#šššš„²š„²
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More of psycho Dan š¤Ŗš¤Ŗ
#bastille#daniel smith#dan smith#danyul sniff#bastille dan#fuck I keep forgetting to post everything#life is so shitty atm#šššš„²š„²
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Because even in between the dark thingsā¦ thereās something broken in me.
#my art#iwtv#Claudia iwtv#claudia de pointe du lac#delainey hayles#interview with the vampire#iwtv amc#artists on tumblr#digital art#fanart#this started as me wanting to do some quick free hand portraits of the cast from some of the promo pics#but I started with claudia and then I just couldnāt stop š„²#going into the upcoming episodes with such mixed emotions bc I know her fate and I dread it#but at the same time Iām looking forward to seeing delainey do it justice#itās gonna break me š
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heās actually a menace (affectionate) š«
#tw flashing#lee felix#skz#enjoy 1:25 of felix struggling to keep his top on š#he looked so good i donāt know how ill ever recover š„²#loml
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TAIRA x PYO ā¢
#Observation Diary#I napped after work and now itās 2am and Iām awake šš„²#Also this art is so amazing but itās super~ like it doesnāt read well in B&W š but I still wanna post it šššš
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Most Wanted Tour š¢
#Hiiiiiiiš#TumblrTerminatedMe...Againš#MyLastPostWasAboutFishing#LikeAreYou4realzeez#IGottaStopPostingDickIGuessš„²#Anyways..ProbablyMyLastRunWithThis#Me
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pictures i want to save from my unfinished grandmacore/fairytale island! this is the second time ive started this theme and then given it up so i guess it really wasnt meant to beš„² but maybe these can inspire me or someone else and lead to other ideasšš
#cries in acnh burnoutš„²#but i saved an unfinished da so i guess it wasnt all for nothingā¦#for a few weeks i was so in love with this theme#but i left it for a long time and couldnt get back into it!#it happens i guessš#acnh#animal crossing#animal crossing new horizons#new horizons#acnh island#acnh exterior#acnh grandmacore#acnh fairytale island#acnh cozy#acnh soft#acnh forest#acnh landscaping#acnh unfinished island#yarn island
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I Need Your Help...
CW/ mpreg, language, slight angst (people saying harsh things to/about each other that they donāt really mean because theyāre hurt and are stupid dumb idiots that are bad at communicatingš„ŗš)
Pt. 2
"Here we go," F0rd finally said after sifting through one of the cupboards in the small kitchen and pulling out a can. He chucked it St@n's way, the latter reflexively catching it like he'd been tossed a baseball. "I could warm it up if you'd rather, but it'll take the stove a bit to heat up."
St@nley turned the can in his fingers as he studied the label. Baron NumNums High Flyinā Pork 'n Beans. 'Not exactly kosher, S1xer,' he almost joked aloud, but kept his mouth shut. It's not something that mattered to himself, anyway. Not anymore.
"Nah, it's fine like it is." he assured as he pulled out a pocket knife. He could practically feel the curious look his brother was giving him as he dug the blade into the lid of the can, making quick work of popping it open and eagerly dipping the spoon he'd been given into it's contents.
Though he wouldn't outright admit it... he was absolutely FAMISHED. So much so he basically shuddered in delight at the mere taste as he popped the first bite into his mouth. 'Finally, something NOT terrible for once!' he thought euphorically. It was by no means a spectacular meal, but to an empty stomach it was manna from heaven.
As he slowly came down from his dopamine high, he noticed F0rd still fumbling through the other cabinets like he had a bad case of tunnel vision. As he studied him, it was only now that St@nley got the chance to really see the scrawny and disheveled state his brother was in. How sluggish his movements were. How pale and gaunt his face was. And his handsā¦ What was the cause for how beaten up they were?... The man looked like he hadnāt had a full nightās sleep in weeks.
āThatāsā¦ not a good sign..,ā St@nley thought, the already existing concern amplified tenfold the longer he looked at him. He cleared his throat awkwardly in an attempt to get his attention. "Hey, uh... why dontcha sit down with me, eh? Get some food in ya? Tell me what's goin' on? I don't mean to be so frank but... You look like hell, Stanf0rd."
"Ah... later," he mused, still distracted by whatever he was searching for. In the midst of his search, his fingers grazed the forming bruise on the left side of his jaw. He opened and closed his mouth experimentally, feeling out the source of a dull yet stubborn pang in his mouth. "I think you broke one of my molars."
"ā¦ Right... yeah," St@n chuckled dryly, "uh... sorry 'bout that, by the way..."
