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#█▒ ❝ strongest of all ( champions ).
sage-nebula · 5 months
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Pokémon Horizons Ep 7 || Pokémon: The Strongest Mega Evolution
I'm finally catching up on the Horizons anime and something Liko said sounded very familiar . . . 👀
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apollos-boyfriend · 2 years
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schlarklez will forever be one of the funniest ever ships to me btw. at face value it looks like it would be the world’s most insane crack ship, but it’s not because of the sheer amount of times schlatt has flirted with jordan and the fact that jordan started a whole cryptocurrency business just to rival schlatt. there’s genuinely a good amount of history between them, not to mention the fact that they’re both often painted as tubbo’s father figures, it just makes so much sense. but also the mental image of captain jordan maron sparklez and jonathan jebediah schlatt in a romantic relationship sounds like the most insane bullshit ever
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battlelaine · 3 months
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Arceus gave her depression & dependency issues because if they hadn't she'd have bested them in hand to hand combat at age 15.
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cheemken · 8 months
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KNIGHT-
I re-read some of the Villain Iris AU posts and yeah, Drayton would be DEVASTATED when watching the live stream
Like imagine he’s at home with either his parents or he’s with Drayden at the moment, just trying to stay warm from the ice Kyurem and Iris had placed across the region. He has no idea what to do or what to think, the figure who had terrorized the region, thrown Ghetsis to his death, ruined the ecosystem, made living in Unova actual hell, just revealed themself to be his older sister
And she looks different from how she presents herself in front of him, she looks tired, insane. And when he’s around she looks normal, stressed maybe, but always normal like she wasn’t trying to worry him
Imagine if after the livestream was over, Iris went to find Drayton to invite him to live in Team Plasmas castle with her. He was one of the few people who actually cared for her and looked up to her like she was a hero
And she was his hero
But she just can’t let Drayton live in Opelucid City where there’s barely any food left for the survivors, where it’s freezing cold both outside and inside every building. She wanted her adoring brother to be somewhere safe when she continued to force the region into submission. She wasn’t going to hurt one of the people who cared for her
Last thing but I would think that one of Iris’ goals would be to murder both Hilda and Hilbert. They might’ve been her friends but that was before the voices of Unova got to her, now all she sees is competition she was to be rid off
If the twins are gone, then no one can stop Kyurem from fusing with both Reshiram and Zekrom
And everyone will see Iris as the Hero she always was. As the God she will be
Also I am trying to make this coherent as possible but I’ve only gotten 5 hours of sleep last night and it’s almost 2:00 am rn.
Dude right😭😭 but ough this is giving me villain Diantha vibes now like the og one w her just wanting to keep Augustine safe lmfaooo
Oh this is fucked up man this is so fucked up imagine how that must've went tho, how she's there trying to convince him to stay with her, I imagine it's like,, set after her fight w Hilda, like the one where Hilda broke her nose cause she punched her, imagine that. Iris telling the Shadow Triad to get Drayton for her, ofc, she wants to keep her brother safe too, he always adored her, always looked up to her, saw her as a hero even before she got Kyurem, why would she abandon him the same way everyone else abandoned her?
When the Shadow Triad returned, Drayton in hand, he was trembling as he staggered back, reaching out for his Archaludon's pokeball, only for it to not be there, seeing his pokemon at the hands of the Shadow Triad. And finally he sees Iris standing before him, Kyurem looming behind her, casting a shadow over them, making Iris' crimson eyes glow an ominous light. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, as Iris was kneeling before him, the Shadow Triad disappearing. And ofc he expected the worst, Iris was covered in blood, the blood from her nose smeared all over her mouth, her jaw, even on her gloves. Removing her gloves, she reaches out to him, making him flinch as he felt her hand on his head, ruffling his hair.
Looking up at her again, he sees her smile, but god it wasn't the same one he's so used to seeing, this one feels twisted, sordid, it didn't feel right, her fangs were bared, as she said, "I'm glad you're safe, Drayton." And god he fucking hates it absolutely hates it how the one looking so adoringly at him isn't the same sister who used to tell him stories when they were younger, who gave him piggyback rides, who always believed he can achieve so many things despite his laziness; no, this wasn't his sister, this was a monster mimicking his sister, and god did he hate it, "I don't know what I'd do if anything happens to you."
Imagine her pulling him up to a hug tho, he can smell the blood on her, it made his stomach churn. Then she's there smiling again, god he doesn't wanna look at her anymore. "I can't just let you live here with grandpa, you know how he is, plus..." She looks down from the Frigate, looking at the state Opelucid is in, "do you really wanna live in this frozen death trap?" She then turns to him, "in the castle, you can have all the food you want, it's warm there too," she said, pulling him to her side. "You don't have to worry about going to school, not like you cared about it in the first place, right?" She laughed at that, Drayton just wants to run away from her
But can you imagine tho Drayton finally confronting her abt shit, why she became like that, she was a great Champion, she was his hero, everyone loved her. Then suddenly Iris' demeanour changed, she was almost glaring at him, staring right through him, almost piercing. Her voice was cold, bitter cold, "don't be naive, Drayton." She spat out, "do you honestly think they'd tell you they hate me right at your face?" Taking a step forward, he took a step back, "do you really think they'd tell you how much they hate me?" He took another step back, "do you really think that I don't hear about the way they wanted Hilbert to be the Champion, how much they looked down on me, how much they wanted me to lose?" His back had hit the edge of the Frigate, "do you really think I don't know how much this region hates me?"
Drayton tried to tell her that not everyone hates her, they shouldn't, she's doing everything for this region, then she just laughs as she shakes her head, pulling him to a hug again. God he hates the smell of blood. "You should know better, Drayton." Her voice was but a whisper, "you should know, our family looked down on you too," her grip turned tight, "I heard everything they said about you. How you can never be at their level. Can never be a Dragon Master." And she's there stroking his hair, "even when you became Champion of the academy, they didn't care." Then she pulled away, looking at him like how she looked back then, so softly, like the sister he once knew, "but I cared. Grandpa may never be proud of you, but I am."
And just hcmxbxn y'know Iris just low-key manipulating him, snapping her fingers and suddenly the Shadow Triad showed up again, handing over Drayton's pokemon, as she tells them to lead Drayton to the quarters, to let him rest for a bit, to give him food, as Iris herself will plan her next attack. Ofc, the twins being her next target. She already has Zekrom with her, already fused with Kyurem. Now she only needs Reshiram, and soon she'll have the Original Dragon by her side, submitting to her commands.
Soon, she'll show them just who the God of Fate truly is.
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iamfandom00 · 2 years
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i forget the actors name but larry looks looks like the guy that plays the oncologist in house and the main character in dead poets society but blue
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pixelatedquarter · 1 year
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every once in a while i need to remind people that amidst the vampire action, the b movie cheese and the cunt bilvy was serving, it's often overlooked that andy's long-scarved katana-wielding weeb ass with the tit-length bedazzled vest was also wearing a fucking tail.
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If I say this enough it will speak it into existence: being a Pokémon master does not have to mean being the strongest battler. I’m sure being a strong battler comes with the territory but there are still regions Ash hasn’t been to and Pokémon he hasn’t met. He’s going to keep traveling until he’s seen them all.
#listen I am just nervous#I love ash so much I don’t want this win to be the reason I don’t get to go on adventures with him anymore#actually I would kill for an older-geared story where they let Ash age and take on high stakes battling#but only if it was written well#mostly I am content to watch ash battle his way through new regions#and his new team would be entirely new Pokémon except hos broken Pikachu so#even if ash and Pikachu are the strongest battlers alive give ash an entirely new young team that doesn’t buy into it yet#make him work around more temperamental Pokémon#or let him take a job working for the leagues as a special third party who they send in to handle the big stuff#while simultaneously mentoring a newbie#like maybe ash is on legendary patrol kind of like his current gif with professor cerise just higher stakes all the time#or he’s a junior champion to Lance who manages home base things and send ash off to handle things overseas#like he’s sent tonpaldea specifically because of the time shenanigan rumors a few years after being world champion#maybe he battles regularly in the PWC on the side but his only challengers are gym leaders#elite four and champion level trailers and battle facility masters#ash battled well but he is still so young#and Leon really did have control of the field until Pikachu came out#if you put ash in a higher stakes league on the regular you could still see exciting battles throughout a new story#he doesn’t have to do a gym run#but he could still battle gym leaders on the reg#just maybe not in the leagues themselves#idk I feel like there are so many ways to keep ash around from here#he still has so much to learn about battling#and having 4 uses of gimmicks to Leon’s two definitely helped him#though Leon asked for that tbh so I wouldn’t say it’s unfair#he’s just a kid#let him keep working towards his dream#his journeys goal has been reached but that doesn’t mean his overall dreams are achieved#anipoke spoilers#anipoke
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blkkizzat · 3 months
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❝DIGIMON—BUT MAKING U CUM IS MY REAL HOBBY!❞
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⏯ OTAKU!GOJO X BIMBO!READER
⏭ summary: your best friend gojo is a hopeless otaku virgin with zero rizz that's still obsessed with digimon—despite being a grown ass man. you're a slut who despite her best whoring efforts—can't cum. you'll take his v-card and he'll fix your broken pussy, deal? college au.
⏭ cw: virgin!satoru, gentle sex then rough sex , spanking (ass & pussy), slight sugar daddy/baby dynamic, coercion, dubcon, ecchi/pervy/freak nasty satoru, apprehensive bimbo!reader scared to nut, reader is also a bit of a tsundere brat but this isn't brat taming per se, oral fixation, toe licking, riding, prone bone, missionary, pussy eating, deep-throating, forced gagging, fingering, squirting, edging, olfactophilia, hand-job, protected & unprotected sex, bdsm references, masturbation, bit of somnophilia, pet names: Bunny (reader is called that in lieu of y/n), suggestions of geto x reader, mentions of satosugu and shokohime.
⏭ a/n: in my crack smut bag again cause this white haired demon wont let me rest until i write this nasty shit. fr tho this fic 13.3k and literally 10k of it is Gojo fucking you six ways to sunday. fyi this is the same y/n from nerd!geto but this is a different version of that AU where suguru is the one who has rizz and satoru is the nerd. y'all better read this or i'll never write gojo again istg lmfao. also shoutout to @halosdiary for beta reading and telling me it was good enough to post lol.
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“FUCK YEAH, LET’S GO!!! I ALONE AM THE CHAMPION OF THE DIGITAL WORLD!!!”
Startled by Gojo’s sudden outburst—you nearly rolled off the bed. 
Thankfully Suguru is sitting next to you and caught you before you fell off completely. 
Fully energized by his win Gojo sprang up from his elaborate PC setup, bouncing around the room in celebration. Fist-pumping the air he couldn’t contain his excitement after winning the Tokyo Regional Qualifiers for the Digimon Online TCG. 
“Guys, hey guys! See! I told you I’d win! I’m the strongest! The digidestined!”
You and Suguru exchanged exasperated glances before side-eyeing the hell out of Gojo.
This went on for a good 10 minutes so you had since returned to mindlessly scrolling TikTok, not wanting to encourage your grown-ass-almost-22-years-old-best-friend’s excitement over a children’s game.
“You sure showed those middle schoolers, Toru.”
Suguru quips with a smile. He’s clearly being sarcastic but Gojo is unfazed—nothing could damper his mood.
“Damn straight I did!”
Both you and Suguru have to chuckle, rolling your eyes at his childish enthusiasm. 
Despite the shared sentiment of annoyance over your best friend’s hobbies, you both were just happy to have Gojo back again. Two long years had passed since his parents made him travel the world on a rotation program, tasked with visiting the various Six-Vision Industries offices he would one day inherit. 
Being the nerdy genius he was, Gojo stacked a mass of university level credits in high school. So even with missing the first two years of college he’d still be joining you as a third year at your university come fall. 
After being apart for so long it was refreshing to hang out again and kicking it at Gojo’s mansion had been a daily occurrence since the start of the summer. Although things had definitely changed in the two years Gojo had been away there was one thing that certainly hadn’t.
Gojo was still a fucking huge otaku nerd. 
You’d thought his time spent in the business world would have matured him. However, being abroad, away from his friends and spending all day around the ‘stinky old fogeys in suits’ as he called them, only made him retreat further into otakudom. 
That much was evident as his collection of posters, figures and manga had somehow only seemed to grow even with him away. 
“Alright, while I just would love to stick around and hear more about you destroying the dreams of 12 year olds Toru—beach girl just texted me, gotta bounce!”
Suguru tries to leave but Toru clings onto him practically spider monkeying himself onto his back in an effort to get him to stay. 
“Sugu! Don’t leave! We’ve already been apart from each other for too long~~”
Sighing, Suguru attempts to pry his incorrigible bestie off of him.
“Satoru, you just spent the last 5 hours playing Digimon acting like me and Bunny weren’t even here. I’m sure if you go back to playing you won't even miss me.”
Gojo continues to pout as he whines for Suguru to stay.
“But I miss you already Sugu!”
Gojo presses his cheek against Suguru’s as Suguru’s eyebrow begins to twitch.
“I know! Invite your date here! Our chef is 10 times better than any restaurant you’d go to and you know we have an infinity pool grotto and onsen!
While the offer was tempting as any potential date would be thoroughly wowed by the decadent splendor that was the Gojo Family Residence—Suguru would also thoroughly cuck himself once his date was given the grand tour. 
Particularly the stop which included Gojo’s anime figure and otaku memorabilia rooms. 
While a good number of them were harmlessly nerdy shonen or slightly ecchi isekai figures—the rest? Well the rest contained every kind of freak nasty hentai figure you could think of—shibari, futanari and even the classic La Blue Girl tentacle dioramas—it was like a horny museum. 
Although at this point it should be considered a horny mausoleum as no woman who walked in would be walking out still in the mood—it was surely a place where horny went to die.
“Uh yeah, sure next time Toru….”
Suguru reaches back to pat Gojo on the head reassuringly. 
Lying as he was more than certain there wouldn’t be a next time. There wasn’t even going to be dinner—this was purely a hookup situation. 
“...but she’s already waiting for me outside my place—gotta run!”
Realizing Gojo still wasn’t letting go, Suguru sighs realizing this would require him utilizing his Judo training. 
In one swift movement, Suguru manages to shoulder-wheel Gojo and toss him onto the other side of his massive bed. The bed rebounds as he lands, slightly lifting you off your belly but you still are more interested in your phone. 
This isn’t the first time Suguru has Judo thrown Gojo off of him (likely wouldn’t be the last either).
Saying quick goodbyes before Gojo could recover, Suguru manages to slip away.
“Traitor!!! So much for bros before hoes!”
Utterly dejected, Gojo crawls up next to you on his massive bed.
“At least I still have you here Bunny.”
