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absurdthirst · 2 years ago

Text

Puppy Love {Joel Miller x F!Reader}

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 12.1k

Warnings: Mentions of pimping someone out, post apocalyptic morality, mentions of violence, guns, biting, infected, death, slapping, angst, anger, Joel being emotionally constipated, declarations of love, unprotected sex, vaginal sex, outdoors sex, pulling out, mentions of pregnancy/infertility

Comments: You always follow Joel Miller around, you've got his back. You're in love with him. Putting up with Tess's nickname of puppy dog, you don't realize that Joel feels for you until the end.

A/N: ~Contains spoilers for Episode 2~ Follows the episode along with some canon divergence.

Co-written with @storiesofthefandomlovers

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|| MasterList || Joel Miller MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

Your eyes slide up and down the streets, daring anyone to come closer or ask questions as you clean against the crumbling brick facade and twist your head to look back at the two men huddled together about a hundred feet from where you are. You can’t hear what they’re saying but Joel looks even more pissed off than normal, even for Joel.

“What?” Joel shakes his head in annoyance, knowing he’s being squeezed for cards. He doesn’t get charged that much for the entire hydro stash he gets from his seller. “No, no fucking battery is worth that much and you know it.” He growls, narrowing his eyes at the untrustworthy weasel in front of him.

Robert’s eyes slide nervously around and he gives a small shrug, uncomfortable being around Joel and preferring to deal with Tess. “What can I say? Times are hard. It’s getting harder to come by these things.” His greedy eyes shift over to where you are looking out at the street. “Although….I’m sure we could work something out. I could cut the price in half if you, say, let me have your little pet there for the night.” He chuckles, referring to Tess’s mocking nickname for you. ‘Joel’s little puppy dog.’

Joel stares at the other man for a few seconds, just processing what he said, until it finally sinks in. “What the fuck did you just ask for?” He growls, low and quiet so you don’t hear.

“You heard me, Miller. A night with your little lapdog over there. She’s gotta be good at sucking cock because you keep her around. Got a fucking harem started with her and Tess. Do you have one sit on your face and the other ride your cock?” Robert guesses, crossing his arms with a cocky smirk, “or do they take turns sucking your dick? Mmm if you guarantee me a blowjob, I’ll even throw in some extras.”

You tense slightly, shifting forward from your place leaning against the way. Eyes watching the way that Joel’s fist curls tight for a moment. Wishing that you could hear what the fuck they are saying, but Joel told you to stay here, so that’s what you’re doing. “Joel?” You call out, getting his attention as he turns his head towards you. You’re wondering if you need to come over, knowing you will throw yourself into a fight for him if needed.

He shakes his head, holding his hand up towards you to stop you. He considers the guys offer, he can’t deny it. It would get him a hell of a lot closer to where he needs to be without having to do several burns for the cards. “No. She’s not available.” He finally says, not wanting to force you into something like that. He might be an evil bastard but he’s not a monster. “She’s not an option.” He decides, “you get more ration cards when we meet for me to collect it.”

“Come on man.” Robert shakes his head and his eyes slide past Joel to leer at you. “It’s just a fucking blowjob. I’ll tell you what?” He huffs, smirking and looking back at Joel. “Let me fuck her, both holes, have her suck my cock and I’ll give you the battery for free. Hell of a deal, right? I’ll even let you watch if you want to.”

Joel can’t help but reach up to squeeze the asshole’s throat. His anger makes him growl as he chokes the prick who dared to violate you like that. “You get the ration cards when I collect it or I can kill you now and get the battery for free? Hell of a deal, right? I’ll even let her watch me kill you.” Joel sasses, tilting his head as he watches his eyes practically bulge.

“Shit!” You leap forward but Joel just turns his head.

“Stay there!” He orders harshly, making you stop in your tracks. Watching as Joel leans in and whispers something else to the disgusting little rat he was having to buy from to get the battery he needed.

“No, no, it-it’s good!” You hear Robert choke out, gasping and sputtering when Joel lets him go. Clutching at his throat and coughing as Joel turns around and starts striding back toward you.

“Let’s go.” He demands, his scowl even deeper than normal as you scramble to catch up with his long legged strides. You weren’t short but he’s speed walking.

“What the fuck just happened?” You demand, wanting to know what the fuck is going on.

“Don’t worry about it.” Joel growls, body still vibrating with anger. He hates that you were a bargaining chip in this new world. Twenty years ago, it would’ve been illegal but anything goes in this new era, even the things the QZ deems illegal are turned a blind eye to.

“Did you get the car battery?” You ask and Joel doesn’t look at you, knowing he’s barely holding on to the thread of decency he has when it comes to you.

“No.” He says without further explanation, “he’s got to locate it.”

“Okay.” You think there is more to it, but he obviously doesn’t want to talk about it. You just walk along beside him, watching some of the people on the street part, giving Joel a wide berth. “So what do we do now?” You ask, unsure if he had other things to take care of.

“We keep low. You seen Tess? I ain’t seen her for a couple of days. Startin’ to get worried.” He frowns, guiding you down the alleyway that takes you back to his building. “I haven’t seen her.”

You mimic his frown, both wondering where Tess is and hating that he’s so worried about her. It’s always been the two of them. You know they fuck, you know sometimes Tess will sneak into his bed, and you hate it, but you don’t hate Tess. She is capable of a lot in this world and you know she keeps Joel grounded, something you seem unable to do.

“Let’s head to mine and then we will try to track her down.” Joel says, unaware that Tess is already waiting in his room, her face beaten up and sore.

You sigh softly, knowing that you will do whatever he wants. It’s dumb, but Joel had saved you when you arrived in the QZ, scared off some less than honorable people and you have been drawn to him ever since. It’s hard being in love with a man who doesn’t love you, doesn’t even look at you like a woman, but you are loyal to him. He claims he’s not a good man, and that’s true at times, but he’s good to you. “We’ll find her. I’m sure she’ll be in your arms tonight.” You mutter, hating how your stomach twists in jealousy.

Joel pretends to not hear you, knowing you and Tess have some tension going on between you but he ignores it. This life is rough enough without needing to fucking deal with women drama. He gets what he needs when he wants and that’s all that matters to him. He rolls his eyes and strides a little faster to get to his room.

When he opens the door, Tess is sitting there with her face bruised and swollen and he’s ready to fucking kill whoever did that to her.

“Jesus.” You huff, eyes wide at her injuries. It’s on the tip of your tongue to make a snarky comment, but instead you watch Joel fuss over her and clean up the wounds with the bottle of alcohol sitting next to the sink. It would be touching if it didn’t break your heart. “What the fuck happened to you?” You ask finally as he’s dabbing at the corner of her mouth. You flop down on his sofa and glare at your feet.

Joel gently grips her chin as he cleans her up, his eyes burning into hers and he doesn’t hear your question, too busy making sure Tess is okay. Neither of them see the crestfallen look on your face until your scowl covers it. Tess sighs, gently pushing Joel’s hand away as she explains that she was held hostage by a couple of Robert’s goons. Joel hisses in annoyance, knowing he should’ve killed that asshole when he had the chance.

You hate how neither one of them includes you, feeling like an extra wheel. Dragging your feet off the coffee table you slap your hands on your thighs and stand. “Since she’s home, I guess I better do the same.” You want Joel to tell you to stay, but you know he won’t. Wondering why you put yourself through this torture when he only had eyes for Tess.

Joel wants to ask you to stay but he needs to talk to Tess about what happened. He needs to form a plan and you distract him. “See you later.” He tells you, not even looking your way and Tess offers you a slight smirk as she bids you goodbye. Joel tuts when you stomp out, slamming the door behind you. “Tess…” He murmurs, shaking his head.

“What? She’s like a damn puppy dog hanging around you all the time.”

Joel snorts, “what does that make you?”

Tess frowns for a moment before she leans forward. “You know what I am to you.” She challenges him, holding his gaze until he turns away. You have fucked everything up, everything was fine until you showed up and things changed. “Joel-“ She pauses, deciding against asking a question she doesn’t want to know the answer to, or at least have it confirmed. Instead she decides to change tactics. “We need to go find Robert and our battery.”

Joel nods, “we do. I’ll go find her and then we can get ahead. Get your shit together.” He orders, standing up and making his way out of the door to track you down. He needs you for backup and also, he is secretly amused at the way Tess frowns whenever you are mentioned. Tess is…Tess is a comfort to him, the woman who has seen him at his worst and still wants him.

You are innocent really, still able to fight but you haven’t seen that side of him. He doesn’t want you to. He wants you to think of him as the closest version to the person he used to be. He misses that person sometimes, grieves him almost as much as he grieves Sarah. The small things he’d bitch about, like money or working late, are trivial compared to the issues he faces today.

When he finds you, you are sulking in your room, “come on. I need you to help me and Tess track down Robert and his goons.”

Staring at him incredulously, you huff after a moment, bending down to pick up your boots. “You’ve got some fucking nerve, Miller.” You grumble, feeling like you are being taken advantage of right now. Joel doesn’t comment, just sends you a satisfied look as you put your boots on and turns towards the door.

“Get your pack, we might need it.” He tells you before he walks out of your rooms like he owns the damn things. Your fault for letting him in, your fault for being so fucking in love with him that you let him walk all over you.

“This is the last goddamn time.” You promise yourself, muttering angrily as you get ready.

Joel doesn’t say anything, just raises his eyebrows as he listens outside. Both you and he know that’s not true. When you’re ready, he guides you down the alleyways to meet up with Tess. “Right. Let’s go get this fucker. I’m sick of his bullshit.” Joel huffs, making his way through the alleys to find the place Tess detailed when she told him where she was held.

“Awwww, you decided to come along, I’m so touched.” Tess coos mockingly when you reach her, making you grit your teeth and want to punch her in her good eye.

“Well, someone has to clean up your mess.” You huff back.

“Enough.” Joel growls, shaking his head at you before he turns to Tess with a pointed look. They did that a fucking lot, silently communicate like you weren’t fucking there.

Tess nods and Joel leads the way, entering the building with gun in hand and he creeps down the hall, using hand signals to gesture for you to walk or stop. He knows you and Tess have some fucking women issues between you but he doesn’t care. He doesn’t have time for that trivial shit.

It’s not the time to be snarky. Instead of dwelling on the issues, you focus on the task at hand. All you care about is keeping Joel safe. Tess by extension just because you know that he would be upset if something happened to her. She was his woman, not you. Your own gun in your hand, you flank his left side as you follow, eyes peeled for any danger.

Joel is naturally anxious, keeping his eyes open and ears clear for any noises. When he spots the dead bodies of Robert and his goons, he doesn’t give a fuck. He wants to know who did that to them. When the door to his right suddenly opens, he doesn’t think. He just acts. Shoving the girl against the wall so she drops the knife and placing his foot on it, gun aimed at her. When Marlene appears, Joel narrows his eyes, listening as she begs him not to shoot.

Your fingers tense around your own weapon, aimed at the two fireflies in front of you. “What’s who he sold our battery to? The Che Guevara of Boston?” You roll your eyes at her humor but it’s true. Listening to her tell Joel that they need to take this girl to the state house to meet her group. “Bring your puppy with you too.” You hiss at that, pissed off that Tess’s fucking nickname for you has caught on. “I tried to recruit her, but she’s too loyal to you Joel.”

Joel conceals the way his heart flutters at the news that you wanted to stay loyal to him. His face remains impassive and the girl tries to get her knife back while Marlene points out that she is bleeding and he needs to hurry up and decide. “Fine.” He grunts after Tess states her case.

Huffing, you shake your head. “You two have fun with that.” You know it’s a bad idea. This is bullshit and there are other places to get a battery.

“You’re going with us.” Joel tells you sternly and you know that you will, if for anything but to watch his back.

“We don’t need her. Joel. She’ll just be a liability.” Tess barely spares you a glance and that pisses you off more.

“I’m going.” You hiss, glaring at her.

Joel doesn't need this catty bullshit, the girl is glaring at him and it's putting him on edge. "Fine. Get your shit kid, we are leaving." He orders the girl, Ellie, who goes to get her knife back with a scowl. When night falls, Joel guides the group through the old tunnel that he uses to smuggle things in and once you're outside the QZ, Ellie's eyes widen.

"Holy shit." She gasps and a truck drives by.

"Get down!" Joel hisses, forcing you to duck alongside Ellie.

“Jesus.” You hate being outside the QZ. Hate the risk and you know that it’s getting harder and harder every time. “We need to move. The fucking soldiers have been crawling around.” You murmur quietly, looking around and shivering slightly in the rain.

Just as you get ready to move, the QZ guard who buys from Joel approaches you, gun raised. Joel doesn’t even think, surging forward to start pummeling the guy to death. He’s feral and there’s nothing any of you can do except watch him. Ellie watches with a fascination while Tess stares impassively.

“Joel.” You know the man is capable of violence, you’ve seen it, but this was unhinged. He turns back to look at the girl and you, the expression on his face is fierce and you shake your head after Tess shows him the red scanner. She’s infected. You listen to the hurried explanations and you know you need to have this conversation somewhere else. “We need to go.” You tell him, picking up the knife that the kid had stuck in the bastard’s leg and handing it back to her. You don’t know about her claim that she’s immune, but she deserves to be able to protect herself out here. “Take the rifle.”

Ellie takes it and Joel is almost dazed as you walk through the debris and overgrowth to find shelter in the city. Once you’ve found where you usually stop, Joel slumps down in the chair, flexing his knuckles and hissing. Ellie looks exhausted and you tell her to get some sleep, you’re stopping here for the night. “She’s infected.” Joel grunts when she’s fast asleep, bringing yours and Tess’s eyes over to him.

“Her wound looked healed.” Of course it had been dark as shit, but bites from the infected never looked better. It’s always inflamed as the fungal infection spreads through the body, taking over. You glance at his knuckles, wishing that you had ice to put on it. “You should wrap it up.” You tell him.

Joel ignores you, just imagining what could’ve happened out there if that asshole had blabbed. You’d all be dead. Hung for treason or some bullshit like that. “I’m fine.” He finally answers and Tess looks over at him, “she’s right.” That Joel definitely ignores. He grunts, standing up, “I’ll take first watch. You two get some sleep. I’ll watch the girl.” He says, grabbing his rifle and ignoring the pain in his knuckles when he grips the handle.

You sigh, knowing it won’t make a damn bit of difference, but you find yourself a corner away from the door so you have time to react and lay your pack down. Using it as a pillow as you turn your back to Joel and Tess. You don’t want to see whatever else they do or talk about tonight, tired of being the third wheel and tired of feeling like you should just leave.

Joel keeps watch most of the night until Tess tells him to get half an hour. “Lazy bitch couldn’t even get up for a watch.” She scoffs at your sleeping form.

Joel shakes his head at her, “she didn’t sleep the night before. Trying to help me out by keeping an ear out for the radio. Just - let it, okay?” Joel asks and Tess snorts, nodding her head. He sits down, closing his eyes but he never truly relaxes, just rests until the sun starts to rise.

“What do we do with the girl?” Tess asks when he stands up, walking over to her.

“Kill her.” Joel says, knowing that Marlene wouldn’t find out. He could lie and say she got infected for real this time. It’s not far from the truth. “We don’t know if she’s gonna turn.” He murmurs, keeping his eyes on the curled up ball in the middle of the room.

Grunting, you wake up with a jolt, used to the nightmares that plague your sleep. Everyone in the fucking horror reality has them, or they’ve never lived outside the QZ they were born in. Flipping over, you notice that Joel and Tess are already awake, both of them watching the girl. “Shoulda woke me.” You grumble, sitting up and rubbing the sleep from your eyes before you shuffle over towards Joel.

“You needed the sleep.” Joel murmurs, ignoring the scoff from Tess. “We should kill her.” Joel says with finality just as the girl wakes up, glancing around to see you sitting up and Joel sitting there with his rifle aimed towards her, anxious and tense as hell. “You make one wrong move and I’ll kill ya.” He promises, making Ellie scoff and pull her sleeve up.

“I’m fine. No different than last night.”

You shift slightly, looking from Joel to Ellie. “Why didn’t she kill you?” You demand, asking about Marlene. Ellie explains about the daily testing and holds out her arm to show that it is perfectly steady. No tremor, which is normally the first sign of infection besides a bite. “Jesus.” You shake your head, unsure of what all of these means and look back towards Joel. It’s him she needs to convince. Or Tess rather because she can sway Joel’s opinion.

Joel considers not killing Ellie when Tess points out that it hasn’t spread. “Fine. Better get something to eat before we head out.” Joel says, sitting down, and he flexed his knuckles.

“Broken?” Tess asks and he shrugs, “hairline. It will heal fast.”

You frown at that but still get your jerky out of your pack.

Ellie, meanwhile, pulls out a delicious looking sandwich and your eyes widen. “Is that chicken?” Tess asks and Ellie explains how Marlene got it from smugglers. Joel snorts, chewing on his jerky and trying to ignore the pain in his hand.

You hate that he is hurting, knowing that he can’t take anything that would help because it would make him slower to react. Instead of offering to take the gun, you open your pack and offer him the precious bottle of aspirin you have. It took a month of ration cards to get it, and you normally used it when your cramps would get too bad. “Here.” You offer quietly, “to help with the swelling.”

Joel takes the pill, knowing it’s aspirin and trusting you. He swallows it dry and makes the decision to head out. “Let’s go. We need to take advantage of the daylight.” He says, standing up to grab his pack and the rifle. Ellie scrambles to pack up her pack again and soon enough, you are heading outside with Tess keeping close to Joel.

“Do we want to take the long way or the short way?” Joel asks and it’s not your opinion he’s actually asking for. Tess snorts.

“You mean the long way or sure to die way.” She corrects sarcastically, making Ellie’s eyes widen dramatically and you roll your own. You’ve been the short way and it’s fine as long as you pay attention.

“I vote for the long way given the small amount of information available.” Ellie huffs, making you smirk.

“The long way, fast.” You decide. “Sooner we get her to the state house, the sooner you have the truck you need to get to Tommy.” That’s what all this is about after all, getting to his brother.

Joel nods, agreeing with you. You, Tess, and the girl trail behind him. Joel hears Tess telling the kid about Boston and the wreck it is now, but he isn't really listening, too busy scanning the area for any threats: human or infected.

He walks into the hotel and Ellie is amazed. "Wow. Did you guys ever stay somewhere like this?" She asks and Joel snorts while Tess says, "it was a bit out of our price range." You can't help but snort when Joel sasses the kid by hopping down onto the last step.

"Come on." You urge her forward and she rambles on about the hotel. When she rings the bell, Joel rolls his eyes and you shrug, offering him a look of amusement.

Halfway through the lobby when Ellie screams, you turn around and rush back through the water, unsure if it’s a clicker. Relieved when Joel isn’t shouting and shooting, you find the decayed bones of an unfortunate bastard floating. He must have moved and scared the girl. You hum, watching as Joel offers her his hand, something that he wouldn’t have done if he didn’t somewhat believe her story about not being infected, so it bodes well for her. “Come on kid,” you offer, giving her a small smile. “Let’s go up to the rooms. We’ve got a hell of a climb.”

Once you climb the ridiculous amount of stairs, Joel curses when he finds the exit has caved in. “Fuck.” He grunts.

“I can fit through. Let me try and get through.” Tess says and Joel shakes his head, “we can go the short way.”

Tess huffs, “we don’t have time. I’ll be fine.” She promises and starts to climb through the debris. You hover near Ellie, trying to ignore the way your heart pangs at their secret look, only between them. It makes you feel like you’re a thousand miles away from them. Ellie slumps down on the floor and Joel follows suit, looking over at you while Ellie starts to ask him questions.

You fiddle with your gun, trying not to feel like you are stuck in the middle of a Q&A that you don’t want to be at. Snickering to yourself when Ellie sasses back at Joel that she knows where Detroit is. Only to be surprised moments later when Joel actually knows where you are from. You had only told him once and assumed that he had forgotten or didn’t care enough. “So you and her are….” Joel’s entire body tenses.

“Pass.” Of course he wouldn’t define their relationship, he doesn’t ever acknowledge things Tess says in front of you, but he doesn’t deny them either.

Ellie huffs and turns her inquisitive eyes towards you. “So that means you and her are……” She trails off, trying to get either one of you to fill in the gaps.

Joel grunts, “pass.” He doesn’t want to talk about you or Tess with Ellie.

“Are you- is it like a throuple situation?” She guesses and Joel snorts, “nope.”

You and Tess would kill each other before you fuck each other. “Absolutely not.” You wrinkle your nose at being with Tess. God, she gets under your skin but she is important to Joel.

“Rightttt.” Ellie drawls just as there’s a thumping on the door. Joel stands up, gun in hand, anxious until Tess shouts her announcement that she’s back. Joel sighs slightly, relieved to see Tess, and he gestures for you and Ellie to get your shit.

Your stomach knots, knowing that the hardest part is coming up but there is something calming about the view from the terrace. Looking out over the ruins of the city that you had wished to have visited before all of the world went to shit. Tess pulls back the heavy plastic curtain so Ellie can get her first look and you walk up to the ledge.

Ellie has to step up on the little ledge and she looks down at the courtyard below. “There’s so many of them.” Ellie exhales, looking at that view. You shift to stand next to her, Joel on the other side. Tess starts to talk, explaining the way the fungus spreads. “They’re connected.” Tess hums. “More than you know.” Joel looks over at you and meets your eyes for a second.

You wish that he cared about you, but he doesn’t. You tear your eyes away from his and listen to Tess tell Ellis about how the tendrils spread underground, alerting other infected to your location. “You’re not immune from being ripped apart.” Tess cautions her. “You understand?” For a moment, the woman you hold such a grudge against seems almost motherly and you wish that she could talk to you with half the kindness, although you know you’ve not been exactly nice to her. Your feelings for Joel getting in the way of that.

“So we’re not going that way.” Ellie huffs and you shake your head, knowing what’s coming. “Short way?” She asks, looking between the three of you and you look to Joel for his opinion.

“Museum.” He decides, making you roll your shoulders in anticipation of the problems ahead.

You are anxious, preparing yourself to enter the museum and Joel glances at you, "be careful." He tells you softly, ignoring the glance from Tess. He opens the door, pleased after discovering the fungal roots are dry. He enters the Bostonian Museum, keeping his gun raised and ready.

