#(I think) but when people keep calling him ugly im like ‘ugly where???’ i don’t even think he looks bad in the anime likejdnen

[aslfua-remade]

i know we r :/ about oushi but it’s so funny to me when some people r like ‘he’s so ugly’ lmao like stop lying, none of the characters in yubiren r ugly 😭

[vampirebloodie]

Little Help | Mark Hoffman x Reader

Summary: John makes Hoffman help you and he almost kills you (with pleasure)

Warning: NSFW Smut, creampie, degradation kink, puller hair

After having survived one of Jigsaw's tests after making some bad choices in life, John Kramer saw enormous potential in you due to your willpower to survive being different from anyone else tested, you had the strength of an apprentice, as well as Amanda and Lawrence. As you didn't have many things to lose, you easily accepted John's invitation to become one of his apprentices and help him with the next games, even though it was almost like signing other people's death warrants, you saw it as a job, you just don't receive any payment for it.

Amanda wasn't with you today at the factory, so it was just you who was putting together a new trap and John who was drawing some new models in a notebook. You had been making some mistakes for a few days now, which made him start keeping an eye on you to look for some good solution.

“I called Hoffman to give a little help for you. I see that you are having a lot of difficulties.”

John said, still drawing. You felt your heart stop for a few seconds after hearing that. You hated Hoffman just as he hated you too and you knew that very well, he made a point of always making it clear when you saw each other, which fortunately was rare.

"You what? Hoffman? Are you kidding me? What about Lawrence?”

Unlike Mark, Lawrence liked you and you liked him too, you always got along well and always helped each other.

“Lawrence has a family, and he's traveling with them. Amanda is not available, you stay with Hoffman, the end.”

He closed the subject there and you huffed in frustration, the hours there with the detective would be terrible.

.........

It was almost dusk, John had gone home to rest in his room while you had stayed to wait for Hoffman, sleep had consumed you and you soon dozed off on the table, only to be woken up by a loud knock on the table that almost made you have a heart attack.

“Finally! I thought that besides being stupid you were also deaf.”

You rubbed your eyes and looked up to see the devil, aka Mark, staring at you.

“Fuck you.”

“You can curse me later, cutie. We have a lot of work to do.”

He went to the other table where there was the trap that you needed to assemble but there was something wrong with the pieces, since every time you tried to fit it to your body it simply came apart and you had to do it all over again.

"Do it"

He handed the materials into your hand, but you didn't take them.

“How am i going to fix it if i don't know where im going wrong damn? i've tried several times.”

Mark took a deep breath and placed the tools on the table again, carefully picking up the trap.

“Don't be a stupid girl, just open your fucking arms.”

You ignored his rude manner and looked at him suspiciously, opening your arms, then you felt the trap being placed around your waist and your neck.

“Hey hey, what are you doing?”

You despaired for a few seconds thinking he was going to fix it and use it on you.

“I'm not going to kill you with that ugly thing you did. I need a model to be able to see the error. Unfortunately, i only have you.”

You ignored the offense and stayed quiet, he bent down a little in front of you and looked at the pieces, you held your breath when he looked at the part of your neck and ran his hand over it. You could swear he squeezed your neck on purpose.

"Thats it."

He spoke and took one of the tools, where he placed it near his neck and fixed the error that was in the support of the equipment. After that he released the trap again and removed it from his body, placing it on the table. You felt your neck tingle.

Mark ran his long fingers along your neck, where the metal had left a mark due to his grip, you tried to control your breathing when you realized how close your two faces were to each other. You looked at him again.

“Don’t look at me like that…”

"Like what?"

You tried to hide the sexual tension, turning your head, only to feel his hand pulling your face back to look at him, at his blue eyes.

“I know you don’t really hate me, do you think i don’t see you staring at me every day?”

“I stare at you and imagine myself killing you in various traps.”

You tried to finish the subject there and he laughed sarcastically.

“Oh sure. Do you know what i imagine when i look at you, Y/n?”

He got close to her ear and whispered:

“I imagine myself every day fucking that tight pussy of yours right on this table and you screaming my name.”

You closed your legs on impulse as soon as you heard that, only to see a smile appear on his face, he grabbed your hair from behind, giving a light tug making you let out a moan.

“Why don’t you make it a reality then, detective?”

"I will”

You felt his tongue invade your mouth with precision while his arms pinned you against the table, Mark held your waist and placed you sitting on the table, where this time he attacked your neck leaving some marks, your hand pulled his tie. Hoffman took off your blouse, squeezing your breasts and then removed your underwear, he took off his blazer and threw it in a random corner of the room and pushed you against the table, opening your legs, you shivered when you felt his fingers pass through your intimacy.

“You don’t know how many times i've thought of you in this position just for me.”

He squatted in front of you and removed your panties, leaving you completely exposed to him, before you could say anything you felt his tongue invading your pussy making you scream in surprise, his tongue worked so well inside you that made you roll your eyes with so much pleasure, Hoffman stuck two fingers inside you and started moving them while sucking your clit, you pulled his hair, you felt your stomach tighten.

“H-Hoffman, I...”

“No.”

He realized you were going to cum and pulled away, making you moan in frustration, he grabbed your neck and unzipped his pants, exposing his member, which made your eyes widen a little due to its large size, Mark positioned his member at your entrance and forced himself into you, the tip hitting your cervix, which made you squirm at the new sensation.

He placed both hands on your hips and began thrusting hard into you. Completely invading you with each blow. You grabbed his arms and moaned loudly. Hoffman pulled your hair and squeezed your neck, starting to choke you as the loud sound of your bodies crashing into each other filled the empty room. Your face started to turn red due to lack of air and he seemed to enjoy it.

“You look so perfect when im choking you, you fucking little slut!”

He said irritably and began to move even harder and released your neck, making you gasp for air quickly, Hoffman squeezed your waist tightly, which would probably leave marks later, the two of you moaned loudly and together. His fingers began to make quick movements on your clit, making you almost cry with pleasure.

“Be a good girl and cum for me while you scream my name, hm?”

“Yes, yes, yes, yes, fuck, Mark!!”

"Good girl!”

You screamed, cumming and feeling your legs weaken and shake, Mark grunted and soon you felt him coming apart inside you, you breathed for a few seconds before he came out inside you, watching the semen drip from your pussy, he licked his lips. Mark took you off the table and helped you get dressed again.

“It won’t change how much i hate you.”

You said and he laughed.

“Please remember to say this when i fuck you again .”

He gave two little slaps in your face and put his blazer back on.

“I'll give you a ride. Hurry up. Cmon"

You put on your boots and picked up your bag, walking alongside him, even though your legs still felt sticky to each other. God, what have you done?

[icystorm76]

Lauren’s commentary

I’m forcing my sister to watch IWTV and her commentary is genuinely hilarious. She accused me of posting her comments somewhere, then gave me permission to do exactly that. So here you go, her comments on episode 3. (She’s never read the books)

About Raglan James

“Is he a vampire? Is he Vampire ex boyfriend?(When asked why she thinks that) “He seems the type, you know? Like he would judge them then sleep with them.” (I reiterate that she’s never read the books, I guess Daniel just radiates vampire fucker vibes. She just guessed the completely wrong guy)

“Why is he trying to be on the phone? Is he actually one the phone? What is he doing? Oh shit, I missed something, rewind”

“Are you posting my commentary somewhere?” (I am now, lol)

“Hehehe, raglan”

“I can’t see what he’s writing! Milf? Is that what he wrote?”

In the library with Armand

“OH MY GOD HES FLOATING”

“Do you think he has nudes on that computer?”

“I know they’re vampires but does their architecture have to be so brutalist?”

“His bone structure is snatched. I hate his eyes though”

“Of course YOU do” (In response to me saying I like the eyes)

Paris (Armand’s narration)

“OH MY GOD, did he turn Lestat”

“So he’s into bondage?”

“There are laws?!”

“So he has fire powers”

“Hehe, you’re ugly and I hate you, fuck off and die abuser” (she’s not a big fan of Lestat)

“Boo, tomato tomato tomato!”

“The only thing I like about Lestat is his voice”

“Are all vampires gay?”

“Hehehe, the way he’s standing there.”

*Awful French accent* “LeSTOT!”

“Ah, so the abused becomes the abuser. You’re perpetuating bad stereotypes there”

“Oh god Lestat, I hate you. Where Louis?”

“Armand and Lestat, sitting in at tree A-b-u-s-i-n-g. First comes hitting, then comes throwing, then comes dropping Louis out of the sky!”

“Yep, still hate him”

“Oh he cray cray”

“You know what? I hate both these people and they deserve each other”

“Oh my god Lestat you messy bitch”

“Diabolical!!!”

“Ewww, get a room”

Paris (with Louis and Armand)

“Hell yeah, welcome back Pookie”

“I fucking hate him. How do you like these people?”

“How have they now been hatecrimed yet? Like come on guys! I’ve lost faith in Paris’s homophobia” (My sister is a lesbian btw)

“He can read your thoughts Buddy”

(When Lestat starts singing) “AH AH AH PAUSE IT *full body contortions as off possessed by Saten* I didn’t think it was possible to have a physical reaction to an Ick. Oh my god I had a full body reaction to that. I feel violated. I feel really and truly violated.”

