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o-no-it-all-went-wrong · 7 months ago

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Felt cute writing this, might delete later

I played and beat Rise of the Ronin, and wanted to write up something based around my favorite plot twist of the game.

Spoilers below for Rise of the Ronin, it has death, and I will disclose I did make my Blade Twin Mizu from Blue Eye Samurai. I have zero regrets

Now some context/info on my Veiled Edge prior to the snippit!!

-My Veiled Edge (usually default all names to Em) is foreign blood, she was abandoned as an infant. She sticks out like a sore thumb with thick, curly red hair and bright, round amber eyes

-A bit self shippy, but I always saw her relationship with her Blade Twin to be romantic. Like 'wives' in a sense. When the Black Ship incident occurred, her ONLY goal was to find Mizu. Playing both sides of the oncoming political war (and everyone involved) to get to this goal

-It was only after Genzui's suicide (and Fumi's "How can you create a peaceful world through war?!") that made her open her eyes and choose to fight for the greater good, putting finding her Blade Twin on the back burner

-Both times the Blade Twins fight prior to the Omi Inn Incident, Em purely protected herself and was truly heartbroken by Mizu's betrayals. She truly wanted to believe it was brainwashing by the foreign forces that caused this and held hope that she could fix this.

-She found comfort in Ryoma's company and they subsequently formed a Veiled Vow VERY PRIOR to the Omi Inn Incident (Thankfully ya girl grinded for 10 hours and got the branch where he survives thank god)

I wrote this at like 10 in the morning when I woke up, Im sorry if its not good, its self indulgent but you gotta make self indulgent stuff to thrive man

Blood was a smell all too familiar to her. Its metallic taste and copper scent were something she grew accustomed to. There was no telling how many times it accidentally got up her nose or on her tongue what times she tried to speak after a fight. No mistake as well how many clothes she lost from the stains she couldn't get off the cloth.

But this time, the smell made her sick. Two bodies lay in the room she stormed into. One she recognized little. A member of the anti-shogunate faction, that's as much as she knew. But the other... She refused to believe it was him. Her closest friend. The person that had stuck alongside her since she escaped the Veiled Edge. Her Veiled Vow Ryoma Sakamoto, leaned against a wall, drenched in his own blood. From where she stood, she couldn't see a rise and fall of his chest or a flicker of his eyelids.

"You still need... To clean up this country..." The anti-shogunate man choked out, snapping Em from her thoughts, "You need... To live..." His body began to slump as he used his final breath to speak, the thud that his corpse emitted seemed to echo in the Veiled Edge's ears. It was all becoming too real. Her mind was finally able to make ends of what she was seeing before her. The rocks that weighed her stomach down rose to her throat as she watched the scene unfold.

"He was a bad influence to you." No... She knew that voice. A sickening familiar voice that she never thought she would hear again. Her wet amber eyes flickered to her side, only to see her Blade Twin come forward, staring at the carnage before them. She turned her blue eyes towards Em, "But I've taken care of that."

'But I've taken care of that'. Those words burned into her mind. She did this...? Mizu? She killed him?? Her thoughts screamed and stayed silent all at once. Blood roared in her ears, her throat begged to yell. Her body and mind fought ferociously. She wanted to crumple to the ground and scream until her throat ran raw. She wanted to kneel and let her end come, so maybe if death took her now she could maybe see Ryoma's warm smile again. She wanted to unsheath her blade and destroy all her gaze fell upon.

"Murderer..." Her voice was little more than a shaky whisper as her gaze met Mizu's. She prayed that this was all a sort of sick joke. But this was far from it. It was the harsh reality that life was crueler than she would have ever imagined.

The overwhelming grief and pain turned to rage, the stones in her stomach turning to fire as she brandished her oxtail blade, "MURDERER!!" Every other time Em and Mizu clashed their blades, she never intended to hurt her Blade Twin. She only wished to defend herself; Mizu was simply brainwashed, she'd come around! This simply proved Em wrong. The counterpart she had been raised beside her whole life was gone. This was no longer the woman she came to care about. The one she would have burned down all of Japan to find safe and sound.

Only one thing would satisfy the inferno in her heart: to cut her Blade Twin down, just as she did her Veiled Vow.

#my writing #writing #ems writing #rise of the ronin #rise of the ronin writing #veiled egde #blade twin #self ship #self indulgence time #Im trying still to brush up on my writing #i think i did pretty good this time!

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aufhcker · 19 days ago

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[ DANCE ] for your muse to take my muse’s hand and start dancing with them // I will reply to ur stuff in a moment but I need them to dance around the castle I think it would be fun :3c either shippy or platonic both are fun it's up to you !!! :3c

RP Meme For The Mood // Accepting

Apsel leaned against the grand piano, staring up at the extensive mural above him. It was wholly intact; splashes of pale yellow and pink perfectly blended to create clouds during a sunset. A three-tiered crystal chandelier was set in the centre. Bright gold bordered the ceiling, accentuating its beauty. Some of the trim was damaged with age, debris crumbling onto the hardwood floor -- but that was easily fixed and any evidence swept away. It was the least of his worries when he first opened the doors to the ballroom. Decades of abandonment left it in such a miserable state. What was once an area of opulence had been reduced to broken foundations and innumerable amount of dust covering every inch of its exquisite appearance. Any character it had was dulled, disguised by neglect; his heart wept at the sight and he immediately set to work on restoring the ballroom to its former glory. He never quite realised how much work needed doing until he encountered numerous problems - from broken windows to rotten wood - but he refused to back down. Once he began a project, Apsel was determined to finish it. What else would a creature do in their retirement?

Part way through the restoration, he discovered a collection of old photographs hidden away in his library. It was by chance he came across them whilst cleaning, tucked inside an untitled album found within a writing desk. Each depicted various rooms of the castle, revealing their previous appearance in black and white. A blast from the past. Not much had changed since Apsel inhabited it, but they were quite clearly lived in back then. Now most of those rooms were locked and unused; he found it pointless to keep them open when it was only himself living here. But the photograph that grabbed his attention the most was one showing a magnificent soirée within the ballroom. Hundreds of elegantly dressed people were gathered in the centre, dancing with each other and creating a spectral scene from how their movements were blurred. A sense of nostalgia washed over him, remembering the many times he attended numerous social functions throughout the decades. They were a chance to meet others and have fun, forgetting any worries for one night; he could be human for a change. Nobody knew what he was, and nobody cared. His appearance may have changed, but his love of dancing remained.

The photograph helped him to understand how the ballroom used to look, referring back to it every now and again. Many months later, the project was complete. It was like stepping back in time, and Apsel felt incredibly proud of himself for accomplishing such a huge feat. Perhaps one day he would hold his own soirée here. But that was wishful thinking; with isolation came lack of connections, and he only had himself to blame for that. His lamentation was short-lived, however, with the arrival of Jack as he stepped inside the ballroom, reminding the creature that - actually, no - he was not completely alone. From the mountains of Madhee, to his own on the outskirts of Hildesheim, the man was a solid presence in his life. It was something he was grateful for as he welcomed the other to join him, offering a warm smile. Picking up the photograph from atop the grand piano, it was held out for his company to compare between then and now. Other than some alterations for the sake of longevity, it was almost identical. They soon fell into easy conversation, discussing anything that came to mind, but the night was beginning to draw in and there had to be an end. But Apsel was reluctant to do so.

"It seems a shame to restore this ballroom without bringing some life to it," he commented, knowing that once those doors were closed, it may be some while before they were open again. He decided that it was bad luck to leave the room without doing what it was designed for. "What do you say, Jack -- shall we have the first dance in this room?" Holding out his hand towards Jack, his expression softened as it was accepted. With the warm palm clasped against his own, Apsel used it to bring the other man closer towards him, settling his free hand against the small of his back as he began to lead. It was a gentle dance that covered a short area to begin with, but once they found a comfortable rhythm, they moved outwards and around the rest of the ballroom. Had this been a traditional social function, they would have needed to navigate around everyone else, but it was just them -- and it was wonderful. He missed doing this, the specific steps coming easily as though it was only yesterday, bringing back fond memories of his past. But this was now, and he wanted to stay in it for as long as possible. As he guided Jack effortlessly in careful and deliberate circles, he hummed contently as they waltzed in peace.

#mountaindmned #v; one step forward #better the devil you know ~ prompts

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mamuzzy · 11 months ago

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🍓🍅

Thank you for the ask ⸜(⸝⸝⸝´꒳`⸝⸝⸝)⸝

🍓 - how did you get into writing fanfiction? Honestly? I don't know. Sometimes I feel I shouldn't be writing because I don't consider myself well-read in literature. I'm really picky about genres when it's about actual books and mostly always go for documentaries instead of fiction. So strangely my love for writing came first and then my love for reading, and much later reading fanfictions about favorite characters were a great reintroduction for me to actual books.

My first conscious hyperfixation was Teen Titans at age 9-10, but my first fanfiction was actually from a game, Spellforce: Order of Dawn that came out around the same time. I wish I had kept it, it was written in a little teal-notebook with an usamimi anime girl on its cover. :((( I was so obsessed how pretty and badass the elves looked in that game (as pretty as it could get in 2003) that I wanted more about them. There were a few named characters in the Eloni level, and I thought: Hmm. What if they were friends? So I made them best friends and comrade-in-arms, off to kill a dragon. Nothing shippy. Just badass girls fighthing. But in the same notebook I started to write a Teen Titans fic too afterwards. :D But also around this time (and last time) I worked actively original stuff too, some self-insert urban fantasy, inspired by weird dreams.

So I think it was just about wanting a certain scenario to exist? They were in my head so much rent-free, I made them work for they stay? :D

Fanfic writing always came secondary after drawing, but after a while I stopped doing both of it. :((( I recently started again.

🍅 - give yourself some constructive criticism on your own writing

You are shit, do it better

I think I need to work on my english vocabulary and grammar especially learning how to use the different past-tenses (ughh...). I read that it's easier if you write fics right away in english instead of writing it in your own language then translate it. But when I write in english, I often feel restricted by my current knowledge. If I waited until I was good enough, then I would never share anything ^^'

Also:

I need to work on using more descriptions of body-language.

