#✧ — ⋆ verse ; dragon age ( rook ) .

[shift-shaping]

I don't think it's going to happen, like we'll be lucky to get one flirtatious line, but I am going to sit on the side of the street with my little 'let rook fuck solas' sign in the pouring rain and you guys can hand me coins for my delusions

[damallarky]

Veilguard Prologue, Part 2: Aisling

Guess who finally finished the second of her pre-Veilguard prologue fics? It's Part 2: Solavellan Bugaloo, and by Bugaloo, I mean an emotional rollercoaster. Things need to get worse before they get better, but don't worry, guys; things will get better. I promise.

Also, my Inquisitor, Aisling, has a stutter. I based it on my own experiences with my (admittedly very mild) stutter and the research I did, but if anyone has any suggestions on how to improve or more accurately represent stuttering, please let me know.

If you prefer, this fic is also on AO3. Check it out!

Summary:

Solas's plans will soon come to fruition, but before he can be free of his debt owed to the People, he must ensure the safety of those he loves most. That is how he finds himself at the home of his heart, the former Inquisitor Aisling Lavellan and her (and his) children.

AKA Solas and Aisling have their first honest conversation in a decade. Like I said, it's a rollercoaster. Buckle up, folks.

Mentions of my Inquisitor's children Ren and Neria.

-

Solas stood out on former Inquisitor Aisling Lavellan’s balcony, staring at the dazzling blue of the Rivaini coastline below. The Inquisitor and her family had moved to Rivain a year or two ago, ostensibly to be closer to Aisling’s older brother Arin, who was currently living with a certain Tevinter Magister, but also to get away from the ruins of their former home after the demon incident at Skyhold had nearly leveled the place.

Another one of Solas’s many, many failings.

However, Solas quite liked the new home Aisling had built for herself. It was a stone cottage that seemed to be built into the very cliffside it stood on, with stone steps leading directly to the beach and ocean below. Inside, it was homely, with plush carpets and furs, plants in the windows, and books scattered about the place. Momentos from Aisling’s time as the Inquisitor filled the various nooks and crannies, and nearly every wall had some example of art made by her children over the years.

Solas had wished he could have explored further and delved into the life Aisling had led the past decade. But he thought better of it, content to wait in her bedroom until she returned, as she had asked him to do.

Solas had informed Aisling of his arrival, of course. He had sought her out in the Fade and asked her permission to speak with her and see her. His plans were approaching fruition. In fact, they needed to be expedited if he was correct in his assumption on the strength of the Evunaris’s prison. He had taken the necessary precautions. Ran countless calculations to ensure the minimum amount of damage, but…

Solas’s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a door opening and closing. Slowly, he turned around and, for the first time since the Qunari invasion, he saw her. 

At thirty-four, former Inquisitor Aisling Lavellan looked much the same as she had the last time he had seen her, except, of course, for the prosthetic arm, a strange contraption of gears and lyrium that had the markings of a Dagna creation. Her hair was perhaps a bit longer, currently out of her usual braided updo and hanging in loose curls down her back. Her face, too, was perhaps a bit more worn, age and duty just barely beginning to etch fine lines onto her freckled skin. To Solas, however, she was just as beautiful now as she was when he first saw her in Haven all those years ago… a perfect creature in an imperfect world.

He and his kin had once claimed divinity, but before him was a true goddess. She with her soul that shone bright enough to pierce even the darkest parts of his ancient and wretched heart. His fire-haired lady, with her boundless compassion and endless curiosity. The top of her head just barely reached the bottom of Solas’s chin (perfect, he remembered, for tucking her close to him and breathing in the wool and amber scent of her hair), but still, Solas felt small underneath her gaze. He had to fight every instinct not to throw himself at her feet and declare himself her supplicant. To grovel and plead for her forgiveness for being the penitent sinner that he was.

He could not, however. Not while his people still suffered. Not while he still had to fix the mistakes of his past. A sinner he was indeed and there was penance still to be paid… the price of which was the loss of his heart.

He had only wished that he did not have to take her down with him.

Solas had hoped against hope that Aisling would forget him. That she would move on to someone else, someone younger and more worthy of her love. But as the years went on, she had only doubled down on her efforts to find him and bring him home to her. He had read the reports from his agents about how she would work herself to the point of exhaustion. Had listened to her desperate pleas and disparaging cries from the Fade.

He had wanted her so desperately to live, but instead, she was slowly killing herself, bit by bit. His plan to bring down the Veil would only be the final nail in her coffin.

Then, of course, there was Neria… And Ren.

Neria was, much like her mother, a complication he had not foreseen but, also like her mother, could not bring himself to regret. Solas had made so, so many mistakes in his life, but never would he consider Neria among them. Not when his heart swelled with pride as he read reports from his spies that mentioned her cleverness or nearly burst with love as he watched her from a distance while she played and explored the Fade with spirits of Joy and Curiosity.

Each night, Solas wanted desperately to reach out, to talk to her. To close the gap between himself and his daughter that he had unknowingly carved out nearly twelve years ago, and that only seemed to grow with each passing day.

He knew so little about his own child, and what details he did know were shallow things he knew only through his network of spies (and whatever Joy and Curiosity would share with him). He knew that she loved reading, but he did not know what her favorite books were. He knew she had inherited his sweet tooth, but he did not know which sweets she preferred. He knew that she had a love of animals, but which ones Solas could not say.

His child was practically a stranger to him as he was to her, and oh, did that make him want to weep.

Ren was similar, but different. Unlike Neria, Ren wasn’t Solas’s child by blood, but rather the child of Aisling’s late bond mate who had died before the little boy was even born. Though not related by blood, Solas still felt attached to him. Protective of him, even. He remembered fondly showing the then two-year-old how to build snowmen in Haven, or the shrieks of joy as Solas summoned wisps of light to play with him, or how the boy would toddle after him while he painted in the rotunda of Skyhold. Then, as he and Aisling grew closer, how he would help her put him to bed, telling him stories in Elvhen until the toddler drifted off into the Fade.

