#^mentally ill in the worst way

[sugarflow]

YES. YESS.. YEAHHHHHHHHHH

[mushramoo]

I hate that having ADHD is seen as “quirky”. Or one of the “lesser” mental disorders.

It is agonizing.

You are constantly forgetting everything, names, locations, tasks, items, everything. You misplace things subconsciously and have to spend half hours looking for them, only to find them in places you genuinely cannot recall at all. Your memory is nonexistent. You are constantly aware that you have things you need to do or need to be doing but you cannot remember what. You know you are forgetting something but it doesn’t come to you, so you spend all day anxious. You get awful moments of dysfunction where words become incomprehensible and you are incapable of completing a task, but people are quick to assume you are lazy no matter how hard you’re trying. And one of the worst parts is that you KNOW you’re letting people down. You know you can’t grasp time so you’re showing up late even though you left extremely early. You know someone expected something from you by a deadline but you genuinely couldn’t remember. And in academics, you know some of your teachers are trying hard to be accommodating but you can’t even do the most basic tasks by the given deadlines. Or! You get teachers that do not even understand what mental disorders are and accuse you of not trying. People think you are using your disorder as an excuse just because you know you have it and use it to explain some of your behaviors. If you mask well enough to never need help, you don’t get diagnosed even though it’s taking all of your strength just to get by. If you don’t mask well enough and you are fem presenting like I am you are told you aren’t acting out so you are fine. You can’t win. It’s not quirky to have ADHD, and we aren’t faking it.

It’s a constant struggle, and I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone.

[necrotic-nephilim]

If you want to be bothered. Maybe this for dick and Bruce???

i ALWAYS want to be bothered these are always the highlight of my day tbh you're a delight for letting me just yap <3

Dick. For the canon isn't real square I am Specifically talking about the Tom Taylor Nightwing run. Usually I ignore bad runs but given this one is ongoing (though about to end THANK GOD and get replaced by Dan Watters who i have high hopes for since i adored his Sword of Azrael (2022) run but i digress) so I counted it. Especially since it's so debated if that run is bad or not, for some reason. I'm a 90s Nightwing truther. I love Dick so dearly and tbh recently I've been more enamored with him the more I read his Discowing era, I didn't used to be as big of a Dick stan as I am these days.

Bruce. Honestly where do you even start with Bruce. I want to fist fight him and also patch him up. He got me into comics and superheroes as a whole but I roll my eyes whenever he shows up in a story. He's a bastard and usually not a good father but also complex and should be dissected under a magnifying glass. I love him dearly. He's also just the worst. I think that's why I love him. I'm always a fan of unabashedly Complicated Asshole Bruce who's generally not always the best person, particularly not to the Batfamily and that being the driving force of his relationships with them, especially in shipping.

And for bonus points, Tim. Because know above all else, I'm a Tim Drake kinnie /deg. He's been my number one for a decade and I've yet to uproot him from my brain. He's literally the Worst half the time and I love him for it. And the canon isn't real refers to Tim Drake: Robin because... that sure was a comic. And that's about all I can say about it. Pre-Flashpoint Tim I miss you so dearly. I think it's fun that I want to put him in a blender and drink the juice but also want Nothing Ever to happen to him.

[fazgoo-connoiseur-1987]

Henry's whole deal to me is that he is selfish in his inaction, his self preservation, his desire for closure. His self hatred is all consuming in such a way that it harms those around him but he is so consumed by his own misery he does not recognise their suffering. His anger at himself, William and the world animates him but also gnaws at every inch of his being like a virus. Spreds from him into the world. Seeps and harms and burns the way Will's actions burned him.

[cj-kenobi]

sometimes you have a rough day and have to fall asleep directly on top of your battle boyfriend giving him as many dead limbs in the process as possible

[naivety]

okay i need feedback from the autism mentall illness website um. this is going to read like an AITA post. brother vs half-sister (who are currently my dependents do to their own individual disabilities + ptsd/depression) spat i will skim the details on but i'm worried my sister will discount my take since i'm not autistic myself so. am i crazy to call it ableist to look at an autistic person (23) who is clearly going through it dealing w long term depression, a world that doesn't give a shit abt him, unemployment, very self-isolated and burnt out barely leaving his room because the world is an ableist dumpster fire with zero opportunities for him, and then bring up childhood abuse he's suffered and his diagnosis as reasonable factors on top of this to worry he'll [checks notes] abuse my cat just to hurt me or even worse have a breakdown and kill me and his other sibling in a violent episode, a train of thought i probably wouldn't even be having were he not [checks notes] mad at me for the first time in my life?