#mamuzzy answers #teen titans #spellforce #spellforce: order of dawn

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savethepinecones · 1 year ago

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4, 13 (bakugo), 10

ooh thisll be fun

4: do you have a notp in your fandom? are they a popular otp?

oh boy im about to get absolutely destroyed but tododeku. i dont read established relationships much and i prefer lots of drama but the vibe i get from tododeku is theyd get together without much hassle so i just have no interest

13: unpopular opinion about bakugou?

ohhhh boy. i dont think theres anything i can say about him that hasnt been said before. the fandom has analyzed him to hell and back and honestly i think theyve got a pretty good grasp on his character at this point so i dont think any of my headcanons would really qualify here....

i think the biggest thing would be that i think he gets too much focus in the fandom. yeah hes the foil for the mc and hes had probably the most character growth out of everyone but there are other characters yall can obsess over smh.

also i think hes much more up front about how he feels than hes portrayed as a lot of the time. the shit he keeps to himself is either stuff hes still figuring out or stuff he feels guilty about but even in the case of the latter it comes up sooner rather than later (deku vs kacchan 2 for example). once he knows how he thinks/feels he doesnt really hide it. i think a lot of the time in fics he tends to keep things pent up or is sometimes a bit tsundere but honestly i think hes much more straightforward than that. hes not afraid of consequences because he very much believes he can overcome anything with enough effort so hes going to say what he thinks and deal with the results as they come up.

ngl though most of the fic i read is shippy stuff so this may not apply in non-romantic scenarios

10: most disliked arc? why?

the pre-ua arc. mostly because the only characters we see are all might deku and bakugou and im more invested in the dynamics of the class as a whole.

early bakugou is The Worst and while i think showing that is important in order to establish how he grows as the series goes on, its not something that i especially care to rewatch. i think looking back on cringey middle school times is always difficult for me irl or otherwise so its not really a complaint about bakugou specifically but yeah.

as for all might i frankly disagree with a lot of his views on being a hero and this is when most of them are established. every time i watch this i just want to argue with him lol

and with deku tbh im just not super a fan of him??? i think part of it is because a lot of his behavior thats emphasized in canon is stuff that i personally struggle with (his tendency to worry about others to the point that he completely neglects himself for one) and while overall i think this is something the series discourages i also want to shake him and scream at him every time he does this stuff. please value yourself small green child. (also all might encourages the self sacrificing stuff and sees it as a sign of being a True Hero and this is an excellent example of what i was talking about in the previous paragraph.)

also its always kinda bothered me that the initial couple episodes are all deku trying to become a hero without a quirk but a) hes not actually doing anything to get closer to his goal (unless you count the analysis of other heroes) like he knows he wouldnt be able to rely on a quirk but hes not even trying to figure out any more obtainable alternatives hes just saying "i want to do this thing" and then not putting any effort in until all might offers to train him. meanwhile characters who are equally committed to the same goal (bakugou and todoroki for example, although todorokis situation is complicated what with endeavor being The Worst and all) are training themselves physically in addition to strengthening their quirks. i would consider deku to be more on par with characters like kirishima who didnt commit to the hero thing until their last year of junior high but that just doesnt match up with the emphasis by both deku himself and the narrative that he has always really wanted to become a hero.

also the whole "i want to become a hero even though i dont have a quirk" thing gets resolved by him just. getting a quirk?? idk i feel like bnha toys with the idea of addressing quirkless discrimination but always just handwaves it away. like oh this character wants to do something that historically has never been achieved by someone with his disability. the resolution is that he no longer has the disability.

also in the case of touya it talks about his experience having a quirk thats incompatible with his body and how that affects him and shapes him but then it just gets kinda pushed aside by endeavors influence on the situation and instead of talking about how touya was affected by a bad home life and struggling with disability and being unable to accept his limits, it just becomes "endeavor was bad at dealing with the situation and then touya became a villain" idk it just keeps skirting around this stuff that i think is important from both a world building perspective and also applicable to actual things that irl people deal with but ultimately it just dismisses it as unimportant. like objectively saying "hey the mc is considered disabled and then in chapter three is magically no longer disabled" is a dick move. yes he struggles with adjusting but like?? the emphasis was on the disability and then it immediately just removed that factor and moved on to a New Problem (oh no the quirk is Too Awesome) (because he didnt bother to do any sort of training or anything to reach his goal until all might was in the picture)

i went on a big tangent but tldr a lot of the problems i have with bnha are especially emphasized in the first five episodes or so and because of that and my lack of interest in the characters with the most screen time (sorry deku stans) i just cant stand the "training to get into ua" arc

thanks for sending the ask! i had a lot of fun talking about this and also spent way too much time on it lol

#answered asks #thegoliathbeetle #ask game #thanks again gb!!!

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lookforanewangle · 4 years ago

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a midnight snippet for @heller-jensen !!

live text under the cut:

“Why did you lie to me? About your injuries,” Cas asks, as they sit on Pam’s roof after dark. Sam is asleep in the room behind them.

Everyone else has also gone to sleep, or has at least sequestered themselves off to their own corners of the house. Dean is still restless from the past week, mind racing without any hope of slowing down, so he’d snuck out here, and Cas had followed. Dean leans forward, resting his chin on his folded arms as he stares out at the dark neighborhood in front of them.

“I dunno,” he starts, thoughts churning. “I didn’t want you to like, smite him, or anything. I didn’t know what you would do. And he’s my Dad, you know? I don’t...I don’t want to lose him.” Too, he doesn’t say. I don’t want to lose him, too.

Cas doesn’t say anything to that. He watches Dean for a moment more, and then turns his gaze out to the yard, conversation dropped. Fireflies bob between the branches of the tree next to the house, one flitting up to perch on Castiel’s shoe. Dean watches as Cas tilts his head curiously, reaching down and offering a finger for the bug to climb onto. He lifts it close to his face to examine, going a bit cross-eyed. The soft glow from the bug reflects in his eyes, electric, and Dean can’t help but smile.

“You ever been in a human before? Aside from me,” Dean asks, amusedly watching Cas watch the bug, as if he's not entirely sure what to do with it now.

“Yes,” Cas says, distracted, as more fireflies come up to perch on his fingers, one settling on the bridge of his nose. “But it has been...a while. And never one as young as you. Or Jimmy.”

#feeling some way about pre-s1 dean and cas today #currently reading and plotting a runaways/no hunters au #but then also chipping away at this verse #hci verse #heller-jensen #dean winchester #castiel #spn #lyss writes #also to be INCREDIBLY clear: we do not like john winchester in this house #but he and sam and bobby are all dean have here #he's just a teen #but his view point will change throughout the fic #also!! cas isnt /cas/ yet bc dean has only known him like. two days at this point lmao #so hes still castiel #but that will also change #(and no shippy stuff until much later)#(and yes it will be deancas)

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land-of-brains-and-chocolate · 4 years ago

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Rec list for Eddie and Symby being vaguely to very gay?

I'm sorry for coming to you with my monsterfucker agenda 😔👊 (no I'm not)

i mean, i probably could’ve seen this coming.

venom is dominated by two opposing narratives. let’s call this the “relationship narrative” and the “control narrative”. they’re not perfectly separated, like, you’ll definitely get elements of one in the other, but generally one of them describes what the story, at its core, is using the symbiote for.

now comics are an endless tug-of-war at the best of times, much less the gayest and slimiest of times. there’s a neverending backlash and backbacklash going on between these two takes. what you want is the relationship narrative.

everything very much started out with that take. eddie and the symbiote are two characters who forge an evil alliance because it lets them do what they wanna do (kill spider-man, more or less) and they have the same kinds of neuroses and complexes and syndromes. lots of early comics are also very fun about the merged consciousness, merged identity deal. that’s kind of the textbook relationship stuff.

personally i absolutely think the original stories (venom was created by david michelinie) have romantic undertones, even starting in the villainy days. eddie describes their first meeting as “a shadow moved, caressed me.” he takes the rejection of the symbiote still being “in love with” spider-man really hard. he sobs his eyes out when he thinks it’s dead and promises to avenge it bare-handed. they totally expect to live happily ever after on a deserted island together.

then there’s venom: lethal protector, which is cute on its own, but if you’re reading for slime romance, i very specifically recommend the novelisation. i won’t even spoil it. and then, planet of the symbiotes is the first comic that i would say has outright queer themes, intentional or not.

so all those recs until now are collected in this post.

we're trucking along through the 90s, we explore elements of one take and then the other and sometimes we ignore the symbiote completely, but not too much changes, overall. the next BIG stop in Gay Venom is, of course, the hunger.

miniseries by len kaminski, just venom: the hunger. plenty of people have written their essays on it, but what’s always important to me is that it DID NOT come out of nowhere. as said above, it expanded on themes that were there, it references michelinie venom very explicitly, like you get your SECOND “tenderly touching the green glass tube” scene.

but yes this one is specifically about, like, stigmatisation, otherness, mental illness, meeting all those things with care and empathy and optimism, tentacle sex. again, many essays. a venom comic that can go “look at the twisted deviance of this relationship” and then turn it around into “but how are you looking at it” is good. god how good would it be if they also did that to eddie more. anyway.

a few years later you get the first MAJOR fucking backlash, culminating in the SECOND story titled the hunger. spectacular spider-man: the hunger, from 2003. completely reboots venom and retcons their motivations and backstories, makes very spiteful references to planet of the symbiotes and the hunger, like it is not also called that by sheer coincidence. literally starts out, in a comic that wants to tackle and redefine venom, with the line “the PROBLEM is that you guys are like an old married couple”. so the new status quo is that the symbiote only ever used eddie to be with spider-man, and eddie only ever used the symbiote to not die of cancer.

the “control narrative” that really kicks in here uses the symbiote as, you know, a thing to control, eddie’s demons personified or even a completely foreign force to torment him. if eddie is evil, it’s not because of what he thinks and believes and wants, it’s because he couldn’t control the symbiote and gave in to its inexplicable bloodlust.

this is an unambiguous downgrade in terms of complexity, in my humble opinion, completely fucks up eddie’s responsibility themes, and is also a pretty clearly petty reaction to venom’s absolute oversaturation in the nineties. the bitch was everywhere and most of it wasn’t good. so there was LOTS of “look at this creepy loser” content by writers cringing themselves into self-awareness at the time. the 00s were going to be GRITTY and MATURE.

