have no part in his attempt to try and stop your father. But then you remember your mother.
Her kindness, regardless of how she was viewed for being different.
And your warily stand anyway.
If only you had more sense. Your father remains eerily silent as he embraces you both. His hold tighter, and while Adrian seemed convinced, you saw the dark look in his eyes.
The year had passed. You weren’t surprised to hear of the bloodshed.
It was naive to expect otherwise. While reluctantly following your brother, you can only stand, frozen as your blood feels like ice in your veins as your remaining family clashes.
“No.” Your voice is barely a whisper.
They don’t hear you.
Glass shatters.
And foolishly enough, you rush forward.
-
With your brother injured and fleeing, and you yourself were not free from any sort of pain.
Stepping in between the two as they fought ended with a gnarly gash on your shoulder, as you fell to your knees and blood slipping past your fingers. Your father stands in front of you, like a protective pillar as your brother stares in shock, quickly wanting to help you in some way.
And then the fight is over. Your brother is gone too.
The castle is much larger and colder now.
As you’re confined to your room, the wound healing into an angry red, then to a muted and dull scar. For a moment you wished it took longer, your father guilty and you were reminded of times you had been sick when you were younger. While you had not been too keen on the typical children’s books, reading theory on physics and other sciences only seemed fun when he would read to you and you’d ask questions in between passages. (Your voice funny from a stuffy nose led to laughter and a small coughing fit but otherwise it was nice).
But now was not the time to reminisce on the happy childhood.
You know you cannot stay. Ultimately, Adrian had been right. Once you feel as though you can move your arm once again, slowly, you begin pack a small bag. You didn’t want to build up any suspicions, finding some money in your room and whenever you could take a few coins or so from your father that he would not miss.
Extra clothes were folded and put away separately.
And you make your escape on a rainy evening, the uneven droplets helping hide your tracks. But you knew now that your father had brought back Hector and Isaac, new generals to help fight in his war, you had to be weary of the night creatures that would no doubt be sent after you.
Well, you were creative. At times flying in a transformed look, no one would suspect a bat in the dark of night afterall. And it was easier to. find good vantage points that way. But to also avoid any people, you didn’t quite trust yourself to not get into an altercation with a bigot.
You rarely slept longer than necessary, especially not when those dreams were memories or nightmares.
Now that you had learned how to walk, you were a right menace. It was an uphill battle in itself to keep you in one place. You were curious and the world you knew (being your father’s vast castle) was huge. Your childlike curiosity was never let down by your adventures.
You laugh quietly, which sounds like small squeaks as you fly up and hide above the gaudy chandeliers. Your father, giant coat gone, hair tied back and in a plain dress shirt and slacks as he searched for a curious toddler.
Snickers continuing as he paces down the hall. You hop down, landing slowly and feet planting into the ground, knees bent. Before you had down the opposite direction.
The lab usually wasn’t a place you could be allowed in on your own. But having heard that your mother was there, you knew it wouldn’t be a problem! So your little legs carried you along. Until you found the familiar doorway.
Dozens of tubes and mechanisms had you turning your head as you wandered in, your shoes tapping against the marble floor.
“Now what brings you here, sweetling?” The warmth of your mother’s voice has you smiling before you see her. As you run forward and hug her side, clutching her dress in your small fists. “Not causing trouble for your father are you?”
You shake your head grin betraying your word, “Nope! I’m not doing any trouble!”
“And how since when did that happen?” She laughs gently.
“Now.”
Your brother looks up from his own books, waving before returning to work. Your nose crinkles, so much for playing experimenting. But before you can say much, your nearly yelp as you’re brought up into the air by a pair of strong arms.
“I’ve found you, little wanderer.” Your father’s voice carries no heat behind it. Then again, he was always soft hearted for you and your brother. But most of all, your mother.
“I’m not little!” You pout, “I’m big now!”
-
You’re taken away from your reverie at the snap of a twig.
With your lack of sleep, as you had insisted on traveling more, you were less than surprised to have been snuck up on.
“Peace, my friend,” The old man murmurs. You keep your knife in an iron grip in front of you. Who you’re guessing is his son or grandson, has his hands raised the same way, but no weapon to be seen, magic, oh good. Then again, not like you needed a knife when you could make your nails go into claws and the fangs. Don’t forget the fangs.
“I can’t exactly be peaceful when it’s the middle of the night and suddenly figures in blue robes appear out of now where,” You answer dryly. But seeing as how the others behind the main two have not done or said anything noteworthy, nor were their stances make them look like they could really fight, you lower your weapon slightly.
Clearing your throat, “Although, I shouldn’t be swinging my own weapon around either.”
The old man just smiles gently. And you can’t help but be just slightly comforted.
In the end, the speakers stop for the evening. And the Elder, despite looking like a frail old man, is firm in his decision that you stay and “eat properly.” And like a scolded child, you listen. Food and drink all but pushed into your hands as you’re quickly brought into conversation, the previous confrontation all but forgotten.
And then you perk up when he mentions Gresit.
“So... the sleeping soldier,” You begin, slowly chewing on the sweet bread you had been given. “It was true?”
The Elder nods, “My grandchild and a traveller, they had gone to explore it. Well, the traveller had gone to save my grandchild. I will not hide the fact that I was a bit doubtful. But Belmont had proved himself a man of his word. Although, he does need to drink more water.”
You blink, a look of a surprise clear on your face. Belmont...
Fuck.
“Although I hadn’t expected the legend of the sleeping soldier to be realized so quickly.”
At your inquisitive look, the Elder begins to explain. Of a holy warrior beneath Gresit, who would come to save it’s people in their most dire of hours.
“The pair had come up with a man with long hair, like gold.” You couldn’t help but let out the breath you had been holding. So the Belmont didn’t try to kill him. you could breathe a little easier at that fact.
“Where are they now?” You ask, holding the empty cup in your hands, as you stare down as though waiting for something.
Getting your answer, you stand, adjusting your bag over your shoulders. You wave off the concern in staying, if it had already been several days since the Speakers had left Gresit, then you needed to cover a lot of land to get to your brother.
That is, until you saw the expression on the Elder’s face grow stern, as though he was scolding a child. With a heavier bag, one that the Elder insisted that you take some more things you could eat along the way, in exchange you give the Elder a small trinket you had been using to hide from the monsters of your father’s army, you finally set off. While your worries were not completely settled, your shoulders felt lighter. Metaphorically of course.
Of course, giving away the object that kept you hidden made it a bit more, difficult, when it came to trying to hide and travel at night. Much less even try to stop and rest.
It had barely been two days since you had left the speakers, and already, you had run into some trouble, a beastly creature’s claws barely caught on your sleeve, leaving your arm bare as you shuddered from the chill in the air. You can only sigh mournfully, you really liked that coat. But, better your sleeve than say, you actually getting wounded.
Your nails resemble claws, while your free hand holds the dagger in a steady grip. But being surrounded on all sides, it did not look promising.
Well, you thought mournfully, if you died you could at least see your mother again.
Until you hear the sound of what reminds you of a whistle? And then a sword flying through the air, slicing through the night creatures, giving you a chance to get some distance.
You hear the surprised shout of your name, and look up, to see your brother wide eyed, sword now returned to him, and a man and woman standing at his side.
“Um... hi.”
-
Much to your relief, the night creatures are easily taken care of.
And as you’re finally able to explain your story, you find yourself relaxing into the extra cloak given to you by the Elder.
“You mean you met the Speakers on your journey?!” A woman, petite with short blonde locks, who you learn is named Sypha, asks, and you notice the way her shoulders sag in relief.
You nod, “Yes. They all were safe.” If her shoulders sagged anymore she’d full on be slouching. You leave out the part of leaving a possibly precious trinket with them, not wanting her to think you cursed them or something.
“So you mean to tell me, Dracula, fucking Dracula, had more than one kid? That he actually had a woman not only give him not just one, but two children?” Is incredulously asked next by the scruffy looking man. Trevor, as your brother says.
You only stare in annoyance, sure your father was about to raise an army to annihilate the human populace but he didn’t used to be that way.
Before you can retort with a scathing remark of your own, Sypha elbows him harshly in the side. And you know it hurts from the way he immediately puts a hand where she hit him, eyes widening slightly. Serves him right.
“And what of...” Adrian- no Alucard as he wishes to be called, asks, near hesitant.
“Father?” You ask, arms crossed, “Same old same old. Planning the same amount of destruction here or there.”
As he looks to the snow covered earth, you roll your eyes, “Did you expect anything different?”
It’s quiet, and neither Sypha nor Trevor speak.
“No.”
You all sat around camp quietly for a while after that.
-
Your lungs feel like they’re being constricted. Your throat burns as you struggle to breathe, claws digging into your skin like knives. Before you’re thrown backwards, landing harshly against the wall. Books fall from the book case and your weapon clatters noisily from the ground.
You take shallow breaths, barely standing before you’re thrown once more. Curse your father’s stature and supernatural strength. You close your eyes, waiting for another attack and at least hoping to brace yourself for it, but it never came.
Instead, your brother stands in front of you, as he and your father remain in a standstill. Sypha and Trevor’s footsteps are rushing towards you three.
It all continues to move so fast, until he stops noticing the painting of your mother, as she had been holding your brother and then you as a baby, and the next thing you know, your father is staked through the heart. And with wobbly legs, you take your sword, and swing. So falls Dracula. But it felt like no victory.
You sit up with an alarmed look, stopping yourself from shouting.
That was... a dream? You rub your eyes, feeling that your cheeks are wet and you sigh.
When you see a shadow looming over you, the light of the fire giving slight visibility, you freeze. Before noticing it’s your brother and not his companions.
“Sorry,” You say, making sure to not look at him, so that he didn’t see your tears.
Quietly, he places his coat over your shoulders, sitting beside you, wrapping his own blanket loosely around his own shoulders. “You have nothing to apologize for.”
You only grip the jacket lapels tighter, shaking slightly as you hiccup, unable to stop yourself from crying again.
He must think it’s because you miss your mother, and you do. But this dream was far different. And you say nothing as he brings you into his arms. Your tears having long since dried when the sun rises moments later. But you find yourself falling asleep as your brother rubs soothing circles on your back, feeling the build up exhaustion finally leaving you.
When you’re awake much later in the day you can’t help but laugh a little when Sypha scolds your brother for being mean enough to make you cry, he didn’t you assure her quick enough, although you’re back to laughing when she then turns around to scold Belmont when he makes another slight comment.
#castlevania netflix x reader#castlevania imagines#castlevania imagine#castlevania netflix imagines#mine
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DEANCAS FIC REC
(last updated 7/1)
FINALLY. this is like. just a place for me to rec and write excessively abt the fics i've been reading lately. it won't be organized but it WILL be very earnest and i'll keep it updated as i find/remember more. also i have obnoxiously high standards when it comes to fic so these ARE the cream of the crop, if u will. the god tier. the s tier.
very loosely organized into "newer fic" and "classics." these are subjective categories. do what you will
✨ = new fic on the list
💖 = in my brain rent free!
CURRENTLY READING
these are the fics that i’m currently reading! may or may not get recced. usually i read the first couple paragraphs/lines and if i like the writing it gets bookmarked and put on this list.
lazarus needs a robe of scarlet thread by herrosesneverfall, 90k, canonverse au. dean starts getting stigmata. when i was getting back into spn there were a LOT of religious fics flying around bc that was the Hot Topic of Discussion. this was one of them
Three weeks ago, Dean woke up in a pine box. He thought dealing with the nightmares was going to be the most difficult part of his new life after Hell, but at least they were something he could understand. Something he could deal with. Something he deserved.
Then he began having agonizing visions of crucifixion. Wounds appeared on his body out of nowhere. Wounds that refused to heal and coated his skin with the sickly sweet smell of roses.
Stigmata are said to be the marks of saints, but Dean is not a saint and the wounds are only the beginning.
kingdom come by ahurston, 8.7k, coda to 15x18. cas gets to go home. im gathering all the s15 fix-its to my heart and holding them close
Cas wakes up on the coast of Maine. He makes his way home.
hunger by ellispark, 10.8k, s13 au. dean grieves cas, post s12 finale. perfect writing perfect awful heartwrenching characterization so far on dean’s end especially towards jack. nuanced emotional writing
Dean takes his meal and throws it away, plate and all. He's not hungry. How can he even begin to eat, knowing what he kept from Cas — what he kept from both of them?
They could have had something, and now all Dean has is this gaping, empty hole in his stomach, in his chest, and he has to learn to breathe and eat and move around it.
the law of equivalent exchange by awed_frog, 60.8k, canonverse. cas loving dean in all permutations of humanity, throughout time.
“And what’s the point of it?”
“Of love? There isn’t one. Loving is its own purpose.”
NEWER FIC
“newer” just means “i discovered it in 2020/2021 after coming back to spn fandom” so it very well could have been published before 2015 but really who’s checking. not me that’s for sure.
💖 so says the sword by komodobits, 85k, s4 au. cas guards the michael sword in the beautiful room. this is easily the MOST obvious rec on this entire list but it was the first fic i read when i got back into spn this year and jesus christ it set the bar sky fucking high. the way they create a coherent mythology out of the mess that is spn canon is incredible.
The briefing was simple: ‘Stand guard over the Michael Sword until the battle is ready to commence. Await further instructions.’
Castiel doesn’t mind working security duty; he was briefed shortly after the initial salvation of the Sword from the pit, and again before taking up his position. He knows what to do. However, it’s easy to forget that the green room isn’t real. Time moves differently there, the space ever-changing to make a prison of mountains, cathedrals, salt flats, orchards, and whatever Castiel was led to believe about Heaven’s greatest weapon—Dean Winchester is something entirely unexpected.
assimilation by komodobits, 5.6k, coda to 12x01. mary meets dean and cas and they go to find sam. such good character studies of all three of them. the best mary pov fic i’ve read
Mary always thought you were supposed to be able to tell. That you could just look at someone and know they were – you know. One of that sort. It’s not supposed to happen to her son.
cuckoo and nest by komodobits, 10k, ambiguously canonverse. dean and cas navigate relationship anxiety. cute, in character, and their relationship is realistic and the conflict well-written and emotionally nuanced and really really really good.
