#'I think I may like-like my best friend' support group
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nct jisung oneshot
request for anon: you have a kid without your highschool boyfriend ever finding out. sorry this request took a long while my life has been so insane lately that I haven’t had time to do much of anything besides work. Anyways enjoy ✨
warnings/headsup: light swearing • teen pregnancy • tiny bit of angst • major fluff fest • 7.8k words • female reader • light proofread • Jisung x reader kiss • melodrama • crisp autumn vibes • dad!jisung • D/N = daughters name • miscommunication • so much cheesiness
Moving On: Jisung x Reader pt. I/I
High school was a complicated time for Jisung. He was managing school, keeping up with friends, dealing with his overbearing family, and a slew of extracurriculars, all while making sure to pay attention to you; his girlfriend. Sometimes it all felt like too much, sometimes he felt like he should just quit. Nevertheless, you were always there to support him. You were constantly by his side and that’s what really mattered. Whether it was bringing him snacks in between classes, helping him study during free periods, waiting for him at the dance studio while he practiced, or just being a shoulder to lean on and a safe space to vent whenever he may have needed it you were there... Jisung couldn’t even express how grateful he was for having you around! Even with all his appreciation and love for you however, he still wasn’t aware of just how far you were expending yourself to keep him happy and healthy.
People often joked about just how close you two were, how you were like second mother to Jisung and his entire friend group, the way you were always ready and able to give them rides and take care of Jisung and all the people important to him. Jisung’s mother would have probably said the opposite. Though she was never overt about it you know she didn’t like you. She would scowl whenever Jisung left you two alone together and the smile she forced on her face whenever he brought you home was just about the fakest thing you’d ever seen. Jisung always tried his best to talk you up to his parents, but where his mother was stubborn and resentful, his father was uninterested and indifferent. He didn’t want to believe that the people that had raised him couldn’t see in you what he saw, it pained him to think about so he just didn’t. He was in complete denial most times about the relationship between your two families and the fact that you came from much lower economic means didn’t help your case. When he first pitched the idea of you being his girlfriend to his mom and dad that was the very first thing they pointed out in fact! That didn’t stop him however. He would just tell himself that they were overly protective and that you and his mom were actually quite similar. You two would have to get along at some point… at least he hoped you would…
Jisung almost never failed to point out your motherly instincts: to protect him from bad news, to make sure he excelled in everything he did, to simply keep his head afloat. Unfortunately, no one knew just how that instinct would eventually have to develop. For better or for worse that instinct might have just been the end of the life you were once so used to.
It was late spring when you started noticing a bizarre sense of dread in the air as the reality started to set in for everybody that lives were starting to shift and change, and relationships were experiencing a much different sort of ebb and flow. No wonder you felt a little sick, it was the dread in the air! Right?
Sometimes your period was late… but it was never this late... You had no idea what you were supposed to do in a moment like this! A wave of anxiety washed over you and your body as you began to feel queasy. You felt nauseous, and even a fair amount afraid. This might have been the absolute worst time in your life for something like this to happen! You were so close to wrapping up high school. Senior year was supposed to be the last year of you and your peers lives before becoming "real" adults. You were deciding which university to go to and what subjects to major in. You were getting ready to say goodbye to friends and unfortunately hadn’t yet had the sit down talk with your boyfriend about if he was comfortable going long distance or even staying together at all…
You loved Jisung, you really did, but you also loved the idea of a bit of freedom. You would never explicitly say that to him for fear of hurting him or just sounding like you wanted to complain, but you were tired. Tired of being so busy, tired of so many people depending on you, tired of always being referred to as Park Jisung’s girlfriend, tired of his family looking down on you and yours. You honestly thought that most people had forgotten your name at this point. You wanted something of your own, something to explore outside of and away from Jisung, however sweet he was. You thought that college might be time for a change! A chance to reinvent yourself apart from your high school boyfriend and the hovering hand of his mother. No matter how lovely and accomplished he was, you two couldn’t be together forever right? At least that’s what you told yourself. You thought of your parents, you thought of Jisung’s parents. You were sure that if the Park family didn’t already detest you they surely would now. You dreaded what two little lines on a flimsy piece of plastic might mean for all of that. His parents already thought of you as unsophisticated, a burden to Jisung’s future and this would not help your case. You knew you had to tell Jisung while he was still around but you just didn’t know how… but first you had to be sure what you were planning on telling him.
You sat on the cold porcelain of the toilet seat all alone but face still flushed with warmth from embarrassment. You got up and washed your hands and gave yourself a once over in the mirror. You barely recognized your own visage. The bags under your eyes had bags, and the dark circles looked more like new permanent attachments than temporary indications of sleepiness. You subconsciously prayed to whatever god was out there that your period was just late again this time. “It’s just two or three weeks” you told yourself looking back to your reflection in your bathroom mirror and plastering on your best cheery smile. It only lasted a moment but for a fragment of a fragment of a second you were almost smiling genuinely no matter the result.
You went and did a quick lap around your house to release as much pent up stressful energy as possible but also to make sure your parents really were out of the house. You peeked out through the living room curtains one last time just making sure that there were no cars other than your own parked in the driveway. You ran back up the stairs as soon as you heard the faint ringing of the alarm you had set on your phone. You couldn’t stop the trembling of your hands as you picked up the little pink and white pregnancy test you had set on the edge of the counter. You sucked in a deep breath, inhaling sharply through your nose as the sheer terror and excitement of what you were looking at created a blockade in your throat. You felt a tingling sensation all over, unable to properly breathe, only sucking in air for another few seconds before finally letting out your first breath in what felt like several minutes.
Although, it wasn’t just any regular breath, it was a laugh. Well less of a laugh and more or a low groan that slowly turned into a chortle. You practically keeled over as you fell to the ground on your hands and knees, stomach and back heaving as sloppy tears fell down on the sides of your face and almost splashed back into your eyes with the velocity at which they hit the tiled floor. You didn’t know what your reaction would be once you looked at the test but you definitely did not expect this! You were so afraid before, so worried, so adamant that you wanted, needed it to be negative! Now here you were staring at the two thin lines on the near microscopic test screen indicating a positive result and all you could think of was how you hope’d it’d be a girl.
𖦹
“So I have good news and I have bad news” you whispered to Jisung as you two sat in the back of the school library “do you want to hear the good news or the bad news first”?
“Uhm I don’t know… I guess the bad news” he said.
You screamed internally, wondering why he just had to choose the bad option first. Jisung rifled through several books struggling to pick one for a final paper, paying you little mind as he laced his fingers through yours absentmindedly and dragged you down each aisle of bookshelves behind him.
It had been about a day or two since you had taken the test and you had even talked it over with your parents. They were understandably uneasy at first when you said you planned on keeping the child but you assured them that you would absolutely keep working on your studies. You told them you would talk to Jisung yourself and figure out the rest from there, and all your parents could do was support you and whatever decisions you made, the best they possibly could. They could see the stress in your eyes as you mentioned next steps. Though your parents supported your relationship they weren’t too fond of Jisung’s family either. The pretentious nature and lack of grace when talking about their son’s girlfriend, your parent’s daughter, it made them upset to say the least. The thought of having to join your two families was the last thing they wanted to think about right now. You explained to them in detail exactly how you wanted to move forward with your life and what you planned on telling your boyfriend in the process. “Just let him down easy” your mother said, knowing how difficult of a conversation this would be, especially to have so young “don’t tell his mom… tell him.” Your mother’s voice was emotional and awkward and your dad gave you a half hearted smile and stiff hug. Their words rang in your head as you looked up at Jisung.
“Are you sure you want to hear the bad news first?” You asked, hoping that if you told him the good news was that you were pregnant, he would already be on board to end the relationship and you wouldn’t have to say what you had to say next and his mom would never have to be proven right about how messy she thought you were.
“No I want to hear the bad stuff first and just get it over with” he said reaching over you with ease to grab a book off the highest shelf. “Hey do you think this would work?” He clicked his tongue paging through whatever novel he had picked up this time.
You sighed… “okay but it’s really important so I need you to really listen!”
Jisung continued checking out books and only really half listening to you. “Of course” he said as he carried on skimming all the literature around him.
“Jisung I’m serious! I didn’t want to do this here but this is the first time we’ve been alone together all week!”
“Totally…” he responded
“Jisung look at me!”
“I am looking at you…” (he wasn’t). He kissed your hand tenderly, muttering the words on the page he was looking at to himself.
“Jisung!”
“What babe?”
His nonchalance angered you. Couldn’t he tell how upsetting this was for you? “Jisung I want to break up!” You swore you could hear a pin drop on the complete opposite side of the library. You felt like your heart was going to jump out of your chest in the time it took for Jisung to fully absorb what you had said. Those few seconds felt like an eternity, but once they were over you already wanted to go back to before you had said anything.
“You’re joking…” he said, actively scoffing in your face.
What ensued was potentially the first and only ever argument between you and your then, now ex boyfriend. All you really remembered was how he kept asking "why". You told him all the little reasons, how you wanted space, how you couldn’t do long distance, how your families would never get along, but you omitted the most important reason... Sure those other things were true but you also just couldn’t see yourself raising a child with the first guy you had ever slept with, and Jisung had so much going for him, you knew there was no way a dance career could have him stationed in one place long enough to focus on a new family. His mother would never let him have a kid with you, you just knew it! She would think you were trapping him, his father would question you incessantly, and Jisung would eventually have to choose between his prospective future or yours. So you decided to choose for him.
“So we’re just over then” his voice was hoarse and defeated “you don’t want to see me again”…
All you could do was nod “this one should work well, it fits all the criteria for the paper”. You said, handing Jisung a hefty book of the shelf, helping him for seemingly the last time…
You couldn’t completely avoid Jisung the last few weeks of school. You both had sort of silently agreed to keep as much distance as possible, only speaking to each other when absolutely necessary. When people asked why you two had broken up you both had slightly different answers but they both went along the lines of “growing apart.” It really hurt to think about, especially all that was left unsaid but you simply had to trudge forward. The last time you saw Jisung was at graduation where you each exchanged a friendly yet faintly sour handshake and wished each other good luck. You watched the smug smile on his mother’s face as you two parted ways and the way she turned up her nose when your dad foolishly went in for a cordial handshake.
You sort of regretted not telling him about your ‘situation’ but you also felt like it was for the best! You thought you might never see him again and once your daughter D/N was born nothing else mattered. You put off school for a bit, moved to a new town and got very used to living alone with just you and your little girl. You put all your best skills to use once you had entered university. All your experience planning, keeping others organized, staying on task, and being a mother really lended itself to your field and your incredible business acumen was undeniable. You worked hard to make sure that you and your daughter could live in the best house, afford the nicest dinners, get the very best babysitters, and whatever else would make the little one’s life easier.
Obviously you still thought about him. Every time you looked at your child’s face you saw him. Every laugh, every cough and sneeze, every silly statement, every whine just reminded you of him. She never asked about her father but you wondered if she would eventually start. You sort of did want her to meet Jisung but your life had changed so much since, you wondered if after all these years if he would even care. You weren’t immune to looking him up every now and then or asking your parents if they had heard any news about him or his family. You suspected he would be angry or hurt if he found out, and he had every right to be. Despite that though, you still just wanted to see him again, even if it was just to yell at you for lying or cuss you out, even for just a brief moment you wanted to see him…
𖦹
“There’s no way… there’s no way…” Jisung muttered to himself slowly bringing his shopping cart to a halt and planting his feet firmly in the middle of the aisle. People gave him dirty looks and confused stares. He stood there, oblivious, only focused on a woman about his age, a woman he’d recognize anywhere even from a hundred feet away, a woman who nearly shattered his heart into a million pieces and broke up with him before moving across the country and becoming the most successful person from their high school by a mile. It couldn’t be, or rather it shouldn’t be!
What were you doing back in your home town? He wondered. The last he had heard you graduated college with about a million academic achievements under your belt, and were making more money than he could ever dream of at some big conglomerate. Though there you were, same put together appearance, same pretty face, same sweet voice, bending over to talk to a little girl who looked just like you. He did a double take, rubbing his eyes underneath his glasses just to make sure he was really seeing what he thought he was seeing. He squinted and blinked and did just about everything he could to clear his vision but nothing changed. All he saw was you.
He felt like he had to say something… if he didn’t he thought he might go insane. What kind of guy would he be to just ignore your presence. Sure you two hadn’t ended things on the best note but that was years ago, and you were just kids at the time! Maybe you’d forgiven him at this point. At one point Jisung wasn’t sure if all the resentment he once held for you was gone but seeing you in person just confirmed that it was. There was no reason to be mad anymore. He really missed you. He just wanted to talk to you again…
Was it really you standing there? The child didn’t look that old but was she really yours? Had you moved on so quickly after leaving town, after leaving him? Who were you with now? His head was spinning like a freshly oiled revolving door and full to the brim flooded with questions.
