#(Which Is Helping Me Feel . Better. Yeah Thats All Im Saying)
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#hello to anyone who happens to b interested in the saga of my life... also maybe the irl person i gave my url to... hopefully my blog#didnt freak her out too much lol. anyway so its been a busy week? 2 weeks? month? year? life? its been a lot. my parents helped me move#across the country from the desert to somewhere that's beautiful and green. my dad is so jealous of me lol its so so so pretty and theres s#so much to do. will i do any of it? that remains to be seen but im gonna try to be better about that sort of thing. try to get some help#with the thoughts in my head that keep me from doing and enjoying most things. its weird like im decorating my new room which i love. the#location and living situation seem ideal and i really hope i can stay here all 5 years of my program but i was picking a lot of bright#colors and now it feel uncomfortable. like if i wear things that r too bright or my room is too bright without dark contrast it feel weird#like if im wearing it it kinda makes me feel sick. idk what thats abt. anyway. ill try to heal my brain and im just so happy to b out of the#southwest. i was so so so excited when we were leaving thr city and even more so when we left the state. i cant believe im here. in December#it felt like a million years away and i really truely could not fathom how i was gonna survive that long. my thoughts were so distorted. but#i did and here i am. and in like a month i should b starting my phd program and my parents were telling me how excited ppl r for me and#jealous of where im living and im glad. im glad they're excited. i think i am too but its under a layer of: if i get excited it wont happen#im not allowed to b excited or it wont happen. which is irrational but ya kno. anyway so that's yeah. im so happy to have a fresh start and#the town seems super cool. a liberal blip in a sea of... not that so theyre very visibly pride forward haha and i think itll b way easier#for me to get around without driving. and im gonna try to make friends. i need someone to tell me where to get tattoos haha. so yea im happy#but exhausted and i dont wanna go back to work and so so greatful to my parents for being wonderful ppl idk how bc both of them had fucked#up childhoods. like my mum will say the saddest shit and im like bro this is y i don't wanna talk to my grandma fuck her and my dads parents#r so fucked. like my nana is the reason im so fucking control freaked out but i kno i have issues and she has no insight and thinks shes#better than everyone. anyway hopefully i can get back to drawing a posting more now. ive been drawing it its been in a sketch book#like an actual sketch book for sketching big ideas thst r gonna take fucking forever to draw 😭#so that's all. just uprooted my whole life. thats all. but in a good way :-]#unrelated
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you know i don't bring this up as a light anecdote because it involves me being talked about in really perverted ways behind my back. but when i was like 20 i was part of this large group of friends that was mostly a bunch of guys, and a couple of girlfriends. and the energy if you were a girl starting to hang around them was like. "ok, so who are you gonna hook up with/date?" and it didn't last long bc of course when the answer ended up being "well none of you," the patience they had for me evaporated. lol. so i was being talked about among literally every single one of them behind my back in a gigantic group chat, of like literally everyone in the original group chat (including the ppl who never fucking used it, and it was over twelve people) minus a few other ppl they didn't like, decidedly. and eventually one of my GOOD friends (that i am still friends w to this day) told me about it and then there was the whole drama of people not being able to accept consequences for their actions, not owning up to being cowardly bullies, etc... yawn yawn yawn. truly that was some stupid middle school shit from a bunch of immature ppl that i didn't really take to heart. not the guys, anyway. i was honestly very hurt by a couple of girls who partook in it though, that i thought genuinely liked me and who i genuinely liked in return, so that was shocking to me.
but anyway. after this all happened my sister went OFF on this one guy in particular. bc he had been a nuisance before. he was a slimy creep honestly. i used to feel a lot of pity for him bc i thought he was just sad and wanted attention but that was just my 20-year-old nonsense brain way of interpreting it. he was incredibly annoying and would wear girls down, would hop from one girl to another week after week, each one not reciprocating his constant desperate flirting and lovebombing. and there was a joke he participated in about me and my (also queer, female) friend that was particularly crossing a line. so kaily just ripped this guy a new one when he went to try and offer an explanation. like imagine trying to even talk to someone after you just humiliated and bullied their sister... couldn't be me. like i was literally the one being bullied in this instant but i can't imagine the kind of white hot rage i'd be in if someone did that to my sister. you know? so yeah.
at the end of this rant kaily told him "go to hell." you know. like fuck off. go fuck yourself. go to hell. good old indecent words to throw out at someone you loathe, right? i'm literally ONLY bringing this up because i cannot stop thinking, all these years later, about how one of the girls who participated in it, and was the least apologetic about it (in fact weirdly a year later she came back just to taunt me again and tell me how much better her life is without me and how stupid i was for breaking up a 'wonderful' friend group?? yeah that sounds like the behavior of someone who is over it)... i don't remember where but someone told me she talked particularly about that message to that guy and said "kaily told (name) to burn in hell" like. like that whole time she interpreted my sister as like a conservative christian who was calling him a dirty sinner. bc presumably she had never heard the phrase "go to hell" in a non-literal context before, or just never understood it?? like that girl didn't necessarily strike me as incredibly bright or something, in the short time i knew her, but i never would've guessed she could be so dumb...
but for the record that pervert guy yeah he is gonna burn in hell.
#tales from diana#im sorry how much dramatic backstory that anecdote required#that one girl and her friend are still some of the most baffling pieces of that story to me#like i hate to say it but i was not shocked that all but like two of those guys really liked or respected me at all#none of them seemed to like any of the other girls in the friend group#they just barely seemed to tolerate their friends' girlfriends. bc they had to#and some of those guys didn't even seem to like or respect their girlfriends#both of those girls who bullied me were some of 'the girlfriends' and i have to be honest. i wouldnt wanna be 'the girlfriend' there#neither of them are still w their then-boyfriends and im pretty sure for both of them it ended awfully#idk what happened to the really particularly aggressive one who thought kaily said 'burn in hell'#but for some reason like 6 months later when she and her bf broke up she unfriended me on fb#i had never unfriended her in case she wanted to apologize at any point (i had hope... 20 year old nonsense again i was really naive)#but then yeah another 6 months later she and the other girlfriend (still in a relationship at that time) just blew up at me and some others#for like no reason. just bc we all stayed friends... w each other#like i promise u i never went out of my way to bother these girls in any way. directly or indirectly. they just had to say#'its been a year and i still hate you guys' like why. we were literally all adults. we didnt go to school together we never saw each other#we were all just frankly moving on but i guess they were not over it#the other girl whose relationship lasted longer had maybe the worse boyfriend? definitely the worse breakup#he abandoned her for another woman and kicked her out of their living space#she was literally begging on social media for help#and again that guy was a monster who did not seem to really love her. he's married to the other woman now#they have a kid together#idk where either of those girls are now bc basically all their friends abandoned them#feels like if they had chosen their allies better way back when we were 20-21 itd have been different#which is not to blame them. but like. i would not have let that happen to my friends#but the fact that anyone stood up for me when i was being bullied was 'starting drama'#and the fact that they all let their problems pile up until their lives are destroyed? well i guess thats just being civilized and mature#sorry if this is just sounding incredibly judgmental bc i dont think they deserve their situations at all#but i dont think their choices didnt play some role in their being eventually discarded by rotten fuckin men#they were pretty rotten to me too. poor things...
