#⥂ verse.  ╱  crack on.
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fanaticalthings · 9 months ago
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the muskification of twitter except it's lex luthor instead of elon lol
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hotchilipeppers · 2 years ago
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mossgoblins · 2 months ago
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At least it tracks well with clients, so we’re looking good for next quarter lads.
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spicycinnabun · 11 months ago
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“Steve, something is wrong with Christofern!” Eddie entered Steve’s room, cradling the potted plant in his arms.
He’d come home after work, ready to greet his bud-dy, but one look at him had made Eddie gasp. His leaves were shriveled up like sad little green raisins. Usually, they were puffed up like oversized Rice Krispies.
Christofern had been Robin’s, originally. It had been in a very sorry state on her windowsill before she’d left for college—a lot worse than it looked now, under Eddie’s care, thank you—and she’d told him, “I honestly can’t stand the thing. You keep it. It sheds worse than my aunt’s Great Pyrenees, and I’m tired of vacuuming. Just don’t throw it out, or Steve might murder you.”
And that had been that.
Christofern didn’t look like a typical house plant. He wasn’t a fern, which Steve kept reminding him. Steve was more practical. He didn’t give his plants names but called them by their designated labels.
Christofern was a Donkey’s Tail, or sedum morganianum, part of the succulent family. That term meant absolutely nothing to Eddie unless it was referring to a big bowl of pasta—he had no idea there was a whole plant category called delicious.
“But maybe he wants to be a fern, Steven,” he’d argued. “Ever thought of that? He doesn’t have to be a succulent just because he was assigned so at birth.”
“You’re fucking ridiculous,” had been Steve’s reply.
At first, Eddie had enlisted Steve’s help purely because he’d wanted his attention, and talking about plants was an easy as hell way to get Steve’s attention. Steve was a very passionate plant dad. But later, Eddie grew to love Christofern, and the trials and tribulations of learning how to care for him were almost like raising his own child.
Christofern had not just one but seven long, thickly spiked green tails. Seven tails. He reminded Eddie of a mutated dragon. He was adorable but occasionally grumpy and high-maintenance, like a certain someone Eddie knew. (Perhaps Christofern was more of a prince than a dragon—a dragon prince?)
If he didn’t get enough sunlight, his leaves shed, and he wilted. If he wasn’t rotated daily, he got yellow and sunburnt. And if he didn’t get enough water…
“I swear I watered him... uh, recently.” When had Eddie last watered him? Not the day before, but maybe Wednesday? Or had it been Tuesday? Shit. Eddie pouted. “I just gave him a drink now, anyway. It’s not too late, is it, Doctor Steve?”
He clasped his hands and watched Steve’s attentive eyes rove over his plant, waiting for the diagnosis.
“Eddie, how could you neglect Christofern like this? I should call Plant Protective Services.” Steve grabbed his hand, startling Eddie and his overactive heartbeat.
He took Eddie’s index finger and pushed it into Christofern’s soil right down to his second knuckle. It felt inappropriate. Eddie made a noise, appalled. “Steven, why are you making me violate Christofern?”
Steve ignored him. “What do you feel? The soil is soaked down there, isn’t it?”
Eddie wiggled his finger. It felt goopy. “Yes,” he admitted.
“You’ve overwatered it,” Steve chastised. “Now, the leaves might rot instead of rehydrating themselves. You’ve got to make sure you don’t drown it. Christofern only needs a moderate amount of water every two weeks, okay?”
“Okay,” Eddie said meekly. “I’m sorry, Christofern.”
Steve pulled his finger out of the soil and gave him a look bordering on amusement. “Leave him with me for a few days, and I’ll get him back to where he should be.”
“Thank you, Doctor Steve. How can I ever repay you?” Eddie imagined repaying Steve with his mouth, his tongue, his hands (after he washed the soil off)…
“You can clean the bathroom,” Steve said.
Eddie’s fantasy shattered. He whined. “Does it have to be that?”
“Yup.”
“Damn it, Steve, just make me suck your dick next time,” Eddie grumbled on his way out.
He missed the way Steve’s jaw dropped.
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circusfable · 4 months ago
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A gentle touch for a touch starved baby
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rubyvhs · 4 months ago
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part one : never was offended !
summary : an unknown number texts you out of the blue and you can’t help but be intrigued by the stranger.