“Uh, not to pile on but you know I’m only here until Shoko and Utahime text me they are ready to go to the mall, right? I’m in dire need of a new handbag!”
Now clinging on to you Gojo throws another small tantrum as the weight of half his sinewy body presses into your back, his lean muscular arms wrapping around your shoulders.
“Not you too, Bunny puhleeease!”
You’ve known each other since you were in diapers so it wasn’t odd for you, him or Suguru to be found giving the others platonic cuddles like this—often all together too. The both of them were always so much bigger than you so you often enjoyed the comfort and security of always being the filling in the cuddle sandwich.
Gojo rests his chin on your shoulder watching as you continue scrolling TikTok. You sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes before his irritatingly hyperactive nature gets the best of him, and he starts poking around your phone to click on other videos that weren’t the 'mystery and makeup' ones you were watching.
“Toru, you know you could get a lot of your own hoes to hang out with if you weren’t such a huge otaku nerd…”
You had to swat Gojo’s hand away again as he tries to click on another prank video and he rolls off of you with a frustrated sigh. 
“...you’re almost as good looking as Suguru…”
Muttering the last part of that under your breath. Arguably Gojo’s features were just as if not more striking than Suguru’s. 
He was too hot himself for all of it to go to waste for being such a big dork.
“I’m sure Sugu would be happy to teach you ‘the way of the fuckboy’ if you asked Toru—that is if you’d actually go out clubbing like a normal 21 year old.”
“Why would I do that though? My house is 100 times better than a club!” 
Touché. 
While no one in your friend group was what someone would consider poor, Gojo’s wealth paled in comparison to anyone else’s and that went without saying. He’d had everything—if not more—than even the nicest tokyo club had. This was all thanks to his parents as socialites in their own right, often entertaining businessmen, dignitaries or foreign representatives with their ultra-exclusive parties.
“Besides, it wouldn't work—”
Gojo continued to pout.
“—Suguru would just get all the hoes anyway.” 
Easily able to walk up to even the most standoffish looking women, Suguru would have them reduced to bashful school girls in under 5 minutes. The women were always willing to hand over their numbers or drop any immediate plans to hang out with Suguru instead.
A good number of them had boyfriends already too.
Yet despite having the looks, Gojo opening his mouth ruined any advantage his lustrous blue eyes, exotic snow white hair and sharp handsome features gave him.
“Well, Suguru has a normal 21 year old’s room for starters, Toru. Not full of nerdy ass anime posters and Digimon tournament trophies.”
Gojo goes quiet. 
Driven from an early age to fill his head with knowledge of politics, technology, and international business relations, he spent the precious free time he did get with his friends or consumed by his own interests. Interests which just happened to be a bunch of otaku shit—Digimon in particular. 
It was an escape he’d cherished as a child and that didn’t change growing into adulthood either, if anything he needed it more now.
When Gojo doesn’t answer you look over to see him actually sulking for real now—face buried in a giant Agumon pillow plushie. 
What a crybaby. 
But the crybaby was one of your besties so you decided to lighten the mood and tease him a little.
“Ya know Toruuuu….you could just fuck Sugu then. Don’t think I haven’t seen y’all get a lil’ handsy during our cuddles!”
You give him a playful smirk and mime grabby hands at him.
“Oh and you haven’t? Don’t act like you wouldn’t fuck Suguru either!”
No longer appearing mopey, Gojo is up and laughing again. Mission Accomplished.
“Hey! I never said I wouldn’t but this isn’t about me, this is about you finally getting some play!”
You snap back but you’re blushing.
Like damn, who hadn’t thought about fucking Suguru though? 
“It's not the same if he makes me bottom! Plus no one thinks I can get pussy!”
Gojo grumbles, hugging his Agumon plushie to his cheek. 
You can’t help but notice how cute and baby girl he looks all pouty. 
He’d definitely get women lining up around the block of his huge ass mansion if he could at least get to the dating phase without giving out the otaku ick. 
“Because you can’t Gojo—Hoes don’t want to fuck guys who play Digimon!”
“But you’re a hoe and you like digimon too!”
Turning to look at him, you’d had half a mind to slap the shit out of Satoru but he had said it so earnestly. There was no sass nor malice behind his words. 
Besides, you were a hoe. That wasn’t something you ever denied.
You sigh. 
“Yeah I am a hoe now and I—keyword—liked Digimon. But that was back when I was a kid, Toru!”
Gojo scoffs and rolls his eyes.
“Listen, you’re my friend so m’gonna keep it a buck with you—a guy concerned with being digidestined is definitely not pussy destined, you digidork!”
You playfully hit him with the pillow you were laying on, not wanting him to start sulking again. 
Finally stimulated by something interesting Gojo wastes no time joining the pillow fight you initiated and you tussle with him on the bed until you both are exhausted and out of breath. 
Of course you come out of it victorious though. By the end you’d pinned both the pillows and Toru under you. 
Gojo however is back to pouting.
“Ugh, Bunny seriously though—I can’t go into junior year of college as a virgin!”
You smirk at his complaints as the answer is obvious.
“Throw away your figures and digimon cards then.”
“I’d rather die.”
“A virgin? At this rate you will.”
Gojo huffs in defeat as you settle comfortably on top of him this time. 
You’re about to reach for your phone again until you see a curious look flash across his face—the kind of look he always had as a kid when he thought of a hair-brain scheme that would lead to getting you all in trouble.
“Toru—what is it? And why do I have the feeling m’not gonna like it?”
You pull away cautiously, but his large hands grip your waist, stopping you and causing you to squeak in surprise.
“Hm, I dunno—was just thinkin’... why don’t you fuck me, Bunny?”
Your deadpan expression has Gojo scrambling, holding you closer in a vice grip when you try to squirm away. 
“Hey! Wait, I’m serious! Come on, Bunny! I need the experience and you always tell us about all your hookups! You have the experience—help a guy out!”
Staring at him skeptically you considered.
I mean sure, you always thought Gojo was attractive, more so since he returned this summer nearly a half a foot taller—but he was Gojo Satoru.
Your dorky, goofy, pervy otaku bestie practically since birth! 
You couldn’t just go and fuck him could you?
God, you could only imagine the taunts you’d get if word got out. Your friend group would never let you live it down! 
“Nah Toru—that would be too weird!”
“Huh, how come? You said I was almost as attractive as Suguru earlier!”
You stiffen.
Fuck, he’d heard that after all. 
“Ooo, ooo! Annnnd, you said last week you wanted a sugar daddy… Well, hi! I’m right here!”
The huge grin on his face has you frowning although more so because he was actually making some sense for once. I mean you were half-joking when you said it—well, let’s be honest not really. 
However, you mostly said it because while your family was well off enough, you still weren’t living in the lap of luxury by any means like a Gojo clan member. Unfortunately for you though, you were born with the expensive tastes of someone who was. So while you could afford a cute Chanel bag or a MCM wallet here or there, you’d set your sights on something higher—a coveted Hermes Birkin. 
Toru certainly could afford to buy you a whole truck load of them with what his family made in less than an hour. 
Nevertheless that wasn’t really the issue at hand. 
In spite of you being far from a virgin, there was actually a good reason why you wouldn’t be a good choice for Gojo to lose his v-card.
“Er, em—that’s really not the issue, Toru…” 
Trailing off you’re the one pouting now as you glance at your nails. 
“Then what? Don’t tell me our lil’ Bun Bun is shy now? Over lil’ ol’ me?”
Gojo teases you by sticking out his tongue—chuckling when you snap your head up to glare at him.
“You wish…” 
You grumble, chewing your lip now and debating whether or not to tell him the truth while Gojo looks at you with wide and glassy puppy eyes. Shaking your head you come to the conclusion you could trust him with your secret. 
He was the virgin otaku after all—he’s the one who should be embarrassed here!
“It’s just that…I–I can’t cum.”
Gojo just blinks at you. 
Clearly confused with metaphorical question marks surrounding his head as that's definitely not the answer he was expecting.
“I’ve slept with plenty of guys before but I never had an orgasm. I don't even really get close—I mean, sure, it feels good, I guess—mostly just a little weird. I heard some people just can’t and maybe that's me.”
You shrug, a bit nervous to look Gojo in the eye as you thought he may tease you further about this but was lost in contemplation. Almost as if he was seriously trying to do the biological math around what you’d just told him.  
After about a minute more he finally asks—
“—Does Suguru know?”
A simple question, unloaded in tone as Gojo is genuinely curious but it leaves you flustered nonetheless. 
“What?! Are you crazy?! Why would I tell him?!”
“Just figured if anyone could then—”
“—Hell no, Toru! Besides, what if he does? I’m not trying to be reduced to a fuckboy’s pick me if he ends up being the only man alive who can give me an orgasm!”
Sure Suguru was hot as fuck—as was a lot of your other fuckboy friends (Toji and Sukuna)—but you definitely didn’t want to end up like the dickmatized girls that would follow them around and literally box each other in the streets over some cock. 
You weren’t much of a fighter anyway and your face was far too cute to be getting scratched up.
Pussy should be put on a pedestal, not the other way around. You’d continue to be orgasmless before it came to that.
“Mm, but Shoko and Utahime know?”
You’re blushing more than ever this time.
“Um, yeah—T-They said once I realized all men were worthless to call them and they’d give me multiple of them.”
Gojo snorted at that but he was now convinced you both could help each other. 
“So we have no other options—then it's settled!”
In one fluid motion Gojo snatches away the pillows from between you and swaps positions—now with you on the bottom.
“Huh–wait—Toru!?”
Gojo groans.
“Come on, Bunny! I want pussy, you want to cum on top of getting that Bikram bag—
“—Birkin bag.” 
You corrected him.
“Yeah that one! So let’s help each other out, eh?  PULHEEEASEEE—Just the tip?”
You weren’t at all convinced that Gojo—whose sexual knowledge came purely from JAV, hentai and onaholes—could make you cum.
But then again sure, fuck it, why not?
You were getting bored waiting for Shoko to call you anyway and if Toru was willing to come off a Birkin for a lil’ pussy, you might as well fuck him. 
None of the other guys you had fucked even came close to making sex this worth it. Frankly this would be worth it even if you didn’t actually cum.  
“Fiiiine Toru, let’s have sex—”
“FUCK YEAH!”
“—BUT we’re laying down some ground rules!”
Sitting up with a straight back, Gojo obediently awaited your orders.
“Anything you want Bunny, name 'em go’on!”
Gojo’s overenthusiasm was like a puppy and you were sure if he had a tail it would be thumping on the bed like crazy now. 
You wanted to crack a smile but you know from prior experience that if you give men an inch they will take the whole goddamn mile—and Gojo of all people was no exception—so you are firm as you sit up to look in his eyes and lay down the law.
 “First—like you said, just the tip.”
Gojo started to protest but the raise of your eyebrows had him changing his tune immediately.
“Got it! Got it! Just the tip would be amazing Bunny, what else?”
He chided himself and you continued.
“And secondly, just because you bros have no loyalty, it’s still ‘chicks before dicks’ over here. You better get your nut quick cause I’m still leaving to go purse shopping when Shoko and Utahime call me.”
Gojo waves you off with that rule. 
“Psh, we should have plenty of time, it's almost 6pm! They’ve probably been too busy bumping their own purses together to go shopping with you for one. You haven’t heard from either of them in hours!”
Fair point—wildly out of pocket, but fair. 
Still. 
“Bumping Purses!? Really, Toru?”
“You know I’m not lying—but that’s it then, right Bunny?”
Not waiting, Gojo throws his shirt off and starts fumbling with the ties on his sweats before you stop him.
“Nah, Toru, hold your horses! One more rule!”
Freezing mid-action, Gojo's hands are shaking as he expectantly gazes at you, waiting for the last condition before you give him the green light.
“Finally, third—and most fucking importanly—if you make any, and I mean even just ONE—otaku reference, especially Digimon while you’re inside me I’ll snap your lil’ digidick off, understood?”
Gojo swallowed. 
Hard terms to live with but something he would be willing to abide by for pussy.
“Yes ma’am! Got it! Just the tip, you will ditch me for the purse bumpers and no Digimon!”
Gojo repeats your rules matter-of-factly. 
You roll your eyes but are satisfied enough he understood and you wave him off in the direction of your bag.
“Good. Now, be a good boy and go get a rubber out of my purse.” 
Bolting over to your purse Gojo grabs a pack of condoms and is back on the bed in an instant.
Reality sinking in on what you were about to do and who you were about to do it with, you suddenly become hyper aware, appraising Gojo. 
You note just how much in the two years since high school he’s grown. Still a bit lanky in areas but overall he filled out more for sure and his muscles were much more defined rippling underneath his skin as he eagerly clambered over you. Gojo still possessed the same piercing sky blue eyes that lit up a room but they looked all too predatorily hungry now that he was hovering over you. 
You swallow.
You’d feel almost completely out of control of the situation if it wasn’t also for the bundle of nervous energy radiating off of Gojo—his hands spasming like he might bust his pants the moment he touches you.
You try to maintain your composure, but your jaw drops and your eyes widen in shock when he finally pushes his sweats and boxers down in one swift motion.
Gojo was fucking huge!
“Toru—what the actual fuck?!”
Third leg was a massive understatement. 
I mean you didn’t think he’d be small—you’d been around him enough in boxers, sweats, pjs, etc growing up—but you didn’t expect this. 
He was definitely a grower and Christ did he just fucking grow!
Gojo looked puzzled until he followed your wide eyed gawking down to his lower half. 
Heh. 
“Am I the biggest you’ve seen, Bunny?”
Growing prideful Gojo pokes at you a bit and your ogling only grows more incredulous. 
You didn't know if he was the girthiest but certainly the longest by far. He’d actually puncture a lung if he stuck that whole monstrous thing in you!
It would literally have to be just the tip and you are thanking God right now that he’d already agreed to those terms. That would be much too uncomfortable to cum from and you are beginning to question how the pornstars manage. This wasn’t a JAV but Gojo, if his company ever went belly up, certainly had a promising career on OnlyFans ahead of him.
Gojo’s chest puffed up ten times more from your staring as he slipped the condom on (which only fit two-thirds of the way down). 
“O-Ok, Bunny now you!”
His cock throbbed more violently the longer you looked at him. The anticipation is contagious to say the least and you can't help but feel your chest warm at his eagerness. 
Gojo wants to get the attention off of him and you smile at him knowingly.
“You mean you don’t want to take my clothes off yourself?”
The thought never occurred to Gojo but he dumbly nodded. Your yelps echo in the room as his massive hands are on your hips faster than lighting pulling you towards him. 
The motion causes your tits to jiggle, the soft mounds moving freely beneath your spaghetti strapped halter and Gojo berates himself on how he only now is noticing you weren’t wearing a bra all this time. 