Blowing out a soft breath, you grip your gun in your hand tightly and keep your head on a swivel as you watch your steps. The museum is dark and all you have for light is the flashlights, the kid breathing heavily at your back and you swear you hear her huff under her breath because Joel wouldn’t let her have a gun. She looks around, taking in the scene as the old building creaks and groans around you. “Yeah, cooked.” Joel says and Tess grunts.

“Finally some fucking luck.” Ellie steps forward, almost carelessly at their conversation. “I guess we should have gone this way in the first place.” Joel hums, not watching as Ellie turns a corner.

“Oh shit!” You rush over and shine another light on the body she discovered, groaning to yourself when you see that the person has been ripped up. Knowing what causes that. “What the fuck did that?” She demands, making you shush her quickly. You look over at Tess and Joel, the other woman looking nervous.

“Maybe.” Tess whispers. “Maybe he was attacked outside. Crawled through the door, the door was open. It could have been him.” She insists, making you roll your eyes and scoff quietly. She knows that’s not what happened.

“I don’t hear anything.” She insists. “What would you hear?” Ellie demands, her voice at a normal volume and all three of you turn towards her to quiet her down.

Joel holds his hand up, telling Ellie to quieten down. “What would you hear?” She repeats in a whisper, “you saying an infected did that?” Tess shushes her and you bite your lip. “-because I’ve been attacked by one and it wasn’t like that.” Ellie looks back at the body.

“Okay from this point forward we are silent. Not quiet, silent.”

Ellie shakes her head “what-”

Joel cuts her off, “no questions. Just do it.” Joel is anxious, always tense when he’s in closed spaces, and he slowly makes his way up the stairs. It’s difficult to move so slow but he is careful when he steps on the dried fungus. He manages to make it up the stairs and onto the second floor. He opens the door, walking in with his gun ready. The ceiling collapses and Tess shoves Ellie forward, pushing her into you and the three of you fall onto the floor. Joel helps Ellie up and that’s when you hear it. A clicker.

Shit. Your gun comes up and you immediately move in front of Ellie, flanking Joel to his left and Tess to his right. You’re trapped in a room with a fucking clicker. You don’t dare to breathe, barely creeping forward since they rely on hearing, totally blind with the large, hard fungal growth covering their heads. You hear her breathing start to pick up and you turn to find her wide as you realize there is more than one. All of you crouch down behind a display and Joel motions to Ellie that they rely on hearing. You can see the terror on her face, making the way your heart is pounding in your chest. Joel puts his finger to his lips again as they continue to make horrible screeches and clicks as they search for the source of the sounds. The clicker comes around the display and the little girl sees it for the first time, inhaling sharply.

Shit. The clicker turns and screeches before Joel brings his gun up to shoot it.

It’s terrifying, fighting for your life, and you are scared that Joel is gonna get bitten. You scramble to shoot the clicker but eventually you run out of bullets. Joel curses, “fucking go.” He hisses, “I’ll distract it.” You rush to hide around a corner to reload your gun. The girl and Tess are across the room and your hands shake as you struggle to reload your weapon. “

Fuck.” You hiss and Joel comes to stand beside you, doing the same thing. His eyes are full of fear and you stare back at him until you hear the clicks.

Your eyes close for a brief second, well aware that this could be it for you. You hate it. The fact that you could die in this fucking museum and never find Tommy. Never tell Joel how you feel. The floorboards creak and you hear the clicks right next to you. Another sound draws its attention and you turn to watch it, finding Ellie cowering behind a display and both you and Joel creep over to her. Making your way silently until Joel steps on a piece of broken glass. You cry out and start shooting as the clicker flies over the display and knocks all three of you to the ground, trying to infect you as you fight it off.

Joel curses, scrambling to keep the clicker away from you and Ellie and himself. It’s a struggle but eventually he manages to push it aside and put a bullet in its neck and eventually it’s face. Just as that one falls, the other rushes forward and Tess swings an axe into its head. Joel scrambles to grab his rifle, shooting the bastard in the head to kill it. “You alright?” Joel asks Tess as she stands.

“Twisted ankle.”

He turns to you, eyes wide and asks you the same question. “I’m fine.” You answer and Tess asks Ellie who exhales shakily, “well I didn’t shit my pants.”

You can’t help but laugh at her response, knowing you felt the same way the first time you dealt with clickers. “Are you fucking kidding me?” Turning back towards the kid, your eyes widen when you see that she’s injured again. “Ah…I mean if it was going to happen to one of us.”

You catch the way that Tess tenses up, making you frown slightly but she’s quickly redirecting the conversation. “Hey, let’s get out of here.”

Making your way onto the roof, it’s obvious that Tess needs medical attention. Joel hands Ellie a rag for her arm and turns his attention to Tess. Leaving you to walk over to the other girl and help her while he concentrates on wrapping her ankle. “Come here. I’ll help you.” It will be a good distraction, tending to her wound rather than watching Joel fret over a twisted ankle. Soon her arm is wrapped and she’s walking towards the edge and the scaffolding that connects the two buildings. “Over there?” She asks and Joel barely glances at her. “Yeah, I know it looks scary.” Joel starts but Ellie interrupts him. “That was scary, this is wood.” She huffs as she brazenly walks across the beam and makes you smirk at the other two adults.

"Just wait there. Give us a minute." Joel says and you step to follow Ellie across the wood, not wanting to see the tenderness Joel gifts Tess with. "Be careful." Joel warns you while opening his backpack. You scoff, walking across the wood as brazenly as Ellie. Joel shakes his head, while he tapes Tess's ankle.

"Told you, she's trouble." Her eyes focus on Joel but he doesn't notice, set on the job at hand. "There's probably more ahead."

Tess nods, "so we'll deal with it then...I got it. I got it." She tells Joel when he wraps around her ankle again.

Joel leans back to look at Tess until his gaze turns to the building across from them. "What about the kid?" He asks, "maybe the first bite didn't take but what about the second?"

Tess huffs, turning towards him, "why don't you just take the good news? Can you do that?" She asks Joel, "can you just for once think that we might actually win?" Tess asks and shakes her head, "just go and watch her and your fucking puppy."

Joel sighs, grabbing his backpack and rifle before making his way across the wood. “Wow.” Ellie exhales, looking at that view. You shift to stand next to her, Joel on the other side.

“Is that everything you hoped for?” Joel asks Ellie as you stare across what used to be a major city now turned to a deserted urban jungle.

“Jury’s still out.” Ellie replies back, “but man…you can’t deny that view.” You hum in agreement and Joel looks at Ellie before his eyes meet yours for a second.

“Tess gonna live?” You ask, breaking the moment up but you hate how his eyes seem to suck you in. It’s not going to happen for you and you need to accept that. You’ve already decided that when Joel and Tess get their vehicle from the Fireflies, you are going to stay. You’ll go with them or turn around and find a way back to the QZ. You can’t do this anymore. It’s too hard and you know that it will never be you that he picks. Stupid of you to fall for a man who was obviously involved with someone whether or not he admitted it. Joel rolls his eyes, not answering you and you swallow harshly. “When we get to the state house-” You start, wanting to tell him your plan, but Tess comes hobbling up.

“Come on, let's get there before it’s dark” She demands, impatient to get moving again as she swings herself onto the ladder.

Ellie goes next and then you look at Joel who nods at you. You nod and make your way down the ladder, firm in your decision. Joel glances at his watch, thinking about Sarah, and forces himself to keep going. As you walk towards the state building, Joel glances down at Ellie’s arm. Cautious and wondering if she’s gonna turn at any second. When you arrive, there’s no one there and you duck behind a car to see if anyone shows. “Where the fuck are they?” Tess asks and Joel shakes his head, looking back at Tess before his eyes meet yours.

He stands, rifle in his grip, and he makes his way over to the truck. Cautious and alert, he opens the passenger door and turns back to you, Tess and Ellie. “Stay back.” He orders, making his way around the truck to find the back is empty.

“Joel, what the fuck is going on?” You, Tess and Ellie come towards the truck and Joel shakes his head.

“I don’t know.”

You look around, a bad feeling settling in the pit of your stomach. “They went inside.” Ellie tells you, pointing to the blood on the ground and you sigh, knowing that is never a good sign.

Tess seems to take this as a personal attack and grabs Ellie’s hand as she marches towards the steps. “Tess.” Joel huffs, making you roll your eyes but you follow are the pair. Not for Tess’s sake, but for the girls. You know Joel will be right behind you. You walk into the state house, finding all of the crew dead on the floor in the middle of a vegetation patch.

“Holy shit.” Ellie hisses, and you have to agree. This is bad.

“Fuck.” You hiss under your breath, checking for signs of FEDRA or if it was infected that got them.

Tess searches the bodies, “I mean there’s gotta be a fucking radio or something, right?” She says, searching the crate closest to her.

“Who killed them? FEDRA?” Ellie asks and you shrug, glancing back at Joel who pulls the body at his feet back onto its back.

“No. One of them got bit. The healthy ones fought the sick ones. Everyone lost. Tess? What’re you doin’?” He asks, turning back towards her as she continues searching.

Tess steps towards the girl and you edge your way in front of her to protect her. “Where did Marlene say that she was taking you? Ellie!”

The girl steps forward, “uh. I don’t know. Just west.”

Tess turns away, “just west. Fuck. Okay. Well, I mean one of them’s gotta have a map on them, right?” She says more to herself. “Joel, can you help me?” She asks, nearly begging.

Joel shakes his head, “no! Tess, it’s over. We are going home.” He walks towards her, wanting to get everyone back to the QZ and safe.

Tess growls, “that’s not my fucking home.” Joel stares at her, eyes unreadable as Tess stands up. “I’m stayin’.” She declares, “I mean, our luck had to run out sooner or later.”

Joel’s face falls and your eyes widen just as Ellie says, “fuck. She’s infected.” Joel turns back to Tess, staring at her, almost begging her with his eyes for that to not be true.

“Show me.” Joel demands and you can hear the agony in the two words. He doesn’t want to believe it, doesn’t want it to be true. Your stomach drops, hating that she has been infected despite your differences. It didn’t mean you wanted her dead.

“Joel.” She takes a step towards him and instinctively, he jolts backwards, pulling away from her. You walk towards the kid and put your arm around her shoulder gently, wanting to comfort her. Tess pulls her jacket away so you can see the bite on her neck and you close your eyes. “Oops.” She jokes. “Right?’ She turns to Ellie. “Take your bandage off.” You help Ellie take the bandage off to reveal that her own wounds from the clickers haven’t gotten any worse. She’s not infected. Walking over, she takes the girl's arm. “Look, Joel.” She demands, holding it up for him to inspect. “This is real. Joel she’s fucking real.” She insists. “I need you to get her to Bill and Franks.”

“No,” Joel shakes his head.

“They’ll take her off your hands. They’ll handle it from here.”

“No, no, no, I can’t. They won’t take her. They’re not going to take her.” He frowns.

“They will ‘cause you’ll convince them.” Tess tells him. “Yes you will. I never ask you for anything. Not to feel the way I felt…” You frown in confusion, not understanding what the fuck she is talking about. Joel loves her.

“No.” Joel shakes his head but Tess interrupts him.

“Not to…shut the fuck up because I don’t have time.” Joel looks devastated and you clutch Ellie’s shoulder as you try not to react to this entire scene being played out in front of you.

“This is your chance. You get her there, you keep her alive, and you set everything right. I know you don’t feel the same way I do but you need to stop burying your feelings. Life is too damn short to keep lying to yourself.” Tess says, her eyes meeting yours before she looks back at Joel’s. “All the shit we did…” She looks over at you, “he was gonna offer you up to Robert. He was gonna trade sex with you for the battery we needed.”

Your jaw drops and Joel refuses to look at you, keeping his gaze on Tess’s. “Little puppy dog, always following him around. Thinkin’ you were the third wheel when it was always me.” Tess chuckles humorlessly and shakes her head. “Please say yes, Joel, please.” Tess begs and Joel’s gaze shifts over to you.

The way you’re looking at him is enough to make him say no. He wants to protect you, protect the girl. He can’t do that if he takes you both to Bill and Frank’s. “Please.” Tess begs again just as the body behind Ellie shifts to crawl.

“Oh fuck!” The teenager yells and ducks behind you and Joel when you move her out of the way. Joel doesn’t hesitate to take his gun out, killing the bastard, and his jaw is clenched when he sees the fungus curling around the dead digits. He looks towards the door and rushes past Tess to open it. Eyes panicked when he looks back after shutting the door.

“How many?” Tess asks.

“All of them. Maybe a minute.” Joel says, spinning around in a panic to face you but you refuse to meet his eye.

Tess gets to work, pushing over the barrels of gasoline, spilling it over the ornate tile floor. “What are you doing?” You ask and Tess answers with “making sure they don’t follow you.”

Joel is frozen, facing the reality that the woman who’s been his right hand for so long is not walking out of this building with him. He steps closer to her, grenades roll across the floor. “Joel.” Tess moves to stand in front of him. “Joel.” She repeats and he finally meets her gaze. “Save who you can save.” She orders, her eyes flicking over to you before she meets his dark stare.

He’s struggling. Part of him wants to drag Tess out of here but the other side of him wants to keep you safe. He’s torn and eventually, the side of the living wins. He stares at Tess, offering her a small nod, and he spins, grabbing Ellie’s hand and wrapping his arm around your waist. “Stop! We’re not leaving her. Get off of me you fucker! I’m not going with you!” Ellie shouts and you let Joel drag you out of the building. He’s frantic to get you away before the building explodes with Tess inside of it.

“Hurry up.” He growls, dragging you both until you’re far enough away. He ducks down as the glass explodes, shoving you on the floor, and he grabs his rifle to aim it in case any infected chase after you.

Ellie stands beside him, watching their bodies fall to the floor with the flames, and Joel eventually lowers the gun. “Joel…” You trail off and he shakes his head, turning to walk away. Ellie lingers for a moment until you step forward to follow him.

Your jaw rocks and you shake your head, unable to believe that he had refused to even talk to you after Tess dropped that bomb on you. At least she told you before she died, even though it was supposed to be one last barb through your heart. “I’m not going.” You decide, stopping short, only a few hundred feet from where you had watched the building explode. “This is your mission. For Tess.” You turn around and start walking back the way you just came, sure that the infected will be burned now given the size of the fire bomb and the smoke still billowing from the building.

Joel pauses, watching you for a moment until he strides forward to grab your wrist, pulling you back to stop you walking away. “You ain’t going anywhere. It’s too dangerous. Stop movin’.” He growls when you try to pull out of his grip. “I don’t understand. What - why you wanna go back?”

Instead of trying to pull out of his grip, you spin around, slapping him across his cheek. “You fucking bastard!” You hiss, yanking your wrist away from him as he loosens his grip in shock. “You were going to- going to fucking sell me to Robert for your fucking battery!” Hot tears spill down your cheeks and you don’t even bother wiping them away. “I knew you didn’t-“ you break off, “fuck you, Miller.”

Joel is shocked that you slapped him and he hisses, “Jesus Christ.” He curses Tess despite her soul not even leaving the damn earth yet. “I didn’t sell you. He wanted you and I said no. I fuckin’ told him no.” He clarifies, ignoring the wide eyed look from Ellie.

“Tell me you didn’t think about it.” You challenge him, chest heaving as you step closer and square up to him. “Tell me that you didn’t consider it.” Joel doesn’t answer you and your chin trembles when you see the guilt in his eyes. “I thought so.” You choke out. “I fucking loved you and you were going to whore me out to save money and get your goddamn battery.”

He shakes his head, “no baby. I didn’t - I didn’t do it though.” He chokes, knowing you hate him and he doesn’t know why that destroys him when he’s fought so hard to keep you at arms length. “You can’t love me, okay? I’m - I’m a fucking mess and I was fooling around with Tess until I realized that I -” He cuts himself off, knowing that it’s getting dangerous.

“Until you what? Couldn’t whore her out?” You spit, shaking your head at him. “I put up with the stupid fucking nickname. ‘Puppy dog’.” You sneer. “Guess that’s what I was, huh? A stupid little puppy dog that doesn’t fucking realize she’s not wanted. Following you around, helping you, trying to make you- fuck, I don’t know.” You lift your hands helplessly and slap them down against your thighs. “Make you love me, I guess. But that’ll never happen. I’m not Tess.” You close your eyes, and sigh. “Just- go to take Ellie where Tess wanted you to, go find your brother. I’ll- I’ll be fine. I’m not your problem.”

He knows he will lose you forever if he lets you go now and he’s lost so much in his life. The burden he carries every damn day with each life he loses around him. He can’t lose you too. He brushes over what you said to finish his own sentence. “I was fooling around with Tess until I realized that I was fuckin’ in love with you and Jesus fuckin’ Christ that terrifies me.” He confesses, chest heaving.

You frown, not believing him for a second. “Don’t lie to me, Joel.” You sob out angrily. “You at least owe me the fucking truth.”

Ellie steps forward. “Hey so, uh- it’s-“

You turn around and glare at her. “Not now!” You hiss, wanting to finish this so you can leave and find some place to hole up for the night before sneaking back into the QZ. “She was practically living in your apartment. She was there every damn night. Now you want to tell me you weren’t fucking her?”

“I stopped. We weren’t - we were plannin’ the smuggling. We weren’t doing shit other than figurin’ out how to get shit past the wall, past FEDRA. Jesus, sweetheart, I didn’t - I don’t want to put you in danger. I’ve been tryin’ to keep you safe. Tess knew how I feel. Shit, she was jealous and that’s why she called you my puppy dog. I should’ve stopped it but doing that wouldn’t meant acknowledging these fuckin’ feelings that I’ve been tryin’ to squash down. Love doesn’t succeed in this goddamn hellhole. Love is a weakness and I - shit - you make me weaker than a paper straw under a one ton weight.”

You don’t know if you believe him. The sting of finding out that he had even thought about giving you to Robert, even for a moment, stings. But you know it would be safer for Ellie if there was more than one capable adult looking out for her ass. There’s enough of you that immediately wants to forgive Joel that you stare into his dark eyes for a moment before you nod. “Fine.” You whisper. “I’ll….go with you on this fucking haul.”

Joel is relieved that you are coming along. He knows this conversation isn’t over but you need to get moving. Get to some kind of shelter before it gets dark. “Come on baby. We can talk later. Let’s get safe first.” He says, grabbing his rifle. Ellie raises her eyebrows at him as he walks past her.

“Never knew you were so emotional, Joel.” She scoffs, remembering the books that would be passed around in secret at the school about romance and how the guy would kiss the girl after declaring he loved her.

Instead of following directly behind Joel, you put the girl between you and him. Bringing up the rear for safety as well as to give you some space to allow for thinking about what the fuck you are going to do. You know Joel isn’t a ‘good man’ in the pre-end of the world morality. Maybe he was then, but this life, this world changed everyone - you included. You don’t even know as much as Tess might have, but you know that he had saved you when he could have killed you. That he didn’t give you to Robert. Biting your lip, you wonder if that’s why he was choking the bastard the day before yesterday. Not that it mattered, the fucker was dead. Sighing softly, you shift your gaze around the fading light to look for somewhere to safely pass the night.

Joel guides you through the forest that is invading Boston, nature taking back what is rightfully hers. Joel sighs, holding his rifle, until he comes around a sheltered area. It’s not comfortable but it’s safe and that’s all that matters. “We will set up here.” He declares, watching the tree line for any disturbances and when he doesn’t find any, he shrugs his pack off.

You don’t speak, just shrug off your own pack and set it down as you start to get the area ready for the night. While the infected weren’t in this area, wild animals were. A fire would be necessary to keep them from getting too close and you know that the sun will be setting soon. You start to drag trash and debris closer, scrapping out an area to start the fire and pile things high. Joel can’t move much, not with his hand even though he would protest over it.

Joel watches you start the fire and Ellie sits down on the ground, opening her pack to pull her sandwich out. She’s starving and she doesn’t want to wait to eat. When you’ve started the fire, Joel pulls out his food and water, holding it out towards you. “You gotta eat, sweetheart.” He says, watching you sit down across from him. He will mourn Tess later when he takes watch. He doesn’t want to show his emotions now when you’ve shattered him with your onslaught.

Shaking your head, you don’t take his offerings. “You need it more than me.” You tell him as you reach for your own pack. “I have my own but I just-” You bite your lip. “I’m going to sleep first. You take first watch and wake me in a few hours.” You don’t let him argue, setting your pack up as a pillow and turning your back on him and the girl, curling in on yourself and forcing yourself to close your eyes.

He doesn’t argue, knowing you need to rest and he needs time to think. Ellie looks at him as he starts to chew on the jerky and he ignores her raised eyebrows. “Don’t say a word, kid.” He orders, shaking his head after he swallows the chewy bark.

Ellie rolls her eyes, “whatever dude. You can’t see what’s right in front of you. What Tess saw.” She says and continues eating. Joel grimaces, thinking of Tess. He tried to hide how he felt about you from her, thinking he had been successful but he wasn’t.

You don’t know how long you’ve been asleep, but your jerk awake with a gasp. Your hand reaches for the gun that is right next to you and you flip over to try to figure out what woke you. The fire is still burning and the kid is curled but about five feet from you, wedged between the concrete wall and the fire. Joel is still awake, his eyes watching as you sit up. “Shit.” You huff, putting the gun down and blinking rapidly. “Get some sleep, I’ll take over.” You promise, groaning quietly as you move to your feet to stretch.

Joel shakes his head, “no. I wanna talk. Come here.” He pats the space beside him, wanting you to come and sit down.

You hesitate but eventually sit down beside him. “What is it Joel?” You murmur, not wanting to rehash this bullshit.

“Shut up.” He orders and you open your mouth. “Shut the fuck up.” He hisses, pissed off with you. “I’m not gonna make this damn speech again, okay? I don’t do this shit. Not since before outbreak day. I - I love you. I don’t want to lose you. I don’t - I can’t lose someone else and I - I haven’t felt this way in so damn long and I tried to ignore it but I love you. I’m in love with you darlin’ and that fuckin’ terrifies me.”

His speech startles you, not expecting to hear something like that. Not from him. You close your eyes and absorb the words that you have wanted to hear for so long, believing them to be nothing more than a wistful dream. “I’m sorry.” You offer. “For that, I guess. For Tess.” You have to look away from his dark gaze, unable to look at him for too long without wanting to kiss him. “I’m not sorry that I love you though.” You murmur, looking into the fire. “It’s- it hurt everyday but it was worth it.”

