#✨ muses update ✨ | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

driverlando · 5 months ago

Text

✧.* SIXTY-NINE

synopsis - y/n is a singer and Lando is the muse for her latest single

before you continue: this is suggestive so minors dni!! if you enjoyed then pls reblog and follow! it means a lot <3

EXCLUSIVE: Pop Sensation Y/N Spotted Leaving Monaco Hideaway Early Morning — Allegedly After Spending Night with F1’s Lando Norris, Says Fan

Monaco – May 10, 2024:

In a shocking twist of events that has sent the rumor mill into overdrive, international pop superstar Y/N was seen slipping out of a discreet building in Monaco early this morning. The singer, known for her chart-topping hits and glamorous lifestyle, was caught by an eager fan who managed to snap a few candid photos, sparking a frenzy of speculation.

Y/N, dressed in an oversized denim jacket over her black dress and carrying an overnight bag, seemed keen on keeping a low profile as she exited the building at around 6 AM. However, her attempt at stealth was thwarted by a die-hard fan who happened to be in the right place at the right time. The fan, who wishes to remain anonymous, shared the encounter with our reporters, providing exclusive photos that reveal the singer’s unmistakable figure.

The buzz doesn’t stop there. Sources close to the scene suggest that Y/N wasn’t alone in the luxurious abode. The same insider hinted at the presence of Formula 1 star Lando Norris, fueling rumors of a budding romance between the two high-profile figures. Lando, who recently competed in and won the Miami Grand Prix, was reportedly seen entering the same building the previous evening.

Speculation has been rife since the two were spotted chatting intimately at an after-party for the Grand Prix. Their undeniable chemistry and shared laughter did not go unnoticed, prompting whispers among attendees. This morning’s sighting has only added fuel to the fire.

Our source disclosed, “Y/N looked like she was trying to keep things under wraps. She was very cautious, but it’s hard to go unnoticed when you’re that famous. The fan got lucky with those photos, and it’s clear that Y/N wasn’t expecting any attention at that hour.”

While Y/N’s management team has yet to comment on the situation, fans have taken to social media to express their excitement and curiosity. “Y/N and Lando? Didn’t see that coming!” tweeted one fan, while another wrote, “They would be the ultimate power couple!”

Lando Norris, known for his charm and talent on the racetrack, has also remained tight-lipped. The British racing driver has previously been linked to a few high-profile personalities, but this is the first time rumors have connected him with the pop icon Y/N.

The Miami Grand Prix weekend has always been a hotspot for celebrity encounters, but this year seems to have outdone itself. With both Y/N and Lando being at the peak of their careers, their possible romance is sure to capture headlines worldwide.

As the day progresses, fans and media alike are eagerly awaiting any statement from Y/N or Lando. Will this be the start of a new celebrity power couple, or just a fleeting moment of intrigue? Only time will tell.

Stay tuned for more updates on this developing story.

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yourusername

liked by landonorris and 13,479,683 others

yourusername back in the studio ✨

view all 6,425 comments

user1 are you going to be singing about a particular muse? 🤨

user2 not lando liking , they’ll be the it couple once they make it official

↳ user3 leave them alone

user4 this best be the juiciest song ever

↳ user5 right?! I need ALL the details 🤭

user6 everyone say it with me now, thank you Lando Norris!

user7 the queen is back in the studio!! can’t wait for new music

—

landonorris

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and 533,689 others

landonorris can you stay up all night?

view all 1,682 comments

user8 the caption 😂 are you referring you your night with y/n?

↳ user9 he must be lol

oscarpiastri for you, i obviously could

↳ landonorris wasn’t talking to you

↳ user10 he definitely meant the caption for @/yourusername

yourusername dripped out💧

↳ user11 SHE COMMENTED!!

—

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 12,562,728 others

yourusername So what you doing tonight?

view all 6,252 comments

user12 for you I’ll clear out my schedule

user13 SHES IN ENGLAND!! IS SHE MEETING LANDOS FAMILY?

↳ user14 yall love reaching

user15 I feel like the caption is a lyric 🤔

landonorris doin’ you right

↳ user16 KSJAJJA NOT LANDO REPLYING TO THE CAPTION

↳ user17 y/n and lando talk to eachother through the captions confirmed

↳ user18 GUYS I FEEL LIKE WERE NOT REACTING ENOUGH TO WHAT HE JUST SAID

—

EXCLUSIVE: Pop Star Y/N Set to Drop Steamy New Single “34+35” Inspired by Night with F1’s Lando Norris

In a sensational twist that’s bound to send fans into a frenzy, international pop icon Y/N is reportedly set to release a brand-new single titled “34+35,” inspired by her recent night with Formula 1 star Lando Norris. This exciting news comes hot on the heels of rumors surrounding their burgeoning romance, which have captivated the media and fans alike.

According to insiders close to the singer, Y/N penned the provocative track following her secret rendezvous with Lando in Monaco. The song, which is said to be both sultry and playful, delves into the intimate details of their night together, promising to leave listeners blushing.

A source from Y/N’s inner circle revealed, “Y/N was absolutely buzzing after her night with Lando. She went straight into creative mode and wrote ‘34+35’ in just a few hours. The chemistry between them has clearly sparked something incredible musically.”

The title “34+35” has already stirred intrigue and speculation, with savvy fans quick to decode its risqué implication – the sum of the numbers, hinting at a rather suggestive theme. This clever play on words is characteristic of Y/N’s bold and unapologetic style, which has earned her legions of dedicated followers.

Y/N took to social media earlier today to tease the upcoming release, sharing a cryptic post that simply read, “34+35 Midnight EST. Yall aren’t ready for this one” alongside a sultry photo of herself. The post has since gone viral, racking up millions of likes and comments as fans eagerly anticipate the drop.

Lando Norris, who has remained coy about his relationship status, added fuel to the fire by retweeting Y/N’s post and leaving a cheeky comment: “Can’t wait to hear this one 😉.” His playful interaction has only intensified the buzz, with many speculating about the depth of their connection.

As the clock ticks down to midnight EST, the anticipation for “34+35” is reaching fever pitch. Fans across the globe are gearing up for what promises to be one of Y/N’s most talked-about releases yet. Given the star power of both Y/N and Lando, the single is expected to top charts and dominate playlists within hours of its release.

This unexpected collaboration between the world of pop music and Formula 1 has everyone talking, and it’s clear that Y/N knows how to keep her audience on their toes. Whether this sizzling track will reveal more about her relationship with Lando or simply offer a tantalizing glimpse into their night together, one thing is certain – “34+35” is set to be the summer’s hottest hit.

Stay tuned for the drop at midnight EST and prepare to be captivated by Y/N’s latest musical masterpiece.

—

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and 4,572,792 others

yourusername 34+35 out now!! Give it a listen, it’s a juicy one 💋

view all 8,628 comments

user19 HELLO THAT WAS THE MOST PUSSY CLENCHING SONG EVER AND ITS ABOUT LANDO?!

↳ user20 it’s not confirmed

↳ user21 an insider from y/ns team confirmed it in a recent article

landonorris Grammy when?

↳ oscarpiastri you don’t deserve to be the muse of a song

↳user22 someone’s jealous

user23 everyone pls thank Mr Lando “doin you right” Norris

↳ user24 they were teasing the song 😭

user25 THE EARTHQUAKE LYRIC, YALL NASTYYY I LIKE IT

↳ user26 and the go till the sunrise lyric 😭 she was hinting at her leaving his place in the morning

—

EXCLUSIVE: Y/N’s New Single “34+35” Drops, Sends Fans into Frenzy – Provocative Lyrics Hint at Night with Lando Norris

June 1, 2024:

The wait is over, and pop sensation Y/N has delivered once again. Her highly anticipated new single “34+35” dropped at midnight EST, and it’s already taking the music world by storm. Fans and critics alike are abuzz with the song’s steamy lyrics, which seem to directly reference her rumored night with Formula 1 star Lando Norris.

The provocative track has left no room for subtlety, with lyrics that paint a vivid picture of their encounter. The lines, “Started at midnight, go till the sunrise,” hint at Y/N’s early morning exit from Lando’s Monaco apartment, an event that was captured by an eagle-eyed fan and ignited widespread speculation.

As the song progresses, Y/N doesn’t hold back. The chorus boldly states, “Can you stay up all night? Fuck me ’til the daylight,” leaving listeners blushing and confirming the nature of her rendezvous with the racing driver. The line “You drink it just like water (water) / You say, ‘It tastes like candy’” adds an extra layer of intimacy, further fueling the scandalous narrative.

Within hours of its release, “34+35” skyrocketed to the top of the charts, with streaming platforms reporting record-breaking numbers. Social media exploded with reactions, as fans dissected every lyric and speculated about the details of Y/N’s night with Lando.

One Twitter user wrote, “Y/N really said NO SECRETS with ‘34+35.’ This song is 🔥🔥🔥,” while another commented, “I can’t believe she actually wrote a song about her night with Lando! #34+35 is a bop.” The hashtag #34+35 quickly trended worldwide, with thousands of tweets and posts flooding in.

Adding to the excitement, Lando Norris himself commented on Y/N’s Instagram post announcing the song with a cheeky “Grammy when?” His playful remark has only intensified the buzz, as fans eagerly anticipate further interactions between the two.

The song’s boldness and raw honesty have been praised by many, with some calling it Y/N’s most daring release to date. Music critic Jenna Martinez noted, “Y/N has never shied away from expressing her truth through music, but ‘34+35’ takes it to a whole new level. It’s a fearless, unapologetic celebration of passion and connection.”

Industry insiders suggest that “34+35” could be a contender for Song of the Summer, with its infectious beat and headline-grabbing lyrics ensuring it stays on heavy rotation. The music video, rumored to be in the works, is expected to drop soon and promises to be just as sensational as the song itself.

Y/N’s daring approach has not only captured the public’s attention but also solidified her status as a pop icon unafraid to push boundaries. With “34+35,” she has delivered a track that is as catchy as it is controversial, proving once again why she is at the top of her game.

As the world continues to buzz about Y/N and Lando’s possible romance, one thing is certain: “34+35” is more than just a song – it’s a cultural moment. Fans will undoubtedly be talking about this release for a long time to come, eagerly watching for the next chapter in this tantalizing story.

—

taglist: @iheartmonaco @orgasming-caterpillar @thearchieves

#f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #formula one x reader #lando norris smau #lando norris fluff #lando norris fanfic #lando norris x reader #lando norris smut #f1 smau #f1 smut

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j0kers-light · 7 months ago

Text

His Lighthouse: Family Ties (LedgerJoker x f!reader)

Family Ties

series summary:

Y/n is an aspiring writer living in Gotham City and struggling to find her next muse. Her recent novel is getting all the buzz, earning her far more attention than she signed up for. But when a chance encounter results in her nursing The Joker back to health, will she find the time to write another best seller or will her own story become front page of the Gotham Gazette?

chapter summary:

After Joker surprises you with a not so happy trip back home, you are stuck stressing over family and the severed ties you left behind in Blüdhaven. Will Joker make do on his word and show you exactly how much he cares, or will this be another disaster in the making?

authors note:

I am never doing back to back chapters ever again do you hear me?! UGH! This was one of the hardest chapters for me to write (to date) I started over twelve times! We're not gonna talk about why it took me a month to write this, just know I am posting this in a new time zone. So it might be late (?) early? Who knows. I hope you enjoy! Chaos will see you in a week! 🖤✨

taglist:

@blackreaderatrisk @twinkledinkle @clemdango04 @l3ejm @tears-of-amber @what-an-angel @darthjokerisyourfather @thatsnoteii @dollster @cheetahspy @kaidennnnn @urdariingdoll @motivation-idontknowher @ins0mniac-whack @spaghettificationandpretzels @reneisance @alittlesmartcookie @ninacutebee16 @carydorse @jaysmentalspace @she-could-never @that--thing @clowning—around @lovesunnyandmary @lostinherownworld3785 @ilovetoomanymen @wolfofluna @apocalypticwafflekitten @heathisbae @lilmaravilla

Let me know if you wish to be added to the official His Lighthouse taglist! Be alerted with any oneshots and the main story updates! 🖤✨

Last Chapter | Next Chapter

The calm before the storm brought forth a sense of trepidation that drove you up the wall.

