#{codependency at it's best}

[go-fornicate-yourself]

Every day I am in the trenches fighting for my life defending this poor man. He was going through so much and people online demonize him and say he's as bad as his abuser

(I've got a lot of thoughts about this so I'll make sure to separate things to make it easier to look at lol)

Curly is a victim of abuse. Jimmy is his abuser. This is something that I feel a lot of people tend to brush over or don't acknowledge it often.

And I'm not just talking about post-crash. Jimmy's abuse of Curly is there pre-crash too. The party scene where the crew learns about the company going under is a huge example of this. Jimmy verbally abuses him, he gaslights him, he blames him for their (his) misfortune. Jimmy accuses Curly of thinking he's better than everyone (better than him), that he doesn't care about them (about him). That he's going leave them (leave him). Which is not true. Curly tries to explain himself but Jimmy shuts him down and he just takes it.

The fact that he just allows this to happen makes it seem like he's used to this... That this kind of behavior is a recurring thing with Jimmy. And the fact that nobody else tries to defend him or stands up to Jimmy just normalizes it for him. When Anya tells Curly what Jimmy did it catches him off guard. Bc he genuinely didn't think that his friend was capable of that. It wasn't something that was obvious to him. There were absolutely many red flags in the past but they were subtle enough for him to not see them bc he cares for Jimmy, he trusts him. Jimmy's the only one he feels he can open up to, who he can let his guard down with. Jimmy's his home. That's how close they are.

Because of this deep love for his friend and the subtlety of Jimmy's cruelty, he doesn't see the constant verbal and emotional abuse as what it is: abuse. Which is why he finds Jimmy's abuse towards Anya so shocking and jarring.

He isn't a man covering for his rapist friend bc of the 'bro code'. It does look like that from a certain angle and it's understandable why people see it that way but that's not what his character is really about as much as it makes sense otherwise.

He's essentially a battered housewife who's still in love with her husband but is realizing for the first time that the man she loves is a monster. That the man she loves and devoted her life to has been hurting her this whole time and she didn't even realize it. That the man she loves and spent so much of her life caring for has gone and hurt someone else. That he's most likely hurt others before and she's been utterly unaware of it the entire time she defended him and made excuses for him when he wasn't the best or the fairest or the most responsible or when he screwed up yet again solely bc of how much she loved and cared for him.

And Curly barely had any time to process ANY of that before Jimmy decided to try and kill them all to avoid the consequences of his actions. It was ultimately a selfish act even if he thought he wasn't just doing it for himself. Jimmy is selfish and needs to be in control or he loses it. He cares for Curly. He loves him. Curly's done so much for him. Curly's the only one who understands him, who doesn't hate him. Curly's his home. He resents how 'successful' he is but that's only bc he thinks so highly of him. He constantly puts himself down and put Curly on a pedestal and worships him while simultaneously mistreating him.

He treats his best friend like shit, he's awful to him. But he's not aware that this is the case or maybe he's in denial about it. He can't or just refuses to see how he's doing all of what he does for himself in the end. He justifies his attempt to kill them all (to himself and to Curly) by claiming he's doing this for them both. That if they were to get back to earth it would all be Curly's fault, that it'll ruin his life and career... despite the fact he had basically nothing to do with Anya's abuse. Jimmy's shifting the blame on him while acting like he cares for him. Well, he does genuinely care for him but clearly not nearly enough to not mistreat him or use him as a scapegoat for his own guilt.

Jimmy is the rapist, Jimmy is the one who does all of these horrible things. And yet it's highly likely that Curly would just blame all of it on himself bc that's exactly what Jimmy did to him. He's in so deep he can't see the facts of the situation.

It takes abuse victims so long to come to terms with their abuse. It takes time and reflection to see things with an unbiased and healthy perspective. Abuse (especially years of it) isn't just something you can just escape. It consumes you and can twist your reality. Curly had about a week or less to process all of it and then take action in a way that protected his crew and abided by Pony Express' guidelines. Dealing with something this serious in a setting that makes resolving it extremely difficult in a practical sense is already hard.