He turns to look at you, his brown eyes almost orange as they reflect the flames of the fire. He’s slow, giving you a chance to pull away but he leans in, cupping your cheek. His calloused thumb caresses the skin there and he leans in to kiss your lips. It’s soft, the opposite of him, but he wants this moment to be good, to be memorable in case you don’t make it past tomorrow. In this life, every day is a bonus.

Eyes slipping closed, you want to live in this moment. Joel’s lips on yours makes your entire body tingle. Reaching up and taking his hand while your other finds his shoulders. Moaning softly because you can’t believe this is happening and you never expect it to be so gentle.

Joel groans softly into the kiss, grabbing your ass to pull you into his lap. Straddling him and he glances over your shoulder to make sure the kid is still asleep. “Fuck.” Joel groans when you are pressed against him, his lips finding your jaw and he kisses until his lips press against yours again.

You whine again his lips when his hands squeeze your ass just like you’ve imagined more times than you ever want to admit. Wrapping your arms around his neck and shamelessly grinding down on the bulge in his jeans that you had always salivated over. “Joel.” You whisper, not wanting to wake the kid. “I-“ he shushes you, pressing his lips to yours again.

His hands slide under your shirt, wanting to feel more of you, and he groans when you grind down on him again, cock hardening in his jeans. He thinks you’re gorgeous, fucking gorgeous, and he’s jerked off thinking about you too many lonely nights after he stopped sleeping with Tess. “We gotta be quiet.” He orders, sliding his hands higher so he can undo the clasp of your bra. He doesn’t take it off, just pushes it up your chest so he can slide his hands around your torso to cup your tits, squeezing them in his rough hands.

There’s a voice in the back of your mind that wonders if this is because Tess is dead. If you’re merely replacing her for him. You push it down, ignore it. You don’t care when you are getting to touch him like you’ve always wanted to. Ducking your head down and kissing the bare patch on his jaw like you’ve always wanted to. Your fingers fumbling with his belt as you try to get him free from his pants. You can’t ride him like this, not without taking your pants off and that’s dangerous. Hell, this is too dangerous really. You’re distracted by him.

He knows this is dangerous, the girl could wake up, but he desperately wants to feel you. He works on your pants, unbuttoning them and he shoves his hand inside, cupping your cunt after sliding under your panties. He finds you wet but not dripping and his fingers rub your clit after sliding through your folds.

You swear you’re going to bite through your lip trying to keep quiet. Loving the thick fingers you’ve watched so many times slide though your folds and press against your clit. “Joel.” You pant, needing more from him. “I- you have to fuck me.” You gasp out. “Please. Just- just once.” You know that he might change his mind come morning. That he could put that wall back up but you will be happy if you just get one night. “Please, baby. I need you.”

He nods, knowing he needs that connection. Losing Tess, nearly losing you, it’s been a long ass day and he wants to connect to you. He whispers for you to stand up and he withdraws his fingers, making you whine softly. When you stand, he pulls your jeans and panties down to your ankles, dragging you back into his lap so you are straddling him, cunt bare to the cool night air. He reaches down to take his cock out, “can’t cum inside of you. Gonna need you to let me drag you off when I cum.” He whispers, knowing he won’t risk you like that.

You nod quickly, readily agreeing to whatever he wants. “I know- it’s- it’s okay.” You promise, reaching down and wrapping your hand around the thick head of his cock and moaning quietly at the smear of pre-cum building up on the tip so gorgeously. “I-“ instead of telling him that you love him again, you rock your hips forward and line him up so you can sink down on him with a moan of his name that is pressed to his shoulder as you take him.

Fuck, you’re so tight. Hot and wet around him and you mean so much to him. His heart thumps in his chest while his cock twitches when you bottom out. “Fuckkkk.” He hisses through his teeth, hands gripping your ass and he struggles to remain calm as he allows you a moment to adjust around him. “Gotta be quiet.” He whispers in your ear, kissing the skin beneath it.

“You- you might have to cover my mouth.” You admit breathlessly, whispering the words to him as you flash him a quick smile. “Always been loud in bed.” An irony in a world where you’ve had to be silent at so many times when you just wanted to scream. Your fingers sink into his hair and you tug on it slightly as you start to move, wanting to ride him and eager to feel this incredible cock filling you more.

Joel knows he will want more after this. He’s already addicted to you and the thought of ever giving this up, you up, has him on edge. He presses his lips to yours, silencing you with his tongue, and he groans softly when your walls grip him tight when you find the angle that works for you. His hands slide up and down your back, squeezing your ass and enjoying how damn good you feel around him.

You try to stifle your sounds but it’s hard when he feels like he’s in your fucking throat. Stretching you out and making you feel more relaxed than you have in years, while craving more. Your tongue tangles with his while your thighs start to push up and down, moving yourself on his length in a way that keeps you as close as possible. Needing to feel every inch of him as much as you can.

Joel is trying to hang on to his composure, resist the urge to roll you over and just slam into you, fuck you into the ground, but he can’t. The kid is there. He can’t do that now. So he lets you lead, just pulling back to watch you work yourself on his cock. When your mouth opens to moan again, he shoves two fingers in there, wanting you to keep quiet. “Can’t wake the kid, darlin’. You gotta keep quiet.” He reminds you, leaning in to rasp in your ear.

His hands are dirty, filthy. You should want to spit them out but you don’t. Not even caring at this point. The feeling of his cock shredding up into you every time your hips fall is too good to care. His voice rumbling in your ear makes your cunt clench around him, swearing you can cum from him talking.

There’s so much to say to you and yet he can’t. The risk is too much, to both waking up the kid, and to his own heart. He can’t bring himself to say anything but he does lean in to kiss you, replacing his fingers with his lips, and his hand finds your clit. Rubbing tight circles in it as he gets closer to his own orgasm.

You whimper, groaning as he keeps rubbing your clit. Trying to keep quiet but it’s so hard when he feels this good. Your arms tighten around him and you kiss him harshly, feeling your cunt bottom out and your entire body light up with pleasure as you start to cum for him.

“That’s it baby.” Joel practically exhales into your mouth as you clamp down on his cock, body shaking against his. He pulls you closer, thrusting up into you as best he can until he’s pushing you onto the ground beside him, barely managing to shift onto his knees to cum on the dirt and not ruin your clothing. He pants, chest heaving while his cock twitches in his hand. “Jesus Christ.” He exhales, letting go of his cock to tuck himself away and he shuffles over to where you are on the ground. “Sorry baby. Couldn’t - needed to pull out.”

“It’s fine.” You pant, understanding why he needed to pull out, but wishing he hadn’t. “You can’t risk it.” You’ve never told him anyway and in the moment isn’t a good time anyway. It’s not like it matters anyway. You shuffle quietly, trying to pull your clothes back on and put yourself to rights.

Joel watches you put your clothes back on and once you’re settled, he reaches for your hand, dragging you close to wrap his arms around you. He breathes you in, relieved that he didn’t lose you today. He lost Tess, which he will process and grieve in his own way, but right now, he’s just happy to have you. He loves you, he really does. He wishes he had told you sooner but this life is unpredictable at the best of times. You have a journey ahead with him to get to Bill and Frank’s and he will do everything he can to keep you safe. Whatever it takes…he won’t lose anyone else he loves.

****

Joel reluctantly turns over the responsibility of watch to you. He needs rest, you know he didn’t sleep last night and he’s had a fucking hell of a day. You all had, but him most of all. Whatever him and Tess had been towards the end, he had cared for her in his own way and he needed to grieve her. You keep the fire crackling, staring into the flames when you aren’t watching the inky blackness around your small space and listening for more than the rustles of wildlife. Your jerky and your water bottle your own companions through the rest of the night until the first rays of sun peak over the horizon and the sky begins to brighten.

When Joel wakes up, you and Ellie are talking, and he winces at the sunlight, trying to figure out how long he’s been asleep. “Why didn’t you wake me?” He grunts and you shake your head, “you needed to sleep.”

Ellie nods, “yeah man. You had a rough day yesterday.”

He sits up, running his fingers through his hair and he shifts to stand up. “We gotta get going. Get your shit together. I’m gonna take a piss.” He stumbles to the tree line, gun in hand and he checks his surroundings before he shoves the weapon in the back of his jeans and pulls his cock out to pee. When he returns, you’ve put the fire out and are ready to go. Joel grabs his pack and leads the way, rifle in hand.

You walk alongside Ellie for a bit, hanging back as you try to figure out how to tell Joel. You should, he deserves to know. “So, uh, did you work your shit out?” Ellie asks, making you look over at her. “Cause I don’t want it to be a tense trip.” She offers, making you snort.

“It’s going to be a tense trip regardless.” You remind her, the journey is no walk in the park for sure. “But we’ve talked. While you were asleep.”

Ellie snorts, “talked. Sure.” She doesn’t believe you just talked. She’s not dumb. She learned about all that in school and she knows that’s how most adults show how they feel. You fluster and look at Joel as he strides ahead, rifle gripped in his hand. He sighs and looks over his shoulder at you and Ellie.

You see Joel jerk his head towards you, motioning for you to come up beside him. Eager to get away from Ellie’s prying questions, you hustle forward and catch up to him. “Something up?” You ask, wondering if he wants to talk about the plan for getting Ellie to Bill and Frank’s.

Joel turns to look at you as you come alongside him, “everything okay with the kid?” He asks and you nod, “yeah she’s good.”

He sighs, “you think she’s gonna be okay with Bill and Frank?” You shrug, “who knows.” Joel glances behind him again to see Ellie looking around and he takes a chance to reach out and hold your hand.

Shocked, you look down at his large hand wrapped around yours, holding it tight and yet he’s not crushing it. Your heart thumps in your chest and it’s impossible to not fall more in love with him. “Joel- I need to tell you something.” You murmur softly, not wanting Ellie to hear.” You can feel him tense up but you squeeze his hand reassuringly. “It’s not- it’s nothing bad. Or, I guess it’s better to say, "I made peace with it a long time ago.” You take a deep breath. “You don’t have to worry about getting me pregnant.” You confess. “I can never have kids.”

Joel frowns, turning to look at you. "You can't - shit. Baby, I'm so sorry." He murmurs, knowing it must've been hard to process. "What - what did they say?" He is curious and wants to know why you can't have kids. He also wants to comfort you but all he can do is squeeze your hand. Even this is more intimacy than he is used to displaying.

“Premature ovarian failure.” You roll your eyes at the words that had been told you so many years ago. “Basically, I stop producing eggs.” You explain. “I found out about two years before the end of the world. So I guess it’s handy?” You try, your joke falling flat. “Not that I would want to have kids in a world like this. It’s not fair to them. Not fair to her.” You nod back towards Ellie. “I just- if we, you know, again….you don’t have to pull out if you don’t want to. If you do, I get it.”

Joel feels guilty that he is happy to hear he doesn't need to pull out but he's sad that you won't get to be a mom. You'd be good at it, even in this fucked up world. "I'm sorry you couldn't, you know, but, next time...I want you in a bed and I ain't gonna pull out." He murmurs so the kid can't hear.

You shiver slightly, happy to hear that there will be a next time if both of you can help it. You hum quietly and shoot him a small smirk. “Maybe we can find a hotel to spend the night in tonight.” You tease softly, not sure what awaits you on this journey but at least you’ll be there. By his side this time, instead of trailing along behind him like his little puppy.

#pedro pascal #joel miller #hbo the last of us spoilers #tlou hbo #hbo tlou #hbo the last of us #the last of us hbo #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller smut #joel miller imagine #joel miller fanfiction

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ivelle-serenity · 6 months ago

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Skateboard 9

Wind breaker

author's note: thank you for supporting my story! i will try my best to update early.

✧˖° — windbreaker men

✧˖° — mdni, smut, description of not safe for work content.

✧˖° — this is a story not one shot.

"They're not using me! They're just asking for my help," I protested.

"And you agreed?" Wooin's tone was almost mocking, laden with insult, making my chest feel even heavier. Why do I feel like I'm being cornered?

"The famous Demitra Roberts, agreeing to be a replacement for an old friend—or should I say an old enemy?" Wooin's face darkened as he spoke. I could hear the sarcasm in his voice. I glared at him.

"Who would imagine you'd agree to replace the woman who was your enemy for so long?" he added, this time laughing.

"Shut the fuck up." I stepped closer to him. "You don't know what you're talking about. Don't act like you know me, so shut your mouth!" my eyes flaring with anger.

"But I do... We all do!" he said with a laugh that shocked me even more. My heart sank at his words.

I looked down and clenched my fists. He knows something—no, they all do. Why am I still surprised? They must have done a background check on me. They might even know my other secrets. It's disheartening to think about. Wooin approached and held my face, forcing me to look up at him. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes, and a familiar pain in my heart. Why am I feeling this again?

"They don't see you as their friend, Demitra," Joker said firmly. I couldn't look at him because Wooin was right in front of me. His eyes were full of amusement, as if my tears were something fascinating.

"For them, you're just a shadow of Shelly. They don't need you. Jay is just fooling you while he waits for his pathetic girlfriend," Hyuk said with disgust.

Why do they have to mention Jay? What else do they know?

"S-So what? I don't even like him, so why would it matter--"

"Yes, you should not," Joker said, as if warning me.

"But don't you hate being compared to her?" Wooin said with a grin. Horror plastered on my face. The tears I had been holding back started to flow.

Please, stop it already. I can't hear it anymore.

"How dare they use you? You're a legend, like us. You're a fucking Princess." He shouldn't use my underground title like that. I've been trying so hard to forget the title given to me back when I was greedy for money. It was all supposed to be in the past. I should be leaving it behind, but what are they doing? They keep bringing it up!

"They don't deserve you. A princess like you should be respected," he said seriously, squeezing my cheeks harder.

"Maybe she just wants to be treated like trash," Hyuk's insult stung, making me feel even worse. I saw a strange look in Wooin's eyes.

"Hyuk," he warned his friend, but Hyuk just shrugged.

My tears flowed freely, making Wooin pause. He immediately let go of me. My whole body trembled from the tension. I nearly collapsed, but Joker caught me for the second time, holding me by the waist. He gave Joker a significant look before I felt Joker's fingers wrap around my neck from behind.

Wooin smiled at the sight he saw. Joker made me face Wooin by wrapping his fingers around my neck and waist. I clenched my fist as Wooin approached me and wiped my cheeks.

"You're mine, do you understand?" he whispered as he looked at me. I could feel the possessiveness in his tone. "You belong to us. We have the right to tell you to stay away from those jerks, especially Jay. They're all losers." he said softly.

Joker's grip tightened but not enough to make me lose my breath. "Can't you see how much we want you, Demitra? Can't you see how much we adore you?" he whispered in my ear. "No? Does Hajun's cock doesn't ring a bell?" After Wooin's words, I felt a strange sensation pressing against me from behind. It didn't take long to realize that it was Joker's erection, rubbing against my body.

Realization dawned on me - they all wanted me. It was a truth that I couldn't ignore. The heat between my thighs grew as the possessiveness in Wooin's words sunk in.

"And you know, I wouldn't mind sharing him," Wooin said, a smirk playing on his lips.

Confusion clouded my mind as I tried to comprehend his words.

Before I could react, Wooin leaned in and kissed Joker beside me. I watched as he inserted his tongue into Joker's mouth and played with it. I blushed at the sight. This only intensified the heat spreading through my body.

I couldn't quite catch Joker's reaction as Wooin released his grip on him. But what I did see was Wooin licking his lips seductively, shooting Joker a teasing look. And then, I heard Joker mutter a curse under his breath, a clear sign that things were heating up between them.

"Don't be jealous, princess. He could be yours too. But first, you have to be mine," Wooin stated, his thumb grazing my lips.

Stunned, I felt Wooin's lips on mine, his kiss filled with passion and possessiveness. I closed my eyes, feeling a rush of emotions as Joker's kisses trailed along my neck. Lost in the moment, I gave in to the intensity of their desires, unable to resist the pull they had on me. They made me feel special and important in a way I had never experienced before.

Joker bit a sensitive spot on my neck, causing me to let out a moan. Wooin's tongue swirled with mine as his hands roamed all over my body. I gasped when I felt him cupping my breast. The way he touched me let me know he was experienced in this. I could feel how wet I was getting, and Wooin seemed to notice as he paused his actions while Joker continued to give me small kisses on the back of my neck.

"Join us," he insisted again. "Join us and we'll fuck you until you forget everything else." his voice was deep and filled with danger.

I looked at Hyuk, who was just standing there watching us with a stern look. Was he in on this too?

"He wants you just like we do. He's just making sure you'll agree to our conditions." Wooin chuckled.

I shook my head. "No," I said firmly, giving him a sharp look. "I don't want to join your group. And don't make me one of your whores, Wooin." I said definitively.

His expression turned blank. After I spoke, even Joker paused but remained silent. I watched as Wooin clenched his jaw in disbelief and anger.

"Yeah?" he retorted sarcastically. "Then you leave me with no choice. You're going to stay here until tomorrow. You will not fucking race with them."

My eyes widened in shock. He can't do that!

"You can't confine me here."

"The hell I can't."

My eyes burned with anger. I had never felt this furious in my entire life. How dare he do this to me? Okay, I know it's my fault for lying to them about joining Hummingbird, but they don't need to interfere with my decisions. I have my own life.

I watched Wooin move away from me and drink his wine in one gulp. He exchanged a look with Hyuk before leaving the room. I was about to follow him when Joker tightened his grip on my waist.

"Stop, you’re just making it worse," Joker murmured.

"Worse? Isn't locking me up here bad enough?" I snapped at him, trying to pry his hands off my waist.

"Why do you want to be with them so badly?" Hyuk said sarcastically, walking closer to me.

"It's not like that. I promised I would help them—"

"Stupid," he shook his head. "You’re so stupid. Wooin just explained everything earlier, but you didn’t listen. You know what? We don’t even need you here. You’ll just be useless with that brain of yours. You’re nothing but a toy to fuck with."

My face flushed with anger and humiliation. I slapped him. Joker quickly stepped between us. I felt the heat from my eyes, tears threatening to fall again. I couldn't believe Wooin said Hyuk liked me when he was treating me like this. I didn’t say anything and let Joker handle him.

Just by looking at them, I could tell they were arguing. Even though part of me wanted Joker to put Hyuk in his place, I didn’t want it to turn into a physical fight.

“You’ve crossed the line. Do it again, and you’ll have to deal with me,” I heard Joker warn him.

“Who do you think you’re scaring, Joker?”

"I'm not scaring you, I'm warning you.” Joker roughly grabbed Hyuk by the collar, and I immediately grabbed Joker's arm. I didn’t want to see them hurt each other! I knew all too well how Joker fought. He’s a boxer, for heaven's sake.

Their attention shifted to me. Hyuk just scoffed before pushing Joker away. I watched Hyuk leave, feeling a wave of relief wash over me. I looked at Joker, who was still staring at me. I rolled my eyes and sat down on the sofa. I wiped my cheek, not wanting to show him how much his friend's words had affected me. It hit me that Joker was the only one who had been kind to me, unlike the other members of his crew. I had made Wooin angry, and now Hyuk too. Were they really that mad at the Hummingbird that they took it out on me too?

“Your friends are assholes,” I muttered.

He didn’t respond.

“I know Wooin is just playing with me. There’s no way you all wanted me like he said. Do you even see how they treat me?” I almost laughed as I grabbed the bottle of expensive liquor from the table. “Maybe this is all part of your plan with Sangho, huh? Maybe you want me close just to hand me over to him.”

I was about to take a swig from the bottle when he snatched it away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said coldly.

“Liar,” I shot back.

He set the bottle down on the table and took off his denim jacket, looking overheated.

“We want you, and we’re not lying about that.” His words seemed to etch themselves into my mind.

“You just want to fuck me,” I said quickly, making him stop. He lifted his gaze, then let it travel down my body. I was still wearing my uniform—nothing revealing, just my P.E. outfit.

“Not just me,” he replied, turning away after he said it. My lips parted in shock.

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vamp1reheart · 7 days ago

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Cacophony

Synopsis: Your life has never been easy. Your everyday problems and constant anxiety have always made you someone people don't want to be around. But everything changes when you save a cute boy from a bully, And now he and his brothers are devoted to you. And now he and his brothers swear extreme loyalty to you, And only to you.

Notices: Violent and sexual content! Reverse harem! Bullying, depression and anxiety! Ot7 x reader! Supernatural au. I do not own BTS! This fanfic is my own! English is not my first language, so sorry for the mistakes! Yandere Themes! :)

Chapter: 02

CHAPTER: 01(One)

Studies can seem 100x worse for those who don't have friends.That's a fact.and I can say it with absolute certainty.

For me, school was never a pleasant environment. You trust people, you create bonds with them, and then they throw you away like spoiled milk.not to mention the cruel people. They always outnumber you. If you are even slightly different, they will do everything they can to make your life hell.

Even so, teachers insist on saying that this is the best time of their lives, that school is an incredible place, all these lies that we already know.

But I've given up. I gave up on my school reputation a long time ago. I've tried so hard to please everyone and fit in, but they still insist on being cruel to me.

My thoughts are cut off by a loud crash of a book onto the table.

is my teacher.

"___ are you there again, traveling in your head?! I've been calling you for hours..."

He mumbles a few more things that I don't even care to hear.

"____ you're traveling again!"

"sorry" I say in a whisper.

Sometimes it's better to accept the scolding without fighting, than to have to argue with it for the rest of the day.

Apparently he thinks I have some kind of concentration problem, but it's better this way, at least that way he goes easy on the scolding.

At the end of classes, I'm collecting my materials, most of my classmates have already left, but I don't care.

"___ can I talk to you?"

My teacher says, I pick up my backpack and put it on my shoulder, heading towards his desk.He was nervous, again. I already know what he wants.

"___ você sabe que eu me importo muito com você. Você é um aluno com grande potencial, você era o mais inteligente da sua turma. Eu não vou te perguntar o que aconteceu, você não precisa me responder, mas eu separei algumas atividades diferentes para você. Você pode achar ruim, mas quem sabe, com métodos diferentes você consegue fazer."

He mumbles his words, afraid of offending me.

"It's okay..." I say so as not to hurt him, I know he's trying, and I know that unlike me, he won't give up.

I'm going back home now. The extra activities are in my hands.I don't see any need for them, I don't even do the mandatory ones.

