#(no judgement i had a really fun time either way i wasn't just there to bone lol)

[skullfaggot]

thinking about being drunk at a show and you catch my eye. we've been exchanging looks all night before i raise my eyebrow and nod towards the men's room. after a night of suggestive glances you bolt straight for it while i follow close behind. i pull you into the stall and you immediately fall into your knees and unzip my pants. you tell me how much you've been thinking about me all night and you'll let me do whatever i want to you and my brain immediately short circuits as i pull my underwear down just enough to shove your face onto my cock. "you must be one of those tumblr faggots, aren't you? those are my favorite kind. always begging and crying on the internet about how badly they need to be fucked and bred. how about you show me your blog and i'll fuck your face while i read out every single disgusting post on there. especially the ones where you talk about getting fucked by random strangers."

[avatar-anna]

Baby Mine

or just young dadrry being a dad

Young Dad! Harry x Young Mom! Reader

Reality struck Harry in the face when he realized Y/n was showing.

The text he got from Y/n saying she was pregnant? Mind-blowing, but also a little surreal. The conversations he had with his parents and management? An out of body experience. But seeing Y/n with a baby bump for the first time, with his baby? His knees nearly buckled from the stark realization that this was actually happening.

He was going to be a dad.

It was a terrifying thought. Harry was still a kid himself—in all the ways that mattered, anyway. He played video games with his mates, he stayed out late on the weekends, and it felt like just yesterday that he'd gotten his driver's license. He could barely successfully cook pasta, let alone take care of his own child.

And Y/n, the girl he'd only known for a short couple months. The girl he really liked to the point where he still talked to her even after his trip to LA was over, she was here with him, on tour, walking around in his hotel room in one of his t-shirts, her stomach stretching the soft material just enough to be noticeable.

"I thought we could have dinner together," she said, coming over to where Harry was still holding vigil by the door. "I was craving Mexican and I remembered you saying you liked tacos, so I did a little exploring, and voila."

His eyes darted over Y/n's shoulder, and there were in fact various Mexican dishes wrapped up in foil packaging. It smelled good too, but it wasn't quite enough to pull Harry from his stupor.

"I...I'm meeting someone. The boys. For dinner," he said.

It wasn't quite enough to pull his head out of his ass apparently, either.

"Oh."

Y/n blushed, her gaze flickering away from his. Harry felt like a dick, especially since it wasn't true. But he freaked out. He was freaking out. Playing house—or hotel—with a girl he barely knew and pretending it was perfectly normal for them to prepare to have a baby together was too much. All of a sudden, it was all too much.

"Have—Have fun, then. I'll probably head back to my room, I guess."

It was painfully awkward, but Harry didn't know how to make it better. So, like the grown adult he wasn't, he mumbled a reply and skirted around Y/n to set his duffle bag down before mumbling his goodbyes and leaving again.

He was gone for maybe an hour. While he was gone, he walked around aimlessly, letting himself get lost in an unfamiliar city. And in all that walking, he gave himself time to think.

Harry knew he'd been an ass. Y/n hadn't done anything wrong, and knowing that he disappointed her made him upset. Because the truth was, he really liked her. She shared his stupid sense of humor, she liked the music he liked, she had a cute little birthmark on her right shoulder that Harry couldn't help but feel compelled to kiss whenever he saw it. She was beautiful and smart and outgoing.

And now she was having his baby.

They were both to blame for that. Both of them had been careless that particular night, but Y/n had been clear to Harry when she told him about her being pregnant. "I want to have it, but I'm also not going to force you to have it with me," she'd told him when they eventually had a phone conversation. "I don't, like, expect anything from you, but I just didn't think it would be right if I kept this a secret from you."

"How did your parents take it?" Harry had asked because her voice contained a steely nerve that was deflecting non-existent judgement.

"Not great, but they'll come around. Eventually. I hope."

She'd said the last part so quietly, as if she wasn't truly sure her parents would actually accept the fact that their daughter was pregnant.

"I want to help," he blurted.

Y/n had looked at him with wide eyes, and a pang of guilt lanced through him at her surprise. She'd genuinely thought he'd leave her high and dry.

"Help?"

"I—I want to be a part of this, or help you raise it—the baby. I want to help. Like we're a team—Not a team. Like a—"

"A team. I like that."

Harry had been glad to be put out of his misery, though to his credit, he never imagined ever having this conversation, and he at least hadn't cried yet.

"You do?"

"Yeah. I think family is too much right now," Y/n said. "But a team...a team looks out for each other. Makes each other better."

So they were a team, though clearly Harry had been dropping the ball recently.

He was just...scared. Terrified. But he could only imagine what Y/n was thinking, how she was feeling. Since she'd joined him on tour, they talked about everything but the baby. Whether that was conscious or subconscious on either of their parts, Harry wasn't sure, but he knew they couldn't skirt around the subject forever. When he first told his mum about Y/n being pregnant, Harry insisted that he could do this, that he was grown enough to raise a baby. He wasn't exactly sure how true that statement was, but one thing he did know was that he could do much better than he was now.

When he got back to the hotel, Y/n was spread out along the plush sofa, eyes closed and arm resting idly on her belly. Harry wasn't so scared at seeing the bump this time around. In fact, a part of him was a little excited.

Y/n startled a little when Harry knelt by her side, her eyes bleary and a little red. "Sorry. I was gonna go, but I sat down for a moment and—"

"Nothing to be sorry for," Harry interrupted. "I'm sorry, actually. I was kind of an ass earlier."

Shaking her head, she said, "We don't owe each other anything. It's not like we're—"

"But I want to. I know things have been a little awkward, but I like you, Y/n. A lot. That hasn't changed."

"Really?" Y/n asked, and Harry felt bad when she sounded so unsure.

"Really. We...obviously didn't expect this to happen, but I want this. With you. Even if we are a little young and out of our depth here."

Y/n laughed. "Try a lot."

Harry grinned, resting his hand over hers where she was still holding her belly. "But we'll learn. Together. We're a team, right?"

Her eyes softened then. She ran a hand through his curls, the touch delicate but comforting, and Harry couldn't help but lean into her touch. "Yeah. We're a team."

They stayed like that for a minute, maybe two, but Harry eventually straightened, his grin widening as he said, "Right then. We should welcome the newest member of our team, shouldn't we?"

Y/n giggled as Harry shuffled around until he was face to face with Y/n's stomach. He lifted her shirt gently, his breath catching when he saw the baby bump up close.

"Hello there...baby. I'm Harry. Your dad," he said, only feeling a little silly. "You don't have a name yet, but I just wanted you to know that I love you, and your mum loves you, and even though we're a little on the young side, we're gonna take care of you the best we can. And so will your uncles."

"That was sweet, H," Y/n said, her fingers tracing the side of his cheek. "And...I do have a name in mind."

"You do? I didn't know that."

Y/n gave him a smile that felt like she was teasing him. "Because I'm telling you now. I've been testing it out in my head for a few days."

If Harry thought the baby bump made all of this real, talking about potential names would definitely do that. But whether he was ready or not, this was happening.

"Alright. Hit me with it."

A small smile creeped onto Y/n's face. "Simone."

"Simone," Harry repeated, trying it out for himself. "How'd you land on Simone?"

Y/n shrugged casually, but Harry knew that she put thought into it, that this name meant something to her. "It's pretty, and, I don't know, we talked about Nina Simone on our first date. It seemed right."

Thinking about their first proper date gave Harry butterflies. He remembered how nervous he was to go out with Y/n, spending an embarrassing amount of time picking out the right clothes and fixing his hair. But when he actually met her at the spot they agreed on, all his nerves went away, and he spent the whole date marveling at the fact that he was on a date with Y/n and all the things they had in common and how he didn't want it to end.

"It's perfect," Harry agreed, then bent his head to kiss Y/n's belly. "Hi, Simone. I can't wait to meet you."

A few months later

"Do you want to hold her?"

Y/n was in her hospital bed, hair hanging limp around her shoulders. She looked tired beyond belief, but she was smiling brightly at Harry as she held a little bundle of blankets, one of which was his mother's handiwork, Harry realized.

He found himself nodding, and before he was maybe ready, Y/n passed the baby over to him, and he was holding her. His daughter.

Harry looked down, a swirl of emotions squeezing his heart. She was asleep, the world's tiniest hand pressed against her cheek while she took deep breaths. Logically, he knew she didn't have any distinguishable features yet, but Harry felt like he could see himself and Y/n in her. Just gazing at her little face, he felt like he could see the next fifteen years playing out—the first words and steps, seeing Y/n holding her backstage, recitals and sports games, school projects, first loves, all of it.

An overwhelming feeling Harry couldn't name washed over him. It brought tears to his eyes as he realized just how much he loved her, how much he was willing to bend over backwards and protect her. And when he was able to break away from looking at her for a second, he found Y/n's gaze and saw the same look in her eyes, and one of understanding too.

Harry looked back down at his daughter, that overwhelming feeling rushing through him again, and for a moment, he wondered if that would ever go away. He wasn't sure he wanted it to.

"Hi baby," he whispered. Bending his head down, he kissed her forehead. "Hi, Simone. Welcome to our little family."

He knew Y/n was listening, but he didn't mind. It felt right that it was just the three of them sharing this little moment before everyone else flooded in to see the baby.

"We're a little unconventional as far as families go, and you'll probably have a different childhood than other kids," he said, not caring that Simone couldn't hear or understand him. He needed to say it. "But I'll love you with all my heart, and so will your mummy. You'll want for nothing because we'll give you the world, but you might have to be a little patient with us because we're new to the parenting thing.

"But I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy," he continued, his voice breaking. "I'll never let you feel unloved. I'll change your nappies and wipe your tears and make you smile. I'll be the best daddy for you. I promise."

Harry didn't know what the future held, but that he was sure of. He'd been scared and anxious the last few months, but now that he was standing in a hospital room holding his newborn daughter, he didn't want to give her, or Y/n, anything less than what they deserved.

Years later

"Dad, you're squeezing too hard."

"I don't care. My baby's abandoning me."

"I'm going to college!"

"That's what I said, isn't it?"

Simone began to squirm, but Harry still wouldn't let up. He was currently in the process of blinking back tears, and didn't want her to notice when he eventually did pull away.

"I'll be back for Fall Break," she said quietly, giving into the hug and squeezing Harry tight.

Harry took a deep breath and let go, even though he wasn't exactly ready to. Mustering a smile, he said, "I know. I'm just going to miss you. You're my baby."

Simone didn't balk or roll her eyes or contradict him, she just gripped the straps of her backpack as she gave him a wobbly smile. "You have plenty of babies to take care of at home."

Harry grinned and looked behind him where Y/n was keeping watch over the rest of the Styles family, though none of them were really babies anymore.

Looking back at Simone, he said, "Behave yourself, okay? Don't do anything Uncle Louis would do. And no boys for at least a month, please?"

Simone did roll her eyes then. "Sure, Dad."

That wasn't totally convincing, but he knew it was the best he was going to get. Harry pulled Simone in for one last hug, memories of the last eighteen years playing in his mind like a fast forward reel. Part of him couldn't believe he was already dropping Simone off for her first year of college, and he wasn't sure if he was ready to let her go. When he looked at her, he could still see the little baby he held for the first time, the one he promised to protect and do his best to raise. He hoped he fulfilled that promise.

"I love you, bug. Call me if you need anything. Any time, any place, you call me, okay?"

Tears appeared in Simone's eyes as she nodded. When Harry was ready, he finally stepped back and walked back toward Y/n and the rest of his family. As everyone got in the car Simone watched, waving to her siblings from the curb until Harry eventually peeled out of his spot, feeling like he was leaving part of his heart behind.

"Can we get something to eat?"

"In-N-Out!"

"There's no In-N-Out here!"

"A burger does sound good."

"Skip the song, please!"

"Play One Direction!"

Harry smiled as he shared a look with Y/n. He already missed Simone, but he knew she would be okay. And he found that it was easier—not by a lot but easier—to miss someone when there were five other babies, who weren't really babies anymore, to look after.

[mzannthropy]

Anne of the Island Chapter 11

Whew, LMM really threw everything into this chapter, the good the bad and the ugly. (This got long.)

So we're back in Avonlea and it's summer and Anne is reunited with her bestie Diana. RIP residents of Avonlea I never heard of or cared about much. I wonder if Uncle Abe foresaw his own death?

Congrats to Billy Andrews and Nettie Blewett. I also want to know (quoting Davy's favourite phrase here lol) whether he proposed to her himself or sent Jane again. Methinks he did it himself, if only bc I like to think that Jane refused to be his proxy again. We don't know anything about Nettie (at least I don't remember her from previous books) but I imagine her to be the bossy type, a formidable woman, you know, I think that would go well with his personality. Though why the hell am I investing this much time into a storyline that gets fewer sentences that I'm writing here, I cannot answer.

Now, Jane. I made a post on Jane in AOTI in 2023, not linking it here now bc it contains spoilers for later chapters. So, Jane resigned from Avonlea school and is going West. For illustration, this is what "West" means in Canada (PEI is so tiny!):

“Can’t get a beau in Avonlea, that’s what,” said Mrs. Rachel Lynde scornfully. “Says she thinks she’ll have better health out West. I never heard her health was poor before.”

Well, Jane did mention headaches in her letter to Anne but if it's true that her reason for going West is to find a man (and I think it likely is, though I also suspect that Jane wishes to get away from her mother, who is not a nice person) then--so fucking what? In this culture, there seems to be no worse fate for a woman than that of remaining a spinster. I get the impression that even an abusive husband is better than none. Then why blame a girl who is actively working on avoiding this fate? "What else would take her out West to some forsaken place whose only recommendation is that men are plenty and women scarce?" That's kinda the point, Rachel. Jane probably realised she's not getting attention at home, so she decided to go somewhere where she will get it, if only bc there aren't many women. Mrs Lynde is being unfair and judgemental here. Jane is going West to teach, not to have fun. Half a fucking continent away, where she doesn't know a soul, to a completely different environment, and different customs too, I imagine their ways will be very different from the ways of PEI. And she's going on her own. Jane is one truly brave young woman. In this instalment, LMM has gone out of her way to describe Jane as plain and boring. I think this is why she did it, bc there was to be a twist. And I like that Anne defends her friend. It also just occurred to me now that the proposal by proxy might have been a catalyst for Jane. Someone like her brother, who can't even talk to the girl he wants to marry, still manages to bag himself a wife, while she can't even get a man to look twice at her. That's gotta hurt. So she took her life into her own hands, instead of crying into her pillow at night. Good for you, Jane!

