#'this part of the fandom is for the abuse victims! nobody who's actually been abused or r*ped would like that!'

[ms-demeanor]

i mean realistically many people do deserve to be the victims of targeted harassment campaigns. if you're being an asshole you deserve to be screamed at by everyone present until you stop. some people commit acts of cruelty and subsequently forfeit their reasonable right to participate in society until they've made amends.

the people of wendy's have a moral right to scream at the manager if said manager sprays them in the neck with milkshake every time they go to pick up their order

damn following up the last ask, ig it was someone in ur notes constructing an equivalence between @tting staff and getting nuked to yelling at a wendy's manager and getting kicked out. my bad lol thought that was part of ur main post

I mean this is something that's still worthwhile to bounce off of even though you're not actually responding to me.

First of all, no, I pretty much don't think that anybody deserves to be the focus of a targeted harassment campaign. At least not the kind that are spun up on tumblr or twitter. I generally think that targeted harassment campaigns don't work to change minds, they only work to torment, isolate, and attack people, which will often further entrench them in their positions.

Sometimes people doing serious antifascist work will make a discovery like, for instance "the principal of X school is a vicious antisemite" and will run an *exposure* campaign to get them removed from a position of power, but with very few exceptions when you see an online callout post for a random internet user it's nothing but abuse and an attempt to bully them off of a specific website, not an attempt to protect victims or inform people of a genuine threat. "ABC is the new alt of this person with a documented history of starting cults, DNI, block and move on" is very different than "This specific user who is on staff posts harry potter fanart and is why fascists continue to exist on tumblr, let's make sure they know what tumblr thinks of them."

You are trying to frame bullying campaigns as normal consequences for antisocial behavior, but the antisocial behaviors under discussion here are "user posted fanart broadly disliked by the community and associated with specific ideologies long after the initial fandoms were crystallized" and "is the CEO of a social media website that is implementing features that the users dislike."

"People deserve to be screamed at until they stop the bad behavior" is punitive and shitty and so broad and open to so many interpretations that you're basically saying "it's open season on screaming at people." I think that it's bad behavior to support neoliberal political candidates who prop up capitalism but it would be horrible for me to run harassment campaigns against everyone who says "vote blue no matter who" even though I think that attitude perpetuates real world harms. (And it also wouldn't convince those people to change their minds! The fact that I think they are doing something harmful doesn't give me the social license to send hundreds of people to harass them! And it wouldn't work! These kinds of campaigns don't effect change they just isolate people and erode trust and civility jesus fuck we need to be coalition building not posting callouts over whatever activity has been deemed "freak behavior" this week)

some people commit acts of cruelty and subsequently forfeit their reasonable right to participate in society until they've made amends.

oh buddy, I think I get where you're coming from here but considering the kinds of behavior under discussion this is just straight up fascist. You are literally saying that people should be banished from society for wrongthink because nobody under discussion here has actually committed an act of cruelty.

(one of the things that i'm putting under the heading of "tumblr conspiracist thinking" is "staff is currently and continually intentionally flagging certain LGBTQ tags and bloggers" - there is ample evidence that the current staff is working to unfuck flagging and blocked tags that was done long before this crew was working on it. People talk about "tumblr had to settle because their filtering disproportionately impacted lgbtq+ creators" and that is TRUE however that was a filter that was established under different owners with different policies and different staff; the implication that the current staff is guilty of trying to stifle LGBTQ+ content because a lawsuit started before the Automattic purchase of tumblr ended in a financial settlement is just bad, wrong, incorrect, faulty logic. And if I might indulge in a bit of my own conspiracist thinking: I actually suspect a lot of the flagging and tagging and blocking of trans women specifically might actually be targeted attacks of individual users by terfs - many of the things that are getting flagged as needing a community label are things that use tags that terfs follow to attack and if enough users click "this needs a community label" the post will get flagged - I don't know that that's what's going on but just operating on occam's razor I think it's a lot more likely that terfs are coordinating attacks on trans people than that there is a secret group of cryptoterfs on staff taking time out of their day to ensure that trans users get flagged, if only because I think that the vocally trans positive former members of the staff would have said something about it.)

So, given that my position is "it is unlikely that anyone on staff is intentionally targeting LGBTQ+ groups HOWEVER prior policies enacted harm against LGBTQ+ groups and there is visible evidence that the current staff is trying to repair that damage" I'm not seeing any behaviors here that call for individual employees or users to get targeted with harassment from thousands of users.

But anyway, back to the specifics of the ask:

some people commit acts of cruelty and subsequently forfeit their reasonable right to participate in society until they've made amends.

Do you have any idea how frequently amends are made and never circulated as widely as the callout post? Do you have any idea how frequently callout posts are incorrect, and exaggerate the things that need to be amended? I'm reminded of Lindsey Ellis, who was the victim of a years-long targeted harassment campaign and made multiple apologies over the years who was finally driven off of her primary platform because she carelessly misspoke and the people who had been targeting her for years were able to make a post that she had long disavowed and was a relic of her dealing with the aftermath of sexual violence go viral. The internet doesn't let people make amends; people see accusations. They see the first post, not the follow up. That's why starting these campaigns is shitty and dangerous even if you *personally* believe that you'll forgive an individual once they "make amends." (and the "amends" people usually demand are "i want this person gone from the internet forever and cut out of this part of their life" - that's not really something that's fair to ask of people when so much of the world is online these days.)

the people of wendy's have a moral right to scream at the manager if said manager sprays them in the neck with milkshake every time they go to pick up their order

No they don't. Straight up. If the manager of a wendy's sprays you in the neck with a milkshake you have the right to escalate your complaint right up the chain, take your business away and never come back, warn other people "hey the manager sprayed me with a milkshake, stay away," but you don't have the moral right to escalate the situation by screaming at them (and you certainly don't have that right if you happened to get sprayed with some milkshake while the manager was attempting to fix the frostee machine when you came to pick up your order, which I think is actually more analogous to what is happening here).

someone in ur notes constructing an equivalence between @tting staff and getting nuked to yelling at a wendy's manager and getting kicked out

A big point that I think you're missing here is that @-ing staff when there is a problem on a post or you see harassment is generally pretty acceptable (though much less effective than filing a support claim), but the issue under discussion isn't @-ing staff, it was pointing thousands of angry people at two specific people who are *part* of staff and holding those two individuals responsible for all the problems that users see with tumblr.

partyjockers got nuked because their post directed a flood of harassment at one staff member in a post where they had highlighted that user's URL and name:

This is explicitly saying "users like the one I screenshotted are the reason you're being attacked by terfs" because one member of staff posted fanart from two franchises that tumblr-the-userbase has deemed off limits.

(Do you have any idea how extreme a bubble this is? Do you walk into barnes and noble and sigh because the managers are fascists who want trans people dead because there's harry potter merch everywhere? JK rowling is a terf and a horrible fucking person and I am no longer personally comfortable engaging with that fandom but people posting fanart of a franchise are not personally attacking you even if it feels like they are disregarding your humanity; you cannot consider other people's participation in huge, popular, mainstream fandoms as a sign that they are plotting against you this is why i'm calling this conspiracist thinking the entire scorched earth conspiracy spawned from someone interpreting a staff member's art as esoteric signposts signalling their hatred of trans people. Do you remember when the stupid harry potter game came out and this entire website was despondent because it meant that people didn't care about trans people? That's not actually what it meant! What it meant is that the vast majority of people on the planet have neither a twitter nor a tumblr account and have no idea how shitty JK rowling is to trans people and they don't interpret "harry potter imagery" as "covert terf signal" they interpret it as "possibly the most mainstream fantasy series in the last fifty years")

This isn't someone calling out the manager after they spray you with a milkshake. The manager asking someone to leave after they started screaming that the cashier's earrings were hate speech.

This analogy got out of hand but please just understand that there's a difference between @-ing an account that people are paid to monitor as part of their jobs and that they have support and coworkers to help with and @-ing someone's personal account.

Nobody got a post deleted because the used @ staff, they got their posts deleted because they focused viral negative attention on individual users.