"Besides, you're one to talk," he barked, glazing right over St@n's curt apology, "You're not exactly a sight to behold yourself, you know. AND you've currently got a stowaway to worry about." He closed the cupboard door and turned to go to the next room. "Stay here, I'll be back."
St@nley rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time that day. "Bettin' on itā¦" As soon as F0rd disappeared around the corner, he shot a look to the far end of the table, where the journal lay, and scowled. There were still so many questions he had yet to be answered. He just had to figure out how to get his brother to talk.
For a few minutes F0rd could faintly be heard rummaging through a few drawers, all the while muttering a short 'Now where is the damn thing?..,ā and āI swear it was here last time..,ā before he finally let out a mildly triumphant 'Aha!'
When he returned to the kitchen, he'd brought with him a small, worn briefcase (what was, upon setting it onto the table and flipping it open, revealed to be a decently stocked yet obviously thrown-together first aid kit). "Okay, pull up your shirt. Let me see your shoulder."
Letting out a small exasperated breath, St@n carefully (being VERY mindful of how he moved his sore shoulder) wriggled out of his jacket and pulled the back of his shirt up over his shoulders, bunching it up around his neck.
F0rd went to wash his hands, then stepped around and behind his brother to better assess the damage. He winced empathetically as he looked it over.
The burn took up the entirety of his shoulder blade, nearly touching the center of his back. It had to be at least 2nd if not 3rd degree, as the skin was already starting to tighten around the edges of the mark that was left... angryā¦ inflamed... Even worse, though, was the unconventional shape of what was most definitely going to become a scar later.
And yet another reminder of how far they'd grown apart...
His brother had basically been branded with an alchemic sigil.
Because of him, there was now a permanent reminder of their earlier fight...
"How bad is it?" St@n's question rang, pulling F0rd from his thoughts.
"Hmm... well... it's, uh..."
"Gonna leave a mark?"
"No doubt about it." He took a moment to grab a washcloth and soaked one of it's corners in soapy water. "I'm gonna have to clean it so it doesn't get infected. It's not gonna feel great, but just-"
"Save the explanation, brainiac," St@n interrupted, mouth full from the latest spoonful of beans. "Iāve been through this song and dance before. Do what you have to, I can deal. Just hurry it up, would ya? It's cold in here."
Now it was F0rd's turn to roll his eyes. And despite himself, a slight smirk pulled at the corner of his lips. 'As brawny and bullheaded as ever, St@nley..,ā he thought amusedly as he began lightly dabbing at the wound. Heād reached the center of the mark where the burn was at its worst when the small sound of his brother hissing through his teeth made him pause. "St@n..?"
"It's fine... don't sweat it..."
Guilt ate at him, at the prospect of causing his brother any more physical pain than he had already, but he continued cleaning as gently as he could. It simply had to be done.
Once he was satisfied he'd properly disinfected the area, F0rd reached back into the kit, pulled out the bacitracin, and applied it generously to the surface of the burn before topping it off with a sterile pad. It was a very basic mend, he figured, but it would have to do. It was only as he continued working that he realized they'd suddenly fallen quiet again. And while the silence wasnāt necessarily uncomfortable, there was still a level of tension that couldnāt be entirely ignored.
As he went to unroll a bundle of gauze, his eyes unintentionally bounced towards St@nley's belly. Judging by the sheer size of it, as it occupied most of the space in his lap, it was obvious he had to be nearing full term... a thought that greatly unsettled his nerves the more he lingered on itā¦ Nevertheless, he decided to pry.
"So, um... When did you find out?"
"āFind out?ā"
"About your... situation." he clumsily clarified while he wrapped the gauze around St@nās shoulder and across his back and chest.
St@nley made a small sound of acknowledgement, drumming his fingers on the surface of the table as he carefully decided his wording. After a moment of thought, a deep sigh dragged itself from his chest. He set his now empty can down and then cradled his chin with his palm as he leaned onto the table on his elbow. "I think... about the first week of September."
āOHā¦ā Only 4 months ago?? āOh wow, so you were already a ways along thenā¦ā
āYup. I'd been feeling... yāknow... off for a while before that, but I just figured Iād caught some crazy flu bug or something during a, uh..,ā St@n hesitated, reevaluating, āā¦ freelance job. Was sick as shit for WEEKS. I couldn't keep anything down, didn't have the energy to even keep myself upright...ā He grimaced. āGod, it was awful, Fordā¦ I swore I felt like I couldāve keeled over at the drop of a hatā¦ And then when I finally, FINALLY thought I'd gotten past it, I started feeling... weird."
