#“modern” setting

[star-dust-n-astral-wind]

Miscellaneous Moments From A "Modern Setting" Legend Of Zelda Story

Link: "I can't bring a sword to school, Fi." Fi: "...perhaps if you joined the fencing club, no one wou-" Link: "No."

---

Zelda: "I have to admit: I feel a little offended on your behalf." Link: "Why?" Zelda: "Past Heroes had to face world ending disasters, or demons of the Underworld, and you're stuck with..." Link: "Our terrible substitute teacher?" Zelda: "Yeah, it's... not fair, is it?" Link: "If it helps, he may be part of the mob." Zelda: "Not everyone you dislike is part of the mob, Link."

---

Ganondorf, in his secret lair: "Today, I put the next stage of my plan into action!" Link, hiding in the vents: "This should be good." Ganandorf: "I am going to run for mayor of Castletown!" Link: "Oh no, it's worse than I thought! He's not part of the mob; he's a politician!"

---

Impa: "In ancient times, the Sheika Tribe fought in the shadows, often employing throwing knives, or similarly concealable weapons." Link: "And now?" Impa: pulls out a high powered sniper rifle Impa: "This tends to do the job well."

---

Ganondorf, on tv: "If you elect me, I promise to do something about the vigilante that has been terrorising the streets of our fair city!" Link: "Wow, petty." Zelda: "How so?" Link: "Making my life difficult is literally one of the selling points of his campaign!" Zelda: "Does he know you're the vigilante?" Link: "He knows the vigilante is the Hero, so he's still being petty, even if I've kept my identity a secret."

---

Fi: "I calculate that there is a seventy-three point two-eight percent chance that this ends in disaster." Link: "That's still a twenty-six point seven-two percent chance that this goes well!" Fi: "Actually, the chances that this ends well are only four point-" Link, starting his motorbike: "CAN'T HEAR YOU! MOTORBIKING!!"

---

Aryll: "So... Link." Link: "Yeah?" Aryll: "If you die being a hero, can I have your PlayStation?" Link: "First off: I'm not going to die. And second off: Even if I did, I'd leave my stuff to Zelda, she actually respects me!" Aryll: "I respect you!" Link: "You tied my shoelaces together today!" Aryll: "...okay, fair point."

---

Zelda: "I'm just going to assume that Fi told you this would happen." Link, lying in hospital: "No. She said it might happen!" Fi: "Seventy-three point two-eight percent that it would happen, to be precise. I believe the appropriate phrase is: I told you so."

[sabertoothwalrus]

UHMMMMM what if T4T labru

[so-you-read-the-usernames]

Female characters who are the sole voice of reason <<<<<<< Female characters who think of themselves as the sole voice of reason but who are actually just as insane as those around them

[thesinglesock]

in a modern AU Link would be Zelda's only friend with a driver's license and their chat history would look like this

[professorcalculusstanaccount]

happy pride month! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🌈 Marlinspike Pride 2024

[marzipanandminutiae]

I hate "it's not trying to be accurate!" arguments for historical fiction or historically-inspired fantasy clothing choices that just. don't make sense logistically

why is that girl in Br*dgerton tightlacing her stays? what is she reducing- her upper ribcage? not only can you not tightlace in those (hand-bound eyelets can't usually take that strain, in my experience), but there's no reason to because your waistline is under your boobs. and unlike most of the series, they actually commit to the empire waistline for the court presentation gowns. small waists don't matter when NOBODY IS SEEING YOUR WAIST

why no chemise, in so many productions? fantasy/lack of concern for accuracy can't make things not chafe. chafing is not a matter of accuracy; it's a physical reality. did a wizard give everybody in the kingdom Anti-Chafing Spells?

just because you don't WANT a linen underlayer beneath a medieval tunic doesn't mean sweat won't get to outer garments and damage them- or make them need laundering, which weakens the fibers -at a time when all clothing is handmade, custom-fitted, and created from hand-woven fabrics and thus a HUGE investment

you're not just throwing accuracy to the winds as a design choice; you're ignoring How Textiles And Bodies And the Realities of Your Technology Level's Fabric and Laundering Capabilities Work

[noodles-and-tea]

Back at it with my enchanted merthur shenanigans

[uh-mxtx]

Modern-au Binghe who inherits Tianglang-jun’s massive fuck off mansion with like 4000 rooms after living on the streets/foster system after his adoptive mom died (idk i just need him to have big house) and he goes “what the hell am I supposed to do with this” and Meng mo (cant be a demon here ive decided he’s a weird homeless guy who gives him advice. That or a schizophrenic hallucination) goes “fill it with women” and binghe who knows he is gay goes “no”

But then he hears some girls complaining about the safety of some of the campus housing/thier boyfriend or parents kicked them out/ect and he’s like “well, i can fix that” and offers his mcmansion up as apartments. He’s loaded so he barely asks for rent and he just keeps inviting women in hard times, like his mother used to be.

But his real calling is cooking so he keeps feeding his tenants and asking what they like. He’s got a youtube cooking/home ec channel and they’re his taste testers. And they start inviting their freinds over like “hey wanna meet our big gay himbo landlord who feeds us” and their freinds are like “boy do I”

Binghe is absolutely gleefull about this. More people to feed. Fuck yeah he gets to be housewife. The gossip sessions are unmatched. He ends up making a full banquet every night and you can either show up in your pj’s or a ballgown to match the decor.

And eventually all this snowballs and hes got a whole sorority in his mcmansion. and they casually call him husband/boyfreind/sugar daddy as a joke bc Binghe is JACKED and they can get rid of men real fast if they pull their six foot seven guard dog out of the crowd. For the sign off/video end the taste testers on Binghe’s show kiss his cheeks as thanks. Binghe doesn’t know half the people in his house. Some girl he never met (came out of SHL’s room and is COVERED in hickeys) just smacked his ass and stole a stack of pancakes. He doesn’t even react he just makes more. This is the best for his touch starvation.

And oblivious people(you know who) dont realize most of them are lesbians using him as a beard, (ignoring the makeouts and pride flags in the background of some videos) and they absolutely believe Luo Binghe seduced a crowd of women into a harem by the power of cooking, cleaning, and great sex.

Cough cough, Shen Yuan

[gomzdrawfr]

PriceGhostWeek Day 5:

Possessive

[eriochromatic]

winter outing featuring cross guild and company 🌨️🌨️🌨️

[canisalbus]

✦ Hound mode ✦

[temeyes]

john "hip thrust" price

[laufeysan]

Helaena: Why are there little hand prints all over the wall?

Aegon, whispering to Jaehaera: Why are there little hand prints on the wall?

Jaehaera, whispering back: Because I have small hands!

Aegon: Because she has small hands.

[eurodynamic]

SIMON "GHOST" RILEY 💖✨💕 — gift for @simonghostrileys 🎁

[idiosyncraticrednebula]

The more "empowered" Disney tries to write their heroines as, the less interesting and charismatic they become, ironically.

[cfserkgk]

I imagine them to be a happy family in the modern AU where Fengxian and Lakan are married and Lahan and Maomao are their children. Fengxian would be strict but she very much dotes on her kids (just not as obviously as Lakan, but who can compare with Lakan).

I feel like Lakan would be a lawyer which would put his skills to use, whereas Fengxian would be an academic in mathematics, and of course they're both super good at xiangqi and go in different ways. (I'd like to think Fengxian taught Lahan a lot of maths when he was younger and that encouraged his love for the subject).