#'k so for us to rob the ship we first need to know where the ship is'

[whentheynameyoujoy]

Not Black Sails casually reminding me why I love heist stuff. Because the good heist will spend forever detailing the smallest, obvious shit that needs to be pulled off for the big plan to have the slightest chance of success, and then showing every single item on that itinerary going wrong in ways not one of the many damaged assholes on the team foresaw.

[hongism]

mists of celeste ➻ 18.5

➻ pairing: ??? x fem reader ➻ genre: space au, pirate au, space pirate!ateez, angst, eventual smut ➻ Word Count: 3.2k ➻ Rating: M ➻ Warnings: language, violence, guns and weaponry, blood, future warnings tba ➻ summary: Sneaking aboard the ship of a renowned space pirate may not have been the best idea, but you’ll have to make do with what fate has handed to you

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act two ➻ part 8.5

​​​

Jongho doesn’t need to be told what’s going on. He senses it before Yeosang even comes to the door, feels Yeosang’s presence outside the door, the heat of his emotions, and the slight panic that courses through his veins. He doesn’t need to be told that Mingi is having an episode because he can feel it. Which is why when Yeosang goes to knock on the door, Jongho opens it a breath too soon, and Yeosang nearly topples forward and trips over the air. Jongho doesn’t need to reach out and catch him – Yeosang stays on his two feet just fine – but he does regardless, rough hands hitting the much smaller man square in the chest to keep him from falling forward. He doesn’t need to ask, yet he does.

“Mingi?”

“Mess hall.”

“Okay. Did he hurt anyone?” Jongho has the questions memorized. No matter how many times he says them, the answers rarely change, and he knows Yeosang well enough to pick up on the emotional cues. That’s how he knows Wooyoung is fine before Yeosang even opens his mouth to tell him so.

“No, I got Wooyoung out of there before he could.”

“Hongjoong?”

“Tried already.”

“Yunho?”

“Couldn’t help.”

“Ah,” Jongho exhales, even though he already knew the answers to those questions before asking them. He’s the last resort. He always is. Hongjoong demands priority – he needs to feel useful somehow, but it always backfires and hurts him in the end. Then comes Yunho, the ever desperate healer, the arrogance that drives him to believe that he can fix everything and everyone – including Mingi. The reality, however harsh and cruel it may be, is that none of them are Jongho. None of them understand Mingi the way he does. None of them are Berserkers. It’s just a simple fact, but one that they can’t seem to wrap their minds around, which is why Jongho is always the last resort.

He pushes past Yeosang to step into the corridor. His steps are hurried but not frantic; there is no panic or worry in his bones as he walks towards the mess hall. It’s routine almost. Perhaps someone else might feel bitterness or some sort of resentment towards this system they have. Not Jongho though. He bears no hatred or thinly veiled anger about the arrangement they carry out. Part of him feels the tuggings of responsibility when he looks at Mingi. When he looks at Mingi and sees… something. Something different, something painful, something raw and broken.

When Mingi first joined the crew, the others all expected Jongho to understand him. To read him like a book and take him apart with ease. He hadn’t been able to do that at any point in time. Because he and Mingi are not the same, never have been and never will be. Jongho was raised by a loving mother and father. A mother who was a Berserker just like him, who took care of him and looked after him without any hesitation. Taught him everything there was to know about what it meant to be a Berserker. Mingi, on the other hand, was not given that luxury. His father never loved him; he loved money. Power. Blood. And that’s what Mingi gave him, because it was the only thing he knew.

The mess hall is quiet when he steps inside. Not empty, but quiet. Hongjoong stands at the edge of the room, leaning up against the frame of the entrance with arms crossed over his chest. Disappointment radiates off him in waves, but not directed at anyone except himself. Yunho stands beside him with a similar stance, although he can’t look at Mingi’s curled form. The room is otherwise empty, and that’s probably for the best. And Mingi. Mingi lies on the floor, not near the center but somewhere off to the side between a few tables. He’s on his hands and knees, back curved in a way that is painful to look at, and as Jongho draws nearer, he can see the tremble in his shoulders. He doesn’t think to ask what happened. It wouldn’t be necessary anyway. He barely notices that Yeosang is no longer hot on his heels and following his steps.

“It’s too much of a burden to put on his shoulders.”

Hongjoong doesn’t verbalize the words, but he can feel them regardless. Words that have been muttered and whispered against hot ears when they think Jongho can’t hear them. None spoken with malice or hatred. Just… concern. Worry. Fear.

“He’s so young. Why do we push this onto him?”

Because Jongho understands him. Knows Mingi better than Mingi knows himself. Feels the things he feels, even if they were raised differently and experience it differently. He understands the control, the taut thread keeping Mingi tied to sanity, and how it threatens to snap. And when it wavers and trembles — that is where these episodes find him.

“I’m the captain. I should handle this myself.”

Hongjoong doesn’t understand it. The things that he wishes to understand are things that he can never hope to grasp.

“I’m a healer. A medic. This is my job.”

Yunho fails to realize that it isn’t his responsibility. It is his job, but not his burden to bear. He sees Mingi as something broken, when Mingi isn’t broken at all. Mingi is a bird that never learned to fly, a slave without a master, a boy robbed of his innocence too young. Not broken.

Jongho hesitates near Mingi. The older man doesn’t shift or make any indication of acknowledging him. The emotions are there though, and that’s how Jongho knows that Mingi is fully aware of his lingering presence behind him.

“Mingi,” he starts, tone so soft and quiet that he can barely hear it himself. Ever so slowly, he lets himself squat down beside Mingi’s body. Heat. It radiates off him in waves. Then in the corner, concern from Yunho, the lingering taste of disappointment from Hongjoong, and nothing else. Patience is a challenging game to play, even harder when it comes to Mingi, but necessary. Thus, Jongho waits. Watches the way Mingi’s shoulders tremble from effort, the tethered thread in his mind wavering but never breaking. He’s fighting it so hard. “Mingi, can you hear me?”

“I-I… can’t. Can’t. Need. N-Need it.” His tone is desperate and fragile. Nothing like the cruel and heartless killing monster he seems to be. Mingi brings a hand up to clasp the back of his neck. His nails tear at the skin in attempts to break it and draw blood.

“No, you don’t.” Mingi’s fingers falter. He hesitates. For a moment, his nails cease their warpath on his skin.

“I want to – want to k-kill.” Mingi lifts his chin a little. He doesn’t look up quite yet, and Jongho knows it’s because he can feel the lingering emotions at the other side of the room. He is more afraid of losing control than he should be. The danger is minimal. Mingi won’t kill either of them. Hongjoong knows it, as does Yunho, and Jongho as well. Mingi is the only one who doesn’t trust it.

“You don’t want to, Mingi,” Jongho insists, letting his elbows find purchase on his knees. Jongho gets it on occasion. The sudden urgings that Mingi suffers from – the need to take control over all the emotions hitting him from all sides. It manifests itself differently for every Berserker. For Jongho, it takes the form of guilt. Brings all his wrongdoings to life and places them before his eyes in a way that’s almost tangible. He can never overcome it alone, and that fact almost makes him feel weak. Yunho’s soft hands in his hair, San’s mellifluous voice in his ears, Seonghwa’s mint-like scent that permeates his senses until the hallucinations pass, Hongjoong’s emotions hitting him square in the chest and reminding him that this is real. It isn’t violent. Emotional, yes. Painful for himself and only himself. But for Mingi, it manifests in violence. Anger and every emotion on the spectrum of rage.

Mingi’s fingers draw away from his neck, but he brings the hand down to his other arm a second later. His nails dig deep, he’s desperate to break skin, he’s burning for the red that will flow from his flesh. Jongho can’t let him have it. If he does, then that thin thread of sanity will snap. Years of progress down the drain. A hard reset. He reaches out, hand brushing against Mingi’s shoulder blades.

Mingi jerks at the touch, almost as though he’s been burned. He doesn’t verbally cry out, but Jongho hears the pained cry in his movements and emotions. It hurts every time. A small and nagging sensation that never leaves Jongho alone, one he will think about for hours if not days after this. Mingi cries out for help and support but pushes it away at the same time. Desires help but doesn’t know how to ask for it.

“Mingi,” Jongho exhales as he brings his hand down on the man’s shoulder blades again. Mingi jolts at the touch, hand drawing up but not coming down on Jongho. He prepares himself for a hit and everything, but it never comes. Instead, Mingi brings his closed fist down on his own head, smacks his skull with too much force, an expression of pure anguish on his features. He’s fighting it. Jongho knows that Mingi’s mind is screaming for blood. To close his hands around Jongho’s throat and try to end it. The desire to kill… it’s not Mingi, but rather the Brute of Kebos. The monster his father created. It’s not Mingi. Jongho has to remind himself of that over and over again. It’s the only way he can look Mingi in the eye every day. His tone softens as he speaks. “They’re loud, aren’t they?”

“So loud. S-So loud. Can’t think. C-Cant–” Mingi cuts himself off, unable to finish the thought. Yunho once told Jongho that Mingi didn’t feel emotions. Just didn’t have the proper mind for it, and that he would have to be taught how to handle things. Jongho dared to tell Yunho to his face that he was wrong. Mingi feels emotions. He has them. It isn’t that his brain is wired the wrong way. It’s that he was never taught how to understand them. Mingi doesn’t know how to talk about his feelings because of that. Jongho can read him like a book, feel the heat radiating off him in waves and know what’s going through his head even if he blocks it out. Mingi’s emotions are overwhelming, even with Jongho’s resilience and restraint. All that to say – the pain Mingi is in now is enough to cripple Jongho and bring him fully to the ground. The aura is overwhelming, and for a breath of a moment, Jongho isn’t sure he can do what he’s supposed to do. The face of his mother taunts him at the edge of the room. He responds by closing his fingers around Mingi’s wrist, stopping the hallucination from blossoming as well as stopping Mingi from hitting himself any more.

“It’s okay, Mingi. They can’t hurt you here,” Jongho murmurs even though he knows that isn’t the brunt of the issue. Mingi’s wrist goes slack in his grip. For a second, Jongho thinks that the episode has passed, but then weight slams against him, and pain blooms in his chest. He falls back against one of the metal tables. Metal scrapes against metal, creating a loud and abrasive screech, then the floor disappears out from under Jongho. He doesn’t have time to defend himself. Mingi’s fingers close around his ankle, yanking back harshly until Jongho hits the floor. Pressure hits his chest. Jongho doesn’t even process it at first. Mingi’s knee stabs into his chest and pins him to the floor with little effort. However, Jongho is stronger than Mingi. They both know it. Jongho could flip their positions and have Mingi facedown on the floor in seconds. That isn’t what this is about though.

Progress.

“Mingi!”

Steps forward.

“Stop!”

Steps backward.

Yunho and Hongjoong are shouting, voices getting louder as they move closer, but Jongho manages to bring a hand up to stop them. They have zero reason to listen to him and no incentive either, especially because Mingi has one knee square in the middle of Jongho’s chest, the other pinning his right arm down, and both hands wrapped tight around Jongho’s throat. Perhaps he should be scared of what might happen next. Afraid that Mingi tightens his grip and chokes him to death. Both Yunho and Hongjoong are exuding so much fear and panic that it clogs Jongho’s senses, and if it’s affecting him that badly, then that means that Mingi is having a much worse time with it.

Yet despite having his life dangled before his eyes like this, Jongho isn’t afraid that Mingi might kill him. Maybe he’s psychotic for that, or perhaps he just trusts the fact that Mingi doesn’t want to do this that much. Yes, it has to be the latter. He lets Mingi keep him pinned to the floor, hand still raised in Hongjoong and Yunho’s direction and keeping them warded off for the time being. Mingi’s nails dig into the flesh of his throat.

Pain.

Pain, but not from the small crescents Mingi leaves in his neck.

The pain radiates off Mingi’s shoulders. He’s fighting himself so hard, fighting the instinct to kill, the urge to kill, the need to kill. He’s fighting the other part of himself, the one his father forged in blood and dark arenas. Mingi doesn’t know that he’s feeling pain necessarily; he merely knows that he’s hurting. He knows the strain hurts and burns, makes his skin crawl and itch, makes even breathing become a laborious task. Jongho lets his free hand move towards Mingi – each inch breached is slow and calculated as not to scare the man – and lays it atop the ones clasped over his throat.

“You can’t hurt me, Mingi,” he whispers. Mingi’s resolve flickers. For the briefest moment, he believes Jongho, eyes trailing over his own hands like they don’t belong to him.

“It… it hurts.”

“I know it does. Everything hurts, right? They’re loud in your head, telling you to kill.”

“Blood. They w-want blood.” Mingi’s fingers twitch around his neck. His nails dig a bit deeper, and Jongho feels them breach skin. It isn’t deep enough to draw blood, which is for the best because the second the first drop falls, Mingi will fly into a rampage.

“You don’t have to give it to them, Mingi.”

“They’ll hurt me if I don’t.”

“You’ll hurt me if you do.”

Mingi freezes at his words. His hands loosen a bit but don’t move away from Jongho’s body. It’s the last thing he wants, because as cruel and heartless and merciless as Mingi is, he doesn’t want to hurt Jongho. Doesn’t want to hurt Hongjoong or Yunho. Any of the crew. He wants to protect them; he just doesn’t understand how to do that because of the war that goes on in his mind.

“I… did I not already hurt you?” Mingi inquires, gaze curious as he tilts his head to the side. “Your emotions… they – they feel – I hurt you.”

“You didn’t. Tell me what you feel.”

“I don’t know what I feel!” Mingi argues, a spike of anger shooting out towards Jongho. He can barely choke out his next words thanks to the sudden clench of Mingi’s fingers around his throat.

“What I feel. M-Mingi, tell me – tell me what you feel from me.” He’s pushing hard, and perhaps it’s too much of a burden to put on Mingi’s shoulders like this, but at the same time, it’s not enough. Mingi is caught off-guard long enough for Jongho to gasp several deep breaths of air.

“You’re… warm.”

“Does it hurt?” This is the only way Jongho knows how to communicate with Mingi. He can’t name the emotions off one by one because Mingi wouldn’t understand what any of it means, but he does know how to talk about how he’s feeling without naming anything directly.

“N-No.”

“So, are you hurting me?”