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legs & lessons in perseverance | march '23
#so.#i fell into the fireplace lol#- thats the concise summary. but ive just been unwell health wise recently. i think ms is just harrowing to deal with#because you can go for so long symptom free and then one day you wake up and everything is wrong#your body feels wrong.#i remember being constantly angry at my body as though its a separate entity. especially when i was like 17/18.#because everytime i had a bad ms relapse i would literally breakdown in angry tears like- at my body. i was good to you. im meditating#im eating healthy. im exercising. ive been good to you.#but then suddenly you cant see or youre shaking uncontrollably or your limbs are numb#or my new favourite one: a couple of weeks ago i woke up at 4 am in a cold sweat. the inside of my thigh was burning#i dont mean like. exercise burning. i mean like struck a hot iron rod burning. it was obv nerve pain but that didnt stave off the panic#so i messaged my neurologist and hes like 'yeah its fine. wanna inject yourself?'#anyway. so recently i was helping my friend get his place houseparty ready and we were cleaning out the fire place#and my legs just gave out 😍#and i got so angry and humiliated i kind of just wanted to go to bed and not wake up tbh#which is what i usually do but like. i was angry. angry. scorpio angry as lidya would say. so i had a nap in his bed#and when i woke up i felt slightly better and for once i thought 'im not going to let my body ruin this day for me'#and i just dragged him to the markets with me. and i still had the tremors but we bought more greens than either of us needed#and we laughed and walked and he carried me to the car at the end of the trip and it was one of the best days ive had in a long while tbh#and it feels impossible but sometimes all u need is to brush the ash from ur knees and hide the scruffs with stockings &maybe youll be ok#💚#tw chronic illness#/ multiple sclerosis
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U.S. Dub 2020!Tentomon to TAI: A FRIEND of Izzy's is a Friend of Mine! M E: \o\ \o/ /o/
#digimon adventure: dub#taishiro#koutai#2020 koutai#2020 koushiro#izumi koushirou#digiadv 2020 us dub#(T H A N K For rE EMPHASIZING This New U.S. DUB)#(Awww 2020 Tentomon's got Personality down)#(Which Is Helping Me Feel . Better. Yeah Thats All Im Saying)#(If I could only listen to U.S. dub 2020 Koushiro + Tentomon from now on HONESTLY I'd Take It)#(though I do still very MUCH Love 2020 Koushiros JPN voice Too)#digiadv 2020 us dub spoilers#(I could only get Tento's lines in quickly but I'll rewatch more eventually for Sora and others later!!)#(The emojis are Me Doing Cheers while Waving HaNDS BC YES FAVS)
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ti's the season ( of reflection)
#january new year new beginnings reflecting to learn n grow and such#realizing a lot about like my life 2 years ago up to a year ago#vent i guess#i lost a actually all of my friends for a few months because they were all like fighting with eachother n then slowly gained like 2 back and#then those 2 fought n like just actually had no one in my corner for a while even my partner at the time wasnt really there for me and for#so long i was just so isolated but had to like pretend everything was fine and i lost my closes friend who was also extremely to my now ex#having introduced us:/ well i guess after a frw months i was able to connect to 2 new friends and i made of with 2 older ones and i lost#like actually 10 or so good friends which sucks so hard actually and like my mother would say oh well you were going to grow apart going to#different colleges anyways but dam what a nasty way to go there was like weird fighting cant even get into all of it for the year before it#and then i was actuslly genuinely depressed for months and i felt like a responsibility#and duty to break up with my partner because i felt i was not there for them at all#and i felt they didnt understsnd me anymore it was a lot going on but i felt the relstionship wasnt good for them and they didnt deserve it#but then after breaking up with them like that so did not help the lonrlyness n numb all cosnuming feeling x#but then i started at a new place and made a few new friends and i got closer than ever with 2 people and i learned a lot#there are 2 friends i still love who dont get along andni miss when they did they were so close and lodt eachother and i see them both#and theyre both doing better i guess#ill always miss like 3 years ago when the kid in my who thought id never make friends felt so proud for being a genuine part of a group#but even then when i was in the group i always felt like no ones first choice and like jesus thats rough idk#and i mean the whole thing about being someonesfirst chose or best friend i mean people contain multidues ur never gonna be like first frvr#but idk now i have such beautiful kind friends and im not depressed anymore#i remeber the first time i stsrted feeling like emotions again and realized i wasnt numb like i had been for a year it was so crazy#like woah depression is a beast theres just..nothing like such nothingness and i remeebr being like oh my god i actuslly feel something#and i started like remeber things again and crying and now i cry so often its something im so grateufl for over the past year#ive really been able to become my self over 2024 and yeah thats emotional there was a lot going on since like 2018 for me#and its finally settling#and im just sorta shocked now because i feel so much emotion so strongly but i like felt nothing and remebr nothing and just loet myself#for so long#like even before tgat there was a lot going on and i felt so out of control and then ntohing for months and then slowly#slowly because i had a few friends who loved me and i had a new routine and i was away from some people i started being me#2025 the year of being me :') also just learned u can only have 30 tags
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I have been playing beastieball and first of all very good game second of all smth smth Olivia Broussard
#rat rambles#oni posting#the second I heard the basic concept I knew I had to make my player character olivia#Ive also been ofc doing an oni naming theme but thats a given#important context in my hcs olivia was a pretty sportsy teenager#but yeah Im also enjoying the endless sense of dread I get anytime I make story progress in this game#I need that guy dead NOW#also I forget their name but yeah rpedictably the nonbinary scientist is my favorite npc currently#but yeah I feel like Im at a weird point game progression wise where Im strong enough to take every fight I know of but I don't know how to#access most of the side content I want to do first so Ive mostly just been further training#dont get me wrong I was still underleveled for the last star coach match I did but they were like level 50 so y'know#I won btw because Im a hashtag gamer (I got my ass kicked the first time but the second time I barely scraped by)#ok I say barely but Im pretty sure I only lost one round most of my party was just on deaths door the whole time#I recently decided to rework my team since I wasn't having a lot of fun with my old one#I might end up mixing and matching my old and new teams a bit eventually but I rly like my current team#Im definitely still learning how to use it well tho and I can definitely feel that offensively it could be better#well actually more like it needs better defense to be more offensive#all my guys have good bulk in at least one damage type but only two are all around capable of taking hits#the other three are incredibly fragile in different stats and as such a lot of my gameplay at higher levels involved baiting and switching#which has been working out well enough so far but it definitely means my battles run slower than Id like#in particular because I only have one beastie capable of healing itself so its easy to back myself into a corner if I take too long#I also definitely need to look into redoing the stats for my dragonfly beastie as while shes fairly bulky she rly needs a bit more bulk#I also super need to look into getting some friendship skills for her since she just doesn't have the tools she needs rn to truly flourish#I believe in her tho she was the main inspiration for my current team and how I wanted it to play#which unfortunately we aren't quite able to do yet due to the fragility of everyone#again they Are quite bulky in certain areas but extremely fragile in others#the exception is my boy joshua who can tank most hits but is noy particularly helpful outside of that rn#which I also want to remedy#now the main question for me rn is if I considered switching out one of my more offensive units for someone with more utility#because a certain nikola may be a needed pivot currently but he was also supposed to be far more offensively useful than he can be atm
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so to do my testing i need a state id but to get my state id i need a social security card bc i lost mine so im waiting up to 15-20 days for social security to send me a verification number in the mail so that i can apply for a new social security card and then ill have to wait for that to get to me and then i can go get my ky id and hopefully not get in trouble for taking so long to get my id changed and THEN i can schedule my ged classes. and by then ill probably have finished my math and science ged readys which is good and ummm i think thats all. itll prolly be a permit rather than a state id so i can work on learning to drive since we have a nice Not horrible car . and then ill know how to drive which will be helpful to me even if it takes me a while to actually own a car... but itd be helpful to Be able to drive yk. even if i am quite late... and once i get all of that done then thats like finally finished and then i can get a job again and start saving up money for when i am ready to move out...