Gojo’s mouth goes dry at your nipples, already peaked and poking through the thin fabric. 
Your nipples pucker further when the crisp air of the A/C hits them after Gojo pulls your top overhead and you arch up to assist, not realizing you presented yourself to him like a treat to a dog. 
“T-Toru!!!!”
Gojo wraps his strong sturdy arms fully around your body. Pressing his face deep into your chest as his warm wet lips latch onto a nipple. His mouth now suctioned to you, Gojo swirls and flicks his tongue around the hardened bud. Gojo moans around your flesh, pleasantly surprised at how addicting the sweet salty taste of your skin is. 
If Gojo wasn’t sure he had an oral fixation before he surely knows now. Zoning out everything else except for the sloppy sounds of him worshiping your breast, he relishes the contrasting textures of his rough tongue suckling the soft skin of your swelling bud. 
Gojo surely would have been latched onto you for hours and you are only able to pry his head away when he releases your nipple with a wet pop to take a breath.
“TORU!!!”
You’re panting and red faced as you yank his head back. 
But Gojo is a man solely focused—tongue hanging out off his mouth captivated by how cutely your areola puffed as it glistened with his spit and fighting overwhelming desire to get the other one in a similar state.
“Huh–Bunny, b-baby—you taste so good n’ your tiddies are so nice—so fuh-kin’ soft.”
Gojo’s tongue is hanging out of his mouth drooling as he attempts to dive back into your chest. you feel his heavy cock on your thigh as his hips begin to rut against you. 
This was too much!
“Stop Toru! You’re being too rough, they are sensitive! Besides, times’ ticking! Remember I have no problem leaving you blue balled if Shoko or Utahime call me!” 
You do your best to give him a disapproving look as you blush.
“Awe but you seemed like you were liking it, you were whining loud enough.”
“Shut up n’just get on with it!”
“Yes ma’am~~”
Enjoying your breasts so much Gojo almost forgot he hadn’t even seen your pretty pussy yet. 
Making quick work of your shorts, Gojo manages to pull them down just over your core but is stunned once again as he burns the image of the skin-melding fabric of the mesh hot pink g-string covering your cunt. The thin satiny straps dug into your supple hips amplifying your curvaceous form.
Fucking slutty as hell!  
Rivaling that of even his most favorite and most scandalous hentai figures. 
This was so much better, so much more lewd as the clingy fabric struggles to cover the fat of your plump pussy lips—not like the transparency of them left much to the imagination. 
God help him, he just wants to tear them off with his teeth and open mouth swan-dive into your dewy lil’cunt—-pushing his tongue deep into your peachy core tongue fucking orgasm after orgasm out of you until he drowned in your milky nectar—but he has to restrain himself.
You probably wouldn’t like that too much given your reaction earlier and he’d die if you’d happen to just call the whole thing off.
Mouth drying and hands twitching—Gojo is trying so hard to be a good boy and contain his more perverted instincts.
“Earth to Toru! Y-You good?”
Gojo looked like a tightly wound coil ready to pop in every sense of the word and you hated that his nervousness was making you nervous too. 
So on edge you almost jumped once his eyes snapped up to meet yours.
“G-Great, Bunny…j-just fine.” 
Gojo’s voice falters, becoming more pitchy and you giggle. As much as Gojo wants to look at your pussy as he peels the flimsy moist fabric off of them he couldn’t do that at this moment—he would actually bust his pants.
Instead, Gojo leans in to kiss you, but you block him. He ends up kissing your palm instead.
“Toruuu… that be too weird, we’re friends remember?”
“Yeah friends who are fucking, Bunny! You mean you won’t let my tongue in your mouth but you’re letting my dick inside your pussy?!”
You knew it sounded nonsensical even before he said it back to you. But your heart was pounding so loudly in your ears you could barely hear him anyway.
You didn’t know what you were scared of this time? 
You had let all your other previous hookups makeout with you but Gojo was different. 
This felt entirely different.
You didn’t know why, you just knew it was and you were apprehensive of the unfamiliar emotions he was stirring in you and this wasn’t supposed to be anything more than an arrangement between friends.
“Don’t you need to warm up tho Bunny? Obviously m’no pro at this—but even I know a little bit more foreplay is usually needed?”
Your heart beats louder at his concern but you push that aside trying to focus on your breaths. 
Satoru should have been the easiest lay but for a reason that alludes—you were coming undone before him.
“Shut up Toru and just fuck me! The foreplay stuff doesn't matter, it won't make a difference anyway, m’not gonna cum! Also you’re big af so grab your lube. We're gonna need lots of it!”
Toru pouts but follows your commands without fuss. 
Although he’s anxious to get his dick wet he also is still thinking of how he can hold up his end of the bargain other than a stupid purse. 
You said he didn’t need to but he wanted to. 
The thought of finally losing his v-card excited him but there was something that made his cock throb harder at being the first man to give you an orgasm. 
But you don’t want him to touch you beyond what was absolutely necessary, so how was he going to accomplish that exactly?  
Gojo was a genius and had the IQ score to prove it, he’d be able to solve the problem once he was inside you, right? 
Turning back to face you after retrieving the lube from his nightstand, Toru has to grab the base of his cock this time to keep from prematurely coming in the latex that was already starting to thicken with his precum.
There you were laid out like a slut—panties pulled to the side—fingering yourself a bit to loosen up, having reconsidered his suggestion of foreplay when the twitching on your thigh reminded you of how big he actually was.
“OH SHI—”
You notice his jaw hanging open, utterly entranced as his eyes follow the motions. 
You knew you should be letting him do this to get the experience but honestly there was no sense in setting Gojo up for failure—delivering a significant blow to his ego when he inevitably couldn’t make you cum. You didn’t want to damage him even more if he felt it was his fault your pussy was apparently broken, you having tensed up completely every time a guy had tried before.
But you can’t deny you are getting some pleasure—if only through your own amusement—as you grab his cock and pump the lube he poured down his latex covered shaft, still fingering yourself—much to Gojo’s delight and wonder of seeing an actual real pussy up close. 
Gojo sucks in air and groans pitifully as your hand spreads the cool gel over his length which only intensifies his ache to be inside of you. 
“C’mere, Toru…”
You beckon sweetly, guiding him forward with your back against the pillows, you tease the crown of his tip through your folds preparing him for missionary. 
Gojo nearly bites a chunk out of his lip when his thick cockhead finally catches over your slicked entrance and you’re left wincing.
“T-Toru, e-easy—o-ok? Not too deep...”
A breathy confirmation shudders out of Gojo as he’s easing himself into your warm tightening cunt. The stretch is immediate which mentally confirms for you he is also the girthiest you’ve ever had as well. 
Your heels dig into his hips to brace yourself while he hovers over you, arms shaking.
“FUUUUUHHHH—”
Even with the rubber on, Gojo still thinks he might melt from how warm and tight you are—so much better than even his onahole with the custom grip and heating features. 
Screwing his eyes shut, Gojo has to count backwards from a million, recite Japan’s national anthem, list the GDPs of the top 10 wealthiest countries—anything—or he will cum too soon or worse, crack and drive his hips until he’s all the way to the hilt from the way your dangerous lil’ pussy is sucking him in.
God, it felt like your slutty cunt had a mind of its own calling for him to push in a lil’ deeper, greedily begging for him to go a lil’ further but Gojo resists. 
Sweat beads on his brow from the exerted effort of sheer willpower to keep his promise to you.
To Gojo’s credit, he really is doing his best, only a little less than a third but due to his length that's still a lot. 
Your eyes wander up to Gojo’s face and away from where he is wholly splitting you open, lest you clench on him even tighter and you knew you needed to relax. Even if you weren't really feeling much but the overwhelming strain from the tight fit, looking at Gojo you were happy that he appeared to be in bliss at least. 
His eyes still squeezed shut, mouth hanging open and spittle flowing down his jaw Gojo was in his own world as he continuously babbled nonsense about how perfect your cunt felt around him.
Just the tip in you for all of 20 seconds and already pussy drunk from just this much. 
“B-Bunny, Oh SHHIII–B-Bunny—m’cute Bun—FAH-ACK s’gud—m’gonna cum soon UHH–pussy feels s’good—oh-oh my god!” 
Although his entire body is quaking with pleasure, the few functional brain cells that survived the fiery blaze of your sinful lil’ pussy are still thinking of you. 
Gojo tries to give some attention to your neglected lil’ clit, but a single swipe causes your leg to jerk and you promptly push his hand away again.
“N-NO! Pleaseee, m’too sensitive Toru! J-Just focus on your thrusts! Y-You’re s’close, m’can feel your cock twitching i-i-inside me...”
Gojo wants to challenge you on this—suspecting from the way your cunt felt constricting around him you felt something pleasurable then—but he’s too far gone and much too inexperienced to keep focused on anything else. 
Especially when you are so explicitly describing him fucking you. 
Grabbing his face you bring your foreheads to touch to help calm him so he’d last a bit longer. Although you still hold his face to prevent him from kissing you, he's close enough that you're sharing the same breath, now looking into each other's eyes. 
He struggles to maintain eye contact though before the magnetism of your heated core had them rolling back again.
You're still not close to cumming, yet you are beginning to enjoy the warm comforting feeling of being this full as he holds you close, his short thrusts gaining momentum. 
Sharing intimacy with someone you actually cared about for once is really nice and you wouldn't mind having more sex like this even if you couldn't cum. 
Thumbing over Gojo’s moist lips you coo sweet praises to him as he desperately moans around your delicate appendage. Suckling your thumb between his lips and nursing on it until he can no longer contain the heavy breaths that overpower him and fan across your face. 
Sharing the same exhaled breath is making you light headed and you mewl at the keen sensations it stirs in your pussy that has him full on gasping now. Gojo releases the whiniest moan as he falls into you, unable to support his arms any longer. 
Showering your neck with open mouth kisses as his body curls more into yours.
However it all proves far too much when Gojo faltering more in his promise, slips more than halfway into your cunt—instantly filling the latex as it balloons inside of you as you scrape your heels against his back.
SHIIIIIT! He s’big! 
Despite nearly splitting your poor pussy into two at the end though, Gojo did such a good job for his first time. 
You’d forgive him just this once though as you wrapped your arms around his head, gently petting his undercut. His heaving breaths quiet under your soothing touches, finally ceasing the stream of his spit and tears that had been pooling in your collarbone.
Staying like that for a while holding him while his heartbeat calms to match yours and his length softens inside you. You close your eyes peacefully for a few moments before you hear your phone vibrate next to you. 
It's Shoko!
Shoko’s text apologizes for the delays and offers to get dinner instead—promising to go shopping with you and Utahime tomorrow since they got held up and you make plans for dinner in two hours. 
Perfect. That gives you plenty of time to clean up and get yourself presentable. 
“Did you cum even a lil bit, Bunny?”
Oh sweet baby, if you have to ask…You think to yourself but it's not poor Toru’s fault your pussy is out of order.
“Um, no Toru baby—but you did so well! Ya know you’re actually pretty cute and considerate when you get a little pussy. I’m sure you’ll manage to make any girl you happen to get naked happy!”
Gojo counters you with a disappointed look still panting slightly as he pulls out and rolls over bringing you towards him to cuddle. Allowing him, reasoning that you don’t have to get up right this second.
Yoour back meets his chest and it’s then you notice the condom still inside you. Figures since it was much too small in the first place. Yet you couldn’t complain as it managed to do its job due to Satoru not going all the way in. Breathing out you grimace a bit as you still had to give it a pretty good tug to lodge the filled latex out of your sore cunt. 
“Goddamn Toru, you were pretty backed up huh?”
Having witnessed the entire display from over your shoulder and the sight of the light blue rubber covered in your fluids while drooping heavily with his own has Gojo’s dick stirring again as you jiggle the rubber demonstrating its fullness before tossing it into the bin beside his bed. 
Conflicted Gojo broods for a while as he hugs you to him. 
While his body felt mostly satisfied, seeing you still unsatisfied put a huge damper on his mood. 
Sure you had told him you couldn’t come—but would any girl cum without much foreplay or stimulation? 
Even the darker hentais and JAVs he’s seen had more foreplay than this!
Hmmm... 
Thinking over the experience again in his mind he had a hunch that if right could cure your lack of orgasms but needed you to let him fuck you once more to be sure. 
“So you’re gonna hit and quit just like that, Bunny?”
He teases clinging onto you again when you try to maneuver out of his embrace.
“No time for more cuddles Toru—Shoko texted, we’re getting dinner in two hours.”
“Wait! Bunny! That’s so far away—Let me go again, pleeeease!”
Gojo is determined this time to make you cum for real! And, yeah you know—your slick heat sliding up and down his cock again would be a highlight too.
“Toru–”
“—Come on bunny! We solved my problem but we haven't fixed yours, you still haven't cum yet!”
“Toru, I thought we understood we were never going to solve my problem in the first place—so don't stress! Also I know this is probably the first time a girl has said this to you and actually meant it—but it's really not you!”
Gojo puts his negotiation face on. 
You wanted to play hardball? Bet.
“I’ll give you my black card for a whole week!”
Gojo turns you around to look him in the eye so you could see how sincere he was, he really wanted to try again—he knew he could make you cum this time!
You sighed. 
You couldn't really be mad at him—in fact, it was actually the cutest thing—that he wanted to keep trying for your benefit—but you didn’t see the point when it would just lead to the same result. You don’t even need to glance down to see Gojo’s cock was just as resolute as he’s already recovered and fully bricked—length pulsing against your ass. 
Well—given his last performance you were sure he’d last all of five minutes and if you had his black card for a whole week you were about to tear the entire Hermes store up—a Birkin and a Kelly in every color!
Hell, maybe you could even get the coveted baby pink ostrich one. 
“Mmm’kay, Toru—black card for a week! No limit!”
“Yup of course! Oooh no—Wait, no rubbers and I'll let you have my new g-wagon too! I hear raw sex is sooo much better you will cum for sure then Bunny!”
Well you knew a good bargain when you heard it.
Throwing the unopened condoms to the side you laid back down.
Imported European cars are stupid expensive to get in Japan and if he was coming off a g-wagon—especially as it was a custom powder blue matte with dune colored seats and shiny platinum rims—then he could have as many two-minute pump sessions as he wanted.
He’d likely pass out from dehydration in less than twenty tops anyway.
“Okay, but same rules as before except no cumming inside Toru! I mean it! It's too much of a mess to clean up after, it’ll be dripping all night especially all that you came last time…”
The thought of your gooey tender cunt weeping his nut for hours has Gojo’s balls tightening in want of making it a reality—but he knew if all went to plan you’d be begging for it! 
First—he needed you to take a more active role this time. He saw you settled back onto the pillows and that simply wouldn’t do. 
“Um Bunny, can you be on top? I-I’m dying to see what your cute tiddies look like jiggling all crazy like in my face.”
