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Do you have any other Ryoko Kui Oneshot recommendations? I just read the last ones you mentioned and i absolutely loved them
Honestly! I recommend all 3 of her published one shot compilations, they are all REALLY GOOD
You can read about each of them on this post, the text is from the english pamphlet of the Ryoko Kui Exhibition
A few that really stuck with me other the ones I've already mentioned here (wolves tell no lies, perfect communication and how to be that girl) were these (the order is just the order I remembered them)
The Dragon's School is on Top of the Mountain: The titular story of one of her published works, it makes me think about a few parts of Dungeon Meshi where Laios is trying to find an "use" for monsters in the surface. I really enjoyed the idea of trying to make dragons "useful" so they can continue to exist, it's very bittersweet.
Home: From the same collection as the previous one, it's about what happens to The Hero of the story after he has defeated the big evil, in the perspective of the simple villagers from his hometown. Makes my heart ache. Other stories in this collection have a similar theme of "story after the story" what might have happened after the conclusion of an adventure but this is the one that stuck to me the most
Spring and Autumn: Two oneshots from terrarium in drawer that tell the same story in different perspectives. Quite possibly the best "what if humans were pets" story I've ever seen (I've seen at least 2). I cried so hard, I'm crying right now 10/10 don't let the premise scare you off
Distant Utopia: Terrarium in drawer is AMAZING but here just one more to maybe convince everyone to read, children are tasked with creating a story about "bullying persecution and discrimination", end up realizing things aren't so simple as they first thought
A Modern Fairytale: Ok dragon school might be my favorite one shot collection. This one is about a fantasy creature (centaurs) living in modern times, and the struggles that might cause in society alongside humans. It's a really interesting and grounded take that I don't think I've even seen before (Plus the centaur wife that shows up in short sections is adorable)
Mermaid Sanctuary: From Seven little sons's of the Dragon like wolves tell no lies. A guy finds a mermaid that keeps trying to go into land for some reason. Everyone tells him to leave it be cause "mermaids aren't human, they're just animals that mimic humans" but he decides to help her anyway. It's very interesting with how it portraits mermaids
That's it for my favorites! I really recommend everything by Kui tho, I had to stop myself before I just listed all the oneshots
Btw you can buy Seven Little Sons of the Dragon in english
#ask#recommendations#manga recommendations#ryoko kui#one shots#about cyan#ausaic#long post#edit: FINALLY FIXED THE LINK#Added mermaid sanctuary
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25 predictions for 2025 (pick-a-card reading)
happy new year sillies <3 01-01-2025 ☆
disclaimer: all of my readings are just for fun, you write your own story every day of your life, dont let me tell you how to live it
pile 1 > pile 2 pile 3 > pile 4
pile 1
biggest theme: change
reflexion and redirection are major elements of the new year
breaking free of past shackles : discarding old things
miracle year, a lot of wonderful things are coming
be selfish. you are in charge of your own happiness
you will learn to love yourself this year
fulfilling year especially in terms of career or academics. make sure to properly prepare in order to gain an edge over others
early bird gets the worm mentality
"winter arc" mindset the whole year. "lock in"
first six months will be very busy, you'll focus on yourself and not have the time for romance
learning how to collaborate with others
big lesson: learning how to work through burnout
august 2025 will be a very happy month for you
potential summer fling, will reginite flames you didn't know you had
some kind of soul fulfillment, could potentially be romantic or personal
imbalanced feminine energy, learning to reconnect with your divine feminine
a turbulent period will occur (im hearing mercury retrograde)
last half of the year might be grey
sleepy energy, taking things slower
make sure to rest, dont push yourself to move when sluggy
you're going to end the year with a nice energy. i see you surrounded by lots of family, friends and people you hold dear
if last year did not feel chrismassy, dont worry, because this year will
an extra message about children and new families. pregancy within you or another may occur
releasing all anxieties caused by this year, and a lot of reflexion
overall a pretty good year, some guidance i might give would be to not push yourself over the edge, and try not to drink too much caffiene <3
pile 2
biggest theme: self love
i get the feeling you've lost someone very important this year, most likely a break up, but you still have feelings for them
disillusionment and prioritizing yourself are big themes for this year
you're going to recognize that this person was pretty toxic and will take them off of their pedestal
learning how to fall in love again, with yourself and with life
reconnecting with your femininity
a lot of themes about toxicity and distancing yourself from people that don't have your best interests at heart
crown chakra healing by taking one day at a time (a LOT of light purple imagery in this reading)
very tumultuous first few months of the year, you'll feel like your life is flipping upside down and rightside up for a while
reconnecting with your spiritual guides and your spirituality/religion will bring you peace
if you're not religious, exploring some concepts may occupy your time
potential new romantic interest, but you must fall in love with yourself first
advice i can give would be to start something new, and to spend a lot of time by yourself. take yourself on dates and spend time with loved ones
sleep is very important this year, maybe consider starting a dream journal
i feel like most of you will get into some kind of artsy hobby this year. this can be anything from visual to musical to physical, but i can see it becoming a big passion
learning how to be more flexible in your thoughts and actions is a big lesson
springtime (particularly may) will be an amazing period
indie movie life in the spring, it'll feel like your life is straight out of a book
productivity, creativity, and happiness will be at an all-time high
you'll meet so many new people during this time, and im seeing some travelling too
child-like energy, almost like a giddy joy
make sure to not forget your responsabilities, i can see that you might be too caught up in your excitement and forget to balance work and play
overall very good year. it might not feel like it right now, but things are guarenteed to get better <3
some guidance i would give would be to reflect on your past, but never to dwell in it
pile 3
biggest theme: new beginnings and hope
amazing potential, i can see you're carrying something precious from 2024, and wanting it to grow in the new year
it will, but be sure to wait for the right time and approach it with dedication, consistency and care
strong foundations are laid, but be sure to not be reckless
good communication and problem resolving skills are going to be very important this year
flexibility and detachment are going to be vital too, dont try to control situations and dictate outcomes
forgive others for their mistakes but be sure to be assertive too
for those in a romantic relationship: this relationship will last a long time <3
messages about changing your identity, there will be a time when you dont recognize yourself, take some time to reconnect with your inner values
"lucky girl syndrome" mindset. you'll be attracting so many blessings this year
abundance really is yours this year, the cards are showing so many blessings coming your way
affirm to yourself that you have everything you desire, and it will appear
summertime will be an extremely happy period for you. i see a lot of happy memories being made, and a lot of productivity as well
the end of summer and fall might be when things slow down a little, i see a little more uncertainty and anxiety, but it will all pass
big emphasis on relationships this year, but mostly romantic
for those currently in a relationship, here is confirmation that your person is a soulmate and will be in your life long-term
for the singles out there, you'll soon meet an amazing person (timeframe: june or july)
in terms of academics and career, your year will be pretty tame
there will be important decisions to make, and that might stress you out, but the outcome will be good
bottom line: the ending of this year will be good, and there's nothing you can do to change that
important lessons you will need to learn will be to think things through before acting upon them, hanging with people you feel truly appreciate you, and walking away when you feel they don't
appearances may be deceiving, make sure the people you surround yourself with have your best interests at heart
do not compare yourself with others, this year will hammer in that lesson time and time again
overall a very good year, some guidance i would give would be to guard your heart from people with negative intentions. there are snakes and backstabbers everywhere, keep yourself safe <3
pile 4
biggest theme: self-improvement
this year you'll return to your roots, fully shedding your old life to try and reconnect with your innermost values
reassess what works for you and what doesn't, i sense a lot of toxcitity in your life
this year you'll develop many new relationships with many new people
these relationships will provide interpersonal insight: remember that you are who you surround yourself with
this year, you'll practice setting boundaries
its never aggressive to be assertive, and those who matter won't mind
despite the heavy focus on new relationships, prioritize yourself
going on walks, meditating, journalling and going on solo dates are all amazing ways to start to feel comfortable alone
this year will be full of endings, dont resist it, embrace it
change isn't inherently bad, just like how difference isn't inherently bad
very financially stable year, you'll be more open to taking career risks
if there were any financial struggles in the past year, take comfort in knowing there will be little to nothing of the sort in the future
be careful to not be boastful about your finances though, as its better to succeed in silence
you create your own happiness, you are the main character, stop relying on others to save you
this year, you'll stop seeking others validation and look inside of yourself to find what you've been searching for in others
you'll be stepping into a bad bitch energy this year, one that feels comfortable being alone or with others
strong leadership is something you'll be developping this year, as well as strong manifestation skills
you want it, you're going to get it!!
go after all of your goals this year, hesitance will do you no good
i can see that at the end of the year, you'll emerge a totally different person
you'll be more confident, self-assured and more joyful (i sense that autumn is an important time period)
overall, this year will be a fresh chapter in your life
you'll shed the old you, bad habits, and negative aspects to make way for a life and personality that's authentically you
some advice i would give would be to not be afraid to stand apart, dont worry about the opinions of others
speak of success, and it will come to you <3
#pac#pick a pile#tarot#pick a card#tarot reading#intuition#intuitive messages#pac tarot#intuitive#intuitive readings#free tarot reading#manifestation#have an amazing 2025 <3
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I’m so glad to finally be back to this story! The end of the year 2024 was a rotten cherry on top of a trash fire cake which was a drain on my energy. But I definitely haven’t forgotten about this one – especially since I have been super amazed at how quickly you’ve been able to write this story and publish it. You’re awesome! I’ve seen some light spoilers to this on my dash from people’s comments so I know it’s going to be a ride and I’m here for it!
You’re not anxious at all over meeting with Pepper, but what has you on alert is the possibility that you could theoretically meet Steve Rogers, former Captain America, today.
Oh, interesting. So we’re seeing subtle hints that she’s a Steve girl right off the bat – but then again, like when we see her think about her friendship with Pepper, it’s clear that she’s not just starstruck or someone easily swooned by celebrity status. Are we harboring perhaps a little crush here?
Your background in political science and your years working in non-profit management seem like they could be useful, but you can't help feeling a little out of your depth.
I always say in comments that I enjoy it when we see the little things that make the Reader similar to Steve, or qualities that I know Steve will find attractive, and I feel like working in a non-profit is definitely one of those. Doing her best to make a better world.
You were among the half who disappeared - still such a strange concept to grasp though you were supposedly settled back in.
I don’t read a lot of post-Endgame fics / fics that deal with the Blip one way or the other, but when I do read them, I immensely enjoy writers working with all the things that the Blip would cause, and I think we’ll see a layered, deep approach on it from you in this fic! I’m definitely curious.
"There's Maria Hill," Pepper continues, "who's handling security and intelligence briefings. She's got connections that'll be invaluable. Then there's Peter Parker - you might know him as Spider-Man - he's officially our youth outreach coordinator, but he's also got a brilliant scientific mind that we're tapping into for policy development."
Oh it’s lovely to see that Peter is still around the Stark Foundation even with Tony gone, and hehehe, the little reveal of his identity. I love how competent we see Pepper be here, how she’s been so good at putting this team together.
You feel your jaw drop in shock, almost hitting the ground as your mind races with disbelief and anger. The room feels like it's spinning as you struggle to process the weight of her words.
I love how you wrote her shock here; it makes sense that her first reaction to this would be anger – she would feel like she’d be just a trophy wife when she’s been hoping for a big role. And while I’m certain she’ll have just that big role, it makes sense that initially a marriage of state, essentially, would sound insane in modern-day America.
"I know," Pepper says softly. "That's part of the plan. We want to show that leadership isn't about who you're married to or what your last name is. It's about vision, compassion, and the ability to bring people together."
But I really like this point. It feels very Steve – I adored all the glimpses we saw into his plans through her thoughts, as well as her note about not even being able to sleep – to create a world like this and especially lead by example.
“We have an opportunity to show what a healthy partnership in marriage could look like to new generations. You’re my first and only choice because of your skills, experience, and the vision I know you would bring to the table. But you’re also my first and only choice because I think you two are well-suited for each other.”
I really really love this, in addition to the way we see Pepper go through the strategic side of this, the polls and expectations and all this. This feels like something that Steve would agree to, in the end. After all, he is from a world where marriage wasn’t so focused on romantic love. But since he is a romantic, I’m definitely looking forward to them falling in love.
A soft laugh falls from Pepper’s mouth. “He actually asked the same thing.”
Hehe, more of the little things that show they’re similar.
And yet, there's a part of you that's intrigued by the challenge, by the opportunity to make a real difference on such a grand scale.
I love her your honor. I always enjoy Readers that are shown to be competent and not afraid of going after what they want. Also this is a very Steve thing again.
You both lost husbands, but you don’t want to talk about it, yet again, and you don’t want to bring up a painful subject for her either.
Oh, I’m intrigued by this. Is she a widow too?
"You must be the future Mrs. Rogers," Sam says with a warm smile, extending his hand. "I'm Sam Wilson. Steve asked me to come apologize and explain - and to have breakfast with you, if you’ll have me.”
Oh, I wonder what came up for Steve to skip this. But aww, I hope she and Sam end up being friends, as I can definitely see that happening.
“President Bartlet?” you can’t help the awe in your voice. “I’d skip out on breakfast with me, too.”
Oh, yeah, that makes sense. It’d be very beneficial for him, and I enjoyed seeing that Reader understands. And yay, we’ll be seeing more Sam in the fic!
“I can’t help being a little disappointed - since I was hoping to finally meet my future husband - but he’s unemployed and you’re technically Captain America, so I guess it’s really an upgrade.”
Oh, you and me both, Sam. I really really like this Reader. I’ll nickname her the First Lady for comment purposes, since that’s easier for me. I hope you don’t mind!
"Trust me, Steve takes this very seriously," Sam says, his tone becoming more earnest. "He may not know you yet, but he respects you and the commitment you're making. He's not the type to back out or let you down."
Oh, Aspen, you’re coming straight for my heart with this. This isn’t even a thirst trap, it’s a heart trap, and that’s worse. I love how serious we see Steve be about this from the beginning, and I really like how reassuring Sam is here too.
"But then again, I've seen a lot of crazy things in my time with the Avengers. This? This actually feels like one of the more normal things I've been part of."
Also this tracks, and I wonder if this is a part of Steve’s mindset too.
"Steve's one of the best men I know. He's loyal, compassionate, and has a moral compass that doesn't quit. But he's also been through a lot, and he can be... guarded. It might take some time for him to open up fully."
This makes complete sense, and I am HERE for the pining and the slow burn that’ll follow from this. It’s very compassionate of Sam to warn her about this so she doesn’t get the wrong idea about Steve’s behavior, if he’s going to be a little distant. And also this has the delightful found family vibes – which are definitely highlighting some major loss in First Lady’s background, I mean, she has to have a hint of craziness and not a lot to lose to jump into this headfirst – that I always enjoy in fic.
Sam grins. "Trust me, once you two actually meet, you'll see what I mean. Just don't let that 'aw shucks' routine fool you. He might look like an all-American boy scout, but there's a lot more going on under the surface."
I’m definitely looking forward to all this characterization; from the (shamefully few) works that I’ve read from you so far, I know you write Steve in a very human way. And this is definitely hinting towards how he’s not just the perfect soldier or the good man but human and I am always here here for it. And we love Sam for recognizing all this in his friend.
Also as a more general note, I enjoyed Reader having these little doubts about the marriage side of it working – there is definitely hint here that while she’s not waiting to be swept off her feet, she’s certainly not going for a simple marriage of convenience. I always enjoy fics that show that wanting love and to be loved aren’t mutually exclusive with things like strength or independence.
You learn about Steve's dry sense of humor, his unwavering loyalty to his friends, and his surprising skill at sketching. Sam describes missions where Steve's quick thinking saved the day, but also quieter moments - movie nights with the team, intense debates over board games, and Steve's ongoing struggle to catch up on pop culture.
I love this for her. And for Steve. That she goes into the whole marriage knowing not only Cap but also Steve Rogers. I am VERY excited for the wedding, and not just because I love weddings. I know it's the delicious sort of slow burn when they don't even lay an eye on each other in the first two chapters.
I’m so glad to be back at this and I’m so looking forward to diving into the next chapter! Sorry if I got a little rambly or overexcited but I had so many thoughts. I hope you're well and the muse is behaving!
Red, White & True: Manhattan & Brooklyn (1/?)
Characters/Pairings: Steve Rogers (future x curvy Millennial Female!Reader), Pepper Potts, Sam Wilson Word Count: 4k Summary: "There was an idea..." Words at the heart of what brought the Avengers together. Pepper Potts has persuaded Steve Rogers to step up and help again - but this time in a battle to The White House. She invites you to consider a key position.
Content/Warnings: none
Notes: This takes place in a post-Endgame scenario where Steve stays and generally most of TFATWS happened.
Prologue | Series
↠ Main Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
[MAY 15 - Manhattan, New York]
You try not to hold still while you wait in the lobby, but you’re nervous and the longer you sit, the more difficult it is to resist drumming your fingers, tapping your foot, jiggling your right leg as it’s crossed over your left, or even just chewing on your bottom lip.
You’re not anxious at all over meeting with Pepper, but what has you on alert is the possibility that you could theoretically meet Steve Rogers, former Captain America, today.
You take a deep breath, trying to calm your nerves. The lobby of Stark Industries is immaculate, all sleek lines and modern design. The large windows let in plenty of natural light, making the space feel open and inviting despite its corporate purpose.
Your mind wanders back to your college days when you’d walked into a different Stark Industries lobby for the first time, a hopeful intern wanting to make a difference at the then-new Stark Foundation office. Pepper had been very involved in building the Foundation at the time, and had become a key mentor and - as the years passed and you left Stark Industries - a dear friend. She had helped fuel some of your late-night study sessions through grad school. Living in a new state, she had shown up and seen you through breakups, family drama, and the stress of putting together your thesis. Even when your paths diverged, you'd managed to stay in touch.
Back then, she’d become like the older sister you never had, seeing you through some of the difficult years figuring out how to be a real adult. Now, here you are, waiting to potentially join a presidential campaign she’s orchestrating for none other than Steve Rogers.
The receptionist's voice startles you out of your reverie. "Ms. Potts will see you now."
You stand, smoothing down your carefully chosen outfit - professional, but not stuffy. As you follow the receptionist down the hallway, your mind races with possibilities. What position could Pepper have in mind for you? Your background in political science and your years working in non-profit management seem like they could be useful, but you can't help feeling a little out of your depth.
As you approach Pepper's office, you take a deep breath to steady yourself. The door opens, and there she is - Pepper Potts, looking as poised and confident as ever in a crisp white blouse and tailored navy suit. Her strawberry blonde hair is pulled back in a neat ponytail, and her smile is warm and welcoming.