#and once i am Making money again ill feel better going to the dr for all of my stuff bc my mom says itd be covered by insurance but im#rly rly paranoid abt there being copays or something yk . so id like to Have money jic since i currently have. 3 dollars at all#but yes. and im rly lucky im able to live with my family bc like. they wont Make me pay rent they might ask for help which ill gladly do bc#1. yk and 2. i have been living here free of charge for almost a year 3. even all that aside i want the kids to be able to keep living here#and also be able to eat so idm helping with groceries and the mortgage or whathave you... and itll all be cheaper than paying rent at my#own place anyways so i can build up a good net AND ill have money to start donating again bc i hate not being able to donate it makes me#feel so useless. that was the best part of living in wa was that i Had money to be spending and donating was one of the like. bc i have a#lot of hangups abt money so pretty much spending any money made me feel sick and i had to punish myself for it BUT donating bypassed that.#not that the benefit of donating is that i can spend money without feeling bad but it is something i Want to do because i want to be able t#help however i can . obviously. i am rambling now but basically yes im excited to have a job again#idt ill have money to get people gifts this year for xmas Which sucks but hoooooooopefully i will have a job by february.......... dependin#wewill see how it all works out. im hoping february bc thats the start of the 1st wave of bdays. well . technically january is but thats My#bday so it doesnt count.... bc tag feb father mar weeman may. and then lamp sep and mother oct and i couldnt get either of them gifts and#Yeah i feel evil#BUT!!!! next year i will be able to afford everything all of it ill have money and a job and i can get ppl gifts i love buying ppl gifts#even tho im bad at it i fear. bc i dont have much experience last year was the first year i got to buy xmas gifts for everybody... and bday#for some even :] but ya. ive loved buying gifts since 8th grade which was the first time i was able to buy gifts for my friends bc my dad#gave me his credit card for the dc trip. bc we were on kiiiiind of difficult terms in 2018 LOLLL. so he was doing pretty much anything to#get me to talk to him again the perks of having to go to court against your parent. and also girl that restraining order was meaningless bu#whatever i cant think abt it or ill get kinda mad so were moving on Oh im cramping that sucks okayyyyy. anyways. YES so thats your connor u#date i think these tags are gonna get cutoff in a major way. wait nvm i only had like 22... ok well ending it here goodbye my diary
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Maybe you'll find this helpful? But I think the concept of intelligence sort of dissipates as you get older. Because everyone works by their own metrics and specialties. Like, I couldn't tell you the first think about biology, that doesn't make me less intelligent than a dedicated biologist. Just means they specialize in something that I don't. And applies to shit that I'm good with too. It's all just experience. Even within the same profession, you wouldn't look at two brilliant artists and go "yep that one's smarter," without coming across as extremely reductionist. It's sort of hard to have a good relationship with a false concept.
I think the main thing that made me dismissive of the concept is that I couldn't define a coherent metric for it. Even as an abstract concept. Is Intelligence a measurement of the amount of information someone knows? One's propensity to learn and accept new information? Is it a collection of general knowledge or is it specialized knowledge? What information constitutes one's intellect? Is it a static variable or one that's in constant flux? Like, I've generally been above average at math in elementary school, but then I hit a brick wall upon reaching higher levels of it, which involved invoking a different set of skills. So, what does that say about my intelligence on the matter? Another potential metric for the concept is one's propensity to think. But the act of thinking, itself, isn't a measurable concept either. Like, it's the closest approximation to how I'll use the words "smart" and "dumb." Basically as ways of saying "you gave me a lot to think about" or "I don't think you've put in enough thought." But there's a more accurate set of words for that: thoughtfulness, nuance, etc. For the sake of comparison, I'd argue that wisdom is an abstract concept, but still a real one. It's the measurement of one's life-experience. It is abstract because it cannot be objectively measured, but its components are commonly understood.
Also, when I coin the term false concept, I'm just saying it's a concept people invoke and attach meaning to despite the concept itself being rather meaningless. When I say an abstract concept, I mean it's a concept that lacks quantifiability and yet still holds meaning.
I personally find talking about concepts and philosophies to be rather annoying because language is fundamentally imprecise. I dont think thats a fault of English specifically. I think it's more that language is how a person translates their thoughts into a format understood by their peers, and I think my autism just gives me a heightened sense of awareness to its function as a translator. Every word carries a degree of nuance and air for interpretation that makes communicating ideals, especially with non-autistic ppl, tedious. That's also why I end up using a lot of big words and coining a lot of terms; feels more precise.
I want to be smart and be seen as smart by others, its one of the only things I latched onto as a pup that could make me feel like I had something that neurotypical people didn't. It's at best a silly fantasy, but since I'm white I don't really know if I can have a productive relationship with "intelligence" in the first place. Much to think about.
#not sure if thats helpful but i think my relationship with the concept improved upon rejecting it#since i get what you mean about wanting to feel special and stuff and being called smart a lot#tho i definitely have a different relationship with the concept than you#im also autistic and got called smart a lot as a kid#but i feel like whenever im called smart its like ''oh youre smart enough to do X if only you didnt have symptom of mental illness#it would be so easy for you'' which definitely makes the concept unpalitable to me#plus i had a tendancy to venerate people i viewed as smarter than me which was very unhealthy#especially when i had low self esteem and was practically looking for reasons to put myself down#but yeah i think the concept of intelligence is just a lie given to kids to make them feel better about grinding school#and should be expired as an adult especially one with tangible accomplishments#and that take's really ignoring the massive number of kids who never fit into the school system and adults that dont accomplish much#but i think those ppl dont need to hear this because theyve been disillusioned to the concept before reading any of this#and the point im getting at here is that i dont think intelligence is something worth your mental energy when it isnt even real#and the concept itself feels quite manipulative whenever i put any serious concsideration to it#like even if im mistaken and it is a valid concept i dont see a practical use for it beyond gatekeeping#so if the concept of intelligence stresses you out so much perhaps you could try rejecting it all together?#im not really saying this because i know you or am trying to impress you or anything a lot of these thoughts#are conclusions i came to a long time ago and arent particularly novel to me im more laying this out#because i think this mindset has a chance of being helpful or providing insight and I value being helpful
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your boyfriend isagi lets his best friend bachira fuck you while he watches (mostly)
bachira, isagi x f!reader ☆ smut ☆ 0.8k cw: dirty talk(its bad), penetration, cucking, squirting, rough sex, threesome a/n: reupload from ao3. gulp... ive actually been debating whether or not i should post it because i actually feel so embarrassed about it like i cant believe i typed that with my own fingies but my friend convinced me to post it so for my own wellbeing all the smut will be under the cut because i'll start convulsing if i read it against my will :)
☆
how you got into this predicament you weren’t sure. the events leading up to this blurry and hard to even try to remember. all you could think about was now. the present reality being you leaning back against your boyfriend isagi while his best friend bachira fucks into you.