I stop in my tracks when I hear a loud bang.

The noise comes from the alley right in front of me.

Obviously I'm not going to look. I'm not a stupid movie protagonist. I just go on with my life.

"Where are your brothers to protect you now?! You freak!"

The voice came from the alley. And more and more loud noises and insults.

It's obvious that this is nothing more than idiots bullying each other.

I get close to the alley wall and stop to observe.

As I suspected.

There are four boys in total, but one of them is on the ground, being kicked by the other three who are surrounding him.

I should leave, I can't get into a fight where I'm sure I'll get beaten up.

That's none of my business.

They're all men, and I barely have the strength to hold a few bags.

But he seems to be suffering.

Humans take desperate measures to try to protect themselves.

And that's my justification for what I'm going to do.

I grab a pen from my backpack and grip it tightly in my hands. Before I can even think about why I'm doing this, I'm already in the middle of the alley.

"Hey! Stop this shit!"

The three men stop and stare into my eyes without blinking.I'm starting to think I shouldn't have intruded.

"Who do you think you are? You slut?"Oh no, they're coming my way.

They are talking to me, but my fear doesn't allow me to hear. But when one of them pushes my shoulder, I can't feel anything anymore.

Grabbing the pen I shove it into one of the boys' neck with all my strength.

He screams in pain and agony. It's as if everything has frozen, the two boys next to him are in complete shock as they see their friend holding his bleeding neck.I can't move, I'm paralyzed with fear, I don't even have the strength to tremble in this situation.

I know they thought about killing me, but how could they? Their friend's throat was open, so they had other priorities.

They leave the alley, carrying their bloodied friend who cries for help.

When my eyes go towards the boy my heart weighs in my chest.

It's not because he's so handsome, but because he's already staring back at me.

His eyes stare at me in a way I can't identify. It's deep, as if he's looking into my soul.

Then he smiles, his bunny smile snaps me out of my trance. I quickly turn around and walk out of the alley.

I'm not crazy enough to go check on him. Not when he was looking at me like that.

Without even realizing it, I'm already in front of my house.I go in and lock the door tightly. Yes I am scared, not just of that kid with the bunny smile, but I stuck a pen in a bully's neck.

If they decide to take revenge I'm pretty much dead.

I don't know why I did that, nothing went through my head at that moment. All I felt was anger and disgust.

------------

The next day I get up early. Completely exhausted.

Last night I couldn't sleep thinking about the moment in the alley.

As I look at my desk, I notice the extra activities the teacher gave me.Shit, I didn't do them. He's going to yell at me so much.

I get ready quickly, putting on my uniform and leaving it to tidy up later.I don't consider myself a sloppy girl, but I have a certain difficulty waking up on time.

With no time to eat, I grab my keys and activities, lock the front door and stuff the sheets into my backpack.

I run quickly through the city streets. It's small so I don't have much of a problem with speeding cars.

When suddenly the law of inertia sets in. Who am I kidding, it's just a non-embarrassing way of saying I slammed my face into someone's back.

I look up to see who I hit and apologize, but the words die in my mouth.

I don't know if it's great luck or great bad luck. They were beautiful, their eyes stared deep into my soul, as if they wanted to kill me. But one of them is extremely familiar, It's the boy with the bunny smile!"

He looks at me with great surprise, quickly coming closer to me and asking if I'm okay.Did he seem distressed, nervous, worried? I can't tell.

He notices me looking at the other two boys behind him, he smiles shyly and says.

"Of course." He walks away and goes next to the other two boys.

"hyngs this is the girl I told you about. She's the one who saved me yesterday."

He says pointing at me, then comes to my side. "___ these are my brothers, Jimin and Taehyung and I'm Jungkook"

He says, pointing to each one. Wait, how does he know my name?Apparently I asked that question out loud, because he answers me."It's written on your uniform."

There is, of course. I tell them it was nice to meet them but I was late for school. Their eyes light up.

"Look, we're going to the same campus as you. We can go together!"The boy, whose name is Taehyung if I'm not mistaken, says with a beautiful square smile.

I don't bother answering them and keep walking. But suddenly they seem to remember something.

They exchange distressed glances, walk in front of me and bow slightly. What are they doing?

"Thank you so much for saving Jungkook!"

They say it a little louder than they should, you can tell they feel bad for not thanking me sooner. God, how embarrassing.

"We are eternally grateful!" They said, raising their heads and coming closer, they looked desperate. What is happening?

"Yes! I owe you my life!" He says in a strange way.

"Hey hey! Oh my God, it was nothing, no need to exaggerate. Let's go to school soon, I'm already really late."

I walk ahead of them, not noticing the looks they give me, and their satisfied smiles."Hyngs, we found her."

Continued...

Not reviewed! Sorry for any mistakes!

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constesplanetarium · 1 year ago

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꧁•⊹٭𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙷𝚊𝚞𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝙼𝚊𝚗𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚘𝚏 𝙷𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝙲𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚘.٭⊹•꧂

☼⚠︎ Male! Yandere Ghosts/Spirit Harem x GN! AFAB! Reader (Part 2)

UPDATE!

Darkness rating ) 5/10: “Need a bandaid?”

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

part 1 is here!

WE ARE BACK W THE GHOST BOYS!!!! you get to meet the other two this time ;)

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

CONTENT WARNINGS!!!

General Yandere shenanigans (possessiveness, jealousy, aggression towards other guys, etc.), blood, violence, kidnapping.

Word count: Around 4.2k

⋆♱✮☽🦇☽✮♰⋆

A quick turn of your heel and you're off the way you came, almost tumbling down onto the carpet a couple of times. The spirit's laughter rings above you as you glance up, a bunch of small, blob-like figures in the air. They’re all grinning as you take a right, down another long corridor. You can feel the adrenaline pumping in your veins as you turn down another hallway, slowing down once you notice that the candles aren’t lit here. You reach for your flash-

Oh yeah. You left your backpack in the sewing room. You grumble and squint your eyes in the darkness, trying to let your eyes adjust quickly. Who the hell was the figure anyway? It didn’t look like Oliver or Austin. You lean against a wall and start to think to yourself.

Is there really any point in trying to escape from the courtyard anymore? Maybe you should break a window or something.

… With what fucking tools are you gonna break that window with? Maybe you can grab a candle holder or a hard book. But there’s still the broken glass issue.

Maybe it’s time to wave the white flag? Should you go find this Edmund yourself? None of these spirits have been hostile, nor have they tried to kill you.

Once you open your eyes, the pitch darkness meets you again, but it’s a bit clearer to see now. You take a glance to your left, then your right, and just start to wander aimlessly. The moonlight shining through the windows guides your way as you peer at every little door you see. This mansion is as big as a castle, isn’t it? Should you try calling Edmund’s name?

After a few minutes, you’re still walking, seeing the occasional servant spirit here and there. You can hear some giggles and cheers as you pass by, and at this point you’re just waving and smiling at the spirits. They’re surprisingly very sweet… Though, you did try to ask a few of them where Edmund was, and all they did was laugh and float away.

Then you take a sharp turn, and you jump at the sight of a familiar face. Not one you’ve talked with before, but one you’ve seen in the portraits. It looks like he’s looking around for something.

You look around for a place to hide and observe, but there's nothing you can use to hide in the hallway. He turns your way quickly, and you see some recognition in his eyes, but he scowls soon after.

“Oh, it’s you.” The guy grumbles and fists his hands in his pockets. His suit is similar to Olivers, but more tattered and ragged. Certain buttons are loose or missing altogether, and some of the frills on his sleeves are ripped. His caramel-like skin matches well with his messy, dark brown hair, and the red and gold of his tattered suit. “You’re the visitor, aren’t you?” A quick nod from you is all he needs for his mood to shift. His shoulders ease up and his eyes soften, a sigh leaving his mouth. “There’s no point in being too rough with you, I guess. Edmund would have my head if I did that.” So this is Dalton?

“That’s right.” he says, fidgeting with a loose button on his suit. “You must be looking for Edmund at this point.” It looks like he’s trying to hold back a chuckle, with the way he’s smiling. “Have you given up on leaving on your own accord?” You heave a long, tired sigh, but admit defeat with a slow nod, and his smile grows wider. “What a shame, but it’s less work for me. Come now.” At least he’s straight to the point, unlike the other two.

He isn’t very chatty, just walking aside you in silence as your footsteps are muffled by the carpet. You wish you could ask him questions about the mansion, but he probably wouldn’t answer you.

“Why’d you come here?” Ah, there’s a suspicious tone there. He’s trying to dig for info. You blabber out the same excuse that you gave Oliver, and he raises a brow.

“Oh really? Just curiosity?” He scoffs. “Now do you realize how stupid you are for coming here? After dealing with those two idiots, aren’t you-” A flash of embarrassment shows up on his features, but he shakes his head lightly and lets out a sigh. “Nevermind.”

Ugh. What’s his deal? You frown at the light insult he threw your way, and he registers your irritation. “I, erm…” He shakes his head again, and doesn’t say anything else. So no apology?

The very least he can do is answer a question you have.

“Possession? I’m sorry?” You explain to him what you felt during the time, but make sure not to go too into detail. Some things are better left private. You watch his face shift more and more into discontent. His breathing becomes heavy as he scowls. “It wasn’t a full possession by the way you’re explaining it. Only partial.” So a sort of half-possession? What the hell? “During a possession like that, it just lets you… Feel the person you're possessing.” So Alex wanted to touch you? Huh.

“Stop talking about him.” He snaps at you, and you flinch at his sudden outburst. “I don’t want to hear his fucking name come out your mouth. I don’t want to hear about him touching you, both him and Oliver, it’s disgusting.” What the fuck? “Treating the new visitor in that way, they can’t even go a day without satisfying their urges. They’re disgusting.” Giggles and soft shrieks ring above you as you look up, a bunch of spirits hearing him gossip about the other two. Once you catch them, they all start to laugh and vanish quickly. It looks like Dalton’s more angry at them being there than you, but he holds himself back from saying anything else.

Alright, never ask Dalton any questions. That’s a good mental note.

Both of you are silent again for the next few seconds, until he points to a double door on your right. You walk up and tug on the handle, but it doesn’t budge. His soft chuckling rings in your head as grabs the opposite handle, a small click signaling to you that it's open as he pulls on it.

You peer inside to be met with a dark and gloomy, yet beautiful study. The moonlight illuminates the room enough for you to see decently well. Books are strewn all over the place, and papers as well. There’s the regular sofa and chair, with a small table set in the middle. Around the right corner, there’s a desk and a couple of quills that seem unused. This mansion has a lot of studies, huh? You wonder how many people really lived here in the mansion.

Until, y’know, the haunting.

“You didn’t get to spend a lot of time with either of them, right?” Once you walk into the room and agree, a small smile creeps onto his face, but he covers it with his hand, grunting a bit. “Mm, okay.” A small, shaky sigh leaves him as he sits down. “We won’t be distracted then.” Relief velvets his voice as he takes a seat and leans back on the sofa. Ah, so he was planning something after all. You smirk and take a seat next to him, asking him just that.

“Well, it’s not like you have anything better to do.” He says. “Both of them just wasted your time anyway. They had ample time to take you to Edmund, yet they didn’t.” He clenches his fist and utters a small curse. “It’s only fair that I get my turn.” He whispers, and you can’t help but feel your life may potentially be in danger now.

But do you care?

“So what? Are you playing with their hearts or something?” He takes a glance at you to see your reaction, and you shake your head in a refusal. “Even if you were, it’s likely they wouldn’t be able to tell for a while. They’re idiots.” Your eyes can't help but analyze his demeanor, noticing every twitch and shake of his hands is kind of interesting. Does he hate them that much?

His hands ease at your question, and he stares at you with sincerity. “I, ah,” His fingers clasp together, and he rubs his left thumb on his right, an uneasy look in his eyes. “I consider hate to be a… Strong word.” It looks like he’s uncomfortable.

Best not to push.

With a small shake of your head, you reach over to rub his thigh comfortingly, but your hand phases right through, and you start to shiver. It’s still confusing how sometimes you can touch them and other times you can’t. Dalton grabs your wrist and raises your hand up a little, setting it back on his thigh. You can never get over that cold feeling all of them have.

“I don’t need your pity, but thank you.” He murmurs, rubbing your hand slowly. “It’s not a sensitive topic by any means, it’s just a bit… Embarrassing, I suppose.” Dalton smiles at you, with a certain softness in his eyes. “I’ll tell you more about it later.”

Hey, this small talk isn’t so bad. You can feel your nerves to relax, taking the chance to sink into the soft sofa, and he looks over at you.

“I’m better than Alex and Oliver, aren’t I?” He says. You tilt your head a bit at the sudden question. Is he trying to make himself look better? He notices your confusion and his smile grows wider. “Oh, it’s nothing.”

Nothing, huh?

He bites his lip as you stare at him, shuffling around in place. You can’t see well, but you can see him enough to the point where you watch his chest rise up and down faster. “Don’t look at me like that. Please.” He grasps his left hand in his right, rubbing his palm with his thumb. “It’ll be hard to hold myself back.”

After a couple of seconds, it doesn’t take him long to fold at all, as he scoots closer yo you, caressing your cheek. “You would make a beautiful painting.” Dalton speaks quietly, like he’s afraid someone will hear him. “You’re like a flower.” Strangely, that's a cute compliment coming from him. You smile up at him and embrace him, feeling his cold aura and body around you. Lord, it’s like you're hugging a snowman.

Might as well embrace these boys at this point.

His cold tongue slips against yours as he kisses you, breaking the kiss to nibble desperately at your bottom lip. “Let me just be with you a little longer before I take you to Edmund. I won’t do that possession thing that they did. I’m better than those two, aren’t I?” It’s debatable. You’re not sure if you would really care at this point. “Right?” Plus, he’s really damn cold… “You smell so nice, you taste so good, I can’t…” Dalton groans as you rub your hand against his crotch, moving it up and down to gain some friction.

His hips buck slowly against your hand, savoring every feeling as he moans softly in your ear. “You’re so warm, oh…” A stupid grin spreads on your face as you look up at him. He looks so euphoric, it’s pretty funny.

Also pretty damn hot.

Dalton jumps as both of you turn your heads to the bookshelf on the side of the room. A bunch of books had just fallen and hit the ground with a loud thud.

“What the hell…” He whines as you move your hand from his crotch, and you glance up at the ceiling instinctively.

Oh.

It looks like you both had some voyeurs.

“You damn…” Dalton hisses and climbs off of you, standing up. “None of you can give me a moment's peace, huh?!” Dalton yells angrily at the spirits above you two, fits of shrieks and laughter filling the room. All the spirits vanish at once, leaving you and Dalton in an embarrassing silence.

Damn spirits, cockblocking you.

“Ugh.” He clicks his tongue and looks back at you, clearly displeased. “... Let me take you to Edmund now, yes?”

Unfortunately, yes.

“There you are, darling!” Oliver’s voice rings out as you feel his chill body push against yours once he pulls you into a tight bear hug. “I thought I told you to wait in the library? What’re you doing with-” He glares at Dalton. “Him?”

“I found them wandering the hallway after you did such a terrible job of taking care of them, Oliver.” Dalton snaps at him. Both of them glare at each other, until Alex has to break the ice.

“Let the visitor go, Ollie. Edmund needs to see them.” Alex grumbles and Oliver hesitantly lets you go, glaring at both men as he stands by your side. You finally get a look at the man in the middle of the room, seated in a large chair behind a desk. There are so many studies here, huh?

“I finally get to meet you, visitor. I’ve been waiting quite some time, you know?” A calm, cheerful voice rings out from him, and he gives you a bright smile.

He has medium length black hair, alongside an odd monocle as he waves over to you with a white gloved hand, covering his tan skin. His black suit is more fancy than Oliver’s and Daltons combined, covered in gold and silver engravings all over, tied up nicely together with a black rose pin right above his heart. There’s some light stubble on his face, and you can automatically tell he’s a bit older than everyone else in the room. Perhaps around late twenties to early thirties before his death day?

“Please, sit.” He points to the chair across from him, and you can hear Oliver and Dalton behind you as you take a seat. Edmund peers up at the two, “Excuse me, I’d like to speak with the visitor alone, please.” His smile widens as you hear the light groans of annoyance of Oliver, and a small click of the tongue from Dalton. You take a small glance at Alex to see his face shift into one of annoyance, “Oh.” But he looks down at you and flashes you a quick smile before taking his leave.

“I’ll see you later, okay?” Oliver rubs your shoulder before taking his leave as well, and Dalton just nods at you before following Oliver out.

“Good riddance, am I right?” Edmund chuckles as the door shuts loudly behind them all, making you jump. “I’m only kidding.” A loud lock of the knob makes you feel a bit uneasy. If this is the big boss of them all, who knows what he could do? “Please don't be frightened. I’d just rather not be interrupted while conversing with you.” You bite the inside of your lip and wait for him to speak some more.

“I didn’t even get to introduce myself. It seems that everyone else has done that job for me, but I’d prefer to do it properly.” He rises up from his seat, bending over the table as he reaches his hand out. “I’m Edmund, as you know. Edmund Castiello.” You take his hand, surprised at how warm it is compared to the other men. Is it because of his gloves? He brings it up to his lips, kissing the back of your palm gently. “Pleased to make your acquaintance, visitor.” He takes his seat again, interlacing his fingers and placing them under his chin, his elbows resting on the table. “I do hope none of them gave you too much trouble?”

You wish.

“Ah,” Edmund laughs and claps his hands together. “They all got too excited that you’re here, I presume? They’ve always been a rowdy bunch. Please excuse their behavior. I’ll chastise all of them for it later.” You shake your head and stammer out an excuse for all of them. Rowdy, sure. But it wasn’t like you had a bad time with each of them…

“Are you sure?” He frowns. “Treating a guest with such…” He pauses, fidgeting with his gloves. “Rude, and not to mention inappropriate behavior isn’t tolerated here.” You laugh it off with a smile, and his shoulders seem to ease up from your laughter. “Very well.”

Oh. Speaking of all of them, shouldn’t you mention the possession?

Yeah.

“Possessing? But only partially?” He sighs and fidgets with a lock of his hair. “Ah, yes. Our way of connecting with humans and creatures alike.”

Connecting?

“We just call it partial possession,” he starts. “It’s nothing too extravagant. It just allows us spirits to be able to really touch the person we’re possessing. If it were a full possession, we would just take control over your whole body in general.” He drags a gloved finger down the desk slowly. “We can control your actions to some extent, but if you really do fight it, it can be broken easily.” He sighs. “It looks like Oliver hit you harder than Alex. He has always been a bit more aggressive and eccentric.”

… Oliver? He possessed you?

“Oh? You… You don’t remember?” A frown spreads onto his face, followed by a short sigh and a small face palm. “It was your first time being possessed, of course you don’t remember.” The air around you two suddenly becomes thick, and you shuffle into your seat uncomfortably. “He had told me about it, but I had no idea you didn’t-” He clenches his fist, and takes a heavy breath in and out in an attempt to calm himself. “I’ll punish him for that later.” He whispers, returning his gaze back to you. “I’m sorry. Please, continue.”

It’s not like you were really fighting the possession though, so…?

“When you saw the lights flicker, it distracted your mind from the situation at hand. That’s why it broke the possession. Since it was your…” He clears his throat. “First time, I can only assume it was because Oliver can’t properly possess yet. In Alexander’s case, I guess your urge to leave overpowered the fact that you wanted to ride his cock.” Your face warms up as you break eye contact with Edmund. You can hear him softly tapping on his desk, and you feel him bare a hole in your head with just his gaze. He doesn’t seem pleased.

“It’s natural to feel that way towards someone you find attractive.” He says softly, in a sort of sweet tone that makes you start to melt in your seat. “Don’t be too hard on yourself, beloved.” He tries to smile, but you can tell he’s still bothered by your attraction to Alex. “Back to the topic of Possession, yes? Let me demonstrate.”

Oh? Of course, he wants his turn, too. Are you going to keep being passed around like this?

… Eh. You don’t really care.

“Now, see how when I touch you, it feels warmer?” He rises up and bends over the table, almost knocking over a small bottle of ink you didn’t see at first. He sets a gloved hand on your heart, and then he drags his finger down from your shoulder to your chest, and you sigh in content. God, that feels good. “Hmm.” He pushes his seat back with his foot, and it bumps into the bookshelf behind it with a loud bang. This doesn't seem to phase him as he comes up to your side and cups your cheek, forcing you to look at him. “Are you not scared, beloved?”

Considering the fact that this is your fourth time at things, no.

“How odd.” Your reaction, or lack thereof, doesn’t seem to deter him as he leans in close, kissing you on your forehead. Your eyes widen at the unexpected gesture. Your forehead instead of your lips?

“I can wait my turn. For the right moment.” His small smile breaks into a grin, pleased at your reaction as the warmness fades from your body. He leans against his desk and lets out a sigh. “Though, it is difficult to hold myself back… Do you feel the same way?”

You give him a small smile, and he fixes his gloves around the wrist. “Well then, it’s time to…” He seems lost in thought for a moment, but he turns his gaze back to you with a familiar smile. “Reconcile with the group, yes? I wish I didn’t have to cut this short so early, but it’s quite urgent.”

“Darling!” Oliver waves happily as you step into the main exit hall. It looks like he was waiting for you eagerly at the entrance, similar to a puppy, while Alex was standing off to the side, looking around as he mindlessly pet Pochi’s head. Dalton was leaning against the wall, fidgeting with the buttons on his suit again. There are another two statues on the outside of the door, the same creatures you couldn’t comprehend last time, but now as you get a better look at it, it might be a sort of feline. Just by peering out the window beside the door, you can tell it's the courtyard. There are several flower beds outside, and maybe even a greenhouse, but that's all you can really see from here.

“Welcome back.” Dalton hums and stops leaning on the wall, making his way over to you. Oliver does the same.

“Hello.” And so does Alex in the middle. They’re even more intimidating once you bunch them up and let them get as close to you as they are right now.

“Give the visitor space, will you?” Edmund says behind you, setting a hand on your shoulder as he shoos away the other boys with a motion of his hand. They all grumble incoherently and take a step back.

“I do hope you had a nice time today.” He rubs your shoulder and swivels around so he’s standing in front of you.

Finally getting a good look at all of them together, you tilt your head a bit. They all look like a pretty good unit together. A team. Maybe a family?