"It's so good to see you," she says, embracing you in a quick hug. "Come in, please."
You step into her spacious office, taking in the floor-to-ceiling windows with a breathtaking view of the city skyline. Pepper gestures to a comfortable-looking chair across from her desk, and you sit, trying to keep your nerves in check.
"I appreciate you coming on such short notice," Pepper begins. "I know it's been a few years since we’ve been able to catch up - even before the Blip.”
You were among the half who disappeared - still such a strange concept to grasp though you were supposedly settled back in. “I was happy to come! And of course I don’t mind a trip on the Stark Industries dime,” you say with a grin.
"Can I get you anything? Water? Coffee?"
You shake your head. "I'm fine, thanks."
Pepper settles into her chair, folding her hands on the desk. "So, I know I told you we’re putting together the campaign team for Rogers for America, but I'm sure you're wondering more specifically why I called you here."
You nod, leaning forward in your chair, eager to hear Pepper’s vision.
"We're putting together an incredible team," she begins, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "I've been reaching out to some of the brightest minds in politics, economics, and social justice. We have former White House staffers, grassroots organizers, and even a few unexpected faces from the private sector who are eager to contribute their expertise."
You are instantly intrigued, trying to imagine the caliber of people she's describing. Your mind races with possibilities - perhaps that brilliant campaign manager who orchestrated the upset victory in the last Senate race, or the economist whose revolutionary ideas about sustainable development have been making waves in academic circles.
"We've got strategists who are anticipating every move our opponents might make," Pepper continues, "and communications experts who can craft messages that will resonate with voters across the political spectrum.”
You listen intently, trying to pinpoint where you might fit into this powerhouse group.
"There's Maria Hill," Pepper continues, "who's handling security and intelligence briefings. She's got connections that'll be invaluable. Then there's Peter Parker - you might know him as Spider-Man - he's officially our youth outreach coordinator, but he's also got a brilliant scientific mind that we're tapping into for policy development."
Your eyebrows raise at the mention of Spider-Man.
Pepper leans forward, her eyes locking with yours. "But here's the thing - we're not just assembling a team of political operatives and policy experts. We need people who understand the heart of what we're trying to do, who can see the bigger picture and help keep us grounded in our core values."
Your heart begins to race as you start to realize where this might be going.
"That's where you come in," Pepper says, a warm smile spreading across her face. "I've watched your career over the years, how you've navigated the non-profit world, building coalitions and making real change happen. You have a gift for bringing people together, for seeing connections that others miss. Your experience gives you a unique perspective that we desperately need."
Your heart races as you process her words. You had assumed you might be offered some kind of advisory role, perhaps in fundraising or event planning. Maybe even appearance management or offering occasional input on strategy. But from Pepper's tone, it sounds like she has something more substantial in mind.
"Where do you see me on this team?" you ask, trying to keep your voice steady.
"I've been putting a lot of thought into this," Pepper continues, her voice filled with conviction. “You know we’re doing something unconventional. Did you read the presidential plan?”
You nod. Steve’s bid for President of the United States was still technically not public knowledge. You had signed an NDA - being told only that you were receiving a proposal Pepper wanted your input and consultation on, with potential to join the team if you supported the initiative, and just silence if you didn’t.
“It’s bold, idealistic, aspirational; but it’s also unapologetic, has clear plans of action, and could be transformational in ways we haven’t seen in living memory,” you give your assessment.
“And it’s something you could see yourself being a part of?”
You take a deep breath, but smile genuinely. “I couldn’t sleep the first night after you sent it over. I couldn’t stop reading, hoping, re-reading, imagining possibilities!”
“Good,” Pepper responds. “Perfect.”
“Put me to work wherever you need me!”
“I was hoping you would say that because I have a very specific position I need to get filled, and you’re my first - and only - pick for the job.”
“Pepper, stop holding out!” A nervous and eager laugh escapes you. “Tell me!”
Her response slams into you like a freight train, knocking the air from your lungs.
“Future First Lady.”
You feel your jaw drop in shock, almost hitting the ground as your mind races with disbelief and anger. The room feels like it's spinning as you struggle to process the weight of her words.
"What?" you gasp, your voice barely above a whisper. "Pepper, I... I don't understand. First Lady? But that would mean..."
Pepper holds up a hand, her expression serious. "We're not just running a campaign here. We're trying to redefine what leadership looks like in this country. Steve is an incredible man, and he needs a partner who understands the complexities of modern America, not just a trophy wife, someone who can connect with people from all walks of life."
You shake your head, still reeling. "But I'm not - I mean, Steve and I aren't even - we've never even met!"
"I know," Pepper says softly. "That's part of the plan. We want to show that leadership isn't about who you're married to or what your last name is. It's about vision, compassion, and the ability to bring people together."
Pepper leans back in her chair, her expression at least revealing some concern over your reaction. "I know it's a lot to take in."
"A lot to take in?" you interrupt, your voice rising. "Pepper, it's insane! It’s May, and the election is in November. How could I possibly be the First Lady?"
Pepper holds up a hand, trying to calm you. "I know, I know. Let me explain."
But you're on a roll now, your initial shock giving way to indignation. "Explain what? How you thought it was okay to offer me a position that requires me to be married to a stranger? Use me to score points?”
"I understand your reaction," Pepper says calmly, "but please, hear me out. This isn't about scoring political points or creating some sham marriage. We're trying to redefine what leadership looks like in this country."
You take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself. "Go on," you say, your voice tight, “because you’re still trotting out marriage.”
"We can’t outright ignore traditional expectations and polling numbers. If Steve were running as the nominee for either of the major parties, we could probably win without him being married, but since he’s running as an independent, he needs a wife. That being said, we want to move away from the traditional concept of the First Lady as just the President's wife," Pepper explains. "The vision is a First Partnership. Two people who work together. There’ve been a few First Ladies who have done more with their platform and position, and that’s what we would want for you, too.”
You chew on your lip, not persuaded yet, but a little less angry.
“We have an opportunity to show what a healthy partnership in marriage could look like to new generations. You’re my first and only choice because of your skills, experience, and the vision I know you would bring to the table. But you’re also my first and only choice because I think you two are well-suited for each other.”
You open your mouth to protest, but Pepper raises her hand to stop you.
“You and Steve don’t have to put on a show and be madly in love - that’s not what I want, that’s not what he wants or expects either.”
You frown. “What does he expect?” you ask. And then you perk up even more. “Has he agreed to this? Shouldn’t he at least be here to make the offer himself?”
Pepper sighs. “It was easier for me to convince him to run in the first place than to agree that he needed a wife.”
“But you’re telling me he did agree?”
Pepper nods. “He did.”
You unconsciously rub the empty space on your left ring finger. “Couldn’t we just get engaged and leave the question of a marriage for whether or not he wins?”
A soft laugh falls from Pepper’s mouth. “He actually asked the same thing.”
“And…?” You raise your eyes expectantly.
“The public would rake us over the coals and accuse us of only doing it as a publicity stunt. The campaign would become a gossip column on your relationship status and nothing more.”
“But isn’t it a publicity stunt?”
“We can spin a marriage that seems to appear out of nowhere. Steve’s always been a private person when it comes to his personal life. We will tell people you met through me - which is true. I thought you were well-suited for each other - which I do. When people asked why the wedding just before announcing his bid for the presidency, we tell them you two didn’t want your relationship status to become the big question on everyone’s minds so they can focus on the platforms and policies instead and that every marriage takes work regardless of the length of the courtship.”
You sit in stunned silence for a moment, trying to process everything Pepper has said. The idea of marrying someone you've never met, let alone becoming the First Lady of the United States, seems utterly surreal. And yet, there's a part of you that's intrigued by the challenge, by the opportunity to make a real difference on such a grand scale.
"I need some time to think about this," you finally say, your voice barely above a whisper.
Pepper nods understandingly. "Of course. It's a lot to take in. But I want you to know that I wouldn't have asked you if I didn't think you were perfect for this role. Not just as a political partner, but as someone who could genuinely connect with Steve."
You raise an eyebrow. "You really think we'd be well-suited?"
"I do," Pepper says with confidence and warmth.
You rub your ring finger again, but this time you see Pepper’s eyes drop to watch your unconscious action, and you quickly stop. Her eyes, when you meet them again, are full of sympathy. You both lost husbands, but you don’t want to talk about it, yet again, and you don’t want to bring up a painful subject for her either.
She can read that in your tight-lipped smile.
So instead she says, “I can give you three days to think it over.”
You sigh and rise from your seat to go. “I don’t know if that’s long enough, but if you give me three days or three weeks, I don’t think it will change my decision I’ll land on. Give me the night to sleep on it. I think I’ll know by tomorrow morning.”
[JUNE 4 - Brooklyn, New York]
Three weeks later, your life has been packed up and put in a truck on its way to the new brownstone in Brooklyn that’s been acquired for you and Steve to move into, and you’re sitting at a table in a café a few blocks away, waiting to meet your future husband for the first time over breakfast. Every time the bell rings over the door, you dart your head to see if it’s him, but he’s evidently running late.
As you wait, checking to see if you have any messages on your phone, the bell over the door chimes once more. This time, when you look up, your breath catches in your throat. A tall, athletic man with dark skin and an easy smile has entered the café. You recognize him immediately as Sam Wilson, the new Captain America. Your heart sinks a little as you realize Steve isn't with him.
Sam spots you and makes his way over, his stride confident but casual. As he approaches, you notice the way his eyes scan the room, a habit born from years of military training and superhero work. He's dressed in civilian clothes - a leather jacket over a simple t-shirt and jeans - but there's no mistaking the aura of strength and capability that surrounds him.
"You must be the future Mrs. Rogers," Sam says with a warm smile, extending his hand. "I'm Sam Wilson. Steve asked me to come apologize and explain - and to have breakfast with you, if you’ll have me.”
You nod, forcing a smile, and shake his hand. "Of course. I understand.” You motion toward the chair across the table from you, inviting him to sit. “I know campaign prep must keep him incredibly busy."
Ever since you’d accepted the proposition to marry Steve Rogers and join him on the campaign trail to the White House, your own life had turned upside down, giving you hardly any time to breathe, and you’d been told this was only a mild version of what your own schedule was going to look like once Steve formally announced.
“Former President Bartlet agreed to meet with him, and the schedules ended up aligning this morning for Steve to go up to New Hampshire for a sit down,” Sam explains.
“President Bartlet?” you can’t help the awe in your voice. “I’d skip out on breakfast with me, too.”
“I hope I’m not a disappointment of a substitute,” Sam teases. “Since we’ll be working together as part of the senior staff, I volunteered because I was eager to finally meet you.”
His smile is genuine, and you feel the absolute truth of his sentiment. It melts away some of your disappointment and worry.
In return, your smile becomes a little warmer and easier. “I can’t help being a little disappointed - since I was hoping to finally meet my future husband - but he’s unemployed and you’re technically Captain America, so I guess it’s really an upgrade.”
Sam laughs. “Oh, I’m going to love you, I can tell.”
“Just promise me he’ll actually be at the ceremony tomorrow?” you ask. Your tone is light, but Sam calls your bluff.
His laughter fades, replaced by a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, he'll be there. Wild horses couldn't keep him away. Or androids. Or aliens. Or wizards. Or..." He trails off, realizing he might be overdoing it. "You get the idea."
You nod, appreciating Sam's attempt at humor. "I hope so. It would be pretty awkward to explain to the press why the groom was a no-show at his own wedding."
"Trust me, Steve takes this very seriously," Sam says, his tone becoming more earnest. "He may not know you yet, but he respects you and the commitment you're making. He's not the type to back out or let you down."
You nod, feeling a mix of relief and nervousness. "I suppose I should get used to schedule changes and last-minute adjustments," you say, trying to keep your tone light.
"It's part of the package," Sam agrees. "But so is having a team of people who have your back, no matter what." He leans forward, his eyes meeting yours intently. "I want you to know that includes me. We're not just colleagues in this; we're family."
His words touch you deeply, and you feel a bloom of warmth in your chest, the firs time you’ve felt grounded since you agreed to do this. "Thank you, Sam," you manage to say. "That means a lot."
The waitress approaches, he orders coffee, and you both order breakfast.
As she walks away, you take a sip of the drink you’d ordered while you were waiting before, mulling over Sam's words. "Can I ask you something, Sam? You know Steve better than almost anyone. Do you think...?”
You hesitate, uncertain if you should voice your doubts to Sam. But his open, friendly demeanor encourages you to continue, and you’re going to need to learn to trust this new circle of people you’ll be surrounded with.
"Do you think this is crazy?" you finally ask, your voice barely above a whisper. "Marrying someone I've never even met, maybe becoming First Lady... it all feels so surreal."
Sam leans back in his chair, considering your question carefully. "Crazy? Maybe," he admits with a small smile. "But then again, I've seen a lot of crazy things in my time with the Avengers. This? This actually feels like one of the more normal things I've been part of."
You can't help but chuckle at that, some of the tension easing from your shoulders.
"Look," Sam continues, his tone becoming more serious. "I won't lie to you. It's not going to be easy. The scrutiny, the pressure, the constant demands on your time and energy - it's going to be a lot. But if anyone can handle it, it's Steve. And from what I've heard about you, I think you're up for the challenge, too."
Sam pauses as the waitress returns with your breakfasts and his coffee. Once she's gone, he continues, "Steve doesn't do anything halfway. When he commits to something, he's all in. And he's committed to this - to you, to this campaign, to trying to make a real difference."
You nod, appreciating his honesty. "And what about... us? Steve and me, I mean. Do you think we can make this work? Not just for the campaign, but as a real partnership?"
Sam's eyes soften. "Steve's one of the best men I know. He's loyal, compassionate, and has a moral compass that doesn't quit. But he's also been through a lot, and he can be... guarded. It might take some time for him to open up fully."
You absorb this information, feeling a mix of apprehension and curiosity about your future husband. "I appreciate your honesty, Sam," you say softly. "I guess we'll both be navigating uncharted waters."
Sam nods, taking a sip of his coffee before responding. "True, but you won't be doing it alone. Not only do you have the support of the team, but I think you and Steve might surprise yourselves. You both have a strong sense of purpose, a desire to help others. That's a solid foundation to build on."
You pick at your breakfast, mulling over Sam's words. "I just hope we can find some common ground beyond the campaign," you admit.
Sam leans in, his expression earnest. "Like I said, when Steve commits to something, he gives it his all. That includes relationships. He may be reserved at first, but once he lets you in, you'll have his unwavering loyalty and support."
You nod, feeling a bit more reassured. "I appreciate that. I’m not some hopeless romantic, I’m not looking to be swept off my feet, but I just hope we can find some chemistry, some spark beyond just being political partners."
Sam chuckles. "Oh, I wouldn't worry too much about that. Steve might be from the 1940s, but he's still a red-blooded man. And you," he gestures at you with his fork, "are definitely his type."
You feel your cheeks flush slightly. "His type?"
"Smart, independent, passionate about making a difference," Sam lists off. “
Your work in non-profits, your passion for social justice - that's right up Steve's alley. Plus, you've got that whole 'take no crap' vibe that he needs. I have a sense about these things, and you have it.”
You laugh, feeling some of the tension dissipate. "Well, I'll take your word for it. Though I have to admit, the idea of being Steve Rogers' 'type' is a bit surreal."
Sam grins. "Trust me, once you two actually meet, you'll see what I mean. Just don't let that 'aw shucks' routine fool you. He might look like an all-American boy scout, but there's a lot more going on under the surface."
You raise an eyebrow. "Oh? Do tell."
Sam shakes his head, still smiling. "Nah, I'll let you discover that for yourself. Where's the fun if I spoil all the surprises?"
You roll your eyes good-naturedly. "Fine, keep your secrets. But seriously, Sam, thank you. For breakfast, for the pep talk, for everything. I'm really glad I got to meet you before tomorrow."
"Me too," Sam says, raising his coffee mug in a mock toast. "To new beginnings and unexpected partnerships."
You clink your own mug against his, feeling a surge of warmth and camaraderie. As you finish your breakfast, the conversation flows easily between you and Sam. He regales you with stories of his adventures with Steve, carefully omitting any classified details but painting a vivid picture of the man you're about to marry.
You learn about Steve's dry sense of humor, his unwavering loyalty to his friends, and his surprising skill at sketching. Sam describes missions where Steve's quick thinking saved the day, but also quieter moments - movie nights with the team, intense debates over board games, and Steve's ongoing struggle to catch up on pop culture.
As Sam talks, you find yourself leaning in, captivated by these glimpses of reality, getting to know more about the man behind the myth. And even if the next twenty-four hours will be a whirlwind of you choosing and getting fitted for your wedding dress; interviewing candidates that have been vetted for your personal staff - assistant, pr strategist, stylist, initiative director; and a bachelorette party; you feel like you’ll be able to face it all with the bit of reassurance you’ve gained by spending this time with Sam.
next part: LAS VEGAS & CLEVELAND
↠ Main Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
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This story will have 3-4 chapters, depending on where I split up the narrative. I anticipate about a chapter a week, usually posted on Fridays.
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first encounter ⟢ CL16
⟢ part two of you’re the closest to heaven that i’ll ever be
𖤓 series masterlist ⟢ playlist ⟢ part three ☽
PAIRINGS: charles leclerc x celestial!reader
SUMMARY: all thanks to leo, charles finally got the chance to meet you—the celestial being who has consumed his every waking thoughts, and managed to find out new things.
REMINDERS: this is purely fiction, the way how the character is portrayed in my story does not reflect the person that is portraying my character in real life. always separate fiction from reality, and do not repost or copy my work in any way.
WARNINGS: bible angel names references, some people may find this fic offensive, concept of divine beings and heaven & life and death, no use of y/n, angels and devils, mentions of papa leclerc (beginning is set in 2017) and jules bianchi, fluff, falling (literally & figuratively) in love, named side characters, angst but with a happy ending, purely written fic, a little bit of world building (concepts), mentions of death, bad/evil people, cursing, not proofread, and typos.
WORD COUNT: 5k
AUTHOR’S NOTE: this fic may not be some people’s cup of tea, if you don’t like it, don’t read it. sorry it took me a LONG time to post the part 2 of this series, i already have this on my drafts but never got the time to check on it bc i’ve been working on my other series (fa14 series), but finally, here it is! the part 3 may take a long time to be posted again 🥲 but you don’t have to worry bc i intend on finishing this series. taglist is open for this series, so just comment or message me if you want to be tagged. your comment/reblog is highly appreciated, and i hope you’ll enjoy this second part of the series!