Jisung felt like his stomach did a 360 degree flip as he tepidly approached you. “Y/N” he stated more than asked hoping but already knowing it was you. Though, in case he was wrong he braced himself for a much more awkward encounter.
You almost dropped the can of food you were holding blinking rapidly and registering the person before you. “Jisung?” You said, giving him a once over. He was somehow even taller now with jet black hair and dark thick rimmed glasses slightly covering his tired brown eyes. He was as cute as ever. There he stood looking pretty much the same as he did when you left, but boy was he handsome!
“Jisung what’re you doing here?” You asked out of impulse, already knowing the answer. You acted like you hadn’t heard he was in town from your mother who ran into his folks a couple weeks ago, who proceeded to unabashedly brag about their son to her. Of course you then immediately went and stalked him on social media.
“I- I came back recently for a family reunion…” his face was a bit strained as he said it and then he trailed off, noticing the little girl who shyly held your hand once more. Up close she looked ever more like you, down to the way she looked him up and down and examined him with curious eyes. She stared without a shred of recognition on her face or in her eyes but still refused to break eye contact with the strange adult towering over her. He also couldn’t help but notice the way her cheeks rounded out the same way his did as a child and how her face transitioned into the same confused expression he made, mirroring him perfectly.
“What are you doing here?” He said trying his best to look at you and to not stare back at the little girl clinging to your side examining him like a foreign creature trapped behind bars at the zoo.
“I’m visiting my parents” you said clearing your throat a bit “with my daughter.” You raised her little hand trying to make her wave.
“How old is she?” He asked, mentally doing the math of just how long ago you two broke up.
“She’s five…” you said bashfully. You tried to run every possible scenario in your head about what the best course of action would be in this moment. Was it selfish to just keep the information to yourself, or was it better to just tell him now. Maybe the grocery store wasn’t the best place to let Jisung know that you’ve sort of been hiding a secret daughter from him for the past five years, but also the longer you hid it from him the worse you felt. You had to tell him, it really felt like now or never. You had kept her from him for so long it just felt cruel at this point. Plus, even though your daughter was young the way she eyed Jisung up and down made you feel paranoid enough that she had already figured it out herself. Maybe Jisung already knew too, maybe he wanted nothing to do with you or more importantly with her, but you still had to tell him. The words had to come out of your own mouth whether you wanted to speak them or not! You had to make up for the immature decision you made at that time. It was like you were in that library all over again...
“Hey do you want to meet up- I mean we should probably talk, it’s been a long time”. You fumbled over your words not sure exactly what to say.
Jisung perked up “I’m free tomorrow. If you wanna grab coffee!” He was happy you took the initiative to invite him out because god knows he didn’t have the courage to do it himself.
“That sounds... nice!” you said as the little girl tugged on your arm mumbling something about wanting to watch some tv show at grandma and grandpa’s.
“I assume your number’s still the same.” He said remembering all the times he meant to text you but stopped himself out of fear.
“Yeah it is.” You said. You felt the same giddy feeling you got on the first day of high school when a cute boy in your homeroom asked for your number for “study purposes.” There was that cute boy once again standing in front of you giving you the same smile he gave you when you first met. A smile you hadn’t seen in years, but healed a hurt you didn’t know you had inside instantly.
You had to chew on your cheeks to hide your smile as you drove home. You could see your daughter in the rear view mirror drumming her little fingers on the arm rest of her car seat along to the music on the radio. You would peek at her every once in a while and try to gauge her focus. What was she thinking about? Was she afraid of him? Was she curious about him? Did she even care?
You cleared your throat only half getting her attention as she sang along to the words of whatever song was playing, mostly making up her own lyrics and swaying in her seat. “So what did you think of mommy’s friend?” You asked.
She didn’t respond for a bit or even give you any indication that she heard you. She was silent for a few minutes before speaking. “He’s nice… but… too tall…” she said.
“You might be tall like that one day” you chuckled “would you ever want to meet him again?” You wanted to at least have an idea of what to tell Jisung when you saw him next. In your mind, your daughter’s opinion (though still young and uninformed) mattered the most. If she wanted nothing to do with him at this time it didn’t matter what Jisung’s response was. All that mattered was her and what her needs were.
“Is he good at playing games?” She added out of the blue.
“What?”
“Mommy’s friend... Is he good at playing games?”
“Uhm, I guess so? From what I remember he was always fun. I’m sure he’d be good at playing games.” You smiled at her through the rear view mirror a little “Why D/N? Did you want to play a game with him?”
Your daughter just looked out the window and nodded her head, soon after getting distracted. “When are we getting home? I wanna watch my show.” She huffed and grumbled almost like an adult. Almost like Jisung.
“Soon.” You said.
As you pulled into the driveway and walked into your parent’s house, your daughter was practically vibrating with energy. She practically dove out of the car as you unbuckled her seatbelt, running into the home as your mother opened the door and greeted her with a big hug.
“How was the store?” Your mother asked as she ushered your little one down the hall to go bother your father in the living room.
“It was alright… I ran into Jisung…” you walked over to the kitchen and placed a few shopping bags on the counter.
Your mother looked surprised “both of you?”
You sighed “both of us.”
“What did he say?”
“He asked to grab coffee, he actually seemed happy to see me!”
“Were you happy to see him?” Your mother asked.
“Of course I was! It was awkward but I have to tell him sooner or later. Whether he wants to be in her life or not I have to tell him.”
“-and you think the best way to do that is over coffee?”
“No!” You said. “But I might not have another chance.”
Your mother looked at you with this awkward guilty expression on her face. She started to unpack the groceries biting her lip and looking everywhere but into your eyes.
“What? Do you really think it’s that bad of an idea?”… there was silence as she opened the fridge and began to rearrange some condiments, suspiciously shaking her head as if to neither completely agree or disagree. “You think I should keep it from him? Mom it's been long enough, it would just be wrong to not tell him. D/N wants to meet him! Why are you being so weird about this? Aren’t you the one who told me I should tell him the next time I see him?”
“What if he already knows?” Your mother blurted out.
“So what if he already knows…” you furrowed your eyebrows “wait… what do you mean?”
“Nothing” your mother said.
You knew that was bullshit. “Did you tell him?” You asked in a frustrated tone. “You told him didn’t you—”
Your mother looked at you and then went back to avoiding your fiery gaze. She was never good at keeping secrets but you thought something of this magnitude would be able to stay hidden. She promised to let you tell him on your own terms, so why had she betrayed you?
It took her a while to fess up but eventually she did, sort of… “I didn’t tell him directly, it just sort of slipped out… I— I just had to say something she was so… ugh!” Your mother groaned.
“What the hell are you talking about?” You asked and took a deep breath. Your mother swallowed harshly and looked down at the floor. “I promise to hear you out, I just want to know what I’m getting into mom.”
“It was around last month… Your dad has been golfing so much lately, so he got us a membership to the country club with the money you gave him for his birthday. I don’t personally use it much but he loves it down there, and I like to use the pool, and the tennis court is nice, and every once in a while I like to just sit in one of the dining rooms with a glass of wine, and…”
You sucked in your cheek as your mom rambled knowing that she couldn’t avoid the point forever. “Yeah exactly.” You said dryly.
Your mother gulped once more “To make a long story just a bit shorter… The Park family also goes there and I ran into Jisung’s mother, and she was just bragging about him nonstop and she hinted that he was better off without you and I just remembered how much you loved that boy! She was talking about some date he went on and how great this girl was. Greater than my daughter? I doubt it! She thought her son could do no wrong! That he was so perfect and you were so not… I just couldn’t help but tell her that whether she liked it or not you two would always be connected! I- I looked at her and I said ‘ya know you may want to let your son know that you already have a granddaughter and she’s not related to that rich heiress you want him with so bad!’ That’s what I said to her for looking down on us all these years… I told her about how my daughter and my daughter’s daughter were just about the most wonderful thing in this world and she had no right to talk about you or even her own son that way.”
“You really said all that stuff?”
“Yes…” Your mother replied hesitantly.
You could feel the tears welling up in your eyes and a swell of emotion inside you. You put a hand over your mouth to stop the audible sobbing that threatened to leave your mouth. You could tell just how long your mother had been holding in those words. She was always so non confrontational but the fact that she said all that warmed your heart. You were angry at first but in this moment you realized that it didn’t matter what Mrs. Park or even your ex boyfriend thought of you. You had some choice words for Jisung’s parents as well but you knew it would create more trouble to let them out. All that mattered was that your mother loved you guys enough to be proud of you. You always felt a bit embarrassed when having to explain to others that you weren’t the babysitter you were just a teen mom, but your own mother didn’t even care. She loved you all the same and made sure that no one would let you feel ashamed of yourself. “I should’ve known you couldn’t keep a secret anyways.” You said choking up a bit. You gave your mother the biggest hug you had probably ever given in your entire life, and she hugged you right back!
“You aren’t angry?” She asked.
“Oh I’m furious” you said “but not at you. I have no idea what I did to make that woman hate me so much but I’m glad you stood up to her!”
Your mother sighed. “I know you wanted to do it on your own terms but I feel like she might’ve already told him… I just don’t know for sure.”
“It’s alright.” You said. You and your mother finished unloading the groceries, tearfully laughing at how strange the whole encounter must have been. The thought of your soft-spoken mother raising her voice at a stern and snarky lady filled you with joy. Just imagining the shocked look on Jisung’s mom’s face was enough to keep a slight smile on yours for the rest of the day.
Later that night, after putting D/N to bed, you sat on the couch with your parents commiserating about all the awful experiences you had with the Park family over the years. It had been pent up for so long that all of you took the opportunity to air out even the smallest of grievances.
“I don’t know how such a sweet kid could be related to such obnoxious people” your father said as a small ping emanated from your phone.
You couldn’t stop the butterflies in your stomach as you saw the first text from Jisung in half a decade appear before you.
“Wanna grab that coffee around noon tmrw?” It said.
You considered being coy and waiting a few more minutes to reply but your fingers worked faster than your brain. Before you knew it a “sure!” was sent in response.
Then there was one more ping. One more text. It was small. It was innocuous. It could have meant nothing. But to you, it meant everything. It was one small red heart, one little emoticon that hinted to you that he still might feel the same…
𖦹
The next morning was an early one for you. You spent hours perfecting the exact right image that would make you look good enough to go on what was essentially a date, but not so good that Jisung would immediately clock that you two were on a date. Sure meeting up with an old fling to talk about a secret child over coffee wasn’t the most romantic premise, but you couldn’t help but want to put your best foot forward when it came to him. It was almost shameful to admit internally how much you felt for him, but it was the honest truth. You still loved him.
The ding of the coffee shop door seemed to ring out like a chorus of hollow bell chimes in your ears as your head began spinning. Jisung was sitting at table to the far end of the cafe. You could see the rays of somber light peeking in through the window, diffused by the dusty oranges, reds, and browns of the fall leaves. Jisung fidgeted in his chair looking down at the table, and then his watch, then his phone, and back to the table. Two brown paper cups stood tall on the table in front of him, steam rising from them and collecting on the lenses of his glasses. He cracked his knuckles and gnawed at his fingernails nervously until finally catching a glimpse of you walking towards him. “Y/N” he exclaimed, clumsily getting to his feet and lightly tripping over a leg of his chair.
You tried your best to hold back laughter as he bumbled around, rushing to pull out a chair for you. You smiled and thanked him as you sat down. The rich pungent smell of freshly ground coffee beans and sweet steamed milk filled your nostrils and Jisung gently pushed one cup over to you.
“I assumed you still drank the same coffee. If that’s okay.” He cleared his throat hesitantly.
You could just about burst into tears at this very moment. After all these years he still remembered your coffee order. He was only missing one thing...
“Wait just a second…” he fumbled through his pockets for a moment and pulled out two small packets of sweetener. “I know you like to stir in your own sugar” he said.
Now it was perfect!
“Did you sleep okay?” He asked.
Jisung’s consideration for others, you in particular was always so evident. It’s like he couldn’t stop himself from making the kind of small talk that involved checking in on people. “I did.” You replied.