“LeTHOT”

“OH MY GOD IM CHOKING. WHAT IS THAT ANGLE”

“No, because the images of Lestat looks like those cameras that make you look like you’re walking on a really tiny world”

“Why is this episode called No Pain. All they do is give each other pain”

“Pause it, no stop, rewind. You’re at a 10, I need it to not exist. LeTHOT, what are you doing? I’m so disappointed. I mean, I knew this was a show about the awareness of Stockholm syndrome, but I didn’t know it would this bad. Every day I walk outside and I think life is great then I come back inside and you make me watch tho shit. I need you to get your lips off of him. I don’t think I can continue”

“This using, love, OH, thank you, keep going, this is better than porn” (while Louis is murdering “Lestat”)

“OH, Real Rashid, by babe!”

“There’s so many files”

“They have a curfew?!”

“You mean the one where Lestat abused you? Because it kinda seems like Armand is going to do the same”

“They got that at home goods, didnt they?”

“Oh, wow. but Daniel’s not a Vampire, so he doesn’t count”

“Uh, wellllllllllllllll”

“Side note, I love that the vampires can’t age but you can tell Louis’ getting older because he parts his hair like a balding middle aged man”

“Thought that when they kissed that it would be like that scene in despicable me 2 when their noses bumped and stopped them from kissing”

[annimator]

I’m a week late to the party but OH MY GOD THE DC4 PREMIERE WAS FUCKING AMAZING

(Reaction’s under the cut as always)

• An abandoned Carnival is honestly an AMAZING setting for a reality show lets be real

• ofc this place has harsh weather and all that shit. also poor bird ;-;

• TREVEKKKKKK

• WAIT THEIR COTTON CANDY’S THE SAME COLOR AS THE TEAMS

• Also Derek & Trevor as a whole honestly hit different once you find out they’re based off of DC’s co-creators, who are also married to each other. They really created self-inserts of themselves, made them the hosts of the series, and decided “yo we should make them a couple lol”. im not complaining btw, I think it’s rlly cute :D

• THE WAY THEY LOOKED AT EACH OTHER BEFORE HOLDING HANDS AND MOVED CLOSER TO EACHOTHER OMG

• INTRO TIMEEEEEEE

• YOOOOOOOOO THE CONTESTANTS ALL LOOK SO GOOD AND INTRIGUING

• “Men often underestimate me. They think I’m all beauty and no brains, but when you have to fight this “male-dominated world”, you tend to learn a few tricks” QUEEN SHIT, I LOVE HOW THIS IS THE FIRST LINE WE GET FROM ANY CONTESTANT THIS SEASON

• I can’t take Ted’s monologue seriously considering how many L’s he took this episode lol

• I’m gonna be so hyped for anytime Hannah & Tristan appear on screen and there’s nothing y’all can do to stop me I LOVE THEM SM

• “People have a bad impression of actors on this show. I’m here to prove that Hollywood doesn’t turn you evil, and I’ll win the right way.” YEA YOU GO IVY

• “I don’t look diabolical. I look like the bloody nerd you shove in lockers.” You’re right Spencer lol. Also you’re totally gonna crush on Diego so hard this season, trust me bro

• Trevek casually holding hands throughout the episode implies that everyone knows they’re a couple and everyone’s completely chill with that. Them casually being a background relationship amongst all the chaos (pun intended) is honestly a great direction imo

• Derek calling this season a fresh start honestly feels like he’s talking to the viewers, which is understandable after having the OG casts from season 1 & 2 get their endings during the All Stars finale & the TomJake spinoff. I miss them sm ;-;

• The first challenge is making a shelter? What is this Pahkitew Island? /j

• Idk if anyone else caught this detail, but when Trevor threw the maps towards the contestants, Derek moved his head a little bit. That’s nice :D

• LOGAN’S A DORK, I LOVE HIM

• IF ALESSIO ENDS UP BEING FIRST BOOT YOU WILL SEE ME ON THE NEWS

Edit: god fucking damnit

• Also him observing a snail, only to crush it to see the color it creates is a mood. Everyone backing away from him afterwards is also funny as hell lol

• “Hi there! I’m Isabel. Nice to meet you :D” “Okay, if you don’t mind me asking, what’s a nun doing out here?” Ted said what the fandom was thinking when the cast photo dropped lmao

• Also their dynamic is already amazing. “His words won’t help us here, sister” is genuinely one of my favourite quotes from this episode

• Oooooo more looks into the contestants personal lives. I dig it >:D

• Idk why, but Richard fainting as blue team arrived to their campground was kinda hilarious to me

• ANARISSA INTERACTION WHO CHEERED

• “Military?” “Hopefully. You?” “Farthest from it. Model.” “Obviously. You’re very pretty.” I NEED TO BE SEDATED BRO

• “Whenever someone tells me not to do something, it means they’re usually keeping it for themselves.” Hard cut to Ted taking an L after ignoring Marissa’s warning

• Logan’s so pure omg. His bond with Richard’s rlly cute and I know damn well the fandom (myself included) is gonna BAWL when one of them ends up getting eliminated

• NATALIA’S SO STRONG WTF. QUEEN SHIT

• “I’ve noticed our team has more women than men.” “Ugh, thank god right?” mood

• Damn we already got alliances? This totally won’t backfire :>

• Lynda your family’s ugly lmao. Also she’s probably gonna be a villain

• “Where’s the italian fellow?” Nintendo whenever they need money

• Logan worrying that Alessio ditched them to look for the totem, only for it to cut to Alessio painting smth is such a funny cutaway

• “The early bonding doesn’t concern me. The deconstruction of civilization… hahahaho! Now that’s something that can be put to a canvas!” HE’S JUST LIKE ME FRFR

• HANNAH’S BEING BEST GIRL AS ALWAYS I LOVE HER

• Also there’s something really nice about Amelie casually implementing some french words into her dialogue. I think its really neat, and as someone that did take french, I’m able to understand most of it :D

• I’ve seen some people ship Hannah & Benji together, and although I do see where they’re coming from since they’re both asian, I honestly just see them as friends. TRISTANNAH ALL THE WAY BABYYYYYY

• “I’m all about giving good head.” BENJI-

• I GENUINELY WAS NOT EXPECTING HIM TO SAY THAT OH MY GOD HE’S SUCH A BOYFAILURE I LOVE HIM

• DIEGO HELPING OUT SPENCER AFTER THE BEAM FELL ON HIM, AND ASKING IF HE’S OKAY? OMG THE SHIPPING CRUMBS

• ZAIVY CRUMBS LETS GO

• TRISTAN, ZAID, & IVY ARE GONNA BE AN ICONIC TRIO I CAN SEE IT FROM A MILE AWAY. Also them talking about designing the shelter was really nice :D

• “Ooh! Quite the mind reader, isn’t he?” “Oh, thanks! Though… I’m actually non-binary” THEY SAID IT. IT’S FULLY CONFIRMED AND STATED IN THE SHOW LETS GOOOOOO

• AND THE SCENE IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING WHERE IVY EDUCATING ZAID ABOUT THE TERM AND HIM BEING CHILL ABOUT IT? OH MY GOD THIS SCENE IS LITERALLY EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED AS A NON-BINARY PERSON

• Ivy’s confessional following this and her backstory’s honestly my favourite so far. She’s definitely a parallel to Riya since she doesn’t want the game (or hollywood for that matter) to change who she was. We all know that the same didn’t happen with Riya anyways

• “The industry is so competitive and nasty, it’s easy to look over the genuine people in your life” I immediately thought of Riya when I first saw this scene considering what happened between her, most of the friends she made during DC, and ESPECIALLY Connor

• IVY’S A THEATRE KID I LOVE HER. Also she joined to prove she can do stuff without her parents help is honestly some great motivation imo

• HANNAHHHHHHH

• Also Amelie slays so hard. Her design’s really growing on me

• ONE OF THE RATINGS FOR AMELIE’S COMPANY SAYS “INSTANT CHOICE EVERYTIME I GET MARRIED” LMAOOOOO

• Alessio getting distracted by a butterfly is mood (said butterfly gave me kirby & qsmp flashbacks, but that’s not important rn)

• I was not expecting Natalia & Isabel to have a friendship even before the trailers & the intro dropped, BUT I LOVE IT SMMMM

• Ted takes an L part 2: electric boogaloo

• Diego wants Spencer so bad. DID YOU HAVE TO RAISE AN EYEBROW BRO? JADE KNOWS WHERE THIS IS GOING BY THAT SMUG LOOK ON HER FACE

• BENJI HOW DID YOU LIGHT YOUR ASS ON FIRE LMAOOOOO

• TREVEK CAME ONTO SCREEN HOLDING HANDS I LOVE THEM

• Emily :D

• “She’s so mother!” “Oh, wow! I didn’t know she was your mom!” THIS EPISODE HAD SO MANY FUNNY QUOTES I LOVE IT