like i don't have any other read on this kind of fear-based characterization other than ableism. like those are very real things in his life but she never points out any current violent behavior, of which there are none, only the one (1) instance of him lashing out when he was like 14 and Officially Diagnosed Low Empathy she thinks is a concern and Hateful Looks toward her since he stopped getting along with her, that's it. i tried explaining to her why i, someone who's lived w him his entire life, can vouch for how unlikely he is to do anything like that, especially when it's again not based on anything he's actually currently doing except for isolating in a way that is much more indicative of him potentially being a danger to himself than anyone else, and being cold towards her specifically, and i thought she had let it go, but when i brought it up off-hand in a conversation tangentially related, she continued to defend and justify her Concern about the potential directions his behavior could lead to because [checks notes] other people in similar situations have lashed out and killed their entire families according to. true crime books or videos she's watched on youtube as far as i'm aware. ignoring the fact that her and i have had the same or Worse childhood abuse and have acted similarly isolated in the past, or for her literally just as currently as him, and she's not expressed any worry past or present about either of us doing anything like that, in my opinion obviously because i haven't cut her off due to our differences like he decided to. like am i big sibling biased because this is pissing me off so bad.

[milksteakkk]

sweet fluffy treebros is great nd everything and i could totally see it but also. i think they should be a teeny bit horribly toxic

[wickjump]

i kinda want to live again

[b-blushes]

thursday quest - no physical therapy today - make and eat lunch sooooo early but i can do it!!!!! - get ready for wedding - attend wedding! yay! (: - decompress well when i get home <3

[wesdoesliterallynothing]

Malcolm Bright, a man desperately pursuing his own destruction merely because he was born

Tw: Needle, Suicide, Grooming and Prodigal Son Spoilers (and it's related triggers)

Malcolm Bright kneeling himself in front of a serial killer who is mimicking his father, the man who tried to groom him into a being just like him, haunting him even after ten years of no contact, and offering himself to be killed. Malcolm Bright, kneeling in front of a serial, confessing his parentage in front of someone who has so far had an untainted opinion of him.

The moment he admits to being The Surgeon's son, Martin's son, how it hurts him to say.

Malcolm Bright, hoping to kill two birds with one stone, get rid of himself, ending all the torment at the hands of the closest thing to his father, and saving a life while doing it. Holding a needle to his wrist, all but begging this killer to kill him instead.

His disappointment is palpable, so very clear when he isn't killed, painfully, excruciatingly. The serum had been perfected, the most painful way to die, and Malcolm was on his knees for it. And Gil saw it, Gil knew, seeing that face. How many times had Gil seen that face? How many times had Malcolm tried something similar? How many times had he felt that same fear? Gil has known Malcolm for 20 years, through the worst times in his life, how many times had he seen Malcolm like this?

Malcolm Bright is one of the most self-destructive characters I have ever seen, from moments like these where he intentionally puts his life in danger, hoping for a moment where it ends, disappointed when it doesn't end with him dead. To moments where he sabotages his own relationships, pushing people away, lying and making himself out to be this horrible burden to everyone, to be this danger to be around.

Malcolm Bright has always been afraid of himself, of being what his father tried to groom him into, so deeply into that belief that his father succeeded and that he’s such a terrible person, merely for existing, for being the son of the surgeon. Malcolm is fully under the belief that he deserves pain and even death for what his father did, he’s so afraid of hurting people, of being like his father. Everything he does is penance of being alive, hoping to make up for the risk of him still being around. He’s so scared, even of death itself. Malcolm, generally speaking, tends to be passively suicidal, having shown fear of death and being hurt, but it’s moments like these that you really see how far he’s willing to go to keep everyone else safe, and how deeply this fear goes. How ready he is to lay down his life.  But that's just my two cents

[klapollo]

now that she's on this I'm Insaaaane Asyyyylum trip do you think taylor swift getting diagnosed with a stigmatized personality disorder would be a net good because of visibility or a net negative because it'd just become "the thing taylor swift has"

[stellerssong]

ok sorry the OTHER thing about lucienne is like. as previously stated she is dream's handpicked emissary from the waking world to the dreaming she's the diplomat in chief she's the translator she's the bridge. because the dreaming is, in a very real way, dream's own psyche, this is tantamount to giving lucienne a tremendous degree of access to his interiority and by transitive property also tantamount to entering into a deeply emotionally intimate relationship with her (unimportant for the purposes of this post whether that relationship is platonic or romantic).