You find yourself filled with a soft, warm feeling as you brush the thought off. It’s just you piecing things in your head that aren’t real.

From what you’ve seen so far, these boys literally hate each other. Except for Edmund.

Welp, it was fun while it lasted. Time to go home.

“Home?” Alex tilts his head, and Pochi’s head seems to bob to the side as well. “What do you mean?”

What?

Oh.

Of course.

That’s what Edmund meant when he said he can “wait his turn”.

As soon as you stepped into the mansion, you were bound here.

“Did you think you were leaving?” Dalton says, looking at you with a sort of pity. Something inside you wanted to hold onto that hope, but…

“Oh, poor, poor beloved. I’m sorry for not telling you.” Edmund cooes and holds the sides of your head lovingly, running his freezing fingers through your hair. Everything feels so much colder. It hurts a little, like it’s pricking into your skin. “It’s okay, it’s only for a little while. We all just love you here so much, in such a short amount of time. You’re a very interesting person, see,” He leans in close, whispering against your lips with a shaky breath. “Let us continue watching you.”

There’s a sudden ringing in your head, to the point where you can feel a small trickle of blood pour out. Your eyes roll back in the back of your head as you aggressively cough out spurts of blood, all of it spilling out onto the carpet, staining it with a dark crimson. You can’t see what’s around you anymore. Your vision is so blurry. Everything hurts. It hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts

“We’ll be here when you wake up, beloved.” It hurts. “Alex, watch over them.”

Your body is so weak you can’t even protest, and you fall into a cold grasp of a familiar blonde-headed man. All he does is smile down at you as your world fades to black.

part 3 is here!

ミ★ 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴. ★彡

sorry for not posting in a week, i got hit w a mean burnout. had to make this part a little shorter so i could get it out

BUT IM BACK!!

ill prolly work on the 3rd part in a bit

PS. it’s olivers part, you spend the day w him :]

its in the order you met them, so next its alex, then dalton, and then edmund <3

ngl, im really in love with these characters already. i think after this series is done i might drop the yandere aspect and flesh them out as real oc’s of mine w deeper lore <3

OR I CAN DO BOTH LIKE WRITE THEM W AND WITHOUT YANDERE ASPECTS IF YALL WANT!!!

#yandere #yandere x reader #male yandere #x gn reader #yandere oc #yandere oc x reader #dead dove do not eat #male yandere x reader #obsessive yandere #yandere ocs #yandere ghost

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sadceline · 1 month ago

Text

THE ENHYPEN HOST || 21

|| Reverse harem || ft. TXT, Mingyu (Seventeen) & BTS

WARNINGS: foul language, explicit content, group sex, humiliation, sex in public, threesome, foursoome, rough sex, red flags, immoral acts, unprotected sex, morbid jealousy, comedy, parody, possessiveness, violent quarrels, arguments, betrayals, lies, femdom sometimes.

GENRE: +18, reverse harem, comedy, enemy to lovers, friends to lovers

INDEX (Chapters order)

I'm literally covered in Sunghoon's cum, I've got it in my hair, on my face, on both my breasts, but most of all… he keeps coming out of me as he continues to fuck me. I'm bent over in front of him, he's got me by the waist and by my hair, which he's twisted around his right hand.

"Fuck, you won't be able to walk."

I just gasp as I feel him come in my stomach for the umpteenth time for several long seconds. It's amazing he's got so much of it.

He pulls it out and lets go of me. He looks at me as I collapse between his legs, then smiles.

"Are you tired? Although… - he says under breath - you left something here." He sighs and pushes his long cock towards me.

I swallow, I'm not afraid at all, in fact… After everything he's done to me in the last few hours, I've succumbed to him so much that it seems the least I can do is return the favour.

"How does it… - I ask, rising weakly before crawling towards him - still be hard." "It's always this way because of you." He replies amusedly, stroking my head gently, letting a strand of my hair slip through his fingers.

I am now on my knees in front of him, taking his cock in my mouth, first helping myself with my hand, but then he moves his wrist and looks at me seriously as I raise my eyes to his in confusion. I can't do it without a little help at first.

"Shit. - He swears, biting his lip as he looks down at me. - You're so beautiful."

"Open sesame" I hear, wanting to please him even more. I take him in my mouth, wrapping my tongue around his thickness as much as I can and start to move my head more confidently.

"Ah… yes, clean it all up."

Even when he talks dirty, he doesn't use any swear words, he's never vulgar. He called me slut several times when we were not fucking, rather than during it. It's almost as if I have to earn that.

I start to go deeper and deeper, although it is really difficult for me because of his size. The more he moans, the more I am spurred on to continue and improve, I want him to go mad again, this time because of me.

"You like it so much, don't you? No… you're not tired yet. F-fuck…."

I realise I'm choking because I'm going too fast. I try to pull it out, to keep him from getting in the back of my throat and choking me, but all his cum ends up on my tongue and part of my lips.

I raise my eyes, he stares at me, even though he's just come for the umpteenth time, I pull my tongue out to show him what he's done, then I swallow it and he rolls his eyes in surprise. I lick my lips, too, to collect it all.

"Shit… shit, I'm going to have a heart attack, Amanda!" He shouts in surprise.

I manage to smile before collapsing on the floor, brain dead. He bends down, grabs my shoulders, lets me lean against him and for several minutes nothing happens.

He just lets me rest against him.

"You… you did well." He tells me after a while. "You're the worst…" I pant, but I cling to him. He does the same with his arm, pulling me close. "I know."

I don't know how much time passes, all I know is that eventually he lifts me up and holds me like a bride.

"Come on, let's take a shower."

This is how it really happens. All the while, in the not-so-clear showers of the women's changing room at the ice rink, Sunghoon rubs me with the sponge he took out of his duffel bag.

The water running over me is very warm, I feel really relaxed, I don't even have to move as he takes care of gently massaging and lathering every inch of my body. I feel really exhausted, it's been so intense it doesn't seem real.

For a while it really did feel like the last time.

I try to distract myself, but I don't even want to count the times he came between Wonyoung and me today. It's scary, not human, unnatural.

But I don't even want to think about it too much, I like feeling his chest when I rest my neck on his, I like how, even though he doesn't kiss me directly, he keeps resting his lips on my shoulders, on my back, while his still-bearded cock presses against my back.

"Are you all right?" I ask in a whisper. He smiles, but not sarcastically as usual. "Why? Are you worried about me?" "That sounds like the answer of someone who is fine."

We both laugh, albeit briefly, because after soaping me completely, he hugs me from behind, partially covering my face with his arms as he leans against my head.

"I wish we didn't have to come back."

Actually, I wish I did too.

I know this is the last shift, and I know that after today things will change.

I'm probably going to leave, although I don't think he's realised that yet… he looks worried.

When we get out of the shower, while he is still naked, Sunghoon covers me with several towels. He puts a bigger one over my shoulders, while with the smaller one he squeezes them a bit, to collect the excess water.

"Do you find me beautiful with my make-up off?" I ask him, before he starts blow-drying my hair. He's behind me, but we both see each other in the mirror in front of us. "No, not at all. - He replies, with the expression of someone who has done nothing wrong. - You're ugly as hell."

I honestly don't understand why he would give me such an answer, while he is obviously taking care of me, drying my hair, even putting his stupid expensive creams in it.

"I've always been told otherwise." I say. He twists his lips, I can see it. "Who?" "You don't know them." "Ah… then I don't care. - He replies almost offended. - If I don't know them, they are below my level, and certainly far from you." "You are rather jealous of a very ugly girl." "In fact, I advise you to always show your make-up around the house. Even outside, you should only show your made-up face to me."

Damn… he made me blush. When he sees that I don't react, he chuckles contentedly. Then he turns on the hairdryer and the hot air blast pampers me along with his fingers, caressing my curls and rolling them between them.

It's a good thing, because I wouldn't have known what to say.

When I am completely dry, he gives me one of his 'spare' pullover. My jumper is too wet, I risk getting sick, he says, and continues to be thoughtful….

"Are you sure there were no cams?" I ask as we leave the back of the building that leads to the car park where only Sunghoon's car is parked. "They gave me the keys to this place. I turned off the cameras myself." "That was risky." I remind him worriedly. "But nice."

I can't answer.

In the car, he even opens the door for me. He buckles me in, but doesn't look me in the eye. He's sad again, no, probably just serious - I'm fantasising too much.

We don't speak, not even after we've left. He's lost in thought, you can tell, I'm really too tired and the fear of the consequences of what happened in there makes me run away in my sleep. He notices but does not wake me.

In fact, when I opened my eyes, I did so spontaneously and noticed that the car had already stopped. Sunghoon was staring at me, as if he wanted to say something, but I didn't think he would.

We looked at each other for a few seconds and then looked away.

"You're awake." "I'm sorry…" "I didn't let you sleep so your sorry." I remain silent, bowing my head in respect. "Thank you for what you said to me today. - I say, even though my voice is shaking. - I, however, can't… I can't say that I have forgiven you. Sorry." He sneers, unbelieving, wistful. "You're sorry because you can't forgive me?" "I'm sorry… because I'm so guilty myself." "Things will change, you know? - He looks at me, finally, and I look back. - Things…" "Please. I… I am an engene before I am your host! - I find the courage to say, even though I can barely stand the game of glances, collapsing like an amateur. - What I want more than anything is for you to shine as you deserve. I need that. Please, please, Heeseung… and you… should be friends! - I take both his hands and shake them. - Heeseung is lonely and you know that. There are things you'll never be able to do that Heeseung can… but there are things you'll always be the best at because you don't even have to force yourself to do them.

Sunghoon gives me a serious, unyielding look, then swallows.

"I won't give up on you." "I'll be leaving soon."

His gaze changes, damn it, and it's frightening how quickly.

"What do you mean?" "I don't… - I push my hands away, a little scared. - I can't stay." "You want Heeseung to pay the debt? I told you, I can do it too, but if Hybe finds out, will send you to….. I don't know, Mexico!"

I laugh, but I'm actually too sad. Does he still think about Heeseung? He's really obsessed with him, maybe even in love. And here I was hoping he was with Suno…..

"No, Sunghoon. I… c-c-consider that I should stop working with you."

This time, his expression doesn't just frighten me, it completely petrifies me. I am truly scary by his dark gaze, at this time of night, locked in his car in the building's car park.

"Do you want to go to TXT?" "Are you… are you joking, right?" "What the hell do you think would happen if you left?" "I'm in too deep. - I admit, looking him in the eye even though I'm literally shaking. - If my presence can cause damage to something that is very important to me… I… have few things I care about very much. If I could go back…" "You like Enhypen more than fucking them?" "What a gentleman you are. - I comment disgustedly, he smiles amusedly, but quickly turns serious again. - Anyway, yes, it's possible." "If you're asking my opinion - he says after a while - I think you're better off shagging people I've known long enough. You're in the wrong business now, it'll take a while to get out of it and it won't be easy to shut those TXT fuckers up, but… it can be done. Wash your dirty laundry at home, right? This will definitely cause problems, but we're all so attached to our nice things, our nice clothes, that we'll make it work." "What about me?- I ask quickly. - Should I just stand there and hope it doesn't fall apart?" "You should use this time to find out who you want."

I look at him, unable to answer.

"Even if it were me, I couldn't protect you except by keeping you close to me. I'm not strong enough, no one can do it properly. But if you stay close, it'll be easier to hide you."

I sigh, lowering my sad gaze as I nervously run my palms down my thighs. The things he says make me particularly tense, he really does speak as if he cares, and yet it still feels absurd.

"I won't choose anyone. Not now, not ever." "Then resist me and break my heart if you can. - He tells me, in the tone of advice. - But don't go anywhere."

I don't know what to say, I feel like I could cry at any moment, but he doesn't give me the time. He strokes my cheek and kisses me one last time, his kisses are so warm, the warmth spreads slowly but intensely through my body, and to say he is such a block of ice is usually the wrong thing to say.

"Shall we go?" I ask, the second he pulls away from me. I know my question has offended him, but I did it on purpose, I wanted him to stop. "Are you in a hurry?" He asks annoyed. "The longer we stay here, the less… I want to come back." "You want to stay with me? That's fine, we can even sleep outside, I'll book a room." "I-I didn't say that. - I stammer, embarrassed and a little offended. - Stop please, ok?" "Pick me, Amanda." I laugh, nervously. "You'll get tired of this before I do that."

He doesn't answer right away, I don't know what his expression is because I'm not looking at him.

"Want to bet?" He just asks, taking the keys out of the ignition of the car, which turns off.

I don't dare answer. We got out of the car in silence, he followed me, then we got into the lift. It was late at night. Neither of us had anything more to say, or perhaps we both preferred to remain silent at that moment, which seemed darker than it probably was.

When we got back, Sunghoon used his keys to open the door, but he let me in first. How gallant…

I wasn't expecting it, but all six of them are sitting around the lounge table, drinking beer and soju, there are snacks on the table, but they look untouched.

As soon as I return, I look for Heeseung's eyes: I didn't find it, he looked away, almost as if he knew, as if he was avoiding me. Melancholy, later I find Jongseong's eyes, worried but also angry.

Next to him, Jake looked at me calmly, as if he expected nothing else from me. Jungwon smiles, which makes me uncomfortable, but I have to admit that smile is quite sensual. Sunoo, next to him, sips his glass of beer undisturbed, but when I look for his gaze, I find it immediately and he seems pleased. Niki, who's been on his phone almost the whole time we've been here, just looks confused and amused.

"Let's talk." Jay says.

I stop spontaneously. Sunghoon sighs behind me, then grabs my shoulders, Heeseung notices and turns around, I lower my eyes as he gently pushes me towards the low table and makes me sit on the floor.

"Let's talk." Sunghoon repeats, sitting next to me, close enough to rest the back of his thigh against mine. "We talked, we… exchanged opinions." Jay says in a rather sarcastic tone. "Without me." He reminds him of the peer next to me. "That's really funny." Riki comments, looking at them almost pitifully. Sunghoon looks at him coldly, Heeseung smiles unnerved. "It is, but let's talk about concrete things. The shift thing won't work, the council thinkers claim." The minor smiles amusedly. "Then we cancel it?" "Oh, no. That's the funny thing - Heeseung continues - they… have a pretty good idea. While Jay's dating Amanda's friend, you're dating Wonyoung, Jungwon's been dating Hanni for about two years, and Sunoo, he…. - laughs, even more nervous - he's also dating someone! He hasn't evenparticipated, but they all agree on that." "This what?" Sunghoon asks more seriously now. "Let's cancel the shifts. - He shouts with Jungwon's usual smile. - We can keep them, but you would have to give up yours and I'm sure you would never do that. Am I right?" "Explain yourself better, Jungwon." Man, that's scary, Sunghoon. "Let Amanda help us, in no particular order. With whomever she feels like, whenever she wants… - he explains, I can tell he's about to say something dangerous, he's even struggling to say the words himself, but he seems so amused that it makes me really uncomfortable. - Still, she should not refuse. Of course, if she agrees, but… that would solve everything. If we behave well and don't bother her too much, if she can't choose who to favour, everything will be fine, and it will be much more professional".

For several seconds I cannot tell if what I have just heard is an auditory hallucination. You… He didn't really say all that, did he, Jungwon?

Okay, funny. Really, ten out of ten for originalit - Sunghoon replies, grabbing my wrist and pulling me up. - We'll sleep in hotel tonight, tomorrow, if you're clear…" "You don't decide." Jungwon reminds him. Jongseong looks at us, I can see an almost imperceptible smile on his face, a mischievous grin. "Fortunately, the majority decides. Or it could just choose the leader. I don't know if that's convenient." Sunghoon looks at Heeseung, who seems completely impassive. "Aren't you going to do anything? You're the oldest!" "You don't understand the situation. - The elder answers in a whisper. - You don't decide, she does."

Sunghoon turns to me, stares at me for a long time, but I don't know what to say, so he lets go of my wrist and turns to his bandmates.

"Sunoo, what the fuck?! Why do you agree?!" The minor smiles amusedly and puts down his glass. "Why shouldn't I? Isn't it to my advantage, too? I could be a breath of fresh air for Amanda noona." Hoon doesn't seem to have expected such a reaction, he remains silent for a few seconds, then turns to Jake. "You always make the worst choices, don't you?" Jaeyun smiles, but is annoyed and quickly changes his expression. "Don't bother me. I've had enough of you and your women, I don't want boona to be one of them." "Noona?" He repeats in disbelief. "She likes to be called that. Don't you know?"

Oh. I've gone all red, this isn't the time to be embarrassed about these things, dammit!

"Sit down, Amanda." Jay says to me in his warmest voice.

Even though I know that this will break Sunghoon's heart, should he actually have one, I walk past Sunghoon after a few seconds of thinking and sit down at the table. The one who stands up is Heeseung, but also abruptly.

"Don't do it, Amanda." He tells me, it's an order. "Do you realise that if you don't, it will become more and more difficult to keep you with us? - Jungwon explains, becoming more serious, perhaps for the first time. - We… want you here, understand?" He says this as his cunning gaze squares me until I feel naked and helpless in front of him. "If we pay the debt, they'll send you to the farthest country, if we end the contract, you'll work somewhere else. - Jay continues with a sigh. - We don't want that." "If you stay here, you'll be safe." Jake finally explains, although he doesn't look at me. Jungwon bites his lips in amusement, then takes my hand in both of his and squeezes it. "You can set all the limits you want, except that… to… refuse you. Unless there are medical problems, of course! - He reassures me, as if he's talking about something completely normal. Then he shakes my hand a little more and his eyes become even more puppy-dog eyes. - After all, it's fun… and you're our fan, so I'm sure you'll enjoy it… helping us maintain our well-being."

I swallow, just hearing him talk like that makes me excited again.

"Ok, shall we make it like an opening ceremony?" Riki suggests with his sensual volatility as he gets down on his knees. "Fuck, you guys are crazy, aren't you?" Sunghoon asks with a nervous half-smile. "An opening ceremony?" Sunoo ignores him and looks at the minor. The Japanese boy begins to laugh in amusement, then lowers his gaze to his crotch, hymming something very unorthodox. "Well… all together, in the name of friendship." "Oh my God." Jay comments in disgust. Sunoo bursts out laughing, as does Jungwon, although for a few seconds he turns and looks at me strangely. "Let's do it, come on." Jake is speechless. "You… oh my… that's disgusting. You're a fucking child!" "I'm not!" Riki replies curtly.

Heeseung stares at him for several seconds, his gaze is icy, it sends shivers down my spine, but not only that… Then he turns to Sunghoon, the two of them staring at each other in silence, but I lower my gaze, intimidated.

"Amanda will sleep with Sunoo tonight." Heeseung says, massaging the space between his eyebrows as he tries to stay calm. "After the ceremony?" The unconscious Niki asks. "Say it again. - Heeseung raises his voice and looks menacingly at the maknae. - Look at Sunghoon's face, I'll make it much worse for you." "Come on, why don't do it, hyung?" The younger man replied. "It's still my turn. - Sunghoon says seriously, interrupting them thankfully, because Heeseung doesn't seem to be joking at all. - I want to finish it off." "I haven't had a full twenty-four hours either, get over it." Jay replies. "No problem for me, I can accommodate her before or after the ceremony." Sunoo laughs. "Amanda, the advice I gave you. Forget it." Sunghoon says behind my back. "What advice?" Jungwon asks curiously. "I changed my mind, completely. It was nonsense, you'll go to China or somewhere else." "What advice?" Heeseung asks in a darker tone. "Let's do it." I say suddenly.

They are all silent for a few seconds, I have a tired look on my face.

"Are you kidding? - Heeseung shouts. - I said I'll pay. I said I'll take care of it." "You don't have to do that. - I say with an edge in my voice. - I have nothing to do with you, look at me. - I'm being rhetorical. - I did it with Sunghoon and also with…. Niki. Why would you… it's humiliating for you. Don't do it. It's not worth it…"

I can't bring myself to meet his gaze, afraid his expression could easily tear my heart apart. I'm a bad person, whether he's that bad or not, he should know.

"Did you do it with Yeonjun and Soobin?" He asks me, as if it matters in any way. I don't answer right away, everyone stares at me, Riki laughs. "Go ahead, answer." Sunghoon urges me not so gently. "No… but what does it matter?"

Heeseung sighs and looks almost relieved. Sunghoon and Jay seem to do the same.

"It does matter." The three repeat with a dazed expression. "Glad you trusted her instead of asking who was there." He remembers Riki, who I look at confused, no, scared. Heeseung looks at him and purses his lips. "Yes, I believe her." "And you do well, Hyung. I would never let them do to her what I would have done to her."

Heeseung quick to violence, at least that's what I could see, but he still stops, perhaps because the one in front of him is still his maknae, the youngest. But the look he gives him… it's hard to describe how much fear he gives me.

"So… shall we officially end the fifth round?" Jungwon suggests. "Let's do it." Sunoo smiles and looks at Sunghoon, who for some reason can't answer in front of him. Jay swallows, struggling. He looks at Jungwon, he knows him very well, he seems annoyed by his behaviour. "Should we?" "Why should she sleep with Sunoo? Shouldn't she be able to choose where she sleeps?" Jake asks, already assuming that the fifth round will indeed end here. "Do you think she would sleep with you?" Riki teases him, sitting on the floor leaning on his palms.

Jungwon bursts out laughing and puts a hand on Jake's shoulder to stop him from getting up and hitting him. Sunoo just laughs, I'm just in shock.

"Do you want to, Noona? - Jungwon comes up to my ear and willingly places his lips on it. - Tomorrow we'll make all the rules, but tonight… are you ready? Has Sunghoon taken your strength?"

The way he whispers in my ear, the way his voice spreads through my brain, awakening primal instincts, immediately throws me off track.

As I try to hold my breath (I don't even know why), he notices and laughs.

"I… I don't… I don't think… " Jay has been watching us for a while, he's obviously annoyed. "Jungwon, what are you doing?"

Sunghoon approaches and notices, maybe because he's done nothing but watch Heeseung so far. He abruptly pulls Jungwon away and Jungwon resents it, Heeseung also approaches us and I involuntarily lower my shoulders as if to make myself smaller. I don't know what's going on and I'm afraid of what might happen.

"Ouch, hyung! I'm smaller but bigger. Don't make me angry." He says this in a joking tone, but he seems to be seriously annoyed. "I'd like to… sleep here." I admit, trying to restore order. "No, that's no good." Riki says, as if he had no obvious second ends.