F0rd tore off a couple strips of medical tape to secure the wrapping. "Weird?..," he repeated.
"Well... it was hard to place the words at the time, but the best way I could describe it was that it kinda felt like my insides were rearranging themselves. It spooked me enough to seek out a back alley physician, anyway.ā
It took everything in him for F0rd to hold his tongue at that revelation, but he stayed silent as his brother explained.
āDidn't have high hopes for an accurate diagnosis, but... Well, how hard would a basic check up be?? Worst case scenario I either got an answer or I didnāt. Not to mention he was dirt cheap. Beggars can't be choosersā¦ā He made an ironically amused sound, āSo imagine my surprise when the doc told me I was roughly 18 weeks..."
āIā¦ imagine that news wasnāt exactly anticipatedā¦ā
St@nley shook his head lightly. "Needless to say, I called the guy a quack and left. I didnāt want to believe it at first... I couldnātā¦ Hell, itās not like I even showed that much. I mean, Iāve always had some heft to my person, so a little extra gut didnāt make me question anythingā¦ But considering everything that lead up to thenā¦ it all sorta lined up... Then wouldn't ya know it, a handful of positive corner store pregnancy tests laterā¦ turned out the fucker was right."
F0rd finished checking over the bandaging before finally pulling out a chair to sit across from his brother, folding his arms over the table (atop the journal, St@nley noted, still somewhat guarded in manner). His eyes, though exhausted and bothered, remained inquisitive. āSo, thenā¦ that sensation you were talking about?.. Was that..?ā
"Ohā¦ yeah,ā St@n lightly chuckled, giving the side of his belly a gentle pat, āthat was just junior here figuring out they have legsā¦ and they have NOT let me forget it, either." The small smile on his face faltered. "But, uh... yeahā¦ I've been trying to keep track of the weeks ever since..."
F0rd hummed his acknowledgement, nodding lightly as he processed the information he'd just been given. Then another question, though it was more of an observation in the form of a question. "You've been going about this alone, havenāt you?ā¦"
St@nley lulled his head to the side, his tired expression wordlessly yet clearly asking, 'What's it look like, genius?..ā
He pointedly left it at that. Then F0rdās face fell as another revelation came to mind. "Wait.... You've not been to a doctor SINCE?? It's January, St@nley! That means..." He paused, brows furrowing as he only now took the time to do the math. "Oh my God, you're-"
āāAbout to pop,ā" St@n finished as he pulled his shirt back down over his torso (a task easier said than done). "Yes, I'm WELL aware of that notion, poindexter. Glad weāre clear on that."
āBut what if something happened? What if something went wrong?? You couldāve been seriously hurt, you knucklehead!ā F0rd scolded, gesturing vaguely in his brotherās direction. āOr WORSE!!ā
"Donāt you think I KNOW that??!" St@n sighed, trying to reign in the sudden burst of frustration. "Look, I... I've not exactly had the luxury of having prenatal care at my disposal, alright?.. I went to a friggin' doc in a box ONE other time for anemia and it took about every penny I had to my name. Believe me, had the option been available to me, I would've made a point to go in a heartbeatā¦ but if I expected to make ends meet on a day to day basis..,ā he hung his head lower, eyeing the floor, āā¦ there was just no way..."
F0rd let out a tense breath. "I'm just saying... It's not a good idea to let a pregnancy go unchecked for so long. And then coming all the way out here was dangerous... Who knows who or what you could've run into on the way??"
"Eh... it's arguably safer than where I was before... In fact, if I'm being completely honest, this trip might've just saved my life..." he admitted, his free hand absentmindedly cradling the underside of his belly, "or at least bought me some time..."
"What's that supposed to mean??"
St@n debated over whether or not he should open that can of worms... so he decided he'd keep it brief. "Let's just say I was half expecting to get my head caved in any day now, had I decided to stick around Dead End..." He cast a glance that suggested the subject be dropped.
F0rd's eyes briefly widened in unease. He then pressed them shut as he pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation. "Dear God, St@nley..," he sighed. He didnāt even have it in him right then to ask for any further elaboration.
The room was quiet during their intermission, as they gave themselves time to debrief.
Then, allowing himself an intentionally long, drawn out breath, St@nley leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. "Alright, your turn."
"Hm?" F0rd looked back up warily.
"I gave you my sob story, let's hear yours!"
"'Sob story?'ā his tone took an air of offense to it, āIāll have you know this is a very serious matter!"