[statementlou]

I am gonna say something crazy so please don’t get angry at me. I think among all of this that is happening right now, people should leave Liam alone and i am not saying this as some crazy ass defender who believes that “boys are innocent 😣”. I am saying this because i agree with people saying that Liam is lost. He is distressed and I believe he reads all this shit that is said about him and goes back to his old addictions, which will lead only to more destruction and we are here talking not even about him, but about people AROUND HIM. Think about it for a second before you try to ease you stress and life anger by keeping on talking about him on social media. If his coping mechanism that he picked up since 1d days (that he talked about) is drinking as an answer to all stress and shit that has been happening, then if goes back to drinking every time he is distress and probably online stuff is part of it, then he will keep on hurting more people around him. And if we are really wanna be on “side of the victims” then Ignoring his person for some time will be a better option than keeping hate on him.

I just don’t want more people to be hurt by him and i am almost 90% sure that Liam lurks on socials to see what people talk about him. And let’s be honest, bad or good, nobody reacts well on online hate and again, i think it’s better for people to not cause Liam to go back to drinking (if he didn’t already) so he would go and hurt more people, because people under influence are unpredictable and completely unaware of their actions which makes them more dangerous. And Liam will become more agressive and more dangerous if he will not sober up completely . He has to stop drinking at ALL to calm down. He needs some proper therapy and have to cut off alcohol and any kind of addiction that he has (god fucking knows) from his life. I felt like Teardrops was a sign of finally taking a good turn, but i guess addictions are way more harder to beat ( never been addicted, thankfully, but had people around me who had been :) )

ok well first of yes, Liam does lurk on socials and check what people are saying about him and take to to heart: he has told us so, his sister has said so, and Maya has said so. Liam's sister has, like you, asked people to take on responsibility for his mental health by doing or not doing certain things online (this was a while back, not just now); Maya on the other hand has asked that people not enable his abusive behaviors by ignoring or excusing them, and has told us that he not only expects fans to do that but uses it as a way of avoiding taking responsibility for his actions and as a threat. No matter what any of those people say, it is neither our job nor possible for us to fix him by posting or not posting certain things! But in a way that feels different to me from any other celebrities or public figures, the relationship between the fans and the 1D guys has always been incredibly two way and reciprocal, and I do think it matters how we use the incredible power of this fandom. We've done great useful things with it in the past, and a lot of pretty silly things, and have also done things that have had profound and lasting impacts on the guys' actual lives that continue to effect them to this day, some good and some... not. We actually do have impact on their lives for better and worse. So while there is nothing we could post or not post that will cure Liam's mental health issues, also I agree, it doesn't NOT matter what we post. If nothing else, it matters because WE spend our time in this fandom and WE are impacted, and acting like the things we've found out are in any way okay (which ignoring them also would be) is unacceptable and as I said here, harms other fans. But on top of that we have been SPECIFICALLY ASKED by a victim of abuse to do something: she has asked that we stop enabling Liam's behavior by posting and not posting certain things online. So will talking about it hurt Liam, and if so should we not do that? It might distress Liam to have people tell him what he's done and is doing is not okay! That's very likely. And obviously I don't like people telling him to kill himself or posting revenge porn because those are NEVER acceptable things to do; but Liam's distress is actually less important in this situation than holding Liam accountable for his actions is. I worry about the possible impacts of that too, I think we have all pictured the worst case scenarios. But the thing is that what you are suggesting is to try to figure out how we can act to prevent an abuser from being abusive or from hurting themselves, how to do things that will keep them calm and fix them; this ISN'T POSSIBLE in any kind of real way, and the idea that is a troubling symptom of clinical codependency. It IS however important and necessary for people who care about them to tell abusers that their behavior is not okay, and that we will not look the other way when they fuck up! tldr: No abuser or addict has ever changed because things simply got easier and so they no longer "needed" to lash out or to medicate; but people have been encouraged to change by people whose good opinion they want telling them their behavior is unacceptable.

[chalkrevelations]

There are things I say to my partner in the privacy of our living room when I’m blowing off steam that I would never in my life say to friends or other family members or bosses or work colleagues or fellow community members. I do this not because I’m two-faced but because I’m human. I get frustrated, but I’m also a grownup who realizes that my frustrations and fears in that moment are not the entirety of who I am. I have a right to express them, but I do not have the right to inflict them on the people who would be hurt by them. That’s why those conversations happen in private, in a safe space of trust, where my relationship allows me to show my partner parts of me that aren’t perfect and allows my partner to show me that I don’t have to be perfect in order to deserve to be cared about. I get support through my petty moments until I can be a better person.

This latest attack on Build is a horrifying violation of privacy and trust that leaves me feeling literally nauseated. I once again reiterate that I don’t trust third-hand amateur fan translation to be accurate and contextual, particularly given the provenance of the material, but Build himself is apparently distressed enough by at least some part of the material to make a public apology. So, that being out there, I will say: This was a private matter that should have stayed private, out of respect for everyone involved. Whatever was actually said is nobody’s business except Build’s and now, unfortunately, any named individuals who this was inflicted on and who may have been hurt by it. Which, rest assured, was the intention - to hurt not only Build with this, but also, particularly, Apo and Bible, both of whom Poi has shown her dislike of and ill-will toward in the past. I suspect some people also don’t know how abuse works, and it shows, given that what was purportedly said is a reflection of Poi’s own views back at her.

Whatever the context, I see that purity cancel culture still insists on freezing people in amber in their worst moments - without recognition of any capacity for change or growth - as long as it provides ammunition for a smug, gleeful Particicution. You’re stuck on some unkind things Build supposedly said more than a year ago? Let me tell you what I’ll remember for the rest of my life: The small, broken sound of Build’s voice just a few months ago as he tried to protect Bible and Bible’s career from a sociopath, in a telephone call that he felt he needed to secretly record as evidence of how he was being manipulated and abused.

Meanwhile, I see that swathes of KP fandom continue to be complicit in Poi’s campaign of public and dehumanizing abuse of him, which now includes not only borderline revenge porn, but separating him from his friends and isolating him. This is what abuse looks like. It’s happening in front of your eyes. Do you even care? Do you actually, legitimately care about abuse, or is it just a tool for you to use to win petty shipwars and make yourself feel righteous? Because here it is. Take a good look. This is a textbook play. And if you’re participating in reposting those screenshots of private conversations and mocking Build’s relationships and spreading vituperative language about him and acting like he deserves to have his life and career destroyed, you’re enabling an abuser. You are aiding and abetting her, as the very scenario she threatened him with - in order to maintain access to him, to keep him under control and compliant - continues to get spun out. YOU are a bully and a hypocrite and an abuser, helping to prove that the most dangerous time for an abuse victim is when they leave.

But I guess some victims do have to be perfect, huh?

.

(ETA: 7/18/23, 1520 - This post is being linked on Twitter by @cherryluminary with my permission. I'm not over there, but I increasingly feel like it's important to name what's happened, and continues to happen, to Build online as what it is - abuse. Similar to to my last post that breached containment, I'm going to ask people to remember that the behavior of Build's fans reflects on him - however fair that may or may not be - and should remain above reproach. I understand being angry - I'm angry, and at more people than I've discussed publicly, at this point. But if I find out you've been descending anywhere near the level of the ugly little sociopath in my inbox who openly admitted they want Build to kill himself, I'll block you.)

[flower-boi16]

sorry for the incoming rant.

