#‘reed richards? um who ����’

[wishchip106]

thinking about how when i first watched multiverse of madness and i saw Charles i went

“oh hey its that bald guy from xmen huh, was it professor x? no clue”

and then after becoming obsessed with xmen and i watched it again i went (when he was revealed)

“OMG ITS BABYGIRL HIIIIII 😻😻😻”

my priorities changed for sure

thinking about Erik in that world finding out his daughter (from another universe) killed his husband

damn 😔

we got live action banana chair

honestly, burn it

[hurtspideyparker]

Why do you love Peter Parker? Do you think he deserves to be happy? (I want him to but no pressure, I’m just curious about what you think)

Peter Parker the light of my life, the gold in the sky and the glimmer at night, my inspiration, my gem, the ache in my heart.

I love Peter because for one he is so nerdy and sarcastic. I adore how quick-witted he is; like obviously he's a genius in physics and chemistry (and just in general), but being able to come up with funny remarks and stabbing insults while in the middle of a fight genuinely makes him so intelligent. And also when he uses his intellect IN a fight, like with Dr. Strange and geometry in the mirror dimension. Don't get me started on comic book Peter because he's created technology worth billions and at times outsmarted Tony Stark, Reed Richards, Hank Pym... he's just insane. 

I also just adore how geeky and awkward he is. He may be an insanely cool and beloved superhero but he also stutters when he talks to girls, geeks over Star Wars, and builds computers for fun. Peter Parker has superhuman reflexes but will also trip over his own feet. It's just incredibly endearing.

Personally I like Tom Holland's Peter the most because of how young and goofy he is. I want to see him be awkward, weird, shy, young, stupid. I enjoy seeing the contrast of inexperience and extreme power he possesses when in battle. It also makes the angst more delicious because that's a literal baby who's just been stabbed, crushed, beaten and bruised. 

The sheer New York of him too. Accent, attitude, proud and polite. He is a friendly neighbourhood hero! He watches out for the little guy! I feel like it's not something we see with many heroes. They usually focus on the big issues and major villains, but Peter is willing to help old ladies cross the street or prevent muggings. It's really sweet and simple. And when New York repays the favour? Top tier!!! He is the people's princess <3. I love that for him it's all worth it- every single person, citizen, problem. It's worth his time. 

Then there's his morality and self-control. One thing about Peter is that he's insanely strong and deadly. He's constantly holding himself back because he doesn't want to kill anybody. So in every fight not only is he battling the sensory overwhelm and keeping track of his enemies attacks, but he's also remembering to hold back his punches and kicks. He's vocally anti-murder and that's always been a really strong theme for him. It's what makes the moments where he does consider murder so much heavier. If a man who's constantly performing self-control and actively choosing to not do harm is pushed so far as to end a life? Terrifying. Peter chooses good over and over again; he spares the villain, sides with redemption, finds the solution- he chooses peace. I enjoy that for all the joyful, sweet, and bright energy he brings, there's this deep rageful darkness within him. The moments it shines through really remind us of how much wrath and trauma he really possesses.

In every universe Peter loses the things he loves most and still somehow keeps moving forward, finds the courage to still be Spider-Man. I think it says a lot about him that he can be beaten and broken so many times and still come out virtuous. His optimism, that hunger and responsibility for good? Just unmatched. So eager to do what's right that it ends up being his hamartia. It's actually pretty beautiful. 

And at the end of the day, Peter Parker is selfless. The hurt, loss, risks. All he does is give and give to make sure others are safe. He'll give up his own opportunities and happiness for the greater good every single time. He's an absolute sweetheart who will never pick himself. That's why I love Peter Parker.

So do I think he DESERVES happiness? UM, NOBODY DESERVES IT MORE THAN HIM. He's done so much for everyone, he's more than earned some happiness in return. He deserves to be happy and healthy for the rest of his life, to be at MIT with his best friends, in love, to have parental figures that DON'T DIE. 

Now do I WANT him to be happy... let's just say he looks really pretty in red and blue.

I want my man bloody and bruised, red rimmed eyes and voice cracking over tears. He's my favourite person in the universe and unfortunately for him I love angst so... yes I want him happy so he can then be sad again >:). No but seriously he deserves to be happy but bro can not catch a break (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠)

[measuringbliss]

Spider-Man Read-Through BONUS: Marvel Team-Up 1 (#1-35)

So in my hurry to get through years I've already read, I completely dismissed Marvel Team-Up (1972), Spidey's first concurrent magazine, as something that wasn't worth reading. I may have been wrong, and I need to procrastinate, so here's a quick post where I skim through the issues I missed until now and show anything I find neat.

MASTERPOST

I actually expected the issues to be 100% Spidey and 0% Peter, but...

#1

Spidey_is_bisexual.jpeg

Johnny has a... particular outfit.

That's actually nice!

#2

Great composition.

My favorite kind of plot. Not the moeans, although that too, but "i know you're in there".

#3 features Morbius, and I'm sorry because Dracula is still much more interesting than Morbius to me. Oh well. The Human Torch interrupts one of Peter's classes, that's fun at least!

#4:

Ooooh I immediately recognize those Gil Kane lips...

That's a great scene, I miss that dynamic. I wish we saw more of Harry and Peter's cohabitation.

The Bugle publishes that Peter kidnapped a scientist, so Charles Xavier's on it! I'm really happy I listened to a bunch of episodes of that X-Men podcast because I'm absolutely not lost. It feels like I know these characters so well, hahaha.

...I will pretend this never happened and he kissed Scott instead, and consensually so. Yeah. That's a fun issue though, with the X-Men trying to save Spidey's life.

#5: Spidey gets a new roommate.

Conway didn't have quite the handle on how to write Harry, but that's fine.

The issue features the Puppet Master, and I'm pretty sure I read a recent issue with him and the Fantastic Four.

#6 features the gayest ad I've ever seen.

#7 features interesting stuff.

Notably, Peter soon reveals his secret identity to Thor! And we also see The Watcher as a cameo, nice.

In #8, the Cat (who later becomes Tigra) and Spider-Man team-up against "the Man-Killer", aka Katrina Luisia van Horn. Um.

This issue is alright at least, but it's clear what she's supposed to represent, and I found her quite sympathetic.

9 time! Peter's fagged out, which means, he's gay.

In 10, Peter drinks tea with Johnny.

#11 keeps the time travel plot going. (18)

In #12, Peter wants to get over Gwen's death. We also learn he loves cheeseburger and milk.

In #13, Peter's still not fine.

#14 is about fighting Namor.

#15 features Ghost Rider and the Orb (great designs!) and Peter and MJ on a date.

Like this is great.

In #16, Peter mentions he goes so rarely to the movies he wouldn't be able to differentiate Clint Eastwood from Linda Lovelace, who's a porn actress. Silly writers! Now I want to meta about that tidbit, but I don't have the time. (Note to self: watch Linda Lovelace flicks)

This is actually fascinating.

#17 features Reed Richards. #18 doesn't feature Spidey. In #19 and #20, Spidey's back to the Savage Land... However, MJ inquires about Pete's disappearance! And she features prominently.

#21 features Dr Strange! And #22 Hawkeye! And #23 Iceman and the Human Torch! I briefly discussed that one here, as it's linked to the incredible Giant-Size Spider-Man #1. In #24, there voodoo and buff men.

#25 features Daredevil though! They do the basic and overdone thing of "two heroes fighting for no good reason when they could just talk, and then they fight together". #26 features the Torch and Thor!

In #27, we see the Chameleon!

He's just like me for real.

#28 features another one of Pete's professors. See, that's the worldbuilding I'm after!

In #29, Iron Man pays us a visit.

Oh no, he's hot.

In #30, Gloria Grant (Peter's acquaintance who lives in the same building) is here. We learn about Gloria's family, and she contacts Sam Wilson, who's a friend of a friend. I'm glad to finally see a bit of her life, even if it doesn't last.

#31 features Iron Fist. He has fun with Spidey, then it ends with Peter recording everything that happens to not forget... but he forgets. Hmm, wonder if that will come back later. #32 features the Fantastic Four. #33 features Night Hawk. #34 features Valkyrie! And, finally, #35 features... not Spider-Man. Alright, we're done! I'm not sad that I skipped all of that earlier, it's not really my thing, but I'm glad I skimmed through all that, there was some neat stuff.

See you next time, dear readers!

[takkotito-arts]

FireSoup References

Ramy - She/Her || 23 y.o. || 5’4’’/162cm

Ramy is a chill gal with a bit of a punk side, she prefers to live life at her own pace and also hates her current job. Ramy aims to enter a prestigious art school, but her family has different plans for her, so she escaped home and is now living in Mixco City.

She’s now the newest member of the Hero Burger staff, a small american-style restaurant new in the city. Her boss told her to become a superhero as a publicity stunt, but she’s just doing it to keep the local mafia away from the zone.

Inspirations: 

Helen Parr, Um Jammer Lammy, Lapis Lazuli (Visual, Personality)

Asui Tsuyu, Battletoads, Reed Richards (Theme, Powers)

Noodles || Superhero alias

The press doesn’t know much about this new persona going around, but she seems to show up when the mafia tries to get protection racket from small businesses in the southern part of the city. 

Superpowers: Described as Amphibian-like

Elastabody: Her body is unnaturally flexible, somehow able to deform and stretch its form and apparently function like normal internally. Her current shown limit is stretching 15 meters.

Spring-Loaded: Her muscles seem to posses an ability to compress and quickly release the energy, using this she can jump extremely high.

Poison-resistance: Seems to have a high tolerance to several types of poisonous substances, she also doesn’t seem to get easily drunk.

Wall-climbing: She’s able to easily stick to almost any kind of surface allowing her to climb along walls.

Extra: Ramy was born with these powers but they were pretty subdued until she grew up to an adult, she’s unregistered so she has to keep them a secret.

Frida Reyes - She/Her || 22 y.o. || 5’6’’/168cm

Frida is a kind and energetic young lady from Mixco City, currently studying at the local University. She doesn’t know yet what to make of her life, but she likes helping out at her dad’s car workshop and driving on her motorcycle to make deliveries. She's really close to her family and would do anything to protect them.

Inspirations:

Atsuko Kagari, Hilda(Pokemon BW), Doremi Harukaze (Personality)

Sakura Kasugano, Cutie Honey, Shantae (Visual)

Bowser, Charizard, Kamen Rider/Sentai (Powers)

The Fire Dragon || Firedra || Superhero Aliases

A very powerful display of powers but with the grace of a box of shoes, this hero calls herself “The Fire Dragon”. Her collateral damage is too much to justify most of her cases, the mayor has already set out to do something about this.

Superpowers: Described as Draconic

Super-Strength: Strong enough to lift a whole bus with ease, but next time she should make sure it’s empty.

Fire-Breathing: Self-explanatory, the fire fighting department has some issues with this.

Body-Ignition: She can cover her body in flames as well, without suffering any harm from the heat.

Razor-sharp claws: Somehow able to cut through metal.

Enhanced stamina: Definitely superior to a normal human’s.

Extra: Unknown to most of the public, Frida’s powers aren’t something she was born with, instead she uses the golden stone in her belt buckle to summon an ancient dragon’s power and transform into the Fire Dragon persona for a limited time.

Bett Bunsen || She/Her

Miss Bett is a sweet and caring person who likes to joke around when she’s in a good mood, she has a very firm business side, and won’t let others take advantage of the people she cares for. Bett loves cooking, her favorite food is tangerines, and she loves the local beer and margaritas. In her free time she likes to play videogames, even carrying around a portable console for when she’s bored at the restaurant.

A restaurant owner and American beauty, Miss Bett is a terrible boss to be around with, but she’s a good business-lady. Thanks to her help Ramy was able to find a place to stay, and even got offered a job.

[secretswiftymarvelfan]

Keeping you warm this Christmas - Johnny Storm x Reader

A/N: This is for @wiypt-writes​​ 25 days of Chris-mas! Day 5! dividers made by @firefly-graphics​

Summary: Johnny convinces you to go to the annual Christmas party.

Word Count: 3.1k 

Warnings: Anxiety, Panic Attacks, Fluff

Masterlist

You landed the job at Reed Richard’s lab shortly after the incident that causes the 4 of them to gain their powers. With the four of them being busy being superheroes and saving lives Reed wanted someone to watch over the lab and run the experiments while he was away.

That’s where you came in.

It was a job that suited you perfectly, the majority of the time it was only you and Reed in the lab. You were extremely introverted, preferring to work and be alone, feeling safer in your own company.

You had initially been very nervous to work for a group of superheroes. So much so you barely slept leading up to the first day. Panicking internally to the point that you felt physically sick and almost called to say you couldn’t do it. But you didn’t, you forced yourself in and you never regretted it.