• Aw, Trevor & Emily’s friendship’s healing :D

• Emily looks like she didn’t sign up for this shit lmao

• “I just thought it could use a theme!” “The theme being?” “Building new families” TRISTAN ILY

• How the fuck does Tristan sleep criss-cross applesauce

• “Why don’t you lay off, housewife?” DAMNNNNNN

• THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTINGGGGGGGGGG

• I just realized the guy promoting the patreon and reminding the viewer to subscribe is Connor’s VA lol

• “Over here we have the Demansplainer!” “Kind of a dumb name…” “Why do you think it’s abandoned?” lmao

• WAIT TREVEK’S DEMONSTRATING THE CHALLENGE TOGETHER? THATS AWESOME

• ALSO DEREK HOLDING ONTO TREVOR, AND TREVOR GETTING WORRIED FOR DEREK AFTER NOTICING HE LOOKS LIKE HES GONNA THROW UP WAS ADORABLE

• “Can I hold onto you?” “Can you—? What? The coaster’s already holding you!” “Please?” “…Fine.” AWWWWWWW

• Isabel praying the our father while the coaster’s rising is a mood and honestly relatable for people with a fear of roller coasters

• “Woohoo! Yeah! Who’s hyped?” HANNAH IS SUCH A RAY OF SUNSHINE AND I LOVE HER FOR THAT. ALSO LOOK AT HOW TRISTAN’S LOOKING AT HER WITH A SMILE ON THEIR FACE

• Richard forgor lol. Also Alessio just casually lounging like a bored student is a mood. I KNOW I KEEP BRINGING THAT WORD UP WHENEVER I TALK ABOUT ALESSIO, BUT HE’S LITERALLY VIBING BRO. I LOVE HIM

• Also animation’s been kicked up a notch compared to older seasons. All those greetings really paid well! Especially the double ones considering most of them have TomJake kissing lol

• DIENCER’S HOLDING HANDS ON THEIR WAY DOWN THE COASTER

• I love how Anastasia & Alessio are completely unphased by the roller coaster drop lol

• “Thanks to Crocoidile Dundee, I couldn’t see the godamn flags. NOT TO MENTION HE RUINED MY VEST!” LMAO

• Everyone mostly struggling with the flag order reminds me of the All Stars challenge where literally everyone besides Grett (And technically Jake & Ally since they were fighting each other instead of doing the challenge lol) were struggling with a fuckass 9-piece puzzle lmao

• Spencer over here thinking he’s a smartass and taking an L for the team lol

• Zaid & Ivy heading back onto the ride, this counts as Zaivy crumbs trust me bro

• Damn red team wins twice in a row? Noice. Also If ya want my opinion on which team I like the most, I honestly think they’re BOTH great since red team has Tristan & Hannah (they share the title of being my favourite contestants for this season), and blue team has Isabel, Natalia, & Alessio (they’re all close seconds) also they have pink n’ green yuri

• THE POSE DIEGO MAKES ON HIS SLEEPING BAG???

• ALSO FIRST TRISTANNAH INTERACTION LETS FUCKING GOOOO

• Jade & Spencer alliance pog. Diego’s probably gonna join in, and this alliance’ll end up in shambles or is gonna prosper, AND I’M ALL HERE FOR IT >:D

• ANARISSA SITTING TOGETHER >:D ALSO ANASTASIA TRYING TO LOOK COOL INFRONT OF MARISSA. GIRL I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE

• “Even if I dedicate my life to the Lord, I dedicate my body to the algorithm” God tier quote tbh

• “Oh! No…. My parents aren’t catholic” PLOT TWIST

• Seeing all the teams huddled around each other as they read the letter reminded me that A) both teams are equally great in my opinion, and B) I LOVE ALL OF THESE CHARACTERS, I DON’T WANNA SEE ANY OF THEM GET ELIMINATED WHAT THE FUCK-

• “I nominate Isabel!” “Why her?” “Bitch, look at her! She’s our team’s Mother Theresa” NATALIA ILY

• “Yass! Feed the children” THERE ARE SO MUCH GREAT QUOTES FROM THIS EPISODE

• “Go down the path together to a private booth. You’re both about to make a major decision” THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN. AND THE FUCK IS THE PERSON/THING IN THE TREE

• “After everything, people are probably still thinking, ‘What’s a nun doing here? How is she gonna lie or backstab anyone?’ Well I’m here to win a million dollars! And when it’s all over… I’ll pray for forgiveness” SLAYYYYY

• WAIT THAT’S IT? IM NOT EVEN UPSET, ISABEL’S CONFESSION WAS HONESTLY A GREAT WAY TO END THE EPISODE

• ANYWAYS YEA. THIS IS GONNA BE A GREAT SEASON, AND I’M NOT JUST SAYING THAT BECAUSE OF TRISTAN & HANNAH SLAYING, AND ALL THE SHIPPING CONTENT

[osarina]

(uh, this is rlly long im so sorry qwq)

OMG THAT LAST CHAPTER HAD ME FEELING SM CARINA U CANT DO THIS TO ME !!!! LITERALLY THE FIRST FEW PARAGRAPHS IN I HADTA WALK AROUND BC I WAS SO OVERWHELMED I LOVED IT SM !!! N THOSE LAST FEW LINES. DONTDOTHISTOME I S A W THE "BEAST AU COMPLIANT" TAG ON UU IM GONNA SOB MY EYES OUT DURING IT I JUST KNOW !!!

gonna leave some of my fave few lines n my thoughts abt them from this chapter (ok these arent all of em, bc if i put all of em it'd be the whole 50k words of this series SO ITS JUST THIS CHAPTER)

"because how could he possibly belong amongst people who are so unfailingly good that it makes his tainted heart stick out like a sore thumb?"

STOP NO DONT DO THIS TO MEEEEEE throughout the whole fic u perfectly captured his thought process n how he denies his own capacity for change n how he HAS changed from when he was 18 BUT THIS LINE MADE ME TEAR UPPPPPP

"He is so completely and irrevocably in love with you that Dazai doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to live in a world without you. The thought alone makes his skin crawl and his chest cave in."

self-explanatory

“Are you calling me ugly?” 

u gorgeous, gorgeous man ilysm yes you look like a rat but i'll swaddle u up in blankets n clean u up

the whole graveyard scene. DO YOU WANT ME TO CRY HELLO

“You were a kid, Osamu. You’re not some incarnate of evil for ending up where you did, you were failed by all of the adults in your life,”

ok nvm crying this hit me like a truck

"Humans cannot live without a heart, so if he’s to give you his, it’s only fair that you give him your own—though realistically, yours has already been his for a long time."

i feel like this mightve been ur fave line, but if it wasnt IT STILL IS MINE BC OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD QWQ

ranpos lil rant was so funny he's literally me frfr

“Yeah… ha, look at us, in jail at the same time! Couple goals, huh?” 

i giggled

PLS READER INVITING EVERYONE JUST TO AVOID GETTING INTERROGATED UMMM RELATABLE LMFAO

these are just some of them BUT JUST IN GENERAL, UR WRITING IS JUST MAGICAL ITS EVERYTHING IVE EVER WANTED TO READ N I LOVELOVELOVEEEE THIS SERIES N ALL UR WORKS (n u /p) SM !!! I CANT WAIT FOR UNREAL UNEARTH, I JUST KNOW IT'LL BE AMAZING !!!

RED HOW MANY TIMES MUST I TELL YOU NOT TO APOLOGIZE I LITERALLY ADORE YOU IM GOING TO WEEP OMG

honestly the first scene of dazai’s pov was one of my favs to write because it pisses me off so much whenever he’s excluded from the ada panels in the manga fjsjdjsjjd so i NEEDED the opportunity to hit home that that is his FAMILY idc what asagiri says the ada is that boys family and he deserves it 🥹🤞

UGHHHHH STOP BECAUSE WHENEVER I WRITE CANONZAI ITS SO HARD TO KEEP ON THAT THIN LINE OF HIS INABILITY TO ACCEPT HIS OWN GROWTH WHILE ALSO HAVING HIM ACKNOWLEDGING ODA’S LAST WISH FOR HIM SO I REWROTE SO MANY OF HIS POVS SEVERAL TIMES BECAUSE I FELT LIKE I WASNT GRASPING IT ALL PROPERLY

the graveyard scene was one of the 3 scenes i started writing for 🥹 i literally was weeping when i finally got to it

AND ALSO THE YOU WERE A KID LINE UGHHHHHHHH BRO when i tell you that’s something that i literally want to scream at him and shake his shoulders like he was FOURTEEN WHEN MORI BROUGHT HIM IN AFTER HIS ATTEMPT !!!!! FOURTEEN !!!!! HE WAS A BABY IT MAKES ME SO SAD WHEN HE FRAMES HIMSELF AS SOME IRREDEEMABLE MONSTER WHEN HE ONLY TURNED OUT THE WAY HE DID BECAUSE HE HAD NO ADULTS IN HIS LIFE SETTING HIM ON THE RIGHT TRACK ugh im gonna weep again i will always be dazai’s #1 defender, i will fight him himself idc he was only a lil baby :’)

oh my god fun fact i actually almost deleted that line about the heart, i don’t even know why like i was rereading it right before i post and i second guessed myself because i was like ‘i don’t think it rlly flows’ but then i decided against removing it because i liked the line in general SO IM WEEPING AGAIB

bro ranpo needs a promotion for real the headaches this man must get because of people not listening to him 💀

HDOSJDJSJDJJD THE COUPLES GOAL LINE WHEN I TELL YOU I SNORTED WRITING IT HELPPPPP I WAS GIGGLING SO HARD

RED ILYSM IM BUNDLING YOU IN THE SOFTEST BLANKETS AND GIVING YOU A FOREHEAD KISS

i’m so excited for unreal unearth like honestly it’s my pride and joy, i’m so pleased with how my beast!dazai characterization has come out so far and i’m hoping everyone else is going to like it too 🥹 if not ill simply die HAHAH JK JK JK no but really i’m so very excited for it

[onstoryladders]

Kang was such an asshole for half the episode. Like I know his father is fighting for his life but that’s no an excuse to treat his boyfriend (who didn’t do anything) like shit. I don’t like sex work shaming and that’s what it felt like. Im surprised but glad Kang actually showed up when Sailom called him. Now he needs to be a supportive boyfriend to sailom cuz he deserves it.