The two of you spent some time just sitting and catching up. You talked about school, work, old friends, tv shows, and just about everything you two would have talked about and experienced together had you been in contact for the past five and a half years. You didn’t really realize when, but the both of you had slowly transitioned to taking your coffee shop 'date' outside of the coffee shop and made your way to the park across the street. The air was cool and refreshing and Jisung couldn’t bring himself to say it out loud but the way you were bundled up with your scarf, gloved hands clutching your coffee like it might run away from you if you let it go was adorable. He also took not of how your coats subtly matched. Yours a light brown, and his a deep tan color made you two look complimentary, almost like a couple… almost.
“Did your daughter make it in time to watch her show?” He asked out of the blue.
You chuckled “You remembered that? She did actually. She even talked about you a bit after… before she went to bed she asked if I was meeting up with you soon.”
“No way!” He said and bumped your shoulder lightly with his coffee cup.
“Really I mean it! She’s so interested in what I do. She always asks about my friends.”
“Are we still friends?”
Your eyes went wide, your hands tensed up and a chill ran down your spine. “I mean- We were good friends at one point!” You choked on your words not knowing what to say.
“We were more than just good friends Y/N” he said.
“I know…”
Jisung bit his lip and you both looked at each other sheepishly, you caught his gaze and he caught yours before you both broke out into a fit of laughter. You two as a pair had a way of bringing out a silliness within yourselves that had you cackling like hyenas together but looking like absolute madmen to any onlookers passing by.
Your walk in the park was peaceful and comforting. So comforting in fact that you had almost forgotten why you wanted to meet up with him in the first place.
𖦹
“So what was the good news?” He said, taking a sip of his drink.
“What?”
“The good news! Remember before we broke up you said there was good news and bad news… the bad news was the break up and the good news was…” he giggled awkwardly “well I never got to find out���.
Why now of all times did he have to bring that up? What could you even say? You couldn’t run, you couldn’t hunker down somewhere and hide. You had to talk to him. It was now or never.
“Yeah about that… the good news was mostly good news for me”. You were internally facepalming at your high school self’s method of delivery when it came to something so important. ‘Good news and bad news’, how idiotic could you have been.
“That’s okay, I still want to know-” Jisung gently placed your hand in his, picking it up to wrap your fingers within his warm grasp. He knew it might be wrong but he really didn’t want to ask about your relationship status right now. “I was obsessed with everything you did back then, that part of me still really wants to know… Like would it have changed anything? I know that sounds stupid but it’s true…”
You couldn’t help but melt a little being in his hold once again. It lulled you in a way that made you forget the gravity of what you were about to abruptly spit out. “The good news was D/N”! You felt a lump form in your throat and you were jolted back a bit as Jisung stood there frozen in the midst of the cobblestone path. You immediately went into panic mode. Why wasn’t he saying anything? “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier, it just felt like the right thing to do at the time and my parents pretty much told me to do whatever I thought was best! I didn’t want to push something so big on you right before graduation” You rambled on and on watching as Jisung seemed to only take in bits and pieces of what you were saying. Still you weren’t sure if he was buying your excuses or if they were going in one ear and out the other. He continued to just stand there stiff as a board tightening his hand around yours as you tried to usher him to a bench to sit down. It took a few minutes, but eventually you two found a quieter more private area of the park to talk it out. Jisung mostly sat and listened to you explain your reasoning for keeping D/N a secret from him for so long but he also acknowledged how this wasn’t information he would have wanted to receive any other way than in person and face to face.
He had always wanted to hear something like this from you but he always imagined it was going to be far in the future after you guys got married. Jisung’s thumb lightly caressed your knuckles and you thought your fingers might go numb from the prolonged hand holding. He looked down at your hand and as quiet as a mouse he laughed.
He laughed… Right there on the bench as the cool breeze swept his hair out of his eyes, he laughed. He slowly met your worried gaze, tears pooling at the corners of his eyes just as they did in yours. “Of course you went on to have the perfect life and be the perfect mother all without me.”
His words caught you off guard “Perfect? I’m like a mess ninety percent of the time, I just keep it together in front of my daughter.” You sniffled a bit “I did- I mean I still do want you to be in her life, it would be good for her…”
“Just for her” he asked playfully, tears still welling in his eyes.
“...and for me…” you looked down at the ground.
“Would your boyfriend be okay with that?”
“Boyfriend?” You felt the embarrassment return to you. “I haven’t dated anyone since you and I-” you could barely finish your sentence before Jisung’s lips were crashing into yours. His hot breath made the hairs on the back of your neck stand on edge. His eyelashes gingerly brushed against your cheeks as he caught his breath. Exhaling through his nose he went back for more. Maybe it was because it had been so long, maybe it was because he was older and more experienced, but Jisung had never kissed you like this before. There was quiet desperation in the way your lips melded together as if he was asking you, begging you to be his again.
“Me neither” he said breathlessly finally letting you come up for air.
“I thought you had a girlfriend?”
“No way, I haven’t gone on a real date since I started college…”
“But your mother said-“
“My mother has been trying to set me up with some girl whose parents own a couple buildings downtown for ages now.” Jisung cupped your cheek affectionately. “She seems nice and all but it’s hard to go out with anyone else when all I do is think about you!”
“I think about you too.” You treasured the way such simple touches and matter of fact words could flip your worlds upside down. “I wish I had told you sooner… I really wish I told you so much earlier…” You really couldn’t stop the tears from flowing now. You imagined just how crazy you looked crying on a public bench. “One second” you said reaching into your purse and pulling out a few tissues and some baby wipes. You lightly dabbed at the corners of Jisung’s eyes.
He reached over to you and used his thumbs to wipes your face simultaneously. “You’re such a mom.” He joked.
“I don’t understand how you aren’t mad at me right now?” you said.
Maybe he should have been, you wouldn’t have held it against him if he was. “Being with you is the only thing I’ve ever wanted. If that makes me crazy then so what. I’m crazy about you.”
It was hard to hide the shock on your face, you couldn’t believe he had just outright confessed his feelings to you before you even had time to process that wonderfully unexpected kiss.
“Anyways, it’s a relief that D/N is mine. If you had a kid with some other guy I don’t know what I’d do…” he planted another small kiss on your forehead.
“I think your parents would have been elated…” you trailed off.
“Who cares what my parents think! We’re not in highschool anymore!”
You couldn’t help but smile.
“I always knew we were meant to be family, it doesn’t matter how long it took. Just never keep a secret like that from me again” he laughed.
“I promise it’s all honesty from now on” you replied as Jisung pulled you into a warm embrace. He brought your body closer to his, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as you two took in the autumn scenery.
𖦹
It took a few weeks of coordinating but Jisung had finally come up to visit you in your home in the city. D/N was probably more excited than you. Your last couple days back at your parent's were spent watching Jisung play with your (now his) daughter in your parents living room. He seemed to have lived up to all her expectations and she had gotten over her qualms with his height one she realized how high up she could sit when on his shoulders.
You still hadn’t told her he was her father. You and Jisung agreed to wait to tell her until you two were more established. Sure you had dated before but this was now a whole new relationship. Your daughter practically leaped from her spot on the couch once she heard the doorbell ring and her dad’s signature tepid knock on the door.
You opened the door to see your boyfriend’s smiling face as he reached down to pick up D/N as she peppered him with questions. “Hey you!” He said nuzzling her nose and leaning over to give you a kiss as your daughter winced in disgust. He lugged in a large rolling suitcase with his one free hand as you ushered him through the front entrance.
“That’s all you brought?” You asked.
Jisung nodded “yeah for now… I was so eager to get over here that I only packed the essentials, I didn’t want to overwhelm you with all my stuff at once.”
“Please Jisung you’re getting ready to move in. You’re going to overwhelm me anyways” you teased.
“I’ll get the rest later! Right now I just want to hang out with you guys!” He put your daughter down and ruffled her hair. “So are you going to give me a tour?” He said leaning down to talk to her at eye level.
She just wordlessly dragged his wrist along to show him all her favorite spots in the house as you trailed along.
Much to the behest of his mother Jisung planned on having many more days like this and little did you know that the ring burning a hole in his coat pocket back in your hometown was the thing he was most excited to bring back in the next suitcase...
#nct dream angst#nct dream#nct dream fic#nct dream fluff#nct dream x reader#nct fluff#nct fanfic#nct angst#nct au#nct dream au#park jisung#jisung park#jisung nct#jisung fluff#jisung angst#jisung oneshot#nct oneshot#nct dream oneshot
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Pyrah reaction to jaune going on a date with Cinder.
"See you guys, later!" Jaune called as he walked out the dorm.
"Later, Jaune~!" Nora sang. "If you don't come back, we're gonna assume the best~!"
"I feel like we're going to call him at some point," Ren amended to his partner, "just to make sure his date is going well."
"And mess up his groove?!" Nora gasped in offense. "Never! Right, Pyrrha?"
"Uh-huh..." Pyrrha mumbled as she watched Jaune walk down the hallway. When her partner came to her with the news of him going on a date, she responded the same way she did when he was going to ask Weiss to the dance; she was supportive, swallowing her pride and trusting in Jaune's decision, even if it meant losing him forever. "Yeah..."
"See? She agrees with me!" Nora beamed.
"Are you sure you're okay with this, Pyrrha?" Ren asked, placing a hand on her shoulder. She flinched and looked at him with instinctive panic. He quickly removed his hand, keeping it close to his chest. "Pardon me."
"No, no, it's fine." Pyrrha sighed.
"Is it, though?" Nora asked. "I mean, Jaune is your partner and, well..."
"Well, what?" Pyrrha huffed, turning away from the door. "That I would be jealous of Jaune's date because I may have feelings for him? That by letting Jaune go, I've forever doomed myself to the infamous friend-zone, leaving feeling alone and vulnerable for the first time in my life since meeting Jaune?"
Nora and Ren looked to each other, then to Pyrrha.
"I mean, yeah, kinda." Nora answered.
"Well, that's not true at all!" Pyrrha went to her closet, quickly grabbing her huntress outfit. "In fact, I am completely independent, and I don't need Jaune to keep myself occupied!" She darted into the shared bathroom, almost bulldozing her remaining teammates in her way. "In fact, I'll use this time to better myself!" She shouted from the bathroom. It swung open and Pyrrha quickly passed the two and stepped outside the dorm. "I'll use this time to improve myself! To make myself a better huntress!"
As the door shut behind her, Nora and Ren were left to look at each other in stunned silence.
"Uh, should we go make sure she's okay?" Asked Ren.
"You can," Nora offered, "but I know better than to get in that girl's way!"
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Why was she doing this? Was this really what she should be doing? Would this be considered a tantrum? This really felt like a tantrum. After all, what would Jaune think?
Pyrrha shook her head after pulling her sword free of recent drone victim. She shouldn't have been having thoughts like this. After all, Jaune was his own person, so she shouldn't be so concerned about him, much as she wanted to be. He won't always be around, so it makes sense for her to be independent from him now and then. After all, she didn't want their partnership to develop into a codependency.
Or maybe she did? Much as she wanted to be more than just Jaune's partner, there was a part of her that also wanted to keep the status quo of their relationship. It's better to play it safe with what you already know and are used to, right? After all, Pyrrha had always been Pyrrha before Jaune's arrival in her life, and she'll be that way after Jaune was gone from it.
To spend time with Cinder. To care for Cinder. To leave Pyrrha behind to wed, and have children, and grow old, and become legends with Cinder. After all, Jaune chose Cinder, and Pyrrha would accept what, or whoever Jaune would choose.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't the Invincible Girl?"
"Hello, Cardin." Pyrrha greeted flatly. The former bully may have been forgiven by Jaune, but the rest of the team had all agreed that the feeling was not spread mutually throughout the rest of his friend group. "Are you also training?"
"Nah, no need to." Cardin grinned. "No need to improve on perfection, right~?"
"No." Pyrrha scowled, walking to the drone service station. What little drones that remained would be deployed from here while the drones still on the training ground would be relocated to the basement level, where they would be restored to fighting capabilities... if it were possible to do so. "There's no such thing as perfect, and if there was, it would have to be maintained to keep it's 'perfect' status."
Cardin chuckled. "Well, I guess you would know that, wouldn't you?" Oh no... He was hitting on her, wasn't he? "So maybe you could help me maintain my perfection? Teach me a thing or two?"
Pyrrha was about to send out drones, with or without Cardin in the arena when a thought came to her. "Okay, Cardin. I'll make you a deal." She stepped away from the podium. "If you can beat me, I'll help train you to... keep your perfection."
"I'm not an idiot, Nikos." Cardin snorted. "You could beat me bare-handed!"
"Could I?" Pyrrha asked. "We can test that right now with me not using any weapons."
"Hmm..." Cardin squinted his eyes. "And what if you win?"