For a long time, Castiel thought that every earthly possession other than the immediately necessary was excess to requirement. But Dean – Dean who named his car, who keeps a photograph of his mother in his wallet, some thirty-plus years after her death, who still has the crumpled ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign with a sleeping pelican emblazoned on it from the Microtel outside of Roanoke where he first kissed Castiel, clumsy and unsure, under the unsteady fluorescence of an exhausted bathroom bulb – is sentimental.
It puzzles Castiel, where Dean draws the line between what is meaningful and what it is worthless.
💖 one white lie by komodobits, 11k, au. cas panics when trying to ask dean out and has to fake being a jehovah’s witness. it’s adorable and hilarious and it’s been ages since i actually got butterflies at a kiss in a fic but this did it. it did it. it felt like someone swaddled my soul in a cashmere blanket and kissed me on the forehead
Castiel takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. He doesn’t need to run through what he’s going to say – he’s already planned and edited and rehearsed it a thousand times. He is going to ask Dean Winchester out to dinner. If it’s not too forward, he’ll say, perfectly charming. You see, I’ve seen you around the neighbourhood and you always seem so earnest and I’d really like to get to know you bette— The door swings open, and Castiel panics.
He intends to excuse himself. He means to apologise and come back some other time. However, in a moment of blind fear, what comes out of his mouth instead are the words, “Could you spare a moment for Jesus Christ?”
a crash course in someone else’s history by annie d (scaramouche), 11.5k, set during s6. cas comes to as his s4 self without any memories of the past two years and has to figure out what the fuck is going on. it’s kind of like so says the sword. you’ll know it when you get to it.
Castiel is captured inside a trapping circle of holy oil set by Dean and Sam Winchester. The brothers call him "Cas", claiming that he has amnesia and that he is obligated to help them take down Crowley to atone for his betrayal of them. It's the strangest story Castiel's ever heard, and one he doesn't have time for because he's only just raised Dean from Hell and has work to get back to.
💖 cas and dean’s adventures in gardening by ahurston, 19k, post-canon au. a series featuring dean and cas living in the bunker, human. cas is very into plants. i read this yesterday actually and it made me smile SO much it’s just so lovely and sweet. i’m also a sucker for any fic where cas has a garden. he deserves a fucking garden okay
In this post-God world, everything is different. A little quieter, a little softer. Cas grows a garden, Dean cooks, and they take care of each other.
tall grass by aeli_kindara, 57k, post-s12. dean and cas live in the bunker on their own, and cas grows a garden. i did say i love fics where cas has a garden. plus domesticity, plus some good case fic, PLUS dean and cas’ relationship is so gentle and good
“I think we should have a garden,” Cas says.
Dean looks up from his beer. He hasn’t had that much to drink, but Cas still has a vague look of unreality about him, a splash of living color that doesn’t fit in the bunker’s echoing stillness. Dean didn’t hear him coming. A lot of the time, Cas is so unobtrusive it feels like Dean has the bunker to himself, with Sam away.
Dean shakes his head to clear it. “A — garden?” he repeats.
in a week by renrub, 2.3k, post 15x18. cas is in the empty. dean saves him. this is genuinely the best “dean pulls cas out of the empty” fic i’ve read so far like conceptually this entire thing just fucks. when cas is cycling through the barn scene. god. SO well written
Castiel is outside a barn covered in sigils. He frowns. This isn’t right. This has never been something he repented for.
i won’t even wish for snow by annie d (scaramouche), 5.6k, college au. cas goes to the winchesters’ for christmas. honestly scaramouche fics belong in the classics section bc she’s like an og deancas writer but whatever. mistletoe! banter! good in-character au! this fic’s got it all
It’s the third year that Castiel’s spending Christmas with his best friend’s family, and he expects it to be much like the previous two. Then mistletoe happens.
convenient husbands by annie d (scaramouche), 39k, canonverse au. cas is a phoenix, dean is a hunter. they get married and have a sick psychic bond. unexpectedly fluffy considering how the fic starts and i love the banter so much and dean/cas’ relationship gets fleshed out and organically developed it’s very cute
"It's only temporary, right?" Dean says. "Just until you're healed up, and then we'll never have to see each other again. So what do you say, Castiel, do you want to marry me or not?"
cinderwings by bendingsignpost, 181k, cinderella au. cas goes to a masquerade ball to save his people from an eternity trapped in a void. he meets prince dean. i can’t tell u how much this fic drew me in - thru good worldbuilding, but mostly thru cas’ social awkwardness. like it works PERFECTLY to his advantage in this fic and reading how expertly he manipulates social situations w/o any fucking idea what he’s doing is both hilarious and inspiring
Under the cover of a masquerade ball, Castiel has five nights to recover the key to his people's freedom. The world has changed greatly in the six centuries since their banishment into the void, but the task isn't impossible. Unfortunately for Castiel, this is going to involve talking to people - especially the Knight Prince who has taken an interest in Castiel and his "costume" wings.
as the crow flies by bendingsignpost, 3.4k, au. dean and cas go on a roadtrip. cas has wings! it’s so dreamlike and meandering and the slowburn is so good. honestly it reminds me of stevebucky/stevesam post tws era roadtrip fics if ur hip LMAO
Cross country road trips with Cas are the best.
long-term relationship by bendingsignpost, 2.7k, au. dean and cas have a Serious Conversation about their relationship.
Castiel says, budging over to make room for Dean on the couch, “I thought we should have a serious talk about our relationship.”
Reflexively, Dean laughs.
Castiel does not.
“Uh, Cas... you know we’re not dating, right?”
all this and heaven too by ftmsteverogers, 7k, ambiguously canonverse. dean is trans. dean and cas are fucking and lowkey hiding it from sam. perfect character study PERFECT trans dean fic it’s so fucking well-written
“Hey,” Dean said. “I’m not ashamed of you, okay?”
Cas raised skeptical eyes to meet his.
“I mean it,” Dean insisted.
“I understand you mean it,” Cas said. “But I don’t think it’s any better if you’re only ashamed of yourself.”
💖 the love story of the runner up by margo_kim, 4.7k, ambiguously canonverse. cas tries dating other men. bear with me here. this is an outside pov fic from an oc named miguel who is WONDERFULLY characterized and very endearing like i find outsider/oc pov to be on Thin Fucking Ice bc it always ends up as fandom/author self-insert but miguel is his OWN MAN. he gets his own lil arc and everything. dean and cas are concentrated perfectly crystallized versions of themselves and the little glimpses we get of them are amazing. ALSO i wrote like 9k of an spn vent fic (basically the same premise but w an oc named marcus) back in like. freshman yr of hs. so when i first opened this fic i was like what the fuck someone’s been in my google docs. very weird experience 10/10 regardless
“So you saw a white man in a trench coat pop out in an alley,” Paul says, “and you thought, what, ‘I want to see where this is going’?”
“If you get hung up on details like that,” Miguel says, “it will take a very long time to get through this story.”
For a very weird era in his life, Miguel dates an angel who is in love with another man.
sunshine by northernsparrow, 8k, set during s13. dean and cas have a long conversation about their Profound Bond. the description left me off-balance (it really. really truly says “dean is straight in this fic” like okay bro WEIRD hill to die on) but it pulled through w the relationship study and reassurance and snuggles. a sweet fic
One-shot with a single conversation between Dean and Castiel, set in a late-S13-ish world. Gabriel, Cas, Sam & Dean are all living in the bunker together, Gabe's been cracking certain jokes, Sam's found a certain book, Cas is injured and isn’t healing... and it's all making Dean wonder if his angel friend might have some sort of a "bond" with... somebody? Whatever that means.
Maybe it's time for a talk.
💖 still life by catchclaw, 16.5k, post-s8. cas, newly human, goes to live on his own for a while. he and dean maintain a relationship thru the phone. this is LITERALLY the only first person fic i fucking respect okay like i was skeptical! i really was! but the pov is PERFECT and also my man kevin tran is in this fic and i love him and miss him very much. oh and cas going off to explore humanity on his own..............perfect arc. very much in character we love that for him
Dean'd always thought that falling in love was a capital letter kind of thing, an Important Event you carved into the calendar of your life and never, ever forgot. But with he and Cas, it wasn't that simple.
it’s mostly cowardice, and bad timing by ferritin4, 1.6k, pre-canon. actually this one is just a dean study it’s not deancas but i spent an entire night looking for it and i need someone else to read it too. dean is smart!!! SAY THAT
Dean gets his GED.
a list of reasons the bunker shouldn’t get a sofa by lizbobjones, 5.6k, set during s12. sam and dean and mary and cas haul a sofa back to the bunker. cute domesticity and fluff
Let me count the ways that this is a terrible idea.
no kingdom to come by domesticadventures, 16.8k, canonverse. dean and cas deal with being stuck in quarantine in different ways. this is the one and only quarantine fic i’ve read and it’s really good lmao. dean and cas’ relationship is so organic and tentative in this one
“We should fuck,” Dean says.
Cas looks up from where he sits on his bed, hair still damp from the shower, frowning as he places a finger on the page of his book to mark where he left off.
There are a million things Cas could say here; Dean has rehearsed them. After lunch, his restlessness had given way to a vague panic, a dread that matched his every step and crept along with him from room to room. Eventually, he had returned to his bedroom and spent the rest of the afternoon pacing back and forth, playing out all the possible scenarios. When Cas asks him Why? or Are you being serious? or when he sighs and says, in that way he has, Dean, he knows exactly what he’s going to do. He’s going to shrug casually, like he isn’t invested in the answer, like he isn’t desperate for an outlet, and say, Why not? He’s going to raise an eyebrow and say, What, are you not interested? He’s going to crowd into Cas’ personal space, he’s going to shove himself right up in there and whisper Cas against his ear.
Instead, Cas says, carefully, “Okay.”
till the juice runs by deathbanjo, 8.4k, canonverse. it’s like dean’s being cursed to have bad hookups with men. SUCH a funny fic and the deancas tension is so simple and sweet and GOOD. plus cas is so enjoyably characterized here he’s so human and worn in and experienced in his own unique way. perfect use of rowena too
Apparently whoever drew up the venn diagram of Dean’s sex life decided the circle labelled ‘good sex’ and the one labelled ‘sex with men’ should be kept far apart.
turn of the year by kototyph, 3.9k, canonverse au. sam and dean get stuck out in the middle of nowhere on the winter solstice. what i wouldn’t give for a full 80k of this verse actually. also i went on a kototyph binge after reading shut up put your money where your mouth is and they have a SOLID spn repertoire
Fifteen minutes later, Dean gets back in the car with empty hands and ice in his fucking eyebrows. “Get the map out,” he says through chattering teeth, sticking numb fingers under his arms.
Sam holds up the battered 1995 Rand MacNally they keep in the side pocket, turned to a page of uninterrupted green. “We’re going to die,” he announces.
💖 bullets in the gun by kototyph, 4.9k, canonverse au. cas is a cop (i know. still) who gets kidnapped by dean in an unfortunate turn of events. GOD this fic is SO FUNNY. cas’ canny and strategic escape attempts render him a very active VERY funny pov character plus the hate attraction to dean is PERFECTLY WRITTEN VERY BELIEVABLE. dean’s kindness also shines thru even as he literally holds cas hostage like!!!! PERFECT characterization. both of them are so LIKABLE here. if you read anything on this list read this
“Sorry, sweetheart, but I’m going to need to borrow your car.”
as you will by kototyph, 1.8k, victorian au. cas endures a proposal mishap. it’s cute it’s funny it’s sweet!
"No?" Castiel echoes, dumbly.
and if i was looking too? by kototyph, 2.6k, au. cas is undercover where dean works. this fic is just so cute like. bird angels.................
There are some things Castiel hasn't told Dean, and there are some things he doesn't need to.
the most important thing by northernsparrow, 94.5k, s10 au. amnesiac cas raising claire until he comes across someone familiar. claire is so well characterized here i really loved her arc thruout this fic. she just wants her dad back and u can’t even blame her the author rlly does an amazing job creating realistic and heartbreaking motivations for her. oh and dean and cas (esp cas characterization!) are sweet in this but honestly the highlight IS claire for me
Jimmy Novak remembers nothing of the last six years. Reunited with his troubled daughter Claire, he's struggling to raise her on his own. The most important thing is to make Claire happy. But why does he keep having these dreams of wings, and of two men in a black car? (Canon-divergent from S10E11, when we first met Claire again and Dean was still struggling with the Mark of Cain. Takes places several months later).
there’s only one sure thing that i know by blinkiesays, 20.3k, post-s5. dean goes to help cas out in ohio and they end up building a home together. i love the writing it’s rlly funny and sweet.
Dean doesn't even get halfway through explaining before Bobby starts laughing. When he lets himself think about it for more than five seconds, Dean can almost see Bobby's point: he's faced down demons, witches, vampires, werewolves, ghosts, angels, and Satan himself and now he's been defeated by the God damn Midwest.
💖 to an angel, love and worship are the same thing by geminisage, 10.3k, post s15 fix it. dean grieves cas - and then cas gets brought back back from the empty. i didn’t have this in my bookmarks so i MISSED it the first time around on this list but this was another one of the fics i came back to spn fandom to. it’s so fucking unique?? it actually reads like spn like i think fic tends to soften dean/cas up and makes them more emotional + emotionally intelligent than is ever shown in the show. here the dialogue/characterization adheres RIGOROUSLY to their communication in canon in that dean’s not overtly emotional, and cas is very reserved. they have to negotiate their relationship exactly like they would in the show. it’s all clipped conversation and anger and hurt and (warning btw) LOTS of internalized homophobia on dean’s end but it’s SO worth it. dean navigating his [GESTURES VAGUELY] everything is compellingly written, emotionally true, and PERFECTLY characterized. cas characterization also amazing like u rlly feel the quiet devoted bittersweet love. ok this was long clearly it’s a good fic go read it now
Just as Dean knew they would, the weeks do stretch into months, and then into a year. Grief never gets easier, Dean knows from experience, but you do get better at it. After all, you can get used to anything.
the violin house by teh_helenables, 8.5k, post-s5. dean and cas build a home after stull. so slow and lovely and sweet and gentle. i need to put this here so that i don’t forget it tbh. it’s very much dean as a war wife cas as the husband away on the front
The Apple Pie Life is a slow process, but Dean and Cas are getting there—until Cas is called for battle and Dean is forced to wait.
