#'thats why we call it charlie work'

[silverview]

[larrythefloridaman]

fankids are funny. anyway her name is Present

[animeshotsh]

Thats MY kid | Dad!Lucifer x Kid!Reader x "Uncle"Alastor |

Summary: Alastor wants to take you out for some time with him!

Warnings: SFW | Probably OOC | Uncle!Alastor | Slight!YandereAlastor | Cursing | Canon violence | Canon hell |

Alastor tried to convince himself he was doing this to piss Lucifer off. No, he did not have any type of attachment to you, he did not see you as his own kid (even if you totally ignored his half request to be called dad when not being around Lucifer). And no, he was not hurt by that.

Right?

Yeah well no. You had touched his heart somehow and now Alastor was down bad, he swears you must have some type of demonic magic (and not just you being you and being amazing) because no one (only his mother) made him feel so much love in his life or after life.

"Uncle?" Your voice called him making Alastor look at you with his signature simile. "Why was dad angry when you showed up?"

~☆~☆~☆~

Earlier that day.

"ABSOLUTLY NO. GET OUT FROM MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW" Lucifer screamed at the radio Demon who just stared back.

"My my, I never had you for the possesive type of dad, with how much freedom you have give Charlie"

"Dont bring my daugther into this" Lucifer said almost breaking a pen. "We both know you want to take (Y/N) out just to get to me. And im not letting you create fake hopes for that kid. That kid is mine Alastor, maybe not by blood but its mine. And I promised I would protect them, for anything and anyone. You can piss me off however you want but dont bring (Y/N) into this".

Well fuck, Lucifer did care for you.

Also, fuck you Lucifer. You did not know how he felt (hell, not even Alastor knew how he felt towards you). After meeting you at the hotel, seeing you interact with the others and also play with his shadows, something started to form inside the old killer. And it got worse when you ran to him asking him how the radio worked, his insides making flips as he explained you.

He also did almost break when you were saying goodbye and hugged his legs. If that was any other Demon they would have ended dead on the spot. But it was you, and it felt right.

"Listen" Alastor started smile still on his face but his tone serious "Im not that low to bring (Y/N) into our....fights. You May not believe me but I care for that kid, if I did not for sure I would not have give him one of my shadows to protect them"

"Wait-you did what-"

"The point is" Alastor interrumped static forming "I dont plan on giving they fake hope, and thats all I Will say"

Silence passed for seconds that felt like hours, finally Lucifer nodded.

"Alright, i will let you take them for today, BUT anything and I mean anything happens to them, you will no longer be here" Lucifer said his tone for once being truly the one from a king of hell.

Alastor just nodded, taking his cane being ready to be out with you for the day.

"Oh and Alastor, I dont trust you. But i want (Y/N) to get here what they missed in life, so dont fuck this up"

~☆~☆~☆~

"Nothing your silly head must worry about!" Alastor assured you. However your face did show you were not buying what he said.

"Smile my Dear!! You know you are never fully dressed without one!!" Alastor tried again, stopping to take your hand and make you spin. Your laught coming out quickly making him relax.

"There it is!" He exclaimed then continue to walk besides you. Right now you two were in the cannibals town. For other demons and sinners this part was even more dangerous than the regular hell. But for Alastor it was like his home, demos in here knew him and liked him, and that extended to you as well. A few had waved and smiled, fresh blood showing. But Alastor had made sure you did not see any dead body, or parts of one.

"Now I have a suprise for you!, I have a friend who owns a restaurant and she accepted to take us in"

"...as food or clients?" You asked joking making the radio Demon smirk, radio laughts in the background.

"Well, since she is my friend, we are clients of coruse" Alastor responded getting a nod from you. "Of course you wont be eating anything...special, regular food I promise"

~☆~☆~☆~

When you two entered the restaurant you found it to be empy....aside from some workers who came quickly to guide Alastor and you to a private room with a big table.

There, on one of the chairs a very pale Demon with deep black eyes stood. Noticing Alastor she got on her feet coming closer.

"Alastor, its so good to see you again" she beamed at the radio Demon stopping a few inches away.

"And who may this little creature be?"

Jokes, Rosie knew who you were. He had to listen to Alastor talk about how unfair it was that you had decided to call Lucifer dad and not him.

Being by Alastor side gave you confidence so you took some small steps closer to her.

"Im (Y/N), im Alastor newphew" You stated proudly making Rosie smile showing her sharp teet.

"Thats wonderfull, now please sit I have prepared the best for both of you" Rosie exclaimed calling over the workers who appear to help the three of you settle down.

"For you my friend, I got you the finist meat from this side of hell" A plate with fresh flesh was presented making Alastor almost growl at it. "And for you little one a bird told me you loved chocolate" a big space on the table was now occupied with the biggest and most extravagant chocolate cake you have ever seen.

"I-its that all for me?" You asked not believing it. Getting a nodd from Rosie "and I cant eat all of it?" Again a nodd.

You almost cried when the first slice was put in front of you. No one ever got you cake in the living world.

"Oh and to help you not chocke with that, Alastor I have some.." Rosie paused looking for the right words seeing how you were now devouring the cake "a very special drink" she finally said, a bottle with red liquid appear. And for you, I prepared a mix of appel juice and strawberry" she said getting the most pure look from you.

"Thank you Miss"

"Oh, just call me Rosie" she responded.

~☆~☆~☆~

Turns out you ate most of the cake and now the sugar had gave you too much energy. Rosie had asked her workers to play with you some game of tag, without biting.

And hell, you were fast. Outrunning the old demons and even letting chairs fall to prevent them from coming closer.

Rosie used this moment to dig as much information about you from Alastor as she could find.

"So, Lucifer just decided to take them in? What a strange guy" she said sipping her own drink. "And now you are taking care of them?"

Alastor nodded "yes, you must see Lucifer's face when I show up and (Y/N) calls me uncle, he its so angry"

"But you truly care for them" Rosie stated. "You would never have asked me to prepare something that does not come from sinners or demons knowing where you are. You also made me order the town to keep the body display low to protect them"

Rosie could read Alastor as an Open book.

"Uncleeeee" your call alerted the overlords, seeing you running towards them with the biggest smile on your face. "The other said they are too tired to keep running after me, does this mean I won?"

"Well centraly!! I knew no one would be able to catch you. You are my relative after all"

You nodded and smiled going back to your chair to drink more juice. "This is amazing. Thanks a lot Mi-Rosie!"

"Aww, arent you the cutest" Rosie beamed her hands squishing your cheecks.

~☆~☆~☆

After the food and some more talking Alastor decided it was time for you to go back with Lucifer (and no, it was not because he had got at least 666 messages from him).

Rosie had told you to come whenever you wanted that no one would hurt you in her town.

~☆~☆~☆

"I had a great time Uncle!" You told Alastor as the big castle started to show in the distance.

"Well im glad Dear! Dont forget to tune the radio for my program tonight" Alastor said petting your head.

"I wont! Dad hates it but I love it, specially that music you use...ummmm jazz?"

Alastor started to think that just kindapp you and made you his kid instead would be for the best.

"(y/n)!!" A very distinct voice screamed

"DAD!!"

But he would not want to hurt your feelings so, seeing you from time to time would have to do.

He waited for the exchange to end, Lucifer asking you what have you done and also making sure you were not hurt. After that he nodded to himself.

"Alright, now go inside, Xin has prepared you a bath"

You nodded but turned towards Alastor going for his legs again to hug him.

"Thank you uncle!! No one ever took me to a restaurant or got me cake. Lets meet again soon" you smiled up to him showing pointy teet.

Before he could respond you were running inside the castle with a very worried maid behind you.

~☆~☆~☆~

"Well..looks like you did not ruin this" Lucifer stated seeing you run off.

"I told you I would not" Alastor responded offended. "(Y/N) has potential to grow up to be a powerfull sinner (no you did not) of course im going to look over them"

Lucifer just shoot Alastor a knowing smile then turned around to enter his home.

"Thanks for not breaking his heart" he finally said then the doors closed behind him leaving Alastor alone.

Of course he could not bring himself to do that, even if he wanted to. You were his newphew. His. Not someone else.

And no one breaks the things he loves.

Not even himself.

[t0rturedangel]

How about the Hazbin hotel gang with seraphim child reader who just somehow appeared after ep 8

╭ . . . 𝚊𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚌 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚙𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚎 ੭

𝐇𝐀𝐙𝐁𝐈𝐍 𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐋 𝐂𝐀𝐒𝐓 �� 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 ⿻  𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦??

