#[ t: WHAT THE HELL ]
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butterscotchcakee · 4 months ago
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puppetmaster13u · 1 year ago
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Prompt 126
You know what would be hilarious? 
Constantine comes into one of those meetings as he sometimes does every blue moon. Though the proper word would be storms into a meeting and practically slams a whole stack of papers down. “Can someone bloody explain to me why the American-fucking-government is trying to go to war with the fucking Infinite Realms?!” 
The Justice League is of course alarmed and confused- and also John weren’t you in Hell?! Yeah, he was, where the fuck do you think he found out about this? 
Now if you’ll excuse him he’s going back to the House of Mysteries with his now haunted trench coat. John, John Constantine what the fuck do you mean by that? No don’t just leave, don’t leave this mess just for them- JOHN! 
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crazyprincesz · 5 months ago
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honeyspeeches · 1 year ago
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what if i reposted all of my klance art huh. what then.
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ef-1 · 2 years ago
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"A quick word for Dilano in Spa, it's a tragic day for motorsport, we lost a driver today, I just want everyone to think about that[...] Eau rouge and Spa needs some looking into because we've lost 2 drivers in a span of 4- 5 years, it's a really dangerous corner, we say it every year it's not fair what happened today"
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sulumuns-dootah · 5 months ago
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Taking the WHB demons (+ angels) to the Zoo
⟡ Masterlist ⟡ 
A/N: It's my b-day! And as a treat to myself I went to visit a local Zoo so ofc I'll write about how our demons (+ angels) would behave if they got to go too! ^^
Characters: All of the demons + the Seraphs
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With Satan in your group, you don't have to worry about being suffocated in a crowd of people. In a true Satan fashion, they all get a healthy dose of his boots to their behinds if they get even remotely close. And no, children are not safe from him.
Sitri is the snacks and drinks provider. No need to buy overpriced slushies and ice-cream when as soon as you get a craving, something sweet is being handed to you.
As unathletic as Leraye is, you'll see him speedwalking from an enclosure to enclosure. Oh, but if the Zoo has a tropical house with storm sounds for the immersive ambiance? Good luck getting him out of there.
Paimon takes photos of everything and anything. Every few enclosures has to take a break to pick out the best photos and delete the rest to clear out space for more.
Interestingly, Belial - or moreso Jjyu is really quiet. Maybe because someone told him that if he doesn't learn his manners, he might end up as food for one of the animals. This also might be the first time Belial has had such peace and quiet since he first got Jjyu.
Please, tell Astaroth to keep his snake at home in advance. The last thing anyone wants is to argue with the staff that it's really his snake and that he didn't steal it.
You barely notice Zagan even being there. Well, if he didn't leave his talismans everywhere, that is. Despite being practically expresionless, you can see him softly smile while watching animals do something cute.
Ppyong acts like a toddler. In the beginning he'll fly around all excited, happily exclaiming at the actions of the animals. Then he gets all tired and whiny, so Zagan someone has to carry him around. Once he's all rested up, it's back to square one
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"Oh, that's you favorite animal? M'kay, gimme a second to look up how much it costs." - Mammon
"Look at them, all they do is lay around and do nothing and we still have to pay to see them!" - Bimet
Eligos nearly buy out the plushies in the souvenir shop. Can't balme him, tho, they're usually super cute (and expensive x.x).
Do you feel guilty for dragging everyone around just to see your favorite animals? Valerfor is more than happy to be dragged around! Just give him enough time to read the info plaque so the two of you can have an interesting convo later.
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Oh boy is it hard to get Leviathan to come with you. And honestly, I wouldn't recommend at all. The people make him anxious and the fact that the animals get all of your attention instead of him? How he wishes he could hang them all.
Foras is probably the best Hades noble to visit with. He's eager to see all the animals the place has to offer. Also doesn't mind being dragged around.
Scheduling tip: make sure the day is overcast. If it's rainy, Barbatos will refuse to go anywhere. If it's sunny, there's no way you can keep his clothes on and with all the kids around... yikes.
Glasyalabolas will hang around the predators and vultures. If he's not there, he's probably about, scaring unattended children.
A Zoo is an amazing place to release Orias back into the wilderness. Just let him loose to disappear amongst all the other children at the playground. There's a chance that some unfortunate parent will mistake him for their own kid and take him home.
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Beelzebub is excited to try out all the food at the food court/restaurant within the Zoo. If there's a queue, he'll just walk up to the front. In such case is handy to have Satan with you to kick everyone out of the way.