Next, Ruby. You know I've always thought that LMM chose to kill her off bc she was so wild about boys. Maybe she wanted to depict someone dying from tuberculosis, bc that's what used to happen in her times, and it had to be someone close to Anne. It couldn't be Diana, of course, so it had to be either Jane or Ruby. Ruby was probably the better choice for that. I mean, idk, I don't care for her much. She's crazy about boys and gets hysterical, that's all there is to her, but also she was an opportunity for LMM to write someone so vivid fighting against inevitable death.

Next, Aunt Atossa. One of the book's pointless plots. There already was a similar character in AOA and it wasn't as out of place. LMM should have written a separate short story for her. (There are actually 2 spinoff short stories for AOTI.) The only good thing is that Diana on their way there admired the sunset. We don't see her do that a lot.

Last, Anne wants to write a short story. Fantastic, tell me more!

[doe-eyed-fool]

Fear Of The Known

Lucifer x Fem!Angel!Reader

|Chapter Seven|

Warning: Drinking, Angst

Y/n and Michael set across from each other in the breakfast nook. She made some tea, in hopes to help relax Michael a bit. He looked so tired, and yet he was so tense. Almost alert.

"Is there something wrong?" Y/n asks carefully. Michael looked up from his tea at her. "I don't know yet." He sighs. Y/n furrows her brows in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Michael leaned back in his seat slightly. "Father called a meeting with me and my brothers, along with his other trusted angels. And telling from recent events it was not a...pleasant meeting. Not at all." Michael says as he brings a hand up to his head.

"I've never seen father so frazzled. With all this talk of, secret exterminations and that hotel ran by Lucifer's daughter. We were there for hours just trying to find a way to settle this mishap, and then we had to discuss what would be done with Sera. Oh and then, of course, the back and forth of what we should do about that hotel situation. I just..." Michael's hand ran down his face as he groaned.

"What did you decide?" Y/n asks. "About?" Michael raises an eyebrow. "Um, the hotel. The idea of redemption, it seems impossible. But then again, every possibility has the chance of becoming true." Said Y/n. "I'd know..."

Michael was silent for a moment. "It's a nice thought. But Hell exists for a reason. A place for all evil to reside. Humans are given the chance to be better, and when they die, divine judgement awaits. Whether or not they make it up here or down there, is up to them. The afterlife given is the afterlife they will live for eternity. There is no changing that."

Y/n looks down at her cup of tea. "I suppose it is a nice thought." She then inhales before standing from the table. "Michael, I think we both need a vacation."

Michael chuckles. "Yeah? You think we'd get more of them, considering this is paradise." Y/n crosses her arms with a smirk. "I also think tea isn't what we need right now." She looks over her shoulder. "Do you drink?"

"Not often. I can't even remember my last one." Said Michael. Y/n walks to the wine cabinet and looks for her best bottle. Y/n wasn't much of a drinker either, only really having one with dinner occasionally. But it was nice to have every now and then.

She picks up a bottle and grabs two glasses and returns to the table. "Has God made any sort of decision yet?" She asks. Michael shook his head. "No, but he's assured us we will have an answer soon."

Y/n pours each of them a glass. "Well until then, let's actually try to relax for once." Michael smiles and takes his glass. "Let's."

The two of them might have a tad too much, and Michael, being the responsible man he was, decided to cut himself and Y/n off. "Alright, this was fun. But." Michael stands from the table. "Bed time."

Y/n, half asleep and slightly tipsy, groaned. "Mhm..." Michael helped her out of the chair, holding her tight so she doesn't stumble. He then picked her up and walked to her bedroom. He walks inside her room and lays her on the bed carefully. Y/n yawned and closed her eyes.

As he was turning to leave, Y/n grabbed onto his sleeve, causing him to stop. He turns to face her. "Do you need something?" He asks quietly. Y/n mumbled something into her pillow, so he leaned down closer to her. "What was that?" Y/n looked up at him with tired eyes, her voice cracked slightly as she spoke.

"Don't go...Please Lucifer...Please stay."

Michael froze. Y/n tugged on his sleeve again. "Please..." Wordlessly, Michael crawled beside her, and tried to ignore the ache in his chest as he held her close to him.

Y/n winces at the morning light brushing at her face. She yawns and sits up in her bed, stretching her arms up above her head. She gets out of bed, and notices she was still wearing the same clothes as yesterday. Her confusion only lasted a brief moment before it hit her.

"Gosh." She sighed. "Poor Michael." She laughs slightly at the thought of him having to get her into bed. Y/n steps into her bathroom to take a shower and freshen up before starting her day.

After getting dressed she made her way to the kitchen, where she saw Michael. He was leaning against the wall, looking out of the window as he sipped on a cup of coffee.

"Michael?" Why was he still here? Michael turned to face her. "Good morning." He greets her. "Did you stay the night?" Y/n asks. Michael chuckles. "Yeah. Don't worry I slept on the couch, well, after you finally let out of your clutches."

Y/n's face heats up slightly. "Oh my goodness, I am so sorry Michael!' Michael shakes his head and walks over to the coffee maker. "Don't worry about it. How's your head?"

"Surprisingly fine. No hangover, thankfully." Y/n joins him. Michael hands her a cup and goes back to drinking his. "That's good."

"Thank you, Michael. Again, I'm sorry you had to deal with me last night. I hope didn't say or do anything else to make myself look like more of a fool." Y/n sighs.

Michael was silent for a moment. "If you did...I'm not telling you." He smirks. "Michael!" Y/n pouts. "What did I do?"

"Nope, I'm not saying." Michael teases. Y/n groans. "You're terrible."

"Aren't I?" Michael chuckles. "Anyway. I should start heading out. I have another dreadful meeting to attend. I suppose today we will finally have our answer."

"If you need to talk after, I'll be here for you." Said Y/n with a smile. Michael smiles as well, but couldn't help but feel that awful ache again. "I know." He heads for the door. "I'll see you later, Y/n."

"Goodbye." Y/n waves. Michael waves before leaving, shutting the door behind him.

Y/n would start her day as usual, run a few errands around the city, and occasionally be stopped by a few civilians who wanted to know what the future held for them. Y/n would never look too far, just enough to satisfy them.

She'd never tell them what would happen when something unfavorable is to occur. Instead, she'd advise them to be cautious of certain things, places, or people. It was best not to scare them, but she would make sure they were aware and careful.

As Y/n was walking, she could see the Seraphim's tower up ahead. Her head was telling to keep walking, but her heart said the opposite. Ever since the exterminations were exposed, Y/n couldn't help but wonder how Emily was doing.

She wasn't herself lately. And now that Sera's fate was on the line, Y/n worried for Emily more. So, Y/n decided right then to pay her a visit. She walked inside and made her way upward. As she walking through the hall, she noticed someone up ahead. They had walked out of Sera's office and were heading in her direction.

The closer Y/n got, she realized just who it was approaching. Joel. Y/n was unsure what to say as they both grew closer. She was never close to Joel, even all those years ago. Y/n opened her mouth to greet him, though she did not get the chance as Joel walked right past her without a word.

Y/n wasn't offended, Joel never was much of a social man. Then suddenly she stopped.

'Wait a minute.' Y/n turned around, watching Joel grow further away. 'What was he doing in Sera's office?' Y/n turned back around. With curiosity getting the better of her, she entered Sera's office, and was shocked by what she saw.

"That's a bit rude, barging in here unannounced like that."

"Sera?" Y/n furrow her brows. "What are you doing here?" Sera, without looking at her, answered. "This is my office." She says bluntly. Sera then gives her a sharp look. "We're you hoping I'd be locked away until I was given my punishment?"

"I was expecting you to be suspended from your duties until God made his decision." Y/n corrects her. "Has he already?"

"No." Sera mutters. "I am here because there is no one to take my place, otherwise I would have been suspended." Y/n glances back at the door for a moment. "And, why was Joel here?"

"Supervising." Sera's face scrunches in annoyance. "I suppose him watching my every move is part of the punishment they have planned for me. Now, why are you here?"

"I wanted to check on Emily." Y/n answers. "Emily is fine." Sera insists. Y/n furrows her brows. "She wasn't before. You kept such a gruesome secret from her for so many years after all."

"Y/n. I have a lot of my mind, and I do not need you to add to it. So if you'll please." Sera gestures to the door. Y/n said nothing more before leaving.

Y/n made her way back down the tower, a bit of power in her steps as frustration swarms in her head. She she was making her way for the exit, Emily walked in. She saw Y/n and smiled slightly. "Hi Y/n."

The frustration fades from Y/n as she smiles. "Hello Emily. How are you today?" She asks. Emily shrugs. "Doing better, I guess. At least those exterminations won't happen anymore. I hope."

"You hope?" Y/n asked. Emily nods. "There hasn't been any sort of answer. So, I don't know..."

Y/n puts a hand on her shoulder. "Trust me, you won't have to worry about those exterminations anymore. I know God wouldn't allow for something so unethical to continue."

"Do you know? Or do you know?" Emily raises an eyebrow. Y/n laughs weakly. "I haven't looked. But you really shouldn't worry. No one in their right mind would let those exterminations go on."

Emily takes Y/n's hands. "Please Y/n, will you tell me? It'd make me feel so much better if I knew it wouldn't. I'm really worried about Charlie and her friends."

Charlie? Was that what the princess liked to be called?

"Alright." Y/n says softly. "If it will make you feel better, I will look." Emily nods, holding her hands tighter. Y/n closes her eyes and waits for the vision to come.

The same red sky came into view, and she saw the very same hotel that Charlie was so passionate about. It all seemed to be fine so far, until the sky was broken by bright heavenly light.

And down came a swarm of angels, weapons in hand. They swooped down and killed any demon in sight. Some fought back against the angels, but the battle was starting to lean towards the angels favor.

And all of a sudden, a giant beam of light cut through the hotel, destroying it completely. The one who caused it's destruction was none other than Adam himself.

And he was about to face a dangerous foe...

Y/n's eyes shot open. Her breath was caught in her throat, and her heartbeat thumbed harshly against her chest. The exterminations would continue after all...

"Y/n?" Emily spoke up. "You're hurting my hands a little." Y/n looked down, she was holding onto Emily's hands tightly. She quickly took them away and apologized.

"What's wrong?" Asked Emily carefully. Y/n swallowed a lump in her throat. "I...I just saw something I didn't expect." Y/n began to walk past Emily. "I'm sorry Emily, I must go now. There's someone I need to speak to right away."

Y/n took off into the sky, unable to hear Emily as she called for her to come back. Y/n felt terrible for lying to her, she knew Emily wasn't stupid. Emily would find out eventually, and it broke Y/n's heart.

She flapped her wings harder, increasing her speed. There was no time to waste, that terrible future was coming soon. She had to do something to stop it before it was too late.

Y/n landed in front of God's palace, she rushed in through the gates and hurried inside. She was half way to God's throne room, she rounded a corner and suddenly bumped into someone. She stumbled back a bit.

"Whoa, what's got you in a rush?"

Y/n looked up and was met with the angel of death himself, Azrael. He looked down at her with a smirk. "You got somewhere you need to be?"

"I need to speak with God immediately!" Y/n pants breathlessly. Azrael hummed and leaned on his staff. "Ah, sorry. God's a bit busy right now. Maybe come back later?"

"But I need to see him now! I saw something terrible in the near future!" Y/n tried to explain. "Again, he's busy." Azrael repeats. "But, I can relay the message to him if you'd like?"

"Azrael, please, this is urgent! I am not leaving until speak with him!" Y/n knew better than to speak this way to him, he was her superior. But right now, she couldn't care less.

"What's going on here?"

Y/n and Azrael turned to see Michael approaching. "Little one here says she needs to speak with God. Says it's real urgent." Said Azrael with a grin. Michael looks to Y/n. "Father is in the middle of an important meeting at the moment. Tell me, what did you see?"

"The exterminations, they're still going to happen!" Y/n tells him, she didn't miss the hesitation from Michael. But she couldn't stop to dwell on it. "Adam is going down to the princess' hotel and..."

"Lucifer and Adam will battle."

Michael and Azrael were taken aback from this. They looked at each other for a moment before Michael spoke again. "Y/n, come with me." Michael walks ahead of her.

"But Michael, God must know about this! Sera is still letting these exterminations happen!"

Michael faces her, a slightly stern look in his eyes. "Y/n." He says sharply. "Please...just come with me." Confused, Y/n hesitantly followed him.

What ever was happening now, Y/n had the most terrible feeling.

Tags-

@bloody-delusion-expert

@simbalioness

@annybah

@alientee

[emotional-support-carbuncle]

filled out @larxxene's chart! you all also get to see my original convocation headcanon designs LOL

explanations below!

Venat - Andromeda considered Venat a close friend, but I think eventually Venat started seeing her as a daughter.

Loghrif - She and Gaia (original) got along well! She'd often go out with her and Artemis (Mitron) to hang out after meetings (when Andromeda wasn't going out with Hythlodaeus and Hades ofc)

Mitron - Andromeda had a fascination with the sea, so she and Artemis got along VERY well. Still, Artemis and Gaia were the pair and Andromeda only considered them Friends rather than Close Friends.

Emet-Selch - What is there to say? They grew up together. He and Hythlodaeus were her first kiss. He encouraged her to pursue Hythlodaeus romantically. She got him his seat on the Convocation. He was everything to her, and she and Hythlodaeus were everything to him.

Pashtarot - Pashtarot was one of the first members on the Convocation to really make her feel welcome once she was sworn in. They remained a friend of hers until the end.

Fandaniel - She was friendly with the original Fandaniel, but she considered Hermes a friend as well, especially since he helped her with the concept for the Alkonost! He didn't feel the same about her, it seemed, as he never confided in her his feelings of doubt towards the world, and seemed to keep her at arm's length.

Altima - Andromeda was a fan of music, and Altima often invited her and Hythlodaeus to shows on weekends. Hades would join her when Hythlodaeus had to work late, or if Andromeda asked very nicely if he could come (his love of theatre started there).

Halmarut - Saved by Venat when he was young, Halmarut was also one of the first members who really made her feel like an equal. One of her accomplishments prior to receiving the nomination involved a poisonous plant, and he was fascinated by the antidote she developed for it. They used to spend time together in the gardens when she returned from travel.

Nabriales - The original Nabriales was a stern, foolhardy man who made her feel strangely threatened during her judgement before her swearing in. She found him obnoxious at the best of times, and disliked him actively, though she was always good at hiding it. He had a HUGE crush on her after watching her in battle once -- something that Hades immediately clocked once taking the seat of Emet-Selch. (Hades may have taken a little too much pleasure in making sure he was touching Andromeda - her back or her waist or her shoulders - whenever he was around)

Igeyorhm - Andromeda found her intimidating at first, because Andromeda often felt like she thought the things Andromeda had to say were silly. She mostly felt neutral once she got used to the job. Igeyorhm actually found Andromeda pleasant, and respected her passion and commitment to her seat.