💖 muscle memory by komodobits, 18.9k, au. amnesiac cas wakes up three years in the future with dean in his kitchen. komodobits DOES NOT FUCKING MISS!!! i CRIED at the end of this i had NO INTENTION OF CRYING the rest of the fic isn’t even SAD i just had to sit there at the end of it w tears dribbling down my face. INSANE work of art
Dear Castiel,
Hello – it’s Castiel. This must all seem very confusing, and I’m sorry for that. Dean says to tell you that this isn’t some kind of ‘time-travel stunt’, although I’m sure that won’t be your first thought. I know it wasn’t mine. I’ve told Dean to leave now, as this is my notebook and I want everything in it to come from me – or rather, from you. I know you think it's the fifteenth of January, 2010, but it isn't. At the time of my writing this, the date is the fourth of October, 2013. Dean Winchester is your boyfriend of a year and a half, and you no longer work at the library, and in early 2010 you were hit by a car and hospitalised. I’m sorry.
a.k.a the 50 First Dates Dean/Cas AU where Castiel wakes up on a day just like any other, except that three years have passed without his knowing, and Dean Winchester is in the kitchen wanting to marry him.
don’t forget the experience points by annie d (scaramouche), 10.8k, au. cas is sam’s work friend, and he and dean get to know each other. genuinely an adorable fic. i adore cas’ characterization in this it’s snarky AND awkward AND confident in a way that i absolutely believe he would be if he had 30 yrs of human life under his belt
It's because Dean was an awesome brother than he took such an interest in Sam's new friend. No, really. What happened afterwards was mostly an accident.
actus fidei by manic_intent, 5.6k, canonverse au. dean’s a priest, cas is still his angel. i was HOOKED from the description alone like That’s Everything I Love in One Sentence. Cool!!!!!!!!!!!!
On the very first time that Castiel manifests in front of Father Dean Winchester, he gets as far as "Rejoice, for you are blessed-" before Dean shoots him with a salt-loaded shotgun.
not with a bang but a yelp by strange_estrangement, 1.4k, canonverse. team free will leave yelp reviews. this isn’t d/c actually it’s just a crack-ish fic but the formatting is cool and the references are SO funny and so well done
What happens when you visit dozens and dozens of motels every year? You leave Yelp reviews.
the courtship of combat by bendingsignpost, 18.2k, medieval a/b/o au. cas is politically coerced into fighting in a courtship melee for prince dean's hand, and he teams up with two unexpected allies to do it. I KNOW HOW THE ABO THING SOUNDS but i swear it's done well - it's by bendingsignpost so ofc he puts his own spin on the premise. im absurdly into it. PLUS jack is in it!!!!!!! it's technically an unfinished series but the first part is so good just on its own
When pressed upon to mate for a political alliance, Commander Castiel dares to refuse his king. As “I do not wish to mate at all” is clearly the wrong thing to say, Castiel takes the other path and lies. “You must know my affections lie elsewhere, my king.”
King Michael studies Castiel’s face long and hard. Then, with a nod, he snaps his fingers, pointing to Castiel. “The Winchester omega.”
“Yes,” Castiel says with no real recollection of who that is.
The ruse of an unavailable omega works well enough, right up until that omega is no longer unavailable. Then, with what seems to be his entire nation cheering him on toward victory, Castiel must enter the melee to win his mate. Backed by allies, training, and his own natural talents, the only question is how well he can contrive to fail.
four letter word for intercourse by bendingsignpost, 194.7k, au. dean calls a sex hotline. OH BOY solid characterization excellent plot/premise like bendingsignpost is so good at turning absurd premises into realistic, believable fiction. also sex hotline fic is usually a BIG turn-off bc of the power dynamics/one-sidedness of a relationship based on sex work but. BUT. bendingsignpost does it well! it’s not weird at ALL i started reading and was immediately reassured abt its intentions and its plot direction
As a grease monkey turned college freshman, Dean's constantly three seconds away from being stressed out of his mind. It hardly helps that he's finally figuring out his sexuality in his thirties.
What might help with that stress is a little phone number (and a big credit card bill). If he can't figure out how to be bisexual in person, he can at least give it a go over the phone, right?
(It's probably a bad idea, but he really can't help himself.)
the tunnel of love by xylodemon, 21.4k, post-canon. case fic! dean and cas have to kiss on a loveboat to solve a case >:)
"We might," Cas starts slowly, pausing like he's choosing his words. "We might have to kiss."
Dean just stares at him.
when you have a future. by firebog, 17.6k, post-s8. dean and sam and cas learning to be human post-apocalypse. reminds me of robotmango’s writing! it’s kind of eccentric and very very sweet and funny.
Sam closes Hell. Castiel closes Heaven. The heroes save the day. There's no Heaven or Hell waiting to cause the next big disaster. There's no more end of the world. There's only a squirmy feeling in his chest that feels a lot like freedom. So, now what?
(Things I promise you in this fic: dog poetry, rabbits, and fluff)
six inch heels by alitneroon, 2.3k, canonverse. dean does drag! excellent fucking character study. prose is fantastic
Dean does drag on a whim, and ends up in way over his head.
sharing is caring by gateskeeper, 2.5k, canonverse. five times dean and cas shared something and one time they didn’t. look. sometimes u just need some saccharine tropey fluff. it’s VERY well written
Sam knows that Dean and Cas have shared a lot together, but ever since Cas became human permanently, it seems like they've been sharing a lot more.
Or: five times Dean and Cas shared something special and one time Dean refused to.
💖 empty spaces by schmerzerling, 60k, au. dean has to take care of his dying father, and takes up running to cope. that’s just the beginning. HEAVY trigger warnings for ED (specifically anorexia) and suicidal thoughts. there is a happy ending, but dean has to fight to make it there. god. okay. this is a dark fic. it’s also one of the most well-characterized fics i’ve ever read. dean’s spiral is excruciatingly accurate and written with the kind of wry compassion that comes from either extensive research or extensive experience. it’s also completely immersed in dean’s perspective - dean’s relationship w his dad, dean’s relationship w food scarcity, etc. it’s incredible. it’s kinda scary. it’s deeply sad. cas is explicitly autistic and it’s ALSO incredibly accurate and loving, and makes cas so true to his canon self. ugh. and i burst into TEARS at some of the accompanying art, which is so sparse and lonely and beautiful. 100/10 experience one of the best fics i’ve read this year
Dean is fine. The way he sees it, things are simple. He had a house and a family and food in his stomach, and now he doesn't. And yeah, that's a downer, but he's not going to let that stop him from being fine, because he's in control of the situation. He definitely doesn't need anyone to save him. And it's not like the weird guy with the nice butt from down the road is the knight-in-shining-armor type, anyway.
broken road by thegeminisage, 109.6k, 14x13 au. dean makes a wish and gets more than he bargained for. a lot of “john comes back” fics are kinda short on nuance, which this author has talked about a lot - and oh MAN does this fic deliver on nuance. john’s abuse is absolutely present, but his pov makes him a complex character instead of a flat caricature for dean to reject. and the way this fic resolves really makes it clear that the priority is dean’s emotional well-being over all else!!! this isn’t about dean taking the path fandom thinks he should take w his abuser (killing john, punching john in the face, etc), this is abt dean coming to terms w his abuse and finding his own emotionally satisfying way of resolving it. also dean and cas are in an established relationship and it’s very slow and sweet.
A 14.13 Lebanon rewrite. When Dean uses a wish-granting pearl to try and kill the archangel Michael before he can escape the cage in Dean's head, they instead wind up with a newly-resurrected John Winchester.
It's been more than a decade since John died, and a lot has changed: Mary is alive, Sam and Dean have what passes for a proper home in the Men of Letters Bunker, and they're living with angels. John doesn't know angels are real, he doesn't know about the fragile new relationship between Dean and Castiel, and most of all, he doesn't know that Dean said yes to Michael, or that Dean's plan to defeat Michael would send him to a fate worse than death.
Now Dean must contend with both his father asking questions he can't answer, and his loved ones learning about the darker truths of his childhood, all while constantly battling the archangel trapped inside him. But Dean coming to terms with his history may be the difference between this being the beginning of a journey—or the end.
home is not a place by imogenbynight, 6.8k, post-s11. human cas struggles with belonging, and dean struggles with their relationship. this reads a lot like komodobits’ cuckoo and nest, but it’s its own sweet little thing. they watch movies!!! very cute
In which Dean is the oblivious one for a change.
love: a retrospective by xylodemon, 40.7k, post-s12. dean tries to deal w cas’ absence after s12 and reflects on their relationship thru the years. this was written before s13 aired, so - no spoilers - but jack plays a different role than he ends up playing in canon. it’s kinda fun seeing ppl’s theories pre-s13 tbh. makes me VERY glad that they took jack in the direction they did in show. anyway this is THEE definitive “they’ve been fucking all along” fic
Pretending Cas is just his friend has been the only thing keeping Dean's head on straight for years. He never realized how much doing that depended on him making himself scarce in the morning ─ not until Cas came back and moved into the bunker.
✨💖 if it all fell to pieces tomorrow by spocklee, 37k, post-s15 fix-it. cas gets broken out of the empty - and he immediately makes a break for it. new fave fix-it!!!! the writing is so understated and so straightforward - SO in character for cas tbh - that every single emotional beat feels like a PUNCH. and there are so many amazing character moments it made my chest seize the fuck up!!!!! perfect characterization perfect relationship moments perfect cas/jack parenting moments. the yearning over the phone is OFF THE CHARTS and spocklee makes the most of that tension!!!! PLUS old canon characters get to make fun appearances!!!!! i cannot recommend this shit enough
After the Empty, Cas has to spend some time alone. Orpheus tries to convince Eurydice over the phone that it’s okay to turn around now.
✨ before and after breakfast by spocklee, 10.5k, post-canon. dean and sam and cas tackle a monster of the week case with unexpected consequences. perfect pov perfect relationship moments SUCH GOOD TENSION. again this writing style just lets the tension dial up to 1000% every word is meaningful and it makes my chest hurt!!! spocklee SHOULD have blown up during the spn renaissance and i STAND by that
The monster of the week is a ghost who hates meat, alcohol, and feeling yourself. Guess who it is during the commercials.
CLASSICS
isn't it cool how every person has diff fics they consider "classics?" anyway these are required fucking reading. if u've been around these will prob be old news.
💖 asunder by rageprufrock, 23k, au. dean and cas go to sam's wedding. i reread this once a year like a religious ritual.
Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:6)
💖 the girlfriend experience by rageprufrock, 15k, set during s5. dean teaches cas how to be human. mostly the sex part. literally the gold fucking standard of s4-5 era deancas fic and for deancas fic in general, personally
While it's not like Dean hasn't had a couple of truly regrettable hit-and-runs in his sexual history, this is probably the saddest fucking thing that has ever happened to him.
okay, cupid. by orange_crushed, 4.5k, au. dean tries to sign up for an ok cupid profile and has a revelation. as soon as i put this entry down i realized this entire fic rec was an exercise in futility, because if i could i'd literally just rec everything orange_crushed/robotmango has ever written. still one of THEE best authors in this fandom. go read all her fics. i’ll put the highlights here
"The dating thing?" Dean frowns. "Online dating is for weirdos. Robots. Dudes hanging out in their basements."
"You hang out in your basement."
"I have an air hockey table down there,” Dean says, icily.
💖 pwp: pie without plot by orange_crushed and majorenglishesquire, 82k, post-s8. sam and dean and cas quit hunting for a little bit to open a bakery. this is my comfort fic. i love it so so much.
he is in the kitchen with flour on his hands and an apron and there is flour on his forehead and cas leans across the counter and wipes it off with his thumb and dean says "thank you" and cas says "you’re welcome" very seriously and later dean makes apple turnovers and he only ruins them a little and sam realizes it’s not a real hunt like four days into it and he lets dean stay undercover for like a week and a half or longer maybe way longer because he is such a good everything
💖 la cucina by orange_crushed, 4k, post-s8. dean gets into cooking for a newly human cas. it's so gentle and loving and kind and makes me tear up every time. YES food is a comfort item and expression of love for dean. no i don't want to talk about it
Dean turns around and Castiel is picking through the jars, turning them over carefully to read the labels, totally engrossed. Dean watches him.
"Is there," Dean says, "uh, anything in there you like?" Castiel looks up at him and then back at the apples, sitting in a basket on the counter in their golden skins, ripe and pretty. Castiel smiles up at Dean.
"I don’t know yet," he says.
today, your barista verse by orange_crushed, 13.6k, coffeeshop au. a series of short sweet lovely fics where cas is a barista and dean is a smitten customer. literally the only coffeeshop au i respect
"Is that-"
"My number," says Dean, because he's a fucking champion, he's cool, he's collected, he's Captain Smooth of the USS Smoothtania, that's right. He is definitely not leaning against the counter for moral support. Cas doesn't looked seduced or impressed, though. He does not look like a dude who just met Captain Smooth and wants to ride the loveboat. He looks puzzled.
fata morgana. by orange_crushed, 6.6k, post-s9. dean is the king of hell. bela and cas team up to find him. bela pov. yeah you fucking heard that right BELA POV. BELA AND CAS!!!!!!!!!! makes me lose my mind i love everyone in this stupid desolate fucking hell wasteland.
The endless asphalt and broken road, the empty land and piles of human garbage, the unwanted ends of life, the cracked toys and broken screens and burning cars and gravel. Dean Winchester is the king of hell.
"Oh," says Bela.
That changes certain things.
💖 gran fury. by orange_crushed, 5k, pacific rim au. sam and cas pair up in a last ditch mission to save the world. permanently damaged me at age 15 and i've never recovered. major fucking angst warning.
They sit in silence and Castiel passes him the bottle. There’s not much left to say. Sam takes a gulp and it burns going down, like the cheap shit it is. He holds the bottle up against the light. He can see the Fury through it, distorted like a funhouse mirror. She’s a tomb but Sam loves her. Loves everything that’s left.
"To the end of the world," he says.
"To the end of the world," says Castiel.
💖 shut up (put your money where your mouth is) by kototyph, 24k, au. dean and cas get drunk married in vegas. dean renovates cas' house. this fic is SO MUCH BETTER than i remembered/expected and the entire series is fucking adorable go read it RIGHT now
Dean's done some pretty stupid things, but getting drunk-hitched in Vegas to a colleague he barely knows might just take the cake. His surprise husband, Castiel, is a little weird but likable despite that, and Dean figures they’ll go back to Boston, get a quiet annulment, and go their separate ways. Six weeks later, he’s still married to one of the strangest, most genuine and definitely most dangerously lov-- likable guys he's ever known. Dean doesn't know why or really even how it’s happening, but it’s getting harder and harder to remember that he has divorce papers to file.
not part of the plan by annie d (scaramouche), 338k, arranged marriage au. cas is slated to marry a noble from the winchester house. things spiral out of control. if you’re looking for an extensive well-developed political au, this is fucking it. i love reading about political machinations so this was FASCINATING to me.