"Oh, I think the workout will be more than enough for me."
"Hah! Alright then!" Cardin grinned. "Get ready to lose, Pyrrha!"
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"I... I can't believe I lost..." Pyrrha whimpered pathetically.
"Believe it, Nikos." Cardin chuckled. "Now, about my training..." He curled his finger under her chin. "I think I know where to start~."
"Fine..." Pyrrha groused, her face flush with defeat.
"Heh heh..." Cardin chuckled from inside the trash can. "Yeah..."
"HAH!" Pyrrha huffed, walking out of the gym, victorious. "I was right. I am far from perfect." She smiled back to Cardin, his legs limply dangling from the bin. "Thanks, Cardin! I'll be sure to let your team know where you are." She giggled. "If they ask."
"If who asks?"
"Jaune!" She flinched, seeing her partner walking up to her. "Oh, uh, I was training and, well..." She then noticed the mess he had all over him. "What happened to you?"
"It's..." Jaune sighed. "It's a long story."
"Well, you can tell us back at the dorm."
"Uh, actually..." Jaune rubbed the back of his head. "I'd rather not talk about it."
"She was that bad, huh?" Pyrrha prodded as they walked.
"Well, no, but..." Jaune pursed his lips. "I guess we were just... incompatible."
"Incompatible how?" Pyrrha asked as they climbed the steps. "Er, if you don't mind me asking."
"Well, she..." He stopped to think for a moment. "She wasn't really that interested in me. And whenever I asked her about her life, she'd get all defensive."
"Well, it is her life." Pyrrha nodded.
"Yeah, but... When I asked her about where she wanted to eat, she called me an idiot for not planning that far ahead."
"Oh, really?" Pyrrha raised a brow. "Well, what was your plan?"
"Well, I didn't really have a plan because I thought she was doing all the planning. I mean, she was the one who asked me out."
"Hmm..." Pyrrha pursed her lips this time. "I think you two should have talked about it."
"If I could, I would- WHOA!" Jaune slipped, suddenly finding his hand caught mid-air by Pyrrha. "Thanks." He smiled.
"No problem." She smiled back as he stood on his own feet again. "What were you saying?"
"I was saying-" He looked down, seeing he was still holding her hand. "Oh! My bad!" He yanked his hand away.
"No, no! I'm sorry!" She held up her hands defensively.
Jaune's smile fell a bit. "Actually, now that I brought it up, she actually got mad at me for apologizing. Said something like, 'apologies are excuses for incompetence'."
"She sounds..."
"Mean? Bossy? A total pain?"
"I was going to say, 'difficult to work with'," Pyrrha giggled, "but those work, too."
"Heh... Yeah..." It was then that they arrived at their dorm. "Can't wait to get out of these puke-covered clothes."
"Oh, did she do that to you?"
"No, I just didn't make it to the trash can on the way back." He chuckled. He then sighed. "Honestly, Pyrrha, I kinda wish we went out instead."
At this, Pyrrha perked up. "R-Really?!"
"Yeah," Jaune nodded as he entered, "I feel like hanging out with my best friend would have been better than wasting my time getting yelled at for a few hours." He walked into the bathroom.
"Jaune!" She shouted, suddenly noticing Ren and Nora were in the room, staring at her. Regardless, it was now or never.
"Er, yeah, Pyrrha?"
"Would... Would you like to go out with me then?" Ren and Nora looked at her with wide eyes, slowly turning to Jaune, both almost shaking with anticipation.
"Uh... No thanks, Pyrrha."
And just like that, all of Pyrrha's hopes had been shattered. She wanted to cry. She wanted to fall to her knees and break down. She'd already let her guard down to ask him, so she might as well let it all out completely. But while she was looking at him, she couldn't. Not while he was looking at her, she couldn't.
"Tonight was rough as it was." Jaune scratched his head. "Maybe next week would be better."
"Okay." The door shut and Pyrrha sat down on her bed. Suddenly, Ren and Nora were in front of her. She waved them off like pestering gnats. "Not now, please..."
"Uh, yes, now!" Nora took hold of Pyrrha's hand with both of her own.
"Did you hear what you two just said?" Ren asked.
"Of course I did." Pyrrha sighed. "He said, 'No thanks, Pyrrha.' Hah... At least he was up-front and honest with me."
"Pyrrha..." Ren took hold of the champion's shoulders. "What did he say after that?"
"He said tonight was rough and that... next week... would... be... better..."
Pyrrha threw off the two and scrambled for the opposite end of her bed. Taking hold of her pillow, she squealed her delight into the cushy, feathery bedrest. Meanwhile, in the bathroom, Jaune was doing the same into a bath towel as he realized what he'd just said to her.
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"Yo, Cardin! You in here?" Russel called with his following. "You think he went to a diner?"
"Ugh, no way!" Dove waved his hand as Lark stood close behind him. "No way he would eat that trash!"
#rwby#jaune arc#pyrrha nikos#cinder fall#cardin winchester#lie ren#nora valkyrie#russel thrush#sky lark#dove bronzewing#arkos
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Finally... After 5 days... I finished it... Fucking finally.
The Cipher family
This is an art piece I made for my take of the Relativity Falls AU. So here is the Cipher family!
And here's some info below~~~
Steve Pyramid/Cipher:
- He was adopted by Scalene and Euclid Cipher when he was really young due to the fact that they couldn't have kids.
- 20 years old.
- Still lives with their parents.
- His bubbly personality may make him appear naive to others but don't get fooled, he isn't.
- Agnostic.
- Has anxiety, masks it behind crappy jokes.
- Likes to bother others for fun.
- Used to babysit Manly Dan, now that he's 16 they hang out.
- Mostly hangs out with Dan and his friend group, he's like that one cool older cousin to them.
- Studied really hard to get good grades to prove that his adopted parents did a good job raising him.
- Had a burn out but managed to end highschool with good grades.
- Takes two years off of studies, promising his parents he's gonna focus on searching for a good university on his second year off.
- Doesn't really wanna get into a university, he just wants to travel the world in a van and get a dog.
- Hides his eye to be supportive to Bill.
- Is an artist but parents don't think the profession will get him money.
- Shitty fashion taste, dresses himself.
Bill (William) Cipher:
- Bill and Steve's parents don't know how Bill managed to exist. Neither did the doctors. Nor does Bill himself. Two things he knows is that he KNOWS the process of how his mom somehow got pregnant with him, and that he HATES it here.
- Is 12 years old.
- Is a miracle baby.
- Has slightly sharper teeth.
- Has anophthalmia, hides his missing eye behind his hair and says to others it's because of style.
- Shitty vision but refuses to wear glasses.
- He is falsely diagnosed with schizophrenia because when he was little he would "see things" (it's Gravity Falls, so ofc he was seeing things).
- Atheist (he says that the only god in his life is himself).
- Takes medicine for anophalmia and schizophrenia.
- The medicines make him feel out of it and not really there, and also tired all the time.
- Masks it behind a cheeky smile and a cocky behavior.
- Has ADHD but the signs are not very prominent because of the side effects of the medicines (one day he's gonna go off the schizophrenia pills. That will be when his ADHD symptoms make a much more prominent appearance. When he gets diagnosed he will be prescribed with even more medicines which he will rarely take because after years of medicine he's gotten sick of them. Until then, he's supposedly schizophrenic).
- His best friend is Pyronica.
- Mostly hangs out with Stan and Pyronica, sometimes Ford and Fidds might tag along too.
- Hates Stan, he only sticks around because Pyronica finds him cool.
- Has a crush on Ford.
- Hates Fiddleford because he also has a crush on Ford.
- Likes making their Grunkle Dipper angry for no reason.
- Mama's boy, but sometimes her clinginess can become irrigating and overwhelming.
- Good at math.
- Wants to become a CEO of a big business to start his plan for world domination.
- Is smarter than he looks.
- Likes to creep up on people.
- Likes silly straws.
- Is into astrology.
- Likes alt fashion.
- Good fashion taste, his mom still dresses him.
Euclid Cipher:
- Works as an accountant at the GF bank.
- 50 years old.
- Catholic.
- Loves his sons.
- Wants Steve to get into a good university and become a teacher or an accountant, he doesn't think art is gonna get him anywhere.
- Believes Pyronica is a bad influence for Bill but when he tried to get him away from her he kept sneaking out at night to get to her.
- His top hat was given to him by his late father which is why he wears it on all times.
- Comes from a wealthy family (not rich, but they're quite comfortable despite being four people in the house).
- Thinks Bill's fascination with stars is ridiculous but he keeps his mouth shut.
- Expects a lot from his healthy son, expects less from his ill son (both kids know that).
- Thinks Mason Pines and his nephews shouldn't be allowed near his son (he knows Bill is gonna disobey him anyway).
Scalene Cipher:
- Owns a small hair salon.
- 46 years old.
- Catholic.
- Loves her sons.
- Boy mom.
- Overprotective over Bill.
- She calls Bill her "little miracle baby", "blessing from the Lord" and sometimes even her "first love" (ew) because she didn't think it was possible for her to give birth.
- Was rather saddened at Bill's eye deformity and even more at his "schizophrenia diagnosis".
- Told Bill to hide his missing eye so people wouldn't judge.
- Is good friends with Fiddleford's mom, kinda ironic though.
- Thinks Bill's world domination plans are cute.
- Picks out Bill's clothes still, Euclid tells her he's old enough to dress himself, she doesn't listen.
- Goes to church every Sunday.
- Thinks Bill and Pyronica are dating.
The Cipher family, although seemingly perfect, is quite dysfunctional. At dinner time their parents would be mostly focused on Steve and his academic education. Bill could have said he almost died that day and they would hardly notice. They go to church every Sunday.
Even though they're supposed to replace Candy's family (yes, ik we never see them in the show), they're kinda more Northwest family codded (mostly because there's not gonna be a Northwest family in my AU, so I took liberty with our limited information on Euclid and Scalene.
(btw this is them in Gacha, I'm only dropping this here is because you can see all of his outfit)
#it's 1 am#i'm so tired#i'm kinda proud of how the art came out#i'm gonna go to bed#gravity falls#gravity falls au#relativity falls#bill cipher#human bill cipher#euclid cipher#scalene cipher#pyramid steve#art#my art#original art#teen artist#sorry for any spelling mistakes#i'm fucking exhausted
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Crowley, lying on the sofa, slowly: And he never understands that I try to pick him up.
Berrigan, sitting next to him, notebook in hand: Have you tried to be more obvious? Or more caring?
Crowley, tired: I've tried everything
Berrigan: Food?
Crowley: Sure, I've cooked for him hundreds of times, I've taken him to the inn for dinner a couple of times, made provisions for the road. I even feed his kids sometimes.
Berrigan: Hmm
Crowley:
Crowley: Ok, it's been a quarter of an hour, move along.
they swap places
Crowley emphatically from above the notebook: And what, dude, you're still acting like it's a school love and just staring at him instead of, I don't know, trying to talk to him?
Berrigan:
Berrigan: I felt attacked, and this was supposed to be a safe space
Crowley, sighs heavily: Never mind, tell me what's new with the song for him. Just please cut out the descriptions of the smile and the eyes because I've had enough, I've really got it, yeah, he's smiling nicely, you can leave that out
Berrigan, a bit offended: Mind to remember that you-
Crowley: Okay, fine, say what you need to say just keep in mind I am the one who needs to be able to look Leander straight in the face in one hour, so...
Berrigan: Straight?