You cover your chest, frowning in offense at his more debauched ecchi preferences but you agreed nonetheless. 
Relenting as it’d likely have him cumming sooner and then you could finally get ready to meet the girls—all in your new g-wagon, although you’d definitely have to make up a lie as to how you scammed it out of Gojo.
Gojo takes your place on the pillows, amused as now it’s his turn to beckon you forward. Steeling yourself, you embarked on your climb to mount him. Tall and lean with wisps of hair sticking to his face Gojo looked more like he belonged in a painting, unnerving you that a face only an artist could sculpt admired your body with his lustful gaze. 
He was too sexy for his own nerdy ass good like this and you failed not to whimper when his strong hands settled at your waist.
Lube in your hand you smirk, gaining some confidence back when you hear Gojo hiss as the cool gel once again spreads down his fiendish girth that pulses restlessly at your touch. The sensation is all the more agonizing without the latex barrier hindering him as your, your silky smooth palm glided over his bare cock before tugging back the sensitive foreskin covering his crown head. 
Licking your lips you almost want to bend down and taste the pre marbling like a pearlescent jewel on his pretty exposed cockhead.
He’d probably cry like a baby if you did, you mused with a grin. 
Good God girl snap out of it! 
You chastise yourself—no, you had to focus and end this quickly before you lost your mind. The idea of fucking Gojo beyond what he could buy for you started to get more appealing and you couldn’t allow that.
Readying yourself to mount him this time you realize your pussy is quivering in anticipation of the stretch—it was uncomfortable last time so—why was your body reacting this way?
Your own pussy betraying you as she seemed to yearn for the opportunity to gobble him up, taking him in with less resistance in spite of you. Flexing around the thick intrusion inside your core you shiver in feeling the curve of every vein on his girthy cock as you lowered yourself onto him.
The way your pussy flexed as a jolt of electricity ran through you scared you—a new sensation bubbling up inside, threatening to make you lose yourself in the feeling.  Must be survival instincts you rationed—your cunt scared for its life never having encountered such an acute danger like Gojo’s dick before.
The burn was pleasurable this time, sucking in sharp breaths at every slight movement of him moving inside your core. Yet Gojo is in even more bliss—from the serpentine motion of your hips cascading over his own to how your your puffy pussy lips looked so wonderfully parted, stretched open around his cock—FUCK!
How was he going to complete his plan if his brain just started turning to mush everytime your dangerously succulent cunt grinded against him.
“O–ooo shiiiiiit!”
“Y-You okay, Bunny?”
Although Gojo himself looked like he was in agony his face was reddening from how good your raw gummy walls were surging around his length.
“Hhnng, fine Toru—y’er j-just big.” 
Gravity was your natural enemy in this scenario and you took him a bit past halfway this time.
Wanting to distract you, his large hands grope your tits but you knock him away—your stomach fluttering. 
“What's wrong, this time?”
“...s’n-nothing, it’s—just put your hands on my hips, it helps me so my legs don't get tired.”
You lied.
Well your legs were quivering but more pressingly your heart started to race and you didn't know if it was because a cock like this could actually relocate your uterus to your lungs or if you’d actually started catching something similar to romantic feelings for Gojo Satoru. 
Either one was unacceptable in your book.
“Hurry up and cum, Toru!” 
However Gojo is about to say something, your phone rings.
“I-Its Utahime…”
“Don’t answer Bunny! Focus or you’re never going to cum!”
“I can multitask, Toru! Besides, on the small chance I do I know it's definitely going to take longer than the two minutes you lasted before.” 
Hushing Gojo’s protests and eyes flaring at him to be silent, you answer the call. 
“Bunny!”
“Hime!”
You greeted each other with your usual peppiness—like Gojo wasn’t 6 and a half inches deep with 2 and half more to go—give or take—inside you.
“What’s up? Oh erm, what am I doing—”
A sly and haughty smile plays on his lips and you scowl at him.
“—I’m still at Gojo’s and no—I’m not doing much at all right now! Haha—yeah. I can definitely talk, of course!”
Gojo frowns as his eyes narrow and to placate him you start half heartedly rotating your hips.
You still looked sexy as hell though. Even with less effort expended it was still a workout as shown by the sheen of perspiration glowing off your body. That delectable sight combined with the light swaying of your tiddies was more than enough for him to cum if he just focused on himself.
But he was determined not to this time, not until you had.
“See Toru? They were helping Shoko’s parents!”
You stick out your tongue and he makes a face back at you.
“Oh what?—s’nothing—Ha! Well ok! He said you were too busy bumping pussies to go to the mall with me! Psh—typical am I rite? Huh—put you on speaker? LOL O-OKAY.”
Snitch! 
Gojo mouths to you offended you’d rat him out like this as Utahime’s voice shrills through the phone.
“Satoru you loser! You have to talk about our pussies cause you could never have one of your own in a million years!”
Snorting with laughter Gojo is more than amused. 
If only they knew.
You pale signaling at him to ‘STFU’ or he could finish himself off.
“Aww, is that so Utahime? I’m so hurt.” 
The mischief in Gojo’s voice is obvious—he’s clearly mocking you.
Annoyed with him getting the upper hand and feeling sassy, you pile on—
“Exactly Hime! I mean he might get some—but a total otaku like him wouldn’t know what to do with a pussy if he even ever got in—EEP!”
A heavy handed smack comes down on your ass—hard. 
The force ripples its way into your cunt causing you to feverishly tighten as your tongue pushes a low moan out between your lips.
“Oh ho ho—what's this? You actually like getting spanked huh, Bunny? You dirty, dirty girl…” 
Gojo is whispering again before his hand once more swats at that same cheek.
The sting causes saliva to pool in the corners of your mouth. 
If looks could kill Gojo would have died a horrible death—that is if you could focus enough to even glare at him. You’re absolutely mortified—too consumed by the spanks that fiercely rained down on your reddening bottom, your pussy getting shamelessly wetter with every hit.
“AH–FAHHH—”
“Bunny! What’s happened?!”
You hear Shoko’s concerned voice this time.
“N-N-Nothing, G-Gojo’s being mean to me cause I told on him! H-He pinched me so hard Shoko!”
“Liar!”
Gojo mouths again and his demeanor turns absolutely devilish. 
Oh? So that's how you wanted to continue to play? 
You were such a brat sometimes but then again so was he and his competitive nature soared at the challenge.
“Oh did I? Like this, Bunny?”
Gojo’s  palms cup your tits roughly before he pinches them, twisting your nipples causing the slobber that collected to dribble down your chin and onto your chest.
“Shiiii—T-Toru! S-STOP YOU A-AHHH–SSHOLE!!”
The grip his thumb and forefingers have on your sensitive buds intensifies and you can barely keep the phone in your grasp as you hold it out arm extended to keep your cries from being heard. 
With only one hand free there’s no way for you to worm nor pry his hands from your tits as you are still struggling not to sink lower and choke on your own tongue from the electrifying sensations assaulting your cunt.
This couldn’t be what it was like could it? This overwhelming feeling?
You didn’t want to admit it but as tear-inducing as the sensations were—they felt real fucking good. 
Your hips began involuntary rocking as your core now craved how Gojo’s cock scraped against your walls like it was trying to carve itself even deeper inside you if you’d let your hips drop just a little bit lower. 
“Toru! Stop picking on our Bunny! Don’t make us come over there and kick your ass!”
The sweat that now runs down Gojo’s brow threatens to blur his vision but he’s locked in and focused. The phone situation being so fucking raunchy combined with the way your pussy is creaming on him (despite you trying your hardest not to feel good) has him stressed. 
Swallowing he had to try hard to keep up the act as well as please you without cumming—it would be a feat if he accomplished it to say the very least.
God, this was all so shamefully vulgar. 
Did you do this on purpose answering the phone? 
He didn’t even know this was a kink of his—or yours apparently.
But your “problem” was now clear to Gojo:
It’s not that you couldn’t cum, it’s just that you were scared to cum. 
Any real stimulation triggered your fight or flight. 
You were perfectly capable, you just needed a bit of forcefulness—however the effect of it terrified you and you bolted from it every time you had sex with someone—until now. 
Heh, there would be no more running from the nut for his little bunny rabbit.
Gojo wonders how far into his ecchi depravity he can take you.
“Your Bunny, huh?”
Gojo's eyes squinted as if he could stare down Shoko and Utahime through the phone.
You were his. 
He was the one who was going to make you cum and frankly he didn’t give a fuck anymore if Shoko or Utahime heard it—in fact he wanted them too.
Planting his feet into the bed, Gojo’s form shifts as he swiftly grips your waist simultaneously bringing you down while driving his pelvis up—pummeling his entire length into your guts. The prickly patch of groomed hair at his base tickles your poor abused lil’ clit which had been forcibly nestled into them—the result of being smashed against his pubic bone. 
“FUHCCCK—MUTHERFUHH—SHHHH–HIIIIIT!!!” 
Vision momentarily blacked out and burning with tears mixed with your running mascara, your pussy still reeling from the sheer magnitude of Gojos long girthly length now all the way sheathed and practically tearing through your womb. Your eyes are firmly lodged in the back of your head, the electrifying vibrations cause you to drop the phone entirely. Your world is spinning from experiencing your first small orgasm that only increased intensity as your efforts to escape Gojo are in vain. 
Your cervix is screaming at the probing intrusion of his bulbous tip ramming so far up into you but Gojo has you anchored to him unable to flee from his onslaught of thrusts.
If you could string together a coherent thought you would have wondered if in fact your stomach had been relocated next to your lungs as you felt so full you couldn’t breathe. 
Your pussy violently spasms around his girth, creamy fluids seeping down onto his base from your cunt sloshing around him.  Gojo grips your cheeks spreading you wider increasing the squelching noises echoing from your cunt.
Shit though, Gojo thinks your perfect pussy might actually break his dick off from how fervently you were clenching him. 
Tongue fully lolled out of your mouth, you’re grasping onto Gojo’s shoulders for stability as your saliva drips down his pectorals.
“BUNNY!! Are you still there?? What’s that noise?”
Shoko and Utahime’s calls for you go unanswered. Gojo on the other hand is grinning, albeit through gritted teeth, pleased at how his long trunk-like cock is rendering you nonverbal. 
“Hehe, you definitely came a bit that time didn’t ya—ya nasty lil’ Bunny, don’t lie.” 
“N-N-Nooo T-Toru–s’like I-I c-can’t breathe—”
“Heh, a’course you can baby Bun—that's what it feels like when you cum, even I know that.”
SMACK!
Another firm smack to your ass has your cunt quivering wildly.
You feel like the virgin in this situation now—and honestly—are you not? 
Did those other dicks really count? 
It felt like you were having sex for the first time as this was a totally different experience even from the earlier round with Gojo.
“Don’t worry though, now that I know what kinda shit you’re into—I’mma take care of that pervy lil’ princess pussy sooo good, Bunny.”
Oh god—That couldn’t be true could it? 
Spanking? Nipple twisting? Having your insides pushed up to your throat? 
You didn’t actually like this kinda freaky shit did you?
Yet your body’s reactions remain true even if your mind doesn't want to accept the cause of the fire that is burning within you. Your pussy is in raptures at the feeling of being molded into the exact shape of Gojo’s cock—veins and all.
“HELLLOOOOO BUNNY!!!!”
Absolutely pleased with himself Gojo retrieves the phone.
“Awe p-poor thing, just stubbed her toe runnin’ from me. My—SHIII–room is—FUHHH—k-kinda a m-mess—S-See? I almost tripped just now too. Isn’t that right Bunny?”
Gojo brings the phone closer and you bat it away wishing he would just hang up and spare you the humiliation. Although humiliation seemed to be your new kink as mirroring his earlier actions as you’re pathetically moaning into his skin. Gojo’s masculine scent, mingled with the salty aroma of perspiration, floods your senses, making you feel even more lightheaded, increasing the sloshing of his cock buried deep in your cunt.
The crude noises that rang from your bodies squelching and slapping against each other renders Gojo unable to keep up the charade either. Making up a quick excuse—he has to go get ice for your toe—he quickly hangs up on Shoko and Utahime whose puzzled protests of concern he couldn’t give a single fuck about anymore. 
God fucking you while on the phone with them was so fucking hot, he’d have to get you to do it again—maybe with Suguru next time, he’d probably even be into it.
“Hey B-Bunny—y-you think Shoko and Hime were naked too?”
You groan.
This fucking hentai otaku perv—you already told him that they were helping Shoko’s parents! 
You want to glare, scream, chastise, get up—but you can’t—you’re at the mercy of him ruthlessly drilling up into your cunt and can only heave out tired mewls in reply.
“Fuuuck–imma cum again soon! Do you feel the way your naughty lil’ cunt is squeezing like she wants to wring me dry, wan’t me to give it all to your pussy Bunny?”
“N-Not i-inside m’pussy, T-Toru!” 
A devious smirk appears. 
Heh, yeah he promised not inside your pussy.
Without warning Gojo rips his cock out from your sopping core and manhandles you onto your back. Thinking he will simply cum outside somewhere you're finally able to breathe again and you exhale—only to feel his monstrous length being shoved down your throat.
Your eyes shoot open. 
Greeted with the image of Gojo's heavy balls in your face, his ball hairs tickle your nose as you gag around his girth straining your throat open wide. You think if he didn’t reach your lungs through your guts he certainly would now that he’s eight and a half inches down your esophagus.
“You said i couldn’t cum in your pussy Bunny, so let’s use that pretty lil’ mouth pussy instead—sweet fuck, ya know she’s almost tighter than your actual cunt.”
Your hands fly to the outside of his thighs pawing over the sweat glossed skin as you drag your nails down them, leaving welts in an effort to get him to ease up. The potent musk of your shared lust that had dripped down his balls was now rubbing on your face assaulting your senses. 
It was fucking nasty, so gross and yet your own pussy betrayed you—burning with an ache to be filled again at the smells that stimulated your own primal hedonistic urges.
“Awe, don’t be like that. I know you like it rough, yeah? I haven’t forgotten about you either baby.”
Gojo of course at this point isn’t talking to you but your cunt.
With one hand squeezing your already constricted airway, Gojo’s other snaked its way over your body and reeling it back before delivering a mean open palmed slap to your clit. 
The sound of your soaked cunt echoed through his room and he almost came from that alone as your fluids trickled out of you faster, further soiling his expensive sheets.
“This pussy likes being spanked more than those cherry cheeks of yours huh, Bunny? I know my filthy hentai pussy does.”
You’re obviously unable to answer but the way you’re gurgling moans around his cock lets him know this is exactly what you like. Thrusting two thick fingers into your quivering core his burly appendages bullied themselves in as far as they could go. 