this of course means that we get to see eddie slit his wrists and bleed to death on panel after selling the symbiote to supervillains as an attempted act of redemption???

wild fucking times! it’s not exactly worth recommending as ~shippy~, but the first real backbacklash to this first round of retcons comes from dan slott, who just kind of ignores it all in new ways to die. drags eddie back to the land of the living and relevant, makes the symbiote refuse to let its new host kill him, telling that host, and reestablishing, that it loves eddie. and then, to keep him living and relevant, slott makes eddie anti-venom.

don’t even worry about it. anti-venom is essentially eddie seeking redemption with symbiote powers, but without the symbiote, except he pretty much acts no fucking different at all, just keeps on being a murderous vigilante with cracked ideas about innocence and guilt. people still act like he’s better now because, in its metatextual ways, the hunger was right.

then fucking uuuuuuhhhhhhh. agent venom. symbiote goes to flash thompson and the us military, and the writer, rick remender, goes really, really, really hard on the control narrative. the symbiote becomes a substance flash is addicted to, gives a voice to his past abuse, it’s dark times all the times.

people very much do like that narrative for flash, like at least from that perspective it was worth it. i don’t like it much for the symbiote. for the symbiote, representing everything fucked up with flash and forcing him to murder kill bite all the time is resolved via the good guy avengers literally lobotomising it so flash can wear it without further resistance or input. imagine doing that to a human person. you’re uncooperative so we’re gonna turn off your higher cognitive functions and wear you like a meat suit. happy ending for everybody! truly we’ve conquered our demons this day.

then! at the same time, there’s a cartoon coming out, it’s called ultimate spider-man. THAT one does the control narrative take with harry osborn, but then does the relationship take with flash, making it the only cartoon to outright redeem the symbiote and let it find friendship and be valued as a person.

and people loved it! so brian michael bendis gets it in his head that he’s going to redeem the symbiote and make it partner up with flash. and he does redeem it by the highly fucking questionable means of having it be “cleansed”, aka brainwashed and relieved of its memories and personality. not that it matters for long. nothing fucking matters in comics. take this with you if it’s the only thing.

so then for fun friendship times you get venom: space knight, flash and the symbiote’s adventures in space! and then that gets cancelled. eddie is off somewhere being toxin and hunting carnage (2016). many good comics but you did not ask for them.

and THEN.

it is time for the next MOTHER of backlashes.

flash gets literally discarded at fucking roadside to put the symbiote back on eddie and turn back time on their relationship to RIGHT before the FIRST backlash happened. you know, all those 2003 retcons. gone. ignored. no more. venom’s themes are now those circa 1996 again. full fucking on relationship narrative. ROMANTIC relationship narrative, and that after the symbiote was turned into eddie’s evil shadow, after he hated it and spent a LONG time seeking to eradicate all symbiotes (and not even for the first time).

the COSTA run. venom (2016). reviled and beloved.

like this comic is fucking ANGRY about symbiote treatment. i HAD to tell you all of that so you’d understand ANYTHING it’s doing. the first thing it does is flip it completely around, puts the symbiote on a military guy who’s making IT do bad things, makes his ability to control it horrifying and abusive instead of heroic and admirable. one of the later things it does (in the follow-up venom: first host) is outright feature a villain who lobotomises symbiotes, ending on a symbiote serving him swift and sweet payback by doing the same thing TO HIM. it’s exactly as unsubtle as the hunger (2003) was about its hang-ups.

comics... are a conversation.

flash remains a symbiote friend but still got fucked over big time by it all, symbiote-focused writers slott and costa also kind of use him to literally, in case anybody hadn’t caught on, literally spell out the REAL story that’s been going on in the writer's room for the past THIRTY YEARS:

you’ll notice i didn’t actually list any of the Gay Shit for you, you’ve probably already seen it or you’ll get to see it for yourself. yes, they are deeply in love, yes, it’s fucked up and flawed, yes, it is real and taken seriously and has ultimately redeeming potential. yes the concept of that nearly knocked me off my feet and in front of the subway at one point. yes there’s mpreg

it’s also fucking riddled with events, which spin off into other comics, so either ignore those and rely on the recaps OR click yourself forward through the “next issue (story)” button on marvel wikia to know what to read.

and after that must of course come the backbackbacklash, as certain as death or taxes. in the next run, we retcon everything once more, eddie just needs to control his darkness, the symbiote was an evil abuser all along, nothing on earth is ever new.

i’m not gonna go through it, i’m just gonna point you to the backbackbackbacklash issue that came out during this time: venom annual volume 2 number 1 - it’s confusingly named, it’s the one that has a blue-skinned space lady on it. this one ignores the backbackbacklash going on very pointedly and goes “it’s not ABOUT control” again, it’s pretty explicitly romantic.

and then there’s also marvel comics presents (2019) #5, which, oddly enough, does not particularly feature the characterisation you’d typically see in the relationship narrative? but it does feature eddie and the symbiote literally fucking, so you’d want to know about it.

that’s the overall, like, frame of eddie and the symbiote being in a relationship (nuh uh) (yeah they are) (NUH UH) (YEAH THEY ARE)

some stuff that’s smaller but still notable, uh.

nova (1999) 6 - 7, that’s the “we’re space married”

venom: dark origin, that’s an ALTERNATE (!!!) take on the character, don’t expect a likeable eddie but it’s very darkly funny and gay so what can i say.

venom: the end, which i would absolutely fucking hate to be canon, i think its characterisation is quite regressive, but the symbiote sure is in love, i guess.

venom: separation anxiety, the dawn of the control narrative but eddie’s characterisation did not have to go so wrong from here, like if they’d just figured out AT THIS STAGE that he's STILL acting like venom without it... i digress. it has the symbiote going eddie eddie eddieee

venom: sinner takes all, this is the first she-venom comic so that’s. hm. interesting. healing symbiote blanket

don’t read venom: license to kill just look at this panel with me

if i think of more comics worth adding i’ll add them.

the subtext slash text is heavy enough to be present to some degree in literally every cartoon adaptation of eddie brock. spider-man: the animated series goes FULL control narrative, in fact it started the “the symbiote corrupted peter” take that we to this day cannot escape, but the first few venom episodes are VERY playful about their relationship.

in spectacular spider-man it’s canon, but horrible. eddie’s in love with it, but eddie's a good boy and the symbiote is played very, very, very abusively. i think this is an evil symbiote adaptation that works well enough, at least it’s an actual meaningful character instead of just a malevolent force to resist.

in marvel’s spider-man, the only venom episode worth watching is venom returns.

i’ve actually got every symbiote-relevant episode listed right here from when we did our communal watch-through.

also watch truth in journalism. idk if it’s exactly shippy just do it

#venom #symbrock #tl;dr i wish i could tl;dr this #no off-site links to please the gods of tagging

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yeolmae-s · 4 years ago

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a chanbaek analysis from a veteran exo-l

before anything else there are a few disclaimers i'd like to make:

i am writing this analysis right now because as a non exo stan i'm not into chanbaek that much anymore. of course i like them to some degree since i'm writing this and all but it's nothing in comparison to the way i felt about them two years ago. so i feel like it's easier to keep a less clouded (?) state of mind being where i'm at right now, mentally, in regards to them. i feel like i can look at things more objectively, which is why i decided to write this and share it with you all.

for all the smart asses out there, this is a ship analysis. yes, i’m reading too much into everything. that’s what an analysis is.

all translation credits goes to @/fyeah-chanyeol

i'm a chanyeol stan. this analysis will, most likely, have more information about him in comparison to baekhyun. this is simply because i consumed more content about him since he's my bias (such as magazine interviews, fancams).

i don't stan exo anymore, but it's not because of anything they did. i liked them for a long time and made a lot of different friends because of this fandom, therefore i experienced a lot of hurt, scandals, fights and didn't deal very well with many things, so i decided to leave. this didn't happen because of exo themselves and neither did it happen because of the fandom itself. it happened because of the relationships i had.

that being said, i haven't been following them closely for the past year and a half, but i still keep up with stuff a bit, although not chanbaek related stuff since i gotta dive in kinda deeper for that lmao. so this analysis is mostly in depth for 2012-2018. if anything that you perceive as significant happened after 2018 i'm more than willing to hear your opinions about it.

so, let's get started!!

MAMA ERA

I have always felt like Chanyeol and Baekhyun's relationship was strange. I started shipping them when they debuted and more specifically because of the 130128 ISAC. When I was younger I didn't see a lot to discuss in their ISAC interactions besides it being cute and shippy, but I've started to look at it differently now.

I think everyone knows how ISAC is known for being basically a stage for fanservice. The whole "dating ground for idols" issue aside, judging from the amount of attention they direct towards the fans who manage to attend the event, idols are clearly instructed to perform fanservice. EXO's first ISAC had to be full of it, obviously, and they did give fans a lot to be happy about, content we still get giddy about to this day, and I'm sure they were instructed to act like this to please us. I don't believe that fanservice equals "false interactions": if two individuals are talking, touching each other, they are interacting, even if it is a carefully planned setting made specifically for pleasing fans. They still get reactions out of one another through these interactions, it is still relevant to the way these people's relationship will develop; even though these acts are done with the intent of pleasing a crowd.

Don't get me wrong, though. I don't think the 2013 ISAC fanservice changed anything in Chanbaek's relationship. In fact, I just want to use it as a way to illustrate something I will explain later on.

To be remembered in an industry you must have an image. You won't be getting anywhere without a carefully constructed visual image. Marilyn Monroe is always used as an example of this: she's someone you can easily make a costume of and people will instantly recognize it as her. She's basically a concept by now: blonde hair, red lips and white hair. These aspects take our mind back to her instantly. Of course, most celebrities don't achieve this type of icon status, but it is still important to cling to a specific concept/image of what you want your celebrity self to be perceived as. Without this, you'll be forgotten as soon as your career ends.

When Chanyeol debuted, he clung to the first trait they gave him: being a happy person, a.k.a "happy virus". If you were not an EXO fan back in 2013 then it's likely you're not even aware of this nickname that was given to him, but it's basically just what it sounds like (lol). He was bright, energetic, had a "teeth rich" smile (another nickname that was given to him back then), was able to give 10/10 laughter reactions to MCs and to his members jokes, was always enthusiastic to interact and smile towards fans. He even introduced himself as "happy virus Chanyeol" in interviews (and later on that changed to "EXO's voice Chanyeol" or "EXO's rapper Chanyeol").