“ah shit isagi- she’s so- fuck- so tight-,” bachiras onslaught of crude words made you helplessly clench around his dick. with your legs behind held up and open by isagi, you were getting mercilessly pounded into. you could hear isagi chuckle darkly from right behind you, his hard clothed dick pressing into your lower back as he squeezed your thighs.
“dont forget to play with her clit bachira,” isagi’s voice was light, playful as he let go of one of your legs to grope at your breasts instead. “wanna feel her cum on you dont you,”
“f-fuck yeah- yeah i do,” without a second of delay he lets a ball of spit fall from his lips, both men’s eyes watching as it fell down right above your sensitive clit. the groan isagi let out had your hips bucking into bachira which just fueled him even more. “you’ll cum for me right y/n? you’ll cum on my dick right? your boyfriend said it’s okay so go ahead,” you whined as bachira kept his eyes on you. there was something unnerving in his eyes and the unwavering desperate smile he had.
“a-ah fuck-,” you couldn’t help but moan at the feeling of bachira pressing his thumb onto your neglected clit, pressing his fingers into your lower abdomen as he moved his thumb in tight circles.
“y/n you sound so good- hah- cum for me baby please- wanna feel it bad,” he was babbling now, head hung low as he continued to drill himself into you. the room was filled with both you and bachira’s moans along with the wet slapping of his tight balls on your cunt.
isagi, getting a tad jealous, wanted you to direct some of your attention back to him. hooking a finger under your jaw he tilted your head up and sideways to look at him before he placed his wet lips on yours.
“shit thats so hot- so hot-,” meguru’s eyes shot up when he heard your muffled moan, almost cuming right then at the sight of his teammate taking control over your mouth, “i’m close- gonna cum- pretty baby how ‘bout you ask your boyfriend where i should cum,” isagi eyes meguru as he sucked on your tongue, a slight smirk tugging at his lips at how fucked out meguru looked.
“you can’t cum until she does,” isagi’s authoritative tone has bachira’s hips stuttering. with a small whine leaving his lips, he brings his thumb back to your clit, circling it roughly.
“cum y/n please cum- i need it- hah fuckfuck- please i- i need-,”
“shit bachira- right there right there- dont stop,” your moaning had both of their dicks twitching, their eyes locking once before a dry chuckle leaves isagi.
“better keep going bachira make my pretty girl feel good she deserves it,” his voice was teasing as he left kisses along your temple, holding your lower face in his hand as he kept your eyes directed onto the scene in front of you.
“call me meguru- fuck baby please say it say my name,” bachira was panting now, babbling away as he tried so hard to not cum. he needed you to cum. needed to feel you cum around and call his name.
“meguru i’m cum- im cumming ah shitshitshit,” before you had even a moment to realize what was happening, you were squirting around his dick. you were all but seeing stars as isagi reached a hand down to slap at your clit as meguru pulled out.
“ fuck you’re so hot- squirting on me like that fucck-,” both you and meguru were a fucked out mess as isagi continued to abuse your clit and bachira kept bullying his cock before he came onto your stomach.
“yoichi- ‘s too much- w-wait-,” you squirmed in isagis hold as he continued to fuck you through your orgasm. his eyes were wide and fixated on your squirting cunt, having not ever seen you do that before. bachira watched with hungry eyes as the sheets below turned dark with your cum, your squirt soaking his dick and thighs.
you began to tear up at the stimulation, desperate moans leaving your mouth as you told isagi it was too much but to keep going. having never seen isagi so dominating, bachira didn’t look away when isagi jerked your head towards him, ordering you to open your mouth before spitting inside. bachira could feel his dick getting hard all over again just from the filthy sight alone.
“fucked her so good you made her squirt,” isagi muttered as he kept his eyes on your cunt. there was no way in hell he was going to tell bachira that he was the first one to do so. “ ‘m gonna fuck her now ‘n since you were so nice to her-,” isagi was quick to reposition you so you were straddling him, laying your head on his chest as you tried to even out your breathing “i’ll let you fuck her ass,”
i hope you enjoyed !! reblogs/comments are very much appreciated <3
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“what the fuck do you two think youre doing?”
shit, you think, you didnt notice the balcony door had been slid open until you heard the voice of one of your brothers. you start to pull away from suna’s lips which earns you a small whine from his end, his grip tightens around you and honestly it its quite cute the way he is trying so hard to savour the moment. “come back later, we’re kinda busy.” the boy mutters before trying to move your face away from the distraction so that he can kiss you once more.
“suna you get your hands off of her right now, i dont give a fuck that its your birthday.” osamu pipes up, he looks furious and a little bit disgusted, if it hadnt been for the situation youre in right now you would think its kind of funny.
“samu lay off him, it was a mutual agreement, im just as guilty as he is ok?” that does not seem to help the boys understand, if anything they seem even more angry with you both.
“what the fuck do you mean it was a mutual agreement? are you two hooking up or something? yn he just turned 18 a few hours ago are you forgetting that?” atsumu says, he is rambling on with every excuse he can think of as to why this is “so wrong��, from the corner of your eye you can see suna trying so very hard to hide the grin that is creeping its way onto his face, his hands still all over you despite the fact that you arent alone anymore.
“listen, it was his birthday wish ok? i swear it didn’t mean anything,” sunas grip begins to loosen ever so slightly, “i just though it would get him off my back and get him over his little crush on me.” suna’s facial expression shifts but you choose to ignore it, you have bigger problems to deal with at the moment.
“no this is not ok, how would you feel if me or samu kissed one of your friends because it was their birthday wish?”
“that’s different, why would my friends want to kiss either of you?”
“excuse me? ill have you know that many women want to kiss me! and dont think youre getting off the hook either suna, ill make sure you never-“ you dont even want to hear the threat that is about to come out of his mouth, you just want to get out of this shitty situation.
“boys please, just give us five minutes to talk and then we will be back inside ok? i promise.” your efforts to plead with your brothers finally work.