Heeseung sighs, makes space between us and then grabs my arm with such force that it lifts me up, I'm scared, I admit, it's starting to scare me, it hurts. I don't like it. Sunghoon just did the same thing, but he was gentler.

I can tell he's really nervous, I don't like it at all.

As I stand up, I pull my arm away from his grasp just as abruptly, and he looks me in the eye, seemingly angry, but then seems to turn away unarmed, betraying some concern. Sunghoon lifts the sleeve of his sweatshirt, which I'm still wearing, to see if he's left a mark on me, but Heeseung looks away in annoyance.

"Let's talk for a moment, please." "Wait until tomorrow then." Sunghoon reminds him. "He can't even talk to me when she wants to?" The younger man glares at him; I never said I wanted to, but he takes it for granted. "Not on my shift." "It's not your shift anymore, haven't you heard?"

I sigh tiredly, I can't take it anymore, this day seems to never end. I look at Sunoo, he is smiling but I can still see some annoyance in his expression.

"I think noona is uncomfortable. - He says in a cheerful but mischievous tone. - Should she sleep with me? Do you want to, noona?" "Y-Yes." I nod quickly. "You don't even want to talk to me?" Sunghoon asks me.

I scamper ridiculously between them, standing behind the backs of Jay and Jungwon, who don't move and remain in front of me.

"I-I just want my phone."

Sunghoon remains speechless, Heeseung starts to laugh out loud.

"Go to sleep, both of you." Jay sighs. Jungwon goes up to his ear and covers his mouth from the side of the two bandmates, letting me see what he's about to say as he looks at me amusedly out of the corner of his eye. "Shouldn't he sleep with you? After all, you are the most serious of us, and Sunoo is younger."

I swallow and look down, pretending not to have heard, even though it's obvious that I have. I've heard everything and I don't even despise the idea… but it's not out of any ulterior motives, it's just that for some reason I think Sunoo has it in for me, and I also think that the only person I could talk to about how I feel is Jay, only he, maybe… would be willing to listen to me.

"No way." Heeseung replies. "Jay hyung is dating with his friend, nothing will happen." Jungwon reassures them, rightly in my opinion. "No way." The eldest repeats, looking his dongsaeng, who has the serious and unyielding look as if they were the same age. "You don't decide that, she does." Jay sighs and turns to me. "Really… don't you want to talk to me" Sunghoon asks me, seriously, no, even wistfully. I swallow, swallowing the lump in my throat and trying to fight the urge to cry. "I just wish… it wasn't a competition. I can talk to anyone."

Sunghoon does not answer me, but takes a step back and literally leaves the room to go to his room. Judging by the silence that follows, I don't think I'm the only one surprised by his behaviour.

"Oh, how cute - Heeseung sneers, although he has such an icy stare when he looks at me - did you delude him?" I lower my eyes, not sure if I did anything like that, but I know he is offended and disappointed to me and that makes me sad. "It's none of your business." "I apologised for earlier, but now we need to talk."

I still sigh, I can't deny him, but I'm still worried about Sunghoon. He left in a strange way, looking so nervous.

"N-no, you didn't. But I'd like to say something…'' - I try to steady myself as all eyes are on me - I… I hope this won't be misunderstood, but… couldn't we just finish the shift? Things will be different tomorrow and we're definitely not going to do anything tonight, but c-couldn't we create any more…"

Only now do I realise how stupid I am, that Sunghoon only went to get my phone back to me, instead I just blew it out of proportion, feeling really guilty and sad for him. I was so embarrassed that I immediately shut up.

Sunghoon looks at me, I look at him too, but only for a second, then I look down in embarrassment. I know Heeseung isn't happy with my words, but I don't want him to win… again.

I see the ice prince cover his face with one hand as he shrugs his shoulders, offended (maybe even embarrassed?), and then puts my phone back in his pocket. Jay sighs tiredly, Jungwon laughs but is nervous.

"We can't do this. The situation is already borderline". Jay says annoyed. "You will end up to fuck again if you spend the evening together." Jaeyun comments, sitting at the table, staring at us, resting his face in the palm of his hand. "W-What difference does it make? We've already done it and then… I honestly don't think he'd want to, knowing that I've agreed to the terms of the new contract." I explain, very uncomfortably. "Yes indeed, mind your own business." Sunghoon replies. "That's a nice way to get back at you - Heeseung says then, taking me by the wrist gently this time - but now, let's talk."

He takes me to the kitchen so fast they can't stop him, then we go to the balcony, his grip tightening all the way, careful not to hurt me.

"Do you like him now? Has he told you that he's willing to do anything and usual shit for you? "I look at him annoyed, but I can't take much more. "Would you stop it? And by the way, you say that shit too". "Why do you believe him and not me?" He raises his voice and lets go of my wrist. "Heeseung, it's… it's nothing, it means nothing. Let's finish the shift, so it's all even, no… no hard feelings." "You just want to be with him." He says in a deep, scary tone. I swallow and pull away. "No, Heeseung. I want to stay away from both of you. However…" "Then just talk to him tonight. Don't sleep with him." "Will that change anything? From tomorrow I'll be at the mercy of everyone!" I raise my voice, this time looking into his eyes, but he remains cold, unyielding. "I will fight every second to prevent you from spending another minute with Sunghoon. I don't fear anyone, Amanda - he tells me with an air of conviction and threat - but of him yes. I know you can't help wanting him, I just want to limit the damage. If I have to suffer to have you, he has to suffer too.

I smile, not because I am amused, but because hi answer, his speech, really frightened me, made me insecure and nervous. He sounds serious, he sounds sincere, but there is no reason why he should be.

"If I don't have you in the end - he says again, lowering his tone further, "he won't have you either, Amanda." "You… you have to stand by him." I reply. Heeseung stares at me blankly for several seconds, then smiles pitifully. "What?" "You're friends, you have to be, do… d-do it for your music, for your dream! Don't waste your light on me… I… I'm not enough… - I say and my voice shakes, it comes out irregularly. - I just want you two to be friends, to protect each other, I… I would give anything to make things right between you. I admit as huge tears fall from my eyes.

Heeseung stands like a fool in front of my tears, unable to speak, but then sighs as if embarrassed and hugs me, avoiding looking at me directly. He is… warm. His body is very warm and comfortable, although I think his heart is very cold right now.

I didn't think it would hurt so much to know that I had failed him.

"It's not your fault, don't worry about such things."

Letting him embrace me like that, almost in public, makes me feel worried, I fear every second that Sunghoon might see us and continue with the scenes, but just like with him, I cannot refuse Heeseung. His touch, his smell, his body, I am completely helpless.

He is always so sweet, even though there are sides of him that obviously frighten me. Who is the real Heeseung? And is there really someone else?

But why does he make me feel so special?

He doesn't give up anything for me, but it's like he's fighting with the whole world.

"I'm s-serious, Heeseung. I care more about your music… than you." Despite saying this, the boy continues to hug me as he sighs tiredly. "So if we become friends, will you choose me?" "You're not listening to me!" I reply, pulling away. But he squeezes me harder, forcing me to hide my face on his broad chest. "No, I've got it all worked out. You just need to leave it to me." "I don't think you understand."

Heeseung pulls away after a few dozen seconds in which I could feel his heartbeat quickening as a pain so intense, a burning sensation that radiated from his chest throughout his body, tore through me. Now he looks at me, still cold, but now also tired. He still strokes my arm, even though we are far apart.

"Sorry about earlier…" He whispers, sounding remorseful to me. I shake my head in embarrassment. "N-never mind. Thanks for apologising." "I didn't think I was that strong."

Heeseung looks at me again, caressing my face with the back of his fingers, he looks worried but I can't tell if he really is.

"Sunghoon… Did he tell you about the video?" "What video?" The boy blinks in displeasure, but still doesn't seem friendly. "Ah, I thought so. Get it from him." "Since you know… w-why don't you tell me?" His eyes aren't tired, they look completely drained, I shiver. "Because he has to pay a price if he wants to spend this night with you. - Then he comes close to my ear and sighs. - But we can be friends, really. I will, for you."

I am speechless. I don't know what to say, but I have a bad feeling. Heeseung doesn't want to tell me, he seems happy to have given the task to the minor. A video… there's usually nothing good in videos.

In the midst of all this, my heart exploded.

"How many saw it ? What video is it, Heeseung?" He walks up to me and kisses my forehead, the gesture so warm that it shuts me up again. "I'll take care of it, don't worry. Not everyone knows, don't worry… Jungwon is young and a bit crazy, but Jay keeps him calm. I'll take care of it".

I swallow, what the hell am I supposed to say? I don't understand, my head is spinning. Really, maybe I'm at my limit, maybe Sunghoon hasn't left me any strength to hold on and cope.

I fainted, totally. I can't see anything, but I'm not going to fall, I'm sure of that.

I don't know what's happening, I don't know how much time is passing, but when I wake up, I'm in Sunghoon's room and I don't understand. I was with Heeseung before, right? The owner of the room is watching me, and when he notices that I'm awake, he approaches me and touches my forehead with the palm of his hand.

"Are you all right?" "Ah… yeah, I think I got dizzy." Sunghoon doesn't answer immediately, but sighs. "You literally fainted." I look at him in silence, suddenly remembering Heeseung's words and stiffening. "How did I get here?" "Never mind." He replies more seriously, as if he has just remembered that he was angry with me.

His back is to me as he opens the wardrobe, takes off his jumper and remains shirtless, carefully tucking the jumper into the dirty laundry basket. I can't help looking at it, man… you never get tired of looking at something perfect.

No, Amanda! Stop it!

As he takes off his trousers too, but puts them back in the cupboard, I sprint to the bed and cover my face with both hands as I see his… I've never seen him look so good, but he's got a really nice bum!

"Come on! Don't c-change in front of me!" "You're kidding, right?" He replies annoyed. "Go to hell, Park Sunghoon." I say involuntarily. He gets irritated. "What did you and Heeseung talk about?"

I don't answer immediately, I want to ask him something first. He seemed to understand, even though I didn't speak, and then I looked away.

"Why do you have such a useless room?" "Useless? - He asks me offended. - You have it wrong, the word is 'tidy', you need an overhaul." "Is it because of what you told me at the ice rink?" "Why are you suddenly so curious?" "I want to ask you things because I may never get the chance again." I explain. "What are you talking about? - He raises his voice and comes towards me after pulling on a pair of baggy trousers, the fabric of which is so thin it looks transparent, beige in colour, and which fall damn well on his long legs. - Where are you going? You said you accepted, you…" "I've accepted, but I hope I never get to this level of intimacy with anyone again." I sigh, uncertain. "Oh yeah? Then why should I answer? - He says, looking at me reluctantly as he slowly buttons his pyjama jacket, the same colour and fabric as his trousers. - You just lied all the time and you enjoyed it. That was what you wanted, wasn't it?"

Sunghoon… that really seems to be him.

"Exactly." I nod sadly.

That's not true, I didn't lie, I tried not to expose myself and him, I tried my best to restrain myself, to deny and hold back, but Sunghoon didn't notice, and that makes me sad, even though it shouldn't.

"Stop it, stop it now." He tells me seriously. I look up… he's handsome, even in his pyjamas. "What?" "You can't really… say you didn't feel anything."

I swallow, we didn't talk about it directly, he didn't ask me, but… if I stop caring about him, that's good. That's what I want, for both of us.

"How… how did you know I was… t-touched for you?"

He blanches, growing more serious but also more nervous as he tightens his lips in annoyance, his beautiful eyes narrowing on me.

"When was I going to say that?" "Think about it." I answer him.

He swallows and remains silent. Then suddenly he sits down on the bed, facing me, staring at me.

"I didn't tell you so you wouldn't… get hurt. I'll take care of it… so you don't have to worry. - He says this with a solemn air, he understands the gravity of what has happened, he doesn't even touch me because he can see from my gaze that now is not the time. - Think about it, he didn't wait a second to tell you! It won't come out, you have to believe me, you shouldn't have known". "I shouldn't have known?!" I raise my voice, stunned. "So you're just going to get sick! You're already so nervous, I didn't want to put you through this." "Sunghoon, I'm not a child you have to protect! - I remind him, and he gets even grumpier (he looks like the child now). - These things are so important, you can't think of excluding me voluntarily! I… oh my God, there's a video of me like this? And I'm alone, aren't I? So… oh fuck". I say, curling up into a ball and covering my face with my hands as I make moaning, shocked noises. "I… - He tries to put his hand on my shoulder, but suddenly, uncomfortably, decides not to. - T-Told you, you don't need to worry." "Tell me what happened….. Sunghoon…"

He sighs, obviously not wanting to talk about it. I don't know if I should understand his decisions… they are so arrogant, but basically kind. No, it's disrespectful - and yet… why do I feel he meant well?

"Jungwon has a video in wich… - he looks up embarrassed and I can't believe he has the courage to be embarrassed in such a context - you… you touch yourself, for me, clearly". "I understood that too me…" "Well, he won't publish it, he just wanted to scare us. - He sighs and lowers his face. - He knows we'll do anything to get him."

I put my hands back to my hair, how embarrassing, how pathetic, but most of all….

"Why the hell does he have cameras in the room?" "I wish I could find out too… I'm so angry that he saw a moment like that. - He comments in a very nervous but distracted tone. - You touched yourself for me, I should have the video! "I didn't touch myself for you!" I remind him, because suddenly that seems to be the important thing, not the possibility of completely and permanently destroying my reputation. "Don't lie. You're so perverted…" He laughs.

I slap his arm, slowly but quickly, I don't want to hurt him but I want him to understand that I want to do it to him. He laughs again, then stops and stares at me, realising he has been smiling too long, he suddenly becomes serious again.

"Look, I'm sorry, but Jungwon is a good guy. It's just that…" "He hurt your face." I reply, just finishing his sentence, not feeling sorry for him, looking at the wound on his mouth that I've deliberately ignored so far. He nods. "Exactly, we screwed up. But nothing will happen, tomorrow I'll make sure it's erased, but tonight is… the last night." "I don't want to d-do it anymore. I'm tired." I explain, hastily and lyingly.

Even if I wanted to, I'm still angry. The fact that he wanted to protect me isn't enough, can't be enough.

"That's not what I meant… you're really perverted." I hit him again. "Stop it." My tone is serious. "So… Heeseung told you about the video, but didn't explain anything, leaving me with the thankless job." "It would have been nice if you two didn't take it as a game." Serious comment. "I told you to trust me." "He did too.- I force a smile. - But I'm still not quiet." "Not enough? - He says. - Everything I've told you, what I've done, even though we've known each other for such a short time… isn't it enough?"

I look at him in silence, even angrier, but I can't think of anything to say at the moment. Sunghoon, seeing me so transparent, smiles softly, but I can tell he's sad too.

"I'm not clear either, I can only say I'll do my best to protect you. But you can only trust me, I have no other way to prove it." "Please… don't use this video against me. Not now, not in the future, no matter what happens. C-Can you promise?"

Caught, he's speechless. That means he's seriously thinking about it, and I don't know whether to be happy or not.

"Of course, who do you think I am? - Sigh. - You should tell Heeseung." "Stop talking about him." I reply annoyed. "Stop telling me to." He replies again before pulling me into his arms and throwing himself onto his bed.

I can't even struggle at the moment, he's stretched out tiredly. He's holding me so tightly I can't even move, but he's made himself comfortable and even rests his chin on my head, breathing exhaustedly.

"This really won't be the last time." He tells me, although he seems to be talking to himself.

What should I do? What could I say? Even now I feel sad, and I'm pretty sure it's not because of the video. I like to close my eyes in his arms, I like the smell of his skin, so fresh.

"Stop saying… such things." "Sleep and shut up." "Are you… going to sleep like that?" "I said shut up. - He says, making himself more comfortable and holding me. - I'm sleepy."

#enhypen #enha smut #enhypen smut #kpop smut #enhypen heeseung #enhypen sunghoon #sunghoon smut #heeseung smut #enha fanfic #enhypen jealousy #jealousy #jealosy #love triangle #reverse harem #smut #spicy

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thegreymoon · 11 months ago

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The Story of Minglan

Super hopeful we're now getting to the part where we finally get rid of Manniang 🙄 I am tired of her nonsense. She isn't even smart and her schemes are so vulgar and basic.

Tingye, please listen to Nanny!

***

Mmm... doubt that, but OK.

***

LOL, she seems unhappy at the prospect of doing manual labour for a living 🤣🤣

***

OH FUCK ALL THE WAY OFF 🤬🤬

This is rich, coming from a man who has never once made a decision in his life without consulting his dick first 🙄

***

LMAOOOOOOO, he couldn't sneak if his life depended on it 🤣🤣

***

Aww, Minglan, cutie, reaching out to make up with Gu Tingye 😢

***

Oh? 👀

Why not? They couldn't swing it after all?

***

I find it fascinating that all these high-born women were still expected to cook.

I can't imagine a European duchess or queen cooking anything ever unless it was a special hobby or something. When I think back on other harems in c-dramas I've seen, all the consorts/wives cooked. For example, in Nirvana in Fire we see Consort Jing being especially good at it.

Even in 2ha, Taxian-jun, who was a whole emperor at the time and had countless servants to prepare his food, insisted that Chu Wanning cook for him, even though he was terrible at it. He personally taught him to make that rice porridge and he ate it no matter what slop Chu Wannning ended up concocting. Of course, cooking and eating is Mo Ran's love language, so it made sense that he insisted on Chu Wanning doing this for him, because he desperately needed to feel loved by him, but it still seems like cooking was the norm rather than an exception among all high-level wives.

***

SHE WAS SELLING HIS MOTHER'S STUFF?

LMAO, oh, Manniang, you are so done! 🤣🤣

***

Honestly, Manniang is so embarrasing.

There she was, thinking she was fit to play on the big chessboard with the likes of Madam Qin and the rest of the nobles, but she got caught out like a rat by Nanny Chang through some elementary-level trickery. Truly pathetic.

***

How is he penniless when he has farmlands and shops in his possession?

Also, how is it even possible for some rando to sell land registered to another person without their consent?

***

Wait, who's alive?

***

How does anyone ever fall for this bullshit?

Why should he be the one to kill your treacherous ass and then carry you around on his conscience?

Fuck off and go die on your own terms, if you're so eager.

***

LMAO, classic DARVO.

Just boot her out already! I swear, men will stick their dicks into anything that comes attached to a pretty face.

She's not even a competent liar, Tingye! Please find some self-respect.

***

I mean, good, I am beyond sick and tired of her whiny, fake baby voice, but I'm worried she'll try to harm the kids.

Storywise, it makes sense, because we can't have competition for Minglan's legitimate offspring 🙄

***

With a mother like you, who needs enemies?

***

God, if she whines, "Erlaaaaaaaaang," once more in that slimy soft voice, I will break something, it grates on my nerves so badly.

I went down an ASMR rabbit hole sometime back and there were these women using this fake baby voice to narrate their shitty videos. It unnerved me so much. I can't even pinpoint the reason, it's just that all the alarm bells I have in my brain start blaring when I hear it.

***

LOL, of course she does.

#the story of minglan #tsoml spoilers #tsoml ep20

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fountainpenguin · 3 months ago

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Origin of the Pixies

Fairly OddParents ~ (August 2016 - Ongoing)

"Talk of these things should be reserved for fathers and sons. I'm Head Pixie. I'm your aldra mór, but I'm no one's daddy."

Head Pixie backstory longfic

Drama & Angst (I hear there's fluff in here somewhere...)

First-person POV

Dead Dove

Summary

After being infected with Wolbachia pipientis - the real-life bacteria that causes insects to reproduce asexually - Fergus Whimsifinado soon finds himself a single father struggling to provide for 500+ genetically-identical offspring he never really wanted in the first place. Suddenly becoming the first member of a brand new species means complex politics to deal with, a Pixie World to build, a shipping company and a therapy business to manage, and a budding interspecies war to survive... ... All on top of raising children.

Not Rated; Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings

Read on FFN | Read on AO3

Chapter Recaps | Gen 2 Pixies Sheet

Cloudlands AU - Detailed warnings & other AU info

More Fairly OddParents 'fics

This work has a largely T tone. Borderline M for themes like 'queen bee' insect people fighting to the death, getting abducted by Cupid's family for study, being forced into a will o' the wisp's harem to ensure milk for newborn Sanderson, and general themes of non-human reproduction, child loss, and war.

Head Pixie-centric longfic with a focus on:

- Growing up with freckles in insect society, where you're typecast as a violent "queen bee" who'll stop at nothing to defend his hive. Set Daddy's fortune aside for wergild; you're gonna need it. - Accidental selkie wife addition (Please don't send her back to Mom; she needs this job) - Local party boy struggles to prioritize fatherhood above raves - Getting abducted by Cupid's hot grumpy mom, who's absolutely willing to push you to your limits if it means she can unravel your biology and show you off to all her friends - Raising little worker bees... I mean, drone pixies who regularly need their faces licked for pheromone exposure or they'll cry - Cloudlands' most eligible rich bachelor rejects hugs because he fears bee-instinct cuddle death attacks; more at 11 - Building a company up from nothing. Gotta start somewhere- Why not with cupcakes? (Maybe cute kids are good for something after all...) - Raising an heir you're biologically programmed to kill... It's fine- Sis is raising the spare - Why did we think adopting a cù sìth that can steal your soul if you lie was a good idea? - The cool girl who founded the human godparenting division is afraid you'll hurt her with your big, scary muscles and she'd rather "just be friends." oh no. - WHAT midlife crisis? Hahaha... Don't read Chapter 37. - The war over godkids from "Balance of Flour" (Season 7); H.P. and his 4 eldest pixies are drafted on the Fairies' side. Huh... That's gonna cause issues with the whole "BFF with the leader of the Anti-Fairies" thing... - Divorce? Child loss?? Raising some anti-fairy kid with Anti-Cosmo? Uh-oh. - His hat is also a pen

Read on FFN | Read on AO3 | Blog Tag

"I'm impolite and I make fun of everyone! I'm immature but I will stay this way forever <3" (x)

#Fairly OddParents #FOP #Head Pixie #FOP fanfic #I'm wasp dad trash #We're Pixies!#Cloudlands AU #Cloudlands' most eligible bachelor. He can accidentally infect you so you'll die a rapid and extremely painful death :)#FAIRIES!#ridwriting #Origin of the Pixies #apparently art #ridwork guides #ridspoilers #/slams this one down after holding it for a month b/c I was committed to posting in order- “Let's freakin' GO!”#/fingerguns anyone who read this far in tags and is debating whether to read- On hiatus until Anti-Cosmo backstory 'fic catches up #but not abandoned!! Just waiting for A.C. to reach the war chapters so we can alternate POVs :)#My one regret is... I worry his wing only looks like one to those who know that's the color I use for pixie wing costas but :'D #fic announcement #dead dove #FOP Pixies #FOP Sanderson #Sanderson is neat

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inafieldofdaisies · 9 months ago

Text

15 Lines of Dialogue Tag | Tagged by @la-grosse-patate @g0dspeeed @direwombat @aceghosts @sofrosine @nightbloodbix @kyber-infinitygems @corvosattano @voidika @thesingularityseries

Deputy Sabrina Donovan | WIPs: In Hope of Tomorrow / A Trial of Errors (AU; Lines 9-15)

1. "Who the fuck ties a person to a chair on wheels. Did they rob an office?"