He acted like a self-centered prick throughout the whole thing... which on one hand, okay, fine, you're in a very complicated mental space, your father got badly hurt and there's a chance he will not survive, so you regress to your default-mode when it comes to dealing with difficult shit, yadda yadda; on the other hand, WHAT A DICK!

Sailom has been by his side the whole time. He's seen him at his worst and didn't leave. Kang hurt his friends and tired to ruin his life and he forgave him. Then Sailom's BROTHER does something bad and he turns his back on him?

What really got me thinking, though, was the scene where Kang told his grandma that "poor people would do anything for money", which... HELLO? That was painful to hear when we've seen Sailom putting others' needs above his own since the beginning. Sailom would never hurt others, not even if it meant he could change his situation: he only ever hurts himself. Not only that, but I feel like the narrative itself has been putting Kang at the center and brushing aside Sailom's issues, and now that they're rearing their ugly head again, I'm curious to see what will come of it.

I liked the last scene of the episode because I live for the drama and that was full of emotions, but I have contradictory feelings about it. What Kang did to Sailom was humiliating. Sailom just got through a very traumatic experience, and here Kang is, screaming at him, shoving money in his face, shaming him for something he doesn't and will never understand. Because Kang doesn't know shit about what it means to be poor. He doesn't know what it feels to have no safety net to catch you when you fall, to be alone in the world, without family to help you and too much pride to get help anywhere else. And I hope they will address this in the next episode.

Sailom has never asked Kang for anything. He worked for everything he received from Kang's family, and when Kang offered to pay off his debts he refused, because he didn't wanna be a burden. On a side note, that whole scene felt so weird to me, because it showed the disconnect between their worlds: Sailom has risked his life more than once because of his debts; and as awful Kang's situation with his dad can be, he's got a system, he's got money, he's safe and comfortable and has a lovely grandma who adores him, so it was weird to hear Sailom say that he doesn't wanna get in the way of his dreams.

What about YOUR dreams, Sailom?

The world keeps failing him, and he keeps forgiving. For once I just want him to get mad at it instead.

[dhaaruni]

is it just me or do white women get blamed a lot more for shit (on the left) than white men do? and i’m saying this as a black woman. i just had to scroll past a video where this white woman was like ‘more and more im starting to understand trump’ (which is, of course, insane and understandably made ppl upset) but then some white dudes in the comments were like ‘white women age terribly’ (which…what the fuck does that have to do with anything the white girl said about trump?) and someone called him out for the misogyny of it all and said ‘white men got critiqued, it’s time white women got critiqued as well’. and the comments were full of ppl (even other white women) being like ‘white women are the worst’, which is like. fine, some white women do deserve critique for their beliefs and values and the way they perpetuate racism, especially from women of color, but i can’t help but side-eye the people that do this all the time as if it’s ONLY white women that do so. like, did we forget that white men are also a problem?

i feel insane for even pointing it out but i even get uncomfortable with the way some moc talk about white women…idk it’s like they think that adding the word ‘white’ in front of women will shield them from misogyny allegations, as if misogyny is acceptable as long as it’s toward the correct target. i keep quiet about it because i don’t wanna get called a pick me or a traitor or anything but goodness! and it’s never done in good faith! i fucking hate seeing smug leftist white men get on their high horses and make videos about ‘the issues with white women’!

No you're completely right, I feel that way sometimes too.

I think that condemning white women for like, aging badly or other factors they can't control is easier than actually calling out racism or misogyny on an institutional level. You aren't doing a feminism by calling women ugly, regardless of their race!

I literally saw someone on Twitter call a Black woman a Karen the other day for side-eying Ron DeSantis like really? Can they hear themselves? It's actually totally justified to side-eye Ron DeSantis showing up at a majority Black event for hurricane disaster relief and espousing platitudes about racism when he personally said slavery was a good thing (even while the actual Florida history curriculum didn't go nearly that far). The word Karen simply has lost all meaning and if someone is using it unironically, I'm just assuming they hate women now because clearly it has nothing to do with racism anymore and is solely about like, unfuckable women existing in public and having opinions, which I'm not here for at all.

[whore4jasontodd]

Joseph Morgan smut

I never really see any Joseph Morgan smut so why not make some ~btw I’m not the best at this so bare with me

*third person pov*

Y/n and Joseph have been a little distant lately where he still has to finish filming the originals

It hasn’t really been the best for y/n her instagram comments are full of fat jokes

Why? Bcuz everyone is jealous of her relationship with Joseph everyone was still stuck on the one ship in the vampire diaries klaroline

Did it hurt her a little? Yes ofc she loves Joseph with everything in her

*y/ns pov*

Im laying in bed like usual waiting for Joseph to get back from filming it’s currently 10:00 am I decent to go on instagram knowing it’s not the best decision ex specially with all of the hate knowing I’m going to start getting insecure again and oh boy was I right

Hundreds of comments calling me fat,ugly, people saying Joseph deserves better, or that I’m to young for him I am 25 yes that’s a 16 year age gap but if he doesn’t have a problem with it should It really matter

Everyone truly believes I’m just after him bcuz he’s famous no he came to me at a time when I needed someone and I fell inlove with him

As I finish reading the comments I feel tears feel up my eyes i figured it’s better if I turned off my phone and layed down so that’s what I did and soon dosed off

It was around 11:00 when I heard the door open I knew he was home but tried to fall back to sleep but after a few minutes I feel the other side of the bed dip and arms wrap around me

Y/n luv are you awake? I hear his soft British accent echo in my ears I soon feel his hand slowly come to my face rubbing my dried tears

“Luv I know your awake I can tell when your faking you know” he says in a soft tone

I slowly open my eyes to see Joseph already looking at me

“Why have you been crying sweetheart”he says sounding concerned

Just stuff but I’m glad your home” I sigh cuddling into his arms

It’s the comments again isn’t it? I didn’t answer him but I knew he could feel me nod into his chest

“My sweet girl don’t listen to then your nothing of those thing they say , you are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, you are the one I love” his voice spoke soft and sounded so innocent

“Joseph?”

“Yes my luv”

“Do you think I’m too young for you or not good enough?” I spoke quietly

“Of course not I wouldn’t be here right now if I truly believed what any of them said” his words followed a kiss connecting to my forehead

“And if you don’t believe my words then let ne show you princess” his lips soon connected to my lips

Our tongues slide together his hands going to the side of my face pulling me closer

He soon pulls me over onto his lap

His hands go down to my hips gripping them pushing me down on his lap

I can feel him poking me through his sweats as his hands much there way up my shirt taking it off and unclipping my bra

After he gets my top half fully undressed he flips us over so he’s hovering over me

“Ahh what a beautiful site” he says but doesn’t sound very innocent anymore

His mouth connects to my breast, his tongue swirling around my nipple

I could feel his hands going down to my pants slowly sliding them down and off my ankle leaving me in nothing but my thong

“I think these will have to go luv” he spoke hooking his fingers around them taking them off like he did with my pants

As he hovers over me his eyes scan my body I soon start remembering all of the comments making me feel like I’m fat I put my over my stomach but he jerks up back up above my head

“Ahh what do you think your doing sweetheart?”