'I can show you better than I can tell ya Y/n. Watch me.'

Joker's words consumed your every thought. Surely, he would prove his point in some terrifying way, to show that he cared; you just hated waiting.

You kept an eye out for any headlining news and was ever vigilant while out and about for any catastrophic events but... crickets. There was no activity from your dark clown.

At first you were relieved. Joker didn't initiate an all-out war with the Bicchieri's. You rejoiced that nothing bad had gone awry at Vincent's funeral although you secretly wished something had. It was a televised event, even the mayor showed up to pay respects to such a quote, 'respectable family.' They were far from it and the notion that they were made you sick.

Why couldn't a fire break out, or maybe a random gas leak? You hoped for anything to turn the memorial service into a state of pandemonium.

Then you felt guilty. Wishing for violence wasn't progressive for your healing process. You were trying to move on and forget, not to dwell on the past and seek revenge.

Why couldn't Joker understand that?

At the time you thought he did, hence the radio silence; however, that scenario was far from the truth. Joker was in fact making big moves; you were just too blind to see them—to no fault of your own.

Joker kept a great divide between you and his line of work. You knew who he was and saw the aftermath of his horrible deeds. That was about it. Joker censored you from everything else.

He wanted you blissfully unaware of his operations, in fact; he preferred it that way. Joker dropped you off at home expecting your parents to distract you, and they performed well, minus taking you to Vincent's restaurant.

You weren't supposed to see any of that, and Joker wouldn't make the same mistake again. He'd keep a better eye on you from now on.

It was good to be home. You hadn't visited since you officially moved out and Mom and Dad were over the moon with your stay. They showered you with attention and kept the atmosphere at home cozy. They didn't pressure you to stay longer and they most definitely weren't kicking you out. Time seemed to cease in the confines of your childhood home. You quickly regressed back into your old routine, as if you never left. Yet something was missing.

It was almost criminal with how long you've neglected your pride and joy: your hair.

After a trip to the local beauty supply store, you and Ma returned home and got settled in the living room with packs of braiding hair and junk food. The plan was simple and it didn't take long.

You watched tv as your mother braided your hair. Every now and then you would feed her pieces of hair over your shoulder, and she would accidentally tug too hard and jerk your head backwards; however, it was a motion you were used to. Your body simply followed the motion.

In between parting hair and munching on snacks, gossip was shared to pass the time. It was a lively affair; one that you missed dearly. Nothing could ever compare to the feeling of your mother doing your hair. She braided neatly, creating five large cornrows within a matter of hours.

"Ah I miss this, Y/n/n." Mama sighed.

She was tending to the hot kettle as you stared at the tv screen. The afternoon news was on informing the people about current events. You didn't hear Joker being mentioned so you tuned it out. It was literally background noise.

You hugged your knees to your chest when mom ordered you to tilt your head back. The rising steam scalded your neck, but it was vital for the ends of your braids to stay secure. You felt like a kid again waiting for her to finish the task. She locked eyes with you and smiled, "Almost done, sweetheart."

At that moment there was a knock at the door and both of you groaned.

The two of you were closest to the door since your father was upstairs getting ready for a night class.

Imagine your surprise when he announced that he was taking classes at the local uni in pursuit of a medical degree. Mama couldn't be prouder of her husband starting out as a simple janitor at the hospital and working up to a medical student in just a few short years.

"You're never too old to learn, Y/n." He stated.

You were proud of your dad. His life had done a complete one eighty from his days running the streets. Furthering his education was a pipe dream for him back in the day. It showed how just far he'd come. But back to the present.

Whoever was knocking on the front door wasn't letting up.

"I'll get it ma." You sighed while standing up. A shame you were trailing puddles of water on the floor. Not like your unexpected guest would give you time to grab a towel.

The knocks grew in intensity, and you called out to whoever had an attitude. "Bruh chill, I'm right here!" You yanked the door open and froze upon seeing your uncle standing on the stoop.

He took in your wet hair and your shocked expression. "Bella." He smirked. The honorific made you grimace. You were so far removed from the title; you chose not to acknowledge it.

"Uncle." You hurled back the empty title in the same lofty tone he created.

Tensions were high as you stared your kin down with disdain. An unstoppable force met an immovable object. He was not stepping a foot inside your home if you had any say in the matter.

Mama's voice floated from the living room to your ear, "Y/n? Who's at the door?"

Her voice put an end to the staring contest. You didn't want Uncle's bad vibes anywhere near your family. You had every right to speak on the household's behalf.

"No one important." You hollered back to mom.

You were about to close the door when Uncle blocked it with his foot. You glanced down, wishing he'd move. You had no reservations about breaking his foot with the door and he knew that.

But he escalated the situation by leaning into your personal space. You got a whiff of his expensive cologne. The smell hit your nostrils, forcing you to back away and he advanced forward triumphantly. "I happen to disagree, Y/n. I'm here to speak to your dad. Important family business 'n all. Hope you understand."

A wave of confusion danced across your features. What was Uncle D talking about? Dad wasn't with the order anymore, he had no reason to be here, let alone to talk about anything.

Just when you were singing praises for your dad's success, here comes the devil on your doorstep tempting him back into old habits. Dad was doing so good in life to risk it all and indulge your uncle and his mess. You stood your ground with an exaggerated eye roll.

"He's no longer affiliated so take the 'family business' and gone get!"

You hoped your words would make Uncle leave but alas, it seemed to only amuse your relative.

"Such a feisty little thing! I always admired that about you." Uncle laughed. "But it wasn't a suggestion." he growled. You gasped at the sudden change in the air. You had only seconds to react.

Both your parents rushed to the front door when they heard you yelp. They watched you try to close the door, but a strong force made that impossible. At this rate, you and your uncle would break the door if neither of you budged.

Mama gasped whereas your dad saw nothing but red and leapt into action. He nudged you into Mom's concerned arms so he could stare his sibling down.

Sparks flew between the two and the air was heavy with hostility. Dad's eyes were dark with storm clouds brewing. Uncle was simply amused. It was your dad who broke the silence.

"Perhaps you're gettin' forgetful in your old age. I told you to stay away from my family."

Mama shielded you further into the hallway. She knew things could get ugly between the two brothers and she prayed that a fight wouldn't start inside the house. The last time they talked, blood was spilt, and family ties were forever severed. Clearly Mama was reminiscing, judging by her troubled stare.

Uncle D just waved off the threatening words. "I can't. They're my family too [insert dad's name]. Especially Y/n. How old is she by the way? Early twenties are a great age to, let's say, take over the family—"

Your dad quickly cut him off. "Y/n ain't taking over s__t! Why you here?"

Your uncle sighed and glanced over at your mother. She was hesitant to lock eyes with him and even more so when he spoke directly to her. "C'mon [insert mother's name]. It's rude to leave a guest standing outside, no? Whatever happened to the Y/L/N's famous manners?"

You knew the veiled insult would rile mom up and she didn't disappoint with her clap back. "Manners, in a way, are akin to respect. It's earned, not given." She squeezed you tighter.

Uncle D finally caught on that your parents weren't with his foolery. He shook his head before coming clean.

"Like I said, I'm here on family business. Some big wigs are meddling in our operations. We're holding it down for now, but we'd fare better if we had two heads instead of one tackling the prob, ya know what I'm sayin?"

Your dad tensed up, "I ain't affiliated no more. Not my problem." He was about to slam the door in your uncle's face when the next words spoken shocked everyone.

"The Joker took Jr."

You and your mother's eyes widened. She was shocked that your cousin, (who was notorious for evading friend or foe) was captured.

You were short of passing out. Joker did what?

You didn't hear anything else after Mom and Dad ushered Uncle D inside. You made a mental reminder to sage the place once he left.

It was bizarre how dad's previous animosity with his brother dissipated after hearing the circumstances. Family was family after all so this could be an exception to their truce. The three of them sat in the living room to discuss things in detail, however you were still standing in the doorway, in the first stages of denial.

This was the major headline you were waiting for. Joker had gone insan(er) if your uncle's claim turned out to be true.

You never considered Joker targeting your own family. He must've been mistaken. Granted you and Darien Jr. shared the same unique last name, the world was a big place. Joker couldn't have known Jr. was your cousin. This had to be a mistake or at least a reason why he took him.

You headed towards the living room couch in a daze. Hopefully you could gain some insight before you blew things out of proportion.

You sat down across from your uncle. Your mother hardly looked your way as she poured the two brothers something to drink. Even in tense situations, (and amongst unwelcome company) she remained poised and hospitable.

Your uncle venomously disagreed with whatever was said prior to your arrival.

His authoritative voice echoed loudly in the living room. "No, this could be a warning. We should beef up security around Bella. Right now, she's next in line of succession."

That annoying title again. It was one that you never wanted. Why was dad entertaining this garbage in the first place? He hated the Order as much as you did.

Thankfully your mother spoke out against all of this. "My daughter is not getting involved with your.. your gang!" She cried.

Uncle D swatted the misunderstanding away like a gnat.

"It's not a gang. It's our family's ancient syndicate passed down from generations. Our blood right." Corrections made, he continued. "Anyways.. does she have any security measures? The Joker could come after her next."

Joker coming after you? Now that was rich. The mere thought made you laugh out loud and it caused everyone in the room to stare at you.

What were you thinking letting your emotions get the better of you? Now you were on the spot with no excuses for your blunder. You prepared yourself for Dad's scolding.

"This isn't funny, Y/n. The Joker is a psychopath. He's unpredictable with no regard for human life. If he catches you." Dad just shook his head. He didn't want to think about it.

Meanwhile, you were thinking about Joker hunting you down. It made for a fun roleplay scene. You hoped no one saw the tips of your ears turning red from your lustful thoughts. Mama eyed you sided ways when you bit your lip, smirking.

"No, she doesn't have any current protection but that changes tonight. I'll call a few old buddies and get something arranged."

Current protection? What was that supposed to mean? This was becoming too much for you to process.

You raised your hand for the adults in the room to notice. "Um, excuse me? Do I have a say in this? Mind you, I'm just visiting; I can just head on back to Gotham and—"

Uncle D immediately shot down that idea. "We can't protect you that far! You will stay here until this clown mess is handled."

He turned to resume brainstorming with your father, but you had plenty more to say. You and Uncle D were already on bad terms, but the way he talked down to you just now, made things worse.

You were talking back before you even realized it. "Whose daddy you think you is? I can go wherever I want, while you handle this 'clown mess."

Funny how he complimented your feisty attitude at the door but now it was a problem. It was evident he was losing patience given his eye roll and soft sigh.

"Brother, please, talk some sense into this girl. She's completely ignorant to the bounty on her head."

"What bounty?" Your mother interjected. She had finally emerged from the kitchen with proper snacks for everyone to munch on. The junk food the two of you bought was long forgotten.

She glanced around the room, hearing the danger her baby was subjected to. It was the first time your dad heard about this too, and he sat up straighter in his seat.

Uncle D knew this new information would sway your parents into helping so he painted a vivid picture of your dire straits back in Gotham.

"Your little author here acquired a bounty from Two Face and now that The Joker kidnapped Jr., I don't doubt for a second that he placed one on her head too." He snagged a cookie from the serving tray your mom brought and waited for the fallout.

The first wave of concern came from your mother. "Honey is this true?" She asked. You couldn't lie to her, especially when she looked a second away from having a fainting spell.

You cast an evil glare at your uncle. This was all his fault. You didn't want your parents to know how dangerous your living situation was back in Gotham City. There was no way to downplay the situation now that Uncle D aired out your dirty laundry.

You chose honesty as your primary defense. "Um.. my charity event got shot up by Two Face and his goons a while back. He's just confused about one of my fictional characters, whom he thinks deserves real life justice. It's no big deal." You winced when Dad facepalmed himself.