Castiel's spent most of his adult life keeping his head down and staying out of trouble. This is a deliberate choice on his part, because as a cousin of the King, he'd rather stay unimportant and forgotten. This changes abruptly when King Michael decides that he has a better use for Castiel: he is to be wed to a noble member of the neighboring Republic, as part of an agreement between their two nations.
Castiel knows he has to obey, but that doesn't mean he won't rebel in what small ways he can. Unexpectedly, his actions end up having far-reaching consequences.
💖 all things shining by askance and standbyme, 142k, au. sam and dean and cas go on a hunt that's not really a hunt, and against all odds good things happen. it's beautifully written and has scenes that literally make my heart leap out of my chest with joy and awe it's just WONDERFUL it's a wonderful fic. incredible mythology too omg i found that the authors actually created the myth the entire story is based on - like they don’t pull a random one from history, they made one up THEMSELVES. they even self-published it on amazon if ur curious
Something in the world is waking up.
It isn’t long before it’s brought to the attention of the Winchesters and Castiel: miracles are spreading across the country, the paranormal seems to be shrinking back on itself—and it all has something to do with the missing prayer book of a traveling preacher who died over a century ago.
Dean is convinced it’s all the lead-up to another Apocalypse; Sam and Castiel aren’t so sure. Regardless, it sends them out on a less-than-typical road-trip, following the Mississippi and remnants of a very old story that seems increasingly to call to them. And along the way the trio learn much more about themselves—and the consequences and origins of love—than they’d ever have anticipated.
💖 broadway musical by griftings, 12.4k, crack. romcom where cas is supposed to play matchmaker to dean and jo and well. you know. it actually made me cackle out loud when i read it again so you know it's still good. absolutely one of the funniest fics i’ve read
This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.
The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.
Or, the romantic comedy where Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle are destined to get married, Castiel is given the task of playing matchmaker and fails terribly, the entire Heavenly Host becomes a sitcom audience, God warns against male pregnancy, and Jimmy Novak is incredibly unimpressed with angels in general.
the five people you meet in heaven by chevrolangels, 22k, ambiguously canonverse. dean dies and goes to heaven and meets five people from his life. NOT a post-finale fic but still horrifically sad. i remember sobbing hysterically when i first read this so
Heaven is white.
Well. Isn’t that fucking stereotypical.
Dean isn’t really sure how he got here. Or even why he’s here. And hell, for all the times the Winchesters have died, he thinks he ought to know the drill by now. But what he doesn’t know is when most folks go, they find something different.
There’s a system God put in place. That when you’re gone (for good), there are a couple things you gotta do first. There are five people waiting for you.
They are the five people you meet in heaven.
any port in a storm by microcomets, 53k, post-s8. dean and cas go on a haunted cruise for a case. you know what happens next. also the art is by anobviousaside and it's gorgeous
The angels have fallen, leaving Castiel graceless and Dean with, well, more of other people’s problems. When a string of couples goes missing on the east coast, Dean and Cas decide to investigate—and find themselves trapped and hunted on a couples’ counseling cruise. Although battling monsters at sea is dangerous enough, sorting through emotional baggage proves to be far more deadly. (And, in which Cas embarks to find his missing grace and Dean is put out. Not necessarily in that order.)
a turn of the earth by microcomets, 95k, pre-canon au. cas is on the run from the empty and crash lands in dean's life. at one point he punches john in the face. a fucking beautifully written character study of pre-canon dean, honestly.
Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.
Frigging fantastic.
(Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline preseries and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)
unfinished duet by microcomets, 5.8k, canonverse. sam observes dean and cas throughout the years. i remember this breaking my heart back in 2013!
Sam watches Dean and Cas over the years and notices a few things. (Or, Dean and Cas unscripted.)
💖 ergative/absolutive by glassedplanets, 8k, college au. dean and cas are best friends who meet in an astronomy class. i'm never not thinking about this fic it's so sweet and the friends to lovers is so soft and believable
He really shouldn’t be thinking thoughts like this about his best friend who literally just broke up with his girlfriend, but he knows he’ll blame it on sleepiness in the morning. He always does.
a certain light by flightagain, 24k, au. cas works at the gas n sip. dean is a customer. this author’s writing style is so lonely and heavy but it’s very lovely
Castiel works at the Gas-n-Sip. There are half-price nachos and flickering lights, there are office-workers and werewolves stopping by for snacks. Dean is a frequent customer, and his office might be haunted.
the one thing you can’t lose by majorenglishesquire, 5k, ambiguously canonverse. dean can pull cas around and it’s adorable. character study-ish. very sweet.
You know what I like a lot? The thought that Dean can just tug Cas anywhere at any time and Cas, who can lift tons without effort, who can demolish things with the light of his grace, who has battled and gone to war, has defended and broken, will just let Dean do it.
brother lover by twentysomething, 4k, set during s4/s5. dean’s jealous of sam and cas’ budding relationship. this fic is so tropey but it does it well and it’s funny as fuck
However- and it doesn't happen a lot- they have to invoke 'I saw her first.’
his fucking kids by 8sword, 3k, canonverse au. dean and cas raise claire and emma together. yes, claire novak. yes, emma of 7x13 spice girls fame. this was the first kidfic i read for spn i think. obvs written before jack or claire actually came back into the picture but it was the TEMPLATE of kidfic for me for ages
Jesus, the school should just have a parking spot labeled, “Reserved for the Novak-Winchesters,” because Dean’s getting sick of having to cruise around the parking lot looking for a spot every time he gets a call from the principal about Emma.
💖 what has eight tentacles and isn’t allowed to eat pie? by annie d (scaramouche), 16k, post s8. dean gets turned into an octopus. another fic that was SO MUCH BETTER than i remembered i fucking love when that happens. it isn’t even about dean being an OCTOPUS like NO. NOT EVEN. it’s ACTUALLY about the bunker and building a home and a community and a family and about PHYSICAL COMFORT and you can actually feel the world expanding at the end of this fic like a gusty sigh of relief it’s SO WONDERFUL. kevin is in this fic. ellie is too and i had to look her up but THIS is her!!!! danay garcia u were too hot to stay on this show but i love you and miss u
Dean watched an anime porn about this once, but real life turns out to be way less interesting.
Or, the one where Dean gets turned into an octopus.
💖 a beginner’s guide to communing with the dead by suspiciousflashlight, 77k, canonverse au. dean is a cop who summons a powerful entity to help him solve a cold case. oh my god i can’t believe i didn’t put this on here i love this one so much. the writing bowls me over it’s so confident in its worldbuilding like you’re IMMEDIATELY plunged into dean’s pov (FLAWLESSLY executed throughout the fic btw) and you just learn about the world as you go!! and it’s such a fascinating world!!! i love the magic i love the typical bureaucratic red tape procedures i love normalizing the supernatural. i ESPECIALLY love monsters as normal people in a society. at one point there’s this exchange
“Monsters,” says Cas finally. “Beyond the Wall there are monsters.” “You mean, like, vampires and djinn and stuff?” Cas shakes his head. “Those aren’t monsters, those are just people.”
those lines have stayed with me for years. i think about them every time i rewatch an episode of spn.
Maybe it's the little girl whose disappearance turned into a murder, and whose murder turned into a cold case, and who has now apparently decided to move in with him. Maybe it's the unacceptable hole left in his life when his dumb best friend and partner in (the prevention of) crime decided to go and get himself killed. Maybe it's his brother, whose high-profile career and fantastic girlfriend and first-child-on-the-way are steadily leaving Dean in the dust. Pick one. Pick all of them. The why doesn't matter so much as the what, and the what is this: Dean is pretty sure he's going completely, certifiably insane. Sure, he hasn't started wearing all his clothes inside out, and he still showers on a regular basis (anyways, that's not crazy, just a little eccentric); but there's no getting around the fact that he just threw away his life, his career, and his reputation by dragging out his mom's old necromancy book and summoning a Class A Forbidden Entity to his attic. A cranky one, too. With horrendous bed-head.
dean’s list by almaasi, 3k, canonverse. dean makes a list. short and sweet. i read this so much in 2015 that it literally got engraved into my brain line by line and rereading it caused synapses to fire that havent felt anything in years
Dean writes out a list of men he would go gay for. Sam has a suggestion to make.
💖 the path of fireflies by museaway, 63.7k, post-s8. dean and cas open a charming bed and breakfast in vermont. no, literally. another CLASSIC. i think about the food in this fic all the time...........maple bacon baked french toast......the cinnamon rolls.....it literally sounds so good
After his humanity is restored, Dean wakes up in bed with Castiel, a wedding ring, and no memory of the past twelve years.
long nights in cold months by pyrebi, 2.3k, au. dean’s an insomniac and cas works at walmart. i forgot i had this fic ALSO basically memorized. holy shit. pineapple in the fruit aisle.....................anyway it’s short and sweet and the “plot” resolves in such a satisfying way
When you're an insomniac, you get used to the "what the hell are you doing up, man?" look. Dean just hopes the guy who's stocking the shelves will stop giving it to him long enough to help him find some damn pineapple.
incredibly single & ready to mingle by imogenbynight, 3.6k, au. dean and cas meet on facebook. short cute au!!!!!!
Sam uses Facebook like the social media junkie he is. He's befriended literally every person he's ever had a conversation with since he got an account, which means that approximately—Dean checks—eight hours ago, he shared this horrible photo with something in the vicinity of nine hundred people. The caption below the picture reads “incredibly single & ready to mingle ;)” and roughly half of them have liked it.
Dean has never been so embarrassed in his life.
💖 unknown quantities by xylodemon, 8.5k, post-s8. after a post-case tryst, dean has to figure out his and cas’ relationship. human cas fics hold a special place in my heart. funny AND good dean pov AND a misunderstanding that i actually think works!!!!!
No one ever tells Dean anything.
(or: Dean Winchester and the not-relationship crisis of 2014)
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Mr. Loverman (Pt. 3)
Alright frens and ferns. we’re gonna go through this shorter chapter. Still like 3 google docs pages but my fics are normally like 4-6 pages. (if you can’t tell, i’m a one-shot writer AND HAVENT WRITTEN A STORY FIC SINCE I WAS LIKE 14. shoutout to the wattpad days.) so this one is shorter bc i need to work but i wanted to put this out. part 4 will be much longer. idk how long im gonna end up making this fic in the end. ((yall gotta keep me encouraged to focus on this thing bc my adhd will in fact leave you all hanging on a cliff hanger and we wont look back lmao)))
i apologize for the shortness. i also apologize for adding the person i hate with a BURNING passion. yall just dont know. anyway, i’m so sorry. and for those who haven’t gotten to 11/12, there are no spoilers. this is like independent of that storyline and kinda after but i’ll explain a little in the next chapter. but i wanted to keep this true to the cm universe. also i didn’t want to create a wholeass character with a tragic backstory to explain why they’re a psychopath when in reality they just suck. that takes too damn long
warnings: none that i can think of. ((i dont even think i swore once. im so fucking proud. oops)) and no, i didnt proof read. so roll with any mistakes.
mr. loverman 1: Bloop
mr. loverman 2: bloop bloop
____________________
“Y/n, have you seen anything or anyone suspicious lately? Anyone you recognized from one place appearing in other spaces?” Prentiss said.
Everyone was staring at you. You felt the pressure on you to say the right thing but you didn’t know. You didn’t know what to say so you tried honesty.
“No, not that I’ve noticed. Sorry if that makes things harder.” You sighed.
You felt like you were letting everyone down because you didn’t notice anyone. Everything in your life was mundane and nothing stood out. You were super aware of your surroundings but you still felt like it wasn’t enough. You spent more time than ever in your apartment, which was hell but necessary with everything going on.
“Here’s the problem.” Emily started. “We have received intel that you’re on a bounty hunter’s hit list. Not only that but they have been watching you for some time now.”
You were speechless. Who would pay to have you killed? Who did you piss off enough to pay money to have you killed? And what did this bounty hunter look like? This made you incredibly nervous and despite being away for two years, your body just reacted.
Spencer told himself not to freak out. This didn’t mean anything. You were holding his hand tightly. It was what you used to do every time you got scared. Spencer squeezed your hand a little bit to let you know he was there and then he felt you squeeze back. You didn’t let go of his hand through the rest of the conversation but Spencer was barely paying attention. Garcia eventually ushered the two of you out of the room and back to your temporary bedroom.
The silence between you and Spencer was incredibly loud. You let go of his hand as soon as you got to the breakroom, apologizing.
“I shouldn’t have done that.” You said. You figured that he would know what you were talking about. You sat in your corner of the mattress where you previously sat and Spencer sat in the space he occupied before the meeting.
“No, you were scared. It’s okay.” He said.
Silence that seemed to last forever happened. You were thinking about him and he was thinking about you. You were both so nervous about what came next but you didn’t know what to say. It took forever to come up with something but Spencer came up with something.
“I wasn’t lying.” Spencer looked down at his shoes.
“About?” You said, confused. You leaned your head against the wall. You were getting so tired.
“Missing you. You have been all that I’ve thought about through these past two years.” He said, finally looking up at you.
“Spence…” You said, yawning. You closed your eyes for a moment.
“I haven’t connected to anyone else as naturally as I connected with you.” He said.
“Well, I guess I can’t say anything different since I haven’t been able to move on.” You said, sleepily. It had been a long day and you were beyond exhausted. When you’re that tired, anything you say is bound to be unfiltered.
“You were the only one who cared for me, all of me, and didn’t mind everything that came with me. No one gets that. No one cares about me like you do, even now. I couldn’t bear to take the ring off because it would mean losing a piece of you. And I couldn’t do that. I may have broken off the relationship but that doesn’t mean I stopped loving you. To this day, I…” You barely said before you fell asleep.
Spencer thought about waking you but you looked so peaceful. He hated when he was left on a cliffhanger, especially like this, but you needed rest. So Spencer gently helped you lay down and covered you with your blanket. He was about to walk outside the door to guard and take a breather but you grabbed his arm and mumbled a very small, “Stay.”