⌦ 𝒲𝒜𝑅𝒩𝐼𝒩𝒢𝒮 ﹕angel dust - swearing, just him being him. Alastor - ill intent, possible swearing. Mentions of killing, mentions of blood. Nifty - she tries to kill you, dw you dont die. this too me so long im gonna cry

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ okay, firstly just know that the crew goes fucking crazy- I mean they just fought an entire army of exorcist angels and killed Adam, the first man Adam!! So they all think that you're sort of there to try and punish them all for it, so they all get ready to attack (even though you're LITERALLY a child, children are wild though)

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ that's until Charlie, bless her heart, recognizes you (and depending on if you tried to defend her in court just like Emily) and rushes up to you, holding her arms out happily- thats until Angel Dust surprisingly tries to stop her

"It's you!" Charlie gasped, her eyes widening in a pleasant surprise, you were the third and youngest seraphim and much like your older sister Emily felt the need to defend Charlie and her idea of redemption- the thought of allowing those who suffered to see the error of their ways and correct them and then given their reward of eternal peace sounded brilliant, much like Emily you were horrified to learn of the exterminations. You were the first one to openly agree to what Charlie had said despite Adam's comments and facial expressions, you also helped Emily in trying to make the court see what was wrong with this method, unfortunately your plans did not work, though Charlie remembered your efforts and clearly she enjoys your presence. At the glee in her tone, you smiled and stepped forward, wanting to give a hug to the princess of hell though paused in confusion when someone looking oddly like a spider stopped her.

"Woah there toots!" the spider called out to his friend, grabbing her arm to halt her movement- Angel dust was staring both you and Charlie down- a look of uncertainty and distrust painted all over his face "Why ya going to rando angels? what if they were sent down here to finish the job for Adam?", Angel did have a point- you appeared put of no where and was just standing outside the hotel? pretty suspicious.. though Charlie is quick to cool things down "Oh no no no! They're alright, they're a friend! They mean no harm at all- in fact [name] was one of the angels who supported my idea!" she turned to you joyfully, smiling from ear to ear "We can trust them!" ... "okay but how did they end up here? in uh hell?" Husk piped up, his voice full of boredom- or annoyance (you can never really tell with husk, what an odd man) "Oh I fell! ... or rather- I threw myself out of heaven" you happily answered the question, giving everyone a quick second to process what the actual fuck you just said.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ thats how you joined the hotel! Pretty nice innit??

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐄

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Charlie adores you! you're such a sweet little thing, you're a sweetie and are just so kind to everyone!! (at least that's what she likes to think)

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ she thinks of you as a little small sibling!, after all you're the youngest of the team and act just like her, plus she always wanted a little sibling so you're perfect!

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ any ideas she thinks of or any redemption exorcises she runs them by you- to see if they can be more or less effective to get her friends into heaven

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Since Charlie could only stay in heaven for so long, she loves to ask you about heaven and how it was like- always being so invested in your stories, she honestly cannot get enough of them!

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ also, Charlie is... painfully aware that she can never get into heaven, ever. Afterall, she's not only a hell-born but also literally the heir to the throne of hell so yeah there is no chance for her redemption, something she cannot handle- she cries knowing this but now that she has you- someone who ran from heaven, actively choosing to leave and come here gives her comfort. Now she'll never be alone, she has you and you have her!

𝐋𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐑

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ At first, Lucifer was startled and untrusting of you- you're a seraphim, someone that was just like him and could possibly actually take him down despite you being an actual child.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ over time, the king of hell did grow warmer to you, after all he sees a bit of himself in you. Both ex-angels, both hate heaven.... it's like you're his second little one!

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Sometimes, when lucifer isnt busy with his actual child, he hangout with you- entertaining you with his magic while you return the favor with little stories and things, sometimes you even create little gifts like flowers for him.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Lucifer vows to keep you safe, even though you can easily take down hundreds of sinners and even overlords, it's paternal instincts what can i say?

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ this man totally makes you ducks- he has enough experience in making ducks so you know own a few dozen in your hotel room- how lovely!!

𝐀𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ oh this man, this radio demon. He's out for your soul, absolutely hell-driven to get it, and it's all for power (who could have guessed)

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ He doesnt like kids, in fact he can confirm that he absolutely HATES children though he will act all kind and lovely to you- remember though it's all an act! don't fall for it, he just wants your soul (if he gets your soul, your angelic soul? fuck- he'll be even more powerful than before, having an angel's soul would make him practically invincible!)

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ This guy, funny fella really. HE CANNOT BUGGER OFF. Whenever you need help with anything he's the first to appear and offer a helping hand- and then in return as a favor back asks for a deal- is he serious? (yes. he always is)

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Alastor though also, much like everyone else becomes a a bit soft for you- occasionally creating those little weird shadow creatures to play with you, since everyone around you are adults and are busy it's a way of keeping you entertained when they're busy

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ He, also, understands that you are more powerful than him- and knows that if he gets on your nerves enough he'll probably become dust.

𝐍𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐘

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ at first, Nifty only had one goal: to kill you (hey don't blame her! Charlie told her to stab and she's still under that impression)

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ good for you though!! coz you fly up right as she even tries to stab her dagger through your chest- Charlie and Vaggie immediately grabbing nifty to stop her from moving and killing you.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ after the whole misunderstanding, Nifty actually enjoys begin with you! you're clean, and help kill bugs (well really it's you pointing the bugs out to Nifty and her killing them)

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ You're, unsurprisingly, taller than Nif so she likes to climb up on you and sit on your shoulders or stand on your back while holding onto your shoulders. She finds you the most comfortable to climb- plus she can hide in your wings and be used as a secret weapon.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ she adores playing with roaches with you- while you are grossed out by it slightly, you still play to entertain Nifty (then after you sanitize your whole body about ten times)

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 𝐃𝐔𝐒𝐓

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ angel tends to avoid you, not out of hate or spite or anything- it's just.... well he is aware of how he is and well he doesnt want to ruin you in the sense of his dirty talk and swearing.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ though occasionally he finds himself stuck looking after you, which is.... fun.... no i mean really its fun as fuck!!! Angel makes all sorts of jokes, offers you alcohol (you did almost take it if it werent for husk and practically everyone else to all collectively pry the bottle of vodka out of your hands)

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ angel dust also teaches you some very creative swear words! so now, whenever you feel like talking you run around screaming weird insults at people, Alastor has heard you shout "EAT ASS AND DIE HORSE FACE FUCK BITCH!!" a few times to random sinners

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ The... star, is actually proud of teaching you those words- hey if you wanna stay in hell you gotta act like it!

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ hides you away from Val- though somehow you still find out about him, and when you learnt how he treated your spider-friend.. uhm, the studio was in smithereens and val was close to death- now permanently loosing his right arm (just his right arm for now)

𝐇𝐔𝐒𝐊

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ to you, Husk is like the weird- drunk uncle who just got out of prison. Though, he's the cool drunk uncle.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Husk doesnt really speak to you, which is brilliant coz you dont really speak- so the two of you communicate through looks and gestures, leaving everyone in the hotel watching you two 'talk' very confused.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ never gives you alcohol, no matter how much you ask with 'cherries on top' and if he does catch you with any intoxicating drinks he snatches them off of you- scolds you a bit then drinks the beverage himself.... hypocrite

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Husk helps you avoid Alastor, he doesnt want to see you being under his clutches, you dont deserve that you're just a kid.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ He also teaches you how to do magic tricks just incase you ever want to become a magician... and sometimes he teaches you how to play card games- or how to gamble

𝐕𝐀𝐆𝐆𝐈𝐄

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ In all honestly, Vaggie is very much threatened by you- because like, do i even need to say it?? YOU'RE A SERAPHIM !!!!!

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Buttt as long as Charlie is okay with you and you don't pull any stunts to try and sabotage the team you're alright! Just dont try anything.... please

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ she accidently treats you like a soldier sometimes- a habit from her exorcist days, speaking of you could immediately tell she was one of those angels and while you did not like her at first you grew to like her- viewing her as a second older sister

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ you and Vaggie sometimes sit and remember old times in heaven- and you'd ask about the exterminations, though quickly stopped after noting her discomfort.

⿻ㅤㅤᱺ Vaggies also likes to try and swap weapons with you- to see if she and you can handle other weapons (unsurprisingly you both adapt quite quickly)

[speakofthedebbie]

@manicali still inspiring me to chase my dreams so have some hazbin hotel incorrect quotes i made a while ago + four actually new ones (dividers cuz the last one hurt my eyes lol)

---

alastor: overall, id say that experience was a net positive! vaggie: YOU KILLED AN ENTIRE BLOODLINE! alastor: net positive

kill em with kindness saga

charlie: if you kill someone with anything, kill em with kindness! angel: instructions unclear, i killed them with a tommy gun named kindness

---

vaggie: alastor, why the fuck is there a dead sinner at our dining table?!? alastor: first of all, how dare you assume it was me- vaggie: literally who else would it be. alastor: -second of all, charlie told us the other day to "kill em with kindness" so i baked them a pie alastor: it was poisoned

---

alastor: i toe the line between confidence and arrogance every day lucifer: i thought we all agreed that you are like. firmly on the arrogance side

--- (i altered the next one but you wouldnt know that)

alastor: you roughhouse with a guy one time and suddenly youre in timeout vaggie: alastor, you tried to kill him. and he was a guest alastor: key word being tried. hes still kicking, so i think i shouldnt be in trouble vaggie: do you know how many fucked up people would be walking the streets if that was how the world worked? alastor: i know. im one of them

---

alastor: i only kill people who kinda deserved it vaggie: then whats with the dead sinner at your feet? alastor: he was saying something about women belonging in the kitchen vaggie: vaggie: ...fair

---

charlie: al, what are you doing? alastor: stress release! charlie: ...youre stabbing a very life-like doll of my dad alastor: as i said, stress release!