“…fine,” atsumu mumbles, “but this better be a one time thing. im not gonna deal with you two being all lovey dovey around me.” and with that he lightly tugs on osamu’s sleeve, signalling him to walk back inside and continue the party. he closes the balcony door but not before bringing two fingers up to his eyes and then pointing them at the two of you. its a warning.
you turn back to suna and notice the sad look on his face - he looks kinda cute like this, “so, what do-“.
“did you really mean what you just said to them?” the poor boy looks heartbroken, after waiting three years to finally have a chance with the girl he loves wants the moment is ruined like that? “did you actually just do that so i would leave you alone?” his hands fully leave your body now and he takes a step back to put some distance between you two.
“well i mean sort of yeah… ive never looked at you in any way other than my brothers best friend if im going to be honest, i dont know if thats because of the age difference or what but ive never thought we could be anything.” the look of hurt is prominent on his face no matter how hard he tries to hide it, normally playful banter would have been thrown back and forth between the two of you but rintarou just stays silent, an indication that youve fucked up.
“listen suna i dont know what you want me to say, i wasnt really thinking when i said that to atsumu it just came out. i am 4 years older than you and many people would not approve of us if i decided to give you a chance.”
“who cares? i could treat you so right if you would just let me. i have waited entirely too long for this moment, all im asking for is one date.”
“you said that about the kiss too, one thing is never enough with you is it? you always need more.” a playful smile creeps onto your face which is outshined by the one on sunas, he knows that your smile means that you agree to go on a date with him.
“i really hope you arent fucking with me right now, that would be so cruel, especially on my birthday.”
“oh give the birthday excuse a rest now will you? you dont need to keep on at me you have already got what you want.”
“mhm i absolutely have,” he walks closer and once again wraps his arms around you, placing a hand under your jawbone to make you look up at him, “and i couldnt be happier.” he states as he pulls you in for a passionate kiss once more <3
#ignore it took me over a year to post part two please and thanks#haikyuu#hq x you#haikyuu!!#hq imagines#lav.posts♡#haikyuu suna#suna x reader#suna rintaro#haikyuu x reader#hq suna#suna rintarō#suna rintaro x you#haikyuu imagines#suna x you#haikyuu fluff#suna rintaro haikyuu#suna rintaro imagine#suna rintaro x reader#suna fluff#suna rintarou#suna x y/n#suna rintarou fluff#suna rintaro x y/n#suna rintaro fluff#suna rinatro#suna headcanons#suna hcs#suna rintaro fic#haikyuu drabbles
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FORGIVENESS.
rafe cameron x male reader
genre: angst
warnings: homophobia, regret, angst with no comfort, sad ending
Rafe the kook king, while you were a pogue, it was rare to see Rafe get along with anyone especially pogues but you were different, the way your eyes creased when you would smile, the way your hair would wave with the air, Rafe couldn’t get enough of it, but he knew it was wrong.
It was a perfect night for a party, the air was warm and the night was still young. You were a cater at Rafes party, pouring drinks to alcoholic teenagers and passing around food. The only reason why you were doing this was because of Rafe, he told you that he needed help with the party so of course you as his amazing boyfriend would help out.
“Why’s he here?” Topper questioned, Rafe turned to glance at where Topper looked and saw you. “I don’t know just ignore him.” He stated to Topper and continued to pay attention to his drug deal.
You continued to go around and fill peoples cups until you stopped infront of Rafes table, “Anyone need refills?.” You asked Rafe and the surrounding, Kelce scoffed, “Why would we want anything from a Pogue, especially a fag.” He spat out making Topper laugh.
Everyone in the Outer banks knew you were gay, this wasn’t a surprise because one of your ex’s who was a kook had told everybody this. You swore after that to never mingle with the kooks again, but maybe Rafe was different, maybe he would actually stand up for you this time against his friends, and maybe he would actually show that he cared.
But Rafe only looked at you with sincerity in his eyes, ultimately not saying a word for his own kook pride. Rafe knew kooks and pogues never mixed so for the sake of his dignity, he kept quiet. You look glanced down at Rafe and kept eye contact with him to see if he would stand up for you, but nothing, this caused a sharp pain of hurt to go through your body.
“Now move along or you’ll regret it.” Topper threatened. You turned around with tears in the corner of your eyes and walked off to the bathroom.
Rafe watched as you walked away with regret in his chest. “What the hell you guys.” He retorted to his friends, “Whats wrong bro he’s a pogue, theres no reason to feel bad.”
Kelce stated, “Yeah plus hes a fag, he had it coming for him.” Topper said and they both laughed again.
Rafe hated how his friends treated you, he wanted to do something everytime they talked to you like that because he did care, he loved you, and he wanted to be with you forever. He thought about everything that his friends had did to you and how he never stood up against them, thats when Rafe decided to stand up and go after you.
“Where are you going Rafe?” Topper asked with confusion, “Just shut up” Rafe said to him leaving Topper and Kelce dumbfounded.
You sliently sobbed on the bathroom tiles and couldn’t stop crying. You decided to look at yourself at the mirror, which caused you to start questioning everything Rafe had did to you that made you hurt, “Why did he never say anything”, “Why was he letting his friends talk to me like that”, “Did he ever even love?.” this last thought lingering in your head.
Rafe had searched all over the house for you until he saw the bathroom door, he knocked “M/n? are you in there?” You looked up at the door and recognized his voice, the voice that used to make you smile, the voice that you used love to hear, and the voice that used to make your days better. “M/n please open the door.” Rafe begged.
You opened the door and saw Rafes face change into an apologetic look. He saw how your face was stained with tears and how your tears prickled off your chin. “M/n im so sorry” He caught you into a tight embrace and started to caress the back of your head.
Rafe had hugged you for a little more but you never hugged back. He let you go and looked at your face “M/n?” Rafe was concerned, you always hugged him back, you told him that his hugs were the best, but this time it was different, the air was cold around you as you were staring down at the tiles.
“Lets break up.” You said coldly
#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey x male reader#drew starkey x you#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x male reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron#angst#male reader angst#male reader#obx#outer banks#outerbanks x male reader#fanfic
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WE'RE... WHAT?? ‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅
| percy jackson x popstar au
| au masterlist ☽
summary:
warnings: swearing and i think thats just about it!
a/n: part two of the series is out! im procrastinating the shit out of all my other requests so im not ignoring any of you btw!! lets all collectively ignore the fact that gracie like a post that has a lyric from her song (also damn im really just smashing out these fics)
"y/n has officially flitted off to boston!" clarisse announces suddenly from chris's lap.
"huh?" grover's head snaps up. "what do you mean?"
"y/n l/n, she's come to boston for her concerts," clarisse says showing her phone screen.
"you have got to be shitting me," chris says. "this is going to end terribly. seriously? here? boston? percy's gonna shit himself."
"oh really why would you think that?" clarisse drawls. "it's not like they don't like each other, they're like besties!"
"and y'know to make things worse y/n's setlist has been posted for months so we legit could've avoided her," chris sighs.
"yeah well, next time you see percy and he comes home grumbling about a business meeting in boston you deal with it then," grover argues.
"okay all of you shut it, percy's coming inside with luke so shhh," clarisse snaps.
"shh about what?" luke asks settling down on the couch next to grover.