“Uh-nothing” I spoke out shyly

“That’s what I thought now be a good girl and keep your hands up there tonight is about you” his lips connect to my neck making there way down farther and farther until they make it to where I need him most

He slowly spreads my legs placing his lips on mine ;)

“ I can’t believe this is all mine” he started off with sticking one digit in but it soon turns into two

At this point I’m a moaning mess his mouth lapping me at clit like its his last meal and his fingers pumping in and out of me I feel my stomach tighten I know I’m close

“So tight and wet for me are you close yet my luv”

I couldn’t even get out an yes without screaming as I came around his fingers

As I’m a panting mess he makes me look him in the eyes as he kisses me lining his self up with me he asks

“Is this okay sweetheart”

“ god yes please I need you” I didn’t have to say that twice before he started pounding in and out of me

I throw my head back my back arching digging my nails into his back and every thrust made me moan louder and louder as I got closer

“Fuck luv so tight who’s pussy is this”

I couldn’t anwser the pleasure slowly took over my body

“I said who’s pussy is this” he grunts out

“All yours it’s all yours daddy” I scream out

“Good girl”

That was enough for me I came all over his cock

He falls down in the bed beside me

“God that was amazing”

“Fuck yeah” I saw cuddling into his chest

As I close my eyes I realize I haven’t took my birth control and he didnt pull out

“Omg Joseph”

“What’s wrong?” He jumps up worried

“You didnt pull out”

“Aren’t you off birth control”

“No Joseph we talked about it I thought we both agreed I was gonna stop taking it for a while”

“So you could get pregnant?” He asks as he starts to smile

“Yeah” I sigh

“ you don’t want to have a kid?”

“Ofc I want to have a kids but what if you don’t and you leave?” I spoke quietly

“I want to start a family with you more the anything princess” he says raising up kissing me

[corrodedcoughin]

Omg thanks to your "Eddie throws himself a funeral party" post I literally cannot stop thinking about Stripper! Steve. (absolutely no pressure to do anything with this btw! I'm just aaaa! at your idea)

Like omg. Did Steve get into stripping bc he got cut off and disowned by his parents and desperately needed any job that would take him? Did he seek the job out bc he thought it'd be fun? Why should he be ashamed of exercising, entertaining, looking hot, dancing, and then getting paid to do it??? Fuck yeah

Side note the image of best friend Robin stealing a pair of Steves clean tearaway pants bc she wants to know what it's like to rip them off is very funny to me. She has them on over her jeans. She's had a glass or two of wine and is standing in the middle of Steve's living room awkwardly trying to rip off a pair of tearaway pants that are far too big for her

AHAHHA!!! Please come join me!!! There’s enough stripper Steve for everyone! Funny story Robin actually got the call handler job first through a college friend but obviously platonic soul mates cannot be separated so Steve applied for a job there too. He wasn’t fussy about position, just handed his CV in and hoped he’d get to keep working with Robin.

The employers took one look at Steve when he came into the office and told him he has hired. As a stripper. He took a moment to adjust but thought if it means he gets to work with Robin, he’d do it. (That’s what he tells people, the truth is the ego stroke at the immediate job offer was enough to sway him. He thought it would be a fun job and he was tired of retail).

And Robin plays with ALL the stock! She’s got horrendously ugly nipple tassels that she stuck to Steve’s chest and they both ended up almost crying trying to take them off him without waxing his chest (Robin tears might have been from laughter shhhh). She’s got a feather boa that she loves and wears in the office because she feels it gives her a ‘better phone voice’ nobody’s argued with her yet.

As soon as Steve finished any gig he’s on the phone to her, giving her the run down of any drama or funny stories. She gets a little worried when she doesn’t hear back after the Munson party, tries to call the person who booked and gets Eddie on the phone ‘hello, Eddie’s fun funeral, Gareth speaking’ and Robin thinks she must have the wrong number, she must have written something down wrong but all her records tell her she’s right???

‘Hi. Um…im sorry, this is going to sound so insensitive and im so sorry but…did you hire a male stripper for your event?’ Robin is smacking herself in the face as she says it. Knows she’s going to get in trouble from her manager

‘Sure is! Can’t spell funeral without fun! He’s a little busy with the man of the hour though’ she can hear laughter and loud music through the receiver. Steve is stripping at a funeral, for the dead guy?

‘Ummm I’m sorry but I don’t think company policy allows for stripping for corpses. I’m going to have to refund your booking. Please send Steve back’ Robin is way out of her depth. What the fuck is going on? How did she let this happen?

‘Ah no dude he’s alive, very alive by the looks of things. And sos your employee. I dont know who’s having a better time to be honest’ Gareth sounds sane but Robin doesn’t know if she can really make that call over the phone for a guy who books strippers for funerals where people aren’t dead.

[analogwriting]

ok I feel a bit weird sending in another message today, but the newest chapters put me in such a killer mood I wanted to read more for him

and I must say??? We need more killer writers pls 😔 I love oneshots, hcs, all that stuff, but where are my longfics??? not to complain (i am), but WHERE IS THE SLOWBURN??

ambrose you are a godsend fr fr… I get so picky with this kind of thing because sometimes i’ll say “Oh I don’t like slowburn THAT much” but the moment I find a good slowburn, I will eat that shit up. I will be HOOKED on my phone for hours at a time and let my work pile up because yeah, these fics have me forgetting I need to sleep

Wish I could give you all the kisses in the world because you really just spoil us with ur amazing writing… ive never felt so blessed by an author before cuz the way the slowburn is so agonizing it has me ripping apart my lungs, my heart aching, myself going insane… I live for it.

Respect to you and other slowburn authors, cuz it takes a lot of work to write one… I always find other law or killer fics and the relationships always feel so rushed 😔 please, law and killer are such slowburn potential characters and i hate to see them act so impulsive in other works. I love how u write tho. So so so much. everything is so slow and i love it

(one day I’ll get to reading your law fanfic…hopefully this weekend)

anyways, me 🤝 number 1 kese hater, next chapters are rlly gonna get me 😭

-long rants anon

first of all, don't feel weird. I love getting asks, replies, or anything. no matter how many times. I eat that shit UP ✋✋

second, FKSKFKEKOD???? got me ugly crying on main frfr with this ask. i literally called my bsf crying 💀 you're so fucking sweet??? im just a funky little guy that had a few dreams and decided to write em out bc fuck it and to know that people are enjoying it that much is so insane to me 😭😭😭

im a sucker for slowburn and would eat that shit for breakfast lunch and dinner if I could. i just never really found it of my favorite characters so i was like "dammit if i want this shit gonna have to make it myself ig" i always felt like the law stories kinda happened to fast as well and i wanted some PINING. and then when I started my killer fic, there was hardly any killer content in general. there seems to be a surge in content for him tho which I am forever excited about my mans deserves it.

like the last time I wrote fanfiction it was a decade ago when I was first starting off high school. (not counting rps n shit with friends that continued forever)

never in a million years did i know people would enjoy it as much as they are and that shit makes me so unbelievably happy. like y'all have no idea. when i say i be giggling and kicking my feet n shit I MEAN IT

like this is me every time I get y'all's comments n shit. like I be giggling and just glowing all day. (it's partially why I just kept the trend of posting updates at night so I can wake up to them nice messages 💅 start the day off RIGHT)

like my head is reeling from this ask and im on cloud nine frfr. you are so fucking sweet and i just want to tuck you in my pocket and keep you safe. like FJSKDKDKS I'm going to be thinking about this all day and probably the rest of the week if not forever 😭😭😭

but seriously, from the bottom of my soul, thank you for this. shit makes my year frfr. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[velvetporcelain]

every time I’m alone I feel like a greedy greedy girl

every time I’m alone, I think I’m so cool. it girl. the girl you always want to be around alone. yes, girls too. 💅

fuck em. let’s get fine on em.

im like the once in a lifetime girl. Like sex wouldn’t be causal it would be soulful. It would be the best fuck of your life. It would be like you always dreamed it. Deep. Intense. Connection. Passion. I like to think I’d fuck your soul. — that’s what I think when I’m alone.

ha. I love myself so much. But what I find sexiest is my point of view.

yeah, im difficult- —- —-for weak people, yeah. Only a mind bigger and stronger can find me as their cute toy thing. Flopping my mind around like it’s nothing.

I don’t even think I’ve had enough world exposure to even shape myself, if I’m honest. I’ve had no real feedback about myself. But the feedback doesn’t matter anyways, it’s just about mind games and manners when in public, when plugged in.

nah, I’m thriving. no instagram. violently happy. violently in love with myself. I’m too delicate for exposure, and I accept that. Hence my greediness of self. I don’t know, I try not to think about it, nothing matters.

I fucked myself in the shower today. my husband says I’ve been distant. It is only because he married a women who knows how to pleasure yourself. I do not need him, I want him. But yes, lately I haven’t really wanted him, I’ve only wanted myself. Guaranteed satisfaction, guaranteed orgasms. Im still trying to figure out if I’m attracted to men like him, so I know the answers to that lay within myself. He’s so fucking complicated and I’m frustrated, sexually frustrated on top of that. I gave him too much of me before I had myself. All this is rushing from my brain, such an interpersonal mess.

I refuse to bear the cross any longer. I am surprised that I am not dead yet, and what I mean is in a vegetative state of mind, zombie. The stimulation of life keeps me alive I think.

soul searching is real. It’s horrid and closely resembles hell. i embrace my ugliness for what it is. my memories remain my demons. You can’t kill something in your head when you don’t know when it’s coming. Something triggers a memory and our brain knows no different and thinks it’s happening again, why? 😂 something that seems like we have no control over. A hanging on in quiet desperation kind of way. Wishing when you thought of something good, your brain would catch on but it doesn’t, and you feel stuck, only because you’re meant to grow, and not escape, but bloom. Turning tragedy into truth. This process is called life.