Mingi shakes his head ever so slightly. Denial. This time, he believes it for more than a second. Mingi withdraws his hands from Jongho’s neck, letting him fully breathe again, and Jongho rolls out from under the taller Berserker before he can be pinned once more. He doesn’t move because he fears having his life in Mingi’s hands. He would gladly give his life over to the man time and time again if it meant protecting the others from harm. The storm that swirls in Mingi’s dark red eyes calms for the time being. The waters are peaceful. The voices are quiet. And Mingi… Mingi cries. Not for the first time, and not for the last, but he cries nonetheless, hands trembling as he holds them close to his chest. Behind them, the panic and fear radiating off Hongjoong and Yunho slowly dissipates. It grows calm again.

Jongho draws closer to Mingi, kneeling beside him and pressing a hand again Mingi’s shaking ones. It doesn’t stop the trembling or offer any comfort in the slightest. Jongho doesn’t expect it to. Mingi doesn’t understand comfort, only the need for it. But they’ll just keep trying until they find something that works. Like what Hongjoong does next. The short captain walks towards where Jongho and Mingi are and squats down in front of ashy-haired Berserker.

“You pulled yourself out of it, Mingi,” he says, tone quiet but clear. It carries weight with it, one that Mingi picks up on within an instant.

“I al-almost–”

“But you didn’t. You didn’t kill anyone. Didn’t hurt anyone.” A smile twitches across Hongjoong’s lips, soft and gentle as he gazes down at Mingi’s slumped form. “I’m proud of you.”

The simple four words hold more than should be humanly possible, but Jongho supposes that it makes sense since he and Mingi aren’t wholly human. Mingi’s tears halt only long enough for him to offer an awkward yet grateful smile. Hongjoong eats it right up. He reaches across the gap between him and Mingi, not concerned for a second that Mingi could snap his arm in half at the slightest trigger, and drops his hand to the mop of hair atop his head. A small ruffle of the locks, fingers gently combing over Mingi’s scalp, then pulling away. Jongho wants to imagine that Mingi leaned into the touch, eyes fluttering shut as an overwhelming sense of peace washed over his body.

✧✧✧ a/n: surprise?? this is definitely one that was unexpected for me but i was struck with a sudden realization and plan for mingi’s character progression and how he functions as a character, and this idea wouldn’t leave me alone so i just had to write it and post it today because we’ve got regular chapter tomorrow osidjafoidj but i hope you guys like it!! i think this is the most important interim chapter and has a lot of impact on mingi’s character in the main plot sooo yee lemme know what you think!

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[thelittlesttimelord]

The Littlest Timelord: The New Doctor Chapter 14

TITLE: The Littlest Timelord: The New Doctor Chapter 14 PAIRING: No Pairing RATING: T CHAPTER: 14/? SUMMARY: With the Doctor newly regenerated, he and Elise must now navigate their new relationship. The Doctor is an old man and Elise is a headstrong young woman. She is no longer the scared little girl the Doctor saved all those years ago. Will Clara be able to keep them from killing each other?

Clara was clearly getting ready for another date when Elise and the Doctor arrived.

The Doctor was watching her laundry spinning in the washing machine while Clara checked her makeup.

“The Satanic Nebula,” the Doctor suggested. He stared at her goldfish. “Or the lagoon of lost stars. Or we could go to Brighton. I've got a whole day worked out.”

“Sorry, but as you can see, I've got plans.” Clara gestured to her outfit.

“Have you?”

“Look at me.”

“Yeah, okay.”

“No, no, no. No. Look at me.” Clara flipped her hair.

“Yep, looking.”

“Seriously?”

“I think you look beautiful,” Elise told Clara.

“Thank you, Ellie.”

“Why is your face all colored in? Are you taller?” the Doctor asked.

Clara raised her foot. “Heels.”

“What, do you have to reach a high shelf?”

“Right, got to go. Going to be late.”

“For a shelf?”

“Bye.” Just as Clara was about to leave, the phone in the TARDIS started ringing. “There you go, you've got another playmate.”

“Hardly anyone in the universe has that number.”

“Well, I've got it.”

“Yes, from some woman in a shop. We still don't know who that was.”

“Is that her now?”

“There are very few people that it could be.”

“Maybe it’s Kate,” Elise suggested. It’d been a while since they’d seen the head of UNIT.

The Doctor reached out to answer it.

“Don't,” Clara said.

“Why not?” the Doctor asked.

“Because, if you answer it, something will happen.”

“What?”

“A thing”

“Huh. It's just a phone, Clara. Nothing happens when you answer the phone.” He picked up the receiver.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The next thing they knew they were sitting at table, each holding a memory worm.

Clara and Elise screamed.

“Doctor?” Clara asked.

“Don't touch it.”

“Where are we? How did we get here?”

A man and a woman sat across from them at the table.

The man had half his head shaved with computer chips attached. “Who are you? Sorry, what's going on? I don't understand.”

The woman was dark skinned. Her cheeks transformed into the worm’s horns before fading. “Ah! What is that thing?”

“It's a memory worm,” the Doctor told her.

“What happened to your face?” Clara asked.

“Deletes your memories.”

“Did you see her face?”

“How did I get here?” the woman asked.

“The same way we all did, but we've all forgotten,” the Doctor said.

“And who are you?”

A metal case sat in the middle of the table. It played a recording.

“I am the Doctor, a Time Lord from Gallifrey. I have agreed to this memory wipe of my own free will.”

“I am Clara Oswald, human. I have agreed to this memory wipe of my own free will. Do I really have to touch that worm thing?”

“Yes, you do. And change your shoes. Elise, you’re next.”

Elise heard herself sigh. “Do I really have to do this?”

“Yes.”

“This is a bad idea. Fine. I am Elise Smith, daughter of the Doctor and River Song. I have agreed to this memory wipe of my own free will.”

“Okay, you're next, Psi.”

“I am Psi- augmented human. I have agreed to this memory wipe of my own free will.” Psi took a chip from his head and examined it.

“I am Saibra, mutant human. I have agreed to this memory wipe of my own free will.”

The case unlocked and a golden light shone from within. Two screens popped up. A golden K in a circle was shown on the screen before a hooded figure appeared.

“This is a recorded message. I am the Architect. Your last memory is of receiving a contact from an unknown agency. Me. Everything since has been erased from your minds. Now, pay close attention to this briefing.”

A planet appeared and zoomed in to show a bank. An advertisement started to play as the Architect spoke.

“This is the Bank of Karabraxos, the most secure bank in the galaxy. A fortress for the super-rich. If you can afford your own star system, this is where you keep it. No one sets foot on the planet without protocols. All movement is monitored, all air consumption regulated. DNA is authenticated at every stage. Intruders will be incinerated. Each vault, buried deep in the earth, is accessed by a drop-slot at the planet's surface. It's atomically sealed, an unbreakable lock. The atoms have all been scrambled. Your presence on this planet is unauthorized. A team will have been dispatched to terminate you.”

Someone banged on the door. “This is bank security. Open up.”

The video kept playing. “Your survival depends on following my instructions.”

“Open up and you shall be humanely disposed of.”

“There's another exit,” Saibra said.

“All the information you need is in this case,” the video said.

Psi took a chip from his head and plugged it into the case.

“What are you doing?” the Doctor asked.

“Downloading,” Psi told him.

“Ah. Augmented. Nice.”

“The Bank of Karabraxos is impregnable,” the video said.

The Doctor took a device from the case.

“Please stand away from the door. We do not wish to hurt you before incineration,” the guard ordered.

Elise rolled her eyes. How considerate.

“The Bank of Karabraxos has never been breached. You will rob the Bank of Karabraxos.”

Soon, the five of them were running down a corridor.

“Okay, okay, okay. Stop, stop, stop. Far enough,” the Doctor said, panting.

Can’t handle all the running, old man? Elise asked. She received an eyeroll in response.

“Augmented human. Computer augmented, yes? Mainframe in your head?”

“I'm a gamer. Sorry, who put you in charge?” Psi asked.

“You're a liar. That's a prison code on your neck.”

“I'm a hacker slash bank robber.”

“Good. This is a good day to be a bank robber. Mutant human. What kind of mutant?”

“Like he says, why are you in charge now?” Saibra asked.

“It's my special power. What's yours?”

Saibra sighed and took Clara’s hand. They watched as she transformed into Clara. When she let go, she was herself once again. “I touch living cells, I can replicate the owner.”

“Your face, when we first saw you...”

“I touched the worm.”

“You can replicate their clothes too?”

“I wear a hologram shell.”

“Like Christmas,” Elise said, even though only the Doctor and Clara knew what she was referencing.

The Doctor pulled out the object he took from the case. “Human cells. DNA from a customer, maybe? A disguise to get us in?”

“We're actually going to do it? Rob the bank?”

“I don't think we have a choice. We've already agreed to.”

Saibra sighed and touched her thumb to the object.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Elise had to admit that the bank was beautiful.

“How long can you maintain the image for?” the Doctor asked Saibra.

“For as long as I like.”

They entered the bank.

“Question one. Robbing banks is easy if you've got a TARDIS. So why am I not using it?” the Doctor asked.

“Question two, where is the TARDIS?” Clara countered.

“Okay, that probably should be question one.”

“Hopefully it’s not having a temper tantrum this time,” Elise said.

The Doctor turned to her. “At least we’re not stuck on a pirate ship with a murderous mermaid.”

An alarm started going off and security grills came down around all the exits. “Banking floor locking down.”

“They know we're here,” Saibra said.

“Banking floor locking down.”

A woman entered with two men dressed in suits. They walked up to a man with a briefcase.

A monster wearing an orange jumpsuit and a straight jacket entered. It had two eyestalks and was led by two armed guards.

Elise, instead of being scared, just felt sorry for the poor creature.

“What is that?” Saibra asked.

“I don't know. Hate not knowing,” the Doctor said.

“Excuse me, sir. I regret to say that your guilt has been detected,” the woman said.

“What? That, that's totally ridiculous,” the man said.

“Is it, sir? Well then, we will certainly double-check. The Teller will now scan your thoughts for any criminal intent. Good luck, sir.”

The man put down his briefcase.

“Interesting,” the Doctor said.

“What is?” Psi asked.

“The latest thing in sniffer dogs. Telepathic. It hunts guilt.”

The creature emitted a high-pitched noise that caused the man to grab his head in pain.

“What about our guilt?” Clara asked.

“Currently being drowned out,” the Doctor told her.

“What's he doing?”

“If he has a plan, he's trying not to think of it.”

“Ever tried not thinking about something?” Psi asked.

“No,” Clara said.

“You may have to,” Saibra said.

The creature roared.

“Ah, criminal intent detected. How naughty. What was your plan? Counterfeit currency in your briefcase, perhaps?” the woman asked.

“No, not at all. For God's sake,” the man said.

“It doesn't really matter, we'll establish the details later. The Teller is never wrong when it comes to guilt. Your account will now be deleted, and obviously your mind. Suppertime.”

The armored guards held onto the creature’s chains as it moved closer to the customer. It’s eyestalks came together and a ray was focused on the man’s head.

“It's wiping his mind. Turning his brain into soup,” the Doctor explained.

Elise felt tears well up in her eyes.

“Your next of kin will be informed, and incarcerated, as further inducement to honest financial transactions,” the woman said.

The man started screaming.

“We've got to help him,” Clara said.

“He's gone already. It's over,” the Doctor told her.

“He's in agony, look at him.”

“Those aren't tears, Clara. That's soup.”

The creature pulled it’s eyestalks apart.

The man stopped screaming and one of the suited men caught him. The front of his head was caved in.

“Account closed. Take him away. He's ready for his close-up. Apologies for the disturbance. Everyone have a lovely day.”

Elise was right. This was a very bad idea.

[whyqueerbaitingisbad]

movies & shows

cracks knuckles* alright this is going to be more of a rant than an analysis because i’m basing this on both my research, but also how it felt to personally be baited by these shows. there are obviously more pieces of bad (almost every horror movie) and good ones but these are the ones i’ve watched.

please keep in mind that i am but one queer and everyone has different opinions.

Supernatural (CW) 2005

This show is 15 years old and just ended. From season 5 till 15, there has been tension between two of the lead characters. They were constantly shipped together and not only did the entire fandom know about this ship but so did almost all of Tumblr. On top of that, the actors and show runners knew about it as well. Which is why it makes it ridiculous that it was constantly pushed aside while the romantic coding  kept happening, even after show runners dismissed it as being intentional. The Destiel (Dean x Cas) case has been going on for years, and as the show came to its end, many fans had hope. But N O P E. Instead, we got a love confession from Cas where Dean looked like he was near constipated and the Cas was killed and sent into a fiery place that was not hell but s u p e r  h e l l.

… w hy.

Sherlock (BBC) 2010

Just like Supernatural, this show was renown on Tumblr for not only how good it was, but its hinting at a potential relationship between Sherlock Holmes and John Watson. But again, like Supernatural, the intentional tension between the two characters was denied by producers. This caused an uproar within the fandom, and even left some people believing that, after the last season aired, it had been a joke and the producers were hiding a “secret, unaired season” because they had felt so robbed by this show that had implied something and denied it.

The 100 (CW) 2014

We got lesbians. We got background gays. We were happy. Then, all of a sudden, one of them is killed for no reason. Did it advance the plot? No. Was she fighting and died in battle? lol no. She was doing literally nothing and got shot and died. And then the producers kept bringing her back once a season in the form of a ghost or illusion because why? Because she was a fan favourite queer character. ✨bury your gays and sparingly bring them back for profit anyone?✨

Voltron: Legendary Defender (Netflix) 2016

*deep breathe* This one is a special disaster. Not only was there romantic tension and romantically coded scenes for 7 seasons, but producers, voice actors and artists working on the show repeatedly said “don’t worry klance (Keith x Lance) shippers, you’ll be happy”

. … w h e r e??? You code one of their scenes with a sunset in the background while they talk about love and then one of them goes on a date with someone who has declined his advances for 7 seasons but now in season 8 decides to do a full 180. Not only that, but you announce at a Comic Con (a convention) that a character is gay and has a fiancé, only to kill off the fiancé and never make it explicit in the show except at the last second of the last episode where he marries a no name character. 

Personally, i’d like to say a big fuck you to the show that strung me along for 2 years and never stopped saying we’d be happy to then pull the rug out from under us and call us crazy for thinking anything from the past 8 seasons was intentional.