There were no locks on any of the doors except for medical and the cockpit. They couldn't just kill him. There was nowhere they could detain Jimmy that wouldn't involve corporate potentially penalizing the entire group. They could have used the cryopods but then there'd only be three available for any actual emergency and there were already five crew members and four pods in total. Also, I doubt corporate would be 'okay' with them using the cryopods for anything other than their intended purpose. Hell, even if they were able to make it back to earth without any incidents there's a good chance that corporate would consider the situation 'poor team synergy' and collectively punish the entire crew for Jimmy's actions.

So on top of having to deal with an already difficult situation, Curly has to grapple with the realization that Jimmy a: abused Anya, b: has been abusing him as well (for a very long time too), and c: has probably abused others before Anya and he had no idea about it. He needed to act but he didn't and it doomed all of them.

But it's so unrealistic (maybe even cruel) to put that much pressure on someone, force them through an utterly earth-shattering realization, and then expect them to do the correct/right/responsible thing in that moment. It's a little ironic how people vilify him for that when other characters do the same thing that nobody blames for it.

Anya is the ship's nurse. Curly is the ship's captain. They both have duties and responsibilities on board the Tulpar. She has to keep the crew healthy and safe and is the only one with enough medical knowledge to do so. He has to make sure that everything goes well and goes according to procedure. He's responsible for the crew, the cargo, and even the ship itself. Both positions are integral and require a lot of responsibility to do properly

They're both put through distressing and traumatic situations where due to them being human people with emotions and fears that make them essentially avoid their responsibility/doing what's required of them.

Curly has a freeze response and doesn't act when he should have when it was crucial to have done so. Anya has a fawn response and essentially puts her patient in danger and harm's way. She knew full well what Jimmy was capable of. She experienced it herself and she witnessed it happening to Curly as well. And yet she allows Jimmy to be alone with Curly while being fully aware of how dangerous he is. Which she shouldn't have, that wasn't the 'right' thing to do. Keeping him safe was her responsibility.

But Anya's human. She's going through a lot at the moment. She's terrified of Jimmy and she's trying to appease him so he doesn't hurt her again. It's a natural very understandable thing to do even if it's not the 'right' or 'responsible' thing. They failed each other when they needed each other most and I think that's the most tragic part of it. If anything, all of them failed each other in some way, shape, or form.

So it's incredibly frustrating to see people give Anya so much sympathy and grace for doing something so human yet still 'wrong' but then turn around and give Curly none of that for doing essentially the same thing she does.

I don't know for sure if it's actually because Curly is a man or if it's only part of it or maybe some people just lack that sense of awareness but it's depressing and frustrating as fuck as a male victim of sexual violence and abuse to see this kind of behavior and this much victim blaming towards a character who is undeniably a victim of abuse like I am.

[weirdglassthing]

Youll never guess what I started!!

While watching the first episode I forced myself to figure out how to draw rett and it paid off look at him!!

Avantris singlehandedly forcing me to learn how to draw men

Silhouettes because they look shockingly baddass, Barbie pyke because Jesus do not leave his hair unrendered, and the sketch because I find it funny

[necromycologist]

rip ianthe tridentarius... born to be the one and only fucked up failgirl forced to somehow end up as the voice of reason

[thepeacefulgarden]

You deserve happiness. You deserve safety and security. You deserve healthy relationships. You deserve support. You deserve love of all kinds, from yourself and others. You deserve to feel good. You deserve a job or career that's satisfying, and that doesn't make you dread going in every day. You deserve rest. You deserve nourishment. You deserve the same love and care you so freely give to other people. You deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. You deserve to feel at home in your body. You deserve credit for your small wins as well as your big ones. You deserve to honor your progress. You deserve time for you. You deserve to forgive yourself for your mistakes. You deserve to learn and grow. And you deserve these things no matter what.

