#(also I have VERY specific characters/fandoms in mind but I don't feel like arguing with aphobes so I'm not tagging them)

[hunter-sylvester]

Skullflower is Autistic: A Breakdown.

Buckle the fuck up.

Disclaimer: Don't take any of this too seriously.

Also all of this was written over a year ago with only minor edits. I'm just posting it now cause it's been rotting in my drafts and, like, fuck it.

I've wanted to try and make a comprehensive breakdown like this for a while just because I love these characters and very heavily interpret them all as autistic (with ADHD as well.) But this is just the perspective of one guy. And I probably overstate it but the fact that we can all have our own very personal interpretations about media is what's great about analysis & fandom.

Hunter Sylvester.

Yes I'm doing Hunter first, what do you think I am? Unbiased? Please.

Autistic Perfectionism. Hunter's autistic perfectionism is something I've mentioned before and somewhat struggle to describe satisfactorily. But to me the most obvious example is his inability to deal with the idea of Emily joining Skullfucker as a cellist. Obviously, there's the queer angle to this but I think two reasons can play a role at once. He's in love with Kevin so he doesn't want a girl that Kevin picked to be a part of their band. Additionally, I'd argue that he can't deal with the idea of having a girl cellist as their bass player because it in NO WAY fits the mental image that Hunter has in his mind of what he wanted Skullfucker to be. It doesn't match the perfect idea that he's dreamed of, that he holds onto for dear life, so he can't deal with it.

Hyperfixations. "Hunter's been into a lot of things since I've known him but he's stuck with metal longer than any of them." - Kevin. Need I say more? Well, I will anyway. The guy hyperfixates. I think the closest thing we have to a canon confirmed hyperfixation is Dungeons & Dragons. Because of what in my mind is a combination of Autism and ADHD in Hunter, they don't fully leave him. He still likes and plays D&D, but he's not as obsessed with it as he used to be when he made his dad buy him the most ridiculous game terrain that fucking lights up.

Special Interests. I think one of the easiest claims to make is that metal is a special interest for Hunter. He entrenches his entire life in it and reaches for it when a stressful situation happens to try and make himself feel more okay. (getting his hair cut off by Skip and relating his new look to Jason Newsted) It's clearly something that comforts him, having been obsessed with it ever since his mom left. Which, regardless of the specific circumstances, is a horridly stressful situation for any 12-13 year old.

Struggles with social interaction. He doesn't seem to have a lot of friends. He gets along with Robbie, Kevin (obviously) and the people he plays D&D with but that seems to be it. Especially whenever the situation gets very stressful, Hunter's mind immediately reaches for his comfort interest to try and make it through (or to lash out). He can't easily just be comfortable in a strange social situation. Or a strange situation in general.

Stims. Hunter stims by playing guitar. That's it, that's the whole point. And there's this little move:

Kevin Schlieb.

Neutrality. The way Kevin just takes Hunter and Emily as they are feels autistic to me.

Struggles with social interaction. And he clearly wants it to be easier for him. He wants to connect to people but he doesn't know how. It's not like he doesn't understand people. He does. He understands Hunter better than Hunter understands himself. "sometimes he's not so nice to people when he's uncomfortable" "You are afraid of everybody" "you treat everybody like shit and you make them hate you" But that understanding of how people think and work doesn't translate to his direct interactions with most of his peers. Maybe because he understands other neurodivergent people but not neurotypicals. The fact he does have a decent read on, at the very least, his best friend could also be indicative of the extra work Kevin has had to put in over the course of his life to try and understand people to begin with.

Directness. A lot of Kevin does feel direct to me. I suppose in a 'what you see is what you get' sort of way. He obviously has the whole protagonist thing going on which tends to end you up with pretty neutral, earnest and open characters.

Stims:

Emily Spector.

Gets overstimulated. Emily's outbursts could be attributed more to a struggle regulating her emotions. It's not a huge stretch to assume her mystery medication is a mood stabilizer. However, the idea of it being a combination of being overstimulated and then no longer being able to deal with her anger on top of the distress she's already feeling feels apt to me. This is a stretch, but, we only ever see her have outbursts at school. A nightmare environment for the stimuli sensitive. Emily is by far the character out of the main three we spend the least time with, which could easily explain my previous point away. We hardly see her out of school to begin with. But I think there can be merit in taking it as a part of the story, rather than an incidental effect of her being left by the wayside.

Black and white thinking. "So first you tell me that I should hate him, and now you want me to help him?" - Emily. No, he didn't say you should hate him, Emily. "You have every right to be mad- especially at Hunter!" - Kevin.

Directness. I mean she literally calls up Kevin to ask him if he wants to go fuck in a parking lot and more power to her. But it is very direct.

Struggles with social interaction. And apart from Skip & Co. having a particular hate-boner for Hunter, Emily might actually be the most widely ostracized for her lack of social finesse. Which would check out because society is brutally cruel to girls. Kevin is shown to have some positive interaction outside of the other two main characters, so is Hunter. And, yes, so is Emily. But it's only with the janitor of the school, who she is implied to have had previous interactions with. Having your only friend at school be the fucking janitor is not a neurotypical experience. I know I certainly got along easier with a handful of teachers than I did with my peers back when I was at school.

Whatever this is. Fam, I've BEEN there...but it's not neurotypical:

A 'little' note to end on: I want to state that I love all three of these character very dearly. I don't pretend that I don't have a favorite, but they are all amazing. There's various reasons why Metal Lords is such a comforting movie, but a big one, is that the characters act in a way that feels incredibly familiar. They act like me. They act like my autistic friends. We make weird facial expressions, we understand the world and each other through our interests. The way all of them talk feels so close to home. (The swearing is actually part of that. A lot of real people swear and over-censoring of that tends to bug me but that's kinda beside the point lmao)

[zabiume]

Hello! I just wanted to ask if you think Orihime might have been a little too complex for the audience that bleach was aimed at? (teenage boys that is). I mainly interact with the bleach fandom on tiktok (the bleach tiktok fandom is horrendous but moving on) the opinion of Orihime is kind of mixed on tiktok, there's a big portion of people who love her, but there's also a big portion of people who hate her. Whenever I get into an argument about her and ask why people think her writing is bad, they always say stuff like; ''she's too emotional/she has too many emotions'' and I'm just like ??? How does that make her a bad character?? To be fair the bleach tiktok fandom has A LOT of internalized misogyny so it's not that suprising that they hate Orihime, but again I wanna hear your opinion because I do feel like people on tiktok trow around the good/bad writing a lot without even really knowing what it means.

this is an interesting question! my joke answer is that it should be illegal to hate orihime😂, but my serious answer is that i feel like there's a difference between enjoying something as an audience member vs enjoying something as a critical reader, so if we're talking about pure enjoyment, it's perfectly okay for people to have preferences and like/hate certain characters based on those preferences. enjoying something as an audience is subjective. for instance, i really can't stand the kuroko no basket movie as a critical reader but i do enjoy it a lot as someone who was there to have a good time! i liked seeing my favorite characters again, i liked seeing them bicker and interact. sometimes stories fulfill simple needs, like "woah! that was a cool fight!" or "some dude had an incredible entrance backed with an incredible OST" and your knee jerk response is to just enjoy it. i have lots of characters that i don't really care about, so it's not surprising to me that orihime is a character lots of people don't care about. it's not a big deal.

but i think critical reading is a little more nuanced than that, especially if we're talking about what "counts" as good writing/bad writing. i don't think there's one particular way to write a Good Female Character, and i think trying to make good female characters a monolith is very bad for writing in general. trying to make any identity a monolith while writing them is obviously bad, and having different kinds of characters is a better indicator of good writing to me, which i would argue that bleach does, to a certain extent. there are lots of female characters in bleach and they're all very different from each other, and we do get to see some interiority, however rich or poor. BUT, i also think it's important to note that kubo does draw women like a freak, and a lot of the fanservice leaves a bad taste in my mouth. it's good to view a series in its totality — what it does well, what's kind of shitty, etc etc. you can acknowledge some of the great character beats for a lot of these female characters but also acknowledge that the story is not free from the author's perception of the world, and of women in particular. yes, a lot of them are interesting and have engaging storylines, but sometimes they are here to be Sexy keeping a specific kind of reader in mind (male) and orihime is not free from that kind of depiction, though she is nowhere near the only bleach character to be a "victim" of that! even ignoring the fanservice aspects of it, we could always make an argument about certain storylines and have those criticisms be valid, but it's important to do that in good-faith, which is what i mean by seeing a story in its totality!