It was a warm late afternoon in Monaco, and Charles had finally pulled himself out of his apartment, hoping that some fresh air and Leo’s cheerful company might turn off the constant thoughts running through his mind. Since that night in Singapore, you had been all Charles could think about—the image of you standing before him, looking at him as though you knew the secrets he hadn’t even dared to ask himself. Charles had barely gotten a word in before you disappeared, leaving him with nothing but more questions.
The park was mostly empty, allowing him and Leo to stroll without the usual flood of cameras or people hoping to get a quick word with him. Charles enjoyed these rare quiet moments, watching Leo run through the grass, capturing photos of him mid-leap, his ears flapping, and his tail wagging in pure delight. For a while, it was peaceful—that is until Leo began barking persistently, his gaze fixed on something in the distance.
“Leo, calme-toi.” Charles called, trying to soothe his normally docile dachshund.
Leo rarely barked at nothing, and Charles couldn’t see what had him all stirred up. As he looked past Leo, his heart skipped. There you were, standing at the edge of the park, just as he had remembered you, dressed in black, untouched by the brightness of the world around you, as if you had stepped from a different realm entirely. Slowly, Charles walked over, kneeling beside Leo, who was still barking.
“Can you see her too, buddy?” Charles asked softly, but Leo only turned his head back towards you.
His barks began shifting into a delighted whine, tail wagging as though greeting an old friend. To Charles’ amazement, Leo took off towards you, bounding across the grass with uncharacteristic excitement. You bent down on one knee as Leo reached you, his small body pressing happily against your touch. Charles just stood there and watched, captivated by the whole sight, how your hand moved over Leo’s fur, and how the dog responded, oblivious to the fact that what he felt was something beyond the ordinary. You then looked up at Charles and smiled, a gentle, knowing expression on your face.
“Hello, little one,” you murmured to Leo, reaching out to stroke him. Your gaze followed Leo’s figure as he trotted back toward Charles. “He’s a beautiful soul. It’s clear how well you take good care of him, he is very happy with this life.”
Charles swallowed, taken aback by the warmth of your words. He felt a huge wave of relief washing over him, and somehow, you were not a figment of his imagination. You were in front of him, speaking to him, your voice soft but firm, grounding him in the reality of your presence.
Noticing a bench nearby, you gestured, “shall we sit?” Charles nodded.
He followed you as you walked, though he kept glancing around as if worried that someone might catch him talking to thin air. The two of you sat side by side, your gaze focused on Leo as he scampered around, while Charles couldn’t seem to look anywhere but at you. The silence between you felt almost sacred, deafening, thick with all the unspoken questions he longed to ask.
“I know you have many questions,” finally, you broke the silence. Your voice was gentle. “Especially as to why you can see me, when others could not.”
Charles let out a shaky breath, nodding. “I—I don’t understand. I’ve seen you before, but you keep on disappearing, and no one else…they never see you.” his voice was a soft murmur, filled with confusion and wonder.
“Our kind, like myself, we’re not meant to be seen by human eyes. We’re here to watch and guide, but only from afar. Most humans only sense us as a passing feeling, a presence.” you softly said, as you studied him with a faint smile. “But in your case, you see me. Truly see me.”
“Why, though? Why am I able to see you?” Charles’ brows furrowed, his gaze intent on yours.
You turned to look at Leo, who was now sitting a short distance away, watching the two of you with a curious tilt of his head, and you couldn’t help but smile at the sight of Leo.
“It’s rare, Charles. But sometimes, there is a connection between our kind to your kind that goes beyond the veil. I’ve thought about it myself, and though I don’t have all the answers, it’s clear that there’s a reason you and I keep crossing paths.”
Charles’ heart raced. The way you spoke, as though fate had woven an invisible thread between you had left him reeling. He glanced around the park, reminded of how strange this conversation must look to anyone passing by, but he did not care at all. The need to understand, to know you, outweighed any risk of prying eyes.
“Maybe…maybe we should go somewhere less public?” Charles suggested, his voice low.
He did not want this moment to end, he couldn’t let you disappear on him again before he had the chance to understand this kind of connection. You looked at him for a long contemplative moment, then nodded.
“All right, lead the way.”
Charles led you quietly through the streets of Monaco and up to his apartment. He hadn’t said much on the way, clearly lost in thought, yet there was an unspoken understanding between the two of you. When you entered his apartment, you immediately noticed how it held an essence of him. Warm, understated, and filled with memories. The walls were decorated with framed photographs spanning his life from childhood karting days to podium celebrations in F1. Trophies were all lined up on the shelf, and each piece seemed to carry a story of its own.
You were drawn to the photos, especially those capturing his relationships, the warm smiles he shared with his family, playful moments with his friends, and candid shots of him and his brothers. Then your gaze settled on one particular photograph, and a bittersweet feeling bloomed within you. It was a younger version of Charles, perhaps in his teens, standing alongside a man whose face you recognize. Jules Bianchi.
Charles noticed the direction of your attention as he finished filling up Leo’s dog bowl, and he stepped over to join you, his expression softening as he saw the photograph. Jules had been so much more than just a mentor to him. The man in that photo had shaped parts of his soul and his dreams. You could feel the weight of Charles’ emotions lingering in the air, a tender ache mixed with recognition.
“You knew him?” Charles’ voice was quiet as he stood beside you.
You nodded softly, your own voice taking on a gentle tone. “I was there in his final moments. I was the one who guided him when he was ready to go, helping him crossover.”
Charles’ face was a mix of expression, caught between surprise and disbelief. For a second, he seemed unable to respond, the information settling slowly. You watched him intently as he took a deep breath, grounding himself.
“You…you spoke to him?” he managed, his voice strained with a mix of sorrow and longing.
“Yes,” you said, your voice steady but tender. “I spoke with his soul as he lingered between here and the afterlife. It was…peaceful. He was calm when I arrived, almost as if he knew he was not going to stay.”
You paused, “I then asked him about his life, what his favorite thing about life was.”
”He told me that his family meant everything to him. He then mentioned being a godfather, and his dreams for his protégé, a young man named Charles.” you added.
“He said that?” he whispered, breath hitched as he instinctively reached up to touch the frame, his fingers resting just over the image of Jules’ face.
“He spoke of you with such pride, with hope that you would go on to achieve everything he had dreamed for you. Jules saw himself in you, Charles. His last thoughts were with his family and you.” you looked at him softly. A quiet rage simmered in Charles’ eyes as he turned to look at you, his voice tinged with frustration.
“But why? Why couldn’t you let his family speak to him, too? They waited for so long, hoping he’d wake up, to say goodbye properly.” the raw pain and anger in his voice were unmistakable.
Charles had not meant to question your intentions, but the loss of Jules had carved a wound that had never fully healed, and in his grief, he momentarily forgot you were not human. You looked at him with a soft, understanding smile, letting the weight of his sorrow wash over you. You had witnessed this kind of reaction before, how those who are grief-stricken often felt deprived of closure.
“I understand, Charles. If I could have done differently, I would have,” you replied, your voice gentle but firm. “But it wasn’t his body I spoke to, it was his soul. Jules was already watching from the other side, beyond the reach of the physical world. In those moments, he wasn’t in his body anymore, he was seeing all of you from a place where time no longer held sway.”
Charles looked down, processing your words, the anger fading slowly as he tried to keep his emotions steady. He tried to reconcile his emotions with the reality of what you had just shared. He ran a hand through his hair, gaze fixed on the floor as he took in a shaky breath.
“So he…he was watching us all along?” he whispered.
“Yes,” you assured him. “He was with you. Every tear, every moment spent beside his hospital bed, he saw it all, even if he himself couldn’t respond in a way you wished for it to be.”
“Souls don’t always leave the way we want them to. They transition gently, often lingering just to be close to the people they love.” you added. Charles’ shoulder slumped slightly, and he let out a shaky sigh, nodding as if finally accepting what had once seemed unimaginable.
“It…it makes sense,” he murmured. “Jules was always calm, even in the most difficult moments. Maybe he knew it would be easier this way.”
There was a peaceful silence that settled between the both of you, the only sound being Leo’s soft footsteps as he padded over to sit by Charles’ feet. Charles looked at you again, the sorrow in his eyes tinted by a glimmer of gratitude.
“Thank you,” he said quietly, a sincerity in his words that touched you deeply. “For…for being there with him, and for telling me.”
You gave him a reassuring nod, feeling the depth of his appreciation. “He is proud of you, Charles. More than you know. You are honoring his legacy every time you step onto the track.”
Charles closed his eyes briefly, absorbing your words, a new sense of peace settling over him. He knew that the ache would remain, but perhaps now, with you there to share this part of Jules’ journey, it would be a little easier to carry.
Eventually, you found yourself seated on the barstool, observing how Charles moved around the kitchen, gathering ingredients as he prepared a dish called pasta, and noting the way he moved with a quiet confidence. He seemed at ease, but you could tell by the occasional glance he cast your way that he was still processing everything. The strange connection he had with you, a Celestial he could see but others could not. As he stirred the sauce on the stove, he broke the silence, glancing over his shoulder with a raised eyebrow.
“So…what exactly are you?” Charles asked, attempting to sound casual, though his curiosity was clear. “Are you like an angel of death or something?” his brows furrowed slightly as he added.
“No, Charles. I’m not here to take you away,” you assured him, tone gentle, and couldn’t help but smile at his suspicion. “Think of me as a guide and a protector. My duty is to help souls cross the afterlife, to make sure that they are not alone and lonely when they cross the other side.”
“So, you’re…you’re not here for me?” he asked, his voice tentative. You could see the worry in his eyes, as if he had been half afraid that he might be speaking with the very spirit that would one day guide him out of this life.
“Not at all,” you replied. “I’m here because, somehow, we have this connection. I was there in the hospital room, with your father, when you saw me for the first time. It was a natural part of my duty, I was waiting to guide him. Just as I was there for Jules.”
“So you only appear when…someone’s close to death?” Charles’ gaze dropped to the countertop, and he nodded slowly, as if piercing it all together.
“Typically, yes,” you replied. “Humans are not meant to see me. They may sense it, a presence, calmness, or even a cool warmth when I’m near, but that’s usually all. So, I could not quite understand why you could see me. It isn’t common.”
“But I can see you.” he said, almost to himself, as if still trying to grasp this phenomenon.
“Exactly.” you looked at him thoughtfully. “Over time, as I have watched over you, you’ve somehow become aware of me. It’s as if the bond between us allowed you to see me when others can’t.”
You let the words hang, hoping it answered the mystery that had puzzled him for so long. Charles turned back to the stove, his movements slower, as if he were allowing himself time to absorb what you had just said. After a moment, he turned to look at you again.
“Back in Singapore…I kept thinking of you, wondering if you were real or just in my head.” he hesitated, then continued. “And you appeared, it was like you sensed me or something.”
“That’s precisely what happened,” a gentle smile crossed your face as you saw the gears turning inside his head. “I could feel your thoughts, your longing to see me, and so I came to you. Your thoughts, they called to me.”
“But why do you always disappear?” he asked, his tone a mix of curiosity and exasperation. “Every time I think I already have you here, you’re gone the second I look away.”
“It’s not by choice, Charles.” you met his gaze, understanding his frustration. “My presence here beside you is not permanent. I have duties beyond just watching over you, it is my duty to guide other people as well. My duty is to help those souls cross peacefully into the afterlife, which means I’m often called away. That’s why I can’t always be here, even if you want me to be.”
“I understand,” he said softly as he looked down, absorbing your words. “It’s…strange, but it does make sense.”
A comfortable silence fell between you and Charles as he took out a plate and transferred the pasta dish on it. You could still feel the wheels turning in his mind as he processed everything. After a moment, you spoke again.
“If you want me to be with you, well, there is a way.” you said.
He looked up at you, now intrigued. “A way?”
You nodded. “Yes. If you light a match or a lighter and call for me, then blow it out, I’ll hear it, and I’ll come to you.”
“Why a match?” Charles’ brows furrowed as he considered it.
“Fire.” you explained. “It is a symbol of transition. It’s an ancient element that is used to connect realms, to call forth spirits, and to bridge the distance between worlds. When you light a match or a lighter, you are creating a momentary flame that connects you to my realm, and when you blow the fire out, it becomes a message—a summons. I’ll hear it, wherever I am.”
“So, I just…call out to you, light a flame, and you’ll come?” Charles’ lips curved into a small smile.
“Yes.” you returned his smile, feeling the warmth in his gaze. “As long as you need me, Charles. Wherever you are, I’ll always find a way to be there.”
Charles looked at you with a mix of gratitude and something deeper, a newfound comfort that seemed to settle over him. In that quiet moment, Charles reached for his fork, but his gaze lingered on you, a newfound clarity softening his features.
“Thank you.” he murmured, voice barely above a whisper.
He then placed a plate of pasta right in front of you, and you tilted your head, looking at the dish with sheer curiosity and slight confusion. Charles noticed your expression, stopping mid-motion as he raised his own fork.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice gentle but genuinely concerned.
“I don’t…eat,” you explained softly, gaze flickering between him and the plate, offering him a small, apologetic smile. “Celestials don’t have the need for food, so I don’t know what it’s like to taste something, let alone pasta.” you could see a flicker of surprise and something that almost looked like offense pass over his face.
“What? You’ve never tasted pasta?” he asked, shocked, as he looked down at his beloved dish, looking genuinely horrified. “Pasta is…it’s comforting, it’s warmth and tradition. It’s something everyone has to try.”
“Okay, imagine this—it’s soft and a little chewy, warm and…kind of like a hug, but for your mouth.” he added, grinning at you with his eyes lighting up. “And with this tomato sauce, its got this balance of sweet and tangy, a bit salty too, it just…makes everything feel better.” his expression softened.
You watched Charles as he spoke, entranced and touched by his earnest attempt to describe something so familiar to him yet so foreign to you. Spending this time with him, watching his animated expression, hearing his heartfelt explanations, you begin to understand why his father and Jules had spoken of him so warmly in their final moments. Charles was not only passionate, but genuinely kind and unpretentiously funny. There was a gentleness to him that touched your heart, even if it couldn’t beat the way a human’s did.
Hours slipped by so fast, and you both found yourselves seated on his living room couch, talking quietly, the evening light fading around you. Charles asked questions after questions, fascinated by your world and by what you do. You answered each one as best as you could, and with each answer, his awe seemed to deepen. You shared stories of guiding other souls, moments of peace and love you had witnessed. He listened, hanging onto each word, and you could see a newfound calmness in his eyes.
While you were in the middle of telling him a story about guiding an elderly woman who had waited until all her children were by her side before letting go, you heard a soft sound. Glancing to your right, you found Charles with his head tipped back against the couch cushion, his breathing steady and calm. He had drifted off, exhaustion settling over him like a soft blanket. For a moment, you just watched him, studying his peaceful face. Charles’ long lashes rested against his cheeks, and a gentle warmth seemed to radiate from him, a stark contrast to the chill you carried with you.
A quiet yearning tugged at you as you lifted a hand, your fingers hovering near his face. You wanted, just once, to feel the warmth of human skin, to know what it was like to truly touch, but you know better. If you let your fingers graze him, he would only feel a cold wisp of air, a reminder that you didn’t belong to this world in the same way as Charles did. So, reluctantly, you lowered your hand and simply looked at him, memorizing the moment.
You had spent nearly the entire day with Charles, and though part of you longed to stay, you knew it was time to leave. Quietly, you stood up from the couch and made your way to where Leo was resting nearby. You knelt down beside the little dachshund, who lifted his head to watch you with those soulful eyes, tail giving a soft wag, and you reached out, your fingers ghosting over his fur.
“Leo, I know that your past life was not kind to you and had been cut short, but you’re safe now. In this life, you’re well taken care of and so loved.” you spoke softly, as Leo seemed to tilt his head, like he understood every word you say. “Charles is a good man, he will love and take care of you, always.”
As you straightened up, Leo continued to watch you, his eyes filled with a sense of understanding. You turned to take one last look at Charles, still asleep on the couch, chest rising and falling in steady rhythm. A soft smile crept over your face as you watched him, there was a wave of warmth washing over you, even without a heartbeat to drive it.
With a final, quiet glance at Leo, who looked back at you with trusting eyes, you let yourself disappear, and slipped back into the unseen world that had always separated you from the people you guided. Yet, for a short moment, you knew you had left a part of yourself with Charles and Leo in that Monaco apartment.
Charles woke up with a dull ache running through his neck, reminding him of the night he had spent sleeping on the couch. He rubbed the sore spot, groaning slightly as he tried to stretch out the stiffness. For a moment, he just sat there, gathering his thoughts, until the memories of last night’s memory surfaced. The conversation, quiet moments, and then the emptiness when he realized you had left. He sat back on the couch, staring at the ceiling as a sense of longing settled over him, a quiet ache that wasn’t so easily stretched away.
A small bark drew his attention to Leo, who was sitting nearby, watching him with an endearing tilt of his head, and noticing Charles’ contemplative state. He smiled and reached out, calling Leo over.
“What do you think, Leo? It was one strange night, huh?” Leo padded over gently, wagging his tail as Charles scooped him up, holding him close.
For a few minutes, Charles simply enjoyed and basked in the warmth of Leo in his arms, the familiar comfort that Leo offered in the midst of all the strange, unexplainable things that he was feeling. Last night had been a fever dream for him, but he knew that it was real, that it happened.
“Do you think it’s strange? Wanting to see her again?” he added. Leo just responded with a quiet, comforting look and nestled close to Charles.
After a while, curiosity began to gnaw at him. Charles could not shake the desire to know more about you, as to why he felt this pull, this connection that seemed impossible and yet so real. He padded into his bedroom, grabbed his laptop and settled in, typing Celestial Angels into the search bar. Countless articles, myths, and even fiction flooded his screen. Charles sifted through several pages, skipping over anything that seemed overly romanticized or far-fetched, until one article caught his eye.
The article spoke of Celestial Angels who formed deep bonds with their humans, describing how they acted as protectors, watchers, and guides. It mentioned the rare connection that could occur, a phenomenon where an angel might become so deeply intertwined with a human soul that they developed a sense of longing or even love, something that was both a blessing and a curse for the Celestial. As he read further, Charles could not help but wonder if this was what he had experienced, if this was the reason he kept seeing you, why he felt such a pull toward you.
Charles then stumbled upon a book: The Celestials by an author named Celestine Williams. The cover featured a faint, ethereal image of a figure wrapped in light, the silhouette barely discernible, much like he imagined you, and the description noted that it explored the stories and folklore surrounding Celestials and their interactions with humans, a deep dive book. The reviews were glowing, a few feedbacks talking about how the book shed light on the mysteries of these beings and the unique connections they could form. Without a second thought, Charles clicked buy, hoping the book would give him a glimpse into your world, something that might help him understand you much better.