Our poor Bael tries to coordinate the whole trip with you. The whole time he's holding an itinerary with time spans that you can spend on certain sections so you can catch as much commented feedings as possible.
Stolas has you to stop at every stall with snacks. So what, Sitri has a whole bag of them? Those he can have anytime, but these are only available at the Zoo (they're not)
The only one who's allowed to tour the Zoo on his own, separate from the group is Naberius, because nobody's willing to stop at every enclosure so he can read the plaques and commit them to memory. The only ones he avoids are canines bc they count as his family or smth and he hates to see them caged.
Oh lord the amount of times you've accidentally left Amon behind because he fell asleep while sitting somewhere in shade on a bench. Only once Beel returns from his food tasting will Amon stick with the group, so he can spend time by his side.
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Similar to Glasyalabolas, Ronove likes to hang around vultures and animals known to scare people. If there's a night exhibition, he'd also enjoy that. Partially because when people get startled when they enter a room and see him just silently standing there.
Phenix is kinda a hard one. Obviously, in their state it's difficult to go out anywhere in the human world. They agree, so they're content wiht just seeing Paimon's photos.
Another demon, who better be left at home is Dantalian. Sure, he can pass as a human, but you'd have to have him on a leash or keep an eye on him constantly. The moment he's out of your sight, he'll just try to get into an enclosure of some dangerous animal.
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Taking out Belphegor could be actually funny. Get him a wheelchair and take turns witht he rest of your group pushing him around. Just make sure to not leave him anywhere, just like Amon.
Beleth loves the house of felines. He's the exact opposite of Naberius. He's aware how endangered some large cat breeds are and he's happy to see some of his nearly extinct relatives safely protected.
Our floor gremlin Gusion has the answer to every question you might have about an animal. How? He's literally looking at the plaque rn. (*tired side-eye*)
A trip? Bathin very much cuncurs. Actually, why even go to a local Zoo when you can go to the one at the other side of the country? But don't get surprised if he gets a bit too excited iykwim.
Andrealphus spends most of the time in an area dedicated to bees and showcasing beekeeping. (my zoo has it and it's super adorable) Most of the animal enclosures have a stench to them and the pollinating flowers are so soothing to him. Also there's something about the constant buzzing that helps calm his mind.
As long as Belphegor doesn't go, Agares is happy to join you. He's taken over his country and now he would like to take over your attention? Not happening. It's either him or Belphie.
And as a loyal servant, Vassago refuses to go anywhere if his king is not going either. If you end up going with these two, however, I would avoid commented feeding since they could technicaly count as a speech.
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Being there since the begining, Lucifer's seen all the animals on earth as they were made by God, so he doesn't really see a reason to go to a Zoo, but eventually agrees to go when the others keep talking about it.
Morax is the best demon to take with you. All animals tend to naturally flock to him and so whenever you approach an enclosure, the animal will walk as close to him as it can, giving you the best view and if it's safe to, you can even pet it.
Big cat lover no.2 AKA Marbas! Will wait unti it's the cats' feeding time and then just watch as they tear their meal apart (it's usually a whole dead rabbit from what I've seen).
Buer would much more preffer a quiet getaway to maybe do some yoga or meditation, but nobody really asks him. As long as it makes you happy, he's happy to tag along. You'll probably find him later on with Adrealphus in the bee field.
Ooh, Gamigin loves snakes! They remind him of dragons (notice how he doesn't think they're related). "Wow, look at that one! I was that size when I was about 1000 years old!"
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Gabriel will most definitely decline your invitation to come along from the get go, so here's what you do: instead of a trip to a Zoo, you tell him that you're going a place where humans celebrate all the different types of God's creations. If he actually endures the whole schebang is a whole different question, though.
Been there, seen the animals before. Michael isn't interested in going anywhere where humans congregate. Though, it would make wiping them out easier.
Raphael is actually happy to go along with you. The whole experience is like reading a book witht he author's commentary. "Oh, that one was my idea. Can you tell?", "Yeah, I was telling Michael that it was a bad idea, but he wouldn't listen.", "Ahah, that one is scary to you? Gabriel made that one!"
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lazylittledragon · 11 months ago
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I like that in game the companions are always wearing very cunty high fantasy clothes and you always draw them in comfy sweaters/cardigans/pyjamas. as they deserve tbh
they deserve COMFORT!!!
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uchuujinu · 4 months ago
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starryeyeddreamer21 · 5 months ago
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Hazbin Hotel Incorrect Quotes
Lucifer: *walks into the room covered in lipstick marks* Hey... why is everyone looking at me like that?