I feel like Chanyeol was very much aware of this "must have" that I mentioned, this need to have an image pasted into yourself and have that image be what people will remember you as. We're all complex and multifaceted individuals, but the general public needs something simple to grab on to, something easy to remember. That happy guy from EXO? I know who he is! I'm sure this is the path Chanyeol chose, back when he debuted: to pick a trait given to you by the public and make it a huge part of your image.

However, that image of him didn't last very long. It certainly became tiring to worry so much about how he was being perceived, to carefully construct something so his career would last, specially when his group had so many scandals and went through a sudden burst of popularity that changed their lives completely. By 2017, Chanyeol already had a change of mind in relation to his career, these changes being mostly due to how he felt about music and what he wanted to do with it.

He recognized himself as having always being impatient, which might be the reason why he clung to a specific image so fast right after debuting:

From Fall Magazine in 2017

"At the moment I just want to enjoy myself with the music as it comes, without feeling as though I have to do something. It isn’t a greed from impatience, I could call it more of a greed to do better."

"When I first debuted I thought I was very optimistic, but as time has passed I think a more reserved side of me is showing."

"I think I've grown in many ways. Maybe it’s because it’s as though I perform everyday, but the stage has become comfortable for me. Shall we say I’ve become more calm and composed? [...] I think I’ve become more mature."

He matured. He's still bright and energetic but he's also more reserved. He managed to keep up the fanservice that his fans adore in a way that is more fitting to his actual personality. It still is an image, but an image that's not as exhausting as his previous one, with its strict demands to act in a certain way all the time. I remember specific interview with MCs demanding him to smile (although jokingly, of course) saying things like "Aren't you EXO's happy virus?", so I'm sure he felt pressured.

This is interesting to think about when put side by side with his relationship with Baekhyun. Back when they debuted, Chanyeol and Baekhyun were close friends that clearly felt comfortable with each other, and it isn't surprising to think that Baekhyun would be Chanyeol's first pick when he thought about doing fanservice with someone. Of course, I can't exactly pinpoint their first fanservice moment since I'm not a walking EXO encyclopedia anymore, but I can say with certainty that both of them felt like it worked as soon as they first tried it with the fans, and that's the reason why they kept doing it. Conveniently, they were both good friends, so all was good.

Until well, it wasn't.

At some point, Chanyeol's interactions with Baekhyun seemed too eager for Baekhyun himself. There are various moments where this is visible, such as this one:

Why are you grabbing my wrist out of nowhere young man........

Or...

That one pic where Jongdae, who was in front of them, looked so damn uncomfortable I can't even bring myself to google it

Of course, they had some over the top fanservice that did work out pretty well, such as this one, both of them imitating Jonghyun's and Taemin's Internet War stage, which seems a little scripted now that I look at it properly, with Baekhyun seemingly expecting Chanyeol to do whatever it is that he did on that day. (Can you imagine this: both of them backstage, watching Jonghyun's and Taemin's performance in silence, and one of them just blurts out "We should do that too!". What the fuck was going on)

By the way, if you have never seen the original Internet War performance, you can watch it here.

This is what they were imitating.

Tumblr won’t let me upload the gifs for this moment for some reason, so here and here.

You can't tell me Baekhyun wasn't expecting it already, lol.

Now, know what this moment reminds me of? ISAC. On their Internet War imitation moment, Baekhyun seemed fine, playful, even, agreeing. During ISAC, however, doing basically the same thing again (this time on a lighter way even; since they weren't, you know. Imitating a strong performance such as Internet War.), he appears reluctant. It's a bit painful to watch.

What changed? The ISAC event happened a few months after the SMTOWN concert where they did the Internet War thing, so what made things become so different?

If this has enough likes I’ll make a second part!

#i got tired halfway through writing and i decided i needed some motivation to finish this so i'm posting it the way it is lmao #chanbaek #baekyeol #park chanyeol #byun baekhyun #exo #kpop

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reallunargift · 2 years ago

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gonna blabber more because yes, as unsubtle as my shippy art and tags can be, I also imagine them as quite... low-key a lot of the time. Of course there is passion and drama and conflict (SO much conflict), but the trope of looking at the one you love fondly without telling them outright how you feel is *chef's kiss* and Presságio is perfect for that and at the end of this post I talk more about it. But mostly I'll talk about Port and nyo!Spain and I don't promise much coherence, it's more of a stream of consciousness.

Ok so I think about these two a lot and while my base personality for the canonverse and nyoverse characters is the same, the way they were treated in society was not and that influenced their development and the way they interact with others.

I've said before that Port's way of expressing his feelings for Toni varied depending on whether they were on equal terms/his own power. The same is true when it comes to nyo!Spain, except I think it was easier to make his feelings clearer without having to spell them out. Because there were certain conventions to follow and expectations, and I see them taking full advantage of those.

You look at courtly love and all and see small gestures/gifts being taken as obvious declarations of love. Stuff that could be brushed off as "they're best friends, what a strong friendship :)" between two men or two women would be seen as clearly romantic with a man and a woman. (Of course the other side of the coin is that chances to be alone with each other were harder to come by than with regular spaport or nyo!spaport)

Also I like to imagine the reps travelling to attend royal weddings if possible because it's more opportunity for interactions, and Portugal had so many with the neighbouring kingdom that Port and nyo!Spain would have met under friendly circumstances many times. I'm especially unhinged about Manuel I and Isabel of Aragon and the sense they must have faced that holy shit this is it, they're really gonna merge the kingdoms with Miguel's birth, better start acting like the married couple you're gonna be soon. It did not go that way, of course (not until later and in different circumstances anyway), but I think here was when most of the obvious shows of love would have happened on Port's part.

I'm super worried about making spa/port ever seem like a sea of roses because it's not, and not acknowledging the bad times is the one thing that turns me off of a ship immediately, so again, there was a LOT of conflict between Port and nyo!Spain too. Things could get nasty real quick, but that's part of why I love them too, and it makes the sweet moments all the sweeter. Because ah look at what could be. It also makes the bitter moments all the more bitter. I can't explain it, but if something seems possible yet is not happening... it must be because one (or both) is choosing not to make it happen. It's a choice, a conscious refusal, and that hurts more.

But that's not the point of this post, the point of this post is to ramble about these two while my food is in the oven, but especially that specific flavour of soft and unspoken love, of Port gifting nyo!Spain a fan and the next time seeing her use it while talking to someone or other about politics and smiling to himself before doing the same. The warmth in his heart when centuries later they're all having an informal get together and it's a hot afternoon and she whips it out and fans herself while complaining about the sangría.

So Presságio's lyrics are actually the poem "O amor, quando se revela" by Fernando Pessoa, just with some stanzas repeating. There are quite a few musical adaptations, but Júlio Resende's piano really embodies the softness that I imagine for this trope with Port and nyo!Spain.

Love, when it reveals itself, Does not know how to reveal itself. It knows well* how to look at her But does not know how to speak to her.

Someone who wants to say what he** feels Does not know what to say. He speaks: it looks like he lies... He keeps quiet: it looks like he forgets...

Ah, but if she could guess If she could hear the look And if a look was enough for her To know that she is being loved!

But someone who feels a lot, keeps quiet; Someone who wants to say how much he feels Ends up with no soul nor speech Ends up alone, entirely!

But if this could tell her What I do not dare tell her, I will no longer have to speak to her Because I am speaking to her...

*Sabe bem can mean two things: To know well, and to taste/feel good. So this line means "(the lover) knows well how to look at her (the beloved)" and "it feels good (for the lover) to look at her (the beloved)"

**I used "he" for ease of reading because in pt the personal pronouns are dropped and using "one" seemed a little too fancy but using "they" ran the risk of making it seem like different perspectives are in play when it's all from one person's point of view.

And yeah, listening to it gives me the most vivid image of Port looking at nyo!Spain as she does whatever mundane little thing, sighing in mild frustration at the impossibility, and continuing staring. idk, I love yearning and so does he

Also I know I didn't really go into nyo!Spain's side much in this post, partly because the song/poem that sparked it made me think of Port's pov, but I think she's more frustrated than him lmao. Because she knows how he feels, yet it's him also doing most of the stubborn refusing, and then he has the gall to look at her like that, like they're some impossible, doomed thing.

I am once again thinking about them (PortxnyoSpa) and how perfectly salvador’s presságio fits them 😔

#lunie blabbers #idk what this is. pretend you and i are at a café and you activated my fandom ship trap card #but what is this blog if not a repository for my random hetalia thoughts??#hws portugal #hws spain #aph portugal #nyo!spain #spaport #carnation pair #hc #in a way #also this is neither here nor there but i dreamt unamuno followed me on tumblr and i had to block him for posting iberism on main

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fleur1005 · 2 years ago

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YiZhan fandom interviews!! 003 @OldObsess/overthinkingthis

I am so thankful that not only she accepted this interview, but accepted it with eagerness! 🙏 I was actually very excited about finally being able to talk to her because one of my first fics I read in this fandom was hers (and is my favorite to this day) and it was rec’ed by none other than Ren 😆 Now you can imagine what fic that is lol, but I digress. So without much ado… here’s Tee, aka @OldObsess!!!