"you'll never believe who's in boston!" grover sing songs. it doesn't take luke very long to work out who and his eyes widen in realisation
"no."
"yes."
"well shit."
"yep."
"we're in for a show."
☾. ⋅
percyjackson
liked by underovergrover, chris.rodriguez, lukecastellan, clarisse.la.rue, the.annabethchase and 1, 402, 385 others
percyjackson hello boston! one non-reschedulable meeting later and here we are...
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underovergrover i expect full compensation for making those pizzas WHICH YOU TOOK CREDIT FOR
percyjackson YOU DID NOT! I MADE HALF OF THOSE - MINE WERE BETTER
clarisse.la.rue no they weren't
percyjackson 🖕🏼
user1 ugh im in love
user2 omggg he's in boston!! so is y/n l/n!! are they following each other around?
user3 PLS I WOULD DIE MAKE THIS A THING
user4 i wonder if he's going to a concert here?? 😏
user5 does anyone else find it weird how his entire friend group follows him around?? no just me? they're just a huge freak show
user6 booooo we dont like haters here
user7 y/n l/n and percy neeeeed to happen rnnnn
user8 YES YES YES
lukecastellan im so ready to be done with this shit and go home
theannabethchase aww is someone feeling homesick?
lukecastellan yes obviously
user8 i. love. him.
☾. ⋅
"see i told you this would happen!" grover screeches, running away from percy who is threatening to castrate him if he doesn't get his phone back.
"i don't care! just give me the damn thing back!"
percy had groaned for two straight minutes when he found out that y/n was in boston this weekend - he had also face planted onto the couch and used some extremely obscene words.
"if it helps at least you'll be leaving on sunday," chris had offered in the midst of his crisis. it didn't help.
so now when grover trips over a fallen pillow - which may or may not be from percy's tantrum but we don't talk about that - and percy wrenches the phone from him a loud - and might grover add overtly girly - scream.
"WHAT THE FUCK? NO! NO NO NO NO!"
his screen is on the article grover had opened with really poorly photoshopped images of percy and y/n walking together. every gossip site/blog has swarmed the photos and circulated them sending the internet into a spiral.
"im fucking done with this grover," percy groans flopping onto the couch. "its a good thing we're leaving tomorrow - we'll be back in new york thats a huge ass city i wont see y/n there again and i can just go into hibernation, let all the rumours die down and be done with this whole shit show."
if only right....
☾. ⋅
☾. ⋅
yn.official
liked by sabrinacarpenter, lia.mandel, gracieabrams and 932, 841 others
yn.official feel like maybe i might go to boston! you were the best audience and im honoured to have performed for you these past two nights! heading home now to rest and recharge for the final shows in new york
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lia.mandel yayy you're finally coming home i missed you 🥺
yn.official bitch please its been like a week
lia.mandel and every second of it has been torture
user1 MOTHERRRR
user2 i think i nearly fainted when she came up on stage i was so happy i coulda died right then-
user3 the lyric makes me so happyyy
user4 ikrr y/n is like the queen of lyrics and the way she sneakily adds them into her posts 🤭
user5 WERE YOU WITH PERCY JACKSON THIS WEEKEND?? 🤨 I NEED TO KNOW
user6 y/n and percy are my dream celebrity ship
user7 they'd be the biggest power couple in history
user8 can you hard launch with percy plss?? i dont care if its fake i just need content to feed my delusions!
☾. ⋅
lia's soft snores fill the plane aggravating the hell out of you. usually you'd find the way she curled up in a ball underneath a blanket and snored quietly to be adorable. but since you're tired, just finished performing a concert and there's a problem with the jet, its grating on your nerves.
you had also been scrolling on twitter, instagram and pinterest, curled up underneath a matching blanket urging something to catch your attention while whatever work was being done on the plane happened.
unfortunately for you the thing that did catch your attention was the dozens of very clearly photoshopped pictures of you and percy walking together on a quiet street in boston.
no way in hell thats real. for one; ew and two; percy was only here for the weekend you were here for the week and you would've had no time to go out in between concerts.
eventually you doze off not realising you're in the air until you're ears pop waking you up to lia grinning mischievously.
"what asshole?"
"you're adorable when you wake up, you know that right?"
"yes i know."
"seriously the cutest human on the planet."
"what do you want lia?"
"a gossip podcast has picked up the subject of you and percy jackson. and the host is saying shit about you."
your eyes widen for a moment. "oh my god what? wow its almost as if i don't care!" ypu give lia a blank look. "this happens every three months lia, i do something and people either love it or hate it. thats the way it goes."
"yeah but this is PERCY JACKSON Y/N! he's gorgeousness personified."
"ugh can i go back to sleep? you can fangirl to me tomorrow when im in bed and pretending to listen."
"im offended." she leans over to place a kiss on your head. "but sleep tight babes, we land in like forty minutes."
shutting your eyes again you drift back to sleep.
only when you wake up do you realise you dreamed of percy...
TAGLIST‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ [if you're name is white it mean i couldn't tag you] @lauptimist, @itzmeme, @mariaaaaaahhhh, @paankhaleyaar, @maybxlle, @lara20aral, @cxp1d, @user-3113s-blog, @pleasingregulus, @avihashearts4lix, @inlovewithmorales, @brokecollegebitch, [if you want to be added just let me know!]
#percy x reader#percy jackson x you#percy jackson x reader#percy jackson x y/n#percy x y/n#percy x you#percy jackson#percy jackson fanfic#percy jackson fic#fanfic#fanfiction#emma writes ₊˚⊹⋆#percy x popstar au ₊ ⊹
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This is a tangent, I'm here to entertain with needless rambling
The deep rooted hatred for taco I see in the II community genuinely concerns me. Especially since those people tend to be Mephone "apologists"(For lack of a better word, I love Mephone don't get me wrong) despite how taco is the "active" side of the coin to his "passive". The connections between them are there trust me Im connecting the dots. Ive connected them.
I understand that she's done bad things, but blaming her for her shortcomings when she doesn't and never had the same support group to change as Mephone did makes me a little ehh.. Getting upset because Microphone showed her support in the new episodes simply because you don't like the ship(I understand why people wouldnt but thats not an excuse to deny her anything), and because Taco doesn't know how to change yet and you refuse to see her as anything redeemable. I'm not big on shipping, thats not the point of this tangent, but Taco finally having someone to support her and help her change is a GOOD thing. Microphone was being the bigger person there, she was being mature and thoughtful because Taco clearly needs the help. The fact that people continue to deny Taco any kind of growth even if she goes about it in the wrong way makes me deeply uncomfortable. Because the moment any character does anything bad that isn't HER they don't say anything about it. She was shunned by her peers because she was playing the game and continued to 'play the game' so to speak.
Theres a deep rooted hint of misogyny in the way they treat her, but I wont yap about that you dont need to read allat.
I understand people have reasons for not liking characters! That's ok. But I've seen them actively go out of their way to harass people that DO like Taco and actively criticize enjoying her character.
They tend to take it as defending her actions. Which is not what's happening. I don't think oscommunity could handle vriska is all I'm saying.