---(the hotel needs a therapist frfr)

lucifer: who doesnt have a bit of existential dread in the morning? charlie: ...everyone??? husk: thats not normal? alastor: damn it angel: fuck! vaggie: oof niffty: *maniacal laughter in the corner* charlie: should i call someone???

---(charlie please get everyone a therapist trust exercises arent enough)

charlie: and what do we do when we feel overwhelmed? angel: drugs! alastor: go on a murder spree! niffty: a roach murder spree! lucifer: self-isolate for millennia! husk: drink until i forget what feelings are vaggie: irrationally hate on everyone! charlie: no!

---(luci the typa guy to talk to his cat frfr. maybe he actually understands her idk) [these next ones are actually new. yeah i had a bit of a backlog]

lucifer: hmm.. what about you, keekee? keekee: meow lucifer: my thoughts exactly

---

lucifer: pancakes are the best breakfast food! alastor: id beg to differ lucifer: Then beg.

---

lucifer: shower thoughts in the rain are still shower thoughts. if you think about it alastor: why am i in love with you again lucifer: i ask myself that question everyday :)

---

alastor: what can i say, i aim to please lucifer: you have never said a nice thing to me in your life alastor: i love you :) lucifer: you have said one nice thing to me in your life

oki bye

[sky-marbles]

There are not enough fanfics about Carmilla and Vaggie and their “this is not my kid but she’s now my kid” dynamic. I desperately want more of them together😭😭

Also I know it’s seems like I’m not very experienced in writing fanfic, thats cause I’m not!! This might be the first or second fanfic I’ve ever written and I still haven’t gotten out of that “blank says” thing😔 maybe one day I’ll get better but I’m very aware my writing is not the best but the storyline itself is what matters to me so fuck it imma post it. Lmk if you guys like this and share your thoughts!

After the hotel is rebuilt the overlords call for a meeting. Alastor is getting ready to head out for it when-

“Hey alastor are you coming or what?!” Vaggie called from the lobby.

“Afraid I won’t be able to fulfill any requests until after my meeting today my dear!” Alastor replies as he descends the stairs.

“Well I’m requesting that we can be on time for this meeting, so let’s go” Vaggie says.

Alastor pauses mid stride. “Excuse me? What do you mean ‘we’?” he asks with a bit of confusion.

“I’m going with you” Vaggie says like it’s obvious. Before he can interject Vaggie informs him the she’s been invited to the meeting as well by showing him the familiar envelope. “It seems that you have, well let’s go then” Alastor relents. They make the walk there rather quietly, while Vaggie is not preferred company she is not someone he dreads having to spend time with either.

After taking the elevator ride up Alastor takes his usual seat, instead of sitting by him or standing beside him, Vaggie actually walks over to Carmilla and greets her with a handshake. Once everyone arrives Carmilla starts the meeting, interestingly Vaggie stands beside her, off to the side a bit.

“Now the-“

“Why Carmilla I wasn’t aware you had a third daughter!” Carmilla starts but is interrupted by Rosie.

“A third..? Oh!” Carmilla realizes what Rosie means.

“Oh I’m not-“ Vaggie tries to correct but before she can Alastor intervenes

“Oh Rosie dear, Vaggie is not a Carmine! She’s that lovely angel that Princess Charlie is dating!”

“Oh! So you’re the ex-exorcist girlfriend huh? Well it’s a pleasure to finally meet you!” Rosie stands to curtsy.

“Oh um it’s nice to meet you too??” Vaggie says uncomfortably.

“Wait a second! YOU are an exorcist?!” Velvet asks in shock.

“I was an exorcist, now I am the Hazbin hotel’s manager. Now we’re here to discu-“

Vaggie is then cut off by Velvet.

“Hold on a fucking minute! An exorcist is not only working but dating the princess of hell, and you (points at Rosie) knew about it!!! Who else was aware that an exorcist is in the same room as us?!” Velvet asks accusingly.

“Enough! Alastor, Rosie, and I were aware of Vaggie’s previous status as an exorcist. However, she no longer serves heaven and has since pledged her loyalty to the princess and her people. So let’s finally discuss the actual matter at hand!” Carmilla finishes impatiently.

“Um I think not! How do we know she isn’t some spy for the dickwads upstairs? Not to mention the fact she’s probably killed thousands of us! Why are we even letting her brea-“

“SILENCIO” Carmilla cuts Velvet off. “Vaggie has proven to the princess, to Alastor, and to me that she can be trusted and has the princess’s best interests at heart. She is a formidable alley and source of information so it would be smart not to cause her any harm especially if you wish to avoid the wrath of the princess… and myself.” Carmilla closes off any further discussion. Velvet backs off but glares daggers at Vaggie, Vaggie ignores her in favor of giving Carmilla a grateful look. Clara and Odette smile knowingly, they are very aware of how much their mother cares for Vaggie. They themselves have even taken quite the liking to her. To the point where they will swing by the hotel while on their delivery routes just to say hi and get any updates on the how things are going.

Carmilla finally gets the meeting to continue and the overlords discuss what heavens next move might be.

“So what should we do if they attack again?” One overlord queried.

“I think we could provide a few hundred sacrifices to placate heavens bloodlust?” Another suggested.

“No.” “No.” Carmilla and Vaggie answered simultaneously. “Are you sure she’s not your daughter Carmilla? She must be related to you in some way” Rosie asked good naturedly. Carmilla sighs then says “I’m sure Rosie” while Clara and Odette chuckle to themselves.

“I think we should… test potential weapons on the exorcist in order to expand our arsenal” Velvet suggests.

“Velvet there is no need to-“ Carmilla is then cut off by Velvet again. “No need? I think what we don’t fuckin need is some delusional princess trying to ‘redeem’ sinners when all it’s done is gotten us a bunch of dead cannibals. At least it got rid of that useless snake fucker”

“THATS IT!” Vaggie shouts. She pulls out her spear and is only able to get one leg onto the table until she is lifted into the air.

Carmilla is holding her by the collar of her shirt (like how you would hold a kitten by the skin of their neck).

“Stand down Vaggie. She’s just trying to provoke you” Carmilla orders. Vaggie relents and lowers her weapon. “If I release you will you try to attack her again?” Vaggie crosses her arms and looks away in defiance. “Vaggie.” Carmilla says sternly.

“Ugh yes whatever” Vaggie says in annoyance. Carmilla puts Vaggie down and proceeds to wrap up the meeting.

“Ready to head home my dear!” Alastor calls towards Vaggie. “The farther away from Velvet the better” she answers.

“A moment Vaggie?” Carmilla asks. Vaggie nods and motions to Alastor that she’ll catch up with him.

Vaggie stands before Carmilla with her back straight and arms planted at her sides, very reminiscent of a soldier.

“Vaggie, I just want you to be aware that Velvet should not be taken lightly, the Vees too for that matter. Promise me you won’t get involved with them unless it’s unavoidable” Carmilla says with a bit of concern in her voice.

“She was being a bitch this whole meeting I couldn’t just-“ Vaggie started but was stopped by Carmilla “I know Velvet can be… frustrating. But she’s manipulative, and is unfortunately clever. She’s more trouble than she’s worth.”

“Then why stop me?!” Vaggie questions in frustration.

“She wanted to show the others that you were a threat! Additionally, it would give her an excuse to fight back and potentially take your life!” Carmilla shouted back.

“You think she’d be able to put me in the ground?!” Vaggie is now mad and hurt by the doubt Carmilla has in her.

“I don’t want you to get hurt Vaggie!” Carmilla retorts. She realizes what she has just admitted and wants to back pedal, wants to retract her words but… doesn’t. She can’t. She has grown rather fond of Vaggie and would hate to see her get hurt especially if it’s avoidable.

“Do you mean that?” Vaggie says voice entirely monotone. Before she can think Carmilla answers “Yes.” Suddenly, there are two arms wrapped around her, looking down, she sees Vaggie hugging her waist. Carmilla dawns a light smile and returns the hug and says “Puede que no seas mi hija pero te amo como tal.” (You may not be my daughter but I love you like one)

Vaggie tightens her embrace upon hearing those words and says “I- Muchas gracias Carmilla.”

They both back up and Carmilla fondly smiles at Vaggie. “Now, what are you going to do?” Carmilla asks with a smirk.

*sighs* “I’m not going to get involved with any of the Vees unless it is necessary” Vaggie answers. “Muy bien.”