The fantastic four had become good friends of yours, especially Susan. You were so close you felt comfortable enough to tell her about your anxiety and panic attacks, something only your parents knew about. She was incredibly supportive and would always make sure you were feeling okay. Ensuring her loud brother wasn’t bothering you.

Not that Johnny could ever bother you, you liked him far too much for that to ever happen. He was your complete opposite and on paper you really should hate him, but you didn’t. You had the biggest most helpless crush on the human torch. He was one of the few things that could distract you from your work, which happened far too often.

You were sat looking at some samples under a microscope when you heard Susan and Johnny walk into the lab.

“Oh come on” Johnny complained as he followed after Susan.

“No Johnny it’s a bad idea” Susan sighs as she walks over to Reed.

“How do you know, have you even asked her?” Johnny questions.

“No but I-“ Susan starts but Johnny interrupts.

“That settles it, I’m asking her” Johnny states.

You had been listening into the conversation as you worked but never looked up from the microscope. That was until you heard Johnny sit down in the chair next to you leaning back smiling at you.

“Can I help you?” You ask glancing over at me.

“Yes you can, I’m glad you asked” Johnny asks tapping your arm making you raise a brow and glance over at Susan who was giving you an apologetic look.

“We are having our annual Christmas party and I want you to come this year, especially since you didn’t make it last year” Johnny tells you.

You feel your mouth go dry and your throat tighten just at the mention of going to a party with a million people you didn’t know.

“I- I don’t know” you stutter looking down at you nervously fidgeting fingers.

“Oh c’mon it’ll be fun, I bet you’re secretly the life of the party” Johnny says with a playful grin.

“Johnny! Y/N ignore him, you don’t have to come if you don’t have to” Susan tells you reassuringly.

“Um I’ll think about it” you say quietly as you turn back to your work.

“That’s good enough for me, I’ll see you later” Johnny smiles before jumping up from his seat and sauntering out of the labs.

“You really don’t have to go if you’re not comfortable, he’ll be too busy flirting with whatever models he invited to notice if you were there or not” Susan tells you moving to sit in the seat that was previously occupied by Johnny.

You try and force a small smile trying to not feel hurt by her saying that the guy who you had a hopeless crush on wouldn’t even notice your presence or lack thereof. Even if it was painfully true.

“I know, but I guess it could be fun, I’ll think about it and see how I feel closer to the time” you say shrugging your shoulders.

“Well, if you do decide to come you can hang with me all night, and if you wanna go because it gets too much we’ll go okay?” Susan tells you with a gentle smile.

“Thank you, I’ll um take that into consideration” you thank her.

You had gone back and forth for days trying to make a decision as to whether you were going to the party. It only got worse the closer to the party.

You were sat on the edge of your bed staring at the dress that was hanging up. It was now or never, you needed to decide whether you were going to this party or not.

Maybe it would be different, maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as you thought. You didn’t live too far away from the Baxter Building, you could always leave if you decided you didn’t want to be there anymore.

Plus it would be nice to actually experience the stories the four were always telling. You had always felt a little left out since you never saw them outside of work. Also the possibility to spend time with Johnny was an opportunity you didn’t want to pass up.

Taking a deep breath you pushed yourself up from your bed and grabbed your dress. You slipped on the deep red crushed velvet pencil dress, walking over to the mirror and smoothing it down. You then put on your makeup, keeping it more or less natural. Finishing the look with a deep red lipstick that matched the dress.

As you left your apartment you texted Susan to let her know you were on your way. You smiles to yourself when you see her excited responds, telling you that she’d meet you at the entrance. There was no turning back now, you just hoped it wouldn’t be a disaster.

“Oh my gosh you look amazing! Red really suits you” Susan smiles hugging you.

“Thank you, thought it was appropriate” you smile bashfully.

“C’mon let’s get inside and get you a glass of wine or something” Susan says linking her arm with yours and leading you into the party.

Stepping inside you had to take a shaky breath when you saw exactly how many people were there. Susan led you through the bustling crowd to the bar, as you went you could feel people bumping into you and you were already starting to regret coming.

Thankfully the bar wasn’t too crowded so you could take a moment to get your nerves under control. A glass of wine being passed to you greatly helping.

“Hello ladies” Reed smiled kissing Susan on the cheek.

“Hi Reed” you smile greeting him.

“I’m glad you were able to make it, Johnny would not stop going on about getting you to come” Reed chuckles shaking his head gently as he took a sip of his drink.

“Really? Why- why would he do that?” You say stuttering slightly.

“Dunno I’ve spent years trying to work out what goes on in that meatballs head” Susan laughs shaking her head.

You nervously chuckle along with the two of them. Your mind running a million miles a minute trying not to work out why Johnny was so determined to get you to this party. Was there a possibility that maybe your hopeless crush wasn’t so hopeless?

“Speaking of the devil” Reed mutters glancing over your shoulder.

You looked over your shoulder to see Johnny walking over. Initially you were excited to see him, but your hopes were dashed when you saw he had his arm around a gorgeous woman.

“Hey you made it!” Johnny exclaimed when he saw you.

“Yeah” you smile awkwardly.

“Who’s your friend Johnny?” Reed asks nodding to the blonde by Johnny’s side.

“Oh, this is Cynthia” Johnny smiles gesturing to the woman.

“Caroline” she scoffs shoving him as she walks away.

“Shit…” Johnny curses watching as Caroline walks away.

“Nice one johnny” Susan says rolling her eyes at him.

“Meh she was a bit of a bore, I have backups” Johnny smirks shrugging his shoulders.

“Classy” Reed comments shaking his head.

“Hey, hey not all of us are with the love of our life, just be lucky I let you have my sister” Johnny defends gesturing to his sister.

“You had no say Johnny” Susan says shaking her head.

“That you know off” Johnny winks sending a smirk your way.

“Anyway, I’m gonna love you and leave you, great to have you here, save me a dance” Johnny smiles looking over at you.

“Um yeah sure” you say nodding your head hopefully not too enthusiastically.

“Great, see you later, I gotta go find um…. Meghan?” Johnny says thinking out loud.

“Maybe go find out before you find her” Reed suggests.

“Nah it’s all part of the charm” Johnny says winking at you before disappearing into the party.

As the party went on you could not only feel your social battery running out, but your anxiety beginning to rise. You thought maybe drinking some more would make you feel calmer, liquid courage and all that, but nope it made it worse.

Much, much worse.

You thought it couldn’t get any worse but when you were walking back from the bathroom, you couldn’t find Susan anywhere. The more you looked the more you bumped into people and the more it felt like the world was closing in on you.

You heart-rate skyrocketing and your stomach flipped. It felt like you had something say on your chest and you couldn’t breath. You once more bumped into someone but when you glanced around you saw the door to the balcony.

You instantly dashed over and out the door briefly hearing someone shouting as you go. You ran to the edge gripping onto the railing for dear life as the panic attack set in. You tried to breathe but you couldn’t, feeling like you were about the vomit at any moment. You were just grateful that you were the only one out here.

“Hey, you okay?” You heard someone say as they put their hand on your back.

You instantly flinch turning to face whoever it was. Surprised and embarrassed that it was Johnny who was looking at you with furrowed brows.

“Whoa, hey it’s okay only me, take deep breaths in and out” Johnny says putting his hands on your shoulders.

“I-I can’t” you gasp shaking your head.

“You can, come on like this” he says squeezing your shoulders, demonstrating how he wanted you to breath.

Your eyes find his and you find yourself following his lead. Taking deep breaths along with him. He doesn’t stop until your breathing had returned to normal. Your body now shaking from the rush of adrenaline and the cold.

“C’mere you’re shivering” he sighs gently, pulling you into his embrace.

You bury your head in his chest as he wrapped his arm around you tightly. He used his powers to warm you back up until you stopped shaking.

“I’m sorry” you mutter shaking your head as you pull away slightly.

“Don’t apologise, it’s fine” he tells you, cupping your cheek as he wiped away your tears.

“You okay now?” He asks rubbing your back.

“Yeah, thank you” you sniffle wiping away the last of your tears.

“C’mon you’re gonna be tired, let’s get you home” Johnny says shrugging off his jacket and placing it over your shoulders before taking your hand and leading you out.

Thankfully he took you a secluded way out of the party and the building. Stepping outside you expected Johnny to drop your hand, but he didn’t.

“Have you had panic attacks before?” Johnny asks after a moment of silence.

“Yeah, but it’s been a while, I um don’t like crowds and all that” you admit looking down at the ground in embarrassment.

“Why did you come to the party? If you don’t like crowds?” He asks looking over at you.

“I dunno, thought it would be fun, that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, and I didn’t want you to think I was lame” you explain glancing up at him nervously.

“I don’t think you’re lame, and I wouldn’t have if you didn’t come, if I had known I wouldn’t have been so persistent so I’m sorry it’s all my fault” Johnny apologises shaking his head.

“No, its not, I should know my limits and shouldn’t have pushed them” you tell him.

“Stop apologising, it was out of your control, and you had fun beforehand right?” Johnny points out.

“Yeah it was nice” you admit with a small smile.

“Exactly so it’s not a day wasted, how you feeling now?” He asks smiling down at you.

“Much better thank you, how did you know what to do?” You ask him looking up at him.

“I um had panic attacks as a kid” he explains scratching the back on his neck.

“Really? But you’re so confident and the most extroverted guy I know, the exact opposite of lame old me” you say surprised.

“Stop calling yourself lame, you are not lame” Johnny says pulling you to a stop and turning to face you.

“And I haven’t always been this way, I was the super nerdy kid at school who was obsessed with space, I wasn’t cool or anything, kids used to pick on me a lot and no parents thing didn’t help, Sue helped me get through it” Johnny explains glancing down slightly.

“I had no clue” you mutter gently.

“It’s fine, I’m sure you know it isn’t easy talking about it, but I trust you” he shrugs with a gentle smile.

“I trust you too” you smile up at him.

Johnny gives you a warm smile before turning and leading you back to your apartment, squeezing your hand gently as he walked. Far too soon you arrived at your apartment building, the both of you slowing to a stop outside it. As you turned to face Johnny you realised that you really didn’t want him to go just yet.

“Do you wanna come in for a drink? Coffee or something? Unless you wanna head back to the party or something” you blurt out quickly.

A lopsided grin grows on Johnny’s face as he nodded “yeah a coffee sounds great, lead the way” he smiles gesturing for you to go first.

Once inside your apartment you made your way into the small kitchen to make yourself and Johnny a cup of coffee. Johnny keeping himself occupied by having a look around. As you walked back out you found him looking at a photo on the bookshelf.

“This a trip of the Smithsonian?” He asks pointing to it.

“Yeah, my parents took me for my 8th birthday” you say smiling at the photo of 8-year-old you stood in front of one of the rockets, smiling proudly as if you were the one who made it.

“Have you ever wanted to go up to space?” Johnny asks as you pass him his coffee.

“I guess, I dunno really” you admit shrugging your shoulders as you move to sit down on the couch.

“Well my last trip was pretty dramatic so I might not be the best advertisement for it” Johnny chuckles as he sits down next to you.

“No, but something pretty cool came out of it though” you point out making him laugh.

“Something pretty hot too” Johnny smirks making you snort with laughter and roll your eyes at him.

“Seriously how are you so confident?” You ask him.

“I dunno guess I just faked it until I made it, probably helped that I was smoking hot before I got these powers” Johnny joked making his fingers catch fire.

“But in all seriousness, confidence will come at some point. I’ve seen you in the labs, you practically run the place you’re so confident” Johnny points out his hand gently brushing against your knee.

“That’s different” you sigh shaking your head.

“Not really, it’s still confidence at the end of that day, you just gotta apply that to other situations, or lean on other confident people to give you a boost” Johnny suggests.

“What like you?” You ask raising a brow.

“If you want yeah” Johnny smiles warmly.

Silence falls between the two of you. You wrap your fingers around your mug more as you take a couple of sips so you’d have the excuse not to say anything.

“How you feeling now?” Johnny asks after a moment.

“Good, a little disappointed that I went to all this effort and I was only there for a couple hours” you sighs gesturing down to your dress.

“Well… the night is still young, and I believe you owe me a dance” Johnny smiles taking your mug from you and setting it down on the coffee table.

You watch in confusion as he stands up and holds out his hand for you. Without thinking you place your hand in his and let him pull you up from the couch. He then leads you to a spot with more room before pulling you closer, placing a hand on your hip. Despite the lack of music Johnny begins to sway back and forth, humming gently as he did so.

“Did I tell you that you look beautiful?” He asks quietly.