Scooby-Doo (2002) 

While not being outwardly queerbaiting, this movie’s filmmaker has just revealed some shocking news, which wasn’t at all shocking to the gays who had watched this movie over the years. In July of 2020, James Gunn, the filmmaker of Scooby-Doo, revealed in a podcast that, initially, Velma was explicitly gay in his script, but then the studio watered it down until it became nothing. This isn’t an example of baiting as much as it is changing a character’s initial design to “better fit an audience”. The worst part of all this is that with Velma’s character having been written with a l i t t l e queer subtext, people had been theorizing about if since the movie came out, but were always yelled at by the internet for “imagining something that isn’t there”. But now, even with it being said that the initial point was for her to be gay, people have no objections to still refusing to accept it. Why?? So we can’t get the subtext gays OR the confirmed gays?? Make it make sense.

Brooklyn 99 (NBC) 2013

To have the queer characters firstly introduced without mentioning their sexualities and have it brought up naturally was so goddamn nice to see, because no one does a big deal about it unless they ask for that. This show is amazing in general but the way they show their queer characters is *chefs kiss*.

She-ra and the Princesses of Power (Netflix) 2018

This. Show. My heart SOARS. It's just a remake of an old show so absolutely nothing was ever expected, but then it was sprinkled in and ENDED WITH A BANG. And it was so beautiful and real to see the struggle of two friends who care for each other and want to be together but have different visions of the world fall in love. And they also had characters with disabilities, a non-binary character and jUST SUCH A GOOD SHOW.

Kipo and The Age of Wonderbeasts (Netflix) 2020

This is a case where you go into it not expecting anything and are BLOWN AWAY by the bare minimum. And not because it’s bad!! It's mind blowing because this is the simple representation we need!! Not something over the top, but an every day relationship. It’s just two boys falling in love and going on dates and being nervous around each other, yet i was so stunned. Because it’s not shown enough. I should not be this excited over something that should be this normal. 10/10 though this show is so good for all kinds of representation.

Steven Universe (Cartoon Network) 2013

This show did so much for queer representation with its general message of loving everyone and loving who you want. Especially since it was aired on Cartoon Network, a channel for kids, it was able to help normalize something so looked down upon in some circles. It made it easy to watch for s o m e people because it's a cartoon but it's so beautiful to see these ladies so in love with each other, both platonically and romantically and we see them have a family dynamic that isn’t a “nuclear family”. Rebecca Sugar (creator) really said “lemme just break all stereotypes real quick”.

Adventure Time (Cartoon Network) 2010

It's the “knowing a fanbase shipped something so hard that the creators made it canon” for me. This relationship had been theorized by fans for years, but it had never been explicit in the show. When the finale episode came out and the two shared a kiss, it was a moment of celebration. The producer of the show said that it had not really been planned but when the episode was being made, the choice of what happened was given to one of the artists (bless your soul Hanna K. Nyströmthe). And as the show releases little bonus episodes, its latest was centered around Marceline and Bubblegum and their relationship. AND WE LOVE TO SEE OUR DOMESTIC LESBIANS BEING HAPPY AND IN LOVE.

Yuri on Ice!!! (anime) 2016

The fact that an A N I M E gave us a love story between two men is mind boggling and it makes me so happy!! Especially because it's a Japanese show and they’re very conservative about these things just makes it more emotional. The creators said they wanted to make the anime take place in a world where gay/straight isn’t a thing, it’s just love (ladies, you’re going to make me cry). So as the weekly episodes came out and fans start speculating, THEY GAVE US THE LAST FEW EPISODES FULL OF ROMANCE AND EMOTIONAL SCENES BETWEEN THE TWO AND THEN THEY GET R I N GS?!???!! You watch for the figure skating, you stay for the figure skaters that are in love.

Shadowhunters (Freeform) 2016

*insert me being frustrated that the actors are straight so we can move on from that disappointment*

This show really said “let’s name a whole episode after this couple because they deserve it”. But seriously, they gave us two characters whose entire plot does not center around their sexualities while still showing us the differences in a relationship between someone experienced and someone new at this. They were both powerful and amazing characters apart from each other, with their own story lines and goals but they loved each other so much omgs. SO MUCH. 

It was so great to watch.

Love, Simon (2018) 

There’s a lot of disagreement on whether this movie is good representation or not. However, we need to take into consideration that this was Hollywood’s first movie with a main character that was gay, where the story’s focus was on Simon’s love story. The biggest problem, for me at least, was that the actor playing Simon is a straight man and not queer. My problem is not with him, but the fact that there are other actors that are gay and that could have played Simon just as well. (the love interested was however played by a queer actor so ✨progress✨)

All in all, this movie does represent what a lot of queer kids have to go through: being outed at school, how they then come out, the bullying and doubt they go through.

The book is also really good.

Call Me By Your Name (2018)

This movie is so aesthetically pleasing and was able to capture the confusion and heartbreak felt by a boy who’s struggling with his own feelings towards a man. His inner conflict and joy and l o v e he feels but doesn’t know how to deal with is so well communicated through the screen and just breaks your heart because it feels so real.

But again, they could’ve gotten gay actors to play gay characters…

through having this list here, i want to show you that it’s not hard for creators to give good queer representation. the LGBTQ+ community isn’t asking for much, we just want to be well represented on screen as just a regular character, not some token queer kid there for the diversity points. having been exposed to so much queerbaiting and just not seeing any representation on screen, i always get over-excited when i see a queer character, and that’s not how it should be. it should be a normal thing, something you can find in most pieces of media, just like there’s a straight white cisgender person in everything.

and they seriously need to start casting queer actors for queer characters...

[sasuhinasno1fan]

A promise to keep you safe- Lukadrien June Day 1

It’s here! My second @lukadrien-june​. I haven’t started s4 but just going off what I’ve heard others talk about, I don’t think I will. Instead I’ll just focus on my love for lukadrien which by this time last year had been a small growing love but is now my top ship of the whole show. Sorry Adrienette, just not really doing it for me anymore, but I still love you. Anyway, back to this month long event. This story was inspired by the k-drama, The Last Empress, which is basically about a normal girl who marries into the royal family. However, she finds out it was all a lie and that the royal family is corrupt and messed up and decides she’s going to bring them down. The head of security is an inside man also hoping to bring them down and the two get closer. We were robbed of them getting together in the show, but you can’t deny that’s where they were going, no matter how that show ended. I hope this doesn’t count as salt towards Gabriel, cause I can see him doing this and Audrey, well I needed a bad guy. Anyway, enjoy. Promise

Luka watched his sister pretty up the gift bag, trying not to think of the reason he had it in the first place. The royal family of France was, well, corrupt. It hadn’t always been like that, or maybe it had been but no one ever noticed because there were actual people who cared who spoke louder. To Luka, it was just the people he had to live ruling over his life. Then things changed.

He’d been on the Liberty about to sit down for a movie with his sister when they got a call no one ever wanted. Their mom, who’d been going to visit a friend had been hit in a hit and run and died. Having to go identify the body was one of the worst things in Luka’s life. The funeral, the Viking send-off she wanted (a safe version), the fear that they’d lose the Liberty and each other had it not been for an anonymous donation for the boat to stay with them and to help with Luka’s emancipation and getting custody of his sister.

During all this, he’d gotten a letter with an SD card. The card had a video, a traffic cam. It showed his mother walking back home when a black SUV suddenly came and ran into her. He watched the driver get out and look annoyed as he nudged Anarka with his foot. That driver was the King. The letter stated that the King’s engagement was used as an alibi to keep him clean and his car had seemingly vanished. If he wanted to help take the corrupt monarchy down, he needed to work at the castle. The only open position was part of the royal Imperial Guard. He’d promised his mom back when he was in lycée, he’d stay out of fights, but he hoped she’d forgive this just once. With a friend’s help, he created a fake identity, knowing the name Couffaine would raise flags with the King, passed the written exam and had been the only person still standing in the physical. He told Juleka to say he’d gone traveling to deal with their mother’s death and stay with her girlfriend if she thought it safe. He’d entered the palace, not knowing how things would go or even who to look for when it came to joining to bring the monarchy down.

Imagine his surprise when it turned out the Crown Prince was the one who sent him the letter.

“Why are you doing this?” Luka had growled, holding Prince Adrien by his collar in the unused wing of the castle he’d been asked to come to.

“Because it doesn’t matter who my father is, he deserves to be punished. I wish I could say he hasn’t always been like this but I know he has. Isn’t it strange that the Crown Prince almost never leaves the castle and neither did my mother after marrying my father?  My father has always been like this. My mother tried to bring him down and she’s dead. I’m not going to stop until I finish what she started.”

So he agreed to help, but he was cautious. For all he knew, the Prince would turn against him. He had quite the team already. Marinette, his personal assistant, whose grandfather had his heirlooms stolen by the King after refusing to sell them. Alya and Nino, Adrien’s PR team. Alya’s younger twin sisters and Nino’s younger brother all had rare blood types and needed a surgery for a simple procedure. Said blood type was also shared with the King and after an accident he had, the blood had been ripped from the kids. The children had gotten sicker and now stayed at the hospital waiting for another shipment. Chloe, who was the daughter of the King’s newest wife, had been insulted beyond believe by the King and treated like dirt. And now him, a person’s who mother was taken too early and the King wouldn’t take reasonability.

It became clear very quickly that the Prince, that Adrien meant what he said. He was good at pretending to be the prefect prince and obedient son, but he’d been collecting seeds and releasing them too slowly. First with the announcement of Duke Felix, nephew to the King was actually his illegitimate son. Then starting to release the questions of what happened to the Queen, starting with leaving clues to her real body.

He could see that doing all this was taking a toll on Adrien. The public was getting distressed and people wanted to point fingers. Luka wanted to help but instead Adrien wanted to focus on getting more information about Anarka’s death. The cover up, the moving of her body to be found else were, finding the missing car, finding out Nathalie’s whole involvement in all this. It started to boil up emotionally for Luka and after nearly taking care of the King himself, he left the castle and sat in front of his mother’s grave for hours before Adrien found him there.

“It’d be so easy to kill him, to make him pay.” Luka said, still holding onto his anger.

“It would be, but I don’t think your mother would want that.”

Luka remembered the anger just releasing at the thought of what his mother would tell him if he’d been closer to killing the King. “My mom was this wild chaos driven person. She came from a proper family and hated it. So when she got older, she went her own way. She raised us with such trust that we knew hiding things from her wouldn’t help us and we never wanted to disappoint her. I used to get into so much trouble with fighting. I guess my empathic ways really had a hard time dealing with everything and I would lash out. She was the one who encouraged me to use my music to speak, not my fists. I was never this weird person or uncontrollable child. I was her kid and she loved me and she didn’t deserve this.” He stared at her headstone. “She hated the cold.”

He hadn’t been expecting Adrien to take his scarf off, exposing his neck to the cold fall weather and wrap it around the headstone as best he could.

“I don’t know if this is enough, but I hope it helps. I’ll keep him from going too far, I promise. We’ll avenge you so you can rest easy knowing your kids are safe.” Adrien promised out loud.

If Luka hadn’t known it then, he knew it now. Prince Adrien Agreste was a kind person, nothing like his father and if the monarchy was ever to continue, would be France’s greatest ruler. He took so much on his shoulders and never said a word about it. So Luka promised himself he’d do whatever it took to lighten the load. Which lead him to now. It was a small thing, but he got his sister to pretty up the bag with a new scarf in it for Adrien.

“All done.” Juleka said, pushing the bag to her brother. “You know, I saw the scarf on Mom’s headstone. Rose said the scarf is actually pretty expensive.”

“I don’t think he cares about that.”

“No, I guess not.” Luka knew his sister worried about what he was doing but with the soft look on her face, he had a feeling she knew he was safe. “I think Mom would have liked him. She would have totally adopted him.”

Luka smiled to himself at the thought of his mom attacking the King just to protect Adrien. “Yeah, she would. I better go. Be safe, ok? Let me know what Rose’s parents say about you going with her to Achu.”

“I will as long as you stay safe too.”

“I promise.”

                                                       _____________

Adrien stretched out his neck. Being ordered by his step-mother to organize the annual bazar was weird. Usually the Queen would take care of organizing it but somehow Audrey ended up convince his father that Adrien and Felix should do it as Crown Princes. Felix wanted nothing to do with it and even though Felix was on his side, Adrien wasn’t about to force his brother into it since he had to announce to everyone who Felix really was in order to forward their plans. He had no clue how his mom had done this every year. Even with a bases of what to go off, it was a lot of work. Not to mention Audrey was monopolizing all the Queen’s staff that could help him with this. He was worried what she had in store for him and if his father would care for a few moments like he usually did.

A knock on the door interrupted his break. Hoping it was Marinette with more info he needed, he called for the person to come in. He was surprised when he saw it was Luka.

“What are you doing here? I thought you had the day off?”

“I do. I had to go get something.” Adrien then noticed Luka was hiding something behind his back. He raised an eyebrow at the bodyguard, who only smiled before pulling a gift bag from behind his back and placing it on the table. 

“What’s this?”

“Open it.”

Adrien was usually cautious when people gave him gifts as a fault, but he knew he could trust the people in his group. So he opened the bag and pulled out the deep blue scarf. The colour reminded him of the colour Luka used to have in his hair.

“You kept my mom warm and I know she’d ring my ear if I left you to get cold.” Luka explained.

“You didn’t have to do this.”

“I wanted to.” Luka plucked the scarf from Adrien and slowly wrapped it around his neck as to not startle him. “It looks good on you.”

Adrien pressed his face into the scarf, hiding his blush. He wondered if it said something that he didn’t flinch as much with Luka putting the scarf around his neck as he sometimes did with Nino throwing an arm around his neck. Maybe because they had the chance to interact more or maybe, when around Luka, Adrien just felt things he thought he wouldn’t feel.

Luka just had a way of getting past a person’s walls.

                                                   ___________

Luka tried not to feel rage. The royal family just didn’t give up. Audrey had practically ordered Adrien to take care of the annual bazar and then dragged Chloe and Felix – The Forgotten Royals as she played them up to be – to a photoshoot with the King that ran over into the bazar, leaving Adrien the only member of the royal family to attend the bazar. Audrey came down with a sudden illness.