Vaggie then gets an idea and asks nervously “I know you are pretty busy but if you ever have some free time maybe you could teach me some more fighting techniques? So if I ever do get involved with the Vees, you wouldn’t have to worry as much.”

Carmilla pretended to think about it but already knew her answer, “Hmmm I suppose that would be for the best. Besides, if you manage to take out any of the Vees you’d be doing Hell an invaluable service.” Vaggie pumps her fist in excitement.

“However, I want to make one thing clear.”

Vaggie freezes at the serious tone Carmilla uses.

“You are welcome to the Carmine residence any time” she says in the gentlest voice. Vaggie smiles gratefully and bids her a goodbye before suddenly turning back to give her one last hug, “Adios” Vaggie utters then darting out the door before Carmilla can say anything else. She merely chuckles to herself and waves at her departing figure.

“There you are! I was beginning to think Carmilla was having you sign some adoption papers with how long you were taking” Alastor says as they make their way towards the hotel.

“Relax your radio waves, I was just discussing some uh hotel stuff with Carmilla” Vaggie tried to play it cool, and was failing.

“Hmmm I’m sure” Alastor replied obviously not buying it.

BOOM that’s the end! I have no clue how to end this so welp it’s over :P

[modelbus]

YOOOO MODDLEE

yeah I did it again.

(Help I have a problem of disappearing into thin air)

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR PART THREE OF CUT CHAOS SHEBSJNSUH

you said you would write 500 chapters.. but like obviously exaggerating..? (Kiddinggg)

tho a few more couldn’t hurt..

juuuust saying if you ever feel like it I will eventually see it and it will eventually make my week. <3333

BUT THATS NOT WHY WE ARE HERE! (I’m sorry my requests are always so long and dramatic bro I just brain like that)

Actual request:

ok so like I knowww cut chaos started from rumours but like rumours are an easy way to start plot lines k? (Also I use she pronouns out of habit but they is pog too)

the friends in question: Tommyinnit (duh), Wilbur (moosic boi), Ranboo (generation loss trauma guy), Possibly Slimecicle?? I know he’s not someone you do requests for normally buttt if you’re okay with it that would be POG, or if slime is a no, tubbo!

SO a few months ago Y/N started working on an SMP with some minimal custom mods, some fancy texture packs, maybe some data packs, and its like this BIGGG project, BUT its not public and its taking a lot of her time, so she can only really do a few streams and most of the time because her schedule is so full its hard to work out streams with friends so, she is alone. with the internet being the internet people started to think something was up, some annoyed viewers made a few rumours and people kept making things up and escalating things until people were saying she did all sorts of horrible things to “lose all her friends” but one of the most popular theories was that she was emotionally abusing them (??? Internet wildin ig) she ignored them while mostly finishing the stuff for the smp, but decided to address it in a very- y/n way. Getting four friends to come to her house and hide slightly off camera while she made a purposefully bad apology video only for them to jump out at the end and her to stand up and be like “YALL REALLY THOUGHT I WAS SOME MASTER MANIPULATOR?! I’M JUST A FUNKY LITTLE CHAOTIC MINECRAFT GOBLIN N’ I’VE BEEN WORKING ON AN SMP THIS WHOLE TIME!! ITS GONNA BE SUPER COOL AND THESE FOUR PLUS ALOOOOT MORE PEOPLE ARE GONNA BE THERE I’M POSTING THE CREATORS SOON AND ITS LAUNCHING IN A MONTH!, SO STOP ASSUMING I’M A BAD PERSON AND GET PUMPED BITCHES!” something along those lines, maybe at the end a little peek at what people are responding with. (Obviously no pressure, but like id be cool) (thanks for considering deity of the busses and models.)

HOW WE LIKING THE SILLIES?!?

P.S I’m not always an angst gremlin (just most of the time..) - ✨🌌🌙 Annon

I DO BE LIKING THE SILLIES (and thank you for elevating me to the level of deity, my ego has been inflated)

Pairing: Cc! Wilbur, Tommy, Ranboo, Charlie Slimecicle x Gn!Reader (platonic)

Roaring Rumors

Life was all about sacrifices.

Or, that’s what you keep telling yourself when you’re up at 1AM working on your server. Putting together an SMP is harder than it sounds; texture packs, data packs, comparability, world-building, even the (seemingly) simply act of contacting people to play on it. For the amount of time you spent on your computer, your hands might as well be part of your keyboard.

Sleep wasn’t the only thing you sacrificed. Streaming, even just fun ones with your friends, had quickly became rare. Although you loved to hop on a call while coding still, your online presence had severely receded.

You just keep telling yourself that sacrifices are necessary. That the payoff would be worth it.

And it really would be, but you just had to get there first. Which was proving harder than you had thought.

At the very least, you still had your friends. Wilbur sitting silently on call with you while you work, Tommy dragging you out of your room, Ranboo always willing to get excited over your progress. Every day you woke up with a text from your groupchat—typically Charlie—just filling you in on the latest internet trend by a meme.

Today, your news comes from Wilbur and Tommy.

“I think they’re canceling you.” Wilbur says casually while you’re in the midst of detailing the hunger bar for a texture pack.

“Ooh, you’re a wrong’un!” Tommy yells in the background of Wilbur’s side of the call.

The three of you had been idly chatting while each doing your own thing. Wilbur and Tommy were engaged in some Twitter competition, as far as you know.

“Canceling me for what?” You ask, deciding to ignore Tommy’s shouting.

“Existing, I think.” Wilbur answers.

“So the normal.”

“The normal.”

Although the conversation stops there, you can’t help yourself. Later, during one of the few hours you dedicate to getting sleep to stay alive, you pull open Twitter on your phone. Your last tweet was nearly two weeks ago, so it’s been a minute.

But you just want to make sure nothing horrible happened while you were busy. You’re a content creator, this is normal. Definitely. You definitely aren’t just justifying this so you can do it.

You swipe through tweets, heading to trending and searching your name. Tweets load, making your mouth run dry. Wilbur wasn’t joking.

All you can do is scroll, reading as the messages get wilder and wilder. From people saying they were missing you to theories on why nobody was streaming you. Each one seemed considerably more implausible, and before you know it you’re glaring at your screen like it’s to fault.

Some thought you had grown apart.

Some thought you had a falling out.

And, apparently, a lot thought you were emotionally abusing them. Or, depending on the tweet, manipulating them.

Quite honestly, you didn’t even know how they got the idea. The long threads of explanations did nothing but send you into a spiral, biting your bottom lip so hard that it bleeds.

You were so close to finishing the SMP. It needed just a few things, then you'd be able to start scheduling to get it up and running. You didn't have the time nor mental capacity to deal with whatever the fuck is going on right now.

Is it a good choice? Maybe not. But do you still ignore the accusations? Hell yes.

-

By the time you get even closer to finishing the preparations for your SMP, you've come up with the perfect plan to address the (quite stupid) rumors. It'll be a two-in-one; you address the rumors and announce the SMP at the same time.

"How long do I have to lay on this floor?" Tommy asks, stretched out behind your chair.

"Nobody asked you to lay on the floor." Wilbur points out, standing next to your computer. Charlie, on the other side, laughs.

"Yeah man, you wanted to be down there."

"Besides, I'm doing great down here!" Ranboo chimes in.

You roll your eyes, grinning. "I'm about to start stream, so it won't be for much longer. Just wait for my cue, yeah?"

Tommy grumbles, but shuts up. You take that as your chance to start the stream, switching it off your waiting screen and waving to the camera. Your chosen stream title has brought in a bit more than your usual casual steam view number, "Talking about some serious stuff," leading people to believe there will be drama. And if it's drama they want, it's drama you'll give.

"Hello, hello!" You smile, leaning back. "So I've decided to talk about some things. Namely, the Twitter shit. I am so sorry for everything, and I mean that. A lot. Sincerely. There's meaning in it."

Tommy snorts, and from the corner of your eye you catch Wilbur kick him to shut him up.

"What am I sorry about?" You ask rhetorically, acting like you read it off of chat. "Oh, you know. People have been saying all types of stuff. The things about me manipulating my friends?" There's a pause while you let that sink in. "So, I'm sorry."

It's a purposefully shitty apology, but you sigh and act like its heartfelt for a few moments, nodding towards chat. Their messages are mostly confused, especially because it isn't one emote-only.

"Sorry you guys are so gullible!" You shout, and Tommy practically tackles you.

Wilbur's the one to fix your chair, Ranboo and Charlie appearing next to you within moments.

"You guys really thought this one could manipulate me? The master?" Charlie asks the stream, pointing at you.

"Yeah!" Tommy shouts, way too energetic for someone who complained five minutes ago about being on the floor. "We're the master manipulators! Get fooled!"

"I, for one, haven't manipulated anyone-" Ranboo starts, but Tommy slaps a hand over his mouth and nods empathetically.

"Yeah, I don't know what you guys were thinking, but I've just been playing fucking Minecraft for the past few months nonstop." You laugh.

"Nonstop. It's a problem." Wilbur nods.