“You know—G-God, FUCK you’re tight—Bunny, you know I read in an h-manga how girls can squirt from a lack of air and a little bit of prodding, s’ppose—S-SHIII—t’be something in here that sends em absolutely wild.”
Fingers searching deeper it's not until Gojo pulls back to add a third that he scrapes past a firm spongy spot that has your legs buckling.
Astonished by the amazingly sexy reactions of your body—Gojo’s eyes are blown out wide over how much your clit swells, your hole twitches and your juices spurt out of you as your tears run over your cheeks to wet his balls further. Gojo doesn’t even need to thrust as your throat tightens around him like crazy with him jamming his fingers into that particular spot over and over.
Lost in your own ecstasy you’re proven wrong as contrary to your belief you thought his otaku sex-ed would be to his detriment to his skills. However it's exactly because of all of the lecherous and depraved shit he collected and consumed did he know exactly what to do to you now that got you all messed up. Eyes lodged into your skull, squirting and practically blacking out with his dick stuffed down your throat on his long dexterous fingers abusing your cunt.
“SHIIIIIIT—”
With a keen grunt Gojo cums, pumping loads of viscous fluid down your throat forcing you to gorge on his thick cum. 
“F-Fuck Bunny are you a throat goat? M-Milked me dry...”
He’s still driving his pliable fingers in and out of you, his arms are shaking from his own orgasm but he doesn’t care. Nothing on earth could stop him from replicating the beautiful sight of your pretty lil’pussy spurting out juices that run all the way down his forearm.
“…heh, looks like I can milk you too, Bunny.”
Gojo finally dislodges his dick out of your throat but still runs a hand through your pussy folds to rub soothing circles on your clit. You whimper through your coughs as you spit up some of his cum, still gagging after what were mere minutes but seemed like hours of choking on his beefy cock.
Vision spotty, tremors run through your body—both ends so thoroughly fucked out—that it doesn’t register that Gojo is once again lifting your body bringing you towards the edge of the bed.
If you thought Gojo was going to give you aftercare from having used your body like one of his anime fleshlights, you’d be correct—but not before one last round. 
Lifting your hips off his luxe bed Gojo positions your wobbly legs on his shoulders. His eyes are blown out and crazed with his own twisted perversion. Weakened and spent himself as cock twitched from overstimulation but he’s never been a quitter—determined to make you cum again and again before one of you finally passes out.
Your toes wiggle and you keen as his tongue ravenously dips between your toes. Trailing his tongue past the arch of your foot to bite your heel.
“You’re so fucking sexy, Bunny—the best pussy in the whole world, how could you ever think she was broken? You were just waiting for me to use her huh?”
“S-shut up–Toru, j-jeez…”
Your windpipes had been fucked raw and you’re croaking which to your dismay only seems to turn Gojo on more and he’s tapping his tender engorged cockehead on your clit. Your brows pinch together as you bite back moans from his frenulum catching and chafing so wonderfully over your clitoral hood.
“Puhleaseeee, Honey Bunny! Let me fuck you a bit more now that we know you are as ecchi coded as I am, m’kay my pervy princess?”
The very thought shames you and you think your heart might seize from embarrassment if it doesn’t give out from pleasure first and your heart feels like it might beat out of your chest chest from all the pet names Gojo is bestowing upon you. 
“Toru…”
You try to reason with him through your defeated huffs as you press your legs shut together.
“...y-you made me cum from your fingers n’ your cock.. Y-You won. Pleaseee—I-I don’t even think I can cum any more.” 
Not convinced Gojo pushes your legs back.
“Oh, is that right? Let’s ask her then!”
Gojo delivers another smack onto your slippery pussy as if on the command of her new owner your obedient cunt immediately leaks a bit more creamy slick onto his palm.
“See, baby? She says you can though and that she’s tired of you running from it Bunny—”
Still hugging your legs together in his grasp, Gojo lowers himself to rub his cheek against your pussy like it was his favorite pillow. 
“Don’t fret my pervy lil’ pussy I won't let Bunny deprive you any longer from what you really need.”
You groan yet Gojo is more gentle this time as he gingerly rolls you onto your belly and lifts your hips to slide his giant Agumon pillow underneath.
Urgh, did it have to be this one!?
There's no time for complaints though once Gojo spreads your cheeks wide. A glob of spit hits your crack as his thumb prods against your shy puckering rear hole while he humps his cock between the fat of your thighs through your soggy swollen folds. 
“Shiiit imma fuck this tight lil’ bunny hole next time baby, m’kay?”
The threat causes you to shudder yet all your back talk and sass is gone from his illicit preparations as he elicits heady mewls from your hoarse throat. Your cunt flutters eagerly to have him fill you again as his fingers imprint themselves into your bottom.
The anticipation is so intense as bracing for his size ripping through you you nearly fail to notice Gojo is now humming to himself—humming—THE DIGIMON CHAMPIONS THEME SONG!?
OH HE HAD YOU ALL THE WAY FUC—
—And suddenly you’re screaming again, eyes glued to the back of your skull as his hips jerk forward, drilling his dick past your walls to pound directly into your cervix with the tempo of a  madman.
OH FUCK! …s’good!
You finally surrender letting your cunt control your brain as you throw ass back to meet his frenzied thrusts. Like a drug addict from the first real taste your pussy is already addicted to the feeling of his cock destroying you.
“S’toru–S’toru–S’toru–FUHHHHCK!”
His name fell from your lips like a mantra, the only word your brain—now thoroughly fucked smoothed—could remember.
The sight of you chasing your own pleasure as your ass slammed back onto his pelvis, your skin rippling as it bounced and splashed frothy fluids onto his abs sent him further into perverse degeneracy. 
“F-Fuck Bunny—baby, this pussy too good—We can’t tell Suguru for a while, kay? He’ll want to fuck you too and this pussy is just f’me. Suguru gets all the pussy s’tell me you’ll keep yours f’er me. Thought you were broken but you just needed my cock this whole time—”
Burying your face in the sheets bashfully at the mention of Suguru, your cunt pulls more taut around Gojo’s cock.
“—FUHH, g-go out with me yeah, Bunny? Love you s’much—SHIIIIT—buy you whatever you want—t-take you where you want—this dick s’yours Bun Bun—all yours!”
Plunging into deeper if it were even possible Gojo’s blunted nails drug into the fat of your ass and hips, it wouldn’t scar but it would certainly add to the inevitable bruising. 
“I’ll never even look at a non 2D woman again as long as I have you as my lil’ onahole—shit I’ll never even buy one of those again unless it's in the shape of your pussy—F-FUCK, w-wait–y-you think we could get one made in the shape of your pussy–my girlfriend’s perfect pussy?!”
It’s too much—too overwhelming and your mind is slowly but surely being corrupted by Gojo. Otherwise the image of him whining while fucking a onahole casted from your cunt as he watches you finger yourself would have never in a million years popped into your mind. 
Determined to see you unhinged in every respect, Gojo didn’t want to deny you pleasure but if he had to be a little mean to you so you could finally be honest with him then so be it. 
Slowly pulling out, your expression is near frantic as you look back at him. Your mouth gaping and babbling nonsensically for him not for him to stop—you were so close.
Gojo simpers, relishing in your cute cockdrunk face scrunched with confusion from him pulling out so suddenly. 
“W-Words baby, c’mon I just spilled my heart out here!”
Your pussy weeps longingly for Gojo’s cock as your body shakes with a yearning begging to be filled again. 
God help you, you want him. 
You want him and his sinfully curved demon dick badly, it’s all you could think about—Not even remembering what life was like before he so perversely rearranged your guts.  However, not only did he know how to hit all your spots, he knew you—and despite him completely disregarding all of the rules you had initially set, he was the first guy who actually cared about how you felt during sex, even if he was a perverted otaku.
There was simply no use in denying it any longer. 
You caved.
Tears streaming down your face as you hiccupped your admission of affections for him, red-faced and flustered.
“S’toru, I-I’ll be your girlfriend—need you n’need your cock s’much—”
Pressing the side of your face against the mattress you bring a shaky hand through your legs, fingers slipping over your slick as you part your pussy lips—your vacant core exposed and fluttering, begging for him just as hard.
“—m’also you’re onahole T-Toru, I promise i’ll only fuck you, j-just please keep fucking me, i wanna cum on your cock, want your cum in me Toru baby!”
You might die from the shame of it all once you sober up from being utterly cockdrunk and stupefied but all you could think about right now was Gojo’s hard dick laying heavy pipe back into your cunt.
Something snaps in Gojo.
Head over heels for you now, Gojo knew from that moment on he’d never let you go. 
Real or 2D—no could compare to you in Gojo’s eyes. 
Toru finally found something he loved more than digimon—your perfect lil’pussy.
And he was going to show her how much he loved her right now.
Taking what was so graciously presented to him this time around, you’re short circuiting once he’s finally inside you again your most base needs being satiated turning you into a cockfiendish whore crying for him to fuck you harder as you grip his sheets like you could rip them apart. 
His strokes become more merciless, unrelenting on your pussy and Gojo leans his weight onto your back, legs bent crouching on top of you, his hips becoming manic they thrashed forward in short heavy thrusts to hammer you into the mattress.
Gojo himself is beyond gone. 
Disregarding all promises of mentioning otaku shit while he was wrecking your cunt.  
“Fuck bunny this feels better then what I thought Agnewomon’s pussy would be like— you'd look so sexy in that cosplay. Gonna have you dress up for me and show you off at cons. I’ll buy you whatever you want, anything, the whole fucking world yeah? Just fuck—wear those those vibrating panties while you cosplay too, you’d like that?”
You tightened groaning at his debauchery, something that was not missed at all by Gojo who by this point had fucked his own self dumb in your angelic cunt. White strands of his hair stuck to both of your faces as he tiled your head back so he could see how desperately those little hearts danced in your dilated pupils before they were reduced to nothing more than mere splotches whiting out your vision.
“Fuck u really are a slut huh bunny? Tightening at the thought of all those otaku perverts looking at you in that skimpy outfit while I control the buzzing on that lil clit. But they can’t have you—m’the only otaku pervert that knows how to make you cum!”
Delirious with melodic honeyed cries spilling from you, you just wanted him to stop talking—pointing out every single time your body responded to his ecchi tastes becoming your tastes and now just yearning for a taste of him. 
Reaching back you’re pulling him down to smash your lips together. Messy, but you could care as Gojo tried to swallow your tongue fucking his own into your mouth with a force that matched his cock. If fucking you was heaven then kissing you was nirvana—he’d give you the whole world if he could keep fucking you like this forever.
Gojo needs you to cum again soon as the feral need breed your tummy until it swells with his seed has him losing the little sanity he even had to begin with. A virgin until today he’d saved up so much waiting for your tight cunt this whole time. 
Moving his lips away from yours only for air, your chest heaves harmonies cries from his hand weaving under your bodies. Jittery fingers swiped frantically over your clit, hurling you towards your euphoric climax as his lips descend back upon yours.
“Cum Bunny—I got ya baby.”
Deliberately plowing himself harder against your cervix, your body seizes up releasing tension into pure white energy that you swore was pumping through your every vein as an extension of your pussy as his heavy load spurts to paint your walls and sear your insides as his thrusts continue to swill his seed inside you, pushing it further into your womb—-thank fuck for birth control.
However that was the last thing you remember before you go limp, temporarily blacked out as you swear you’ve transcended to a celestial plane of existence. One where all slutted out souls went to escape from the unearthly pleasure they’ve been tortured by. You don’t know how long you’ve been out but you're squirming as you come back to consciousness. Realizing your now back on your back as your hips involuntarily rocking against something thick and wet. 
When you finally manage to open your eyes you're greeted by Gojo tongue slurping at your clit and lapping up the cum oozing out of your battered hole like it was a refreshingly creamy bowl of kakigori. His hands embedded themselves into your thighs pinning them to the bed nibbling on your clit and having your already overstimulated core climaxing on his tongue once more.
Strings of your sticky nectar connect his tongue to your cunt as he looks up at you. Having the audacity to grin lovingly at you as if he didn’t look like a downright starved and deranged man with a sheen of shared fluids dribbling down his chin. He’s pussy drunk once again this time buzzed off the pungent yet sweet taste of his cum marinating in your creamy tenderized cunt.  
Gojo is cheesin’ at you like he’s found his favorite spot in the world—and he had as far as he was concerned.
“You said it was too messy, remember Bunny? The least I can do to make it up to you is scoop every drop out of your runny lil’ cunt with my tongue! What kind of boyfriend would I be to have all this cum soaking my Bunny’s slutty little thong and spilling down her thighs while out to dinner—so I decided to have mine a little early.”
FUCKING HELL—DINNER! What time was it?! 
Disordented, your head is fuzzy and you could feel the soreness settling in your muscles. You didn’t think you’d be able to get out of this bed in the next 24 hours, let alone make it to dinner—if you hadn’t already missed it! 
“Nnnn, n-not like I can go anymore Toru, s’all your f-fault!”
Your bruised lips poke out into pout. Gojo chuckles at you how cute you look and he rises up from between your thick thighs to boop you on the nose as he gazes adoringly at you.
“I know princess m’sorry—I already texted Shoko saying you couldn’t, don’t worry~~”
But your eyes widened as you were now fully worried. 
Worried as to what the fuck Gojo actually texted them! 
“T-Toru—”
“—I just told them you weren’t feeling well, was that okay?”
Quickly assuaging your fears—you can relax a bit for now (although you were sure you’d have a lot of explaining to do later) as Gojo pulls you to him again and softly kisses your neck, hands returning to your ass to rub soothing circles on your chaffed skin. 
Relaxing again floods sleep into your eyes. A welcome godsend honestly, so you can process everything that just happened, especially Gojo aggressively fucking a love confession out of you. 
“And m’sorry if I got carried away Bun… but you were so good for me, so fucking perfect! Just relax and I’ll take care of you! I’ll handle everything—for you and your nasty lil’ cunt. I love you both and I’ll keep both my pretty girls happy forever! I promise!”
Gazing at you with cartoonishly sparkling eyes, you have to look away from Gojo lest your ears altogether burn up in embarrassment from his shameless and yet a hundred percent earnest vocalization of affections that somehow still got your heart racing.
“—oh and my parents will be here tomorrow—we can tell them right? They will be so excited! They've been telling me since I was little I shouldn’t let you get away! Ooo! Ooo! Maybe now that we're dating they’ll let us use their sex dungeon! We need to think of a safe word though Bunny—”
Scarcely comprehending anything he is saying to you, your mind like your pussy had been fully liquified. Both ruthlessly corrupted by Gojo’s long otaku cock and pervy ass fantasies which is no surprise seeing as his family even owns a—
HOL’ THE ENTIRE FUCKUP—A SEX DUNGEON!?