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next part
— I’m sorry for the typos, this is the only chapter like this cause I wrote it ages ago & I can’t find it in me to redo it ++ i changed the ages last minute sam’s 30 and reader is 20 something still in uni. as you can see, it’s harder to do this since i can’t just change things last minute and because i wrote the first chapter weeks ago i changed everything to match the plot i came up with.
— tags : @anu-piyakya97 @awnmaneez
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spiderwarden · 5 months ago
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greenleaf4stuff · 4 months ago
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TROP x tumblr text posts
(screenshot via cap-that.com) (my other trop memes)
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backpackingspace · 4 months ago
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Wait going off the idea that Athena keeps things from her favorite people:
What does diomedes give her?
#epic the musical#The odyssey#Greek myths#Athena#Diomedes#On one hand I would love to see diomedes gifts up on the same shelf of odysseus's carvings#But on the other hand diomedes and Athena have a much more traditional mentor relationship#Verse her absolutely batshit insane relationship she has with odysseus and the love she has for the rest of the family#And diomedes prays /interacts with Athena in a much more traditional way too#So I imagine he gives her proper sacrifices instead of yeeting random wood carvings at her#Maybe this is something that happens later in life for diomedes after he's retired and founded a couple cities#He finally has time to 1. Discover what he actually likes to do and 2. For his relationship with Athena to soften into actual friendship#Diomedes (now forty): carefully placing his first actual gift (instead of sacrifice) on Athens alter#Diomedes: goddess Athena i hope this indulgence is okay. I made this for you as a gift for all the time you have spent helping me#Diomedes: now that my fighting is done i hope you will grace me with you presence from time to time. Thank you goddess for everything.#Athena: who didn't realize she was upset that her and Dios relationship never developed into friendship until this second#Athena: clutching the gift to her chest and using quick thought to scream internally#Athena: voice cracking : It's FINE#(Later Athena dragging odysseus from his bed at 3 am screaming at full volume diomedes finally gave me a gift#He's never given you a gift proof that he likes me better than you get fucked#And then disappears before odysseus can retort because she has to spend hours finding the perfect place for her gift)
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fumifooms · 9 months ago
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Holy mother of Chilchuck and Marcille and marchil-
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I don't wanna think about my father dyin' I don't wanna hear my mother cryin' I don't wanna look into the mirror tryin' not to lose my shit Flowin' like lava down the side of a mountain Man in the jungle lookin' for a fountain of youth But he knows that fountain won't appear... fear If it all ends tomorrow I had a blast It looked so beautiful And it hurt so bad What a real good time What a heartfelt world What a fucked up place Searchin' for knowledge Walkin' through fire Man in a garden filled with desire I know my name ain't written in your book... look If it all ends tomorrow I had a blast It looked so beautiful And it hurt so bad What a real good time What a heartfelt world What a fucked up place What a real good time What a heartfelt world What a fucked up place
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It’s literally got everything it’s just marchil at the end my god. Death, fear of death & aging, resignation, cheery "whatever, as long as I had a good time!", looking at the world both with romantic glasses and harsh realistic cynicism.……….. The way the first verse can apply to both of them… I am deceased
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the-cat-and-the-birdie · 2 years ago
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i want Miguel to meet Miles42 so badly.
Miguel: Oh great, there’s another one of you-
Miles42: Ayo, shut the fuck up.
Miguel: What-
Miles42: Yeah, I said it. Shut yo bubble gum dum dum looking ass the fuck up. I don’t give a fuck what you got to say - matter of fact, don’t make me jump my ass up there and punch your dome off rn 🤨 on god
Miguel: lyla what’s wrong with this one
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frozenparadize · 1 month ago
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cilil · 1 year ago
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In a verse where Mairon stays with Aulë and moves to Valinor with the others, he'd totally be that guy who reaches into the furnace with his bare hands to pick stuff up or adjust the fire and says it's a skill issue whenever his incarnate students point out that they can't do that
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spiderman2-99 · 3 months ago
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What’s with all of the… ah, unholy fanarts of me as a priest? Disgustingly inaccurate portrayal of the position aside, I’d make a terrible Father. Don’t have the patience for that even if I did believe in God.
And confession booths are stuffy; sex there would be atrocious.
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rubyvhs · 4 months ago
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part two : lied to my face !
summary : you’re not unaware to the murders in your town, you just hoped it was nothing, until sam tells you otherwise.
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੭୧ @anu-piyakya97 @awnmaneez
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melpomeneprose · 3 months ago
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// i don't have to say it, do i? @avinkusprince
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