You look up at him eyes wide with surprise, unable to say anything except shake your head.

“Well you do, red is a great colour on you, happens to be my favourite too” Johnny comments glancing down at your dress before his eyes find yours again.

“Um- I” you stutter.

“Not that you don’t look beautiful when you’re working away in your lab coat” Johnny continues leaving you completely stunned into silence.

“I know Reed probably finds it really annoying but I love stopping by the lab to see you” He explains.

“You come to see me?” You mutter in disbelief.

“Yeah, who else?” He smiles as if it was obvious.

“Johnny I- what- what’s going on?” You stutter.

“Well from where I’m standing, I can see a guy dancing and talking with the prettiest girl in Manhattan, tell her how much he like her, hoping she feels the same way and that he’ll get to kiss her” Johnny says with a small grin that left you speechless.

“But we’re so different” you whisper.

“Opposites attract?” Johnny offers making you chuckle gently.

“So whatcha say? Is this guy gonna get to kiss the girl?” He asks tilting his head in question.

“Yeah” you breath out nodding your head in case you were too quiet.

Johnny smiles down at you warmly before bringing his hand to your cheek and guiding your lips to his. You practically melted into the kiss, hands moving to rest on his chest clutching onto the lapels of his suit.

“You okay?” He asks resting his forehead against your.

“Perfect” you smile bringing hand to the nape of his neck to pull his lips back to yours.

Day 12: Jake Jensen

Masterlist

PLEASE LIKE FOLLOW AND REBLOG (it can be your christmas present to me....)

Also just between you and me... I totally wanna write more Johnny following this.....

[gavinisqueer]

Okay so I had this idea on the way to the gym yesterday

Basically it's about angel Nines who's spending some time on Earth. He's a low rank angel so he only gets to go once every year or less, he could rise through the ranks if he wanted but the next stage is guardian angel and he's not interested in following a random human around.

Except! When one time he ducks into an alley out of sight so he can fly back to heaven bc his time is up, but before he can unfurl his wings there's someone pressing a knife to his back and demanding money.

(This part is def stolen from something but I don't remember what)

Nines realizes that the person is just some kid down on his luck, so he makes an offer, says he'll buy the knife. So it's all legal and shit, no crime, he's just buying a cool knife. Manifests $100 and trades it. And the guy runs off, leaving him to make his way back in peace.

Weird, he'd thought he'd already gone invisible when the guy saw him.

-

A few years later, he's back on Earth. Technically, he's supposed to be doing good deeds while he's here, but that's never been a skill of his, so instead he's spending the night at a bar.

It's a complete coincidence when someone taps his shoulder, and he turns to find himself staring at the same kid as on his last visit - though not so much of a kid now.

(Cw prostitution)

After buying the man a drink, at his request, Nines learns that he's gone from a life of crime to one of... Well, still crime, but a victimless one. Not anything heaven concerns itself with, so that's fine. Of course, he doesn't partake himself, so he has to decline, and the man leaves to search for another client.

On his way out at the end of the night, quickly sobering - damn his supernatural metabolism - Nines happens to see the man again. Only this time, he's not alone. Nines listens in to the conversation between the human he's been running in with and another man who, the angel realises, must be his pimp. Apparently, he's been unsuccessful in finding a client, because he's getting chewed out something fierce. It's when the man is grabbed by his shirt, the pimp spitting out threats, that Nines chooses to reveal himself.

"Um, excuse me?" He calls, frowning when both men look over at him. Sticking his hand into his pocket, he pulls out a handful of bills that weren't there a few seconds before. "I said I would get the money. I hope you haven't found yourself a new customer in my absence."

The pimp calms down after that, eagerly accepting his money and letting Nines take his human to a little motel nearby. When they arrive, he's quick to turn down the man's advances. "The room is paid for the night," he says, "please take advantage of it and rest."

He tries to leave, but things can never be so simple with humans. "Who the fuck *are* you?"

"Is it not enough to believe that I am just a good Samaritan?"

"Nobody pays $200 plus a hotel room just to not get their dick sucked." Squinting, he asks, "Do I know you or somethin'?"

Nines forgets how quick to forget humans are, their memories fading after only a few years. "Not that I know of," he says, and then offers the name he gives out to humans, "I'm Richard. Stern." He holds out his hand, because that is Polite.

The human looks him over, before slowly taking his hand to shake. "Gavin. Reed."

Eventually, Nines is able to get out the door. Gavin seems too reluctant to press the point further, in case the warm room is taken away from him.

In his last few hours on the mortal plane, Nines pulls some strings. By morning, the Detroit police will have found they have all the information they need to arrest the man who threatened Gavin - for unrelated crimes, so as not to hurt Nines' human or any others he has under his thumb.

As he returns to heaven along with the rest of his brethren, he wonders at the name he'd been given. How peculiar, that he would offer his given name so easily in the same breath that he lied about his surname.

-

It's some time later when Nines is summoned for a trip to Earth again. There's been rumours of a plan brewing among the demons, and with it being Halloween, a day that demonic presence is much more powerful than normal, they want as many angels on the ground as they can get.

Nines does not join them in searching out demons to drive away. Instead, he looks for the human he has gained an interest in. He's pleasantly surprised to find him located in a house, in a nice neighborhood. Invisible to the human eye, he flies above the streets, watching children run back and forth between houses to collect their treats. When he gets to Gavin's home, he waits, and it's not long before someone comes to knock on the door.

If Nines had need to breathe, he surely would have choked when Gavin opened the door. The man stood in the doorway, fangs sticking out past his lips as he grinned and handed out a handful of candy to the young boy who presented his Halloween bag. Small, black horns erupted from the man's temples, and a viciously tipped tail swished behind him like it had a mind of its own. The biggest give away of all, doing away with the possibility of a particularly accurate costume, was the aura of Malice that surrounded him, an energy that was almost tangible to the angel.

This was no human taking part in the holiday, but undoubtedly, a demon.

As Nines hung in the air, frozen in shock, Gavin's gaze drifted up, and he, too, froze, as they locked eyes.

-

SO that's all I have blocked out in detail but what happens next is Nines confronting Gavin, where he learns that he's actually a half-demon, abandoned by his demon mother and sent to a religious institution by his human father. The priests thought he was possessed so he underwent a lot of abuse, so eventually he ran away. Because he's a halfbreed his demonic form only comes out a few times a year - luckily Halloween is one of them, because it's the only day he doesn't have to hide away until he's back to normal.

And then. Nines accidentally overstays. Which means he, too, loses his powers when his portal to heaven closes, and he's stuck on earth as a human until someone comes to rescue him - which, given how angels view time compared to humans, means he'll be there for at least a few years.

[juniaships]

Vesta Lewis but it's the spiderman movies

My OC (technical si) Vesta Lewis as she would appear in the three cinematic versions of Spider Man

2002 Spider-Man

- Known as the weird kid in school who rarely speaks and didn't give an absolute shit what anyone said about her

- Had no real direction in life after school so she got a job working delivery

- She and MJ are kinda friends; especially in the same theatre class

- Second movie she's still struggling with her hero career

- Spends time with Harry out of pity for his father's death

- Works rival pizzeria; she and Peter really bond over how equally difficult their jobs are

- She gets kidnapped this time instead of MJ bc I always felt bad for her since it damaged her rep

- I guess in the final battel she conjures up an illusion of Doc Ock's dead wife as a visual reminder of the man he once was

- Afterwards Vesta heals him so he survives yay

- Third movie

- Venom pays a visit she is TRAUMATIZED

- She goes to investigate and with the help of Reed Richards determines to be an alien symbiote and tries to save Peter

- They have relationship problems

- She gets a visit by Goblin!Harry but she actually fights him off but he threatens her family's safety so she's forced to stand down

- Symbiote kidnaps Gwen and in the foray Vesta manages to convince Harry to help them fight

2012 The Amazing Spiderman

- She and Peter are rivals this time

- Especially since he's better at science than her and she sucks XD

- Um she fights the lizard by herself and almost DIES

- LOVE TRIANGLE involving her Harry and Peter

- 2014 movie she is the one to work at Daily Planet while Peter gets the job at OSCORP

- During all this their romantic feelings come to light and they can no longer hide it

- Harry is PISSED

- At the end Harry is the one to kidnap her (because she intervenes to save Gwen) and *spoilers* she is the one who dies

- Peter is heartbroken; Gwen moves to England to get away from NY for a while

- MCU (aka my self indulgent version that does away with Endgame and Infinity War and dissed knee stink)

- She meets Peter in a meet cute sort of way during CV (even tho i hate that story)

- She attends a different school; but hangs out with the main trio after hours

- They don't know each other's identities; close calls become something of a running gag

- In Far From Home she goes to Europe with the midtown class not bc of school but because of a supposed lost magical artifact

- She and Peter grow really closer to the point EVERYONE makes memes about it

- DRAMA BOMB

- In this AU all the heroes who got snapped in canon are the ones to survive; so this makes Sam Wilson Captain America early; Yelena coming to avenge Natasha, Sharon never turns evil yadda yadda

- Both Peter and Vesta survive the Snap; giving them a chance to grow up into adult heroes

- So the events of NWH happens differently sort of

- Peter is in college, Michelle is pursuing acting and Ned Ganke-Leeds is studying magic under Wong as "Hobgoblin."

- Vesta works taking care of orphans of the Snap

- Both go with the New Avengers to stop Thanos

- Time is restored but the five years aren't reversed; soooooo THINGS HAPPEN

- Peter and Vesta start dating and everything is going well

- at one point loses her powers and gets attacked by Raimi!Goblin

- Ned: Come on Goblin's already taken?! >:(

- But gets saved by a mysterious person....

- ...A mysterious person in a blue silver and grey suit...

- Who calls herself WOLF SPIDER

- aka VESTA FROM THE TASM VERSE

- Turns out when she died she was given a second chance by one of the Eternals for her sacrifice; but she couldn't go back to her hone universe until her duties are done

- TASM!Peter is shocked to see his dead girlfriend breathing and standing in front of him

- TASM!Vesta says she'll explain everything to him in private

- Also Raimi!Vesta and Peter have triplets: Ben, Serena May, and Stanley (get it Stan Lee)

- It ends with Dr. Strange recruiting Wolf Spider to help him stop Scarlet Bitch; she bids goodbye to her counters and goes off

- But not before sharing one last kiss with her world's Peter and promising him she'll be home by Hanukkah :)

[brw]

Tony Stark and Reed Richards for the character ask thing

TONY STARK

how i feel about this character: 😬 ngl i... don't care for him. at all. i don't vehemently hate him, there's definitely times where i appreciate him & his personality but it's few and far between and i... genuinely do not get the hype. i think its mostly mcu fans' fault for my dislike, its just he's fucking EVERYWHERE now, it's impossible to miss him? like he plays a big role in EVERY avengers comic now, he gets ongoing titles all the time, and it's just so frustrating especially when you consider characters who used to be more or less on the same level on them (like hank pym! who, by the way, has been dead for 6 consecutive years! that would never happen with tony!) or even more popular than him now get streamlined because of the mcu's popularity. by himself, i don't really mind him that much, but with how famous he is now and how large and frankly annoying his fan base is i just... now really do not like the character.

all the people i ship romantically with this character: short list here; reed, because i find their dymanic of reed as someone who does everything for his family and will do everything and anything he can to protect their interests above everyone else but also wants to keep his hands clean and believes, genuinely, in the good of the world, and tony as someone who will do horrendous things in the name of the greater good who always has the bigger picture in mind interesting. i also don't know a lot about it but he seems cute with rhodey? even if i think rhodey deserves a bigger chance to be his own character away from tony as is sometimes denied i can always appreciate a good best friends to lovers dymanic :)

my non romantic otp for this character: um? i honestly don't know 😭 i don't like him enough to say, i guess him n reed again? him n rhodey again? help 😭😭😭

my unpopular opinion of this character: he does not deserve the fame he has. like, i dont mean to sound jealous or whatever but pre 2007 movie he was not the most well liked character or even that popular. like obviously he had fans because he had solo series on and off for a very long time but it just feels SO ridiculous that tony stark has a bigger fandom than the fucking fantastic four. THE FANTASTIC FOUR. marvel's first superhero team, and yet??? like okay. he might have things to offer i don't see. he obviously does, i mean, he got three movies and multiple solo series. but he has most certainly not got enough as a character to overshadow the fantastic four, the x-men, etc and i will never forgive the mcu & mcu fans (and mark miller, he deserves blame too) for making it so. again, by himself he's fine but it is ridiculous to me that a one note white character that appeared in his third film (harley keener or... whatever) has 2000s more fics than THE PROTAGONIST OF INTO THE SPIDERVERSE, MILES MORALES. it is just... so vile and frustrating to me.