The auction had been going on, still no sign of Chloe, Felix or the King when they reached the final item. An antique clock from the King’s collection. Luka watched Adrien talk about the clock, his hand on it when he yanked it away with a sudden ‘ouch’. He watched as he joked to the crowd about how metals retain heat and to not place the clock in direct sunlight. Luka remembered trying to understand how an antique clock, that had been out of the sun, could be hot. Unless there was something inside radiating heat. It what felt like snapshots, he’d warned Adrien, thrown the clock away and pulled Adrien to the floor as the bomb inside exploded. To see Adrien unconscious, blood dripping from the shallow cut on his neck, though at that moment, it looked much worse, it scared him. He barely even recognised the King as he picked Adrien up to get him to the medical wing. He wasn’t sure how long the concern the king held would last. Adrien didn’t stay in the medical wing long once he woke up. He demanded to stay in his room while he recovered and once the doctor set up his IV bag next to his bed and gave him a dose of pain killers, Luka was told to stay with the Prince and watch over him.

Luka knew as head of the guard for Adrien, he had paperwork to fill out for the incident, but he couldn’t move. He realised he was starting to feel stifled in his suit and stood up, hoping to duck out to change but stopped when something grabbed his hand.

Adrien looked up at him with lidded eyes, eyes that screamed fear laced with pain. “Don’t go, please?”

Dropping back down onto his chair, Luka held Adrien’s hand, using his other to wipe the tears that escaped the green eyes. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Those same green eyes locked on the one scratched Luka had gotten. He felt like such a failure for not keeping Adrien safe, for letting him get hurt worse than he did.

“You’re hurt.”

“It’s just a scratch. Just focus on getting better, ok?”

‘Get better so I don’t go crazy and kill either your father or Audrey. I haven’t decided yet.’

Adrien gently squeezed Luka’s hand. “Promise me you won’t leave?”

Luka pulled his hand away enough to link pinkies with the Prince. It didn’t matter that they were adults, this was how he swore things.

“I promise, I won’t leave you.” he pressed a kiss onto the interlocked pinkies and watched the tension leave Adrien.

Adrien made promises to him and his family and this was one Luka would keep forever. 

[brooklynislandgirl]

classic rom-com standards that define my ships: {Tropes}

Tagged By: the extraordinary K @kylo-wrecked Tagging: People who spend a lot of their time thinking about their muses and have not enough hours in the day. PART THE THIRD {{xx ~ part the first}} {{xx ~part the second}}

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

@rugini Baz and Beth ~ A Different Kind of Knight {Agents of Shield}

Love is Christmas || Sara Bareilles Let love lead us, love is Christmas Why so scared that you’ll mess it up? When perfection keeps you haunted All we need is your best my love, that’s all anyone ever wanted Love is how we do, let no judgement overrule it Love I look to you, and I sing Baz and Beth ~ Crash This Verse {AoS AU} Not in that Way || Sam Smith And I hate to say I love you When it's so hard for me And I hate to say I want you When you make it so clear You don't want me I'd never ask you cause deep down I'm certain I know what you'd say You'd say I'm sorry believe me I love you but not in that way

Baz and Beth ~ We All Have Our Secrets  Beautiful Crazy || Luke Combs Her day starts with a coffee And ends with a wine Takes forever gettin' ready So she's never on time for anything When she gets that come-get-me look in her eyes Well, it kinda scares me Beautiful, crazy She can't help but amaze me The way that she dances Ain't afraid to take chances And wears her heart on her sleeve ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

@whosxafraid

Luka and Beth ~ Tra La La La La/Small Broken Nobody’s {Immortal verse} All I Ask || Adele I will leave my heart at the door I won't say a word They've all been said before, you know So why don't we just play pretend? Like we're not scared of what's coming next Or scared of having nothing left Look, don't get me wrong I know there is no tomorrow All I ask is If this is my last night with you Hold me like I'm more than just a friend Give me a memory I can use Luka and Beth ~ A Hazy Shade of Grey {NY Cop AU} Whole Heart || Taylor Berret You went home thinking i was distant You thought it must have been what you said But i don't need no reasons to be upset When i can make up trouble in my own head But when i tell you you mean everything It's more than words i only half mean I know i'm failing but i'm trying hard I swear i'll be there when the tears start Before the sky comes falling and the seas part I'm gonna learn to love you with my whole heart Luka and Beth ~ Letters from Home {Travelling Soldier AU} Oceans Away || Arizona Few thousand miles and an ocean away But I see the sunrise, oh, just like the other day Picture your eyes as I fall asleep Tell myself it's alright, oh oh, as the tears roll by Ooh, I wish I could feel your face Ooh, I'm helpless when I'm oceans away Cathal and Mael Muire ~ Once Upon A Time In Ireland {Immortal/AG verse} Dark Night of the Soul || Loreena McKennitt Oh night thou was my guide Oh night more loving than the rising sun Oh night that joined the lover To the beloved one Transforming each of them into the other Upon that misty night In secrecy, beyond such mortal sight Without a guide or light Than that which burned so deeply in my heart That fire t'was led me on And shone more bright than of the midday sun To where he waited still It was a place where no one else could come Luka and Beth ~ Heavy is the Head {Mob AU} Beloved || VNV Nation My beloved do you know How many times I stared at clouds Thinking that I saw you there These are feelings that do not pass so easily I can't forget what we claimed as ours Luka and Beth ~ A Spoonful of Sugar {Nanny Verse} Little Wonders || Rob Thomas Let it slide Let your troubles fall behind you Let it shine 'Til you feel it all around you And I don't mind If it's me you need to turn to We'll get by It's the heart that really matters in the end Eighteen and Melakeni ~ Across the Universe {Star Wars AU} Cendres et Glace || Aythis ~ambient instrumental~ ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

@macdiari   

Lorcan and Beth ~ What Lies In Dust {Immortal/AG verse}

Closer || Nine Inch Nails Lorcan and Beth ~ Caillte {Rock Star Verse}

Secret Garden || Bruce Springsteen She'll let you in her house If you come knockin' late at night She'll let you in her mouth If the words you say are right If you pay the price She'll let you deep inside But there's a secret garden she hides You've gone a million miles How far'd you get To that place where You can't remember And you can't forget Lorcan and Mael Muire ~ Once Upon A Time in Ireland {Immortal/AG verse} Samhain Night || Loreena McKennitt And so our love's not a simple thing Nor our truths unwavering But like the moon's pull on the tide Our fingers touch, our hearts collide I'll be a moonsbreath by your side. Burn || The Cure "Oh don't talk of love" the shadows purr Murmuring me away from you "Don't talk of worlds that never were The end is all that's ever true There's nothing you can ever say Nothing you can ever do" Still every night I burn Every night I scream your name Every night I burn Every night the dream's the same Every night I burn Waiting for my only friend Every night I burn

[365days365movies]

May 10, 2021: Blade Runner 2049 (2017) (Recap: Part Two)

Said I’d talk about artificial humans in sci-fi, so...

There are a HELL of a lot of examples of artificial humans in science-fiction, as well as the ethical and philosophical concepts that their existence raises. Now, your definition of “artificial�� may differ from medium to medium. At its base form, these are humans that are not born, but made. I’ll be talking fleshy organic humans, not robotic ones. The most common of these is, of course, clones.

A clone, strictly speaking, is a genetically identical copy of a pre-existing organism, in this case a human. While this isn’t technology we’ve applied to humans as of yet (due to the NUMEROUS ethical problems and questions), we have done so with animals, mostly sheep and cats. It’s actually a good way to de-extinct certain species, and we’ve already done experiments with that. Of course...that has its own concerns.

Keeping up the Jurassic Park reference streak! Anyway...

There are a FUCKTON of examples of clones in science-fiction, but since I’m a massive comic book nerd, I’ll use Superboy. The genetic combination of Superman and Lex Luthor, Conner Kent is one of the most prominent clone superheroes. He’s not the only clone of Superman, of course. He’s not even my favorite clone of Superman, to be honest...

Bizarro am the worst. ME WILL LIVE ON THAT HILL.

Oh, and let’s not forget THE most prominent artificial human in comic books PERIOD. I don’t care what her origin in the movies is, that’s never been my favorite version of Wonder Woman. Making her a demigod robs her of something important, in my opinion.

...Should I make a comic book blog? Shit, thinkin’ about it.

OK, before I do that, these are just my favorite examples. Fact is, there are FAR too many examples of artificial humans to go into, whether they’re built, grown, sculpted, conjured, or a chemical reaction with an extra ingredient in the concoction.

And look, I could go on all day about this, but we got a long-ass movie to get back to. SO, lets jump back in. Part One is here!

Recap (2/2)

Understandably exhausted, K returns home, confused and conflicted. However, he’s greeted with a surprise from Joi: a prostitute! Namely, this is Mariette (Mackenzie Davis), one of the girls who approached him earlier. Joi’s called her here in order to be “real” for K, the effect is impressive, if somewhat...off-putting. Still, while K obviously didn’t need this to be happy with their relationship, Joi might, and Mariette’s all on board.

And it doesn’t take K terrible long to get on board, either. As both Mariette and Joi strip, it makes me wonder...how much does this subscription service for Joi cost. There’s no goddamn way this is free, right? Like, how exclusive IS this AI? And they cut from that scene to a Joi commercial, where we hear that Joi becomes anything you want her to be, and does anything you want her to do. But something tells me that...well, that it’s not quite so simple.

Once the night is over, Joi tells Mariette to leave, and not nicely either. Mariette leaves, rebuking her on the way out as well. K, meanwhile, knows that the Blade Runners will soon be coming after him. He’ll be going on the run, and Joi wants to go with him. And so, they put her inside of a remote device, while deleting her information from the main apartment console. This gets the attention of Luv, who head over to the apartment to figure out what’s going on.

K goes to Doc Badger (Barkhad Adbi), who analyzes the horse for him. It’s discovered that old radiation can be found there, and that amount and kind of radiation can only be found in areas where a dirty bomb has been set off. This would be in the desolate and weird-ass ruins of Las Vegas. While nobody lives there at this point, K and Joi go to check it out.

An IMMENSELY frustrated Luv, unaware of K’s discovery about himself, goes to confront Joshi about K’s whereabouts. Luv berates her for being afraid of change, and tells her that she “can’t fend off the tide with a broom”. Which is a great line. However, as Joshi is no use to her at this point, Luv just straight up kills her. Which, I’m sure, will go over well with the whole “Replicants aren’t dangerous” thing.

Meanwhile, in Vegas...shit is WEIRD. First off all, the desolate wasteland is full of statues of giant sexy wimmin, and I mean GIANT statues. Beneath one of them is a series of beehives, which K goes into to get a hand of beeeees. After that, he goes into an abandoned hotel/casino, rigged with tripwires and booby traps. OK. What.

So, somebody’s using this place as a hideaway, despite the entire city being destroyed by a dirty bomb, and probably extremely radioactive. K searches around and finds it empty. He begins to play a piano, hoping to draw someone out. He ends up drawing out a dog, as well as the inhabitant of the hotel.

Rick Deckard (Harrison Ford), baby! Quoting Stevenson’s Treasure Island and holding K up at gunpoint with dog at side is the original Blade Runner himself, Rick Fucking Deckard. God, I love this. Deckard hunts K down throughout the casino, where we see some trippy holograms, and the future of Vegas stageshows (probably).

The two fight, but eventually call a truce and decide to get a drink at the bar. K gets to it pretty quickly, and confronts Deckard on his potential child with Rachael. He confirms that Rachael was indeed pregnant by him, but he had never met his child. Which was the plan, to be fair. He wanted their child to be protected, not hunted down and eventually dissected.

Sometimes, to love someone...you gotta be a stranger.

To an old Frank Sinatra song, a forlorn K (now calling himself “Joe”) looks around, and sees carved wooden animals that resemble the horse that’s haunted his life and memories so much by this point. Which makes sense, considering the foil unicorn from the previous film. Neat little tie-in there.

But paradise is not all it’s cracked up to be, as someone soon comes to find both K and Deckard, despite the fact that K came alone. Although, now that I think about it, Joi may not be one that you can truly trust. Deckard and K try to escape their pursuers, but are caught pretty quickly. In the process, K is injured, but manages to get up in order to fight back. However, this is Luv with these people, and she beats K down EASILY. Turns out that Luv is actually an enforcer, rather than just a secretary. And when Joi awakens from K’s device to ask her to stop, well...she kills the device, and she kills K. In the process, she also takes Deckard away, leaving K behind. Fuck.

K wakes up, only to discover Mariette standing over him in the Las Vegas wasteland. She takes care of him as he wakes up, also stitching up with wounds from the explosion. She tells K to trust her, as well as her compatriots. One of them is the hooded woman from earlier, a Replicant named Freysa (Hiam Abbass). An old friend of Sapper’s she saw the delivery of the child, the “miracle”, and also hid the child away, as it was a symbol that the Replicants are more than just slave, that they are their own masters.

Freysa is building a revolution in order to free the Replicants once and for all. And I’m hard-pressed to disagree with their cause, not gonna lie. However, this comes at a price. In order to prevent Wallace from killing the cause, K must prevent Deckard from leading them to Freysa. They must do what they can until they can reveal the child to the world. For she will be their leader.

Fuck.

Understandably COMPLETELY crushed at this revelation, and more confused than ever, K collapses. Freysa tells him that they ALL wish they were the one, and they all believe. It’s at this point, that K realizes exactly who the Hybrid is: Dr. Ana Stelline. The horse from earlier, it turns out, did in fact belong to her, and she planted her childhood memory with the horse in K’s mind as a Replicant. Damn. DAMN! That’s why the memory moved her so: because it was hers.

Meanwhile, Deckard awakens to a separate nightmare: Jared Leto telling him how he feels about him. After all, Deckard helped to create the first Replicant-human hybrid. He asks him for his help in obtaining the child, so that the key of Replicant reproduction can be further unlocked. And he proceeds in convincing Deckard by playing audio of Rachael and his first meeting (from the first film, of course).

Niander fucks with him further, by suggesting Deckard was summoned all those years ago specifically to fall in love with Rachael in order to father a child with her. But despite all of this, Deckard refuses to give up any of his information. And so, Niander pulls out his ace-in-the-hole...and it’s a real shitty thing to do to a man in mourning. 