āSo I've heardā¦ā
F0rd scowled at the blatant sarcasm. āI mean it, St@nley! This is something so much bigger than you or I! It could mean the end of effectively everything as we know it!ā
"Okay then, ENLIGHTEN me! It's what I've been trying to get you to do this whole frigginā time! Just tell me whatās going on, without all the cryptic bullshit! Why did you need me to come here just to send me away again, Stanf0rd?" He quickly reached for and snatched the journal out from under his brother's arms, waving it carelessly in front of him. "And what's so damn important about this book that you need it gone but not destroyed?? If it's SO dangerous, why not just shred the thing??" He punctuated his short tangent by dropping the leatherback loudly in the center of the table, the booming sound making his brother flinch.
"I already told you!" F0rd said as he picked it back up with both hands, "The information recorded in these journals is much too valuable to destroy. However, to ensure it stays out of the wrong hands, it must be taken away from here... it could be disastrous if that happens... And the only other person that I could have entrusted to take it flat out refuses to speak to me!..," his gaze landed on the journal he held, his reflection stared back from the emblem in the center. "... You were my last resort... The last hope I have of ever fixing the mess I've caused..." He looked back up to his brother. "And that's why it's of the utmost importance to take this thing FAR away from here as SOON as humanly possible!"
"Mm-hm..." St@n ran his hands along the length of his face. āYeah, see, I just donāt understand what good squirreling this thing away in some hole on the other side of the planet is gonna do. 'Bury it where no one can find it??' I could just chuck this thing over a mountainside in the Rockies and it'd be dealt with!" He readjusted himself in his seat, straightening up. "But more importantly, what I'd like to know is who these 'wrong hands' are referring to. The mob? The government?? Are you saying someone's got a hit on you??"
Stanf0rd groaned, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. "You don't get it, St@nley..."
āWhen do I ever?..,ā he thought bitterly, his patience growing ever thinner the longer he prodded. He swore he could get more answers out of a goddamn brick wall.
"It HAS to be taken far enough away that it can't be stumbled upon by just any passersby. And if I were to go hide it myself, I'd be wasting valuable time that I need to prepare for what's coming! I have to make it out to the ruins before the snowfall covers the only entrance to the caves! And if I don't go IMMEDIATELY, there might not be another chance to do anything before..,ā might as well not beat around the bush any longer, āhe brings forth complete and utter chaos!"
At that, there was a beatā¦ then St@nley made a tired noise, rubbing his temples. āOkayā¦ alrightā¦ coolā¦ā His head was beginning to hurt now. "Juuuust leave it to ol' S1xer to make the explanation confusing-"
āDo NOT call me by that name!!ā came a sudden, visceral interjection, making St@n nearly jump out of his skin.
All the energy in the room came to a screeching halt.
Breathing heavily for a minute, and seeing the startled confusion etched into his brotherās face, F0rd realized he'd lashed out and visibly shrunk in his seat. "I... sorry, it's not... that wasnātā¦ y-you didn't know, I... Gosh, I'm sorry..." he babbled, avoiding eye contact, "I don't know what came over me..." The shame he felt was unbearableā¦ To think he let himself get so worked up over something so silly as a nicknameā¦ all because of-ā¦
It was only when the sound of his brother gently rapping on the table, to get his attention, registered that he dared look back up to face him.
As he leaned forward on the table, arms folded tightly underneath him, St@nley's demeanor had shiftedā¦ no trace of sarcasm left to be seen. "Who did this to you, F0rd?..." There was an intensity in his voice that was equal parts steadying and intimidating, his eyes meeting his brother's and locking. Though it obviously wasn't directed at himself, F0rd could swear there was a murderous glint in that gaze... āWho's threatening you?... Who scared you so badly that you're taking these drastic measures??..."
"I..." F0rd suddenly felt so transparent, like he was being read like a bookā¦ Somehow St@nley had managed to just about hit the nail on the headā¦ He covered his face, beginning to feel overwhelmed. There was so much he wanted to explain in full... but could he without endangering either his brother or himself?? Or rather, could he explain himself without sounding like a total madman??
āWho used that name and tarnished it, Stanf0rd??ā¦ā
āI-I..,ā he stuttered, breaking, "I can't... Th-There's simply no way for me to explain everything for you to understand!"
"Then HELP me to understand!ā St@nley pleaded, at his witsā end. It hurt him so badly to see his brother so utterly tormented with no way for him to get through to or comfort him. He HAD to get through to himā¦ somehow! āHELP me! Iām really, really, REALLY tryinā here, F0rd, but you're not giving me anything to work off of! I sound like a fucking broken record saying this shit! I care about you, you dumbass, Iām your BROTHER! So you can't keep leaving me in the dark! You have to trust me! Please just trust me, Stanf0rd!"