And that’s what he did. He stayed, holding you while you slept peacefully. He was so comfortable that he eventually nodded off. That was the first time in two years that he didn’t have a nightmare that scared him awake.
When he woke up, you were nowhere to be found. Frantically searching, he ran all over the floor before noticing it was sunrise. You loved watching the sun rise in the mornings with a cup of coffee and a nice playlist going.
“Hey, Spence.” You said, looking out the window. You looked rested, not tired like yesterday.
“Y/n, you scared me. I thought something happened.” He said, looking at you. How did you make a sundress look so pretty?
“Sorry. I thought about waking you but you were smiling in your sleep, the small, happy smile you do, and I wanted you to sleep. Besides, I had Cat to keep me company.”
Spencer’s blood ran cold. That wasn’t possible. He was jumping to conclusions and you were sure it was just an intern or someone who…
“Hey Spencie. I’m having a grand time with y/n here. She’s a ball of sunshine.” Cat said, a fake smile fading into a straight face.
Spencer immediately grabbed for his gun but didn’t find it anywhere on his hip.
“Looking for this?” Cat took the gun out of her bag and pointed it directly at Spencer.
Your head could barely comprehend what was happening. You were instructed to put your hands up and walk into the conference room, sitting across from each other.
“And no touching. That’s no fun.” Cat pointed the gun at Spencer. You noticed that she was fixated on Spencer. You guessed that they somehow knew each other.
You were already in tears. What was happening? Could you make it out of this one alive?
_____________________
Tag list:
@dr-reid-ismyspiritanimal
@andiebeaword
@justanothetfangirl
@fanfictionreader05
@addie5264
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer x reader#spencer reid imagine#cm#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds
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hi! do you have any headcanons abt henry jr. particularly as the only nonmagical member of the fam?
i most definitely do!! okay, so for starters, both kat & tam were raised “without magic”; they still went to magic school and paige definitely used magic around the house but they had no active powers, just like henry. and they were all raised on these grand stories their mom would tell of these amazing adventures of the charmed ones and how they were all going to have these great adventures of their own what i’m getting at was for like the first six or seven years of his life henry thought he was magical. it wasn’t until all three of the mitchell kids were with piper and piper was explaining certain elements of her power to the twins and telling them how to use it once their powers get unbound and all that and henry was like what about me what will my power do? and piper’s like you have the most special power of all because you’re really smart & good at learning : ) and then like immediately texted paige like honey you need to explain to henry he isn’t magical bc the longer you wait the harder it’s gonna get.
it’s actually henry sr. who sits his son down and explains to him that he’s not like his sister or his mother, but how that’s not necessarily a bad thing. he’s mortal, but that doesn’t mean he can’t help people and do great things without magic. and henry sr. really tries to sell him on this whole idea of being a mortal, especially one that knows about magic, gives you a completely new viewpoint on the world, and allows you to see and understanding things in ways no one else will. (and uhh between you & me it doesn’t really convince baby henry that much but the fact that his dad takes him on fun little “mortals only” adventures helps)
uhh that being said henry still really Really wishes he was magical. uhh enter the reading phase. so, for starters, henry was already like smart and really good at / enjoyed reading. but in this sorta late elementary school thru middle school period he develops sorta two obsessions: 1) ya (specifically fantasy) novels. because all of these novels sorta follow the same basic rules of the plain protagonist becoming something great, being whisked away to this great world where they find out they have magic, where they find out they have this amazing destiny to fulfill, the nobody to somebody progression. and uhh henry really craves that. he really wishes that he is somehow magic, in some overlooked way, in some way that will manifest and prove him to be great enough to be a significant part of the charmed line, not some mortal afterthought. and then 2) magical texts/histories. and this is sorta the more shameful/secretive ones, the books he reads under the covers with a flashlight bc he just doesn’t want anyone to know that he spends hours scouring texts and stories of the charmed ones and various magical creatures desperately trying to find something he could be. no one knew who his biological parents were, it could be possible that somehow magical blood runs through his veins. he studies telekinesis and then and midnight hops out of his bed and spends an hour trying to knock a book off his shelf. he reads about orbing and it’s mechanics and tries to move himself across the room. his studies different creatures, and tests how high he can jump, how fast he can run, how long he can hold his breath underwater, trying to find some trait of him that could somehow be significant. (and of course, he keeps all of these trials secret to the best of his ability bc he would be embarrassed as all hell if it ever came out)
eventually, his studies of magical texts become less of a desperate search for something in his bloodline to more a flex on other witches. bc yeah, they might have magic, but he can still hold his head high knowing he will know more than they ever will. when tam & kat get their powers unbound and their practice moves from the hypothetical to the practical, henry still goes with his sisters to magic school, but instead of spending time in the classroom, he chooses to spend his time in the library.
he also loves studying the book of shadows. yeah, the library has loads more information on its walls then the book could ever contain, but the book has heart. it has this undeniable spirit and energy that ties to countless generations of the warren line, and he really likes to run his hands over the pages and pretend he’s really a part of the warren line (which his family is always ready to fight him on this and say he is a part of the line and blood doesn’t matter, but he’s just like come on guys. you’re my family and i love you but the warren line is a line of witches and i am undeniably not a part of that. but he still likes to imagine).
and y’know like henry’s like twelve or thirteen or something but he really has a lot of information and an insanely through knowledge of book and he’s just like flipping through it or minding his own business in the attic when wyatt (who at this point would be seventeen or eighteen) orbs in looking to id the demon he’s currently after and henry’s like oh you know like what’s it like and he really you know doesn’t want to be an asshole about it or imply he knows more than wyatt (though if you’re outside the family and questioned this kids intelligence he’s demolish you) henry really tries to pass it off as a casual curiosity/polite conversation. and wyatt’s like well im looking for this one demon with like x, y, & z and henry’s like have you thought about this demon? and he’s definitely right and wyatt can tell how much this w means for henry and really starts this sorta tradition of trying to incorporate henry into the research phase of demon fighting (which henry absolutely loves)
and it’s sorta like this self-feeding cycle he gets this role bc he knows a lot but he feels like because he has this role he has to know even more so if you feel like he was a voracious reader before,,,, whew boy are you not ready for now ( in my canon henry Can read latin). and i feel like he’s really close with wyatt bc wyatt is Also A Nerd and genuinely loves to hear henry ramble about this cool new thing that he learned and i feel like wyatt’s totally game to go get boba with henry and hear about all these things the kids been learning i feel like these two have a really close bond.
and while i’m on the subject of relationships, i feel like henry was definitely one of those kids who had more girl friends than he did guy friends bc a lot of his formative years were spent with his sisters who in turn spent a lot of time with melinda and pj as all four of of those girls were born in 07. so like you know henry would do movie nights with mellie, tam, kat, pj, & parker (and then peyton when she was old enough to watch movies without getting nightmares)
and you know right now he’s like seventeen and a senior in high school and i feel like he’s pretty settled into who he is. he and his dad definitely still to their little “mortals only” adventures, and like a part of him will always sorta be bummed that he isn’t magical, but he’s come to terms with who he is. and he’s not gonna let the fact that he is a mortal you know like hold him back or diminish him, because he is a part of the charmed legacy and the warren line, and he is carving out his own role for himself. and everyone else in the family definitely recognizes him as capable and yeah sometimes he does get left behind bc it’s objectively too dangerous to bring a mortal along and he’s gotten pretty good at being okay with that (or telling himself he’s okay with that). he knows who he is and who he is is undeniably self made. he didn’t coast by on some unearned, hand-me-down skill, and he wears that fact with pride. he may be mortal, but he doesn’t let anyone look down on him for it.
#can you tell i love henry jr#charmed#next gen#henry mitchell jr#charmed next gen#margaretsminiessays#💌
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i jUST found ur Veela au and im already invested!! how did harry react to being Draco’s mate?!??
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
Harry is freaking tf out
Draco’s still asleep and part of harry wants to wake him up bc HOW DARE HE drop this sort of bomb and then just sleep??
but madam pomfrey tells him that if he wakes mr. malfoy she’ll make him suffer bc he needs to sleep
and that harry needs it too and if she sees him still awake in a couple hours she’ll give him a sleeping potion
so after she’s tended to his wounds (which were thankfully minimal apart from fucking dying) he places his infirmary bed next to draco’s and falls asleep holding his hand
he wakes a long long time later (understandable, this boy hasn’t slept well in like a year)
Draco’s staring at their still linked hands, frozen, bc he remembers what he said and he thinks harry won’t want him anymore bc veelas mate for life and they’re seventeen ffs
he hasn’t noticed harry’s awake
‘draco’
draco snaps his eyes up to harry’s face and immediately goes red
‘i’m sorry, harry, i didn’t mean to tell you like that. it’s alright if you - if you don’t want me right now. i know i’m not - i’m damaged now and-’
‘Draco’
‘and i swear i tried to fight them and every day i thought of you but i couldn’t stop the crucios and-’
‘draco’
‘and i know i don’t deserve you-’
‘Draco!’
Draco finally shuts up
‘i don’t care what happened at the manor’
it’s a lie
harry does so care about what happened at the manor but not bc of the reasons draco thinks
he just cares bc he wants to know who he’s sending to azkaban first
‘and i never want to hear you say you don’t deserve me again. you deserve everything. i love you.’
draco’s at a loss of words
he was so convinced harry was going to break up with him
‘can you explain the mate thing to me?’
so draco tells him everything
about how he knew in fourth year and that was why he joined the order and the ridiculous care-taker instincts that have been driving him insane
he tells him all of it
down to how he felt him die
harry frowns and cups draco’s face
‘i’m so sorry’
and they kiss
cut forward to when madam pomfrey practically kicks them out of the infirmary (as soon as draco can walk bc apparently the spell did some good damage but it was mostly blood loss) bc other people need the beds
neither of them knows what to do then
everyone is still mourning for friends or family so thankfully they’re allowed to sneak away
remus and tonks have already gone home to teddy
draco and harry go to grimmauld place to stay with sirius for a bit
the news about their eighth year come out a few months into their stay there and neither of them are sure whether they want to go back or not
the aurors have already made it clear they’ll take harry (and all of them) newts or no
but harry doesn’t think he wants to be an auror anymore
he still has nightmares of the war
and so does draco
he sees how they leave him shaking, and how he won’t let harry touch him for hours afterwards curled up in a corner of their room
and honestly he thinks they’ve both had enough
but he doesn’t know what else to do
it’s not like either of them need to work
harry’s filthy rich bc of his parents
draco’s filthy rich bc since he was a spy for the order the malfoy fortune has gone to him without being touched by the ministry (lucius malfoy is in azkaban fucking finally)
but harry also doesn’t want to just not work
but he sure as hell doesn’t want to go back to hogwarts as a student bc he doesn’t think he could ever do that again
draco does want to go back for eighth year
in the whole year he was captive he didn’t do magic at all and he’s been struggling a lot with it
neither of them want to be apart
so
it’s mcgonagall who delivers the answer to them
she goes to grimmauld place personally
and before harry can even speak she tells him ‘i know you don’t want to come back as a student’
and then proceeds to offer him the defense against the dark arts position
although harry hadn’t thought of it before he sees now that it’s perfect
mcgonagall proceeds to turn to draco
‘and i know you want to come back to study. this way you’re both there and you’re both doing what you want’
she mostly wants them to come back bc she thinks they deserve one last chance to be children and learn silly spells and have feasts and not be the adults they were forced to be
they both agree almost instantly
then they’re going to hogwarts and they’re in a train compartment together
and then they’re at the feast and draco keeps batting his eyelashes at harry from the eighth year table and mcgonagall can see how this was a bad idea
and then they’re in class and everyone respects harry as a teacher - even his own classmates - bc somehow he just fits
and if at night draco sleeps in harry’s teacher quarters instead of the eighth year dorm then no one needs to know
(everyone totally does but no one says anything)
and then it’s the winter holidays and they’re lying in bed together, harry petting draco’s wings (they’re always there lately and madam pomfrey tells them it’s permanent now that draco’s finally with his mate and feels safe)
and he brings up the subject of getting their own place
draco kisses him before he can even finish the question
before eighth year is over they’re already looking at flats and houses
now that the war isn’t as fresh in everyone’s minds reporters are constantly bothering harry or draco or hermione or ron
harry’s taken the worst of it obviously
they never leave him alone
and so it’s hard to find a house bc every realtor wants to be the one to sell to harry potter and his boyfriend
so eventually they get tired of it and go have lunch in muggle london (after placing a strong disillusionment charm on draco’s wings)
‘harry’
‘hmmm?’
‘why not here?’
‘what?’
‘why not here? why don’t we find a flat here? in muggle london. no one will bother us. we can connect the chimney to the floo network.’
harry stares at draco for a whole two seconds and then kisses him senseless
‘i love you’
looking for apartments in muggle london is much easier than in magical london
it takes them a few weekends but finally they find one they’re both in love with
it’s a small one bedroom apartment on the top floor of an apartment building that has huge windows - draco needs those, bc he’s developed a deep fear of the dark and small rooms bc he feels too much like he’s in the dungeons at the manor again - and a lot of sunlight and it admits pets and a big kitchen - draco’s hopeless cooking but he’s been trying to learn and harry loves to watch the pinch of his eyebrows and mouth along to the muggle on the telly as she dictates the recipe - and it’s small and it needs some work but it’s theirs and harry could just cry
they move in as soon as eighth year is over
draco becomes a model for parvati patil’s clothing line
harry’s not at all surprised
his boyfriend’s fucking gorgeous
he makes sure to tell that to anyone who has the bad luck to sit next to him in the fashion shows he attends for draco
harry continues to teach at hogwarts
after all of two months of living together harry proposes
draco says yes ofc
they get married
and now harry can say ‘that’s my husband’ excitedly whenever he goes to one of the fashion shows draco’s modeling in
and then time passes and they’re every bit as happy as they ever were
and ofc it’s not perfect
harry still has nightmares
so does draco
draco still has days where he hands harry a coat and then kicks him out the door bc he needs time alone
harry still has nights he wakes up with a curse on his lips and his wand pointed at the wall
but they’re together, and they’re happy bc it’s what they fucking deserve
---------------------------------------------
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bonus: why is their luck in a deeply sad moment? | shawn mendes
some type of au idk man, shawn x goth ex gf
WARNING: there is talk of death and suicide in this chapter. read at your own risk.