"It is not a problem!" Pause. "Anyways, I made an SMP! And that's where I've been! Not because I've been manipulating my friends or some shit, stop being dumbasses."

"It'll be super cool!" Ranboo adds in helpfully.

"These four-"

"That's us!" Charlie points around at himself, Wilbur, Tommy, and Ranboo.

"-will be on it, plus a lot more. It'll be posting those people soon! As in, check your Twitter obsessively guys! The SMP will be in about a month, too, so get fucking excited! I want to see some hype!"

"WOO!" Tommy screams, making everyone cringe at having their eardrums ruptured.

"So that's all I wanted to talk about I think. Anything to add, guys?" You glance around at the four surrounding you with a grin.

"One thing." Charlie nods, leaning in really close. "I have a secret. This SMP, it's actually-" He hits your end stream button mid-sentence. "And that's how you keep 'em interested."

-

Ycgmaenthusist NEW SMP NEW SMP NEW SMP NEW SMP

Mammalianeighingreflecenthusiest We are dumb as fuck aren’t we

Poabsenthusiest i will RIOT IN THE STREETS if any of yall be mean to MY STREAMER -> Cmwylenthusist FR I GOT TWO FISTS AND A CAUSE

[malevolententity]

Staring at you with my big eyes

(I know nothing about vtm aside from the suckening but it really interests me and I'd love to hear about about edward and the vampire micro politics)

HELLO!!!!!!! THANK YOU FOR ASKING!!! WELCOME TO VAMPIRE POLITICS 101 EDWARD TWILIGHT IS SO SO FASCINATING TO ME and i have no idea if charlie did any of it on purpose because i dont know if he actually looked that deep into the politics of vtm to plan for any of this.

how do i start this. youre getting an essay. dear lord this is going under a cut. because i gotta explain the normal politics before i can get into why edward politics is so fun for me personally.

everything below comes with a massive banner of context that i have been obsessed with vtm for a literal 13 years. so i have a lot of opinions on how stuff can be explained mechanics and lore wise. that charlie might not agree with and/or might not have been intending the read to be because we are two different storytellers.

SO in world of darkness (the book setting) there are three main political parties. there are the Camarilla which are traditionalists who created the rules of the masquerade and they want kindred society to be united and for there to be a hierarchy. this is the governing body that charlie has implemented and plays around with. then there are Anarchs who obey the general masquerade because they recognize its usefulness but they do not believe in a true hierarchy and bending the knee to The Prince of a city. and then theres the Sabbat who think the masquerade is stupid and think that kindred should live openly and blatantly rule over humans.

charlies camarilla is so interesting from the get go because queens are not a thing. thats a charlie thing. so were already off to a fun micro politics of what the fuck? hey charlie? is The Queen part of the inner circle and the head of the camarilla of the entire world? and you just invented a title? bro? because why would she as just prince of LA be called queen? female princes are still princes. so i work under the assumption that she is part of the main governing body for the entire world camarilla not just LA. because normal princes live in their cities. if she lives in fucking romania in umber castle shes not just a normal prince.

so within the camarilla theres a bunch of jobs but the main ones charlie plays with is primogen, sheriff, and prince. and he does a decent job at explaining them. primogen are voices of their clan. they are the most powerful person in the clan in a given city and serve to represent the needs of the clan within the camarilla. not every clan gets a primogen as it depends on if theres enough camarilla kindred in that clan to warrant needing a primogen. the sheriff is the front facing enforcer of the rules. who is elected by the primogen and prince together. and then the prince is The Prince. they are like a dictator mayor. they are the one who creates and expands the masquerade rules of the city to make sure that mortals do not become aware of vampires. princes are typically not elected; they come about from coups or if the old one wants to abdicate they endorse/instate a new prince.

theres also keepers, harpys, scourges, seneschals, heralds, archons, and justicars. but explaining those does not help with my why edward is fascinating so i can go into those a different time. also because we only have maybe two examples of those within suckening.

SO IN ANARCHS which charlie never brings up to my memory theres a lot less official titles! you have the Barons which function similarly to a prince but they will kill you if you say that; hate princes with a passion. cities depending on their size will have a number of barons who control neighborhoods/sections of the city. they all work together but compete with each other to maintain their footholds in the city and to resist the princes rule. and then the other main one is Proctors who just keep tabs on whos in the territory and doing what. which can function as mini sheriffs. 

so using LA as an example edward rules over the entire city but unless he killed all the anarchs in the city the specific territory of santa monica has a baron who also imposes rules on the kindred of that specific territory.

and then we have the Sabbat who charlie also never brings up. who also have their own chain of command in cities but also the world at large! the most important titles here for this talk are Bishop and Archbishop. a Bishop is going to be akin to a primogen it is a title that is given to a powerful kindred who then leads a large group of sabbat within a section of the city. bishops answer to archbishops. and an Archbishop is akin to a prince. they are the sabbat ruler of an entire city. every sabbat within that city ultimately answers to them.

a big thing with the Sabbat sect as a whole is they do not care about the masquerade. they commit mass masquerade breaches be it mass turning events or just having them run around in the wild doing whatever not caring if kine see a vampire using their powers or feeding.

Edward Twilight is a serial masquerade breacher. like theres no way around it. like yes he is a toreador so he is going to want and demand the attention of everyone. but theres a line. and one of those lines is mass ghouling an entire city and making a large portion of the mortals in your city look like you. that is an insane massive breach that is going to get the inquisition/grimslayers to raid your city because thats not normal. that is a massive red flag that vampires are there. that is a thing that only sabbat would do.

because even with charlies camarilla being his own spin on it and not 100% by the book. i can not bring myself to accept that a genuine camarilla member would pull the shit edward does. like it does not make sense to me. and thats slightly compounded by the fact that camarilla traditionally; even the toreadors; want to stay hidden. they do not like mortals knowing vampires exist they LOATHE cellphones because cellphones put a camera in everyones pocket and is the easiest way to make the entire world aware of your existence and status as a monster. and then your meet your final death when the city gets raided. camarilla toreadors chase fame and beauty but theres still a line ya know.

a sabbat on the other hand? loves a cellphone. doesn't give a shit if the world is aware of them because being known isnt a threat, its the goal. it is the goal to have humans aware that vampires are real and you can be one or to serve one.

so with all that said. i genuinely believe that Edward Twilight is an Archbishop of the Sabbat who has been playing the longcon with the Camarilla. because he is involved in the camarilla, theres no denying that. he has underlings that are clearly real camarilla and work in camarilla terms and conditions. but all of his goals that we know about just scream sabbat to me. he has been vying  for the prince position trying to get that endorsement from shilo to further legitimize himself and his hold on the city, that is a fact. but the amount and types of breaches he commits are the kind no right minded camarilla would commit and he does not have an affliction that drives him to madness. so to me he comes off as a sabbat agent trying to destabilize the cams.

theres also the factor of viv and vex. traditionally in VTM, clans are predisposed to certain political sects, with special cases made for individual vampires. in lore this is because the different sects will consider entire clans just a walking masquerade breach that they don’t want to deal with. so having them be a part of the sect is rare and special. now every storyteller handles this differently some are rigid by the book and some just do what fits best for the story they want to tell. charlie ran this in v20 and by v20 lore tzimisce are purely sabbat because they are an inherent breach. they are a clan who makes weird meatball creatures and turn themselves into literal flesh monster that barely look human. and in v5 tzimisce as a whole are welcome to anarchs but only individually welcome to camarilla. charlie mixes a bit of v20 and v5 because he read them both and touchstones are a thing so we know he pulled some v5 things. but with the shit viv and vex do i just find it hard to believe theyre genuine cam who respect the masquerade. those are edwards fellow weird little sabbat guys who are helping him destabilize and take over. they made edward sexy. they are the ones performing the procedures to turn ghouls and bloodbonded vampires alike into edward clones. that is the most sabbat ass shit ive ever heard of besides mass turning events and weird meatball snuff films

edward twilight is fascinating to me regardless of if m right. because knowing charlie and his love of bits and “well wouldn’t that be silly” it is likely that edward to him is just a genuine camarilla toreador primogen who climbed the ladder and his version of the camarilla are a little more lax in some regards. or because of the bloodbonding the other primogen and deacon won’t go against edward and his mass breaches.

but for me it is so much more interesting to think of edward as an archbishop who decided to infiltrate the camarilla god knows how long ago to become a prince and then probably climb up even higher into the Inner Circle because literally too many details line up and point at that being a possibility for me to ignore as coincidence.

because we do know that this campaign was supposed to be about the political climb until they all started playing and charlie realized that the boys ended up being more interested in the relationships and personal mysteries than an actual political power struggle against each other campaign. so i KNOW he had to do some amount of research into the camarilla i just dont know how far into the other sects that research went to have him genuinely on purpose make edward a sabbat.

and i cant wait for season 2 to drop eventually so i can learn if i put in waaaay too much thought into all this because i know too much about this system. or if charlie actually did an insane amount of research on vtm politics and i picked up on clues that are genuinely there LOL

i really hope this made sense and you enjoyed it! it’s like 4 pages long and if theres anything in here that needs clarifying i will gladly talk even more or explain other things within vtm because this is my favorite system and i do Not know how to be normal about it :D 

[flower-boi16]

Who would you say is the most poorly written character in Hazbin Hotel, and why?