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: he didn't exist <3 jk jk um i'm not sure? i guess it would be funny if he was like... stick thin underneath the armour. like idk. he's in the armour 24/7 it makes sense to me for him to be a skinny little nerd under there. like completely fucking small. like you can't be a superhero AND be a billionaire and avoid all those taxes AND run the avengers AND run multiple massive corporations and still work out... even if you take away eating and sleeping there's just not enough time... it would be funny if he was just a tiny little boy underneath all that djndndbf

my otp: gonna say him and rhodey again. like i say, can never resist a good best friends to lovers dymanic.

my cross over ship: jdjshdhdh literally none i don't think about him enough to consider it <3

headcanon fact: 100% think he was the one to offer reed that money to star in a p*rno it's just so funny to me to imagine dhsnndnd

REED RICHARDS

how i feel about this character: HE'S MY BOY! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH! like i guess it's paradoxical considering how similar he is to tony in some ways but man i just love reed so much. i so genuinely think reed richards is what tony stark fans want him to be. like they (mcu fans) make up elaborate headcanons of him being a good dad and an ethical billionaire and its like no that's reed richards? canonically he's gone broke bc he refuses to get money off his inventions... u have the wrong man... anyway he's also an asexual LEGEND i do not take criticism and ofc. autistic icon. literally he's so autistic it makes me <3 i love him dearly.

all the people i ship romantically with this character: it would be easier to list the people i DON'T ship with him lol. sue, obviously, victor ofc, and ben are the big ones, but i just LOVE his dymanic with t'challa and i think they would rlly work it... i also love the idea of him with namor, idk with victor it's just so funny to imagine reed as like. bizarrely attractive to rulers of foreign countries. blackagar faces the same problem <3 i also do believe him n hank pym dated in college for a bit... all their weird little microaggressions towards each other just makes me feel that way... again i do like him w/ tony and i made this weird au where he and emma frost got together which if prompted i WILL talk about. probably. more but yeah <3

my non romantic otp for this character: while i do LOVE them together as lovers i just love. benreed generally <3 like they're LITERALLY besties they love each other sm and i'm tired of pretending they don't????? so many people ignore this relationship and it makes me so sad!!! they're best friends they love each other fight for each other fight with each other theyre literally besties... smh put some respect on the benreed name 😤

my unpopular opinion of this character: i don't think this is that unpopular but it is in certain circles so! i genuinely think reed is the best marvel dad! like you can talk abt others all u want but the fact is that reed is the only character i can think of who has always been there in his kid's lives and has consistently put their needs first. like not saying other characters are bad but even at his worst writing he's always done his best for his kids and certainly has been full of love for them. other characters at their worse have. murdered their own kids <3 genuinely he's the best marvel dad and sure there's not a lot of competition but. yeah <3

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character: I WANT A CANONICAL AUTISM DIAGNOSIS NOW. literally he is SO autistic & there are... no big autistic marvel characters! at all! literally none! the closest we have is legion (who was written in an incredible ableist way and autism hasnt been used to describe him in a solid 30 years) and monet (and it turned out it wasn't monet but one of her twin sisters impersonating her :/) so it would just mean so much to see a canonically autistic character like reed who is older & has a wife and kids who he loves and who they love in return on panel. like so much of the rep we DO have is like, young kids or teens and idk an autistic adult would just mean so much to me. especially one like reed who is as selfless & loving as he is.

my otp: tie between doomreed and reedsue! any option that gets this noodle nerd lots of love i'm good for tbh

my cross over ship: him and ralph dibney from dc should date... they have so much in common... stretchy autistic man who's very smart and kind of silly who loves his wife sue who pegs him 🥴 they'd have so much to talk about sjbdhdhd also imagining the look on ben's face realising there's TWO of them is. so funny.

headcanon fact: he's aromantic he's asexual and neither of these stop him from his very meaningful & passionate relationship with his wife :)

assorted character ask game!

[welcome-to-latveria]

I think the thing is the MCU started at a time when superhero movies were beginning to dominate the zeitgeist but hadn't fully taken over yet PLUS because of the 90s bankruptcy Marvel didn't have any of their biggest heroes so had to start off with people like Cap, Thor, and Iron Man who weren't complete unknowns to the general public like GOTG but still not as well known as like Spider-Man or the X-Men (1/?)

Plus while often still doing their own thing, those early films did crib a lot from 616 & 1610 and are more comic-adjacent than some later stuff. Cap 1 & IM1 is a good updating of their classic origin while keeling the basic beats. Some parts of TWS are just lifted straight from Brubaker. Joss Whedon is a creep but like his whole shtick is that kind of comicy fanboyism plus he actually wrote for Marvel comics, so the first Avengers manages to capture some of that comics spirit without being a direct adaptation (2/?)

So like I think for a lot of people who came on board later, there was this in-built audience of people who WERE comic book fans and who legitimately DID speculate about the future and what other characters could appear based on rights etc, so people came into that fandom landscape and just kind of learned "being a Marvel fan = wildly speculate Mephisto is in everything" because they just saw the outcome but not the process. So now they get hype for cameos by characters they haven't read but they know come from the comics and by being hype they will be a Real Fan (3/3)

Yeah I think this is an accurate summary of why they get excited about cameos but also lots of these fans say stuff about the character with their whole chest out and they've never once read a comic. They be like 'Reed Richards is so evil!!! Why do we keep pretending he's a hero' um because I actually have read comics with him in that's why 😭

[themonkeycabal]

Wandavision Ep 6 Spoilers

No really, spoilers. 

Previously on Wandavision — Wanda told SWORD to shove their drones right straight up their asses, Vision woke up to the reality that his utopian sitcom life was in fact a dystopian hellscape, their children were extremely creepy, and Agnes was being bizarre as hell and super sus. In the real world, Acting Director Dick was a dick, and Darcy and Jimmy welcomed Monica into their sciencey weird-crime-fighting team. Monica also mentioned an aerospace engineer she knows, which some suggest may be the first mention of Reed Richards in the MCU. I have conflicted feelings about the Fantastic Four. Mostly I never liked them. But, I'm open to revising my opinion.

Oh, and also X-Men 'Verse Pietro showed up suddenly and that was fun.

Anyway. the roommate and I tried to sort out a timeline — so Monica unBlips and goes back to work at SWORD three weeks later. AD Dick tells us Wanda stole Vision's body nine days previously. That means, just three weeks ago Wanda was in the middle of a battle, lost her boyfriend, was Snapped, was then unsnapped to fall right into the middle of another battle. Lost THREE additional teammates. And then sometime in the following week found out a shady government agency had Vision's body and she probably went "OH HELL NO". Because that's what I would say. So she goes to SWORD, dents a few doors, takes Vision's body and swans off to New Jersey. Look, she's been through a hell of a lot in the last couple weeks, is what I'm saying. I don't blame her a tiny bit. But, also, I don't think she's entirely behind this.

10-year old boy plus video camera = the 90s. Obnoxious opening credits. But, you know, I kind of liked them (as a one off). WAYYY better than last week's.

It's Halloween, and *sigh* Billy is breaking the fourth wall and narrating to the camera. There's childish twin bickering as you expect, Tommy's the wild and crazy twin, and Billy's the buttoned up twin. And Pietro is passed out on the couch at 4 in the afternoon. Living his best life. He teasingly scares the boys, chases them around, and there's awkward child acting.

Wanda comes down the stairs in the classic Scarlet Witch costume, and says she's a Sokovian Fortune Teller. Sokovia was more wild than I realized.

Genuinely funny flashback to Wanda and Pietro trick-or-treating in Sokovia as kids, 'the year we got typhus'. lol. Was it the fish that gave them typhus? Or was that just a special treat? Wanda doubts this version of events, and Pietro suggests she suppressed the memory due to the trauma. This gives Billy the chance to tell the camera that mom's been weird since uncle Pietro turned up to crash on their couch.

Next it's Vision's turn to appear in the classic Vision costume. Yikes. Wanda thanks him for humoring her, and he says there were no other clothes in his closet and they have a very weird second where he's not playing along and she's not sure what to do, and then he breaks into sitcom character says something about "just kidding, i know how much you love mexican wrestling" like it's a luchador costume, and then there's some super weird flirting. TMI you two.

Meanwhile, Pietro is a large child and the kids love him, of course. So there's that.

Back to Wanda and Vision, she's ready to take the kids out trick-or-treating, but Vision says he can't go, he's on the neighborhood watch and must patrol the streets ever-vigilant for wild gangs of child hooligans who might TP trees. He's gone off-script and it takes Wanda a second to figure out how to play this. She says it's the boys' first Halloween so he has to be there. Pietro breaks up the almost argument and says he can be a father figure-type and he'll help with the boys. Vision's still pretty off-script but Wanda doesn't fight it but looks uncertain, and he goes off to protect the night — or early afternoon.

Pietro is a child hooligan and wants to go do hooligany things with the kids. Wanda says he doesn't have a costume and he grabs Billy and they speed off only to return dressed in classic Quicksilver duds. Well, cheap-looking, thrown together Quicksilver duds. I laughed. The hair. lol. Good one.

Outside in the real world. The Hex field is still kind of glowing red and making bad force field noises. It only started doing that when Wanda got pissed in the last ep. Oh, goody, it's Acting Director Dick. I've learned his name is Hayward. I don't care.

Blah blah Stompy Mc-I'm-In-Charge blah. Monica is not pleased about the whole trying to kill Wanda with a missile while she was talking to her plan. AD Dick just says "now we know who we're dealing with". Um … what? You tried to kill her and her response was to tell you to go away. Yeah, boy, she's a monster.

Darcy is there to helpfully remind AD Dick that Wanda made him look like the fool he is. ILU girl. "Hey, there he is; the guy who almost got murdered by his own murder squad." Jimmy just makes a 'i'm so disappointed in you and your choices' face at him in the background.

I despise characters like Hayward. They are so tedious. Narratively they are there to incite conflict, but given the situation conflict naturally exists, surely there are other ways to bring up/drive that tension without the trope of the government heavy ready to solve the problem with the most extreme amount of force available to him. OH no! Our plucky heroes will have to find a way to save the day and fight the Man! Can they do it? Boring. It's too bad General Talbot went insane and then died; he could probably give tips on How Not To Be That Guy.

Anyway

Hayward wants to know if Darcy works for him and she's like "dunno my dude", Monica claims her, AD Dick says "which one of you is the sassy best friend" and Jimmy's like, that is quite enough Acting Director Not Very Nice Man. "There's no time to diminish your colleagues when you're about to start a war you can't win." AD Dick just wants to take out Wanda so the whole nightmare ends. Monica's like um, we literally do not know what's going on. Like, for real we have no clue. So that might not, in fact, end the nightmare, Director Murder Britches.

They argue a lot and Director Dick goes off the rails. Dude's like more unhinged than seems warranted. Unless he's just so embarrassed that he pissed himself when Wanda returned his murder drone to him, he's decided SHE MUST BE DESTROYED FOR THE GOOD OF … NEW JERSEY AND MY SOILED UNDERWEAR OR SOMETHING. 

"Captain Rambeau, you are an impediment to this mission!" Oh no! He's gonna tell her all about how hard it was to survive in a post-blip world, all those lucky blipped don't know what it was like! You just can't understand! Monica tells him not to use that as an excuse to be a coward. I'm so bored with this scene. Let me guess, the trio will have to go behind his back to save the day.

"Maybe it's a good thing you weren't here with your mother died. Because, clearly you don't have the stomach for this job." … non-sequitur much? Or is he saying she would have inherited the Director-ship (which should probably not be how that sort of agency works, let's be real). Is this scene five hours long, or does it just feel that way?

The Dick banishes the trio from his base.

"Hayward is way over-stepping his provisional authority". Jimmy Woo, you're so great. Monica says he's up to something. Yeah a tactical nuke and murder. Clearly he doesn't want to actually solve the problem, he just wants the problem to go away with a big show of macho explosions and whatnot. I suspect he might be in over his head, like he was not meant to be Acting Director, let alone Director. Also, he's a boring cliche stereotype and I loathe it.

JIMMY! I legit did not see that coming. He just pure hauls off and clocks one of the soldiers escorting them off the base, to a transport truck or something. Monica seems just as surprised for a second but then she's like "hell yeah!" and jumps in. Darcy sort of stands back and watches. lol. "Why didn't anyone tell me the plan?"

Oh look, it's my shipping container! They put the soldiers in there. Guys, it was for Hayward. Come on.