How could his baby be so naïve?

"It is a big deal. Two Face wanted you dead until he suffered a big loss in some warehouse accident. His gang is all but dissolved now and doesn't pose a threat. Our worry is The Joker." Uncle D stated. While he had the room's attention, he launched into a story.

"When your relationship with that Biccherri boy went south, so did our alliance with them. We lost our stronghold here in Blüdhaven. The Joker's been steppin' on our turf ever since."

You grit your teeth as he spoke so causally about that disgusting family. You had a longstanding grudge against your uncle for what he did, not like he seemed to care.

"Don't you see, Bella? The Joker wants to eliminate his street competition. These past few days, he's been tearing Blüdhaven apart like he's searching for something, or rather someone. Piece by piece he'll tear Mors Atra Lux apart to find it. First by killing Jr., then you, and lastly me. I just want you safe." Your uncle chided.

By the end of his monologue, your blood was boiling, and you could care less about his concern. It was all fake anyways.

You learned from the past. Everything your uncle did had an ulterior motive and you had enough of his cunning ploys. You had to smile to keep from bursting into tears.

"My memory is a bit foggy, but I thought we were expelled from the syndicate. How does any of this pertain to us again?" You asked the room.

"You are not expelled Bella, if anything we need you now more than ever!" Uncle Darien plead.

You slowly blinked in shock. The audacity of this man. The gall, the gumption. Your Haven accent made a rare appearance and set the tone. "Nah, you got me messed up if you think I'm finna help you."

Your mother reached for your arm, but you jerked it away. She gasped at your unexpected behavior. "Y/n! Your cousin's life is at stake!" She scolded.

"And? Was Jr. there for me when I needed him? No! In fact.. you forget that monster I'm forced to call Uncle practically arranged me and Ty together! Some uncle his is! But oh, he just wants me safe. Liar."

You wanted to slap the smirk right off Uncle D's face, but you weren't that petty. Not yet at least. You chose instead to sit quietly in anger lest your actions got the better of you.

Mom bowed her head, looking close to tears. "Y/n I.... I didn't know."

She sounded genuine but you knew dad had a small hand in the arrangement. He was still active within the Order at the time and promoting the doomed relationship was his greatest mistake.

The guilt was written all over his face.

He bowed his head as well. "Y/n, I will never forgive myself for the pain I put you through. I hope I've redeemed myself as a father." He sighed before looking you dead in the eye. "But I need to help another father redeem himself. Darien needs our help to save Jr."

The living room was quiet; no one dared to speak. Even your uncle chose not to comment during the intense father daughter staring contest.

You knew where your dad was coming from, (really you did) but it still hurt to see him side with his brother, the snake that he is. You forgave dad seventy times seven, but you would never forgive your uncle.

You nodded and mumbled something under your breath.

"What was that dear?" Your mom asked.

You ignored everyone calling your name in favor of storming upstairs to your room. If you had stayed any longer, they would've seen you crumble from the weight of your emotions.

Your palms were sweaty and you adopted a bad case of tunnel vision. That could only mean one thing, a panic attack. You wanted nothing more than to scream into the void of your room back in Gotham; however, it was miles away.

And since you had no proper sanctuary to hide in, you had to settle for the next best thing.

Halfway across town and hidden in an abandoned warehouse, Joker was busy conducting business.

Frost had driven down from Gotham City to help his boss with the ongoing manhunt. This had been their biggest lead so far, so all hands were on deck to make it count.

The pair was standing in a room where a lone male was tied to a chair. Usually their hostages were too terrified to speak; this guy had plenty to say.

"F__k you, f__k him, and those lame shoes you sportin'. Both of y'all bugging on God. You caught me lacking and that's on me, but whatchu tryna get into my guy? I bet you ain't een about that life for real."

Joker nodded along as if he understood a single word the man said. It didn't help that his Blüdhaven accent was stronger than any superhero in the area. It made comprehension near impossible.

"RiiiiiiiighT. So! Darien—"

They guy had the audacity to cut Joker off. "Aht, it's Jr. Come correct."

The interruption made Joker swallow his ire before continuing. "Okay, jun~iorrrrrr. Here's the thing. I'm looking for someone annnd a little birdie told me that you might know where he isss."

"Cap."

Joker tilted his head and glanced at Frost for help.

The six-foot three man hardly looked up from his crossword puzzle, "It means you're lying." He had his daughter Gen to thank for being on top of current slang.

"I don't need a translator." J muttered under his breath. He secretly did, but that was beside the point. He turned his focus back on Jr. who rolled his eyes, all with a cocky smile.

He clearly had more to say. "F__k all dat bruh. You getting bent outta shape ova' a man ion even know."

"Hmm. I think that's err.. cap.. since I have pictures that prove other~wise." Joker held up a few photos in front of Jr. "See. That's you! And.... him." Joker growled.

He began tapping the photo until he poked a hole right through the face. Frost pointedly cleared his throat. It was enough to get Joker back on track.

Jr. snorted, completely unfazed. "Nah Blüd, that ain't me."

Joker cracked his neck with a sigh. Frost understood the signal and set aside his word puzzle. Finally! Things were about to get interesting.

"I'm ah, sorry, to hear that uh... Jr. because I—"

Joker's sentence was drowned out by the sound of his phone ringing.

He was still getting used to the new device you purchased for him, and he forgot to turn it on silent. Joker had at least changed the default ringtone to a theme song from your favorite tv show to distinguish that it was you calling.

The joyful tune cut through the tense air somehow getting louder. Jr. found the distraction hilarious. "D__n man, you got baby mama drama too?" He laughed when Joker's jaw clenched in irritation.

The ringing stopped for a moment until it started up again. "You gone answer that?" Jr. asked.

Joker didn't want to, but you were calling back to back.

It meant something was wrong and his Light took priority over work. He'd deal with his annoying hostage after checking on you. J sighed before fishing his phone out of his pocket.

He snapped his fingers, signaling Frost to take over before striding over to the door for some privacy. The second that J answered the phone, he heard you crying, and he was on instant alert.

"What's wrong, my Light?"

You sniffed hearing his voice. It provided little comfort, but it wasn't enough when you were this deep, swimming in anxiety.

It had been four days since he drove you down here to Blüdhaven. What was supposed to be a 'night you'd never forget', turned out to be one giant headache.

You were over and done with the nostalgia of your hometown and wanted some peace and quiet. "J... I-I want to go home."

You knew you caught Joker at a bad time judging by his heavy sigh. He didn't reply for a while and you began biting your lip.

"Stop that."

His response made you jump. "W-What? I'm not doing anything." You looked around your room, thinking Joker was secretly spying on you. You wouldn't put it past him if he was.

And like a weighted blanket, Joker's voice enveloped you.

"I know you. You bite your lip when you're uhh, stressed. That poor.. poor lip only I should be biting." You could practically hear his smirk over the phone. It caused one to bloom across your face.

"I'm a liT-tle busy right now, doll but when I'm done, I'll come get ya." He assured you.

You knew he would, but you still snorted lightly. "Too busy torturing my cousin to come see bout me?"

And now it was Joker's turn to question if you were spying on him. He tensed up and stole a glance at Jr. The idiot was trying to spark a conversation with Frost. Key word: try.

Was his intel team slacking that bad to not do an extensive background check before kidnapping people? Joker didn't see any family resemblance although that meant nothing when he had your word to go by.

"Repeat that, Bunny?" J asked. Maybe he heard you wrong. Perhaps the phone signal was bad in the warehouse, yet he heard you loud and clear.

"My Uncle came over claiming you took my cousin. Judging by your tone, I-I guess you did." It became quiet on your end and Joker inwardly cringed.

Good thing he didn't start torturing the poor sap yet.

If he had...he would've been in deeper trouble. How could he screw up this badly? You would hate him forever by hurting your family yet what you said next puzzled him.

"I... I don't care what you do to him, I-I just wanna go home, J."

Joker had to clarify that he was hearing this right. Something must've muddled with your ability to think properly. "Uh.. doll? Are ya sure you don't care?"

He knew you did, (his Bunny cared about everything and everyone with that bleeding heart of yours) but he focused on the bigger picture. Something had stressed you out to the point of a social burnout. No one stressed his Bunny out but him.

Joker remembered that you suffered social fatigue and the last burnout happened when you went to Atlanta with your friends. It seemed like you didn't do well with random bouts of travel.

His Light was mentally drained, and this time, it was all his fault.

He forced you to face your fears and travel back home. His overall plan to cheer you up had severely backfired and learning about your hometown had dug up more problems than it did in solving them.

Joker glanced across the room and locked eyes with your cousin. Speaking of problems...

Darien Jr. was already staring at the dark clown with a cocky smirk. This interrogation wasn't going nowhere. It was best to rule this as a technical loss and focus time and energy on you.

His curiosity would have to wait. You needed Joker now more than ever.

Joker swore under his breath before returning to your active phone call. "Uhh, doll. Do ya trust me?"

Hours had passed and your uncle had yet to leave and as a result, Dad missed his night class. Hopefully that wouldn't come back to bite him during finals.

You spent the remainder of your night brooding in your room, and against Joker's better judgement, biting your lip raw.

Your hour long phone call with J was rather... interesting.

He tried to lighten your mood by cracking morbid jokes as you packed what little things you accumulated during your stay at home. Everything fit into your old high school book bag that you found in your closet.

You weren't too keen on Joker's fascination with death but hearing his voice in your ear served its purpose. Slowly but surely, your tears dried and your dark clouds passed. For now.

With clearer skies ahead, it brought some clarity to the current situation.

Perhaps you had overreacted downstairs, but you weren't going to apologize to your uncle. If all went according to plan, you'd be on your way back to Gotham City and far away from the 'family business.'

You had enough problems in Gotham to worry about and it was time to head back and face them.

Joker kindly reminded you that everything you found back at your old apartment had already been dropped off at your penthouse in Gotham. Joker was amazing, always thinking twelve steps ahead of you and he proved his usefulness with his latest plan. He went on and on, ironing out the details into your ear as you packed. It was the first time you got to experience Joker's mind at work.

He was a mad genius. A brutal, tactical genius.

This plan of his would ensure everyone involved got what they wanted. Granted, it was a dangerous idea and could potentially expose Joker's relations with you if things went south. He was prepared for the fallout should he fail. He had every ounce of confidence that he wouldn't.

You and your happiness was always worth the risk in Joker's eyes. He assured you there was nothing for you to worry about.

Per his instructions, you snuck downstairs and placed your belongings inside the SUV's trunk; then it was time to set the stage. Your loud scream swiftly gained your dad and uncle's attention.

They found you on the stoop outside pointing at a letter lying on the stairs. "I came outside to get some air and saw that!"

They had little time to scold you about venturing outside alone, your uncle was more attentive to the mysterious letter. It was hastily written but the message was clear.

"They're letting Jr. go? That doesn't make any sense! How can we be sure this isn't a trap?" Your uncle wondered aloud.

He glared at the attached joker playing card before tossing it aside. You discreetly picked it up for safe keeping.

Your dad couldn't see over Darien's shoulder. He snatched the note away to read it more carefully. There had to be a loophole somewhere, however the letter itself was so vague.

You wondered if you scared your mother screaming the way you did but she had long since gone to bed, no longer wanting any part in any illegal activities. She suggested you stay out of quote, 'your dad's crazy family affairs', but you were already in too deep.

Ironically, you were about to single-handedly take care of this entire mess without their knowledge. You only hoped the two brothers would follow along according to plan.

Your uncle spoke up first.

"I don't care. If this is a chance to get Jr. back alive, then I'm taking it." Uncle D said. You glanced at your father when he finished reading the letter.

"What is it bro?" The question was aimed at your father, but he answered it while staring you dead in the eye. "Something ain't right. Why hand Jr. over after holding him for so long?"

You didn't like the pensive look in your father's eyes. It spelled nothing but trouble.