After Solas had left, he had felt his loss as keenly as he did Aisling’s and then, later, Neria’s. Regretted the pain he caused just as deeply. In the Fade, he watched as the boy grew into a kind, thoughtful young man, with a spirit much like his mother’s. Ren did not shy away from the denizens of the Fade (Curiosity was particularly attached to him and was often seen in his company if they weren’t entertaining Neria) but engaged with them as well. It was the same in the waking world, if Solas’s agents were to be believed. In their reports, which Solas had started to think were filled with such details for some ulterior motive, they would mention how mature Ren was for his age. How kind and thoughtful he could be.

Solas would have been proud to call him his son, if Ren and Aisling would have let him have that honor.

Yes, he had a duty to his people and a duty to every modern Elf in Thedas. Still, he could not deny that he had a duty to his children as well and, of course, their mother.

Which, Solas had to remind himself, was why he was here. To warn them.

That, and to see them one last time.

“Inquisitor.” He said, voice gruff. “You look… well.”

That was when he heard the growling. From behind Aisling leapt a large mabari, it’s coat a bluish silver hue in the evening light. The war hound put itself between Solas and the Inquisitor, fangs bared and growling warningly. Solas stood his ground, staring directly into the mabari’s eyes in challenge, his own figurative hackles raised. The mabari, to its credit, merely flinched but did not back down from what it now realized was no mere man.

“Sathan, Fenan,” Aisling said, grabbing the dog by its massive collar. It was so large she had to use both hands. “Atish dur!”

The mabari, Fenan, stopped growling at once, though he seemed reluctant to retreat entirely.

“Is ju teldin nuem,” she promised, rubbing the dog’s neck. Satisfied, the great beast trotted off, choosing to sit by the door where he continued to watch Solas like a hawk.

“I’m…” Aisling began, “I’m s-sorry. He isn’t n-n-no-normally like this…”

Solas noticed her stammer, which was usually worse when she was excited or tense. Or frightened. He hoped that it wasn’t the latter.

“When did you get a mabari?” Solas asked, desperately trying to keep his voice casual.

“He was a gift for Neria. Cullen’s mabari had puppies, and he let her and Ren p-pick one each.”

“A fine gift. I have heard that there is no better a companion than a mabari.”

“He and Neria are normally attached at the hip, but he wouldn’t leave my side this evening. He must have sensed s-something was off, and unlike Ren’s mabari, Fenan can be stubborn.

“…Ah.”

“Indeed.”

“Inq-“ he began but stopped himself. They were beyond titles now. “Aisling. Thank you for agreeing to meet with me.”

Aisling nodded curtly.

“P-p-pl-ple-“ she gave a frustrated sigh, shoulders slumping as her mouth refused to form the words. She tried again. “P-please sit,” she said, gesturing to one of the chairs in front of the fireplace before sitting down in the one opposite it. Solas sat down, perhaps a bit reluctantly. He felt a sudden onslaught of nervousness overcome him, being in her presence again after so long.

“You said that you needed to speak with me?” Aisling asked.

Solas took in a deep breath. Exhaled.

“I will be bringing down the Veil soon,” he said. The silence that followed nearly made him wince.

Solas watched as Aisling’s expression went from shocked to furious to exhausted in mere seconds before she turned and stared into the fire, face unreadable once more.

“Aisling, I-“

“When?” she asked, cutting him off.

 Solas sighed.

“Less than a year,” he said, voice barely above a whisper.

Possibly sooner, he thought, if the Evunaris keep chipping away at their prison.

He could feel Aisling’s penetrating gaze on him now, but he could not bring himself to look her in the eye. When he finally worked up the courage to lift his head, he saw Aisling with her chin resting in her hand, her real hand, as she stared pensively into the fireplace.

They sat there in silence, the only noises being the sound of the waves being carried through the open window and the crackling of the fireplace before them.

“Neria will be turning twelve this year,” Aisling intoned, almost casually, before fixing Solas with a penetrating stare, “will… will she even live to see it? What about Ren?”

Solas felt as if the rug had been pulled out from underneath him.

“That is…” he swallowed hard. “That is why I wished to speak with you. I am doing my utmost to minimize the damage bringing down the Veil will cause,” he explained, his words tumbling out of him faster and faster as he went on. “And while I believe I am close to a solution that I believe will benefit the most amount of people in the long run-“

Aisling stared at him slack jawed and in disbelief. She looked at Solas as if he had sprouted a second head.

“-I cannot guarantee Ren or Neria’s safety, unless…

“…Unless what, Solas?” Aisling asked, the apprehension clear in her voice.

“…Unless the three of you go into hiding. I have a few locations, safe houses where I believe the three of you can wade out the worst of what is to come.”

The silence that followed then was nearly deafening. It was deadly quiet; no noise seemed to pierce through whatever spell befell the two of them, not the fire dancing in the fireplace or the waves outside of the window, or even the whining of the mabari still at Aisling’s door.

Aisling stood up from her chair, slowly, as if possessed.

“What?” she asked, her voice colder than ice. Her tone cut right to Solas’s core, and he winced. Aisling then began to pace erratically, back and forth in front of the fireplace like a caged animal.

“Aisling,” he pleaded as he watched her pace, “if you never believe another word I say, please believe this: I promise that I will do everything in my power to keep the three of you safe.”

Aisling stopped her pacing to swing around and face him.

“Everything, except stopping this madness!” She exclaimed, throwing her arms up in frustration.

“Do you think I take joy in this?” Solas snapped. “Do you think I want to bring destruction upon the people of this world?”

“So you c-claim, and yet you still continue with a plan to do just that!”

Solas wanted to scream. Why couldn’t Aisling see? Why couldn’t she understand?

“What I do,” he said through clenched teeth, “I do for the betterment of the People. By bringing down the Veil, the lives of Ren and Neria, and Elven children across Thedas would be improved!”

“YOU DON’T KNOW THAT, SOLAS!” Aisling yelled. “BY BRINGING DOWN THE VEIL YOU CAN JUST AS EASILY GET THEM KILLED!”

Something deep inside Solas, something that he kept carefully buried away for eons, snapped. He leaped from his chair as if burned.

“I HAVE ALREADY KILLED THEM!” he yelled back. “AS I HAVE ALREADY KILLED YOU AND EVERY OTHER ELF IN THEDAS!”