and this is where the point you bring up comes in, because i think a lot of fans don't account for their own internalized misogyny, and how much accountability they have as an audience in writing certain characters off, especially if they're pushing goal posts that they wouldn't for male characters. yes, it's important to be critical, but you have to be critical of the series in a way that suits the genre. bleach is a shonen, which is historically a genre that appeals to the lowest common denominator of people — which means it's not going to be a transcendent, transgressive indie work of art that has radical things to say about gender and society and capitalism or whatever. if you want that, you have to pick up a manga that does that and assess how effectively or ineffectively it achieves those goals. as it stands, i think it's cruel to expect things from a story that it never even set out to do.

i know this is getting long, but my point is that when i look at orihime, i'm not holding her to the same standards that i would a character from a shoujousei or a seinen. i'm looking at her in relation to other characters in bleach, and seeing how effectively or ineffectively she fulfills her role in the story. and, if i'm allowed to be controversial: i think she's an amazing character for what her role is supposed to be! she's a love interest in a shonen, which should have doomed her from the start, but nope! she's got great relationships with characters other than ichigo, she has flaws, she has a complex belief system that is taken seriously + sometimes challenged/sometimes validated by the narrative, some of the biggest themes in bleach like the rain or the heart are explained through her, she has at least one pivotal scene in every arc (even when the plot of that arc isn't centered around her), and we get such a rich view of her inner life in every chapter centered around her. we know so much about her — from silly things like what she likes to watch and eat, to major things, like who she want to be, what she believes in, what her fears are. we get to spend so much time with her. she gets to have an antagonistic relationship with a character without actually being a full-fledged fighter. even the most bitter of orihime haters i've seen have at least acknowledged how iconic her moral clash with ulquiorra was, and the scene where he accepts defeat in front of her (he WAS accepting defeat and telling her he was wrong btw; you can't take a non-romance moment, convert it into a romantic moment, and then cry about how orihime's plotlines are only ever centered on romance. YOU are doing that, not her!), is routinely seen as one of the most iconic bleach scenes of all time. speaking of iconic scenes, orihime is in some of the most memorable bleach fights even when she's not an active participant, and a lot of times, her presence leads to a major change in how the battle is going

[literally 3/4 of those fights have a major moment with her in it, and they're voted 1st, 3rd and 4th place. yes, those were ichigo's fights but his relationship with orihime is at least hinted at or mentioned in of THREE OF THEM]

it's also worth noting just how seriously the narrative takes her feelings. we see orihime happy, angry, sad, jealous and she's allowed to be it so openly and sincerely, even at the risk of ridicule. she's allowed to cheer people up, but she doesn't exist just to do that! there are so many scenes where she's in need of comforting, where she needs reassurance, and she gets to be a scared, insecure teenager just as much as ichigo does. she's bright and vivacious, she's defiant, she's loud, she's a dreamer and a yearner, she's lonely, she's emotional, and she's so, so warm and kind and human. like, i'll be honest, so many shonen fans seem to think girls can either be tomboys or shy/submissive, but they're the ones boxing characters into those stereotypes when they don't even fit (orihime ESPECIALLY doesn't fit into either category but i've seen so many people do that)

and like, yeah, kubo can be a weirdo, but he defended her, and he considered her important enough to acknowledge her growth, even when he was running short of time. and he could have so easily made orihime's envy of rukia this catty thing of like. oooh girls are falling over themselves for ichigo, they're FIGHTING for him, but he doesn't...do that. he allows orihime to be insecure without making her the butt of a joke, and he allows her the complexity her feelings deserve. and he gave rukia enough respect to have orihime want to be her friend, even as she navigated her complicated feelings about her.

and these are all OUTSIDE of her role as a love interest. as a love interest, she's basically perfect. she has meaningful and thematic parallels with ichigo, she has so many heartfelt moments with him, her confession is almost universally loved by normal people, and ichigo is so kind to her that you never feel like she picked someone who doesn't value her or respect her. these are definitely bare minimum things, but again, i'm judging it by shonen standards, and by shonen standards, she is very, very lucky. i can work with this much material, this is good enough for me, but if people's standards are higher then maybe it's not hitting for them idk! maybe their expectations for good writing were different! at the end of the day, i think it's a good thing for characters to be widely discussed because it just means there's a lot to talk about, and that's always a good thing, but let me just plug my favorite tweet to summarize my thoughts on the matter

[aworld-inpink]

just a quick warning, I do read most of the cast as trans in some way, especially the siblings, so if you get easily triggered by stuff like that, just don't interact please 😸

please be respectful of the space I have curated ★

Trans Obey Me! Headcanons ("brothers" edition)

Lucifer:

transmasc Luci genuinely brings me so much joy

like, the idea of him being the oldest and first to come out?

im in love

Lucifer is one of the more cut and dry ones to me

but I do love people who draw/write him as transfem, theyre the biggest troopers ever

Luci definitely acts as the main support for a lot of the others

especially when it comes to appointments for hormones

he/him, FtM

Mammon:

i am so insanely obsessed with this man

me and him are t4t trust

nah, but for realz

trans guy Mammon with the COOLEST top surgery scars, you will not catch them lacking

probably got a sick ass tattoo to give them a cool shape too

similar to the white on his chest in his demon design

off topic, but chubby Mammon actually makes me 🤤

need to be squished between his thighs yesterday bro

jjhjhjhjh they're so handsome look at that little guy go

i feel like he would say his pronouns are he/him but secretly wouldn't mind they/them also

he just feels like he would be seen as less of a guy

i love them

he/they, FtM (and so devastatingly bisexual (affectionate))

Levi:

everybody say thank you to Levi for inventing being transgender

she ..... she's my everything

if Mammons my boyfriend she's my wife bro

(Mammons my favourite, Levi just has more whimsy)

gamer girl

i NEED her bathwater gang you don't understand ......

i made a whole post about transfem Levi, you should check it out ;)

tho trans guy Levi also has a special place in my heart and my bed (he's just like me fr)

do you wanna know the good that flat girl Levi would do for the ecosystem??

it would end climate change

she/her, MtF, Ruri chan was her trans awakening (half joking (not really))

Satan:

oh Satan the demon that you are

yknow they do say that Satan invented the gays

this NERD

book lover? likes cats? BLONDE?

how much more she/he/they can you get bro

demon born out of hatred, aged from transgenderism

that's all I'm saying

do you think Satan would feel the need to tie himself down to one specific gender identity?

fool.

Satan is everything and Satan is nothing

she/he/they, shrugs (genderfluid would be most accurate, but they're mostly unlabeled)

Asmo:

see the fandom argues about Asmo all the time

"is it ethical to headcanon them as trans just cause they're feminine?"

well, no, not necessarily, but that's besides the point

Asmo's similar to Satan in the way of not being tied to one specific gender or expression

but I feel like she's much more aligned to being a guy than Satan is

like, he doesn't mind other pronouns and sometimes enjoys them

but I think she's bigender with a heavy masc lean

expression wise he's more fem, but gender wise she's more masc

she/him, bigender and so full of love

Beel:

him.

i. i love him so much.

he's genuinely one of the sweetest characters in the game, and someone I would genuinely like irl

anyways however

I feel like this one is very stereotypical of me

cause this is the same headcanon as most of the trans part of the fandom

but Beel is so very trans man

like, didn't have top surgery just exercised to turn his boobs into pecs typa trans man

he's so powerful

and so lovely

and so, so transgender

he/him, FtM

Belphie:

similar to Levi, I do actually have a separate post just about Belphie

so if you want a less brief headcanon, check it out

anyways

Beel and Belphie are both trans to me, even in scenarios when I don't see the others as such

but my thing about Belphie is massively projection and based off my own identity

I think Belphie is also trans, but doesn't pass, doesn't want surgery, and doesn't necessarily want testosterone

like, I think he would feel a bit isolated from his siblings, especially Beel sometimes, since they're all relatively passing

but Beel would reassure him and they would cuddle on bad dysphoria days together, tons of snacks piled onto the bed for Beel and movies on autoplay for background noise :)

he/him, nonbinary

[moralesmilesanhour]

Every time i think about atsv and its themes, my mind keeps going back to the scene with Miles and his parents in that college counselor’s office, and what its purpose is.

It establishes the strain that being Spider-Man has put on their relationship, yes - it also establishes that Miles feels trapped and limited, yes - but a lot of fandom discussion overlooks the important parallel that that scene sets in motion between racism in academia and Miles' rejection from Spider Society.

By now, everyone has already figured out that the issue with the 'Canon Event' theory is that it assumes that trauma - specifically experiencing the "right" traumatic events - is what makes a Spider-Man, and it is wrong for Miles to be required to accept this. It isn't enough that he had his uncle die, his father must die also because then he will have sacrificed "enough" to keep the canon intact. No one questions why arbitrary sacrifice is required at all.

The concept of the personal statement being required for college applications, I would like to argue, has the exact same issue.

Miles even says so in the beginning of the movie: "Having 'a story' in the first place sounds gross" (notice how Miles vocally critiques elite academia contantly and has been from the get-go. He is not an apolitical character like some might portray him to be).