Well looking at my top 5 best and worst characters in both Hazbin AND Helluva I’d say…Charlie. I’ve already made a full post about why Charlie isn’t a particularly great protagonist so I won’t go and repeat myself here.

But my biggest issue with Charlie is that…she never grows. She doesn’t really learn anything, and she stays the same from episode 1 to episode 8. She doesn’t have much of an arc…at all.

And, just to add on something I eventually realized after watching a video about Charlie that made pretty interesting points; Charlie does display many character flaws throughout the show, being naive, emotionally immature, and not really understanding how people work.

These are interesting character flaws for Charlie but something I realized while watching the video was that, although Charlie has character flaws…she never grows from them. At all. Her flaws are shown but they are never confronted or called out. She never grows into becoming more understanding of others or realizing that her views on redemption are heavily flawed…nothing.

And it gets worse when the show HEAVILY idealizes Charlie’s views on redemption, always her as purely right and anyone who opposes her is automatically in the wrong (something I talked about in my post about Charlie).

And THATS what I think is the fatal flaw with Charlie as a character; she’s always portrayed as in the right, that her views of redemption that everyone can be redeemed is purely correct in spite of it being just as heavily flawed and simplistic as Adam’s “no one can be redeemed” mentality. Not only does it fly in the face of the show’s themes of being against black and white moralities, it also prevents Charlie from growing as a character because the show is so busy portraying her as completely right that it can’t have her go through a real arc.

Like imagine if Charlie went through an actual arc of realizing that her views of redemption are kinda too idealistic and she grows and matures to being more understanding of other's emotions throughout the show. That would’ve been so interesting! But we didn’t get that, now did we?

The sad part is that pilot Charlie was better than Charlie in the series, purely for the fact that the pilot ACKNOWLEDGED that Charlie’s views on redemption and her understanding of other’s emotions is a bit flawed, and it looked like they were going to confront these flaws in the show…but they didn’t.

I WANTED to love Charlie, I really did, she’s apart of my personal favourite character archetype after all (optimistic bubbly female protagonist) and I’ll admit, she’s slightly endearing at times, but she’s so lacking as a character, ESPECIALLY for the main protagonist.

[desire-mona]

Could I ask for a mini ramble on why Keating is your favourite character? Poised with a notebook and pen to take down notes haha

YES!!!!!!!

BECAUSE NOBODY EVER TALKS ABOUT HIM AND THATS HONESTLY SO RUDE!!!!!!!

so like. keating; let's talk about that

we desperately need to acknowledge that keating is an amazing man right down to his core. he is so passionate about living life in a way that makes him feel fulfilled that he makes it his main goal to teach others how to do the same.

he experienced the same exact thing as the poets, remember, the movie makes a big deal of how nothing at welton changes. he had the same exact oppressive environment growing up as they did, so he knew exactly how to connect to these boys.

HIS INTENTIONS AND ACTIONS WERE NOTHING BUT PURE, AND THATS WHAT MAKES HIS ENDING ALL THE MORE DEVASTATING.

every single one of his peers and superiors fully believed that neil's death was keatings fault, and actively shunned him for it. not a singular person that wasnt a Teenager in his community understood what he was trying to do. welton painted the narrative that keating taught these insane useless lessons about breaking the rules BUT NEED! I! REMIND! YOU! HE MADE A PRETTY BIG EMPHASIS ON THE FACT THAT U GOTTA BE SMART ABT IT! he called out charlie for the call from god thing for a reason!!

another crazy devastating thing abt keating + neils death is the fact that neil was understanding exactly what carpe diem mean's IMMEDIATELY. AND WAS ACTING ON IT!! he pursued things that he knew would make him happy and fulfilled in the long run, he knew what he wanted to do with his life and he took the first opportunity to get it. the exact fucking definition of seizing the day. keating was REACHING THIS KID SO WELL!! HE WAS UNDERSTANDING EXACTLY WHAT HE WAS SAYING!!! AND THEN!!! AND THEN!!!!!!!!!!

so imagine this. you grow up in the most rigid, boring, unchanging environment and decide fuck it, im gonna Do Something for Myself for Once. you start to think oh, this is actually kinda sick, doing things that make me happy. you escape the environment that aims to essentially make these Children into what their idea of successful is. (quick reminder that there are actual children also attending welton. like kids. like 9 year olds n shit.) you actually chase after every opportunity to be what your idea of successful is, and were so passionate about that way of living that you learned how to teach others how to do it. and also poetry and stuff.

so youre doing exactly that, you finally got to a point where youre doing exactly what you wanna do, and teaching these kids in a situation just like yours. and its going SO WELL! there's this one kid who just GETS IT and is doing it flawlessly and then - oh !

and now everyone around you is like um wtf this is your fault actually. SO YOU HAVE TO PROCESS THE FACT THAT YOUR STUDENT IS DEAD ON TOP OF HAVING TO RELIVE THE ENVIRONMENT YOU HATED AND ACTIVELY WORKED AGAINST YOUR ENTIRE LIFE. AND NOW YOU HAVE NO INCOME OR COMMUNITY OR HOME OR FRIENDS. AND THE ONLY PEOPLE THAT KNOW YOU ARENT A MURDERER ARE UNDER THE AGE OF 18. AND YOUR WIFE LIVES IN ANOTHER COUNTRY. OH AND ALSO YOUR RESUME IS RUINED AND ITLL PROBABLY BE PRETTY HARD TO FIND ANOTHER JOB IF YOU CAN AT ALL.

AND YOU HAVE CANCER. HE HAS CANCER IN THE OG SCRIPT.

keating is my personal description of raw devastation. all of who you are and what you wanted to be is in shambles because of something that isnt your fault. but almost everyone around you thinks it is your fault. and we're just gonna move on from that? thats it? thats the end of the story? no more keating after that?????? downright evil. more people gotta talk about this wonderful man!!!!!

also very sorry if this makes no sense, im quite high. but also shameless self promo pls interact with my ask blog @ask-captain-keating bc i lob running it. pleags. ily for asking this btw!!!!

[lucius-morningstar]

Magic Happens?

Charlie goes to tell her dad the good news and learns something that might not be so great. While that happens Lucius decides to share a bit of news with the guys and Cherri. ----- Lucius: Alright drinks are on me, everyone. Drugs are optional but I ain't paying for em. Cherri: Fair enough, what are we celebrating Princey. Lucius: Let's just say this is more of a personal victory for me and I want to celebrate with some fuckers I know won't leave me blitzed out at the bar. Angel: Doesn't it usually take you guys a lot to get drunk. Lucius: My dad yes, mom she can hold her own, Charlie's a light weight and I've got a tolerance but it's hard to stop once I've started. Husk: So you've got a problem. Lucius: Hey Alky, don't judge you're as bad as me. Husk: I'd say worse if you didn't have a little bit of angelic blood to hedge your bets. Lucius: Fair. Angel: So why are you celebrating. Lucius: Been spending some much needed time with Clara and Carmilla didn't actually threaten to maim me this time. Still threatened me with a gun though so small victories. Cherri: That's a victory for you boy that's sad. Lucius: If you knew how often that woman threatened me you'd see it as a victory too. Angel: So Luci boy is settling down finally. Lucius: Do not call me Luci. Anyway, Charlie also suggested that I take you guys out to celebrate not only your hard work and how far you've all come but- Angel: Let me guess for how far her and Vaggie came- Lucius: Gross, don't make those jokes with me. Anyway I figured since we're celebrating, I'd bring you guys a treat. Husk: Oh yea and what's that? Lucius: I stopped by the Gluttony district and got my hands on some of bees good shit. Alcohol not drugs, Charlie told me that I was not to give you guys any drugs but never mentioned I couldn't encourage the alcohol and Bee's stuff hits you hard, it gives most hellborn a buzz so it should hit you sinners like a truck. So we'll do shots. Angel: Ooh nice, kinda got that golden angel blood ichor doesn't it. Lucius: I feel like it's intentional I nicknamed it heavenly honey though. Husky: Oddly accurate, this shit is sweet too. Lucius: She enjoys the sugar honestly, if you all end up wanting to go off and fuck around thats fine just make sure you're back at the hotel by morning or early afternoon. Deal? Husk, Angel & Cherri: Deal! * Lucius: Ugh.. Good fuckin hell.. Clara: Well it was indeed a good fuck in hell. Not that I can remember much. Lucius: Geez fuck- Wh-When did I get here. Clara: You snuck in last night smart one. Just be thankful my mom didn't hear. She would not have been amused by this. Lucius: Right right.. Eh she'll get over it. Did I bring that stuff here too? Clara: Yea and you insisted I'd try it. I'd be mad if it wasn't so good. Lucius: Bee makes good booze. Ugh, what time is it. Clara: A bit later then I'd like. So my mom might know you we're here. She's usually banging on my door if I'm not up past eleven. So it's almost one. Lucius: Shit.. I told Charlie I'd be back at the hotel before lunch. Clara: You mentioned that, then put your phone on do not disturb which shocked the fuck out of me. Lucius: Well I did more then shock the fuck out of you clearly. Clara: *Snorts* Yeah, you better get going though before my mom comes in here with her gun. Lucius: Yep, see you tomorrow though, right? Clara: You will. See ya Lucius. Lucius: Bye Gorgeous. *Quickly portals out of the room.* Clara: Ugh.. Mama is going to kill me, but it was worth it. * Lucius: Hey Charlie, sorry I seen you left me a lot of voice mails, not like yo-.. Woah what's with the face. Charlie: I uh-.. Found out something from dad and well I have to tell everyone together we we're just waiting on you. Lucius: Is it bad? Charlie: Well it's not good. Lucius: The baby okay? Charlie: Yeah but that's not about my baby exactly. Lucius: What do you mean? Charlie: Well...