Damn. Dude rebuilt Rachael, tries to tempt Deckard with her, FAILS, then lets Luv shoot her in the head. Fucking power move, and fuck Niander for playing it. Dude is a DICK. Meanwhile. that one visual from every single ad of this movie is happening, and I can FINALLY use one of the 8000 GIFs of it, goddamn.

Not gonna lie, it’s an iconic appearance, so I get why it’s so famous. Anyway, K considers a suicidal option, now that he knows the truth. However, before we get to see the final decision, we get to see Deckard being taken back to LA for interrogation by Wallace. However, to prevent him from potentially leading Wallace to the secret of Ana Stelline, K suddenly appears, opening fire on their ship.

The craft is downed, and K exits the car to engage in a firefight with Luv. He appears to win, but Luv isn’t killed once she’s shot. The two have a fistfight out in the rain, and Deckard waits for water to slowly kill the craft that he’s still inside of.

As expected, Luv handles herself well, and despite a number of close calls, she JUST. WILL. NOT. DIE. Damn, she’s resilient. However, despite K, Luv, and Deckard all nearly drowning in an INTENSE fight between the Replicants, an enraged and crazed Luv finally eventually drowns, ending her threat for good. 

K saves Deckard from the sinking ship, and agrees to stage his death, allowing him to meet his daughter for the first time. Once at her facility, K returns Deckard’s horse to him, knowing that it was a gift from him. He tells Deckard that his best memories all come from her, implying that this makes him similar to Deckard’s son, which he picks up on when he asks if he’s OK.

Deckard goes to meet his daughter, and K hangs out on the stairs outside. He feels the snow fall on his hand, and he just...watches it all fall around him. He sits, and he watches it all. And meanwhile, Deckard meets his daughter for the first time.

...Can I just say...GODDAMN!

That movie was absolutely stellar, and it’s definitely landing in the high ‘90s for me, calling it now. I...wow. Seriously. Amazing.

See you in the Review!

[searching-in-silence]

Hi there! I just wanted to say your videos are absolutely amazing. Your channel is undoubtedly one of the best jikook channels out there. I love how your videos are perfectly analysed and well-planned. I have many unanswered questions about jikook that I hope you can try to answer(no pressure though) Sorry about my English its not my first language so I’ll try my best. I apologise if I wrote too much and asked too many questions.

1) The Rings. Jikook were spotted wearing similar rings right after their trip to Tokyo if I’m not mistaken. Some say that they are engagement rings for gay couples while some even say that they are wedding rings. Needless to say, the rings were spotted many times and sparked a debate about the origin and reason of the rings. In one of the VLIVE when Hobi was shaking Jimin’s hand he stopped for a while and fingered something on Jimin’s hand and laughed. Jimin got all flustered and blushed while JK was smiling and didn’t look up. In another incident, they were with the fans I think when Jk suddenly started talking about the ring on his finger. He took it from Jimin’s hand and slipped it right on his pinky finger. It was like he already knew where Jimin’s ring fit him perfectly. Later he said that the ring was special and if anyone touched it, he will become fly to heaven because he is an angel.(in serendipity jimin sings about how that person is his world and his angel. naui cheonsa naui sesang) K-jikookers said that Jk’s speech was informal and in banmal. Hobi even jokingly reprimanded him saying what are you speaking in our presence as in in his hyung’s presence as it was informal speech. K-jikookers said it was how people talked in anime like anime speech in when they are in presence of the person they loved or their crush. Recently, Jikook were spotted having new matching rings and someone googled the rings and said that they were couple rings. There are many other moments but I couldn’t possibly fit all in here so I would love to hear your opinion on the rings.

2)The Bighit editors. The editors definitely know that something is different between jikook as they have been with them quite long and they edit alot of clips too so they could have noticed something from there too. There are many instances where us jikookers get robbed of jikook clips and moments. These are not speculated clips and are in fact clips where it is obvious that something happened. Like for example Jimin’s hand were approaching Jk’s face and than the clips get cut and the next moment Jimin is turning back to his normal position and his hand is gone. So we can assume that they don’t want us to know what happened between those two. But at the same time if we assume that they don’t want us to know about jikook the theory is not exactly right either. For example, there are some very obvious jikook moments. They are moments that don’t need any analising and anyone with two eyes can see them. So if Bighit editors saw these they will know that the shippers will go crazy and believe in the ship even more. Yet, they let the moments be there and sometimes they even highlight the moment by putting an obvious subtitle or editing in roses and petals around jikook. You can say that it is only a joke but I don’t think so. So, I would love to have your opinion on this too.

 3) Alot of people are perfectly fine talking about this while others are uncomfortable discussing it. I am not exactly open about it too as I think whatever happens between two people in the bedroom stays in the bedroom but at the same time, I am genuinely curious about it too. Do you Jikook have ever engaged in any sexual activity? They have alot of obvious sexual tension and desire between them. You don’t have to answer it if you aren’t comfortable and if you are….. who do you think is top and bottom(hehe i might be a little too curious)

 Love you(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Hugsss(づ ◕‿◕ )づ Thank youuu❤ (ɔˆз(ˆ⌣ˆc)

From SIS: Thank you for sending me this ask! Here’s your response - https://youtu.be/M3W4YV0t68E (3:04)

[scrapironflotilla]

Anzac is so much more than Gallipoli

Another Anzac day has come around and with the lock-downs and global pandemic it seemed like it would be different. But having a listen to the news or a quick scroll through the other blue hellsite, F*c*b**k, it looks like this Anzac Day is more similar than different. The reverence, the mystique and the myths are all still there, with a massive dose of social media self indulgence. So I’ll probably stay away from that today and instead talk about some history.

I don’t have a favourite aspect of the Anzac legend. I don’t think I even can. The very concept of the Anzac Legend bothers me. This is our recent history. Its members, who have all died, are still within living memory of many millions of people. The events are so well documented that we can follow some of them minute by minute in the diaries, letters and reports created by the participants. I understand the desire to turn these stories into legend and myth, especially in a country like Australia after the war and certainly in the last decades of the 20th century.

I understand how the virtues and values of the AIF made for such fertile imaginative ground in an inter-war world. The romance of war, lost on the battlefields of Europe and the Middle East, was much harder to destroy far away in the colonies, where people experienced little hardship compared to those on the continent.

I understand how and why the AIF became a legend. But I don’t think I can believe in it.

But what does it matter if I believe in it or not? It’s important to tens of millions of Australians and the government tightly controls public commemoration and the Anzac brand. The military indoctrinates its members with to strive for an unattainable Anzac perfection. A newly minted army officer once told me that during his training his instructors had screamed at these cadets, ranting at them about how unworthy they were, how they could never live up to the Anzac reputation and how they could never lead a digger.

It draws hundreds of thousands every 25 April to dawn memorial services across the world, in events whose gravitas and sombre communion even I can’t deny. It’s this secular religion that makes the legend a reality that we have to contend with. The history may vary widely from the myth, but the myth is potent enough and popular enough to be able to divorce itself from the past. “The AIF”, historian Peter Stanley points out, “has become revered as [our] romantic nationalist mystique”.

The last two or three decades has seen a steady dismantling of the Anzac legend, at least in academic circles. All its basic tenets of natural fighting prowess, mate-ship, equality and the rest have been questioned, criticised and reassessed. But this new understanding hasn’t moved far beyond academia. The short spike in Anzac TV series during the centenary showed the same romantic tragedy and nationalist triumphalism. Popular histories from the 50s and 60s were reprinted and a new slew of books turn up on shelves, from children’s books to all kinds of history and dozens of romance novels. The legend remains deeply entrenched in the Australian imagination. Little in the popular realm even attempts to challenge it in light of new understanding. Even for those in academia the revision of that history has produced harsh reaction from the right, I’m exactly one of those “cadre of academics” associated with those elite, Canberra institutions, that noted crank Bendle talks about there. But that’s the strength of this legend. Its followers take any attempt to examine it and broaden it as denigration. Lest anyone think I’m exaggerating here, just have a look at what happened to ABC presenter Yassmin Abdel-Magied after she tweeted the words “LEST.WE.FORGET. (Manus, Nauru, Syria, Palestine...)” on Anzac Day 2017. She was attacked by the press and government ministers and bombarded with rape and death threats. There’s no doubt much of the faux outrage was inspired by racism and misogyny, but you don’t even need to attack Anzac, but merely recognise that Australia’s history is less than perfect, to be met with a violent, histrionic reaction.

To imagine that the Anzacs were perfect, individually and as a whole, is wilful delusion. They were men and as such fallible. It is no dishonour or disrespect to recognise their humanity in all its complexities. We must know and understand their failures, their embarrassments and their crimes (for they are many and varied) to better place their successes, victories and virtues. To deify them and to force them to represent only what was best, without recognising the fullness of their character, good and bad, robs them of the complexity of their own stories. It robs them of their humanity and us of our history. But while I struggle with the Anzac Legend, I also think there are some little stories that deserve better recognition.

The Anzac mythology upholds a very particular character as representative of the AIF, but little about this legend is uniquely Australian. The language used to express the values, that of the larrikin, the digger and above all else mateship, may be particularly Australian but the values are not. Irreverence and camaraderie are close to universal.

These aren’t values to be denigrated in any way. But they’re representative of most militaries in war. But the AIF did have a character unique to the Australian experience. Much is made of the fact that the AIF was an entirely volunteer organisation. From a population of fewer than five million more than 330,000 men and women served in its ranks between 1914 and 1918. Conscription was put to the people in referenda twice and twice it was defeated. People joined the AIF for the duration of the war. Few pursued careers in the military and although many had prior service it was in the militia, the part time army.

The ranks were filled from the cities, the suburbs and the bush by civilians. Even the officer corps was fleshed out by the professional and middle classes of lawyers, bankers, teachers and the like. These men saw themselves not as regular soldiers, but as civilians in uniform. They saw their role as merely a job, not a calling. They were there to fight the war, to defeat Germany, or the Ottomans, and to go home and back to the farm or the factory.

Australia had one of the strongest trade union and labour movement in the world in the early 20th century. It was the first country to vote a labour government into office and ideas of unionism, collective bargaining and fair work practices were strong in the minds of many working Australians. The language they used and the tactics they employed to deal with the discipline and hierarchy of the military demonstrates just how powerful these beliefs were. Soldiers routinely referred to their officers as their boss, refused orders they thought were unfair and protested their ill treatment by military authorities. They released soldiers imprisoned under field punishment, refused to salute officers and rejected the distinction between officers and other ranks imposed by the British army. They went into clubs, restaurants and hotels set aside of officers, believing strongly that they had the right to drink or eat where they chose.

They took strike action when they felt too much was asked of them, when they were refused rest or when they felt hard done by. When battalions were to be broken up due to lack of replacements in 1918, they mutinied. Refusing orders to disband, they ‘counted out’ senior officers sent to negotiate with them. Counting out consisted of soldiers on parade counting down from ten to one, before shouting a final obscenity at the officer concerned. It was a powerful form of insubordination that humiliated officers when it occurred.

In autumn 1918, after months without leave, Australian battalions took to strike action when they were ordered back into battle. After being promised a fortnight’s rest they were ordered back to the front for an offensive after just a few days. Unhappy troops - veterans, mostly - refused to move. The battalions were well understrength after months of fighting and the men felt they had been lied to, that they had sacrificed enough and that they were being overused. The soldiers took action in the way they knew how. They shot no officers and destroyed no property. For men used to fighting for their rights in the workplace it was natural that they would turn to collective action in trade union style.

(Ex-union organiser and Labor prime minister Billy Hughes, seen here with some of his beloved men. Hughes was a favourite of the Australian troops who dubbed him ‘the Little Digger’)

And so it was in the 15th Brigade, under the command of Harold Elliot. Called Pompey by him men he was a courageous and fatherly figure, both liked and respected by the men under his command. It was his unique character that allowed Pompey to negotiate with his men, although rant and then plead were the words used by diarists, and convince them to follow his orders. Other officers, less well known and less admired by their men failed in similar efforts.

The civilian attitudes made them difficult soldiers to discipline. The standard punishment of the army, called ‘field punishment’ was particularly odious to Australians. Field punishment consisted of being bound to an object, a post or a wagon or gun carriage in the open for a number of hours. Due to the danger of artillery this punishment was not just humiliating but also potentially fatal. Diaries and letters from soldiers are full of stories about field punishment. They usually tell of Australian troops coming across British soldiers undergoing field punishment and freeing them, fighting with guards and military police.

There was a powerful resistance to the dehumanising and anti-individualising aspect of military discipline and authority. The AIF by and large saw themselves as civilians first and soldiers second. They understood the need for discipline and obedience and as more than one Australian noted “we have discipline where it matters”, on the battlefield. But the trappings of military culture and authority were repellent to the Australian working man. Strict obedience to hierarchy and the seemingly pointless requirements of military discipline were not only alien to Australians but went against their own values. Mutual respect was the key to the AIF as most of its officers discovered.

This side of the AIF, the strength of its civilian values is one that ought be remembered and celebrated in Anzac. The ideas from the labour and union movements, the fair go and mutual respect deserve a place alongside mateship and the larrikin as part of Anzac. The men who fought for the eight-hour work day and living wages were the same men who filled the ranks of the AIF and who fill Australian cemeteries in Europe and Turkey.

This is a part of the Anzac story that deserves a better place in our telling of it.

[jedivszombie]

36, 44, 51, 59 💗

Thank you, thank you Mari! Having to put under a read more because I went off. 

help me freak out about F1: send me some F1 asks

36. What were some of your favourite races?

I know I will miss so many because like my brain is currently like a sieve but these are the ones that immediately come to me: 

Canada 2011, Canada 2011, CANADA 2011!!!!!! Guys honestly, 15 y/o Maisie was just vibing - I got to stay up late, it was wet, DC and Martin had to commentate about the birds in the rain while it was red flagged. It all seemed hopeless for Jenson and then suddenly he won it and honestly it was up there with when he won the WDC in 2009. 

Monza 2006 - three words: Kubica’s First Podium!!!!! guys he had been in the sport for 3 races, he ended up on the podium, beside bloody Michael Schumacher, it was epic. 