The trio disguise themselves with ponchos, which is a big step up from the usual MCU disguise of "baseball hat". That was a good bit in Ant-man and the Wasp "it's not a disguise, it just looks like us at a baseball game" (I watched that like last week. I missed Luis). Anyway …

Back in the sitcom world. The kids are ready for their early afternoon trick-or-treating. They're still talking to the camera. It's so awkward. I'm not a fan. I get it's meant to reproduce the very 90s Nick-era sitcoms and so, you know, it's spot on. Still, though.

Pietro is encouraging and supportive. "Unleash hell, demon spawn!"

Dang there are a lot of kids in that neighborhood. Wasn't Vision wondering last episode why there weren't any kids? Is the program correcting itself?

Wanda tries to test Pietro, asking him about some kid at an orphanage when they were kids. Pietro calls her on it, and says he knows he looks different. Wanda wants to know why that is. He says, "You tell me. I mean, if I found shangra-la, I wouldn't want to be reminded of the past, either." Hmm.

The kids speed off with uncle Pietro. Wanda wanders over to talk to neighbor Herb, who has a g-man earbud in and is clearly part of the neighborhood watch. In the background Pietro is stealing all the candy and smashing pumpkins and spraying the place with silly string. The hijinks are so wacky. Wanda tells Herb maybe Vision can help out with the chaos, and Herb says Vision isn't on duty. Oh no, he lied to her!

Herb goes weird "is there something I can do for you, Wanda? Do you want something changed?" Hmmm.

Elsewhere Vision is wandering the wild streets of Westview. He finds people caught in some type of weird decorating loop, the woman seems trapped but aware.

Commercial time!  What the fuck was that. "Yo-magic! The snack for survivors." No, really, what the fuck.

Night has fallen, the twins and the twins walk the streets. Wanda's making the boys give back all the candy they stole. She says Pietro is a bad influence. He says "I'm just trying to do my part, kay? Come to town unexpectedly, create tension with the brother-in-law, stir up trouble with the rugrats, and ultimately give you grief. I mean, that's what you wanted, isn't it?"

"What happened to your accent?"

"What happened to yours? Details are fuzzy, man. I got shot like a chump in the street for no reason." AHAHAHAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHA! no really AHAHAHAHAAH! Thank you, Pietro! Holy shit, perfect. That's some delicious shade. I expect to see this gif'd fifteen different ways when I load tumblr today.

"Next thing I know, I heard you calling me. I knew you needed me."

The kids interrupt. And now all of a sudden Tommy can zoom. Character development!

Everyone is so careful to give Wanda what she wants. Why? She's not cruel. Who wants to keep her pacified? And whoever it is cannot possibly be pleased with AD Dick messing things up. Assuming it's an outside or outside-ish force/entity, of course. I mean, I don't think she's doing this entirely, she might be the battery powering it, but despite her thing last episode to get SWORD to leave her alone, she does seem a little confused about the where, why, and how things are going.

"Don't go past Ellis Avenue." Just a kid thing or a boundary of the sitcom control world?

In the real world, our heroes are sneaking through a tent city and into the server room. The scene with Pietro and Wanda discussing his accent is playing in the background. Darcy seems put-out that Pietro was recast. lol. "He brought the wrong face."

Darcy hacks into Hayward's devices. "Hayward figured out a way to look through the boundary." "And he didn't share it with the group." I don't like Hayward. 

Something is blipping on the map on the computer. Jimmy asks if it's Wanda, but Darcy says "it's tracking the decay signature of vibranium". So Vision. Monica wants to know why Hayward is tracking Vision. Well, I'd super like to know what SWORD was doing with Vision in the first place, because they weren't just storing him, they were doing something. So …

Jimmy notices that there are other dots, the ones closest to Vision, who are other residents. Jimmy says the ones near the edge of town are barely moving.

Back to Vision. He's found a cul-de-sac to patrol. Everybody's frozen in place, the street lights flicker. Eerie. They're all dressed for Halloween. Does this mean the field is shrinking, or the effects spreading and so it's closing in, slowing and then freezing people who were earlier moving about just fine? Vision is unaffected by this whatever it is. He turns himself into himself and flies off, up above the town. part of the town is dark, and part alive with voices and laughter.

He spots a car at the edge of town. It's Agnes. She seems frozen-ish, but when he asks what she's doing there, she says "Town Square Scare. Where is it?" all robotic like. Vision helpfully tries to give directions. lol. "Took a wrong turn, got lost" she says.

Vision touches her head and she wakes up. "You! You're one of the Avengers. You're Vision. Are you here to help us?" "I am Vision. I do want to help. But, what's an Avenger?"

Hmm. Well, I guess he did say last week that he couldn't remember anything before Westview.

"Am I dead?" she asks. "No, why would you think that?" "Because you are."

What was news coverage after the Snap like, do you suppose? I mean, ridiculous, of course. But, like, I think they had bigger problems then wondering about snapped/dead Avengers, didn't they? Well, maybe not. "WHERE ARE AVENGERS TO HELP US?" or "HOW DARE THE AVENGERS NOT HELP US!" "TOTALLY THIS IS ON THE AVENGERS!" "WE'D ALL BE DEAD WITHOUT THE AVENGERS!" "NUHUH! BOO AVENGERS!" "EXCEPT VISION WHO DIED HEROICALLY, WE ALL LIKE THAT AVENGER!" "TONY STARK AND PEPPER POTTS SHARE THE DECORATING TIPS THAT TRANSFORMED THEIR RUSTIC RESTORATION PROJECT INTO A CHARMING FAMILY HOME".

Agnes starts screaming "Dead" at Vision. She's not coping well. Vision says he's going to try and reach outside town and try to figure this all out. "How? No one leaves. Wanda won't even let us think about it." I SUSPECT YOU, AGNES! Why would Wanda keep everybody trapped and miserable? I could see if she did it on accident, but this implies she's purposefully hurting people. I don't buy it. Agnes, again, seems to be in the right place at the right time to make Vision doubt Wanda. You're a very suspicious character, Agnes.  

She starts to laugh. "All is lost." Vision touches her had and she resets to sitcom Agnes. Somehow she can move again, she turns the car around on Ellis Ave and heads back into town. So, that answers that.

Vision walks across the Eillis Ave to the field beyond.

Meanwhile, Darcy continues to hack. Monica gets a text and says "that's it! My way back into the Hex will be here in an hour." Jimmy's all ready to boost a ride to take her to meet her aerospace buddy. But, Darcy says, nope. Can't do it. Monica's been through the Hex twice, and it's rewritten her cells. "It's changing you." Monica is undaunted. "I know what Wanda's feeling and I won't stop until I help her." Alrighty then.

Jimmy's finally going to get to hotwire a car! But wait, Darcy's not going with them. AD Dick has something hidden behind one last firewall. Darcy thinks it's big and can help them. She's going to find it.

I don't think Jimmy had to hotwire that humvee. It just started right up. Motorpool, pfft - they always leave the keys.

Back in Westview. Halloween continues at Town Square. Pietro asks Wanda where she was hiding all those kids. Whu? Says Wanda. "I assume they were all just sleeping peacefully in their beds. No need to traumatize beyond the occasional holiday cameo, amiright?" What is Pietro. "Hey don't get me wrong, you've handled the ethical considerations of this scenario as best you could. Families and couples stay together. Most personalities aren't far from what's underneath. People got better jobs. Better haircuts for sure."

"You don't think it's wrong?"

"Are you kidding me? I'm impressed. It's a pretty big leap from giving people nightmares and shooting red wigglywoos out your hands." No, really, what is Pietro? "How'd you even do all this?" Hmmm.

"I don't know how I did it. I only remember feeling completely alone. Empty. Just endless nothingness." She looks back at Pietro and for a second he's dead Pietro. Poor Wanda.

Darcy continues to hack Hayward's systems. Cataract classified weapons something something. They're still tracking Vision. Who continues his walk across the field and comes to the hex. He tries to push through it. Looks painful. SWORD rolls out to go overreact at him. He makes it through the barrier, kind of. It's a struggle.

Hayward standing there looking like a jackass "he really does want out, doesn't he?" Like he’s just amused by this turn of events, or watching a lab rat try to get out of the lab. 

Darcy's standing behind watching all of this. Bits of Vision sort of fly off and back into the Hex. Darcy says "oh no!" and runs towards him, screaming for them to help him. Way to give away your sneaky hiding, girlfriend.

In Westview. Billy looks up, he can hear what's going on outside. "I hear daddy in my head. He's in trouble."

Vision calls for help, while SWORD prioritizes arresting Darcy. Phil Coulson would never have behaved like this. Boo to SWORD. Vision is dissolving. It's kind of gross and sad.

Wanda asks where Vision is, and Pietro interrupts "Don't sweat it, sis. It's not like your dead husband can die twice." Wanda wallops him with some red wigglywoos.

Billy sees soldiers and thinks Vision is dying. Wanda stops everything and makes a big red boom. The Hex appears to be expanding. Whoops, now you've done it AD Dick. He runs away like the brave brave guy he is. They leave Darcy handcuffed to a jeep. "Are you serious right now?"

The Hex overtakes Vision and then Darcy. Trapped soldiers become clowns, and we're in the circus. Well, SWORD seems like a circus, so Wanda's not wrong. I'm pretty sure Jimmy and Monica made it, but sadly the bravest Director who ever braved also escaped. He deserved to be a circus clown. Better luck next week, Wanda.

Credits.

Well, I just don't know anymore.

Hayward doesn't care about Wanda, except where I think because of this someone will figure out what he was doing to Vision's body. And Vision is ultimately the thing he cares about in all this. I hope Wanda drops a house on him.

Hmmm.

Quit suggesting I watch Age of Ultron next, Disney. It’s not happening. 

[veethesnake]

A collection of hastily typed out thoughts before the next episode airs:

- “Pietro” is in fact Peter from the X-Men movies

- Señor Scratchy is either Nicholas Scratch (I don’t really think so), a connection to Mephisto (apparently that’s a name for the devil? Who knew), or Agatha’s cat

- the fly is Mephisto, or a sign showing he’ll come soon (I mean, the devil attracts flies, right?)

- the twins are still alive, either in the basement or already handed over to Mephisto

- Dottie is another magic user, maybe one of the Salem’s Seven (which I don’t know much about), maybe a(nother) pawn of Mephisto’s

- I really wanted to read more about Salem etc, because once I heard about it I thought Westview might be Salem - but then I found out that it’s placed in a different US state so that’s probably nothing

- the mailman is still very suspicious, which actually made me think of Salem in the first place (lots of people seem suspicious aka possible magic users)

- very very random but the mailman could also turn out to be Agatha’s son, who knows

- I am PUMPED to see what Monica’s powers are, how she reacts, what she will do

- “Ralph” might just be Mephisto

- hang on, I just went to Mephisto’s wiki page to see if “Ralph” could be an abbreviation and... he’s also called “the messenger”? As in... “don’t shoot me, I’m just the messenger”?!

- okay so Mephisto might have several forms, including the mailman and the fly and possibly the rabbit, too

- the question is... would Mephisto really take action and walk around giving the twins clues that their mother is up to no good? But on the other hand... he is a trickster, isn’t he

- so something that really stood out to me was “Pietro” saying “damn it, if Westview, New Jersey isn’t charming as hell” um? My dude? Do you mayhaps have actual knowledge about what hell looks like?? (What invalidates this thought is the German translation being not even close to this)

- so if Monica absorbs energy, I can’t wait to find out what happens when she meets Agatha and/or Wanda. Maybe she’s able to lift whatever spell Agatha used on Wanda?

- what about Herb? Is he just another victim, or does he know a little more? Argument for victim is Agatha using magic on him, argument for “something else” is him asking Wanda if she wanted anything changed

- what is the thing in Vision’s head? An illusion to look like the mind stone, the mind stone of a different universe (highly doubt that), something else that still gives him some sort of powers? He is able to change his appearance on his own, after all. He can fly, run fast, and used something on the computer, Norm and Agnes. Btw, what did Agatha think of Vision trying to use powers on her? Did it feel weird? Is she just able to ignore someone using their powers on her?

- is there another aero space engineer? Didn’t think of it, but after watching an interview with Teyonah Parris there might as well be someone else. Reed Richards would be cool bc of what I’ve read about Salem (I think he was there?? No?), any of the Skrulls in Captain Marvel would be dope, and I personably am still thinking about a possible Agent Brand (I hope she gets actual green hair)

- are the moments were Vision and “Pietro” turned into a dead version of themselves really some kind of “warning” or shock from Agatha or Mephisto - or is it just PTSD? I thought it was someone else or Wanda’s powers being weakened in the scene with Vision, because in the background you can already see that his head has a different colour. (I originally thought it would be a demonic head and Mephisto, which is why my easily-frightened ass wasn’t jumpscared.) But “Pietro” - you can see that for us, the audience, he looks normal. It’s only the back of his head, but he looks alive as usual. Only from Wanda’s perspective we see him dead

- now that’s something really specific and weird, but when “Pietro” said “you probably suppressed a lot of the trauma” I first understood “your brother suppressed a lot of the trauma”. Probably just my ears, but it did make me think that Peter got forced to play brother to this Wanda, or (and I know this is the exact opposite) someone who isn’t Peter got ahold of his body (and memories).