AN: i cant squeeze this into the next big fic nor can i fit it into shawn meets bc everyone hated it so its a bonus in the gg story lmao also im starying the Next Big Fic in a few days :)
masterlist | annalise’s playlist
2026.
"Sometimes I think about the what ifs," Ann said, “but I like where I am. I like what I’ve made for myself.”
Shawn had to invite her over to his house a second time, because the first time left him with many questions unanswered. He couldn’t be mad at what she said, though. He was in the same boat; he liked the life he made. You know, without the crushing loss and run in with the supernatural.
“Well, I’m happy for you,” he told her, and he really meant it. “I’m glad we were able to successfully do our own things straight after breaking up.”
“Nothing like filling the void in your heart with work!” Ann replied with a giggle. She moved a strand of hair behind her ear, and that’s when Shawn noticed something.
He took her hand and noticed a tattoo on the side of her middle finger: The Triforce.
“You got inked?” he asked, impressed.
“Oh, that’s nothing,” she replied, grabbing her sleeve to roll it up.
There was a sword on her inner arm. It was varying in shades of blue, and it also had the Triforce on it. Shawn recognized it as the Master Sword from the Legend of Zelda games.
“All this is is proof that I’m a nerd,” Ann said as she rolled her sleeve back down. “I notice you have some more ink also… and that you still wear shirts half buttoned.” She pointed to his chest.
Her finger poked the exposed skin. It shouldn’t have been as tingly as it was. Shawn smiled and placed his hand over his chest.
“More than just that,” he told her. “But I can’t show you all of them.”
Maybe it was a little risky to say that. Shawn would have taken it back if Ann’s cheeks hadn’t gone a shade of pink.
“I could say the same thing…”
Shawn quickly came to learn just how many tattoos Ann had gotten over the years. A snake and tombstones on her other arm. Feather on her collarbone, roses on her shoulder. A quote reading, “...but I’m not anymore” with stars around it on her ribcage. Something on her wrist that Shawn didn’t catch because he was busy pressing his lips to her hips and taking off her pants, where he found another tattoo. “Lucky you.” He certainly felt it.
Everything about their time together was so familiar, so easy and almost home-like. Ann’s skin touching his. Her lips perfectly molding over his. The quiet, needy gasps they both released into the bedroom. It was like going back in time, and they were in Shawn’s Toronto apartment instead of his multimillion dollar condo in LA. It was soft and slow, despite Shawn pinning Ann’s arms above her head. He didn’t outgrow that particular move, and she still seemed to like it.
Shawn had never been happier to have been on a break more than now. Most one night stands in the past began and ended very quickly, because he was on tour or in between interviews or on a break for one day. This was one person that he didn’t want to leave behind. They lied down, sweaty and dazed, facing each other. It was silent, but not awkward. Everything had a nice haze around it.
That was also when Shawn finally made out what the tattoo on Ann’s wrist was. He picked his head up in confusion.
“Is… are those torches?” he asked. “Upside down? Just like mine… and are those my initials?”
It was simple line art, less intricate than his own. Torches in an X, with “SM” right below them. Shawn has been floored many times, and this was no exception.
Ann picked her head up as well. “It’s not what it looks like.”
Shawn looked down at his chest, his torches were exactly the same, sans the initials. He wanted to give Ann the benefit of the doubt, that this wasn’t some creepy fangirl thing. Some of his one night stands ended up like that, and it wasn’t exactly easy to forget.
“It’s for a friend of mine,” Ann explained, sitting up and covering her front with the blanket. She took note of the look on Shawn’s face. “Keeping someone’s light on beyond death, remember? I assume yours is for someone too.”
They were both sitting up now, and Shawn relaxed. However, he only relaxed a little bit because now it was time to get deep.
“Mine’s for Brian. He died last year.”
Ann’s face fell. “No. Brian, your best friend? Brian, the one who constantly took the piss outta me?”
He nodded. “He was… there was an accident. Flight of stairs. Instantly killed.” It was all lies, but no human would understand.
A hand went over his, squeezing. “I’m so sorry. He just, he just fell down some stairs?”
“A lot of stairs. I don’t know I guess he was running or something. There was no way to save him. People in the house heard the crash, but by the time they found him - when I found him - it was too late.” He had told this version many times, enough times to where he could almost believe it himself.
“Fuck, man. That’s… that’s fucking terrible,” Ann said sympathetically. “But I seriously can’t believe you just told me that.”
“Why?”
“Because now I have to tell you that mine is for Stella. Those are her initials.”
Stella Martinez. Now Shawn felt a little stupid… but surprised, and he was met with a sinking feeling in his stomach. He couldn’t believe it for a second, but it fully processed in his head, and his heart began to break.
“Stella from college? Stella, who was your literal opposite and also your best friend?”
Ann solemnly nodded. Then she looked down. “She… she killed herself.”
Shawn was stunned into silence, the tightness in his chest only intensifying. The entire time he knew Stella, she was always so positive and bubbly. She was the opposite of suicidal. That’s why it was such a shock… and so sad. Oh god, who was going to tell Camila?
“When did Brian go to the other side?” Ann asked after a moment.
“A year ago last month,” Shawn replied. “And Stella?”
Ann raised an eyebrow. “Two years ago last month...”
It was a strange coincidence, but still upsetting. Both Shawn and Ann lost their best friends at the same time of the year. The urge to spill everything was thick in the air. Still, neither of them said anything for a while.
Instead, Ann reached down to the floor to pick up her clothes. Shawn’s eyes were stuck on her and that was when he spotted another word on her back. Nightmare. Small font, right shoulder blade, surrounded by a cluster of skulls. Then, he realized what she was doing.
“Are you leaving?”
She looked up, bra in hand. She was quiet as she put it back on.
“No. No, I’m not going anywhere.”
And she crawled back into bed. She made the point to keep a distance from Shawn, who was still naked. He was on his side, looking at the woman before him. Only Ann could have sex with him and bring up the subject of death. That brought a new point to mind.
“How do you enjoy death?” he asked. “I think I’ve asked you this before, but after losing someone and attending their funeral, I’m having a hard time understanding your perspective.”
Ann took a deep breath, looking up at the ceiling. “I don’t enjoy the act of dying. People die every day in horrible ways. People mourn and fall into depression because of death. That’s not something to enjoy.”
“So what’s your deal with it?”
“I’m just embracing the face that it’s inevitable. I do that for myself. I will die eventually, or tomorrow-”
Shawn made a face; he didn’t like that thought.
“It doesn’t make it any easier when someone I know goes,” Ann continued. “You’d think with all the research I’ve done it would be. The ones we love leave this mortal plane, and all they leave is their absence. And that alone is a lot to process.”
“What’s the hardest part?”
“The what if’s.”
Shawn asked because he really wanted to know more about what happened to Stella. He had to know the things that led up to the tragedy, mostly because he knew Camila would ask for details, even if they were hard to hear.
He figured he should spill his side first.
“The last thing I said to Brian was to get the hell out of my room,” he began. “We were fighting, fighting over something so fucking stupid, and I was so pissed at him. That was our last interaction. He fell down the stairs because he was trying to find me in this big huge mansion…”
Ann sat up a little bit, hand over her chest. “Here?”
“Oh no, not here. I was staying at a friend’s house in London for a work thing. Place was huge, easy to get lost in,” Shawn clarified. “Brian, Andrew, all of them were leaving back to Toronto and I didn’t want to go just yet. Part of it was because I was still pissed. Maybe if I had run into him first before he fell… If I hadn’t kicked him out of my room a few nights prior… If I was less of an asshole…”
“Maybe you would have slipped on the stairs,” Ann told him. “Maybe you guys would have had an even bigger argument later that would have ended your friendship. There’s no way to tell, and sometimes that’s what sucks the most.”
Huh. Most people tell him not to dwell on it. No wonder Ann was a shrink now.
“Losing someone is one of the hardest things we, as humans, have to face,” she said. “It’s not easy in the slightest. Besides, the grieving period takes about three to five years, so you - we - are still in the beginning stages of it. Thinking about the what ifs, what you want to change, what you wish you could say to Brian - all of that is normal.”
The two of them let those words settle for a moment. Shawn’s eyes were a little misty, and redirecting the topic was probably not going to help. But he laid his stuff out on the table.
“What about you?” he asked.
“Me?”
“Your what ifs?”
Ann paused, looking around the room. “What if I had put my Master’s to use and noticed the goddamn signs?”
Shawn watched her, hoping she would at least return the eye contact.
“I’m an expert in this shit,” she said. “I have the years of school, the degrees, and the licenses for detecting things like this. I only figured it out the moment her dad called me.”
“How do you detect when someone is suicidal?”
“In her case, she was elated. When someone makes that decision, they reach a state of euphoria because they know their pain is about to end.”
“But Stella was always-”
“Believe me, I know. I hadn’t talked to her since graduating in Toronto, so I thought she hadn’t changed at all. But I would see on her social media, she just moved back to her parents’ house in Florida, and she hinted that she wasn’t happy about it.”
As if Shawn couldn’t take another blow. Come to think of it, he never heard much about Stella’s home life. He didn’t even think that it could be a negative place for her.
“I was in Jacksonville for work,” Ann continued, “so I hit her up, and we met up for lunch. We talked for about an hour, and she said that I was always a good friend and college wife and that she’ll always love me. And my stone hearted ass just said ‘cool, you don’t suck’ and that was that. A month later, she’s as blue as the pills she took.”
“Ooo…” Shawn sighed, cringing at that mental image. Sweet, warm hearted Stella cold and lifeless. Call it morbid, awful thinking, but Shawn wished Brian looked like that in death instead of the bloody mess he turned out to be.
“Yeah. And her parents had her embalmed and put in an airtight casket, but that’s a whole other rant.” Ann waved it off and lied back down.
Shawn didn’t know what else to do except lie down as well. While sharing the stories of how their friends died, he couldn’t help but feel just a little bit closer to Ann. The first time they met, it took fighting tooth and nail to get her to open up. Now, Shawn felt okay silently reached for her hand, and tenderly holding it in his.
Both of them winded up at the same awards show. Both lost their best friends. Both got the same type of tattoo to honor them. Neither of them anticipated meeting again. This couldn’t be a coincidence.
_______
goth gf taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou @ilsolee @mendesromano @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @iloveshawnieboi @someoneunimportantxx @goldenmndes @calyumthomas @shawnsunflower @shawnvvmendes @parkeraul @havethetimeeofyourlifee @chillingbythesea @wronglanemendes @softmendesss @peruvian-bae @theprivatewritings
#shawn mendes#shawn mendes fanfic#shawn mendes imagine#shawn mendes blurb#shawn mendes smut#shawn x oc#shawn x goth gf#if yall r pissedt abt brian#it had already been establishedt#i made my bed imma fukin lie in it
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Goliath, part 1
[prologue]
-- tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering tremoloTangible [TT] at 11:11 -- TG: yo TT: Hey, what’s up? TG: have u checked up on our tl lately TT: Depends. What century? TG: ours TT: Then no. I haven’t been there in several months. TT: Why?
TG: k so TG: the carapaces are still there right TG: and i sometimes check up on em to make sure theyre doin ok. get enough to eat etc TG: but theyve all been losin their shit lately and i mean its kinda hard to talk to em properly but i dont wanna beat around the bush here so im not gettin into that TG: theres been some concerning stuff happening on our good old earth al TG: my alternian is p rusty and my translator gave me some weird results here n there but im gonna send u an article abt it and trust that ur language pack can handle it -- tipsyGnostalgic [TG] has sent file ______.png --
You don’t have blood that can turn cold. You don’t have breath that can stutter in your chest. But some years ago, you were a human kid, and in this very moment, you remember perfectly how all these things felt.
TG: al
You reread the article. In your mind, your non-existent blood goes from freezing to boiling. You almost forget to switch your language pack to English when you reply to them.
TG: u still there TT: Yes. TT: Sorry. TT: She is turning Earth into a military base. TG: yeah thats what i was getting from it too TT: Hmm. TG: i dont like what that prob means 4 the carapaces TG: cant imagine shell give a shit about em yfm TT: Yeah. TG: idk abt ur part of the world TG: u said the apartment is underwater anyway aint it TT: It is, yes. TT: It’s still… I don’t know. TT: This might be silly. TT: But it’s still my home. TG: its not silly TG: this whole thing feels wrong TT: Yeah. TG: sooo TG: what do we do abt this TT: What? TG: we should b able to do something about this right TT: You wanna stop the Condesce? TG: ppl in other timelines have done it TT: That is correct. TG: we could do it TG: right TT: I have drafted a plan or two in the past. TG: o have u TT: I wasn’t sure if you were interested. TG: im pretty interested these days TG: the others not so much tbh but i cant blame em TG: theyre worried bc u know. i happen to be a lot less immortal than her or you TT: I’ve planned for that. TG: lmaooo TT: We’ll get you immortal and kill the Condesce, Rox. TG: man u rly are him huh TT: Told you.
Your name is Alan Strider. Sometimes, when you jerk awake at night, you are sure, one hundred percent sure, that Her Imperious Condescension is not done with you yet. Sometimes, when you sit on the deck of the boat you live on, recovering from nightmares, you think that she might come for you one day.
When that happens, you make plans.
You prepare.
It’ll be you who comes for her.
It’s you who’s not done yet.
i wanna hunt like david. i wanna kill me a giant man.
Roxy looks good when they come to meet you by your storage unit in Brazil. Grown up, you think, and determined. Nevertheless, something flickers over their face when you show them what's inside; when they lay eyes on the dismembered imperial drone you stole from your home timeline. You can relate. Your face doesn't show as much, but you feel the same every time you think about it.
You sit on scrap metal and talk about your plans. You have several, for different scenarios, and you accept what Roxy wants to change about them. The phrase Are you sure you want to do this is uttered back and forth a couple of times, before you both understand that yes. You're sure.
The way you end up agreeing on is simple enough -- if it works, you end up with a dead Condesce, a conditionally immortal Roxy, and a destroyed spare body of yours. If it doesn't, you have a list of other plans you can resort to. Stakes are high, but you've thought this through.
It's worth it.