Canada 2008 - I will say that society has progressed past the need to replay Robert’s Canada 2007 incident every time they talk about crashes because I still hate it. BUT 2008 he returned and he said fck u Canada for destroying my car I’m going to win, and he did! It was wonderful, I cried. 

Monaco 2018 - Daniel finally winning in Monaco brought so much joy, almost as much joy as when he won his first ever race, god bless. 

Austria 2002 - super memorable, tears on the podium, tears in our living room, 6 year old Maisie cursing Michael out for being a bastard and then sobbing when he gave Reubens the top step??? Yeah iconic for the drama as much as anything. 

44. Where would you want to have a race?

This is a difficult one, I would love a race in London (because it’s super easy for me to get to) but also like that’s NEVER gonna happen. 

So, I would love a race in Germany. Oh, didn’t we have a race in Germany I hear you ask? Yes, yes we did. We used to have 2 different tracks we could race on in Germany in fact (leads the crowd chanting: BRING BACK NÜRBURGRING). 

I could also vibe with a race in France, it’s a shame we don’t currently have one. 

51. Which was your favourite line up?

Aahhhhh now you’re asking a tough question. There is no ONE fave line up, as with most other things. So I’m gonna answer with many:

Jenson and Lewis (so soft, so fun, great competitors) 

Flonso and Jenson (the only teammates Flonso has vibed with have been Stoffel and Jenson and I dig that) 

Michael and Reubens (THAT’S MY CLOWN TEAM!! FEAT. OGs Ross Brawn and Jean Todt)

Seb and Mark (the DRAMA kids, the dRAMA!)

Esteban and Daniel (we have been robbed of a great duo guys I can’t impress this on you enough)

Checo and Lance (honestly just real father-son vibes here) 

Robert K and Nick Heidfeld (that’s my polish husband with my ewok thank uuu) 

59. Which is your favourite ship?

Sooooo like I vibe with Sewis, Dansteban, Andrea Stella and Flonso and Sebson (unwillingly I am a Sebchal fan but it’s all of YOUR faults and that fcking all the things she said fancam). I vibe with these guys platonically - top pals the lot of them. 

[bbq-hawks-wings]

Is kado the more reserved one? Might be easier to use the "my ship in 5 minutes" template for these type of questions

Not a bad idea! I’ll just stick it all under the cut.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

More Reserved: Depends on what you mean by reserved. Between the two of them, she definitely doesn’t like to wear her heart on her sleeve at first unless she’s really upset.

First to confess their feelings: Hawks. Kado is terrible with verbal affection and while you would be able to tell by her actions she acts on her real feelings first, he’s the one to put it into so many words. You might want to grab a snack, though, it takes a while to begin with.

First to apologize after a fight: Both will, but Kado tends to be more proactive about not letting things fester (her family basically tore itself apart over that, and the last thing she wants is to become her mother) and clearing the air.

The more popular/charismatic: Hawks is more immediately likeable. Kado is an acquired taste.

The best caregiver when the other is sick: Hawks is much affectionate and present when available. Kado’s brand is a little more “tough love” in a, “What the hell are you doing out of bed? Get your ass back under the covers, eat this soup, and get some sleep before you make yourself miserable.” kind of way.

Does the cooking: Neither has issues with cooking, but Kado has designated herself the cook.

Does the housework: Same as above.

Does most of the speaking: Hawks - habits just die hard. Kado prefers to listen and make her words count instead of filling up the space with words.

The overprotective one: It’s situational, but Kado is the more obviously protective one, particularly in situations where Hawks might not be able to enforce boundaries with others without it blowing back on him.

Designated driver: I have a feeling Hawks prefers to stay sober and in control in most cases. Kado is more likely to indulge and let loose.

Has good penmanship: They’re probably both on about the same level.

Has more experience with relationships: Kado. She didn’t have a formal relationship or much outside experience outside of her relationship with Hawks, but it’s still more than he’s had.

Sensitive to subtle changes in their partner: Kado is more likely to pick up on subtleties - micro-expressions, minor changes in tone, shorter fuse, etc.

The one who proposes: Hawks. In Kado’s mind, they basically skipped right to the end from a legal standpoint, so a wedding was kind of pointless. Hawks was of the opinion she was basically robbed of a “normal” romantic relationship development and deserved to be celebrated “properly” as the love of his life.

The one who dies protecting the other: Hawks. Kado isn’t nearly on the level of defensive/offensive power as him, but she’d rather they both go out before she leave his side if things ever got dire. “We go together or not at all.”

Nicknames: Kado calls Hawks lots of affectionate insults in front of others, “Big bird, Chicken wing, dingus” (very tsundere) but has a fair share of softer ones in private, “pretty bird, hey you, dingus” (still tsundere, but sweeter) but has a secret one for special circumstances - “K” which for the longest time was the only clue she had to his real name that he offered her. Even after learning the whole, “Keigo” she still prefers to just call him “K.”

Hawks was the first person to call her just “Tama” (she always introduced herself as Kado or “call me Kado”), and saves a special “my Tama” for special circumstances. Some special friends may get to call her Tama-chan, but only Hawks gets to use Tama without an honorific.

Showing Affection: Both are mostly non-verbal in expressing affection, and then it’s mostly through acts of service or gifts.

Handling Conflict: Both are fairly quick to forgive (or agree to disagree) and neither are big about starting arguments. It’s just better to make disagreement plain and let it slide if it’s only just an annoyance that will pass.

Dealing with Jealousy: Neither are particularly prone to jealousy without reasonable cause. There was a point a couple years in they agreed to a break to try and give each other a chance to “escape” in a sense if it would make the other happier, but they independently decided they were fine with the relationship they’d already built together and actually preferred it.

Attachment: Both are very independent people and don’t necessarily need huge amounts of attention, but they do come to really miss the other if they aren’t there at the end of the day to unwind with or wake up together.

Relationship Attitude: They’re considerably reserved in front of others and don’t appreciate an audience to displays of affection (”mind your own business, we’re not looking for a third”), but take the relationship very seriously. They worked hard to make this work, dammit, and they’re not about to leave each other out to dry at this point!

Embarrassing Story:

So you know how individuals’ descriptions of their quirks change over time because they get a better idea how it works with experience? Kado didn’t know for a long time that she had venomous saliva, and the story of how she found out makes Hawks laugh for years to come.

When they finally both acknowledge an attraction to each other, they decided it would be easier to ease into the physical stuff slowly - just a nice dinner date in to set the mood, and a glass of two of wine to grease the wheels a bit so making out on the couch isn’t so awkward at first. It goes great for a while! They get comfortable and into it after a bit, and Hawks is feeling a little bold to show some skin; but when he stands up to take off his shirt he realizes that fuzzy feeling in his brain isn’t just the wine or the heat of the moment and he looses his footing pretty dramatically. He doesn’t immediately snap out of the daze and feels far more intoxicated than he should over a barely more than a glass of wine, and Kado rushes him to the doctor in worry.

He begins to feel better towards the end of the exam, but they still don’t know what happened to him. They go through what happened up until he fell and the doctor (a heteromorph specialist) suddenly has an epiphany.

“Ma’am, sorry to interrupt, but are you a heteromorph?”

“Y-yes.”

“Do you know what kind?”

“Uh... Octopus, basically?”

“I see... Would you mind if we ran some tests?”

“What kind of tests?”

“We’re going to need a saliva sample.”

Turns out, she’s got a mild venom that causes symptoms similar to intoxication if enough is injected (or ingested, in this case) but is otherwise harmless.

“I would be careful if he’s on any kind of medication or if you’re drinking heavily, but otherwise you two should be fine.”

Hawks laughed all the way from the clinic home, and Kado wanted to sink into the ground.

[eyelash-stealer]

Things I thought while watching season one of Lego Ninjago for the first time since I was a kid during quarantine (part 2)

Episode 3

Sensei: RISE AND SHINE GAMERS. LET'S GET THIS BREAD

That's called Backne Cole

Ew

Honestly the outfit designs need a lot of work. I think they fix it eventually though

Free my mans from the floor

Nya hands out with sensei a lot what's that about

He is freed

Who is going to watch that garage sale of someone comes by. You're gonna get robbed

The writing on the Garage Sale sign I'd nice though

The ice effects are sick

Okay that's cool-

Pirate boiz

They got video games >:/

Race car

How did they know where they moved if they JUST moved and send lets

The accents omg

Called?

Jay is such a dick to his parents

OOP

How do Jay's parents know his type what the actual fuck

How do they understand everything so soon

Cappuccino machine? That was Cole's idea

T h e b u t t o n

Jay you don't have watch

He's do mean to his mom and dad they seem so sweet

Sensei is so sassy I'm crying

What a sweet realation ship:)

Lloyd be honest with yourself and go back to school

Fangpyres? What the hell?

That's not how dust works

He deserved that

The fangpyres are thicc

Oh I hate that. The double head talking thing

Jay's dad: the grind never stops

Oop

They love their son so much and Jay barely shows them any love it makes me sad

DONT HURT THEM

Oh no :(

The fangpyre are slow

What the f u c k ?

Are these snake people italian?

NOOOO

Edna and Ed deserve better

The ninja crew needs to learn respect for their friends oh my god

Honestly jay deserves the guilt tripping a bit

Nya that god

Dragon puberty

YES

Kai is wonderful

Who gives a shit about flutes

Jay is almost like Leo Valdez but so much more of a dick. He shows zero sympathy

YAY THEY'RE ALIVE

That wrecking ball looks like a Jack-o-lantern

Omg Jay is caring about his parents

YES NYA

Lloyd you bitch

I really wish they didnt need to yell "Ninja go!"

O h

I'd love to live in Jay's junkyard

"Wasnt there four of us?" Kai for the live of god

There it is again with the poor animation. Specifically on his face mask

Also why do they need masks of everyone knows who they are

Ew teeth levers

Wa-pow

NO EDNA AND ED

o h s h i t

That's cool ngl the whole weapon transportation

Cole's is the coolest

Poor rocky

Poor sensei

Damnit Jay

Straight to headquarters while yoite being FOLLOWED!?!

Bad animation

Parent love :)

Their ship is litterally the Argo II it flies, holds heroes

Awww they're so proud of him :)

Episode 4

The theme song slaps. When I was little I could recite the whole thing and I've still got it ;)

The falcon :D

WHAT THE FUCK

WHAT JUST HAPPENED

Hunt?

"Little friend" aww

Bye bye falcon

Wh-

Is this still a dream I'm so confused

Zane is so bad ass

Loving the electric guitar

The music and fight in this scene are gold

We stan. Green ninja and the falcon

I remember that Lloyd is the green Ninja and I love him but he was such an annoying kid

B i r d s

"Some dream"' that sounded suggestive

Hell yeah Cole

Yoga

I love Kai honestly

They need to train more so I'm with Sensei

"We're smart"' u h n o

This show moves too quickly

Oh my god they're friends

The snakes:"They were roommates!"

Lloyd:"Oh my god they were roommates"

Dang, shade

Bye bye Lloyd get going

Did any of the Ninjas look at the scroll? It showed all for of then with the green ninja in the middle. It's obvious not one of them!

I think the camera went from Lloyd's POV and I think it's funny because it shows when. He starts walking and *snort*

LONGG NECK

The snake guy reminds me of the purple guy from Monsters inc.

"Chumsworth" LMAO

They're bonding over having no friends-

Ooo Cole look at those moves

They're gonna scooter omg-

This is top notch bonding

Those babies are HUGE

Aww how sweet

*Quietly*"six schools in six years, been kicked out of every place"

So mean to a kid

Why would they kick Lord Garmadon's son out

Also better question: why is the government allowing there to be a school for evil masterminds

WHAT KIND OF SIGH IS THAT

Sleeby boy

Oooo sensei is a artist

Damn

The Argo II sets sail

Classy as hell school right there

Those skeletons are great

Is Lloyd skateboarding? Either that or they didnt animate his walk

HE IS SKATEBOARDING?

Don't trust Jay

That's one way to do it

Those kids are probably murderers

[teamhook]

A Chapter Day... Savage Heart CS AU

A love story between a pirate and his savior. An innocent, beautiful, selfless woman meets a man with no manners, no formal education and not even a last name. Will Emma fall in love with Killian once she discovers that beneath his tough exterior lies a heart-wild, but a heart of gold? This is a Captain Swan AU

Beta-ed by the awesome @ilovemesomekillianjones​​

|AO3| |FFN| previous chapter

|AO3| |FFN| current chapter

Chapter 15: The Lies We Tell Ourselves

The window is ajar and the breeze slowly enters and engulfs the room, filling it with a hint of sea salt air. He misses his home by the sea, and yet he can not blame his sleepless night on the nostalgia that plagues him. Emma is the true culprit of his current sleeplessness.

Killian tosses and turns; he is anxious and that scares him. He knows he needs to tell Emma the true nature of his trip to Arendelle, but he is crippled with fear by the thought of her once again seeing him as she did when they first met. That thought makes him second guess his decision more than once.

The truth is simple; they are going to be married soon and although they are not marrying because they are madly in love, he still needs to start this relationship with a clean slate. He has no idea if her father is aware of his involvement and to avoid her hearing the sordid tale from another source, he prefers for her to hear it from his lips. He feels he owes her this much, at the very least.

That's his decision and he is sticking to it. It is settled he will tell Emma the truth. Although he had no prior knowledge of the connection between the owner of Nolan Shipping and Exporting and the Nolan's in town when the business had first been targeted, he knows this surely will not absolve him of guilt.

The influential people that were known to use Nolan's services had painted a target on the business, if it hadn't been him it would have been another. He knew that the strong room in the cellar would surely be filled with treasure. He had no doubt that his talented nimble fingers would be able to crack the lock. It was supposed to have been an easy score for someone of his skills.

Finally, with the decision made to tell her the truth, his eyes begin to feel heavy, he can barely keep them open and he succumbs to sleep.

The next morning Killian wakes and sets out in search of Emma. He finds her outside picking flowers in the garden.

He approaches her and once he is close enough he clears his throat to capture her attention. Emma finally looks up and smiles brightly at him.

"Good morning, love. You look stunning," Killian says while he is slowly approaching her. He looks down at the flowers in her basket and gently picks one up and tucks it in behind her ear along the loose strand of her golden hair.