(cw for: mainly arophobia but also mentions of acephobia and mentions of people shipping an abuser with their victim)

praying for the teens and pre teens who think hazbin is *the* show for queer rep or progressive in any matter. it scares me immensely. not only the blatant fetishism and sex negativity and whatnot, but the fact people are being taught that labels *don't mean anything* and that they can do whatever they want (with a character).

yeah, "i gave my characters labels but fuck those labels ship whatever you want" is SURELY a great sentiment to leave behind. surely nobody would erase or discriminate against labels and identity, right? surely people WOULDN'T repsect labels and identities, right?*COUGH* *COUGH*

seriously the amount of ace- but more aro-phobia in that cult/clusterfuck in that fandom is insane. i hate how the aro tag has been poisoned/infiltrated by red twink no. 45 because of shipping discourse, and these people are being enabled by their "leader", never being lectured correctly. these people will ONLY listen to anyone who either agrees with them or isn't part of said label/identity. im so pissed. aros have little to none rep AT ALL and even then people will erase existing rep or come up with shitty excuses (if i hear the phrase "b-but aros can still date!!" one more time im breaking something. you dont care about the AROMANTIC dating experience, you only care about your stickmen kissing. period.). its more than exhausting.

i am not the only aro and aro-ace severly pissed off by this but im afraid there's nothing we can do. these people ship a severly traumatized victim and their assaulter together so im not suprised. at all.

all i came to know is that nobody actually fucking cares about representation or labels- they're all hopping around in fanfiction-shipping wonderland and bullying people relentlessly if they DARE to think otherwise. and they're being enabled.

-an exhausted and "done" aromantic. (i'm also on the ace spectrum but that's not as important to me right now- even though striker- the only one that's not horny 24/7 and clearly sex-repulsed or at least disgusted, is played as a big joke, but i believe someone else already said that. but that alone should raise eyebrows.)

Honestly, I don't even know what to add other than...this fandom kinda sucks. Like first bullying someone into killing themselves over shipping stuff and now this? And the fact that Viv doesn't call out ANY of this shit at all makes it worse.

Look, I'm of the opinion that we should not blame a creator for having a shitty fandom, HOWEVER, Viv needs to stop enabling her fans and say SOMETHING about this behavior.....but she isn't. Like, she could just say "hey guys stop doing this pls" buuuuut no. She's too busy whining about people criticizing her shows to actually do that.

Alastor is aroace guys, stop trying to erase that part of him just so you can drool over him. Just do that for LITTERALY ANY OTHER CHARACTER. It's that simple.

[sapphic-agent]

Can you please get into how much the fandom demonizes Rei? Like, I’m not disagreeing that she wasn’t the best mother. But people really turn this woman (who is financially, socially, AND emotionally dependent on her husband and Clan!) into some abusive mother who WANTED to burn Shoto’s face! When it’s obvious that she was begging her mother to take her away from the house because she was too stressed out from Endeavor’s influence and Touya’s death!

I don’t know, I just think she’s not a perfect mother, but nobody can be a perfect mother. She clearly did her best with what she had, and who would’ve believed her if she said Endeavor was an abusive husband and father? The police? Other heroes? No! I bet Endeavor would’ve claimed that SHE was the terrible parent and that she was suffering from PPSD (which, she probably was, four kids, two of which were born when Endeavor started getting obsessed with overcoming All Might? She definitely had that) and she would’ve ended up in the hospital no matter what.

Let's talk about it😈

So I was actually skimming through the manga where Shoto mentions this. He says that his mother was pushed and pushed by Endeavor until she just broke. And I love this because Shoto understands that his mom was in a shitty situation and never intended to hurt him. Unlike this shitty fandom, he's aware enough to see who was the abuser and who was the one who made a mistake.

Let's go over Rei's past for a minute. She:

Grew up in an environment that was at the best neglectful and at the worst abusive

Was sold like an object (and yes this is canon, the Himura Clan canonically sells their children it was a forced marriage, not an arranged marriage)

Married Endeavor and had Touya at 18

Already, she was dealt a shitty hand. Endeavor is also four years older than her, so he was 22 while she was only barely an adult. Even outside her being bought by him, there's a huge power imbalance here. Even if he was polite and nice in the beginning, she was at a major disadvantage in their "relationship."

One of my gripes with Horikoshi and the later parts of the manga is the retcon of the Todoroki past. How Shoto tells the story and how it's portrayed later are very different.

In Shoto's version, Endeavor hit Rei for defending him from Endeavor. In the Touya flashback, she tripped. In Shoto's version, Endeavor only saw his children as means to an end. In the Touya flashback, he's portrayed as caring about them. In Shoto's version, there's a menacing and villainous aura surrounding Endeavor. In the Touya flashback he's portrayed normally.

And this is done to make Endeavor look more sympathetic. Which is bad not only because he was an abuser who doesn't deserve sympathy, it also antagonizes Touya and Rei in the process.

(People could argue that Shoto's love for his mother and young age make him an unreliable narrator. But to me this is dismissing the victim. Shoto might have been young, but he recalls enough to tell it in excruciating detail. It was a huge part of his life and writing it off like that does him a disservice)

So there are two instances specifically that people demonize Rei for.

1. Shoto's Burn

Now this is the one that is her responsibility. My thing is though... No one ever said it wasn't? Least of all Rei herself. Once she saw Shoto again, she immediately apologized. During the event itself, she realized what she did and broke down and tried to fix it. She also spent 10 years in asylum paying for what she did (which is more consequence than Endeavor faced btw).

The thing no one seems to acknowledge about this is that this didn't come from nowhere. She didn't do what she did out of cruelty or hatred towards her son. She did it because Endeavor had abused her to the point of insanity. To the point where even seeing them in her kids' faces caused her to have a complete mental breakdown. Which is understandable due to the physical, verbal, financial, and sexual abuse he was putting her through.

You know, there's an irl story like this. A woman was suffering from severe PPD and other mental issues after having four kids I think it was. Doctors and everyone repeatedly told her husband that she souldn't have more kids. He didn't listen (I'm not sure if SA was involved here but I'm inclined to believe it was) and they continued to have more. Eventually one day she snapped and killed her children.

PPD is seriously dangerous when it's left untreated, even worse when that isn't the only thing going on. Rei was no doubt suffering from the ramifications of that, but on top of everything else Endeavor out her through I can't believe she didn't break earlier.

2. Touya's Situation

It baffles that people find it in themselves to blame Rei but feel sympathy towards Endeavor over Touya.

Because on top of every instance of abuse I mentioned above, Rei was also taking care of four kids completely by herself. That would be hard even without her own and Touya's mental issues.

From the manga panel I provided, she was the only one between her and Endeavor taking Touya's mental well-being seriously. She knew how having more kids would affect him and she was right. She was the one who had to deal with Touya lashing out when Endeavor ignored him (which also contributed to her breaking down and burning Shoto due to Touya emulating Endeavor).

Rei is a character who's been judged so unfairly. Partly because Endeavor fanboys, partly because Dabi/Shoto fangirls, and completely because of the misogyny that runs rampant in this fandom. She deserved so much better.

I have a fic giving Rei the justice she deserves if anyone's interested. It features my OC who happens to be Rei's quirkless younger sister. Give it a read if you want

[ca-suffit]

neilcfreak hasn't been seen in the fandom in a *long* time, so kind of fucking weird and obvious that nalyra gets a bait ask (which she knows is a bait ask) saying it *must* be bullying that caused it and listing every way neil was a good person. where tf has neilcfreak been much in the last year? besides a few months ago when she was trying to cover up for white fandom. nobody cares about u girl, nobody is rly sending these asks about u except ur own friends (or u lol).

anyway who wants neilcfreak's racist receipts :)

last year, ao3 was getting called out for never following up with their promises made in the wake of BLM 2020 to better protect users against racist harassment. neil and a black user commented on the same post, the black user replying to neil's comment u can see above of "if u don't like it make ur own site lol."

this white user (futureevilscientist) then random af pulled the asks out and tagged the black user at the start of the post to talk all this shit AT them fsr?

then later, neil shows up herself.

this is the part u cannot *cannot* say is not racist. neil is directly replying to a reblog of *someone else's main post* and placing full blame for a "call out post" on the *black* user.

she then pulls out her white jewish shit to speak over the main topic, which is racism / antiblackness.

