#{ saying not to listen to it and stuff }

[11thsense]

The dead surround the living

[newttxt]

more goofy-silly sabokoby ☺️

[potato-lord-but-not]

ep 50 save me

[inkskinned]

i'm still trying to piece together the truth of it. when you left, you said: feel free to spin this narrative however you want. i have no idea if you were being cruel or if you just genuinely don't remember what you've done to me.

it's hard because i'd done so much of the work for you. i had seen the parts that flaked off, the rust underneath. i started separating you into two people - the one i loved, and the one who hurt me. i had this fantasy version of you - my partner - and then i had this stranger, a third person who would show up randomly to shatter me. i am deliriously glad i'm no longer with "the stranger". i miss the gentle (unreal?) "other" you terribly.

at first, i was so strict about my boundaries. i remember telling you to get the fuck out of my house if you were going to talk to me like that. by the end: i would justify your behavior for you, accepting even your mistreatment as "my fault" in the grand scheme. i look back on the person i was before you - smart, independent, confident - and i feel a strange sense of detachment. i don't even recognize me.

even in one of our last conversations, you said: if you want a partner that always talks warmly to you, find someone else. there was a time that a comment like that would have made me leave. and instead, somehow, i just placidly accepted that kind of thing. you were literally telling me that i wasn't allowed to have a reaction to your cruelty - and i just took it, because you'd so fully turned things around on me.

when people are faced with irrationality, a rational brain tries to make sense of it. this is the trap. they're lovely in the morning, gentle and blue-eyed and sweet. like nothing even happened, they breeze around the house and kiss you on the mouth. but at night; who is that? they snap almost randomly; flying into an impotent rage about just-about-anything. it just doesn't make sense. so the problem must be me, and my brain, and how i think.

the traumatized brain just wants peace. so maybe i'm misremembering. maybe you were just having a bad day. maybe it's actually me.

you eventually would fully turn on me and start implying that i am the bad actor in our relationship. that's what happens, right? that's literally in the playbook. you went to therapy for all of a month, told her a half-truth, co-opted therapyspeak. you figured out how to reframe your actions as "seeking peace." any time i stood my ground, i was "gaslighting." when i asked you to be more gentle, you said i was "tone policing." you said, randomly, i had emotionally manipulated you - i still have no idea what that's even specifically referring to. maybe my consistent requests for calmness and empathy?

and while i literally know better, and i'm sitting here, trained by you, thinking: wait, fuck. was i actually the person you made me out to be?

and the thing that scares me is that i literally do not know if you ever actually saw what you were doing to me. when you'd tell me how you remember arguments, you'd always summarize them in a way where you come off as gentle and easy: "i was trying to set an important boundary." what had actually happened was 15 minutes of you shouting at me i know you did something shady, just admit it already. eventually you'd say my reaction to your shouting (when i finally reacted, which usually happened around hour three) was inevitably "disappointing" and "another way i'm silencing your feelings."

how many times did i ask you - beg you - to just take accountability? looking back, i don't think i ever heard you say: you're right. the way i talked to you was wrong of me.

i am trying to tie together the two people into a full version of you in my head. yes, you made my coffee and made me laugh and spent hours on the phone with me. and yes - you would scream at me until i had to run away and hide behind something.

i wish i did have a narrative i could pull out and shape to my whim. i wish i did have some semblance of reality. instead i just stand here, strange and vibrating, wondering: what the fuck just happened?

[kazz-brekker]

dune part 2 really is one of those films where everyone is like "this is the best thing ever" and you're like "it can't possibly be" and then you watch it and spend 2 hours and 46 minutes understanding why paul atreides has a cult the size of a planet

[captaincalamity]

the thing that pisses me off about the minecraft movie is how boring it is (or will be). people have consistently proven that complex stories and ideas can be conveyed through minecraft, with it not just acting as a backdrop- instead we get jumanji: block edition and it’s so annoying. minecraft is a beautiful game that has brought so many people together, that influenced countless childhoods, and this is what we get? i’m pretty sure it’s going to be the same plot as fucking angry birds.

this movie is taking all the momentum that countless creatives have provided to minecraft for 15 years and acknowledging NONE of it. you can have your opinions of mcyters but at least they have the guts to tell a story.

fuck, maybe my expectations were too high- but it’s hard to not expect more when we consistently got more from way weirder sources. things like stampys lovely world, the fallen kingdom saga, dantdms lab, hermitcraft, the dsmp and qsmp, genuinely every minecraft let’s play has SOME form of story- it’s just disappointing to see mojang fail to create a better story when they’ve had so many examples.

the world has MUCH bigger problems right now, but it’s still upsetting- i was born right in time to grow up with minecraft. and while im not surprised, i am disappointed.