Charles then returned his attention back to the article. But his focus kept drifting, thoughts of you had surfaced in his mind unbidden, wondering where you were right now, what you might be doing, if you were watching over someone else or wandering through some hidden place unknown to humans. The pull to see you, to call you, was growing stronger by the second, becoming a quiet ache that settled deep in his chest.
He set the laptop aside, exhaling as he mulled over the idea. Charles remembered what you had told him when he needed you—that he could call you by lighting a match or a lighter, a summon that would draw you to him. He doesn't know if it would even work, or if you would even come, but the need to see you was already overriding any doubts that he has. So he then grabbed a small lighter that he kept somewhere hidden in his kitchen and went to his living room, sitting down on the couch with Leo curled up beside him.
Charles knew it was kind of absurd, like it was something straight out of a fairy tale of a late-night ghost story, but last night, you had told him that if he wanted to see you, all he had to do was light a flame and call out to you. A part of him, the rational side, wanted to shrug it off as nonsense. But then the other part of him had witnessed things that were impossible and felt that strange connection to you, urging him to at least give it a try.
“Am I really fucking doing this?” he murmured, looking down at Leo for approval. But Leo just looked at him, with a face that said ‘what’s the harm in trying?’ “Ah, fuck it.”
Finally, with a deep breath, he flicked the lighter on, watching the tiny flame flame dance as he whispered out to you, a barely audible plea for you to return. The flame flickered as he called out to you, then he blew it out gently, his eyes lingering on the wisp of smoke that rose and faded. His heart was pounding, unsure if should expect an immediate response or if he had simply made a wish to the empty air.
A hush settled over the quiet living room, and for a moment, nothing really happened. Charles felt a pang of disappointment, even a touch of embarrassment at how eager he was and had hoped. He let out a disheartening chuckle, letting out a quiet sight right after, and lowering the lighter, thinking that maybe he had been mistaken or that the depth of the bond he felt was just his pure imagination.
Just as he stood up, about to return the lighter back into the kitchen, Charles felt a shift in the air, a delicate, almost undetectable shimmer, like a faint breeze brushing across his skin. He looked up, and there you were, standing in the soft morning light, an almost imperceptible glow framing your presence. The world seemed to pause, the weight of the day fading away as he took in the sight of you. You stood there, a soft, otherworldly light around you, the faintest hint of warmth in your eyes as you looked at him. Charles felt his breath hitching, he had not realized how much he missed seeing you until now. He began feeling a strange mix of relief and happiness.
“You called for me?” you asked softly, your voice like a distant melody.
Charles nodded, suddenly feeling a little bit embarrassed, but unable to look away at you. “I…I did, I hope it’s okay. I just…” he paused, fumbling over his words. “I wanted to see if it works, and to see you again. I don’t know why, but I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
“You’re allowed to call for me, Charles. That’s why I told you how you can reach for me.” you smiled gently, a warmth in your expression that seemed to reach him despite your distance.
“I’ve been reading about Celestial Angels, trying to understand.” he let out a soft chuckle, placing his hands inside of his pockets, feeling uncharacteristically vulnerable. “I came across all these stories about angels who…form connections with their humans.” Charles looked down, collecting his thoughts.
“I guess I just wanted to understand what we have. Why do you keep on appearing, and why does it feel like I know you, even though I don’t really.” he added.
“The connection between an angel and their human isn’t something that happens every day. It’s rare, something beyond explanation.” your expression softened, and took a slow step forward, closing the gap between you. “We’re not supposed to form attachments, but sometimes, it’s as if the universe allows it, just for a moment.”
“So…it’s real, then? I’m not imagining it at all?” his gaze never leaving you, but filled with curiosity.
“No, Charles,” you shook your head. “You’re not imagining it. It’s real. You were always different, even from the first time I saw you.”
“I don’t know what this all means, but I want to understand.” he let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, voice quiet, and a raw honesty was lacing his tone as he held your gaze.
“Sometimes, understanding isn’t possible, not in a way humans desire. Some things simply are.” you said quietly.
You then placed a hand near his, close enough that Charles could almost feel your presence, but not quite touching. The silence stretched, rich and weighty, filled with words left unsaid. Finally, he managed a faint smile.
“Thank you. For you know, for coming.” Charles said softly.
“For you, I always will.” you replied, smiling at him.
taglist : @charlesgirl16 , @chloes-book-corner , @wierdflowerpower
#f1#formula 1#formula one#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc 16#cl16#charles leclerc x celestial!reader#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc x reader#cl16 x reader#cl16 x you#cl16 x female reader#cl16 imagine#cl16 series#cl16 x y/n#cl16 one shot#cl16 fic#cl16 fanfic#charles leclerc fic#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc series#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc one shot
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Recently, I’ve been feeling a strong urge to write fanfiction, but as a Japanese person, I can’t help but feel the immense barriers of language and cultural differences standing in my way.
I’ve always loved writing fanfiction and have more experience as a writer than as an artist. But I don’t know any English at all. The Japanese short story collection about Seb and Omi that I posted on AO3 over a year ago still has zero bookmarks (which isn’t surprising 😂). In other words, as someone who can only write in Japanese, my value as a writer in this fandom is practically zero. I have so many stories I want to tell, but since I can’t speak English, I can’t even stand at the starting line 🤣🤣🤣. Even if I started studying English intensively now, it would probably take years before I could write stories in English on my own 🤣.
On top of that, I only have a Japanese perspective shaped by Japanese values and ways of thinking. For someone like me, it’s impossible to depict Western characters’ personalities, thoughts, and actions without them feeling off. The more I read fanfiction written by Western authors in this fandom, the more I realize how significantly values and ways of thinking differ between Japan and the West. I notice these differences so often that I’m genuinely shocked. With art or comics, I can at least visually mask these cultural discrepancies to some extent, but with novels, where detailed psychological descriptions are key, there’s no way to gloss over these differences.
Foolishly, I’ve been thinking about translating my stories using ChatGPT, just as I do with comic dialogues. But even with AI tools, translation takes an enormous amount of time. And more importantly, translating between Japanese and English is incredibly difficult—no matter how advanced modern tools like DeepL or ChatGPT are, they can’t produce truly accurate translations. This fandom is already filled with amazing, beautifully written stories in natural English. So who would ever want to read a poorly translated story in unnatural English produced by tools like ChatGPT or DeepL? 🤣🤣🤣
With art or comics, I know that I can improve with practice. But when it comes to mastering English and capturing the nuances of cultural values, no matter how hard I try, I will always fall short compared to Western creators. I recently became painfully aware of this reality, and now I feel so sad and empty. Even so, I can’t suppress this foolish urge to write stories. Someone, please give me the final push to give up on writing fiction 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣.
(I couldn’t find the right term, so I used the word “Western” in this text. But I do understand that there are many people in the West who aren’t fluent in English, and that cultural values differ greatly from country to country.) (And to all the non-native English writers who work hard and create amazing stories, I have the utmost respect for you.)
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Author Recommendations
This post will be updated as I remember more people - I never saved anything about what I read. If you want yourself removed from this list - let me know! No problem! But keep in mind this list was made for me to keep track of my favourites and as acknowledgment of people that I look up to, as I strive to be as good as them. Also, if I did, I interacted with you using my main blog, not this one. DM me if you need anything. Thank you, all!
@plutotheplum Has amazing chemistry while writing any character. She brings out genuine interactions without feeling too unrealistic, you'll read without realizing how into it you are, like in a trance. Everytime I read something that takes me out instantly, I know it's hers. @rose-tinted-kalopsia Is a very sweet person with a very obvious Xavier preference, her blog is beautiful - she makes it very impressive how much effort she puts into it - and everything she writes is in-character and cherry-picked to tug at your heart. Also, she's constantly panicking and that's very cute. Take a look! @dollgxtz Is an incredible writer with a gut-wrenching ongoing series called 'His watchful eye', responsible for me kicking my feet at 3am when I should be sleeping. Her writing makes me think she shouldn't be posting it for free. Also a sweetheart. @comatosebunny09 Currently on semi-hiatus, they only write for Sylus - keep that in mind. Their blog is amazing, very organized! Everything they write leaves you wanting more, so even though they have a lot of available stories, you'll read it all in no time. @monster-effer I really hope she starts writing more. The way she does it is very unique, in a way that everything is well-described, but nothing is too much to read. It is all very natural - you'll know what i'm talking about when you take a look at her blog! @peachylynnie Well. One day I decided to binge on her blog and accidentally left too many comments - sorry guys I'm addicted to supporting talented people - and her work makes me squeal EVERYTIME for a reason or another. God, it's all so good! (╥﹏╥) @h4venpha We have another Sylus fan here, and they write him extremely in-character. I like all of their works with no exception, always making me turn off my phone to recollect myself. I'd read everything they write even if they were a worm. (writing in wormish).
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XAVIER
This is the closest place to the sky. It's also the closest we can be to the stars. Many people say that you can hear the echoes of destiny here.
As the wind sweeps across the land, I see many things are being forgotten as the seconds pass... . Those memories float in the distant starry sea or sink into the sands of time. Like light slipping through our fingers, they'll scatter and become a faded remnant in the world.
Yet everything about you becomes clearer. Your sorrows, your joys, your body... And your soul... From the moment we first met, I treasured these memories in the depths of my heart. They've always shined brilliantly.
Here. I wrote you a letter. I cast an anchor into time and space to mark the moment of me writing these words and you reading them. I believe this tiny anchor will join the stars. It will serve as a guide for our paths. No matter how many times we travel through the vast, uncertain universe, we'll always meet, converge, and intertwine.
ZAYNE
I traveled across the Arctic to reach this hidden realm of ice and snow. The snow season here lasts for six months. Time itself seems to be frozen, and the pausing of seasons has become imperceptible.
A small cabin serves as my shelter on this desolate snowfield. When night descends, a small, warm light glows. I sit by the window and watch the snow fall.
And once the snow stopped, an aurora appeared. Fairy-tale colors spilled onto the sky. The snowy landscape transformed into a dreamland's ornament and settled into a peaceful slumber. Everything seems to have stopped moving... I desperately want to tell you about — The way the snow sparkles in colorful hues under the aurora. The way pinks rays melt and blend with the white horizon at dawn. And how the snow surrenders to a gentle caress of orange light at dusk. Snow and ice wait for these colors. Then all of them merge to write a winter poem that describes varying emotions.
I remember how we were nestled together to witness the night and the breaking dawn. We walked through all four seasons. They were as colorful and diverse as these shimmering snowscapes. I recorded every moment. So when you receive this, please join me in unsealing a poem about us.
RAFAYEL
In a land of romance, I'm on a journey to find inspiration.
Accompanied by the gentle sea breeze, the ocean reveals its varying hues under the sun. It carries emotions that are complex and endearing. It's just like when you pretend to be upset. You frown, but the corner of your lips curve ever so slightly.
The town is full of life. Scents, sounds, and colors merge into magical combinations around me. They're just like those fairy-tale dreams we've experienced.
When I got home, people told me that the buildings near this small post office housed a magnificent art collection. I wonder... Who were the muses that inspired those creators? For me... There has been only one answer to this kind of question. Every landscape becomes extraordinary because of you. And the inspiration they bring bursts forth and falls onto me like a wave lapping against the shore.
This letter contains all the amazing discoveries I've witnessed on my journey. And from this moment onward, I'm looking forward to the adorable expression you'll make when you receive this.
SYLUS
Do you see this valley? According to an old legend, a dragon was slain and buried here.
For countless years, the wind and the wings of birds carried that dragon's tale. It has passed through the lips of the travelers who find themselves here. Taurus City... I suspect you've already forgotten about it. Like that legend, our story is hidden in the valley. It can also be found... in the written records kept by the locals.
And here stands the oldest post office in the world. People believe in this immeasurable power of written words. They put their feelings and stories onto paper before using messengers to send them away.
It's a wonderful way to connect with others. I wrote you a letter for the first time, and a new bond was forged between us.
It won't be long until this letter stars its journey. You'll receive it one way or another. But perhaps it might idle on its path for a while. In any case, it will ride the howling winds and soar with traveling birds to bring you my sort... and reveal everything that I am and will every be.
NEW YEAR'S LADS LETTERS
XAVIER, ZAYNE, RAFAYEL, SYLUS
#📒˚₊‧ dear diary .ᐟ#i did this for you ir1desc3nce#hope you like it :3#LMFAO i did xavier's on mobile and like the first paragraph of zayne's#SO HARD TO DO i cant even zoom in on a picture if im reblogging/editing it#the rest wasnt to bad bc i did it on desktop#but damn i had a hard time for a couple words#as someone who is rafayel biased#i will say that i think xavier's is the best#def the most romantic and just 'damn'#love and deepspace#love and deepspace xavier#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace rafayel#love and deepspace sylus#xavier x reader#zayne x reader#rafayel x reader#sylus x reader#xavier love and deepspace#zayne love and deepspace#rafayel love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#xavier#zayne#rafayel#sylus#mizzfizz ⋆˚࿔
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~ Lilo's 2024 Star Wars recs ~ (another Ao3 year in review)
This is specifically the star wars edition of my reader year in review, the rest & more info can be found here!
Descriptions/summaries by me, click the links for the ones from the authors.
The Good Sith by sonnyrain - Obi-Wan Kenobi and all of the Vod'e time travel and end up on a Sith planet. Obi-Wan, now 'Aranar', turns to the dark side, swearing to protect his men no matter the cost. Over a million words, lots of plot and character developments, fix-everything, still ongoing as of mid last year but you can read the first part(s) on their own.
I love this fic a ridiculous amount, I read several parts at least twice, and I'm thinking about it constantly. Like, when I think up my plotless little fluff piece fix everything bedtime stories I think up to fall asleep (and sometimes when something's good have to forego sleep to write down immediately because I know I won't remember fuckall come morning), I think of the versions of the characters from that 'verse just as often as I think of canon star wars characters or ones from any other fics. It fits into my headcanon 'verse really well because I always work with multiverse settings, and I love the kid characters especially little Sithling Aurek and his twin Soul.
Knives and Spices by argentee, mikaiyawa and others: A whole group of humans from earth is kidnapped into the Star Wars world, and separate fics follow separate characters. One becomes Mandalorian, one a pop star, yet another befriends some pirates and travels to lands we've never seen in canon. 280k, ratings and warnings vary, series still ongoing, parts can be read separately
I love and adore all kinds of self insert stories but this one is just extra levels of amazing - it's basically humans are space orcs meets Star Wars, and humans are all a bit force sensitive - the ending of the series summary describes it perfectly: "how much trouble can a few humans cause? All of it. All the trouble." and I love it all to bits!
Like a Tree by the River by @bairnsidhe - at Galidraan, Komari has a vision of the canon future and decides that she'd rather leave the Jedi behind than be a part of that massacre. Somehow, this ends with her and Dooku being adopted by mandalorians, and her in turn kind of adopting teenaged Obi-Wan at Melida/Daan? 20k T
Idk, this isn't even such a long one and I mean all of BairnSidhe's works I've read are great but somehow specifically this one with Dooku being the 'a bit old' ad and Komari therefore the bu'ad of a random coruscanti Mandalorian just stuck with me and I sometimes randomly think of Dooku being all confused and have to smile xD the plot&writing is also really good!
How a Romance Novel Saved the Galaxy by @arianaderalte: The mandos get their hands on a novel that describes a romance between mandalorians and jedi, and just how perfect jedi really are as partners for mandalorians... This changes things when both groups interact irl. 200k, rated T, Violence
This series has Everything. Jedi, Mandalorians, action, relationships, all kinds of queerness, and excerpts from a romance novel about the ancient Sith wars. Honestly, this fic just couldn't be better! I binge-read through it in one go even though I should have done a million other things at the time and I didn't regret it one bit xD
All the Amavikka stories: the slaves on Tatooine have a separate secret culture with language, myths and names, and Anakin, coming from this culture, reacts to Palpatine being his newest slave master
I think this idea of Tatooine slave culture and of Anakin's characterization is so interesting and I love reading it, from long Double Agent Vader by @fialleril, which I think is the original fic creating the Ekkreth lore, over the ongoing series Biting His Own Tale by @adragonsfriend, to the short story I can't find anymore about depur erecting a tower, a song-fic to Babylon by Dirt Poor Robin and the reason for my obsession with that band - please, if anyone has a link, send it my way! - and all other fics, I love this trope so much!
I think Ekkreth Skywalker was one of the first trope rabbit holes I stumbled into when I got really into Star Wars longfics in the middle of 2024, and I'm always excited to see references to it in fics mainly about other characters as well, like Breaking Chains by @jehanneargentee, and I went back to (re)reading fics about the trope on purpose several times as well :)
The last fic leads neatly into the next trope I really loved this year, Time Travel stories, more specifically Obi-Wan Kenobi time travelling and meeting mandalorians :D
I don't really have more specific stories for this one, I read so so so many of them that they just blur together in my mind. I marked a couple with the Ao3 rec function so I assume I liked those especially much, but going through them now I still don't really remember much, but I do recognize a couple fic author names as authors I read many good fics from, Ariel_Sojourner AppoApples @batshieroglyphics @roosjem LeeTheHobbit @triscribe cjwritesfanficnow @laurabwrites y'all's are awesome! Everyone, go check out all their fics!
I do also read and enjoy stories where people other than Obi-Wan travel through time, one that really stuck with me is In Good Time by morwen_of_gondor, about the Mandalorian trainers Kal Skirata and Walon Vau time travelling back to their time on Kamino.
All the fluffy h/c, fix-it, everyone lives, no order 66 Clone Wars fics! Pro-jedi, pro-clones, anti-sith (which sometimes includes Anakin, sometimes not), usually focusing on the 212th.
I never watched the series and it's been ages since I watched Attack of the Clones, but somehow, probably on the time travel -> Obi-Wan fics -> General Kenobi pipeline, I ended up reading a loooot of clone wars (fix it) fic, specifically lots and lots of Codywan!
You know that lovely feeling of getting into a new fandom without having any preconceived notions or otps or anything, so you can read All The Fic without any ships or bashing squicking you out? Yeah, that was me in Star Wars several months ago, cursed be the Codywan that got to me xD I can barely read time travel fics anymore without mourning the existence of the Vod'e because changing the past usually means they won't be created (unless they're the ones time travelling of course. Love those fics) and where I used to read just about anyone x Obi-Wan (and also anyone x anybody else lmao), I'm not pretty exclusively into Codywan... That being said, there's a reason for that, and that's the amount of amazing fics for that ship that I came across!