Feel free to not answer this I just need whatever little imp is telling me to scream about it to get out. go draw a taco dis is driving me crazy
Thank you for dumping this in my inbox bigbarf200, I feel like a wise confidant.
okay so I don't interact/observe with the wider ii community (Mainly cuz i like playing with my touys without being bothered) So this information is so Interesting to me!!!
As you mentioned, the hate might stem from misogyny (and by the way, I’d love to read your essay—talk all you want, my friend!). This is a societal issue that affects every part of life.
That said, I also think some people might dislike her simply because she’s a hustler and stubborn. When she has a goal, she’ll do whatever it takes to achieve it, even if it means crossing into morally gray areas.
holding Mepad hostage > hijacking the show
lying and deceiving objects with good intentions > winning s1
seriously hurting Fan > winning Mic immunity
as you said in the greater scheme of things, she's genuinely done horrible things. But if you just accept that at face value you are missing out on such an amazing character. You have to consider her perspective and the circumstances of her birth (especially in a story like ii!!) to fully understand and come to an option on her. But I digress this is baby level analysis so ill move on.
people who think Mic being friendly towards Taco post e14 is out of character are misunderstanding Microphone as both a character and thematic device I think
that's literally the only rational reason I could think of as to why people would be mad about taco and mic being on good terms???
so yeah, these haters just sound like crazy irrational people who have a lot of pent-up emotions. crazy
anyways ty!!! I feel like I didn't have alot to add since, as stated, these people are just incredibly irrational. but its nice getting an earful of whagh the fuck the community is like. here are soem taco drawings for the occasion
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Ocean eyes
Stepbrother au
Warnings: curses
mainly inspired by the Billie Eilish song ocean eyes🫢
Summary:You and rafe were step siblings, ever since your parents met they just had to be together. Rafe hated that though, so he ultimately hated you. He was mean, and always doing something to make everyone angry at him. Except you. You liked Rafe, even if he he was so mean sometimes for no reason you still remained sweet to him, the sweetest girl in fact, and that’s what annoyed Rafe the most. You clung to him always, especially when your parents were out, or away, like they were this weekend.
It was just you and rafe in the house, he sat in the living room, “Rafeyy!” I shout as I come down the stairs, as soon as I arrive in the living room I see Rafe’s blonde hair and broad shoulders as he slumps back to couch with a gruff look on his face as he watched the tv. "Shh! For fuck's sake, will you be quiet?" He muttered under his breath "Always fuckin' noisy..." he takes a swig of his beer, deliberately avoiding looking at you "What do you want, y/n?” I sit down next to him on the couch, our arms slightly touching which was seeking me more comfort than it should. “Just wanted to spend some time with my stepbrother, what are you watching?” He rolls his eyes as you sit next to him, his arm tensing as you get too close for comfort. "Last nights game, you're gonna sit here and stare at the tv with me?" He asks sarcastically, taking another swig of his beer. “Thats what i was planning on doing yeah.. if it bothers you just say so god..” I slightly roll my eyes, i never understood his attitude and why he was so cold all the time towards me. "I don't want you near," He snaps, his temper flaring. "Happy now?" He takes another swig of his beer, trying to drown out the fact that you're still sitting there acting all nice to him. “Fine, I.. I guess I’ll just go then..” i mutter as i stand up to leave with a disappointed look on my face, as i start heading to the kitchen.
A few moments pass, it feels so quiet but Rafe’s thoughts aren’t, he gets up from the couch, his feet carrying him to the kitchen despite his brain telling him not to. He leans against the doorframe, watching you as you grab some food. He hates how you always look so sad when he snaps at you.
As i rummage through the fridge and get some ingredients, i hear a slight creak causing me to turn around, and there he was, Rafe standing right in the door. “You need something?” I ask, i cant help but still be nice to him, this is one of the traits i hated about myself, my niceness. "No," He says gruffly, crossing his arms over his chest. "Just came to see what you were doing." He watches as you turn back to the fridge, his eyes trailing over your small figure. He quickly looks away, not wanting to get caught staring. “Well.. im gonna make your favorite so you better be hungry.” I turn around smiling up at him with all the food piled up in my hands, i quickly settle it down on the counter. “Im not hungry y/n..”he snaps, even Rafe didn’t know why he snapped at you, why was he so annoyed by your presence? What was even his issue? He walks further into the kitchen, leaning against the counter. "You're too fucking stubborn for your own good, you know that?" I look up at him. “Oh so im the jerk for caring for you or what?” I slightly raise my voice which usually never even happens, but this time he was acting really stubborn. “And what is that even supposed to mean?! Look at how YOU’RE acting right now..” I huff. "It means you don't take no for an answer, even when it's clearly what someone wants," His eyes trace your features, noting how the harsh kitchen light brings out the freckles across your nose. "Like right now." “I really don’t wanna play one of your games tonight Rafe, plus all this shit that you’re doing doesn’t affect me get that in your head.” I turn away from him refocusing on preparing the food, “Oh, it'll affect you," He says, his voice cold. "It'll affect you more than you realize." He reaches out, grabbing your chin and forcing you to look up at him. "You think you're so fucking tough, but you're not." He looks at me with his piercing cold ocean blue eyes, all i see is hatred. I realize im not tough, my eyes began to tear up and my throat goes dry i try to look away, pull away, but his grip is tight. He notices the tears welling up in your eyes and something inside him snaps. "Fuck," He curses, his grip on your chin tightening. "Don't cry, goddamn it." He pulls you into his chest, holding you tightly against him. I breathe in his rich woody cologne and the words “Im sorry..” spills out from my mouth. "Don't apologize," He murmurs, one hand moving to stroke your hair while the other keeps you firmly against his chest. His heart is racing, beating against your ear. "Stop... being so fucking sweet to me," He whispers, voice cracking slightly. "It makes everything... harder."
#fanfic#outer banks#obx#rafe obx#rafe x reader#outerbanks rafe#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron#rafe outer banks#rafe imagine#rafe x you#rafe fic#stepbro!rafe#obx season 4#obx fic#obx fanfiction#obx x reader#rafe smut
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yes im changing
paige bueckers x reader
(paige x uconn psychology student!reader)
synopsis: with y/n being in a new environment, still facing rejection, how can she bounce back?
masterlist
chap 4
y/n pov:
okay scratch that. i would have to do all athletes. okay new research:
a comparative research on the academic resilience of students and students part of the basketball team in the university of connecticut.
much better. i can have more focus on the people in my research. and plus, the basketball teams are the most known in uconn, which could make them have different perspectives. but first.. i would have to ask their coach first. i may ask aubrey if she can bring me to their coach, his name is coach geno..?
after their training (and an hour of peyton giggling), i went up to aubrey and told her about my research.
“yeah! i could definitely ask coach geno, he’s in the other room though to get his stuff, but he’ll come back soon” aubrey replied with enthusiasm. “thats great! thanks aubrey. i would also have to ask the men’s basketball coach, but ill check tomorrow since its already late” i mentioned. aubrey and i got to talk a little bit more, aubrey asking me why i was even in their training the first place.
i said that peyton’s crush is in the team, which made aubrey laugh. when we both looked behind to peyton, we see her talking to azzi. smooth ass..
coach geno finally got out of the other room, and aubrey introduced me to him.