Solas’s ears began to ring, and his legs felt like jelly. Then they gave out completely, and he fell to his knees before the former Inquisitor.

“Do you not see?” He cried, pleadingly, silently begging her to understand. “By creating the Veil, I have already condemned you, condemned both of our children, to death. I have destroyed…”

Solas felt himself trail off, unable to finish his sentence as he struggled to breathe. He felt the guilt of thousands upon thousands of deaths wrap around his neck like a hangman’s noose. Elf or spirit- at this point it hardly mattered. He could feel the weight of all the races of Thedas, every living soul that ever was and would ever be, as they cried out for justice. He could feel their spectral hands grab at the noose around his neck and pull and pull and pull…

“…I have destroyed everything.” He choked out.

Aisling knelt beside him. She took him into her arms and held him tightly, rubbing circles into his back in a soothing gesture. He buried his face into her shoulder, heedless of the snot and the tears he was surely getting all over her as he wept like he hadn’t wept in an age, thousands of years' worth of grief pouring out of him in waves that would have pulled him under were it not for Aisling’s anchoring presence.

“Ar lath ma,” he wept, “ma vhenan, ma ghi’lal elen. Ar lath ma sul bellanaris, i ir abelas.” 

“Tel abelas,” Aisling muttered, her own tears spilling down her cheeks and dripping onto the back of Solas’s head while he continued to sob onto her shoulder.

“I am trapped. Trapped on a path I no longer wish to walk.”

“You need not walk it alone, Solas, if you must walk it at all,” she grabbed him by the face, stared at him with wide, pleading eyes. “P-p-pl-please ma lath, if this is something you must do, then let us find a way to do it together. Safely.”

“I…”

For one brief, shining moment, Solas considered it. Aisling had done the impossible before. But this…

No. He couldn’t do that. Not to her. Never to her.

“I cannot,” he said, fervently shaking his head, “I cannot do that to you, Aisling. Please do not ask that of me.”

Aisling let go of him and sat there on the floor in front of her fireplace, looking as broken and defeated as Solas had ever seen her. He hated that he was the cause of it. Solas needed to leave… Leave before he broke her heart even further. With great effort, he hauled himself to his feet.

“I will send word,” he said, his voice hoarse and hallow, “when I have found a suitable location to keep you and the children safe from the worst of the fallout. I am sorry, Aisling.”

Slowly, Solas made his way towards the door, each step a struggle. He hadn’t made it far, however, when he heard Aisling call out for him.

“Solas, wait,” she said. “P-please don’t leave. Not yet.”

He shut his eyes tightly, knowing that, deep down, he should leave before he did any more damage. However, the part of him that was more impulsive and reckless, that was more wolf than man and that kissed her back in the Fade over a decade ago, demanded that he stay. Stay and bask in her presence for as long as he could before he would no longer have the chance to.

Solas turned around and sat back down in the chair. In the end, he didn’t stand a chance.

The silence that followed was painful. Aisling seemed just as surprised that he had chosen to stay as he was.

“How is Ren?” He asked, eventually wanting to keep things civil while also learning as much about the children he abandoned as he could while he could.

“Tall,” she said, “taller than me now,” Aisling smiled softly and stared into the distance, looking at something only she could see. “Ren’s been doing well here in Rivain, though he misses Skyhold t-terribly. He’s been learning magic from myself and Dorian, when he has the time. He’s picking it up fast; I’m proud of him. Dorian even has Ren help him with his research sometimes.”

Solas wanted to ask about what they were researching, but he kept it to himself. It wasn’t his business.

“Ren has also taken quite a liking to p-painting over the last few years. He wants to try a fresco at some point…”

“A fresco?” Solas asked, feeling his heart skip a beat.

“A fresco,” she said with a nod and a knowing smile. “He’s been mostly sticking to canvas, but if he is serious about it, and I believe he is, I can think of a few places here he c-could try it out on.”

“I…” Solas faltered, unsure if he was about to cross some sort of boundary, “…I could send for the type of paint he would need. Brushes as well.”

His fears were unfounded, however. Aisling beamed, clearly happy with the idea.

“He would like that,” she said.

The room delved into awkward silence once more.

“Have you b-been well?” She asked.

Solas couldn’t help the huff that escaped him.

“Honestly?”

“Honestly.”

“I have been… well enough.”

Aisling quirked an eyebrow, doubt written plainly on her face before she burst into raucous laughter.

“Sorry,” she said, wiping her eyes, “it’s just… Neria does the exact same thing, you know? When she’s been c-caught in a lie and doesn’t want to answer. She evades the question.”

“I was not evading the question.”

“Neria says the exact same thing.”

He snorted. Then frowned.

“Neria lies?” he asked, not at all liking the implications, whispers of traitor, harellen, echoing in his skull. Aisling gave him a sympathetic look.

“She’s eleven, Solas.” She said, fondness in her voice. Whether it was for him or for Neria, Solas could not say. “She’s eleven and she has a t-tendency to sneak live animals into her room when she thinks no one is watching.”  

“…live animals?”

“Oh yes… You should have seen the snake brood she incubated.”

“Does she have any preference when it comes to animals?” Solas asked, eager for any scrap of information he could gather on his little girl. His da’vhenan.

“Well, she loves wolves,” said Aisling. Then, with a roll of her eyes, she added, “No idea where that came from…”

“A coincidence, I’m sure,” said Solas, unable to stop himself from grinning.

“Of course,” Aisling replied, a small smirk on her face. “She also loves reptiles. And that one, truly, is a mystery to me.”

“She likes… reptiles?”

“Yes. Lizards, snakes, turtles. We see them all the time here in Rivain. She and Ren will spend hours down by the shore looking for them.”

“And does she find any?”

“Usually. She’ll often sketch the ones she finds in her notebook and show them to me. She’s gotten quite g-g-g-goo…” Aisling let out another frustrated sigh, “…she draws very well, too. You would be proud.”

“I am,” Solas declared. “Proud of her, that is. Proud of both of them… even though I know I have no right to be.”