Again, I don't have specific fics that I remember because I just read so many one after the other... I guess I'll have to re-read them all. Which is great actually because me not remembering them much means I can reread them basically for the first time! I did mark some as rec but looking through them now I think they're not mainly recced for the codywan... My shippy bookmark tag might give a better overview.
Another ship I got into was clone troopers Waxer x Boil, I like the thought of the Vod'e being a society of to outsiders identical looking but to each other separate people who only see their immediate batchmates as siblings (which would also psychologically make a lot more sense), and these two are just super cute.
One of the first Waxer/Boil fics I read is also Codywan and it's one of these clones&Obi-Wan time travel fics I like so much :D The 212th Attack Battalion's Guide to Saving the Galaxy by Accident by @antigrav-vector and @quarra, it also has some Dooku/Sifo-Dyas which is another ship I really like.
Another one I still want to continue reading is RCAU: Open Skies mainly by @cacodaemonia, what I've seen of it so far is great and the story is So Long (almost 900k, a honestly daunting wordcount and probably what made me procrastinate continuing it, but also Awesome because So Much Fic), it's cute and shippy and no order 66 but also has plot and interesting characters and ocs and I just love it <3
Also similar but less ship centric, I absolutely love all the fics where Fox gets to kill Palpatine. Just, best trope ever. The Corrie Guard deserves a little Sith Murder. As a treat.
Jaster Mereel and his haat'ade (True Mandalorians), there are a bunch of really good ones where they rescue Obi-Wan and the Young from Melidaan, but also in general all the Jaster fics are great!
While I'm very anti guns irl I just love the fictional Mandalorian culture xD with their cool armor and their codex and the language (per my last count I know 90 words of Mando'a just from fic reading osmosis, send me an ask if you want a list lmao), the vibrant culture created by it being a creed, not one species... and Jaster is just my favorite Mando'ad ever, maybe because he doesn't have much canon attached so fanon just went wild? xD there are also a bunch of jedi shippy fics with him and Dooku sometimes in ot3 with Sifo-Dyas, or him and Jon Antilles like the wonderful 100k wip trade your heart for bones to know by @blackkatmagic, and I think there was one with time travelling adult Obi-Wan as well - edit: yes several, by @roosjem @cjwritesfanficnow @batshieroglyphics <3
Skywalker Family Values by Ariel_Sojourner: Sith-son Luke and senator daughter Leia end up in the same summer camp, it ends in a destruction of the speciist camp, a rebellious theatre performance and the reintroduction of their parents... Aka the parent trap/ Doppelte Lottchen AU that is still somehow perfectly in tune with the Star Wars world! 55k, T for violence.
Can't forget the fic that actually got me into Star Wars! At least I'm pretty sure this is the one? I think there was a tumblr post talking about crackfic ideas for a parent trap AU, and I went looking and found this one, which is actually 100% serious and such a good read. I actually made my mom read it as well xD Das Doppelte Lottchen (German original parent trap book from 1949) was one of our favs for her to read to me when I was a kid, and my mom is always looking for new reading material and as I'm mainly reading fanfic, I'm always happy to find fic she'll also like.
And, because I turn everything into a tag meme, maybe some of you also want to show your appreciation for the writers who got us through the last year - everyone who sees this, feel free to make your own post (if it's just Star wars fic I guess you can reblog-add to this one, but otherwise seriously make your own post)! and remember to leave your authors some comments especially if they can't be @-ed on tumblr :) tagging all the authors already tagged above and everyone else who sees this!
here's my 2024 rec list for other fandoms
more of my fic recs • my writing • my Star Wars • Star Wars fic recs
#ao3 wrapped#a fic writer's tumblr account#lilo writes fic recs#lilo reads#jan'24#my post#mine#my star wars#long post#star wars fic rec#star wars fic recs#star wars#codywan#obi wan kenobi#Commander cody#jaster mereel#amavikka#star wars time travel#mandalorians#clone wars
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Our Latest Book Club Meeting
[Before we begin: Rook is a Qunari Shadow Dragon with some self-worth issues going on]
Attending: Bellara, Neve, Harding, Lucanis, Emmrich (also Taash, and Davrin, sort of)
Book: Adventures of Dolor the Daring, Volume 48, by I. L. Literatus (chosen by Neve)
Notes taken by: Bellara
Notes:
Bellara (me) was quite surprised (and also excited!!!) that Neve chose a crime serial, as she seemed skeptical about those before
Neve admitted that she selected the book not for the plot, not really (though she was complimentary of it, especially Dolor’s final confrontation with the corrupt magister), but because she suspects the author might be… Rook!
Lucanis was first to break the stunned silence afterwards; asked why she thinks that
“Any excuse to hear me talk, hmm, Lucanis?” oh this one is good, must write that down Neve explained that it’s “rather suspicious how the mysterious I. L. Literatus took an extended break from writing the moment we all got tangled up in Solas’ mess, and then showed up again, just as Rook got injured in that fight with the Antaam and had to take a bit of downtime”
Bellara (me) pointed out that it could be a coincidence (mostly to try and ground myself for disappointment, because WOULDN’T IT BE INCREDIBLE IF ONE OF MY FAVORITE PEOPLE WROTE ONE OF MY FAVORITE SERIALS). Sorry
Harding joined in; recalled how the rooftop chase between two burning buildings was almost an exact match for how she, Rook and Varric hurried to rescue Neve on the day when… things happened. Down to the shortcuts they took!
Neve added another detail: apparently, she and Rook were once looking for clues in Docktown, and Rook paused to look up at the sky and say that it looked like a “miserable grey towel that the black claws of the Archon’s palace would not stop wringing”. This was the same description as in the serial’s opening scene! Neve never forgets a thing, she is amazing
Lucanis conceded: he was more convinced now. Realized that “Scorpion”, a mysterious cloaked figure who helps Dolor investigate evil mages, might have been inspired by Viper.
Bellara (me) also realized something! Viper is in the story, but Tarquin isn’t! That’s because the Venatori already know about him, from rumors at least, so mentioning him in a serial in passing would not compromise him… But nobody knows about Tarquin! Rook is protecting him!
Taash was passing by on their way upstairs; but stopped and said, more or less (with a lot more “vashedan” thrown in): “Nah, I read a couple those. Hid them in my Advanced Qunlat textbook so I’d look smart when my mother checked on me. That can’t be Rook. Dolor is nonbinary too, but Lit-Whatsit keeps saying that they always knew who they were, were always confident about that. Rook wasn’t always confident. They struggled, like me.”
Neve disagreed. Noted that Dolor might not be a one-on-one copy of Rook, but an idealized version with all the “right” feelings Rook wished they had. Also listed all the places where Dolor gets excited to play their role as a fighter against cultists and blood mages, and the city’s protector. They are human, an everyday citizen of Minrathous who fits in so very well among everyone… But that’s a very Qunari way of putting it. And that’s something that always bothered Rook.
Some notes had to be copied over at this point, because the “OH!” sound Harding made toppled over some of our mugs, and they spilled all over the paper! Maybe the stone floor reacted to her? No harm done, really! (Harding, stop worrying)
Harding put things together and asked Neve if I. L. Literatus, or Illiteratus, means anything in Tevene. Neve confirmed it means what it sounds like in Trade: Illiterate. Rook must have a very low opinion of their writing skills (doodle of a sad Bellara face)
Davrin (??? He said he wouldn’t be joining, he had more important things to do, like train Assan??? But there he was???) walked (or sauntered! sauntered is a good word! swaggered even!) up to the table. Asked: “If the author is Rook, and Dolor is Rook but without all their worst thoughts, then what do we make of Flosculus?”
On Flosculus! Bellara (me that is, it’s getting awkward talking in third person for so long) wrote this down while there was another long, long pause. He is a new character that just got introduced in this volume. An older lowborn mage that worked hard to earn a place in the Minrathous Circle, despite the contempt from the greedy, cruel Altus nobles that Dolor usually defeats on their adventures. He is very tall, only a “hand’s length” below an average Qunari warrior (which is just about the height difference between Rook and Emmrich), and his face “might have been fairly good-looking when he was younger, but was chiseled into an elegant, dignified handsomeness with age… Truly, time had treated him with the same kindness as he treated those around him”. I really liked him; he does remind me a lot of Emmrich, with his love for flowers, and his wealth of advice on all things arcane, and his eagerness to see the best in people… And you (well, me at least) can’t help but notice how the story, which is usually all about magic duels and human sacrifices and screaming matches with crazy cultists on top of piles of bones, grows softer whenever he is on the page. Like stepping in from a hailstorm to a cozy room with a burning hearth. But then… then, at the very end of the volume, Dolor realizes that they have been developing a crush on him, and decides never to tell him about it because he does not like them back. Which the author praises them for because it’s “the right thing to do”. Dolor always knows the right thing to do.
Book club meeting adjourned here. No dice were thrown to decide who’s next. Because Emmrich, first very pale and then very pink, got up without a word and ran off somewhere.
THAT BETTER BE TOWARDS ROOK’S ROOM!
Sorry.
#dragon age#da:tv#emmrook#bellara lutare#neve gallus#lace harding#lucanis dellamorte#taash#davrin#emmrich volkarin#rook mercar#original things
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Unspoken Words pt 4
Master List
Characters: Jensen Ackles x Reader, Reader’s daughter, other characters
Warnings: a little angst, SMUT, fluff
A/N: Another collab story with @cheekygirl2309. This one is about a single mother with a nonverbal autistic daughter who loves Supernatural. The reader is going to a Supernatural Convention with her daughter and things unfold from there. The daughter character is near and dear to my heart. I have someone very close to me who is nonverbal, but he’s such an amazing kid.
**This chapter has the reader and Jensen taking their relationship to the next level.**
This is a work of fiction and does not depict real life. Jensen is single in this story.
All work is my own and @cheekygirl2309, don’t take it or use it as your own. Reblogs and likes are appreciated.
Minors DNI 18+
A few hours later Lily was in her room on the pediatric floor and Jensen was back. Sarah and Steve had stopped by to check on us and bring some food.
Lily was curled up on Jensen’s lap watching Supernatural and holding onto his shirt for dear life. I sat in the chair beside the bed, glancing between the television and them.
My heart was so full of love for him. He treated her like she was his daughter and didn’t hesitate to come when I called.
Lily eventually fell asleep and Jensen carefully climbed out of the bed to stretch. I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. Then a pang of guilt started to creep in. He didn’t ask for this. We were just fans that came into his life and now here he is in a hospital room with me and my daughter.
I looked at him and saw how tired he was. I wanted to talk to him, so I took a deep breath. “Jensen, you don’t have to stay here. Please don’t feel obligated to stay. She’ll be fine if you’re not here when she wakes up. I know you’re tired and you have other commitments.”
Jensen looked at me and walked over to me, taking me by the hands and pulling me up, “Y/N, I don’t have any other commitments. Right here, right beside you is where I should be. Here with my girls. I’m not leaving you alone in this.” He placed a tender kiss on my forehead and I just nodded.
The nursing staff and doctors were incredible. They checked on Lily and asked Jensen and I if we needed anything. They helped us convert the chair in the room into the bed it changed into. I slept on the bed with Lily and Jensen slept in the chair/bed.
By the fourth day in the hospital, Lily’s fever broke and we were being released to go home. They still had no idea why she was sick, the doctor classified it as a fever of unknown origin.
We got the discharge papers, and we headed home. I was thankful for my own bed, and I know Lily was excited to be back home in familiar surroundings.
In the hospital she barely spoke. It worried me, because before she was starting to communicate more. Now it seems as though the switch flipped again. Jensen told me not to worry about it too much, she’d talk again when she was ready. He always had a way of calming me down.
After we got home Lily got back into her routine of playing, watching her favorite show and her new favorite thing, snuggling with Jensen.
He didn’t seem to mind. She’d curl up between us and lay her head on his lap or his side and put her feet on me.
She’d play with her stuffies while he and I would talk. Tonight was no different. I made dinner and we all three ate. After dinner I gave Lily a bath, checked her temperature for the hundredth time, and got her ready for bed.
She grabbed a book and took it to Jensen. “Do you want me to read this to you, Lily?” She didn’t respond verbally, she just grabbed his hand and led him to her room.
He sat beside her, tucked her in, gave her a kiss on her head and read the story. I stood at the door watching them. As he sat beside her I noticed her hand kept drifting from her stuffy to Jensen’s arm, then back again.
When the book was done, she was fast asleep. He kissed her head softly and we left the room.
The two of us went to the kitchen. I grabbed him a beer and I poured myself a glass of wine. The stress from the past few days was weighing on me and I was worried about Jensen.
“Jensen, you know you don’t have to stay the night. You’ve barely been home since Tuesday. She’s going to be okay, and I know if I need you, you’ll be here.”
He sat his beer down, grabbed my wine glass and set it down. Then pulled me onto his lap, “Sweetheart, I know I don’t have to stay. I want to. I want to be here with you and Lily. You two mean so much to me.”
I crashed my lips onto his without thinking. At that moment I wanted nothing more than him. His lips, his hands, his body. All of him, I wanted, no I needed him.
His hands gripped my fleshy hips tightly. I knew I’d have bruises tomorrow, but I didn’t care. I moaned against his mouth as his hands delicately danced up my spine.
Jensen’s hands found their way to my supple breasts and my body arched forward on instinct. His fingers played with the hem of my shirt, and I pulled back from his lips and pulled my shirt over my head with one pull.
Jensen smirked, “Damn sweetheart.” His lips trailed down my neck, over my collarbone, and down to the tops of my bra covered breasts. Leaving kisses and love bites as he trailed down my body.
My pulse was pounding in my ears and the arousal shot through my body like I’d never felt. Every inch of my body tingled with anticipation. Every nerve ending electrified at his touch.
My arousal grew as my panties became soaked. My lips ghosted his, “Jensen, let’s take this to the bedroom.” I lightly kissed his lips and when I pulled back my bottom lip was between his teeth.
His eyes dark with lust and desire, making me feel like I could cum right there.
Jensen helped me up and we raced to the bedroom. As soon as the door closed, Jensen was on me again. His strong arms laid me down on the bed, caging me between the mattress and him.
He stood up and removed his shirt. I heard his belt and I sat up, helping him remove his belt.
My hand lightly brushes against his member, pulling a hiss from his lips. He wasn’t completely hard yet, but damn he was already so big. I bit my lip with anticipation.
He pulled his pants down, leaving him in nothing but his boxers. Our chests heaving with excitement as we looked at each other, knowing we were dangerously close to crossing a line that can’t be uncrossed.
I slid my hands behind my back and removed my bra. When my breasts sprang free from the confines of the material, Jensen growled.
I laid back as he kissed down my torso, licking and sucking each nipple and he kissed down to my navel.
He stopped at the top of my jeans and looked down at me. I nodded. He unzipped my pants and pulled them and my panties off. I grabbed the blanket to cover up, but Jensen took it away.
“No, don’t. I want to see your beautiful body.” I blushed as Jensen kissed down my body. His hands found their way between my thighs and he parted them slowly. He stopped, looked up at me and said, “Are you sure about this? We don’t have to go any further. I don’t want to rush this.”
I nodded, “Jensen, I want you. All of you, if you’re ready, I’m ready.” His lips found mine again, “I’m ready too, sweetheart.”
His fingers parted my wet folds and slid inside me. Hooking up he found that sweet spot. The contact made me arch my hips off the bed and I moaned his name softly like a prayer.
Jensen’s thumb rubbed my clit, soft delicate circles at first, then as his fingers thrusted more, his thumb rubbed a little harder. I was panting and a moaning mess under him.
It had been years since a man touched me, and damn was he good at it. “Oh god, right there Jensen! Fuck! I’m so close.” He sped up, “Yes baby, cum on my fingers. Let me feel you come undone.” I came with a scream of his name as my fingers dug into his arms.
His lips crashing on mine to muffle the sound of my scream. He smirked against my mouth, “You’ve got to keep it down sweetheart, you don’t want to wake up Lily.”
My chest was rising and falling fast as I tried to steady my breath. Jensen stood and I saw his cock fully hard through his boxers.
He slid them down and the sight of him almost made me cum again. I licked my lips and then pulled my bottom lip in between my teeth.
“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll be gentle.” He grabbed a condom from his jeans and opened the package.
I leaned up and helped him put it on. Sliding the rubber down the length of his thick shaft. Watching how the thin latex stretched to accommodate his girth and length.
The condom was completely unrolled when I reached the bottom of his shaft. My cheeks flushed red and my breath hitched.
His eyes met mine, dark green with so much lust and desire. “Are you ready?” I nodded, not able to trust my voice.
I slid up until my head reached the pillows and I felt the bed dip down as Jensen positioned himself between my legs. His hands gently pushed my legs apart as he moved closer to me.
Our eyes locked on each other as Jensen slowly guided himself in. I felt his engorged tip pushing past my soaked entrance and the initial contact made me gasp.
Jensen slowly pushed in, taking his time. My hands switched from gripping the sheets beside me to holding on to him. I felt every inch of him, stretching me and pushing further into me.
My walls are tight around him, like our bodies were made for each other. It was painful in the most amazing way. His lips found mine as he bottomed out. Pulling a moan from both of our mouths.
My grip on his shoulders tight as he brought his hips back slightly and then forward again. His pace was steady and rhythmic as the sounds of moans and pleasure filled the bedroom.
Jensen’s body hovered over mine as our hips connected over and over again. His lips finding mine and leaving trails of love bites down my neck. I felt worshipped and desired.
Our hands held onto each other as Jensen’s pace picked up more. I was close again, feeling his length brush against my g-spot and his head touching my cervix. He could feel it too.
“Go ahead baby, let go for me. Cum for me again.” My body responding to his commands, I came again. My walls clenched around him with an unyielding grip. He moaned loudly.
His pace picked up and his hips slammed into mine faster. He was close. Jensen kissed me with more fervor and I felt his cock twitch as his hips bucked into mine. He came with a groan.
Before he pulled out, he kissed me again and stood. Jensen walked to the bathroom, removed the condom and returned to the bed with a washcloth to clean us both up.
Tossing the cloth to the side, he crawled in bed and pulled me close to him. “That was incredible, Y/N.” My cheeks flushed and my breath still trying to steady I nodded and snuggled closer to his chest.
“Jensen, that was amazing. You were amazing.” The two of us laid in each other’s arms in silence for a while. Then Jensen broke the silence, “You sure you’re okay? I didn’t hurt you did I?”
I looked up at him, his green eyes full of concern, “No Jensen, you didn’t hurt me at all.” I placed a soft kiss on his lips. “I love you.” I whispered softly.