The three of you migrated back inside to the couch, where all of this began. You were nearly bouncing in your seat; praying they would stick to the script Joker drilled into your brain. The entire plan would fall apart if you weren't in attendance tonight.

"We should head out. The meetup spot is a bit ways off."

It didn't matter who said it, it was your cue to insert yourself back into the conversation. They hadn't said a thing about you tagging along and you began to panic. "Wait... aren't you taking me with you?" you blurted out.

The two brothers looked at you with unreadable expressions.

"Absolutely not! This is grown folks business." Your dad ordered.

You should've expected that response from your dad. Fortunately, he wasn't the one in charge here.

You turned towards your uncle, praying he would adhere to the letter's instructions. "Your father is right. It's too dangerous Bella." He nodded along with your father's decision.

This isn't what Joker planned, not at all, and your look of shock was genuine. Your brain couldn't even form a counterargument.

"W-What? But I... I have to! I m-mean, I can—!" Tears blurred your vision as you struggled to spit out a coherent sentence.

Now was not the time for your anxiety to get the better of you! You had an inner war with yourself, blissfully unaware of the silent conversation Uncle Darien had with his brother.

Your e/c eyes sparkled, somewhat hopeful when dad turned to address you. Maybe he had changed his mind. "No, Y/n and that's final." Your dad said.

Dad escorted you to your room while your uncle called a team who would be running temporary surveillance on the townhouse. Did they really fear Joker that much? You tried not to think of the horrors that Joker inflicted to instill this much fear into seasoned men.

You had nothing to fear when it came to Joker.

You and dad arrived at your bedroom door. "Please don't be angry with me, Y/n/n. I'm doing this to protect you." He reached out to cup your cheek but flinched when you slammed the door in his face instead.

The last thing you need in your fragile state was physical contact. And speaking of states of mind, the wall of pictures in your bedroom did little to quell it.

They were memories of a Y/n that would never be the same. Your mind was desperately trying to move on but your past was making that virtually impossible.

Joker was expecting you to be at the exchange tonight. He was a man of his word and promised to take you back home, but your father crushed that hope.

You fought back tears as you sat on your bed. What were you going to do now? It was too risky for Joker to pick you up here with the 'protection' Uncle D was arranging.

It would be impossible to sneak away once they arrived.

The wind was howling outside, and it rattled an annoying tree branch that always hit your window growing up. You begged dad to cut it—he never got around to it. The ancient tree tapped once more on your pane, almost in an inviting manner.

The wheels in your head began to turn with ideas.

Well past midnight when the house had gone still, two shadows snuck out the back door.

They nodded at the two gentlemen who would be keeping watch of the house and its small perimeter before headed towards the street.

Like its much larger sister city, Blüdhaven was a city that never slept. Distant sounds of sirens, the metro passing through the boroughs, and the occasional sound of tires screeching, set the scene for the night. It was abuzz with activity.

Uncle D was heading towards his parked car but was stopped by his brother slapping his arm.

"Nah. Let's take Y/n's wheels. Trust me, they won't expect us pulling up in that." He pointed to an SUV parked on the curb.

And your dad was right. The all-black vehicle blended perfectly with Blüdhaven's nighttime scene. He also smirked, knowing the wheels would make his brother jealous.

Uncle Darien whistled lowly, seeing the vehicle up close. It was sleek and obviously imported. He admired yours, (or was it Joker's) ride. "I gotta get me one of these." Your uncle stated.

"Yeah, good luck with that. I dunno how Y/n managed to afford it" Your dad unlocked the SUV and the two of them hopped inside.

Uncle D ooh and ahhed at the custom interior. "Oh yeah? How much you think this runs Bella? Think she'll sell?"

Your dad turned to face his sibling, "Why don't you respect Y/n's wishes first? She doesn't want anything to do with the syndicate so use her given name. Got it?"

Uncle D eyed his brother in awe. [Insert dad's name] spoke up for once.

Darien would never give up his crusade in you taking over. His son was a terrible heir. The belladonna, however, was the head and center of the Syndicate. Beautiful yet deadly, like the plant the order aptly derived from; you were the perfect fit to succeed him, but for now—he would abide by your 'wishes'.

He chuckled under his breath. "Got it."

Nothing else was said on the way to the rendezvous spot.

The SUV rolled to a stop in the empty warehouse lot. Tall, dark buildings with boarded up windows and doors surrounded the empty lot, giving it an eerie, closed off feeling from the busier street. Along with the fact it was past midnight, the whole encounter left an uneasy feeling in the air, but everyone involved wasn't afraid of a little darkness.

Blüdhaven was out of Batman's jurisdiction to pose as a threat and his sidekick, Nightwing had too much on his plate to be of any concern tonight.

Joker knew what he was doing selecting this area. He always considered the tiniest details and factored them into the final equation. He enjoyed a well-executed plan every now and then—and he did not want any witnesses tonight.

Your father parked the SUV and he and brother unbuckled their seat belts simultaneously. "We're the first ones here." Your dad grumbled.

"Teh, you think a freak like The Joker would be prompt? Just wait little brother, they'll come."

"Don't call me that." Your dad bit out. His older brother didn't pay the comment any mind.

Darien nodded towards the main entrance. "Here they go."

Another car rolled into the gravel parking lot kicking rocks and debris in the already foggy night, thirty minutes past the expected meeting time. The car came to a stop a few yards from your parked SUV and turned off its engine.

The headlights stayed on as the driver and passenger doors opened.

The newcomers (two men dressed in all black) walked to the back door and much to your uncle's relief, dragged his son out. Jr. had a sack over his head and his hands were bound behind him, but other than that, he seemed okay.

He was held captive by The Joker for almost four days. They were happy to see him alive.

Your dad checked his weapon one last time before taking a calming breath. "Let's go." He and Darien stepped out of the car to begin the negotiations.

You waited several minutes before poking your head up from out of the trunk area.

Neither your father nor uncle noticed that you were hiding back there. And they called themselves mercenaries. You rolled your eyes up to the panoramic sunroof.

The decision to climb out your bedroom window and hide in the SUV was a split decision that paid off well. Thank goodness Joker had a mind to tell you to hide your bag in here and a huge shoutout for your father in deciding to take your vehicle in the first place.

Everything simply worked out in your favor.

Well almost. You almost broke your leg climbing (falling) out of the backyard oak tree. It had been years since you performed the task, and your muscles protested the foreign experience.

It was mind boggling how out of shape you were during most tasks and a flexible goddess whenever you and Joker had sex.

God, you missed J... when was the last time you and him had some quality time together? Just thinking about Joker's skills in bed made your heart flutter.

Ah! Now was not the time to be distracted!

You made it to the meeting in one piece. All you had to do now was wait for Joker to show up.

The wagon's windows were tinted but you remained in your hiding spot just to be on the safe side. Joker didn't specify what would happen during this portion of the plan. You were blindly trusting J at this point. Not the best feeling in the world.

You failed to notice him amongst the group of men standing outside and found that odd since he stressed for you to be in attendance tonight.

If he wasn't here, then what was the point? The meeting itself appeared to be going well until you saw your uncle reach for his gun.

You gasped as everyone in attendance drew their weapons. Okay... now you were worried for an entirely different reason.

Your heart was racing as voices and tensions rose.

You could hear your uncle demanding Joker's goons to let his son go, as if they were listening. It was too dark to see, but you knew a shootout was imminent. You feared the worst until suddenly the door to the parked car ahead of yours swung open.

You weren't the only one caught off guard.

Everyone's attention turned towards the movement and for good reason. A head of green hair was seen poking out before standing up straight. You sighed in relief at the familiar hue.

Joker and his grand entrances. He was here after all.

However that relief was short-lived. The same dread that seized your senses back at Vincent's restaurant took hold of you tonight.

Joker in his element was truly a force to fear. All eyes were on him as he boldly sauntered into the fray. Joker ignored the guns trained on him and tossed a friendly arm over Darien Jr.'s shoulder. Your cousin didn't appreciate the contact.

"Good evening gentle~mennn. What seems to be the errr, problem?"

Hearing Joker's dark ominous voice made you duck down out of sight. It wasn't the flirty, reassuring tone that J used as he spoke to you over the phone.

The man who poked your cousin's cheek with a knife and laughed at your uncle's horrified face could not be the same lover whom you missed these past few days. Or was it?

There were so many sides to Joker and prior to this trip back home, you had turned a blind eye to his more violent persona. Granted it had always been there, he rarely allowed you to see it. Just because Joker shielded you from his line of work, it didn't change the fact he was still the nation's deadliest criminal.

The late night phone call the two of you had after he wreaked havoc in Vincent's restaurant was still fresh on your mind. Getting visual reminders of Joker's darker side was apparently still jarring. Seeing him as The Joker was a hard pill to swallow.

No one dared to move or speak and that seemed to irritate Joker.

He smacked his lips while glaring at the gathered crowd. He was quick to note that you weren't present.

Joker had to mask his concern as irritation. He crossed his fingers that you were patiently waiting inside the SUV. So what if there was a slight hiccup in his plan? He could work around this.

"That's strange. I thoughT we had a deaaaaaal. You get err, junior back... you give me intel." Joker scratched his head with the knife handle.

He made eye contact with your father who curled his lip back in disgust. "You uh read my letter, right?" Joker asked.

Your uncle spoke on his sibling's behalf. "It didn't say s__t about intel."

You were Joker's intel. He blinked a few times to avoid getting violent. It was official, you weren't here.

Joker played off his anger by punching one of his goons. "Hey. Did ya send the right note?"

They winced before whispering, "T-There was more than one?"

Back in the SUV, you wanted to facepalm yourself. What happened to the foolproof plan Joker bragged about over the phone? Nothing was not going as rehearsed!

No surprise, you weren't the only one getting frustrated by the whole ordeal. "I'm tired of playing games. Hand me my son now!" Your uncle shouted.

Joker made an uneasy noise. "Mm, I assure you, this is noT a game. How about we ahhh.. meet again, when you have what I want." Joker snapped his fingers, and his men were hauling Jr. back to the car.

"Ayyy yo! This some bull—" Jr. was cut off mid sentence and tossed back inside the car at the same time your dad and uncle sprang into action.

It all happened so fast; there was no time to react. You saw Joker pull out a gun and aim it at your family members. Shots rang out and you covered your mouth in horror. They both slumped to the ground, and Joker eyed them impassively.

He waved at the car holding your cousin to leave; and they peeled out the lot on two wheels. Only then, all was quiet.

Your heart was in your throat as you slid back into your hiding spot. A river of tears blurred the world around you. You struggled to process what you just saw. Joker didn't. He couldn't have.

The minutes ticked by in your state of shock. The gunshots still echoed in your head, five in total. He did. He really did. This couldn't be real!

The door of the SUV opened, and you heard someone calmly get inside and turn the vehicle on. You knew who it was, and my how your excitement to see Joker quickly morphed into fear.

It took seconds for his poker face to crumble.

His loud string of expletives made you flinch, especially when it sounded like he hit something inside the car. It clanged to the ground, most likely in pieces.

You were too scared to move when you heard Joker call out your name. There was no way he knew you were hiding in the trunk. You remained still, too afraid to move a muscle and give up your location.

Joker repeated himself over and over like a broken record in the quiet vehicle. Apparently your name acted as a sedative for him. Joker took deep calming breaths in between pronouncing the syllables of your name.

All the while, he mentally went over his original plan.

Joker planned for your uncle to receive the correct note where it clearly stated to bring you or else. Of course, they would, but instruct you to stay inside the SUV and not to make a sound. He would then trade your cousin for your shiny imported vehicle, knowing good and well you were inside.

Unfortunately, his goons were absolute idiots and sent the wrong negotiation letter. How, that didn't matter. If they hadn't screwed up, Joker would be driving you back to Gotham by now. Now he was alone without his Light. Again.

Hence why he was going awol in the driver's seat.

Joker would have to try and sneak you out of your family townhouse, which was another mission he would have to orchestrate on the fly.

He didn't trust anyone else to help since it was clear that his henchmen were idiots and could screw up something so simple as delivering a letter.