Deudalaphon - He took her by surprise. She didn't have much in common with him at first, but his inventions were quickly something she found herself fascinated by. I headcanon that she originally designed something very similar to Sage weapons with his and Emmeroloth's help, just for fun.

Emmeroloth - She was an extremely talented healer, and he actually respected her a lot and wanted to know her better. She was friendly with him, but didn't really spend all that much time with him outside of work.

Lahabrea - She was very intimidated by him. Everything she did felt like an inconvenience to him, and it wasn't funny like it was with Hades. He... didn't really care about her either way.

Elidibus - One of two who she was Azem before he became a member. I haven't decided how I feel about Themis and whether I think he's related to Venat or not yet, but I think she and him were very friendly, being some of the youngest on the Convocation. They were also the most "individual" of the members, and worked closely a lot since her opinion carried a lot of weight compared to some of the others for some things. They came to consider each other siblings, I think.

[itwasthereaminuteago]

|| Break ||

Matt Murdock x Frank Castle

Some NSFW goodies written for @frattweek! Day 5 prompt 'break'.

W/c: 2000

Matt throws Frank that annoyingly attractive signature smirk he always does when he's so certain he's right. He may have just made Matt cum so hard he thought he was gonna shoot his brain out through his dick, but now it seemed he may have been a little too smug himself in the afterglow.

"What, you really think I can't break you, make you beg for me, Frank?"

Frank just chuckles, taking a long draw from his beer and setting it down in a space amidst their hastily discarded clothes on the coffee table. "You're the one that begs and gets all needy sweetheart, we both know that. But alright, if you wanna, I'll uh, indulge your little fantasy."

"Okay…" Matt says calmly, as he slides his hand up Frank's chest and grips around his neck as he kisses him with a ferocity Frank isn't prepared for. "Enjoy this while it lasts, baby, because from this moment on, no touching."

"No touching… you?" He quizzes as Matt pushes him away.

"No touching me, no touching yourself. Nothing. And you know I'll know if you do, so behave." Matt taps him on the nose for emphasis.

Frank cocks his head to the side. "For how long?"

Matt pretends to consider the question before answering, like he hadn't already thought it all out beforehand. "A week." He presses the button on the side of his watch and it reads out the time. "Eleven, fifty five, PM."

Frank just laughs. "You remember I was a Marine, right? Blue balls ain't nothin' new to me Murdock and a week ain't nothin' either."

"Oh alright, yeah, like you and your buddies weren't jerking each other off in the showers on every day that ended with a Y?" Matt jibes.

Frank scoffs, pulling his pants back up. "Yeah, yeah, you joke all you like Lil Red, we'll just see who's beggin' at the end of the week, huh?"

On day three Frank knew he'd made a serious error in his own judgement.

Matt had dodged every conscious attempt Frank made to touch him in any way. With something as simple as getting home from work there was no welcoming kiss waiting for him. No warm slide of hands around his waist or neck when he was cooking dinner. They showered separately, and getting dressed or undressed and only being allowed to look at that sinfully gorgeous body as he peeled off that skintight Kevlar suit at the end of the night was uncomfortably close to torture for him.

Even unconsciously Frank was drawn to Matt like a magnet, he had to sleep on the couch after the second night because he just couldn't stop himself inching closer to him while asleep.

He missed the small seemingly inconsequential moments of contact the most. Gentle fingers through his hair, a brush of hands walking down the street, how Matt's fingertips felt on his face as he traced the crinkles around his eyes, his nose, and his lips. He missed his smell. The scratch of his stubble against his skin- God, the taste of him…

Sure Frank had been touch starved in the past, but that was long before he knew Matt and what he could do to him. But was he really that starved of Matt's touch that he would actually beg him for it?

It's not to say that it was easy for Matt to abstain either, although he had exempted himself from the 'no touching yourself' rule, as Frank found out much to his dismay when he heard the most obscene moans drifting from the bedroom when he came home one night driving him up the wall with the desire to swallow those sounds.

In a world without true sight, touch was everything to Matt. He was extremely sensitive to it, he wasn't sleeping on silk sheets just for fun. And to Matt, Frank was like ice-cream that had been left out on the counter, quickly melting into a creamy puddle just waiting to be licked up.

~

On day six Frank swore he was hallucinating things. From across the room it was like he could feel what he was missing, the weight of Matt sitting on his lap, the squeeze of his thighs around his hips and waist.

He scrubs a hand over his face, getting up to get a beer from the fridge as if that would actually do anything to distract him. He'd already taken apart and cleaned every single weapon he owned and that hadn't helped. Thoughts of the softness of Matt's lips slipped easily into his mind and stirred other feelings down below. He was reaching the end of his very short tether.

"C'mon, just gimme… one lil hug, one lil kiss, just one lil fucking blowjob- please!"

A satisfied grin split Matt's face. "Oh, is that… begging I hear? And from Frank, the big bad Punisher, Castle?!"

"Red, baby, you gotta gimme somethin'. I knew I'd miss it but christ, didn't for a second know just how bad."

Frank's given up, he drops to the floor and starts crawling on his hands and knees towards him and Matt's resolve almost caves. "Look, you're killin' me here. You happy now you've made me your dog?"

"Ah-ah." Matt swiftly gets up from the chair and teasingly backs away from him, always out of reach. "You've done so well, you've only got just over a day left, and then… well…" he has the nerve to raise a flirty brow and then saunter off, leaving Frank rolling onto his back with a frustrated huff and a hard on.

~

It was half past eleven at night on the seventh day and Frank was ready. He'd been ready for days but now he was really fucking ready.

"I swear I've never seen you this eager for anything, Frank," Matt told him, roughly running his towel over his hair. He was just out of the shower, grey sweatpants slung scandalously low on his hips with a soft blue t-shirt half tucked in. Frank was surprised he wasn't actually drooling.

Matt sauntered into the kitchen area, the hem of his shirt lifting up as he reaches for a glass from the shelf, allowing Frank a tantalising glimpse of his toned stomach.

"Red, c'mon, fuck…" he rounds the counter after him but Matt dodges away yet again, smirking.

"Hey! There's still half an hour to go y'know."

Frank groans, slumping his upper body across the countertop as he watches Matt's throat work as he takes big gulps of water. "You're loving drawin' this out, makin' me suffer ain't ya? Asshole."

"I might-" Matt halts suddenly and Frank lifts up slightly as he sees him do that telltale tilt of the head when he's heard something. Usually something bad.

"Aw fuck. You gotta be kidding me. What is it?"

When he sees Matt making for his gear and start suiting up with haste and tying on his mask, Frank grabs a couple of knives and stuffs a gun in the back of his pants.

"Mugging. Two blocks away."

"Shit, shit, shit. Okay, let's go."

~

"Ah! Easy!" Matt's breath is punched out of him as Frank shoves him back against the alley wall almost as hard as they had dealt with the three idiots who had decided to try and attack a woman walking home on her own in Hell's Kitchen at night. His hands are locked onto his shoulders like he might try to escape, his body pushed up close against his own, Matt's thigh is wedged in-between his. "If you wait we can do this at home y'know." Matt tries.

Frank isn't for listening. "Ain't waitin'. Time's up. If you don't fucking let me touch you now I'm gonna-"

Matt grits his teeth, hissing through them sharply for the way Frank's so worked up after only a week of forced abstinence. He can't wait for home even though it's just around the corner. This is happening now.

"Fuck-" Matt yelps as Frank attacks his jaw with his mouth, teeth nipping with one part violence, three parts desperation. His hands are everywhere, yanking at the zip of his pants and loosening his belt, slipping impatiently down between the rough fabric and his skin to feel his half hard cock. Frank rucks up the hem of Matt's black shirt, fingers rough and possessive as they travel up over his abs and pecs, his mouth following them as he bends down to lick, suck and mark what's his.

Matt's panting hard already, Frank knows where every single button is, and he doesn't just push it, he jams it in till it sticks and he's thrumming and overcome with sensation.

"Makin' me beg," Frank's voice is gruff and low and goes straight to Matt's cock. "Fuck that shit. You're gonna beg for me now, ain't that right baby?" He tells him as he pushes down his own pants and grabs both of their cocks together and starts stroking.

Matt moans so beautifully, head tilted back against the wall, his mask still on, lips kiss-bitten and swollen pink like a pussy. Frank devours him, licking along Matt's lower lip before he bites down on it, grunting as he keeps working his hand up and down.

"Shit, Frank, fuck!" Matt whines and Frank's back in his happy place watching and feeling him unfold beneath him.

"Yeah pretty boy, you thought you had all the control didn't ya?" He chuckles darkly, allowing himself his own noise of pleasure as Matt leaks a stream of precum from his tip.

"Yeah, yeah that's it, you fuckin' missed this too huh?" He circles his thumb over and under the head of Matt's wet cock drawing a weak and frustrated groan from deep in his throat.

Matt reaches and cups behind Frank's head, his fingers grazing the short hairs at the base of his skull. "Stop with the teasing and just fucking kiss me."

He pulls him in, smashing their mouths together, tongues together, hot and needy like it's been years rather than weeks since they'd touched one another.

Frank moans into Matt's mouth, his fist moving faster, feeling Matt's thighs grip around his own tighter, shaking with how close he is to going off. The fingers of Matt's other hand clutch and squeeze at the firmness of Frank's ass under his half-pulled down pants, and Frank jerks as he feels a finger teasing near his hole.

"God damn it Red, shit… oh shi-"

He erupts, grunting hard and long as spurts of come spill over his hand. The force of his climax almost has his legs giving out from underneath him but Matt holds onto him as he ruts his own hips up, his cock sliding easily between Frank's in the come-slick grip of his fist.

Then the hot, wet seal of Frank's mouth is around Matt's cock before he realises what's happening. Frank's sunk down to his knees, his own cock still hard, his hand encircling the base and lapping at him. He drags his fingers up and over his own balls as he slowly starts jerking himself off again, somehow not fully spent.

"Jesus, Frank…" Matt murmurs with incredulity.

Frank just keeps on sucking him off, the taste and smell and sounds he's making are everything he's been craving for the past week. Matt moans out his pleasure quickly, coming hard over Frank's tongue and down his throat as he swallows and sucks, wringing him out completely. It drives him to an easy warm and syrupy second orgasm that seems to last and last.

"Christ," Frank rumbles, grasping at Matt's pants and pulling them back up as he slowly gets back to his feet, and tucks himself away. "You never, ever get to do that to me again."

Matt breaks into breathless laughter, completely wrecked as Frank then curls his fingers under Matt's scruffy chin and gives him a filthy kiss.

"Are you kidding me?" Matt grins as he nudges Frank's cheek with his nose. "You've just made me wanna do it more."

[rebouks]

Okay, so I'm being completely self-indulgent here but I went on a little foray and dug up a load of old posts n' such to go thru Wyatt's journey n' pick out some important moments/juicy tidbits so uh.. here it is if you're interested 😆

Major Somnium spoilers if you haven't read it yet tho so be warned...

The first hint of genuine emotion/doubt we see cross Wyatt's face, and it's about his father.. hmmmmm, also to be noted is that even if he did up sticks n' go to work with Ash, he wouldn't have been free of anything, least of all his father's judgement!

The infamous Silas scene, yikes.. two things here, anytime he mentions it, it's not Wyatt's reach, always Arturo's! Like Oscar said recently, he doesn't have any connections now that he's gone (and Ashton, so.. oops) Second of all, Bruno DID understand.. which is interesting. Wyatt's family may not have been any relation to Bruno by blood, but they were still his found family for a long time and he n' Wyatt didn't much care for each other either, but they knew one another pretty well (what they showed each other anyway aha..) So yeah, he didn't LIKE it, but he UNDERSTOOD.. much to Ivan's dismay 🙈

Wyatt pretty much admits here that he's pretending his way through life.. which is SUPER fun to look back on, 'cause we all took him at face value here, but who's to say it wasn't just another act? 🤷‍♂️ He learnt to look at the world through calculated logic at a very young age.. and he's kinda right, if you observe everything & everyone else from a neutral standpoint, it's pretty interesting what you can see that you might've missed if you were too angry, sad etc.. to notice...

Did anyone believe Wyatt when he said he would leave Joslyn's kids out of it? 'Cause he was telling the truth.. maybe she should'a called his bluff. An easy bargaining chip, never to be played.

After learning of Oscar's plan, Wyatt decides to help him.. why? I don't think he's sure at this point, he just knew he'd had enough of his father's disrespect and wanted to fuck him over.

This is suuuper interesting, mostly because of Bruno's "no".. he's a bit of a hypocrite ngl, cos he knew more than Wyatt, and for longer, that what he, Artie n' co. were up to was wrong, yet he stuck with them, protected them and continued to work for them anyway. The difference between them tho, is that Arturo respected and trusted Bruno enough that he would've let him leave if he wanted to, but he didn't.. and Wyatt never had that luxury ⚆_⚆

In this scene we (I think?) first got a glimpse into Wyatt's brain, and I particularly like this part...

Although he wanted to prove to Arturo that he had been right, he knew he couldn’t risk it. Doing so would only reveal his own betrayal. It should have been satisfying, but Wyatt could already feel himself shrinking under his father’s cold, piercing gaze as he realised his own son had deceived him so immeasurably. He didn’t need to know; his demise would be satisfying enough, it had to be.

Simply because as it turned out, it wasn't satisfying at all.. and Arturo was already well aware of his own son's involvement at this point, double yikes.

So everything's gone to shit but Wyatt/Darien are still sitting pretty with Ashton.. but why is it sad boi hours? Why doesn't it feel right? Hmmmmm.. I like this scene because Wyatt's pretty much lost his whole family and yet.. is he sad? He doesn't think so, not really. It's kinda the start of him "waking up" so to speak, with no one left to live "for" and no one to impress, please or serve he's lost at sea! It's fun, because honestly at this point he could have slotted neatly into life in Del Sol. He could've worked with Ash, business as usual, new connections and protections, lotsa women, lotsa money and power..... and yet.. it doesn't feel right? 🤔 HMMMMMMMMMMM

Thanks to Brynn's help, Wyatt finally comes face to face with the reality of his actions. It's interesting for so many reasons.. first of all, he'd always kept the details at bay, 'cause that's what he was used to, what was easier, what he was taught to do.. business isn't personal, right Pookie? 🙈 and Ashton hadn't exactly told the whole truth either, making out like the girls would work for him (which ig they would in a way, at least some of em.. but it's definitely worse than Wyatt assumed, which I think can show how naive he could still be sometimes) but with no daddy around to answer to/impress, and no one left to pretend to, Wyatt suddenly NEEDED to know and there was no one left to persuade him otherwise.