- the Nexus sounds fricking cool and I hope they’ll actually do something cool with it and open up the mess that will continue into Multiverse of Madness, Spider-Man, Loki and possibly even Falcon and Winter Soldier... I mean, what would be better for Zemo to worry about superheroes than one/some causing as much trouble as I believe Wandavision will do?

In conclusion... I have no idea, everything contradicts itself, I’m excited to see Monica with superpowers and my fav trio even though they’re split up now, and I hope the episode will be a bit longer...

[stringthvories]

@the-fantastic-mister-richards​

Lark had always been used to people asking him for his specially custom made attire in district X. Usually his orders were for the student residents of the school, making them clothing and suits for whatever the case was for their particular circumstance regarding their powers. Never did he charge them for any requests, it wouldn’t feel right to ask for compensation for something those kids had no control over. So the side business of being a tailor worked just fine, and some high profile name that required suits always paid handsomely, even if sometimes it felt awkward to take money from people who saved the world. Usually he made the newer suits for the X-men, his latest iteration making sure the suits could adapt to any sort of terrain and situation the team found themselves in. All of that was expected, but what he never thought would happen was someone as renowned as Reed Richards asking for his handwork. Given the prestige of the Fantastic Four, he knew he couldn’t spend too little time on this request and make it some of his best work yet.

“Mr, Richards. It’s Lark Herondale, I’ve got the items you requested with all of the specifications in your notes.” Lark called out in front of his door, wanting to hand deliver the packages, cause a conversation with Reed Richards might open many doors for him. Doors that could help him create a better life for mutant, meta, and inhuman kind. “Um, I know it’s odd of me to ask but why did you choose me for this? I know you’ve always been the mastermind behind your team’s suits.”

[lovelyirony]

avengers B99 au, interactions with secondary characters :))

Bruce Banner doesn’t like doing his job. He really, really doesn’t. Usually Thor can make arrests or something, but no. They needed someone with scientific backgrounds, and Tony already said he would and could launch himself across the room and ruin society if it meant he would have to take a different shift. 

There’s a mole somewhere. And Bruce? Well, he’s about the least-threatening person on the Avengers force. 

(This is in fact a lie because if possible, Bruce would take over the government.) 

This is why he’s at work on a Sunday at six p.m., which is horrible and awful. 

He meets Reed Richards, who is perhaps the worst man ever and is very bad at science. Somehow, he’s gotten ten papers published. 

“I’m Dr. Richards,” he says, extending his hand. “Are you new here?” 

Bruce has passed Dr. Richards every day on his way home for the last six years. 

“Um, no,” Bruce says, taking his hand in a shake. “Just switched shifts. I’m usually the day, week shift.” 

“Oh, you were with those guys. Stark drive you crazy?” 

“No,” Bruce says, gritting his teeth. “More of the others.” 

“Well, glad you’ve joined our team. Better over here, right?” 

“...remains to be seen.” 

(It does not remain to be seen. This shift notoriously sucks.) 

Bruce is in charge of observing the different people. He finds out that Susan Storm has horrible taste in men, her brother is an asshole who everyone says Tony would get along with--which means they don’t get Tony in any way--and he doesn’t know what Ben Grimm’s deal is or why people call him “Thing.” 

“You’ll get it soon,” Susan says. “Just...wait.” 

Bruce emails Fury. 

Dear Captain Fury, 

You owe me margarita mix and at least 10 gazillion dollars in emotional damage. I cannot believe that I have to socialize with Reed Richards. In my scientific opinion, I hate this. I am very very close to total anarchy and getting rid of Barbra. Consider this your threat. 

Sincerely, 

Bruce Banner 

(Barbra is the Keurig. It is Tony’s prized possession and almost 48% of the reason he was still at the precinct.) 

The mole in the department is hard to find. Everyone has a reason, except for Dr. Richards, who doesn’t have a reason on the basis that he is a horrible person who Bruce would not be surprised to know that he probably owns at least twenty different sponges since he wants to be so absorbed in himself. You’d probably just need to hold a mirror up to his face to distract him. 

The arrests made are also different. 

A lot of drunk and disorderly, which Bruce handles with efficiency although he gets embroiled in a conversation about different brands of shaving cream. 

The only good thing about any of this is that Bruce gets to see Luke Cage in action. Luke is most likely the best human being in New York, and this isn’t just because he’s one of the few that can be partnered with Detective Jessica Jones and not die by the end of it. 

“I have really thick skin,” Luke jokes. 

“I think I’m in love with you,” Bruce announces. He’s on his seventh cup of coffee. “That’s the coffee talking.” 

Luke doesn’t treat that awkwardly, because apparently “more than five people have said this to me.” 

Bruce thinks it’s what he deserves. 

- 

Meanwhile on day shift during the weeks, it has gone to chaos. Bruce Banner is one of the main team members, and holds many people together due to a.) the fact that everyone on the team would kill for Bruce, b.) he makes good tea and knows the gossip, and c.) he’s perhaps the only one who can calm Thor down because Thor loves his husband more than life itself. 

Things are not going well. 

Plus, Dr. Richards keeps emailing Tony different stories about “how much better suited” Bruce is now. 

This conflicts with Bruce’s emails about “wanting to severely injure certain members of this shift, which initials are the same and are ‘R.R.’ 

Thor is cranky and wants his husband back and knows that he will riot if he doesn’t get to sleep in the same bed as his husband at the same time soon. 

-

Bruce is getting suspicious of a guy who goes by the name of Aldrich Killian. Just got hired by the precinct for tech support, but keeps weird hours and wears green polo shirts. Light green. This doesn’t necessarily mean a lot of things, but seriously. Who wears a light green polo shirt? To work? Get real. 

So Bruce starts his investigation and sends information to Fury and Tony. 

-

Killian then finds out that Bruce suspects, and traps him in the file room. 

“I literally, quite honestly, hate you a lot,” Bruce says. “It’s not even ten p.m. yet and I’m stuck here.” 

“And you will be unless you send your boss a message saying that I’m innocent,” Killian hisses. “And then you quit your job, or so help me I’m gonna kill you.” 

“Go ahead, try it,” Bruce says. “Kill me, I bet that’ll be real fun for your court case. Especially when everyone knows I’m here. And when you skip town, and you will, they’ll hunt after you. Tell me, you want Natasha Romanoff standing over your bed? Not fun.” 

“I’ll manage.” 

Bruce does not think he will. Because while Bruce has been talking, he’s realized one thing: the shelves are not bolted down. 

Then he remembers the time that Steve knocked one over because he was very angry about a case. 

So Killian gets a whole row of unsolved 1970s cases dumped on top of him. 

Bruce then doesn’t feel the need to do anything for the next ten minutes, because it is quite heavy. 

So he gets a coffee, has a stimulating conversation with Clint about “whether or not deer could actually feel anything but hubris and greed,” and then decides to casually tell Fury he found the mole. 

“When?” 

“Um, ten minutes ago? I went to get coffee. Clint wanted to talk about scientific things.” 

“Please tell me you did not leave the mole for your damn conversation about deer. Don’t.” 

“Then I won’t tell you shit. Just let me have my shift back.” 

Bruce comes back to the weekday shift. Thor decides to take his husband out to lunch and sweep him up into a hug. 

“Never volunteer again. Ever.” 

“I didn’t volunteer, Tony opted out. I missed you too, babe.” 

“Now that you guys are being disgusting and I think it’s over, I want to take this opportunity to announce that I got published,” Clint says. 

“What? No you didn’t,” Bucky says. “You don’t even do any research! Did you write your crime novel?” 

“No, I gave up on that because I can’t spell handkerchief.” 

“You used it that much?” 

“Yes, it was important to the plot. But anyway, Bruce kept talking about deer and about our theory about greed and hubris so I published the paper.” 

“Who published it?” Bruce demands. 

“Um, I don’t know? I just know that it’s apparently ‘wildly new’ among ecologists.” 

“This doesn’t sound right, but I don’t know enough about scientific publishing to prove it,” Bucky says. “Congrats, Clint? I guess?” 

Bruce grins. 

He’s happy to be home.  

Even if he just learned that they have to deal with some FBI chump about inspections. But that’s okay. 

[f4liveblogarchives]

Fantastic Four Vol 1 #231

Thurs Apr 30 2020 [10:59 PM] Wack'd: It's actually the gruffest looking comic writer you’ve ever seen. It’s like if somebody put Jack Kirby through a meat grinder and just sorta schluffed him back together again and then like glued some hair onto him. He's smoking a big cigar and he says "My name...is

[11:00 PM] Bocaj: HAH! [11:01 PM] Umbramatic: pfft [11:02 PM] Wack'd: Seriously, his name is just Gurland. Even Marvel Wiki says so. This issue is the only reference I can find of this person *ever existing* [11:02 PM] Mousa The 14: ... [11:02 PM] Mousa The 14: What [11:02 PM] Mousa The 14: No... No first... no first name? No alias? That’s not possible. Someone’s gotta know something! [11:03 PM] maxwellelvis: This might be an Alan Smithee [11:03 PM] Wack'd: If it is, no one knows who it's one for [11:03 PM] maxwellelvis: Could have been one for everyone [11:04 PM] Umbramatic: The Gurland Collective [11:06 PM] Wack'd: Anyway, our story opens not with the Four but this great collage of NYC humanity reacting to their neighborhood having been abruptly Negative Zoned.

[11:06 PM] maxwellelvis: Why's the head of Filmation working a construction job? [11:06 PM] Wack'd: Look at Filmation's finances and ask that again [11:07 PM] maxwellelvis: Ha [11:07 PM] Umbramatic: burn [11:07 PM] maxwellelvis: 'course this is just a few years before they got the He-Man deal [11:08 PM] Wack'd: Anyway, back at the Baxter, Ben is really cheesed off. As far as he's concerned, this just isn't the sort of thing heroes do to an unsuspecting populous of average joes, and he's really steamed that Reed didn't think this out. [11:08 PM] maxwellelvis: As right he should be. [11:08 PM] Mousa The 14: Legit [11:09 PM] Wack'd: Reed, to his credit, apologizes, and concedes that even with the pressure of Earth's impending destruction, he could've thought harder about all this. [11:09 PM] Mousa The 14: Earth’s destruction is a lot of pressure admittedly [11:09 PM] Umbramatic: yes! listen to ben! [11:10 PM] Mousa The 14: But also he deals with that every week so [11:10 PM] Mousa The 14: Not that much pressure, he should be used to it by now [11:10 PM] Wack'd: He's also been monitoring the situation and found that the island is moving, specifically towards the Distortion Area, which is where the Baxter's Negative Zone portal usually opens up. [11:11 PM] maxwellelvis: Uh-oh [11:11 PM] maxwellelvis: That can't be good. [11:11 PM] Wack'd: It's...kind of good. [11:11 PM] Mousa The 14: Yeah [11:11 PM] Mousa The 14: That’s a way home [11:11 PM] maxwellelvis: Yeah, but the other side is currently in the Negative Zone [11:11 PM] Wack'd: See, the Distortion Area just kinda shunts shit between the Positive and Negative Zones naturally, so ideally if the island gets there they can go home. [11:12 PM] maxwellelvis: That's just ASKING for space to warp and bend to the snapping point. [11:12 PM] Mousa The 14: They don’t have much a choice right now [11:12 PM] Mousa The 14: And they use that area all the time [11:12 PM] Mousa The 14: It’ll be fine [11:12 PM] Wack'd: However, to get there, they need to. You know. Traverse the Negative Zone. Which even apart from the monsters has a host of terrors in it. [11:12 PM] Mousa The 14: Iiiiiits fiiiiiiiiiiine [11:13 PM] Wack'd: Specifically, they'll have to pass through Sub-Space, a nexus of all realities that could dump them literally anywhere if it doesn't destroy them first. [11:13 PM] maxwellelvis: And during all of this, hope that Annihilus doesn't spot this chunk of city floating through space. [11:14 PM] Wack'd: And Reed can't put too much computing power into calculating a trajectory or even figuring out how to steer, since he needs as much electricity as possible to keep the bubble protecting their neighborhood going. [11:15 PM] Mousa The 14: “Citizens, my name is Mr. Fantastic of the Fantastic Four. As you know, we have rescued the earth with the help of your unwilling sacrifice. The good news is I may have found a way home!” [11:15 PM] Umbramatic: this is a lot of fuckery [11:15 PM] Mousa The 14: “Now we might die horribly torn across the 5th dimensions, but that is a risk I am willing to take on your behalf” [11:16 PM] Mousa The 14: “I’m certain you would all agree to my plan of getting all of us home even if it kills us” [11:17 PM] maxwellelvis: "Let's just beat him up and take his stuff!" [11:17 PM] maxwellelvis: "No no no, do not listen to that man!" [11:17 PM] Aleph Null: imagine being stuck in this scenario and the only person with the know how to get you out is the person who got you in [11:18 PM] Wack'd: Anyway, on top of all this, there are a couple of new problems brewing. One of them is a giant purple spacegod who thinks his territory is being invaded...and the other is a construction foreman.