I felt Jensen’s body tense beside me and my brain’s euphoric moment came crashing down. Oh shit! I just said I love you and he tensed up. Oh god, I just messed this up. This is too much too fast.
Panic filled my body and I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t take it back, because let’s be honest, I didn’t want to. I meant it, but dammit why did I have to say it out loud.
The two of us laid there in silence. I could feel the tension in his body and it was still hanging in the air. I just screwed all of this up. I knew I did. My heart pounded in my chest and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to cry or throw up.
I slowly pulled away from him and felt his grip on me loosen. I grabbed the sheet and wrapped it around me and went into the bathroom.
Using the blanket I muffled my sobs. I just ruined all of this. I ruined it for me, but worst of all I ruined it for Lily.
Despair and regret filled my body. I washed my face and pulled on some clothes. When I walked back into the bedroom I saw Jensen pulling on his pants.
My heart shattered. “Hey, I’m gonna head home to check on the house. I’ll um, see you later.” I swallowed hard, a lump forming in my throat and a hole in my heart. “Oh, okay. I’ll see you later then.”
I couldn’t look at him and he couldn’t look at me. I walked him to the door and before he left he stopped, turned around and placed a soft kiss on my lips.
“Good bye, Y/N.” The way he said good bye sent a ripple of pain through my body. I knew this was it. The last time I’d see him, and it hurt. It hurt so damn much.
“Good bye, Jensen, and I’m sorry.” My voice barely whispers. His breath hitched and he stepped out the door.
I locked the door and crawled back into bed crying. Eventually I cried myself to sleep.
*Jensen’s POV*
“I love you”, her sweet voice echoed in my head. My body tensed and I couldn’t respond. I wanted to say it too, damn did I want to, but I’m terrified. After the last woman I gave my heart to, how can I be sure it won’t end the same way.
I left like a coward. No doubt making her feel worse. I have no idea how to fix this. I am falling for her. I was falling for her even before tonight.
I just need to clear my head.
Driving home debating turning the car around or heading home. God I’m so torn.
I sent Steve a text.
Jensen: Hey man, you awake?
Steve: Kinda busy with Sarah at the moment, you okay?
Jensen: Not really, but I’ll figure it out. I think I fucked up.
Steve: Is everyone okay?
Jensen: I don’t know. I just left Y/N’s house and I screwed up.
Steve: Give me 5 minutes.
Jensen pulled in his driveway and sat there. Unable to move, so he waited for Steve’s call.
The phone ringing pulled Jensen’s attention back to reality. “Hey man. I really fucked up.” “What happened?”
“We had sex, and man was it incredible. After we were in each other’s arms she said “I love you” and I tensed up. When she got up to go to the bathroom, I got up and got dressed. I left.”
Steve ran his fingers through his hair. “Jensen, why?” “Honestly, I’m scared. I’m falling for her too, and I love Lily like she’s my own. I just don’t want to be hurt again.”
“Jensen, I get it man. Nobody wants to be hurt, but I’ve seen you guys together. She’s in love with you, hell Sarah even said Y/N was. She’s known her for years, so I’d believe her. Believe me, Y/N isn’t going to jump into any relationship without thinking it through, especially because of Lily. Man you need to make this right, and now.”
“Thanks man. I appreciate it. Tell Sarah hi.” Jensen put his car in drive and headed back to my place.
I laid in the bed, tears finally stopping and I stared at the ceiling. The events of the night playing in my head like a silent movie. The way his hands and lips felt to the crushing pain of him walking out the door. I couldn’t sleep.
I heard a knock on the front door. I grabbed my robe and tiptoed through the room. Looking out the peephole I saw Jensen. His face twisted with pain and regret.
I took a deep breath and opened the door. His eyes met mine and he walked in pulled me tight and crashed his lips to mine. When we pulled away, his lips ghosted mine as he whispered, “I’m so sorry. I’m a coward. I shouldn’t have walked away.” He kissed me again, this time with more emotion. I felt his regret pouring from his lips.
When we pulled away I guided him to the couch. “Jensen, what happened? I mean, I know what I said, and I’m so sorry. It just slipped out.” Jensen shook his head, “Don’t be sorry baby. Honestly I was scared. I feel it too, and it scares the hell out of me. The last woman I gave my heart to broke it and used me.”
“Jensen, I get it. The last man I gave my heart to knocked me up and left me. I’m scared too, but I promise I would never intentionally hurt you.”
“I know, Y/N. You and Lily mean so much to me. It scared me because of how quickly it happened, then tonight. Everything clicked into place. You said I love you and panic filled my body. I shouldn't have walked out like I did. I’m so sorry, baby.”
I cupped his face in my hands, “Jensen, it’s okay to be scared. We can navigate all of this together. You don’t have to say it until you’re ready, but please don’t leave every time I say it.”
Jensen swallowed and nodded, “I won’t, I promise.” I stood and took his hand, “Come on, let’s go back to bed.” He nodded, shrugged off his jacket and the two of us crawled back into the bed.
My head rested on his chest as he drew delicate patterns on my back and arm.
He kissed the top of my head, and we both drifted off to sleep laying in each other’s arms.
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#hes gorgeous#so damn sexy#jensen ackles#jackles#jensen ackles x plus size reader#jensen ackles x reader#jensen ackles smut
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w.c. 3.4k💀so much words for this crap / sunday x truckdriver!gnreader (dafuqq is this dynamic), small stories, 99% of the penacony cast are impressed by you(they should be), robin is a cutie pie, sunday is a closeted robin fan, you and sunday squabble daily, sunday your wonweek is showing💗, wrote this in the tumblr drafts vro🔥part crack a/n: farted this out bc i got inspired by this otome isekai manhwa i was reading [truck knight taekbae] + aesthetics inspired by [who made me a princess]
NOTE: ONG WFTF I ACCIDEBTALLY POSTED TGIS GUYS ITS NOT FINISHED WTTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF WAIT ILL EDIT THIS REAL QUICKKKK
darkness monopolised your vision ever since you got here; day time never graced you. the insulated walls do their job well—only the vibrations, the frayed edges of sound, can be heard.
chains grip your wrists, the metal twisting into your skin, wringing it like cloth. ouch. what now? maybe if you fart consecutively, and hard enough, you can blow your way out?
"brother... why…?" vibrations again.
"don’t… monitor… danger."
the iron door creaks. light shines a single ray though the gap, and like the sun, the radiance blinds you. you squint your eyes, tracing the outline of two silhouettes.
the taller one approaches, each stride covering an equal, set amount of distance without a lost beat. "i have one question," their tone dashes against the whetstone, pointing a sharpened blade at you. "who are you?"
their eyes did not welcome any light, no reflection of you in them, as if you were only a whisper of the air. you feel the cracks in your throat. "me? i’m just a truck driver."
you are having tea with sunday.
after the less-than-ideal introductions, the picture cleared: you, a truck driver, are isekai’d into penacony via truck inception(?).
"i apologise for my manners," sunday sips his cup. "when you... suspisciously appeared in my bathroom, unresponding, there was no room to be courteous."
"sorry about that," you play with the rim of your cup awkwardly. "i'm not sure what happened either." the honest truth.
sunday shakes his head. he's majestic. "so, you said that you were…" he taps his chin.
"a truck driver."
"a criminal?"
"... truck driver."
“an assassin?”
"..." you almost turned into one.
little did you know, your lone walk was accompanied by a slithering shadow. except... it was no shadow. it was a dazzling spotlight that had fans and reporters following her repslendent glow, as expected of penacony's halovian songstress: robin.
"you mentioned you were a truck driver," finally, someone knows what a truck driver is. "will you allow me to see it?"
yes, your truck teleported into the dreamscape too. how could you live without them? they sit by a pavement on penacony's streets, hoarding the stares of confused citizens.
you watch an infinite cosmos flare in robin's incandescent eyes. your truck is just that impressive. "wow...! it's so beautiful!"
"what a curious machine," a blue and blonde-haired pair are analysing. "a vehicle that inefficiently operates on wheels? rather old-fashioned."
"what in the ever-lovin' fudge? my great-great-great-great-great gramps had one of those!"
"a sight of blissful beauty blooms before my eyes. amazing!"
“where am i?”
“acheron, it hasnt even been a minute yet and you’re confused.”
people's eager stomping tremble the earth and sky. it's just that impressive. in the distance, an extra pair of wary eyes observe you.
"i admit, i am still suspiscious of you," sunday crosses one leg over the other. "robin sang nothing but praises. however, i'm afraid i'll need you under my surveillance to prove your trustworthiness."
urk. possessive much? "why are there knives, swords, and rocket launchers on the table?" sunday cocks an eyebrow at you, expecting you to make a move. "... i'm really not an assassin, sunday." but you do know his entire life story, so you're actually his stalker.
suddenly. the room blurs. an annoying static repeats, plucking the sensory wires from your circuit. is he... is he using his thingamajig powers?
"you may not be one... for now." he looks out a large window. you follow his gaze. wait a minute. what are they doing to-
“MY TRUUUUCK!!!” your passion transcends boundaries, past the lower-case and forcing the caps lock. lunging, you rush outside the mansion. "HEy!"
"aaaaa!! run!"
"eeek!"
"nyaa~!" who the hell was that?
"what the..." you are stunned. how dare they vandalise your truck! "was this your order?" you turn to sunday, infuriated.
"what will you do now?" a corner of his lips lifts, provoking.
you clench your fist. no one messes with you, the best truck driver, and only truck driver, in penacony.
hypothetically, if you got hit by a truck and ended up here, could you, a truck driver, hit a penaconian and isekai them over to your world?
"hey, robin?"
"hm?" her smile is innocent, gazing at you with a prospering kindness deserving of its own halo.
you smack your head. a dozen times over. then a few more.
"hey, aventurine?"
"hi hi~"
you shake your head. wouldn't his luck interfere? if anything, you'd be the one to get run over again.
"hey, acheron?"
"who are you?"
doesn't even know who you are despite telling her a minute ago. if she ended up in your world, she'd be asking the same question anyway: "where am i?"
you pick your nose. she'd slice you in half. period.
"hey, rappa."
"dazzling ninja rappa at your service!"
"as am i, the dimension-trespassing truck driving ninja!"
unfortunately, ninja roleplay with rappa is too fun. every friday, you play dnd together and you can't miss it this week.
there's only one person left.
"hey sun-"
"don't."
you stare blankly. "i didn't say anything?"
sunday glares back. "if you are going to speak to me, do it in front of me, and not while starting the engine of your truck."
"tch... damn."
"could i use your truck as a stage prop for my next concert?"
"oh, what if it suddenly rains?"
"what if i accidentally trip?"
you notice a gap in robin's behaviour. "how come you're so nervous today?"
robin looks at you, mouth on the verge of speaking. she looks down at her shoes. "hmm..." she tilts her head, lips mumbling. she hesitates, unready to spill her heart.
there's one thing you do best. you suggest, "why don't we go for a ride in my truck?"
robin's hunched back quickly reshapens itself. it's been some time since you've had a passenger, but with the way robin swiftly adjusts herself in the seats, excited, you don't worry about the mess in the truck. you start the vehicle, ready to stroll penacony's streets.
you hand her a piece of unexpired candy from a compartment, and she accepts the gesture. it doesn't take long before robin settles herself afterwards. she sighs. "... it's my brother, he'll be attending a show for the first time. i'm a bit nervous."
"why would he not be supportive?" you question.
robin shakes her head. "it may be because my brother is a perfectionist. i can't help but believe that he'll be expecting a flawless performance."
halovian songstress robin, a nation-wide icon, for her, expectations continually rise without rest. but for now, she sits next to you as robin herself, without the embellishments and performing. a breath of fresh air.
words of reassurance may be able to tend her heart. "make as many mistakes as you want," you comfort, "you are robin yourself before you are a singer, a civilian, and a sister."
the candy in her palm is scrunched. her heart, opens. robin herself, smiles. not because she is expected to, not because she is told to, but because she wants to. "thank you."
on the eighth day, grant... sunday getting down on one knee for you. wasn't this a bit fast?
your mouth opens. "are you proposing right now?"
"what are you on about?" sunday looks up at you, eyebrows scrunched. in his hands, a riiiiiiiiiiing- no, he's just cleaning his shoes with a cloth. better luck next time.
robin suggested to use your truck like a cabbie. that way, you can still keep your pride as a truck driver, and provide ears for wary hearts:
a student struggling with academics.
someone who doesn't know which direction to take.
the ramblings of a doctor whose words are spoken with precision, slicing his words into the victim's flesh. but behind the gloves are trembling hands that only wishes to sew tight the rotting wounds of a poor gambler, if only he would let him.
a galaxy ranger who witnessed the brevity of lives in the isolated expanse of the universe, walked along the shore of nihility. she departs with you her true name so that when she returns, your heart can accompany her solitude once more.
a young girl who cannot tell if the blood on her hands are someone else's, or her own. every allude to life reminded her of a deathly fate. however, as your passenger, she is reminded that she can forge a life of her own, undecided by destiny. penance and redemption, then, in the end, she hopes to regain her humanity.
you've listened to them all. unlocked each of their hearts, always gave back the key if they ever wanted to return again. turns out, the people of penacony are not much different from those in your world.
robin would pass out if she saw this.
from what you remember, there were 88 doors in the oak family's residence (you're a dedicated fan). you've explored each one, door 86, 87, 88... 89?
a secluded door that can only be seen with eagle eyes. the mystery kindles sparks in your chest, flaming curious fires. you slowly open the door. 86, 87, 88, 89... robins? (one for every door?) they all stare at you within their enclosures, as either posters, figurines, or books cover. in the middle sat a familiar head of grey hair, lowered, back turned towards you.
"sunday?"
the head moves up. gradually, it creaks. never in your life, did you expect to see a robin-crazed hidden room, nor a red-faced sunday. oh robin, the brother you were so worried about, is actually your no.1 fan. sunday's halovian wings flap furiously, doing nothing to cool his face down. his expression seems annoyed to have been caught in the act. "... what?"
"is this your robin shrine?" this is it. this will be your revenge, and the beginning tastes sweet. "so, you're the real criminal out of the two of us."
one can imagine the fumes blowing out of his ears. his eyes glisten, on the verge of tears. oops, he's really embarrassed.
you turn your face away, allowing sunday as much privacy as possible within his very private room. or rather, you are avoiding his eyes to suppress laughter. "you're coming to robin's concert, right?"
"you coming?" you gesture towards your majestic truck. it's a beautiful night for a truck ride.
sunday, your victim, is reluctant, of course. he probably still believes that you are an assassin who will run him over. "i won't die, will i?"
you huff. "i'm just a truck driver. what's the worse i could do? kidnap you?" sunday stares at you, frightened. it does not take much for him to believe in your potential for evil. "it's a joke... i'm not a criminal. or an assassin."
"just for a few minutes," he resigns. score. you open the door for sunday, who eventually sits down. you start the engine.
"welcome." sunday is in your truck. what an achievement. heh. you place your foot on the pedal.
it is silent apart from the engine's buzzing. you hand sunday an unexpired bag of chips from the compartment. he receives it, inspecting the packaging. his eyes trail to the window, studying how the sunset paints penacony with autumn's palette, but beyond it, he is watching the dots of people. you watch the melancholic sunday.
"what's on your mind?" you ask.
"nothing significant."
"well, the whole point of my trucking service is to listen to passengers." you turn the wheel. honestly, you don't know where you're going, and neither does sunday. the moon guides you tonight, two lost souls. "say anything."
sunday fiddles with the bag of chips. "...maintaining the oak family status, work, the people," he finally speaks, "it balances on my shoulders."
you hum, signalling him to continue.
"wouldn't a utopia free from suffering solve everything?"
quite a hard-hitting question for a truck driver, sunday. you nod. "of course. the only problem is that it is not real - everyone is forced into the current reality. it is harsh and cruel..." you blink. "but we are not powerless to it."
"how do you suggest we solve it?"
it is quiet for a moment before your mind wanders to every passenger you've had. they all had one thing in common. "i guess, a lot of people want a shoulder to lean on, an ear to open for them, and a voice to validate their feelings. we can do that."
all those passengers seemed to shine brighter at the end of the ride, ready to chase a dream. you may not be saving the world - you are no hero, just a truck driver - but you help tend the invisible wounds of people: the blood that drips from sharp words, the bruises that sting from deprecation, the headaches.
isn't it fine to take it slow? navigate the dark, little-by-little, and by the end, there will be an even brighter light.
"... i see." sunday watches your hands manoeuvre the truck's mechanics. the flick in your eyes that turn to him, to which he shies away from. then, he rests his eyes. as the truck drives, a silence hangs, one of quiet understanding. bit-by-bit, you gaze into sunday's heart.
it's been some time since you got run over.
adjusting to penacony was difficult at first. you had to adapt to life at the family's mansion, and the daily customs. however, the burden was eased slightly, all partly thanks to a special helper.
every morning, a cup of coffee or freshly-squeezed juice presents itself in the kitchen. every afternoon, your favourite bookshop always happens to have the book you wanted, already reserved for you. every night, your bedroom door slowly opens, quietly. your blanket, moves up to cover your torso. the mess in your room, rearranged and picked up. the back of a hand, feathers over your cheek. and nothing more happens. your little helper is easily satisfied at the sight of a peaceful you.
"does robin know about this room?" you are flipping through an ancient truck magazine.
sunday is wiping the display cabinets. his wings are flapping again, turning to you. "you didn't mention it to her, did you?"
"no, but she's going on tour soon after," you play with the corner of a page. "why don't you send her your encouragement?”
"what do you suggest?" he asks.
you look at the ceiling. it's full of robin's pictures. "a heartfelt letter? personally, i would buy her a truck but i don't think she needs that."
a small laugh escapes sunday's lips. you did not expect that. "that would be nice." he moves over to a desk, and from a drawer he pulls out a page adorned with blue flowers, and a pen.
you walk over to his desk. "you're into stationary?"
"i don't see why not," sunday says, "my work requires mostly writing, after all."
he begins from the top: 'dear sister,'. from there, sunday is a bit clumsy and awkward, asks her how the weather is and if she had breakfast. "... i've never done this before," is what he said. but gradually, the pen picks up, and the words flow. now, there was too much left unspoken when sunday reaches the final line, and had to cross out the sentence he was writing. a total of four pages, both sides filled, with more words waiting to be said - those would be left for when the siblings reunite.
"maybe we can have the people of penacony sign it too." you smile, imagining robin's elation when she reads it.
sunday nods. he scratches his signature and hands the paper to you. "here."
you take the pen, hesitant. "what's this for?"
sunday raises an eyebrow. "you're a citizen of penacony, are you not?"