Love this scene.. Wyatt's still a little demented isn't he, taking sadistic pleasure in fucking someone over, but at least this time he's on the right fkin side. Look at that smirk.. ohhh Ashton you are fucked, but please enjoy your sauna whilst you can 😁

So it's been a few years at this point and Wyatt's had a hell of a lot of time to think, and a lot of distance from his old life. He doesn't really know who he is at the moment, but he's kinda learning to just BE instead of pretending all the time.. kinda scary, tho a little less so when you've adopted a cute old neighbour who invades your space with his genuine care and good advice. Something Wyatt's definitely not used to, but he doesn't completely hate it.

Not only does bumping into Brynn again make Wyatt realise how grateful he was for her help, but it also kinda forces him to stop ignoring his past. Her visit and their brief time spent together really made him start looking back at his old life n' tryna figure out how it fit into his new one. He still has no idea who he is or who he should be and it's particularly disconcerting to him how comfortable Brynn is around him, given what she knows...

He'd just about managed to keep it at bay until this point, but it's time for an existential crisis 🤸‍♀️

Ahhh baba Ichi is so kind 😭 would he still be so keen to help Wyatt if he knew about his past? Who knows.. but he sees someone struggling and he wants to help! I think it's interesting that Wyatt trusts him/likes him enough at this point to actually admit his doubts/feelings, which is more than he'd ever done before. He might not see it yet, but it's still progress.

Brynn's back, and she's about to fuck Wyatt's shit up (in the best way).. I love how he's been so wrapped up in his own misadventures that he hadn't even stopped to think about hers. If we're gonna look at things in black and white (which we don't do here but just bear with) they're both "bad" people who've done terrible things and made terrible decisions; driven by necessity, both perceived and literal. They've taken lives without regret, stolen from people who didn't deserve it, fucked people over for their own survival or for revenge ETC ETC.. and yet, Brynn knows she's not black and white, she knows she's still capable of being a good person and she can see it in him too, even if he's like ??? about it himself.

Wyatt not only admits his feelings to himself, but to Brynn too.. and goes against what HE wants n' agrees to her wishes instead, putting someone else first for like.. the first time EVER 😳

Though he was glad to know the truth, Wyatt was less than thrilled with Brynn’s plan; but she craved true freedom, and after everything she’d endured – in part due to his own transgressions – he figured he owed her as much.

What sorcery is this?!

Wyatt's not great with empathy or at putting himself in others shoes, but I loved this scene with him n' Oscar because now he's actually been forced into Oscar's well worn vans and he had no choice but to confront his previous decisions head on.. he did NOT like his own medicine and I think it's the first time he properly felt regret/guilt.. super important discovery.

Ahh the crux of the issue, daddy issues.. 😅 I'm not saying Wyatt didn't have free will or the chance to idk NOT partake in the family "bidness" but idk, he was indoctrinated into that life since birth. The fact that he eventually made it this far and didn't go totally insane in the process is still kinda impressive.

We don't have to forgive him, Brynn hasn't, and won't.. but people are grey and there's hope things will be different in the future. I love how much these two have been through in life, yet still managed to SOMEHOW end up with a second chance/a way to be & do better. Idk I think it's awesome (disagree with me if u want idc ahahakjsdksj) and I especially love that they literally know almost every nasty detail about each other but still perceive the other as "good" despite those details.. ough

With a dead dad (yay), plenty of distance, a lot of time and some forced introspection not only from himself but Brynn, Oscar, etc.. and ELLIS, Wyatt finally broke in the best way possible. It'll take time and it'll still be shit at times but now that everything's outta the bottle maybe he can piece everything together again. I especially love this part..

The moment Ellis had made his way into the world, something deep inside Wyatt’s soul had shattered, breaking into a million tiny pieces that pricked his heart with every shred of hurt, regret, and stifled guilt he’d ever buried within its previously impenetrable depths. Try as he might, the tears refused to cease.

I think it was easy to believe that Wyatt was a psychopath (that was the point) but we only believed it with such conviction because HE did too. I think he's relieved to finally learn that that's NOT the case, even if it's scary af tryna figure out who he is from scratch.. but hey, he has a pretty good reason too now. Being the dad he wished he had... ;-;

Anyway.. thanks for coming to my pointless, long ass, self-indulgent TED talk, if you read all this please take a cookie on the way out and know that ily muchly 🖤🍪

[himbogiants]

A Lapse of Judgement

Felt like making a one shot!

Also just wanna say, I've been watching Castlevania, Alistar is very much inspired by Alucard

Anyways, Giant Angel, tiny demon :))

Warnings: Language I guess? Mentions of depression, fear of dying. Angsty and fearplay.

If you like this please like and let me know what you think! I love reading what others have to say <3 enjoy!

In her humble opinion Luciel wasn't doing anything wrong- ok no, that's a lie, but still she was only doing her job! Being a demon was hard work, especially when you were a lower class. She was just thankful she had her wings because she couldn't possibly imagine trying to traverse the human realm without them, trying to reach their ears just to whisper some corrupt ideas into them would be such a pain. More than it already was!

It was tough, but at the very least the humans couldn't see her so there wasn't really any stopping her except whenever procrastination kicked in. Well..that wouldn't be true either.

There were ways to stop her.

And all of them came in the form of Angels.

Self righteous perfect little Angels. Except they weren't little at all! Given their 'holy' nature they were all the same height as a middle class demon, or human. And might she add incredibly annoying! Because even when casting a fellow demon aside they always tried to be so moral and just about it. She for one thought they were a bunch of sad sour souls. What was the point in living a mortal life if you didn't get to cause a little mischief while you had the chance? You know, fun?!

But no. For every wicked whisper, they'd always counter, shunning out the darkness, much to the humans obliviousness.

Luciel had dealt with only a handful of them, possibly less. They never really paid her any mind, more than just a glare of disapproval anyways. Besides they were far more focused on putting a stop to her more powerful coworkers- if they could even be called that. Demons never exactly worked together.

In some ways she was glad to be at the rank she was, the most an Angel could do to her was shoo her off. They didn't attempt anything else. And she was content with that way of things, bothersome yes, but nothing she couldn't live with.

Or so she thought, until Alistar anyhow.

The little demon (quite literally) had been taunting a simple human named Dave- if she was correct. Poor precious Dave, and his sunken eyes. Perhaps she was feeding his anxiety a little too much. But it was quite fun to watch! So she'd continue to egg him on- no matter how many anxiety pills her swallowed.

She laughed in her mirth, going off to see another human deciding it may be time to give old Dave some time out. She flew through above crowds, she was in a city today. She never did bother learning names of locations for she did jump or rather fly around pretty frequently.

The sun was shining and the flowers were blooming- not her preference in weather by any means but perhaps that was the demon in her. All in all it was looking to be a successful day.

She stopped mid flight and floated above the colossal crowds, all impatient to get to the next place sprinkled with remnants of anger, addictions, drunkards, and much more. Wherever the city was it was looking to be a delightful place!

She scanned around before selecting a new target. Baggy eyes, tired expression, possible depression oh yes now this was perfect.

She flew after him thrilled by the chase- and the mere thought of a new client!

Up the stairs through a washed out apartment complex, past the many doors before alas, she caught up just as he walked in and shut the door.

She clapped her hands together, looking around the dingy little complex. It was still clean (odd, he couldn't take care of his own mind, yet his house was unbelievably clean. A possible touch of OCD?)

He walked further in, coming into the kitchen. She spotted them instantly, pills all lined up. Bingo, she was on the money with this one.

Then to his bedroom, he slumped down and switched on his computer, seemingly worn out even though the day was only beginning and just about to get a whole lot more exciting.

She landed on his shoulder, holding onto his collar and taking a breath, so many possibilities! Now, more importantly, what to say?

She settled with the obvious, time to corrupt his self worth!

Though she never got to do that. She had just steadied herself and headed for his ear, when a great hand burst in from seemingly nowhere, and trapped her tightly in a fist.

The breath was forcefully taken out of her as the hand squeezed harsher. Then she cried out at an instant heat. Something was burning! Searing hot! And it hurt. Heat shouldn't hurt Demons!! Nothing should!

"Aww..how pathetic"

She winced, an Angel of course but how?! Why was he even bothering?! She was only a lower cla-

The hand shifted and she was pulled around to a overbearing perspective. And what she was greeted with shook her to her core.

Not just an Angel. A Guardian Angel.

Fuck. No.

If normals Angels were so painfully just and morally correct in their hatred for demons, Guardian Angels amplified it ten fold. They too had wings and all in all looked fairly similar to any regular Angel, apart from their give away, an aura eclipsed their forms. Angels had beauty, but these ones were a new level, porcelain like skin, bright shining golden eyes, eyes that currently bore into her with nothing but repulsion. Angels hated Demons. But Guardians? They loathed them.

Not only that, but the worst aspect, they had the power to wipe any level of demon out, which is what made them so incredibly dangerous.

They could make demons writhe and scream for hours on end, possibly more than any damnation in hell ever could. And now one had her in his grasp. And he looked very pissed.

He lifted her to eye level, as she swallowed, tears beginning to brim at the corner of her eyes.

"A lowly little lower class hmm?"

His other hand appeared out of the blue and it made her yelp. The size difference had never bothered her before. Ever. She had grown so used to it, so why was she so terrified of it now?

The impossibly large hand came into contact and with one sharp nail he pushed her hair out of her eyes meeting her gaze. He smirked.

The Guardian Angel smirked. Angels didn't smirk, they didn't taunt nor tease. They done their duty and left. But this was new. And mortifying. He seemed to watch her as he pinned her wings painfully to her back. Despite the security of flight the drop below was still nerve enduring.

He brought her closer, right before his burning pupils, as the heat slicing through her worsened. He took in a deep breath and chuckled, his exhale brushing against her skin.

"Scared?"

Scared? Scared?! She had never known fear. A demon never felt scared!, but it seemed today was a day for new experiences. Here she was, dying out in a fist bigger than herself. Fear was her newest foe. Fear was what drove her to nod in response. Just as he had put it. Pathetic.

He sneered, seemingly finding this only delightful.

"Good. You should be"

And from there, everything felt raw..and white. At least the pain did anyways. She let out a howling cry, a piercing shriek. She noticed her arms, they were cracking .

She..she was dying.

A new wave of the meaning washed over this situation as did fright. Oh Satan..what..what happened to an Demon in death? She wasn't even a living soul? Was there more beyond this?! Was this it?! Panic seized her and finally she understood. Was this the type of thoughts she instilled on humanity? The self doubting, the fear. What lay awaiting in the foggy unknown?

She was speaking before she could stop herself.

"PLEASE. PLEASE I BEG OF YOU" She writhed.

The Guardian Angels eyes lay still, as he consumed her every wail.

"PLEASE. I- I DONT WANT TO DIE. IM SORRY! PLEASE STOP PLEASE"

Her breaths became laboured and tight, the crackled fractured up her arms and legs, getting closer and closer to her heart.

She wasn't ready to die.

A small tear fell from her cheeks and ricocheted off his hand.

She took one final gasp and then it all stopped.

The hand loosened and opened, as she collapsed in on his palm panting, heaving, shaking like a crisp little leaf.

She grasped her chest tightly as she softly began to sob, her ruffled wings twitched in pain, as they were freed from their constraints.

A warm voice breezed over her, she was closer to his mouth she reckoned.

"In all my lifetime, in all my training. I have never once seen a Demon apologise for their ways. Nonetheless cry. In eradication, many have felt fear. But nothing to this extent. Yet..here you are."

She was quivering as her curled up form hitched at his words. Her cracks were fading. He was letting her live..or so she hoped.

She unfurled slowly, looking up to meet his impossibly large eyes. He was so close.

"A-and I, have never witnessed an Angel who expelled violence"

A small smile tugged at his lips.

"Well, I for one, am not just an Angel, which I suppose you have already taken note off. And never having experienced such violent nature hmm? Must be the low level in you."

Her eyes furrowed as she died them.

"Most Angels I've met don't give me a second glance. I hadn't even done anything yet!"

It was his turn to glare, though she had noticed the venom was fading, replaced by a morbid curiosity. She found herself despising being a Guardians object of interest.

"Yes.. nothing yet. You had every intent on making this man's life a living hell and all for your own gain."

She tried to stand with her fury but pain riffled through causing her to stagger back. The Angel apparently having noticed used his finger from his other hand to curl around her miniscule waist and steady her out, he carefully sat her back down, going easy on her wings, he must have noticed their damage then. She couldn't exactly ignore the fascination lurking in his pupils either.

"Don't try and move. You'll make this harder on yourself, I was intending on killing you after all."

She laughed coldly as she folded her arms across her chest.

"And what. You're not gonna do that anymore huh? I was only doing my damn job!"

The Angel rolled his eyes and poked at her lightly with the same finger.

"As was I. Demons are a plague on humanity, which must be stopped at all costs."

She snarled at this. There it was. The self righteousness

"Well you're no blessing either, you psychopath"

Expectations of the Angels anger to give way were blocked as he could only chuckle deeply once more, his finger beginning to mess with her small body.

"You'll find that I am, quite literally, a blessing. Though perhaps I went a smidge too harsh. You're a tiny little thing, aren't you? I must admit, I've never actually seen a lower class. I'm usually left dealing with your counterparts."

It was her turn to roll her eyes at this. Though at his belittling of her ranking she felt a small spark of rage. She pushed the finger aside, hissing in pain as she weakly pointed up at the gargantuan glowing man.

"H-How dare you!? Fuck you-" She went to stand once more only to feel a shock in her wing, she yelped and let loose a pitiful whisper.

She did not miss the wince in the Angels features, as well as a hint of guilt. Guilt..for hurting a demon..hurting her? Carefully this time he brought his full hand, gently cupping behind her, only to stroke her wings in a soft and calming manner.

"Calm down, you need to stop fighting. The scorches are still wearing off."

She hated that she found herself leaning into the touch, sending a feeling of anxiety to coarse through her. It had only been five minutes and already this Angel was corrupting her mind as well as setting free butterflies that attacked her stomach.

"So..so you're not gonna kill me then?"

The Guardian fell still, his fingers freezing mid stroke.

"It's what must be done. It's what should be done, but you don't seem like a very real threat. So no..It goes against my inner judgement, but no. You will not perish today."

Luciel felt herself ease instantly with the news but met his eyes. They truly were a sight to behold.