Trust me...
Those two little words that heād heard time and time againā¦ those two words that, to him, had lost every ounce of sincerity due to the sheer amount theyād been used and squandered by so very many people in his lifeā¦ Hearing those two words suddenly agitated F0rd to no end.
He looked his brother in the face and scoffed, "OH, no! NO!! YOU, of all people, don't get to go preaching to ME about TRUST, Mr. 'Buy my products, they won't do you wrong! I'm just your humble, neighborhood salesman who ISNāT a shyster whatsoever! Did I tell you to buy my products yet??āā
The deer-in-the-headlights look St@n gave him only managed to light a fire under him as he desperately took the chance to redirect the attention away from himself.
"Yeah, thatās right, St@nley! Or should I refer to you by one of your ridiculous aliases like 'P@nley St1ne's??' ā¦ 'P@NLEY,' St@nley?! You couldn't come up with anything better than that?!" He shook his head, getting sidetracked, "My point is, I've seen what you've been up to over the years! In fact there's been no way to avoid seeing it! I've seen the ads in the papers! The commercials! The... 'products,' if you could even call them that! I've SEEN how you've scammed people! How youāve LIED to people! Hell, if I didn't just see your bare belly l'd have half a mind to assume you stuffed a damn pillow up your shirt in a shoddy attempt to fool me!"
St@nley stared at him in disbelief, mouth slightly agape. The rest of what his brother said hurt well enough, but that last part?? "What in the-... Where on EARTH did you get that idea, Stanf0rd?? Do you you realize how completely DEMEANING that accusation is?? What could I possibly hope to gain?? Faking THIS??" he exclaimed, aggressively gesturing to himself with his hands bracketing his burgeoning middle.
"I don't know, SYMPATHY?? Some twisted method of MANIPULATION?? Seems like something a con-man such as yourself wouldn't think twice about exploiting!"
St@n reeled back as though he'd been struck. That one got him. "... Is that really what you think of me??..,ā came an uncharacteristically quiet tone, "Do you really think I'd try and pull a fast one on you in your time of need??..."
As much as he hated himself for it, as much as F0rd KNEW he shouldnāt say it, the instinctive desire to get the last word in overruled whatever rational response he should have spoutedā¦ and a venomous response slipped out before he could stop himself. ā... Frankly, I wouldn't put it past you..."
St@nley stared down at the floor for several moments, processing everything that had just been laid out before him. To think his own brother thought so little of him... Sure, what he'd said was vaguely in line with the truth, regarding his grifting record. Conning strangers for his own benefit was one thing, albeit not a great thing and certainly not something he was proud of, but it was something he simply had to resort to to make ANY kind of basic livingā¦ To trick his family though?... his own BROTHER?? To suggest he'd even go so far as to fake a pregnancy of all things just to tug at his heartstrings... that was a low even he didn't think he could bring himself to sink to.
In that moment, it was made clear to him; After everything he suffered for, everything he tried in vain to atone for, and after over a DECADE of radio silence... his brother still held to that idea that he was this selfish, deceitful, untrustworthy monster...
The regret was immediate as soon as the words left Stanf0rdās lips. Whyād he have to go and say that? With stakes as high as they were, for more reasons than one, stirring the pot was the last thing he needed to do and yetā¦ "I... St@nley, I... I-I didn't mean-ā¦"
After a minute of brooding, St@n scooped his jacket off the floor, snaking his arms back through it's sleeves as he finally stood up from his chair. "Y'know what? That's it. I donāt care anymore. I'm done."
ā'Done??' What do you mean 'DONE??'ā His eyes keenly followed him as he passed by. "St@nley, where are you going?"
"Whatās it to you? Itās not like you actually wanted me here. After all, I was your last resort, right?ā his voice was monotone as he made his way to the front doorā¦ emptyā¦ hurtā¦ āAs always, Stanf0rd Filbr1ck P1nes, you were right. I shouldnāt āve comeā¦ I shouldnāt āve botheredā¦ā
Stanf0rd immediately got up and grasped the fabric of St@nās sleeve, holding him in place. āNow hang on a minute, would you please just listen to me for a second??ā
Try as he had to keep the rage bottled up, that was the last straw. āYeah, sure... Or how 'bout this?ā Smacking the hand off his jacket sleeve, St@nley turned on his heel, scornfully wagging his pointer finger in his brother's face, prompting the latter to back up a step. āYou listen here, and you listen GOOD, smartass! I don't need you lecturing me, REMINDING me of how shitty a person I am! I KNOW I'M A SCREW UP, STANF0RD! I KNOW that!! Preaching to the freakin' choir on that front!" He looked down at himself and laughed a humorless laugh. "I mean hell, just LOOK at me! I'm knocked up with some bastard-not-worth-the-air-he-breathes' bastard! All with no place to call home! That's fuck up incarnate, amirite??"