[11:18 PM] maxwellelvis: Purple guy's probably just pissed because of his very painful-looking glasses. [11:19 PM] Wack'd: ...I just noticed the foreman is also wearing purple and glasses [11:19 PM] Wack'd: That's some good storytelling [11:19 PM] Mousa The 14: ART [11:19 PM] maxwellelvis: And "Stygorr" and "Lew Shiner" sound a little bit similar as far as names go [11:19 PM] Umbramatic: don't trust purple glasses [11:19 PM] Mousa The 14: The true villain was the foreman we made along the way! [11:20 PM] Mousa The 14: Man, they’re really going for the parallels thing, huh [11:20 PM] Wack'd: So Reed has a plan [11:20 PM] Wack'd: All they need is to build up infinite momentum. For complicated science reasons. The problem is generating force. [11:21 PM] Bocaj: UM [11:21 PM] Aleph Null: @Wack'd hang on [11:21 PM] maxwellelvis: Infinite momentum. [11:21 PM] maxwellelvis: Right. [11:21 PM] maxwellelvis: That means "very fast" [11:21 PM] Wack'd: Yes, that's what I said. [11:21 PM] Mousa The 14: Infinite... right. [11:21 PM] maxwellelvis: got it [11:21 PM] Umbramatic: LUDICROUS SPEED [11:21 PM] Mousa The 14: That’s how science works [11:21 PM] Aleph Null: reed trying to tap into the fucking speed force here [11:21 PM] Aleph Null: thinks he’s goddamn sonic t hedgehog [11:21 PM] maxwellelvis: I actually think Neelix would be a better scientitian in this instance than Reed, gods help me. [11:22 PM] Aleph Null: oh god this was literally a voyager episode [11:22 PM] Aleph Null: thanks max [11:22 PM] Wack'd: Back on Earth, Lorrie feels awkward

[11:23 PM] maxwellelvis: "I can see you all!" -- Franklin Richards, 1980 [11:23 PM] Wack'd: I'll say this--this is the most acceptably child-looking Franklin we've gotten. Um. Ever? [11:23 PM] Aleph Null: he looks like a small adult [11:24 PM] Wack'd: Eh [11:24 PM] Aleph Null: i mean, sure. less like a small adult. than usual [11:25 PM] Umbramatic: franklin is watching you. judging you. [11:25 PM] Wack'd: SO! Reed and Ben are going to fight purple dude. Sue is the last line of defense in case purple dude breaks the bubble protecting the neighborhood. Johnny is making sure Reed and Ben stay tethered to the Baxter [11:25 PM] Wack'd: YELLOW! FROM THE YELLOW DIMENSION!

[11:26 PM] Bocaj: Hal Jordan: ;__; [11:26 PM] Aleph Null: pissland! [11:26 PM] Aleph Null: "Wack'd and Umbra are typing..." [11:27 PM] Umbramatic: i was gonna say that dimension wasn't always yellow [11:27 PM] Wack'd: Stygorr claims to be the equal of Annihilus and Blastaar, so naturally I checked Marvel Wiki and he gets his ass kicked this issue and we never see him again [11:27 PM] maxwellelvis: "No no, don't worry, it's lemon" [11:27 PM] Wack'd: He has the power to change his body from matter to anti-matter, which, uh, causes explosions, I think? [11:28 PM] Bocaj: Surrrre [11:28 PM] maxwellelvis: That is the basic theory of matter-antimatter [11:28 PM] maxwellelvis: Matter + antimatter = kaboom [11:28 PM] Umbramatic: antimatter god huh? [11:29 PM] Wack'd: Meanwhile, an army of militants convinced that they are being conspired against are about to storm the buildings of the people who are supposed to be preventing them from dying painfully. You know. Something that would never happen in real life. [11:29 PM] Wack'd: Certainly wouldn't happen today, in America. Nope. [11:29 PM] Wack'd: Comic book fantasy at its best. [11:29 PM] Umbramatic: also eeeeeeeep [11:31 PM] Wack'd: All these people are white so the cop, singular, doesn't shoot at them. The foreman successfully steals his gun. [11:32 PM] Bocaj: Well [11:32 PM] Wack'd: ...i just remembered the foreman's motivation here is that he needs to stay on deadline [11:32 PM] Wack'd: i fucking hate everything [11:32 PM] Bocaj: Huh! [11:32 PM] maxwellelvis: THE ESCAPISM OF COMIC BOOKS [11:32 PM] Bocaj: The more things comic the more they stay the same [11:33 PM] Bocaj: I imagine the writer though this was obvious ludicrous ridiculousness [11:33 PM] Bocaj: The way that comic book villainy is just a thing that happens openly nowadays [11:33 PM] Wack'd: Anyway the foreman's like "okay, so here's the plan, we go into the Baxter building and do the thing that will get us home" [11:34 PM] Wack'd: And a member of the mob is like "but Reed and Ben aren't in the bubble right now? How're they gonna get back" [11:34 PM] Wack'd: And the foreman's like "fuck them, actually" [11:34 PM] Wack'd: And now the mob has Doubts [11:34 PM] maxwellelvis: You serious? [11:35 PM] Wack'd: Sue wants to use a force field to keep the mob out, but unfortunately a hole in the containment field has cropped up so she needs to send Johnny to deal with this nonsense [11:36 PM] Bocaj: Raimi sure got Jameson right [11:36 PM] Wack'd: I could pin this on Sue needing to be kept out of action but I think the fact is seeing Johnny deal with this nonsense is just more entertaining. The mob is using fucking dynamite and wrecking balls [11:36 PM] Umbramatic: oh boy [11:36 PM] Wack'd: The foreman tries to shoot Johnny [11:36 PM] Wack'd: And suddenly the mob is like "fuck this, actually" [11:37 PM] Wack'd: They successfully dogpile him so he gives up and runs off, shouting about how they need him and he'll be back [11:37 PM] Umbramatic: The Mob Has Standards [11:38 PM] Wack'd: It's nice, yeah [11:38 PM] Wack'd: Anyway, Reed has A Plan [11:39 PM] Wack'd: Stygorr keeps rotating the island by blasting at it. They are going to release the demolition site from the bubble just as it's in Stygorr's range, creating a huge matter/antimatter explosion [11:39 PM] Wack'd: Which will create infinite momentum [11:40 PM] Wack'd: Johnny goes to make sure there's no one still there and evacuates everyone [11:40 PM] Bocaj: "Stygorr keeps rotating the island by blasting at it" this makes me laugh [11:40 PM] Wack'd: Except this dipshit who is definitely going to die

[11:42 PM] Umbramatic: that man, later, probably [11:43 PM] Wack'd: I want to praise the storytelling here but it occurs to me these guys have literally nothing in common besides being the bad guys of this issue and similar aesthetics so like. Uh.

[11:44 PM] maxwellelvis: Well, they both immediately assume that this is a personal attack on them and immediately go off to kill the FF [11:44 PM] Wack'd: Also christ the inks on this section are garbage [11:44 PM] Wack'd: I suppose that's true, sure [11:44 PM] Bocaj: They're thematic doubles [11:44 PM] Bocaj: And the universe abhors doubles [11:45 PM] Bocaj: I assume anyway since everyone is always saying 'no doubles' [11:45 PM] maxwellelvis: FA-BA-BA-BOOM [11:45 PM] Wack'd: But also like. Uh. We don't actually know what purple dude wanted or what his deal was besides being a baddie? [11:45 PM] Wack'd: Like the foreman had very concrete and specific motivations and pathology [11:45 PM] Umbramatic: Holy shit, there’s two of them https://imgur.com/Br8T9tS https://i.imgur.com/Br8T9tSh.jpg [11:45 PM] Wack'd: Purple dude just yelled a lot [11:45 PM] maxwellelvis: I think he assumed this was an attack on his kingdom or something [11:46 PM] Wack'd: He did but after his big intro speech he doesn't really say anything meaningful about himself [11:46 PM] Wack'd: hahahahahahhaahahahahahhahahah

[11:47 PM] Bocaj:

Purple Guy: -shoots lasers- "BY THE WAY, I'M A VIRGO AND LIKE LONG WALKS ON THE BEACH" Ben: "Uh" Purple Guy: "I'M LOOKING FOR LOVE BUT FEAR I'M UNLOVABLE AND ALSO I FEAR MATTER ANTI-MATTER ANNIHILATION"

[11:47 PM] Wack'd: Some real forty-years-later quarterbacking here but like [11:48 PM] Wack'd: Maybe if purple guy had also been in actual peril at some point? [11:48 PM] maxwellelvis: Isn't this the ending of TMNT: The Hyperstone Heist? [11:48 PM] Wack'd: Because like the New Yorkers are kinda right to be cheesed off [11:48 PM] Wack'd: Anyway [11:48 PM] maxwellelvis: Yeah, but he starts a lynch mob because he personally is inconvenienced by this. [11:49 PM] Wack'd: New writer incoming, new love interest awkwardly exits stage left

[11:49 PM] Bocaj: Aw [11:49 PM] Bocaj: Shame [11:49 PM] Umbramatic: f for johnny [11:49 PM] Bocaj: I liked the character beat of her sort of envying how close knit the Fantastic Four Family fwere [11:52 PM] maxwellelvis: Does Lorrie get a last name? [11:52 PM] Wack'd: She does, it's Melton [11:52 PM] Wack'd: Which is cute [11:52 PM] maxwellelvis: Ahh [11:53 PM] Wack'd: She is also never seen again according to Marvel Wiki. which is less cute [11:53 PM] Wack'd: So many great characters casually discarded in the 70s interim [11:53 PM] maxwellelvis: Alas [11:53 PM] Wack'd: ...fuck [11:54 PM] Wack'd: Okay this is hilarious. A legendary six-year run starting with "Diablo! Everyone likes Diablo, right?"

[11:55 PM] maxwellelvis: Shall we wrap it up for the night or dive right in to the Byrne era? [11:55 PM] Wack'd: Also fuck "back to basics". Everyone in the letters pages is complaining too much 60s stuff has been discarded and I'm over here desperately trying to think of a single Lee/Kirby thing I miss that hasn't been retained [11:55 PM] Wack'd: I don't even remember what Diablo's shtick was. Is he the illusions guy? [11:55 PM] maxwellelvis: Alchemy [11:56 PM] Wack'd: Cool [11:56 PM] maxwellelvis: He's the guy who made Dragon Man, too. [11:56 PM] maxwellelvis: And most memorably, tried to get Ben under his thumb by partially curing him, putting him in this creepy "Ben-Thing" intermediary state. [11:57 PM] Wack'd: Right, I remember Dragon Man. He has nothing to do with dragons, and he has nothing to do with men. He has everything to do with hurting [11:57 PM] Wack'd: You know what? I will say this. [11:57 PM] Wack'd: The 70s hasn't had nearly enough Mad Thinker [11:57 PM] maxwellelvis: And even less of Andy [11:57 PM] Wack'd: I don't care about Andy so much but for your sake I hope he returns [11:58 PM] Wack'd: LETTERS! [11:59 PM] Wack'd: There's not much here. People are torn on the Brain Parasites, and one writer is sad Doug and Bill are leaving. [12:03 AM] maxwellelvis: Anyways, I find it hilarious, all these letters calling for a back to basics thing, to the point that the next issue is titled that in the preview blurb, when John Byrne is one writer who brings in a lot of shake-ups

[becky-helene]

How did I get here? (might be long post)

Thought one:

Y’all omg omg omg omg @octopunkmedia ‘s Detroit Evolution....FUCKING FANTASTIC omg omg omg. I screamed. I actually screamed. Well....it was actually a squeal. But still! Out loud audible reactions were had! Omg omg. You’d think I was watching Olicity, or Malec* (if in a universe where I was in SH/Malec from the jump and didn’t fall down that fandom rabbit hole much later/only recently, ie livewatching things, not having seen clips of big moments beforehand therefore knew they were coming and thus the impact of these long built up things was a little lessened) or any other OTP that owns my whole existence. That’s how loud and choked up I was. And even beyond otp/shipping, sooooooo good. Loved it. Loved everything about it.