playing oppression olympics can be done by any marginalized group but it usually works the best for white ppl because white ppl get the most sympathy when doing this (u want the most shining example, how often are we talking about white gay oppression in this fandom above racism / antiblackness, which is the *actual theme* of the show...or even gay oppression through a black pov, since u see louis experience that constantly. how much are we told that this show is rly about white gays and nothing else?). ppl assume whiteness is more innocent by default so will pile more on a black user for "being aggressive" towards a *white* jewish user without needing any proof. that's what neil was counting on here. she also then had a bizarre, loud breakdown on her account for extra assurance she'd be seen as "the real victim" (for making a stupidly racist comment in public). ohh yeah weaponize those white tears girl. she then "quit" tumblr for a while and when she came back, as mentioned in the linked post above, she had to again mention "drama" for good measure. "remember how I was bullied off this site u guys :("

white fandom was all over her dramatic distraction posts btw (nalyra commented on them too, so she is v aware this happened). v few people reached out to the black user or cared about the shit they were dealing with.

these white fandom ppl *never* have any receipts of bullying either, they just *say* it happens and flock to give hugs so it looks like lots of support is happening for a real "issue." but it's not real. everything they do is meant to manipulate u. this nalyra ask is still doing that.

when ur told what to think about someone or u can't find evidence of things happening beyond what anyone, even a group of ppl, *tells u* is happening then u need to rly remain suspicious of the reality of it.

these are asks that the black user got after this stuff happened. so now we've created a new issue from nothing and we're not talking about racism or how ur bullying a black user over literally nothing anymore. now it's suddenly all about poor neilcfreak and her white jewish identity and victimhood from a big, bad black fan. she's gotta make this all make her look like the real victim to cover up how embarrassed and stupid she felt for being called out on saying racist shit.

this is why white ppl need to understand these abusive techniques and get on ppl's ass when they pull this, not just leave it up to black and brown ppl to do. white fandom will cry all the white tears possible and claim ur talking over a white jewish person, being antisemitic. it's an attempt to emotionally manipulate u, keep talking (think of how often claims of antisemitism are used to shut down anyone being pro palestine, it's the same shit). this is racism. this is weaponizing an identity to cause harm to a black person cuz u were caught saying racist shit and want to deflect. if neilcfreak wasn't a huge racist she'd have *also* called this out and told ppl to stop doing this on her behalf. that would require her pulling her head out of her ass first tho and not sending these anons herself prbly.

I was looking for a different receipt to end on but found this instead, so let's talk about this too since we're here

here's neil after this shit went down, trying to make anne rice all kinds of marginalized identities so ppl can excuse her abusive shit too. she never said she was queer and she never identified as trans. u can't just label ppl shit because stuff they said sounds "close enough." she did enough harm as a cishet white woman can u all fuck off already with wanting to find more excuses for never wanting anyone to criticize this piece of shit.

good riddance, wretched bitch.

[smytherines]

001| Curtwen and 002|Owen Carvour for the ask game

Oooohhh thank you!

001- curtwen

When I started shipping it: I watched Spies for the first time in late October or early November 2023, and I liked it but I didn't think about it again until January 2024 when I decided to rewatch it. The second time I watched Spies they broke my brain, and I've been here ever since

My thoughts: *45 continuous minutes of stressed out laughter* oh boy. Um. So many thoughts really, but most of them center around curtwen making me incredibly sad

What makes me happy about them: I genuinely believe they loved each other. That they bantered and bickered like an old married couple, but that they really tried the best they could to be together, even if most of the time they had to be apart. I believe Curt when he talks about how Owen was his best friend, and I think Owen felt the same way right up until the fall

What makes me sad about them: everything else

Things done in fanfic that annoy me: making pre-fall Owen into a heartless monster who is borderline (or just outright) abusive to a helpless, dopey babygirlified version of Curt. Those versions of the characters are unrecognizable to me

Things I look for in fanfic: for their relationship, whether working or romantic, to feel like an actual partnership with two people who genuinely care about each other. I'm also just a sucker for great banter

Who I'd be comfortable with them ending up with, if not each other: nobody, it's very much a "they were made for each other, do not subject anyone else to these men" situation for me

My happily ever after for them: actually I wrote a whole fic about this! But it would just be them getting out of the spy game and running off somewhere, just having a little house together and finally getting to have a real relationship

Who is the big spoon/little spoon: I think they switch it up. Maybe with Owen being the big spoon a little more often? I do think the fandom overlooks Curt's big spoon potential though

What is their favorite non-sexual activity: is it cheating to say spying? I think Curt would despise stakeouts at first because he can't keep still, but the more they work together (and especially once they get together) I think they would both start to kind of enjoy stakeouts because they get to talk and spend time together and not necessarily have all the pressure and stress of the other parts of their job

002- Owen Carvour

How I feel about this character: oh boy there aren't enough words. I could focus on so many things here, but they all come back to disability eventually. While Owen Carvour isn't established in canon to be disabled after the fall, in the real world you do not get up and walk away after a fall like that, especially not after a building explodes on you. In the real world, the most likely result would be broken bones, traumatic brain injury, spinal cord injury, burns from the explosion, etc. There aren't a ton of canonically disabled characters out there, so disability tends to be something that has to be read subtextually like this, often in the origin stories of antagonists or villains. The whole become disabled become evil trope.

I find myself with a lot of empathy for characters who go through something horrifying, something that would be disabling in the real world, and their grief and trauma manifest in horrifying ways. People who are not perfect victims, who spiral and lash out and lose themselves and ruminate, who turn their pain into ammunition. Grief that manifests as sadness and crying and self-hatred tends to be a lot more accessible and relatable than grief that manifests as boiling white hot rage. But as a disabled person who thinks of Owen as a disabled character, I have a lot of empathy for the rage. Maybe I shouldn't, but I do.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: just Agent Curt Mega

Non-romantic OTP: I love the idea of Barb and Owen being friends. I think they definitely had some interests in common and would've been such an interesting dynamic

Unpopular opinion of this character: I guess one of my most unpopular opinions is that I think it does a big disservice to the character and the story to reduce Owen down to a petty ex who was always sort of like that, who wants nothing else beyond petty personal revenge on the man who wronged him. To paint it as a toxic reaction to a bad breakup instead of a massive trauma that left him seriously injured and isolated and heartbroken, that stole his entire life from him.

I absolutely believe getting revenge on Curt was a primary motivation for Owen, but I don't think he planned to torture or kill Curt until Curt interrupted his arms deal. I think Owen lost his identity, his life, his job, his relationship, everything that mattered to him in the fall, and if Curt hadn't come back and chased him down, Owen would've been satisfied operating from the shadows and taking (from his perspective, at least) the only thing Curt actually loves- spying. But I don't think that's his only motivation. By the time we meet DMA, Owen has already been working with the Baron for some time, he definitely would've started this project before Curt ever came back, so I don't buy the idea that he started all this to lure Curt in. I think its giving Owen a bit too much credit to suggest he rigged the entire scenario. I don't think Curt personally being there was part of the plan, I think it derailed the plan.

A spy destroyed his life, him being a spy destroyed his life, his agency and his partner abandoned him to die, having a secret with another man ruined him. I get why he wants a world without agencies, without spies, without secrets. He is going to single handedly dismantle everything Curt ever believed in because those are the things Owen once believed in, the things that put him in that facility and led to him losing everything

It is about Curt, but its about a lot more than Curt too. I think Owen would be very aware of what the British government would do to him if they knew he was gay, I think he would be very aware that global superpowers like the US, UK, & USSR are working on surveillance technology, that someday soon somebody will hold all the world's secrets. I think he feels like he stands a better chance with Chimera than he does with the government that would imprison him or force him into "chemical castration" if they knew what he was. A government that left him for dead. His ideological reasons for joining Chimera as just as interesting to me as his personal reasons

One thing I wish had happened in canon: the villain monologue and the staircase scene have Owen laying out all his ideological reasons for doing what he's doing, beyond insulting Curt he doesn't get personal about anything, even when Curt tries to bring up personal things between them. I get why there wasn't, but I do sort of wish there had been a line or two that really expanded on what "the horror of staying alive" meant to Owen, some tiny glance at what his post-fall world was really like. Something that slips out and Curt tries to pull at that thread and Owen just shuts it down, or the thought of it makes him even angrier. Things end the same way, and I do think Joey Richter does an incredible, incredible job of making you feel something for Owen in the staircase scene, but I do wish we had a little bit more of a mask-dropping moment

My OTP: curtwen

My crossover ship: I would not inflict these men on anyone else

A headcanon fact: uhm. Shit. I've already typed so much so let's keep this simple- I headcanon him as autistic

[demonsfate]

guilty as charged (mun edition) // accepting // anonymous asked . . . Have you ever unfollowed a blog? What were the reasons?