It is not enough that Miles is an exceptional student with a variety of interests (art and science), he must have the appropriate traumatic "story" for white academic institutions to find him interesting enough as an applicant, even if the story they want him to tell is not actually his story (no, he is not from a "struggling immigrant family". They own an apartment floor and PR is in the United States). Just like the "Canon events" that Miguel describes are not Miles' story, and Miles does not want them to be because it requires the preventable deaths of innocent people.

In a similar way that has been touched upon more in wider fandom, Rio gives Miles a speech telling him not to let the people in these overwhelmingly-white spaces that he will be entering tell him that he doesn't belong. That speech, as we all know, ends up being a direct parallel to the way Spider Society treats him: he is simultaneously a charity case and a threat just by his mere presence. His very existence is disruptive to the canon: The spider wasn't "supposed" to bite him, he just got lucky. There is a reason why the visual of the ball with Miles' lottery number is constantly paired with the number on the spider that bit him; they are one and the same.

(Side note: this is also what makes Hobie's function as a character so interesting - The idea that you can just simply quit. You do not HAVE to be in these privileged spaces if they don't have your best interests in mind. You don't have to prove yourself to these people to be who you are. But that's a post for another day)

The reason I've been thinking about all this is because I feel like no one really touches upon why Miles' character exists. Like, on a thematic level. Yes, he's there to show that "anyone can wear the mask", but there's a lack of specificity in that statement that I wanted to address with this post.

Miles is a love letter to every black kid that's been told that they're only in the spaces they're in because they "got lucky". He's for every black kid that's ever looked at a college app and been told that they have to take their trauma and put it on display for some white admissions officer to shed a tear over. He's there to argue that you don't have to bend towards any of society's attempts to make a spectacle or a serviceable machine out of you, and that you can just be.

TL;DR: it was never just about the mask MWAH 🫶🏾

[lostcauses-noregrets]

Why is the answer always "Levi said this Levi did this" whenever one asks about the signs of Eruri in canon? Levi's side is pretty clear, but every time I talk to an Eruri and I ask "but why do you think Erwin loved Levi" the answer is very long but it's mostly empty and just "I am sure he did" or "but Levi loved him so Eruri is canon". Sorry this isn't a "hehehe your ship is one sided it's not canon" type of question. It's more of a writing-wise question, since you are a writer yourself I thought you'd give the best answer to this.

I am wondering, is this because of lack of Erwin's pov in aot manga or anime? I know Erwin is important and plays an important role and story revolves around him in s3 p2 and all that but when you look at the bigger picture he's mostly just there. He's in the story but you don't see his pov. We don't get to see the inside of his head until the end. Is this why "does Erwin love Levi" question is a hot topic in aot fandom always? Or are there any side stories like smartpass aus that suggest Erwin had feelings for Levi? I'm sorry I don't know those very well I only know the manga and the anime.

Lastly, I am sure you answered this before but my question is very specific, do you actually believe it was mutual? After all it's fiction and you don't need their love to be mutual to ship them. People ship characters who barely interact. It's what fandom is and that's totally normal and valid. I guess I am wondering if you ever doubted, th ship or even yourself which I do a lot (in a "oh I love this so much and I read so much fics I made myself believe" way) Thanks I hope this doesn't sound rude or offensive, my English isn't very good so if I sound rude that must be it it's not my intention :)

Ooof there’s  a lot of different questions here but I think they boil down to the following: 

Are Erwin and Levi’s feelings for each other mutual? / Does Erwin reciprocate Levi’s feelings?

Why do people question Erwin’s relationship to Levi? 

Do I personally believe their relationship was mutual, and have ever “doubted the ship”?

I’ve answered the first question many, many times over the years. You can read all my various answers here.  In short I do think that Erwin reciprocated Levi’s feelings and I think the evidence is there in the manga, the official guidebooks, the Smartpass stories, and the side content for anyone who cares to see it. I’m not going to list all the side content here, but there’s a very old post by @erbeansandravioli that links to a lot of it: Eruri receipts.

As to why people question Erwin’s relationship to Levi, well that’s an interesting one.  Some people clearly just don’t get Erwin’s character (see the previous ask I just answered), they don’t understand his role in the plot or the significance of his relationship to Levi.  For example I’ve seen people arguing passionately that Levi’s vow had nothing to do with Erwin, which is just mind boggling to me. It’s certainly true that Erwin is a much harder character to read than Levi who very much wears his heart on his sleeve.  Erwin is more reserved, and holds his cards closer to his chest.  However the fact that Levi is the only one who he reveals his true self to is significant. Daisuke Ono put it beautifully when he said in an interview that the amplitude of Erwin’s feelings is so great that it can be hard to see.  

It could also be that some, perhaps younger, readers just don’t recognise their relationship for what it is. It’s certainly not a typical shounen romance, but it is a deeply believable adult relationship; one that is based on mutual trust, respect and understanding. This is from a previous ask I answered on the subject:

It frustrates me enormously when people deny their canon relationship, despite Yams being at paints to explain it repeatedly in the guidebooks. I want to shake them and ask what the hell they think a relationship looks like when you’re an exhausted 30 + year old war veteran who has spent their entire life fighting for survival.  It looks like this; finding someone who you can trust with your life. If you were to ask me what characterizes a successful adult relationship I would say it’s exactly this; mutual trust, respect and understanding, and when push comes to shove, the willingness to do everything in your power to help the person you hold most dear, even if that means letting them go. 

And as to whether I’ve ever doubted the ship, the answer to that would be no, never.  Sure we’ve never seen them swear undying love in canon (though some would argue with that and point to Erwin’s "Arigatō Levi".) I wrote this in response to an ask about Eruri canonicity: 

Do you mean that you don’t believe they’re canon because we never see them kiss? Because they never marry?  Because the main focus of the story isn’t romance?  All those things are true, but in my opinion, they’re also not the only things that make a relationship canon.  Particularly when that relationship is between two war-weary 30 year old men who have been fighting for survival almost their entire lives. The irony is that, in some ways, Erwin and Levi’s relationship is actually quite conventional. They really do behave a bit like an old married couple.  They have a long standing relationship that has matured over many years, they have their own weird sense of humour, they’re not afraid to challenge each other, but they care about one another deeply, and they also trust each other unconditionally.  That’s all the canon evidence I need tbh.

Having said that, you are absolutely right that you don’t need any canon evidence to ship a couple.  Hell, I’ve had great fun written Hanji and Petra as a side ship and I don’t think they ever even interacted in canon.  In Erwin and Levi’s case though there is more than enough evidence in canon to attest to the significance of their relationship. 

Hope this answers your questions.

[positivelybeastly]

I'm just curious what the Beast and Abigail Brand relationship is like? (I haven't really read any of the x men comics until now.)

Ouaghhhhh . . . okay, so.

Full disclosure, I am a late comer to the truth of Wonderbeast, and, in fairness, I have an excuse! My trajectory for getting into Beast was reading him in X-Treme X-Men and New X-Men in the early 00s, then falling out of comics for a good long while until X-Men: First Class got me back in. When I got back home from watching the movie, the very first thing I did was go on Amazon, and type in 'X-Men comics.'

This was the very first result I got.

That is my legit Amazon purchase history right there, by the way. December 2011, verified, right there for you.

I bought the first volume, consumed it voraciously, then bought the other three volumes rapid fire. I still have them.

And this is how the Beast/Brand pipeline begins.

When we meet Hank in Astonishing X-Men, he's at a very rough place in his life, still. His best friend, Jean Grey, has recently died, he's still struggling with his anxieties and insecurities over his secondary mutation, still reeling from the psychic attack by Cassandra Nova, and, as if to rub salt in the wound, he's presented with the simplest solution to at least most of his problems.

A cure.

Because let's be real here - we can call it a mutant gift all we want, but some people have it worse than others. Beak, Glob Herman, Maggott, Dummy, Forget-Me-Not, Beast - these people have powers that suck exponentially more than Storm or Cyclops or Emma Frost. They just do. And I am well aware of the fact that this is a nuanced discussion, that Scott has to wear his glasses/visor, and that Ororo has to maintain control over her emotions so that she doesn't wreck the weather systems, I get that. I know that.

But.

It always hits me, the fact that Logan cannot respond to Hank's point specifically. He cannot argue that Hank's X-gene specifically makes him dangerous, because to do so would be fucking insulting - all he can do is blow it out to a macro level, and make it about Hank's status as an X-Man, about the fact that an X-Man admitting that some mutants just want to be cured and all that implies would be a massive blow to everything they represent.

And that is a point, one that has to be weighed up, but you can't act like this isn't literally dehumanising for Hank. Logan literally says he's not a human being, he's an X-Man - his duty outweighs his right to peace of mind and humanity.

Also, no, I don't care that Hank 'did this to himself.' Hank turned himself blue and furry, yes, and he made his peace with that.