Thought two:

....wait, exactly how did I get here?

Seriously. There was a time where Reed900 was so not a thing that pinged in my brain. I just didn’t get the appeal, and didn’t understand where it came from.

At first I assumed it was “they don’t even meet? Um so....i dun get it....”

....but once I suddenly found myself actually shipping Hank/Rose I realized that argument had no leg to stand on. (I think part of that is “I just want the human parental figures to androids to get together! Let them be all Yours Mine and Ours to our android babies!”, as well as part there were times while playing that Hank reminded me of my dad, and Rose reminded me of my mom....so, yeah, gonna ship my parents obviously lol).

Plus, given that Connara owns my soul, and their canonical interactions are just one or two degrees off of “but they never met!”, even more reason why that’s no argument to turn my nose up at a ship lol.

I think my Reed900 ambivalence really stems from a RK900 ambivalence. My dbh playthroughs have all been “I recognize there are other endings, but given that they’re depressing-ass endings, I’ve elected to ignore them” and I never get anything but good endings for the three protags, RK900 never appeared in “my” dbh, therefore there was no connection to his character the same way as Connor, Kara, Markus, North, Simon, Josh, Luther, Alice, and everyone else. If it wasn’t for seeing YouTube clips of various dbh endings, RK900 wouldn’t exist at all to me.

So, to ship a pair where one involved “didn’t exist” was so foreign to me.

Then came Detroit Awakening.

At first i was like “welp, dbh has consumed my soul...oh score a dbh fanfilm on YouTube! Reed900? Sure why not *shrug*, it’s dbh content! Gimmie!”

And I fell in love with Nines. The portrayal in Awakening definitely made the character now “exist” to me. So much so that it inspired things for Run With Me series/Take Me to Church sequel (...when I finally get back to updating the fic eep). I was originally not going to have RK900 in it at all, but Awakening inspired ideas of well yeah what would being activated and navigating emotion and existence be like for him? What would it be like for Connor? And then came a whole worldwind of aaaaaangst and conflict that was just too delicious to erase from my brain.

I’m not sure if RK900 in future fic=Reed900 yet, I think he’s so far in there as a “little brother” figure and source of conflict in the Connor and Markus bromance. But who knows where the muses take me once I get there (which given that I’m still working on TMtC....the muses have a while to decide).

(The closest I’ve so far come to some Reed900-ness is, in me going with one of the fanon propped up names for RK900 I’ve seen—Richard—-I had a funny idea of after everyone waiting for him to pick a name for himself, he excitedly goes “Detective Reed just shoved past me and called me ‘dick’. I have learned that that is a nickname for Richard! I’ve been given a name!” to folks at DPD and Chris winces and is like “umm....actually-“ only for someone, either Hank or Ben, to be like “*stfu look to Chris* Sure! That’s a great name, kid!” not having the heart to burst his bubble, lol. So idk maybe my muses will decide, much like Awakening, a Reed given name being paliable to RK900=Reed900. We shall see where my head’s at when I get there).

Anyway, so yeah, Detroit Awakening definitely made RK900, and thus the concept of Reed900, a lot more...I guess tangiable...in my brain. Fast forward to the build up to Detroit Evolution. It was at first just excitement for more dbh content+continuation and expansion of content I’d already seen and enjoyed, then more excitement at seeing just how much more expanded it will be, and then when it came to seeing videos with the cast+tiny snippets of scenes seeing the I guess chemistry between the two leads I found myself sinking deeper and deeper into the Reed900 quicksand until I was finall full on, to my previous attitude, “I don’t care, I ship it!”

So yeah, that then leads me to actually watching Detroit Evolution a little while ago and y’all I was in full ship mode: Sitting at edge of seat(bed), can’t keep eyes off screen, heart feeling full at the soft moments, wanting to scream “you idiot!” at the angst moments, the ‘omg i...is it going to happen? Oh please don’t tease....please don’t leave me hanging here....’ shipper chant, and the aforementioned actual audible vocal reaction lump in my throat had to pause the movie to recover moment.

And in pausing and taking stock of that reaction I realized that....wait how did I get to this point? I used to be so meh on Reed900. What happened?

@octopunkmedia happened lol. Seriously. I don’t know if I’m even necessarily a Reed900 shipper full stop in so far as seeking out Reed900 fic or other fanworks like I have with Connara or any other otp. (I think it falls in some gray ship area of I don’t seek it out, but if i come across it I won’t turn it away and actually like it) But I will definitely say I full on ship Michelle’s Reed900 lol.

Anyway so yeah that’s my long winded half screeching happily about Detroit Evolution/half self reflection on shipping & otp stuff. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[transienturl]

Q: How much do I know about sports off the top of my head? I’m bored, so let’s find out.

NFL:

NFC West (one of the strongest divisions ever):

Seattle Seahawks. Key (and less-key) players: Russell Wilson (QB), DK Metcalf (WR), Tyler Lockett (WR), Freddie Swain (WR), Greg Olsen (TE), Colby Parkinson (TE), Damien Lewis (G), Duane Brown (T), Ethan Pocic (C, I think?), Chris Carson (RB), Rashaad Penny (RB), Travis Homer (RB), Michael Dickson (P), help what’s the kicker’s name, Jamal Adams (S), Quandre Diggs (S), Bobby Wagner (LB), KJ Wright (LB), Jordyn Brooks (LB), Poona Ford (DI), Jarran Reed (defensive... line somewhere), Shaquill Griffon (CB), Quinton Jefferson (CB), Tre Flowers (CB), Benson Mayowa (DE), Carlos Dunlap (DE), Alton Robinson (DE), Shaquem Griffon (DE), god I can’t remember the new slot corner but he’s pretty good I think. Coach: Pete Carroll. OC: Brian Schottenheimer. DC: Ken Norton, Jr. GM: John Schneider. Owner: Jody Allen. Notes: Every game is close. Used to always run, but this year always throws. Quarterback is basically magic. Defense is severely lacking. My home team, obviously.

San Francisco 49ers. Key players: Jimmy Garoppolo (QB), George Kittle (TE), many fast running backs, Raheem Mostert is one of them, Trent Williams (T), Richard Sherman (CB), Nick Bosa (DE). Coach: Kyle Shanahan. Notes: Running game scheme is a work of staggering genius. Best player is a tight end for some reason. Went to the Super Bowl last year.

Arizona Cardinals. Key players: Kyler Murray (QB), Larry Fitzgerald (WR), DeAndre Hopkins (WR), Christian Kirk (WR), Budda Baker (S), Patrick Peterson (CB). Coach: Kliff Kingsbury. Notes: Runs many wide receivers, in scheme Kingsbury got from coaching college. Used to be bad, but getting better each year. Kyler is very small.

Los Angeles Rams. Key players: Jared Goff (QB), Cooper Kupp (WR), Andrew Whitworth (T), Darrell Henderson (RB), Aaron Donald (DI), Johnny Hekker (P). Coach: Sean McVay. DC: Used to be Wade Phillips, but not anymore. Notes: Runs a lot of plays from the same formation. Coach is very smart. Made the Super Bowl two years ago. Best player is a defensive tackle, for some reason.

NFC East (the worst division in NFL history):

New York Giants. Key players: Daniel Jones (QB), Saquon Barkley (RB). Coach: Joe, uh... Douglas. GM: Dave Gettleman. Notes: Spent a huge amount of draft capital on players the numbers said weren’t worth it. Seems accurate.

Philadelphia Eagles. Key players: Carson Wentz (QB), Jalen Hurts (backup QB), literally everyone else is injured. Oh, Jason Peters (T). Coach: Doug Peterson. GM: Howie Roseman. Notes: Everyone is injured. Everyone. Went to the Super Bowl 3 years ago and won with their backup QB.

Dallas Cowboys. Key players: Dak Prescott (QB, injured), Andy Dalton (backup QB, injured), No one of note (third-string QB), Amari Cooper (WR), CeeDee Lamb (WR), Ezekiel Elliott (RB), Leighton Vander Esch (LB), Greg Zuerlein (K), I could probably name more if I tried hard enough. Coach: Mike McCarthy. GM: Jerry Jones. Owner: Also Jerry Jones. Notes: Every year they have good players and lose anyway. Paid their running back instead of their quarterback. Also, now they have no healthy quarterback.

Washington [used to have a racist name]. Key players: Dwayne Haskins (benched QB), Alex Smith (QB... whose leg does not work), Kyle Allen (QB), Terry McLaurin (WR), Chase Young (DE), Montez Sweat (DE). Coach: Ron Rivera. Owner: Dan Snyder, who is the worst human being in the NFL, and that is saying a lot. Notes: No one cares about the football, Dan Snyder should be in jail. Also, Ron Rivera has cancer and Alex Smith’s leg injury almost killed him, so those guys deserve better.

NFC North:

Detroit Lions. Key Players: Matthew Stafford (QB), um, I should remember some more. Jeff Okudah (CB). Coach: Matt Patricia. Notes: Stafford deserves better. Patricia keeps signing ex-Patriots players, and it doesn’t work, presumably because the good ones are current-Patriots-players.

Minnesota Vikings. Key players: Kirk Cousins (QB), Adam Thielen (WR), Justin Jefferson (WR), Dalvin Cook (RB), many good defensive players whose names I don’t know. Coach: Mike Zimmer. Notes: Historically a good defense and just missing a competent QB. Paid a lot for an average QB; defense sucks now for some reason. Also, runs a lot.

Chicago Bears. Key Players: Mitchell Trubisky (QB), Nick Foles (QB), Allen Robinson (WR), Khalil Mack (DE). Coach: Matt Nagy. Notes: Has been wasting great defensive performances with poor to average quarterback play since World War II.

Green Bay Packers. Key Players: Aaron Rodgers (QB), Davante Adams (WR), Allan Lazard (WR), Aaron Jones (RB), Jamaal Williams (RB), Robert Tonyan (TE), David Bakhtiari (T), Za’Darius Smith (DE), Preston Smith (DE). Coach: Matt LaFleur. GM: Brian Gutekunst. Owner: “The fans.” Notes: Has started a hall-of-famer at quarterback every season since before you were born. Winning big but the analytics say they’re getting a bit lucky lately.

NFC South:

Atlanta Falcons. Key players: Matt Ryan (QB), Julio Jones (WR), I forgot the new WR’s name but he looks legit, Todd Gurley (RB). Coach that was recently fired: Dan Quinn. Notes: Have become known for inexplicably blowing enormous leads late in games. It’s quite funny, at this point.

New Orleans Saints. Key players: Drew Brees (QB), Michael Thomas (WR), Alvin Kamara (RB), Taysom Hill (listed as backup QB but just kinda does weird shit on offense), Jameis Winston (backup QB), Cam Jordan (DE), I should remember the cornerback’s name. Coach: Sean Payton. Notes: Known for having tons of talent every year, salary cap be damned, and then losing in heartbreaking fashion in the playoffs. Brees is getting old.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Key players: Tom Brady (QB), Mike Evans (WR), Chris Godwin (WR), this one WR who can go eat shit, Rob Gronkowski (TE), Antoine Winfield Jr (S), Vita Vea (DI). Coach: Bruce Arians. Notes: Signed Tom Brady. It’s working pretty well. Defense is top-tier. The most balanced team.

god, who is the other NFC south team, uh...  hold on, lemme get back to you.

AFC North:

Baltimore Ravens

Pittsburgh Steelers

Cleveland Browns

um... Cincinnati Bengals? Maybe?

AFC East:

New York Jets

New England Patriots

Miami Dolphins

Buffalo Bills

AFC South:

Houston Texans

Jacksonville Jaguars

Tennessee Titans

uhh... Indianapolis Colts.

AFC West:

Denver Broncos

Kansas City (I think this name should be changed too, honestly)

Las Vegas Raiders

I guess this must be the Los Angeles Chargers?

Oh, so the other NFC South team is the Carolina Panthers. Of course. Key players: Teddy Bridgewater (QB), Christian McCaffrey (RB and also arguably their best receiver), Yetur Gross-Matos (DE). Coach: Matt Rhule. Notes: Rebuilding their team this year, but quietly doing pretty well, considering.

Alright, I’m gonna stop there. Didn’t even get to the other half of the NFL, let alone started to try and list NBA/MLB/NHL teams, which would have gone extremely poorly. Story for another day.

Also, uh, yeah, this is a normal amount to know about football as someone who doesn’t watch football, oooobviously...