Separation anxiety was rearing its ugly head and being away from you was affecting Joker's decision-making skills. Add in the fact he hadn't slept well in these past days apart and boom.

Joker wasn't at his one hundred percent. He was looking forward to seeing you tonight to revert back to factory settings of sorts.

Never in his life did Joker imagine that he would miss someone. He was a loner—always have, always would be, until you came along. You introduced him to human interaction and got him addicted to you. You made Joker.... dare he say, normal.

Well as normal as slipping into a psychotic episode could be.

It was triggered all because he craved your presence. You truly were his strength and his greatest weakness.

There was no shame admitting that he was weak for you, but he had to know you were okay to feel whole again.

You weren't where he needed you to be, and that terrified him.

The dark confines of his mind were closing all around him and only you could drag him back into your blinding light and make everything okay. The voices in his head (which were normally only pro-violence) agreed that finding you took top priority. He could rage later.

Joker needed you and he'd burn Blüdhaven down to reach your side.

Somehow, he shifted gears and got the SUV out onto the street despite his troubled mind making his movements choppy. Under normal circumstances; he sucked at advanced technology but today, J navigated the car's display system like a pro.

"C'mon baby. Pick up. Pick uP. Pick. Up." Joker's mumbled while gripping the leather steering wheel.

You were still shell shocked, unable to process that Joker was calling you. And when your phone started to ring from the trunk, J slammed on the brakes. Your body collided with the side panel, and thus your cover was blown.

The pain snapped you out of your stupor and you were able to hear the driver's door slamming shut, along with heavy footsteps approaching the rear hatch.

You couldn't crawl over the second row of seats fast enough. The back door was yanked open and Joker was startled to see that you were trying to escape. He reached in to stop you and like a switch, your survival instincts kicked in.

The wool was yanked from over your eyes, and you saw Joker for what he really was. He didn't understand why you were fighting him.

"Let me go you murderer!" You screamed when Joker wrested you upright. His brief look of guilt encouraged you to fight harder.

A nearby streetlamp bathed Joker in a pool of light, and the harsh shadows from his scars made him look like the monster all of Gotham City declared him to be.

In under normal circumstances you saw Joker in a more positive light. There was goodness within him if someone had the time to gently coax it out, but tonight; you couldn't be bothered to try.

Right now, you were kicking and screaming while fighting back tears. You didn't want to believe what just happened was real.

He noticed your distress and backed off to give you some space. It was instinctual to check on your wellbeing. "Uh what's wrong?"

His level of nonchalance sent you into hysterics.

"How could you?!! Y-You.. you shot my dad! That's what's wrong! You don't think, you.. you promised!" The rest of your sentence was reduced to mere hiccups.

Joker rolled his eyes. That's what you were bent out of shape about? He thought you found out about something else he'd done.

Your family was fine, probably irritated and in pain, but relatively fine.

He bent down and gently guided your head to rest on his chest. You hated how quickly your body sagged into the offered comfort. Joker's natural scent of lighter fluid and spices seeped into your brain, causing it to temporarily shut down.

Despite wanting J far far away, your nails dug into his suit jacket to keep him close.

Joker didn't mind the tight grip. You were a tiny thing in the circle of his arms, (and he missed you terribly) even if you were ruining the moment with your misguided emotions. As you calmed down a bit, he used the time to take in every detail about you since he saw you last.

You were still his Goddess, tears and all, and during these days apart, you found the time to braid your hair all pretty. He missed you way too much and you felt that in his content sigh.

Time seemed to slow as Joker held you. Hugs from Joker were so rare and divine— reality seemed to fade away, but then you remembered why you were upset in the first place.

Joker and his web of evil deeds. He was too calm after gunning down your family members. He arched an eyebrow when you pushed him away.

The stretch of road he pulled off to the side of was empty and it looked like a no man's land. You were a Blüdhaven native, and still, you had no idea where you were.

Joker was by far the scariest thing out here yet it still gave you the creeps. A thick lining of trees bordered the one lane road to your far right and you eyed it intently. If you got a head start...

"Don't. Do. It." Joker warned you. He blocked your exit and sent daggers dipped in jade your way.

You hated yourself for falling under their spell. You were still inside the trunk with no traction whatsoever and Joker knew that. He would pluck you from the air before you hurt yourself trying to run.

You hated how he was so attuned to your safety even at a time like this. You were supposed to be mad at him, not swooning like a schoolgirl.

You refused to fold so easily.

You stood your ground and matched his stare with one of your own. It made Joker falter a bit. Seeing his bunny all steadfast like this was kinda hot but he needed to get his head out the gutter and address the situation properly.

Honesty was a better policy than trying to manipulate you.

"Yeah I shot your erm.. father. Y/n wait!" Joker shouted when you tried jumping out the SUV.

He was faster and restrained your body with ease. "SweethearT. Listen. To. Me." He held you down; mindful that you hated being cornered.

You didn't know it, but at any time you could've overpowered him. He didn't want to trigger your PTSD and make things worse. He eased up a bit and begged for you to understand. "They're fine, Y/n."

Joker knew you didn't believe him for a minute. J using nonlethal weapons? Yeah right. It sounded way too convenient.

He had to lay this on thick. "Y/n please. I did, I used rubber bullets. Frost will make sure they err.. get home safe. Ya gotta... well uh. You don't have to really.."

Joker leaned over you, blocking out all light in the area. Endless pools of green were all you could see, and pure desperation was swimming in its depths.

You always thought it strange how Joker's eyes had an unnatural glow to them. Tonight, they were almost hypnotic, sucking you in.

"You don't have to trust me, Y/n. I get it if ya don't." Joker patiently waited as the gears turned in your head.

He could see the uncertainty crossing your features as your e/c eyes darted from left to right. You had every right not to trust him and he would have to accept that reality if you didn't.

And that looked like a possibility.

You were a wary creature after your assault and because of it, trust was a big factor to you. Joker worked so hard to earn it and get to where he was today. You allowed him into your home, your bed, and one day, he wished to conquer your heart.

That looked like a hopeless dream now. You were a cornered animal, struggling to make sense of Joker's careless actions. He knew he screwed up big time and there wasn't much he could do to make it right.

He could only hope that you looked deep within your heart to forgive him. If not, then this could be it. He could lose you right here, right now, and that made him a desperate man.

Joker would never be the same no matter the outcome.

You didn't speak for a while as you let his words sink in. When Joker saw you slowly shake your head, all logic flew out the window. He couldn't lose you. He couldn't.

He dug into his coat pocket and fished out a gun. You flinched away from the sight of it.

"Shoot me." Joker said.

You were speechless and not the good kind. He wanted you to do what?! Joker was clinically insane, but this was sheer madness! You spoke your thoughts aloud. "H-Have you lost your mind?"

Not a second after Joker chuckled, "Yes." He smirked at your lackluster glare. "I can prove it's rubber. Here." He wrested the gun into your hands which were shaking like a leaf.

You knew how to handle one (your dad unfortunately drilled that info into your brain at an early age), but you still hated the feeling of cold steel in your hands. It was like greeting an old friend after years apart. You knew what to do but it didn't feel right. Foreign, just like the car you sat in.

Joker saw the hesitation in your eyes and tossed you a genuine smile. "Pretty girl... look. At. Me. You got this."

He guided your finger to waver over the trigger before stepping back. You noticed the safety was off and started to panic more. "J-Joker! I-I get it, they're rubber! You proved your point!"

Joker robbed you of a choice. His finger brushed against yours as he helped coil your finger around the trigger.

The loud bang made you scream and shut your eyes. You heard Joker grunt and fearing the worst, you dropped the gun. You dove forward patting him for any sources of blood but to your astonishment, Joker was laughing.

The rich sound dumped ice water on your nerves.

Joker was still standing, and he wasn't dead despite you aiming at his abdomen. He kept laughing while lifting up his clothes to reveal the impact area already turning a nasty shade of red.

"Oh my God, you're okay!" You started crying anew. Joker rolled his eyes at your hysterics and cradled your sobbing face.

"Shhh shhh stop cryin'... ya see Bunny? Rubber bullets. Do you believe me now?" Joker grinned when you furiously nodded your head. "Silly girl." He made a promise.

'I will never hurt you.'

Your tears vaporized the moment Joker bent down to kiss you. This is the version of Joker you missed. Sweet, overwhelming, and unequivocally, all yours.

The past few days you were bereft of Joker's addicting presence. Back in Gotham, it was just you and J for days on end huddled up in your penthouse with no distractions. You craved that pure intimacy the two of you created in the very beginning of this complex relationship.

Cooking for J and silent afternoons spent in your living room. The fervent touches under the sheets with only the moonlight bearing witness..

You missed him more than you realized.

The Joker you knew would never jeopardize his relations with you if it was within his power. He promised you twice that he would never hurt you and so far, his word reminded true. You kicked yourself for almost ruining things, all because you didn't have enough context.

Joker didn't kill your dad and uncle. They were okay, just like J was.

You repeated that sentence like a mantra in your head even as Joker stole your oxygen and flooded your brain with dopamine. His kisses were simply intoxicating.

He pulled back to let you breathe and he adored hearing your meek whine as he did so.

You pawed at his suit, all but tugging him inside the SUV. Joker took one look at the hazy gleam in your e/c eye and bam, he was a goner. You sucked him right into your orbit.

Nothing ever got past Joker.

He took pride studying everything Y/n L/n related like an attentive scholar, and he knew exactly what you wanted based off of your body language. He nodded and without a word, he crawled inside the SUV.

Much to your confusion, he proceeded to close the hatch after him. "J... what are you doing?"

The trunk door closed, trapping you inside with a silent Joker hovering above you. The hour had grown late, making it darker than before inside the cramped space. The close quarters sat heavy on your chest and Joker watched it heave in rapt interest.

He admired your old high school alumni T-shirt and the baggy cargo pants you wore although he would prefer if they were off of you instead.

Your eyes were wider than saucers watching Joker play with the drawstrings of your pants.

"Gimme a color." Joker asked out of the blue.

"Huh?"

You were a bit confused, and it was evident by your adorable head tilt. He slowly maneuvered your legs so they wrapped around his waist. You were already flat on your back, but you could tell Joker was seeking out your comfort.

Your long forgotten book bag was moved to serve as a pillow of sorts and once everything was to Joker's liking, he asked you again. "If you don't want this.. Give. Me. A. Color."

Then it clicked. The traffic system!

The tips of your ears flushed red. Joker wanted to do it in here? You gulped and glanced at your surroundings. There was some leg room now that Joker straddled you proper, but was it safe?

You never had sex in a car before much less in the trunk. How were you supposed to know if this was feasible? You had the split second idea to call Morgana for advice. If it was sexual in nature, she was an expert.

Joker hummed to himself and began removing his clothes while you mulled things over. He would never coerce you into anything you didn't want to do. You were in control here.

He was looking out the windows for any sign of danger when he finally heard you murmur, "Green."

Joker knew your natural curiosity would prevail.

He flashed you an easy smile. "The best one." With that said, Joker dove down and kissed you again, but this time, his hands were actively removing your clothes.

It wasn't fair that he was the only one naked. Well partially; he couldn't get his pants and shoes off all the way in the limited space.

He broke away from your lips so he could pull your shirt up and off your body. It was discarded somewhere towards the front of the SUV; Joker didn't care where. His current mission was tasting your lips again. You tasted like fruit flavored drinks and [insert favorite candy].

In essence, Joker was on cloud nine. He found your lips in the darkness with ease.

Curse him and his nighttime vision! You were left fumbling in the dark whereas he could see clearly. He used that to his advantage. Joker's hands were warm on your skin as he pushed your bra straps down.

"Don't tear it.." You warned Joker right as he tugged the cups down and sucked on your nipples. Your fingers instantly buried themselves into Joker's hair. He could rip all your bras to pieces if that was his goal.

The things Joker could get away with using that skilled tongue of his.