All the time LOL. Most often I unfollow unactive blogs, typically blogs that have been inactive for a year or damn near it. Why do I bother? Because sometimes I'll notice my dash is very slow and I'm like "daaamn I've got [this many] followers... how come nothin's happenin?" Then I realize oh wait, a lotta my mutuals became inactive lol. So softblocking them is a good way to gage how many active followers I actually have.

Other times I've unfollowed a blog just because I personally didn't vibe with the mun's ooc posts, or content they're putting out. Or, one time when somebody was just reblogging TOO many posts that were completely unrelated to their muse, and was just spamming the dashboard with unrelated fandom reblogs as if they were a personal or somethin. I don't mind a lotta ooc posts, but I do start drawing the line when my dash gets spammed with completely different fandom posts that aren't related to their muse in any way.

The most controversial time I unfollowed somebody, and this may kinda count as drama but not really, was this K.ingdom Hearts blog. For some reason, my Riddler blog took MONTHS to pick up. I mean, I had it for 4 months and couldn't get a single follow back or anything. I have no clue why - literally nobody wanted to write with me then. (Which is really bizarre, given that, I think at one point, it had 400 followers - many ppl started writing with me later). I'm gonna guess it's because my blog had dark themes / backgrounds. (I wrote my Eddie as a CSA survivor - this may be semi important later)

Anyway, a confession on one of 'em RP confession blogs was expressin' how sad they were that nobody was writing with them, I agreed with it too, also offering I'd write with 'em too. A KH blog came up to me and saying they were having the same problem. I was about to learn a big lesson in writing with them just 'cos I was sympathetic LOOOL. So basically I followed, and we kinda talked on and off for a couple weeks, we wrote a lil. But then their topics started getting ... weirder, horrible even.

Then suddenly, their posts got super fucking crazy. Like they BRAGGED about their tags were apparently QUOTES from the Columbine shooting and the Jamestown cult tragedy?! I didn't fuckin' know 'cos who would??? And like when I went to unfollow them, they were having a thread where the character casually threatens to rape his brother and it's like holy shiiiiiiiiiit. So of course, I hardblocked 'em for that clownery.

Unfortunately, I started getting anon hate on my blog (obvs from him). I got like 4 anon hates in a row - but I blocked the anon and well, that did that lol. Some of the anon hates were like "I thought you liked dark content..." and it's like yeah, when HANDLED WITH RESPECT LMAO. My character was written as a CSA survivor as a background, I don't actually write the fuckin' act out, it's just part of his story. And like, it's also there to show how male victims handle it, and how a lot of sexual abuse survivors tend to turn to hard drugs to cope with it. my BLOG HAD NOTHING THAT WAS GLORIFYING / USING TRUE CRIME SHIT & THEN HAVING MY CHARACTER THREATENING TO UGHGHHH. And like, I didn't call 'em out, didn't mention it on my blog. They can write whatever the fuck they want, I just don't want anything to do with that stuff lmao. So I blocked them.

Then I got one of their mutuals messaging me like "why did you block [user]? they thought you were good friends with them. they're really hurt :(" and it's like?? I kinda talked to them every now & then thru DMS, that's it. We never exchanged discords ffs, we were far from "friends" never mind good friends lmao. Also don't be wildin' on your dashboard, ppl are likely to become uncomfortable and unfollow.

[anti-ao3]

okay, sorry to hammer on the topic of bullying, but the whole "bully with a sad backstory" belief is extremely harmful to victims/survivors.

idk where it started, but firstly, i do think that school shootings influence this belief. everyone always says that school shooters have been bullied and/or abused at home, which might be true sometimes. but that isn't the root of the problem. the root is white supremacy. it's lack of gun control. because if all victims of bullying became school shooters, then where are all the marginalized groups, like black kids, disabled kids, women, lgbt+ kids etc.? if anything, though, they would probably be demonized. since most school shooters are white, then you'll see them being treated like poor little guys on the internet. i'm talking mainly about the usa, but here in brazil, where i live, we also have school shootings and we learn that the shooters were part of neonazi communities online.

fiction does reinforce this, to the dickheads who think "fiction doesn't affect reality". there are too many bully characters to possibly mention here. but most of them have something in common, they're abused and/or neglected at home, or maybe they're also bullied. but trust me, that is very uncommon in real life. i only had ONE bully who was also mistreated. all my other bullies were privileged, rich kids that just loved making my existence unbearable. and again, many of the victims of bullying i knew, including myself, weren't white, or they were disabled and/or fat. before anyone says it, yes, i'm very aware that bullies learn from their parents and families. but that doesn't always mean they're ABUSED, too. if anything, their families probably encourage their kids being an asshole to minorities.

the reason i'm saying all of this is that bullying is not treated seriously at all. i've been dismissed and ignored several times when i tried to open up about my bullying, including to my school and actual therapists. ppl often tell me it wasn't "that bad" or i'm exaggerating, and it was just "kids being kids" or "boys being boys". or worse, they'll tell me that i have to acknowledge that maybe my bullies/abusers had a tragic backstory too, and i have to forgive them. which is absolute bullshit.

bullying ruined my life. on top of my abusive household, i've become insecure, terrified of social interactions, of group assignments, of presentations, parties and so on. i'm always expecting everyone to hate me. i keep thinking everyone is looking at me and laughing at me behind my back. basically, i've become paranoid. i can't trust anyone. and that probably explains why i seriously hate bully characters and the way society treats bullies overall. i actually remember making a post about bullying on tumblr, and some idiot tried to make it about the bullies and how "they're victims, too".

maybe i'm being too unfair or too harsh because of my personal experience, but i feel very unwelcome in fandoms where bully characters are beloved. nobody thinks my trauma with bullying is valid. society tells me it's not actually abusive or traumatic. no matter how many lives we lose to bullying, nobody cares. and to be reminded of that when i want to interact with a media i like is so daunting.

[sadistpet]

it's munday and you know what that means . here is me rambling about raikov ( + volgin ) and a common perception of him because im annoying and talkative <3 cw for mentions of sa / abusive relationships

a Lot of people in the fandom view raikov as yet another victim to volgin, being forced into being his lover and only being cruel to his soldiers to appeal to volgin. which like. people can view it however they want, you do you. but i also think that interpretation is deeply boring and cliché and . kind of undermines raikov as a character and reduces him to some... damsel in distress ? i feel like it robs raikov of his agency as a character who's able to make his own decisions ; he can't have chosen this, he had to have been forced into it. and it's silly, because there's so much canon evidence inferring the complete opposite ?

i think this ties into the idea i mentioned that volgin's relationship to raikov was meant to indicate a more tender and "human" aspect to his character, but it just wasn't as blatant as it could've been. take the cutscenes for example ; we get two cutscenes that feature a focus on both eva and raikov's nude bodies. eva is covered in scars, which she mentions are from volgin. they're part of her, cut into her skin, permanent. she didn't want them, and she can't get rid of them if she tries, unless it's via surgery.

raikov, on the other hand, has absolutely flawless skin with no signs of scarring. the only indication he has a connection to volgin is his underwear with a lightning bolt. and that's something removable, something he could easily take off if he wanted. it's under his clothes, after all, where nobody can see -- and still he wears them. why would he if he didn't want to ? sure, you could come up with reasons why, but it seems pretty obvious that he's wearing them by choice. and them being a removable piece of clothing rather than permanent scarring further implies it's something he chooses, and something that volgin is, surprisingly, fine with.

getting into the way volgin acts in regards to raikov. like, oh my actual god, where do i begin. in terms of the infamous homo-picture, we can see volgin genuinely smiling. not sadistically, but like, actual, meeting-the-eyes smile. ignore raikov being the irl depiction of the 😩 emoji because he's getting his dick grabbed. the fact this is a candid picture too implies that this is just how he is around raikov ; genuine, lets his guard down.

not to mention the fact he beats the shit out of snake EXPLICITLY FOR HURTING RAIKOV. like. you cannot get more blatant than him saying "i will make him pay for hurting ivan" and then proceeding to absolutely pummel snake within an inch of his life. not for the legacy, not for the deception, or anything even remotely related to the main plot -- no, it's for hurting ivan. i guess you could say it's a possessive thing, but that's disproven with his battle dialogue if you wear the raikov mask. he says that he thought ivan had been killed. hence, why would it be something possessive ?