But he did NOT choose to mutate into a feline monster with less fingers, new predatory instincts, less humanity. This is a nuance that is almost always lost in this conversation - Sage made this choice for him, and that will always colour this stage of Hank's life. It's very well likely that he might've chosen to go ahead with the mutation anyway, to save his life, but it doesn't matter because he never got the chance.

Treating Hank's different mutations as broadly the same, despite the fact that they are eminently different and they make him feel differently, is one of the many nuances that is often lost by both writers and the fandom at large, and it makes him a less complex character as a result. It is important that classic Hank would not have chosen to cure himself, but feline Hank would. That is important.

This probably seems like I'm getting off track, but I promise you I'm not. This is all vital context for this relationship.

So, the cure is destroyed, although Hank has one sample of it sitting in his lab by the end of the story.

Now, by this point, Abigail Brand has entered the story. She is, to put it bluntly, an asshole - Nick Fury with less warmth.

It's also vitally important that you know that Hank and Abigail's literal first interaction is him making fun of her. I'm not kidding.

So, we fast forward a little bit, and Cassandra Nova comes back, and. Well.

Hank's literal stated worse fear. Thanks for the second dose of trauma, Nova! Really love that!

This is also very important to their relationship. Swear down. Hank is, unfortunately, an unwilling cannibal, and it's all continuing his increasing alienation and isolation and dehumanisation. For someone who is, I would say, best characterised as a humanist, to become, if you'll forgive the ghoulish joke, a humanitarian, is ego shattering.

Anyway, Hank and Abigail begin to interact more and more as S.W.O.R.D forcibly recruits the X-Men to help them with their problems.

And thus, a. Tension, begins to develop.

Anyway, remember how I said cannibalism would be important?

And things continue to roll along . . .

Oh my . . .

Ouuaughhhhh . . . I love heart on his sleeve Hank . . .

So, what is this all building to? Well . . .

And there it is.

Abigail Brand is a massive monsterfucker, confirmed. Love her for that.

Now, this exchange kinda reads differently now, after all the mud that Hank's been dragged through since the mid-00s, especially with X-Force and everything, but at this point in continuity, Hank was still very much one of the most moral, ethical, well regarded heroes in the entire Marvel Universe. He would often be given maxed out stats for conscience and wisdom in expanded material, people would repeatedly state that he didn't have it in him to kill, that he could be trusted to do the right thing - he was a moral counterweight.

And the fact that Abigail wants him on her side because of that? To be her professional bullshit caller? To bring her up to snuff? That speaks a lot about her, honestly. She is not just a thug. She feels. She cares. She has a sense of right and wrong, it's just distorted sometimes by the wider scale of dealing with intergalactic politics and all the attendant bullshit that goes along with them - and Hank gives her perspective. He grounds her.

And to Hank, this is a fucking brand new epoch. He's just coming off a relationship with Trish Tilby where she explicitly rejected him because his form repulsed and scared and unsettled her - and now, this woman wants him because his form is familiar to her. Because it conforms to her sense of attractive. It gives him an all new perspective. He looks like her people. What must that feel like to Hank?

Suddenly, it isn't, I'm a monster to my fellow humans, it's, to the right people, I look beautiful.

(Well, Abigail would likely not use the word beautiful, but.)

That is immensely attractive! And let's be real here - this is all kinda mercenary, to begin with. Abigail wants to fuck Hank because he's hot, and she wants to work with him because she's trying to be a better person but can't trust herself to do it properly; Hank wants to fuck Abigail because he's lonely and isolated and wants to feel wanted, and he wants to work with her because it's a chance to be a contrarian full time!!! What more could he goddamn want?! Feelings have not yet begun to enter the equation.

But that's fine, because this is fun.

And we can let things cook . . .

And it's clear that it takes a little bit. Feelings are entering the equation, but it's not impossible for things to take a backslide here and there. They don't quite completely trust each other yet. They're cute together! But they're still brittle at this stage.

Things could still break apart - except, Abigail does have a heart.

Look at that smug motherfucker.

What really seals it for me is this, though, from a later arc of Astonishing X-Men.

For someone like Abigail Brand, for whom work is everything, there is no clearer way to say 'I love you' than this. She wanted to protect Hank from the consequences of his actions. She wanted to protect him from the perversion of his work, done with good intentions but perverted for ill. She worked, for months, off the books, on things that weren't her jurisdiction, because of Hank.

There's so much that she's not saying here, but this is the EXACT SAME WOMAN who, if you scroll up, just panels ago, was saying there was NO-ONE she would not sacrifice, no enemy she would not sleep with, if it meant that Earth was safe.

The Earth . . . and Hank, apparently.

That is huge.

Also, they kinda have a kid together? Sort of?

That's Broo, Hank's protege. He happens to be around because of a whole adventure where Hank pulled the X-Men into a Brood related nightmare that ended up producing a mutant Brood with compassion and emotions and empathy.

A Brood related nightmare where Abigail was in danger. And why was she in danger?

Because she was being heroic, huh?

And then there's this . . .

Now, this is from Siege (2015), part of Battleworld, so it isn't quite 616 canon, but it's the exact same writer as S.W.O.R.D, so I have absolutely no hesitation in saying that this is exactly how Abby feels about Hank in 616 as well.

"After McCoy, she will never let herself love anything."

Ouauuhhghhhhh . . . they complete each other, quite frankly. He's the moral counterweight to her pragmatic solutions. She's the realist that reminds the optimist that the world isn't sunshine and daisies all the time. He's the bright, colourful, bounding genius, she's the insanely deadly workaholic who hates you. Enemies to lovers.

This is crack to me, friends. This is crack cocaine.

Also, I reject the idea that they're on-again, off-again. These two were locked in from S.W.O.R.D onward, and I refuse to hear otherwise.

It's incredibly clear to me that the X-Men never understood this relationship, just like how they never really understood what makes Hank tick in general, and so they just make assumptions based on what they think they know, because we're literally never shown these two in the middle of one of their supposed arguments. Every time they're on panel together, they're flirting and backing each other up, consistently, every time. Even during X-Force, Abigail is pretty much the only person that Beast treats with respect, and love, and care. They hug, which is unheard of for that version of the character.

Well. There is one other character evil Beast treats with care.

Man, X-Force #50 was all kinds of gay . . .

Anyway. If it weren't for Simon, Beast/Brand would absolutely be Hank's One True Pairing. As it is?

Hank has two paws. He can hold two hands.

[peonycats]

So I was recently informed that my latest post caused someone to accuse me of posting Chinese imperialism apologia, specifically for my tag comment that says: "If you accuse me of being hypocritical because I'm so anal about tying the nations to their states when it comes to the West but shy away when it comes to China, 1) you clearly don't know how Sinophobia works and 2) I ain't no coward."

Now, it may perplex you how people can accuse me of being a CCP apologist for a post where I called China a slut and specifically noted China's poor treatment of Uyghurs, but unfortunately, it's not the first time I've received accusations of being pro-CCP despite no supporting evidence.

I know I don't talk a lot about my personal life or internal goings-on on this blog, but I want to say this- I'm not completely unaffected by these frequent accusations. It hurts to see me being reduced to my Chineseness. My Chineseness being weaponized to discredit me as a wumao feels incredibly dehumanizing, and it hurts even more to see people believe those accusations. 

To give you my background, I was raised in a fairly nationalist household; my grandfather was born as an illiterate peasant and consequently came to hold very pro-Mao beliefs. From an early age, I often came to verbal blows with my parents (and my extended family) over these beliefs and argued frequently with them over Taiwan, Tibet's annexation, and China's policies towards minorities. I remember representing Kazakhstan for Model United Nations and was assigned to write a paper on the Kazakh reaction towards China’s unlawful detention of Uyghurs. Just mentioning this simple fact to my parents sparked a heated “debate” where they accused me of being brainwashed by Western propaganda, and that I was incapable of understanding China’s actions because I was born in the US.

I haven’t brought up any of this because I’m a private person by nature, and I felt that my posts should speak for themselves about my political beliefs. And yet, I find myself in the position of where I need to bring this up in order to defend myself from accusations of supporting Chinese imperialism, for disagreeing with another person, or calling something sinophobic/promoting sinophobia.

Sinophobia overlaps with other forms of racism, especially anti-Asian racism when other Asians are mistaken to be Chinese. However, we have to recognize that the specificity of China itself in "mistaken to be Chinese" is also what distinguishes Sinophobia from the more general anti-Asian racism. It indicates a designation of China as a prominent actor on the world stage, and most importantly- an inherently antagonistic one. The symbolism of China being inherently antagonistic is what justifies the conflation of Chinese people with the Chinese state; if China is by nature antagonistic then Chinese people must subsequently be extensions of the Chinese government, and every action they do must be politicized.