He swirled it around your areola before biting down hard enough to extract an airy moan from your lips. His emerald eyes flickered up to savor your reaction as he let go of one nipple to suckle on the other. His hands joined the fun and kneaded your breasts just the way you liked it.

It was incredible but you needed something else. You tried pushing Joker's head down south, he wouldn't budge. You turned to whining. "J.... Please.. I.."

He sighed before sitting back on his knees. You removed your bra (before he got the chance to tear it) and shivered when his hands finally slid down to your legs.

His Light was so desperate, it was so cute. "Shhhh be patient. I gotta ah, make sure, my girl is ready."

Joker rubbed soothing circles on your calves, and he clicked his tongue when you jumped at his touch. "See? I've neglected my Goddess for sooooo long, she's uh, shying away from me! Let's get errr re-acquaint-ed, mkay?"

Mind you that it had only been a few days; Joker had a point.

You bit your lip and ordered your body to cooperate with you here. Joker's touch wasn't malicious. You trusted his hands. You wanted this.

Still your leg jumped uncontrollably, kicking the wall as Joker untied your cargo pants. He just shook his head, wrestling them off your legs—although he eyed you through his long lashes when you inhaled sharply.

"You doin' alright, doll?" He noticed you concentrating too hard, all with a deep frown on your face. You were so stressed that you weren't enjoying the moment. That wouldn't do.

Joker arched an eyebrow when you didn't respond to his question, so he angled his thumb to rub gentle circles on your panty clad clit. "Listen to my voice, Y/n and breathe."

He heard your heavy sigh, and he reveled in your body shivering when his thumb stroked your sensitive nub harder. Your hand shot out and grabbed ahold of his forearm. Your eyes pleaded for more and he felt obligated to obey.

"I'm gonna take your panties off. That okay doll? Hm. They're soaked anyway.." Joker mumbled that last part more to himself but still, he waited for your shy okayto grace his eardrums.

Joker moved slowly so you could watch; he peeled your ruined panties off and shoved them into his pocket.

He gave you a cheeky wink when you noticed. "For later." He smiled. Next, Joker caressed your knees before parting them. "Ohhhhh Bunny..." He swore under his breath.

The sight of heaven between your thighs would never get old. Joker wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of his days worshipping his Light.

"Just look at her.. so juicy and sweet." Joker watched your juices trickle out of your pussy and make a mess of yourself.

He knew you tasted divine; how could he forget— yet he had to stop himself from diving right in. He didn't want to scare you since your emotions were all over the place tonight.

Joker wanted to take take take till you couldn't think any more, but that would be too much in your delicate situation.

One more sudden change of emotions and your brain would check out early. To remedy that, you needed soft touches and a steady flow of affirmations.

He forced his gaze away from your weeping center to meet your eyes. "I'm gonna treat ya right, Y/n. Will you let me to do that?"

Your firm nod gave Joker the green light to continue.

The road J parked on was secluded but it wouldn't remain that way forever. He needed to get a move on or waste this precious time with you.

He could worship you properly once he got you back in Gotham. Right now, Joker just needed his Light and you needed him.

With one last look outside the window, (nothing too concerning) Joker flipped you over so that you were perched atop of him. Your startled cry was adorable however it fizzled out into a moan when you felt Joker's stiff cock rutting against your folds. He rocked into you, gazing up at his Light in awe.

Just grinding on his cock felt amazing. "J..." you sighed out.

"Gimme a color sweet thing."

Your hips jerked violently after hearing the new endearment. That was a new addition to J's growing collection. Sweet thing. You kinda liked it.

Joker's dick was fully saturated with your juices by the time you moaned out your answer. He could hear how wet you were, it was music to his ears.

J's hands found a place on your hips, and you knew there would be bruises there by the end of the night. "Mm... I missed my Princess. Can I show you just. how. much?" He asked.

You were still nodding when Joker's leaking tip pushed past your entrance.

Joker watched as your face scrunched up in pleasure as inch after thick inch of his dick invaded your pussy. The feeling was incredible, and Joker failed to hold back his throaty groan about halfway in.

The sound of it sent liquid fire straight to your core.

You let your own moans spill freely from your lips. All of your senses became undone at the intense stretch you were experiencing, and it got better and better. It was so much all at once, Joker got his wish.

The last thoughts to dart across your brain were ones of doubt and disbelief.

When was the last time you and Joker had sex? Was he always this thick or was it just your mind exaggerating his length? But you felt each pulse and vein rubbing against your walls. There was no way you could make this up. He was splitting you in half!

The invasion seemed to be never-ending, and Joker's glowing eyes took in every expression you made as he continued to stuff you full.

Your pouty lips fell open in a silent moan and beads of sweat dotted your brow. Joker couldn't look away even if he tried. And why would he? The moonlight cut through the back window and blessed you with its celestial glow. You tipped your head back as if on command, giving Joker a view of a lifetime.

He was entranced by the Goddess straddling him. You were truly a work of art. Like a deity sent down to be his undoing.

And what a way to perish, set ablaze by your light.

You choked back a moan when you met resistance. Finally. Joker came to a rest, balls deep inside you. You wiggled your hips to get more comfy. All it did was grind his tip more onto your g spot.

"Good girl, I was lookin' for that." He smiled at you like the dopey simp he was. You were perfect in his eyes, already whining.

Honestly, what miracle did he do in this life to deserve a goddess like you? He wasn't so sure if he did deserve you and that made him cherish you even more.

This much goodness towards a corrupted man like himself was a rarity. Joker swore not to f__k this up.

He knew you needed a moment to adjust, being on top allowed you to feel everything times a hundred. Joker reached up to cup your breast, kissing and kneading as he pleased. In the meantime, he fed into your praise kink, whispering sweet nothings to you.

You soaked up each one like a sponge.

Joker bit back a groan feeling you subconsciously clench around his cock.

Could you feel him throbbing inside of you? He hoped you could. Ignoring his primal need to pound into from below was maddening but he'd do anything for the sake of your comfort. He could wait until you were ready, and his patience was soon rewarded.

You parted those gorgeous lips of yours and said the magic words. "Please move, J. I need.."

"I know Bun."

Within seconds, you were being lifted up before gravity brought you hurling back down onto Joker's cock.

The first few thrusts stole the air from your lungs, but overtime Joker adopted a steady rhythm and it became clear, you weren't the only one craving this.

Joker was just as needy (if not more) than you.

His guttural groans turned your insides into goo and the wet slap of his dick slamming into you over and over and over, unplugged your brain right from the socket. You cried out when Joker dug his heels into the floor and lost himself to the pleasure.

His head fell back against the floorboard, and he laughed in between moans. "Did ya miss... meeee, Bunny? Huh? What's that? Aww, you c-can't think straight... when your pussy getting railed thisss good? Ahh, s'alright, I ngh, f- f__k, I missed you."

His feral yet sincere tone made you clench down unexpectedly and lose your balance bouncing on his dick.

You fell onto Joker's abdomen, and he grunted feeling the fresh gunshot wound you gave him throb. Rubber or lead, it still hurt.

Not like a little pain stopped Joker from hugging you to his chest and pounding up even harder into your cunt. You tried to express your sentiments yet only incoherent babbles were heard.

Joker had reduced your brain to mush.

Although a trace of guilt still lingered in your mind. You thought about your dad and uncle at the rendezvous spot. Were they in pain just like Joker or worse?

You were so caught up in your remaining thoughts that you didn't notice Joker getting frustrated.

He was doing everything in his power to make you de-stress and forget about everything, but you weren't cooperating. You were so close to being a mindless slut for him but you had to ruin it by thinking.

His Bunny was never one to follow orders. It was his fault for expecting the impossible.

He was forced to take things a step further. Your knotless braids looked enticing and Joker grinned wolfishly right as he grabbed a handful of them.

Your throaty moan echoed throughout the SUV as a result. You clamped a hand over your mouth to silence it, but Joker was faster and smacked it away.

"NO! Stop thaT! It's just yoo~oou and me, Princess. So scream. Show me.. just how much, you ngh.. missed me."

He gritted his teeth and sped up his powerful thrusts. "Show me! C'mon be a good girl 'n open that... filthy little mouth.. ahh a-and scream! Do. It!"

J pulled your braids harder, forcing your spine into a painful arch. You felt exactly like a doll being bent to Joker's desires.

You cried out—the words jumbled up and way too high in pitch to comprehend, nevertheless, Joker understood what you wanted to convey. "Aww? ThaT much?"

He used his other hand to smack your behind and quickly rub the sting out. "My turn. I missed you... this! Much!"

A series of slaps had you sobbing in pleasure. Each slap was harder than the last and you heard Joker's sadistic laughter ring out inside the vehicle. He was everywhere at once; deep in your guts, lips on your neck, eager hands roaming your skin. You couldn't handle this much affection.

It lowered your inhibitions and loosened your tongue.

"J... I ah!" You sobbed feeling Joker lick a trail up your neck and bite down, "I t-t-trust you!"

He snorted at your delayed response from earlier that was finally being processed. Dicking you down was emptying that pretty little head of yours after all. You were a babbling mess riding his cock and he loved every minute of it.

Yet your statement made him lose his pace for a millisecond. Trust was everything to you and the way you said it with such conviction...

It wasn't just a random comment.

His eyes widened at what you were trying to get across. "Oh Bunny. Shh I know ya do.. I know." Joker let go of your hair and snaked his hand down to where you needed him the most.

You were rocking your hips in crazy figure eights, when a new dose of pleasure hit your body. Joker was rubbing foreign shapes onto your throbbing clit, with a sadistic glee.

Your eyes snapped open to stare at him and he greedily inhaled the shaky exhale that you moaned.

He knew you were close. You were one compliment away from shattering into a thousand pieces— yet he wanted this orgasm to crescendo. Joker wanted to wind you up past the point of no return and witness the moment you unraveled.

It was a test of patience; good things came to those who waited.

You could feel that heat creeping up your spine. You honed in on the sensation and made it your objective.

Fat tears dotted your eyelashes, your thighs quivered, and a sheen of sweat made your dark complexion glisten like gold. You were almost there. Joker could feel you clenching down on him intermittently.

Just a little more and Joker would see nirvana and it all started with a whimper of his name.

Joker swore he could cum to the sight of you in ecstasy. Your e/c eyes rolled back and a sexy smile bloomed across your face before you came so beautifully for him. A dam full of emotions burst through and he was so lucky to be doused in it. Joker held you close as you slumped forward, still chanting his name under your breath.

Honestly, he should've been the one praising you, not the other way around. He was a lost cause compared to your divinity. But that was a debate for another day.

Joker could see your light shining through especially when you shuddered with aftershocks. It almost felt forbidden to see you this vulnerable, although it inspired him to protect you.

You were boneless lying on Joker. Just a twitching mess trying to catch your breath.

Joker brushed his fingers down your spine, waiting for a physical response (a verbal one was out of the question) and he definitely got one. Your walls fluttered around his stiff cock making him involuntarily thrust up into you.

"J..!" You thought for sure he came with you. How was he still erect?

He started to laugh— warm and fuzzy in the crook of your neck. "Ahhh remember, I'm.. insatiable my dear."

You heard a smile within that statement and Joker wasn't no time flipping you onto your back.

You did remember. Joker was the greediest man you've ever met. He could never get enough of you and he proudly told you that each time he bedded you.

Speaking of. Joker had a mad case of bed head.

His hair was wild from your hands playing in it and you loved how the moonlight caught in the unusual hue. Your fingers itched you card through the strands once more.

Joker looked absolutely handsome, makeup and all, despite most of it being smudged and/or melted off. You could only imagine what your skin looked like streaked red and white after his constant affection to it.

"I still need you. Is that uhh, okay?" Joker mumbled.

As if you couldn't deny this man anything. Somehow Gotham City's most notorious criminal, had you in a chokehold. You were so down bad for Joker it wasn't funny anymore.

And so, another piece of your defenses fell to let Joker in.

You reached up and swiped your thumb along Joker's red lips and he went crosseyed to follow the motion. "Do whatever feels right." You said.