▪️ Please, tell us about yourself. How you like to be called or how you go by in this fandom and how long you’ve been in the swamp.

i respond to a lot of names in this fandom, it's all good. on twitter, i'm @oldobsess... if i could do it again, i'd probably pick a new handle, but i had never used twitter before this fandom, so didn't know what i was doing! my first screen name was "too old to obsess over 💚❤️" and then sometime later i decided that there was no shame in being an older fan, so i changed it to "never too old to obsess over 💚❤️" 😂

on ao3, i'm "overthinkingthis" — i deliberately picked a different handle entirely because i had never read or written fics before, and wanted to keep my fic activities separate, like a secret side thing. that did not last long. again, shedding the shame!

on tumblr i'm "overthinkingyizhan" but i'm new to tumblr so there's not a lot going on there yet.

fandom friends also call me tee, and that works too!

how long have i been in the swamp? i watched cql in march 2020... my family watched it first, and i had no interest in watching with them until i saw xz's face. i literally asked, "why is that man so beautiful???" i watched the entire series twice, read mdzs a couple of times, and then one day i was listening to wuji and thought, "are the actors singing this as a duet?" i googled them, was horrified by 227, amazed by yibo's dancing, and then started mainlining the official bts and all the fan analysis videos on youtube. i was so charmed by how happy they looked together, but i'd never shipped anyone in my life before, so wasn't sure what to make of all the shippy stuff. i came to yizhan twitter in april 2020 to find out what happened to them after weibo night (aka "divorce night"). what finally threw me into the pit was seeing video of yibo looking teary in a ddu clip from the first taping after 227... i remember thinking, "oh my god, he really loves him."

wow, i'm rambling. let me let you ask your questions!

Ooh, I’m loving your story…! You could keep going and I can keep listening/reading it… 🥹🥹🥹

So it was the first time you shipped someone???

yes, this is my first and only fandom! i was very lucky to find really good friends in the fandom when i came to twitter, and they have been such good guides. that's one of the reasons i love what you're doing with this project (and i very much vibe with your "omg how can i organize all this information" panic because that's how i ended up on ao3!) i could go on, but let me answer your next question:

▪️ Where are you most active/ favorite place to dabble in fandom-wise? (Twt, tumblr, ao3, pixive, privetter, etc)

i'm most active on twitter as @oldobsess… i've posted more works on ao3 than i ever expected to, and i have a tumblr that i hope to use to archive more of my collected fandom candy if i ever find the time

▪️ I’ve also been very fortunate to be in friendly fandoms, but being this your first, were you surprised by the toxic side of it when you found out?

yes! i mean, because i learned about 227 right away (it had just happened when i started watching cql in march 2020), i learned about antis very early on. i don't really understand why anyone takes the time to hate a character or celebrity when they can spend that time on the character or celebrity they love, but sadly, i know now that there are people who do that in every fandom.

i was also very surprised that dynamics is a thing some people get very worked up about, especially with an rpf ship where no one has any idea what people do in private. i've tried to be more mindful about it now that i know it's a thing, but i wish everyone could assume more positive intent when it comes to this particular topic. personally, if i see or read something that isn't my thing, i don't stop to comment and i don't like to do callouts in public. (that's what private chats with friends are for!) instead, i scroll on by or use the back button. i don't like to give fandom wank more exposure by posting about it publicly. there's enough negativity in the world as it is — i don't need to add to it!

i'm also aware that as an rpf shipper, i have to be careful about where i do my screaming. i don't do it on posts by official accounts (whether in comments or qrts). also, i follow a fair number of solo accounts because we share a love for either xiao zhan or yibo, but i am careful not to say shippy things on their posts... i think that's basic courtesy, because they're entitled to do fandom the way they like. if i don't like the way they do it, i scroll by or i can block if it's really something i don't want to see. some solos block me, and i prefer they do that than to say unkind things to me.

basically, i try to follow the golden rule... how would i feel if something said X to me? i feel like i've had a relatively drama-free fandom experience by following these guidelines. fandom should be fun, so as long as you're not hurting anyone, you do you!

I very much share the same opinion about how to handle 🐜.

Now that you bring up the topic about the dynamics, I think it’s a cultural thing b/w Asian countries and Western countries. They simply have different backgrounds of how they came to be and have very different view points. They can’t really be compared. But I still love both styles.

▪️ What was your first motivation to start writing/ drawing about them?

before this fandom, i never read or wrote fic! and i had no idea rpf was a thing! to be honest, i was a little weirded out by the idea of reading or writing fic about real people. 🙈 but then after spending hours chatting about ggdd candy with my first fandom friends, i felt completely overwhelmed by the need to organize everything they were sharing with me. (also remember that the pandemic lockdown had just begun, so i was going a little stir crazy and needed something to do with all my restless energy.)

one night, we were musing over when ggdd might have first gotten together, and one of my friends told me that a significant minority of cbxg (chinese ggdd shippers) believe they got together BEFORE cql. i demanded to know more about this theory, and after countless hours of drowning in candy from 2017, i decided i had to write a fic with this alternate timeline or i would lose my mind.

i opened an ao3 account and started posting "we are made to love" in june 2020. https://archiveofourown.org/works/24669283/chapters/59612737 i had no idea what i was doing! i just wanted to write something about all the candy for myself and to amuse the three fandom friends i had then. 😂 but then what started out as "maybe i'll write 15k on this, 20k tops" turned into a 20-chapter, 83k work that took me six months to post in full.

i swore all along that i would write that one fic to get it all out of my system, and then never write again, but that did not happen. these two beautiful and talented individuals are just too inspiring! i've created or co-created over 50 works since then, but wamtl is still my best-known work.

sorry, these responses are just so long! renren was so much more succinct... please feel free to tell me to shut up hahah

No, I won’t cos I’m enjoying this way too much myself 🤭

▪️ How many fics/ fan arts have you written/ drawn so far? Which one is the one that you’re most fond of and why?

i've written 45 fics (including two drabbles that i drew art for, and one anonymous work). i co-wrote an additional eight fics with friends. i also posted two works (a recipe and a knitting pattern) that were part of an art/fic collab that i did with some creative fandom friends.

i don't know how to answer this question (about what fic i’m most fond of)! i've been asked before, and my answer changes all the time. it depends on my mood, and also on what it means to be fond of a work. sometimes a fic is bound up in the feelings i had when i wrote it, or who i was writing it with or for. if you asked me what fic of mine i would most want to reread, that would also depend on my mood. do i want to laugh or cry?

i am really fond of "talk to me," which is the fic i HAD to write after i saw an article about a japanese man who rented himself out as a "rental-san" to keep lonely people company... i was absolutely seized with the idea of writing yibo as a "rental-ge," hired by xiao zhan to listen to him talk about a boyfriend who keeps breaking his heart. it's also a wholesome t-rated fic, and soft getting-together fics are really my jam.

i'm also very fond of "lying in the dark (no sunshine)," which is my angsty break-up/make-up fic. it's based on the movie "eternal sunshine of the spotless mind," which is one of my favorite movies. i am also in love with the concepts of memory and forgetting, and this fic is a long meditation on those themes.

i'm really cheating now, but i am super fond of my tattoo and tentacle aus ("under my skin" and "wrapped up in you" ) because i wrote them with and for dear fandom friends, and so both were so much fun to write. when i re-read them, i think of these friends, and the warm feelings i have for this fandom.

Ooh, I’m glad you mentioned “Wrapped Up in You” cos it’s been one of my first fics I read when I came into this fandom and was rec’ed by none other than Ren and it’s one of my fave fics for so many reasons! 😆😆😆

*screaming* i cannot believe that you joined this fandom and read TENTACLES right off the bat 😂😂😂 i love that! 🐙

▪️ What’s your favorite trope to write/draw or a new one that you want to try this year?

"established relationship" is my most common "additional tag" for my fics! i just adore writing yizhan all soft and secure with each other, even if they're sharing insecurities or bickering. to me, they fit together like puzzle pieces, so no matter what i put them through in the story, when i get to the parts where they're settled and happy, with all the trust and fondness that comes with that, the writing feels effortless.

among the projects i want to finish these year is a getting-together rom-com, a sci-fi au, and a fairy tale! occasionally i think about writing more "canon" fics based on real-life candy that they throw out there, but i also feel like i've written so many of them already, and i have a lot of other ideas i'd like to try to write.

oh, i should say, since this is supposed to be a guide for baby 🐢, i've dumped a ton of links to candy in the endnotes to a lot of my fics, especially wamtl and the fics in the "extra chapters" series. since i started writing fics as a way to organize my thoughts and the fandom candy, i actually do continue to revise the endnotes as i come across new sources (and if links go dead, i try to fix them). ideally, i would post all these links to tumblr so people don't have to go to my fics to find the links, but there are only so many hours in a day!

Wow, I’m amazed at how organized and prolific you are!

▪️ Are you bjyx, zsww or lsfy? Is this dynamic important to you?

i would say i am lsfy. i do not care about who does what physical act. i do care about characterization, and to me, that is completely separate from how the characters have sex. if a fic is written well, and the way yizhan is written feels real to me, i don't care how they have sex (or if they do at all).

one of the things i've really enjoyed about writing yizhan fics is that because they are both men, i don't worry about gender baggage the way i might if i were writing a m/f fic. i have the freedom to flip things around to fit the story and i don't spend emotional energy worrying whether having a character cook, cry, or apologize — or bottom — is gender-coded. honestly, i spend enough time irl worrying about race and gender, so i like that these are not issues i need to think about when i write yizhan.

so yeah, at this point, i have written all possible dynamics (and with tentacles, you really can do everything, everywhere, all at once 😂)!

i do try to tag my fics for dynamics (the actual sex act, not for vibes or characterization) so that people who *do* care can find what they want to read. i'd rather that someone who cares a lot about such things is able to avoid reading a fic of mine that doesn't suit their tastes so they don't feel compelled to write me a nasty note (also, readers, don't do this. there's a back button for when that happens).

That seems to be a very important issue in this fandom, they even have names for each dynamic. That a first for me and it was another thing that surprised me as a new 🐢.