Crowley: YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN GET TO THE POINT
#rangers apprentice#ranger's apprentice#incorrect quotes#ranger’s apprentice#halt o'carrick#ranger’s apprentice meme#ra memes#crowley meratyn#cralt#berrigan#the gay idiots#therapy#therapy for the gay idiots run by the gay idiots#'I think I may like-like my best friend' support group#just go ahead and try to convince me that Berrigan was straight#or anyone in the Corps lmao#Crowley & Berrigan besties because I said so#berrigan x leander for the same reason#deal with it
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Being nonbinary and dressing feminine sometimes despite very much not being a woman is. Its like hello strangers hello new friends im making please dont immediately steamroll
#contemplating a lot#rant#feel free to ignore#i just. so like. im very nonbinary#which i suppose many nonbinary people are#to the point im like. well i cant go to a transmasc support group or a transfem support group cause i doubt either would#see me as someonr who fits (wish my city had a general trans meetup but we arent big enough i guess)#i know I KNOW theres a bunch of cisgender fucks who think nonbinary = woman and it drives me up a Fucking wall#i know theres (even more ouch) a portion of lesbians and queer ppl who see nonbinary as woman-lite or feminine man#and just dont fucking put in the effort to grasp what being outside man or woman (or overlapping) could be#(probably ovdrlaps w ppl who refuse to grasp pansexuality or bisexuality)#and like. when i was young? maybe i wouldve seen myself as a trans man#but when that didnt totally fit i felt well. maybe bigender then. nonbinary. yeah that fits i suppose#or maybe i am a trans man who just doesnt want to change myself for societal pressure#but i do relate to being a woman too? so nonbinary feels best. but i certainly dont feel like a woman#im okay with she he they. but if i tell strangers theyll usually default to ONE so i just say#THEY so strangers dont immediately try to basically pretend im not nonbinary by sticking to another pronoun they feel is easier to them#and if i say They the fact remains: are these new strangers or friends dicks who dont respect my gender even tho they#accomodated to sayibg they? do they say she in private to friends. do they refer to me as a gender im not when im not present#idk i have been... interacting with a lot of straight dudes lately. and im like? im bi and nonbinary so im like. well if ur straight dude im#not sure u would even Wanna date me? u are aware im a dude too? are u okay with that? can u respect that???#which has NEVER happened to me before. cause i only dated bi guys nonbinary peeps like me or nonbinary lesbians#ive never dated a person i feared may actually not see me as I Actually Am and have accepted iy
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i’m in such disbelief right now and beyond disgusted.
i really hope y’all are choosing your morals over kpop; because we do not know these men at all. i will never side with or defend a predator and a criminal, even with little to no proof. even if there is the smallest chance he may be innocent, i will always believe the victim first.
some of you, as fans of the boys for years and him in general, i know you must be feeling disappointed and betrayed. you’re not dumb for previously supporting him, as we couldn’t have possibly known. but now is the time for a reality check and it’s time to wake up and take a step back. this just goes to show that we know absolutely nothing about them.
for sm to just outright put out a statement on their own before any rumors even surfaced and immediately kick him out? this has to be insanely serious and i’m terrified of what he could’ve done. the crazy thing is with everything currently happening in korea with the telegram situation, and korean women constantly being in danger in general because of the men there, i’m not at all surprised that celebrities are being exposed. sm has protected criminals before, and held onto lucas when his scandal came out as well as other artists who have been exposed for similar crimes. i can’t even imagine the severity of the current situation. we’ve seen what happened with the burning sun, and these men are not immune to being misogynistic, vile human beings.
members have already unfollowed him and deleted posts with him in them; his best friend of 17yrs has unfollowed him. the company taking the initiative and him getting kicked out of the group in less than a second before anything even came out, no denying the claims or even trying to defend him. that should be enough to tell you and understand how serious this actually is. i am beyond disgusted with him and this whole situation.
i sincerely hope the victim is doing okay and praying for them to heal and get the justice they deserve. and remember that your love for these celebrities should always be conditional, because we do not know them. it’s their job to put on a show and show you their public persona, but behind closed doors? we don’t know what they’re actually like. we put them on a pedestal and yet we don’t know what they’re really capable of. they are still men after all. i hope the police are taking this seriously. there needs to be consequences and these women need to be protected.
let this be a lesson to all of us. they don’t know us, and we don’t know them, not really, not at all.
ALWAYS choose morals over these strangers you idolize. and as women, we should be standing with the victims.
maybe not all men, but enough of them. and maybe not all men, but somehow always a man. and going forward, i will continue to support nct as a whole with the remaining members. however, keeping the situation in mind, i will be supporting from afar for a little while. if the situation escalates and other members are investigated and new information comes to light about the rest of them either knowing or possibly being involved, it would be best to step away for good. i will do my best to stay updated. but i do hope the rest of the members are doing okay, and hopefully no other members were involved; but this, just shows that they can always surprise us. you never think it’ll be your fave, until it is.
let’s hope this causes a domino effect and more of these people are exposed and charged for the crimes they’re committing.
sending love to anyone who has ever experienced sexual violence or has been targeted and been in a similar situation. it is not your fault and it never was!
love you all and my dms are always open if you need to vent. <3
❗️EDIT: also i wanna add that we need to not praise the rest of the members or any other celebrity for simply unfollowing him on social media. that is the least of anyone’s worries.
we don’t know if they were aware, we don’t know if they knew and were protecting him or turning a blind eye. it could be them trying to save themselves and clear their guilty conscience. maybe they didn’t know and are just as shocked as we are, we don’t know that either.
we blindly trust these people and believe they have good intentions but look at where that can lead to. fans being upset is valid, yes; but remember people with money and power will do whatever it takes to sweep things under the rug and make it go away in order to save face and keep their image and reputation.
follow-up post here.
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Some of my favorite, understated moments with heartbreaking implications for Halsin
1. Halsin threatening to turn into a mouse in the epilogue if the player brags about his achievements- he's so shy and humble that just being acknowledged for LITERALLY BUILDING A COMMUNE HIMSELF makes him want to hide. A mouse is a very symbolic choice here: not only easy to hide, but also easily overlooked and forgotten. The idea of his accomplishments being acknowledged is so terrifying for him that he wants to turn into an animal no one will notice, instead of his usual strong, large, noticeable bear.
2. "Sometimes, I think people look at me and imagine my feelings can't be hurt." This isn't the kind of thing that happens after one or two people act like jerks. This is years and years of cruel treatment, of his emotions being demeaned and mocked because of his size. Of people judging him before even meeting him- and forming an entirely wrong view of him. Halsin is a bighearted, tender, sentimental man, yet because he's big... Well, big people don't have feelings, surely. /s
3. "You and I may struggle to go unnoticed in such environs, Karlach[...] Folk of our stature can be a lure for drunkards seeking a brawl, I have found," combined with, "There is a particular discomfort to besting one you know to be weaker than yourself - even when needs must," from a different scene. People have sought him out and fought him because of his size (which had to have been terrifying, especially the first time), and he feels guilty when he takes out someone he knows is weaker, even if they STARTED it. How many times has the poor guy been traveling and then had to defend himself against someone 1/2 his size, making HIM look like the asshole to onlookers, and reinforcing that whole "people think I can't be hurt" thing?
4. "It was always destined to be so, if we prevailed. But the foreknowledge makes it no less bittersweet..." (About the players' paths diverging post brain battle), combined with "I see... After all my years of living, I know all too well that nothing lasts forever. Yet a parting can sting, nonetheless," if the player breaks up with him in the ending. This poor guy was having the time of his life adventuring with the group (and possibly falling in love there) yet never believed it would truly last (because of his abandonment issues). And then to have it confirmed.... he must have felt so awful in that moment, even if he was being dignified about it.
5. "You came for me... thank you. I feared Orin's accursed smile would be the very last sight I beheld," when Halsin is freed from Orin, combined with, "Orin's blades. I hoped my friends would save me..." If he is killed by Orin instead and Speak With the Dead is used on his corpse. The tone of his voice in the first line, especially added to that bit in the second... he never thought the player was coming to save him. He HOPED they would. Not "believed". Hoped. He thought he was going to die there- just like how he was in the Underdark for THREE YEARS and no one came to save him. And if it's confirmed... Yeah. That. (Sidenote: if you ask his corpse if he has any regrets, he says not telling Thaniel and Oliver goodbye, and not getting to see their land flourish. :( My heart. :( )
6. "I... have not had true confidantes for some time. The Shadow Curse robbed me of almost all my peers, and replaced them with the weight of responsibility. Perhaps that caused me to gild undeserving memories of my youth." Halsin was so miserable and stressed being Archdruid that he romanticized his past as a sex slave, viewing it as a safer, even happier alternative. There were actually times when Halsin thought he might rather be a sex slave than continue to be Archdruid. In a sense, for the 100 years the Shadow Curse was around, Halsin was just as much a prisoner as Thaniel was in the Shadowfell, but Halsin's prison had invisible bars. The Shadow Curse took away his entire support system, and being Archdruid forced him to be the strong one, always, never allowed to be weak or scared, forced him to take control of situations when he hated it, forced him to spend his time sorting out people instead of being in nature. And he was MISERABLE. For 100 years.
7. "You understand me almost perfectly. Only my late mother may have bested you." (Said if you get one question wrong at the love dryad test). He misses his mama. :( Especially when you consider that if you steal Balthazar's "Mother Dearest" and taunt him about it, Halsin disapproves (and is the only one to do so), while returning her gets you approval (which only Halsin approves of). And then the line when you look into a mirror while controlling him, "more like my father, with each passing day..." He really misses them. :(
8. "I am loathe to see anyone behind bars. It reminds me of my time as a guest of the goblins." He is, secretly, still quite traumatized from his time in the goblin pens, but he brushes it off. Just like every OTHER time he is hurt.
9. "I am aware [of having a habit of getting captured]. Perhaps I put too much faith in my skills of negotiation, or want to see good where there is none. It would be easy to resort to nature's fury whenever something stood in my way, yet I cannot help but feel I would be sullying the Oak Father's gifts. Naive perhaps... but I still draw breath." Halsin is aware he gets hurt often because of his desire to see good in people until he has no other choice, but refuses to give up anyway (which is backed up by that letter Gut had on her where she reveals Halsin TRIED to help the goblins, saying he could cure them of their tadpoles, only to be thrown in the cage, with Gut threatening to have his stomach cut open and maggots placed inside it.) Further, even though he is an Archdruid, and one of the most devoted, and explicitly has Silvanus's favor (Halsin says that gaining his favor was the only way he was able to open the portal to the Shadowfell), he still constantly worries about using Silvanus's powers, to the point of wondering if an actual threat to his safety actually merits using his powers. Which... combined with some other stuff, reads like one hell of a problem with self-worth.
10. "At least you were not present. Grim as [the ruined battlefield] is now, it was worse on the day of the battle. A vivid wound upon my memory[...] I was lucky - I lived, when so many did not. It would take me a day and a night to recite the names of all the friends I lost" combined with, "I was [present when the Shadow Curse was unleashed]. Part of my spirit was shorn away from me here, and never left," and, if Last Light falls, "All gone... devoured by the shadows. Oak Father preserve us, it's just like a hundred years ago[...] We are [still standing]. Yet there is a burden to being the survivor... the witness to others' tragedies. It only grows heavier with time." He has so much PTSD and survivor guilt from the Shadow Curse. :( No wonder it's all he can think about- to the point that some of the other companions even get annoyed at him for his obsession.
11. "I never quite realised how burdened I was, until I met you. The threat of the shadow curse, the politics of the grove... I was forgetting who I was, but you lifted the fog. Thank you." Not only does this tie in with the above, with his PTSD from the curse and his utter misery at being Archdruid, but this HEAVILY implies Halsin had depression. Like... that "fog" line hits HARD if you have or have had depression, because that's exactly what it feels like. And the "forgetting who I was" bit too. Not just losing his sense of self to the depression, but to the neverending responsibilities of being Archdruid. I keep repeating myself, but damn, this guy has really and truly spent an entire century being absolutely MISERABLE. :(
12. "Forgive me. I... lost the run of myself. Sometimes, if blood runs hot enough, it's difficult to tame the beast." With that little disgusted groan/sigh, the fury and disgust at himself visible on his face, and the way he rushes to get out the rest of it- he thinks he fucked up so badly that you're about to leave him, maybe forever. And then if you reject him after this? "Ah... I see. Well, of course. Back to camp then." He has the most heartbroken look on his face here, and the way he says "of course" like he just... knew this was coming the instant he accidentally wildshaped. He felt that the first time he let ANY of his imperfections show, the player would leave him. :(
13. "Death is nature's final slumber - it awaits us all. Do not punish yourself over those lost, or give in to despair - not while there are still folk in need of your help." (Said to a Dark Urge if they tell him they're not much of a hero and most people needing them end up dead) Not only is Halsin speaking from experience here, but it's very clear he is STILL doing exactly what he tells Durge not to do, to himself- punishing himself over those who were lost, struggling with devastating survivor guilt.
14. "The grove has cut itself off from the world, to jealously guard its own little pocket of nature. No one shall ever enter or leave again. And I have been evicted from the very place I was charged to safeguard. A telling summary of my time as Archdruid, perhaps..." If the Grove is sealed and you ask him about it later, this is what he says. Interesting that he views being evicted from the place he was in charge of protecting to be a "telling summary." He was forced to take the leadership role there, and yet it was clear he wasn't wanted or respected by a great number of the Druids (exempting Nettie, Rath, and Apikusis). He got a truly thankless job that took damn near EVERYTHING from him emotionally/mentally, causing him to develop depression and causing him to backslide in his previous healing from his trauma from his time as a sex slave, he still gave EVERYTHING to the Grove, and in return...... almost none of his Druids appreciated or even liked him. (I could seriously write at least five metas about how obviously miserable Halsin was at the Grove, despite caring for it deeply).