What are the implications when the fandom gives the okay to depictions of America hanging out with countries that the actual USA has fraught history with, but as soon as China does the same, questions and concerns arise about “making light” of China’s irl actions? That China can’t be disassociated with his state the same way other imperialist powers are in the fandom?

Bear in mind, I am saying this as someone who personally interprets all the nations as inherently political entities. China is no exception to this- my most recent post was parodying an Onion article about Biden and Xi, where Alfred and Yao literally take on the roles of their heads of state. I am the last person who shies away from politicizing all the nations. 

Rather, I am pointing out how China is being exceptionalized from wider fandom trends of depoliticizing the characters; I find this pattern troubling, as over-politicizing a Western nation (like America) does not have the same implications as over-politicizing China. 

The latter reflects dangerous trends on how Chinese people, especially Chinese communities abroad, are perceived, how we’re expected to answer for and answer to the Chinese government and its actions, and how, at best, we’re dismissed as being simply brainwashed, and how at worst, we’re seen as enemies of the populace, threats to national integrity. When we are seen to be “acting out of line,” we are viewed as perpetual outsiders, agents of a foreign regime. The same judgment is not levied towards white Americans, even those who live in America, vote in America, and benefit from American imperialism. 

I witnessed the dramatic rise in anti-Asian hate crimes and Sinophobic rhetoric during the COVID-19 pandemic: I was living in Atlanta during the 2020 spa shootings and I didn’t leave my dorm room for a week afterward. I worried over my mother, who every week, went to shop at local Chinese grocery stores in the area. I heard people spread conspiracy theories about how the virus was engineered by the Chinese government and spread by Chinese in the West as part of some grand conspiracy to ensure Chinese global dominance. All of this, led me to become conscious (in a way I hadn’t been before) of how conflating Chinese people with the Chinese government was frequently employed by bigots to mask their violent prejudice under the guise of “being anti-CCP.”

As a result, being Chinese diaspora is an emotionally fraught experience. Not only are we under constant scrutiny by others, but Chinese Mainlander diaspora specifically like myself face rejection when we choose to go against our families’ beliefs. But despite that, despite me being born and raised in the United States and living with this sort of bigotry all my life, it still cuts me deeply to see someone so quickly accuse me of supporting Chinese imperialist actions, despite me never posting in favor of the CCP in the past, simply because I pointed out how sinophobia manifests. It cuts even deeper to see people, people I know, agree with that assessment, and how I have to go out and publicly reveal details of my personal life to try and exonerate myself. 

It really does hurt.

[creatingblackcharacters2]

FAQs!

I go by Ice, she/her pronouns 💕. In case you had any of these questions, here you go:

1. "Why'd you make this page?"

I want to make the creation space- fandom to professional- more inclusive for people that look like me.

It is very disheartening when you really like something, and you see that oh! It's going to include a Black character! And then you get that character and... They're subpar. Especially in comparison to the usually white characters that have so much thought put into them. You accept them because you REALLY want that rep, but... We deserve to wholeheartedly accept our characters too, no ehhs about it.

I wanted to challenge myself, using my amateur art skills and my teaching skills, to convey to creators how that makes us feel, and little things they can do to more intentionally create their Black characters. There's more to us than adding to a diversity quota.

2. "So you aren't even a professional?"

I got 28 years of being a Black person on my resume 🤣 jokes aside, I am a self teaching artist. It's only been about a year and a half for me. My more specific goal here is to use my skills to convey a perspective change towards Blackness, not necessarily a "how to do". If you want to learn the specific how-to's of drawing Black characters, there are Black artists all over Tumblr and the web that can show you! I will always actively encourage you to go check them out and support them, it's a great way to learn as well as to support our community!

3. "But if you're not a professional, why should I trust you?"

Well, again, because I don't have to be a professional to recognize when supposedly Black characters... Don't look like me 😅. Or, in writing, don't have any thought about me behind them. I could show my 88 year old Grandma some art and she'd recognize the issues.

But also, I personally believe that if you start from the foundations thinking about intentionally creating your Black characters, it'll make it much easier for you moving into the future. I am holding my hand out as a Black peer to HELP YOU! There are professional video games and art pieces and projects out there with poorly designed Black characters. The concept clearly needs to be introduced to the people somewhere before a million dollar project is release 🤣 But I can't talk to the people at the AAA studios. I can talk to you!

4. "I don't think race matters/should matter."

Alas, it does, everything we do is affected by our beliefs unconsciously or not- but I'm not going to waste my time and argue with you. This blog isn't for you 🤷🏾‍♀️ this blog is for those who want to take that first step to be better, both as creators and as people. 👍🏾

5. "Do you support AI?"

Not in the arts. Learn how to create, it's very fulfilling.

6. "Do you answer asks?"

I do! However, this is a lesson based page, more than an ask based page. If I think your ask can be answered by one of my lessons, I'll refer you to that lesson. If it's an ask that's relevant to something coming up, I will answer it, but you will find more detail in the lesson coming up! I'm only one person doing this, and I can't answer every singular scenario. Also, keep in mind, if you ask me my opinion on something, I will be fair, but honest!

7. Will you be turning on anons?

Okay: right now, we've earned Anon Office Hours Wednesday 12:30pm thru Friday 6:30pm EST!

Most of this is due to the nature of what I'm discussing. Historically, these topics (and how race is relevant) upset some people, and it can get unsafe. Personally, I have no intention of allowing racists, or those who will take my advice in bad faith, to hide their faces. If you want to hate me, speak with your chest 😤👍🏾

The other part is that it is not a bad thing to ask questions! I did create this blog to be a learning opportunity. So long as you are kind to me and send me asks in good faith, I will be kind to you and reply in good faith. I'm also pretty sure I have the option to answer privately, so if you don't want your question posted publicly, You can say that.

If I get more questions, I'll update this!

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Is it just me or has the card illustrations (specifically the groovy) been kinda bad lately? Like don't get me wrong most of the pre groovy are absolute bangers, but the groovies? Not so much. But lately there has been an obvious decrease in quality with anatomy, and even 😐 a whitewashing problem.

Take Lilia's dorm groovy for example— the piece is gorgeous, but whenever I zoom into his face the way they draw his face looks so off.

As for the whitewashing issue, I've noticed that Leona's beastly garb groovy had him very ashy looking (but some may argue that it's just the lighting casted on him)

Right now though the one that's been bothering me the most is the obvious whitwashing on Kalim's tsum groovy. We really can't argue that it's a lighting issue there, cause Jamil's firework card had a similar setting and he didn't look that light.

Personally, I think TWST’s Groovy illustrations have always been hit or miss since the beginning. I have similar issues with the faces in Lilia and Leona’s Dorm Uniform Groovies, and the anatomy seemed slightly off in a few others. I can’t find the original post anymore (I think OP didn’t tag it??), but I clearly recall an artist having spoken about how the pose in Epel’s initial Dorm Uniform art looked weird; they included drawings of how Epel’s spine and limbs looked vs how they should look to illustrate what they meant. Those are just a few examples of then and now though, and we have to keep in mind that if we include ALL available cards then the funky faces and weird posing/proportions only make up a very small percentage of what’s out there.

The more important issue at the moment is the coloring choices that were made for a few recent SSR event Groovies: Beastly Garb Leona and Tsumsted Kalim. They are pictured below with a few other card illustrations I pulled that have similar lighting (or as similar as I could find). You’ll notice (especially for Tsumsted Kalim’s Groovy) that the characters’ skin colors are much lighter than they should be.

Now I’ll be honest here 💦 I actually can’t tell (even when eyedropping the colors to compare; I don't even know if eyedropping is an accurate way to compare colors since the lighting and environment in every illustration is never EXACTLY the same) if Leona’s Beastly Garb Groovy is just the strong sunlight or if it has been whitewashed. I don’t have enough knowledge and/or experience with color theory and in real life to know for certain. However, as the Anon has said, that same argument cannot be made for the Scarabia duo. It’s particularly bad for Tsumsted Kalim because Yasmina Silk Jamil also had fireworks in the background, and his skin color is fine there. Sometimes artists purposefully use an altered color palate to achieve a different feeling in their pieces (for example, pastel colors for a soft, soothing look). I don’t think that was the case for Tsumsted Kalim because everything else in the Groovy art looks pretty true to color for the lighting (but again, I'm not an expert in coloring so I could be wrong). When taken in conjunction with Leona’s Beastly Garb… it could indicate a troubling pattern.

There’s been a lot of speculation going around for why this has happened, chief among that speculation being the TWST team has likely hired new staff and/or colorists (and Japan, being Japan, is pretty homogenous; it may be difficult to find artists with an understanding of how to color and shade darker skin tones). Again, these are just guesses circulating in the fandom. Nothing is confirmed, and nor does this excuse what has happened.

This has, very understandably, caused a lot of hurt and upset in the TWST fandom and community. So now the question is…

What can we do about it?