▪️ What’s your most fave 🍬? Have you written about it? Where do you get your 🍬 sources?

i don't know if i can pick a favorite candy! like renren, i love the tattoo cpn, and so i wrote an entire fic about them having tattoos ("under my skin," in which xiao zhan is a tattoo artist and yibo is an idol who meets xiao zhan and suddenly wants to be inked all over his body haha).

i am fascinated with kadian, which is a kind of number language that's popular in china. i honestly thought it sounded far-fetched the first time i was introduced to it, but over the course of the years i've been in this fandom, i've seen enough evidence to know that kadian is real and yizhan use it (for example, 520 means "i love you" because the chinese numbers read out loud (wo ai ni) are a homophone for 我爱你, or "i love you" — may 20 (5/20) is a nationally-recognized couple's day in china for that reason)... yizhan (and all of their endorsements) post at 8:05 or 10:05 frequently because those timestamps represent their birthdays. there are many examples of different codes in wide use in china that have shown up in yizhan's various socmed posts... and there there are all the 18s (一八 sounds like yibo) and 3s (三 sounds like zhan).

i do incorporate kadian in nearly all of my fics in some way (and there's a whole chapter about it in wamtl), often because i’ll have yizhan post not-so-secret kadian messages to each other over weibo and oasis.

i even embed kadian codes into the word counts for nearly all of my fics, i'm that obsessed.

twitter followers know i post about kadian a lot too!

my first fandom friends have been such excellent sources of candy... @ShirasagiS @VenOceanofStars were the ones who spent hours talking to me about the candy that cbxgs had unearthed when i was writing my first fic. they helped me so much with translations (translation from chinese can be so difficult, especially when it's xiao zhan who's posting... he loves the word play and can get very literary in his wording).

other good accounts to follow to stay on top of weibo/oasis posts, endorsements, past appearances and such are @wxyzybxz @bjyxiaos @bjyxnoa @sunhuas

i also follow some solo accounts... although they don't *intentionally* deliver candy, they always have great content about xiao zhan and yibo.

candy also comes my way through chats with friends!

i'm not on tumblr much, but i like UntamedConnotations and AccioVictuuri for roundups of candy that aren't captured as well in tweets

Wow, thank you for sharing with us so generously your sources! I for one am very grateful cos I didn’t know several of them.

▪️ Open topic: hot/latest topic of the boys and/or fandom.

the latest hot topic!? i think it has to be yibo's new song, his performance, and his many, many posts about them! it's ticking all the boxes for me... a GORGEOUS, heartbreaking song, a beautiful and emotional performance, and a tidal wave of posts about it, with kadian, possibly hidden messages, and yibo looking incredibly handsome.

just today, he posted pictures of himself in a hoodie with a rainbow logo and his ever-present 🦴 necklace, and combined with a song and performance that already feels like yibo baring his soul in a way we haven't seen before, it's just SO MUCH and i am just in awe of how comfortable he is in his skin, how unapologetic he is about who he is... and how safe and secure he must feel to be able to shout all this out. i realize i could be completely deluded, and that none of this has to do with love, or that maybe he loves someone who isn't xiao zhan, but after all that i have seen over the past few years, i'm not sure how else to harmonize it all if they aren't szd. if nothing else, it makes me so happy to imagine that they've really found a love like this with each other, and for me, that's been the joy of being in this fandom (especially these last few years, with all that has been going on in the world).

anyway, i like to tell people that i fell into the wangxian pit because of xiao zhan's beautiful face, and that i tripped and fell into the yizhan pit because of yibo's lovesick face. everything about yibo's "like a sunshine" song and performance is just making me even more emotional about them and the epic romance that i see between them, and it brings me so much joy.

▪️Now that you bring up about the the 🦴 necklace, do you think the necklace is actually XZ’s gift? Does it really have a 王 engraving on it? Do you think the 🦴 necklace some kind of statement?

i'm not sure if it's really engraved with a 王... but i think the 🦴 is (1) a gift from someone special because yibo wears it so frequently... you only come back to a piece of jewelry that often when it has great personal meaning... especially when you are someone who wears fancy accessories for work all the time. it has shown up in inappropriate times too, like under a period costume on set, when he's not supposed to be wearing personal jewelry... that tells me it means something very special, because he just won't take it off. and (2) i think it's from xz because he has called yibo a puppy (gouzaizai), there was that time yibo's co-star from LoF said in a livestream that he can't call yibo gouzaizai because he's not xz (which tells me that other people know about xz using that term of endearment)... also xz has called yibo clingier than jianguo (comparing him to a pet), so yeah... i think it's really only xz who could give yibo a 🦴 necklace 🥰

could it be another person? i guess if i am wrong about them being szd, it could be someone else... but to me that would mean he's in a relationship with someone else. i have jewelry that other friends have given me that i wear on occasion, but the pieces that i wear all the time are the ones my husband has given me.

In between this answer and the next question, we both became a crying mess remembering the beautiful and meaningful dance performance of Yibo’s LtS at the New Year’s Gala, till we regained our composure, lol

▪️ How did you come to meet your good friends when you first started out in fandom?

when i first came to twitter in early april 2020, i really didn't know where to start. i wasn't a twitter user, and i'd never done the fandom thing before. i lurked for awhile, following solo accounts (at first, just xfx, because i was really worried about how xiao zhan was doing... it was still very early after 227). i stumbled over ventus's (@VenOceanofStars) posts, and spent a few long nights scrolling her posts of old candy. she noticed that i was liking literally hundreds of her posts, and dm'd me to ask me "how old is too old to obsess over ggdd?" and that's how we became friends. 🥰 she introduced me to @ShirasagiS and the three of us spent a lot of time just talking about ggdd and c-ent generally, since they are fluent in chinese (i am also asian, and although i've been perpetually trying to learn chinese, it's been a slog!)

i also found @BjyxObsessed because i thought her pinned tweet was hilarious and it spoke to me (back then, it was all about the shock of falling into this shippy pit as an older fan), and because i am not a shy person, i slid into her dms and forced her to be my friend. 😂 she introduced me to the world of rp fiction, and her sweet and funny fics were among the first i read (in any fandom!)

that's generally been my pattern... i see people around who might share an opinion or a demographic (a lot of my fandom friends are older fans with families and irl jobs) and i might dm them to see if we click. sometimes we do, sometimes we don't (and that's okay!)

when i finished posting wamtl and realized i was not done writing after all, i helped put together a discord server with some other writing friends, a place where we could encourage one another as we prepared for an upcoming fic exchange that we were all participating in. that was a great way to make friends... gathering around a common creative interest, be it writing or art or maybe just yelling about the boys.

some of those writers have since moved on, and some new writers have joined... it's sad when friends go on to other fandoms or to other interests, but i'm told this is a natural ebb and flow of fandom, and so i've learned to roll with it and keep making new friends.

somehow, nearly five years after yizhan started filming cql together, new 🐢 still find their way here, and i like to think that that's a testament to how beautiful and real their story feels.

▪️ Okay, I have the exact same question. How old is too old? Because I regard myself as one of the older 🐢 age-wise. I was VERY relieved to see several 30+ or 40+ in fandom 🤭

well, i don't like to tell people how old i actually am because i feel like putting a number on it might make people wonder if they're too old (if they're older than i am)... i prefer the mystery! but yes, i've been told that my saying i'm an older fan makes other older fans feel more comfortable with being here, and that's nice to know!

i do have readers and followers who i know are older than i am, and i think that's awesome!

▪️ Lastly, a piece of advice for newbie 🐢, please!

i would second renren's advice to respect the boys, their business partners, and their co-stars/friends and don't write shippy things on their posts. think of the golden rule before you hit "send" on things... how would you feel if you were yibo or xiao zhan and people were yelling shippy things on your work projects? for that reason, i try to keep my nonsense within this fandom bubble... i don't hashtag with their names, and i don't interact with solo accounts unless i *know* they're tolerant of cpfs.

the other thing i would say is to spend your energy positively. being excited about yizhan's projects and their accomplishments does not mean you have to trash someone else... that's a really bad look, and can only make trouble for them (and especially don't do that if you're using them as your profile picture because it reflects badly on them).

finally, don't evangelize. if people see what you see and want to find out if they're szd, they'll find their way here. arguing with people and trying to "prove" to outsiders that they're together is bad form... remember that we really don't know anything. i might personally feel they're szd, but if other people don't see it, i respect that too. THAT SAID... if they trip and fall into the pit the way i did, i'll do what i can to make them feel welcome so they can enjoy a positive and joyful fandom as i have!

END

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shipcestuous · 3 years ago

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[1] I think Medici is a great series for shippers who like brother/brother stuff and political intrigue in a period setting. The first season, Masters of Florence, had Cosimo and Lorenzo, the sensitive artist and the party boy full of hidden angst, always supporting and staying loyal to each other until the circumstances eventually led Cosimo to suspect Lorenzo had betrayed the family, and Lorenzo to fear that Cosimo valued him less than and would replace him with his best friend/right-hand man.

[2] Season two, The Magnificent, has a similar dynamic with Cosimo's grandsons, the idealistic but conflicted Lorenzo and the cynical hedonist with a secret romantic side Giuliano, raised by a less manipulative and strict father but still feeling all the pressure that comes from being born into one of the most important and controversial families in town. They also have a sister, Bianca, but she doesn't get many shippy moments with either...

[3] The main focus of Bianca's arc is a Romeo and Juliet -type affair with Guglielmo Pazzi. The Pazzi family are bankers like the Medici family, and they're also their bitterest rivals. Anyway, the interesting thing here is that Guglielmo has an older brother, Francesco, and in a way, they follow the same scheme as the Medici brothers. They were raised by their uncle Jacopo, a ruthless man who did everything he could to put them against the Medici family and fan the flames of hatred and spite.

[4] Jacopo even tore Francesco and Lorenzo apart when they made friends as children, punishing Francesco so harshly for it, that he actually turned into the Medici brothers' rival and showed them nothing but contempt for year. But while his older brother turned cynical and wary, Guglielmo remained idealistic and innocent despite their uncle's influence, genuinely falling in love with Bianca and wishing for reconciliation between their families to be able to marry her and live happily with her.

[5] When Guglielmo and Bianca secretly elope and Lorenzo finally gives in to his sister's wishes and tries to find a way to get Jacopo to agree to their marriage, Jacopo obviously disapproves, tries to drive the couple apart, and decides to cut all contacts with Guglielmo if he won't cave in. And here comes the good part... because Francesco, while not really on board with Guglielmo's affair and elopement, loves him too much to let Jacopo mistreat him and push him away. And he's ready to act.

[6] Francesco, the nephew who followed Jacopo's directives and bought into his rivalry thing for years, suddenly turns his back on him and decides to side with Lorenzo during a very important vote. All for Guglielmo, as he scornfully says to Lorenzo when the latter tries to thank him for it. But then he actually reconciles with his old friend later on, making his brother's wish for unity and peace come true (... albeit briefly, because then Drama starts happening again). It's really sweet.