[yaksinhats]

POV: You agreed to spar with Lae'zel

Arthur&Lae'zel thoughts: Lae'zel is Arthur's best friend. They don't talk much, and when they do it's really mostly about battle strategies. He feels very comfortable being around her because having no memories makes him like a fish out of water, and she makes him feel not so afraid to make awkward social gaffes around her because she also doesn't understand the world she's landed in! (He really really really relates to her when she mispronounced Faerun 🥺) Their friendship becomes really deep when he comes more clean about his urges and she offers to train with him to help him control his urges in battle. Also, because he is someone who lies so much and has such a fractured sense of identity, having a friend who doesn't lie to him, doesn't pay meaningless compliments, and believes in his inner strength and ability to overcome the obstacles he faces is extremely important to him and his journey. She's ultimately the person who stops him from becoming the absolute - he can't bring himself to betray Lae'zel in such a significant way. On the flip side, I think Arthur forces Lae'zel to re-examine her own motivations and convictions. He's a walking liability: he lies constantly, and is not in control of his actions, and is actively seeking dominance of the netherbrain she needs to destroy for githyanki freedom. I like to think the night Arthur tries to kill Astarion at last light, she realizes the Smart and Correct thing for a githyanki warrior to do would be to dispatch of him, but she does not, and it really starts to make her view her relationships with people in a new way.

[pepperpixel]

SAID HE LIKES CRAZY GIRLS,

BUT HE HATES WHEN I ACT CRAZY,

IT TAKES TWO TO TOXIC!

FINALLY!!! Finished these pics of jinx I’ve been working on!!!!! HOLY SHIT, these took so long…. But finally… they’re done… pls enjoy this art of my beautiful princess w a disorder. Featuring alternate colors for the big pic and also a closeup! Cuz I rlly like how both the lines and coloring on her face turned out… like the pink gradients w her eye… her deer in headlights expression,, like uve just startled a raccoon digging thru ur trashcan and r two seconds away from getting mauled.. m proud of it!

[saddest-girl-in-the-whole-world]

maybe a bit of a weird thing to post during alectopause but honestly I'm a little excited about the fandom after the series is finished for good. Maybe it's just because of how I engage with most fandoms on this site but there's something to be said about a ""dead"" fandom, yknow?

Being able to discuss a story in its entirety, critical analysis (and loving a story despite whatever flaws you find in it), tamsyn writing a different book and the more personal interactions within a fandom past its peak are some of my favourite things about getting into fandoms on this website, it's great!

But hey, maybe I'm just a weirdo that's a bit too much into a dead body

[friendsdontlieokay]

Siblings who are actually best friends but will never admit it:

Best friends who are actually siblings but will never admit it:

[f1-birb]

just two 🤏 boys

[mamawasatesttube]

timcassie is so compelling to me. they were not into each other even a little bit. it was such a messy coping mechanism fuelled entirely by grief. they were making out with each other because they were both substituting each other for kon. cassie was far more aware she was doing this than tim was. unironically, dating a girl here is one of the gayest things tim has done

[ggardengirl]

you could be my best friend

yellowjackets (2021) x “best friend,” the staves

[manicpixiedreamedwins]

Charles Rowland makes me sad this, Charles Rowland needs therapy that— Charles Rowland makes me feel seen.

It’s okay Charles, I understand you. You’re my best boy.

[thepeacefulgarden]

[mikeslawyer]

established mike and will regularly have the i love you more, no, i love you more argument that doesn’t end until the someone from the party tells them to shut the fuck up after an hour

[singsofecho]

kih'vode belong upside down

[watery-melon-baller]

theres people who only have one ship and people who don't have any ships and multishippers well im inventing a new kind of shipper and it's "all of these people are gay and a little in love with each other but the romance is up to interpretation"