[roublardise]

6x01 - Exile on Main St.

presented without commentary bc where do i even start.

being so distress at the idea his heterosexual relationship could have been avoided ? making it sound like he made some kind of huge effort he didn't have to (to be a with a beautiful woman for a year ?) only reason he went to these concepts (a woman. a kid.) is out of exterior motivation/pressure. ok!!

[royalarchivist]

Tallulah: tio pac and fit are so Perfecta by Miranda coded 🥹💕

Phil: This is Pac and Fit? [Dramatically zooms-in on the fanart and makes them "sing" along to the music]

Chat: he's LITERALLY making a ship amv right now

Tallulah: How things got weird 😞

Make sure to show love to the artist who drew this fanart!

[ Full clip ]

[kiatnirans]

Sorry. You're not mad at me, are you? Why would I? I already knew that. What? Of course I knew. You only pretended to like it to get close to me, but you're not into it. You're more into pop rock music.

THE HEART KILLERS (2024-2025) เขาจ้างให้ผมจีบนักฆ่า dir. Jojo Tichakorn Phukhaotong

[bumblingbabooshka]

Thinking about marriage/women's rights on Vulcan Some may think that T'Pring not being allowed to divorce Spock was because he was going through the pon farr but if she were allowed to divorce him at all she probably would have done that a long time ago, confirmed by T'Pol when she's speaking with Koss, who isn't suffering from the pon farr. She says that he can choose another mate (without invoking a fight it seems: note the difference between a 'mate' and a 'challenger') and after he makes it clear that nothing she says will change his mind about marrying her, she finally threatens to declare a kal-if-fee. It's clear that Vulcan women cannot divorce/refuse to marry a man they've been betrothed to under any circumstances if A) He himself doesn't consent to ending their marriage or B) She doesn't have someone else waiting in the wings to be given to in his stead. Though, if the challenger she selects fails to win the fight, she'll have to marry her betrothed anyway unless (again) he decides he doesn't want her after the challenge. That seems like an incredibly unfair system, heavily biased towards men. SNW is an alternate universe in many obvious respects but most egregiously in that T'Pring has a lot of non-canonical agency over her relationship with Spock. It's interesting to me that Vulcan society has women in many positions of power and treats women as equal to men from what I've seen despite these laws. We don't really see Vulcans exhibiting a misogynistic attitude towards women in general but in TOS (perhaps because of its general writing style but it's still interesting to note) both Sarek and Spock take on patriarchal attitudes specifically regarding wives. Amanda says that 'of course' Sarek commands her because "he is a Vulcan and I am his wife." It's worthwhile in my eyes to note that she specifies 'wife' instead of attributing this attitude to women as a whole. Again, with TOS' writing style it wouldn't be out of place for her to say "he is a man and I am a woman." Spock, while in a pon farr induced irritation, states that it's "undignified for a woman to play servant to a man that isn't hers" - again implying that there's something specific about being a Wife in Vulcan society which is different from being a woman in general and demands subservience to a husband. This could perhaps stem from the extreme sense of ownership that Vulcan law has permitted men to have over women. A woman legally cannot point blank refuse marriage. There is no option which guarantees she won't have to marry her betrothed other than death. When T'Pau speaks of T'Pring she refers to her as being 'property' and Stonn, before being interrupted, states he's made 'the ancient claim' - we don't know what this is because he gets cut off but it's obvious they're both using the language of Vulcan law. Men are permitted true freedom to choose. If a woman wants to choose someone else to be with there is no option available to her other than the kal-if-fee which might result in the death of the one she wants to be with. And, if her lover fails, her husband can still just decide he wants to marry her and she'll be forced to. T'Pring gives two scenarios: One where Spock 'frees' her and one where he doesn't - it's still ultimately his decision which is clear when he ends the conversation with "Stonn, she is yours." This again isn't just because of the pon farr as T'Pol also goes through this. Koss can choose another mate and when the option is talked about there's no implication that this would result in any sort of fight (both by the casualness of its mention and by the fact that there's no formal word for it unlike the kal-if-fee.) Also, the fact that Koss does eventually grant T'Pol a divorce and it's all fine means that T'Pol isn't lawfully required to have another man waiting if her HUSBAND doesn't want her. It's ONLY required if SHE doesn't want her husband. Tradition must take precedence over individual desire UNLESS!!! You're a man. Then it's fine. Like, your parents might not be happy but legally you're golden.