You can communicate your feelings to the TWST team! They have a form to collect thoughts and opinions from the playerbase, which can be accessed here.

PLEASE NOTE:

Be polite and professional. Nothing good comes out of anger, especially if the anger is directed at others; if you are rude and/or curse at the staff, they will be much less likely to hear you out.

Communicate in Japanese. The staff you are sending your complaint to are Japanese, and the game itself is Japanese (Beastly Garb Leona and Tsumsted Kalim are not yet out in the EN server, which is staffed by totally different people).

If you don’t know how to write in Japanese, this Twitter user has created polite templates to communicate our concerns with the whitewashing. (Their whole thread is great; please reference it if you need additional assistance!!) I would not recommend adding extra text, especially if you would be relying on a translation program to do so. Speaking in broken Japanese can be perceived as rude and will only detract from your message.

A similar situation to this occurred during the initial run of Fairy Gala; TWST had used “exotic” in its text, and after receiving an influx of feedback from the players, the devs went in and changed the dialogue to no longer use the term. It’s possible to make the change we want to see a reality if we respectfully make our thoughts known.

[velvetvexations]

I'm genuinely trying to not just be constantly negative and starting shit and arguing with people. I feel like even the people I mostly agree with are getting put off by it if they haven't already. I'm very self-conscious about my opinions and how much I talk on a given subject, and I know I do have issues that make my expressed opinions more pointed than necessary.

But like, me jokingly comparing the Bad Kids to the protagonists of 8-Bit Theater is interesting, because I love 8-Bit Theater to death, it's an extremely important work to me, it hurts a lot that I didn't hear about the scriptbook Kickstarter until it was over and I'll always be looking for a pre-owned copy for the rest of my life.

Like, I think the issue isn't that I have a problem with the Bad Kids acting so awfully. That's okay, especially in a comedy. Comedic sociopathy is a totally fine trope and I enjoy it on a regular basis. The issue that gets me is that it's such a hard counter to not only D20's usual tone, but also the way the DM, the players, the narrative itself, and most of all the fandom treat them and their actions.

That's why I soured on Kristen specifically so hard and so fast, because before JY I just thought she was like, A Lot, but not really a big deal and had some good, solid moments in SY (I did not like FY in general for completely unrelated reasons, sadly). But with JY, it was like, right out the gate she's ignoring Cassandra literally half to death, and I wonder if that would have seriously bothered me as much as it did if the fandom wasn't determined to completely excuse her for it in spite of the fact that it was clearly meant to be a personal character flaw and not just "unfortunately mental illness is happening to her".

Even then I was like, hey, I watched those promo videos, this is obviously something that's been planned ahead and will be dealt with. I'm very far from the first person to point out that we're now entering the season finale and chaos has not yet stopped being cute. Partially that in particular may have been hamstrung by the dice rebellion in the mall fight, with the original plan having been for Cassandra to not get separated from Kristen so fast and subsequently unable to have them actively work on their relationship and Kristen's commitment to her. Kristen running for president also likely threw a monkey wrench into decutifying chaos, because there was never any chance of Ally going about that by having Kristen put on a slick suit and say "I need to take this seriously and research school governance and formulate a policy I'll elaborate on in a debate with Kipperlilly". The race for president could only possibly be a bit the second it went to her instead of Riz, not because I don't think Ally could handle that kinna plot if they set their mind to it, Margret Encino would have killed it just as good as Riz, but because it's simply so far from who Kristen Applebees is as a character.

So anyway, I sat there watching this season waiting for Kristen to grow up because I had faith that was going to happen. But lest you think I just hate Kristen and possibly also Ally, these last few weeks they've been the least of the issue.

As hilarious as it was I don't understand how in the good Lord's name we're supposed to care about Oisin "making Adaine think she liked him" by acting a little flustered around her when Fig literally started catfishing Ruben on the first day of school ages before they had any in-character reasons to suspect the Rat Grinders of anything, all so she could...no, really, why the fuck did she do that? What was the impetus for that decision? I cannot emphasize enough how little motivation is given for this course of action:

There is nothing to it except that Emily correctly pegged he'd be an antagonist later. It's like the detectives on Law & Order arresting someone because they recognized the special guest star.

And like, other people, I get it, other people who don't like the direction JY has taken can shrug it off more easily than I can, there are a million reasons to not treat this like the end of the world, but unfortunately my autism gets me stuck on shit and I just cannot reconcile things like this. I cannot take the show seriously and care about the protagonists as people and share joy in their triumphs and sorrow in their failures and ignore something as blatantly breaking the logic as stuff like this.

I'll grant you, okay, Adaine was understandably hurt but neither the Bad Kids nor the Intrepid Heroes were really like "oh now we have to really fucking ruin Oisin for being the worst person alive". The fandom treated it like he Frozen'd her but fandoms are dumb and should not dictate as much of my opinion as they do, I simply cannot fathom the kind of person who'll cry over the deep and traumatic emotional damage Oisin caused Adaine with his missed beer pong shots but doesn't think Fig should be in jail.

That's also not the end of it, though. I could keep going on just about Fig specifically and the fact that she is at least sex crimes-adjacent, not to mention Emily's infantilization of a very autistic-coded character, but I'm trying very hard to not just come off as being like the people who have harassed Emily and Ally over their roleplaying choices in the past. As I keep stressing, I like both of them and especially Emily because I've been a CollegeHumor fan longer than some D20 fans have been alive. I think I actually like Fig more accepting that she kinna canonically sucks and taking her as more a Complicated Woman than someone whose actions I need to reconcile with the expectation of her being better than that, although I know none of it will ever actually be addressed.

So yeah, all the Bad Kids have been fucking weird this season in ways they weren't in SY. Adaine's intense and completely inexplicable loathing of Kipperlilly was funny at first and then increasingly uncomfortable as it fed into the fans wanting to crucify her. Gorgug going full bully was weird but also like, a one line bit, but whatever. Riz stealing Kipperlilly's file was gross and would or SHOULD deeply hurt Jawbone if he ever found out, and you can say they had to do this horribly unethical action in the name of homeland security or whatever, I accept that there were extenuating circumstances, but it's given no thought whatsoever and absolutely no regard is given to the fact that she was trying to address her issues with the closest mental health professional available who Brennan goes out of his way to note is failing her by overcorrecting for his bias towards the BKs.

But as much as I genuinely believe Brennan has been planting seeds the Rat Grinders could be reached, he's not been great here either and like Mice & Murder these things are more on him than any of the players because he's the director here. Like, I'm embarrassed I got snippy with someone who guessed ahead of time that Kipperlilly desecrated the rogue teacher's grave, but nonetheless think it was a weird conclusion to reach and that it's just even more bizarre that it ended up being "right", except the way it's described doesn't even make sense.

Like, the goal was "find the rogue teacher", right? And the rogue teacher is dead. So to me, it certainly seems like bringing a back hoe to the graveyard is one hundred percent the right move! But even if we accept the apparent canonical intent that was Kipperlilly threatening to merely destroy the grave as an act of vandalism rather than retrieve the body, it's like...so what? Literally who cares? As if the Bad Kids or any other adventuring party wouldn't dig up a dead body to cast Speak with Dead or something, as if the foundational Dungeons & Dragons formula wasn't raiding tombs like 19th-century colonial archeologists? And why would any of that be necessary anyway, when Riz found Eugenia by just...walking up to the grave?

But regardless, that, you might say, is a matter of the Rat Grinders being unfairly presented as evil and not the Bad Kids being unfairly presented as good. When it comes to Brennan's part in it, though, these are the same issue, because as the creator and director of every atom of the world outside the PCs, he's just so very willing to go with what the players start to expect. That's fine for a home game, but this is like, a television show that people pay money for, and that's an issue. He'll plant enough seeds of the Rat Grinders being better than they're treated that a chunk of the audience will notice and think the players are being weird about them, but he won't push it further than that and instead just rolls with the players being weird because his first priority is their enjoyment.

Again, fine in a home game, obviously. But it creates this divide between the players and the audience because the world has been crafted in such a way that when the players being weird is noticed it's like, why are they being rewarded for that? Why are they getting zero pushback? Brennan and I both heavily, heavily value collaborative storytelling for good reason, it's why I love TTRPGs and actual plays, but if this were a story told by a single person you could either have the protagonists pick up on those hints, have it be a point that they didn't pick up on them, or just not even include them in the first place.

One of the reasons I really, really like Aabria's DMing, as I've said recently, is that she truly remains firm in her worldbuilding and is not shy about providing realistic consequences or acknowledging PC behavior is dissonant with what's going on around them. And it just makes it super ironic that Kipperlilly's whole deal is correctly identifying the fact that the world is warped around the Bad Kids, and in this season more than ever the DM is like, fully changing reality to accommodate them and giving them plot resolutions on a silver platter, to the point of letting them just full-on take back spells because the target turned out to not be there, which is pretty far beyond the quibble about the climactic move in Calamity's final boss fight.