She blinks dazedly at the contact and without knowing holds her breath as she turns her eyes to Killian. She tilts her head and smiles as she offers her reply, "Good morning, sleep well?"

Killian's demeanor changes quickly and he looks around, anywhere but at her. "Love, I have something I need to speak to you about, and I believe it to be important." He scratches behind his ear while he waits for a response.

"Oh, of course, should we head back inside and go to the office?" Emma asks as she takes a step toward the house.

He shakes his head, quickly dismissing the idea and guides her back to the lovely little patch of flowers she was at seconds before. "I would prefer to continue to enjoy the lovely scenery with you a bit longer, we can talk here," he says. Killian takes off his long coat and lays it on the ground for her to sit upon.

She smiles as she takes his hand and he helps her lower herself to sit on his coat. The fabric is so much softer than it looks, she thinks as she caresses the coat. Looking at him as he slowly sits down next to her she can tell he is nervous, but why?

"Emma, I will just get this over with. I hope you understand how difficult this is for me, and although that should not sway you into forgiveness, know that I am doing to this to give us our best chance. As you know, I have led a life of crime all my adult life and I have done a variety of questionable things I am not proud of, but what I'm about to tell you may change your mind regarding our upcoming nuptials. Months ago, when my relationship with Milah was in full bloom, I went to Arendelle on what was meant to be a very lucrative job for my associates and myself. It is safe to say it was not a lawful endeavor and I was caught by the Arendelle Navy. I was put in prison on charges of piracy against a shipping and exporting company there. That business was your father's," Killian says and looks at her carefully.

Emma studies him for a moment, she ponders what he's told her, and why he is telling her. "You are telling me that you were going to rob my father's company. Why would you simply be released without a trial? I don't understand."

"Yes, Emma, I was there to steal from your father's' business. I admit it. At the time I had no idea of the connection between him and Milah, much less you. I was released not because of my innocence but because my long lost brother felt mercy for me. I would have most likely met my death there. Arendelle shows no leniency when it comes to pirates. I could have easily kept this from you and hoped you would have never become the wiser, but I made the choice to share this tale with you. I solemnly believe I would not have pursued the job had I known of the familial connection you share with David Nolan. I only made the connection between you and the business during my conversation with Archie yesterday."

"Your brother let you go, just like that? Doesn't that affect his job?"

"Aye, it could. I suspect he was only doing it because I mentioned I wanted to get back to my love that I was to marry," Killian says.

"The job was unfinished, correct?" she asks.

"Aye, I was in jail and the rest of the crew was either killed during the capture or in a cell not far from my own," Killian says. "Emma, I know this is a lot to take in. I will give you time to take into consideration what I have just shared with you. If you choose to cancel the wedding, I will understand," Killian says, "but please know that is not what I want, I just needed us to start our life with no secrets between us." He gets up and offers her his hand.

Emma looks at him and takes his hand, letting him pull her to her feet. "I appreciate your honesty. I don't believe this changes anything, at least not for me. I'm disappointed, but I understand that was your life then and this will be your life now. I am going to choose to see the best in you, you are a good man that has made mistakes in his past. You are very good to the workers; a man that feels such empathy for those less fortunate cannot be a lost cause."

"Are you sure? I must insist you think it over, I would hate for you to leave me at the altar if you had a last minute change of heart like your cousin. I have some business back in town, before I go I will go check on Mr. Thomas and maybe check in with Archie on some things."

"I will not keep you any longer, and if you would like we can talk some more once you return," she says with a smile that lets him know her decision has already been made.

Killian returns her smile with one of his own and brings her hand that he is still holding to his lips for a gentle kiss, then he makes his way to the little hut Michael Thomas resides in. His knock greeted with a muffled come in.

"Good morning, Mr. Thomas. I hope you are feeling better," Killian says to the older man as he walks into the tiny room.

"I am, thanks to you and the lovely angel, Miss Emma." Mr. Thomas hesitates as he scrutinizes Killian. "Are you here to fire me, too? I have heard that you have fired most of the older workers." The thought that seems to linger in his mind is how much the younger man reminds him of his old boss, Brennan Booth.

"Of course not, actually I would like to offer you employment that may be safer for a man your age. As for the other older employees that have been let go, that was not on my order. Now about the employment, it will have to wait until you are completely healthy seeing as the lovely Miss Emma would sooner cut off my hand than let me encourage you to start working before you are truly healed from your injuries and sickness." Killian arched an eyebrow and grinned at the old man as he spoke. "I have some business back in town, upon my return I will surely get to the bottom of the firing of our older workers."

The man smiled as he saw Killian close the door shut on his way out. He truly had a remarkable likeness to Brennan Booth - and it was not just physical, he shared a good heart too.

Killian is finally away from the Booth Estate. He misses his simple life and yet all the eyes on him say his life will no longer be simple. It seems the rumors have not died out. The curious glances and the hushed whispers he keeps getting from the simple commoners to the rich and noble are an indication that it will not happen anytime soon.

He is walking towards his new office at Tiny's Golden Goose Tavern where his old friend has allowed him to rent one of the rooms as an office, at least until he finds something more suitable. He hopes Smee is in there assisting Archie as he was previously instructed to do so.

He walks in and greets his friend with a cordial nod then heads up the stairs to the modest room he is renting. He opens the door and is met by the sleeping forms of Smee and a couple of Tiny's workers. No doubt in his mind the men had entertained themselves the prior night with some libations from the bar.

"Rise and shine, you bilge rats! No offense, Mr. Smee," Killian says loudly, even though Smee does remind him of a rat from time to time.

The other men in the room scurry away, but Smee just stretches lazily as his chair shakes and rattles slightly out of balance. He sleepily replies, "None taken, Captain. For some reason, I keep dreaming of cheese."

Killian laughs at his first mate's comment, perhaps he had lived as a rat in a previous life. "Smee, there is no need to report on the town's gossip since I got the gist of it on my way here. Are you not going to congratulate your Captain? It appears I'm in the market for an engagement ring," Killian says as he shuffles some of the papers thrown on the desk.

"Sir, does the engagement ring be for Miss Milah?" Smee asks.

"Of course not! For my bride to be, Miss Emma Nolan," Killian answers as he tries not to lose his temper.

"I don't understand, sir, the plan was for you to get Miss Milah back, alongside the considerable Booth fortune," Smee tells his longtime boss.

"Are you questioning my actions, Mr. Smee?" Killian asks as he crowds the portly man and waits for a response.

"No, of course not sir, it's just... I cannot help but mention that you seemed different on my last visit to the Booth's. I believe it is because of her." Smee's voice gets higher and higher as he cowers from Killian's piercing glare.

"Smee, don't misunderstand my actions, it is all part of the ruse I have concocted in order for my plan to succeed. I'm only entering into this marriage to cover up the little dalliance I had with Milah so her rich new family will not be suspect of her misdeeds. You see if I'm part of the family, my presence will not be questioned or unwanted and in order for the plan to be successful, I have to act like I want to be a better man. Finally, if with my marriage to Emma, Milah is to experience half of what I felt on my return from Arendelle, then who am I to question my good luck? Milah hates her cousin and if my revenge is provided by her lovely cousin, I will allow it," Killian says as he looks around.

In the heat of the conversation, they both had missed Archie entering the room and subsequently overhearing their conversation. The look of disappointment on his face was enough of a warning to Killian of the lashing that was about to be directed at him. Killian clenched his jaw in frustration as he made his order known. "Smee, go get me something to eat from Tiny's kitchen and take your time. I have some things to discuss with Archie."

"Yes, sir," Smee scurried out of the room as fast as humanly possible.

"There was no need to dismiss him. I will just say this to you, Emma deserves better than to be used and lied to. She has a good heart and she seems to see the same thing in you as I do. She was devastated by August's actions and now you are using her too. Killian, don't you see how lucky you are?" Archie asks shaking his head.

"Are you going to tell her what you heard?" Killian asks. His stomach drops and he cannot admit to anyone, much less himself, that he cares so much more than he should.

"Killian, I should tell her so she can call off this wedding, but I won't. I will give you the chance to do the right thing, to do the honorable thing. I came to tell you that I had found a lovely house that would be perfect for you two. Mrs. Lucas is selling her home because of her deteriorating health, and since she will be moving in with her granddaughter, Ruby Whale, she has no need for the furniture. Earlier today I went to Dr. Whale's home to finalize the deal on your behalf and the house is available to move in as soon as possible," Archie says and looks at Killian as he waits for a response.

"Is there anything else you need to add?" Killian asks stubbornly. He hates seeing the disappointment on Archie's face, but he will not fold on this matter. He will marry Emma because she is the means to an end. Killian is back to feeling angry and he was a fool to ever think that he would ever be seen as anything other than the worthless, womanizing, selfish scoundrel that he will undoubtedly always be.

He will not give up Emma as she will surely lead him to his happy ending, whether he deserves it or not. He thought for a brief second that he could join her and be a part of something special but alas, that is not in the cards for him, at least not with someone like her. Milah, on the other hand, is someone like him, one of the worst humans around.

He doesn't deserve light, he only is worthy of darkness. The truth is, he lied to Smee, he said those words because Smee made him feel weak and not in control of his feelings. He had felt a shift in his core because of Emma, but he will not lie to himself and think that there is a possibility that she could possibly feel as he does. He will not be made a fool by another Nolan woman.

Emma finally walks into the house after regaining her composure. She understands who Killian Jones was and she knows who he can evolve into. She cannot deny the fact that she had been upset about his story but at the time he didn't owe her anything. She hopes that tidbit stays in the past.

She hears her name and turns to meet the source. "Good morning," Emma says to Cora, cordially.

"Good morning It seems congratulations are in order," Cora says.

"Oh?" Emma responds. "Your mother informed me of the upcoming nuptials between you and the Captain," Cora says.

"Let me guess, my mother came to you in hopes you would be able to talk me out of it," Emma says, rolling her eyes at her mother's antics.

"Yes, she did, but I will do no such thing. I'm actually happy you two are to wed. I can now relax, since I'm assuming the two of you will leave once you have married, and subsequently he will forget about whatever brought him here. Thank you, you are a savior," Cora says as she smiles and walks away.

Emma doesn't see the triumphant smile on Cora's face as she leaves her standing in the long hall, mulling over her actions. The only reason she is marrying Killian is to save her family, not because she sees a happy future with him.

Snow is walking aimlessly in her room and she glances out the window. Her daughter cannot marry that man. Earlier she had seen them interact outside among the flowers. It had been a highly romantic setting and she could not help but notice that there were no advances on his part.

She knew of his reputation with women and her fear was that he would not be able to show her daughter the respect she deserves.

Maybe she could agree to meet him and cautiously get to know him. She could request for Emma to not rush into the marriage. Emma has barely recovered from her previous heartbreak, and she is afraid of what could become of her Emma if this relationship fails as well.

She needs David to help her convince Emma to wait. Sadly, her daughter seems to be set on marrying soon. There is no time to lose, so she writes a quick message to David letting him know of the situation. She needs someone to go into town to deliver her message to Archie who will then send the telegraph to Arendelle. Her maids are gone, so the only option left is to send Enith and she seems to dislike taking orders from anyone that is not the lady of the house.

Snow calls for Enith who surprisingly quick to answer her call.

"Enith, I need to send you on an errand. Please take this to Mr. Hopper; he will know what to do. Oh, and you don't need to wait for a reply." Snow smiles warmly as she hands the letter to Enith sends her on her way with hopes there will be enough time to delay Emma's wedding.

Unfortunately, when Enith finally returns, it is to tell Snow that Archie has already left for Arendelle according to the man in the red hat. Snow thanks her and is left alone once more to ponder her next move.

Note: Thanks to everyone who is reading, commenting, reblogging and showing this story and I, so much love.

Tagging:

@hookedonapirate​​ @kmomof4​​ @searchingwardrobes​​ @seriouslyhooked​​​ @profdanglaisstuff​​​ @let-it-raines​​ @revanmeetra87​​​ @snowbellewells​​​ @hollyethecurious​​​ @kymbersmith-90​​ @branlovestowrite​​ @thejollyroger-writer​​​ @shireness-says​​ @ilovemesomekillianjones​​  @thisonesatellite​​​ @thesschesthair​​​ @winterbythesea​​ @stahlop​​​ @resident-of-storybrooke​​​  @superchocovian​​​  @lfh1226-linda​​​ @artistic-writer​​​ @thislassishooked​​​ @shardminds​​​ @winterbaby89​​​ @xhookswenchx​​​ @ultraluckycatnd​​​ @gingerchangeling​​​ @laschatzi​​​ @wellhellotragic​​​ @xemmaloveskillianx​​​ @courtorderedcake​​​ @pirateherokillian​​​ @optomisticgirl​​​ @darkcolinodonorgasm​​​ @sherlockianwhovian​​​ @andiirivera​​​ @djlbg​​​ @nikkiemms​​​ @jennjenn615​​​ @scientificapricot​​​ @officerrogers​​​ @imlaxdris71​​​ @therealstartraveller776​​​

[kinetic-elaboration]

September 18: 1x15 Shore Leave

Shore Leave tonight! Because I need it. I had a lot of thoughts on this because it’s so ridiculous and wonderful.

That planet looks like a giant green screen. Which is appropriate.

I could watch this back rub scene on a loop all day. Fellas, is it gay to want your First Officer to really dig it in there?

Captain going to his quarters to work from home today.

Oh-ho, what is this, the little seen Sulu & McCoy dynamic.

Plant nerd Sulu wants information on all the greenery.

That rabbit is so great. Fun fact I had an LJ icon with that rabbit back in the day.

Honestly this is such a great concept for an episode. Like I don’t have any really deep notes or feelings about it but both as a sci fi idea (a very high-tech ‘amusement planet’ that uses unseen machines that can read your thoughts to manufacture delightful things for you) and an entertaining yarn, it’s so good. I also think the characters are really on point.

It’s so good that Theodore Sturgeon could put that back rub scene in there and no one even noticed.

“Stardate.... something.....uh, point three.” I laughed, I really did. Stardates do not and never have made sense and I like that even Kirk is so tired at this point he’s like “yeah whatever.” Mood, Sir.

Kirk is canonically a workaholic. He’s the kind of guy who checks his email on vacation. Who answers emails at 11pm. With his husband next to him like to rest is to rest jim!!!