F0rd began to respond but was abruptly cut off.
āAnd hereās another thing you were right about; the WHOLE-ASS drive up here and how much it absolutely SUCKED! Over thirteen-fucking-HUNDRED miles on the road is no place to be when youāre essentially a walking, talking time bomb! The whole drive, the whole drive, I've had this crippling, nagging fear at the back of my brain telling me Iād likely end up hopelessly lost! Or, better YET, reminding me of the possibility that Iād might have to pull over at some point and spit this kid out on the side of the road without any help! Do you know how terrifying that thought was, F0rd?? When youāre trying to navigate those insanely long back roads nobody knows about, all on your own?? And all for the sake of showing up when your brother asked for you to, because you foolishly thought he actually NEEDED you?? OF COURSE YOU DONāT!! Cuz that WASN'T you, that wasn't YOUR problem, and thus it doesnāt MATTER!! The world revolves around YOU, and anyone else's issues can go ahead and take a back seat for all you care, isnāt that right??"
āSt@nley, stop it! Youāre becoming hysterical!ā F0rd attempted to reason, wanting desperately to diffuse the situationā¦ Needless to say, it was fruitlessā¦
āNO!! Because you wanna know what else?? NEWSFLASH, brother, YOU'RE not perfect either! You act like you're āGod's gift to the populaceā or something when you're NOT! It's not like you ever bothered to help ME out when I needed somebody! Iāve only ever had myself for the better part of 10 years, so it wouldāve been nice for you to, I dunno, check in once or twice! Or at least a throw out some bullshit 'Hey, bro! Hope you're alive and doing alright! I can't talk or meet with you right now, and frankly I probably don't WANT to, but I hope you know l've not forgotten about you and that somewhere deep down I still love you! Take care, St@nley!' for some semblance of caring! Just SOMETHING!! Some acknowledgment that I EXIST!! That-That Iām not just a-a-a STAIN left behind!! So WHY?? Why did I care?? Why did I think-..?!" He froze when his voice suddenly cracked, cutting him off before he could continue.
Now noticing how hazy his vision had become, how shaky his hands were, he was horrified to realize that he'd burst into tears partway through his rant. All the repressed emotions were starting to show face... 'Humiliated' couldn't even BEGIN to cover how he felt right then... And when he finally studied the expression F0rd currently wore, he felt like he might vomit.
That all too familiar look of pure, unadulteratedā¦ pityā¦ The physical embodiment of āOh you poor, pathetic thing...ā
St@nley DESPISED that lookā¦ Itād been one heād received countless, countless times in his life. And while he knew that more often than not the intent behind that expression was never truly out of ill meaning, the immense degradation it brought him was suffocating. He couldnāt bear to see it another secondā¦ especially coming from his own flesh and blood. He squeezed his eyes shut to escape it.
F0rd, meanwhile, was at a complete loss for words. What could he say? What should he say?? How could he explain the sheer magnitude of whatās been going on that didnāt sound like the utter ramblings of a man whoās lost his mind?? How could he convince St@nley to put aside their personal issues for a second and help aid him in fixing this mess?? Important things needed attending to!! This was a matter of the fate of the WORLD, dammit!! The livelihood of effectively EVERYONE!!
But thenā¦ his brotherās points made him reflectā¦ What of his brotherās woes?ā¦ St@nleyās woes??... The woes of the person who, at one point in time, meant MORE to him than the world itself??ā¦ Did they not matter in the grander scheme?? The hardships St@nley had gone through completely alone, left unbeknownst to him just because heā¦ couldn't bring himself to reach out and see how his brother was actually doing?.. Simply because he couldn't bear the thought of truly knowing how rough he had it in life while they were apart?..
Assuming St@nley was just wandering aimlessly around all this time, without a care or ounce of respect for anyone in the world, made ignoring those painful thoughts so much easier... Knowing what he did now, he suddenly felt sick to his stomach.