Like a shot of caffeine directly into your veins your eyes nearly pop out of your head as you blink at him dumbfounded, mouth hanging open.  
“Doesn’t that sound fun, Bunny!? My parents are so cool! When I turned 18 my dad even gave me some of his rare and one-of-a-king hentai figures for my collection to get me started and then—”
Tuning him out you’re gagged at the unexpected revelations—and his parents always seemed like such charming n’ decent God fearing people too. Well known to be ruthless in the business world, but upstanding global philanthropists nonetheless.
Well the apple sure as hell didn’t fall too far from the sordid sex fiend tree, that was for damn sure!
Clearly you had no idea what you were getting yourself into or had unleashed by agreeing to be Gojo’s girlfriend. I mean, could no longer deny your growing feelings for him—plus he did just give you multiple back-breaking-terrifyingly-mind-numbing-earth-shattering-orgasms. Not to mention, you would definitely be getting one of every Hermes bag ever made if you wanted one—but at what cost?
Your Dignity? 
Self-respect? 
The right to call yourself a functional and contributing non-degenerate member of society?
Who knows really…
Although perhaps dating a Gojo, the next heir at that, you’d be too rich and highly regarded for people to even care (we’ll except for your friends giving y’all hell but you could eventually make peace with that).
You internally groan as the gentle touches on your bottom morph into lustful gropes and you know your brand new boyfriend would not be granting rest for your totally demolished lil’ pussy anytime soon unless you could distract him a bit.
“—Toru, Toru baby listen, please.”
Interrupting him, you muster the energy to put on the sweetest face you can manage in your exhausted state. 
And of course, Gojo, as always and yet unknowingly, tests the limits of your tolerance.
“Yes, my whittle Bunny, my kinky baby girl—hentai goddess divine?”
Gojo nuzzles your nose in an eskimo kiss as he showers you with ‘loving compliments’. 
Scrunching your face, you grit your teeth through your already weak smile to stop yourself from losing it at him referring to you as ‘hentai goddess divine’—y’all would definitely be having a talk about that as well as appropriate in-public pet names later though.
“Babyyyyy—I’m so sticky and sore, why don’t you be a good boyfriend and get stuff ready for us to take a bath, hm? Maybe find me something else to wear too, hm?”
You did need a bath and you calculated even with his energetic disposition it should take him at least 15-20 minutes to delegate the tasks and get everything together considering how huge his mansion was.
“Oh! Of course, of course! Just wait here! I’ll be right back, my ecchi angel.”
Brow-twitching you sit up to wave at him with another strained smile as he scrambles to put on pants and heads out of his room.
You sigh tiredly and make yourself comfy on his cloud like pillows. 
Thinking he’s finally left and you can savor some much needed time to make peace with what you got yourself into by agreeing to be the girlfriend of an otaku nerd like Gojo Satoru—
—when his head suddenly peaks back in the room with a sheepish look on his face.
“Heh, you know Bunny, was thinking—you really didn’t think I could code crack your cute lil’ cunt now did ya?”
Your eyes are closed but your fists are balling angrily gripping onto the pillows surrounding you.
“Don’t worry Bunny, yours is the only pussy my dick is digidestined for!”
With that, Gojo narrowly avoids the Agumon pillow plushie that is swiftly hurled at his head as he dashes away from the door, his merry yet hysterical laughter echoing through the halls.
©blkkizzat 2024. do not steal works or gfx, do not translate.
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⏭ a/n: this fic was wayyyy too long but i've been kinda mean to y'all gojo glazers lately rejoicing in your sorrows cause you are now miserable like the rest of us lmfao, so consider this y'alls bone :P tbh im kinda surprised this is the first full gojo fic i've written lol, it was fun tho cause otaku!gojo is a freak for pussy would drive you insane in all the right and wrong ways. i still have invisible man gojo and ceo/professor gojo planned tho (plus that frat boy satosugu request).
plug choso p3 next! (i promise!!!) taglist.
reblogs and comments are my life's blood ty ᥫ᭡ .ᐟ
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waywardsalt · 6 months
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:3
#some tag rambles bc im having a bunch of loz thoughts to hey why not do a short lived tag ramble#starting with the bad i have thought more on how i feel totk fucked up its characters and its like. yeah any arcs that are there are bad#zeldas is dogshit all of the sages are just. VERY tell no show and it really doesnt matter and otherwise idk#nothing wrong with a static character but imo with a static character you then have to show more of them#reveal some things. also doesnt really happen. the main speaking cast are also kinda weak in relation to link#they dont really work off of him very well bc hes… not treated like a character. hes just some virtuous everyman in the story#so theres no actual chemistry between him or the other characters bc he isnt treated a character so like. he has almost no chemistry#its all mostly one sided and none of the sages but zelda have any real chemistry with other major characters either#and the major characters zelda has chemistry with barely matter so fuck it. like when ppl talk abt like. loz stories#and ppl talk abt how yeah they arent the best but totk is rlly bad. i dont feel like any other loz stories are baaaaad#not in the same way. but they dont feel as egregiously fumbled. imo its bc of the characters most of them time#ofc story can be strong enough and im not discounting stuff like mm and oots themes and atmosphere and stuff#it seeeems to me the most popular non zelda sage is tulin? but mostly bc hes a sweet kid and thats fine and all but there doesnt seem to#be much else to him hes otherwise kinda unremarkable bc he just doesnt do much else and seems to exists mostly to serve gameplay and plot#botw did it better bc the champions actively had a dynamic and a relationship with link they arent the deepest but they have more substance#botw zelda is arguably the strongest character in botw with a unique personality and genuine relationship to link even if we just see it#in the memories and seeing her warm up to link is cool but imp they fumble it in the ending of her arc and how it kinda contradicts stuff#and in totk they doubled the fuck down on her unlocking her powers for reasons related to link and decided ig shed figure she needs to be#links forever bestie and hypeman and she kinda just revolves around him in a really superficial way and this is the negative extreme#of a character being bolstered by being connected to link. but anyways in loz its the characters that tend to be the strongest points#and the characters with a clear dynamic and relationship to link shine the most. think groose ghirahim ravio midna fi marin linebeck sheik#the list could go on but the characters who get a chance to shine by interacting with the Player Character are the ones who stick out#and ofc they get more screen time but they cant avoid that character development or general character fleshing out bc they are in some way#tied to link and in a sort of way link himself is more fleshed out through how those other characters react to him if that makes sense#i think loz is at its best when a good bit of emphasis and effort is placed on characters and character relationships#and when thise relationships and character are written well ofc this fucking matters too#anyways thats why ph is one of the best we love our character heavy black sheep them ds characters carry so hard and so fucking well mwah
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tender-rosiey · 1 year
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1am thoughts, thinking about Gojo introducing kid Megumi to his newborn baby and Megumi being protective of them and even calling them his little sister/brother at one point and gojo is running LAPS he's just overwhelmed and happy over a small yet powerful phrase.
to protect — gojo satoru x f!reader
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a/n: this is so cute i am gonna cry also megumi is like 11-12 here
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you’re finally back home, after a long day at the hospital. you’re finally engulfed in the comfort of your bed while your husband is still sat up with his little girl bundled in his arms.
he hasn’t let go of her since you have been discharged.
“’toru, honey, you have to sleep soon; you can hold her tomorrow,” you sleepily murmur to your husband.
he nods and whispers, “I know. It’s just I—I can’t believe it’s real,” he kisses her forehead softly, “that she is finally here, our little princess.”
a tired smile makes its way to your lips. you hum in understanding, gently caressing his cheek. he sighs happily, before looking at you, “but you, missy, actually need to rest. you’ve had a long day.”
you frown and he chuckles, and his hand moves to stroke your hair, “rest, pretty. you were a champion today,” you move to nuzzle closer to his side and your arm wraps around his torso.
and so his little girl is comfortably nestled in one of his arms, while the other is wrapped around you so his hand can pet your head lovingly.
satoru truly feels like he is holding the world in his hands right now.
suddenly, the door slowly creaks open and a very familiar face peaks from it. satoru chuckles, “come in, megumi; they’re both asleep anyway.”
the boy carefully pads his way to gojo.
he is so used to seeing him being all goofy and unserious, so it catches him a bit off-guard how serene and quiet he is being right now. megumi looks at the sleeping baby then whispers, “what’s her name?”
“d/n,” satoru answers fondly.
megumi nods then observes her for a small while, “she really is a perfect mix between the both of you.”
a soft and quiet laugh escapes satoru’s lips, “you’re right,” he looks up at megumi with a grin, “you wanna hold her?”
the boy is taken back and his expression betrays him as nervousness takes over his face. his eyes don’t leave the girl and his gaze is more than troubled, “…what if I hurt her?”
satoru shakes his head, “you scared? she is my daughter; she is the strongest baby ever,” he grins, “no one can hurt her.”
megumi rolls his eyes, but quickly directs his focus to the little girl. he takes a moment, before he extends his arms. satoru gently places her in his arms. megumi’s hold on her is protective, and he doesn’t look as awkward as satoru thought he would.
actually, he is quite the natural.
he gently rocks her, and he can’t help but smile at her sleeping face. megumi whispers to her, “hi there.”
she coos at him, and starts swaying his arms around. she slowly opens her eyes, and a tiny smile appears on her chubby face. megumi’s eyes widen a little, and he immediately looks at gojo, “she is smiling.”
satoru laughs, “she is a very smiley baby, but i think she likes you a lot. she only smiled at y/n and me,” he feels you stir a bit in your sleep.
he pulls you closer and rubs your shoulder then he giggles at how quickly you fall back asleep. while satoru is occupied by you, megumi is staring in awe at little miss gojo.
later, satoru wakes up in the middle of the night to check on his little girl in the adjacent room. he groggily gets up, after kissing your forehead. he walks there, and when he finally reaches the room, he notices the lights are already on, and the door is left a bit open.
he peaks a little into the room, and sees megumi standing by the crib. he is fondly looking at d/n, and gently petting her head. he is whispering something to her, but satoru is still able to hear it all the same.
“don’t grow up to be annoying like your dad, please.”
satoru scowls, and contemplates bursting into the room, and bullying the hell out of megumi. however, he ultimately decides against it. he doesn’t end up regretting the decision.
megumi gently boops her nose, “you’re like a little sister to me now, so I promise to protect you.”
she squeals and makes grabby hands at him, and he chuckles, “you believe me, huh?”
satoru slowly backs away from the door and walks away. when he is a safe distance from the door, he starts running and bursts into your shared room.
he dramatically falls to the ground, “that was… the cutest thing ever! after d/n and y/n’s smiles, of course.”
he stands up, proudly. his heart is at ease as he now knows that there is yet another person to look after his baby girl, if something happens. a content grin is on his face as he enjoys the silence and comfort. it’s short lived, as always.
a pillow is thrown at his face, and he stumbles to the ground.
“that’s for waking me up, satoru!”
“noooo, baby, I am sorry!”
“uh—,” megumi awkwardly stands at the door, holding d/n up, “guys, she pooped.”
satoru grins, and excitedly stands up—with a camera that he got out of nowhere to take photos of her—he coos, “aww! your first shit, pretty girl? what a good girl!”
megumi places her on the changing table beside your bed. the smell of her great ‘achievement’ fills the door, and he takes the chance of gojo being distracted to run out of the room, before another nuclear explosion drops.
the girl is gleefully clapping upon seeing her dad, and he reciprocates the smile tenfold. he gently holds her feet and sways them slightly, “such a big girl, already pooping!”
“want daddy to change your diapers for you?” he coos and the girl just puts her thumb in her mouth and starts kicking her feet. he chuckles and slowly opens the diaper. he is met with the vilest smell, and he can’t believe his sweet daughter can produce such smells.
however, he quickly composes himself, and tries to make his way through the travail of changing the diaper. he proves to be too weak because he, after a moment, looks at you, “uh, babe, teamwork makes the dream work?”
you groan, falling back to the bed.
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charlietheepicwriter7 · 10 months
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Hey, does anyone remember that one episode of the OG teen titans where it was that contest of champions or whatever? Becuase...
"Welcome, champions all! I am the Master of Games, and you are hereby invited to compete in the Tournament of the Strongest! Each of you have been specially chosen as the smartest and strongest each species has to offer."
"Hey, isn't that a fourteen-year-old?"
5K notes · View notes
fastandcarlos · 6 days
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Game, Set & Match : ̗̀➛ Lando Norris
summary: after deciding to go to the tennis whilst at home, lando’s attention is captured by one of the players he watches on court
pairing: lando x tennis!reader
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liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and 2,583,382 others
landonorris: such a joy to be courtside today to watch some super tennis…a nice reminder that coordination with a racket is not my strongest skill 🎾
259,462 comments
username1: how does he manage to look good in every single photo of him!?
maxverstappen1: gonna tell us who that other racquet belongs to or leave us hanging..? 🤔
username2: he was there to watch yn, I was there and he didn’t take his eyes off of her 😂
carlossainz55: pay close attention and then one day you might be good enough to challenge me!
georgerussell63: that’s the smile you have when there’s someone around you fancy 😂
landonorris: @/georgerussell63 I’ve got no idea what you’re talking about…
username3: do we think that maybe there’s something here??
username4: they would be such a good match if they were together 😭
ynusername: hope you enjoyed the match, it was lovely to have you there!
landonorris: @/ynusername you were amazing, it was awesome to see you play in person too 👏🏻
username5: he wasn’t even sat in her player box so I think we all just need to calm down 😮‍💨
oscarpiastri: that’s it, pretend you were there for the tennis!
username6: maybe ask yn if she’ll give you a few lessons 😉
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liked by djokernole, naomiosaka and 358,413 others
ynusername: CHAMPION!! words will never do justice to explain just how much this means to me 🏆✨
31,857 comments
username7: the most incredible week, congratulations yn on getting the W ❤️
andymurray: congratulations on an incredible run yn, that was the best I’ve ever seen you play 🎾
username8: she only played this well because lando was watching 🙃
igaswiatek: an honour to be on the other side of the net and see you pick up your first trophy ☺️
username9: can’t believe you’re the champion, a dream week for you ✨
naomiosaka: girl I am so unbelievably proud of you for what you’ve achieved 👏🏻
landonorris: it was an honour to be here and watch you play, congratulations once again ☺️
ynusername: @/landonorris it was awesome to meet you after the match 🤝
username10: lando norris needs to start turning up to more tennis games!!
username11: are we just gonna ignore the fact that he’s still here and in her comments now too!?!