“oh coach! this is y/n, and she has a small favor to ask” aubrey says. “hello coach geno! i am a freshman taking psychology, and i wanted to ask if i could have your team to be part of my research” i smiled.
“what’s it about?”
“their resistancy in regards to their school work sir”
“will it hinder their skills?”
“no sir”
“how long will this take?”
“maximum of a month i believe, but it still depends”
“as long as the team says yes and it wont be a distraction, then im all for it. goodluck y/n, and welcome to uconn!” coach geno replied with a small smile. “thank you sir! it means a lot” i smiled back.
i went back to peyton, who was talking to azzi, and introduced me to her. azzi then introduced me to the other players— to nika, kk, paige, and caroline. i guess i still needed a formal greeting even with the event that happened yesterday.
i then proceeded to ask the whole team about my research idea, and they were all willing to help me. just needed to contact the men’s basketball team now.
after small talks, we all headed back to our dorms. i feel better with the team already, they’re all quite playful, just have to ignore that one blonde, paige. we haven’t talked a word to each other, and i won’t mind if we don’t talk at all.
when we arrived to the dorms area, we all bid our goodbyes to some of the members and the others headed to the same dorm building as me. turns out that everyone that has the same dorm as me lives on the same floor as me.. this will be fun. my “floormates” are nika, ashlynn, ice, kk, and paige. azzi along with caroline and the others were at another dorm building.
we all bid our goodnights, and aubrey and i went inside our dorm. we both were too tired, and got unready and head to our beds quick.
“goodnight y/n!”
“goodnight aubs”
the next week
the last days were great. men’s basketball team is on board with my research, and my introduction and rrl is surprisingly done.
today, i will start to interview the women’s basketball team, and i am thinking of doing observations with them as well— like having group study sessions and know their behavior and thoughts.
its now 2pm, two hours before the team’s training, which gives me enough time to interview some people. i text aubrey saying that im near their court, and was asking who i can interview first.
aubrey: paige is free
goddamn it.
oh well, let’s just get this over with. i open the court’s entrance, the team seeing me and greeting me.
“so, who can go first?” i ask the team, i really didn’t want paige, she will just give me negative energy for the rest of the day. she is always so.. negative towards me.
“i dont think we can.. coach wants us to do 25 laps as penalty! but since paige wasn’t there when the team was goofing around.. she’s free” azzi explained. “what did you guys even do that made coach geno be in fumes?” i asked.
“teased coach about paige dating on of his children.. they’re our age though” aubrey steps in. “oh id send you guys to 25 laps as well” i joked. “whatever!” azzi says.
i told paige to come with me the the bleachers, still being nonchalant.
“so where do we begin..” i hummed. i could feel that paige felt awkward
“name?” i started.
“paige bueckers”
“year?”
“im a junior”
she’s 2 years older than me.
“current gpa?”
“3.9”
not bad.
“workloard in school?”
“atleast 5 worksheets and 2 tests per week”
“can you finish them on time?”
“depends”
“what’s your hardest subject?”
“chemistry”
“favorite subject?”
“anatomy”
“okay that’s all for now. we still have more interviews in the future, and a possible group study session with the others. thank you!” i tell paige.
“thanks” paige coldly replies.
after an interview with aubrey, azzi, and the others, i wrapped it up, just in time for them to do their own preps before training. i was looking for a water dispenser as i was thirsty. i passed by the locker room and heard a voice.
“what is she even doing here? can’t she do her studies somewhere else? we don’t need her bro” the voice stated, which i think was pertaining to me.
“paige, just be kind. its a freshman’s research, you know how tough some professors are with the freshmans, they would have to give their best” another voice replied back.
“whatever, let’s just get to practice” paige scoffs. i rolled by eyes and realized that it was my signal to go, i didn’t want them to see me. i quickly got my water and got out of the court, thanking coach geno and the other members who were just sitting on the bleachers.
as i walk, i start to feel discouraged. i just want to do what’s best for me, and a person who doesn’t know me just talks bad about what im doing. i guess i just have to suck it up, i have no time for negativity anyways. just focus on being able to transfer to stanford.
uconn, your star is not-so shining to me.
- zo’s notes: hello, i hope everyone is enjoying reading my fic :)
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Oh also further update on my experiences with the new oni dlc. Bionic dupes struggle in early game ceres a bit I think (their poor poor gears)
#rat rambles#oni posting#now the pro is that I dont think their defragmentation is interrupted by the cold so thats nice ig#but the main issues rly come in gunk freezing at ceres tempuratures and oil not being easily accessible early on#and while having the grinding gears debuff isn't necessarily the end of the world it is still rough and very much not ideal#and since preserving the cold of your starting biomes is super important in early ceres it leaves you with quite the predicament#now ofc there are other theoretical ways around that (primarily a vacumed tank or double liquid locking into a warmer biome)#but it very much continues the bionic dupe gameplay thing of them needing to shift your early game heavily to fit their needs#which is good btw! all of this Im saying is stuff I like! I like how bionic dupes shift the early game significantly#but yeah the real reason I think they have a slight disadvantage compared to normal dupes starting off is because they dont have access to#the frost proof trait which is Extremely nice to have early on when you can't start ranching for a few days#now the nice thing abt bionic dupes is that their starting perks can help jumpstart a lot of stuff you would have to wait or get lucky for#mainly being able to dig granite right off the bat is a godsend on ceres and being able to have someone who can ranch immediately is also#very very good and I imagine you could easily speedrun getting your ranches running if you play your cards right#now the downside is ofc that its still probably going to take a few days even in the best case scenario#the cold is still going to slow your work down and the research is going to take time plus theres yknow. other early game things too.#and a starting bionic dupe rancher isnt an ideal starting dupe in my opinion since its going to take a little while until they can do much#youd probably be better off getting multiple diggers or getting a normal dupe with the ranching 1 skill#that does actually lead me to another mild complaint abt bionic dupes tho which is that I rly wish their traits were more interesting#like normal dupes have so much random bullshit and if a duplicant can be constantly emitting radiation and light then just think abt what#sort of fucked up shit bionic dupes could be doing#or even just like more normal shit like them having more or less energy consumption rates or smth#I just think that theres a lot of variety missing in the actual bionic dupes themselves that makes it much less interesting to get new ones#theres less choices to be made with them and that makes me sad because weighing the variety in duplicant traits is part of what makes#getting new ones so fun to me especially when your put in a situation where a dupe that has a trait you really need has a terrible downside#I feel like with the traits currently no bionic dupe rly has that sort of situation going for them which is less interesting to me#like its rly fun to have duplicants that need light to sleep for example and having to go out of your way to accommodate for them#which isnt smth that any individual bionic dupe forces you to do#like you will need to accommodate bionic dupes as a whole if you have them but no single one has specific needs like that#which makes me sad! let them have annoying problems that you have to suck up and deal with because you desperately need another digger rn
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