Vaggie: Um, Sir, you've got a little something... everywhere
Charlie: Mom WHY
Lilith: *puzzled* It wasn't me
Angel: Than who-
Alastor: *walks in with smudged lipstick* What's going on in here?
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ryllen · 9 months ago
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psalmsofpsychosis · 8 months ago
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Me: yeah no i can cook gutwrenching Batman headcanons
Gotham TV: baby Bruce curls besides Alfred's hospital bed after Alfred gets stabbed in the heart, never leaves his side for one moment to the point that Gordon has to bring him food, he's red faced and hicking up all the time, whispers to Gordon "i can't lose him; he's all i have," and after Alfred comes back to life he brings books from Wayne Manor and softly reads horror bedtime stories to Alfred during the day until Alfred eases down and falls asleep
Me: god nevermind
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butterscotchcakee · 4 months ago
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sentient-stove · 2 months ago
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They were kneeling alone at the center of the crater and so Bruce picked his way down one side, the child not noticing or not caring as his steps echoed in the silence that was left behind.
"Daniel."
A stifled sob, one bright green eye looking back at Bruce as the rest of his hair hid his face. "I don't know what I'm doing wrong.... it always ends the same way.."
"I know kid." There was nothing but ruin left behind, the itching feeling as the time loop fractured and waited for it's creator to reset it. Nothing happened- yet- and Daniel hunched on himself more, hands coming to cup over his sternum.
"I keep thinking that I can fix it this time, I can fix this, I have to fix this, I don't want to be alone-" He pulled his hands away, and sat within them was an orb about the size of a chicken egg, glowing the same soft green as the shell that Bruce had walked into. "I can fix it, I just have to try again. I will fix it this time."
"You're tired, aren't you?"
"I can't give up."
"We both know that things won't change, not for lack of trying on your part." Bruce crouched down so they were level, staring him dead on. "I am so sorry Daniel."
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Michael (cb/t, b*llbusting, ) (((wip, likely won’t be finished))))
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To be scolded over the slightest things was annoying, hair ruffled by the wind? You’re getting yelled at. Clothes slightly as-cue? You’re getting chewed out for this. Micheal genuinely doesn’t care if his ‘Lord’ has a reason to look frazzled. He wants you to look perfect at all times.
He’d manually fix everything on your person so you looked picture perfect whenever roaming the streets..
Even with his admiration and affection you had to draw the line with his constant need to be in control.
Today was the day you had enough, with Gabriel feeling the need to interrupt you while you were showering once again. You hated the lack of privacy, you had shoved him away and before you could respond he has a hand on your thigh. “Let me take care of you, I’ll get it done faster and I’m more thorough.” He said in an almost proud tone as he reached for the soap, it slipped out of your hand and onto the ground.
You try to shove him back but he stands his ground. You think for a second, deciding to do what would make any man lose his ground. You hit him between his legs, a surprised yelp escapes him as he steps (or tries to) back but loses his footing, making him slip on the soap on the ground.
He lands on his knees legs spread, you bite your lip at the thoughts crossing your mind. You want to stomp on him, you want to tell him to go fuck himself for invading your privacy no matter how many times you tell him to stop.
He gives you a surprised glance. “Why are you looking at me like that? I just…slipped.” He fixes his soaked clothes as he adjust to sit up. You stop him by stomping on his clothed groin. He flinches and jumps a little. This time you get more of a reaction, he visibly winced his legs close around yours, he hugs your thigh for support. “Master…please, your weights…”
He half whimpered out, he was noticeably breathless as he tried to move back. “Does it hurt?” You hiss out, twisting your foot and making the angel writhe under you. You were grateful that the shower left you soaked, as you could feel yourself getting wet at the visual of the angel. “I hope it does.”
You growled the last part as you bounce your foot and Michael lurched forwards and almost knocks you over.
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magicicephoenix · 2 months ago
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drops this wip in ur inbox and books it
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(im painting him! because i want more digital painting practice)
LOOKING SO HARD AT HIM. I’M ENTRANCED. PAINTING HIM???!!! WOAGH
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dandelionjack · 8 months ago
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it seems the folks over on gallifreybase are miles ahead of us. look at the quote they posted! i was getting a bit skeptical about the tv show theory because some people on here disillusioned me, but this has reaffirmed my faith in it
it’s your life, Doctor. it’s telling the story of your life.
lights, camera, action. go figure!
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