now, in general, looking at the pattern of dream's close emotional relationships—dream doesn't share himself with people as a rule (beyond the access that all things that live have to the dreaming; but i'm talking about his self here, the one he doesn't like to acknowledge he even has), but when he does share with people, it's with people who have some shadow on the soul, so to speak. just looking at attested relationships in show canon, his deepest emotional connection seems to be with death, who embodies the duality of light and dark even better than he does himself. calliope is the muse of epic poetry—heroism and tragedy—and also bears the sort of divine pride that led her to cut dream off for hundreds or thousands of years when he wronged her. the less said about that other guy, the better, but he's no sunshine-rainbows-unicorns type—he's a soldier of fortune, a bandit and a killer, a man who profits from the sale of human life. even best bird matthew, in comix canon, had a sordid past that will maybe be partially retconned for the show but has still been gestured at.

dream likes the complicated ones. he's drawn to them. they speak to something in him that he won't acknowledge in himself (he has to be Whole, fully integrated, without reservation, because he is the king and he is the dreaming and if the dreaming ain't whole then the universe is in trouble—but he feels that ache nonetheless).

all that is to say: when people try to portray lucienne as dream's Designated Well-Adjusted Neurotypical Friend, i begin to harm and maim.

[bbqhooligan]

the way people respond to the "omg you people cant do anything" tweet with "holy shit this rewired me" "fixed me" "sometimes i need to remember this tweet and i immediately get better" makes me so mad. im glad it helps you man. it just irritates me cuz more often than not im the people who cant do anything. at least being mocked and shamed functions to motivate you out of your problems. this is so healthy for all of us

[moe-broey]

Lif voice KILL YOURSELF NOW‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

[anarcho-masochist]

Do you know what sucks? All of the mental hospitals near me. I've only been to one good mental hospital in my entire life and it is really far away. Why do all of the nearby mental hospitals have to be downright terrible? It wouldn't even be difficult to do a better job than half these places. Yeah, some people will always hate mental hospitals because they are restrictive, but there are some serious issues that are extremely avoidable.

Don't hire staff that hate mentally ill people. Also, treat patients like actual people and not like you're babysitting someone's problem child violent criminal drug addict horror movie psychopath pit bull puppy with a bite history and no ability to think who definitely caused their own problems anyway and should probably just be incarcerated or put down or else they'll just continue to be both an inconvenience and Scary.

If you confiscate a patient's belongings and say you will return them when the patient gets discharged, do so and keep track of the items, do not throw them away.

Provide food options without ingredients that commonly trigger allergies. (The last mental hospital I went to had no gluten-free options for probably 2/3 of the meals so I ended up barely eating. Usually, the only GF option was salad or fruit and even their salads had croutons already mixed in and soggy enough that even if you picked them out, the cross-contamination was significant. The only protein source was meat and 100% of it was breaded. I wish this was hyperbole.)

If you have to deal with a situation where a patient is being violent: 1. attempt to de-escalate and only resort to force when absolutely necessary 2. do not insult or yell at the patient 3. do not insult or yell at a different patient with PTSD who had a panic attack after the first patient threw a chair at them 4. do not punish a third patient by taking away their media time because they intervened and successfully calmed down both the first and second patient.

Do not sexually harass trans minors. Do not subject a 16-year-old transmasc patient to a "cavity search" and then lie about it when the other patients confront you because the kid brought it up and after discussion, none of the cis or adult patients had to do anything like that but the trans AFAB minors (there were two) both faced some form of sexual harassment. Do not revoke phone privileges to the (several) patients who suggested a lawsuit. Do not take down the patients' rights poster in the hallway. Do not lie to patients about their rights. Do not threaten to out patients to their transphobic and abusive parents if they try to report the hospital. Do not give the patients who suggested a lawsuit smug looks for the entire next week as if you are superior because the patients backed down due to the victims not wanting to come forward about it anymore because they had no solid proof and, for one of them, because his parents would hurt him if they found out, which they would.

You would think this would be common sense, and yet, there are no mental hospitals within two hours of my house that haven't done at least one of these things.

Probably not worth it to try to look for farther away hospitals I haven't been to before considering that they're very unlikely to help anyway.

[uncanny-tranny]

So I saw this show I used to watch as a kid on a streaming service, Hoarders, and it's about, as you'd assume, people who compulsively hoard.

When I watched that show as a kid, I remember how you were invited to almost... judge these people, "Oh, how could you live like that?! I'm glad that's not my house..." and I remember this shock factor that sunk you into the episode, at least in the early seasons.

I think it's a product of the attitude we have about these sorts of things. When I look at that now, all I see is trauma, people who are suffering, and then essentially being shamed on television, no less. It just feels like watching somebody at their lowest for an hour, recounting trauma, disability, loss and grief, mental illness, and so many things.