"Thank you.."

A acknowledged this with another hesitant smile as he cocked his head, his long blond hair billowing over his shoulder.

"A Demon saying thank you? Lower classes must still posses manners then. But in any case, you're welcome."

She huffed "must you constantly mention my class? It's demeaning"

His head tilted further

"Curious little thing you are. I never knew Demons could feel insulted."

She turned her gaze away in embarrassment, fortifying her response without words, face turning red.

"Or to be oddly cute when angry."

She coughed at this and instantly facing down. His laugh bellowed around them as his hand shifted over her wings once more resuming their stroking, before he paused once more and set a huge finger beneath her chin, tilting her head upwards to meet his gaze.

"My name is Alistar"

He watched her expectedly as she cleared her throat baring her words, now impossibly soft, loosing their malice intent.

"Luciel"

His finger beneath her face left as it lay awaiting infront of her. Her face fell flat as realisation dawned, oh..a handshake.

She outstretched her arm, her hand falling on his finger tip, almost smaller than his nail. Unnerving to say the least.

"Y-you do realise I still have to do my job right, I can't just stop tormenting humans it's kinda what I'm assigned to do."

His eyes sharpened but only slightly, he sighed instead of sneering.

"You must do your duties and I must do mine. But I propose a bargain. You leave this human be, I've put enough work into keeping this place clean and keeping him alive. I don't condone it but as you must resume tormenting humans- from now it shall only be humans however, that show greed and evil. Rotten ideals. Seeing as demons don't care for humanity this shouldn't affect your work. Have at them. Leave the ones just trying to get by. Do this, and I promise to leave you be, as well as whenever we are together worklife shall go on pause. Do we have an understanding?"

She snapped her hand away from the finger with a raised brow meeting the golden eyes with suspicion

"Just what in all the layers of hell would make you think I would be insane enough to want to meet again?"

Alistar chuckled, his finger moving to twirl a lock of her hair, as he ruffled the rest, much to her dismay (which was met with an entertained grin.) The hand shifted as she got extremely close to his face making her freeze completely. He carefully placed her down on his shoulder and delighted in leaving her stranded, forcing her to sit as she could not yet fly.

"Because my little Demon, work can be awfully dull, and I am in need of some entertainment. A friend if you will."

Luciel felt her face flush, she didn't quite know what to say.. but his offer wasn't too..unappealing. But friendship of any sorts between their kind was forbidden, and if this Angel was willing to bend the rules he proved more interesting than the rest.

She'd take the gamble.

"You have a deal."

[kmze]

Thoughts on 4x13-4x23 TBH I had a lot of fun watching this half! I liked Elena’s no humanity arc and I enjoyed Silas fucking around with everyone and getting inside their heads. I also liked the detours to NYC and the storybook town Katherine compelled. There is some good foreshadowing this half and it was definitely much better than the first half of S4 (at least to me) The worst part was Bonnie’s storyline because of how tragically it ended and that she wasn’t in control of herself for much of it (this season was rough for her, might be her roughest). Also everyone appears to be dumber for plot reasons (or maybe it was just Damon being put in charge too often). Thoughts below!

4x13

The way Rebekah body slammed Elena CTFU!!

Klaus is such an asshole. As much as I have enjoyed some of the Klaus and Caroline scenes this season (my feelings about them have evolved, they are a necessary evil lol) stuff like this will always turn me off about them.

This Forwood scene is both touching and heartbreaking. Caroline reassuring Tyler he did the right thing because he freed the hybrids, and calling him a leader. They’re so great.

Again it's so cruel how the show is handling Beremy in regards to Bonnie. They came back together pretty quickly, which isn't a bad thing because it shows Jeremy has been pining this whole time (which your own fault my guy). However, they are just setting Bonnie up because he's gonna die! All those shirtless muscle grazes for nothing.

Rebekah dropping truth bombs though about how everyone should shut up about taking the moral high ground.

I like that Caroline always finds a way to stay alive! She knew she could use Klaus’ feelings for her against him to cure her, and she doesn’t have to give him anything in return. Adapt or die.

4x14

I am so tired of hearing about the cure already!

These beach/forest island scenes are making me zone out, I have no idea what's going on with this plot and very ready for it to end.

Nah Klaus was being way too nice and forgiving, Tyler and Caroline needed to be quicker figuring that out.

For someone who hates Elena she sure does talk about her ALL THE TIME JFC Rebekah, get a life.

But EL OH EL at Elena trying to get Stefan back to worshipping her by talking about his feelings on being human and when she asks why he didn't tell her he says "because it wasn't about you" BURN!

I like how you can subtly tell its Katherine when she goes to bite the hunter. Elena never would have done that.

Poor Forwood :(

Klaus is so fucking delusional “you know I would never hurt you” you just did less than 24 hours ago!

4x15

Stefan and Caroline have great silent communication.

Sometimes I read Reddit against my better judgement and for some reason they all believe Stefan and Bonnie should have happened. But I’m sorry after 3.5 seasons into this rewatch Stefan doesn’t give a flying fuck about Bonnie! Whatever “friendship” people think was “ignored” does not exist! He basically told Damon to leave her on that island with a 2000 year old psychic immortal because Damon needed to use the sire bond (!!!) on Elena. Bonnie doesn’t really fuck with him either, ever since Grams died she keeps her distance more than I noticed before. I think Bonnie recognizes how much Stefan is a lying liar who lies.

I think that’s why Bonnie ultimately got closer to Damon than she ever did to Stefan. Not that she trusts Damon or even really likes him until S6, but he at least shows her who he is all the time.

Damon and Caroline do not have good silent communication lol.

The crazypants Bonnie scenes are amusing in a scary way during all this heavy stuff.

This was one of the most emotional episodes of this show ever and I mean that in a good way. Nina deserved more accolades for her performance because it’s really heartbreaking, and she does a fantastic job of switching from extremely emotional to “emotionless” humanity off.

The scene where the trio walks out of the house while it’s burning you see Damon and Elena keep walking together but Stefan stays back a bit to look at the house and gets separated from the two of them. I felt like that was foreshadowing that Stefan is going to move on and essentially leave the triangle.

4x16

Wait did Elena just imply Caroline has seen her naked!

Damon’s list of things Klaus sucks at CTFU!

I feel like Stefan always has a vervain needle in his pocket LMFAO! Phone, keys, wallet, vervain needle. It will also endlessly amaze me how often vamps get roofied by vervain needles in broad daylight and just no one cares.

The way NH!Elena stops when she sees Stefan and Caroline dancing and stomps over GREATEST MOMENTS IN TVD HISTORY! I firmly believe this is the first time we see Stefan have his more than friendship feelings for Caroline (the ones that scared him and he pushed away) and actually act on them.

OMG am I ready for Rebekah to go away already!

Klaus and Hayley have ZERO chemistry wow. They definitely get better on TO but this was painful to watch.

Personally I would have told Stefan “not my problem” re: NH!Elena but Caroline is nicer than me. She’s also still kinda falls for his tricks at this point (wait until S6 my friends).

4x17

Love the 1977 flashback mostly for the use of Psycho Killer.

KLEFAROLINE! I can’t believe this is the only episode ever that they all shared scenes at the same time.

Isn’t Shane dead?!? I can’t follow this storyline at all man.

You can always tell how bad the show is treating Bonnie by how bad her wig/hair is and right now it's getting bad again. It looked great with the curtain bangs but the full bangs are a no-go. How this show managed to make Kat Graham look NOT gorgeous on purpose is it's most heinous crime.

I think we can all agree when Klaus said “don’t underestimate the allure of darkness Stefan, even the purest of hearts are drawn to it” it was him propositioning Stefan and Caroline to have a threesome.

I’m really enjoying the NYC scenes and the flashbacks. It’s giving a different feel to the show and I like it, almost the opposite of how it made me feel in the beginning of the season. Maybe we’re transitioning with Elena again but this time it's about having no humanity and hedonism so it's like grimmy, dark and sexy. Also change of scenery once in a while is a good thing.

Klaus pushing Stefan against the tree was way more sexual than the script intended me thinks. Then Caroline rushes over, and that’s why we only got one episode of this throuple, le sigh.

Damn NH!Damon was cold blooded in the flashback with Lexi, I forgot about that.

4x18

Katherine compelling a whole town reminds me of WandaVision now.

Stefan pointing out how incompetent Damon is lol always funny (and true).

NH!Elena intimidating Katherine is GOLD! Nina is having so much fun with this arc and I love that for her.

Damon and Stefan being like “ew” at Katherine and Elijah like they both haven’t slept with her AND her doppelgänger.

Honestly the vial the cure was in did not look like a 2000 year old vial so like again, morons. Damon for some reason thought Katherine was as stupid as him and hide it in the most obvious spot.

NH!Elena is right how fucking stupid is Elijah that he trusted Katherine or believes anything she says EVER. He's just as gullible as his sister.

I’m with Elijah honestly Klaus no one cares about you being tormented, you’re the worst and this is karma. I'm also with him in regards to Rebekah and her insisting on taking the cure, you wouldn't last one day without superpowers, you're just bored and need attention.

4x19

Caroline still got the better dress lol. I do love when she uses men's affections to get herself things.

Silas appearing as everyone was a good villain for this half. Gave everyone an opportunity to play something different, plus there’s always something scary about a shapeshifter especially one that can read your mind.

Bonnie going cray-cray again but even worse her hair and this dull dress WTF?! Like they gave her prom queen but at what cost! I hope Kat burned this wig once she was free from it.

I personally feel like the Steroline prom dance affects Stefan more than Caroline. She maybe feels a little tingle after they share a look but Stefan’s reaction is way more played up. He’s the one who lowers his head like they might kiss and then the breath he takes after. My heart. Love how this becomes such an important moment in their love story, especially for him. He mentions it in his speech about loving her changed his life, and oh yeah his friggin' wedding vows!

See another vervain needle! This guy!

I'm sorry but LMFAO at Klaus talking about humanity saying mockingly "why does this always happen to innocent people" because he's kinda right! Being human in this world would be super lame with all the supernatural power and knowledge they have.

Elijah knows there's a super-powerful immortal psychic who can impersonate people wondering around and he doesn't ask for even a little bit of clarifying information when "Rebekah" says she passed his test. Also he just believes she passed his test? HOW IS HE THIS GULLIBLE?!

4x20

The first scene cracks me up in retrospect like “we three are contractually obligated to be in all episodes so here’s some random dialogue to fill that” LMFAO

MARCEL <333 you beautiful sexy ass hell man, I shall always crackship you with Bonnie Boncel4lyfe

Elijah is just as bad as Stefan when it comes to his brother, like OMG just let that man GO! Some people just don’t want to be saved man.

The Klamille scene when they looking at the painting and discussing it is really nice (plus great song). I know technically he looked at art with Caro first but like Cami actually appreciates art and Caro couldn’t really care less beyond distracting him lol.

4x21

IDK if I can believe Caroline was valedictorian… I mean I don’t think she’s dumb or not determined enough to get it but there is no way she attended enough classes to get it. Sorry show I don’t believe you.

You know Caroline is moving up in the TVD food chain when Matt turns a dig about her from Rebekah into a compliment!

Matt being the trigger for Elena made sense, he got the biggest emotional reaction out of her when she first saw him in the woods. I don’t think Damon got any real emotional reaction out of her tbh, and Stefan got some with her jealousy over Caroline and when he compared her to Katherine. This just proves Matlena should have been endgame like I’ve always said!

4x22

Stefan definitely had Caroline babysitting Elena.

Sorry but I love how everyone doesn’t even entertain the idea Elena could kill Katherine. They are like she’s 500 years old and 500x smarter than you, you will die.

Lexi’s comments are great foreshadowing for Steroline. They are ambiguous enough that they don’t say Stefan has feelings for Caroline but they don’t deny it. Lexi definitely seems to think so though and she's known him for over 100 years so...

I know Katherine and Elena have tons of reasons to want each other dead but it felt like they played it up on purpose this episode and the next one to make them fight and give Katherine the cure. It’s not OOC or anything just feels more manufactured than it needed to be.

I can’t believe they killed Bonnie! I know it’s temporary but JFC she can’t catch a break, this was an awful season half for her. Fuck Julie and Dries.

4x23

I can’t believe they had Stefan graduate LMFAO zero people believe he attended more than 2 classes this whole year.

I like how the Klaroline scene in 4x23 and the Steroline scene in 6x22 work in tandem. I used to view it as a conflict but now I appreciate how they work so well for Caroline. Two hot powerful guys promising her their heart and she gets to choose which one whenever she wants since they both gave an open timeline. It girl behavior!

I don’t think I ever zone out more than when Damon and Elena make one of their yelling love declarations of toxicity. I will never understand their appeal.

Poor Stefan. I do feel a little bad but they did hint all season he was going to be the one to move on and he knew it too. Through a rewatch it’s easy to see the hints and foreshadowing. His scene with Damon where he says he’s “not not happy for you” is great too because that’s what matters to him more in the end.

Human Katherine! Such a great storyline excited for it!

HELLO MY SHADOW SELF

Lines that made me laugh:

Rebekah: You’re like Sherlock Holmes with brain damage (she's annoying but she is funny!)

Elena: You got Lexi’d! (CRYING I swear everyone is funnier without humanity)

Caroline: I don’t know if this is your new weird way of flirting, but it sucks. (her delivery was the best part)

[paramorearchived]

June 23, 2013

Transcript:

what's cooler than being cool?

..... being yourself. That's what.

I was just thinking the other day... Looking at random blogs, fashion sites, online zines... and I got sad. Mostly because I feel like a lot of the different subcultures that exist today, exist because at some point there was someone who felt like they didn't fit in. (Stay with me.)They had a movement of their own to live for. So they did and maybe at some later point, it caught on or somebody else felt like they could fight for those same things. Maybe it wasn't even a "fight", maybe it was just a way of living. Marching to the beat of their own drum. My Granny always told my sisters and I from a very young age... "You girls just march to a different beat". I didn't really get it back then and honestly, I'm glad I didn't because when I was that young I didn't see the point in pointing out people's differences. It was just a way of living. Still is, I suppose. Or at least, I hope.

I do get it though and I see it in other people now... mostly young people. My sisters, for sure. But in a lot of our fans, as well. Again, mostly in the younger ones. Cause when we're just young enough, we're not yet jaded or bothered by what's "cool". We're not quite as worried about fitting into some of society's little cliques or sub-genres of human beings. So, we just do whatever comes naturally to us. Funny how there's an entire part of our culture completely obsessed with youth and beauty - yet we forget the most essential ingredient to youthfulness is that clean slate, non-judgemental, wide-eyed curiosity. You can't be sold any of that.