It's not that I think D20 is 'rigged' exactly, because it's not really a game, or at least it's not really Dungeons & Dragons. This was a revelation I had when I watched Critical Role other than Calamity for the first time and was amazed by how they'd stand around after a battle looting bodies for random magic items. D20 isn't a sandbox TTRPG, it's a very on-rails shooting gallery with roughly as much choice in the narrative as a modern RPG video game, and it has to all wrap within a certain amount of sessions. That's fine, but occasionally it can feel deceptive when we pretend there's much chance of things going radically wrong. One of the reasons I liked the first half of Crown of Candy and all of The Ravening War so much is because they're the only times where failure has really, truly been on the table in an Intrepid Heroes season, but I still liked most of the other Intrepid Hero seasons nonetheless.

This season, I just, I dunno man. I don't believe Ice Feast just accidentally wah wah wah had the effect of completely neutralizing the primary threat of the final boss fight. And Blimeygate, like, I thought it was mostly a fun moment, but it also felt like the most exaggerated-for-marketing-purposes the "got'em!" bits have ever been.

But despite all that, I am still currently capable of enjoying the next season. I'm hoping next week does not make things dramatically worse.

[olderthannetfic]

https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/751011464262860800?source=share

Seeing the numbers compared, I realized that you are right, anon. It's a privilege to be able to write long fics, regardless of them thinking they're unable to write short fics because short fics are mostly scenes so it's not that long fic writers are incapable of writing short stories, deep down, they don't want to. Maybe it feels wrong for them since they've made an impression they always write long fics, maybe they find short fics less impressive, or believe that people won't give the same feedback as when they post something longer.

But I would like to argue that longer doesn't mean it has a plot. I've read 80k words of a character getting tortured with no chance of figuring things out or getting out of that situation and ended quite the same as the start. I've read 25k fic of characters just hogging. These fics have no stakes, no crisis, no buildup, no development, nothing just series of the same scene over and over with different sets or different positions.

Fanfic is free and that is why you encounter things that are, in a way, out of the box and technically are not allowed in the publishing world. But that's the beauty of it. Is it really that big of a gap for people who can write long fics vs people who can only write short fics? Because of how free fanfiction is, most things are okay to do, including only being able to write plotless or short.

One reason why I get jealous of other authors who manage to write longer fics than me is because I was too busy at the time. I found a good system for myself (dedicating a certain time to finish a chapter and then uploading them as I edit and so on) and you can build your own. I think with the right system, anyone can do it.

Pantsers, plotters, and hybrids are equal to me and it's true because how do you know that a person didn't just recycle the same plot they use from their previous fics, thus being able to write different versions of that story? We've seen the viral meme abt fic writers recycling the same thing and a lot of people admit to doing it. Does this mean they're mediocre or bad writers? It's not like that's against the TOS or illegal. Nobody paid us to keep making fresh new ground-breaking stories. The quality of a fanfic is decided from how you treat it. Do you still like it even after five years? Do you think about it sometimes? Do you feel so ashamed you'd rather put it in an anon collection or close your acc completely and orphan it? Do you wish for it gone to the point you delete every trace of it?

It's not from the amount of kudos, hits, or comments, tho yes it is easier to find good ones if you filter by kudos but there are lots of underrated ones and I've DNF a lot of fics that are not to my liking but have high-kudos because people keep rec-ing it. I want underrated fics to be more popular but not because it needs to be popular but because I hope to be in a community with more like-minded people. Fanfic has no publisher, we can't earn from it so traffic is merely informative so it's the community that matters the most.

In fact, to tell you the truth, after 17 years of being in ao3, I've curated my tag very specifically and stopped using the fandom tag and went straight to the ship tag. I also mostly rely on bookmarks, private collections, word from mouth of people I trust or believe to have the same writing style and taste as me. So it was very niche and limited.

Lots of stories have plots but not all must be in your favor so you gotta figure what you like to start. Are you team canon divergence or AU? what trope do you like? Telling someone to stop comparing is ineffective. We always compare because that's how we communicate. But people feel inferior because they don't feel worthy of themselves. If you start to know what you want, it's easier for you to write more. Whether you're still stuck on making 1k-2k, etc, at least you don't waste your time feeling sad or down and you keep writing. That'll help stimulate your brain and you will improve.

(Also maybe just don't listen to authors who you think are humblebragging. Mute or block them if you need to because I know, to some people who are in the same fandom, these types of attitude have more context to it. Idk abt anon, but in some cases maybe they were moots or the account was owned by another fan they've encountered on tumblr or other social media often, a BNF maybe, or just a popular author that other fans praise or talk about often, and things could get personal. Shit can go south quickly in the community tbh)

--

There's definitely an art to condensing one's thoughts into only a few words.

[gffa]

The thing I really miss about Star Wars novels is exemplified by being two-thirds of the way through Inquisitor: Rise of the Red Blade and how I think I'm legitimately enjoying it, but in a very specific way, and I think there's actually a ton you could dig into the structure and bias of the narrator that I think is done on purpose and that I can find sympathy for a character actively falling to the dark side and what she's going through without validating the people she's demonizing in her head because I've been there, I have had my brain lying to me all my life, telling me things I know aren't true, making me believe them despite all evidence otherwise, and do you guys KNOW how much I love hot messes of a disaster lady? I fucking love a woman who is just an awful mess and doesn't have to actually be perfect or nice and maybe just once or twice says a kind of catty thing, NO, SHE IS A WHOLE ASS MESS and I LOVE HER!! But also I'm kind of in the position of how I'm tired of getting stories of characters falling to the dark side being the vast majority of what stories explore with the Jedi, I enjoy them, but not when that's all there is, and I have spent YEARS AND YEARS going back and forth with the discussions about the Jedi and I am so tired of it, I DON'T WANT TO ANYMORE. I just want to write my commentary and thoughts down in the vein that I have them and have that be it. I want to say, "This is a really glorious unreliable narrator here, because everything she says is contradicted by what the Jedi actually say/do, and she is explicitly a character designed with neurodivergent/mental health issues aspects in mind and you can't divorce that from her character." and like I don't even want to discuss with other Jedi fans about what the author may or may not have said (I read one interview from her at the beginning, enjoyed it fine, and AM NOT INTERESTED in knowing or hearing anything further) or how annoying it is to have a book like this, I JUST WANT TO DIG INTO A STORY and not have to worry about bracing myself for combat. (And also the thorny issue of how this isn't precisely a recommendation because I'm not sure others would enjoy it, like even if you agreed with me, I'm not sure it'd be something in your wheelhouse, but I don't want to even get into that, it feels exhausting, like, just I want to talk about how I'm enjoying it, but not have to articulate why I think others possibly wouldn't, just leave it at "nah, I don't think you'd enjoy it".) I know this is some IRL stuff spilling over onto my reading of this book and I'm aware of the state of a lot of creators in SW right now hold opinions that have made me stop reading their works because I am no longer interested in anything they have to contribute, but also like. Sometimes I just want to enjoy a book on my own terms and not have to feel like I'm arguing a case, but instead reveling in the glorious hot mess of a central female character that maybe I relate to and have sympathy for even while recognizing that she is painting a very unreliable portrait within the book, because I Have Been There. Idk, I'm not saying this very well, and a lot of it is outside factors, but I have this giant tangled ball of "I just want to enjoy something for once, not examine why it might actually be doing my Blorbos all wrong", like aren't we supposed to be in fandom for the enjoyment of things, not to constantly argue with people? /tired and hasn't been sleeping well and has been thinking about this instead of wrenching irl stuff

[thesweetnessofspring]

What are your thoughts about the epilogue? Specifically this sentence :

It took five, ten, fifteen years for me to agree. But Peeta wanted them so badly.

How do you interpret it?

Disclaimer : this question is for textual analysis, it's not meant to incite fandom war. please DNI if you don't like this topic.

Thank you so much.

@curiousnonny

I have already made a post on why Katniss deciding to have children was her biggest and final rebellion against the Capitol and in that point out that Katniss's decision previously to not have children came from her trauma and not because she wouldn't want to be a mother.

Katniss is very maternal and clearly enjoys taking care of others, even if that comes with "terror." She loves Prim and has a very maternal role with her in a way that is not a given for an older sister. We see it again with Rue, with Wiress in the Quell, with noticing children in the Seam and the little girl in yellow in the Capitol. And it's also worth noting how she dreams of Peeta being a father and how warm and happy that makes her even through the next morning.

As for the quote, the key word here is agree. I've seen some people take that as if Katniss is a light switch and she was fully against the idea of having children until Peeta nagged her enough that she switched from "disagree" to "agree." But really, agreement is a bit of a spectrum. Obviously ultimately having children, Katniss had to be on board. And that process took 15 years. But was Peeta nagging and guilting a Katniss who was vehemently opposed to having children for 15 years?