And i think our spirits can speak to each other, one of the lost abilities of the human race. where does personality come into play? If I’m not attracted to a personality, where do i get the lust and passion to fuck him?? Is sex much more than portrayed to be? Sex. Sacred energy exchange. So if we make out at the stove? That’s sex to me. Am I splitting hairs? I mean, seriously, what if we have been wrong about sex? What is the point of people devoting their lives of you think that the only thing sex men’s is penetration? Nooo, you want it in increments all day long. Or wait? Is that just me again? I always think i know what people want!! Toxic trait? Maybe.

Maybe if i just shut the fuck up for one second i could fuck.

-x

[dahliasanddimples]

Day 4 and I’m so glad I went to work yesterday. Was gonna call out bc I just did not mentally feel ready to be that social. Like at all but im sooooo glad I did. I don’t miss him anymore. Maybe bc I know he’s a bum. The thing about dating that most people forget is getting to know someone and realizing whether they are or are not for you.

Side note this guy I used to talk to has been on my mind lately which usually means they’re thinking about me heavy. He was a MAJOR fucking weirdo. Like I think he bugged my house weirdo. Like obsessed with me weirdo. Like fucking nosey weirdo like if weird x10 had a weird it would be him. If someone wrote an ICK story about guys they used to talk to.. it would be him. Like I steer clear from him bc I was just WAY out of his league. He did not know what to do with a bad bitch. And he’s literally the reason why I will never date for personality again idc. All ugly guys are nice and they don’t know what to do with a bad bitch. He was actually in love after like one month. And he was literally so fucking boring. He would talk about what we did that day from start to finish. He would talk about what he ate how he made it with what ingredients how he went to the store omg like get a fucking life. Like he actually didn’t have one. He didn’t have a hobby he didn’t… whatever. All this to say he was a major fucking regret and overall worst ICK of my life. And I’ve made some pretty regrettable decisions.

Anyways. I realize from the outside looking in he seems like THAT GUY but when I got to know him he was pretty much a bum. Didn’t have a real job, used his whatever you wanna call it to basically not necessarily free load from friends but yeah basically. Like used his popularity to get free things and didn’t really reciprocate. Not even the energy. Like the more I think about it it’s like, if it’s beneficial to him then yes but pretty much he was a bum. Had no drive to do better for himself, didn’t want more from his life, didn’t have a dream career just overall was comfortable with where he was at. When I first met him he said he was in corporate doing finance which was awesome bc so was I and he wore like really nice things but I should’ve known from the beginning he was bum. He said he’d pay me back for the Ubers on our first date, didn’t. I mean he flaked on our first fucking date! On top of he never posted me? Us? Not even a bday shoutout. But I see him post his friends all the time. One of his friends said something about his girl. Basically, she’s my gf 70% and if he meets someone then there’s a 30% chance he’ll leave her. And that stuck with me. Bc you can’t keep us on the low. There’s a 30% chance that you’re lowkey waiting to see if someone better comes along. Which, I feel very stupid for not realizing. Even though I should have known

Whereas the fucking weirdo wouldn’t post us or let me meet his friends bc he was SCARED someone would try and get it. See, that’s some loser insecure behavior. I should’ve known tho bc his parents had a weird relationship

[gingeraleluke]

Hey love, Can you do a blurb or anything where Vinnie is just talking about how much he loves the reader and how much they mean to him in the podcast that he did with Harry? Thankiesss and also I loveee your writing so much!! Love you babe🤍

𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: vinnie hacker x fem!influencer!reader

𝘀𝘆𝗻𝗼𝗽𝘀𝗶𝘀: vinnie confirms his relationship in a heartfelt way while on a podcast.

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: swearing, vinnie calling himself ugly, and fluff!!

𝗔/𝗡: i hope you enjoy this anon!! also, this is mostly dialogue and super short oops

◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

“have you seen a picture of me when i was a freshman in high school?” vinnie asked, laughing at harry’s concept of his love life. he found it hysterical how people assumed that because of his looks, girls would just fall right into his lap without him even trying.

“i was fucking ugly. i was fucking ugly. i had to learn to be like.. introverted. i had to keep to myself— i had to learn to keep to myself.” he chuckled, adjusting his headphones.

harry’s face was bright red from laughing and he struggled to get out a full sentence. “no one’s talking to you?”

“dude, FUCK no! i don’t know how i had like.. a girlfriend in seventh grade.” vinnie replied, deep in thought while harry erupted in laughter again. “it wasn’t even really a girlfriend—“ he rubbed his face with the side of his hand, “it was just some girl that i like..kissed once.���

“oh, so you didn’t really have a girlfriend in high school?”

“nah, man. i- dude, trust me, if i had a girlfriend in high school, i would have become so cocky. i’d have thought that i was the shit, for real.” vinnie shook his head, smiling.

“so, on the subject of girlfriends…what-what’s going on with you and y/n?” harry questioned, the vibes of the room immediately changing at the mention of your name.

“mmm…next!” he joked, raising a hand in the air. “next question, please?!”

“he slid out of that one, real fast.” abby joked, leaning into the microphone.

“nah, nah— im kidding. we can talk about her. um…what do you want to know?” vinnie scratched the back of his neck, internally walking the tightrope between panic and smitten.

“so, i mean— i’ve seen like pictures on twitter of you guys holding hands and stuff, so, i don’t know! you tell me!”

“yeah, yeah. um..” vinnie pondered, not entirely sure how to start.

“are you guys like togeth— oh, look at his face! he’s blushing. he’s as red as a tomato, look at him!” harry pointed, giggling and bouncing off of his chair.

vinnie struggled to hide his face in his hands as the two men cooed over him.

“he’s in love!” abby awed, holding his cheek against the palm of his hand.

“kinda, yeah! i mean— we…we’ve been dating for a few months now.” he nodded, blushing profusely.

“wait, is this…is this the first time you’re confirming it?” harry asked, looking at the camera.

“yeah, yup.” he tightened his lips together as abby and harry were astonished, both of their jaws dropping.

“well, you heard it here folks! i mean, wow. that’s—thank you man, i’m honored to have you announce that here! how has it been going? does she come out here? or no, she lives here, right?”

“yeah, she lives here. umm it’s going pretty well.” vinnie corrected, playing with his fingers as he thought about you.

“yeah? what’s she like? i need to meet her.”

“she’s great—“

“would she come on the podcast, ya think?”

“oh, yeah. that’s— she’d love to.” vinnie answered.

“really?”

“yeah, she’s really into that kinda thing and she can talk for hours about literally anything. it’s-it’s crazy, honestly. she’s just…” he sighed, putting a hand over his heart.

“you really like her, huh?”

“yeah. oh yeah, i mean she’s…” he thought a few seconds before completing his comment, images of you flashing through his mind and his eyes vivid with admiration. “she’s everything, really.”

“what is it about her that’s different? like, tell me about her because i don’t know much other than that she’s a youtuber, right?”

“yeah, yeah. she’s almost at a million subscribers which is pretty dope, so.”

“wow.”

“yeah, i’m proud of her. but um, yeah she’s just… i don’t know, i’ve never met anyone like her and i know that’s a super cheesy thing to say, but like, i mean that shit. she’s just so full of life and she has all these different sides to her and i just love being around her, i mean everyone does really.”

“how’d you guys meet?” abby asked, scratching behind his ear.

“so, i met y/n through jack who was in her friend group and jacks a good friend of mine, but he’d always talk about her and i just didn’t expect her to be so awesome, like…she really just is the fucking best, dude.”

“well im glad that she makes you happy.” harry and abby smiled at the boy who couldn’t keep his cool at the mention of you, and your heart melted as you watched him through your screen.

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

@radioblah-blah @eilishbby @lolalee24

[wallflowerimagines]

Hi! I looove your posts! Thank you so much for sharing your writing!

I was wondering… could you maybe write about the Four Lords with a shy S/O that gets bold and defensive when someone insults the lords? or calls them names? And the Lord’s reaction to the S/O acting different? Dk if im explaining myself >.<

Again! Love your work! Have a great day!

We stan protective partners on this blog!!

Warnings: uh...insults? They're pretty over the top😅 Also swearing.

Alcina Dimitrescu

Honestly, Alcina is more than able to defend herself.

She's got a tongue like a viper, and the thickest skin imaginable. If you really want to hurt her feelings, you have to be someone whom she already respects to a certain degree, or she won't even be phased.

Still, when she leaves a room, there's always some idiot that thinks it's a smart idea to talk shit.

Maybe it's a maid, maybe it's a guest in the Castle, but either way you're not having it.

"God, you're annoying." There was a pause before they opened their mouth again, and you rolled your eyes. "No please, by all means, continue to share your lack of taste with the rest of us."

You disassemble this dumbass, starting small with comments about their personality (trying to keep it classy), but escalating the more they choose to double down on the comments.

Alcina comes back into the room to find you practically screaming at this asshole.

"Look, all you have accomplished here today is revealing that you are a fundamental disappointment on every possible level. My life is worse now that I've heard you open your mouth, you disrespectful, shit licking worm fucker."