15. "You could have done anything, gone with anyone... yet you chose me." Said at the epilogue to a solo romanced player who went to the commune with him. There's so many layers of heartbreak here. He is still surprised, six months later, that the player chose him. He even thinks the player will regret it, and will decide they want an adventurer's life after all after seeing everyone else. He doesn't think he is good enough- doesn't think he deserves the player, and yet at the same time he loves them so much that he is heartbroken over the possibility they might agree with him. He thinks that given a chance, there is little chance they would actually choose him again. (He is put at ease quickly when the player promises they picked him for a reason, but even the explanation he gives for why he was so worrie is heartbreaking- that he's so used to a tumultuous life that he thinks something must go wrong. He has been so traumatized so many times over the years that he just has almost no ability to think that true happiness is possible [or deserved] for him.) Something about that is just heartbreaking, even though his ending is one of the happiest of any of the companions.
Someone give this sweet bear man a hug, please :(
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reputation - lando norris
pop star reader x lando norris social media au
part two - part three
a/n: lando did a very reputation-like helmet and the hamster in my brain started working. rep's songs are also very lando coded to me. faceclaim is soyeon from (G)I-dle
requests are open, but i may get to them late because uni is kicking my ass!
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f1waggossip
f1waggossip: McLaren’s golden boy seems to be newly single… at least that’s what the streets say, considering his last girlfriend, pop star Y/N L/N, has not been seen in months at the paddock following a very public fall out with her former girl squad, and consequent fall from grace from everyone’s eyes. They seemed in love. What do you think?
landonorrizz: honestly, i never understood the hype for her. she has always been a red flag and dramatic!!
mercedesgarage: i don’t get it lol i don’t follow her, what happened?
455chilli: basically she was friends with other singers, models and actresses and they have recently unfollowed her and exposed her for not being as great as everyone thinks
y/nforever: you mean she had a friend group who turned on her out of nowhere? lol what her ex friends have said is based on jealousy
landostareyes: it seems like they broke up but they were really cute together :// i kinda feel bad but she also seems to be the problem
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landonorris
landonorris: p2 cake babyyyyyyyyy
supremey/n: that is my y/n if i’ve ever seen her
formulaonegirl: so they’re still together
carlandocontent: it could be any girl tbh, it’s been months since lando has even mentioned her
papayaheart: it’s even worse if they’re still together and she just won’t show up to support him in races anymore lol
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y/nusername
y/nusername: Reputation. Out November 17.
Comments have been disabled.
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landonorris
landonorris: Are you ready for it? Reputation out November 17.
y/nlandodefender: nothing has ever been as iconic as a Y/N comeback special helmet i am in tears
landolove: reputation helmet to beat the breakup allegations wasn’t on my bingo card
supremey/n: I KNOW THAT’S RIGHT
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f1waggossip
f1waggossip: Y/N re-debuts at the paddock.
y/naura: ohhhhhhh i know some of y'all are MAD but my girl will stay thriving with the album of the year
softlylando: came back with a bang, goddamnnnn
mclarengirly: lando is definitely bagging a podium for her today!!
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landonorris
landonorris: i like her for her
y/nusername: Even in my worst times, you could see the best in me. 🖤
ferrariheart: shut up this is so cute
norrisreputation: mans really said we've been together all this time LMAO
babyfaceoscar: where is everyone who was calling her a red flag and saying her and lando didn't belong together?
dailylando: been real quiet since reputation dropped
magicy/n: i woulda stfu too after she released something like call it what you want, nevermind lando's promotion helmet LMAO
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y/nusername
y/nusername: The Reputation World Tour officially began and I can’t thank you enough for showing up for me, when I thought I couldn’t even show up for myself. I might make the same mistakes, burn bridges and never learn, but I know I did one thing right: have the best, most loyal fans. Also, it seems right to thank the man who inspired me to write way too many love songs for this album, the king of my heart, landonorris. 🖤
landonorris: i believe i was also called gorgeous and stuff
y/nusername: I am truly never complimenting you again
#f1#f1 au#f1 fanfic#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 x reader#formula 1#lando norris#lando norris smau#lando norris fluff#lando norris x you#lando norris fic#lando norris imagine#lando norris au#lando norris x reader#lando norris x y/n
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am I wrong for saying “shoutout to asexuals”?
ok so recently, whenever a conversation has died or whatever, I’ll just say “shoutout to asexuals” and then move on, because, idk, it’s a bit funnygoofy and also I like my asexual friends. Anyway, I said it in front of my mother and she said not to do it anymore, because it could be seen as “othering” people with asexuality. I don’t see it that way at all, but I wouldn’t like to be accidentally homophobic, so I’m using a poll to get real asexual opinions
for reference, I’m bisexual, and my mother knows that, so I am part of the LQBTQ+ community, but I’m (maybe) not asexual. I’ve been thinking about things around the aro/ace spectrum, based on past experiences, but I feel as though I’m not sure enough to give myself any proper labels. My mother doesn’t know about that part.
so, my mother’s arguments:
It may seem like I’m “othering” the asexual community by saying that
its like being the a white girl in a room with a few black people in it and saying “shoutout to black people” - it feels weird to her
im not saying it because I genuinely want to support asexuals, I’m saying it as more of a verbal tic
my 2 asexual friends agreeing is not a large enough group, even if they both are fine with it, others may not be
and my arguments are:
Im saying it to include asexuals, because they can sometimes feel disregarded in LGBTQ+ spaces
its pride month, literally the best time to give random unprovoked asexuality shoutouts
Idk, I feel like asexual people wouldn’t really be offended by that
both of my asexual friends think it’s hilarious and encourage me to keep going
it’s like a cis person saying “yay trans pride” at random moments and being told not to because it’s making trans people feel more separate
im not othering asexual people, I’m celebrating them
also pls reblog this around I want the largest possible data set so I know if I’m problematic or not
#lgbtq#lgbtqia#lgbtq community#asexual#ace#aroace#aromantism#aromantic#arospec#tumblr polls#my polls#tournament poll#poll time#advice needed#advice#long post#question#questions
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Hello for my USAmerican therian/otherkin/alterhuman/etc pals and to whoever it may concern:
For this native american heritage month I ask you to think critically when describing an area as "your territory". We are on stolen, indigenous land. You do not own the "territory". You are living on indigenous territory. You can absolutely have places you call home! We all do! Everyone has their little secret wild places which they may enjoy the privacy of, share with their therian friends or pack, and feel at home in. But at the end of the day it is not your "territory". It is already indigenous territory.
I see all different statements here and there from the alterhuman community, along the lines of "Do you have territory? If so how did you claim it? How do you mark it as yours so others don't go there? What if you are doing quads or in a shift and a non therian comes in your territory? Urgghh humans in my territory! God I wish people would stay away from my territory" -- And like I get that it's not that serious considering it's mostly younger/newer therians making statements like this, but for those who are aware and want to make a difference please remember that you do not actually own any of this land. You are on stolen land. And I encourage you to research where you are living and which tribe(s) it belongs to! And if you are passionate about the environment, about animals, about inclusivity and acceptance (which I hope you are as a therian/otherkin/alterhuman), that you do your best to PROTECT this land. Find ways you can get involved so that the land can be given back and protected. Get to know the environmental politics in your area. Support tribal efforts and land back campaigns. Join groups committed to this cause if you are able. Sign petitions at the bare minimum! You can totally make a difference!
#therian#therian community#therianthropy#otherkin#alterhumanity#nonhuman#therian gear#therian things#theriotype#therian territory#otherkinity#alterhuman#therian stuff#otherkin community#otherkin things#otherkin stuff#otherkin positivity#indigenous#native american#land back#indigenous issues#indigenous sovereignty#indigenous rights
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🔎Remember when I told you I had a hunch that Paige may have known who Azzi was before they officially met in 2017? Especially in the 2019 overtime video saying she knew Azzi for 3 years even though officially she had only met her 2 years prior. Like it felt like a slip up.
Well let me set the scene. It is July 8, 2016. They both overlapped at AAU Super Showcase. Azzi's team played the older version of Paige's team in the ATL Championship. Unfortunately, they lost: Fairfax Stars 50 – North Tartan 82. But also Azzi's team was playing like two grades up. Like Azzi is 13 years old here.
Anyway, I know Paige's team played the 9th grade division (she was 14 years old at the time) and they won their tournament per my previous post looking at overlaps. Now, I figured, knowing Paige, someone who loves watching basketball and supporting her team, she had to be in the audience of this if there was no conflict.
Well.
At 31:36 of this video I already sent you look who pops up right after Azzi attempts a 3 :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fA9pHTpExvI&t=395s
I haven't watched all of this video for any other moments because frankly, I had to share the fact I was right hahahaha. Someone else change the timeline lmao I'm too tired of the predictability.
You should handle the unsolved cases because it's wild that you found her when she never mentioned it (I'm always amazed by your investigative skills🤯).
Do we think Paige saw Azzi and decided that if she ever ran into her again, she would make sure she became her best friend🤠 (just kidding before anyone takes it seriously). Her grinning face popping up is so funny.
I wasn't sure it was her team because this group is shown coming after Paige's appearance and then moving behind the bench until the end of the game.
You weren't wrong about the score and they did lose💀.
#you're the best#this is reminding of Willannès and Gabby watching Jojo with France#azzi fudd#paige bueckers
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COMPOSITE CHART
Accuracy dependent on ENTIRE chart.
Gemini MC.
Indicates a couple that is a target of gossip. Good or bad.
Moon in 2nd.
Indicates a secure relationship. The two understand each other and provide for each other. Unless other prominent places indicate otherwise, jealously likely isn’t an issue.
Venus in 2nd.
Unless afflicted, this can show a couple that is making money together. They help each other in matters of career & finance. This is a good placement for business partnerships. In a romantic connection, they are very secure and likely sensual. The couple can indulge together. They wish to give each other exactly what the other desires - materialistically, emotionally and physically.
Ascendant in Pisces:
The couple can be very comfortable with each other. Understanding, kind and gentle with each other. Seeing the best in each other. Dreaming of a future together. The negative manifestation of this is romanticizing the image of each other and refusing to see the real version. This couple may tend to hide away their troubles to maintain the connection. This could result in a big blowup.
Sun in 6th.
Positive is this couple helps each other. They are very supportive of one another. The negative is if one person is giving more than the other. Over time one may feel they are being used. They may not always want to be playing “nurse/therapist/teacher role” in the relationship. The stress may make one feel they are obligated to stay & help this person.
However, if both are providing equally for one another, the connection will stay very strong. The couple will naturally begin to see each other as often as possible. Moving in fast (especially if there is a busy 4th house) is possible.
Moon in 11th.
The two may share similar beliefs and goals. Your way of thinking is similar. Regardless of what the connection is you two make good friends. You can be your true self around this person. You two may have shared mutual friends.
Lilith conjunct MC
You may create a reputation for being sexual & scandalous. Together, you may become outsiders in a way. Potentially, this could be toxic. However, that depends on the entire chart.
Examples:
A couple that goes out to parties a lot. They may drink & have a small argument one time in public. It will create a permanent reputation about them being toxic. People will assume the worst.
Public displays of affection could be a bit much (aka annoying couple making out & groping each other in line).
Pluto in 11th.
Gradually, big transformation is likely to happen throughout the relationship. Pluto is very slow moving, you may not realize the changes that are occurring until much later. In 11th, your long terms goals, social awareness, causes you believe in could change. The way you present yourself online could change as well. Friend groups could change. Increase or decrease.
Ex: When my friend broke up with her boyfriend, the mutual friend group decreased. It was highschool so petty shit. People gossiping & disrespectful “jokes” posted on their finstas. Getting mad at those who liked the “joke” post.
Venus in 5th.
Common interests & hobbies. Similar creative expression. For ex: you could both be into photography. Or both into gaming.
This a fun placement to have. There is likely a lot of joy and good memories together. You guys simply have so much together. This can make a couple very romantic & affectionate. You guys could find yourself doing “corny/cheesy” things that the old you thought you’d hate.
Synastry
❣️ Having someone else’s planets in your 7th isn’t always an indicator of a marriage partner. Especially when in the natal chart, you have planets in your first house. This is because of the opposition it creates.
Ex: An Aqua sun & rising friend I knew had a Leo sun partner. This created an opposition with their suns. Two egos clashing. Fought often, she says he was a “literal narcissist” and very controlling. He once texted her she was “a self obsessed bitch”.