Hastily, he swiped the moisture from his eyes. If Aisling noticed, she didn’t comment on it, merely stared at him sadly. There was so much he had missed because of his duties. First words and steps. Their first sparks of magic. He should have been there for all of it. Should have been there to watch them learn and grow and…

You should be there for them now, a voice in his head hissed.

And he wanted to. Oh, how he wanted to… To give up on his wretched goals and go hunt for lizards on the beach with Neria and teach Ren how to paint frescos.

He felt himself spiraling once more, dangling on the edge of some dark precipice, when Aisling gently touched his hand, bringing him back to himself with a start.

“I-“ he began, “Forgive me, I-“

“Solas, would you like to learn more about her? Ren as well?” Aisling asked kindly.

It was not often that Solas found himself at a loss for words. This time, however, he couldn’t seem to be able to get any past the lump firmly lodged in his throat. He could only nod enthusiastically.

And that was how, hours later, the two of them ended up on the rug in front of Aisling’s fireplace. She had regaled him with as many stories of Neria and Ren as she could. Many of them were tiny, inconsequential things, but to Solas, each little tidbit of information was as precious to him as any jewel.

He laughed right along with Aisling as she told him of the time Neria brought a toad she found to her Aunt Vivienne’s fancy dinner party. Both Neria and Ren had tried to catch it, but the frog was apparently evasive and had landed right on the lap of one of the Orlesian noblemen. He was also surprised, pleasantly so, to find out that Vivienne had apparently found it just as hilarious and had a habit of serving that particular Orlesian frog legs whenever she hosted him.

He marveled at the tale of how the children discovered their respective magic; Ren apparently summoned wisps of light one night when he woke up to find his room frighteningly dark, only to excitedly show off his new trick to his mother the very next morning. Neria and Solas couldn’t help the bark of laughter that came from him when he heard the tale, he had accidentally summoned fire. Apparently, her Uncle Dorian had been showing the little girl magic tricks involving small flames, only for Neria to decide she wanted to try it herself. It was a surprise to them both when she summoned her own flames, and luckily, the only damage done was to Dorian’s mustache... And, perhaps, his pride.

He felt a spike of righteous fury when he learned that the Iron Bull had apparently promised both children to take them dragon hunting and only calmed once Aisling told him that she herself had promised the Qunari that she would turn the Iron Bull into the Iron Steer if he ever dared pull such a stunt. Solas couldn’t help but laugh a little at that. Apparently, the subject had never been brought up since.

So caught up in absorbing as much information about the children as he could, he didn’t notice how the two of them were slowly inching their way closer and closer to one another until they had both subconsciously reached for the other’s hand, entwining their fingers together like that was where they belonged. Solas was the first to notice, looking down at his long, slender hand as it engulfed her much smaller one. Aisling followed his gaze and blushed furiously.

She didn’t, Solas noticed, remove her hand.

“You still haven’t answered my question, Solas,” she said, giving him a pointed look, “Don’t think I haven’t noticed.”

“Ah. She is privy to my ways, it seems…”

Solas thought of how best to answer her. The simple answer was that he was painfully lonely, scared, and unsure. But he didn’t want to tell her that. Not after everything else, he laid at her feet. He had already burdened her with enough worries for one night.

 He didn’t want to tell her of the nightmares that came more and more frequently as of late. Of the Evunaris breaking free from their prison and hunting him down, hunting Aisling and the children down. Images of their corpses haunted his dreams, and many nights, he would wake up with a scream, so panicked, so unwilling to return to the Fade that was once his home, that he would simply stare at the ceiling until dawn came.

 Nor did it feel right to complain about how isolated he felt. How his home, the Lighthouse, that was once a place of refuge, had become something of a prison. How alone he felt as he ate after sharing so many meals with the Inquisition… With his friends... With her… How he had simply started skipping meals, just so he wouldn’t have to eat alone at his long table, meant for more than one single, solitary old fool.

He couldn’t tell her those things. Those were his burdens to bear. Problems of his own doing that he could do nothing but endure alone. He could, however, give her one simple truth.

“I’ve missed you,” he said, finally. “Terribly, in fact.”

At that, Aisling leaned forward, her large green eyes sparkling in the firelight. She was very close to him now, close enough that he could have easily run his thumb across her cheek or tuck a lock of bright red hair behind her ear. For a moment, Solas could have sworn he could smell the scent of wool and amber.

“Truly?” she asked.

“Truly,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “Truly, madly, and deeply.”

“Sweet talker,” she replied, and before he knew what was happening, Aisling grabbed him by the collar and kissed him passionately. Then she pulled back, her eyelashes fluttering, and Solas knew if she had asked him at that very moment to give up his mission, he would have done it. Laid down his arms and throw himself at her mercy.

(Months later, trapped in a prison of his own making, Solas would replay this scene in his head over and over again, silently wishing Aisling had asked him and that he wasn’t such a coward so he could have made that decision himself.)

“Stay with me tonight,” Aisling said in a breathless voice that sent shivers down Solas’s spine. “Just for tonight. Please…”

“Vhenan,” he growled.

“Let us pretend. Just for tonight…”

“We shouldn’t,” Solas said even as he went in for a kiss of his own, his hands finding their favorite spot right above the small of her back.

It was a token resistance, and he knew it.

They barely made it off the rug before they were laughing and tossing aside their clothes (or, in Solas’s case, armor) without a care in the world. Aisling yelped, then laughed brightly as Solas scooped her up, bridal style, and carried her off to her bed, laying her down as gently as he could. He crawled over top of her, and as he did, he lavished her body with kisses, worshiping her.

“Ar lath ma,” he whispered with each kiss pressed against her skin. “Ar lath ma. Ar lath ma. Ar lath ma.”

Finally, as he slid inside of her, his body fitting with hers perfectly as if it had been made that way, he did as Aisling bid him to do and allowed himself to pretend. Pretend that Fen’harel and all his terrible duties were dead and buried with the rest of the Elvhen empire and that he was allowed to be simply Solas, the wandering Elven apostate.

In his mind’s eye, he saw it. The life this Solas led.

Solas, with his clever daughter and thoughtful stepson, whom he would be teaching everything he knew. Magic, the Fade, the Elvhen language, painting, chess… it didn’t matter what. If they were interested, he would teach them. If he didn’t know, then he would learn with them.