Anyway, I got sad because within these subcultures and an entirely new breed of "too-cool kids"... there are likely some people who, at some point, didn't fit in, weren't "normal", and probably needed somewhere to go to feel like they could fully express themselves. I see it everywhere. These are the nerds from junior high that got bullied everyday but then ended up in a band and now they've turned their old loser status into a trophy of pretentiousness to beat everyone over the head with. The guys and girls who wouldn't be caught dead in a regular old mall where they once probably got made fun of for what they were wearing... but are now wearing unique and fun brands like UNIF or Lazy Oaf (which, to be extra clear, I love) and calling everyone else "basic". I'm just saying, why doesn't the cycle end with the people who should've learned their lesson? Why aren't the once regarded weirdos and freaks raising up a new generation of people who are more self-assured in their individuality? Why does it seem like some of the strange ones found their bit of success and now look down on anyone else who doesn't look, think, or have the way they do? It's like seniors who constantly give sophomores a hard time as if they weren't just sophomores themselves like 3 years ago. I was not the most popular person in school. And even when I did have friends I still felt a bit like a weirdo. I'm not threatened by that... It's something that I hope to encourage other people with. That's a huge part of the message behind Paramore. To lift up the people who feel ashamed that they're different. To tell them that that's probably the coolest part about them.

At this very moment, at 24 years old, sitting here in sweats and looking/feeling utterly disastrous (hey, i got my rights)... I have to say, I'm really proud that as a kid I never felt like I fit in with the popular crowd. And as an adult, I don't feel like I fit in with the self-righteously uncool crowd either. Honestly, it's nice to be on a real quest to just be me everyday. No matter what. It doesn't matter if I'm in Silverlake, CA - land of the upturned noses - or back home in Nashville. Doesn't matter if we're on a red carpet. I guess I just couldn't care less. I'm not saying it's always easy but it's always worth it to stay true to you.

If anything, this could be a Back To The Future type of warning, to anybody who cares enough about this post, that high school ends but it never actually ends. There will still be people around who try to point at you and laugh. Who think you're not on some tip like they are. Who feel like their job, their shoes, their money, their boyfriend or girlfriend, their lifestyle ... is on some level that you haven't even ever heard of. The truth is that no one else could live your life. Nobody else - man or woman - could wake up and put on your shoes in the morning. Nobody else could pull it off. So own that. Cool is a lie. Cool doesn't matter and it never did. Merely perception.

In conclusion, you are your own torch carrier. Don't let anybody steal your light. Wear what you want. Think how you want. Challenge normal. And yes, even challenge what's "cool".

In total conclusion... We're really excited to be posting the video for "Anklebiters" in a couple of days. This is not an official single release, this is just a video we wanted to have done because of what the song has come to mean for our band. Thanks to all the people who came up on stage with us over the last tour and a half and sang it with us. This song is our way of contributing to the art of self-love and self-acceptance, no matter the odds.

We love you guys and we love you most when you're being yourself.

xxxxx h

[carriagelamp]

My internet died for about half a week this month, so I had a really peaceful few days where I had an enforced excuse to do nothing but relax and read when I got home from work. It was incredibly zen and I really sank into my books that week.

The Call of the Wild

A classic novel that I’ve always meant to read. I was sick and headachy this month and decided that this was the perfect sort of relaxing, narratively rich book to listen to. I really enjoyed it, would recommend. It follows a dog named Buck who’s snatched from his home in southern California and is shipped off to work as a sled dog in the Yukon, where a need for strong dogs to help transport goods over the snow and ice makes them very valuable. Buck has to learn how to survive in this harsh environment as everything from the weather, his fellows dogs, and his human masters seem to fight against him.

A Complicated Love Story Set In Space // How To Bite Your Neighbour and Win A Wager

Putting these two together because my experience with them was pretty similar. For both I was intrigued by the title, got them from the library on a whim, and didn’t really mesh with either. I didn’t really get far enough in either to give much of a review, they just didn’t vibe. A Complicated Love Story Set In Space set up a scenario that didn’t really interest me — not surprising, I’m picky about my scifi — and How To Bite Your Neighbour and Win A Wager just had an… odd writing style to it. It very much feels like it’s main goal is to be a kinda horny about vampires which, if that’s what you want, all the power to you, but it’s wasn't doing it for me. I had to suspend way too much disbelief for the scenario to function.

Indiana Jones and the Cup of the Vampire // Indiana Jones and the Curse of Horror Island

A pair of choose your own adventure books I found at a used book sale. I picked them up out of sheer amusement, and they were basically what I expected and paid for: cheesy 1980s adventure stories with Indiana Jones as a nominal protagonist. They were both varying degrees of improbable, ridiculous, and racist so YMMV but they were fun to play with while I was down and out on the internet front.

The Kootenay Kidnapper

Eric Wilson is a classic Canadian author who writes children’s mystery/thriller novels. I’ve never read him before and decided to remedy that. At this point I choose to withhold judgement until I read another… I’m not sure how I felt about The Kootenay Kidnapper. It had some nice descriptive language, successfully raised the tension from time to time and made me really try to piece together who the villain was, but then also had some strange dead zones as well. The whole thing read a bit like a 1990s stranger danger PSA which was also… weirdly nostalgic? But also just weird. Would try another.

Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation comic v3

I continue to be a MDZS simp, this is not news. 

The Radium Girls

I don’t read much nonfiction, but this book was so narrative in its writing that I seriously couldn’t put it down. Kate Moore took a historical event (the girls that were paid to paint watch dials with radium paint in the early 1900s) that had been written about in scientific and legal styles, and instead retells it with a primary focus on the girls themselves. You follow a variety of real life women over the decades and learn about the all the machinations that went into them being horrifically poisoned by radium, and how that changed the very foundation of American workplace safety. Super engaging, unspeakably appalling.

Scott Pilgrim v1/2

My brother and I started watching Scott Pilgrim Takes Off on Netflix and… wow, it is not what either of us was expecting but we are loving it. We’ve both been big Scott Pilgrim fans since the naughts. Since I haven’t reread the series in years I decided I should pick it up to help notice the differences between the original series and this new show — I have the big, coloured omnibus version, so I reread the first collection of stories which amounts to volume 1 and 2 of the original. 

Scott Pilgrim is one of those comics that if you’ve somehow never read then you really need to, it’s one of my all-time favourites. It’s a story about Scott Pilgrim, a young adult who’s awkwardly trying to figure himself out, combining a coming-of-age slice-of-life with magical realism. The mysterious girl he meets, Ramona Flowers, can travel a subspace highway through Scott’s dreams — of course, don’t they teach Canadians how to do that? Huh, maybe it’s an American thing. Scott is known to be the best fighter in the province and when he defeats an enemy they explode into a pile of coins. One of the Evil Exes has Vegan Powers, and another can summon demonic back up dancers. This story just does whatever the fuck it likes and I adore it for that.

Heaven Official's Blessing v3/4

I continue to be TGCF simp, this is not— seriously, the series continues to be excellent and I only get more and more invested in not just Xie Lian and Hua Cheng, but also in the side characters that are introduced. I was thrilled to have Shi Qingxuan become a bigger player in book 4, and really liked the whole plot with the Venerable of Empty Words and Black Water. Please, someone, help this guy…

The Wind in the Willows

Another classic I had never read that I decided to pick up. It was excellent, I can see why it’s stayed so beloved over the years. Though I love a good cute-animals-in-lil-clothes-living-cute-lil-lives story, so I was an easy sell. It was much more tame than the likes of Redwall, but had a bit more going on than the likes of Brambly Hedge — it keeps you very engaged, but never raises the stakes so high that it stops feeling light and comforting. It is essentially a collection of stories that follow Mole and Rat, a pair of friends that live together on the river, through the seasons and the various misadventures they and their friends go on.

The Woman They Could Not Silence

Since I liked The Radium Girls I decided to pick up another one of Kate Moore’s books. This one follows a woman who was intentionally committed to an insane asylum by her husband, purely because she was intelligent and outspoken, refusing to be cowed to his opinions or beliefs. This story details her time in the insane asylum, the abuses that the patients suffered, and how she came to fight the laws that allowed for such abuses to be perpetuated in the first place. A fascinating read about a historical figure I had never heard about before.

[alexissara]

Looking back at the art I was most looking forward to for 2023.

So last year I made a post about all the art I was excited about going into 2023. I want to look back at this list and quickly talk about what I thought about all the art I was most hype about going into a new year.

Fire Emblem Engage: I wrote two different reviews one for the main game and one for the DLC. I've also written a one year later impressions on it. Over time I have come to like the game less and less to the point in which I basically just like the lesbians from the dessert. It's a game that every time I think about it I like it less even when I actively try and be positive I find more things I dislike. It is still a Fire Emblem game so not the worst way to spend time but I'd rather play a fan game, rom hack or an older game in the series.

Arcane Season 2: Didn't happen, 2024 is when we are told to expect to see more so we'll see.

Assorted Entanglements: Never read it, I had a chance to pick it up but I ultimately went with another manga over it.

Super Lesbian Animal RPG: Still playing it ever so slowly, I really like it, I think it's cute but I want to see the whole game before I cast a judgement and I guess that I haven't beat it yet could say something.

The Magical Revolution of the Reincarnated Princess and the Genius Young Lady: I fucking loved this anime so much, one of my top animes of all time, a true master piece to me, I am floored by it, I wish there was an English dub for easier viewing fun but otherwise I mean this really took my breath away.

Asumi-chan is Interested in Lesbian Brothels!: I've read all the current volumes now, it's a personal favorite series, I really love it, it's so much funnier and more charming and wholesome then I expected. It's sometimes sexy but mostly I just enjoy Asumi as a character and following her journey.

Street Fighter 6: Really loved this game, it was great, I had a great time in World Tour Mode but I do think the game was lacking in a lot of areas like more freedom with your avatar for more modes and the monetization is right under MK for worst monetization in a fighting game of all time.

Gwitch Season 2: Not nearly as good as season 1, It's still good but it is a big downgrade of boring forced drama and wasted character potential along with rushed plot elements. Still, the animation is great, the characters are still good, and everything is nice.

Walk With The Living 2: Only played a little bit of it, I'd like to play more but I wasn't totally gripped by it. It's cute but I hit a map that I really couldn't beat and I wish it had more in the way of sounds effects to give some impact to the actions.

I'm In Love With The Villainess [Anime]: A really great time, I mean I really loved every episode and I just wish they either confirmed a season 2 right away or made the pacing more tight. The show was still funny and cute and fun and charming and overall I had a great time watching it with multiple of my partners and had no problem rewatching on the same day where for many things I'd find that boring.

Granblue Fantasy Relink: DIdn't come out but I probably am not buying day one because the way steam users are getting fucked on in game gacha codes. The roster also looks far more pathetic than I had hoped for. This game moved from a must buy to a wait and see it go on sale type deal.

[queenharumiura]

[Never would happen, but i don't care] (Mukuro) kissing them to shut them up .

Taken from meme: [x] ||Accepting|| KEK, and that's why I said none of these are canon so just treat it like fun time~ glad you're taking me up on that lol First is a joke drabble.

Haru was talking nonstop like she does at times, and she had inadvertently been annoying Mukuro all this while. He asked her something about costumes, and as it's one of her major hobbies, she was excited to talk about it!

She was getting into all the technical parts of making a costume, and that's not what he was really interested in learning about. Haru had misunderstood in her excitement.

There was only one thing to do. Shove some chocolate into her face.

Haru was surprised for sure, but she wasn't going to waste the hershey kisses that she was so rudely bestowed. Chew chew chew.

-

KEK, now for the actual attempt to clearing the prompt. It wasn't stated who was doing the kissing, so I made the choice.

-

It wasn’t very often, but there were times that Haru would go on some missions, and they were normally recon-based. Sometimes, she’d be asked to infiltrate an area and scope out the place by acting like a regular civilian. It wasn’t hard when you thought of it was a vacation or something. It wasn’t often when she was paired off with another person- but she had reason to believe that it was simply because they secretly had someone tailing her to ensure her safety.

It was like they had no faith at all- rude. Anyways, the Vongola were tipped off to some girls going missing, to never be seen again. Investigations have led to all the women having something in common, that they had contact with a man who promised them that he may have a high paying job laid out for them. The girls would quit their jobs after talking to him, and all seemed fine at first until all contact with them would get cut off a few weeks afterwards.

Having a number of women go missing in such a way was obviously a concern.

That enough warranted the attention of the Vongola, and so they had no other choice than to ask one of the girls to scope the scene and maybe even be the bait. With the prospects of this mission taking weeks at a minimum to complete, many of the women affiliated with the Vongola were busy with their own missions. They couldn’t possibly be held up with a mission like this over a more crucial mission.

Not to mention that some just weren’t cut out for missions involving acting and appearing meek enough to be a prime target for this guy that targeted young women. Through a process of elimination, Haru was asked to take on the mission herself.

Honestly, even Haru initially had her reservations about assigning this to her. It wasn’t to say that she was utterly hopeless at acting… but she did have a temper. Haru wasn’t afraid to simply punch a pervert who had untoward intentions. Dr. Shamal was a common victim of her punches, and Haru will die on the hill that he deserves every punch she gives him.

She wasn’t entirely confident she wouldn’t immediately punch the guy if he did approach her out of righteous vindictiveness, but if she thought about how she needed to find out what had happened to the missing women, she could stay her fist for a brief moment.

What her mission details read, was that she was to somehow make contact with the man in question and find out as much as she could about him. If she could figure where all the other girls had gone, even better.

The true issue were the identities of most of the missing women. They either had no family, or were estranged from their own families, so it didn’t gain much traction for their going missing until now. The other troubling part of their identities were that many of the women had jobs like being a cabaret girl, or working in places like maid cafes.

That alone made Haru cast the judgement that the guy was a major pervert, because he only targeted women who worked in fields where you had to sell smiles a customer service and treat men like Kings.

Was she wrong? Absolutely not.

How they did it, she didn’t know, but after pulling some strings, Haru was given a job at a cabaret club as one of the girls who served drinks to customers. Her name at work was ‘Rumi-chan,’ and all the other workers had the understanding that her real name was ‘Hanako,’ an orphan girl who was struggling because of the debts her parents left her with.

As such, she had to settle for working at a cabaret club. She thought she was going to lose her mind from having to tolerate the perverts who flocked to the club on a nightly basis. If not for her target entering the club, Haru may have left the club after causing some chaos.

Alas… Haru could exercise restraint and patience for the greater good. It didn’t take long for her to catch the eye of the bastard after he’d heard from the other girls about how they had a new hire. They asked him to treat her well because she was struggling with debts.