djokernole: that was an incredible match yn, the first of many victories I’m sure 👏🏻
username12: wait for lando to try and convince us that he’s always loved tennis and this has nothing to do with yn 😂
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liked by georgerussell63, danielricciardo and 2,483,172 others
landonorris: he goes to one tennis game and now he thinks he’s a pro at padel (which I definitely am btw!)💪🏻
216,607 comments
username13: yn definitely needs to come and give you some lessons 😂
maxverstappen1: can absolutely confirm that you are not a pro at padel in the slightest 🏸
alex_albon: if you’re a pro then I must be the ronaldo of padel 🙄
landonorris: @/alex_albon there is absolutely no chance you are better at padel than me ‼️
username14: if nothing else, at least you’re better than oscar!!
username15: we want video proof or we’re not believing a word of it norris
georgerussell63: stop lying to yourself lando we’ve talked to you about this!!
username16: did he go to the tennis just to pick up tips after all???
danielricciardo: I can’t believe you’ve actually just called yourself a pro at padel 🤦🏻
landonorris: @/danielricciardo it would be unfair of me to lie to the people
username17: idc how good you are at padel, you still look for to me 🔥
oscarpiastri: sometimes you’re so bad you make me look good at this game!
username18: everyone just needs to take a step back, we all know how much of a sport geek lando is…
ynusername: one day I’ll teach you how to be a true racket sports pro 😂
landonorris: @/ynusername I might just take you up on that offer…
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liked by mclaren, landonorris and 327,408 others
ynusername: thank you mclaren for welcoming me into your garage for the weekend, I had the time of my life 🧡🏎️
42,604 comments
username19: watch the hardcore fans try and convince us that there’s nothing going on here…
landonorris: it was amazing to have you here with us this weekend, hope you enjoyed as much as I enjoyed the tennis ☺️
ynusername: @/landonorris I think you might’ve just turned me into an f1 fan 🥺
landonorris: @/ynusername I knew I’d be able to convince you 🥲
username20: oscar already taking on the proud role of third wheel 😂
username21: he’s here in the likes and the comments, my mind is made up here!!
emmaraducanu: can’t believe you went to the f1 without me 😭
ynusername: @/emmaraducanu I’m sorry please don’t hate me 😂
username22: pls mclaren give us what we want and film some content with these two
oscarpiastri: it was an honour to meet you and show you around the garage 🧡
username23: how long are they gonna drag this out before they put themselves!?
maxverstappen1: just so you know red bull are so much better than mclaren 😉
landonorris: @/maxverstappen1 stop lying to her 😂 I made sure to tell yn just how superior we are!!
username24: omg just hurry up and kiss already 😮‍💨
mclaren: you’re welcome back anytime, thank you for paying us a visit 🧡
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liked by carlossainz55, oscarpiastri and 2,594,473 others
landonorris: she shot an ace through my heart and now it’s game, set and match norris 💞
47,139 comments
username25: lando coming straight at us with the world’s worst tennis pun 😩
maxverstappen1: that caption is the mist disgusting thing I’ve ever seen from you 🙄
username26: look at that smile she must make him so happy!!
danielricciardo: how long did it take you to come up with that caption…
landnorris: @/danielricciardo longer than I’d like to admit to!
username27: that caption has given me such an ick 😂
oscarpiastri: still gonna argue you that you want to the tennis to actually watch the tennis!?
username28: they just knew that there was no pretending that they weren’t together with us!
charles_leclerc: alex told me to tell you she wants to meet yn asap!
landonorris: @/charles_leclerc let’s do dinner so I can share all your embarrassing stories
username29: the writing in the sand has made my heart so happy 🥺
ynusername: I think I might’ve changed my mind after reading that caption 😂
landonorris: @/ynusername sorry but you’re mine now and I’m not letting you go!
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liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 428,066 others
ynusername: turns out tennis and f1 do go pretty well together after all 🥺
48,721 comments
username30: I’m so obsessed with these two I can’t cope already
landonorris: I think they make quite the team 💞
username31: if we didn’t believe lando then I think we can definitely believe yn 😂
oscarpiastri: do I still have to pretend that you and lando are definitely not dating???
ynusername: @/oscarpiastri no you’re relieved of your duties now 😂
username32: can’t wait for all the couples sports content we’re gonna get from these two!
danielricciardo: reluctantly giving my racing boyfriend up so he can spend time with you 🥹
ynusername: @/danielricciardo you’re welcome to third wheel whenever you want!
landonorris: @/danielricciardo no you’re not 😂 leave the two of us the hell alone!
username33: ngl I love how they love the sport that the other person does so passionately 😩
maxverstappen1: we’re relying on you now yn to teach this kid how to play padel 🙃
username34: thank you to whoever decided to introduce lando to yn at the tennis that day 🙏🏻
mclaren: I guess we should look into getting you a pass 😉🧡
ynusername: @/mclaren yes yes yes yes!!!
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˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗
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othercrossee · 2 years
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Seaweed have to kick every member of that hot gene family, SAD
0 notes
aenramsden · 6 months
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The following is not my idea; it was the original brainchild of a friend of mine named Omicron, with help from various others including EarthScorpion, TenfoldShields, @havocfett and ShintheNinja:
So, you know what I want to do one day? Run (or play in) a D&D campaign in which the Big Bad Super Dragon that is fuckoff ancient and unfathomably powerful and whose actions have shaped history and bent the course of nations and had repercussions on the whole culture and society in the region where it's set; the Bonus Special Boss for some endgame optional quest after you defeat the direct BBEG and win the campaign...
... is a white dragon.
To explain this for people not deep into 5e monster lore; D&D dragons are sapient beings, and known for their instincts and tendencies, and whenever you meet an big evil dragon that's really old it's usually this ancient creature of terrible intellect Smaug-ing it up all over the place.
Except white dragons are fucking stupid. Like, they're still capable of speech and thought! They're just… feral, hungry morons. And you almost never see them portrayed as ancient wyrms for that reason; they lack majesty. Critical Role did it, yes, but even then, Vorugal is explicitly the most bestial member of the Chroma Conclave, and the others are the more intelligent planners and long-term threats. An ancient white as a nation-defining endboss, though; not a thug for a smarter master but as the strongest and biggest threat around is just not the sort of thing you tend to see.
Adventurers: "Oh wise Therunax the Munificent, gold dragon of Law and Good, what can you tell us adventurers of the evil dragons which rule this land?" Therunax the Munificent, 500-year old Gold Dragon: "Good adventurers, know this: this land is torn apart by the evil of Tiamat's spawn. The eastern marches are the dwelling of Furinar the Plague-Bringer, black dragoness whose hoard is a thousand sicknesses contained in the body of her tributes. The southern volcanic mountains are the roosting of Angrar the Wrathful, the fiery red dragon, who brings magmatic fury on all who do not worship him. And the northern peaks are home to Face-Biter Mike, the oldest and most powerful of all, of whom I dread to speak." Adventurers: "F-Face-Biter Mike???" Therunax: "Oh yes, verily indeed; two thousand years has Mike lived, and his eyes have seen the rise and fall of five empires, and a hundred and score champions have sought to slay him; and each and every one he bit their fucking face off."
Like... I want to see a campaign where Face-Biter Mike is genuinely the most powerful dragon in the region, if not the entire world. Where sometimes he descends on a city to grab himself some meatsicles and causes a localised ice age by the beat of his vast wings and the frigid wastes of his mighty breath and by the chill his mere presence brings to everything for miles around him, and everyone just has to deal with that for the next decade. An entire era of civilization comes to an end, an empire falls, tens of thousands starve in the winter, all because Mike wanted a snack. Where his hoard is an unfathomably vast mass of jewels and artefacts and precious stones frozen in an unmelting glacier, except he is a nouveau riche idiot with fuckall appraising skill, so half of his hoard is coloured glass or worthless knicknacks, and he doesn't give a shit.
"Your Draconic Majesty, this crown is… It's pyrite." "Yeah, well, it's brighter than this dusty old thing made out of real gold, it's my new best treasure. Throw the other one away." "…throw the Burnished Tiara of Bahamut, forged in the First Age of Man, your majesty???" "See? I can't even remember its fucking name." "But my lord-" "DO YOU WANT TO BE A MEATSICLE" "…I will fetch a trash bag, your majesty."
But at the same time, he's not stupid, he's just simple, and in some ways that makes him more dangerous than the usual kinds of scheming Big Bad you see in these things, while simultaneously justifying why Orcus remains on his throne (because he's lazy). Face-Biter Mike doesn't make convoluted plans or run labyrinthine schemes; he just has a talent for violence and a pragmatic, straightforward approach to turning any kind of problem he struggles with into a problem that can be resolved with violence. Face-Biter Mike has one talent and it's horrifying physical power, so his approach to any complicated problem is "how do I turn this into a situation where I can fly down and bite this dude's face off?" with absolutely no regard for the collateral damage or consequences of doing so, because those are also things he can turn into face-bitable problems.
"My lord, the dread necromancer Nikodemion is using his undead dragons to attempt a conquest of the eastern kingdom; his agents are everywhere, his plans are centuries in the making, what can we do against such a mastermind?" "I'm gonna fly over the capital and eat the eastern king." "M-my lord???" "The kingdom will collapse without leadership, Nikodemion will win his war, he'll take the capital and crown himself king." "And that helps us… how?" "Once he does I'll fly over to the capital and eat him." "…" "This is why you advisors all suck. You're all about convoluted plans when the only thing I need to win is know where my enemy is so I can fly down there and eat him. Stop overthinking things."
And, like, yeah, it's a simplistic plan, but when you're several hundred tons of nigh invincible magical death, you don't need brilliant strategy; the smartest way to win a war is, in this case, the simplest. He's not even all that clever at figuring out the consequences of face-biting, he's just memorised the common consequences of doing so.
(If you want to go all in on Mike being the major mover and shaker in the region; Nikodemion only even has a pet zombie dragon because Mike killed the last dragon to show up and contest his turf but wasn't going to eat a whole dragon by himself. Nikodemion got to stick around and amass that much power because Mike ate the Hero of the Realm while he was adventuring because he figured the Hero would come and try to slay him at some point. Nikodemion got started because Mike ate half the leadership of the Academy of High Magic who typically keep evil wizards and necromancers in check. And then eventually this product of Mike's casual, careless actions becomes a big enough problem to bother Mike personally, at which point Mike eats him too.)
He doesn't even really fail upwards, either! He is regularly reduced to nothing but the glacier he stores his hoard in, but he's Face-Biter Mike so nobody wants to commit to actually ending him forever lest they get their faces bitten the fuck off. And his hoard's in a huge-ass magical glacier so nobody can get to it without running into the Invading Russia problem; it's hard to wage war when everything is frozen over and you're both starving and freezing to death. Once he's been beaten back to his central lair and has lost all his holdings… I mean, he's still a problem, but he's a far away problem. So he loses his assets and spends a decade in a cave brooding it up while no one dares risk trying to actually kill him, and then a generation or two later he flies down to a kobold colony and gets himself some minions, or a dragon-worshipping mage comes to offer his service against a pittance from his hoard, or a particularly stupid cult starts thinking they can get in good with him and leech off his power, and then he's (hah) snowballing again.
He's also got a very… well, the kind of weird Charisma that Grineer bosses do. Like Sargas Ruk, who's a malformed idiot, but oddly charismatic. As he's a dragon, that makes him a natural sorcerer and thus Charisma is all he needs. He's pretty relaxed when he isn't in a face-biting mood, and he's kind of infectiously optimistic, because his life has taught him that he will succeed as long as he perseveres. So he just believes it.
And sometimes that's really refreshing to work for, as an evil minion of darkness! It's like, you're coming to your Evil Dragon Lord with terrible news; you've worked for evil overlords before, you know how it goes. You fall to your knees weeping and tell him that you've failed to seize the incredibly powerful magical artifact, you think your life is forfeit. And he's just like "Eh, it's okay, these things are all over the place. Better luck next time. You remember the guy who took it, right?" and you go "Y-yes, oh great lord!" and he's like "Sweet tell me his name later and I'll grab it" and then eats a frozen adventurer he kept around as a snack.
His followers tend to quickly realise that if they fail him, bringing some temple's silver or a sack of brightly coloured beads or a couple of dead cows means he's super forgiving because at least he's got something out of the day. "Oh boy, cows? It's been forever since I had those, ever since the Orc Steppe Nomads took over it's all about goats and onions. Today is a good day." He's a master of delegation by dragon standards, in that he just tells you "Just go get it done, I don't care how" rather than micromanaging you and constantly appearing as an image in smoke or taking over your campfire.
The key part of Face-Biter Mike as a threat to players (because he exists in the context of a D&D campaign) works well in that you can rely on several known quantities:
He will not pull sneaky shit that you don't see coming
He will not make convoluted plans that you must work to unravel
He will consistently attempt to come down and wreck you personally if he finds the opportunity and you are a threat to him
You cannot fight him head-on (at least not until the last leg of the campaign, and ideally as an optional boss rather than mandatory)
So as long as you are good at staying under the radar, thwarting his minions (whom he gives broad orders to with almost zero oversight) and not putting yourself in face-biting range, you can deal with him. If you succeed, it won't be the first time Mike has lost his assets and had to go brood in his glacier for a decade or two before rebuilding. It happens; he can deal with it. And that's a win for you within the context of a single campaign, so take the win.
And if you're not going to use him as an enemy, he works pretty well as a quest-giver, too! The costs for failure are obvious and straightforward, and "do whatever, just get me mine" means that players have a lot of freedom in accomplishing their goals. As far as evil overlords go he is actually one of the least dangerous to work for; his pride is relatively subdued by draconic standards, his goals are simple and typically achievable, and he is easily pleased.
(There's also a good chance he is the forefather of any draconic sorcerer in your party, because Face Biter Mike is a deadbeat dad.)
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spacelazarwolf · 1 year
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yeah. they are u fucking moron.
imagine saying shit like this while transphobic hate groups primarily championed by cis women are lobbying and voting to have trans people forcibly detransitioned. the senator who put forth a bill in my state to make sports sex segregated was a woman. the vast majority of the people who were protesting the trans clinic in my city were women. the person who got it essentially shut down was a woman. some of the strongest voices in the fight against transgender rights right now are white cis women.
what fucking planet are u all living on.
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lessi-lover · 2 months
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don't break me when i let you in II barcelona femení x teen!reader
warnings: mention of suicide, implied self harm, self hate, spanish federation.