And, of course, he would help Neria hunt for lizards by the beach and teach Ren how to bind paint to plaster.

He imagined that they would have more brothers and sisters… as many as Aisling was willing to give him. Multiple sets of tiny, pointed ears surrounded by bright red hair. Multiple little voices all calling him “Papae.”

Solas’s nights would be spent much like this one, with Aisling in his arms. He would card his fingers through her long, red hair. Whisper words of endearment against her skin as they made love, slowly, languidly, and without the baggage from before. There would be no secrets, no duties or guilt to come between them, and he would be free to love the woman who became his heart as she deserved to be loved.

Truly, madly, and deeply.

And each morning, he would wake up to soft, freckled skin against his own and to a smile that was brighter than any sun. Some mornings, he imagined, would start later than others, as he would struggle to keep his hands off her… but eventually, they would make their way down to a long table meant to sit their entire family. Breakfasts would be chaotic, but there would be light and laughter and so, so much love…

He wanted it all so badly.

In the real world, Solas buried his face into Aisling’s shoulder as he continued to thrust desperately into her. He tried not to think about how this might be the last time he would ever see her in person. He tried not to think about how he would be gone before she woke up, how she would reach out for him only to find a cold space where he once lay.

“Var lath vir suledin,” Aisling whispered in his ear as if she sensed his growing despair. She probably did.

Var lath vir suledin. It was a promise that she had made before, and it was a promise that she would keep until the bitter end.

Var lath vir suledin. He didn’t know how. But, at least for tonight anyway, he could pretend that it could.

With that, Solas closed his eyes and allowed himself, just this once, to worry neither about the past nor the future and to let himself simply be lost in the sensation of loving this incredible woman and being loved in turn.

[bloodiedbiotic]

Blair looks so fucking good in Veilguard.

[pastelroyce]

I actually had a fun idea back before the game came out to keep the whole "protagonists are related" verse I made years ago by making Rook my Inquisitor's older sister. Not done with the game tho so I gotta see how it all pans out.

[sunsetsoft]

📩 "keep your eyes on me. just focus on me. we're going to be okay." @breathandshadow 🔆 emotionally charged – accepting!

ellie did as he was told, eyes previously focused on the disarray behind the necromancer coming to gaze upon him. her mind was racing, chest heaving with heavy breathing. we're going to be okay. did he believe that, or were they just words to calm her down?

ellie remembered a conversation with emmrich, not too long ago, where she admitted that death didn't scare her, and he had confessed the opposite to be true for him. their proximity to death, though incredibly different in their practices, made the hypotheticals fun to discuss, but in this moment, in the face of being thrust into leadership, elinor realised there was perhaps more to her answer. his own death didn't scare him, but being responsible for others'? which was why she needed to know if emmrich's consolations were earnest.

soft hands took emmrich's forearms, steadying herself and considering whether to let the vulnerability show as varris' words of advice echoed in his mind.

"do you mean that? we're going to be okay?" he kept doing as he was told though, eyes unwavering in their gaze, hoping their shared connection to the mourn watch was enough to communicate what the mage was unable to find words to express.

[dimensionalspades]

Kalais de Riva. If he puts his tits away for more than 2 seconds he suffocates

[oakthcrn]

𝑻𝑯𝑹𝑶𝑼𝑮𝑯 𝑯𝑬𝑹 𝑩𝑳𝑨𝑫𝑬𝑺 𝑫𝑰𝑫 𝑯𝑰𝒁𝑬𝑵𝑭𝑹𝑨𝑬 𝑺𝑰𝑵𝑮. 

A Dragon Age verse loved and crafted by Jackie

Read More under the cut.

Lark remembered her earliest days within the great city state of Starkhaven. Her parents were elves that lived in the alienage. She remembered playing there until her family decided to leave Starkhaven for Tevinter. What she later learned was that her father got a job with the Shadow Dragons. They moved to Minrathous when Lark was eight years old. It was a whole new world for Lark, but she didn’t mind, she made friends with a human boy named Caelum Tsukino. They were inseparable, and his parents were also in the Shadow Dragons. They were taught together, ate together, and went everywhere together. Lark learned how to wield blades and bows while Caelum honed his magic. Life was good, and Lark enjoyed the times where she traveled with her father to Treviso to treat with the Crows. She often played with the crows her age and made friends. 

For several years this was how it was. Life was hard but good. Lark officially became a Dragon after the loss of her father, who was killed on a mission, and her mother died from illness a year later. All she had left was Caelum, whom she had fallen deeply in love with. She protected him at all costs, and he loved her in return. Lark took the nickname “ Rook ” given to her by Varric. 

After getting involved with a difficult duty of tracking Venatori, Lark and Caelum became engaged, and after the mission, they would be married. However, during a scouting mission, they were ambushed by Venatori, and taken captive. Both of them endured torture, and pain for several days. Lark tried to escape, and was severely wounded. She couldn’t protect Caelum as they took him away for a strange ritual. Lark was angry, so much so it attracted a powerful demon known as Retribution, once a spirit of Protection. . He promised her that if he allowed him to possess her, then she would get her revenge. Lark accepted the terms, and when the demon, who introduced himself as Hizenfrae, thrummed with an unnatural fiery strength. She forced herself up and despite the pain in her wounds, she interrupted the ritual, and murdered the venatori savagely. Through her blades did Hizenfrae sing. However, to Lark’s horror, Caelum had been drained of blood. 

She had to get to Varric, and get help, she pushed herself so far that her body eventually gave out and she fell down the shaft. Not even the demon could wake her. Fortunately, she was found by Varric and taken back to the hideout to recover. When she awoke, she confided only in Varric of what happened. Told him of Hizenfrae and made him swear not to tell another living soul. They held a funeral for Caelum, and Lark vowed she would destroy every single Venatori. Over the next two years, Lark continued her work as a Shadow Dragon, and her bond with Hizenfrae became stronger. He was strange for a demon, he didn’t take control and only made an appearance when Lark’s life was threatened. He remained dormant, except when it came to battle. He would channel his power through the blades that Lark wielded. Eventually, she joined Varric in hunting the Dreadwolf.