... oh. were you? your throat dries. when did you become a part of penacony? weren't you... just a truck driver?
sunday watches you contemplate. a silence drawls. suddenly, he wraps his hand around yours, holding the pen still. "why are you hesitating?" nib meets page. ribbon by ribbon, the ink dances. "you belong here, don't you?"
your chest grows warm. you weren't expecting that either. full of surprises, aren't we? the same person that chained your hands and observed you, coldly answered to you, is offering his warmth. his hand is resolute, unwilling to let go. it reassure your doubts. you smile.
the pen lifts:
'from, your loving brother and, your dear friend.'
surprisingly, sunday has gotten comfortable with your presence in his forbidden robin cove. as you have with his in your magnificent truck.
yet, as much as you've driven closer, the gap is bottomless. sunday doesn't appreciate you looking at him, yet, he's allowed to drill holes in you when you're not aware?
you've asked robin, but she answered cryptically with a smile. "he used to watch over me as well, overprotective as always, but i'm sure that's his way of expressing himself when words fail him."
you reccount the passing moments.
a person more of action, lesser of words. for his people, he worked endlessly without their validation. for robin, he hid in the shadows of his much brighter devotion and support. for you, he let you slowly seep into his life, and you absorbed him into yours. a truck driver and an overqualified partner-in-crime.
quiet devotion is a tender song. without the beating of his loud commands, penacony would be left unprotected. without the instrumental scratching of his pen, there would be no light on the streets. without the percussive clicking of his shoes, the citizens would not be able to dance and celebrate.
this was sunday's song; no one else heard it, but it hums beneath the surface, invisible. those who press their ears against it can sense its vibrations. a silence that speaks louder than words or lyrics. and now, you can't mistake it, your heart beats to the silent song.
it is the night of robin's last stage in penacony. you and sunday stand on a balcony, watching over her. the final song sways along the night-caressed breeze, setting free the wings of hopeful listeners and dreamchasers.
though for a certain someone, he was using more of his eyes than ears. when you meet his golden pair, they turn awway as usual.
"what's with you?" you lean against the railing.
his hands hide behind his back. "nothing significant."
"hey, i thought we were past that already. i told you i'm a truck driver who listen to their passengers."
silence hangs. a few more spoken words, "and? have you told your story?"
"me?"
his eyes find yours... but they don't turn away anymore. behind his role as penacony's figure and as a brother, it is sunday who is talking to you. in his gaze, it doesn't judge, impartial, waiting to listen, asking if it is okay for you to lend him your key. the words catch in your throat. "i'm... just a truck driver..." you close your eyes. "a truck driver who got lost here."
sunday shakes his head. "i’m not asking about one miniscule part of your life. behind that is you who experienced a reality that built the person in front of me," his voice is shaky. an unsteady hand opens and closes, hopes to reach out for yours, but is uncertain. "i'm... asking for permission to learn all of you."
"..." robin's song is about to come to an end.
you look at the mirror. a mirror that always reflected only you, now fits one more person in the frame. that is your answer.
the you who is listening, reading, watching, all your past versions converge into this quiet meeting. usually, the mirror rejected, criticised, and distorted. but today, it finally listens. the mirror holds your reflection to be true. before you got to penacony, before you stood in the middle of a road, before you became a truck driver, you were...
"speak to me. i'm here to listen as you have for others." and keep that key to his heart, for it remains open unconditionally, always a place for you in there.
two losts souls, under the moon, found a home in each other.
a person closes the novel they were reading. they pick up their phone and start typing:
“-4.2/5 rating, absolute horror. where was robin at the end? i was waiting for her! and what’s with all the mirrors and life lessons? preeeeetty criiiinge. i'm reading a fantasy novel, not a lecture. why is mc even a truck driver anyways? also, not enough hand holding, and definitely not enough kissing. zero points!” this random nobody criticises, slamming fingers on the screen. they pause. “i wonder when the next volume will be released…”
a/n: great use of my holiday tbh, get everything out b4 i'm busy again💖i hate drawing hoyo charas they're so detailed, applause to all the hoyo artists u guys r goated fr i thought itd be cute to turn this into a series. i have some deleted ideas since i only wanted this to be a short piece (i got carried away smh). but tbh this fic ended off nicely, i dont think it needs continuing. idk. i like pistachio ice cream thanks for reading!!😲
#hold me back b4 i do a sunday arranged marriage isekai#with a train conductor reader#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail#hsr#hsr sunday#sunday x reader
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Gosh I wish you made such big analize about Xavier and Sylus, sometimes I feel so dumb that I can't read so good behind the lines. 😭😭😭
HEY NO CMON NOW NO NEED TO DISCREDIT YOURSELF LIKE THAT!!!! First of all, this is an ongoing game and story, think of it like an incomplete ao3 fic you have theories for. There are HUUGE gaps in there that will be filled later and until then, they are left to the interpretation of the player. It's only natural, there's SO MUCH stuff and lore out there to be consumed, which are often non-linear that it makes things confusing on purpose. It's all about feeding us crumbs about what's coming, of course we get lost!!
Secondly, I made the rafayel analysis because it confused the lights out of me with the constant nagging feeling that I was missing something and that's why I didn't understand most things and wanted to get my thoughts straight. Like the ebb day theories floating out there as to why he was Like That, why he said the things he did out of nowhere and randomly like "what if i take from you will you leave me?" after the topic was JUST about sceneries and the love and art burns me talk after YET AGAIN another art talk about inspiration in pain. I had whiplash over whiplash and felt the need to dive deep into intertidal zone.
It's not like that with Sylus and Xavier (and Zayne's) cards. At least for me. All of them are fairly self-contained compared to his, I feel like. And I'm sure other people have discussed this already, much better than I can as well -- especially Sylus, but I'll put my two cents in for a general review of both their memorias!
Xavier is experiencing negative emotions such as jealousy FOR THE FIRST TIME with MC. He doesn't know how to process these feelings which are allowed to be nurtured in a safe environment when that wasn't the case before in his life. They manifest in temper bursts that stem from a life of being forced to be emotionally blank. He wasn't allowed to be a child or freedom for himself and his thoughts and feelings and wants, so he starts behaving in a childish way -- it's something he's surprised about as well. This happens when you feel safe with a person that those repressed parts begin to open up and you start being yourself more with them. It's sad when you think about it, as cute as it is coming from Xavier. MC is so understanding of him and finding him being "expressive" more as a really positive thing. She's an amazing partner -- because let's face it, if this behavior came from a man in real life, it would be so annoying. Xavier isn't like those other men though, his jealousy doesn't come from a need to control or possess, a place of distrust, projection or disregard of personal boundaries. It's cute because it's followed by healthy communication to allow Xavier to process and grow and open up more, it doesn't threaten the relationship. This is just my interpretation, aside from the context of their previous lives together (the desire to monopolize now that he finally is with her) and this being Xavier's possibly last year on earth that gives a "i've got so little time left and i don't want to waste it" stuff.
And Sylus is. Well. There's a lot in there. The theme here is "their first time", and it's not limited to sleeping together, in my opinon. Theirs is a burgeoning relationship compared to the other "established" relationships. They're new to each other. We even see domesticity from them in MC's house for the first time, though it is a result of Sylus's Onychinus life making an introduction in their relationship as something that has to be legitimately talked about eventually. MC wants to come along with him and know more but Sylus hides a lot from her to keep her safe and separate from him, and yes it's his business and MC doesn't push (the mutual respect is insane here), but it's affecting their time together. Not that MC sees this as a problem because she's always ready to throw down (AND does lock in and gets one step ahead of him).
I read this as MC's first time finally letting him in and her desires/feelings for him that she asked him to stay and kept making the moves when it had all been him before. Her feelings are growing. And you can see how much it pleases him and makes him happy, he was waiting for this -- for MC to voluntarily want him and be honest with him. That's all Sylus wants. He can see into what she wants, and sure yeah he knows, but her outwardly voicing them to him is a different story altogether. It shows she trusts him, and that's important to Sylus.
She was mostly closed off and withdrawn from him emotionally because they have this dynamic that started off hostile that turned into teasing and provoking where she sees being vulnerable with him as a weakness that would be embarrassing. It's a budding relationship, remember? No couple is all in & open with each other right from the beginning, it comes later. And Sylus is a dominant man (not domineering, that's a different word) and I think MC doesn't like being weak next to someone like him, and she perceives a power imbalance there unconsciously even though Sylus wants her to be open so bad and rely on him more and give her everything she wants and needs.
So it's HUUUUUGE that they showed Sylus intertwine their hands together when he had to FORCE IT before. MC is finally receiving him with open arms and you can see he's delighted. It's so romantic first of all, but mans is hungry, BUT HE'S ALSO SO TENDER AND LOVING !!! GOOD FOR YOU SYLUS GET IT. I love this for him and that he felt safe enough to sleep even though he's nocturnal. Or she sucked the soul right out of his dick and knocked him out cold 😭 the sex was so astronomically soul ascending i guess LMFAO
Again, I'm sorry if I got anything wrong. These are just my thoughts, and they are surface level!
#love and deepspace#lads#sylus#lads sylus#sylus qin#xavier shen#lads xavier#l&ds#l&ds sylus#l&ds xavier#sylus x mc#xavier x mc#fandom: lads
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2024 fandom review
thank you for the tag @nerdyfangirl76 and @almostlake 💜
warning: this got really long
fics written
in 2024, i posted 3 finished fics and one currently on-going WIP. in total that was 122,542 words and i keep looking at that number in complete disbelief.
i started the year by saying, multiple times, i'm not going to write anything because it's been nearly a decade since i wrote for fun. then i had an idea and was all "well, maybe if i wrote this one short thing, posted it and then dipped never to be seen again". insert my friend laughing at me at regular intervals because we all know that's not what happened.
always losing to win is very dear to me, for several reasons, and it'll never stop blowing my mind how many people have read it and been on that journey with me.
fics read
my AO3 history is about 300 fics, but i did not sort out my logins until months into the year, so the actual number is probably somewhere closer to 350.
i tried to pick a few favourite fics i read and limiting myself to just these is hard. i regret to say none of these have received the praise, comments and love from me that they deserve, because it took me months to get over my comment shyness. but i hope this makes up for it a bit. (new year's resolution: more comments for everyone.) in alphabetical order by title:
almost is never enough by @in-amor-veritas
there's a scene in this with kent's 747 that i have the strongest, plot-wise most insignificant headcanon about and i think about it every time i hear the song. which is often. and then i end up thinking about the whole story.
another dose by stargazers
it's such a beautiful version of wilmon, because it's so them. and it's hot.
chasing our sunlight by fitz_y
if there ever was a fic that lives rent free in my head, it's this. the way it deals with so many heavy topics has made me cry, but it's such an incredibly crafted story i come back to it often.
forever i'm yours by @goldenwilmon
the way the fall in love in this one? hands down one of my favourites ever. whenever i need some fluff and happiness in my life, this is the one i go for.
little light by @unfortunate17
possibly one of the first, if not the first, wilmon fic i read in 2024. it broke something in me, but also healed something in me.
reckless abandon by @zee-has-commitment-issues
i absolutely love the concept and the way all the characters are so well-rounded. one of the fics i could not stop reading and can't wait to read again.
so loaded, eye low by @enjoythesilentworld
the chemistry, the angst. the sweet, delicious angst. and hot as hell.
where be left off by @gulliblelemon
the best way for me to fight some physical pain? some emotional pain. and this one has it, in the best, most beautiful way. very few fics have i devoured like i did this one.
the wolf comes home by @phneltwrites
after months, i still keep thinking about a particular line in this one. the trauma aftermath, the way they deal with it. also my favourite established relationship wilmon.
looking forward to in 2025
i can't wait to read and see all the amazing fics and gifs and edits and everything this fandom comes up with. i already know there'll be so many wonderful things i'll enjoy.
as for my own writing, i'm trying to get a good chunk of hope and legacy written before the insanity that'll be my life from late january to the end of february. (no context chapter 4 spoiler: simon steals a flag.)
there is also in from the cold, the espionage AU i have about 10K written for - and that's barely the beginning. i don't know if it'll ever see the light of day, but i do love the concept and all the research i've done for it.
i have been thinking about space wilmon lately, and while i said i'm not going to go down that road myself, i did remember a few lines from record of a spaceborn few that may have sparked an idea. it might become something one day, or it might never be more than the few disjointed lines and ideas i have typed in my notes.
there's also a file with a list of songs that i might want to build stories around. in general i have a lot of ideas, but very few of them might become anything. i'd like to put it down as "english is not my first language so writing is slow" thing, and while it is that too, it's mostly me being a perfectionist and not able to let go. (which is why i should probably have a beta telling me 'this is fine, go post it'. if anyone feels up for doing that...)
the biggest, warmest thank you to everyone who's read anything i've written, left kudos or comments, sent messages, in any way engaged. it has made my year, and this fandom experience so special 💜
not tagging anyone, but if any of the authors i mentioned haven't done this yet and would like to, i'd love to read your reviews.
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Hey I probably totally could’ve just left this as a comment on ao3 but I’ve had the browser closed for about a few hours at the point after reading the newest update (and I’m kinda afraid to reopen it back to the fic,) with 30 minutes immediately proceeding reading it spent laying exactly where I had been up into the ceiling and simply reflecting. It hasn’t left my mind since.
Oh. My. God.
Whenever this fic updates, for the last like 5 chapters I somehow unknowingly have this sudden compulsion to go and see if it had updated recently, and just happen to have this thought occur on the exact day or day after you update again. Never in my life have a read a fic so so so so good that I have a sneaking suspicion that the universe itself is somehow leading me back to read it.
Ever since I was lucky enough to happen to find a rec of it somewhere updated around the 7th chapter (and proceeded to spend the entire day, from around 10am to 8pm reading the entire posted story, only breaking for a single microwaved meal and completely forgetting to ever bake my bread dough I had prepared before knowing my life would be altered) I have genuinely held more thought for this fic than anything else I’ve ever read.
I have laughed aloud. I have exclaimed and yelled at them through the goddamn screen. I have genuinely sobbed more times than I’d like to ever admit (a bit more for these for the last few, and for this most recent update…… 😬😬😬 let’s just say it was a rough time in a wonderful brilliant way.) Never before has a fic affected me so so so so so so so so so much.
Speaking of the fic itself, mentioned appallingly late in my message of absolute adoration for your writing, I think it is the most well written piece of media that I have ever read. Yes, that genuinely includes the original Good Omens book, which ranks at a close second. Every single character you write is absolutely three dimensional and genuinely sososososos interesting, like an entire world of their own. One of my favorite things is your imagined progression of characters like Adam from when we see them in the show to this current timeline. Older Adam’s personality just seems so…. right?)??????? And of course, our main duo and their evolution throughout the course of the story. The in-depth progression of their characters, relationship, and understanding (both of themselves, each other, and the readers understanding of each of them) is absolutely stunning.
Actually, that might be an understatement. I could use a near infinite amount of words: jaw-dropping, beautiful, stellar- but none of them would be able to truly express how absolutely wordless and indescribable (perhaps the closest one could say would be ineffable?) the absolute wonderfulnessnof your ability in that regard is. That, combined with your absolutely intricately woven plot constantly leaves me both simultaneously shattered and forfilled and joyous and devastated at every twist and turn.
That combined with your word choice and structural ability? You not only know how to weave marvelous concepts and ideas but write and execute them absolutely flawlessly.I remember after the last update with Things Kinda Beginnjng To Fall Apart in chapter 19 where as times gets more choppy and everything gets more distorted, the small details leading up to the bigger ones worked perfectly to create slight confusion yet not outright “wait this is wrong” before things seemed to click, just eerily getting more and more off. Do you know how smooth that transition has to be for me to not outright stop to question when Aziraphale says to Crowley “you should get a car” and Crowley’s like “Nuh uh, death traps” and just feel extremely uneasy and yet have absolutely no waver in continuing to lead??? And all ending up to Dogs grave and where everything super MEGA wrong and so much time is gone and kwcwlcwivekckdck!???????! I know I’m just reciting your OWN plot back to you but point is THE WIRITJNG WAS GENUINELY SOSOSOSO AMAZING
What really made me really finally write this after the hours spent reflecting on this fic was the most recent update. I have genuinely been unable to stop thinking about it since the last update, and I just. My heart is broken and yet I’m the lightest I’ve ever been with the ending, even if I’m still recovering from the rest. My heart genuinely broke slowly more and more as I realized Aziraphale was Highkey RIGHT and reflecting more and more while reading about how even though Crowley doing everything to save him in the end it’s just kinda spending the little ttime they have apart and???))) I totally understand him and his desperation but at the same time I wanted to SHAKE him just like I imagine Aziraphale kinda wanted to at times to open up his eyes from the tunnel vision!!!!
The gloves??????????? And the market????? And the COTTAGE?!)))!?????? I know I’m just causing things that have happened but every single thing that happens in this chapter is just so major and so so so sososos evocative and I can literally visualize literally everything in my head which is so hard to do sometimes with my autism. And I can see it all sososossososo clearly which is genuinely something I can never do.
I cannot describe to you the tenseness and despair and bitter sweetness (however one would experience/react to bittersweetness? Not sure of the word) that I felt as the time slowly ticked down in the very final stretch, when they finally were able to just spend the time they had left together OTGHETER (not to mention Aziraphale KNOWING that he will come back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) that I felt leading up to the midnight bell. I genuinely had my phone in one hand and the collar of my shirt bunched up in the other to continue to wipe away the constant watery tears that threatened and blurred my eyes to prevent me from reading (which I refused to let deter me even for a SECOND) as they said their goodbyes before MURIEL COMES IN WITH THE (metaphorical) STEEL CHAIR!!!!!!!!!!
And the sudden shift wasn’t jarring in any bad way and I literally started pumping my fist in the air in an empty room and cheering YEAHHH LETS GOGOGOOOOOO LET S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO when Muriel came in for the win. And the shift to hope? To joy? To the familiar lightheartedness and determination that they’d lacked in the face of something so grave for so long???????? You have set things up for the absolute most rewarding turn and fight back to the finish that I’ve ever read. After chapters of setting up the stakes, of making everything (in the best way) so incredibly hopeless and dark and dreary and unbeatable and intimate and lovely, the catharsis of the relief of FINALLY having their fate in their hands again and that fighting chance (quite literally now) has been one of the most amazing feelings ever.