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this is the longest i've ever written and i'm so proud thank you all for sending ideas to help me keep this draft alive x
don't break me when i let you in II barcelona femení x teen!reader
"you don't have to be strong all the time, you know?" it was an ignorant affair to believe, something only somebody with a slight sliver of saved up hope might trust. not you. not the broken shell of a person that can only believe you are the only thing keeping yourself together.
the glue to a cracked vase. in which the vase was you and you were slowly breaking under pressure that had been following you for years. if you hadn't hit rock bottom a couple months ago, you were certainly scraping the edge with your bare teeth now.
you had been one of their strongest forwards available to select from. a top forward in your league, it would be silly for them not to call you up with the titles next to your name at such a young age. it was inevitable that you would be called up for the world cup squad selection and there was nothing you could have done about it even if you tried.
you were just so helpless weren't you?
there was nobody to tell that you didn't want to travel to australia to play for a team that had ripped you inside out before you were even first national tournament debut, nobody that would understand how badly you wanted to represent your country and how willing you were to put your body on the line for it even for a single minute in spanish colours.
is that why you stayed quiet?
you stared towards yourself in the mirror, wondering if maybe your eyes had ever truly been as light as they used to tell you. that the light in your eyes you had been promised was always there had just seemingly disappeared. the eyes that they still talk about that seem so foreign to you now as you look back at yourself through shattered glass. wondering if maybe it was all just a lie.
maybe it was all just a lie.
a black and white faceless lie that everything you would go through for a ruthless tournament was for the better of you. or worse. a binary promise that everything would be okay, that all the suffering would end in good for you. or not.
but you look back through the same eyes that you were meant to be able to trust, the eyes that let everything just happen without looking back, and you still don't understand how you could be so easily deceived, taken apart from top to bottom like a neglected toy.
a useless, discardable toy. was it all a lie?
maybe the people who were meant to protect you and care for you were actually abusing you to wits' ends. maybe it wasn't that you needed the further training they made you endure after your previous training, but that you were so young and fresh and all too easy to manipulate.
maybe it was those you trusted and who sent you away with the assurance that you would be the next spanish legacy that isolated you from the world and treated you as a vessel to secure gold for spain.
but you were to blind and powerless to seek help.
you had been the silent one. the one too shattered to even bear the trial that came with the aftermath of the events following your world cup win. you knew the federation would come after you. you were the one who wanted so badly to sign the document that your teammates had but you couldn't bring yourself to look at the people who had broken you from the inside out for even just a second to speak your mind.
you were just a shell of a once strong force now weren't you?
you knew they would try and rip away each and every title you had ever worked for and your playing rights along with it. you were a world cup, champions league, copa de la reina, nations league and liga f winner. but maybe you were just a vulnerable, small cog in a relentless system that wouldn't stop until you broke down and they would throw you away like the others.
the fear of losing everything you had worked for since you were a small child paralyzed you for months. the mere thought of speaking out, of seeking help, seemed as impossible as how you got into the situation in the first place.
the federation had an iron grip on your life, they could control you whether you were defenseless to it or not and any caught wind of saying something felt like signing your own demise.
it would end you surely? don't you think that maybe speaking out for help would become the end of your career? one that had barely started as you were only freshly twenty years old? staying quiet was the better option. you had thought you could escape unscathed, but your reality was far from it.
nobody had your best interest and those who did didn't make it clear enough until you finally broke down from the denied pressure. it felt like a void sometimes. as if you were screaming and nobody could hear you, or maybe nobody cared?
no they care. didn't they?
did they care when you were forced out of bed early in the morning to complete extra practice before the day even started? did they care when you were just a young teenager illegally moving up into the senior divisions of international football to cover for seniors who had denied their call up's and was made to exhaust your body more than you ever should? did they care when the private meetings you were obligated to attend turned into time to yell at you, to break you down as if you hadn't given your entire life to the federation.
but then again, if not football what else did you have to live for?
you asked yourself these questions over and over again. each time just hoping that the harsh reminder of your situation would lessen. it never did. it never would. it would be stuck with you no matter how hard you tried to block it out, no matter how hard you tried to ignore who and what made you shrink a million times over.
the fear, the abuse, the meal plans, the body exhaustion, the denied freedom, the stolen happiness, a cruel reminder of the bottomless hole you had found yourself falling deeper and deeper and there was nothing you could do to get out.
you were truly and utterly stuck.
~
the office is cold, its white walls a stark contrast to the warmth in the hallway you had been waiting in for the past half hour. the thick carpet muffles your footsteps as you walk toward the large desk in the center of the room, the air you're walking into a harsh wind of tension that couldn't be cut with a blade if you tried.
you swallow hard, your throat dry despite the countless bottles of water you’ve consumed throughout the day. but your hydration doesn't matter now, whatever it said to you in the next twenty minutes does.
the glare of the desk lamp catches your eye, reflecting the same harsh light that seems to spotlight you everywhere, waiting for you to make your next mistake. you glance at the stern faces of the officials seated behind the desk, their expressions unreadable as they read through what looks like your performance reports.
“please, take a seat,” the head of the federation says, his voice clipped as he places his hand predatorily on your lower back and guides you to sit down. you lower yourself into the chair, the thin material of your club shorts rubbing uncomfortably against the velvet furniture.
the head official adjusts his collar, peering over them at you with a sharp look almost as though you had done something to personally offend him. but those aren't anything close to his next words.
“you’ve been doing exceptionally well, tesoro.” he begins, but his tone is far from genuine and you feel that something else is coming. “your performance has been impressive, especially considering your age and the closeness of the tournament.”
you nod, though his praise feels hollow, almost as if you're falling into a set trap made just for you. your heart races and you grip your hands on the chair. you want to speak up, to voice your concerns about the overwhelming training schedules and the strain it’s putting on your body, but the words get lost in your throat.
“we’ve decided to integrate you into the senior squad for the upcoming world cup. it’s a great opportunity, but it also means you’ll need to do far more than what you're currently putting in.”
your chest tightens. you’ve been waiting for this for a long time, but when he finally tells you it feels overwhelming and you don't understand why a moment you have been prepping for years of your life makes you feel uneasy. you push it off as nerves.
the world cup is a chance to showcase your skills on a global stage, this is your moment, don't stare it in the face and back down.
another official at the side of the room glances at you with a fleeting look of concern before turning back to his notes. he seems to recognize the strain you’re currently feeling, but his words are lost just like yours as the head continues to talk to you.
“your development is crucial to our success,” the head official says, his voice cutting through your thoughts. “we expect you to handle this responsibility with the utmost professionalism. this is an opportunity for you to prove yourself and secure your place on the national team.”
"and who knows, i have spots emptied by débiles that need filling. this is your shot don't blow it. tesoro." there is something about the way he talks to you and speaks about you over your head that makes you shiver right down to your core.
you nod again, feeling the weight of their words drop into the palm of your hand and the room seems to close in on you as they continue discussing your role to each other and the intense training you will need to undergo in the upcoming months.
the meeting ends with a firm handshake and a curt nod from yourself and as you leave the office, the clear expectations settle heavily on your shoulders, the fear of failing and the pressure to succeed feeling almost insurmountable. yourself unaware of the danger you have just put yourself in.
~
you're not even sure when it all started. you can't pinpoint when the abuse started, if you could even call it that, or if it was there the whole time and you normalised it for yourself because that was the better option instead of speaking out in your mind.
it was enough of the lack of players available that caused them to attempt to burn you out as much as they could. it was enough for the federation to take one look at you and decide that the weight of the world relied on your shoulder whether you liked it or not.
that was your purpose. it was your job to lead the team to victory without a second mistake. without a setback, through injury, responsible for the good and the bad, amidst an internal battle with yourself that was dragging you down, and most importantly with a smile on your face even if you were shattered from the inside.
a smile on your face. nobody would notice would they?
~
“siéntate, tesoro,” he commands, his tone carrying an edge of impatience and you feel yourself move quickly into his office at his voice. you sink into the chair, its firm surface a harsh contrast to how had felt in the chair only mere months ago.
“you’re here because you’ve been selected for the world cup squad,” he begins, his voice cold and he digs his hand into the desk as he leans close to you. “but let’s be clear, tesoro. being selected was only the first challenge. we expect more from you.”
you nod, but the weight of his words feel heavy and you can't help but notice that the official who had given you the sorry look was missing from his spot behind the desk.
“we’ve noticed that you’re not quite fitting the ideal player we had in mind,” he continues, and you shake off any thoughts of the past official when your eyes meet his. “you’re not fast enough, not agile enough. you’re not meeting the physical standards we expect from you.”
his words sting, each critique like a hard blow to your self-esteem that wasn't really there in the first place. “your performance has been adequate,” he says, “but adequate isn’t enough. we need you to be exceptional and above all competition. and right now, you’re neither of those.”
he leans forward, his breath fanning over you as you look down at the floor in fear. “your weight is one concern of our team, but it’s not just about being heavier or lighter. it’s about how you present yourself. we need you to be leaner, faster and even more dynamic. you’re not the perfect image we want for the team right now.”
the room seems to close in around you as he continues. “we’ve seen some players who didn’t meet our expectations and they were dropped. you need to understand that if you don’t shape up, you will be next to not enter through doors again. comprendido?"
he gestures to a pile of strawn documents on his desk and you look up from the concrete fall at the harsh snap of his fingers in your face.
“we have reports here, tesoro, that detail everything we need from you. and it’s not just about physical performance. it’s about how you look, how you’re perceived by the public. you need to be more endearing, more marketable. if you can’t fulfill that role, then we'll find another.”
his gaze is relentless and he talks to you like you're a faceless object that he can discard at his will, throw away when he feels you're not complying with his demands. he can take you off this squad the moment you defend yourself.
“you’re not here just to play; you’re here to be the face of the team. the face of spain. and right now, you’re not cutting it for us. we need you to be a star, not just another player in this tournament. and if you’re not willing to meet those expectations, then you’re in the wrong place i'm afraid.”
“now, we’re going to do something,” he continued, his voice carrying a coldness that made your stomach curl inwards as you sat fearfully in your chair. “i need you to repeat after me. ‘i am not good enough. i need to be better."
you hesitate, the lump in your throat making it hard to speak as you blinked harshly to try and to stop the tears that threatened to fall. “i am not good enough. i need to be better,” you say quietly, looking down shamefully at the floor like a small child being scolded by their parent.
“louder.” he demands, his voice cutting through the room like a whip and you try not to flinch at the volume of his words. “i need to hear you say it with conviction. you are lying through your teeth pequeña. don't lie to me, i hate liars."
“again,” he insists. “and this time, say it as if you truly believe it. i am not good enough. i need to be better." you force yourself to repeat the phrase, the words make you feel as if you're stripping away everything you ever built yourself to believe. every title, every trophy, every medal, every goal. erased.
“i am not good enough. i need to be better,” you say louder, the humiliation of his cruel exercise making your stomach lurch and you struggled to keep yourself together.
“very good,” the official says, his tone carrying a note of being pleased and you hated that you loved the feeling of his approval. “you should understand that just because you’re going to australia doesn’t mean you get to enjoy it. you’re there for work, not to have fun.”
his manipulation is chilling to the bone, designed to strip away any sense of accomplishment you had ever felt. “you’re not meant to enjoy australia, it’s not a vacation. you’re there to prove yourself, not to sightsee. you need to focus solely on the tournament, on meeting the expectations we’ve set for you. or we won't hesitate to send you home.”
“this is a serious commitment. if you let yourself get distracted, you’re failing in your duty. you’re expected to perform at your peak, and that means putting aside any thoughts of leisure or enjoyment. this isn’t about you enjoying yourself; it’s about you meeting the standards we've set for you.”
“if you allow yourself to get comfortable or take things lightly,” he warns, “you’re showing weakness. and weakness is unacceptable. you need to stay sharp, stay focused, and remember why you’re here.”
his manipulation is subtle yet even then you could tell that he knew you wouldn't fight back, he had designed it to make you feel guilty for even considering enjoying the tournament.
“this is a test of your worth,” he says. “if you can’t handle the pressure and keep your focus, you’re not fit for the team. we need you performing to the highest standards that we expect from everybody else. including you. if you can’t handle the pressure, then you’re not worthy of the position. we expect you to rise to the challenge without complaint.”
~
you were far too gone to allow somebody else to take your spot. guilty and far too gone to let yourself slip through the cracks you had been told others had fallen through. somebody wouldn't be able to deal with the kind of pain you had been trained to believe as normal.
somebody else definitely wasn't as strong as the fake front you had built up to deal with it all, or at least that's what you told yourself, it made you feel better even if you didn't believe it.
you felt like nothing.
was it the pressure? was it the memories? was it the unhealable bruises that littered you from head to toe? or was it the feeling that you gave your whole existence to people who threw you away like you were just dirt on the bottom of a shoe?
you were numb.
you couldn't even remember the last time you had felt truly happy, truly yourself. the facade of a charming female footballer you put on for the world was crumbling and you were scared that people would finally see the pain that lied underneath.
the mirror showed a person trapped between who they once were and the brokenness of who they had become, drowning in a sea of your own helplessness.
you wondered if there was any way back to the person you used to be, or if that person was gone forever, if she had fallen through but ignored by who you had been built to be. this is what rock bottom feels like. rock bottom is not knowing who you are anymore, not recognising any of the memories of the person you were before.
it's the lostness of knowing that you can't find yourself again, seeing your old self in the distance but not knowing how to reach it with the strength you so clearly do not have.
it's the painful acknowledgement that the once vibrant and full of life person who was here before has been replaced by a shadow and you're struggling to fight the dark.
had the darkness swallowed you yet?
your phone rings loudly in your ear. it's more harsh this time than the previous sounds that had escaped the device. you know who's calling you because there wasn't exactly anybody in your life that would reach out to you so religiously and determindly.
you bit down on your lip. a similar memory of you lying on the floor answering the man who had made you the emotionless person that couldn't bear to even think about the game you used to live for.
you miss the person you were. that man gutted her from the inside.
the sound pierces into the thick silence of the room, demanding you to answer as it broke through the barrier of quiet you had built up. the screen of your phone lights up and you let your eyes flicker down towards it, your phone displaying the name of the person you dreaded to see you how you are now.
a feeling you couldn't quite place as dread or relief washed over you as your phone vibrated against the cold floor. dark purple bruises forming on your legs and arms from the time you had spent laying on the bathroom floor.
you slowly reach for your phone, drops of blood dripping off your skin and onto the glass as tears make their way down your face from the dark circles that countless nights of lost sleep had created for you.
your fingers tremble as you swipe to answer the call as if they are carrying the burden you've been feeling for months, and the screen lights up with the caller's name again. you can't turn back now, you've answered the one person you would hate to see you like this.
you contemplate hanging up the phone, staying silent on your end of the call as if magically the situation would disappear and you could leave like you so badly wanted to.
you sound nothing like the person you were a year ago.
"hola amorcito. are you there?" the voice on the other end of the line breaks through your thoughts, the term of endearment so familiar yet painful almost making you burst into another set of tears but you stay strong for her because that's what he would have wanted.
"ale?" you reply, your voice steady but still shaking as you lift your phone to your ear to hear better. "i'm here." there's a soft sigh on alexia's side of the phone and you can almost picture her sitting with her girlfriend on the couch, the older woman had tried to call you throughout the week but you hadn't answered and she'd been waiting for you to call her back.
"you don't have to be strong all the time, you know?"
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