2. Sabrina narrowed her eyes, the corners of her mouth twitching, "Did someone try to drown you, Seed?"

3. "Yep. I'm still here, didn't teleport through the steel walls, ain't going anywhere, so you can fuck right off." She waited for his footsteps to recede, but they never did, "Like seriously, you're now gonna watch me while I sleep? Fucking creepy."

4. "It was either the radio or I start singing off-key, and I doubt you'd like that."

5. "I will have you know I've been throwing knives since I was 15,", she nodded towards the knife block at the counter, "keep talking and you would find out my actual aim."

6. "Your face is kind of hard to forget." "Was that a compliment, Deputy?" Sabrina rolled her eyes, "You wish."

7. "Are you taking us there?", she repeated, her voice taking an edge, "You have to know, I won't let you take HER."

8. "Didn't strike me as a lace type of girl, Deputy. Are you taking that one, too?", he cocked his head, eyes darkening as he examined the piece. "Oh, you know, I have to win the Miss Universe competition somehow."

9. Her hazel eyes shone as she let out a laugh, "If I had to bet, I'd say you'd be the one getting cold, Mr. Duncan, stolen clothes and all that. I feel like I can skip on asking to see what you're wearing." "Ouch.", he rubbed at his chest at the jab, "That one hurt." "Too soon?"

10. "And you're alone?" "No. A whole harem of guys is keeping me company, actually. They're currently fighting who will be sleeping on my tiny bed, and who's taking the ground, pillowless. A true form of punishment, I tell you."

11. "I'm dealing with a… situation." Her expression was unreadable, "I can see that." "Roughly estimated, how much did my chances sunk with?", [John] asked, flipping back to the view of his face. "Who says they did?"

12. "There's a bat.", he whispered like the creature would hear him and put an end to his game of hiding. "A rat?", she echoed incorrectly. "Sure, Detective,", he hated how his voice shook even as he spoke quietly, "but the type with fucking wings."

13. "Soo..", she began slowly, "why are you without pants? Don't tell me they got stolen while you slept… was it the bat? Should I call Stockton? Though, I think crimes committed by animals are out of his jurisdiction, you can probably vouch for that."

14. "What were you doing up so late?" "A girl has to have some secrets, John."

15. "You could always march over there and threaten to sue them for harassment… Your poor ears would thank you." "Don't tempt me. Because we might end up with a different situation on our hands." She raised an eyebrow, "Them asking you to join?", all he could do was blink as she laughed quietly, "Kidding. Oliver isn't rubbing off on me, I promise."

Deputy Calahan Hartley | WIP: In Hope of Tomorrow

1."I WILL GIVE YOU PURGE, YOU FUCKERS! What timing to be out of dynamite."

2. ["You ready to work?"] "As ready as I can be after crash-landing, almost drowning and getting shot at. Just another Monday, really."

3. "I'm not a leader, chief, hell, it's a miracle I'm still a Deputy. Fuck. Am I even one anymore?"

4. "Zorro will be on his best behavior, I promise. You won't even notice he's around. Plus… he gives mean foot rubs." "Rookie.", disbelief seeped into [Mary May's] tone. "Fine. The foot rubs were a lie. Though, I can take up on that task." "You ain't coming anywhere near my feet, Rookie."

5. "I couldn't leave him behind, gorgeous. He's my son." A huff escaped her, probably at the pout he followed his words with, "He's a raccoon."

6. "One day, you're gonna realize what you're missing, gorgeous. And I won't be looking for payback for these insults. Too much."

7. "Your plan.", Leslie corrected him, "That you devised after getting drunk yesterday." "Most of my plans are conconted that way, chief."

8. "Oh, Leslie, bold and brave, agree to march over to Johnny's GATEEEE…", Hartley sang over the usual lyrics, meeting Zorro's dark gaze, "He looks like John, right, my boy? Even the universe agrees, Parish."

9. "Good old Joseph, oh, how he'd lose his mind if he learns 'God' has been showing visions of his brother fornicating to someone else, he'd probably die from the shock before I have the chance to kill him."

10. "I'm having the worst time of my life here. Humor is what keeps me going, besides Mary May's hidden stash… and well, my anger."

11. "You have the hots for [John], and me… I want to turn him into a human creme bruleee. Two types of people, Gray."

12. "[John]'s been calling me daily, I'm leaving him some friendly notes in return. The start of a beautiful friendship."

13. "Hope you don't mind sitting in the back. Zorro loves riding shotgun."

14. "Go meet your God, tell Him I will send Joseph soon, too."

15. "You're in a bar in Montana.", Mary May rolled her eyes and set a new empty glass in front of [Sébastien], "Closest you'd get to me making you tea, even at lunch is serving you lukewarm water with some of my spit in it. Organic. So count yourself lucky." Calahan leaned in, whispering loudly, "Also known as blatant disrespect. Which I would advise against. Though, I'd take her spitting in my drink anyday."

Tagging, @socially-awkward-skeleton @strangefable @strafethesesinners @purplehairsecretlair @finding-comfort-in-rain @dumbassdep @josephslittledeputy @marivenah @josephseedismyfather @trench-rot @simonxriley @wrathfulrook @shellibisshe @gearvmac @amalkavian @cassietrn @carlosoliveiraa @simplegenius042 @onehornedbeast @theelderhazelnut @katsigian and anyone that would like to do the tag <3

#so many gems in one <3 #and ofc more gifs to set the atmosphere <3 #tagged <3 #oc: sabrina donovan #oc: calahan hartley #john x sabrina #wip: in hope of tomorrow #wip: a trial of errors #tag games #15 lines of dialogue tag #ocs #fc5 deputy #fc5 ocs #far cry 5 deputy #far cry 5 oc #mygifs #wip snippet #character reference #character dialogue

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11queensupreme11 · 6 months ago

Note

Everybody fucking minds and always doing it the no sexy way 😞😔

Do love no war babygirls

If we're very decided we can solve all of this in bed! The sexy way

Or play UNO and whoever wins is the top

Sincerely, after watching the dress... Totally would think they're doing some kinky shit 🤣

Beelzebub: we can hold hands if you want 🥺 totally platonic no second intentions here

Percy: *didn't hear anything, cared no shit for what's happening, wants a hot dog with meat that probably is from a rat* what did you say?

Percy watching Sally being happier without her, her friends being happy with some girl... Queen, totally trauma, I'd cry and beg my mom to hold me even if that makes us miserable

Beelzebub, your yandere tendencies are showing. Giving her traumas and comforting her after. Get a man that can do both (please don't get you a man that can do that)

(Give us moooooore I'm starving)

(Waiting for what you're going to do with that, Percy progress- maybe fall is the correct word- is showing queen. Love it)

Anyway, can someone please draw them on their date? 😭 That's so cute, they're literally so perfect together, like that couple that is the black cat boyfriend with his golden retriever girlfriend and they're precious 💞

(Beelzebub worrying about her suicidal thoughts and he admitting he doesn't want to die so much... *Cheff kiss* we love an emo boy that is self aware)

Now, Loki?

Loki, my boy, your panic is beautiful to watch, horrific to endure.

I'm wondering how they are going to deal with being in the same harem? Fight to be the favorite concubine? Seduce their way to Percy's bed?

Percy: you're just a pathetic simp pretending to be an alpha man and you just go destroy mode whenever you're confronted with your own emotions. You love me so much that is making you look pathetic

Loki:

Him switching sides in the moment he accepts he loves her is gold.

He may be crazy, sadistic and a psychopath, but by the gods he's not going to fool himself.

He loves the girl, now he needs to kill all the other people that love the same girl.

Assassination! His favorite hobby! She's so much fun and they haven't even had sex yet! Wonderful wife indeed

And starting with Beelzebub is a wise move, you know? From all of them he's the one that she's the most comfortable with, he could play the slow game he's the one she'd fall at the end (you know, once she forgets about the other world, that he could make happen too).

Right now Beelzebub is that best friend that is the one for her (the other, even if I love them, aren't so close to her). He just needs to wait, fool her and she'd be his

(as if the other are going to let that happen, but is the scent, you know?)

Loki is right to be jealous of him, no one (with a dick) is close to her like him, she's herself with him and is the only one that likes him with his depressive tendencies.

He could say: Percy, for medical reasons, undress yourself and let me study your body. It may end in sexy medical porn, depending on my self control

And she wouldn't see no wrong.

Is Beelzebub! Her bestie! She can trust him with her security (poor navy girl, you can't never trust a man that much). Even if he has feelings for her she wouldn't worry about him doing anything to her, just worry about the uncomfortable situation.

Wondering if they're going to guilty trappe her to stay (You made us love you! We are learning to be open and to accept love and you want to leave us? Leave us in a world where we're fated to yearn for you for eternity and be alone again?), Percy would suffer whatever if she thinks she's saving people, such a naive and dumb girl, too good to this world.

This whole situation is pure chaos, they're planning so many things just to crash with each other. Would be funny to see them working together but also don't know how that situation would happen.

Anyway, thanks for the amazing chapter Queen! 👑

im sorry but this part cracked me up 😭

"for medical reasons we may need to fuck 😔"

"yeah sure ok"

😭😭😭

IM SO GLAD YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER!!

i had a blast writing this chapter lmao, and im currently writing another chapter (not the next one) that's gonna be even better

maybe... idk. all i can say is that beel digs an even deeper grave in this one chapter and i just love watching him lose his shit

#👸🏻| asks #👸🏻| arsenic blues

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ivelle-serenity · 5 months ago

Text

Skateboard 13

Wind breaker

author's note: thank you all for waiting!

✧˖° — windbreaker men

✧˖° — mdni, smut, description of not safe for work content.

✧˖° — this is a story not one shot.

I knew right away that something had happened earlier while Mia and I were away. From Dom's behavior and the way they looked at us when we arrived, they seemed uneasy. I didn't let on that I noticed their actions. I sighed and ran my fingers through my fake blonde hair. Why do I have the feeling that Gramps told them something about me? Frustration was written all over my face as I walked out of the school with Mia. We immediately saw the boys waiting for us outside by the car.

"I just realized that blonde suits you, Demitra. You look different!" Dom said, watching me as I walked. I glanced at Jay, who was now avoiding looking at me. Relief washed over me; he better keep avoiding me because I literally don't trust myself around him. I can't even control my actions when I'm near him.

"Yeah, but I think I still need to wear a mask. Shelly and I don't have the same features, obviously," I said with a laugh, which Dom awkwardly echoed as he scratched the back of his neck. I looked over at Minu when he held out a hair tie. I furrowed my brows.

"Shelly ties her hair when she rides."

Oh! Of course. How could I forget that?

"Oh, noted. I thought she just liked to show off her beautiful blonde hair to the audience," I joked as I tied my hair. The three guys remained silent, which annoyed me. They know something, I just know it.

"And also, she always wears these gloves. They're her favorite," Mia said excitedly, handing me a pair of black and blue gloves. I almost scoffed. Do I really have to completely imitate her?

"You know, if Shelly were here, she would have liked you as a friend." I felt as if a bucket of cold water had been dumped on me at Mia's words. I froze, staring at her before quickly looking away. I almost tore the gloves I was holding.

"Uh, Mia? Come on, let's head to the car," Minu interjected, though I could hear the panic in his voice and didn't understand why. Confusion was evident on his girlfriend's face, but she went along with him. They had their own car, and I guess I was riding with Jay in Dom's car.

"We should go. We can't be late, guys," June said with a smile as he opened the door for me. I smiled at June. When I noticed that Jay was also getting in the back seat, I immediately moved away.

"I'll sit in the front," I said, opening the door to the passenger seat. Dom's driver looked surprised.

"kid, that's my master's seat—"

"hey, it's alright," Dom said to his driver. "Are you sure you want to sit there? You could sit in the back; it's safer there—"

I cut Dom off when my eyes met Jay's. I laughed and shook my head. "I'm fine here, Dom. Don't worry."

When the car started, I heard June clear his throat. I looked at him through the rearview mirror. I saw Dom and June exchanging signals, seemingly deciding who would speak up. Meanwhile, Jay had his eyes closed, head tilted back, resting against the seat.

"Demitra..." I glanced at June. "Uhh-we've decided that we need to keep you out of sight from the audience, since what we're doing clearly breaks the competition rules," June said cautiously. "We just don’t want you to get into trouble," he added, his concern unmistakable. I felt a comforting warmth in my chest and hoped that his concern was sincere. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions about how much they cared for me, just because they wanted to protect me.

"We know you're really talented, and we can't deny that. Like, come on, you could probably win this right away," Dom said. "But I think it would be better if you stayed behind June, you know..." He couldn't finish his sentence.

"You mean to be just a display, I got it." I chuckled. "And besides, I don’t really plan on taking this too seriously because, as you said, your team is relying on me. One mistake, and I could jeopardize the Hummingbird," I said with a nod. June sighed with relief while Dom watched my face, trying to read my reaction. I avoided his eyes.

"And after this, you won't need me anymore, right? Hopefully, in the next round, they won't require a full team."

"Yeah, we hope so. We don't want to take advantage of your kindness. This is more than enough," June said, and I didn't respond. I could feel my chest tightening. After all of this, I would be out of their circle. Why does it hurt? I don't even talk to them that much. Maybe I'm just used to their presence, their friendship, the laughs, the jokes, everything. I bit my lower lip as I remembered seeing Nick earlier.

There's no way I would stay at that school. I came to Korea specifically to distance myself from anything related to her, so why would I willingly remain in a place that constantly reminds me of that part of my past? Being here was supposed to be a fresh start, a way to escape the shadows of my history.

My mind was a mess. I had no idea what to do after this race. Should I transfer to another school? But where would I go? Or should I leave Korea, knowing that Shelly might come back? Yet, I can’t just pack up and leave with my debt to Wooin still unpaid. It’s not as simple as walking away—I have responsibilities here that I can't ignore

I didn’t realize we had arrived at the League of Street Racing venue until Dom opened the door for me. I thanked him as I stepped out. It was odd that Yuna wasn’t with us—perhaps she had classes to attend. As soon as I exited the car, I was met by a sea of people. I bowed my head and adjusted my face mask, staying close behind Dom and June, who seemed to understand that I preferred to be shielded by them.

I noticed that Jay was standing beside me, so I subtly moved away while looking at the other crews. I couldn't see the Sabbath team, which was a huge relief. I knew Wooin would be furious if he saw me here.

"Stop it." Jay suddenly spoke next to me, startling me. He had been so quiet earlier. What's up with him now? Wait, was he talking to me? "You’re supposed to stick close to me." His cold voice sent a shiver up my spine. My ears grew warm, and I looked away.

"So she's clingy, huh?" I teased.

He glared at me, but his eyes weren’t angry. It was just...there was no emotion. As usual. "Don’t avoid me. It’s too obvious." He turned his gaze away from me. I almost let out a sigh. I had no choice but to move closer to him. Our arms touched. I looked up at him, checking if what I did was okay, but he had no reaction, as if he expected me to do it.

"Why did the crowd suddenly get bigger?" Dom asked irritably, running a hand through his hair.

"GO HUMMINGBIRD! WE LOVE YOU!" Girls were cheering, obviously for Jay, not the whole crew. How did I know? They were literally looking at Jay with stars in their eyes. Damn, this boy is popular.

"I know. That's why we need to be careful," June whispered to us. I just nodded.

"Isn't it just me, or has Shelly shrunk?" I winced at the comment.

"Ha," I scoffed. "They even memorize your team's height. Can you believe it?" I murmured to Jay. I didn’t expect him to respond because I knew he wouldn’t.

The MC took to the stage, and the crowd erupted with excitement. I glanced at the big screen, which was showing us and the other crews. The Monsters were here, and I’d heard they were quite skilled. If I weren’t here to replace Shelly, I’d love to compete against them. They seemed interesting.

"ARE YOU ALL EXCITED FOR THIS NEW ROUND?" the MC shouted, prompting the crowd to yell even louder. "I know, I know. It's been so long, and I know you’ve all been waiting for this to happen again. And let me tell you, this round is not just any round. It will make your jaw drop!"

Everyone screamed in excitement. I straightened up, my eyes narrowing as I noticed a box in the middle of the stage. It seemed the MC was about to draw a name. My mind immediately started hoping that Hummingbird wouldn’t be chosen, even though I didn’t know what it was for yet.

"As you can see, there's a box here. I'm going to draw to see which team will face the most challenging and dangerous test where they won’t have an opponent! YES! YOU HEARD ME RIGHT! They won’t be racing against anyone else; they just need to complete the bloodiest race of all!"

My heart stopped at the announcement. My eyes widened as the screen showed the narrowest path I’d ever seen in my life. Not only that, but there were massive vehicles there, and there was a bowl where the bike had to ride along the wall to get out. You can only see it in a skatepark. This is...weird. Out of all the videos I’ve watched about the League of Street Racing, none of the rounds were like this.

I glanced to the side of the stage and saw a man in a black hoodie and facemask. When he noticed I was looking at him, he turned away. I poked the inside of my cheek with my tongue in frustration. I smelled something fishy here.

“We're so dead,” Dom muttered under his breath.

"The mechanics for this race are simple: you must reach the finish line within the given time, which is only 3 minutes! Every member of your team needs to make it to the finish line, and if even one is left behind, your team will be immediately disqualified. The crew will not be able to continue to the next round," the MC said with a grin, swirling his hand inside the box filled with papers.

"Are they crazy? Why would they do something like this?!" I hissed, frustration etched across my face. June looked troubled, while Dom seemed deep in thought. I glanced at Jay, who was now watching the MC prepare to draw the first team to race.

"You're the only one with experience for this," Dom said, drawing everyone's attention. "I know it sounds like we're asking a lot, but you're our only chance to get everyone across the finish line—"

"Dom—" Jay tried to interrupt, but Dom spoke again.

"Jay, can't you see that? That's a race of death. Demitra is our only chance, so stop complicating things. Come on, man," he snapped at his friend. I was taken aback by his urgency and raised my hand to stop them from arguing.

"Hey, what's going on here? Just chill. We're at a race," I interjected. "I may have experience, but that's not the only key to reaching the finish line." I sighed and looked at the big screen. "All we need is to help each other. Dom, you're our sprinter. Do you remember what I taught you last time about the positions to control your speed better?" I asked, and he nodded.

"The top tube safe is a position you can use to get out of the bowl section quickly. I know you're scared of the curve, but believe me, once you do this, you'll be on the surface in no time," I explained. I got on the bike to demonstrate the position to June. "This position can increase your speed by 17%. It may look scary, but it's safer on a bike than on a skateboard."

"Noted. All I need to do is get into that position and close my eyes, right?" I sensed the fear in his voice.

I shook my head in amusement. "I mean, you can try, but I don't think you can close your eyes. It would only make your fear worse."

I turned to June. "Don't worry about me, Demitra. I was listening while you were teaching Dom. I've got it."

I sighed in relief. I was startled when Jay approached me and tightened my helmet on my head. "You may excel at this, but you still need to be careful. This isn't a skatepark," My heart raced faster.

"I don't need to teach you, right?" I whispered with a teasing tone. He held my gaze.

"All I need is to finish this race and for you to be careful. We don't want you to get hurt." We? Or him? It's like he's using his friends as an excuse. Oh, come on! I can't believe I'm thinking this way. What is he doing to me?

"I'm more capable than you think." I wanted to tell him that I've experienced more dangerous races than this one, but he doesn't need to know that.

"I know." I froze and stared at him. His words seemed to carry deeper meaning, as if he was hinting at something.

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tarotwithavi · 2 years ago

Text

Advice and messages from a friend

WHAT IS COMING FOR YOU? WHAT DO YOU NEED TO HEAR RIGHT NOW?

1 ~ 2 ~ 3

✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Disclaimer : pictures do not belong to me they belong to their respective owners.

Masterlist paid services customise your own reading

✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Pile 1

You know you have to let go of your victim mentality if you have to attract positive things in life. Start focusing on what you can have instead of focusing on what you couldn't have. Be stronger. Both mentally and physically. When you will start focusing on yourself you'll see instant results. You'll bloom. I know your disappointed by the people around you but remember you should never expect anything from anyone. It'll only hurt you in the end. You have no control over others actions but you have control over yours. So work for yourself. Buy yourself the things you want. Get out of your comfort zone. Let life make you happy. Look at the sky and moving clouds. Sing your favourite songs.

I know you're at that point of life where you can't understand yourself. You have doubt about yourself. Spirit is saying that you should let go of your past self in order to make space for the new person you're about become. Some people may not recognize you. Remember this is all for the best of you.

Channeled messages

Buy roses for yourself.

Write a letter to your future self and your past self.

You're manifestations are about to come.

August is going to be an important month.

You're about to become a whole new person.

A whole new chapter begins.

Things I heard : Lalita/lolita, karen, Raven, Holly, Britney, lola? , surpise, shitty storm, goody two shoes, 8 , 5th April , Rover , Harem? , eek, power, Virgo sun/moon/rising, purple balloon.

Masterlist

✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Pile 2

Oh boy, why do you let people walk all over you? Can't you see how much it's hurting you? I know you have abandonment issues but you can't just sit around and let yourself be tossed around like a sack of potatoes ( don't know where that came from but anyways) you see even old leaves need to be cut from a plant to make space for new ones. If you won't leave toxic people the how would you find your soul family? You need to make space for the right. The people who make you feel guilty for being yourself aren't the true ones. You need to take only one step and that is to leave that toxic situation. And also your boy ain't being true to you. Be it just a friend or even boyfriend.