[feraldames]

when I'm going to have so many muses and just *facepalm*

But honestly, I really want to add 3 new characters. 2 are OCs

My Succubus Durge, Rhea

Mel Medarda - Arcane

Lilya Laidar - my new dragon age Rook (will give her a Bg3 verse)

I mean, look at them! how could I not write them <3

[rooksgambits]

“just because you are soft doesn't mean you are not a force. honey and wildfire are both the colour gold.”

ind. sel. priv. ROOK of dragon age: the veilguard ft. verses in bg3, fallout, mad max, and more!

[woodcries]

DRAGON AGE STARTER CALL. like for a starter set in the dragon age universe, from either dragon age based characters or characters with crossover verses ( kinsey, cherche, dorothea, sophie hatter, ella of frell, more ) specifying muses gets you priority. (note: while i have added my rook and neve to my muse list, i'll be avoiding most veilgu.ard content unless specifically requested. any posts will be tagged with veilgua.rd spoi.lers as well)

[lavampira]

OC MASTERLIST

last update: 02 september 2024

ORIGINAL

.

INTERACTIVE FICTION

ANGEL PAVON

alias: operative vesper

age: 28

identity: he/him, bisexual

appearance: 6’2

specialization: infiltration

romance: nash, evie thierry (ex, au), seb ariti (au) [belongs to consulaaris]

verse: project hadea + original

BENJAMIN “BENJI” FINCH

alias: sunset bird resident

age: 23

identity: he/him, bisexual

appearance: 5’10

occupation: guitarist + freelance artist

romance: cove holden, rowan hill (au) [belongs to consulaaris]

verse: our life + original

DAVINA VIRAC

alias: the painted phoenix

age: 25

identity: she/her, lesbian

appearance: 6’, phoenix mythosi

weapon: double-bladed scythe

romance: syfyn javall (ex), amilia von clamile

verse: the exile

LEOVIC “VIC” RANE

alias: omen, commander-legate

age: 29

identity: he/him, gay

appearance: 6’4, hunter-raised mage

specialization: circle-trained diviner

romance: red antiqua (ex), trouble alder

verse: shepherds of haven

LINDEN “LUX” KENNEDY

alias: lead vocalist of saint reverie

age: 26

identity: they/them, bisexual

appearance: 5’11

occupation: alternative rock singer

romance: seven lawless (ex), orion quinn

verse: infamous

RIVER LOVELL

alias: rivlaughluv

age: 27

identity: they/them, bisexual

appearance: 5’10

occupation: private lab technician

romance: olivia santos (au)

verse: blooming panic + original

TABITHA ABRAMS

alias: the preacher

age: 26

identity: she/they, lesbian

appearance: 5’7

occupation: vampire-hunting swindler

romance: celina sokolova

verse: larkin

VERONICA SCARLET

alias: the wayward scarlet

age: 25

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’8

occupation: biology grad student

romance: avery belle

verse: scarlet hollow

YANA ROMANUS SEVILLA

alias: white company mercenary

age: 29

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’4

occupation: mercenary + latin translator

romance: hadrian

verse: the golden rose

TTRPGS

ELAITH NATHAIR

alias: the druid

age: 32

identity: she/her, lesbian

appearance: 5’7, half sun elf

class: circle of spores druid

romance: none

verse: dungeons & dragons

LON LAURIER

alias: the investigator

age: 33

identity: he/him, gay

appearance: 6’3

occupation: wwi veteran + museum curator

romance: ethan ripley

verse: call of cthulhu

DC COMICS

OLIVIA SANTOS

alias: the lawyer

age: 27

identity: she/her, demiromantic bi

appearance: 5’5

occupation: defense attorney

romance: dick grayson, river lovell (au)

DRAGON AGE

GABRIEL COUSLAND

alias: hero of ferelden, hound of highever

age: 23 in 9:30 dragon

identity: he/him, bisexual

appearance: 5’10

class: duelist + shadow rogue

romance: leliana

ALTHEA “THEA” HAWKE

alias: champion of kirkwall

age: 25 in 9:30 dragon

identity: she/her, lesbian

appearance: 6’

class: reaver warrior

romance: merrill

ARACELI “CELI” LAVELLAN

alias: the inquisitor, first to the keeper

age: 30 in 9:41 dragon

identity: she/they, bisexual

appearance: 5’5

class: knight-enchanter mage

romance: TBD

TBD

alias: rook

age: # in 9:52 dragon

identity: they/them, bisexual

appearance: TBD

class: reaper warrior + mourn watch

romance: davrin

THE ELDER SCROLLS

ARISE VALEN

alias: the vestige

age: 33 in 2E 583

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’9, dunmer

class: dragonknight

romance: fennorian

TORA THE DOVAHKIIN

alias: the last dragonborn

age: 29 in 4E 201

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’8, nord

class: conjuration warrior

romance: farkas

FALLOUT

MARISOL REYES

alias: courier six

age: 29 in 2281

identity: she/her, lesbian

appearance: 5’6

skills: speech, guns, repair

romance: none

FINAL FANTASY XIV

D’ALIA LIVEQ

alias: warrior of light

age: 28 in ARR

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’4, seeker miqo’te

job: summoner, dark knight, dancer

romance: minfilia warde (ex), sidurgu orl

MASS EFFECT

MALENA SHEPARD

alias: the commander

age: 29 in 2183

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’10

class: vanguard

romance: kaidan alenko

SONORA “SONI” RYDER

alias: the pathfinder

age: 22 in 2819

identity: she/her, lesbian

appearance: 5’8

class: sentinel

romance: vetra nyx

PATHFINDER

MERITHIA DE CHARON

alias: queen of the stolen lands

age: 29

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’7, aasimar

class: celestial line sorcerer

romance: tristian

RESIDENT EVIL

EVELINE “EVIE” THIERRY

alias: the detective

age: 28

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’1

occupation: private investigator

romance: jill valentine, angel pavon (ex, au)