Alcina is stunned. You do not give off "aggressive guard dog" vibes at all, yet here you are defending her tooth and nail. While she had seen brief moments of your inner strength and protective streak (mostly towards her daughters) she just...never thought you would do the same for her.

It's not because she doesn't trust you or love you! But nobody has ever done something like this for her before? Ever? She's never had anyone try to protect her--not physically, and not even verbally. She's been so independent for so long that it's... Strange to see you support her so openly.

She doesn't need you to do this for her, she doesn't even expect it, but you do it anyway for no other reason than the fact that you love her. You want people to give her the respect she deserves.

I'm going to be real here: Alcina has never been closer to swooning before in her life. You're overcoming your shyness because you believe in her so much-- it's not a gesture meant to be romantic, but Alcina can't help but see this as a massive statement of your commitment to her.

Seriously. This is such a massive thing for her that if proposals weren't already on her mind, she is mentally picking out a ring for you the minute this happens.

Then, of course, she glides into the room, kisses you until you're breathless and babbling, and smirks at the unfortunate peon who thought they could get away with insulting House Dimitrescu.

She's in such a good mood that she's considering going easy on the idiot. Maybe removing their tongue would be enough of a warning?

Donna Dimitrescu

You don't really know how it's possible but apparently some people don't like Donna Beneviento? Some people think she's scary and unpleasant????

Wild. Can't imagine what that's like.

The two of you are honestly the sweetest, most toothrottingly adorable couple-- blushing when you hold each other's hands, sneaking glances at each other across rooms, giving each other kisses and forgetting whatever was on your mind...

Honestly, anybody who's critical of your relationship with your girlfriend is just a hater. Fuckers can pound sand😤

Still, you are pretty shy, so it takes a lot for you to defend yourself if someone comments about you. It can take a lot of courage to stand up against rude remarks, and sometimes it's easier to walk away.

Defending Donna, on the other hand?

The minute someone even thinks about dismissing her, you are ready to throw hands.

"My lovely girlfriend already said no, meaning you're either deaf or too stupid to pick up on simple social cues," you purse your lips and give the rude and pushy Villager a patronizing once over. "You and your opinion are equally useless. Get the fuck away from us."

Donna blinks.

She... Was not expecting this??? At all?? You're so nice! You always tell her about your attempts to avoid confrontation! What's going on??? How did you get the guts to say what she's always wanted to say?

Meanwhile, Angie is LIVING.

The little doll chimes in to assist you with the verbal homicide, working as a tag team to absolutely murder this moron. She's half partner, half hype man, and is so excited to do this with you. Normally, she has to protect Donna all by herself, but she's relieved and reassured that you stepped in first.

'USELESS IS TOO NICE, THOUGH! THAT IMPLIES THEY AREN'T A POINTLESS, RANCID, LONELY FREAK. THEY LOOK LIKE THEY CRY WHEN THEY MASTURBATE.'

You high five Angie, still glaring daggers at the unfortunate villager.

The two of you continue to ream into the villager, while Donna hovers nearby.

As surprised as she is, she's also grateful. She's only really ever had Angie to help shield her from insults and disrespect (and occasionally inducing horrifying hallucinations that make people claw off their own skin), but having you in her corner makes her feel safe.

Not to get totally sappy, but you're like her knight in shining armor in a lot of ways. And the fact you two are so similar is really motivating-- She wants to one day be confident enough to return the favor. Until then, she's happy to watch her two favorite people have fun insulting some stranger ❤️

Salvatore Moreau

With you being so shy, Salvatore is surprised how often he takes the lead in your relationship.

He's not normally all that outgoing, but you seem to bring out a side of him that's very protective. Whenever you have a bad day he wants to bundle you up and keep you safe from the world.

If he so much as holds your hand you start stuttering and avert your gaze. It creates a feedback loop where you both get flustered, but Moreau has never felt steadier. Despite your shyness, you make sure he knows how much you love him.

You're sweet as pie and twice as kind--Salvatore is the luckiest man in the world, nobody can convince him otherwise 💕💕

So it comes as a total shock that when a passing fisherman spits in your path and calls him a freak, your entire demeanor does a 180.

Your posture straightens and you look the villager dead in the eye, "I don't believe anyone asked your opinion."

Salvatore: 😳

This is not the time, and he totally knows it, but, uh, something about your tone??? Really does it for him???

While he's attempting to process why exactly he's starting to short circuit, you proceed to verbally shred this person to bits with clinical efficiency-- nothing is off limits.

They might try to defend themselves, but it's useless. You do not let up.

"Ugly? Monster? Bitch your teeth are throwing gang signs, don't throw stones from your shining glass house."

You insult their appearance, what they're holding, their smell-- you get so fucking mean that you might even make them cry.

Moreau is just lost right now, trying hard to figure out how exactly you were able to gain all of this confidence so quickly.

He's not upset! In fact he's very flattered! But, he also doesn't want you to get into a fight with some unimportant stranger. (After all, if they so much as throw a punch, they're straight up dead. Moreau is a patient man, but he's not that patient. You do not hurt his partner and live to tell the tale.)

He may a healer but...

Eventually he steps between you and the fisherman in an attempt to deescalate the situation, but you just kiss him on the cheek and step around him, determined to make your point.

Blushing hard, Moreau lets you do what you want. What can he say? Fish man likes himself a protective partner 💞

Karl Heisenberg

Magnet Man is not the most social guy to begin with, so any opportunities you have to stick up for him are already pretty slim.

He mostly knows you as the shy, sweet, easily flustered partner that lets out a cute squeak every time he sneaks up to hug you from behind.

Karl's honestly happy just to spend time with you all alone in the Factory. It's not the best or healthiest mindset, but he'd be perfectly content to only ever see you for the rest of his life. Spending time with anybody else feels like a boring waste in comparison.

But occasionally, you do head out into town with him. Heisenberg wants you to be safe so he doesn't do it often, but running errands with you is a weakness of his. It's domestic in a way that he's never experienced before.

He likes it ❤️

What he does not like is the shopkeeper starting to give their opinions on the quality of your relationship with him.

Most insults Karl will let slide because he doesn't particularly care. However if anyone makes a comment on how scared (shy) you look around him, how you must be being threatened into being with him, how poorly Lord Heisenberg is treating you...he won't stand for it.

But before his fingers can even twitch towards his hammer, you snap.

"You're clearly the blindest cocksucker I've ever met--so wipe the cum out of eyes and mind your own fucking business."

Karl does a double take.

He's heard you curse before, but quietly. The words coming out of your mouth are WILD right now, he has NEVER seen you so angry. You're defending him with the aggression of a wild animal, and it's simultaneously HILARIOUS, but for some reason he's also getting a warm fuzzy feeling in his chest?

He doesn't need you to protect him like this, but seeing you blatantly argue how much you love and cherish him in public reassures him in a way he didn't know he needed.

Still, hearing you call the shopkeeper "shit for brains" is the funniest thing that's happened in years.

Heisenberg starts laughing, and the more you shout at the idiot, the harder he laughs. Is it weird how hard he wants to kiss you right now?

Eventually, he just has to drag you away, cackling as you continue to shout insults at the unfortunate shopkeep. There's got to be an alley around here for some good old fashioned privacy 💕

[catintheruemorgue]

annoying things they do

summary: small things these guys do that just grinds your gears a bit.

characters: oda, dazai, kunikida, twain, akutagawa, atsushi, mori, poe, ranpo, fittzgerald, steinbeck, chuuya, yosano, gin, kouyou, higuchi, alcott and lucy

these are all based off things i do or have inconvenienced my life lmfao i’ll probs do a part two with everyone i missed this just got wayyy to long lol next im posting being friends with double black 

Oda:

If you're wearing shorts and have bruises he will poke them when you're resting your legs on him. He’s silent about it too and if you yell at him he pretends to act like he doesn't know what you're talking about.

Will smack your sunburn but this one is actually an accident. He just wanted to pat you on the back because you're amazing.

Will space out when you talk too long, sometimes certain objects are just so… mesmerizing

Dazai:

Loves to jumpscare you the only exception is if it was a trigger. In that case he will just call your name and whip something at you for you to catch at random.

When you're driving he likes to reach over and honk your horn. It's almost caused so many roadside fistfights.

If he sees a dog in public he will bark and growl at it.

Kunikida:

Won’t let you on the bed without socks on. You could be sick as a dog and he’ll still enforce this rule.

Cleaning is hard because he has a hard time throwing things away. You'll spend extra time as he holds two identical pens, trying to decide which one he wants to keep. He’s learned to plan certain days in his schedule for cleaning now.

Won't let you turn up the music in the car and will keep it at a level that's so low it's annoying.

Twain:

Walks around the house shirtless but then complains about how cold it is.

Blasts his music so loud when he wakes up in the morning and it's always early 2000’s hits. It's not rare for you to have Pocketful of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield stuck in your head by 9 am.

Always has to climb something, this stems from his adventurous side. It's not really that annoying but when you’re in a crowded area and he runs off to go climb the tall statue, screaming at you to take a photo… Yes it is. Especially when children try and follow him and you're stuck receiving glares from the parents.