I am being literally so genuine when I say I don’t even think I felt this strongly watching the final fifteen in the actual for the first time. I’m so so so so excited and ready for the next update and to be able to finally cheer for them again as a kickass team, a group, a group of the two of them (+Muriel my beloved) to save the goddamn universe AGAIN!!!!!! I’m so so so excited for some straight up action (as much as I’ve absolutely enjoyed getting my heart ripped out and stomped on for the last few chapters, and the decisive business and bold decisions before those) and genuinely can’t wait to see what these upcoming final two chapters bring 🫶🫶🫶 thank you sososossooso much for writing that absolutely wonderful piece that will haunt me for years to come and be solidified as one of the best works I’ve read not just in fanfiction, but ever.
oh my god. sorry i've been sitting on this several days, i actually read it pretty much immediately and have been routinely rereading it over and over this entire week. from the bottom of my heart, thank you SO much for your kind words and for your enjoyment of hdwtotl. you taking the time out of your day to write this just to let me know you're enjoying the story is unreal, i cannot express enough how much i appreciate you and probably the nicest words i've ever heard from anyone regarding my writing. the fact that this feels like a faithful continuation of the canon is nothing less than an honor. i really feel like all the sleepless nights and weekends full of writing and rewrite after rewrite have all been made worth it :'-)
normally i would answer this privately, but i'm a bit selfish and want this to forever be available to read on my blog whenever i want to <3 never hesitate to shoot me a message
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Booster's Queer af
Something I wrote on Reddit on a thread asking 'what's your DC hot take??', because if you're gonna kick a hornet's nest, kick it with your best steel-toed boots and then smile:
Booster's queer. That man hasn't come across as straight-- ever. Like even when I started reading DC in 2003, he came across as queer to me, pretty much from his inception. Seriously. He comes across like someone closeted and decidedly not-straight who just stays in the closet initially because it was a very bad time to be anything other than heterosexual when he landed in the past and later because it's habit and expected of him. I don't think he's gay, I think he probably leans pretty pansexual or maybe even demisexual, but any which way, you'll never convince me he's not at least a little bit queer. He's had one in-universe romance that hasn't been retconned (Firehawk) in his entire time existing and one that was a joke and maybe not even real canon (Gladys). After almost four decades. His thing with Firehawk lasted, I think, like less than a year, too. I'm pretty sure you can count his on-panel kisses on one hand, but not more than two. He's never had a 'morning after' scene. The one seriously emotionally intimate relationship he has is with another guy. When he does flirt or attempt to, it comes off as being awkward and a bit desperate and a bit like a man who is kinda using it as cover. And like-- that really makes way more sense for him than anything otherwise. I'd sincerely hope by the 25th century that we'd stop giving a damn who loves or wants whomever else based on gender presentation. It also makes for a pretty compelling tale, a guy getting dropped into the middle of the AIDS epidemic learning a very quick and ugly lesson about what happens to queer folk in this time period. I dunno how hot a take this is, though, because at least some people up top agree (he's canonically hooked up with Ted in Teen Titans Go! and like-- any time Tom Taylor writes them, he all but says it aloud), but if TPTB were brave, they'd finally confirm it mainline. Like you don't even have to ship him with Ted (though that's my preference), just confirm he's queer. Here's my essay. What's my grade? LOL!
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Since it's relevant, tho, here's a few pieces I wrote from a long email back and forth (since us old people still do that) with another very long-time fan of his a couple weeks ago:
But anyway, to me, he acts about like how a kid who got dropped into the 80s during the height of the AIDS panic and rampant homophobia and the wholesale death of gay men might, especially if he were queer himself. I'd probably try to straight-wash myself, too, in his boots. (I remember that time period, if distantly. I didn't realize I was queer myself until I was well into my 20s, despite falling in very desperate and intense love with another girl when I was 12. I do remember being in high school when a boy was murdered for being queer by being tortured and left tied to a fence to die, though. It was that kind of world back then for people like us. In some places, it still is.) Still, where Booster fails at any hetero romance (oh god does he), he's so devoted to Ted that a big part of his second solo was dedicated to him either trying to save the man or actively mourning him. It's heartbreaking and amazing and really actually quite good stuff, from a literary POV. Whether DC meant it or not, somehow they managed to write one of the greatest love stories I've ever seen in a comic across most of twenty years, no kidding, and I've read a lot across a lot of companies, even back when I was a twelve year old girl and ridiculed for it. And not just a great queer love story, it's a great love story period. A person can make a credible argument for it being a one-sided -- romantic and therefore non-platonic -- love, but it's pretty hard to argue it's not a very intense one regardless.
And
I guess what I'm trying to say is: This is another read on him. And I think also a very valid one. He's one hell of an amazing character, I wish DC had handled him half as well post-Flashpoint than they did pre-Flashpoint, and I don't think a queer reading of him detracts anything from how amazing he is. If anything, I think it makes the older stuff several shades deeper (and so, so relatable, god), and I think if they decided to write him as explicitly queer now, not too many people would actually be all that surprised. With or without Ted. I can't really identify with Alan Scott, love him though I do, even though I can acknowledge that a generation of gay men likely could quite strongly. But I can identify with Booster Gold, who grew up poor and wrecked his future in part for love of family, who clawed his way out of poverty and fell back into it, who has brilliant and shining moments of courage and heart, and moments where he lands on his face, who was tough enough to survive a lot of shit but devastatingly vulnerable to exploitation, and who looks like a fellow queer kid who might've fallen for his best friend, but was surrounded by homophobia and hate and terror and buried that part of himself because the alternative might have been getting beaten and left tied to a fence to die.
#long post#michael carter#booster gold#boostle#legit tho#the eighties were fucked in so many ways#even in the very very early aughts#when i figured out i was queer myself#(and that i had fallen desperately in love with my own best friend years before)#it was still within very living memory#of that time and place
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Sonny Carisi NSFW Alphabet
I’ve been thinking about doing this for months. I waited because it takes so long for me to do. But I thought you guys desrved a New Years present- let's start it off with a smutty bang!
A big thank you to @polkadotpenguin16 for reading it over for me and giving feedback.
A= Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Sonny’s aftercare is exceptional. He takes care of you and has you settled before he even thinks about himself. He is all about intimacy, cuddles, and attention. Sometimes it’s just curling up together and falling asleep- his favorite is when you shower first. He wants to take care of you, washing your body, sliding over your curves. And if you decide you want to go another round he is more than willing to fulfill your every desire.
Other times it's pillow talk, laughs. Telling each other secrets and funny stories from your past. Baring yourself to each other- the pain and hurt you both have experienced. Talking about family and the future and what it might be- the promises he whispers against your skin. One day he was brushing your hair back and pleasure drunk you told him that one of your favorite things was having your hair played with. Now he always does it after sex, his talented fingers running through your tresses usually until you fall asleep. It was a habit you noticed that had bled over to whenever you were curled up together.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Sonny’s favorite part of himself is his arms and shoulders. While Sonny might not look it with his leaner build, he is strong. He climbed that fire escape using only his upper body strength to rescue that girl from falling. It doesn’t hurt that it is one of the areas you pay the most attention to. Often stroking and massaging him letting your hands linger.
No matter how much Sonny assures you he loves your entire body- he is very obviously an ass man. He tries not to make his staring obvious but you have practically worn through a pair of snug-fitting jeans that are Sonny’s favorite. They tightly hug your ass just right. It has gotten Sonny to stop and stare more times than you can count. You are almost positive they were the reason you got pregnant the first time. You could see his disappointment all over his face when you finally had to throw them out.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Sonny loves to come inside of you. The mix of your arousal with his seed, especially watching it drips down from your well fucked cunt to the inside of your thighs. A beautiful sticky mess that marks you as his. Your chest rising and faling rapidly as you try to catch your breath a satisfied smile on your lips. He knows one day when you’re ready, he will fuck his seed inside of you so deep it will take, permanently mixing your DNA.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Sonny loves anal sex. The first time he ever did it was at the request of his partner. He was a bit reluctant but willing to try it for his partner who raved about how amazing it made her feel. Between how tight it held his cock and the obvious pleasure it brought her Sonny was instantly hooked.
Sonny had a hard time broaching the subject with you and when he found out you had never done it before he instantly clammed up. You had been the one to catch his drift and ask if it was something he enjoyed. When he just stood there clearly weighing the pros and cons you had shrugged saying you were willing to try it. He couldn’t hide the way his eyes lit up even while asking you if you were sure. You had nodded easily simply saying “You try all the stuff I want. Let’s see if it's as good as you are making it seem.”
It was even better.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
Sonny isn’t a fan of hookups or one-night stands. He has partaken from time to time but it has always left him not quite satisfied. He craves the intimacy of knowing and loving the person you are with. He has learned from his various partners but he doesn’t know as much as men who have long Casanova phases.
What he lacks in experience he makes up for in personalization of pleasure for his partners. He is more than willing to spend hours figuring out just what you like, enjoy, and love. He is also ready and willing to try pretty much anything you are interested in.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Sonny loves it when you ride him. Your breasts bouncing in his face as your needy cunt takes all of him. He can kiss down your chest, finding a hard nipple to suck and nibble on. He can thread his fingers through your hair and pull encouraging you to look in his eyes. His hands are free to caress your curves, grab your ass, or sneak his hand between you and rub your clit until you come on his cock. He has the option to sit back and enjoy what you are doing, hands busy with your body or he can grab your hips forcing you into stillness as he ruts up into you while pulling you down onto him.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Sonny can be goofy but generally is more intense and focused on your pleasure. There are definitely times when he is more lighthearted. I think this would happen more in the morning when the two of you are waking up or lazing in bed. The teasing would ensue and lead to playful sex.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Sonny isn’t vain but he does know that presentation matters and he likes to look his best, especially when it comes to you. Sonny keeps himself clean and his hair neatly trimmed no matter how tired and busy his life is.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Sonny's intimacy is off the charts. He is a hopeless romantic- his parents have been together for over two decades. He wants to do the flowers and candles. The sweet words whispered in your ear, lingering kisses, fingertips dragging across your skin not leaving an inch untouched. Sonny plans an all-out night at least every other month though he tries to do it monthly. He lights candles, dims the lights, gets massage oil, and plans a hot bath with essential oils and bubbles for the two of you to soak in after.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Sonny masturbates quite a bit. He grew up Catholic and the guilt that came along with it. The push of abstinence and to stay free of sexual desire. It had Sonny finding release in his own hand for years. He hates feeling like he is pressuring anyone for sex and would rather get himself off than make you feel obliged to take care of him.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Sonny has a breeding kink. Everyone who grows up Catholic has a bit of one. He wants to knock you up. He wants to see you round with his baby, breast heavy, skin glowing. Sonny has a praise kink and likes sensation and impact play. He wants to spank your ass leaving it a pretty shade of pink. And anything else that can overstimulate you and leave you sensitive to his touch.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Sonny’s favorite place to have sex is in the dining room with you bent over the kitchen table. Sonny is always dominant and rough when you guys have sex there. You’ve been left with bruises on your hips and a pink ass from him spanking you more times than you can count. There are scratches on the floor that you try to cover from the table sliding back and forth.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
It doesn’t take much to get Sonny turned on. He loves you and your body but you have noticed that Sonny gets particularly handsy when you wear sundresses. Seeing you in one can make him go from “we are late” to “we have a few minutes” with one glance. When you started to notice the pattern and have sex in more risqué spots- his car, bar bathroom- you stopped wearing panties. Now he has to “check” to make sure you have all of your proper clothes when you go to see family or fancy events. He strangely never seems to make you put them on when he notices you aren’t wearing them before you leave the apartment but has left you soaked with arousal and shaking after he ate you out with the few spare minutes you had before leaving.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Sonny is never going to be okay with bringing anyone else into the bedroom. Sonny wants all of your attention and is much too jealous to share you with anyone else. He is also uncomfortable with role-playing in any scenario where consent is forced or not given. He has worked in SVU too long and it makes his skin crawl.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Sonny loves to receive oral sex but not nearly as much as he likes to give it. He has to taste you and was raised to eat his entire meal so you will just have to wait until he is done. If your legs are shaking and are almost overwhelmed by your third- or was it fourth- orgasm your arousal drenching his face and fingers he is sure you can still handle “Just one more baby, you taste so sweet, I just need one more.” You have to push him back or pull him up for a kiss to make him stop before he’s ready, sighing into his skin and telling him you’ve really had all you can take.
As much as Sonny likes to get head, he doesn’t ask for it often. Mostly because you give it so often he doesn’t have to. But when he does it's usually because he is overwhelmed and beyond stressed out. You always take your time and drag it out purposely teasing him, getting him worked up enough to not only pull your hair but to start thrusting his hips up desperately needing the relief of your mouth on his throbbing cock. You revel in his loss of control urging him to continue nails raking at the back of his hips and side of his thighs.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Sonny can be either. There is a time and a place for different types of sex and he knows it. It keeps things interesting. When you first got together with Sonny you were surprised by just how different the sex could be. Your first time was intimate and slow. He wanted you to know it meant more than just getting his dick wet. It stayed that way for a couple weeks with the added bonus of some playful lighthearted sex.
Then Sonny had been busy with a big case and you hadn’t seen him in weeks. It had ended badly and was in desperate need of salvation and a way to work off his frustration and anger. He was on you like a starved man. Urgent and demanding. He held you just a little too tight, his kisses hot forceful, his movements dominant and possessive, and downright pantie-wetting sinful. When it’s over your body is pleasantly sore and thrumming with leftover pleasure you let out a giddy laugh running a hand through your sex hair and tell him “Next time I want you to pin my hands behind my back and take full advantage of me while you fuck me in front of that mirror.” Sonny's blue eyes blaze with heat and next time is as soon as Sonny can go another round.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Sonny likes quickies! He is busy with work and after you have kids your time is pretty limited. If you guys can sneak in a quick roll in the sheets his answer is always yes. There is some adrenaline to knowing you are on a time crunch making it a more intense experience. The thought of you walking around in underwear soaked with your arousal and his come is erotic to Sonny.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Sonny is okay with experimenting for his partner but he isn’t usually the one to suggest trying new things. He does end up enjoying things you guys do together and incorporates them into your sex life. Sonny isn’t a huge risk-taker. He doesn’t want to cross lines where you could potentially get seriously hurt but he is a little risky on the location where you have sex. The riskiest location was in the backyard of his mother's house.
You had been in one of your horny moods and had been teasing him endlessly. You had a bad habit of winding him up when he couldn't do anything about it. When he was doing the dishes, you had hugged him from behind letting your hands wander to grab his cock through his jeans. He grabbed your arm and dragged you outside to the side of the house. He had spun you around forcing your hands on the siding of the house half bent over. He spanked your ass with enough force that it had its desired sting. His hand slid up your dress and rubbed you through your panties until they were soaked as he ground his cock against you. He had only undone his pants and slid your underwear to the side to fuck you quick and hard. He was just zipping up when his mother called for him out the backdoor. He had smacked your ass one more time and left you to catch your breath and gather yourself as he went inside telling his mom that he would mow her grass the next day because it was getting overgrown.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Sonny plays the long game when it comes to sex. He can be gentle and teasing and drag out the sex for hours. Sonny's refractory period is about twenty minutes to a half hour. If he is horny or has been a while without you, he could very well go all night. He always seems particularly needy when you are around your ovulation- even though he swears he doesn’t know when that is claiming that you just look damn sexy and you smell intoxicating. If you are in the mood for multiple rounds and he isn’t he just focuses on getting you off with his fingers and mouth. With his job, there is no surprise that certain cases make his sex drive tank.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
I don’t think Sonny is against toys but they aren’t his first choice either. He doesn’t use them on himself but will use them if you ask him to but he would prefer to bring you that pleasure himself. The only toys he ever bought you were anal plugs when you had agreed to try anal sex and had thoroughly enjoyed it.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Sonny isn’t a big tease. That is something you are more likely to do and he loves it. When Sonny does attempt to hold off and make you wait, he is very easily persuaded to give you the attention you want. Your whimpers and grinding against him, one “Sonny please” and his willpower is gone.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Sonny is pretty vocal. One of his love languages is words of affirmation and he loves hearing the sounds you make. He wants you to know how good you are making him feel too. He is Italian too, and they are generally loud-all of the time.
There are certain times when Sonny just wants to talk through sex. It’s not all dirty, especially during playful sex. It can be about how beautiful he finds you- body and soul. Whispering how much he loves you, how he misses you. Then there is the filth where he tells you how bad he wants to be inside you, how good you make him feel, how intoxicating you look spread out for him, how much he wants a taste but a taste will never be enough.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Sonny used to be super insecure about his size. He heard the locker room talk at school and with the way that the other guys boasted he was sure that he was average-sized at best. Sonny never watched porn as a teenager because his mom was a helicopter parent and there was nothing in her household that she didn’t know. Sonny's first time was his senior year with a girl from another school. So, Sonny never heard what went through her school like wildfire after-
Sonny Carisi was hung.
It wasn’t until after he graduated high school and started a relationship with a more adventurous and experience girl did he find out how above average he really was- “Fuck, baby your huge.” At first, he thought she was just trying to stroke his ego. He was still learning and getting more comfortable with sex. When she shook her head baffled and showed him a Google search his eyebrows had shot up and with a simple “Huh,” his insecurity dissipated.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Sonny has a tall, toned athletic body. He has a light dusting of chest hair and a happy trail under his belly button. Sonny is above average in size. He has big dick energy and the evidence doesn’t lie. He is well above average in length and pretty standard in thickness. He is a shower, not a grower.
The first time you had felt Sonny up it was a happy accident while you guys were on the couch together watching a movie. His gray sweatpants did nothing to cover his size even when he was (mostly) soft. You had tried to make it seem like you hadn’t got a good feel and Sonny had graciously let you. All the while your mind was racing with the possibilities of how big he really was and how tight of a fit it would be when you finally had sex. Your thighs had unconsciously squeezed together imagining the pleasant stretch and how deep he would be seated in your needy pussy.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Sonny has a very high sex drive. He keeps it on wraps because he doesn’t want to be viewed as a horn dog and has masterful control of it. If it was up to him, you would have sex pretty much daily, sometimes multiple times a day.
Sonny loves and takes full advantage of when you go through horny phases. He will gladly give up sleep and anything else to have all-nighters. He will keep going until the room is overwhelmed with the smell of sex and you are both sweaty, sticky, satisfied messes. He will go until you're so exhausted you don’t even want to move to clean up. He will go until you are so sensitive and overstimulated that you have to push him back unable to take anymore.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Sonny falls asleep pretty quickly after he makes sure that you get the aftercare you want and need. If he is wrapped around you or you are draped across him, he can sleep. Sonny is a pretty deep sleeper too. It is still a struggle to get out of bed with him though because he tightens his grip in his sleep when you try to get up or move around too much.
#law and order svu#svu#law and order special victims unit#sonny carisi#dominick carisi#sonny carisi x reader#sonny carisi imagine#sonny carisi x you
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