“On my planet, to rest is to rest.”

Kirk thinks he’s so cute. He’s looking really handsome today himself, but Kirk always looks at his best when he’s got his heart eyes face on.

“A crewman’s rights end where the ship’s safety begins.” We need that on a poster today in 2020 for Reasons.

Love how unamused Kirk is and how amused Spock is. Ya got played, son!

Oh, look, it’s a random gun. Too bad Chekov’s not here to claim it. (He’d love this planet btw.)

YFIP: Captain Kirk. Cancels shore leave mere minutes before it’s supposed to start.

Gunshots!! Sulu found the gun! And he’s so excited! And then Kirk takes it away like the Mean Dad he is.

One thing I wonder about this planet is at what point do the objects, people, etc. cease to exist. Do they just eventually wander back to the trapdoors and.... get recycled? Do they have this built in? Is that not... weird? Rosencrantz and Guildenstern: Shore Leave. And do the inanimate objects have to be returned?

I love this Kirk Academy back story and we were robbed--ROBBED--of it in AOS, fight me on this. “I was downright grim.” Bullied by an upperclassman?? Who liked playing dumbass pranks?? Sounds like enemies to lovers, slowburn, 20k, to me.

Love how absolutely deranged Finnegan is though.

Yeoman Barrows’ rape fantasy.

Kirk stops to a pick a flower! To romantic music!! He is so soft and I love him byeeeeeeeee.

And then the flower reminds him of his Academy girlfriend Ruth. Who is uh obviously played by a woman in her 30s and yet hasn’t aged a day in 15 years so 19 year old Kirk with an older lady y/y?

Love his confused face while she’s kissing him though.

He’s so dazed as he calls McCoy and then just kinda... gives up lol.

Bones, too busy flirting to remember the white rabbit he’s supposed to be chasing. Don’t say “a whole army of Don Juans”!!!

His eyeshadow is also on point today. He’s so shameless, trying to not-quite-watch her as she changes into the Princess Costume. No one ever remembers how flirty McCoy is but he IS.

Oh look, a big kitty!!! Very beautiful and nice.

Sulu lol, just casually thinking of samurai. Bet he wishes he still had that gun now.

Spock having a hard time beaming down reminds me of that meme “Now I will always be a child of two worlds.”

Spock’s thought process is hilarious. “Our transporters were about to stop working so I thought, hey, how about I strand myself too--just to be with you, Jim.”

McCoy and Barrows holding hands.

They’re supposed to spread out but Kirk and Spock go together obviously.

Oh no, the knight! I’m sure Kirk told Spock not to shoot bc he knew his phaser didn’t work but it still looks like ‘I got this baby.’

There’s no one to say “He’s dead Jim.” :(

Barrows shouldn’t feel guilty; it was Bones’s fault for conjuring the knight in the first place by saying the word “knight.”

Lol can’t Sulu run the tricorder? Like the obviousness with which they switch out Sulu and Spock so K and S can have their moment is... Something.

“Are you saying that this is a plant, Mr. Spock?”

Lol just poking the dummy in the face.

“Funny air vehicles.” Don’t have planes in the 24th century I guess?

Don’t say strafing run!!

When Kirk thinks of the Academy, he thinks of Finnegan first apparently. And now begins an incredibly long fight sequence. I actually like the TOS fights in general quite a bit because they’re SO choreographed. So for me they are more fun than fights now, which are such a mess I don’t even know what I’m looking at. But even so--this one is VERY long.

And VERY homoerotic.

“Jim baby.” “Sweet Jimmy boy.” Resting on top of that cliff in a ‘draw me like one of your French girls’ pose. Kirk’s shirt just like.... REALLY randomly ripping right the hell off.

“You couldn’t find your head with both hands.” ???

I love this Irish tune. Apparently this was the first ep this composer worked for and I think he did a really good job all around! I rarely notice music but I did in this one and always in a good way.

Spock’s makeup is great as usual. He and Kirk are on the same expository wavelength.

Spock, don’t say the word “tiger”! You can clearly see it is on a leash lol. Lots of gratuitous touching as Kirk and Spock run away. My mom and I agree that Spock liked the tiger, though. He does like cats and big animals like iChaya.

All the crewman line up except for Angela. Really dropping the ball there.

Love how the amusement park manager shows up just after Kirk told everyone not to think about anything. “Okay, who imagined the man in green robes?”

Spock’s posture and expression.... so good. He clearly loves the idea of an amusement park, and, given that he describes it as a place with “many fascinating things” to do/see, I think he would, canonically, love it.

“The more complex the mind, the greater need for the simplicity of play.”

 THE MUSIC WHEN MCCOY SHOWS UP WITH THE GIRLS OMG.

He’s such a slut. One whole love interest plus TWO imaginary showgirls? Tone it down Mister.

I can’t believe one of the girls goes to Spock. He’s like “What do I do with this?” Then hands her off to Sulu because Rodriguez is already helping Angela move on from her dead husband. So now Sulu gets two ladies.

Spock doesn’t need any more shore leave, because he got to spend some time with Kirk, solve a mystery, and see a tiger. That’s all the fun he needs!

The last scene was pretty unnecessary (except that I guess without it, it kinda looks like Kirk is just...leaving the Enterprise for his old girlfriend lol) but at least we get the awkward implication that Kirk, McCoy, and Sulu had a lot of sex, and some random fake laughter.

(Sulu absolutely canonically had a threesome.)

Next up is the Galileo Seven, a Classic TM Spock (and Spock & McCoy) episode.

[martynefrain-blog]

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So whats your favorite thing about each of your fe3h favs? Anything you could just go on a long rant about for any of them? or interactions between them that you wish had happened or wanted to happen.

Waking up in the morning and going through all of the drunk blogging and “-thank-u-for-weathering-my-deep-need-to-be-liked-and-given-attention-off-main-I-guess” if this isn’t a whole mood on its own I don’t know what is. Anyways it sounds like you had fun and it was definetly fun reading everything. I hope you are feeling okay the day after everything. And to tack on a random question which fe3h character would you want to get drunk with if it was just the two of you?

Hi Hello!! thank u for enjoying my drunk blogging !!! and for the asks!!! (and the lovely comments on my fics actually hi there ur wonderful!!!) i’m currently cursing the damage i’ve done to my sleep schedule and suffering under my (truly deserved) hangover lmao ;p apologies u don’t get drunk me, only uncaffeinated hangover me, but we talk to the same degree and make the same spelling errors lol

ah yes.. im a fountain of moods (all of u still with me here are saints hhhh)

ok content time:

the second one first: i absolutely want to get drunk with ferdinand von aegir. the man’s a hop, skip and a vodka shot away from a mess. i love him. he’d be full of conversation and would buy the rounds every time as a true nobleman should !! he’d probably be really good at instigating drinking games but horrible at playing them.. i love party gay ferdie von aegir.

i’m going to LIMIT the faves i list because truly i love them all very much but i have to at least pretend i have some restraint and i don’t want to make this even More of a wall of text it’s going to become . SO 

edit: ok i started writing this at like. half ten pm. when the fuck did it become monday. 

edit edit: Disclaimer time: these are my conclusions and my conclusions alone. I’m not saying I’m objectively right or correct. I’m very much approaching this from an English Lit-ish point of view because that’s just how I look at a lot of media. I’m not asserting my opinions or conclusions as the only viable to interpret this media, and if anything I say offends you then I am sorry, it was not my intention but I acknowledge that I have hurt you. This is not the exhaustive list of my thoughts on the whole thing, there’s a lot more depth and detail I didn’t go in to.

My favourite thing about Edelgard is the Everything, but notably I really love her proud nature and how in VW it quite directly gets her *spoilered*, and in CF it’s integral to her success (bc it’s her own rigidity within herself that keeps her standing i think) and I Like Tragic Characters (and it’s very elinor dashwood). because it’s one of the qualities that can throw her character into a villainous light & it’s really interesting !! but at the same time.. it’s not quite ‘pride’ purely, and it’s kinda the wrong word. it’s some mixture of determined/stubbon, anger, self-reliance, and that really hard veneer of personality u develop when you’re around people who aren’t healthy for you to be around, and the very very critical need to be right about the choices you made because the weight of the  consequences would kinda ruin you if you weren’t. (the dean winchester effect huh) and wrap that up together with a big scoop of ‘i believe my way is right’ (’and my way Has to be right’) and then u get a lot of what i LOVE about Edelgard’s character

My favourite thing about Dorothea is really how she was the character that Hated the war. genuinely the contrast between white clouds dorothea & timeskip dorothea Breaks My Heart EVery Time I See Her !!!!! that and Spoilers!!! (her last words in AM unrecruited is edelgards name and i literally had to stop and cry about it for five minutes.) she’s one of the characters that post-war doesn’t have a Massive political stake in the war - like there’s her anger towards the current class system (another reason i bloody love her PLEASE give me angry feminine characters) but i think it’s her bonds with edie (or byleth&whoever if recruited) that keep her actually fighting in the war & it’s kinda different and i like that (actually i think she parallels/sends up/contrasts really really nicely with mercedes in that way)

my favourite thing about Marianne is just everything. how she finds worth within herself if you play VW (and the very very harrowing hc that she didn’t if you don’t), how she’s full of a quiet rage for the crest system but you eek it out of her as you play the game. how she’s still loved by the deers despite her appalling mental health (fight me on that canon) and the game essentially has her ‘save’ herself by finding worth and life within herself. i love her so much ok. (i also love her because she committed identity theft.. she and i share a name with the second dashwood sister oho (but i don’t use that name on the internet hhh) (also because my favourite shakespeare play is king lear (no really it is), my birthday is in red wolf moon too, i used to have very long hair i wore in a plait most days for school, little 11 and 17 year old me acted Exactly like white clouds marianne did & genuinely i love marianne von edmund to pieces but God it hurts to see her in game sometimes bc her journey mirrors a lot of mine & i love this character. so much.) WOW that was a lot. am i sure im not still drunk

so claude is not only one of my favourite characters in the whole damn game, but also shares the name of one of my favourite painters so i simply have to love him ;p however i can’t give a proper opinion on him yet because i haven’t finished playing deers yet :( but !! i love how (as is with all the lords) he has a veneer of personality to him, but in contrast to Edie where it’s quite seemless with her actual personality, Claude’s veneer of personality seems very opaque and plastered on. i may or may not just be wildly imagining things but he’s a very different personality in his lower supports with Lysithea than he is in his B support with Marianne, for instance. like, i love characters that are obviously a lot more socially intelligent than i could ever be, and claude is *chef kiss* BEAUTIFUL ON EVERY LEVEL.

i’d wax lyrical about Ingrid too but honestly there’s many better people out there with the good ingrid content than i could do. shortly, i love the New Take on the pegasus knight archetype she brings, and i really like her perspective on femininity !!! she’s such a good character & she brings so much to the game and to the pegasus knight character too!!!!! she’s such a bright personality and altho i wish so many of her supports weren’t centred around make-up (hhh dorogrid fans i pray for you), i think she’s really going to pave the way for whoever’s next in that character slot. (like, you can’t tell me she’s not an offshoot of Phila from awakening lmao)

no ok i’m adding in Hubert because i love this vampire man. i really really love the devoted servant archetype and we all know i love edelgard’s tragedy. and i love hubert. so much. the way he enables edelgard in pretty much everything is just so so interesting to think about, and i love his intensity about it. he’s like the ever present reminder that edelgard’s will kinda has to work otherwise the potential consequences of her being wrong are personified in hubert imo. it’s only touched on in VW in his letter but like. god i wish we got more but it’s a wonderful starting block. i love his comic relief as well, he’s such a fun character to have !!!! and also i have so many hubert fics in my bookmarks that just Get him. i love hubert. oh i love hubert.

i’m going to cut myself off there because . that’s just a LOT. 

as for characters i would sell a limb to have them talk to each other, honestly it’s Edelgard/Marianne. (and only 51% because of all the projection i have going on with those two ok don’t at me i  k n o w). that support chain would be too powerful and honestly i wish they had one becuauese it would have gone so Hard about what Edelgard was doing and what Marianne thought about it, and how they connected over it & they probably would have had their supports set over cups of tea or smth .. it would have been amazing. 

(but i’d rather have nothing than an awakening-level-content support where they talk about eating fucking bear meat instead of talking about how they grew to trust each other with and their ability to save the fate of the world HUH AWAKENING. (i’m salty about fredrobin forever)

also hilda/dorothea supports . we were robbed. they’re best friends and you can’t actually tell me otherwise. they run the disaster bi chat of garreg mach. honestly i just would Love a support chain for them that starts with them talking about self care routines and something really small like accessories or perfume and it goes into how self-esteem and how dorothea has to find the same worth in herself as hilda so easily can. (hilda’s the queen of self esteem she’s a babe) and in CF they could have dialogue and then we cry about it. and in SS they talk about how they both chose their place with Byleth and not at edie/claude’s side like i’m just free balling here it could be Anything and i’d love it. 

also big shocker .. dorothea/marianne supports . they both hate themselves in their profile CAN THEY PLEASE CHAT. 

also i accidentally fell in love with the claude/edelgard ship and i desperately need them to interact on the same level that edie and dimitri get to because.. aren’t there supposed to be three main characters huh intsys .. and like i get what the game goes for with two of the lords embroiled in a personal war against each other at the heart and the third actually finding something close to the truth because he’s not involved in age old grudge matches but at the same time That’s one of the things that really really falls flat for me in the game. dimitri’s villain is edie, edie’s villain is big dragon wife, claude’s villain is the lack of communication that everyone in fodlan suffers from apparently. lack of communication and lies. ymmv with what im saying rn but i would have preferred if all three lords had strong personal ties to each other and in Each Route it was brought up. or just snip dimitri’s dialogue out of CF because i have beef with how that WHOLE moment went down on so many accounts hhhh honestly it makes me angerey to think about lol

.. back on topic- can the lords pls talk to each other because it would be SO interesting in white clouds and i like seeing how their personality presentations clash

also . can i marry manuela yet. my crops are dying here.

.. im so sorry about this but it’s midnight and i’m too tired to edit so. have this. thank you so much for the questions!!!! very kind (and brave) of you to ask me!!!!! i had a lot of fun writing all of this & as always if anything you didn’t quite /get/ i’m happy to re-explain myself!! :)