Haru was sure they had good intentions… and for the sake of her mission, this worked out great! This ‘Muramasa’ was apparently some 2nd generation rich kid who liked to flaunt his money at all the clubs in this district, so they were possibly looking out for her.

You could get a hefty bonus if you served rich clients, after all.  

SIGH

Her poor blood pressure. It took every single fiber of her being to refrain from slapping him every time he touched her. It didn’t even matter how innocent a touch it could have been, she felt disgusted by even breathing the same air as a man who was suspected of trafficking women away.

Whenever she was given a break, Haru would always go outside to be away from the customers. She liked going on a small walk to escape from it all, clear her mind. It was a few days into her meeting Muramasa when she noticed that she was being tailed every time she went on break. (In her defense, she used to not be able to tell if someone was tailing her, but she’s improved! It took her a few days to notice, but she got around to it eventually! Give her some credit)

Anyways, it was evident that she was probably going to be the next target. Guess the next phase of the plan of being bait was going to run smoothly. How great. (Can you hint the sarcasm?)

Sad that even when on break she didn’t have the freedom to truly relax.

She feels someone’s gaze on her and she looks to the side to see a familiar face. What was Mukuro doing in this district? Maybe he had some business here? Was he looking for information? There were a few underground factions working here, like how some of the cabaret clubs had affiliations with the Yakuza. Maybe that’s how the Vongola managed to pull strings to get Haru a position.

The eye contact had gone for too long now that she thought about it. Ah! Did the ones tailing her notice that? Was that going to look suspicious? She quickly changes her pathing and she heads straight for him.

“Kyaa~ You’re back in town? It’s been so long!”

(No one look at her please, her pride is dying here with every step she takes!)

She reaches for him, guiding his face with her hands so she can steal a kiss.

Almost.

In truth, just at the last second, she placed her thumb in between their lips so they didn’t actually share a kiss.

She fears that she’d get in a lot of trouble if she stole a kiss from Rokudo Mukuro.

Just when she pulls away from the ‘kiss’ and she gives him a big hug next. “I’m on a mission, and I go by Rumi. Don’t ruin my cover.” She whispers. When she pulls away from the hug, she left a small note tucked onto the collar of his shirt. “If you could deliver that, I’d be grateful.” It was a note that she had to get delivered to any of the Vongola guardians.

“You’re so mean, why didn’t you say anything about you being in town again? Mou~ You’re so bad. Are you going to visit the club later?” Haru continues to act as though she was just talking to an old customer she knew.

(Surely that’d be enough to fool her trackers? QuQ)

“Ah, my break is almost over. I have to go back. You should visit again, okay? Bye~” With a playful wink (she’s only acting as her Rumi setting requires of her. Don’t judge her!) she trots off back to the club to resume work.

Someone save Haru, she doesn’t want to do this anymore! Hasn’t she suffered enough? Now someone she knows had to witness her acting. Excuse her as she’s mentally crying her life away.

[askfucktoyfelix]

So, weird question. (Sorry if the "Dear Abby" column isn't how you want to be used, lol. I'll try to steer clear of traumadumping.) I just got out of my first sexual relationship. It was more of a situationship, really – he said he wanted to be fwb, even though he knew I had a thing for him, and I'm aroace so him not wanting a Relationship ™ wasn't a real dealbreaker, but then he ignored the guidelines he agreed we should set up, ran over some of my boundaries, accused me of wanting to make things more romo than we'd agreed on even though He kept trying to up the ante with Me, etc. There were a lot of red flags, so even though I'm still really wounded by how it ended I'm not that surprised. But I think my unique aspec relationship to sex was the dealbreaker for him. I told him before we started that I was more into kink than any kind of sex, invested in power dynamics and control rather than the activity itself or anything to do with physical bodies, and he said that made perfect sense to him, but when we actually got started and I said the idea of him begging for my attention was hot because of what he'd do to get it rather than any kind of chemical/hormonal reaction to having a pretty boy on his knees for me, he got upset and said he thought I'd "actually liked him." He cut things off entirely with me not long after.

I know I'm better off without him, but being interested in sex as an esoteric activity rather than a physical one leaves me worried I'll never find anyone else. The purely text-based setup we had going on worked really well for me (got him off five times in a night once, that was fun) but he reacted so poorly to my being "disgusted" with him over just the Thought of sending audio I might not be comfortable hearing that I'm struggling to believe anyone could play with me and not secretly be wounded by my lack of "proper human response." There's gotta be people out there who aren't turned off by that, right? I've seen enough autistic tumblr sluts' blogs out here to know that the gently mocking, scientific-minded approach I seem to fall into gets Some people going, but as a certified Experienced Slut ™ yourself, I'd appreciate your confirmation.

First of all, being asked my advice is actually one of my very favorite things. I also find the concept of 'traumadumping' to be an exceedingly cruel response to people who are suffering. It's a concept that has set back mental illness and trauma acceptance back 30 years. (not that people cant have boundaries, but there's a big difference between 'sorry I cant handle this right now' and 'youre assaulting me with your trauma you asshole' BUT I DIGRESS) You're far from the first person I've heard of who entered into a fwb with someone, and got accused of wanting more romance...when I think the reality is likely that THEY wanted more romance and were unable to admit that to themselves. I'm sorry it sounds like you've been hurt by someone who lacked the self-understanding to realize how important it was to him that he be desired for his physicality. Since you put "disgusted" in quotes, I take that to mean that was his judgement of you and not reflective of your actual feelings? (It's alright either way, but how you go about exploring kink with people in the future will be a little different depending on if you do experience a disgust response or not.)

Either way: I can absolutely assure you that there are people who aren't turned off by the way you relate to sex. Not only that, but there are people who will strongly prefer that. There are people very much like you, and there are people who aren't like you at all but will find it even hotter that you are the way you are regardless.

[yey56]

Eagle Flies x Foreign Reader (Hispanic)

Summary: reader (female) is friends with eagle flies and part of the van Der Linde Gang.

Eagle flies decides to attack the us army with his people and the gang. When he's about to get shot, you receive the bullet for him...

(mentions of canary island culture: the jump of the herder)

You met Eagle Flies 4 years ago, it was pure fate that you got to know eachother. Nonetheless, your friendship started strangely at best.

You came from another country, your father had sent you to America trying to give you a better chance at life since there where no better options in your homeland.

He managed to get you into a job on a mansion on Saint Denis. But unluckily for you, this mansion was at the outskirts of the city, therefore easier target to robbers.

The men who robbed the house also took some servant hostages to either sell them or just have fun with them. In that group, they included you and a few maids.

You had seen them kill your coworkers so while they were sleeping and summoning all of your courage and will to live, you managed to kill one with a dagger and the other one with a gun you stole from the corpse. After that you run away.

Eagle Flies found you in the middle of the night while he was getting back to his tribe. You were bloodied, with an exhausted look, running as if your life depended on it. He didn't know how to react when he saw a girl his age running through the fields like a madwoman.

Against his better judgement he approached you. He was mounted on a horse so the moment the steps of the animal started getting louder you stopped, grabbing the gun you had just acquired.

Being a foreigner, an immigrant your English wasn't the best. You had only been in America for a year so you didn't really had time to properly learn the language, just some phrases and key words

Eagle Flies catched quicky on the language barrier so he started asking you several questions and you answered with incomplete phrases and with hand signs in an attempt to articulate the message.

"Hey! You can drop the gun I won't hurt you" he said trying to calm you. He looked right into your scared and frantic eyes and realised you must have scaped from something bad. "Are you ok? Do you need help?" He still didn't let his guard down, just in case.

"¿Que?" He heard you mumble "H-Help" you chocked out your voice cracking a bit but still trying to appear confident. "People- They! eh... Bad people!" you were trying to articulate a coherent phrase and communicate him the nightmare you just went through "I don't English-very little English " you were praying that he would catch on your message and luckily, he did.

"Hey hey, it's ok." Eagle Flies came down from his horse trying to reassure that you weren't going to be hurt by him. "Where do you live?" He talked slowly, making sure you at least got the important part of the message "Not here, not American" you replied

You were now much calmer. Even though a stranger was not a wise decision but this boy seemed nice enough and you had no better option.

Eagle Flies offered to take you to the nearest town and that's how you arrived to Valentine.

He wanted to pay for a room for you but you denied it, telling him that you were grateful.

Eagle Flies could not take you out of his head: your thick accent, your scared look, the way you looked like you were going to collapse.

It had been 5 months since he last saw you and he was already accepting that he would never see you again. Until one day, while he was coming back from hunting, he recognised you on the side of the path with a big stick in your hands and a flask tied to the stick.

You looked way better than the last time, sane. You recognised him and greeted him, seemingly happy to see him.

He stopped his horse to talk to you. Your english had improved a lot, you accent was still there but your sentences were more coherent and made some sense.

You presented yourself as Y/N, you explained him what happened that night and how grateful you were of having found him. In valentine you had been able to work and get some money and after a few months of hard work, you decided sedentary life was lot for you so taking your risks you used your saving to buy food and improve the gun you still had from the kidnap.

You sat on the grass of the forest and talked for hours.

"Why don't you have a horse? Valentines ones are very docile." Eagle Flies wondered why you were so insistent on waking, you had told him all of your travels have been made by foot and so far you had already visited both Strawberry and Rhodes.

"I enjoy the journey. I draw the landscapes, animals, plants... And that I don't know how to ride so I have to work with what I have" Your personality was more extroverted and friendly. "Is my stick and me against the world"

"And the gun" He added chuckling a little "And my gun" You replied laughing back.

"Right now I have to take this back to my people but if you come by here tomorrow by the morning I can teach you" He offered. The man didn't knew why was he so drawn to you. Your personality, the way you had adapted to your situation, your pretty voice.

Just as promised, the next morning he arrived at the same place. You came a little later, he saw you walking towards him from the top of an uneven hill. Instead of going down trough the path, you used the large stick you had to jump from the tops to the nearest flat surface until you reached the ground.

He was completely amazed by what you just did. Smitten even. He praised whatever you just did and admired the creative technique used to descend from the hill.

You explained that it was a technique used back in your home, the Herders jump. You offered your stick to him encouraging Eagle flies to try it himself. He failed to do it as effortlessly as you but still had fun trying.

He had brought his horse alone so after lending him the stick, you took the reins of the animal.

You learned quickly and that was something Eagle flies admired from you but of course there were still things to perfectionate. For example your absolute horrible ability to slow down, but hey! You will do it someday (he hopes)

Your friendship continued to develope and grow each passing day. Some weeks you were completely missing and later you would just reappear with new stories and little trinkets to give to him. At some point you started sending him letter telling him where would you go so he wouldn't worry so much.

One day Eagle Flies presented you to Paytah, his best friend and you actually got along very well. He was also curious about your sporadic journeys so now whenever you wrote to Eagle Flies, Paytah got send your rewards and a funny sketch of a silly animal.

After being made aware by your new friends the abusive situation they were in thanks to the army, you started getting directly involved in helping them.

You would take jobs as bounty hunting lower criminals or just cleaning tables at saloons so you could afford medicine and other essentials for them.

Eagle Flies always insisted on you not overworking yourself and tried to deny the money you were offering him but you were always so insistent. You just always needed the last word so it was useless to argue with you.

You sympathise with their situation, the crisis on your country had been caused by a war with the Unated States some years prior therefore you understood what lack of resources could course to a community.

He even presented you to his father as his dear friend (even Rains Fall knew that his boy had a huge fucking crush on you). You got along well with his father, he appreciated that his son had such a wise friend and well traveled friend. He also liked that you knew well the world around you, it helped you understand everything better.

(He was fully prepared to accept you into the family fr 😉)

Eagle Flies couldn't help himself, you were so curious, so full of live and so hungry for knowledge. You always had an explanation for things.

Trivial conversations such as how the silly new invention, the camera or cinema, worked; or maybe just why the higher classes were so despotic even if they should represent a whole nation.

You always had an explanation, you always knew it. It was like the world was nothing but a book you were reading. You always explained it to him with such a exited tone and such a sparkle in your eyes. That witty and sassy attitude that matched his, you were just such a good team.

He couldn't help but fall in love with you. And both his father and Paytah made known that they knew. Paytah went as far as organising a hang out between the three of you only to disappear on last minute.

After two years of a strong bond forming between the two of you, eagle flies started yearning to accompany your in your travels. But his people were his priority and he was already grateful enough that you helped him with his conflict even though you weren't even American.

You always send him letter when the journey got to long or to hard so he wouldn't worry about your well being. Travelling alone as a woman was no easy feat. But there was one time that he didn't received any letter from you in almost 5 months.

The people around him noticed how something was bothering him. Eagle Flies was worried. Not just worried, afraid.

He was already imagining the worst and was ready to mount on his horse and go search for you until a letter under Tacitus Kilgore surprised him.

Apparently and as you explained in the letter you had some trouble with the lawman to the point that you now had a small bounty under your name. The letter recalled the events like this.

Dearest Eagle Flies:

I'm aware I haven't written in a long time and both you and paytah must be worried.

I am fine, well, as fine as someone can be with a 20 dollar bounty on their heads on the state of New Austin.

After a little trouble I had with the lawmen I managed to hide myself and I have found a decent enough group of people, a gang that is willing to take me in.

We are near Blackwater by now. I hope you understand that I will not be able to visit you as often anymore but I promise that as soon as we get out of here I will write to you again and tell you everything in person.

Rewards, your friend, Y/N.

Apparently you were now part of a gang. He was glad that you were alive and ok, but he still felt disappointed about the new situation.

While he was still adapting to the news, you, on the other hand were trying to adapt to your new companions.

You've been with the gang for two month before writing to Eagle Flies and you have gotten along with everyone just fine. The girls were quick to welcome you. Miss Grimshaw was quick to put you to work. You've also made good friends with some other members such as Jenny, Mac, Lenny, Sean and Little Jack, who seemed very curious about your travels.

After the blackwater incident (6 months after you joining the gang), everything went downhill. You survived by divine luck. The gang had lost a few people on the way but you were finally on Valentine.

You didn't sent a letter to Eagle flies, you went straight to see him. When you arrived he was not there. His father, who very happily greeted you, told you that both him, Paytah and other young men were patroling the area since the army's grasp on them had become tighter.

Rains falls accompanied you while you waited for his son. He had grown very fond of you over the last years. You once confided in him that your own father had spent his life earning only to get you an opportunity for a better life and that you hope that someday you can save enough money to bring him to America with you.

He had been the nearest fatherly figure you had had over the last years and he was more than willing to take that position. He liked you for his son and he respected you as a person. It gave you a feeling of acceptance that you didn't knew you needed.