[lovrbooy]

okay its time for me to REALLY get into what is so special about charden to me….

we have seen in the show like numerous times that dennis has a very manipulative grasp on each member of the group EXCEPT for charlie… like in the gang makes paddys great again everyone is hearing insults and insecurities from the doll but charlie just hears him making funny jokes . sure he “sleeps” with the waitress but charlie doesnt even seem to Like being in a relationship with the waitress (which is a whole can of worms that i dont want to get into cuz it makes me mad). all the others in the gang are faced with dennis feeding (and sometimes creating) their insecurities, but for charlie he just has to face that he thinks dennis is hotter than him. i dont know if this is making much sense, its 3 am but this swishes around in my mind a lot. i really feel like charlie is just Too fucking Autistic for Dennis’ usual manipulation to work. on top of that, dennis doesnt really put on as much of a performance in front of charlie because he doesnt feel like he needs to impress him like he does with everyone else. charlie already thinks dennis is cool and he also thinks dennis is annoying and stupid, and having been friends since highschool dennis has learned theres just nothing he can use to try and change that. im sure there was a time where this idea really fucked with dennis and made him mad, but as we see it in the show i think a way that dennis tries to grasp on his need for “control” in his relationship with charlie is just trying to take care of him. obviously he would never call it that, hed never even think of it as that. but dennis has charlies back and understands him a lot more than other people do considering he spent so long analyzing him and building a profile on him to try and find his insecurities. i think dennis just pretends charlie is like a dog he has and thats why he finds himself being nice.

because of that dynamic between them it just makes the idea of a relationship really interesting. i also think it would lead to the most Hijinks which is incredibly important to factor in … imagine a sitcom love triangle where charlie loves the waitress, the waitress loves dennis, and dennis loves charlie. there are so many funny scenarios that could come from that just Open your Mind to Imagination and maybe fanfiction

does the charden nation understand what im trying to say

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Tell me more about your feelings on Hazbin Hotel.

Part of me doesn’t want to answer this question, because of how popular this show is on Tumblr.

And I know that people will be like.

“What do you know, you’re a Christian, of Course you’d have some problems with it.”

Yes, I am going to disclose that. I am a Christian. Not ashamed of that. Still working to be a better one. But I can be objective enough to view it as a writer, and that at most my personal bias will only be a slight enhancement of my view.

And these are my unfiltered thoughts on this show.

But for my opinion of Hazbin hotel. The original Pilot was interesting. A place trying to reform sinners in the last place people would think to be reformed. (Spoilers ahead)

That pilot premise is interesting. You see Hell as a cesspool of the absolute worse people. (Like Los Angeles but with more cannibalism) and it takes the “Hell is other people approach”

The songs were fine, the animation was great, and the characters introduced were intriguing. So much potential depth to them, theories can speculate. And of course the big question of. “Can someone in hell actually be redeemed?” And we even have a character pointing out “of course not, they’re in hell. Their chance was before this?”

It raised this question of, if you know your doomed, why try to be a good person? And That is fascinating.

Then the show finally airs. And it’s just another “Heaven is corrupt” storyline. And it’s not even done well.

(The whole retelling of creation made my eyes roll. Trying to make Lucifer to be the good guy? How original (sarcasm). And not even done well. Because it’s Charlie narrating this, which makes it be like Charlie knows all this and is doing all of this pointlessly)

Hells gonna rise up against it and all that. The hotel was basically pointless.

The show goes on to constantly contradict itself at numerous points that leaves me more confused.

Yes there is an interesting character (Alastor) but outside of a great soundtrack and animation… the writing of the show is a mess.

It feels both rushed and too slow. The characters are speedrunning their arcs, yet the plot is crawling.

Let’s then not forget the fact that Angel power and weapons are said to be the only thing that Perma kills sinners and angels. Yet sir pretentious dies and instead of permadead, goes to heaven? What fucking logic is that?

Also it says how only Angel weapons and powers can hurt angels (they make a whole point about it) only to show Vaggie and Lute have a whole ass fight hurting eachother with tables and s***. Unless they’ve been blessed them chairs…

Also where do the souls that perma die go? Detroit? Because if Sir pretentious can go to heaven after dying, what the deal with all this? Is Hell actually hell? Seems more like purgatory.

And then you include the helluva boss lore as they take place in the same universe. And MORE questions get added.

But that’s a can of worms for another time.

More importantly, Charlie, the main character hardly gets any development moments. Her issues are TOLD not showed.

Vaggie is also a mess too, like her whole thing is protecting Charlie, and helping her. But then she gets told that she has to fight For Love and that’s how to win? You mean what she’s BEEN DOING THE WHOLE TIME?!

All the stuff with Angel Dust, the writing for that is fine when showing the messed up situation he’s in, but then after the Song “Loser, Baby” he’s suddenly months sober? Speedrunning a bit too much.

Side note: HOW DOES HEAVEN NOT KNOW HOW PEOPLE GET INTO HEAVEN?!

Like they genuinely seem like they don’t know? From my understanding, there is no Big Man making all the calls. Thats not corruption. Thats incompetence.

So if it’s just angels in charge, THEY should know. Like show that they’re tilting the scale or maybe denying certain people that DO follow the criteria. Because with the incompetency of it, it basically leaves the door open for potentially EVERYONE to get into heaven.

Yet then the show shows how awful people in hell are, like it’s clear there are people that deserve hell. Maybe I’m overthinking it, maybe I’m not thinking about it enough. But it’s a really dumb system.

But the biggest glaring hole in this show is the fact that there is no point for heaven to actually do the purge in the first place.

Hell being overpopulated shouldn’t matter. Only Angel power and weapons can actually hurt angels. Why would they worry about an uprising. Heaven could easily wipe hell. The only people that could probably do damage is Lucifer and the leaders of the rings of hell. And even then… That’s like 7 against ALL OF HEAVEN!? Even if we assume overlords and some high level demons could do similar… Heaven still takes it. (But then again the Lute and Vaggie fight might contradict that. Hard to say it’s so confusing)

That all aside, is it an awful show? No. It’s just so riddled with plotholes and pacing issues.

Would I recommend this show to people? No.

Would I recommend the sound track? Probably, the songs are catchy. Can’t deny that.

Everyone has their own opinions and tastes, but the show has too much of a mess for me.

[camp-queer-and-there]