So, you and Roxy get to work. You have to program the drone to go back home to mommy -- step one of the plan is both to find out her whereabouts, and to start coaxing her back to the planet she's having rebuilt. It might take a while, so it'll give you both time to… well, to gather up your things and make arrangements like pet care in your absence and telling your respective friends what's going on, you guess. You're not looking forward to this part of your masterplan, but you barely have time to think about it.
Anything that has you accessing an imperial drone's software is still prone to give you flashbacks bad enough to make your mechanical hands shake, so it's good that you have Roxy by your side this time. Practiced as you might be, they are still way better at this than you. You give them pointers to where they’ll find the parts of the programming you need to hijack, just to speed up the whole process, then you leave them be and go do your own work.
Roxy laugh-scoffed at the way your notes concerning the drone looked. When you disassembled it, you made yourself a map so you could put it back together, but it doesn’t look like something anyone else could ever decipher. It works for you, though. Part for part, the heap of metal starts resembling the huge beasts that almost killed the both of you on numerous occasions again.
“You wanna look over this before I finish it off?” Roxy asks eventually.
“I’m sure you did great,” you say, but you want to look over it anyway. You don’t get shivers down your spine now that you’re a robot, but you feel the sense of cold and dread in the back of your mind, going over the very program that made your lives hell, that both saved you and killed Dirk. Roxy reaches for your hand, and you take it. You exchange another We’re really doing this, huh? look, but nobody says it out loud anymore. You say, “Looks good.”
You captchalogue the finished drone, then transportalize back to Roxy’s part of your home planet, and release it. It’ll find its way back to the Condesce, and then promptly self-destruct, leaving in its wake only a message to goad her back to Earth. Once she’s made it back here, you’ll move on to the next part of the plan.
Until then, for now, you will wait.
Roxy hugs you before they disappear back to a different timeline’s Barcelona, and you disappear back to your boat in a different timeline’s Indian Ocean. Only once you are home and alone do you allow yourself to actually feel something.
Everything from Roxy messaging you to your feet hitting the deck of your yacht again happened without pause, your mind going on autopilot. Something was happening, so something had to be done in response, your plans had to be set in motion, there was no time to think about any of this. No time to fully realize what’s going on.
You stand there in the scorching evening sun of your current timezone, stare out at the horizon, and wait for the fear to come.
What hits you instead is cold, calculating, ready-to-maim anger.
You are not scared of her. Not when you know exactly what you’re going to do, where, how, and when you’re going to do it, to bring her down. You’ve been scared your whole life, and it’s enough, now. It’s enough. She’s taken your family from you, your childhood, your friends, your life as a human kid. If after all she’s put you through there is one person who has the right to destroy your home planet as well, it sure as shit should be you.
You square your shoulders, flex your hands, and refocus. You’ll have to talk to Alma to make sure you can time this coup just right to be back home for his big day.
And before that, after months and months of fighting it, you’ll have to tell your boyfriend that you’re doing the exact thing you promised him not to do.
There’s no going back now. You’ll make whatever sacrifices you need to end it once and for all.
#action post#posted ooc#goliath#:3c#big plot happenings. beeg plot happenings#if all goes well this'll have four parts#over the next............. month im guessing#oh (rubs my grimy hands together) i have such plans
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dude i had such a messed up dream
ok so me and my family are going to visit this guy, but just as we’re about to leave we get a call dude killed his family and then cut them up and the police are still finding the pieces a small part of me is realizing this is a nightmare, but like, what am i gonna do about that
so my mom looks at us and goes “oh he’s going through such a hard time right now :c we should go over and visit him” i think this is stupid, but we go there anyway by the time we get there it’s just me and my mom, bc dream, and we show up just as the police open the fridge and a finger falls out the guy, apparently a family friend, is just chilling nearby and shrugs, like this is normal and hey, there’s gonna be a mess, this is a lived-in home my mom’s trying to comfort him, im confused
time travel
now im in the house with a good friend, who i do not recognize, and it’s before the tragedy we’re in the attic, it looks like one of dexter’s rooms but with like a BBQ pit wrapped in plastic instead of a table i realize what’s happening and tell my friend, who mumbles something about needing to go get the priest this is MY dream, so i know that the priest is Bad News, but i let her go anyway.
instantly, the priest is there. he’s actually a minister, but i digress. he looks at the room, looks at me, and goes, “oh, this is such a shame :/”
its a cannibalism ring
i sigh, sitting there, bored with the dream, waiting as the dude impales me
minister looks at me friend, aka minister’s wife, looks at me i look down at me im just fine? like it feels weird but im not dead
im suddenly sitting in front of a mirror. there’s this weird harpoon thing in my chest and a couple spikes in my head. minister looks at me and goes, “ok. ok, this time I’ll go through the brain stem. you cant survive that. no one can.” i just kinda shrug and accept my fate as he drives another stake into my head. nothing happens
“oh. it’s my tech,” i realize. im a cyborg now. “it’s keeping me alive.”
this confuses them.
suddenly it’s later. a VERY nice looking lady bursts in with a bone saw in each hand. looks at me and goes, “oh, these people giving you trouble?” im a robot now, and i am d a m a g e d.
“yes” i say, watching as like, six kids follow her in. they don’t do anything. they just sorta look around as this lady kicks the snot out of the minister and his wife.
whoa. snakes. they were in the minister and his wife and the reason for the cannibalism ring and they are GROSS. one of the kids expertly scoops up a snake into a 2-litre bottle, which another kid has taped a paper to. the paper says “mean snaek” with a child’s drawing of a snake under it. the snake doesn’t like this and starts ZOOMING around the bottle. it cannot escape.
the lady holds the other snake and hands me a bottle. im still a robot, but ive been repaired and am also in training. i take the bottle. the snake is going to get free. i start to panic. i accidentally decapitate the snake. these snakes are special, and probably not snakes, as this only makes it a shorter snake. the lady looks at it. looks at me. “well, it wouldn’t be so bad if i just... let it happen, would it?” i panic. i try to stop her. too late. she lets the snake take over her mind.
i run, warning the kids, who all take off, save for two. they’re sitting nearby, totally unconcerned. “what are you doing?! they got her! you have to go!”
“im here to chronicle our journey,” one kid says. i am angry about this. “who’s to say nothing will happen here after I run off? i can’t take that risk.”
the kid next to him says nothing, but i know that he won’t leave.
i try to drag them along, carry them away, but they resist. the first kid has a notebook. i am a robot who was hastily repaired. i can’t save him. i know this. i try anyway.
and then i woke up and saw my phone as my alarm went off and immediately thought, “huh, big chungus time” and went back to sleep, leading to me being 15 minutes late to class so like, not a great start to the day imho
#dream#one-time-i-dreamt#hehe#but really#ive never so clearly remembered a dream before#especially one as dumb as that
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okay here me out: what if like you meet cal & y’all are friends & you like him but don’t wanna date him bc you know he mostly just hooks up but then you overhear him talking to the boys ab how you’re like a game changer & he’s never felt these things before & then y’all fuck & he keeps whispering things like “so beautiful” & “pretty girl” & ugh what a dream
ugh what a dream i unfortunately didn’t write the smut (sorry!) because i knew i was gonna butcher it. but it is super fluffy so i hope that makes up for it.
Words: 1.5k
Triggers: none
Story: In which you finally hear the harmony between your best friend, Calum, and yourself.
im taking writing requests!
“Seriously, stop!” you giggled, pushing Calum with your elbow. You were both grasping controllers in your hands, focused on the screen. Calum had killed your character, once again, irritating you. He erupted in laughter, loving the way you had gotten worked up. He knew you were bad at video games. In fact, it had become an inside joke between you two.
A joke. Ironically, the way you met: a huge joke.
Everything about college was a nightmare. You had forgotten your cutest clothes back home, hours away, and lost your school card far too many times to count. You were late to class multiple times, and only met one person, you’re roomate. She wasn’t friendly, only offering harsh glares layered with stress and annoyance.
Frankly, you avoided her. It wasn’t until two weeks later, on a cold night you met someone.
The street was overflowing with life; the lights beamed yellow along the sidewalk and each bar was opened late night, blasting music and conversation. It traveled in the night sky and danced around the stars. Even at 10pm, your small college town was alive.
You, however, were walking home from the local library and back to your dorm. You avoided the bars, headphones blocking out the movement of sound and feet avoiding miniature potholes in the pavement. Before you could take another step, a sudden tug at your elbow had spun you around, knocking melody out from your ears and your heart into a panic.
Before you knew it, your fist dug its way into a large, tough chest. You heard a yelp of pain and witnessed a man grasping his chest while leaning over.
“Oh my god! I’m so sorry!” you gasped, reaching out to the stranger. A sudden wave of guilt strangled your heart.
“Fucking hell– you just had to punch me?!” he coughed. He managed to stand up straight, revealing a dark blue t-shirt, holding onto his broad shoulders. His black hair fell just above his brown eyes, now piercing into yours.
“Yeah, you, like, grabbed me!” you exclaimed.
“I wasn’t gonna kill you, ya know! I was just playing a … joke!” he said.
“A joke?” you questioned, “where you abduct a woman?”
“No– don’t be dramatic. I was dared to hook up with the first ugly girl I saw. Glad that didn’t work out…” he said, rubbing at his chest. You were suddenly offended, all feelings of guilt fluttering from your heart and out into the sky to mingle among the music and stars above.
“You asshole,” you scoffed. Once again, before your feet could dig into pavement, you were stopped by a familiar grasp.
His grasp.
“Listen, I’m sorry,” he sighed, lowering his voice, “let me make it up to you. My friends may be assholes but i’m not. I’m Calum”
You looked past his shoulder, noticing a group of guys looking over and snickering to themselves, no doubt saving this for a future story while sitting together in suits surrounded by their dolled-up wives.
However, you gave in, and suddenly had a coffee date.
“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t always kill me off like that,” you said, throwing the controller onto the floor next to you.
It had been a year since that coffee date. You were shocked by the person you met and how different he was from that night. The Calum you met in that coffee shop had made your heart flutter. He made you laugh, filling the world with the sound of your laughter, and what he called, your undeniable smile.
Over the year you two had done it all: sneaked pecks on the cheeks on nights of light drinking, danced in an empty bar at 3 am, jukebox playing Nirvana, tangling around the two of you as he spun you around, almost tripping on your feet. He spent late nights with you in the dorms after your stress induced episodes, holding you at the edge of your cheap twin mattress and whispering jokes into your ear.
“Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?” he whispered, arm around you and his face in your hair, “it has great food, but no atmosphere.”
You laughed, not because it was funny, but because it was Calum, holding you, smiling against your hair and tracing circles into your arm.
And as much as your heart had sung for him, his didn’t sing for you. Instead, his heart jumped from girl to girl, party to party, and you didn’t want that.
You couldn’t imagine a life of just hooking up. Not with Calum, not with someone who made your heart burst in falsetto. So instead, you lingered, hearing about his late night hookups, as if they were trophies on a pedestal.
He would brag, boasting about bar scores, scratching ticks into the wall to count off another body, on another night. Every time he brought up his faux achievments, you thought to take a trophy and break it in half, throw it in the trash or burn it.
But you didn’t.
“Well, I’d appreciate it if you came to the kickback tonight,” he smirked, turning towards you.
“Right, as if I don’t have studying to do.” you replied.
“Studying? Come on– education is for losers!” He laughed, ruffling his hair with his hand.
“Fine…” you said, racking your brain with excuses, “I have a date!”
A silence boomed between the both of you, staring at each other with the paused expression of hiding smiles.
“Not that excuse again. You’re coming tonight, I don’t care!” he said, wrapping his arm around your shoulder, causing you to fall into his chest.
“Fine!” you shrieked, laughing and lightly hitting his chest, “I’ll be there. Promise.”
You arrived to a house filled with modern bleak furniture and concrete floors, leading to a large backyard, wrapped in fairy lights that resemble lightning bugs you used to catch as a child. A smaller group of people were here with you, drinking to light music that waltzed on the flowerbeds outside.
This felt different from most of Calums other events. Those were usually filled with blasting music and screaming people who made out in unlabeled bedrooms.
On your second drink and third guy failing to flirt with you, you still had your mind on one person.
Him. Where the hell was he?
You stepped back into the house, greeted only by people you barely knew and empty cups sprawled on tables. Calum was nowhere to be found, not until you came across an unlabeled bedroom. Then you heard it, like a dog reacting to a whistle.
“It’s just… something else,” you heard from the bedroom. It was Calum.
“Like what?” another voice came from the room. Luke, a friend Calum introduced you to months back.
“I’ve never felt this with someone. Everytime I’m with her I get.. nervous? It’s like I don’t even… care about anyone else. I want to be around her, and only her.” He explained, playing with the rings on his hands.
Metal, twisting up to his nail bed, and back down again, like clockwork.
“Only her? That’s a first,” Luke laughed in a failed attempt to lighten the mood.
“She changed it for me. I don’t care about who I’m gonna hook up with tonight. I just want to see her. I wanna see Y/N” he continued to explain.
“Then see her!” Luke insisted, “Who is stopping you?”
A series of shuffling came from the room, and suddenly you found Luke stomping out from the bedroom, looking annoyed. He whipped past you, leaving you looking at Calum.
The only thing separating the two of you was this door frame, until you walked through it and shut the door behind you.
A silence crept its way into the room, squeezing itself under the doorframe and standing between the two of you. It wagged its tail and jumped, begging for your attention.
You didn’t pay it any. Instead, you kept focusing on the sudden sweat that leaked from your palms, on your heart beating against your ribcage, and the face of your best friend, the boy from the bar with a hurt chest and dark hair.
“Listen…” Calum began, standing up and wiping his hands against his dark jeans.
“You know… you were all I wanted to be around, Cal. Just you, for so long,” you interrupted, looking right into him.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he said, “I promise.”
Once again, before you could take a step closer to him, the familiar feeling of his hands on you raced up your spine and back down again. It found its way to your shoulders and into your hands, where they rested on the back of Calums neck. And for a split second you felt your lingering fingers zap against his skin.
And then he kissed you.
Your heart began to sing, crescendoing into a high tune of excitement and nervousness. However, it wasn’t alone. It was paired with another tune that escaped from Calum.
Your hearts, for the first time, harmonized, and silence snuck its way back to the party to beg for attention from other strangers. The melody curved around the two of you, creating the lights of fireflies and street lamps next to bars. That stupid bar, you thought, made your chest sing.
And you both parted from the kiss, still held in embrace, surrounded by twisting sounds and blazing lights like stars.