Finally Eagle Flies and the other young men came back. The moment he spotted you he quickly came down from his horse and turned to you to gave you the strongest and tightest hug someone has ever given you. You almost fell back because of the force he had.

He would never admit it in front of you (not anyone) but he almost cried when eh saw you waving at him.

"What the hell did you do! 20 dollars? They could had you hung for that!!" He was holding your shoulders, grounding himself, using you as an anchor.

"Two men! They tried to rob me and tracked me. Can you believe it! I have a gun for a reason, I just defended myself." You explained to him.

He hugged you once more being interrupted only by Paytah who also was happy to see you.

After that days, weeks and months passed and while the gangs situation was getting way more dangerous, the natives conflict was becoming unbearable.

The gang had been reduced by several lawmen and various internal conflicts to the point that even the most old member like Arthur were starting to question themselves.

Both you and Charles had worked hard to help the natives with Arthur starting to collaborate not to long ago.

When you were back in camp you tried to convince Abigail to run away with her son. You had become good friends and you knew that this was a downfall ride.

Finally an as the cherry on top, Eagle flies, who had become more bold in the last month's started hearing Dutch's advice and making not to good decisions.

Arthur, Charles and yourself were aware that Dutch would only make the situation worst and warned Rains fall about it.

Rains Fall had tried to warn his son. He had pleaded you to help him see reason.

"Please, Y/N, he will not listen to me. I nothing but a weak man in my son's eyes but he might listen to you." He asked while holding on your shoulders.

You had already talked with Eagle flies several times. Dissuading him to act impulsively but it was not enough anymore.

The worst of all had been that after being kidnapped and tortured. He still wanted more war. He was convinced that he either died in honour or lived in misery.

Rains Fall made a last effort of persuading his son to drop the violence to no avail. Eagle Flies rode to the oil fields with his men while you stayed back with Rains Fall.

"He is going to die, all of them are going to a assured death" He lamented to you, a tired and sad look on his face as if already imagining his son's corpse

You took his hands in yours and looked him in the eye "Rains fall, I swear to you, I will bring him back, whatever it takes."

He looked at you afraid that you would do something you might regret but the only thing you did was getting your horse and riding to the battle.

You were no fighter. You were decent enough with a gun but that's it. You felt a pit in your stomach, a remainder of your most primitive instincts shouting at you not to go.

You ignored the fear, thinking one last time about your father and how you would probably not see him again. That made a single tear drop but you weren't willing to loose the person who had helped you and accepted you the most just because he was an impulsive wreck.

By sheer luck you managed to not get shot by the military men. You saw eagle flies near the oil factory with the rest of the people. You quickly approached him and as soon as he noticed you he looked panicked.

" What are you doing here!!" He got closer to you searching for some injuries in your body.

"Trying to not get you killed" you took his hand on yours" Eagle flies, why are you so insistent to die when you have people to live for-" you were interrupted by the sounds of three soldiers attacking someone.

Both you and Eagle flies ran to see what was happening and while eagle flies was able to kill the three men that were stacking Arthur, he failed to notice the man with a gun in hand behind him.

You saw his intentions clear. Without thinking you jumped on that men and fought for a few seconds for the gun he had until...

A shot was heard against the cold walls of the place. You left out a squeak and a weak cry falling to the floor while your abdomen was turning red with your blood.

The dry sound that your body exited when hitting the surface made Eagle flies react. Arthur from the floor shotted the rich man that had shotted you.

"Y/N!!!" He took you in his arms, pressing on your injury to try and stop the bleeding. His hands were now a deep wet red. "Nonononon!" Some tears started to pool out from his eyes onto your face.

You were still weakly crying trying to breath as much as you could while dealing with the horrible pain.

Both Eagle flies and Arthur took you and helped you on one of the horses. Charles, Sadie, Bill, Javier and even Dutch looked perturbed by your injury.

You had made yourself a place in the gang, you've made friends and established respect with most of its members so your deathly wound was not a nice sight.

Eagle flies was in the same horse as you, mounting quickly to the tribe so they could try to heal you. Arthur and Charles accompanied him.

You had become quiet, whispering and whining desperately some things in Spanish he didn't fully understand. "Papa-" "Papa" " Lo siento, papa" "perdón, perdoname" Your cries could be mistaken for the ones a child made when very scared and that unsettled him.

Just as you were about to arrive to the tribe the uneven terrain made you fall form the horse. Eagle flies followed you quickly basically throwing himself to him you on his arms and trying desperately to make you stay awake.

"No! No, please hold on!!" He was fully crying now fully aware that the bullet was for him" Y/N! Stay awake please, we are already here. Wait a little more please" his begs warned his father whose face dropped at the scene.

"Oh no" was the first thing that fell from Rains Fall lips when he saw his son hugging your bleeding body. "Dad!" His sons call was desperate, his crying face showing the deep care he had for you "What happened?" he knelt down next to you and his son helping him add pressure to the wound.

"It was for me- the bullet- it was for me and she took it!!" Rains Fall watched in horror as he understood the last words you said to him Whatever it takes....

You were still saying faint "papá, perdon" very quietly and very fast, as a last prayer. But at least it indicated you were still alive.

Charles and Arthur helped Eagle flies carry you to his tent where some people who knew about medicine started treating you trying to save you.

Paytah looked completely speechless. Eagle flies injured and completely unconsolable, refusing to get away from you and you, the unexpected but dear friend he had made years ago at the verge of a painful death.

The night settled and while Charles stayed to keep an eye on you and ensure that you were ok, Arthur had some matters to discuss with Dutch.

————————————————————————

It had been four days since you were shot in the abdomen but a gun and it had been three and a half days since you fell unconscious.

Eagle flies had been there when you pleas for your father had finally shut down. He had a meltdown, thinking you had died but thankfully you just became unconscious.

He stayed at your side, feeding your sleeping body and helping with the change of tissues that were covering the wound.

He barely slept, keeping himself awake and talking to you at night about anything and nothing trying to distract himself.

Your breathing was the only reassurance he had that you were still there, with him. The faint pulse on your wrist also were an anchor for him.

He had only gotten out of his tent, in which you where, to get you food from paytah and the moment he came back in he found your head turned to the door and a very cracked voice.

"A-gua- Ag-ua" you quiet tone of voice was evidence of your weak state.:"water, please"

He immediately got out from his shock and guessed that you were asking for water.

With shaky hands he held your head and let you drink very slowly.

You stopped drinking and coughed a little, whining as you felt your wound. His hands didn't let your head and face.

"Your awake" he mumbled "You're awake!" he said now as if convincing himself, amused that your eyes were looking at his.

You couldn't summoned the strength to talk but instead you cried. Relieve tears after your almost death, relieve of seeing him alive made it all worthy it.

"Whatever it takes" he heard you mumble very silently.

He didn't leave your side for one moment. The rest of the people discovered that you were alive because paytah entered the tent and saw you sat down on the floor leaning on Eagle flies for support while you ate slowly.

That way you were able to contact Charles who quickly came to see you accompanied by Sadie.

Both of them were going to move away from the place after what happened to the gang. They told you to do the same, wishing you the best and giving you some of the money so you could start anew if you wished so.

By this point, eagle flies had already told you everything about his feeling, not willing to let you go ever again and you of course corresponded (as if taking a shot for him wasn't enough of a sign)

After a few weeks you could stand up, Eagle flies always insisted on you using him for support and always was near you, paying attention to see if you showed any signs of relapse.

Eventually the tribe decided to move to Canada since the army was not to be trusted no more, not that they ever were.

You went with them, the tribe had known you for quite some years now and with Rains Fall blessing your relationship with his son there was no better place for you.

Finally after all the years, you wrote to your father, telling him all about what happened for the last year and finally sending him the money to by a ticket to go to Canada.

You didn't knew what life had prepare for you and Eagle flies but you knew that whatever it was you would deal with it together.

-Unedited fanfic-

[khande11]

Millie Winchester- Season 1

Shadow- 4

Sam came to and saw Meg grinning at him, while he was tied to a post. Dean and Millie were tied to posts either side of him. Dean had blood dripping down from a cut on his eyebrow, while Millie had a bruise on her chin and a bloody lip.

"Hey, Sam? Don't take this the wrong way, but your girlfriend... is a bitch." Dean snarked, glaring at Meg. 

"Yep." Millie said, popping the 'p', despite it hurting her lip.

"This, the whole thing, was a trap. Running into you at the bar, following you here, hearing what you had to say- it was all a set up, wasn't it?" Sam asked, already knowing the answer. Meg chuckled. "And that the victims were from Lawrence."

"It doesn't mean anything." Meg grinned. "It was just to draw you in, that's all."

"You killed those two people for nothing." Millie muttered, angrily.

"Baby, I've killed a lot more for a lot less." Meg smirked.

"You trapped us. Good for you." Dean said, smiling sarcastically at her. "It's Miller time. But why don't you kill us already?"

"Not very quick on the uptake, are we?" Meg mocked him, then leaned in closer. "This trap isn't for you."

Millie and Dean looked at her, puzzled, while Sam's lip curled in anger as he realised what she meant. "Dad. It's a trap for Dad."

"Oh, sweetheart, you're dumber than you look." Dean smiled, as Meg rolled her eyes. "'Cause even if Dad was in town, which he is not, he wouldn't walk into something like this. He's too good."

"He is pretty good. I'll give you that." Meg made her way over to Dean, straddling his legs. "But you see... he has one weakness."

"What's that?"

"You. He lets his guard down around his kids, lets his emotions cloud his judgement. I happen to know he is in town, and he'll come and try to save you. And then the Daevas will kill everybody- nice and slow... and messy."

"Well, I've got news for you. It's gonna take a lot more than some... shadow to kill him."

"Oh, the Daevas are in the room here. They're invisible. Their shadows are just the only part you can see." 

"Why are you doing this, Meg?" Sam asked. "What kind of deal you got worked out here, huh? And with who?"

"I'm doing this for the same reasons you do what you do- loyalty, love." Meg snapped. "Like the love you had for Mommy... and Jess."

"Go to Hell." Sam snarled.

"Baby, I'm already there." Meg began crawling closer to Sam, whispering in his ear. "Come on, Sam. There's no need to be nasty. I think we both know... how you really feel about me. You know... I saw you... watching me... changing in my apartment. Turned you on, didn't it?"

"Get a room, you two." Dean rolled his eyes.

"Or get me a bucket." Millie said, grimacing at the sight of Meg flirting with her little brother.

"I didn't mind. I liked that you were watching me. Come on, Sammy, you and I can still have a little dirty fun." Meg whispered, kissing Sam's neck.

"You wanna have fun? Go ahead, then. I'm a little tied up right now."

Meg smiled and went back to kissing him. A noise near Dean made her stop. She walked behind Dean, and grabbed the knife from his hand. She tossed it into the corner, swinging around to face Dean, who chuckled guiltily. Meg slid back towards Sam, placing her lips close to his ear.

"Now, were you just trying to distract me while your brother cuts free?"

"No. No." Sam said, as Meg sat down in front of him. "It was to distract you while Millie cuts free."

Meg looked at him confused, until she felt herself be pulled away from Sam. She was turned around to face Millie, who quickly headbutted her, knocking her to the ground, while Sam cut himself free with his own knife. Millie grabbed her head in pain just as Sam freed himself.

"Sam! Millie! Get the altar." Dean called out. Sam walked towards the altar and overturned it. Suddenly, the shadow demons returned and dragged a screaming Meg across the floor and threw her out the window. Millie grabbed a knife from the floor and cut Dean free from his ropes. The three made their way to the window and saw Meg lying dead on the sidewalk.

"So, I guess the Daevas didn't like being bossed around." Sam said.

"Yeah, I guess not. Hey, Sam?" Dean asked.

"Hm?"

"Next time you want to get laid, find a girl that's not so buckets of crazy, huh?"

"Or, you know... gives us a heads up." Millie shrugged, patting Sam's shoulder.

***************

The Winchester siblings were walking down the hallway, towards their motel room.

"Why didn't you just leave that stuff in the car?" Dean asked Sam, referring to their weapons.

"I said it before, and I'll say it again- better safe than sorry." Sam replied, while Millie, who still had a headache from the headbutt, tried to drown them out as she opened the door. When they got inside, she noticed a figure standing by the window. 

"Hey!"

Sam turned on the light, as the stranger turned towards them, revealing himself.

"Dad." Dean muttered, in disbelief.

"Hey, kids." John smiled. Dean and John walked towards each other, sharing a long, emotional hug. They pulled apart, and John turned to Millie, who's eyes were shining.

"Hey, sweetheart." John smiled at his only daughter, who ran into her Dad's arms.

"Hi, Dad." Millie replied, softly. When they parted, John noticed Sam had joined their side.

"Hi, Sam."

"Hey, Dad." Sam muttered, happy to see his Dad, but still unsure how to greet him. He placed the bag of weapons onto the floor.

"Dad, it was a trap." Dean explained, apologetically. "I didn't know. I'm sorry."

"It's all right. I thought it might have been." 

"Were you there?" Millie asked.

"Yeah, I got there just in time to see the girl take the swan dive. She was the bad guy, right?"

"Yes, sir." The three replied in unison.

"Good. Well, it doesn't surprise me. It's tried to stop me before."

"The demon has?" Sam questioned.

"It knows I'm close. It knows I'm gonna kill it. Not just exorcise it or send it back to hell- actually kill it." John explained.

"How?" Dean asked, as John smiled.

"I'm working on that."

"Let us come with you. We'll help." Sam pleaded.

"No, Sam. Not yet. Just try to understand. This demon is a scary son of a bitch. I don't want you caught in the crossfire. I don't want you hurt."

"Dad, you don't have to worry about us." Sam said.

"Of course I do. I'm your father." John said, as his and the siblings' eyes began to get teary. "Listen, Sammy, last time we were together, we had one hell of a fight."

"Yes, sir." Sam nodded. John paused, trying to think of what to say.

"It's good to see you again. It's been a long time."

"Too long." Sam agreed. Millie and Dean watched as Sam and John embraced, letting their tears fall. 

John pulled away to smile at his other children, but was suddenly thrown back into a set of cabinets. The shadow demon swiped its claws across Sam's face, knocking him to the floor. Another demon slashed along Millie's stomach, sending her to the floor as well. 

"No!" Dean screamed, but the demons threw him to the floor, too.

Outside the motel, Meg walked towards a streetlight, not a scratch on her, as she held onto the pendant with the Zoroastrian symbol. She watched the windows of the Winchesters' room with an emotionless expression, knowing the Winchesters were being attacked.