lucille my old hag can you hit that

THIS SHIT LACED😭 im forreal a freak just lmk👀👅 ohio skibidi toilet oi oi oi😏 maxdesignpro WHAT!? HELP ME! HELP = 👍 fetus sebastian hes so ugly i cant would you rather have 1 million dollars or CANCER! art is lowkey so amazingly beautiful...gigachad sigma LET HIMM COOK!🗣️🗣️ uwu >_< anyone got anyone spongebob x reader👀 only in eastern latvia💀 ohio final boss grimace shake charlie the steak ishowspeed kai cenat the amazing digital circus pomni garten of banban caseoh gyatt super mogger looksmaxxing based and redpilled diabolical lick😈erm what the sigma oh! thats not!- getting my top surgery done at claires POV: youre ben shapiros mom and hes convincing to let him get gta5 i feel like calling you a slur.. what type of gay are you, since you dont have it in your bio... the european mind cannot comprehend this drew phillips: hello im drew phillips the ahh magic i finna be in the pit on cap. 123°!? gurrrll we are not thanksgiving turkeys😂and thats on period fahrenheit lankybox elisocray INSANE UNBOXING! gegagedigedagedago we can go gyatt for gyatt fuck that we can go rizz for rizz 19 bucks for the fortnite card double pump with the fanum tax THE BIG APPLE! drake vs kendrick beef p diddy dr disrespect annoying orange if garlic was a person my name is drake and im here to say.. kendrick lamar your disses arent okay! diss me diss me now you gotta kiss me quandale dingle mf doom dookie baby girl my pookie wubbleshmubble kins whats hurts more than being yelled at be skinned alive probably pov: i am your cashier during february (and i notice you are black) you look like tyler the creator if he was in my dreams ray william johnson sybrian dancing lady oh when the saints go marching in oh when the saints go marching in todoroki gives birth alone jumbo josh is lost in the zumb sauce lightskin touch the moon bozo cant im walking my fish why are frogs so stupid show me your griddy show me your griddy.... show me your... DOHHH THATS ONE WAY TO HIT THE GRIDDY. THATS ONE WAY TO HIT THE GRIDDY grwm to go to bath and body works temu workers getting ready to clock in day in the life of a twitch streamer your final challenge.. let yo bih go through your phone!... AH HELL NAW YO ASS TWEAKIN JIGSAW quavo stop thats the gayest shit ever amoeba sisters angst preppycon 2024 kart ride into spongebob youve been here before.. a weirdcore dreamcore kidcore clowncore playlist. my talking tom her body tea is insane😭 my aura is unmatched DO NOT PLAY CREEPY BATH GAME AT 3AM!!!!!!!! *THIS IS WHY* ALMOST DROWNED school isnt done but i am💀 omg u did call me baby.. maybe ..omg did he call her baby.. maybe.. im not okay..... bark for me. pov family dinner😭💀why u so pissed ...what me when i get mustard for christmas yall when i put on my dad fit "FREAKYbob" I AINT ANSWERING!! HELPP IM DEADDDD wait no im not maya winky boyfriend takes you out to eat but his opps slide on him [boyfriend asmr] mrbeast might ne TOO BIG to he cancelled squid games i hope someone dies and goes to hell today me staring at the sephora employee in the eye as i "sample" a $800 perfume cats when you cover their cage with a blanket blud thinks hes the main character💀 omg a rare gyatt sighting ninja fortnite sneako the ocky way new yorkian vermontian how 10 yr old me felt after putting "i dont speak tags" in an argument holy fricking smokes dude.. my cut is insane... shout out to my barber dawg! bro thinks hes the thinker waterless baked water what i would wear to my isis execution why did my dog just punch me😓 #STOPBULLYING💯

i mean.. i kind of ocd😁 you mean OBESity stop doing the golden freddy pose youre scaring the kids when a client wants to trauma dump first session when i dont have enough diamonds on episode so now i gotta shit in the school hallway in front of my crush phone and youtube video lobster activity someone shot trump in the ear he wouldnt have missed goku drip well my mother always said the best flowers get picked first dudes been waiting for his mcflurry since 1786 ladies ladies one at a time please😍 rio de janeiro the oppblock hazbin hotel boy rejoice creepy autism simulator my scary silent hill whos ivan mac n cheeks freak island home sweet home.. blud always looking at sum😭😭😭when face id acting up so you gotta LOCK IN fuck im washed WAIT IM GOATED why the mob isnt a fucking aesthetic: a thread this where the magic happens👅 style griddy👀

what

- ⌛

[catwyk]

silt versing now heres my immediate thoughts

"rejoice! the authorities are on their way" love the blending of the mundane and divine i eat it up every single time

faulkner so silly messing up his scary evil sermon thank god for this sibling rane realness

"I, high prophet faulkner, chosen by the trawlerman- I-I was responsible for the return of the withermark? and the revelations at bellweathers you might have heard. that it was the linger straits but thats untrue thats all been debunked" hes so cringefail i love him

him talking about being unbound from his duty....... someone introduce him to atheism QUICK

i need to make alpha male podcaster faulkner fanart

THE OPENING CREDITS 😭😭 THEIR LAUGHS😭😭 IM GOING TO THROW UP I LOVE THEM SO MUCH THIS IS THE HAPPIEST WE'VE EVER SEEN FAULKNER

"he does not, in truth, care about the people who took him in and gave him a home" sending greve a mail bomb rq hold on

"he will die as he lived. alone" SENDING 5 MILLION MAIL BOMBS

b narr ripping out my heart. again

my god faulkner really will not let up on building his own mythology. he is so desperate to be somebody

🔥RANE LORE🔥

FAULKNER DAD AND BROTHER APPEARANCES EX FUCKING SCUSE ME?????????????

did they ever find out about charlie. who is we eddie. do they know about faulkner's insane life right now. how long has faulkner even been away at this point

stopppppp eddie calling faulkner richie is so cute 💔💔 jon naming faulkner richard just to avoid the three brothers having -ie names and it happening organically anyway

his dad calling faulkner charlie. oh.

the fucking serials faulkner and his dad are watching?? hello??? silly as hell

i was right when i said sibling rane's family came from the faith hell yes vindication

"its not blasphemy if the high prophet does it" eyebrow raise

faulkners desperation with these prayer marks is breaking my heart. theyre so not gonna work

not missing the parallels between faulkner and paige begging and threatening their gods for protection. very interesting

faulkner standing off against uncle just is the most intense scene ive experienced in so long

this heart to heart is KILLINGGGG ME. faulkner is just a little boy oh my god and his dad is only acting in his interest NOW when its too late..... someone hold me

"every god's a god of death. it's the only thing we need them for" COME BACK COME BACK COME BACK C

NO FAULKNER TRYING TO FOLLOW CHARLIE??????? this is NOT ok im gonna cry poor blorbo

dear lord this episode hurt me so badly. why are the voice actors so damn good. why are the characters so well written. i love them so much and i rlly like the direction faulkner is going in, i feel less like hes doomed to die by the trawlerman

[eternalera]

Some problems i had with the finale in hazbin hotel

now before i start i just wanna say that i absolutely love and adore this show with all of my heart but with that being said i can still recognize its flaws and god does it have some

🌟

lets get one of the most obvious things out of the way first. charlie did literally nothing. she hit adam once or twice and he beat the shti out of her which was just a dumb excuse to have lucifer show up nad beat the shit out of him.

but more on that later. charlie is the main character and she only gets the motivation to go full 'god mode' when sir pentious dies? even then she didnt do anything. dazzle ends up dying but oh well its fine (or razzle i cant remember). she stabs adam once and even then he beats her up more than anything. hes powerful yes but charlie couldve put up more of a fight

she even has a song in episode 7 about taking charge but honestly... she doesnt really do that. actually sir pentious had a better arc than her and we hardly see him throughout the entire show

🌟

sir pentious' death was fine we see him gearing up and it was kinda leading onto the big scene where he would take on adam but...

bro got obliterated in less than like a second and then adam made a joke off of it. tbh at this moment i started laughing so hard because goddamn was it hilarious but then you have charlie and the hotel mourning it like not even five seconds after- like half a second after the joke.

the tonal whiplash of that scene was just... ugh-

like i didnt care about it being serious because guess what? im already laughing at the joke like everything that i cared for about him just thrown into the gutter because guess what? haha funny :)

but for that to be what makes charlie go into her full form still makes me mad- ugh

🌟

adams death was fine. he was killed by nifty so like- okay i guess. honestly i didnt really care for it. it was funny but then ONCE AGAIN you have lute cry over him and actually i cared more for that than nifty-

but its just like- nifty?

dont get me wrong its funny asf but... nifty? they treated both of what was meant to be serious deaths in this show as a goddamn joke and expect me to not call them out on it? like okay nifty shes a funny character but her killing adam just made me go though 3 different stages in the span of like- five seconds

bro just got stabbed wait what-

omg its nifty thats kinda funny

actually i dont really care for nifty so wtf-

like huh?

the death just kinda felt like... nothing to me. like i get thats its funny misogynistic asshole gets stabbed by crazy straight small bug woman. but i didnt really care for it. nfitys fine but i dont care about her enough for me to laugh out loud at this moment

🌟

lucifer's entrance was horrible. bro can open portals, he knew what they were doing, he knew what was coming yet he comes in like- halfway through the fight only when charlie's getting hurt

all im sayin is that if he was in it at the start the final episode wouldve been like half the amount of time it actually was...

oh yeah and pentious would be alive, but no they needed him to die to show that the hotel works so why not just hold him off.

im sorry but lucifer stole all of charlies glamour in this scene like charlie was getting choked after hitting adam once and then boom. daddy to the rescue ig

like are you kidding me? at least make it fucking vaggie or smth. not lucifer and why was he late? we've pretty much established that man doesnt do shit so like-

its fucking pointless it a quick and pretty damn cheesy ending. if he wasnt there at the start we dont need him at the end. or at least have him arrive earlier not at a convenient ass time

🌟

going back to the fact that NOT A SINGLE DEATH WAS TAKEN SERIOUSLY.

i know that sir pentious was coming back so its fine to make it a joke but like adam? bro thats your main villain right there. a show is only as good as its villain and honestly his death just wasnt satisfying (as i mentioned before)

like seriously wtf?

🌟

this all being said though i really enjoyed this show with my whole heart and i do love it and some of the things that it did. the fact that this show even got out is a goddamn miracle <3