Cracky addendum to all the Medici stuff: I love to think that Lorenzo was so open to reconciliation with Francesco not only because he was on his family's side during a very important event and because they used to be friends as children, but also because he thought something like, "well, we didn't have a good relationship in years, but he's clearly still worth being friends with because he, too, loves his dumb, reckless siblings - I have someone to talk about Bianca and Giuliano with!"

Thank you for writing this up about Medici. I have never seen the series but I have always been curious about it. (I'm sorry you had to wait three years for my reply!)

It's sounds like the brothers shipping is first rate!

Cosimo and Lorenzo did come up once before, here. It seems like a brother/brother relationship that would have a lot of shippers.

I like the sound of Francesco and Guglielmo in particular, when Francesco turns and stands up for his brother despite taking more after their uncle. That sounds like a great arc.

#asks #anonymous #medici #cosimo and lorenza #r: brothers #nc #nr #commentary #noiv #first post #giuliano and lorenzo #francesco and guglielmo

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dontcallmecarrie · 4 years ago

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Honestly I just want to see Steve's point of view of that meeting where Hammer is a consultant, like, the full meeting and Steve just. Comparing his interactions with Tony, and Justin's interactions with Tony, because I love me some shippy angst pining.

Or some bullet points I don't even care anymore, I'll take anything you want to give because I AM LIVING FOR THIS AU

"How'd they even get you here, anyway?" Tony asked, and Steve couldn't help but notice that Hammer's smile warmed as he turned to face him.

"Your friends have been up to some pretty interesting stuff, Stark. R&D'd have my hide if I didn't give them at least a chance at poking some of the alien tech you guys've been dealing with." Hammer shrugged.

"Huh. Last I checked, wasn't that more my brand than yours?" Tony raised an eyebrow, smile not once wavering.

"You're out of the game, Stark. Don't be surprised if the playing field's changed."

"What's the record right now, anyway, two tanks?" Tony asked, and Steve couldn't help but blink because what?

Hammer noticed their confusion, and he looked vaguely amused. "My company. A video a while back went viral, some private's gun got caught up in a tank's tracks and was recorded to have continued to work just fine after the sand was cleared out of its gears. A few dings, sure, but..."

Tony snorted. "Gun equivalent of a Nokia. And about as new, too."

Hammer gave him a reproving look that did nothing to the amusement tugging at the corners of Tony's mouth, and Steve felt something clench in his stomach for a moment before he forced himself to focus, just in time to catch the tail end of what he'd been saying.

"—an't be knocking out ten thousand patents a year, Stark, some of us are human beings who like to eat and sleep once in a while."

Tony shook his head, arms crossed but still looking the most amused Steve had ever seen him. "Sure, sure. How's alien tech fit into this?"

Just like that, all levity disappeared from Hammer's frame, as he leaned back into his chair and rolled his eyes before facing Director Fury. "What one of your agents had proposed was first crack at that, potential for intellectual property rights on top with the caveat for some contract negotiations down the road. But nothing in writing, so if you want my cooperation, you'll want to get on that."

Agent Romanov looked between him and Tony, and frowned slightly.

Noticing her look, Hammer gave her a polite— if significantly much colder— smile. "Oh, I'm afraid if you wanted us to compete, you're a tad bit late. If Stark were in the business, then sure, this would be the point where we'd be negotiating and lowering our asking prices. But he's not, so I'm afraid we're going to be having a very different conversation."

"Think of this way, Agent." Tony said cheerily, "You guys get two experts for the price of one. Well...as much as Hammer can be an expert, anyway."

"Excuse you, I do know what I'm talking about. Oh— don't worry, agents, my rates are very reasonable."

The rest of the meeting went by in a blur as quite a bit of legalese that flew way over Steve's head got thrown around and all he could notice was the way Tony had enjoyed the spectacle, at one point even pulling a small bag of blueberries from who-knows-where as things got derailed.

Director Fury, Deputy Director Hill, and the SHIELD agents all looked very stressed, after the fact; apparently, Hammer had gotten exactly what he'd wanted, which was...exactly what a ruthless businessman who'd been neck-deep in the defense industry would want.

A lot of concessions, quite a bit of quid pro quo, and all the while Hammer had never stopped acting like he was the one who held all the cards and Steve knew why but it still rubbed him wrong.

Well, no, he knew why.

Steve had gone through the file SHIELD had on Tony— partly because he was Howard's son, and later, because Steve wanted to get to know him even if he kept everyone at an icy distance.

On paper, Tony and Justin Hammer were very similar.

Incredibly so, actually; enough that Steve was willing to admit that a good chunk of why they'd all been so caught off-guard by Hammer was because, well, Tony's brand of professionalism was something they were all used to at this point. Having someone else with with similar experience but a different perspective was the entire reason SHIELD had called in Hammer— or, well, that's how Agent Coulson had put it.

Now, it was very, very clear the two were night and day.

Justin Hammer was polite but firm, and not afraid to throw his weight around; if they so much as hinted at giving an inch, he took a mile. Steve hadn't realized just how little he trusted businessmen or politicians until he got going, and....

Tony wasn't like that.

Not with them, at least. Oh, he'd seemed amused by Hammer's antics, but he'd also given them all sympathetic looks when lawyers were mentioned and muttered about overkill partway through, when the first draft of the preliminary contract was outlined.

What made them so different?

#No Hero [Downward Descending]#I got an ask!#Naught replies #replies

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slothspamsstuff · 1 year ago

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Sigh, no shit, they really be calling me disgusting for seeing no problem with shipping people in a found family, who are not even related by blood lol. I'll check myself when the writers make them siblings from the same biological parents or biological parent (half-siblings), which simply means if only they're strictly related at birth. If not, it's not incest, from a logical perspective.

They have barely met or lived together from youth, they literally meet a few years later after meeting Bruce/Batman as teens/young adults so it just doesn't make sense to me if that's how a family dynamic works, it’s weird because humans are creatures of belonging, they need to feel a sense of communication and interaction in long term to actually form a familial bond, and in this case, the batfolks don’t have that kind of interactions. Imagine you're 18 something, then on one beautiful day, some 22 year-old came into your house declaring that now you two will be siblings, you don't know him, he doesn't know you either, are you supposed to act like you've been with him your entire life just because you're now siblings and not some older guy who just came into your life 20 minutes ago, whom you have no idea existed until you see him? To gain a familial bond, it really doesn't work like that, you’re in with people you don’t know until your late teens and suddenly you have to treat them like you’ve been together with them your whole life just because someone decided to adopt you out of thin air? Where is the work? Where is the built up familial bonds? I see none because! They just don’t interact with each other that much in the comics, and I started going into the fandom from the comic books, not from ao3, wfa (i don’t hate the webtoon but it should not be used as the core reference for how the batfam really act towards each other, it’s too disneyfy and idealistic, which might have or not have happened in the actual long lines of the official comics) or other fanon stuff so before I get to see them interacting like a functional family in the fandom, I’ve seen them bashing each other in the head and laughing about Bludhaven being blown up with Dick potentially being a collateral victim, that’s not how you’d react to your brother or any other family member getting caught up in an accident. And just so you know, I'm also not invalidating step-siblings who see each other as families, like-wise to adopted siblings that see their adopted siblings as a real family, or childhood friends who see their friend's family as a family, good for you guys, actually. I'm only speaking strictly in the case of the bat family so it won't bring up any other newly formed issues that I'm a family hater/pro incest advocater because I'm not. For now, check the comics from the start to the latest, so what if they're legally adopted, it's been removed then retconned to that then removed then retconned over and over again in the dc comic verse? Many writers still write them with romantic chemistries and that shouldn't be something to hate on about, people can have their own takes on fictional things. Shocking!? I know. I personally have stated above and before this over and over again that I like their dynamics to be similar to Brothers in Blood in Nightwings #2021 annual (which btw is similar to this phrase "Huynh đệ kết nghĩa" in Vietnamese, which literally means sworn brothers, which again refers to two men who are not related by blood but finding kinship in each other's company that they decide to become oath brothers - and strictly not in an incestous way but in a literal 'damn now you're my brother in arms' kind of way). Back to the main topic, many DC writers have written them together, many fandom writers have, many artists have drawn them together in a shippy kind of way, it's not a sin so it should not be associated with the violence threats that I have seen some of you so proudly posted on your wall. Like really? Proud of wanting to inflict violence on someone who doesn't share the same ideals as you? Dictatorship, I'd say.

Now, hypotheoretically speaking, do you associate yourself with a serial killer just because you watch true crimes? Do you associate yourself with a crime lord for reading under the red hood? If none of that is true to you then the same logic is applied to people who enjoy things that you don't like. They don't associate themselves as humans with the things they enjoy (if it's really incest, which the batfam is literally 90% NOT), such as the case of Cersei and Jaime Lannister in GoT, though it got better later on in the show, we also don't talk about season 8 (not the romantic, incestous part, but you get what I'm trying to say here). Grow up and think about it. But honestly, I'm just writing this so others who might come across can read and be kind to each other, I doubt you'd even read half of this lmao, you can't even read my previous post properly without accussing me of being a pedo, so I don't expect much from your reading comprehension. But you do you.

Personally, for me, I like things that are not romantically involved within the batfamily but do I be a little bitch about it and shit on anyone who has different ideas and shippings from me? No. BUT again, this is not about me, this is about being respectful to other shippings (ship and let ship) and not give a fuck or dictate what others like just to cater to your own self-rightousness. If you hate something so much but you don't own the mentality of not giving a damn and have to rage like a siren with anger issues (I'm speaking as someone with anger issues myself) at strangers on the internet, I suggest you stay off the net and get yourself checked in for therapy really, because all of this raging is screaming mental illness (and I don't mean it in a demeaning way, I mean it in an unchecked diagnosis that one needs working on kind of way aka a concerning way) to me.

Ok, here's another piece of advice before you flip your head from understanding that Tim and Cass are NOT blood siblings and therefore not logically incestous. There's a function called "block", so you could save some time instead of ranting to someone who doesn't agree with you, you could use all that time purging all the so called 'batcest' stuff from your feed lol. Maybe you will understand that we simply dont share the same mindsets or understanding of the dynamics or cultural backgrounds (and my culture gives the hard F to incest, but it's ok as long as you are not related by blood because the core values of families are so important in our culture, we don't go around calling or claiming anything we see on the internet as a real blood bonding family. Sure a family might be used here and there for one big/small close knitted community but it doesn't share the same weight of importance as a real family that includes the work and the familial bondings that everyone in said community has to claim) 🥳 try to shit on my culture without sounding like a xenophobe, I dare you. The best counterpoint you will hypotheoretically make is calling us a bunch of close minded, regressive assholes/monkeys like many have done before and it's a fact I know I'm not wrong because you won't even bother to spend 10 minutes researching on our culture the same way you don't bother researching the interactions from the source materials that are made in the west, where I think you might be from.