Joker's eyes widened, remembering those exact same words from the last time the two of you were intimate. Adding to the déjà vu, he responded in kind.

"You'll be the death of me woman."

He pulled out, only to slide back inside your pussy—mimicking the tides at sea. Slow and steady, Joker worked you right back up to the precipice; and he didn't tear his gaze away from yours in the process.

The SUV windows were fogged over and the frame was most likely rocking in tandem with Joker's powerful thrusts—yet neither of you cared about being caught.

Right now, the only thing on the brain was each other.

Your head was fuzzy with another orgasm simmering on the surface and Joker was right there with you, ready to send the both of you over. You could tell he was close by his erratic thrusts and unabashed moans.

Words were not needed this far into the night. You looped your arms around Joker's neck and dragged him down for a kiss.

It was sloppy, really just a clash of hot air and lips, but it got the job done.

Joker leaned in close to give you deep, toe-curling thrusts into your twitching cunt. You squeezed him so tight he could barely pound into you, yet he found a way.

He repositioned your hips and kept your legs locked around his waist. You had nowhere to go except over the edge.

Green eyes watched intently as the first wave of pleasure washed over you. You were absolutely mesmerizing.

Your mouth fell open and nothing escaped but airy gasps. You looked up at J in shock that an orgasm so powerful could sneak up on you like this.

Joker grinned and cheered you on with coos and groans, not slowing his pace for a second. He couldn't stop; not when you felt this good. Just a little more.. he was right there..

Out of nowhere your acrylic nails sank into Joker's back, leaving angry red marks, some bubbling with blood—it was the spark he needed to burn out of control.

His lashes fluttered beautifully before he too succumbed to pleasure. Feeling him pulsate as he flooded your walls white was worth the wait. His face was tingling yet he couldn't stop until every last drop found its way into you. This was the only offering he had to give. You had to take it.

Joker collapsed on top of you with your name slipping off his tongue like a prayer.

Seconds? Minutes? It could've been hours that the two of you rested there. Time was irrelevant as Joker nuzzled his nose into your neck.

You let his gentle kisses and praises lull you to sleep.

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pedrito-friskito · 2 years ago

Text

strawberry wine - joel miller x fem!reader

before - part four

series masterlist | main masterlist | read on ao3

it’s almost the end of the summer, and everything is about to change.

a/n: pls don’t yell at me too much (also for full effect, listen to Still by Noah Kahan - it came on while I was writing this and I burst into tears….)

word count: 4.5k

warnings: MY BLOG IS 18+, MINORS DNI, angst, fluff, unprotected p-in-v, oral (m and f receiving), intense sex, confessions and hard conversations, I apologize but for the sake of the plot we must persevere!

✨follow @friskito-library and turn on notifications for updates on new works/chapters✨

You’re not expecting the knock at the door.

It’s nearly three weeks now, since your night at Joel’s house. The following days were nothing short of blissful, keeping up your almost-daily coffee routine, stolen kisses in the hardware store, another dinner at a different restaurant after Joel swung a job that paid him nicely. You took him to the movies, sat in the back corner of the dark theatre and let him stick his tongue down your throat when your minds started to wander away from the screen. When he could, he stopped by in the morning to drive you to work, picked you up on his way home when your schedules matched.

Your meeting Tommy comes as a surprise; he followed Joel into the store one day, the pair of the arguing about something or other. Joel had stopped short when he spotted you at the end of the aisle, and you hadn’t notice the brothers standing there until Tommy loudly declared, “That’s her! Isn’t it? That’s gotta be her!”

Before you really knew what was happening, you were being swept up into a bear hug, nearly lifted off your feet with the force, and meeting Joel’s sympathetic eyes over his brother’s shoulder.

“Tommy Miller,” he introduced himself after putting you back on your feet. You shook his hand with a laugh, offering your own name, and he grinned broadly. There was definitely a resemblance between the brothers, Tommy’s hair a few shades darker, his shoulders not as broad, his face handsome in a different way than Joel, but handsome all the same. “I gotta thank you, honey,” he told you, still gripping your hand with both of his. “My brother has not been able to shut up about you, never seen him so happy.”

Over his shoulder, you saw Joel go bright red, rubbing the back of his neck. “Tommy.”

“Am I wrong?” his brother shot back, tugging on your hand and tucking you under his shoulder. You just laughed, resting your hand against his back. “Not that I blame you, brother. She’s just as pretty as you said.” He looked down at you with a broad grin. “You are very pretty.”

You sputtered on another laugh. “Thank you, Tommy.”

Joel glared at his brother. “Go find the plaster, would you?” he grumbled, and grabbed for you, tucking both arms around you and shoving at his brother’s shoulder.

As soon as Tommy disappeared into the next aisle, Joel glanced left and right to make sure the coast was clear, and then his mouth covered yours, a hot kiss that had your toes curling in your shoes. He crowded you up against the paint cans you’d been rearranging, curling his hands along the edge of the shelves while you cupped his face in your hands, scratching your nails through his beard.

“My stupid fuckin’ brother,” he grumbled in your ear, and you giggled when he kissed your neck, teeth nipping slightly. “Spillin’ all my secrets.”

“He seems sweet,” you replied, giggling harder when his hands pinched at your ribs, tickling you. “Joel!”

That had been a week ago, and you’re standing in the kitchen, musing over the moment, your heart still racing over the phone call you’d received when you got home, when you hear the knock. Your mind is a mess, a slur of memories and whispers and feelings.

You school your face into something happier than you’re feeling when you open the door, a bright-eyed Joel Miller standing on your front porch, his truck idling by the curb, hands stuffed into his pockets.

“Wanna go for a drive?”

You nod wordlessly, grabbing your cellphone and your keys and walking out of the house, locking the door behind you. He gives you a soft kiss before tugging you down the porch steps, fitting you under his arm, fingers toying with the shoulder of your — his — shirt.

“I’m never gettin’ this back, am I?”

“Not on your life, Miller,” you reply, forcing a grin.

He chuckles quietly as he opens the passenger door for you. Your eyes dart to the backseat as you get in, the bench seat piled with pillows and blankets and a six-pack of beer.

“What’s all that?” you ask, gesturing towards the back as he gets into the driver’s seat. A broad grin spreads across his mouth as he shifts into drive, pulling away from the curb.

“Some place I wanna show you.”

You’re both quiet as he drives, your hands linked together on the gearshift, the Led Zeppelin cassette you’d bought him playing low over the truck’s speakers. Your eyes wander; the dark sky ahead, the blur of streetlights and traffic lights as he takes you out of the suburbs. Joel turns the truck away from the city when he reaches the highway, the bright lights giving way to telephone poles and occasional houses, sprawling farmland and wide open spaces.

Your gaze always seems to come back to him, the way his eyes are glued to the road ahead, the way he occasionally lifts your links hands and kisses your knuckles, the way he hums along with the song that’s playing. It does nothing to ease the ache in your chest, and you slump sideways a little, leaning your head on his shoulder as he drives.

It’s a long time before he pulls down a dirt road, trees lining either side for about a mile before cutting off, revealing giant fields, dotted with trees. He stops the truck in a large clearing, the wheels kicking up dust as he hits the brakes, cuts the engine. “C’mon, darlin’.”

You’re speechless as you slide out of the truck, your gaze immediately pulled upwards. The sky is dark and bigger than you’ve ever felt it, a perfect ombré from black to navy to a lighter shade of blue towards the horizon. The moon hangs bright above you, a perfect crescent shape smudged with a few clouds in an otherwise clear sky.

And the stars.

The sight makes you cover your mouth with your hands, your eyes wide and lined with tears as you stare up at them. You’ve never seen so many of them, the light pollution from the city always blocking most of them out. But here? You can see every single one.

You almost jump when Joel comes up behind you, slipping his arms around your waist and tugging you back against his chest. He pecks your cheek softly before straightening, resting his chin on top of your head and staring up with you. “Really is somethin’, isn’t it?”

“Joel, it’s beautiful,” you whisper, leaning back into him, revelling in his warmth. “How did you find this spot?”

“Tommy told me about it, actually,” he murmurs, his mouth against the crown of your head. “Told him I wanted to bring you somewhere special and he brought me out here. As soon as I saw it, I knew I had to bring you.”

You shake your head slowly, unable to pull your eyes from the night sky, a new star appearing every time you blink. You can make out different constellations, the North Star, the few planes dotting the atmosphere.

“C’mon,” Joel whispers, squeezing you softly. “Let’s get comfy.”

It doesn’t take long, the pair of you gathering the pillows and blankets from the backseat and piling them into the truck’s empty bed. You sit quietly for a while, Joel cracking open a beer for each of you, you sitting between his spread knees, leaning back against his chest.

You’re half-sure he can hear the way your breathing shakes, see the way your hands twitch when he threads his fingers with yours. You chew the inside of your cheek until it bleeds, the beer making pain spark the inside of your mouth, but it’s nothing compared to the ache in your chest, the heaviness that’s set up shop.

You have to tell him.

You turn to look at him, but before you can get a word out, he’s kissing you, diving his hand into your hair, pressing his mouth to yours. You can’t help but sigh into it, sinking into the delicious warmth he offers, the taste you’re trying to commit to memory, the feeling of safety and comfort that always seems to find you when he’s around.

“Joel, wait, I—” you start, but words tumble out of his mouth before you can stop him.

“I’m falling in love with you,” he says, his voice soft, a low rumble that seeps into your chest, doubles the ache that’s already there, the happy-mixed-with-sad that lines your eyes with tears. He sees them, you know he does, because he adjusting himself instantly, your face between his hands, swiping the tear from your cheek as it falls. “Baby, what’s wrong? I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—”

“I have to tell you something,” you murmur, your voice cracking on the words, and your heart nearly snaps in two at the expression on his face, the furrowed brow and the concerned glint in his eyes.

You applied for the internship in Boston fresh out of college. One of your professors recommended you for the position, you did the interview before moving to Austin, and when you hadn’t heard back after a few weeks, you let yourself forget about it, content to spend your summer with your family, to figure your life out later. You still had time; you didn’t have to get it all figured out yet.

But then…

“They called me today,” you tell him, sinking back as his hands slowly drop, leaving your skin tingling where he’d been touching you. “They had a last minute opening, someone backed out, and they said it’s mine if I want it. I…” You trail off, shaking your head, dropping it back on your shoulders and staring up at the beautiful sky he’s shown you. “I don’t know what to do, Joel.”

When you finally find the strength to look at him again, you’re surprised your heart doesn’t burst from your chest. He has his fist pressed to his mouth, other arm resting on his knee, his eyes boring into you. There are tears in them, his lashes clumped together beneath his eyes, and you bottom lip quivers.

“I never expected you,” you say quietly, feeling another hot tear slide down your cheek. “I never anticipated coming here and meeting you, falling for y—”

He cuts you off, his hand flashing out and curling around the back of your neck, pulling you into his arms. You go willingly, collapsing into his chest with a sob, curling your hands in the fabric of his t-shirt. You stay like that for a long while, Joel rocking you side to side, one hand rubbing shapes between your shoulder blades. Face pressed into the curve of his neck, you cry until the collar of his shirt is soaked, the unfairness of it all crawling up your throat each time you think you’re okay.

Finally, you get the question out. “What are we gonna do, Joel?”

He tugs on your hair lightly, making you tilt your head back against his shoulder, so he can see your face. The streaks of wet on his cheek makes you whimper, reaching up and rubbing your thumb through the trails. “We’re gonna keep doin’ what we’re doin’,” he tells you, his mouth twitching as he scratches his nails against your scalp. “We’ve got the rest of the summer, right?” You nod, fresh tears filling your eyes. “And then you’re gonna go to Boston. I won’t let you throw this away, baby, not for me.”

“Joel—” you start to protest, but he quiets you with a soft kiss, thumb pressed to your cheek.

“No, baby,” he murmurs, lifting his jaw and kissing your forehead next. “It’ll be okay. Won’t let you go until I have to, you hear me?”