STAR WARS - KOTOR

SHIVA AMHI

alias: the jedi exile

age: 31 in 298 BTC

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’5, mirialan

class: consular + master

romance: atton rand

VANNA PHY

alias: revan

age: 33 in 303 BTC

identity: they/she, bisexual

appearance: 5’9, human

class: scout + sentinel

romance: malak (ex), canderous ordo

STAR WARS - SWTOR

ANA MAITE VICARI

alias: the wrath

age: 21 in 10 ATC

identity: she/her, lesbian

appearance: 5’3, human

class: marauder + shadow

romance: jaesa willsaam

ANDAN VICARI

alias: cipher six, sith intelligence commander

age: 24 in 10 ATC

identity: he/him, demiromantic bi

appearance: 5’11, human

class: operative + gunslinger

romance: rysandor riel [belongs to consulaaris]

CADRIEN TIRAI

alias: lord tirai, claw of the empire

age: 19 in 12 ATC

identity: he/him, gay

appearance: 6’1, miraluka

class: juggernaut + sage

romance: minaiph tirai [belongs to hythlodaes]

EDELIE LOK CADERA

alias: champion of the great hunt

age: 18 in 10 ATC

identity: she/her, bi demisexual

appearance: 5’2, human

class: mercenary + powertech

romance: torian cadera

JORANI RHA

alias: captain of the fortune’s favour

age: 24 in 10 ATC

identity: she/her, lesbian

appearance: 5’7, twi’lek

class: scoundrel + mercenary

romance: blaire myrrho [belongs to consulaaris]

KAIZEN “KAI” AMHI

alias: jedi battlemaster, the outlander

age: 20 in 10 ATC

identity: he/him, gay

appearance: 6’2, mirialan

class: guardian + sage

romance: theron shan

MITTH’ALIA’MIURANI “THALIA”

alias: CEDF infiltrator/biochemist

age: 25 in 10 ATC

identity: she/her, bi demisexual

appearance: 5’9, chiss

class: sniper + operative

romance: saganu

MITTH’ASTON “THASTON”

alias: cipher nine

age: 23 in 10 ATC

identity: they/them, bisexual

appearance: 6’1, chiss

class: sniper + powertech

romance: kaliyo djannis (ex), hunter (ex)

SARAJAH RIZAS

alias: jedi barsen’thor

age: 23 in 10 ATC

identity: she/her, bi demisexual

appearance: 6’, cathar

class: shadow

romance: felix iresso

VIN KHARU

alias: havoc squad commander

age: 25 in 10 ATC

identity: he/him, bisexual

appearance: 5’8, nautolan

class: vanguard + mercenary

romance: elara dorne

WYLAN ORIAS

alias: ex-padawan mechanic

age: 20 in 20 ATC

identity: he/him, bi asexual

appearance: 6’4, echani

class: shadow + guardian

romance: jase bralor

ZOYAH KALLIG

alias: darth occlus

age: 26 in 10 ATC

identity: she/they, poly bisexual

appearance: 5’, rattataki

class: assassin + sorcerer

romance: andronikos revel

VAMPIRE THE MASQUERADE

INES DELAROSA

alias: the fledgling

age: 25 at embrace in 2004

identity: she/her, bisexual

appearance: 5’2

clan: toreador

occupation: metal singer

romance: ash rivers

THOMAS REAUX

alias: the sire

age: 28 at embrace in 1919, final death in 2004

identity: he/him, bisexual

appearance: 6’2

clan: toreador

occupation: jazz pianist

romance: none

[oathwilled]

while i think in Veilguard I'm going to use Paerin as my Rook in my actual playthrough, I'm probably going to stick with him being a companion/non-PC in my ongoing Dragon Age verse. Partially because I want to keep his background and name as-is, partly because it'll likely make RP easier!

[jasper-the-menace]

My OCs

Absinthe Rakdoson (Magic: The Gathering)

Amphitrite the Primarina (Pokemon)

Aqua the Pokemon Trainer (Pokemon)

Areia Camael (The Elder Scrolls)

Arenmir the Altmer (The Elder Scrolls)

Astropo (Dragon Ball)

Bear Sianamne (Dragon Ball/Dungeons and Dragons)

Beatrice O'mally (complicated)

Benoe the Ranger (complicated)

Blue the East Gastrodon (Pokemon)

Boyne Alexander Mason (complicated)

Chariot the Pawniard (Pokemon)

Coconut the Alolan Exeggutor (Pokemon)

Dana the Flareon (Pokemon)

Danae of Theros (Magic: The Gathering)

Dennari Areia (Legends of Chima/Magic: The Gathering)

Elizabeth Bardsly (Magic: The Gathering)

Emily Zephyras (Legends of Chima/Magic: The Gathering)

Emylyn Aghadraki (complicated)

Faust Sianamne (Dragon Ball/Dungeons and Dragons)

Flam (Dragon Ball)

Gideon Makarov-Walker (complicated)

Grainne the Griffin (Legends of Chima)

Grealt Fuque (Dragon Ball)

Himo and Hami Sianamne (Dragon Ball/Dungeons and Dragons)

Jaren Rakdoson and Ritter Rakdoson (Magic: The Gathering) * Jaren Trevelyan (Dragon Age verse) * Ritter Trevelyan (Dragon Age verse)

Jinjer the Saiyan (Dragon Ball)

Keklur of Order (complicated)

King the Bisharp (Pokemon)

Koda Hayashi (Magic: The Gathering)

Doctor Landrik the Lion (LEGO Legends of Chima)

Lena Maise of New Capenna (Magic: The Gathering)

Queen Liberta the Lion (LEGO Legends of Chima)

Lohiarm Makarov (complicated)

Loki the Skydancer (Flight Rising)

King Lupercalia the Lion (LEGO Legends of Chima)

Mathias Markov (Magic: The Gathering)

Menea of Theros (Magic: The Gathering) * Menea Surana (Dragon Age verse)

Miriam Amnesti (Magic: The Gathering)

Nen of Amonkhet (Magic: The Gathering)

Nerizana Sianamne (Dragon Ball/Dungeons and Dragons)

Nicole Mosscheek (Dungeons and Dragons)

Okadi'dro the Khajiit (The Elder Scrolls)