You know when people find flaws in you they are just projecting their insecurities on you. So you're not at fault, they are just insecure. Be your unapologetically authentic self my darling. Start the things you left behind because of those people. You're doing amazing sweetheart.

Channeled messages

Cut that bitch out of your life.

To the salon we go.

Pink is your color mam, wear it often.

Oh cook your eggs properly.

Perform a chord cutting ritual.

You need to be true to yourself

you're about to become a butterfly 🦋

Things I heard : all the sick and twisted night that I have been waiting for ya, they were worth it all along. Leo sun/moon/rising. Sunshine after the rain, swordsmanship, 16th century fashion, boba shop, number 3 , escapism.

Masterlist

✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Pile 3

First off straighten yout back. February has been a bitch to you hasn't it? I can see that you're very drained and even now you're at the verge of dosing off. Ahh I don't know how many times you need to hear this but GET 8 HOURS OF SLEEP YOU AIRHEAD! You need a proper rest for your body and mind. How can you expect to be happy and energetic when you're sleeping at 2-3 Am? And why are you crying over spilt milk? Go buy another bottle of it. Do you think crying is going to solve all your problems , You crybaby. I know your the eldest and have a lot of responsibilities but that doesn't mean you should ignore your health. Sometimes I just wanna smack some senses into that empty head of yours.

Look I know you are going through a tough time right now but please please I'm begging you please take care of your health. I mean you might not get it now but just wait till you get old. You knees will always ache, you're back will kill you, you hair and teeth will fall off. Only then you'll remember my advice you rice sack gurjhfhdjrbf.

Channeled messages

Winnie the pooh didn't rock crop tops all our childhood only to see you be insecure in your body.

This girl is on fire

A male is going to come to you. He will offer love for some and friend for some.

Take care of your hands. You might get hurt there if you don't.

What's a red flag? What's a green flag? I only believe in rainbow flag 🏳‍🌈

You gotta do what you gotta do.

Things I heard : a thought? , hula hoop, ballet teacher, face mask, give your eyes some rest, sohit? Rohit? Idk, harry, Adam, Aiden, mark your territory bitch, prayer, pearl, letters , wax, thrones and flams, black rose/robe.

Masterlist

✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ *✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

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machinesonix · 9 months ago

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Gang, I love the Harkonnens. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t endorse the Harknonnens, but there is something really refreshing about unsanitized villains. They aren’t inhuman slaves to Morgoth, they aren’t seeking restitution for some sort of childhood trauma with dalmatians, they are just shitty, weird people and we get to talk about how those people think without trying to excuse it. What really made me fall in love is the sheer alien weirdness of Geidi Prime in the 1984 movie, and if you haven’t seen that I really recommend you check that out. I feel like there should be some sort of trigger warning, but I don’t really know how I’d tag it so use your best discretion. Today I want to zoom in on a Harkonnen scene towards the end of the first book that I personally would like to see in some sort of extended cut. Let’s dig in.

I’m gonna start off by reminding everyone about the most famous scene in the franchise right at the beginning. You know it. The pain box. ‘I hold at your neck the gom jabbar, it’s poison kills only animals.’ Mohaim is testing Paul’s ability to delay gratification by threatening to stab him with a poison needle if he pulls out of the pain box. We've all seen the memes. Now let's talk about Feyd.

In the book, the whole un-drugged gladiator thing was Feyd's own doing. See, Feyd's family doesn't take him very seriously. He's been chosen as the na-Baron because he's got charisma and he'll look like the savior of Arakkis after Rabban and Vladimir, but he’s a big showboater that has all his fights rigged. By conspiring with Thufir to get a real Atredies soldier into the arena with him, he is forcing his family to realize how important he is to them. If something happens to him, everything goes up in smoke. But he's also given a chance to demonstrate that he is competent (even if he's cheating with a poisoned blade and some selective brainwashing of the undrugged slave.) The seduction with Lady Fenrig happens off screen, but I think in both Herbert and Villinueve's telling of the story, both of these show us this conflict Feyd has with the pressures of his family whether they're tests from the Baron or something he does to himself in response to those pressures. Finally, and most importantly to Feyd, when the Baron executes his slavemaster for slipping up with the gladiators, the next slavemaster is on Feyd's payroll.

Years down the line the Baron finds a poison needle hidden on one of his slave boys and immediately knows what's up. Feyd is trying to claim the Baron's seat and he's been planning on it ever since He calls Feyd in to make him watch as his entire staff and harem is executed on a whim. Here's where we get the absolute juicy thematic inversion. This shit makes me salivate in a way I might want to talk with a therapist about. The Baron says ‘Feyd, you know what this whole poison needle business tells me? You don't know where your priorities are. I am working on setting up the Harkonnens for generations to come and you're so laser focused on the inheritance you haven’t put any thought into what comes next. So stop trying to kill me and let's talk about your future.’

Feyd-Rautha is, by Bene Gesserit standards, an animal. In the Villinueve film we kinda skirt around the idea by hearing he's such a weirdo that the nerve induction gets him off, but I think this scene here really helps to illustrate why Paul might be the Kwizatz Haderach and Feyd has no shot. They've both got the genetics and the ability to win over a crowd. Nobody saw it coming, but the Kwizatz Haderach's ultimate purpose is to wage the war that will literally end all wars, you'd think Feyd-Murder-For-Fun-Rautha would be a shoe-in to traumatize humanity to violence once and for all. But the fact he'd be good at it is what makes him ineligible. The Kwizatz Haderach can't be someone who thinks in the short term. If Paul didn't have the big picture in mind, he would have fled from the violent future he saw himself being responsible for. If Feyd were in his shoes, there is no way he could stop from getting lost in the sauce. Feyd orchestrated his own gom jabbar in the attempt on his uncle's life, and he failed. Even if he saw the same path to save humanity, he'd have too many opportunities to indulge his glory seeking.

#dune #dune meta #baron harkonnen #feyd rautha #house harkonnen

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sadceline · 5 months ago

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THE ENHYPEN HOST || 4

|| Reverse harem || ft. TXT, Mingyu (Seventeen) & BTS

PREVIOUS CHAPTER:

FIRST CHAPTER:

When I returned to the room (and it is still strange to me) I found Jay sleeping blissfully. I didn't wake him up, but watching his absorbed expression I had my doubts he would have noticed me anyway if I had tried.

I didn't manage to get to sleep until six o'clock I think, when I heard him get up and make some noise, especially after he left the room, and I heard the others as well. Of course I could never sleep, despite I was so tired, I didn't even think about the fact that they will see me with my face caked with sleep, the repulsive me, from now on.

However, when I no longer hear them, I fall asleep in a second.

I wake up at 12 regenerated, the house is empty and silent. As I get myself settled, I call out to Ester.

"Oh god, oh god, who did you fuck?" She shouts.

I burst out laughing; it's the first thing she says to me. "Jay."

She screams even louder, I have to plug the phone speakers. "Bitch, him?!"

"Yes…. and is gigantic. Mastodontic."

She doesn't stop screaming, I wonder if she is in public or at home, considering she works in a korean advertising office. "Please, you have to invite me."

"Of course, I just have to find the right time. For now I think everyone hates me, those who don't hate me are scared or disgusted."

"Those who despise buy."

"You think so?" I giggle nervously.

"What envy… Jay, you damn bitch."

That's right, I hadn't thought of that. Since she's so crazy about Bangtan and hopelessly, sincerely, madly in love with Jongkook, I didn't calculate that she has bias in Enhypen anyway, and between the two is Jay. She shares a preference with a more obvious Jake, but she likes them both very much.

"What are they like?"

"I I don't know, they seem arrogant, more or less."

"Even Jay?"

"He … he's peculiar, I guess."

"In what way?!" He shouts again.

"I can't describe them to you yet…" I stall, undecided sincerely about what to say.

"Arrogant, huh? I didn't imagine anything different, but… like how did they take it? What did they say to you?"

"They were kind, more or less, except for Sunghoon. Oh, and I think Heeseung. I don't really understand him. Anyway, they could all be facades, I have that impression."

"You have to investigate."

"I must, you're right."

We laugh in unison, but in the meantime I think I should start with the cleaning today. I'll do four rooms, as planned, anyway I haven't even received warnings about what to touch or not to touch, but at least the bed I can do.

"So… exactly what do you do?"

"I guess scullery maid, however, the pay is worth the candle."

We laugh again.

Ester, however, has the 1 p.m. shift and still has to settle in, so we hang up with a promise to catch up soon. She tells me to contact her if anything happens, and it's like a warm breath her thoughtfulness makes me feel much less alone.

I'll start at Jay's, so I can get my things in better order as well, but mostly because I don't know whose other rooms are whose, I'll have to go blind, I wasn't sober enough to observe who was coming back where, yesterday.

Not that it changes anything, since I have to do them all, however having used the first round for acquaintances, three of them will be behind for the first five days, so maybe I should do them all.

It would make sense, I could gain some confidence, although I shouldn't yearn for anything like that.

Whatever, let's get on with it. I tie up my hair, put on a low-cut top, baggy shorts and socks to slide better on the hardwood floor, I have to be comfortable, the summer period has just begun and although it's not really hot, yet, the house is so hot.

Jongseong's room is strange, I can't say it's tidy but his closet is a hell swarming with expensive stuff. There is a kind of chaotic orderliness to it all, except for the closet, which was more harmonious before I made room, though.

I didn't bring a lot of things, so I manage to make good use of the generous space he offered to me. Now, the room looks a lot cooler, I moved the curtains and a lot of light comes in.

Let's go with the next one, let's see, I'll pick at random.

Hmm, it's a…normal room. There doesn't seem to be anything to do, everything is already in order. I don't indulge my curiosity in wanting to find out who it belongs to, partly because I also tried not to go through Jay's things, that would be inconsistent.

It is strange, though, why is it so anonymous? It is said that the environment where one lives reflects the soul, but the soul in question is not just neat, it is just ordinary, just looking around I can see that there is the bare minimum, not a photo, not a memento. Jay has several fan gifts, in the room, and he also has photos of his family, there is nothing here.

I go outside, that's okay, I won't go any further. I don't care, anyway. Seriously. I really mean it.

The room next door I recognize instead, and it's quite nice. Nicely furnished, even tidy all things considered, to the point where I just give it a quick tidy up to finish.

Around me are a few, not too many, but several Lego models. As I get closer to look at them I realize that these are some very rare pieces, not because I understand any of them, I knew someone who liked them very much, he showed them to me, something remained.

His order is pleasant, because is real. His various gadgets are arranged randomly, but there is something extremely elegant about the composition.

When I'm done with the third one which is Jake's room as I suspected but mostly because he has several, many photos of himself (not alone, but the ones in which he looked very good), one more to go, I realize it's already 3 p.m. (I took my time), maybe they won't be back for lunch? I don't even have their numbers yet, I guess, because I'm not sure I'll ever get them anyway.

Whatever, since I'm almost done, why not give myself a break? I'll untie my hair, turn on the TV, listen to some music - not theirs…right? Yes, that would be pathetic, so I'll put on someone I like musically almost as much as I do: TXT.

How cool, I find out they have all the subscriptions they can get, must be great to be rich, huh? Curious that I think that because of the amount of streaming services accessible and not because of the huge penthouse I'm in.

All right, the music is there, I've had the juice, I'll re-bind my hair. I'll also do the cooking, I'm feeling generous, since it's all new and strange I'll try to show myself useful so they won't break my balls!

No, maybe I'm not in the right position? I don't get it, what a mess. Whatever, let's dance and not think about it.

I go into the fourth room, oh, this one is nicer, but it's actually messy. There's a keyboard, I have an idea who the owner might be, should I set it on fire? No, we're not really enemies yet, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt.

One of my favorite songs, Fawerell Neverland, has started, I can't help but sing it with them. Meanwhile I pick up some empty ramen packs, some clothes left haphazardly on the floor, some cans, until I notice something I should have expected?

There are boxers. If they are at the foot of the bed, it means they are used. Honestly, Jay didn't leave anything like that lying around, what manners are they when you already know I'm probably going to come over and clean up at your place?

So, what do I do? Do I pick them up or do I leave them in protest? And why am I curious? But then curious about what? All right, I leave them where they are and resume singing.

Heeseung, are you my second enemy? At least you should have the decency to declare it.

"NEVERLAND MY LOVE!" I shout at the top of my lungs, noticing soon after that the bedside drawer is slightly open and I can make out a girl's face, in a picture.

"Do you listen to other people's songs? Weren't you an engene?"

I swear, I jump in the air. I completely failed to notice that he was standing in the doorway, at this point who knows how long.

Who is that girl? It shouldn't concern me, much less interest me.

"Can't I listen to anyone else?" I answer, trying to maintain a calm tone of voice, but I literally defecated on myself.

"Of course not."

"Of course you're strange - I sigh - and anyway, don't leave your dirty underwear lying around. At least you take that off."

"I was hoping you'd steal it from me. It would be in theme with your character, wouldn't it?"

"You're disgusting in person." I say that, though, why don't I think it? He almost snatched a laugh from me, lucky I remembered in time that I have dignity.

I continue to make his stupid bed, so I will have finished my ordinary duties anyway. Does that mean everyone is back? Why do I feel like seeing Jay? It's Heeseung's fault, it's like he's the cheerful version of Sunghoon, isn't it?

He's a jerk but he does it in a nice way? Cute? Charming? Laughing like that? Damn.

I see him turn to the other side of his twin bed, looking at me but I just can't hold eye contact. I lower my eyes and see he's clutching the other end of the sheet, helping me make the bed, I guess he wants me to leave his room.

"I'm not disgusting, am I? You don't mean that." He chuckles, adjusting the pillows for me.

"Yes I do, the biggest disappointment."

He looks at me again, why did he become serious for a second? Did I imagine that? "Disappointment? Is that a hint?"

I blush, a lot, feeling my cheeks flaming. "A hint about what? When I talk to you, I feel like I'm talking to a mentally ill."

"How is your korean so good?" Change the subject again, is that a peculiarity or something?

"I had a very good teacher."

"Oh yeah? And was this person born in Korea?"

"No, she is italian like me."

"Interesting."

I'm curious. We talk a lot fast, it's a constant back-and-forth, we sound like two old friends bickering, but something is different, it's clear. Even though I can talk to him, I feel discombobulated like I'm inside a shaker in action.

"Ah, you were here." I feel like I'm being called by someone.

Turning around, in the doorway of Heeseung's room, this time it's Jake. Was he looking for me? "Me?"

"Yes, you have to be with me today, right?"

in the romance untold album i found this card and the one from heeseung…. i'm so glad

Ah, so that's how it works? I laugh.

He's so handsome, my eye retinas burned during that measly second when I dared to lift my eyelids to him - mine, it was a nervous laugh.

"And how would you prefer me to welcome you? In the traditional korean way? Or something more affectionate?" I drawl, dying inside, my eyes wandering lost across the floor.

"Why not both while wearing a maid's dress?"

"Is that a good idea, I order it?" Heeseung asks.

"Think for yourself about how you want to be greeted, that's my idea."

"What if I had exactly the same idea?"

"Simple, you would be the second."

Heeseung utters a dramatic verse, touching his heart and fingers tighten on his…chest…his chest wrapped in the white t-shirt he wears, which is not exactly loose.

I cough, I think they have forgotten my presence. "I'm not a cosplayer. Apply to the agency next time."

Then the ace of the band, so called not only by the fans, and not for trivial reasons but on the contrary for his undeserved enormous talent in practically anything he does, singing, dancing, being stupidly handsome, bursts out laughing.

He's… I just don't know how to describe it. If there's anything I really have a soft spot for it's his laughter, his smile, of any kind, and seeing him up close, taking advantage of the moments when I'm sure he's looking away to watch, offers me an indescribable feeling.

"Good thing she's nice." He says, turning to Jake.

He is confused, I can see it, sense it. He looks at us tenderly, I feel like biting his face off, I quickly look away terrified by my intrusive thoughts, if I look at him, I really want to.

Then he walks over, grabs my wrist and smiles. "Let's go now."

"Where are we going?"

"I have a lot of things to ask you." He explains, pulling me gently.

Him? He is the one who should ask me?

Forgive me Ester, you've always had excellent taste. I can't deny it.

I follow him, asking no questions. As I pass through the hallway I realize that everyone, or almost everyone, has returned, certainly Jay, Jungwon and Niki. The first looks at me, while Jake drags me by the wrist, says nothing, and I get a strange feeling.

It's strange, isn't it? He didn't even say hello to me.

No, maybe I should be the one to do that? And isn't it that I might annoy Jake? He referred to spending time together as something exclusive, so should I pretend that others don't exist? There is something paradoxical about this situation.

"Did you find disorder? I'm sorry." He says, looking around and turning his warm, sensual smile on me. I'm afraid he's playing it off with Heeseung at this point that I see him live.

He's not really embarrassed, but he wants to look embarrassed.

"No, your room is the best so far." I reply under my breath.

"Which ones have you done so far? There's one neater than mine."

"Ah, so I found it! Whose is it?"

"Sunghoon's."

Ah.

Jaeyun, his korean name, sits on the bed, looks at me and smiles like a fool. I don't know, does he want to do it right away? Is that what he wants to ask me? I am uncomfortable, but not with the assumption of such a proposal, so much as because I am not yet used to handling all these hormones.

Jake is wearing a sweater with a wide neckline, I can see his gorgeous collarbones, moreover, he has his tongue stuck between his lips as he watches me.

Come on, I'm not that beautiful, he's blatantly faking it, but I'm not, I'm devastated by this sight.

"Aren't you going to say anything?"

"I don't like Sunghoon, I'm glad he's doing it alone for his room."

"Just as well, he's not a good person." She accentuates his beautiful smile for some reason, then lays down emitting a tired breath.

"I've noticed … but do we think so for the same reason?"

"Of course not." He answers quickly, getting back up.

How strange, he became energetic all of a sudden. I've already sensed strange vibes between Jake and Riki, now with Sunghoon too? Jay's argument is becoming more and more credible, but why is Jake always in the middle?

"Aren't you going to ask me why?"

"Would you tell me?"

He allows himself a sexy laugh, to say the least, because any other adjective would be unheard-of vulgarity. "You're also smart then."

"I try."

While Jake takes a moment to respond to messages, I start walking around looking at his legos again, honestly not sure what to do.

"What is it you want to ask me?"

"Who's your bias?"

What? Him too? Egocentric these Enhypen.

"I don't have it."

"Liar!" He playfully accuses me, pointing at me.

How can such a sweet guy also be so damn erotic? I can't even breathe properly in his presence.

"I really don't."

"So…who do you think is the most handsome?"

Damn! He's too cute! I cover my mouth to avoid showing him my perverted smirk, then cough. "You're all equally handsome."

"It's just not me, is it? That's why you don't tell me."

It's exactly the opposite thesis from Heeseung's, convinced that it's him. Does this tell me anything? Possibly, but I am too enamored with my interlocutor to reason.

"What do you need to know, then…" I giggle, softly, almost hoping he doesn't hear me.

"Has anyone else asked you?"

I laugh again, more nervously. "Never mind, is that what you wanted to ask me?"

"I like to have confirmation of things I'm curious about."

I think that's the basis, Jake, but I don't want to contradict you because you're too handsome, honestly.

"I'm the most handsome, aren't I?"

Aha, identified: narcissistic, maybe pathological?

"You have millions of fans who are crazy about you, what do you care if you are to me?"

"Then it's not really me!"

Was he testing me in his own way? I have no idea but it's cute. Even the pouty, offended expression he gives me now is to bite, tear up, devour.

Thoughts too intrusive, fantasies too lucid.

"Even if I thought that, I wouldn't tell you." I admit, covering my mouth again before laughing this time for real.

"What? - He asks, his vowels are open, his tone childlike but teasing. - And why?"

"It's…quite a sight, seeing you like this."

He smiles, his gaze thinned, and why? "Like what?"

What's wrong with me? I feel like… make him mine, in a way.

"So desperate."

"Me? - He asks theatrically outraged. - Me desperate?"

"Don't you desperately want to be the most beautiful, for me?"

What am I saying? And with what courage? Who is this person? I usually go unnoticed, and not because I'm unattractive so much as because I can't sell myself very well, which is why I'm surprised to see myself in this state.

It's called the Jake effect, I don't think there is a cure.

"Do you want to see me even more desperate?" His voice is no longer innocent, neither is his gaze. A shiver runs through every single inch of my body, so strong it leaves me shaken.

Suddently someone open the door, it seems a habit to appear in this house.

"What are you doing?"

Jake glares at him, I couldn't even think of doing that. "What?"

"Let's decide what to eat." Riki replies, annoyed by his sour tone.

"Have you eaten?" Jaeyun then asks, I think to me, no yes, of course to me!

I nod nervously. I don't even know if I'm breathing right now.

"What did you eat? Everything looks the same in the kitchen. Look you don't have to order-"

"You ordered?!" Jake takes it personally.

"I didn't actually eat, I don't know why I said yes." I explain, guessing that instead of my face they are seeing a big bell pepper.

"Why didn't you eat?"

"Is it because of what Heeseung said?" Niki asks, and I don't understand.

He has been quiet and reserved from the first moment, but he wants me to believe that he is worried about me? Come on, I'm a woman of a certain age compared to him, right? I'm not naive, I keep saying that, right?

"No, no." I belittle it with a ridiculous noise coming from my nose.

"Come on, you've been cleaning all day! I'm hungry too."

Jake can't talk anymore, what's wrong with him? Why does he keep staring at Niki? Am I like the third wheel or…?

I don't know how many seconds pass before, in the tomb-like silence that has set in, the major gets up, looks at Niki again, mumbles in an absolutely adorable way, then lightly and amicably nudges him so that he can get out of his room.

"Come on, get out, get out. Let's go eat." He tells me in a way that is much more serious than his expression.

Man, I'm curious now. Very curious indeed.

NEXT CHAPTER:

hello, this is the first time i've left a note…i just wanted to apologize for this bad english and for the mistakes you've surely found - i hope you can continue reading the story because i had a lot of fun writing it (ten chapters are ready but i have to translate them ç_ç)

#enha smut #enhypen #enhypen smut #jake smut #heeseung smut #kpop smut #enhypen heeseung #enhypen jake #enhypen niki

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