I really want anyone who thinks this to find one instance when Peeta guilted Katniss over anything. Not Katniss feeling guilty he loved her so much when she wasn't there yet, but where he was arguing and manipulating her to do something she told him she didn't want. That idea is so against everything in Katniss and Peeta's relationship and against Peeta's character.

Most likely, Katniss spent 15 years thinking...it would be great to have children...but what if something happens to them?...but look at that cute little kid over there...is this world safe enough?...Peeta would truly make the best father a child could ask for...would I be a good mother?...how dare that person speak to their child that way, I would never...

When she says "but Peeta wanted them so badly" is giving us what ultimately tipped the scales for Katniss to agree, that Peeta's desire was bigger than her fears.

Also as a note, it's important to remember that the epilogue, like the rest of the series, is written in present-tense. So we are getting Katniss's thoughts in the moment. And in the moment, she's seeing her children literally dancing on the grave of 90% of the District 12 citizens she grew up with (including her children's paternal grandparents and uncles). I think it's natural her mind would be more on her concerns in that moment than anything. But like Katniss says, "only the joy of holding her in my arms could tame" the terror (emphasis mine). And that's what I walk away with and love about the epilogue. That Katniss, ever the protector, has fears and concerns for her children, but love for Peeta and love for her children also give her the joy to keep living. And isn't that how life is? "It's the things we love most that destroy us" but also, it's the things we love most that give our life meaning.

[riorsonxaden]

*disclosure: I did get permission from Sillycranes to post a ss of their tiktok and the curated messge for reports on etsy.

Okay, so for those of you unaware, people have been selling commissioned bindings of fanfic, binded copies of fanfic and pdfs of fanfic on all various platforms (etsy, mercari, Amazon, Google books, eBay, tiktok, insta). This is illegal and downright disgusting especially when authors have specifically stated they do not give permission. People are changing $140 us dollars and up for fics that us writers published for free. We use our personal free time. Dedicate endless hours of writing and research to create fics for free. Without profit in mind because we love our fandoms and our ships we want more stories with the characters we love.

These individuals are putting all of this at risk, over the past couple years fanfic has grown in popularity. Which should be a good thing it's unfortunately not because people just dive into without any thought and think it's okay to use however because its on the internet. That's simply not true. Per the Copyright Act it is illegal to sell fanfic.

You can bind it, with permission for your own personal collection, you can also gift binds but you cannot sell it. There are so many talented book binders on both tiktok and Instagram who will teach you.

At the present moment, the only fics/fandoms I'm seeing selling minded fics are from the Dramione/hp fandoms, and the acomaf Rhys Pov fanfic. Even if you're not in those fandoms or ship those ships please report these accounts and listings. If you see any fanfic being sold, please report.

Yes, in fandoms we argue over ships, characters, plots, whatever. We also hold fanfic very close to us. We all know how much appreciation we have for fanfic and I hope we can put things like ship wars aside and stop these assholes from potentially ruining this for us.

Below is a SS of tiktok account sillycranes. The third image is a list of accounts that still need to be taken down. If you could please report them.

If you don't know what to say when reporting Sillycranes had another tiktok with a message. Feel free to copy and paste the below passage:

I am writing to bring to your attention that this seller is selling fanfiction which is illegal under the U.S. Copyright law, specifically the Copyright Act of 1976. Fanfiction is considered a derivative work, and as such, it infringes on the original work's copyright. Additionally, the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA) and the Lanham Act also prohibit the sale of fanfiction.

*prior to this post, it looks like Novabindery has been shut down. The other two remain. There's also these Etsy stores that needs to be shut down.

WalpurgisKnight

Booksbroughthome

Dawntreaderbinds

Digitalhavenlibrary

Illyriantremors (to my acknowledgment this isn't the illyriantremors it's some using their name to sell their fics)

[phightinghottakes]

Uhm, here I have some thingies to say on Scythe.

I think she's well designed, and her colord are nice BUT:

-- I don't think that her skin color matches the palate. And no, I'm not being racist, as a mixed person, I don't tend to be biased in either direction. If she was made to be black originally, then I wouldn't say anything, as that would be kinda weird. But, because she was made with a skin color that fit her palate perfectly well, only to be made darker, which doesn't match, bothers me a bit. There are many other characters that would've been better to make darkskinned, if they just wanted to be inclusive (Banhammer, Skateboard, Boombox, etc.). Also, I feel like when creators try and be inclusive, they forget that there are more colors than just 'black'and 'white', they could've just kept her light-skinned, or made her look more mixed, but no, there are only two races. Other than that, I don't have much to say, she's basically perfect, and it's not like her skin color ruins the design, it just bothers me a little bit.

2. Personality is a bit off

-- In all homesty, she's a new character, so it's a bit odd how people expect her to already be fully fleshed out, however, she feels like a predator, ehoch makes sense, seeing that she's a serial killer, bit there's something else that triggers me a little, but maybe I'm just sensitive

-- (This is going to get me argued with, so let me put a disclaimer: Scythestaff is a perfectly fine ship, this os my personal opinion and why I don't PERSONALLY like it, do not argue with me, because there is nothing to argue about, I am allowed to share my opinion as you are yours. I would also like to very quickly mention that I have been involved in these sorts of 'being flirted with unwantedly by a much older person' relationships, so that makes me biased and 'sensitive' to this sort of stuff)

-- I don't like the way she talks to Vinestaff. It feels like she's flirting, but not in the healthy way, and Vinestaff doesn't seem to like it based off of her responses. Scythe is, fundamentally (in my mind and from what I have read), cat-calling a much younger woman who is communicating that she is uncomfortable with that. And for me, that makes me like her character much less, not that I'm saying I liked the fact that she was a killer, but there's something about being a creep that's... more uncomfortable for me.

3. TRUE EYE

-- One thing I will say is that i like the fact that there isn't much about the True Eye, it gives us room to theorize, to be involved, to IMAGINE! Maybe it's just cause I grew up with Matpat and like writing, but I enjoy having to come up with own ideas and digging for information. We have a basic idea of some of the relations and statuses, as well as information on Lost Temples itself, and I feel like that's all I need.

-- I guess it's resonable to rather be handed lore, but i like being able to form ideas as a fandom, through creative writing and posts, not being spoon-fed information.

4. Fanart and stuff

-- I like most of the fanart where she had a more 'masculine' build (less curves, flatter chest, muscular), over where she's incredibly feminine. I don't think there's anything wrong with making he feminine, but I just imagine her being a lean woman, so she wouldn't have much shape or fat on her

-- This links to the fact that I don't think that she looks too old. For one part, in this day and age, not a lot of 40 years old, specifically not the rich ones (which Scythe definitely is, have wrinkles and that sort of stuff. I think she has SOME wrinkles, but it's not very noticeable. Also, she's probably really fit, seeing as she's a serial killer, the weapon she uses, and just her overall character. I do get why people would rather her look older, though, I just think that she would look closer to 30 than anything else.

-- I also don't like her being used for fan service. She is a strong, independent, powerful, dangerous woman, not someone you can 'fix' or should make to solely be simped on, not to say that she should be unattractive, just keep her other factors in, not just the fact that she's 'sexy'.

That's all I really have to say on her. I'll talk about someone else later!!

-- 🌒 : D

.

[lynxindisguise]

hi! 🧐 +🦅

also might i add another question that wasn’t in the ask game? i was wondering what “makes” a character for you. since you write the same characters over and over in so many different, unique ways but they still feel very themselves - like the right mix of canon+your take on them.

i hope these aren’t too much! i love your writing and i’m a little nerd haha

(sending this on anon but my dead gay wizards sideblog is @alltheyoungmoons!)

hello! oh that's so lovely, thank you!!

🧐 Do you spend much time researching for your stories?

it really depends on what I'm writing! my research for my most recent chapter of everywhere everything involved re-reading my own fic and watching videos of baby bears lol. sometimes there's very little research, sometimes I'm typing a lot of unhinged questions into google, sometimes I'm spending hours on youtube finding the right chess game to copy into a fic. the most common thing I check is probably dates, full moons, star charts, etc.

🦅 Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?

this also depends on the fic, but generally I start with the basic concept, establish the world/character relationships and then discover things as I go. or I might have certain scenes in mind but not necessarily know how I end up there. it feels a lot more organic for me to write without a full outline.

What “makes” a character for you?

this is really difficult to put my finger on actually! I don't think too much about it when I'm writing—it really is just vibes, and then adjusting those vibes to fit the world.

but I will say I think fandom gets stuck a lot on arguing over who has which specific, black-and-white traits when characters to me are a lot more about how they interact with the world. do they internalise or externalise things? how much information do they need before they act? how open are they to new perspectives/ideas? whose opinions do they value most? (their own, friends, family, society, etc.)

fic writer asks