IN ADDITION TO THAT. even when he realises that snake isn't raikov, he never lays a hand on him. there's the initial crotch grab, and after that he shoves snake away, but he doesn't EVER hurt him again until snake's raikov mask is removed. only THEN does he beat him. the entire time that snake wears the raikov mask during that scene, volgin doesn't lay a finger on him, doesn't use his electricity powers on him, despite the fact he absolutely could and knows that it isn't raikov.

by putting on the raikov mask during volgin's battle, it gives us even more insight to this. volgin stops attacking you, freezes up, visibly trembles and slowly walks towards snake thinking he's raikov. even his lines -- "ivan. ivan? ivan! is it really you? i thought you'd been killed..." // "how dare you!" // "you will pay for what you did to ivan!" // "i will avenge ivan!" -- all imply that he truly cares about raikov. this is even more evident when coupled with the fact he attacks you even more violently at this point.

and that's not even mentioning the blatant contrast between how he reacts towards tatyana being manhandled by ocelot, who essentially threatens to kill her, and how he reacts after finding out snake must've hurt raikov. he truly does not give a shit about her ( "do as you like." ), he doesn't see any qualms with hurting her or killing her. but raikov ? he beats snake to a pulp for hurting him. he can't even bring himself to harm someone that looks like raikov, even when he knows it's not actually him.

raikov's existence as a joke character is a detriment when trying to find out more about his own introspection and views, but portable ops' recruitment dialogue for him gives us a very small, but very intriguing look into his personality. he is completely different from when we see him in mgs3. he's withdrawn and nearly silent, more awkward and visibly cowardly. far removed from the cocky, snarky, sadistic version we see in snake eater. the only times he speaks up are when revenge is mentioned, but more poignantly, when volgin is mentioned. when he's spoken to by campbell, he remains almost entirely silent besides six lines, two of which are explicitly about volgin :

"…bastard! how could you know!? wait, i get it… you’re an agent of the man they call snake. the yankee who killed the colonel at groznyj grad! and you came all this way to gloat over me…!" "you want me… to join the villain who killed the colonel? not a chance…"

it's clear from these lines alone that raikov is still, six years later, extremely broken up over volgin's death. or, well, "death", but ykno. his entire personality has shifted into one far more morose and dour, and he only speaks up and shows genuine emotion in his speech when it's about volgin. he refuses to join big boss' team because big boss killed volgin. he remembers big boss in the first place for that exact reason. volgin's death has evidently left its mark on raikov. he's not the same man. sure, you could say maybe he's upset because volgin dying meant he lost the person protecting him from retribution, and he lost all his privileges. but then, why doesn't he make any attempt to climb the ranks of big boss' group the same way ? "because it's big boss' group, and he hates big boss!" yes. because big boss killed his lover. he calls big boss a villain for what he did to volgin, so it's clear he doesn't view what happened as a positive. this goes double for the fact he seems to not care at all about being praised and promoted among the ranks of the soviet armed forces. he only cares about revenge.

when you look at it all, it's blatantly obvious that volgin cares about raikov in a way he exhibits with nobody else. and raikov is heavily implied to feel the same way. raikov isn't just another of volgin's lovers, he's someone that volgin genuinely cares about. reducing raikov's character to some kind of damsel coerced into this relationship is not only, in my opinion, deeply cliché and boring, but it goes against all the evidence presented in the games ?

there's some other interpretations i'm not personally a fan of, but do find intriguing and interesting ( such as raikov being EVA / a spy, ) but this one irks me immensely to the point where i feel like i have to refute it. volgin is irredeemably evil, yes. he can be irredeemably evil and also genuinely love raikov. and the small amount we've seen into raikov's mentality support that the feeling is, in fact, mutual. sure, there's claims to make about age disparity and power imbalances, but it's stated pretty clearly ingame - multiple times in fact - that volgin views raikov as an equal.

framing raikov as some kind of victim or acting on harmful urges etc not only goes against the canon, but it strips away the character's ability to make his own decisions. why must he be a victim ? is it not possible - and probable, given the evidence - that he is just as bad as volgin, if not worse, and that's why they're drawn to each other ? is it not possible he chose to be volgin's lover out of a genuine desire for something, be that love or intimacy in general ? villains can be villains and still love like everyone else. they can be evil and still love healthily and genuinely. these things aren't mutually exclusive and acting like they are is very cartoonish !

so yeah. tldr the games heavily imply if not outright state that volgin and raikov legitimately and truly care for and love each other beyond that of just a physical, sexual relationship, and the depiction of raikov as a victim of volgin is a huge disservice to his character and also goes against what we've seen in canon

[steviewashere]

Let's have a quick little conversation, Stranger Things fandom. This is a conversation for everybody, including those who create the amazing things we pass around our table of stories like bowls of mashed potatoes.

A lot of you guys are fucking mean. And I'm not talking regular mean. I'm talking a rotting, moldy, dilapidating, squelching sort of mean. I should know, I've given way too many speeches about this kind of shit. So, you're gonna listen good.

The new trend I'm seeing is bullying the bodacious babes within our community, and I won't fucking stand for it. I've had my fair share of bullying, both as the victim and as a bystander, and it's exhausting to have it spread into such a tight-knit space like this.

Let me reintroduce you to some wonderful technology on here, you hateful pieces of shit (no, I'm not talking about the people who are actually nice, but please continue to read this). (And, I'm not gonna be nice to people who are blowing up babe's Tumblr inboxes and anon messages and Twitter replies and AO3 comments. Or people sending death threats and threats of sexual violence. Because you don't deserve kindness. Not anymore.)

There's a "close tab" button located conveniently below your address bar. There's also a little bar on the side of your screen that lets you scroll all willy-nilly away from things you don't like. AND there's a "block" button! Oh, let's not forget the "mute tag" button! (Explosion sound effects here.) Isn't that crazy?! You can block anybody you want. You can scroll away. You can close out of a fic you're reading or a fanart you're viewing.

Isn't that wonderful? Because then, you don't ever have to see it again.

Fandom is a space for everybody, no matter what someone enjoys. Even if it's dead dove fics or unconventional kinks or relationship dynamics that may come off as "abusive" or "toxic".

If topics that are considered unsightly to you really bother the fuck outta your soul, then just ignore 'em. Ignore them. Leave them alone. Art, no matter the form, has always been made to make a statement; art is meant to be uncomfortable sometimes; art comforts those who may have gone through the same or similar experience.

Not everything is for you. That's what's so wonderful about tag filtering and muting tags and blocking users and content. That's what's so wonderful about the internet. You can get away from things that would otherwise be triggering for you.

You don't have to read everything. Or view everything. Or like everything.

Somebody else will like that piece of art, guaranteed.

And to artists, whether you're a writer or a painter or a scrapbooker or whatever you do that pleases your senses, continue to create. Continue to create because you do enjoy it, even if sometimes it seems that nobody does. Take breaks as needed. Walk away if you have to. That's alright. Taking care of yourself is so important and nobody is allowed to tell you otherwise. But at the end of the day, you are the poet and the artist and the muser. You are the creator.

The first person you should create for, because all fan work is self-indulgent on some level, is yourself. Always create for you. Create because it's something primal. Because it's an instinct.