For so long, Stanf0rd had spent every waking hour pouring over his research, dragging himself along through countless sleepless nights, pushing anyone and everyone away... out of his mind... out of his heart... all to combat an omniscient evil he still frustratinglyā¦ didnāt quite understand yet, himself... His work had completely and utterly consumed him. Heād lost sight of what few allies he hadā¦ He'd lost sight of his familyā¦ And loathe as he was to admit it, perhaps in this mission to āsave humanity,ā he actually lost sight of his ownā¦
As he concluded his thought, one thing was made painfully clearā¦ Somehow, one way or another, both his brother and himself had each come to face some form of isolationā¦
They really were two sides of the same coin...
Taking a moment to steel himself again, St@n pressed the heel of his hand against one eye and then the other, wiping away the tears that managed to run down his cheeks. "I should've known better than to think I could ever be of any help to you... of any value to you... So Iāll do you the courtesy of getting the hell outta your hair. For good this time.ā
āSt@nleyā¦ā
āCan it!ā St@nley swiftly snatched the duffle bag off the floor and turned to grab the doorknob, then called out over his shoulder. "Oh yeah, one last thing! Thank you EVER so much for the new 'tattoo!' What better souvenir to remember your estranged brother by than one that's been burned directly into your skin, eh? Your hospitality is truly unmatched, Stanf0rd. TRULY." He re-zipped his jacket and yanked the door open. "See ya never, fuck head," he spat before he slammed the door behind him.
"Hey! HEY!! St@nley, WAIT!!" F0rd followed close behind, storming his way to the door and ripping it back open about as quickly as it was shut. "Damnit St@nley, would you just hold on a second and hear me out-AH!.," he gasped, flinching when he'd almost ran into his brother from behind.
St@n had stopped short on the porch, motionless.
Huffing, he sternly maneuvered around to the right of his brother to face him from the side. āPlease, think rationally! You know as well as I do that you have no business running around in the condition youāre in! Look, I get that youāre upset, alright?? Iām sorry! I really am! But you canāt just skip off and..,ā he trailed off when he realized St@n was staring straight ahead over the front yard, the look on his face unreadable. He tentatively followed the trajectory of his line of sight, only to freeze in place himself. āā¦ leaveā¦ā
Their wide eyed expressions mirrored each otherās, standing parallel as they both gazed at the sight before them.
Snow had piled up by several feet. MUCH higher than it had been earlier . Within just a few hours it had gone from knee height to probably high enough to halfway submerge a person. In the distance, only the rough shape of El Diablo was visible, having a thick cocoon of snow encompassing the body of the vehicle.
And the snow just KEPT coming.
There was no getting out in thatā¦
St@n groaned defeatedly, burying his face in his hands. āWhatever higher power has it out for me can kindly kiss my assā¦ā
TBC
#mpreg#mpreg fic#not kink#PaternityF@lls-St@n#INeedYourHelpFic#Would someone KINDLY explain to me howst the FUCK I went from writing a silly MPREG fic#to writing out a whole goddamn brothers' quarrel#HELP???#HOW DID WE GET HERE???#WHY DID I SPEND A WHOLE WEEK ON THIS PIECE IF SHIT???#THEY MAKE ME SIIIIICK#But uh... anyway#The jerks are just being jerks to each other#don't worry about itš„²#I promise -I PROMISE- they'll be nice to each other EVENTUALLY#They both got over a decade's worth of issues to work out that they've not been to therapy for#what better way to be forced to talk it out than being SNOWED IN? Now that's FREE therapy!!#Tell me what y'all think! Did i try to pack too much here??#Probably... oh wellš
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bestie wake up
new pepe laughter clips just dropped
#<333333#aaaaaaa baby#he was very cute in this#even tho i felt like he was barely in it š„²#i miss him#cant wait til the weekend to see him again#also sorryyyyy but i love the little knuckle cracking#ššš#f2#pepe marti
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TGCF (Yizhan version)
"I am forever your most devoted believer"
#oh this visionš„²#yizhan as hualian#maybe in another time and space#or maybe just in my dreamsš#yizhan#xiao zhan#wang yibo#bjyx
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The last time Zhu had seen that bracelet around Ouyangās wrist, heād been trembling half-naked at her feet as she hurt him. Helped him. But her help hadnāt been enough. It had been the analgesic applied to a battlefield casualty who had already lost too much blood to survive. She would change the world, but it would come too late for him. An unfamiliar feeling was lurking in her chest. She identified it, with difficulty, as sadness.
He Who Drowned The World, chapter 21
#anyway#how are we feeling on this fine sunday#i already hungover cried abt this once today š„²š#he who drowned the world#the radiant emperor#zhu/ouyang#zhu&ouyang
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the fact that me, as a fan of both lando and oscar without any bias (maybe a bit on lando but not that much), is going to witness both "oscar fans, lando antis" and "lando fans, oscar antis" posts all in my one dash š„²š„²
also the fact that atp i couldn't even bother enough with this same situation on both lewis and george. now it happens on lando and oscar as well which got me like....