❣️ Another note, if you have your 7th House ruler in first like her, be cautious of friends, partners & even business relationships with people who want to control and/or use you.
#astrology observations#composite chart#synastry observations#composite chart observations#venus in 5th#pluto in 11th#venus in 5th house#pluto in 11th house#lilith conjunct mc#moon in 11th house#sun in 6th house#ascendant in pisces#pisces rising#venus in 2nd house#moon in 2nd house#gemini mc#synastry#aqua rising#aquarius sun#leo sun#7th ruler in 1st house#leo descendant
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I just have this feeling that Quinn would listen to his girlfriend talk drama all day long, but he would give her the most common sense advice and it would make her frustrated. Like , no advice, just ears and the occasion opinion (but only if it agrees with her opinion).
A sweet little something for my fellow Quinn girls :))
Spilling the Tea…or Juice
There’s many important things that Quinn Hughes was responsible for since becoming captain of the Canucks. Anything from communicating practice schedules to game day pep talks and so many things in between.
While all of his responsibilities were important, he considered being your boyfriend the most important. He was often tasked with being your voice of reason, talking you down from assuming the worse of things and making sound decisions when you felt impulsive.
If he kept a resumé of the relationship between the two of you, he’d definitely add he was one of the girls. He knew every detail that passed amongst the group chat with you and your friends, whether he wanted to know or not wasn’t really a choice that he had the luxury of choosing. You could say he made the decision when he chose to be your boyfriend.
It was a picture perfect Sunday in the apartment that the two of you shared, the sun shining through the blinds, dust circulating despite yours and Quinn’s best effort to clean the day prior. As you chatted away, Quinn poured the two of you some juice that he had pressed himself, his newfound hobby giving him joy along with your presence.
“I have to tell you something that you can’t repeat, okay Quinn?” You said, taking a sip from the glass while swiveling left to right on the barstool.
“Babe, who would I have to tell?” He chuckled, stealing some strawberry slices off your plate.
“So, you know my coworker? The one that got written up last week?” You stole a piece of cantaloupe off of his plate, perhaps subconsciously playing a game of retaliation.
“The one that decided that they didn’t want to show up for work one day?” He questioned for clarity.
“Yes, that one! Well there’s rumors going around the office that he knocked up the boss’s wife and he’s about to get fired. I was told this, but it may not be true…” Trailing off, Quinn’s eyebrows raised in surprise, a sweet smirk accompanying.
“So why are you talking about it if you don’t know if it’s true? Seems like that’s not fair…” His gaze was soft, but teasing. He knew that wasn’t what you wanted to hear.
“Quinn…that’s not the point!” You whined, his smile growing in response, “…what if he did get her pregnant? We need a TV show at work.”
“What if he didn’t, though. What if you talking about it is just keeping a rumor circulating?” His words were frustrating, too true, but not what you wanted. You wanted him to gossip, which he knew, but he was giving you straight facts.
“Yeah, well, that’s not what the girls are saying…”
He walked around the bar towards you, standing behind you as he rested his head on your shoulder. His arms wrapped around your torso, thumbs rubbing along you sides.
“Oh, really?” He whispered against your ear, “What are the girls saying?”
“They’re saying that it’s true.”
“Well that just means it’s facts, then, doesn’t it?” His fingers began tickling ferociously at your sides, squeals quickly followed as you desperately tried to escape his grip.
“Quinn Hughes, stop it!”
“What do the girls say about this?” He spun your stool around as he placed a gentle kiss to your lips, supporting your chin with his hand.
“Mmm,” You said between kisses, “…I think they would say that we should have a second course here on the bar…” You moaned.
You tried to deepen the kiss, but he pulled away, giggling as you whined about it.
“Has anybody ever told you that you suck at spilling tea?” You grabbed his hand, pulling him close to you.
“Well I guess it’s a good thing I drink juice…”
*
*
*
*
I love Quinn Hughes. That is all.
#nhl imagine#nhl fic#nhl fanfiction#quinn hughes#qh43#quinn hughes imagine#quinn hughes blurb#canucks hockey#vancouver canucks#captain quinn#jack hughes#trevor zegras#alex turcotte#cole caufield#nico hischier
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Okok gonna face my fears and send this off anon . . . ♡ I woke up at 6am and have been plagued by the concept of yan!satosugu with idol darling like all morning
Walk with me here okokokokok. So like satoru obviously has like sooo much money. What if just to get a break from focusing on sorcery all the time he became a sponsor or even producer for a very cute girlypop idol group,,, (and yes I do think he would be kinda weird/creepy to idol darling, especially with how he views himself as basically untouchable (I mean he has enough money to pay the right people off) sooo).
That’s where suguru comes in (I see this as a mostly canon-compliant geto never defected au). Obviously he would want to keep up with what his best friend is up to, so he’s like a day one supporter of said idol group. With how the japanese idol industry seems to have a focus on the youth and purity of female idols, I could definitely see suguru wanting to “protect his oshi’s innocence” . . .
So if (let’s be honest, WHEN) satosugu bring idol darling home, I could totally see suguru just absolutely babying the poor girl to kind of a weird infantilizing degree?? If that makes sense?? Like very much trying to condition darling into relying on them for everything
I would assume that satoru would be a lot more upfront about how much of a gross perv he is (especially since he probably mistreated the group members to some extent)
I think they would expect total compliance from darling, but if darling ever acts up I can’t help but think one of their go-to punishments would be forcing her to perform the groups choreographies with some sort of “handicap” ie vibrator taped to her pussy at the full speed (and yes they would probably reprimand if she messes up - gotta make sure their number one idol isn’t missing practice!!
Speaking of missing practice/group activities, I fully believe it is within satoru’s capabilities to spread the narrative that darling just kinda . . . suddenly “graduated” from the group and left without a trace, so therefore the other members shouldn’t worry about her and should instead just resume group activities!! (I could also see satosugu using this as some kind of mental leverage over idol darling - like “hey, your group is actually way more popular now that you’ve left”)
Sorry gang I fear I let the thoughts simmer for too long . . .
please let me know your thoughts :3
tw - non/con, kidnapping, idol exploitation, long-term stalking, and obsessive behavior.
WAIT may i suggest: suguru and satoru as parasocial ultra-fans of the same idol as kind of an escapism thing from the stress of being some of the world's most powerful sorcerers, with satoru having the fortune to completely devote himself to making him and suguru your #1 fans. you start to recognize them around the fifth time they miraculously appear at the very front of the line for your post-concert meet-and-greet, but since they're a little bit older and they always have a small gaggle of shy, but polite preteens with them, you just assume they're a pair of wealthy fathers eager to fuel their kids' shared fixation. sure, it's a little strange that the white-haired man always seems more excited to shake your hand than his standoffish son, and it does raise a few concerns when the twin girls spend the majority of their time with you gushing about their black-haired father, but you're a very popular idol with a very busy schedule. you don't have a lot of time to think about one strange family out of the hundred or so you'll meet, that night.
you don't have a lot of time to think about them until your group starts getting extravagant, expensive gifts and donations - always paired with the a gushing fan letter and always sent from one of two increasingly familiar names. since you always seem to be the primary focus, you're the one pressured by your producers to film 'thank you' videos that are just a little too intimidate, to post the type of pictures your generous sponsors compliment the most heavily more often than you may like to. it gets to the point where you're being asked how you'd feel about ""private shows"" to ""ensure the support of a select demographic"", but you adamantly refuse every time it's brought up. it's enough to have to deal with satoru's touchiness at your handshake events, suguru's prying gaze from his permanent seat in the front row of your group's concerts. you don't need to be trapped in the same room as them, alone and all-but paid to cooperate, to know that you want as little to do with them as possible.
that is, until your producer slips you a drink that's just a little too bitter during rehearsal and you wake up in a large room decorated entirely with your merch and memorabilia, to satoru's head between your thighs and suguru behind you, an arm wrapped around your waist and his chin propped on your shoulder as he tells you about how excited they are to finally meet their favorite idol in person, how patiently they've been waiting for you to finally retire and take on a more domestic lifestyle. they'll be delighted to find out that, because of how long you've been in the industry and how protective your fans can be, you're still very much a virgin, and you very much need your two biggest fans to show you what you've been missing <3 if you're lucky, they'll even add pictures of your first climax to the shrine they've been building since they day they first discovered you, the shrine they're going to be keeping you inside of from now on. you might be crying, sure, begging to be let go, but that's alright.
in time, you'll realize how lucky you are to have such devoted fans.
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Why Did They Come Into Your Life?
How To Pick A Group:
Typically I recommend going with the image that you find you keep coming back to after giving each of the piles a once over.
Notes:
This reading will probably work best for anyone who you:
Feel a strong bond with and are curious about its significance.
Are seeking clarity on the role of a certain person might be playing in your life journey.
Potentially: Have encountered someone who left a lasting impression.
This reading is for entertainment purposes only. ✨
Content Warning: One of the piles did take on a bit of a heavier tone (not the person's presence, but your background) I've added a content warning explaining a little more at the beginning of it!
LINKS: Dividers | Reading Masterlist | Patreon | Paid Readings- Open
GIVEAWAY: Personal Reading Giveaway (June 2024) — Closed ✨
PILE 1
Cards: Seven of Spring, The Lovers, Ten of Summer, The Moon, Eight of Winter
This person could be...
This feels like you might be thinking of an ex (you’re on good terms with) and may still be a part of your life, a one-sided crush (as in you genuinely don't know if they feel the same), a friend… someone who has you captivated. This person did not break your heart or hurt you intentionally if that's an aspect of the relationship. Someone from in the last two years. If it’s someone current then… they’re very supportive of you— actively supportive. It doesn't feel like someone you’re currently in a relationship with but you think highly of them. If none of these fit then I’d say choose another pile.
I feel like this person came into your life to help you become the radiant version of yourself. They entered your life to help you find yourself, believe in yourself, and stand up for yourself. They came to bring you clarity and show you where your happiness lies. While this reading isn’t necessarily romantic, I'd still get the vibe it is/was even if I removed The Lovers. It feels like they have you under some sort of spell or have left a lasting impression on you. Music could be an important aspect here too... either they brought the music back into your life; maybe music is something you share, or they inspired you to pursue it in some format. This could be someone you thought you'd have a forever connection with (in some cases there's still hope for that), or if you know them now, there’s potential for a lifelong bond. You used to hold yourself back and hide from the world, but with this person's presence, you're now stepping out into it with full force.
They came to show you not to fear the unknown, but also to help you gain direction. The seven of spring (wands) would typically be followed by the eight of wands in the traditional tarot deck, which can signify sudden changes and actions. In this deck, the fairy on the card is in an action pose 🦸, symbolizing boldness and assertiveness. What I get from this is you’re gaining confidence and in turn everything is seemingly going to start happening at once. This person could also prevent you from standing in your own way (eight of winter).
In general, they offer you a lot of emotional support, which I feel you may really need at the moment. They make you feel loved and valued—this is someone you want in your life forever, and it feels like they will be, though this is a general reading. I think they also came to show you how to have a good time. This person might be a fling or short-lived but intense friendship, but even then, it’s the kind of experience where you'll reminisce about what you two had fondly and find yourself giggling about in old age.
PILE 2
This person could be...
Oh my gosh, I’m getting so many different things from this pile but overall I think you’ll like it.
This could be someone you knew as a kid or someone who makes you feel like a kid again. They are warm and loving. I’m getting a Cinderella situation or vibe here. Definitely some kind of monumental change or transformation is occurring or has occurred. The person you’re inquiring about could be someone you’re manifesting, and this reading has a heavily romantic tone. If that’s not what you’re looking for, consider a different pile. They could be with you or support you through a very dark time. There’s an emphasis on emotional connection, so if you don’t feel that bond and know it’s reciprocated in some formt, this might not be the group for you either.
This is someone you’ve been waiting for, or it feels like “your soul” has been waiting for. It’s hard to describe, but this person feels like a heart's wish. Whatever your long-term hopes for the future are, this person plays a role in them. For example, if you want a partner with a significant commitment, kids, and a fancy house (sorry, not the most imaginative at this moment), then this person is going to play a significant role in that.
With the card Release (traditionally Death), I feel like this person has come in when a cycle is over or very Very close to closing out, even if it doesn’t feel that way. I emphasize this because the fairy in the card is in a beautiful setting with shimmering lights above them and their eyes closed. I feel like that is you- you can’t see the transformation taking place… yet. There’s also the nine of summer (cups) following the card, where the images remind me of a coronation coupled with a fairy godmother’s transformation. So I feel like this person symbolises or marks that transition even if you don’t see it yet…. For some of you, I feel like this is still to come. I’m not fully sure how to describe what I’m picking up.