Not everything is beautiful. But art can be beautiful. You make it beautiful. Your minds are beautiful. Everybody is gorgeous.

Fandom is like a museum, babes. Sometimes, the creator is going to be walking the same room as you, viewing their paintings sidelong. Keep your voices down, move on if you don't like the painting they made, and find something you do like. You're allowed to do that.

But by the gods, be thoughtful, be kind, and remember that the creator is always standing behind you in the art hall. And they're sharing their craft with you. And they don't have to. And sometimes they don't want to. But they do it anyway. Because it's important to create and tell their story and reflect on what is otherwise something shitty.

Telling stories is part of human nature. We've been doing it for centuries. It's in our blood. Don't be the reason somebody's blood turns cold or their pens fall dried or their mouths clink shut. Art is an objectively subjective form of culture, it changes from where you're going to where you've been and it's always changing and not every aspect is for you.

You do it for you, though. At the end of the day, your art should matter because it's an appendage of you. You're wonderful, you're beautiful, you're talented, and you're worthy of what you do. Because you're doing it. At the end of the day, you're doing it. That's something that matters.

But what matters most?

You do. You're the heart of everything you do. You're part of the thousands of arteries in the community we've built, you are the vessel carrying life in this community. And damnit, what a good job you do. You matter. At the end of the day, you will always matter.

Always. You will always matter.

[trekkele]

"# i think If you want a genuine critique of Batman then Leslie and her pacifism is far more interesting"

So true. Unfortunately nobody's been writing her well since the 90s or '00s. At least, I didn't come across anything featuring her in a well thought out way.

I'm split on counting War Games because 'she would not fucking do that' as people say. However, it is her position on morality taken to the twisted extreme. Still, intentionally killing or faking it, is very emotionally hurtful, like trauma inducing hurtful. Both for Steph and the Batfam and her mother.

Looked up the exact definition of pacifism and, well:

"Pacifism is a policy or doctrine of rejecting war and violence in solving disputes"

She kinda did use violence (emotional and body violating and zero consent from removing Steph from her life) to solve a dispute. Or to "free" Steph of her bat-duties, but it still counts.

Would love for Leslie to go after other batfam members and not just Bruce and argue with them about their methods.

Actually i think Stephanies death, either by medical negligence or a failure of her support system, is a natural consequence of Leslies brand of pacifism and while “She, personally, might not fucking do that” her philosophy might so its not as ooc as id like it to be.

So to discuss Leslie i think i have to establish two things 1. She suffers from being a (mostly) anti Batman character in a Batman comic* and

2. She and Jason are actually on two ends of a spectrum, with Leslie being “it is better to be the victim of violence then the perpetrator of it” and Jason being “it is better to enact unspeakable violence then be the victim of it”. With Bruce in the middle like “can we please get some nuance in here can we please get some fucking nuance” which is. Very funny actually.

(Its funny because Bruce, by being Batman, has basically decided to become the nuance - he will be violent for you, and by being so good at violence he can minimize the amount of actual violence needed)

So by letting Steph die, Leslie is essentially saying “no amount of violence can save us, isnt it better to die then without having inflicted it upon others?” Which is so very Ghandi of her, but also fucking insane and yeah Bruce was 100% right to never trust her again after that.

She is also - ok so the thing is, in-universe, being a teenage vigilante is. It’s basically like being a dance kid. Its going to have a profound and everlasting effect on the kids mental and physical health, there are side effects we still don’t entirely understand, but for the most part its just. Something some kids do!! Some of them insist on doing it (dick, damian (<-i have thoughts about why Bruce didnt want to give Damian robin ok) some of them realize it isnt good for them but cant really give it up (jason, maybe tim?) some of them are in it just for their stage moms (cissie king-jones) and some of them suffer long term consequences due to insufficient parental supervision (kon, pre-nu52) etc etc. Leslie is the mom in the corner who thinks allowing her kid to perform or even learn ballet in a studio is a slippery slide to abuse. She thinks no kid should ever be in that environment, and by Bruce allowing Dick to do so, despite Bruces reluctance in the matter and almost oppressive supervision, he has doomed an entire generation of kids.

She is never going to criticize anyone else in the batfam, because to do so would be admitting that kids have agency beyond what adults believe is best for them, and admitting that means being unable to push her “correct” views upon them.

Leslie is actually a pretty good stand in for fandom in that way; refuses to allow anyone but Bruce agency and independent thought, refuses to place blame anywhere but Bruce, insists a difference of opinion is grounds for dismissal of personhood and respect, and believes Gotham would be better off if Batman never existed.

(Once again i have no idea if i answered your question/addressed your ask. Sorry)

[kleenexwoman]

3, 8

8: I'm answering this one first because fandom lol.

I think people are off a lot when they say that a male character is female-coded. A lot of the time what they mean is that a character does not live up to the standards of masculinity set by the universe of the media itself, or that other characters in the show consider them less than masculine, or that they're portrayed as a realistic victim of abuse.

Or, sometimes, they just have transfem vibes. Why? Dunno. Vibes.

Now, some female coding is deliberate. I'll swear on a stack of Celluloid Closets that Steve and Bucky swap off the "girl" parts in the MCU in ways that have everything to do with the relationship the characters have to their genre. It has to do with who gets captured and rescued in what way, and it's something that plays into the homoeroticism of their relationship.

But that's different than me going, "Steve might like to wear panties but he has masculinity issues but Bucky envies dames." That's Vibes and me projecting because I think manly men in lingerie are pretty. Big shrug, dance for me.

There are definitely fandoms where people lean into dudes being "female coded" when they're:

Denigrated for their apparent lack of masculinity by other characters. Usually this says a lot more about the other characters, sry.

Class difference class difference class difference. Masculinity and the working class are socially conflated because it helps keep patriarchal capitalism churning. If your guy is "feminine" for traits that he shares with Hannibal Lector, who is about as feminine as a vagina dentata, then he's not coded feminine. He's coded rich.

Short kings. I'm sorry, does nobody love petit butches? Smol mascs? Pocket princes?

3: I have seen many run-of-the-mill bad takes on Tumblr. Many of them I respond to. Some belong in their tags, shaming people, and I don't think I shall choose to dignify them.

Just about the worst take I've seen on Tumblr was reactionary, tbh.

My bestie runs @loveisintheearth , a neat rock blog that shares fascinating geological information along with some metaphysical uses and just tons of shiny rock pics.

Now, some rocks have been used over the years for physical as well as metaphysical effects in magical talismans. I'm actually editing a book about it right now. It's not exactly simple, or anyone would be able to grab a chunk of whatever and suddenly get healthy, rich, wise, or laid. It's shit like, you have to calculate when Venus is trine the seventh mansion of Jupiter and sacrifice a silver feather while chanting and burning heliotrope as you carve the secret name of the angel Raziel into turquoise.

And also, y'know, it's a moot point if you don't believe in magic in the first place. Go on with your day, y'know?

So this person rocks up and demands, like, academic proof that wearing citrine can lower your cholesterol or whatever. From a rock blog online that posts, like, really cool pictures of bismuth inclusions.

Okay. Not the place to do it, but bestie obligingly posts a disclaimer that, uh, "Look at these neat lapis orbs!" isn't a place for medical advice. The information was frankly more of an intellectual curiosity.

Out of my own curiosity, I manage to track down the website that @loveisintheearth got the information from and ask the lady who posted it about where she got it. I mean, there are plenty of historical texts about the use of rocks in--

Her spirit guides.

Okay, did she try it out? Ask for detail? So further research?

NOPE. Just slapped it up there.

Context is everything. Don't expect a casual rock blog to offer you solid medical advice. But also, if you have spirit guides who tell you that citrine can help you lower your cholesterol, ask them for details.