#landoscar#lando norris#oscar piastri#f1#maybe i need to admit atp rn that#this sport is just not built for a person like me istg šš#like....i miss the moments 2 years ago where what i only care the most is only football and football only#and couldn't even give a fuck more about guys being in circles vroom vroom#i mean thank god that there's a bayern match just now right after the race ended#which really liften my mood up and distract myself a bit from intimidating discourse and whatsoever#hmmmm ngl maybe the fact that being a football football fan in general especially in this website really brings a comfort in me#meanwhile for f1...idk why but everything about it (especially during race and after race) really overwhelms me a lot seriously speaking#maybe the fact that football is more team oriented sport#meanwhile f1 is more individual oriented despite there are teams consists of 2 individuals#and the fact that me supporting multiple individuals in a one same team despite that f1 is individual oriented sport#kinda gets me digging my own grave atp tbh#i mean when i said individual oriented sport...it kinda means that in a perspective of most of the f1 fans#and now seeing all every kinds of discourse on my dash really makes me overwhelming a lot i'm ngl#that the fact that i couldn't able to curate my own preference for this f1blr space on my dash š„²š„²š„²#goddddd srsly tho i just want to turn back time where i only cares about bayern frankfurt and germany nt only ffs š« š« š« š« #but yeah who am i to turn around the past šš...and plus that once i'm getting into one hyperfixation there's no turning back at all for me#so yeah#goddddd i'm so sorry but i'm just being so fucking messy rn#like all the things that i see on my dash really exhausts my brain and my thought process forreal i really need to throw up forreal srsly :(
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Xie Lian: Guys itās a shooting star, letās make a wish!
Hua Cheng: I wish for all of Gege's wishes to come true.
Mu Qing: Simp.š
Hua Cheng: Never mind, I wish upon the shooting star to fall down at a 30Ā° velocity aiming for Mu Qing. .)
Xie Lian: San Langā¦š„²
#guess who's back for this monthš#i figured I'd just make my own sort-of-not-really-but-whatever adventkalender#by just posting daily for a while again until my exams come for meš„²#anyway#heaven official's blessing#tgcf#tian guan ci fu#incorrect quotes#incorrect tgcf quotes#hualian#xie lian#hua cheng#mu qing
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god forbid women have hobbies
#reposting bc the first one had a mistake šŖšš„²#falin dungeon meshi#dunmesh spoilers#dunmeshi#delicious in dungeon#chimera falin#falin touden#dunmeshi falin
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Imola recap
Me the entire race
Me the last 4 laps
Thatās it thank you
We got yoints
No one got buried in the gravel
Nextttt
#lando norris#mclaren#max verstappen#red bull racing#this wasnāt delusion like lando actually had a chance it was so close#edged and edged and for what tho š#not max wining the 24 hr thing right before like we get it your a supreme being#I think max was happy he got some competition#oscar piastri#Oscarās never ending struggle of staring at a rear wing for an entire race#free my man#ferarri#Ferrari was decent I guess#yuki tsunoda#yoints#miami gp 2024#imola 2024#overall snooze fest yay š„²
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helloooo from the abyss!!! i got a job offer today!!! why am i so scared !!!!!!!!!!
#me to my go-to agony aunt colleague:#š§š»āāļø i want my mummy#i have been at this company for 6 yrs and mb deeply unhappy for 1 year with small breaks of sun thru the clouds#and it is time for me to go!!!! but why does my tummy hurt!!!!!!!#and it is less about owing them anything and more abt being soooso cosy in the comfort zone.... except when im crying and stressed and#grinding my teeth as i sleep due to stress which is new!!!#anyway i hope this means finally getting back some time to do my real job (bono blog)#once i.... turn down an internal offer that i only went for bc they dangled a smidge of a salary increase in front of me#and i hand my notice in šØ#ššµāš«š«Øšš„²#miss u all btw if u even care š
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Pssstā¦.is anyone still down bad for Miguel OāHara? š¤š
#I thought I wasā¦.#and then a hot edit of him on TikTok reminded me of what Iām missing out on š„²š#I miss my big back (no literally his back is SCRUMDELICIOUS) angy kitty#smooch smooch to those who are living strong for our hunk of a man āš¼š«¶š¼#miguel o'hara#atsv#silly 2am thoughts
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