“You’re so beautiful…” he whispered, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.
You looked up at him and smiled, your heart still and always in falsetto.
#answer#anon#5sos fanfiction#5sos#calum hood#blurb#imagine#calum hood: blurb#calum hood: imagine#my writing#my writing: 5sos#mine#college!calum#fanfiction#im not that happy with this but we'll go with it#thank you for reading#ily all#writing request#my writing: calum hood#calum hood: request
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hi everyone ! i’m terribly sorry at how late this is, i have been out for the entire day playin d&d but im finally here and super excited about this ! dbh has made me cry ( from sads and pure stress too ) on numerous occasions and i can’t wait to explore the universe of this wonderful rp ! when it comes to yours truly, i’m KAY, go by she/her pronouns, i’m 19 and i reside in the gmt+3 timezone for the winter ( stupid country dont know timesaving ) — you should def add me on disc.ord @ kay#5119, where i’m always around on mobile too ! on this lovely rp, i’ll be roleplaying as AKIO, the recover-droid #005, who is definitely a defect bc this boy is facing A Lot™ of emotions, which is ofc a huge sign of a defect — meanwhile, i’d love to establish some plots && connections for him, so pls hit me up or if you give this a heart ♡, i’ll sliiide into ur ims instead ! without further ado, you can find more about akio under the cut, alongside some connection ideas ~
— his life begins as a recover-droid to a 16-year-old yejun, in which he spends a lot of his time with the boy. they begin being close friends and after a while, it’s clear to see akio is showing huge signs of being a defect. he does things unprompted, things that override his code and rationality. the feelings of friendship and trust comes above anything else, and it’s clear that akio is not a perfect android anymore. when the news of recover-droids being defects is out, it’s clear that he’s going to be returned to the company. even though he has little he can do, he still tries to convince the others, tries to act like a proper android — but of course, all of it is in vain. a proper android shouldn’t cry, shouldn’t feel so broken at the thought of being separated from his friend. there’s nothing he can do as he’s pulled away from his house and torn by the company that made him.
— two weeks later, he opens his eyes in a junkyard and doesn’t remember anything but his own name. A... K ... I ... O. AKIO. it comes slowly, painfully — warning signs flash by his eyes, ERROR, ERROR, ERROR. missing pieces, too many of them to count, so critically low on thirium that he feels his skin crack. it hurts, in a way that he can’t understand, in a way that he has never felt before. why am i alive? why am i here? a bunch of numbers fly by his eyes, but he knows one thing, he has to survive. crawling through wires and mud on a rainy day, he pulls himself through the junkyard, with one eye seeing and a leg gone, he looks for pieces to make himself whole. it hurts, the eyes of other androids, the hollowness in them, the screams that echo from miles away, open lips letting out whimpers, pleading for life. it’s a nightmare as akio looks for pieces right and left to make himself barely functional, but perhaps he is lucky that so many recover-droids are lying there, broken, discontinued, DEAD. it’s a massacre, and his core burns, burns with pain, burns with the blood that’s not there. somehow, he makes it out of there, but that night continues to haunt his dreams to this day.
— soon after his departure from the junkyard, he meets a group of androids, a group of rebels walking around — the first thing that he notices is that they are not wearing proper android outwear. the second thing he notices are that are some recover-droids there too. at first he isn’t sure how to act, how to talk to them — what to expect. he’s still fearing being discovered, being sent back and torn into pieces properly this time. the loss of his memories are too much to bear, and when he isn’t even sure who he really is, it’s hard to take a step forward for a new start. the good thing is, it happens, he meets others like him that help him be who he really is, good friends who let him show his true emotions. akio wears his heart on a sleeve when he really shouldn’t, but it’s okay when he is amongst others like him. they all have their own problems in a world that’s so against who they are, but akio is more than happy to have found a home, a purpose: to help others like him.
— even though it is not the purpose he was made for, akio decides to learn more about androids — how they’re built, what makes them run. he wants to be a mechanic to help them out, to find solutions to help others who are thrown away to the side just like him. at first, it’s almost impossible to figure out someone who knows a lot about androids and someone who will help him instead of turning him in. a lot of people side with the government and hate defects to the core. akio isn’t sure what to do but ask around in his little circle, and then through one ear to another, akio learns of a name in a different city in the suburbs. someone who can help him, someone who can teach him. and after promising his friends to see them again, he takes off to find the mysterious man who can teach him all about android mechanics.
— he spends years with kenji, at first the man is cold, but akio manages to convince him slowly but surely, helping him with anything and everything until he begins learning more and more about how androids are built. kenji becomes a close friend, a confidant, someone he trusts. those emotions spark something in him that he can’t really remember, something he can’t put his finger on, something he feels the urge to find again. when he knows more than enough about androids to help them, he decides to go back to the city, to go back to the place they call the cavern so he can become helpful to other androids who are in need. parting from kenji is hard, but they promise each other to talk every day, and like that, akio is back in the city again. he will help androids in need, because they exist, and because they deserve to exist — happily and as a whole.
— personality wise, akio is really... emotional in a way that he is really easy to read? he doesn’t hide anything, so is very easy to understand and he doesn’t mind it too much. it’s very rare that he needs to hide anything, and he is very friendly especially with androids, wanting to help them anyway he can. he can be very reticent when it comes to his real past because he doesn’t remember so much of it, but he still tries to be open and friendly to promote a happy society where they can go to each other in need. for akio, all androids have is other androids, and he wants to show other androids that he can be trusted. around humans, he is more apprehensive; thinks that many of them will hate him for who he is, so he pointedly tries to stay away from them, or at least emotionally distant so that they can’t figure out he is indeed a defect. with his personality, it’s hard to hide, so it’s always a battle to decide how to act around new people.
CONNECTIONS IDEAS
— those other androids he found when he just left the junkyard. he was in a very poor shape and scared as hell, so this would be very interesting. — other droids from a couple of years ago that he was friends with. he left them to learn more about android mechanics, and it would be exciting to have them meet again. — i was hcing that kenji ‘an independent pro-android’ mechanic helps defects on a regular basis very secretively, so maybe your android was in a bad shape and akio & kenji helped them out? — akio returned to the city not too long ago, so people he met currently when he returned back to the cavern maybe? — akia is clearly a defect bc he does... cry at times. maybe your muse witnessed that, and their response to that? — people he doesn’t get along with! perhaps akio was too nosy for his own good and your muse does not like that? — people akio has helped, maybe they were injured, and akio was there to replenish their thirium and fix their parts.
that’s all about him for now and these are just some basic ideas from the top of my head!! i’d love to brainstorm and plot up some new things too, so like i said above, pls hit me up OR, hit the like button below and i’ll come to u instead !! ♡♡♡
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okay, so get this… I was in Newport the other weekend and ran into GABRIELLA GIBSON! They seriously look exactly like DOVE CAMERON, except a little less SELFISH and DESPERATE and a little more STRONG WILLED and CREATIVE. It makes sense why everyone calls her THE SYCOPHANT.
hey guys, i’m leigh and wowow i am SO excited for this group ?? first of all, i love gossip girl ( and confession time: i havent finished the oc yet, i’ve been watching it on and off for like 2 years now tho ) but jenny humphrey is the absolute love of my life ( her haters can fight me ) so i HAD to play the sycophant. but ok some things about gabby
so her dad is still a washed up rockstar from the 90s (but late 90s instead of early 90s) and her mom left them the summer before jenny started high school,, but unlike in the show,, gabby never went to live with her. it’s kinda like she might see her once or twice a year around the holidays,, but that’s about it
bc of this,, she does have some unaddressed abandonment issues
and the fact that she’s been rejected time and time again while trying to fit in has kinda only made them worse
which is why she basically gave up on all of that,, she was like it’s just not working i try and try and every time my life gets totally ruined
so gabby found another group to hang out with in hopes she’d finally fit in and that’s how she’s gotten started with dealing
bc it’s kinda like this is not good,, but at least im accepted here ??
tho she lowkey would still love to be accepted by everyone else,, she tries to play it off like she doesn’t care anymore,, but if they gave her the opportunity,, she’d be back in the fight for the crown
okok so she’s also still v v into fashion, but it’s kinda taking a back burner in her life right now ?? like that was kinda part of her downfall,, so even tho she still designs,, it’s not as much as she used to
plus one of the reasons she got into design to begin w was to make clothes that she thought would help her fit in
and now even tho her fam still doesn’t have as much as most others in newport, she makes good money by dealing and is able to afford more designer stuff than before ( tho she’s obvs still defs not anywhere close to being where everyone else is,, she’s just better at faking it now )
she’s pretty insecure,, but she masks it with overconfidence and acting like she doesn’t care,, bc caring is what got her into all of her messes so now she’s just like lol idc ( but she does shh )
she also has a problem with feeling unsupported ?? like her brother and dad just brush off her issues or her dad usually grounds her ( that’s another thing,, she’s basically never not grounded ?? then she sneaks out and get grounded for even longer ?? ) and she doesnt have her mom to run to to talk and try to work through her problems
so she just kinda has to deal with them the best that she can ?? which is not v good at alll
and since everything happened last year with thomas ?? wow she’s gotten so much worse
she feels so much guilt about what happened since it was her argument with her brother that caused him to get hit,, and she replays his death in her head a lot
and that’s another reason she’s really gotten even more into dealing is bc it takes her mind off of things ?? plus sometimes she’s able to sneak some pills to help her stay up at night,, bc every time she falls asleep,, she has nightmares about the incident,, it makes her feel sick to her stomach
okok i think that’s the important stuff. so like this or message me to plot ?? or expand on preexisting plots
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honestly you sold me there, i love idol groups who have like 2 braincells 🤣 i will willingly watch their one hour mafia games and debate night, i just watched their episode on knowing bros/men on a mission (which was prob like 80 min long...) and it was so hilarious omg i loved it!! minghao was so funny in it too even tho he is not the loudest in the group (which honestly i relate to a lot (the part about not being the loudest, not the part about being funny lmao)), and also his dance moves! so good! i can see why you bias him hehe; youtube has been recommending me the gose content lately and im excited to watch it :))
omg i know right...i asked my mom this (about how she remembers all the chinese characters) and she said apparently it is not as hard as it seems bc a bunch of characters are compound words (using two different characters to make one word or something)? but i think it is prob still hard if you forget a word or something bc you can't sound it out like in english. that's why i decided to learn hangul honestly bc the korean writing system is so much simpler (and makes sense) compared to other asian languages LOL. that's so cool that you could act as the translator for your family and the woman in french! did you learn french on your own or do you just naturally pick up languages easily? it is def true you forget languages when you use them less, my canto is a lot less smooth when im not at home (like i am now bc of covid). but i think at least you will have a foundation for the language so that helps a lot for practicing it again!!
wait that makes sense about china line making korean easier, like when lucas speaks i feel like i can kinda understand him better bc he's not as fluent in korean as the native members?? i do also know some veryyy basic japanese from watching anime hahaha but i think i am less familiar with it now bc i watch way more korean content nowadays 😂
ahh you understand me about hating bugs <3 im honestly not a huge fan of real nature besides like basic hikes on paved paths 😂 also i totally get u about being scared of heights, my mom and brother both are too 😬 i do know how to swim (i actually had to take a swim test for my college to graduate lmao), but when i was younger i rly didnt like water but since i was forced to learn to swim i think im okay now? i am lowkey afraid of the ocean tho bc it's so big and also i've watched too many shows about sharks in the water lol (even tho i know thats prob a bit irrational). oh another thing i dont really like is intense rollercoasters...im okay with the ones that dont go upside down, but there are ones that are at like 90 degree angles and go backwards and im like nooooo thanks 😅
OMG i just looked up jeonghan with long hair and i also legit thought he was a woman 😧 (but a very beautiful one) and yea i totally didnt know he and joshua (jihan) were a thing! are they like the nomin of svt 🥺 joshua seems like he has such a calming aura and jeonghan seems like the prankster of the group hehe. im interested to see if my biases will change as i watch more svt content!
also merry xmas eve!! cant wait to officially “meet” you tmrw hehe (it is actually still the 23rd for me rn bc of time difference but yea same thing) 🎄🤶✨
HAHDGA me too!!!! hahah yeah i loved the ep!! yeah hao is a very quiet guy, he just loves to listen and observe i guess but he can be pretty savage sometimes jahsdga i love him<3 also his dance moves!!!!! 😍 OMGG I’M so happy we should definitely keep fangirling over svt even when this is over!!!
ohhhhhh i see, interesting!! ohhh yeah i think korean writing system is easier, too; when i see chinese character to me they doesn’t look like letters yk? in my mind i see it as a tiny drawing i should memorize the meaning of, while hangul does seem like weird letters, but still letters 😅 i guess that’s because both you and i use latin (and i also use cyrillic) alphabet to write so it does seem weird to us? but perhaps it seems so natural and easy to your mom for example or someone who uses chinese characters to write! uhh i learned french in school but in addition to school classes i also learned it on my own bc yeah i reeeally love languages and i naturally pick up a new language easily, i guess that’s my talent 😅 but yeah you’re right! if i ever need it guess it’ll be easy to refresh my memory! ohh so you’ve been practicing canto more lately hmm??
yeahh i completely understand lucas and also winwin and i love them for it<3 yeah i get it, i’m definitely better at korean hahaha
ikr haha tho i love nature, truly, but it scares me 😅 omggg you had to take a swimming test to graduate???? 😨 sounds like a nightmare to me omggg what were you majoring in??? i was also forced to swim when i was younger (i guess in my surroundings everyone knows how to swim so yk it was expected from me too, which is when i developed the fear of water 😅) but i never learned ✌️ yeah and ocean is so unexplored so who knows what else lives down there 😨 it’s okay to be irrationally scared of everything<3 (at least that’s what i tell myself) OMG ROLLERCOASTERS ANOTHER THING I HATE (you saw this coming from my fear of heights, right) lmao i’m such a coward
yeah he is beautiful<3 uhh well idk they don’t remind me of nomin but they are very comfortable with each other, and they also entered the company around the same time and they’ve been close since their trainee days; some would say they are angel/devil couple in svt (jeonghan being the devil ahgsdfah) so you’re very much right!! i, too, am curious to see if your biases in svt change 🥺
AHH YEAH I CAN’T WAIT EITHER i am so excited omg 🥺 it’s 24th rn at my place so!!! merry christmas eve!!!!! 🎄💚
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