Onyx Zephyras (Legends of Chima/Magic: The Gathering)

Ovlan Roya (Magic: The Gathering)

Pawn the Pawniard (Pokemon)

Petha Mazat of Ravnica (Magic: The Gathering)

Quick-Sign of Kamigawa (Magic: The Gathering) * Quisi Hawke (Dragon Age verse)

Rasa Sianamne (Dragon Ball/Dungeons and Dragons)

Reyna Elderfrond (Dragon Ball/Dungeons and Dragons)

Rook the Shiny Pawniard (Pokemon)

Rune the Tarot Reader (all of them)

Sakai Tetsuya (Magic: The Gathering)

Scrat of Eberron (Magic: The Gathering/Dungeons and Dragons)

Sharpa Fuque (Dragon Ball) * Sharpa Hawke (Dragon Age verse)

Spike the Crobat (Pokemon)

Stabs-Your-Chest the Khajiit (The Elder Scrolls)

Standard the Pawniard (Pokemon)

Stem Sianamne (Dragon Ball/Dungeons and Dragons) * Stem Mahariel (Dragon Age verse)

Tabitha Markov-O'mally (complicated)

Temp (Dragon Ball) * Temp Adaar (Dragon Age verse)

Torgen of the Trees (Dungeons and Dragons)

Tower the Pawniard (Pokemon)

Trey of Theros (Magic: The Gathering)

Vasca of Zendikar (Magic: The Gathering)

[fals3nd]

private, mostly friends only multimuse by bee (26, est, she/they). most muses with siblings are mains with my sisters versions, @homebehind and @omegahs

rules.

dragon age esyllt trevelyan - inquisitor. greer cousland - companion cousland sibling calpernia - (former?) venatori leader ( bg3 verse )

star wars bodhi rook - rogue one rey - canon divergent/heavily headcanon based you forty quinn - s2 guinevere beck - s1, emphasis on canon divergent survivor au

the hunger games katniss everdeen

lord of the rings eowyn

little women jo march - book & pbs 2017 miniseries insp beth march - book & pbs 2017 miniseries insp

d&d ocs meredith connar - light cleric, savior of elturel, kind of a heretic rn don't worry about it prince rin adveliss reaegis of the celestial kingdom of praezar - babiest child of a fucked up astral elf monarchy, archfey patron warlock eleine etene - sci-fi flavored great old one warlock. ex-con who maybe downloaded a malicious ai into her cybernetic limbs and now is arguing with it while it controls her arm and leg. it's real fun.

good omens anathema device - book & show influences

doctor who the captain - timelord oc, connected to nan's oc the artificer downton abbey edith crawley we have always lived in the castle constance blackwood

the haunting of hill house (netflix) luke crain

nancy drew ( games based ) nancy drew

swan lake ( ballet ) the swan queen / odette

baldur's gate 3 odile / the dark urge

pacific rim piper reed, jaeger pilot, connected to @denouemente's oc jude warren

greek mythos helen of troy

we are th.e t.igers riley williams dead boy detectives (netflix based) edwin paine jenny green

the dragon slippers creel

[usagimen]

Things I think of a lot when it comes to Sayuri (Dragon Age version)

Running to the Inquisitor && taking her jacket off to secure their warmth after the events of Haven. She follows Cullen through the snow only to shield the Inquisitor from the elements, visibly distraught.

Her introduction in DAI is during a party where she shows off parlor tricks with a champagne glass, using a dagger to cut the cork && glass. It’s unbelievably decadent, fancy, all the while toasting to the Inquisitions pursuits.

Prefers masc clothing when roaming Skyhold, loose tunics tucked haphazardly into breeches, leather gloves, her hair is always loosely braided or in romantic waves. She is never seen without her mask but has a thousand for functionality && occasion. It is considered taboo for her to be without a face, even if one was to remove her mask, they would find a thick layer of cosmetics underneath to shield her natural state.

Speaking of such a thing, it happens during the events of Haven where she quickly shields her face but one can see the gruesome scar where later on she will reveal there is nothing in this life to fear. Not the Blight, not the Empire, Mages, Tevintor, except her - she is a ruthless hunter && spiteful when all she loves is threatened.

Her color scheme is pastel pink, ivory, and gold in this verse. In Trespasser she is seen in a beautiful white dress giving alms to the children of Val Royaux during the holidays.

Her faith is an incredible backbone to her story, Sayuri knows the collections of the Chant of Light. One can hear her often praying during the times she is allowed to relax, though she is faithful && revered as Andraste’s Dove, she often makes crude jokes in such manners. If the Inquisitor is Dalish, she does not hold the belief that the Maker has sent them as their herald, instead, the Inquisitor is the brightness that wards the dark && perhaps, this is something greater. Her love is devotion, even in the platonic sense, she comes to believe that her zealous faith blinds her to the truth that stands before her - this group of misfits, political outcast, they quickly become home && she upholds them in her heart deeply.

Loves horseback riding, if one choose to venture with her out, she will speak of her family on the outskirts && their humble origins. 

Veilguard introduces her once more where she recounts story of such days, she will confess to Rook, perhaps other than the innocence of helping her father create beautiful dresses for nobility; it was when she was the happiest. Though, as a diplomat of Orlais, she will uphold to help Rook regardless. Her tongue has dulled over time, granting her a sense of wisdom, gentleness && introspective nature. Though one thing is important to recognize; she doesn’t wear a full mask, only half.

[fadecasted]

I haven't finished Dragon Age Veilguard yet, but when I do this blog will be active. Possibly might have my main blog"@ DA verse hosted here; Clint Barton might be made a grey warden

A look at my returning oc muses;

Nyra Hawke ; "purple/red" rogue hawke (I miss my moody lesbian)

Cassius Hawke ; "blue/purple" warrior hawke (soft plant daddy vibes)

Maxwell ; an ex templar archer, turned inquisitor, he's exhausted y'all

Nikolas Pentaghast ; a mourn watch mage, cousin of cassandra pentaghast, son of vestalus pentaghast

Possible muses after datv finished

Neve Gallus

Isabela

A Shadow Dragon Rook

Bellara

Tarquin

Possibly later last

Varric

Solas

Anders