He stays true to his word.

The rest of the summer is spent in each other’s company, every chance you get. You go to bars with him and Tommy some evenings, spend more nights in the bed of Joel’s truck, staring up at the stars. He keeps up appearances at the hardware store, still kisses you with the same insistence he had before you told him about Boston.

There’s something different between you, you know. A sort of anticipation, both of you waiting for the other shoe to drop, but adamant to enjoy the time you have left. There are evidently more tears, but Joel does his best to kiss them away, and you let yourself get a little lost in him, refusing to count the days, just savouring every moment you have.

You meet Sarah accidentally. You thought Joel had said six, he thought seven, and when you knock on the Miller’s front door, you’re more than surprised when Sarah opens the door, her head cocked to the side, eyes that are a dead ringer for Joel’s peering at you.

“Who are you?”

Joel appears behind his daughter a moment later, balking at you slightly as he puts a hand on her shoulder. “Honey, this is my…” He pauses, searching for the right word.

You stick out your hand, offering it to Sarah, along with your name. “I’m a good friend of your dad’s,” you say, the word making you want to cry, but you school your face into a smile. “You know the hardware store down on Main Street?”

Sarah perks up, her eyes shining up at you as Joel moves her to the side to let you in. “Next to the ice cream parlour?”

The next smile you have is genuine. “That’s the one.”

She warms up to you quickly, talking a mile a minute, insisting she show you her soccer trophy and disappearing up the stairs to go get it. Joel grabs your hand once she’s out of sight, tugging you against his chest and kissing your cheek. “You didn’t have to say that,” he mumbles, and you knock your forehead lightly into his. “I could have—”

“No,” you reply, shaking your head. “It’ll just confuse her; I don’t want that.”

He nods, agreeing with you, but the sadness in his eyes makes your chest ache.

“Here it is!” Sarah declares as she bounds down the stairs, the gold trophy shining in the kitchen light. You and Joel nearly spring apart, and you gasp as animatedly as you can.

Tommy arrives a half hour later to take Sarah, and you nearly fall over when she throws her arms around your waist, hugging you goodbye after Joel pecks her on the head. “Bye!”

“Bye, Sarah,” you say, and as soon as she’s out the door with Tommy, you sink into the kitchen chair, putting your face in your hands. Joel sinks into a crouch in front of you, a warm hand on your knee, rubbing a slow circle.

“Baby,” he murmurs, and you collapse forward, throwing your arms around his neck.

“I don’t wanna go,” you tell him.

It’s tomorrow. Your time is up, the summer almost officially over. The lease on your new apartment in Boston starts at midnight, and you’re leaving late in the morning, the two-day trek to your new city already making you anxious. Your stuff is already packed, a few boxes already loaded into the truck of your car, proof that this is actually happening. But knowing you’re leaving him? That hits harder.

“I know, darlin’,” he drawls in your ear, a crack to his voice that makes you sob. He puts both arms around your torso, and your legs wrap around his middle, ankles locked against his back. You keep your face buried in his throat as he lifts you, hands under your ass as he turns towards the stairs, carries you up them.

You stand in the centre of his bedroom a moment later, chewing at your thumb as he walks to the window, pulls the drapes until just a sliver of sunlight fits through them. The sun is already starting to set, the days growing shorter, and the thought of winter in Boston, winter without Joel to keep you warm, brings fresh tears to your eyes.

“Hey,” he says softly, reaching out to cup your jaw as he comes to stand in front of you, catching your gaze and holding it. “Don’t think about tomorrow, yeah? Just be with me. Please?”

You just nod.

It’s slow, slower than you’ve yet to have him. Clothes come off a piece at a time, hands mapping out bare skin as soon as it’s revealed, mouth pressed to the curves of bones and the slopes of muscles. You memorize the pattern of his freckles, the smatter along his neck, the few that dot his cheeks. He holds you in his arms, kisses every inch of your face, catching your tears on his tongue, murmuring softly to you that it’s okay.

That he loves you.

“You don’t have to say it back,” he told you, a few days after you told him about Boston. He was holding your hand, the two of you cuddled together on his couch, his thumb rubbing your knuckles. “I don’t expect you to, or anythin’, I just…I just want you to know.”

But you couldn’t stop yourself from saying it then, and you can’t stop it now. It bubbles up out of you, want and need and desperation heavy on your tongue as you hold each other. Passion hangs in the air like electricity, sparking brighter with every move you make.

You revel in every single moment, when he spreads you out on his bed, the mattress familiar beneath you, you commit it to memory, the way he looks between your knees, the bulk of his frame, the way his hair is messy from your fingers, the way his eyes stay glued to yours as he touches you, rubs his thumb over your nerves, laves his tongue over your heat.

You return it in kind, pushing him down on the mattress after he’s made you cum twice, once on his fingers, then again on his tongue. He groans when you push his thighs wide, making a home for yourself between them, nipping at every bit of skin you can reach. He locks both hands in your hair when you take his cock in your mouth, fingers curling around the bit you can’t fit. The salty taste of him is welcome, and you refuse to let up, letting him hit the back of your throat, bobbing your head until he’s cumming down your throat, hot and thick.

You catch your breath for a few minutes, crawling up his body, hooking your knee over his hip as he holds you, kisses you, brushes the hair from your face. “My pretty baby,” he murmurs, and you do your best to ignore the twinge in your chest, “beautiful girl.”

It’s not long until he’s hard again, your kisses and moans and touches bringing his body back to life. He pulls you on top of him completely, pushes himself into you. You grip the headboard with both hands, sighing when he leans up and bites at your nipple. He starts slow, his hands on your hips guiding you along him, the feeling sparking up your spine just this side of not enough.

“Tell me, baby,” he grunts at you, one hand dropping slightly, giving you a light spank that makes you jolt, clenching down on him. “You want it harder?”

“Yes,” you beg, breathing his air as his pace slows almost completely. “Joel, baby, please.”

“C’mere.” He pulls at your arms, yanks you down until you’re chest to chest. Then he plants his feet on the mattress, one arm around your waist, the other banded around your shoulders, hand in your hair.

He fucks you hard, hips pistoning up into you, slamming his cock deep, hitting against that gummy spot that makes your entire body quake. You’ve never cum as hard as you do, your entire body going completely taut for one blinding moment, your blood turned to flame in a drawn-out instant. He nips at your lips, up your jaw, nibbles at your earlobe.

“That’s my girl,” he grunts. “Fuckin’ made for me, weren’t you?”

You nod frantically, your eyes hazy, every single one of your nerves prickled with pleasure as he keeps hammering into you. You don’t want this to stop, it can’t stop, please don’t ever let it stop—

A flash, and you’re flipped on your back, his cock still pressed so deep you can feel it in your throat. You grip him hard, nails digging into his hips so hard you’re half sure you’re going to draw blood, but he doesn’t seem to care. He just keeps going, bracing one arm over your head, mashing his mouth to yours as he drives into you, his brow furrowed.

You feel him shudder, feel that spread of warmth through your lower half, hear him murmur your name. Feel your heart shatter into a million pieces when he kisses you softly, drags the tip of his nose against yours, murmurs those three words again.

Neither of you move, for a long while. You stay there, him still pressed inside you, your legs spread around his body, your arms folded around his neck. Soft kisses are shared, quiet sweet nothings traded until your eyes fill with tears again.

“It’s okay, baby,” he tells you, catching your tears on his thumb, pressing his mouth to your jaw. “It’s gonna be okay.”

You’re starting to wonder who he’s trying to convince.

“Tommy agreed to take Sarah for the night,” Joel tells you when you return from the bathroom, one of his t-shirts covering your upper half. “So you can stay,” he pauses, rubs his hand up the back of his head, “if you want to.”

You throw yourself back into his bed, curling around him. “Of course I want to.”

Your eyes blink open the next morning, and the dread sinks in completely.

Joel’s breath is hot on the nape of your neck. He’s sprawled on his back, one arm extended beneath your head. You turn immediately, curling into his side, pressing your face into his neck. “Mmm,” he grumbles, putting both arms around you, turning his mouth against your forehead. “Your nose is cold.”

“You’re just warm,” you grumble back, kissing his throat, letting your hand roam his chest, over his stomach.

You rub your palm across his hips, and he groans, lifting his hand to bury it in your hair. “D’we have time?” he asks, his voice thick with sleep, and you lift your head, bleary eyes squinting at the alarm clock.

“Yeah,” you tell him, settling back against him. “We have time.”

He makes love to you. Every moment is a slow drag, the complete opposite of the fast and rough you’d had the night before. But somehow, it’s exactly what you need, feeling him deeper, holding him closer. You’re memorizing every moment, every rise and dip to his outline, the way his mouth tastes, the way he moves.

You don’t want to let go, but you know you have to.

You make breakfast together, toaster waffles and coffee, sat at his kitchen table with quiet conversation. After you’ve eaten, you get dressed, stealing another flannel from his closet, a light blue with white and grey. “You stealin’ more of my clothes?” he asks, coming up behind you, kissing the side of your neck.

“I’ll give the other one back,” you reply, doing up the buttons. “Gotta take a little piece of you with me.”

“Keep ‘em both,” he murmurs against your skin, squeezing your hip. “They’re yours.”

You stomach is in knots as you leave Joel’s, as he drives the short distance from his house to yours. Your arms are wrapped around one of his, your face pressed against his shoulder. “All your stuff packed?” he asks, and you nod, biting back the tears that are already starting to form. He parks at the curb, cuts the engine, and lifts his arm, letting you slide under it, bringing you close to him. He kisses your temple, inhaling deeply, and you just sit there for a while, arms wrapped around each other, breathing slow.

It’s slow, as you get out of the truck. He opens the door for you like always, and when you’re reluctant to get out, he grabs your legs and drags you to the edge of the seat, letting you wrap your limbs around him as he lifts you out. He sets you on your feet on the curb, his brow lifting as he turns back to the truck. “I have somethin’ for you.”

You let out a little laugh as he reaches into the backseat and produces a silver baseball bat, a bright red bow wrapped around the handle. “What’s this for?” you ask, unable to stifle your giggles as he hands it to you.

“Boston’s a big city,” he mumbles, lifting a shoulder. “Keep it by your bed or something, just in case.” He reaches out, fingers on your cheek. “Keep yourself safe, yeah?”

You swing the bat lightly, a quick flick of your wrist. “Thank you.”

He blushes a little, opening his arms again when you lean the bat against the truck, stepping back into his embrace. You bury yourself in his chest, arms tight around his waist. “I’ll try and visit,” he says into your hair, inhaling lightly. Tears spring in your eyes again; you appreciate the sentiment, but you don’t expect him to drive cross-country, not when he has Sarah and his life and his job. And you know he couldn’t afford the plane ticket.

“I’ll be home at Christmas, hopefully,” you whisper back, and he nods.

“Call me when you get there?” he asks, and you lift your head to look at him. “And when you stop for the night.”

“Yes, Joel.”

“Don’t let those corporate assholes work you too hard and…” His voice drops, and you lift a hand to cup his cheek, your thumb riding edge of his beard. “Don’t forget about this, please? About us.”

“Can’t do that,” you tell him, a sad smile on your lips. A memory buzzes in the back of your hand, the two of you stood opposite sides of the counter at the hardware store. The worry of rejection crawling up the back of your throat when you’d boldly offered your number, when you told him you could just forget what had happened. Can’t do that.

“Maybe someday…” he starts, trailing off and you just nod, repeating his words.

He kisses you then, both arms tight around you, his mouth warm and tasting of toothpaste and that mistakable Joel Miller taste you know you won’t soon forget. He kisses you until you’re not quite sure where he ends and you begin, but you don’t care. You’re half sure your parents are watching from the window, but you don’t care.

It’s a long time before either of you pulls back, holding on as long as you possibly can.

“Take care of yourself, baby,” he mumbles in your ear, and you squeeze your eyes shut, holding him as tightly as you can.

“You, too.”

And then, two years later, nearly to the day, the world implodes.

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