The future is being written out in small steps—steps so small you can’t tell. That’s not meant to scare you! I feel like you might be anxious about that at times. But you’re stepping into a new chapter with lovely rewards. It won’t be all sunshine and rainbows, but when you look back, you’ll remember the good times and how you overcame the bad rather than simply dwell on the bad.
I feel like good things are coming to you with this person. Messages like this can feel short, but there’s not much more to say other than congratulations. This person is loving, nurturing, chivalrous, and has a protective energy. I feel like you’ve lucked out.
I keep wanting to say I’m giving you a hug, but I see you’re already taken care of. ♥️
PILE 3
Cards: Four of Summer, Seven of Summer and King of Summer, Queen of Autumn, Life Experience
CW: I don't read about certain topics but will mention them if they come through strongly. This group briefly mentions substance use (in a sentence). There's also brief language 🙄. It's also a tough-love group...
In this group I talk about the person romantically but it can absolutely be any other kind of relationship. I did my best to include both. But if you pick this pile then you gotta stick with me because there are so many different messages in it— ready?
This reminds me of a tarot reading I watched on YouTube that mentioned being addicted to someone who has something physically or materially going for them but wasn’t emotionally available. Meanwhile, getting bored of the sweet, emotionally available, non-chaotic type of [person] that [you] need to balance you out… yeah... that’s the same vibe I’m picking up here. I was curious to see what cards would follow when the four of summer, seven of summer and king of summer came out, and as soon as I saw life experience (the tower) I immediately thought yup that's the vibe!
So there are two scenarios I’m picking up on here. This person is either the loving, emotionally available partner you need and deserve OR this person has f*ck boy (idk what the neutral term is) energy and can potentially lead you down a bad path. I kind of feel like this person whichever persona they are, they're here to push you to make a decision. In the imagery on the four of summer, there’s this child kind of like looking up pleading to an older person who is looking off into the distance. I feel like your inner child or some part of you might be begging you not to make dumb decisions. Sitting with the cards more, this person feels like they are more the 'king of cups' type mentioned above. But on your end, it's like the universe could be shining a big old spotlight on them with multiple arrows saying this person is good for you and you'd be like 'yeahhh but I want something different 🤪'. My love— don’t. It reminds me of the song Chaos Mode by DEZI. I feel like this person came into your life because you’re meant to elevate yourself and live to a certain standard (again wording, sorry) instead of repeating things that are going to leave you unstable.
I also feel like this person or type of person you go for can potentially lead you down a pathway of poor mental health and substance use and while I don’t read about substances/substance abuse if that resonates with you, please take the steps you need to get help/break out of that pattern.
You might also be overly picky. Especially if you’re into manifesting and adjacent practices. So if someone fits the bill of what you want but let’s say they don’t look like it by one detail— this person could be everything you’ve wished for personality-wise and everything you need. So it becomes a case of 'are you gonna let the good thing go because one detail is off or are you going to consider if it should legitimately be a dealbreaker'? And what I mean by little things is they look how you want minus a specific piercing or hair cut 🤨, that’s essentially what I get. Long story short, this person came in to make you make up your damn mind.
This person might not be forever either, but they may be the start. I think they’re also here to help you regain your focus on what’s important to you. I know I’ve been tearing into you this whole time (all out of love 🥰) but with the queen of autumn I feel like you have such a lovely personality and demeanour but someone or a certain set of people or event/s have distorted how you see yourself.
Overall, don’t be afraid to change and go after something better. I feel like you’ve been through something significant at some point and the person you’re inquiring about is acting as a guide to bring you to something better.
I’m sending you love, pile three 💕
PILE 4
Cards: Ego, Ten of Autumn, The High Priestess, Awakening, Nine of Autumn, Four of Autumn, Princess of Winter
This person kind of feels like they came into your life because they’re a messenger of some kind. They’re here to help aid, guide or set you on the right path to the long-term destination you seek. You’re not seeing yourself clearly right now or you’re not seeing something clearly.
They make you pause and question: Are you really in alignment? Your priorities may be off, but this person helps you get back into the right place to enjoy where you are now and what’s to come. This feels like someone who works in a profession helping others or has a safe energy to them, but at the same time, you feel wary about them. There’s an older energy to this person, or they may have been through something you’re going through and are trying to help. To summarize, they have a mentor energy.
This person has entered your life to help you trust your intuition and clear the lens through which you view life. I feel like your energy is slightly jaded, but at the same time, you may mirror each other, so it’s hard to tell which of you is rough around the edges. They might be slightly impersonal but wise. They help you do the work so you can enjoy the results. They may assist with how you view yourself and help you become more open and receptive to others.
I don’t know why, but I got an image of Scrooge—that’s what comes to mind. This person helps you go within, get clarity on one thing or another, revive you, and gain a new perspective.
#pick a card#pick a pile#pick a card reading#pac reading#pick a picture#pick a pile reading#pac#free reading tarot#cozycottagetarot#cozycottagetarot readings#tarotblr#pick an image#free tarot
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Greater Sumeru Autism Polycule
This started off as a joke and sorta spiraled outta control just a teensy tiny lil bit. Honestly I would’ve liked to have slapped a bit more on there but uh. Paper space was limited. Transcript below readmore because I know my handwriting can be difficult for some to read? (Plus extra character interpretations/headcanons in italics.)
Disaster MLM half:
Cyno - Highly competitive, except towards Nari, who he practically reveres.
Tighnari - Designated mom friend. (Tighnari is a master of knowing when to be strict and when to be soft. He doesn’t take crap from anyone, but he’s also got a very kind and caring side that encourages others to open up/be vulnerable to him. He makes sure people are taken care of.)
Alhaitham - (He is often misunderstood by others as looking down on them and does nothing to correct their misconceptions or to try and make friends, so I imagine he may have been a bit surprised to basically wake up one day and find himself surrounded by people who look past that and see him for who he is, given that he is probably Teyvat’s most introverted person. He tends to analyze and pick apart the people he likes, like he’s examining them in a petri dish, and if he cares for them he will go out of his way to do silent favors. Not one to express affection verbally (I don’t think he knows how to communicate in a way that isn’t biting and critical,) he lets his actions speak for themselves, and if the other person doesn’t pick up on it, then whatever.)
Kaveh - (An emotional wreck who gives and gives and gives and gives and gives. The people who really stick in his life in the end though are the ones who support him, rather than the other way around, even though Kaveh does his best to try and keep his multitude of problems to himself.)
Kaveh and Alhaitham: Friends to enemies to roommates to lovers? (It’s complicated.) (Tsundere x Kuudere. Teyvat’s messiest gays, hands down. There is so much more to say about them than I have the room for here.)
Cyno and Tighnari: Anthro guy and his furry boyfriend, sweet and spend as much time together as possible, co-parenting Collei. (They’re very domestic with each other. Cyno lowkey lives for competition and usually bonds with others through it, but he doesn’t really do that so much with Nari, their relationship seems to be the exception. Perhaps because Cyno thinks so highly of Tighnari and has such a tremendous amount of trust for him that he just sort of believes Tighnari will succeed at whatever he does.)
Kaveh and Cyno: Met through Tighnari, and like each other a lot. Unbeknownst to Kaveh though, Cyno sees him as a comedic rival. (And thinks he’s very pretty.) (Kaveh is unaware of this. Both the Cyno thinking he’s pretty bit, and the fact that Cyno sees him as a comedic rival. Kaveh doesn’t even try to be funny, his rants about his roommate just sort of are by default.)
Cyno and Alhaitham: Like two tomcats having a standoff (homoerotic edition.) (Haitham is not typically a competitive person, but his respect and admiration for Cyno makes him sort of an exception, and each of them r e a l l y bring out the fight in each other. I think of their relationship as being much like the one between a shounen protag (in this case Cyno) and their rival (in this case Alhaitham.) They challenge each other, bring out the best in each other and have fun in the process, and form a close bond built on a deep level of mutual respect. A.k.a if Cyno is Yugi-coded, then Alhaitham is his Kaiba.)
Alhaitham and Tighnari: Met through Kaveh, lowkey awkward and shy towards each other in a way neither really expresses. They don’t quite fully know what to make of the other, but they do like each other. (Could become something more…?) (They seem to interact the least in the group, and Tighnari’s perception of Alhaitham is probably effected by Kaveh’s endless ranting and venting, but they’re both friendly towards each other and seem to like each other. But I’d like to see them interact more directly with each other. Plus - sometimes Alhaitham needs to be told he’s being a prideful idiot - and I think Tighnari’s the only person in his life who would be able to calmly break down and explain why he’s being an idiot, and Alhaitham would be very likely to listen to him.)
Tighnari and Kaveh: Long time besties, Nari is Kaveh’s designated venting buddy and his last anchor to sanity. (Tighnari is also particularly gentle with and supportive of Kaveh.)
Wholesome WLW half:
Dehya - Tripped and ended up with three girlfriends, and brought them all together. (Dehya probably gets propositions from a lotta starstruck swooning ladies, but it’s always while she’s on the job, and she’s a professional. Plus, I hc her as demiromantic, I just get the vibe that she’d only really want to date people she already knows well. She has a very tough reputation, but is very tender with her three weed smoking gfs.)
Dunyarzad - Is very active during her Elezar recovery and often travels to visit her various girlfriends and likes to bring them gifts. (I think she loves nature, and once she’s able to more freely move and explore without the threat of being locked away, I think nothing could stop Dunyarzad from going to see as much of Sumeru as she can. Dehya often accompanies her.)
Nilou - This is what punk looks like in Sumeru. (Local artist down to overthrow the government at the drop of a hat, is stuck in a constant struggle against the Akademiya to have the right to exist as herself publicly. Nilou’s incredibly badass, actually.)
Candace - Calm and comforting, Candace herself is like an oasis in the desert to those close to her.
Dehya and Dunyarzad: Lady and her knight romance. (Their adoration for each other is clear. Dehya’s too professional to date her employer, but all bets are off once she quits.)
Dehya and Candace: Two of the desert’s toughest warriors being ridiculously cute and wholesome together.
Dehya and Nilou: Dehya not only has a lot of respect for Nilou’s nonconformity and resistance, but also finds her adorable. Takes her out often.
Dunyarzad and Nilou: Long standing friends, now go on trips together often. (Nilou’s schedule is very flexible, so she’s often down to travel with Dunyarzad at the drop of a hat, where Dehya is sometimes preoccupied with a job. Plus, they totally both end up planning future Sabzeruz festivals together.)
Dunyarzad and Candace: Met through Dehya and quickly became close. Dunyarzad has a type, and it’s sweet yet badass women.
Candace and Nilou: Nilou’s always the most successful at getting Candace to step away from her duties in Aaru village and go have fun with everyone. (The others really don’t know how she does it.)
Aaaand the couple of bridges between:
Kaveh and Nilou: Unbreakable bond of the only two art kids in Sumeru. (Pls hoyo I need them to interact in canon.)
Alhaitham and Dehya: Alhaitham has a one-sided crush on Dehya, (and occasionally invites her to TCG nights,) while Dehya thinks he’s the weirdest friend she has. (I hc Alhaitham as the kind of bisexual guy who’s 99% attracted to men with like One Buff Woman thrown in there because. Frankly. I think it adds a really funny extra dimension to their relationship. Haitham has never met anyone as forthright and honest as Dehya, and admires that about her. Dehya would never reciprocate his feelings in a million years, she values him as a friend, but also finds him snooty and insufferable at times, and struggles to understand him largely because of the vast cultural/communication style gap between Akademiya scholars and Eremite mercenaries, though this is somewhat bridged by the fact that both of them are extremely honest, blunt, and upfront about what they think. Despite their differences, they are a fun duo.)
#genshin impact#kaveh#alhaitham#cyno#tighnari#dehya#nilou#candace#dunyarzad#kavetham#haikaveh#cynari#cytham#haino#kavenari#4ggravate#dehyarzad#candehya#uhhhhh I’m not aware of ship names for the rest of these pairings so I’ll just leave it at that#coloring’s a bit messy bc this was in my sketchbook and though moleskine CAN handle watercolor it is not ideal#although tbh I’m. Often not completely happy w/ how my face coloring turns out of darker skinned characters#and when I am happy with it I feel like it photographs weird.#and I’ve been trying to work on that for how long now?????#maybe I need to find/make better paints or maybe I need to get gud. Probably both#cherallart
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