I would have agreed with you if you brought up Damian but I guess nah lol, also anon ask harassment is just people who find joy in annoying others cuz if I knew who you are, I’d give you snarkier comments than I do now so you’d drop that habit of yours of picking fights no one literally cares about.

So then your okay with shipping : tim and dick or bruce and jason because theyre not related by blood? Or dick and jason or bruce or jason and bruce? Like wtf man check yourself

Wow dude, you're better than this, why do you have to try to prove your point so badly by accussing me of supporting pedophilia when I have explitcitly stated on my pinned post that the one thing I hate the most is pedophilia? Did you not read my post carefully? I said Tim and Cass were close in age, and the fact that they met when they're teenagers, and even if Bruce had legally adopted Cass (Tim has his own family whatchu on about) doesn't make them blood siblings. And the comics themselves show that, I elaborated on everything you needed to know and after everything, you just need a reason to hate on someone you virtually don't know and to be honest, to accuse someone of being pro-pedo when the one thing they despise the most is pedophilia just to prove a point is kind of low. I stated what needed to be said and will not be replying to further anonymous asks you're giving me, it feels like a waste of time when you still don't understand what I want to say after that wall of text and still try to police what I don't agree with you into something as sick as pedophilia.

#if youre so aggravated on calling me disgusting without a single counterpoint #may you be at peace and be at a better place #its like talking to an angry child who refuses to listen to any reasonings #i just dont see why i should keep going with this conversation #batcest is not incest #if you dont ship bruce and damian #but tbh damian is a kid lol #cuz youre holding too much anger and hatred on fictional characters and channeled it onto real people lol #my rant is long but its the last one #and not sorry for stating my opinion #on the sexuality post I made previously #ugh people cant have their own opinions nowadays without some angry blob coming at them and that is called witch hunt #you refused to make a point when you had your chance #if I see one more ask from you and i know for a fact that its from the same person who is spending all that free time hating #on someone they dont know #i will not reply and will block your ass so its better for us #im sick of your bullshit #batfam #bruce wayne #jason todd #dick grayson #tim drake #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #damian wayne #in case its triggering cuz ugh just dont @ me on this take its annoying when its clear i said what i needed to say #hot take regarding batcest #which i don't even think it's a thing to rage on about lol #slothrants #sloth QnA

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noxiatoxia · 2 years ago

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hihi hello!!!!!.. i love talking about hikakao so true

im arospec so i honestly don't like outright romance or shippy stuff that much. However i love love love qplatonic/super affectionate platonic relationships, just really close relationships that don't really have a label to them. i think thats why i always get hyperfixated on the close best friends/twin siblings dynamic, a pair who are really close without all the official romance stuff in there, while still having a super close bond that lets them do near romantic things with each other to show their love. best dynamic Tbh

so that's kinda my favorite way of seeing hikakao. like they know some of the things they do are not considered usually acceptable but they don't really think they're in love. they just love each other with the strength of a romantic relationship, and some of the things they do (like kisses and cuddling) they started so young that they find them to be too integral in their relationship to stop, even after they find out it's 'weird'. they just love each other and want to show it. they just want to snuggle god damn it...let them be !!

i think my way of seeing them is like,, a half step down from yours. as in, mine is just slightly more platonic. but i still appreciate hikakao in all its forms,, they are just so silly i love them

ALSO idk about haruhikakao, i haven't really thought about it, but tamahikakao is so cute to me,, especially set in middle school, when the twins first come to the host club and they fall in love with tamaki just because he's so outgoing and kind and trusting, and deep down they admire him for that because they're terrified to be any of those things. and he was that way with Them, the biggest edgelords ever. he is literally so cool for that in their eyes

so they're just infatuated with tamaki, and he kinda falls for them about halfway through the year because he finally got them to come out of their shells and they're super energetic and fun, like him. and he thinks they might like him too. but kyoya tells him they're only in love with him because he's the first person to really make an effort with them, and so to tamaki it would be kinda wrong to make a move with them when they're just in love because they're traumatized. (btw i don't think it would Actually be wrong/abusive at all if they did get together at that time, i just think tamaki would think its wrong) and also kyoya points out that they might take it the wrong way that he's in love with both of them because like. your whole premise was that they could be seen as separate people. and then you tell them that you would date Both of them,, just like those girls,, don't do that you idiot you'll risk driving them off

that was really ramble-y (rambly?) but i think that because of all that, no one makes a move for a long time, and it Could be they never do. but also i think the idea of them all admitting they're all in love with each other way later, like in late highschool, is really cute.

However just early host club tamahikakao where they all just crush on each other and deny their feelings is really sweet too,,. i just think that they wouldn't actually get into a relationship until later. AND their relationship era later on is adorable. polyamory chaos. love that for them.

THIS IS GETTIGN SO LONG but i have a friend who really likes sonic.exe (like the creepypasta) and she's the reason i even started liking sonic without playing any of the games.., she dragged us to see the movie. loved every second of it though,, tails is my favorite. he is so silly

i might look into the playstation games and some pc emus Unless i can manage to convince someone to get me a nintendo hardware for my birthday. maybe

OH I GET IT ANON DW. I'm not ace but I'm on the aro spectrum and I get what ur feeling. When I was younger I outright AVOIDED romance songs/movie/books bc they pissed me off so much bc I didn't understand what the big deal about romantic love was and it was stupid to me. And to an extent I have a slight aversion still. But for me hikakao (and a lot of other ships, especially queer ones) are very different than straight ships, esp bc with Hikakao there are a Lot of factors (like... the siblings thing, for example. Makes the potential stories more interesting/less cookie cutter). But I get it man and like I said, I prefer this weird grey area with hikakao where it basically is qpp and they're just each other's most important person forever and always

I adore qpp and tbh that's what I see hikaharukao as btw. basically qpps who are ""dating"" but not really they just hang out together. Haruhi is also (grey)aro in my head so she's not really romantically involved with them. They're just a big qpp polycule it's great. Side note this is how I choose to interpret Hikaru and Haruhi in the anime. Hikaru is just suuuuper close to Haruhi as a friend he has a squish on her basically and he gets jealous like "NO THAT'S MY FRIEND" like he did with Arai. I don't think he's in love, I think he just has somebody he really cares about and he has no clue how to deal with that bc Hikaru has never handled his emotions well.

As for tamahikakao YOU GET IT!!! I love love love the idea that the twins had a huge crush on Tamaki in middle school bc he was their first real friend who didn't get sick of them/leave them when they were mean to him. He still stuck around and tried to put in the effort to tell them apart and that got to them. Esp bc their world was still so small so to them this was a HUGE deal. And Tamaki IS pretty and all.... so yeah I think they get a big ol crush on him but they have no clue what this feeling is all they know is that they're trailing after him all the time in the club room like ducklings to their mom. Tamaki at first thinks it's cute & funny and is all like "they just want to learn how to be a host from the best!" and ofc the twins' first reaction is to be edgy about it like "NO WE HATE YOU THAT'S NOT IT" but this doesn't really hurt Tamaki he just thinks it's silly mostly.

But man, if Tamaki developed feelings back, bc he really does care about these 2 and he WANTS to get to know them better so he can tell them apart etc... and then he ends up falling too. And I never considered that part you said but IT'S REALLY GOOD bc yeah confessing to them both would be a bad idea, Kyoya would def say as much. Tamaki doesn't want to hurt their feelings on accident even if he truly likes them both, so he doesn't say anything...

But as they go through the years, he does begin to tell them apart from their little quirks. The way Kaoru talks and acts is different from his brother, Hikaru is more loud and outgoing, Kaoru is more thoughtful and slow; other things he picks up on like how Kaoru will always fidget with a pencil/pen if one is in his hand while Hikaru doesn't, or how Hikaru's smile is just a tiny bit wider than Kaoru's, Kaoru's laugh is more wheezy, Hikaru's yelling is more boisterous, and it seems Hikaru's nails are cut a slight bit shorter than Kaoru's (yes he noticed this, no it's not because he tries to find an excuse to hold their hands at every conceivable moment, whatever could you be talking about)

But the thing is, Tamaki STILL loves them BOTH for their own unique traits. He likes how thoughtful and relaxed Kaoru is, he likes how stubborn and energized Hikaru is, and he doesn't want to choose one over the other. But he's scared, because he doesn't know if he'll mess up and say the wrong thing. he doesn't want to create a rift between the brothers, get into their private world, and he doesn't want them to suddenly hate Tamaki and everyone else. He doesn't know if it's safe, but he almost doesn't care, because he just wants to be with them.

I think for them it'd be one of those things that happen slowly over time. It wouldn't be a sudden deceleration of love, but a slow over-time thing of them spending more and more time together, Tamaki clearly demonstrating he knows the twins individually by personality, literally sharing a hotel room at some point during some big Club vacation and it's then Hikaru (always Hikaru, the hasty, mouth-works-faster-than-brain mf) who asks, "So, are we like, a thing now?" And well... Well, they probably are. And they're cool with that <3

Side note, I have a hanahaki hikakao au which ?? i'll never write (too lazy) but also i have no clue why I thought of it bc like I said I'm not HUGE on purely romantic hikakao + i'm not even a hanahaki enjoyer typically (dont hate it, far from it, just not my go-to) but like... i've been rotating and developing this idea in my head so if you wanna hear about it. lmk. Maybe I'll reply in the form of like. A short story. Just to get it out there.

ALSO I USED TO LIKE SONIC.EXE JKSBNBHJ I mean it used to freak me out as a kid but also I liked it.... it's a shitty story (this reading I LOVED as a kid and i still find it hilarious) but man I have so much nostalgia for it. Altho considering the like, everything in Sonic CD I wonder if sonic.exe was even necessary lol

#tamahikakao #;noxiatalks2ya

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