[ganondoodle]

(WIP) for totk rewritten project; the underground zora queen!

a littel bit ago i wrote about my rewrite of the dungeons, and in case you didnt read through that wall of text; the zora one takes palce entirely underground in large, mostly water filled caves and the ancient zora waterworks which here are essential to the surface zora even if they didnt know and have been maintained by a group of now distinctly different zoras that grew from a group of ancient zora that were cut off from the sruface at some point and since then forgotten

now with the cataclysm changing the map drastically, which dries up the zoras domain, connection from the caves to the sruface has been restablished- on your way to get the water going again you explore the udnerground and here, uniquely, you find and fight these different zoras, they have been seperated so long you cannot communicate with them and you are invading their territory in a time of crisis (bc they are trying to keep the waterworks intact/ survive), the bossfight being with their queen (of comparable size to dorephan) and you either gaining her respect or (havent decided yet) sidon healing her after she goes down (since his reworked ability is a shield+ healing)

after the dungeon the cave zora will appear over the whole map, but only at night as they are adapted to the dark and sun would damage them

(it mixes up the thing of dungeons being just filled with monsters that need to be eradicated with a conflict between two kinds of zora that dont understand each other anymore- ALSO explains more and different zora npcs appearing much more easily imo)

[l3viat8an]

It would be hilarious if in the new game Michael is added as a dateable.

(He should be right there when the royals, purgatory hall boys, Thirteen ‘n Mephisto are added imo)

But seriously think about it! Michael just skips all the awkward flirting moments ‘n any kind of dating- just to go straight to marriage!!! Very angelic if you ask me lolol

[likesdoodling]

I have finished The Angst Version™~ (of chapter 50 of The Harrowing by @chthonion >:D) The bonus chapter added some stuff/re-inspired me, which is all to the good imo~ gotta get that Maximum Angst Factor AMMIRIGHT?? >:D (also. Mostly paraphrasing stuff just so you're aware~)

Then we got some of the conversation~ (without dialogue, 'cause a picture tells a thousand words~ >:D)

Then a sketch that was completely inspired by the bonus chapter-

It's not as 'polished' as the other ones, I just had thoughts about that tidbit and decided I absolutely had to mention it- so it got a drawing to match. :D

And finally, because I don't want to end this on too depressing a note-

:')

I'm not crying, you are.

My personal favourites include Extra Angry Maedhros + hands over the face Annatar, - then- actually. y'know what? I can't pick favourites. I like them all too much to do that. But that was the 'segment' that I experimented on - to try and convey the emotions through how chaotic/forceful the lines were, and it worked exactly how I wanted it to. Which is very satisfying.

>:D

(also, I don't think Maedhros was quite that visibly angry in the actual chapter, but it's supposed to be a mix of that plus Annatar's perception of him/what made Annatar panic. Make of that what you will. Eheh. Eheh. Eheh. >:D)

[lunabug2004]

Btw Will is the only one who's actively proven to Mike that he cares for him by actually listening to his worries without judging him or blowing them off. Just btw.

[unhappy-sometimes]

here's a playlist of (mostly) historically accurate love songs that twiyor has most definitely danced to on vinyl: youtube, spotify, apple music

some fast, some slow, some made for dancing, others probably not (but i still like them so i included them anyway), i'll add songs as i think of them

[haggz-is-here]

other variations of the “Tell me, Godly one, do you crave more?” drawing thing 💥💥💥

(while drawing it, many things were added but then taken away in the whole process of things. so here are the cooler ones that still deserve a spot 💕)