[roomeight]

By sheer coincidence I landed on your blog via a suggested follow on my dashboard, and it was a wild ride but truly, I must thank you for your rightful attitude. I'd been a part of Blur fandom way back in 2010 and pretty obsessed with it and GC from around 2010-2014; it's been several years that I've practically removed myself from the fandom entirely but for the whole period I was immersed in it I had absolutely no idea and had never heard anything to do with the extensive and longstanding abuse allegations that have been exposed and which you duly bring forth and discuss. I've had the unfortunate albeit common misfortune of experiencing the same sort of toxic and predatory relationship dynamics personally and I couldn't even begin to specify just how very harmful and caustic such unsound exchanges and affairs involving said sort of power imbalance, manipulation, gaslighting and coercion are and how devastating it is to be put through it all. Becoming aware that he may very well be (is) a broad reaching perpetrator of such immoral exploit is most upsetting and revolting, specially for one who has actually been a victim of that before. Though it may be heartbreaking to face the truth and have somebody you admire uncovered as a violator and morally askew; more than any degree of devotion to a public figure, I wish nobody else should ever fall pray to that sort of scheme, and consequentially, exposing offenders and making their violations known is an essential work and a matter of ethic, as well as holding the culprits accountable. Even if it may not be partially or entirely factual, I'll always take the victims' side and believe their testimonials first, until and if they ever get disproved.

Thank you for your message, and I'm sorry to hear that happened to you. ♥️😞 Unfortunately this is way too common these days with how much easier social media has made connecting people to celebrities - the Justin Roiland case recently is a good example of how easy it is to take advantage of fans. Thank you for acknowledging the difficulty, I have always hated it, was in denial about him for so long by thinking he cleaned up after 2013 - I left and came back shortly after you left it sounds like.. but he just got better at hiding it. :( Even if you go back on waybackmachine to see his twitter it's crazy how wildly more interactive he was.

[eisforeidolon]

Just in case others didn’t know, Jensen’s answer about art interpretation is almost verbatim from an answer he gave in 2015. The hellers aren’t “wearing him down” He has consistently given that same answer for years. It has NOTHING to do with canon, and everything to do with acknowledging people relate to things differently. The fact they even admit they’re trying to “wear Jensen down,” is so abusive. They KNOW there is a militant derangement syndrome where people literally lose their jobs and reputations for not bending knee to the mobs that go after them, and they’re actively exploiting that- hoping Jensen feels fear enough that he will cave and capitulate. It’s disgusting. These are people who are SO self righteous and judgmental of others, and can’t see that they are, by FAR, the most manipulative, regressive abusers in fandom spaces. If anyone tried to “wear them down” about something, all we would hear is “you’re not respecting me!” “This is harassment!” “Your aggression is toxic!” And they would be RIGHT! But they never apply that to themselves and how they treat Jared and Jensen

Huh. I didn't know he'd talked about interpretation in general back that far (although to be fair, they've done so many cons over so many years, aside from the controversial or noteworthy stuff, it's a lot to remember all of it). Do you have the specific con or video of that? I do know in every statement I can recall it's never been about personally hating the ship or shippers, just not understanding where it's coming from (fair) and being annoyed when they tried to push it on him and make him validate it as part of his acting/part of the canon (more than fair).

In the end, they've spent years being demanding, abusive, slanderous, and outright deranged - and then try to claim they're the victims. It's just a complete denial of reality. No one ever owed them anything but the right to have their fanfic in fan spaces and not watch the show if they didn't like what it was actually about.

It's also a great point about how they'd react if anyone tried to "wear them down" the way they've badgered Jensen (and anyone else that doesn't immediately cave to them) for years, because nobody even has to try to actively change their minds - just to exist while not agreeing with them. I remember specifically when they asked some crew person on twitter about when the first appearance of the "bisexual plaid" shirt was and they LOST THEIR FUCKING MINDS at the answer there was no such thing, wailing and gnashing their teeth about being attacked and invalidated for getting an answer they didn't like to a question they chose to ask. It would be funny how absurd it is if they weren't so viciously hateful.

[ca-suffit]

How do you rationalize the violence of the characters on this show? Imo, it's easier when it's self defense or when they're just killing to feed, specially the latter since most are just extras and we don't get to know or be attached to those characters. But there are more complicated cases, including physical and psychological abuse and literally everybody has been the abused and the abuser at some point. Not to/with each other, but definitely other people. There is power imbalance in all of the dynamics. Some may forget that since they keep jumping through timelines where things are perfectly okay or they're closer to making amends and making up. And also because the actors are friends and have chemistry on screen (speaking about the whole cast, not any duo in particular). But technically all main characters have abused each other. Nobody is "safe". So, where to draw the line? Psychological abuse? Physical abuse? The severity of the action (like continuously torturing someone who can't respond or match your strength is definitely worse than one punch, for example)? The frequency of the action, like, as long as it happened once it's okay? When a character is still redeemable/forgivable giving the fact they are immortals, so, in theory, they have eternity to better themselves and see if they can make it work? Or should they all be narratively punished (end up alone, suffering, locked up, dead etc)? What are your thoughts? Btw, I'm genuinely asking. I've become obsessed with this show recently and I haven't been able to talk about it with a lot of people, but I have these questions in my mind. Personally, the more I think about it, the less I know, tbh. It's part of why I love the show and I'm asking, btw. I want to see if I reach some conclusion lol. P.S. I understand if you can't/don't want to answer and I'm sorry this got too long. And if you do answer, feel free to make it long as well if you want, even if you want to make comparisons, add interviews etc. I love reading people's takes hehe. Anywa, thanks!

I don't try to rationalize it tbh. I think that's a goal of the show and the original books as well. What are u supposed to do if u have to "endure" each other forever? What still holds meaning if ur all immortal, how do u have relationships, hobbies, not get bored? Especially when everyone is born from trauma and sometimes that trauma was yesterday and sometimes it was 1000 years ago or 5000 years ago from a society u don't understand at all. How do u bring together so many ppl like that and not erupt on each other?

Trauma and mental illness and whatever else is not always pretty. Violent reactions to things are common and, at least in a society where punitive justice is the norm, we get used to putting these things in these boxes. "u did this bad thing so now ur going to jail / hell." The eternal question of the VC books is where do vampires belong, anyway? Where do they go when they die and for what reasons? Anne Rice never gives a v clear answer on this and it's not just bcuz she wasn't a good writer, the point rly is to just ask the questions. We don't have these answers as humans now, we can't confirm or deny if there's an afterlife and whether these things we do matter for a "soul" or not. We create social rules for many reasons but even those are not actually built on the back of "justice" the way ppl are made to think they are.

I don't think these stories are asking u to find a true "good" or "bad" character or characters. I think we're just meant to watch their choices and reflect on them, reflect on our reactions to them. The fandom's desire for Louis to have done something to "deserve" the drop is all about racism and nothing else. They blame Claudia for "manipulating" Louis into killing Lestat bcuz a black girl is never allowed to be a victim either. She's not even a girl to them anyway, adultification of black girls is another angle they use all the time ("she doesn't look 14 to me!"). They'll say look what Louis did to goad Lestat into fighting him more but they'll never say look what Lestat did to hurt Claudia and push her to that point, as someone who was acting as her parent for most of their lives together. That's always "ooc Lestat." What's happening on screen is a rorschach test for us as the audience and as individuals.

Like I wrote, I don't believe in punitive justice, so I don't think long term these stories are going to focus on that much. The trial was a sham to begin with and Lestat was never "rly" dead or meant to be gone forever. They're going to hurt each other and isolate each other in different ways, but if the show wants to focus on any real character growth, it needs to focus on ways the characters can learn to understand each other instead of banishing / killing each other. Relationships take real work like this too. Anne Rice could never write any of this but I'm hoping the show does. Seeing Lestat have awareness of the pain he caused Louis and the reasons he did it fr was a step in the direction I was hoping the show would go. The big question *is* how does a relationship recover from that? For immortals? How will it make others feel too, particularly Armand, if Louis and Lestat get back together? Will Armand reflect on his own abuse too? They all have a lot in common and they all want to be loved. If that's brought out into the open and treated with kindness and understanding, then the desire to maim and kill each other will greatly diminish tbh. Everything these vampires do to each other originates from a place of personal pain, feeling unlovable. "love is a monster" is one of the taglines for a reason.