Akutagawa:

Will not let you throw any food products out. He tells you it's a perfectly good meal (even if it's not) and that he will eat it tomorrow. It’s sad because you know this stems from childhood but it’s still annoying.

Reuses the same gross, musty ziplock baggies. You keep buying new ones but he doesn't get it lol.  

Will tell you if your breath smells, hair is messy, outfit is ugly. He does not see an issue with this and it's nice knowing someone has your back but he doesn't have to be so rude about it..

Atsushi:

If he drinks he's one of those drinkers who will not let you take it from him. Keeps an iron grip on the cup. He finishes it no matter how drunk and always throws up. Thankfully he rarely drinks.

He stops to help everyone, literally even if they just look like they need help. You've been late to so many things.

Will eat anything. Once you made steak and somehow forgot about it. It was hard as a brick yet he still almost broke his teeth eating it. You think you saw some tears as he told you it was delicious.

Mori:

Listens to people's conversations in public and isn't afraid to comment, loudly, about it. You know it's loud because they either stop talking or try and confront you guys.

Comes up to stops fast and brakes so hard you feel like he does it on purpose.

Sometimes if he and Elise get into a “disagreement” he’ll try and rope you in to take his side and you always do, knowing it would probably give him more satisfaction if you chose to side with her.

Poe:

Asks for constructive criticism but will then argue with you about why you're wrong.

Always humming a song he heard Twain singing and then it gets stuck in your head too.

Will deny stupid things like why your favorite mug is in the trash or why he just let out rather loud scream in the bathroom. You know he's lying because he looks away and makes sure his bangs are covering his eyes.

Ranpo:

Will call you out on any lie even if you don't mean to lie you just forgot about some of the details.

Don't take him grocery shopping if you have a set amount you want to spend. He won't even sneak, he will just say he wants something and throw it in the cart.

Such a backseat driver even though he can't drive.

Fitzgerald:

Likes to act like he's still in his twenties and will somehow get the two of you invited to college parties where he will attempt to do a kegger in front of everyone. You end up being the one to hold him up and he always ends with a, “LETS FUCKING GO!”

Likes to ask for the senior discount even though he's not that old, he just likes to hear the women validate that he's not old.

It’s scary how he used to buy without looking and now will scream if the price on a price tag is too high.

Steinbeck:

Always looking at the grass for wheat to chew on. It's so cheesy when you walk into the city and he's got it sticking out of his mouth.

He gets weirdly intimate with nature and you feel like you're third wheeling.

Has the mentality that he has to provide for you because he is the man. He gets so shocked when he finds out you still want to work.

Chuuya:

Has a hard time making decisions you could ask him what he wants for dinner and his mind will just break.

Gets way too pissed at movies and will actually get up and walk away. Once you were kicked out of the theater because he wouldn't stop yelling at the screen. Another time he walked out you waited a whole ten minutes before you realized he wasn't coming back.

Sometimes activates his ability at night and it's so scary waking up to him floating halfway across the room.

WOMAN TIME!!!!!!!!!!

Yosano:

Will glare at you so intensely if you say something she disagrees with.

Always tries to rope you into drinking with her even if you’ve said no the past ten nights.

Will describe wounds or injuries in such detail and just won’t stop, almost like she’s trying to fuck with you, but she’s not.

Gin:

Claims to be nothing like her big brother but then will go on to make the same facial expressions and do some of the same mannerisms as him.

Will spend hours trying things on just to put it all back, leave the store and change her mind when you’re almost home. Then she’ll have you run back with her to buy it all.

Is used to sneaking around so scares you a lot. Also on the topic of being silent sometimes she just won’t respond, thinking you can just read her vibes / mind.

Kouyou:

Will judge what you eat, especially fast food but will try and steal a fry in private when you're not looking.

Will say things like, “Well that's just the way the world works.” If someone tries to share their baggage with her. You understand she’s had a pretty rough life but it's caused you to almost spit out your drink multiple times.

At functions forgets about you for about an hour while she mingles with everyone else, you could tap on her shoulder and she'll dismiss you like you're a subordinate. Until you clear your throat again you'll see the slight blush as she apologizes.

Higuchi:

She has no sense of privacy. If she hears a crash or loud noise she will bust down the door. It’s sweet but not when the noises are usually from you knocking all the shampoo bottles down again.

Horrible road rage actually puts you on edge to be in the car with her. She doesn't even have to be driving.

Likes to act like she's a professional at everything and people usually believe it because of her suit. It's so nerve wracking when she giggles when they walk away with false information.

Alcott:

Will agree to everything you suggest but you can only tell when she doesn’t want to do it when you’re currently doing it.

Yet she’s not afraid to grumble about how annoying it is when someone bumps into you and doesn’t apologize. It’s sweet but you’re left dealing with the situation if the person is aggressive enough to say something.

Always corrects your spelling or if you say something like “I could care less.”

Lucy:

Will fish for compliments in a very obvious way like, “Wow. Wish someone would call me pretty..” and then just stare right at you.

Kicks you so violently in her sleep but won't let go of you so you cant get away.

Constantly stealing from restaurants. You're banned from a couple restaurants because she got caught trying to steal a cup or salt shaker.

[jinkicake]

BIG MOOD PATHETIC SCARAMOUCHE IS SO FUNNY HES RLY THE LITTLE MEOW MEOW😭 need him to be absolutely obsessed w me but he’s too embarrassed that he wants to hold my hand so he pretends to hate me and im like “ that’s mice sweetheart what di you want for dinner?” Saw someone make a dc where you ignore him for like 5 days and he’s on his knees begging like “PLEASE LOOK AT ME” like thats so real to me😭😭 bc once you’ve given him affection he’s gunna do everything to keep it within his grasp😔 ALSO HE DEF WOULD TIE YOU UP AND LEAVE THE DOOR OPEN💀 childe and singora are so casual about it😭 when he comes back they talk like you’re not even there “how long have they been here?” “I lost count after the fourth hour” “ they’re still conscious I’m impressed” like he’s such an asshole but he will do the 🥺🥺👉🏼👈🏼”can I have a hug” afterwards💀 love that for him. Keeps him in my pocket like a little purse dog, he’s my guard dog boyfriend bc he will kill first and ask questions later. “ I don’t like how he looked at you” “he’s the waiter” AND YOOOO DONT EVEN LET DOTTORE UGLY ASS COME CLOSE TO YOU ITS OVER FR-don’t like his new design he’s just a creep like I was the “clones” back the short haired funny scientist dude like I like them unhinged in a clown way!! He’s fuckable, the abusive leather daddy dom on the other hand😒 like he’s fun if he has a tired annoyed uncle personally like he lives to bully childe. But just going around threatening scaramouche and collei bc I forgot he did experiments on her too in the manga is musty like that mask is lame!! WHERE IS THE CLOWN KING😡- he would reflexively go for his throat like he opens his mouth and suddenly his throat is slit “ my bad I got anxious” SGDHSHS UNDERSTANDABLE😭😭😭 and the streets is saying he’s gunna have a claymore??? BE SERIOUS HES A SCIENTISTS TWINK WHOS HUNCHED IVER IN A LAB ALL DAY HE CANT CARY THAT SHIT?? Like he only experiments on KIDS bc he could never kidnap a whole adult like imagine he tries to get itto?? HIS ASS WOULD BE DEAD IN 10 SECONDS!! HE CANNOT FIGHT DELUSION OR NOT!! I would beat his ASS like if you don’t get your ass out my face looking like an X-ray 😒 like be bothering all them people bc he wants so ass he weights 70 pounds soaking wet so he needs to borrow childes body weight

no exACTLY. listen, i love mean!scaramouche as much as the next person but if he's not obsessed then i dont want him. pathetic!scaramouche is the best scaramouche

i saw this scaralumi fanart of him drunk at a bar and diluc calls lumine to calm scara down and when she answers hes like 'hey ugly' and she hangs up and he starts crying again and ugh it's too perfect like that artist captured his best side with that simple fanart heheh

HAHAH yeah scaramouche is the worst bc he would do something so mean to you like ignore you while working but the second he finds out youre mad at him he'll be begging for your attention like he didn't just starve you for two days.... hes a great yandere me thinks-

Scaramouche = purse dog is the best comparison ive ever read T T

okay hear me out... i can forgive all the heinous crimes dottore has committed but i draw the line at him being UGLY. Maybe if he were cuter I would also be obsessed w him but he's so..... eh- LOL i like the clones better than him! (rip to the clones :-(() but also.... him being ugly is kinda the appeal? am i right??? i can never make up my mind-

dottore is supposed to have a CLAYMORE?! WHAT THE HLLL,,,im very confused about his leaks bc i heard that the shit company can't let characters be playable if theyre evil and tbh i dont want him to be redeemed bc he literally cant be redeemed and hes fun as a psycho like??? idk idk idk im just focused on sexy yelan in 3.4 she will be mine!

also isn't dottore one of the top three strongest in the fatui??? right i think....? i seriously dont know how but tbh i dont care! i just focus on mr hottie soooooooooooo sexy capitano teehee